July 12, 2026 • 43 mins
No weekends. No vacations. No parole. The Fifth Hour Mailbag keeps cranking as Robbie the Mariners Fan climbs back into the co-host chair alongside Ben Maller for another edition of organized audio chaos. The questions? Completely unhinged. The answers? Somehow even more so. This week's grab bag includes the Cheeseburger Index, DNA dog poop detectives, the bizarre world of Guinness World Records, Netflix and the homeless, Minecraft scholarships, internet hurricane IShowSpeed, Sacred Water, and a buffet of other listener-generated oddities that make you question humanity's decision-making skills. It's part talk show, part variety show, part group therapy session for night owls who took a wrong turn at Albuquerque. As always, Ben sprinkles in useless knowledge you didn't know you needed, sarcastic life observations, and enough verbal shenanigans to keep the podcast police on high alert.Listen, laugh, question your life choices, and remember: on the Fifth Hour, normal is grounds for immediate dismissal.
All questions sent in by new listeners & P1's of the #MallerMilitia! Download, subscribe, and remember that sharing is caring (unless it's an STD.) Follow Ben on Twitter @BenMaller and listen to the original terrestrial radio edition of "Ben Maller Show," Monday-Friday on Fox Sports Radio, 2a-6a ET, 11p-3a PT!...Follow, rate & review "The Fifth Hour!"
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Kubbooms.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
of the old republic, a sol fashion of fairness. He
treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow to the clearing
House of hot takes, break free for something special. The
(00:23):
Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
In the air eywhere the Fifth Hour with me, Ben Mallor,
as we hang out together. On the twelfth of July,
a Sunday. Sunday Sunday, the All Star Break in Major
League Baseball begins hours from now. A couple of this
(00:50):
Home Run Derby is on Monday. We Home Run Derby,
It's on Netflix. Which'll what are they gonna have Jameis
Winston running around selling popcorn or someone who knows? And
then Home Run Derby on Monday, as I said, and
then the All Star Game on Tuesday. The main event, though,
is on Wednesday, the Malor Palooza. Wednesday into Thursday, the
Malor Palooza. It's back. We are fired up. Some big
(01:14):
name headliners will be in the Malor Palooza. This year,
and wait till you hear one of the acts in
particular I'm most excited to hear. I don't want to
give it away here, but that'll be coming up in
the meantime. Ohio al get me in the mood. OHIOO,
you know what time it is?
Speaker 4 (01:31):
It's all right?
Speaker 3 (01:46):
Well, without further ado, we spun the wheel round and
round and round and round and round and round. Who
would pop up? Was it gonna be?
Speaker 1 (01:56):
Bree No? Who would it be? Would it be no? Stredenish?
Speaker 3 (02:00):
No? Round and round? And wait a minute? Big money,
big money, big money? And stop Robbie the Mariner fan?
Speaker 5 (02:11):
What's up?
Speaker 3 (02:11):
Everybody?
Speaker 5 (02:12):
Good to be back again.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Robbie, Robbie, Robbie, you have World Cup fever. Robbie.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
We're down to the final four. We're down to the four, Robbie.
And I think I'm guaranteed of having a team in
the final because I believe I have. I don't have
it in front of me, but I think I have
England and Argentina, and I believe they are playing.
Speaker 5 (02:29):
If I am not miss, I believe they're playing each other.
Don't quote me on that.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Oh no, I think they are.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
I think they are in the other side of the
racket as France and Spain. So I don't think I
have either one of those teams.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
I don't think I do, but I have.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
I know I have England and I believe I have Argentina.
So that's all. It's all about me, Robbie. You know,
I like anything. You worry about what your team's that's it.
You've gotten this. You told me. Your dad's into this too, right,
Your dad's big World Cup guy.
Speaker 5 (02:56):
Yeah, it's shocking because he's always kind of looked at
me over the years, was like, how did he inherit
the sports gene? It was must not have been for
me for his point of view, because uh, he's not
a big sports guy. But he watched a couple of
matches while he was sick, and then he just kept
watching him once the bug went away. And E'SI a
th kind of going to Portland Timbers game of Augus
(03:18):
Now it's crazy.
Speaker 4 (03:19):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Yeah, my dad was the same way back. My pretty
much my entire family not sports people. My mom. My
mom kind of liked the Dodgers growing up and she
was a little bit into that, but that was it.
And so I am the I'm the the ugly goat,
the redheaded sheet, everyone to say. I mean, I'm like that.
I stand out because my pretty much my entire family,
they're not really sports people. They're not into sports. So
(03:43):
but I love you know, it's my thing. It's my
my thing. And then we the Saturday night special. I
you know, I don't watch a lot of UFC. Another thing,
you're a big UFC guy, Robbie. I I picked my spots.
I have a lot of friends that are very much
into it. My best friend, I'm the only guy I'm
still friends with from high school who is my buddy.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
He loves the UFC.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
And then my brother in law big fan of UFC,
and I'm I'm like, I'll watch it, you know, I'll
make some food whatever with those guys, but I'm not
really into it. I McGregor. Connor McGregor is one of
those guys that is good for what we do here
because he says a lot of crazy crap and he
just talks out of his took us and it's good
for what we do. And if only he could back
(04:26):
that up, Robbie, my god, yeah, it was.
Speaker 5 (04:30):
You know, I didn't think well. I told everyone that
would ask me, who do you think you should win?
And with my heart I would be like, oh, I
think Connor will somehow win. But I really didn't believe
even myself. But I didn't think it was gonna go
like that. I thought he would. I thought he'd get
his as. I didn't think he was gonna blow out
his knee on the first kick you through.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Though.
Speaker 5 (04:49):
Of course, now there's all these conspiratorial videos of you know,
when they do the b roll in the show, I'm
working out in the back and for the fight. Yeah,
it sure looks like with high it's like, granted being
twenty twenty, is that he hurt his plague going into
the fight, that he knew it was messed up and
he was yeah, which is that's wild. Never bet I
(05:09):
used to bet on UFC and I realized at least
fifty percent of the time, one of the two fighters
going into the ring because granted, this isn't Connor, he's
he's well off. A lot of these guys don't get
paid a whole lot for what they do. They'll go
they'll hide injuries to go into fights, and you never know,
if you're betting on what's on paper, you could be
betting on a guy who's fighting on a torn acl
(05:31):
So I never bet UFC anymore, and this kind of
is a good reason why.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
Well, and also you wonder if there's some insurance stuff
involved in that where they had he had to get
out there.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
I'm not sure how yeah works, Like you know.
Speaker 3 (05:43):
If he gets hurt early in the fight, that's one thing.
If it doesn't happen, there's a lot of money on
the line. I'm not sure if that's exactly I'm talking about.
Speaker 5 (05:51):
Who knows. I know Vegas took a huge lion or
hear did a lot of liability with They kept tempting
people bet on Connor. He got up to it plus
two eighty underdog at one point, and I guess either
Vegas knew he was hurt or knew he was lose regardless,
because they were it seemed like they were baking people
with that line to put a little bit of money
(06:12):
on Connor.
Speaker 3 (06:14):
Yeah. I always get skeptical when I hear a lot
of the pundits, the big name pundits, who are all
trying to get you to go to one side, because
that tells me they might be getting information from somebody to.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Try to help out. Yeah yeah, books.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
All right, well let's get to it. We have letters,
thanks to again Ohioo, who got us in the mood.
We have first one up my man Reggie from Detroit.
He says, Ben, you need to start selling some trash
from the mallord Palooza this year. You always like to say,
talk about dumb money.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
You make a killing.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
And then he pointed, we talked about this, I think
Reggie on the show, like for a minute. This guy
sold the bags of trash from Taylor's and he sold out,
sold out bags of trash. He called it pocket garbage
pieces for twenty five dollars, small cubes of trash the
(07:04):
guy picked up around Madison Square gardens. Now, the thing
about this, Reggie and Robbie is the guy's not that bright.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
Here's why.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Now you say he's bright because he sold out. That's true,
twenty five dollars a cube. He only sold fifty of them,
so if my math is correct, that he cleared over
one thousand dollars, I believe.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
I'm am I correct one.
Speaker 3 (07:24):
I think it's over that, I believe, so yeah, yeah,
and then he had to pay for shipping, so I don't know,
you could have even made more. Right, Yeah, you're gonna
been more? Why limited at fifty? How is anyone gonna know?
You know? Just go pick up trash and there you go.
The guy says, I love this too. He says he's
an artist, an artist, Yeah, that is a good artist.
Speaker 5 (07:45):
Would he like take that trash, make one of those
collage things you see the go viral?
Speaker 3 (07:50):
You know? Oh yeah, well maybe he did. I don't know,
but he.
Speaker 5 (07:55):
He probably could have done that, sold one piece of
it and been like, this is art. So I'm gon
ten for it. You know, our prices anymore.
Speaker 3 (08:03):
Twenty five dollars you get a good sold more. I well,
it's an idea, the Malapalooza bigger than a Taylor Swift
Travis who would not want to get a piece of trash?
When Marcel and Brooklyn starts humming bars, tom Yeah.
Speaker 5 (08:18):
Oh sorry, I was just gonna say, I don't know
which will be more noteworthy historically, but which one will
be more entertaining? The Mault Palusa clear as that for sure.
Speaker 3 (08:28):
Oh yeah, come on, Tommy, Tommy from the valley rights
in here and so CALLI says, which valley, by the way, Tommy,
there's multiple values Benny. Yeah, you mentioned in a previous
podcast that you visited Arowan the grocery store.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Are you going to go back to get some of
the sacred water?
Speaker 3 (08:45):
Thanks Tommy. Yeah, so Tommy points out Robbie, I don't
think you have this in your town in Oregon, But
in LA there's this place called Arowan which is really overpriced.
Speaker 5 (08:58):
Oh yeah, I remember you talk about it's like a
twenty dollars strawberry or yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
Yeah, yeah, it's insane. It's like all the people punch
in the face that live in LA will go there shop.
And anyway, they just introduced a twelve dollars bottle of
sacred water.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Oh boy, yeah, with.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
Unusual ingredients they say, and so for twelve actually by
Arawan standards, say, it's not Yeah, it's not really that
that expensive.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
Yeah, they they go crazy for some of this other crap.
