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July 9, 2022 43 mins

Ben Maller and his 5th Hour partner Danny G. have a fun Saturday ready to go for you! They talk Chestnut suplex, 'rubbing shoulders', Ram It All Night, Daisy Carnival, back scratcher and more! 

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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Kaboom. If you thought four hours a day, minutes a
week was enough, I think again. He's the last remnants
of the old Republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He
treats crackheads in the ghetto Cutter the same as the
rich pill poppers in the penthouse the Clearinghouse of Hot
takes break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with

(00:23):
Ben Maller starts right now in the air everywhere in
a very good Saturday to you. It is another addition
of the Fifth Hour with Ben Mallard and Danny G Radio.
As we are bleary Eye, but here the podcast game

(00:47):
does not end. The grind. We are in the audio
salt mind, Danny G. That's what we are right now.
We're in a haze. Both of us are in the haze.
I don't know what day it is, really, I just
said Saturday. I don't know if it's Saturday. It's It's
been crazy this time of the year, has it not?
It really has been. And I have a long weekend
ahead of me with podcasting and the live shows at

(01:09):
the FSR studios. But you know, you had a long,
long work week when that seems like a minimum day
and you're looking forward to that schedule. Yeah, and I
don't know what it is. Maybe it's July, the holiday,
July four and all that. But it's just been one
thing after another. I've had meetings, I've had to deal

(01:30):
with some some bull pucky as Jay Scoop, our buddy
in Seattle likes to say, and uh, it's like one
thing after another, what do you want from me? A
lot a lot of villain shifts. Man. This is the
time of the year where a lot of talking heads
take time off, not us, but other talking heads. Yeah. Yeah,

(01:50):
well I'm neurotic. If I wasn't neurotic, I would take
a lot of time off. But I I've told the
story before, but when I was at the mighty six
ninety as an intern, and every time it felt like,
I'm sure I wasn't right on this. It just felt
like this when you're a young guy, and it felt

(02:11):
like every time somebody took an extended vacation, they never
came back from vacation. They just get fired. And so
I was programmed, like Pavlov dogs, you shouldn't take any
time off. And I do believe that in what we do, Nanny,
it is repetition. It is you have to be there,
whether people listen or not. It's it's kind of like

(02:33):
the sofa in your living room. You might not sit
on the sofa every day, but you want to have
the opportunities on the sofa. You want to know it's there,
and so I believe in that, but you do you
don't have to balance it a little bit. Yeah, it's
you can't be all in and everything. You gotta take
occasional days off and whatnot. But these are first world

(02:53):
props for sure. There are a lot of sofas waiting
in line, though, to replace the sofa in your living room. Yeah,
well that is a that is a fair point. That
is a fair point. So on this podcast we have
Rubbing Shoulders, Rammed All Night, Daisy Carnival, Backscratcher, and we
may have time for some other things. But I do

(03:15):
not want to promise and then not deliver. My ass
feels so good right now, Rubbing Shoulders. Now, I saved
a lot of this content for the Saturday podcast Danny
The Life of Mallard and Danny g Podcast. So let
me get right into it. Don't bury the lead, my man. Uh,

(03:35):
some details of last week. What a great weekend that
was one of my favorite weeks. We had Joey Chestnut,
and I remember telling you, Danny's I gotta get Joey Chestnut.
We gotta get this guy on the podcast. I want
to talk to. Joey Chestnut is one of my favorite athletes,
and you were able to track him down and book him.
Good job by you, and and Joy was wonderful. And

(03:56):
that got a lot of attraction. So that was always good.
I just whether anybody liked it or not, I wanted
to talk to me. That was one of those podcasts.
I don't care if anyone enjoyed it or not. I
just wanted to talk to Joey Chestern and so it
was cool to talk to him. And I feel like
we're best friends now. I feel like we bonded. Me
and Joey Chester. We're both introverts. Back in my younger days,
I used to eat a lot like Joey chest Not

(04:17):
not so much anymore. Like you can both eat at
least five chicken tenders. Yes, I can eat a Kenya combo,
which is six pieces of chicken fries and a piece
of bread, no extra fries, no coaslaw at raising Kanes.
That's what I get. He eats fifty, you eat five
or six, But yeah, lots of downloads, Thank you for that.