Speaker 3 (09:35):
I'm feeling like, if it's just water, shouldn't there not
be any other stuff in there? You know what I mean?
It's like water.
Speaker 5 (09:41):
So yeah, I mean this just shows how much how
I waste my time. But I once read an article
that there are places called water bars because people there
are certain people that swear water tastes different base on
where you draw it from. And there's I believe in Bend,
Oregon as a like six months ago, there was a
(10:01):
restaurant that was like a high end steakhouse, but it
also had you know, they have like a pairing list,
a wine steak water pairing list, and so that I
don't know. I almost hope that's not a thing six
months from article, but apparently at one point it was.
They're trying to make water up.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
Listen to me, Robbie, if I ever get to a
point where I'm going to a water bar, I want
you to bludge in me. Okay, take a bat and
just bludge in me. That's what I want you to do.
Speaker 5 (10:26):
Yes, stay here. I didn't say, I said. I read it.
I would vomit. I'd feel well just going into the restaurant.
Speaker 3 (10:35):
Sacred water is described as a clarified tonic made with
grape juice, coconut milk, coconut water, jasmine te, basil, and
a couple other things I don't know how to pronounce.
And then raw, honey, well it's not it's not water.
Then if it's based on grape juice, coconut water, that's
(10:56):
that's false advertising, that's bull crap, and he.
Speaker 5 (11:00):
Like ed sugar baby.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
Yeah. Jolly's Skin Company said the drink was inspired by
the ancient understanding of water as a symbol of renewal. This,
this is the definition if you ever taken a business class.
Just cook up some bowl you know what, sell it
and yeah, wow, okay, yeah, I don't think I'll be
going back to Arowan, although it was interesting.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
When I walked through, I was like, wow, this is
this is ridiculous.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
David in Central Florida writes, and he's listening, he says,
he listens on WYGM seven forty on the AM dial.
It says, if that makes any difference, not really, not really.
I'm glad that you gave them a plug. Though. That's
great work. Every night last year I hurt my back,
David says, made some progress, but recently I heard it
(11:50):
again and now I have daily insomnia. All that blows
in the early morning, so I end up trying to
fall asleep to your show and it still makes me chuckle.
Wish me luck getting better, and tell your listeners to
take care of their backs. This is hell.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
Absolutely, that's brutal, man.
Speaker 3 (12:09):
You only get one of these things. With these body
things that we have, so it sucks. I feel better. David,
is it lower upper back? Does it matter?
Speaker 5 (12:18):
I don't know, I have lower and yeah it's not great.
Yeah you're a big guy. You're like, can you fix
my back? And like, sure, just lose weight?
Speaker 3 (12:32):
Oh I know, yeah, yeah, yeah, I have a bad knee.
And I go to the checked out.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
I'm like, well, they're just going to tell you to
lose weight. That's what you know.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
That's the first thing they say, right anytime.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
You go in there, lose weight. Okay, thank you.
Speaker 3 (12:47):
I didn't need to go to medical school. I could
have figured that one out.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
Thank you doctor. All right, David, good luck.
Speaker 3 (12:53):
A Willie from Florida writes in The Rather Big State,
will you might want to say what part?
Speaker 1 (13:00):
He says?
Speaker 3 (13:00):
Ben? Do you think Chargers quarterback Justin Herbert is going
to dump his girlfriend for being a failure? And this
is I don't know we mentioned this on the pot.
I'm not sure if we mentioned this or not, but
Justin Herbert's lady friend, Madison Beer, I guess it is
(13:22):
her name, and she's a musician and it was pretty
embarrassing this week. I don't know if someone's out to
get her or what. But she apparently was not able
to sell tickets at the she's on She's been on tour.
She wasn't able to sell tickets. They were saying tickets
were going for the price less than a beer actually
(13:43):
to watch a watch.
Speaker 5 (13:45):
Yeah, yeah, it was a I think you.
Speaker 3 (13:51):
Sent me this too, You did, Robbie right before Will
said you sent this.
Speaker 5 (13:56):
Yes, I was. I was like, malor riddle. Well, maybe
it wouldn't have made it a very good maal riddle,
but it was I had to share it with somebody.
It was a funny headline, but it was also kind
of mean spirited headlines. It was like, whoever was writing
it must have been like jilted by Madison beer in
the past or something.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
You always wonder like somebody's got to get her or
something like that, But I will. Yeah. My favorite one
of those stories is the AI one where some or
not Ai.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
It was TikTok.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
It was some music groups that on TikTok they booked
a bunch of shows to go on tour because they,
according to TikTok, they were unbelievably popular and they couldn't
sell tickets because they were all fake or not all,
but most of them were fake who were following them?
Speaker 1 (14:45):
So that's that.
Speaker 3 (14:46):
Mike from Wisconsin wrights in and says, Ben, do you
think I show Speed the kind of pull to get
India into the next World Cup? And he sent a
story here, this guy who's been.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
All over the World Cup.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
He's being paid, as I understand it, to be a
promoter of the World Cup, and so he's all over
the internet. I show Speed not his real name, by
the way, he was not, but his mom did not
say first name. I said a middle name, show last
name Speed. He just got the name and he was.
He's apparently been offered, according to this guy Mike, to
play soccer for India to try to get to them
(15:26):
in the World Cup in twenty thirty.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
So where is the.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
Where the World Cup is in twenty thirty?
Speaker 1 (15:33):
Do we know what country is to be in.
Speaker 3 (15:38):
That? Oh? Is that they're going to be the one
where they put the clouds the fake clouds? I don't know.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
I have no idea, Robbie, He'll get to that.
Speaker 5 (15:46):
I'm looking as.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
Our live coverage. Robbie the Marina fan is efforting this
right now live on IIF our mail bag the Sunday
mail bag here.
Speaker 5 (16:00):
So the twenty thirty is a combined bid by Morocco
Portugal in Spain. It's the next one, twenty thirty four,
that's in Saudi Arabia.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
Okay, so that so that's still ways away from that one.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Okay, Uh, that'll be well.
Speaker 5 (16:17):
I justed to see how the middle is in twenty
thirty four, you know, yeah, hopefully it's more peaceful than
it is since we started the weed band hip, since
you know what, we want to save the world.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
And then yeah, yeah, ever since we've been it's been
it's been interesting.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
Uh.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
So I show speed. Let's just give India an exemption
if he plays, like is he good at anything?
Speaker 4 (16:47):
Like?
Speaker 3 (16:47):
I don't know. I mean, I just see he's a goofball.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
I see him goofing around. I did.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
He had one of the great bloopers of all time
this week when he was interviewing Jalen Brown and they
were fing around at the game in Foxborough the other
day and Jalen they brought up Lebron's name and then
I show speeds. Oh man, Joel Embiid, I've been paraphrased,
but like Joel Embiid, Jalen Brown, Paul George Lebron and
(17:14):
then Jaylen Brown's well, no he's not there anymore.
Speaker 1 (17:16):
He was like, dude, it's like get traded to the Celtics.
Speaker 5 (17:21):
Yeah. The sports leagues are in just love with that guy.
So I don't know.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
They're a bunch of middle aged and older people that
don't really understand social media. So like, this guy's popular. Okay,
so I'm a lot of money that'll work. Why not?
Speaker 1 (17:41):
Maybe it is working?
Speaker 3 (17:42):
Who knows? Uh? Next up Shane from Nolan's Rights in
He says, Ben, I met you at a meet and
greet in Pittsburgh years ago. I'm sure you don't remember me.
I'm glad you well, uh, he says, are you gonna
have your wife drink Costco coffee now instead of Starbucks?
He says the Costco food Court coffee is just like Starbucks,
(18:08):
but cheaper. Apparently it's been they've been rolling this out
at stores across the United States. They can't believe it's
half the price of the star wars. Well, I don't
know about that, Shane in nor Leans, but I will
tell you my wife is a big fan of the
(18:28):
I don't drink coffee. My wife loves the Starbucks those
frozen not frozen. They're the metal cans, kind of silver cans.
The Starbucks they sell at the store, which is Kirkland brand.
It's like a ripoff of Starbucks that it's a a
big fan of that. So yeah, doesn't do anything. Yeah,
if she wants it, not going for that. You know
(18:52):
what else? I'd like to see the chicken figures, but
I understand they don't haven't gotten out here and they
don't have the fries like in Vancouver. So I think
I'm good on that. Dwight from Boston writes, and he says, Ben,
a university in California is offering to give a scholarship
if you can complete all one hundred and fifteen levels
of Minecraft? Does that really count at higher education? Asking
(19:16):
for a friend that's from Dwight in Boston. I have
never played Minecraft, so I don't know what one hundred
and fifteen advance advancements is. I guess that's a big thing.
Speaker 5 (19:27):
I'm very confused at that. I thought Minecraft was like
to build your own worlds in Minecraft.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
I'm that I don't know, Yeah, says Universe.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Here's the other giveaway.
Speaker 3 (19:38):
Dwight sent a story here, Robbie, it's University of Silicon Valley.
I don't know, is that an online thing or something
I've never heard of that.
Speaker 5 (19:47):
I've never heard of it, but I assume it has
it's a video game like degree course or something else.
I don't know. It's great promotion for them, Like I mean,
it sounds so wacky, but you've never heard of the
now you have, so guess good marketing on their part.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Is there mascot like an iPhone or something like that?
Would that be their masks? How about the Mariners? Man,
bad news for Robbie the Mariner. You see they got
sold to the guy from Sun Systems. I guess over
the weekend. It was announced yesterday his wife is going
to run the team. And that sounds like it's like
(20:26):
a debacle. That does not sound like that's going to
end well for the Seattle Seahawks in terms of ownership there.
We'll see how that goes, Trucker Joe writes in He says, Benny,
it has been a long time, a long ass time
since I asked a question, pretty much since Gagon was
on the podcast.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Well that's like two podcasts co people ago. Because we've
got bre helping.
Speaker 3 (20:46):
Us nowt now and we had Danny g before he quit.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
He was with us for a long time.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
Anyway, says my question is a bit morbid, But I'm curious,
the day you just check out of this world, will
your funeral or viewing be open to the militia? If no?
For if not for all who out of the Mallard
militia will be allowed? Thanks in advanced thats trucker show. Well,
how do you know your How do you know I'm gonna.
Speaker 1 (21:11):
Check out before you? Trucker Joe.
Speaker 3 (21:13):
You don't know that yet?
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Who knows?
Speaker 3 (21:18):
We never know. That's the beauty of life. You don't
know when you're gonna gonna exit, So uh no, I
I know someone else. As my dad said before he
checked out, that's your problem, son. Uh well, that's your problem.
I'm dead.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
You'll have to deal with that because I.
Speaker 3 (21:34):
Won't be here anymore. I'll be gone, so someone else
can worry about it.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
Orbit Trucker Shoe.
Speaker 5 (21:42):
If you want top it. It's a great It's on
the theme in a group manless your group chat. I've
been in for like eight years now. We jokingly said
one time that the only time we'll ever all actually
meet up is what us?
Speaker 6 (21:57):
Oh yeah, checks out. Yeah, that's fortunately, that's hugely.
Speaker 5 (22:11):
And I'm like, you know what, that's horrible.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
It's almost as bad as action, Robbie.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
I don't know what's going on, but you said.
Speaker 3 (22:19):
A little little Darth Vader.
Speaker 1 (22:26):
I don't know what's going on.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
It might be maybe some mine, probably.
Speaker 4 (22:31):
Not really.
Speaker 5 (22:35):
For me to even come back. I don't know what's
going on, Toma, little line.
Speaker 3 (22:41):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
It's a podcast.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
What are we gonna do? Truck Joe. Also, since I'm
still stuck here in nowhere uncle waiting on that airport
to be built, he says, all right, well, good luck,
good luck on that.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
We're really screwed.
Speaker 3 (23:06):
When they build that airport.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
We can't give those trips away anymore.
Speaker 3 (23:09):
I mean, that's it. Can't go can't go to nowhere
if there's an airport there, and then you can go
to nowhere and then we're there. Were in some trouble.
Corbin in the Bay Rights in the Bay Area says,
did you hear they had a fake homeless encampment here
in San Francisco And it was actually the set for
a Netflix movie they're making. And people have been freaking
(23:32):
out calling the police and it's all just for a
Netflix show. And that's from Corbin.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
In the Bay.
Speaker 3 (23:40):
I did see that headline, Corbin about the homeless thing.
The funny thing is I saw a photo of it
and it looked much cleaner than the actual homeless places
I've seen when I've traveled around San Francisco. I don't
go there that often, but I was just there in
February for the Super Bowl and traveling around seeing the
(24:01):
actual Sodom and Gomorra better knowing as the Tenderloin District.
H This this version was much cleaner, much much cleaner.
And and do they really need to make that for
a movie? Can't they just go film at the real
the real place.
Speaker 1 (24:19):
I don't know, so who knows.
Speaker 5 (24:22):
Yeah, Portland's kind of crazy too with that.
Speaker 3 (24:26):
So oh yeah. They're up and down the West coast
from Mahico to Canada. And even in Canada, there's some
spots in Vancouver. As my Manniko knows, that not the
prettiest place, not.
Speaker 5 (24:40):
The pretty anymore. It's almost a good idea to walk
around in narcan just in case you walk into a
fentanyl plot. When you're going on walks that happened to
a friend of mine the other day.
Speaker 3 (24:50):
So wow, that's a great testimonial. At some point somebody
narb Yeah, yeah, it's all like a pepper spray. How
about a two from and cumbo pepper spray and then
narcan boom done right there? Yeah? Yeah, you get attacked
and you spray the pepper spray and then if you
get the fentanyl, you just take that. Boom.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
You're good.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
What else? Alf from the Guinness Book of World Records.
He says, good day, Ben and friends of the podcast. Ben,
what are you planning to do with your extra segment
on Monday show that will replace Mallard of the third degree?
Seeing that you made history by passing Monday on a Friday?
(25:34):
Except from Alf? Yeah, well, Alf, what are the chances
that Coop will remember that he already passed me? And
what I should do is I imagine he'll actually ask questions,
So I should just be like, well, I'm not answering,
I'm not answering that I'm not and then he'll get
pissed and I'll say, well, you can't fail me because
I already and I already won. So that's that's it. Yeah,
(25:58):
I don't know Let's take take call from James talking
about God only knows what next? Up? What do we got?
Let's see here he says, Hey, big Ben and a
special guest. I think this is from the couple our
friend John and Joanna from the San Gabriel Valley. They
wrote in Big Ben and Special Guest, we have a
(26:19):
cat named Peta. It is an acronym for pain in
the Oh.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
That's good.
Speaker 3 (26:25):
I like that anyways. Loves the taste of salmon, but
doesn't like salmon doesn't like her, leaving us to clean
up quite the mess. Our question this week is there
a certain flavor of food or treats that does the
same to Moxie. Obviously pumpkin is ruled out. We all
(26:48):
know what happened when Moxy had Pumpkin. But maybe something
else that doesn't agree with your beloved dog MAXI has
been pretty good like in terms of what she actually loves.
It's pretty funny. I was at Costco a couple of
years ago and they had the dog treats and they
had a bulldog, an English bulldog on the box, and
(27:10):
I was like, hey, we got an English bulldog. I
wonder if Moxy all like these freaking loves those treats,
loves those treats, but doesn't really mess her up. The
food that messes Moxy up if there's a proper mix.
You know how they say, Robbie, you're not supposed to
give your dog leftovers like because it's not good for them.
But occasionally I will give the dog leftover food. If
(27:31):
I don't finish my food, I'll just and I have
noticed that the proper mix of cheeses just the right
there's a certain mix that will not hit Moxie the
right way and will cause a tremendous dissatisfaction to Moxie.
And obviously, the main issue that we have, and there's.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
Really no way around it.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
If you've ever had an English bulldog, John and Joanna
is the tooting, the farting is out of control. So
we try to try to limit certain foods for that.
You got any pets, Robbie, anything any pet related issues there? No,
you're good.
Speaker 5 (28:12):
My parents have a cat that I helped administer their
food or their medicine too, and it's getting older, and
it's a liquid medicine. You have to shoot down your
throat once a day, and it's it's not a fun ordeal.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
That sounds terrible.
Speaker 3 (28:28):
Yeah, well I've had like the cool the pills are
not bad because what you do, I've had this. You
just wrap it like in a piece of pepperoni or
something like that, and they'll eat the pepperoni.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
Then we realize eating the pill.
Speaker 3 (28:40):
If you have to spray something down the throat though,
that's man.
Speaker 5 (28:45):
Yeah, there's the one good side is obviously if you
can get it down it, it can't spit up. Because
we do have a cat that will dumb there. We
have another cat that my my dad will only that
my dad is allowed to put that one the pill
in the cat's throat, or she'll freak out for anyone else.
(29:05):
But she sometimes will just keep it in her mouth
and then spit it out when no one's looking.
Speaker 3 (29:10):
So niky a little devil, Yeah, exactly, all right, what
else did we have us to hear? Quang from Ho
Chim in Vietnam guaranteed human. By the way, Kwang, you
really made weed man smile when you said we should
get rid of his segment and make it all about Lisa.
He seemed to enjoy that, which I didn't think you
(29:31):
would enjoy anyway, Quank says believe it or not. The
raw chemical element that makes up the average one hundred
and fifty four pounds adult human.
Speaker 1 (29:40):
Bye, really average humans one hundred ft four pounds.
Speaker 3 (29:42):
I guess we're most mostly oxygen, carbon, hydrogen, nitrogen, calcium,
and phosphorus have a total market value of about five
hundred to fifteen hundred dollars. So at your heaviest band,
what do you think you're body was? Well, let me all,
(30:04):
I say, so this requires mal math, so I'm gonna
have to go to the calculator. Here.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
Hold on, So one.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Hundred and fifty four is one hundred and fifty four
pound human. So let's see here, hold on a secure
get the math out. So I was at least I
would say, let me see.
Speaker 4 (30:28):
Here, do do do?
Speaker 6 (30:31):
Do?
Speaker 3 (30:31):
Do?
Speaker 1 (30:32):
All right?
Speaker 3 (30:32):
So then you do the math on that, and then see.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
I should clear this out.
Speaker 3 (30:36):
Here we go. I got this all right, So then
times three, I think I was over four thousand dollars
in value.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
I was a value person. Quang, I'm like, big money.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
How do you get all that out?
Speaker 1 (30:50):
Though?
Speaker 3 (30:50):
The oxygen, the carbon, the hydrogen, the nitrogen, the othrus,
uh all kind.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
Of goes away.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
It all just goes away evaporates. Max from Florida wrights
in on the mail bag. He says, Ben, you and
the mal Or Militia should set a Guinness World record
like Pitbull did over the weekend. Have you thought about
doing this would be a great bit for the show. Thanks,
love you, Max from South Florida. Yeah, we have thought
(31:20):
about it, Max, I don't know how long you've been
listening to the show. By the way, Robbie, he says
that Pitbull set the Guinness World Record for the largest
gathering of people wearing bald caps twenty two forty one people.
This is in London. I guess over the weekend had
some British summer festival thing. Yeah, so Max, years and
(31:44):
years ago. This goes back, Man, might even go back
twenty years. I reached out to the people at Guinness.
I had an idea to set a record for the
most phone calls taken on a talk radio show in
one hour.
Speaker 1 (31:58):
I thought, well, that would be easy. I'll just keep
taking calls.
Speaker 3 (32:01):
Why not? How hard could that be? What qualifies for
a call? So I reached out to them and they
eventually took them a while to get back.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
They wrote back to.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
Me and then we're in an email chain. And then
I told them my idea and they were very receptive
to it. And then they told me how much it
was going to cost to it to do it, and
I was like, well, I'm good. So what they do,
Robbie and I don't know if they still do this,
but back then, years ago, in order to do this
you have to pay them.
Speaker 1 (32:28):
There's a fee.
Speaker 3 (32:29):
And then if I remember correctly, and I might have
this part wrong, I think you also had to cover
for a representative of the Guinness people to show up
because they have to have someone there wearing the jacket
with the thing.
Speaker 1 (32:42):
So it's it's a pretty pricey deal.
Speaker 3 (32:46):
Don't just do it? They were, you know, because they're
they're a for profit business.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
They're not a charity. So I don't have that kind
of scratch.