(04:40):
And then the event, I wish they hadn't cut out
the part where he's suplexed the protester on the actual
broadcast that me and Tender only watched Ben they cut
it out. Yeah, that's not right censorship, And there was
something I've seen about that at all. And I think
the biggest mistake the protester made was he used a

(05:01):
cheap Darth Vader mask. What's up with that? He's one
of those with a plastic string on the back. Go
out and spend some money. You can get a really
nice Darth Vader mask if you want. They're expensive, but
you can go all in on that and knock yourself out.
But Joy made us proud. A lot of these trolls, Danny,
a lot of these morons see like to bust my
balls and the Malley Militia. They were like, oh no, yeah,

(05:24):
your jig said the Curse of the Benbito Chestnut's gonna
choke on a on a wiener and he's not gonna
win and all this stuff, And I'm like, come on, man,
there's no curse to the band. How many times do
I have to say there's no curse to the Rams
are the reigning Super Bowl champs, Dodgers won the hardest
World Series of all time, Clippers were in the final four.

(05:45):
It's all that's old news. You're doing old material. If
you say there's a curse of the ben Bino, so
put a sock in it. Okay, I will admit that
this time there was no curse because not only was
he able to still get to sixty three body slammed
the protester and then kept going with one arm eating
a dog and bun, and then the other puts that

(06:08):
he's like a superhero, puts the guy in a chokehold.
This is what Batman would do. This is what Superman
or spider Man would and it's chowey chest that a
guy that he eats wieners for a living. That's that's
what he's doing. Uh, just just outstanding. There were lots
of arguments come Tuesday morning all across the country on

(06:28):
whether or not it's a sport. We've already determined it's
a sport. You're testing the body, the limits of the body,
and not everyone can do it. It takes practice. Chestnuts
spends months to get ready for this thing. There's danger.
You could die if you choke on a hot dog.

(06:48):
You've got limits. It's he's like a daredevil. He's a
modern day evil Kinevil, Joey Chestnut and uh and so
it was. It was. It was cool to watch all that.
But even before that, before that, The Life of Mallard
m a p one friend of the show. I got
a text last week. Hey, it's it's Lawrence, better known

(07:14):
by his superhero name Marlin's Man. He says, Hey, I'm
heading to Los Angeles for the Dodgers and the Padres.
It's a big series. I would love to have you
as my guest. At this point, it's my wife's birthday weekend.
We had talked about this, Danny, So I had made
plans with my wife and more on that in a minute.

(07:36):
Wait till you hear how that went. You talk about romance.
Oh boy, So I said, maybe Saturday. I got plans
on Friday, but maybe Saturday I can get her to
agree to it. And he's, okay, let me know. And
so then I asked her and she was kind of like,
you know, are these good seats? I said, these are
You'll never sit in these seats. These are the greatest

(07:57):
seats of all time. Uh, you can't get better. See
the only better scene is if you're in the dugout.
Okay that the seats are amazing. And so she said, okay,
all right, you know, and she she didn't want to
meet Marlin's man. I had told her some stories of
the past, so she agreed to it. So then I
text Marlin's Man back. I said, I can't do Friday,

(08:17):
but I can do. I decide. I told you I
can do, said it. So he's okay, no problem. So
we we agreed. The game was like a four o'clock
star at l A time, Dodgers Padres big game. It
was on Fox. So then I'm waiting for him to
send me the tickets were in l A. We drove
from the north Woods into l A. I'm waiting for
him to send the ticket. Oh my god, calamity. The
MLB app, which is how you get into the stadium,

(08:40):
crashed for Marlin's Man, so he's in scrambled movies. I
can't send you the tickets. The app crashed. I said,
what are you talking about? The app? Right? What are
you talking? So he give me the whole story. He
gets on the horn. This is how powerful this guy,
Marlin's Man is. He gets on the horn within an hour.
We're actually within about fifteen twenty minutes. He's on the
phone with a senior vice president of Major League Baseball.

(09:04):
He's on the phone with the ticket broker of Major
League Baseball, like the head people. And this one guys
at a barbecue in New York, one of the big
shots who runs the ticketing for Major League Baseball, and
he's on the phone with Marlin's Man, and they're figuring
out a solution. And so finally Lawrence sends me a
Texas says, no, I got it worked out. I'm gonna

(09:25):
send you the tickets, And so I knew they would
be good seats because I've been to a few games
with Marlin's Man, Danny, But these were primo seats. These
are unreal. It was the third row right behind the
catcher's dairy air and the umpire right there, third directly
behind the catcher and right in the line of fire

(09:50):
from the center field camera, right right there. Yeah, your
face was next to the Fox logo. You know, it's
your dick this And I'm like, oh no, and so well,
I was okay, I was like, I think we'll be
on TV. So I wasn't sure. You don't know for
sure because you're not like where exactly the cameras pointed,
but I'll probably on the TV. My wife I don't

(10:12):
want to be at So I made a deal with it.
I said, Okay, I'm not gonna tweet out anything. I'm
not gonna promote it on social media that I'm right
behind and play. I'll send something out after the game,
but I'm not gonna send anything out during the game.
Because she was a little uncomfortable with that, I said, okay,
so I didn't. I didn't sendything out to you know.
During the game was going on. I text a few people,

(10:35):
I say, you're not gonna believe this whatever I'm here,
blah blah blah blah blah. And so then in the
I think it was the bottom of the or in
between the top and the bottom of the first inning,
Marlin's man sending me screenshots, Hey You're on TV. But
even before that, we I mean, the whole experience down there,

(10:56):
it's it's it's how the one percenters live. I don't
get to live that life. Nanny I'm I'm on an
overnight radio budget. I can't afford to live that life.
These these tickets are like six eight dollars. It's it's unbelievable.
But a very nice time there. It was great. First
classes were all the Hollywood muckety MUCKs and the big

(11:18):
the big shots all hang out, the big cahunas hang
out in the they called the Yama Va dugout club.
Your own waiter and waitress. Yeah, it's wild, and I
was a little uncomfortable how I felt like I had
Alfred the Butler looking after me and like in the
bat cave or something like that. But uh yeah, big shots,

(11:38):
a lot of mogs, movers and shakers and entertainment there.
They all schmooze. They're all hanging out there, and the
uppercross the big Hollywood deals get done rubbing shoulders. I
really was rubbing shoulders with very popular people, and I
felt like a fish out of water, like I didn't.
I didn't like the pregame meal the way this works.
If you've never been to one something like this, at

(12:00):
least a Dodger stadium, So the pregame meal, you get there,
there's this amazing, lavish, massive club right under the stands,
and it's high end food, Prime rib, exotic omelets. They
had seafood, and it's just piled up everywhere. It's just
piled up all over the plan. Massive piles are really

(12:22):
high quality food, and I don't I don't really like
high quality food. Danny, you eat like a twelve year old. Yeah,
so this is completely wasted on me. My palette is
that of an eight year old. There's something like that.
So so I'm trying to find stuff that I can eat. You.

(12:43):
I don't really like the high end stuff. So I
ended up for my pregame meal, I had a plate
of mashed potatoes and gravy. Can't go wrong with mashed
potatoes and gravy. I had some bread that was pretty good,
and they had a chicken sausage thing that I had,
which was not bad. Head but I wanted to pace myself.
I figured a lot of time here. I want to

(13:06):
pace myself now. I did want to also mention I
had a very awkward moment in this dugout club while
I was getting food, and I don't go to these
games that much anymore. Most of my friends who are
in the media that I knew when I was going
every day are either retired, dead, whatever, So I don't
know too many. I feel friendly faces, I know, but

(13:28):
I don't go out there that much anymore because I'm
in the studio and do the show half the time
from home and all that wather. So I'm getting some
mashed potatoes and I run into somebody. I'm like, oh crap,
Oh he recognizes me and I recognize him, you know,
and it's one of those moments, like God, j T

(13:48):
the brick. Yeah. So I'm like, I I had this,
this come to Jesus. I gotta say hello to the guy.
I can't be an asshole, you know. I I'm not social,
but I have to be polite to the guy. This
is a very important person in so I did. I said, Hey,
how you doing? Uh? And this guy, the guy that
I ran into, was the number two guy at the

(14:09):
Scott Borros Agency, most powerful man in baseball, more powerful
than Rob Manford Scott Boors. And this is not Scott Boris,
this is his number two guy. He recognized me. We
made eye contact, and the guy gave me the what
the f are you doing here? Look? Not not a
mean way, And I want to say it was a

(14:30):
mean way, but it was one of those things like
it was. It was the kind of vibe like, hey,
you're a media guy, you're a radio guy, this is
my domain, Like what are you doing here? You know
that kind of thing, which was not wrong. I didn't
belong there, um, but we exchanged niceties. I I asked,
I know Scott Boris back in the day. I've actually

(14:53):
tried to get him on the podcast. He is, I
guess turned this down. But anyway, I I asked if
Scott was at the game. He told me no, Uh,
Scott was attending to a personal matter and all that.
But we had a brief conversation and he went his
way and I took my mashed potatoes in my gravy,
and I grabbed some biscuits and that was it. We
went and turning, turning the page from that. Uh so

(15:15):
the so the game begins. I'm going blow by blow.
This is a Brewder film coverage, Danny. Any questions feel
free to ask. So the game begins. We head out
to our seats, me and the the misses, and on
the way out they have a table filled with bags

(15:35):
of peanuts, popcorn, cracker Jack's. There were some other healthier snacks,
but who wants to eat those? They had two massive
coolers filled with water bottles. Help yourself as much as
you want. So I, of course immediately start grabbing cracker
Jack's and peanuts, and I'm like, oh great, this is mine.
This is my kind of food. All right, I'm gonna
go for that. So I grabbed a bunch of that.