Speaker 3 (32:54):
Now, if somebody wants to put their money together in
the Mallard Militia, if you guys think it would be
a good bit for the show, I'd be more more
than happy to to do something like that.
Speaker 1 (33:04):
But it was just not feasible.
Speaker 3 (33:06):
I was doing weekends at the time, too, so it
was like, might make sense, Uh, it'll be fun to
have fun little thing to say, Hey, we have the
Guinness Book of World Records. It's just not it's not
a endeavor.
Speaker 5 (33:20):
So good marketing opportunity, I guess. But yeah, that is
the thing people don't realize, Like you said, it's the
for profit business. For some reason. You hear get world
records and they have all officially. You think it's like
an NGO or you know, some sort of like un
organization or something. But no, it's definitely not.
Speaker 3 (33:41):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (33:42):
Next up on the mail bag we have Luke. It'll
force be with you, Luke.
Speaker 3 (33:48):
Uh, it says Ben and Mystery Podcast mail bag friend.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
That'd be Robbie the Mariner fan.
Speaker 3 (33:53):
Luke. Do you support DNA testing for dog poop? He?
He says, there's a big building in Vancouver. By the way,
Luke did not say where he's from, so I don't
know if he's from Vancouver or not. Anyway, Luke says
there's a condo building in Vancouver that uses DNA testing
to solve the question who didn't pick up after their dog?
(34:16):
If you want to live in this building, you have
to register your dog. You have to give a cheek
swab DNA test seventy five dollars fee paid by the
owner to the management of the condo building, and then
anytime they find dog poo around the condo building, they
send it to a lab to have it tested and
(34:36):
they find whoever, whoever's.
Speaker 1 (34:39):
Dog did the do do so this.
Speaker 3 (34:42):
I don't think this is new, by the way, I
feel like this.
Speaker 5 (34:44):
Is no I've heard of something like this.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
Yeah, I don't think this is new.
Speaker 3 (34:47):
And I don't is that that necessary? I mean, you
should clean up after your dog. Do you really want
to live in a police state where they have the DNA?
Speaker 1 (34:56):
It seems a little I don't mont.
Speaker 5 (34:58):
I will say the crazy some of the crazier neighbor
interactions I've ever had and ever seen involved just taking
a dog for a walk and having them not even poop,
but like go pee on a bush that's connected to
the sidewalk. I mean, people get so up, but it
be about their yards, Like you gotta walk your dog somewhere,
you know. Yeah, there's been neighbors that have called the
(35:19):
cops on other neighbors because they they're like convinced their
dog they're having their dog only pee on their bushes
instead of like dispersing it in an even race or something,
and it's it's it's wild. Just some people just do
not like animals. And uh yeah, So I honestly I
see that it's an overreaction, but I see what probably
(35:42):
led that place to do that.
Speaker 1 (35:44):
That's a little much.
Speaker 3 (35:45):
I I have on the front occasionally gone out shopping
to the front of the house, and I'll come home
and there are a lot of people in our neighborhood
walk dogs or whatever, so and I'll see a dog
on our lawn, you know, and I yeah, but uh
and then immediately they'll see me pull up into the
like pull the dog leash, you know, try to get
the dog. I do give him the evil eye, but
(36:08):
I'm not doing DNA testing, you know.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
I'm like evil eye. But that's it. I don't go
beyond that.
Speaker 5 (36:13):
So who's the poor a hole that has to like
pick it up too and then send it off. It
doesn't seem fun if that's like the city job where
you just get called all day to pick up dog
boop to have it set off to a lab.
Speaker 3 (36:27):
But Nolan from the Valley of the Sun rites in
on the mail bag. He says, hey, Ben, good idea
or bad idea? A museum covered its floor with enough
peanut butter to make fifteen thousand sandwiches to honor. It
was an artist that died. I guess a tribute to
a Dutch artist. I have no idea who this person is.
(36:48):
They used over eight hundred pounds of peanut butter a
museum in Rotterdam.
Speaker 1 (36:54):
I don't even know where that is.
Speaker 3 (36:56):
I'm gonna go.
Speaker 1 (36:58):
Bad idea how about that? I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (37:00):
This guy must have loved peanut butter. He must have
been all about the peanut butter. I don't know.
Speaker 5 (37:05):
I've had to completely take peanut butter out of my diet.
It's gonna lose weight. So yeah, peanut butter is a
it's an amazing thing.
Speaker 3 (37:13):
But you know, yeah, that sounds like when I worked
with Looney and I used to We used to get
up early on Sunday to do the Blitz and I'd
come in there with a big coup of orange juice.
I loved orange juice, and every week Looney would bitch
at me, eat the orange, don't drink the juice. You're
drinking thirty five oranges.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
I'm like, oh God, leave me.
Speaker 3 (37:31):
Alone, dude.
Speaker 5 (37:33):
I know the sad factcause he's probably he's right, but yeah,
no one wants to hear it.
Speaker 3 (37:38):
He is, he is, you know, it's it's true.
Speaker 1 (37:41):
All right, what else we got to get out of here?
We get any more that seem good?
Speaker 3 (37:49):
I don't know I got and they all seem okay, Robbie,
But uh, all right, how about this, Well we'll get
out on this. Trevor in Texas rights and he says, Ben,
you got to come visit town, do a mala meat
and greet, and you can get cheap cheeseburgers. According to
the Cheeseburger Index. The f is that cheeseburger Index. The
(38:12):
comfort food a cheeseburger, fries and a soda classic American
comfort food. A new Door Dash report says the cheapest
comfort food in America is in that meal cheeseburger, fries
and soda in Austin, Texas, Robbi, you can get that
(38:35):
for twelve ninety four. The average price of that meal
is twelve ninety four, lowest in America. They said. The
lowest prices are in the South and Southeast. Most affordable
the most expensive. You want to take a shot, Robbie.
The most expensive classic American food according to the Cheeseburger Index.
Speaker 5 (38:55):
Yeah, I would. This isn't going to be a California, No,
believe it. Why, Oh, that's actually shocking to me.
Speaker 3 (39:03):
Well, it's not when you realize where it is. Think
about now, it's oh Hawaii. Now close another state that's
not connected directly to Alaska, Alaska, Anchorage, Alaska. That same
meal that is twelve dollars and ninety four cents in Austin,
Texas will cost you twenty eight dollars and twenty eight cents.
(39:24):
Oh my, that's outrageous, even for the cheeseburger index. That's
not right, Robie.
Speaker 1 (39:30):
That's a lot of that's a lot of cash.
Speaker 5 (39:32):
You know, if you're addicted to cheeseburgers. At one point,
I at one point I may have been maybe I
should have moved to Alaska and I would have dropped
the sixty pounds a little bit quicker.
Speaker 3 (39:43):
But up been there. Let's see here, four cities in
the lone Star state made the list. Laredo, Texas thirteen
thirty nine. Lincoln, Nebraska was on there. Detroit, how about Detroit? Philadelphia? Also,
that's for the affordable part. The affordable part stretch things
on the cheeseburger index. So thanks to Trevor in I'd
(40:08):
love to do it. Be great. You know, it's weird.
I don't know. We have a lot of listeners in texts.
I get a lot of email from people in Texas.
We don't have too many callers from Texas. It's odd.
I don't know why that is. I mean, we have
a few, it's it's a huge state.
Speaker 5 (40:21):
Yeah, that's actually a good point. I what happened to that?
There used to be this very curmudgety guy that lived
in like San Antonio that I played an amount of
money once on the show before you went on your
Christmas vacation and we went. We had like a zero
zero tie. I forget his name, but he stopped calling.
Speaker 6 (40:40):
Was that.
Speaker 3 (40:40):
Yeah, we had a couple guys in San Antonio that
would call. There was one who would give quotes poetry guy.
Uh yeah, I don't know. I don't know what happened
to these guys. They come in.
Speaker 5 (40:51):
Carly and San Antonio is still alive, if you want
to know. He texted me the other day. He's just
got kids now and he's like an actual adult, so.
Speaker 3 (40:59):
He's all up. Yeah. Remember we had Alice, That kid
called her for a while. He called up.
Speaker 5 (41:05):
I'll never forget where I was the night he called up.
Remember when he called up and You're like, are you
in the bathroom? And he's like no, And then you
heard the toilet flush. I was about to get on
a plane from Denver to Portland and I was listening
on iHeartRadio app and I start burst out laughing, and
I'm lucky I didn't get like red flak. I'm getting
on the plane because I kind of forgot where it was.
(41:28):
In that moment, I was just like, it was so funny,
and it took I snapped back around. There's about a
hundred people looking at you right now, probably looking like
you're a lunatic.
Speaker 1 (41:37):
And I was like, oh, sorry, that's great.
Speaker 3 (41:39):
Yeah, well, my well the kid remember the kid in
the bay a we had We took down Justin.
Speaker 5 (41:45):
Well and Justin's defence Coop did the math wrong. Justin
actually won. But yes, it was a close fight. Yeah,
but I remember that.
Speaker 3 (41:53):
Yeah, that that kid's probably all growing up now too, right,
It's yeah, that's.
Speaker 1 (41:59):
Maggie killed me. That this little girl all.
Speaker 3 (42:01):
Up and go to hell Lebron James.
Speaker 1 (42:04):
And she's like grown up. I think she's got kids.
Speaker 3 (42:06):
It's freaking crazy. How fast that? All right? We'll get
out on that. Thank you, Robbie, appreciate it, and I'll
be back tonight. Should be a normal week, no days off,
no days off, so I'll be in the his and
we got to Benny the big award show. When I
award show, it's the Mallard Palooza, so we will be
(42:27):
awarding a winner of the Malord Palooza. That'll be coming
up Wednesday and the Thursday.
Speaker 1 (42:32):
Look forward to that.
Speaker 3 (42:33):
And until then, anything you want to promote, Robbie, by
the way, anything you want to.
Speaker 5 (42:39):
I would like to not promote my connection. Whatever happened
tonight was not great. But you know, the show I
do with Thosy Guy on Sunday Mornings is still going
the United States of Australia on YouTube. So that's something
we can check out if you want to sell it.
Speaker 3 (42:55):
Robbie, I'm on the greatest YouTube show in the world.