(15:57):
And then they you get to your seat, eat and
they have a menu. So you've already eat your pregame.
You know, You've already got your cracker jacks, your peanuts
or popcorn and all that stuff. So now they have
a menu. So this is the next layer of food
then and the this is my kind of food. And
this is in my wheelhouse ballpark food with waiters service.

(16:18):
Now I can get my own food, but they don't
let you. They don't let you get your own food.
They have whatever you want. Just ask your waiter. You
have your personal waiter and and they'll get you. Uh.
I have the menu. You want to hear what's on
the menu for these? All right? So the rich people
in this dugout club at Dodger Stadium, they have the

(16:39):
actual menu. We have the Dodger Dog Brooklyn Dodgers. What
is a Brooklyn Dodger Doug kosher? Is it? I don't
know it? Says Brooklyn Dodger Dog. Maybe it's actually cooked
all the way through. I'm like the usual Dodger dug.
Don't I'm kidding. I'm kidding plant based Dodger dog. Who
wants to eat that plant? They had chicken tenders with fries.

(17:00):
Now is that not? Is that not? Got my name
all over it? They should name that item after you. Actually. Yeah.
So they have garlic fries, nachos, seasonal fruit cup. Yeah,
that's always a rip. Yeah, a seasonal veggie cup. They
have a bunch of snacks, something called clean snack. I

(17:23):
don't know what that is. I mentioned peanuts, popcorn and
gluten free chips, soft pretzel with cheese sauce. Hello. They
said a sort of coke products, bottled water. As we mentioned,
all of the food items complimentary as much as you want.
The only caveat last call for food top of the

(17:48):
seventh inning, so you had to get it all in
by the top of the seventh inning. And and then
they also had alcohol, but the alcohol was not free.
The booze was not free. The price range was if
you wanted a bud zero seven bucks for a glass
of wine, twenty four dollars for a glass of wine. Yeah,

(18:09):
cocktails seventeen dollars. I got it all over me. So
that's that's the food set up. And we had a
great time. And it was really weird and awkward because
I had people texting me throughout the game that I
did not tell like I told. I told a few
people that I was there, but people I had no

(18:30):
connection with. I had people texting me that I hadn't
talked to in years. All Right, my neighbor that used
to live near me moved to Texas. She's in Texas, okay,
watching the game on TV. I haven't talked to her
in a long time. Hey are you sitting behind don't
plate at the dodging game? I think you're sitting had

(18:52):
some friends in radio that that I hadn't talked to
in again a long time, and they were texting me saying,
is that you can you wave to the camp or
something stupid like that. This is where you could have
been another rolling billboard, just like moving Man, Matt. If
you had a Bed Mallard show shirt, you could have
advertised the show for hours. It's good point. Yeah, what

(19:15):
I should have done is got like a black shirt
with gold neon gold writing like Lenn Mallis, because that
really stands out, that catches the eye, that's the way.
It's the marketing opportunity there. And what I should mention
too as a Dodgers fan, what an amazing game you
got to go to. There was almost four home runs
in a row in the first inning. Yeah, it was

(19:36):
home run Derbis like shooting out in there. You Darvish.
I love when you dar Wish gets beaten up because
he started Game seven of the World Series against the
cheating Stros and the Dodgers had no chance in that game. Now,
the Astros were cheating and all that, but they still
I mean, you, Darvish had been able to figure out
a way to get those guys out, they still would

(19:57):
have been able to win World Series with other team cheating.
But unfortunately, I digress, But it was it was nice
to see and the Dodgers starting to open up a
little space between the Padres and the Giants have fallen
apart there the frauds we thought they would be this
year back to about a five team give or take.

(20:18):
So so that's all all good, And Marlin's Man said,
when he's back in town Hill, he'll invite me. He
knows it's tough for me to go during the week
so on the weekend when he's back in town, hopefully
we'll be able to hang out together again at Dodger Stadium.
And he bought a bunch of ticks that it was
just me, me and my wife Marlin's Man, but they
were like five other people in our party, including a

(20:41):
former Miss California who was part of that. And there
were there were some first round draft picks that were
mixed in there, so first round picks all around. It's
pretty cool. What does Marlin's Man do for a living again?
Is he an attorney? Yes, marlins Man is a very
successful attorney in Miami and he's been doing that a

(21:01):
long time. He is one of the top attorneys I
am told at what his specialty is in the entire country.
That's how he can afford to live the lifestyle where
he's he goes to He told me, I gotta go
to court. I gotta He had to take a red
eye on Sunday back to Miami because he had a
a court case. He had to go and deal with

(21:23):
and uh, I assume he doesn't wear the Marlins man gear.
That's his costume, and you don't wear that when you
go to court. You gotta dress appropriately. With the Sweet
James of Miami, Like, we have a couple of different
attorneys here in l A that even out of towners
no because when they come here they see the billboards
and they hear the jingles all over l A Radio. Yeah,

(21:44):
Sweet James, superwoman, super lawyer. That's another one. My favorite
is the guy who and it's a Mexican attorney. Have
you seen this as like seven seven seven seven seven seven?
That guy? That guy, the same picture of him when
I was a little kid was on billboards. It's it's outstanding.

(22:08):
He has it aged at all. It's the same photo.
And uh yeah. Without attorneys like that, there would be
nobody to buy billboards. Who would buy the billboards? Everywhere
you look. These attorneys every billboard, every other billboard an
attorney for this then the other thing. So that was
my experience at the Dodger game, rubbing shoulders with the

(22:29):
big shots. We also have rammed all day, not just
the Dodges, rammed all day. Danny g Yeah, it's actually
rammed all night. In this story, did I say ram
it all day? Ram it all night? That's by you
were ramming it all while. You were dodging it all
day at that event, and I was ramming it all

(22:50):
night because on Monday, for Fourth of July, the Tenderni
and I went out to a local event to watch
the fireworks. Now, what they do here where I live
is they clear out where people um hit balls. So
the driving range. Yeah, so the driving range graphs this

(23:11):
big event the city puts on, so people get out
there in the afternoon. There's lots of food trucks funding
games for the kids. They had the deep fried oreos
out there. Nice. When you smell the scent of deep
fried oreos, you know life is good. When you walk
into a establishment or a venue and you can smell

(23:33):
the fried foods, it's gonna be one of the better
days in your life. So you know, there were people
that had been on their blankets and their lawn chairs
for hours. There thousands of people from the San Fernando
Valley and that part of Ventura County. We get a
nice spot with our blanket. You know, we're watching the

(23:54):
kids running around with glow sticks, and certain kids are
doing back flips. A kid next who has two kids
next to us were crying because they got lost, and
their mom was like, where have you guys been? And
the kid was crying and he's like, who if the police? Yeah,
I guess the kids got separated from the parents. She yeah,

(24:17):
she had a glass of wine in her hand. Ben
didn't look like she gave two ships. What happened to
the kids? Let the nice officer baby sit you for
a little bit. It was great. Um. So, lots of
families out there. And now, Danny, when you see all
these kids, do you have PTSD from summer school? And
you're like, oh no, it's funny you should ask that

(24:41):
because I actually saw some of my students. Oh no,
but they didn't recognize me. It's almost like, you know,
a police officer out of his uniform, how many times
does he get recognized? Yeah, so I was kind of
incognito walking around looking at the different food trucks. I
didn't partake. We're like, you know what, we had a

(25:04):
big late lunch, so let's wait for after the fireworks show.
We'll go get some frozen yogurt or something like that.
So these huge lines and all these food trucks. We
were just kind of people watching. I saw one of
the greatest L A. RAMS players of all time walking

(25:24):
around the grounds. Who do you think it was? Our
friend Jackie Slater h Eric Dickerson, That right, I get
it right. Oh let me tell you. When I was young,
possibly I might have I might date myself, but oh man,
that guy was. I gotta tell you. There was a
baseball football card shop called Paper Chase, and me and

(25:48):
my older brother would go in there as often as
we could, and they had this big gumball machine where
supposedly if you kept putting your coins in, you could
get a Rookie card from Eric dick person out of
the machine. And we wanted that rookie card so bad,
the one where he's rocking the goggles. Oh yeah, with

(26:08):
the drip. We single handedly made them a fortune just
by how many shiny quarters we put into that. And
we've never got the Eric Dickerson Rookie card. Of course.
It was a few years old at the time, and
my older brother was like, I'm gonna get that Eric
Dickerson Rookie any time I see him on TV, hear
him on the radio, I'm like, fuck you, Paperchase. That