It's only one day a week, it's it's international, it's amazing,
it's life changing. I gotta teach you how to be
a salesman, Robbie. You gotta know.
Speaker 5 (43:08):
I you know, usually I'm pretty good as that. I'm
just so rattled. I feel terrible. I just know the
about the amount of crap I want to get from
people who listen to this and shoot shoot something. My
way to say, hey, your connection was great, ahole, but yeah.
Speaker 3 (43:26):
Will not at all be rude or Justin or any
of those guys at all. All Right, anyway, I have
a wonderful, wonderful rest of your Sunday and I will
chat with you all tonight. Uh well, you late on
the overnight and we have fresh pods next week as well.
See you that my flation
Kubbooms.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
of the old republic, a sol fashion of fairness. He
treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow to the clearing
House of hot takes, break free for something special. The
(00:23):
Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
In the air eywhere the Fifth Hour with me, Ben Mallor,
as we hang out together. On the twelfth of July,
a Sunday. Sunday Sunday, the All Star Break in Major
League Baseball begins hours from now. A couple of this
(00:50):
Home Run Derby is on Monday. We Home Run Derby,
It's on Netflix. Which'll what are they gonna have Jameis
Winston running around selling popcorn or someone who knows? And
then Home Run Derby on Monday, as I said, and
then the All Star Game on Tuesday. The main event, though,
is on Wednesday, the Malor Palooza. Wednesday into Thursday, the
Malor Palooza. It's back. We are fired up. Some big
(01:14):
name headliners will be in the Malor Palooza. This year,
and wait till you hear one of the acts in
particular I'm most excited to hear. I don't want to
give it away here, but that'll be coming up in
the meantime. Ohio al get me in the mood. OHIOO,
you know what time it is?
Speaker 4 (01:31):
It's all right?
Speaker 3 (01:46):
Well, without further ado, we spun the wheel round and
round and round and round and round and round. Who
would pop up? Was it gonna be?
Speaker 1 (01:56):
Bree No? Who would it be? Would it be no? Stredenish?
Speaker 3 (02:00):
No? Round and round? And wait a minute? Big money,
big money, big money? And stop Robbie the Mariner fan?
Speaker 5 (02:11):
What's up?
Speaker 3 (02:11):
Everybody?
Speaker 5 (02:12):
Good to be back again.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Robbie, Robbie, Robbie, you have World Cup fever. Robbie.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
We're down to the final four. We're down to the four, Robbie.
And I think I'm guaranteed of having a team in
the final because I believe I have. I don't have
it in front of me, but I think I have
England and Argentina, and I believe they are playing.
Speaker 5 (02:29):
If I am not miss, I believe they're playing each other.
Don't quote me on that.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Oh no, I think they are.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
I think they are in the other side of the
racket as France and Spain. So I don't think I
have either one of those teams.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
I don't think I do, but I have.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
I know I have England and I believe I have Argentina.
So that's all. It's all about me, Robbie. You know,
I like anything. You worry about what your team's that's it.
You've gotten this. You told me. Your dad's into this too, right,
Your dad's big World Cup guy.
Speaker 5 (02:56):
Yeah, it's shocking because he's always kind of looked at
me over the years, was like, how did he inherit
the sports gene? It was must not have been for
me for his point of view, because uh, he's not
a big sports guy. But he watched a couple of
matches while he was sick, and then he just kept
watching him once the bug went away. And E'SI a
th kind of going to Portland Timbers game of Augus
(03:18):
Now it's crazy.
Speaker 4 (03:19):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Yeah, my dad was the same way back. My pretty
much my entire family not sports people. My mom. My
mom kind of liked the Dodgers growing up and she
was a little bit into that, but that was it.
And so I am the I'm the the ugly goat,
the redheaded sheet, everyone to say. I mean, I'm like that.
I stand out because my pretty much my entire family,
they're not really sports people. They're not into sports. So
(03:43):
but I love you know, it's my thing. It's my
my thing. And then we the Saturday night special. I
you know, I don't watch a lot of UFC. Another thing,
you're a big UFC guy, Robbie. I I picked my spots.
I have a lot of friends that are very much
into it. My best friend, I'm the only guy I'm
still friends with from high school who is my buddy.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
He loves the UFC.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
And then my brother in law big fan of UFC,
and I'm I'm like, I'll watch it, you know, I'll
make some food whatever with those guys, but I'm not
really into it. I McGregor. Connor McGregor is one of
those guys that is good for what we do here
because he says a lot of crazy crap and he
just talks out of his took us and it's good
for what we do. And if only he could back
(04:26):
that up, Robbie, my god, yeah, it was.
Speaker 5 (04:30):
You know, I didn't think well. I told everyone that
would ask me, who do you think you should win?
And with my heart I would be like, oh, I
think Connor will somehow win. But I really didn't believe
even myself. But I didn't think it was gonna go
like that. I thought he would. I thought he'd get
his as. I didn't think he was gonna blow out
his knee on the first kick you through.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Though.
Speaker 5 (04:49):
Of course, now there's all these conspiratorial videos of you know,
when they do the b roll in the show, I'm
working out in the back and for the fight. Yeah,
it sure looks like with high it's like, granted being
twenty twenty, is that he hurt his plague going into
the fight, that he knew it was messed up and
he was yeah, which is that's wild. Never bet I
(05:09):
used to bet on UFC and I realized at least
fifty percent of the time, one of the two fighters
going into the ring because granted, this isn't Connor, he's
he's well off. A lot of these guys don't get
paid a whole lot for what they do. They'll go
they'll hide injuries to go into fights, and you never know,
if you're betting on what's on paper, you could be
betting on a guy who's fighting on a torn acl
(05:31):
So I never bet UFC anymore, and this kind of
is a good reason why.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
Well, and also you wonder if there's some insurance stuff
involved in that where they had he had to get
out there.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
I'm not sure how yeah works, Like you know.
Speaker 3 (05:43):
If he gets hurt early in the fight, that's one thing.
If it doesn't happen, there's a lot of money on
the line. I'm not sure if that's exactly I'm talking about.
Speaker 5 (05:51):
Who knows. I know Vegas took a huge lion or
hear did a lot of liability with They kept tempting
people bet on Connor. He got up to it plus
two eighty underdog at one point, and I guess either
Vegas knew he was hurt or knew he was lose regardless,
because they were it seemed like they were baking people
with that line to put a little bit of money
(06:12):
on Connor.
Speaker 3 (06:14):
Yeah. I always get skeptical when I hear a lot
of the pundits, the big name pundits, who are all
trying to get you to go to one side, because
that tells me they might be getting information from somebody to.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Try to help out. Yeah yeah, books.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
All right, well let's get to it. We have letters,
thanks to again Ohioo, who got us in the mood.
We have first one up my man Reggie from Detroit.
He says, Ben, you need to start selling some trash
from the mallord Palooza this year. You always like to say,
talk about dumb money.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
You make a killing.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
And then he pointed, we talked about this, I think
Reggie on the show, like for a minute. This guy
sold the bags of trash from Taylor's and he sold out,
sold out bags of trash. He called it pocket garbage
pieces for twenty five dollars, small cubes of trash the
(07:04):
guy picked up around Madison Square gardens. Now, the thing
about this, Reggie and Robbie is the guy's not that bright.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
Here's why.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Now you say he's bright because he sold out. That's true,
twenty five dollars a cube. He only sold fifty of them,
so if my math is correct, that he cleared over
one thousand dollars, I believe.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
I'm am I correct one.
Speaker 3 (07:24):
I think it's over that, I believe, so yeah, yeah,
and then he had to pay for shipping, so I don't know,
you could have even made more. Right, Yeah, you're gonna
been more? Why limited at fifty? How is anyone gonna know?
You know? Just go pick up trash and there you go.
The guy says, I love this too. He says he's
an artist, an artist, Yeah, that is a good artist.
Speaker 5 (07:45):
Would he like take that trash, make one of those
collage things you see the go viral?
Speaker 3 (07:50):
You know? Oh yeah, well maybe he did. I don't know,
but he.
Speaker 5 (07:55):
He probably could have done that, sold one piece of
it and been like, this is art. So I'm gon
ten for it. You know, our prices anymore.
Speaker 3 (08:03):
Twenty five dollars you get a good sold more. I well,
it's an idea, the Malapalooza bigger than a Taylor Swift
Travis who would not want to get a piece of trash?
When Marcel and Brooklyn starts humming bars, tom Yeah.
Speaker 5 (08:18):
Oh sorry, I was just gonna say, I don't know
which will be more noteworthy historically, but which one will
be more entertaining? The Mault Palusa clear as that for sure.
Speaker 3 (08:28):
Oh yeah, come on, Tommy, Tommy from the valley rights
in here and so CALLI says, which valley, by the way, Tommy,
there's multiple values Benny. Yeah, you mentioned in a previous
podcast that you visited Arowan the grocery store.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Are you going to go back to get some of
the sacred water?
Speaker 3 (08:45):
Thanks Tommy. Yeah, so Tommy points out Robbie, I don't
think you have this in your town in Oregon, But
in LA there's this place called Arowan which is really overpriced.
Speaker 5 (08:58):
Oh yeah, I remember you talk about it's like a
twenty dollars strawberry or yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
Yeah, yeah, it's insane. It's like all the people punch
in the face that live in LA will go there shop.
And anyway, they just introduced a twelve dollars bottle of
sacred water.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Oh boy, yeah, with.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
Unusual ingredients they say, and so for twelve actually by
Arawan standards, say, it's not Yeah, it's not really that
that expensive.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
Yeah, they they go crazy for some of this other crap.
Speaker 3 (09:35):
I'm feeling like, if it's just water, shouldn't there not
be any other stuff in there? You know what I mean?
It's like water.
Speaker 5 (09:41):
So yeah, I mean this just shows how much how
I waste my time. But I once read an article
that there are places called water bars because people there
are certain people that swear water tastes different base on
where you draw it from. And there's I believe in Bend,
Oregon as a like six months ago, there was a
(10:01):
restaurant that was like a high end steakhouse, but it
also had you know, they have like a pairing list,
a wine steak water pairing list, and so that I
don't know. I almost hope that's not a thing six
months from article, but apparently at one point it was.