(26:32):
comes to mind. Dickerson though he had the style and
the pizzas man he was back in and he was
so smooth with the Rams gazelle with that style where
he was straight up yeah and he had I mean
he's I think he's been lost in history because people
they talk about greatest running backs of all time, they

(26:53):
don't often. I feel like they don't talk about Dickerson.
Barry Sanders was so electric and all, but for my money,
the Rams had terrible quarterbacks most of his time, and
he was the entire offense and if he if he
was not exceptional running the ball, they it was a
whole different world in the NFL, right Dickerson. I mean

(27:14):
he had to be a virtuoso every game or they
had absolute turds of corporate I was so pissed when
they traded him. It was Halloween. The Rams traded him
one year to the Indianapolis Colts, and I was so bummed. Oh,
I remember that like it was yesterday. And l A
had great running backs at the time because you had

(27:35):
Marcus Allen on the Raiders. See you could see Marcus
Allen and Eric Dickerson both running the ball in southern
California at that time as a little kid. Man, it
was a great memory. You're right, though, I think about
some of those runs that Dickerson would break off. It
was like he wasn't even trying half the time, almost
like he was running at half speed, and he was

(27:57):
still that much faster and more athletic than everybody else
on the field. Yeah, and as great as he was.
And he'd go against like the Chicago Bears, who would
shut him down and he'd be be draggled and the
Rams would lose by like thirty five points. Yeah, because
it couldn't throw the damn ball, right, You're right. He
played with the Raiders also after he lived. He did, man,

(28:19):
and I got to see him live in person at
the stadium when he ended his career with the Raiders.
It was still awesome to watch him run the ball
at that point of his career. So I'm watching him
walk around this event. He got a falafel from one
of the trucks and nobody bothered him, Nobody said a word,

(28:40):
no one stopped him, And I'm like, man, I bet
he likes it here, because you know, I also saw
a couple of aging rock stars walking around. Those are
some of the folks that live out here in this
part of California. And you know, it's just like whatever,
because you know, you see them around town, just like
how you see Reggie Miller walking around town and guys

(29:00):
like that, and they're just not bothered. No one bothers
them for pictures. They are in a way invisible here
in this part of Cali. So I was just kind
of watching them carry the rock in this case of
lawful and he sat back down with his family. They
weren't sitting far from us, so I'm like, oh, that's cool,
and I was watching him interact with his family, which

(29:21):
was nice. It's almost nine PM and that's when the
fireworks are supposedly going to start, right, So there's this
girl singing on this stage that they had put together
and we're like, yeah, yeah, come on, let's get to
the fireworks. And she's like one more song and we're like,
we don't even know who you are. She sings one

(29:41):
last song and then the lights go down, and you know,
when the lights go off, there's a hush and everybody's excited.
You could feel the excitement in the air for the
fireworks show. To begin. The first firework goes off and
everybody is clapping, and then this family of losers walk

(30:03):
right in front of all of us who are sitting
down and have been sitting down for a long time now.
I've heard some people talk about this before. Ben. When
you've got your spot at an event like that for fireworks,
one of the worst things that can happen is when
in a late arrival shows up and just stands there
blocking the view. Yeah, that's rude, beyond. So now you

(30:26):
got these kids in the back saying mommy, I can't
see you. Just hear lots of voices, one of them
being Eric Dickerson's voice. I hear, hey, sit down, sit
down over there, please sit down, And then he used
the word please, and I'm like, guy, he's a nice guy. Okay,

(30:46):
Well they wouldn't cooperate, Ben, They did not sit down,
And now it's starting to piss everybody off. Good because
you can only see the very high fireworks at this point.
So again you hear a voice is in the back
asking them to sit down. It took a very piste
off TENDERRONI Bend to change the future of these people's

(31:08):
firework viewing. Pleasures. Oh you're TENDERRONI stepped up here. She
want pitbullfrf in her very best you little brats, let's
clean the house voice. She shouts, would you please sit down?
You're being rude? And this family that we were standing

(31:30):
there turn around look at her. I'm not sure what
face she was making. She must have been mad dogging too.
She was behind me. But they sit down, Ben and
everybody applaud including one of the greatest running backs of
all time, Eric Dickerson. Look at that. That's outstanding. You're
you're your TENDERRONI Wow, that's great. So she had to

(31:51):
be a little despotic. I guess would be the term abrasive.
When she needs to raise her voice, she can raise
her voice. She did use the word please, but then
she also followed it up by telling them they were
being rude. That's the voice that they needed to hear
in order to sit down. For everybody, I love it.
That's great. Somebody had to step up. But that's see.