They're trying to make water up.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
Listen to me, Robbie, if I ever get to a
point where I'm going to a water bar, I want
you to bludge in me. Okay, take a bat and
just bludge in me. That's what I want you to do.
Speaker 5 (10:26):
Yes, stay here. I didn't say, I said. I read it.
I would vomit. I'd feel well just going into the restaurant.
Speaker 3 (10:35):
Sacred water is described as a clarified tonic made with
grape juice, coconut milk, coconut water, jasmine te, basil, and
a couple other things I don't know how to pronounce.
And then raw, honey, well it's not it's not water.
Then if it's based on grape juice, coconut water, that's
(10:56):
that's false advertising, that's bull crap, and he.
Speaker 5 (11:00):
Like ed sugar baby.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
Yeah. Jolly's Skin Company said the drink was inspired by
the ancient understanding of water as a symbol of renewal. This,
this is the definition if you ever taken a business class.
Just cook up some bowl you know what, sell it
and yeah, wow, okay, yeah, I don't think I'll be
going back to Arowan, although it was interesting.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
When I walked through, I was like, wow, this is
this is ridiculous.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
David in Central Florida writes, and he's listening, he says,
he listens on WYGM seven forty on the AM dial.
It says, if that makes any difference, not really, not really.
I'm glad that you gave them a plug. Though. That's
great work. Every night last year I hurt my back,
David says, made some progress, but recently I heard it
(11:50):
again and now I have daily insomnia. All that blows
in the early morning, so I end up trying to
fall asleep to your show and it still makes me chuckle.
Wish me luck getting better, and tell your listeners to
take care of their backs. This is hell.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
Absolutely, that's brutal, man.
Speaker 3 (12:09):
You only get one of these things. With these body
things that we have, so it sucks. I feel better. David,
is it lower upper back? Does it matter?
Speaker 5 (12:18):
I don't know, I have lower and yeah it's not great.
Yeah you're a big guy. You're like, can you fix
my back? And like, sure, just lose weight?
Speaker 3 (12:32):
Oh I know, yeah, yeah, yeah, I have a bad knee.
And I go to the checked out.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
I'm like, well, they're just going to tell you to
lose weight. That's what you know.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
That's the first thing they say, right anytime.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
You go in there, lose weight. Okay, thank you.
Speaker 3 (12:47):
I didn't need to go to medical school. I could
have figured that one out.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
Thank you doctor. All right, David, good luck.
Speaker 3 (12:53):
A Willie from Florida writes in The Rather Big State,
will you might want to say what part?
Speaker 1 (13:00):
He says?
Speaker 3 (13:00):
Ben? Do you think Chargers quarterback Justin Herbert is going
to dump his girlfriend for being a failure? And this
is I don't know we mentioned this on the pot.
I'm not sure if we mentioned this or not, but
Justin Herbert's lady friend, Madison Beer, I guess it is
(13:22):
her name, and she's a musician and it was pretty
embarrassing this week. I don't know if someone's out to
get her or what. But she apparently was not able
to sell tickets at the she's on She's been on tour.
She wasn't able to sell tickets. They were saying tickets
were going for the price less than a beer actually
(13:43):
to watch a watch.
Speaker 5 (13:45):
Yeah, yeah, it was a I think you.
Speaker 3 (13:51):
Sent me this too, You did, Robbie right before Will
said you sent this.
Speaker 5 (13:56):
Yes, I was. I was like, malor riddle. Well, maybe
it wouldn't have made it a very good maal riddle,
but it was I had to share it with somebody.
It was a funny headline, but it was also kind
of mean spirited headlines. It was like, whoever was writing
it must have been like jilted by Madison beer in
the past or something.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
You always wonder like somebody's got to get her or
something like that, But I will. Yeah. My favorite one
of those stories is the AI one where some or
not Ai.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
It was TikTok.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
It was some music groups that on TikTok they booked
a bunch of shows to go on tour because they,
according to TikTok, they were unbelievably popular and they couldn't
sell tickets because they were all fake or not all,
but most of them were fake who were following them?
Speaker 1 (14:45):
So that's that.
Speaker 3 (14:46):
Mike from Wisconsin wrights in and says, Ben, do you
think I show Speed the kind of pull to get
India into the next World Cup? And he sent a
story here, this guy who's been.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
All over the World Cup.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
He's being paid, as I understand it, to be a
promoter of the World Cup, and so he's all over
the internet. I show Speed not his real name, by
the way, he was not, but his mom did not
say first name. I said a middle name, show last
name Speed. He just got the name and he was.
He's apparently been offered, according to this guy Mike, to
play soccer for India to try to get to them
(15:26):
in the World Cup in twenty thirty.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
So where is the.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
Where the World Cup is in twenty thirty?
Speaker 1 (15:33):
Do we know what country is to be in.
Speaker 3 (15:38):
That? Oh? Is that they're going to be the one
where they put the clouds the fake clouds? I don't know.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
I have no idea, Robbie, He'll get to that.
Speaker 5 (15:46):
I'm looking as.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
Our live coverage. Robbie the Marina fan is efforting this
right now live on IIF our mail bag the Sunday
mail bag here.
Speaker 5 (16:00):
So the twenty thirty is a combined bid by Morocco
Portugal in Spain. It's the next one, twenty thirty four,
that's in Saudi Arabia.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
Okay, so that so that's still ways away from that one.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Okay, Uh, that'll be well.
Speaker 5 (16:17):
I justed to see how the middle is in twenty
thirty four, you know, yeah, hopefully it's more peaceful than
it is since we started the weed band hip, since
you know what, we want to save the world.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
And then yeah, yeah, ever since we've been it's been
it's been interesting.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
Uh.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
So I show speed. Let's just give India an exemption
if he plays, like is he good at anything?
Speaker 4 (16:47):
Like?
Speaker 3 (16:47):
I don't know. I mean, I just see he's a goofball.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
I see him goofing around. I did.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
He had one of the great bloopers of all time
this week when he was interviewing Jalen Brown and they
were fing around at the game in Foxborough the other
day and Jalen they brought up Lebron's name and then
I show speeds. Oh man, Joel Embiid, I've been paraphrased,
but like Joel Embiid, Jalen Brown, Paul George Lebron and
(17:14):
then Jaylen Brown's well, no he's not there anymore.
Speaker 1 (17:16):
He was like, dude, it's like get traded to the Celtics.
Speaker 5 (17:21):
Yeah. The sports leagues are in just love with that guy.
So I don't know.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
They're a bunch of middle aged and older people that
don't really understand social media. So like, this guy's popular. Okay,
so I'm a lot of money that'll work. Why not?
Speaker 1 (17:41):
Maybe it is working?
Speaker 3 (17:42):
Who knows? Uh? Next up Shane from Nolan's Rights in
He says, Ben, I met you at a meet and
greet in Pittsburgh years ago. I'm sure you don't remember me.
I'm glad you well, uh, he says, are you gonna
have your wife drink Costco coffee now instead of Starbucks?
He says the Costco food Court coffee is just like Starbucks,
(18:08):
but cheaper. Apparently it's been they've been rolling this out
at stores across the United States. They can't believe it's
half the price of the star wars. Well, I don't
know about that, Shane in nor Leans, but I will
tell you my wife is a big fan of the
(18:28):
I don't drink coffee. My wife loves the Starbucks those
frozen not frozen. They're the metal cans, kind of silver cans.
The Starbucks they sell at the store, which is Kirkland brand.
It's like a ripoff of Starbucks that it's a a
big fan of that. So yeah, doesn't do anything. Yeah,
if she wants it, not going for that. You know
(18:52):
what else? I'd like to see the chicken figures, but
I understand they don't haven't gotten out here and they
don't have the fries like in Vancouver. So I think
I'm good on that. Dwight from Boston writes, and he says, Ben,
a university in California is offering to give a scholarship
if you can complete all one hundred and fifteen levels
of Minecraft? Does that really count at higher education? Asking
(19:16):
for a friend that's from Dwight in Boston. I have
never played Minecraft, so I don't know what one hundred
and fifteen advance advancements is. I guess that's a big thing.
Speaker 5 (19:27):
I'm very confused at that. I thought Minecraft was like
to build your own worlds in Minecraft.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
I'm that I don't know, Yeah, says Universe.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Here's the other giveaway.
Speaker 3 (19:38):
Dwight sent a story here, Robbie, it's University of Silicon Valley.
I don't know, is that an online thing or something
I've never heard of that.
Speaker 5 (19:47):
I've never heard of it, but I assume it has
it's a video game like degree course or something else.
I don't know. It's great promotion for them, Like I mean,
it sounds so wacky, but you've never heard of the
now you have, so guess good marketing on their part.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Is there mascot like an iPhone or something like that?
Would that be their masks? How about the Mariners? Man,
bad news for Robbie the Mariner. You see they got
sold to the guy from Sun Systems. I guess over
the weekend. It was announced yesterday his wife is going
to run the team. And that sounds like it's like
(20:26):
a debacle. That does not sound like that's going to
end well for the Seattle Seahawks in terms of ownership there.
We'll see how that goes, Trucker Joe writes in He says, Benny,
it has been a long time, a long ass time
since I asked a question, pretty much since Gagon was
on the podcast.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Well that's like two podcasts co people ago. Because we've
got bre helping.
Speaker 3 (20:46):
Us nowt now and we had Danny g before he quit.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
He was with us for a long time.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
Anyway, says my question is a bit morbid, But I'm curious,
the day you just check out of this world, will
your funeral or viewing be open to the militia? If no?
For if not for all who out of the Mallard
militia will be allowed? Thanks in advanced thats trucker show. Well,
how do you know your How do you know I'm gonna.
Speaker 1 (21:11):
Check out before you? Trucker Joe.
Speaker 3 (21:13):
You don't know that yet?
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Who knows?
Speaker 3 (21:18):
We never know. That's the beauty of life. You don't
know when you're gonna gonna exit, So uh no, I
I know someone else. As my dad said before he
checked out, that's your problem, son. Uh well, that's your problem.
I'm dead.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
You'll have to deal with that because I.
Speaker 3 (21:34):
Won't be here anymore. I'll be gone, so someone else
can worry about it.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
Orbit Trucker Shoe.
Speaker 5 (21:42):
If you want top it. It's a great It's on
the theme in a group manless your group chat. I've
been in for like eight years now. We jokingly said
one time that the only time we'll ever all actually
meet up is what us?
Speaker 6 (21:57):
Oh yeah, checks out. Yeah, that's fortunately, that's hugely.
Speaker 5 (22:11):
And I'm like, you know what, that's horrible.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
It's almost as bad as action, Robbie.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
I don't know what's going on, but you said.
Speaker 3 (22:19):
A little little Darth Vader.
Speaker 1 (22:26):
I don't know what's going on.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
It might be maybe some mine, probably.
Speaker 4 (22:31):
Not really.
Speaker 5 (22:35):
For me to even come back. I don't know what's
going on, Toma, little line.
Speaker 3 (22:41):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
It's a podcast.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
What are we gonna do? Truck Joe. Also, since I'm
still stuck here in nowhere uncle waiting on that airport
to be built, he says, all right, well, good luck,
good luck on that.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
We're really screwed.
Speaker 3 (23:06):
When they build that airport.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
We can't give those trips away anymore.
Speaker 3 (23:09):
I mean, that's it. Can't go can't go to nowhere
if there's an airport there, and then you can go
to nowhere and then we're there. Were in some trouble.
Corbin in the Bay Rights in the Bay Area says,
did you hear they had a fake homeless encampment here
in San Francisco And it was actually the set for
a Netflix movie they're making. And people have been freaking
(23:32):
out calling the police and it's all just for a
Netflix show. And that's from Corbin.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
In the Bay.
Speaker 3 (23:40):
I did see that headline, Corbin about the homeless thing.
The funny thing is I saw a photo of it
and it looked much cleaner than the actual homeless places
I've seen when I've traveled around San Francisco. I don't
go there that often, but I was just there in
February for the Super Bowl and traveling around seeing the
(24:01):
actual Sodom and Gomorra better knowing as the Tenderloin District.
H This this version was much cleaner, much much cleaner.
And and do they really need to make that for
a movie? Can't they just go film at the real
the real place.
Speaker 1 (24:19):
I don't know, so who knows.
Speaker 5 (24:22):
Yeah, Portland's kind of crazy too with that.
Speaker 3 (24:26):
So oh yeah. They're up and down the West coast
from Mahico to Canada. And even in Canada, there's some
spots in Vancouver. As my Manniko knows, that not the
prettiest place, not.
Speaker 5 (24:40):
The pretty anymore. It's almost a good idea to walk
around in narcan just in case you walk into a
fentanyl plot. When you're going on walks that happened to
a friend of mine the other day.
Speaker 3 (24:50):
So wow, that's a great testimonial. At some point somebody
narb Yeah, yeah, it's all like a pepper spray. How
about a two from and cumbo pepper spray and then
narcan boom done right there? Yeah? Yeah, you get attacked
and you spray the pepper spray and then if you
get the fentanyl, you just take that. Boom.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
You're good.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
What else? Alf from the Guinness Book of World Records.
He says, good day, Ben and friends of the podcast. Ben,
what are you planning to do with your extra segment
on Monday show that will replace Mallard of the third degree?
Seeing that you made history by passing Monday on a Friday?
(25:34):
Except from Alf? Yeah, well, Alf, what are the chances
that Coop will remember that he already passed me? And
what I should do is I imagine he'll actually ask questions,
So I should just be like, well, I'm not answering,
I'm not answering that I'm not and then he'll get
pissed and I'll say, well, you can't fail me because
I already and I already won. So that's that's it. Yeah,
(25:58):
I don't know Let's take take call from James talking
about God only knows what next? Up? What do we got?
Let's see here he says, Hey, big Ben and a
special guest. I think this is from the couple our
friend John and Joanna from the San Gabriel Valley. They
wrote in Big Ben and Special Guest, we have a
(26:19):
cat named Peta. It is an acronym for pain in
the Oh.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
That's good.
Speaker 3 (26:25):
I like that anyways. Loves the taste of salmon, but
doesn't like salmon doesn't like her, leaving us to clean
up quite the mess. Our question this week is there
a certain flavor of food or treats that does the
same to Moxie. Obviously pumpkin is ruled out. We all
(26:48):
know what happened when Moxy had Pumpkin. But maybe something
else that doesn't agree with your beloved dog MAXI has
been pretty good like in terms of what she actually loves.
It's pretty funny. I was at Costco a couple of
years ago and they had the dog treats and they
had a bulldog, an English bulldog on the box, and
(27:10):
I was like, hey, we got an English bulldog. I
wonder if Moxy all like these freaking loves those treats,
loves those treats, but doesn't really mess her up. The
food that messes Moxy up if there's a proper mix.
You know how they say, Robbie, you're not supposed to
give your dog leftovers like because it's not good for them.
But occasionally I will give the dog leftover food. If
(27:31):
I don't finish my food, I'll just and I have
noticed that the proper mix of cheeses just the right
there's a certain mix that will not hit Moxie the
right way and will cause a tremendous dissatisfaction to Moxie.
And obviously, the main issue that we have, and there's.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
Really no way around it.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
If you've ever had an English bulldog, John and Joanna
is the tooting, the farting is out of control. So
we try to try to limit certain foods for that.
You got any pets, Robbie, anything any pet related issues there? No,
you're good.
Speaker 5 (28:12):
My parents have a cat that I helped administer their
food or their medicine too, and it's getting older, and
it's a liquid medicine. You have to shoot down your
throat once a day, and it's it's not a fun ordeal.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
That sounds terrible.
Speaker 3 (28:28):
Yeah, well I've had like the cool the pills are
not bad because what you do, I've had this. You
just wrap it like in a piece of pepperoni or
something like that, and they'll eat the pepperoni.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
Then we realize eating the pill.
Speaker 3 (28:40):
If you have to spray something down the throat though,
that's man.
Speaker 5 (28:45):
Yeah, there's the one good side is obviously if you
can get it down it, it can't spit up. Because
we do have a cat that will dumb there. We
have another cat that my my dad will only that
my dad is allowed to put that one the pill
in the cat's throat, or she'll freak out for anyone else.
(29:05):
But she sometimes will just keep it in her mouth
and then spit it out when no one's looking.
Speaker 3 (29:10):
So niky a little devil, Yeah, exactly, all right, what
else did we have us to hear? Quang from Ho
Chim in Vietnam guaranteed human. By the way, Kwang, you
really made weed man smile when you said we should
get rid of his segment and make it all about Lisa.
He seemed to enjoy that, which I didn't think you
(29:31):
would enjoy anyway, Quank says believe it or not. The
raw chemical element that makes up the average one hundred
and fifty four pounds adult human.
Speaker 1 (29:40):
Bye, really average humans one hundred ft four pounds.
Speaker 3 (29:42):
I guess we're most mostly oxygen, carbon, hydrogen, nitrogen, calcium,
and phosphorus have a total market value of about five
hundred to fifteen hundred dollars. So at your heaviest band,
what do you think you're body was? Well, let me all,
(30:04):
I say, so this requires mal math, so I'm gonna
have to go to the calculator. Here.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
Hold on, So one.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Hundred and fifty four is one hundred and fifty four
pound human. So let's see here, hold on a secure
get the math out. So I was at least I
would say, let me see.
Speaker 4 (30:28):
Here, do do do?
Speaker 6 (30:31):
Do?
Speaker 3 (30:31):
Do?
Speaker 1 (30:32):
All right?
Speaker 3 (30:32):
So then you do the math on that, and then see.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
I should clear this out.
Speaker 3 (30:36):
Here we go. I got this all right, So then
times three, I think I was over four thousand dollars
in value.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
I was a value person. Quang, I'm like, big money.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
How do you get all that out?
Speaker 1 (30:50):
Though?
Speaker 3 (30:50):
The oxygen, the carbon, the hydrogen, the nitrogen, the othrus,
uh all kind.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
Of goes away.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
It all just goes away evaporates. Max from Florida wrights
in on the mail bag. He says, Ben, you and
the mal Or Militia should set a Guinness World record
like Pitbull did over the weekend. Have you thought about
doing this would be a great bit for the show. Thanks,
love you, Max from South Florida. Yeah, we have thought
(31:20):
about it, Max, I don't know how long you've been
listening to the show. By the way, Robbie, he says
that Pitbull set the Guinness World Record for the largest
gathering of people wearing bald caps twenty two forty one people.
This is in London. I guess over the weekend had
some British summer festival thing. Yeah, so Max, years and
(31:44):
years ago. This goes back, Man, might even go back
twenty years. I reached out to the people at Guinness.
I had an idea to set a record for the
most phone calls taken on a talk radio show in
one hour.
Speaker 1 (31:58):
I thought, well, that would be easy. I'll just keep
taking calls.
Speaker 3 (32:01):
Why not? How hard could that be? What qualifies for
a call? So I reached out to them and they
eventually took them a while to get back.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
They wrote back to.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
Me and then we're in an email chain. And then
I told them my idea and they were very receptive
to it. And then they told me how much it
was going to cost to it to do it, and
I was like, well, I'm good. So what they do,
Robbie and I don't know if they still do this,
but back then, years ago, in order to do this
you have to pay them.
Speaker 1 (32:28):
There's a fee.
Speaker 3 (32:29):
And then if I remember correctly, and I might have
this part wrong, I think you also had to cover
for a representative of the Guinness people to show up
because they have to have someone there wearing the jacket
with the thing.
Speaker 1 (32:42):
So it's it's a pretty pricey deal.
Speaker 3 (32:46):
Don't just do it? They were, you know, because they're
they're a for profit business.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
They're not a charity. So I don't have that kind
of scratch.
Speaker 3 (32:54):
Now, if somebody wants to put their money together in
the Mallard Militia, if you guys think it would be
a good bit for the show, I'd be more more
than happy to to do something like that.
Speaker 1 (33:04):
But it was just not feasible.
Speaker 3 (33:06):
I was doing weekends at the time, too, so it
was like, might make sense, Uh, it'll be fun to
have fun little thing to say, Hey, we have the
Guinness Book of World Records. It's just not it's not
a endeavor.
Speaker 5 (33:20):
So good marketing opportunity, I guess. But yeah, that is
the thing people don't realize, Like you said, it's the
for profit business. For some reason. You hear get world
records and they have all officially. You think it's like
an NGO or you know, some sort of like un
organization or something. But no, it's definitely not.