(32:13):
That is a little dangerous though at the same time,
because you don't know how the people are gonna react.
Right if you come out there with this uh, relentless
approach and you don't know if they're gonna be like,
wait a minute, who are you and anything? You want
to get the crank things up. So I knew if
there was any trouble, me and Eric Dickerson would just
go over there and throw some elbows. You'd block. You'd
be the lead blocker. Dickerson would come in there, throw

(32:33):
the elbow down. That'd be the playbook. I would be
his fullback. That's cool. It was a good show. So
it was a good show. After that, I like it
all right. So the Daisy Carnival. So my wife's birthday
was last week. I mentioned Marlin's Man. We hung out
on Saturday, and so she normally, my wife normally plans

(32:55):
everything that we do on the weekends and I just
kind of go along with the flow whatever I'm there.
But her request was for me to plan a getaway.
You said you would hold the info until this weekend. Yeah,
oh wait till you hear this. This is another another
wonderful tale. So uh, it's one of the planned a
little getaway, and I did what she wanted. I spent

(33:19):
some time on I thought, why don't we go on
a nice trip up to California because we love going
to Central California. So I had this whole, this whole
stump speech stop thing, whistle stop train thing where we're
gonna go to Santa Barbara Solving, which is about an
hour north of Santa Barbara, and then up to Central California,

(33:40):
San Luis Obispo, which is I like going up that way.
There's not a lot of people, it's it's pretty cool.
So I decided to play the hits and some really
cool places that I knew we had been to she liked.
So I planned all this stuff out. We pack up
the malamobile with all kinds of snacks. I had to
Costco for gas us and it's on like donkey kom.

(34:03):
And the thing that I did not plan for was
the getaway day traffic. Oh no, the Friday before Independence
Day weekend, it was traffic eddon. It was armageddon on
the highways, there was disaster. So I had this whole
itinerary planned out. Everything was roughly planned time wise, and

(34:25):
all this stuff. We would get to this city by
this time, blah blah blah blah blah. So I used
the traffic app and to try to dodge most of
the grid lack. Normally that usually works, but this time
no such luck. So we had been in the malamobile
for two hours. Two hours. Okay, we are only at

(34:49):
the Screwball and the Getty Center on the four oh five,
you know that. But if you're not from l A,
that's you know, it's still l A proper. You're not
even the San Fernando Alley and that's one of the
famous traffic slowdowns. So now I'm coming down the hill

(35:09):
from where the Getty Center is on the four oh
five to get on the one oh one to cruise
up towards Santa Barbara into the San Fernando Valley. And
two hours into this and the next thing I know,
I'm getting a preview of of what's coming up on
the fourth July. A pyrotechnic spectacular. M all right, and

(35:33):
I'm not exaggerating here for the podcast. Every bleeping check
engine light started flashing, every warning starts flashing on the
mallonmobile and boom goes to dynamite. It was like Danny
the Electric Daisy Carnival Show in Vegas on the dashboard

(35:55):
and I get no inem belishment, no exaggeration, literally and figuratively,
every error message that they had put into the car
starts flashing, right, you losing power, losing power, all this stuff. Uh,
And sure enough the car was losing power. Is this
the same catalytic converter car. Yes? Yes, And I was

(36:17):
demanding whether to take it. We decided to take it.
So we get off the three. This is this is
you talking about irony of life. So I'm cruising in
traffic down the hill on the four oh five from
the Getty Center and we end up getting off at
the Pulvita, which happens to be the off ramp for

(36:38):
the Fox Sports radio studios, the Premier Networks. So I
remembered there was a hole obviously, I've been there for
so many years. Theres a Whole Foods market right across
the street from where we were, so it's right off
the off ramp. So I cruise off. I'm worried the
car is gonna die on the off ramp, and fortunately
I made it into the Whole Foods parking lot. I

(36:58):
was able to stop. We get on the phone with
Auto Clone and they're like, oh, I, we'll get a
truck over there. So Sam, the tow truck driver shows up.
We're trying to get a rental, but it's a holiday weekend.
Can't get a rental unless you want to pay a
ridiculous amount of money. So that what are we gonna do.
We're stuck. You know, what are we gonna do? We're

(37:20):
not rental blah blah blah blah blah. So then we're
gonna get an uber or a lift. But there was
searge prices. Oh the traffic, so it would have been
I don't know, two hundred bucks or something like that
to get back home. So fortunately Sam, the tow truck man,
he felt pity on us and let us ride in
the in the front of his toe truck back to