Speaker 3 (33:41):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (33:42):
Next up on the mail bag we have Luke. It'll
force be with you, Luke.
Speaker 3 (33:48):
Uh, it says Ben and Mystery Podcast mail bag friend.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
That'd be Robbie the Mariner fan.
Speaker 3 (33:53):
Luke. Do you support DNA testing for dog poop? He?
He says, there's a big building in Vancouver. By the way,
Luke did not say where he's from, so I don't
know if he's from Vancouver or not. Anyway, Luke says
there's a condo building in Vancouver that uses DNA testing
to solve the question who didn't pick up after their dog?
(34:16):
If you want to live in this building, you have
to register your dog. You have to give a cheek
swab DNA test seventy five dollars fee paid by the
owner to the management of the condo building, and then
anytime they find dog poo around the condo building, they
send it to a lab to have it tested and
(34:36):
they find whoever, whoever's.
Speaker 1 (34:39):
Dog did the do do so this.
Speaker 3 (34:42):
I don't think this is new, by the way, I
feel like this.
Speaker 5 (34:44):
Is no I've heard of something like this.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
Yeah, I don't think this is new.
Speaker 3 (34:47):
And I don't is that that necessary? I mean, you
should clean up after your dog. Do you really want
to live in a police state where they have the DNA?
Speaker 1 (34:56):
It seems a little I don't mont.
Speaker 5 (34:58):
I will say the crazy some of the crazier neighbor
interactions I've ever had and ever seen involved just taking
a dog for a walk and having them not even poop,
but like go pee on a bush that's connected to
the sidewalk. I mean, people get so up, but it
be about their yards, Like you gotta walk your dog somewhere,
you know. Yeah, there's been neighbors that have called the
(35:19):
cops on other neighbors because they they're like convinced their
dog they're having their dog only pee on their bushes
instead of like dispersing it in an even race or something,
and it's it's it's wild. Just some people just do
not like animals. And uh yeah, So I honestly I
see that it's an overreaction, but I see what probably
(35:42):
led that place to do that.
Speaker 1 (35:44):
That's a little much.
Speaker 3 (35:45):
I I have on the front occasionally gone out shopping
to the front of the house, and I'll come home
and there are a lot of people in our neighborhood
walk dogs or whatever, so and I'll see a dog
on our lawn, you know, and I yeah, but uh
and then immediately they'll see me pull up into the
like pull the dog leash, you know, try to get
the dog. I do give him the evil eye, but
(36:08):
I'm not doing DNA testing, you know.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
I'm like evil eye. But that's it. I don't go
beyond that.
Speaker 5 (36:13):
So who's the poor a hole that has to like
pick it up too and then send it off. It
doesn't seem fun if that's like the city job where
you just get called all day to pick up dog
boop to have it set off to a lab.
Speaker 3 (36:27):
But Nolan from the Valley of the Sun rites in
on the mail bag. He says, hey, Ben, good idea
or bad idea? A museum covered its floor with enough
peanut butter to make fifteen thousand sandwiches to honor. It
was an artist that died. I guess a tribute to
a Dutch artist. I have no idea who this person is.
(36:48):
They used over eight hundred pounds of peanut butter a
museum in Rotterdam.
Speaker 1 (36:54):
I don't even know where that is.
Speaker 3 (36:56):
I'm gonna go.
Speaker 1 (36:58):
Bad idea how about that? I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (37:00):
This guy must have loved peanut butter. He must have
been all about the peanut butter. I don't know.
Speaker 5 (37:05):
I've had to completely take peanut butter out of my diet.
It's gonna lose weight. So yeah, peanut butter is a
it's an amazing thing.
Speaker 3 (37:13):
But you know, yeah, that sounds like when I worked
with Looney and I used to We used to get
up early on Sunday to do the Blitz and I'd
come in there with a big coup of orange juice.
I loved orange juice, and every week Looney would bitch
at me, eat the orange, don't drink the juice. You're
drinking thirty five oranges.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
I'm like, oh God, leave me.
Speaker 3 (37:31):
Alone, dude.
Speaker 5 (37:33):
I know the sad factcause he's probably he's right, but yeah,
no one wants to hear it.
Speaker 3 (37:38):
He is, he is, you know, it's it's true.
Speaker 1 (37:41):
All right, what else we got to get out of here?
We get any more that seem good?
Speaker 3 (37:49):
I don't know I got and they all seem okay, Robbie,
But uh, all right, how about this, Well we'll get
out on this. Trevor in Texas rights and he says, Ben,
you got to come visit town, do a mala meat
and greet, and you can get cheap cheeseburgers. According to
the Cheeseburger Index. The f is that cheeseburger Index. The
(38:12):
comfort food a cheeseburger, fries and a soda classic American
comfort food. A new Door Dash report says the cheapest
comfort food in America is in that meal cheeseburger, fries
and soda in Austin, Texas, Robbi, you can get that
(38:35):
for twelve ninety four. The average price of that meal
is twelve ninety four, lowest in America. They said. The
lowest prices are in the South and Southeast. Most affordable
the most expensive. You want to take a shot, Robbie.
The most expensive classic American food according to the Cheeseburger Index.
Speaker 5 (38:55):
Yeah, I would. This isn't going to be a California, No,
believe it. Why, Oh, that's actually shocking to me.
Speaker 3 (39:03):
Well, it's not when you realize where it is. Think
about now, it's oh Hawaii. Now close another state that's
not connected directly to Alaska, Alaska, Anchorage, Alaska. That same
meal that is twelve dollars and ninety four cents in Austin,
Texas will cost you twenty eight dollars and twenty eight cents.
(39:24):
Oh my, that's outrageous, even for the cheeseburger index. That's
not right, Robie.
Speaker 1 (39:30):
That's a lot of that's a lot of cash.
Speaker 5 (39:32):
You know, if you're addicted to cheeseburgers. At one point,
I at one point I may have been maybe I
should have moved to Alaska and I would have dropped
the sixty pounds a little bit quicker.
Speaker 3 (39:43):
But up been there. Let's see here, four cities in
the lone Star state made the list. Laredo, Texas thirteen
thirty nine. Lincoln, Nebraska was on there. Detroit, how about Detroit? Philadelphia? Also,
that's for the affordable part. The affordable part stretch things
on the cheeseburger index. So thanks to Trevor in I'd
(40:08):
love to do it. Be great. You know, it's weird.
I don't know. We have a lot of listeners in texts.
I get a lot of email from people in Texas.
We don't have too many callers from Texas. It's odd.
I don't know why that is. I mean, we have
a few, it's it's a huge state.
Speaker 5 (40:21):
Yeah, that's actually a good point. I what happened to that?
There used to be this very curmudgety guy that lived
in like San Antonio that I played an amount of
money once on the show before you went on your
Christmas vacation and we went. We had like a zero
zero tie. I forget his name, but he stopped calling.
Speaker 6 (40:40):
Was that.
Speaker 3 (40:40):
Yeah, we had a couple guys in San Antonio that
would call. There was one who would give quotes poetry guy.
Uh yeah, I don't know. I don't know what happened
to these guys. They come in.
Speaker 5 (40:51):
Carly and San Antonio is still alive, if you want
to know. He texted me the other day. He's just
got kids now and he's like an actual adult, so.
Speaker 3 (40:59):
He's all up. Yeah. Remember we had Alice, That kid
called her for a while. He called up.
Speaker 5 (41:05):
I'll never forget where I was the night he called up.
Remember when he called up and You're like, are you
in the bathroom? And he's like no, And then you
heard the toilet flush. I was about to get on
a plane from Denver to Portland and I was listening
on iHeartRadio app and I start burst out laughing, and
I'm lucky I didn't get like red flak. I'm getting
on the plane because I kind of forgot where it was.
(41:28):
In that moment, I was just like, it was so funny,
and it took I snapped back around. There's about a
hundred people looking at you right now, probably looking like
you're a lunatic.
Speaker 1 (41:37):
And I was like, oh, sorry, that's great.
Speaker 3 (41:39):
Yeah, well, my well the kid remember the kid in
the bay a we had We took down Justin.
Speaker 5 (41:45):
Well and Justin's defence Coop did the math wrong. Justin
actually won. But yes, it was a close fight. Yeah,
but I remember that.
Speaker 3 (41:53):
Yeah, that that kid's probably all growing up now too, right,
It's yeah, that's.
Speaker 1 (41:59):
Maggie killed me. That this little girl all.
Speaker 3 (42:01):
Up and go to hell Lebron James.
Speaker 1 (42:04):
And she's like grown up. I think she's got kids.
Speaker 3 (42:06):
It's freaking crazy. How fast that? All right? We'll get
out on that. Thank you, Robbie, appreciate it, and I'll
be back tonight. Should be a normal week, no days off,
no days off, so I'll be in the his and
we got to Benny the big award show. When I
award show, it's the Mallard Palooza, so we will be
(42:27):
awarding a winner of the Malord Palooza. That'll be coming
up Wednesday and the Thursday.
Speaker 1 (42:32):
Look forward to that.
Speaker 3 (42:33):
And until then, anything you want to promote, Robbie, by
the way, anything you want to.
Speaker 5 (42:39):
I would like to not promote my connection. Whatever happened
tonight was not great. But you know, the show I
do with Thosy Guy on Sunday Mornings is still going
the United States of Australia on YouTube. So that's something
we can check out if you want to sell it.
Speaker 3 (42:55):
Robbie, I'm on the greatest YouTube show in the world.
It's only one day a week, it's it's international, it's amazing,
it's life changing. I gotta teach you how to be
a salesman, Robbie. You gotta know.
Speaker 5 (43:08):
I you know, usually I'm pretty good as that. I'm
just so rattled. I feel terrible. I just know the
about the amount of crap I want to get from
people who listen to this and shoot shoot something. My
way to say, hey, your connection was great, ahole, but yeah.
Speaker 3 (43:26):
Will not at all be rude or Justin or any
of those guys at all. All Right, anyway, I have
a wonderful, wonderful rest of your Sunday and I will
chat with you all tonight. Uh well, you late on
the overnight and we have fresh pods next week as well.
See you that my flation
Host
Ben Maller
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