(37:41):
the north Woods. So that took another over two hours
to get back. We had to take it to the
toe shop or the you know, the repair shop. Birthday
was going good. Oh yeah, this is very romantic. So
it's roughly five hours in traffic before we get back home. Yeah,

(38:04):
Rico swab. And because of the holiday weekend, the car
was sitting until Tuesday to get diagnosed. Mm hmm. It
gets even better. So we take it. You know, they say, okay,
we're gonna test drive and figure out what the problem is.
We think we know what the problem is, and then
they they're like, well, we we can't get the car

(38:24):
error to repeat. We we set the all the error
messages and now the car is driving fine. But we're
gonna keep it. We'll drive it for a few more days.
On Thursday, they say, we can't fit, we can't find
a problem. You can pick the car up. So we
have the car now. But they didn't fix anything, and
we don't know, you know, we don't know at any moments,

(38:46):
like a taking time bomb, it's gonna happen again, you know,
it's inevitably gonna happen again. They didn't fix anything. And
but so so the Friday night, since I had planned
all these exotic locations, we just ended up going to
a very very expensive Mexican restaurant, Danny, that I would
not would not have ever gone to, have adopted my
wife's but then she she wanted to go there, so

(39:08):
over priced Mexican food. My idea of good Mexican food
is cheap and big portions. That's that's my thing. This
was small portions, expensive good. But now what happened with
the hotel? Did you already have something booked up north? Well, no,
that's the other problem. So the place I wanted to stay.
They did not have any vacancies, but it was one

(39:30):
of those things. The plan was there might be a cancelation,
so we'll be fine on That saved you because imagine
if you had a nonrefundable hotel waiting for you up there.
Oh yeah, that would have been you would have been
extra wanting to drive that car off a cliff. I
would have driven the car even with all the warning labels,
all the way up to wherever. All right, we gotta

(39:52):
get out of here on backscratcher, Danny, So we'd have
a lot of time for this. But if you scratch
our back world, scratch you. These are actual reviews to
the podcast asked and every week we check it out,
we say, does anyone and has anyone else added to
the podcast reviews? And this week pretty good week? Then
pretty good week with three three reviews? Why our standards?

(40:13):
That's pretty good. Let's go all right? Twizzle t road
In says, these guys make a story. He said, Ben's
right about Walmart for people watching, but Danny g is
right the place the shop is Target. I can spend
an afternoon and either Joey Chestnut was good and air

(40:34):
crews sounds ridiculous, but once again, great shows fellas you
two are spectacular what you do? That was some twizzle.
T Justin t Y rode In says, Benny the Baller
plus Danny g equals greatness. That says Algebra. I've been
listening to Benny says for the last year or so,
four hours a day, five days a week, and now

(40:55):
I have the fifth hour to look forward to. Danny
and Benny have great on air chemistry, and I truly
enjoy their musings through pop culture and beyond. I totally
recommend this podcast for those of you looking for some
last and enjoy a fun, casual podcast with some hidden
hot takes. Well, thank you, and that was both five
stars and the last one from No Deals here five

(41:20):
stars says great podcast, five stars great, he said, again,
very entertaining. The Joey Chestnut interview is a top three
interview that we've had on the podcast. No Deal says,
I would crawl across broken glass to listen to this podcast.
It's great. Would you take a needle in the eye
to listen to this podcast? That's the other question. Thank

(41:43):
you for those three reviews. That's nice, because I mean,
we deserve a solid two star, five stars, two stars,
one for each of us. In fact, if you look
up to the heavens and you see all the stars,
if you're not in the city and see all the stars,
one for every one of those stars, one point for everyone.
All Right, we're gonna get out of here. What are
you got going on today, Danny? I'm in the studio.

(42:04):
I'm gonna limp in there. Man with Steve Hartman and
Jeff Schwartz. A bonus though. Schwartz is a big Giants fan,
and a few weekends ago he was just mouthing off
on the air about how amazing his Giants were and
how bad the Dodgers were sucking. And now just a
few weeks later, waw what happened? What happened? Mr Schwartz?

(42:28):
Back to reality for the Giants. They overachieved last year.
These are the real Giants. Yeah, so I hope they
start with Major League Baseball Talk on that show, and
then of course the No weekend show with Efraim salom Alright,
check all of it out. We've got another mail bag
podcast on Sunday, and that's about that. And yeah, that's right,

(42:53):
we'll catch you. Then have a great rest of your day.
Thank you Later. Skater got a murder, Gotta go.
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Ben Maller

Ben Maller

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