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June 22, 2024 27 mins

Ben Maller & Danny G. have a fun Saturday podcast for you! They talk: Onion Rings, Side of the Road, Men In Black, The Selfie, Idiom of the Week, & more! 

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Kutbooms.

Speaker 2 (00:02):
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
of the old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He
treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow, it's the clearinghouse
of hot takes. Break free for something special. The Fifth

(00:23):
Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.

Speaker 1 (00:28):
In the air everywhere.

Speaker 3 (00:33):
The Fifth Hour with Me, Big Ben and Danny g Radio.
Happy Saturday, as the fun continues. No days off, no
days off on this the twenty second day of June.
It is National Onion Ring Day today. It's a very

(00:53):
important holiday. Please celebrate appropriately.

Speaker 4 (00:57):
Can you have onion rings without ranch?

Speaker 1 (01:00):
That's wrong, that's the bad answer.

Speaker 4 (01:01):
To hell, do you dip onion rings in because it
is a proven, proven barbecue sauce. No, it's a scientifical
fact that you have to dip onion rings into a
good ranch.

Speaker 3 (01:19):
That's the wrong answer. And when an onion ring is
made properly, you don't need you do not need the ranch.
Justsing now. Unpopular opinion to some, but I will share
my opinion. Anyway on this National Onion Ring Day. To me,
the onion ring should be thin, not thick.

Speaker 4 (01:36):
The I agree, I agree, okay, all right.

Speaker 3 (01:39):
And when they're too thick, it's the crust fells off.

Speaker 1 (01:43):
And it's a big mess.

Speaker 4 (01:44):
Yeah. I don't like the onion thick, and I don't
like the breading thick either.

Speaker 3 (01:48):
So get your onion all the way slash stuff is. Yeah,
there's that fine sweet spot. Now did you know that
the onion ring? I love these facts. I'm addicted to
fun facts. The onion ring goes back. The earliest recorded
recipe for an onion ring goes back to eighteen o two.

(02:11):
Eighteen o two, someone named John Mollard.

Speaker 4 (02:15):
This zy bastard just dipped an onion into.

Speaker 3 (02:20):
The recipe, had fried onions with parmersan cheese in his
cookbook The Art of Cookery Made Easy and Refined not great.
Even in the eighteen hundreds of they're writing books easy
and refined. All those marketing terms, I'll make it easy,
make it Yeah, we're more refined. They still use those
terms all these years later. A restaurant chain in Texas

(02:44):
named Kirby's Pig Stand is believed to be the first
that started selling onion rings at a restaurant, and then
in eight nineteen thirty three they became more mainstream. So
about fifteen years after that original recipe restaurant in Texas
and really took off in the nineteen sixties when A

(03:08):
and W restaurants added onion rings to the menu. And
my favorite onion ring fact that we've learned from doing
this podcast is the story about McDonald's. Remember that story, Danny,
That McDonald's had opportunities to add the onion rings to
the menu. Oh, yes, but they decided not to do
it because they make so much money from their fries.

(03:29):
They were afraid people were just going to buy the
onion rings and they wouldn't have as large a a
profit margin from the onion rings. So McDonald's has passed
on selling onion rings even though they could. But we
have out here Carls Junior or Harty's if you're east
of the Mississippi.

Speaker 4 (03:45):
Yeah, they got good onion rings.

Speaker 3 (03:46):
They've got pretty good onion rings. I'm trying to think
the greatest onion ring you've had.

Speaker 4 (03:52):
Also, if you want to go like an onion ring,
taste but healthier fried zucchini at Carl's Junior slash Hearties.

Speaker 3 (04:01):
Now. The greatest quantity of onion rings you can get,
at least here in southern California is a place called
the Hat. They give you a bag of onion rings.

Speaker 4 (04:11):
The stand is another one.

Speaker 3 (04:13):
The stands, Yeah, stands got big around here, so you've
got that. Is also today's National Chocolate a Claire Day.
If does that move you at all? The Chocolate Claire No, yeah,
I'm not really a Chocolate a Claire guy either. On
this podcast, we've got Side of the Road, the Selfie,

(04:34):
we'll have the idiom of the week, and if we
have time, Pop goes the culture. So we have all
that as we must get to it right now. So
we'll start with this. Is it a bird? Is it
a plane?

Speaker 4 (04:48):
What is it?

Speaker 2 (04:50):
So?

Speaker 3 (04:50):
On my way to work, normal week, nothing special going on.
It was Tuesday, and I have the very long commute,
usually too much traffic, but it's just a lot of miles,
a lot of miles to make the trip from the
north Woods to the beautiful Fox Sports Radio mothership. I'm
again very happy the company's mandated I come in on

(05:11):
a regular basis. I have this whole planned out, my
whole day is completely dedicated to the commute, and because
it takes a long time, I have to leave at
a certain point in that but I have to prepare
for the show. And so you know, these are first
world problems. I'm not playing the victim. I'm just saying
that's what I have to do. And so on my
way to work this past Tuesday, I'm making the long

(05:31):
drive to the mean streets of Los Angeles and then
into the San Fernando Valley, trying to avoid the crime,
homelessness that's all around.

Speaker 1 (05:40):
Now.

Speaker 3 (05:40):
I had just left the Malor Mansion and then out
of the corner of my eye was turning left, and
out of the corner of my eye, I saw the light.

Speaker 1 (05:54):
And then I did a double.

Speaker 3 (05:55):
Take, and I said, well, maybe I'm getting like secondhand
weed or something like that. Or I've been hanging out
with jet who fled? Are we being either invaded by aliens?
Or has someone from North Korea or Russia Senna nuk
our way? Is this what the end of the world
looks like? So I don't want to go all coast

(06:17):
to coast and George Nori on yall or all that,
But let me just tell you what I saw was
awesome because I didn't know it was coming. I didn't
expect it so much, so I never do this. I
never do I was rubbernecking. I pulled off to the
side of the road.

Speaker 4 (06:35):
I thought you were going to say you called nine
one one.

Speaker 1 (06:37):
No, I didn't.

Speaker 4 (06:38):
I didn't do that.

Speaker 3 (06:40):
I have called nine one one a few times when
I've had people driving the wrong way at me. And
I'll tell you what, if you want the police to
show up, tell them somebody's driving the wrong way on
the freeway. They'll show up real quick. But anyway, so
I'm sorry. I pulled up a side of the road
and I get my phone out. I don't usually do that.
I like record this whole thing. I want to soak
it all in. And it did look like a nuclear

(07:03):
missile or a rocket, or it was heading out to
the heavens or was it coming in from the heavens.
I wasn't sure. And uh, it's pretty well. I'm gonna
try to multitask your Danny, and a good, good podcaster
would have sent this to you probably a while ago,
so I'm gonna send it to you right now.

Speaker 4 (07:24):
That's what separates us from the other podcasts.

Speaker 1 (07:26):
We keep it real. That's what we do.

Speaker 3 (07:29):
Of course, now I can't find it. I mean, oh
I find I'll find the video.

Speaker 4 (07:33):
Take my compliment back.

Speaker 3 (07:35):
All right, No, no, I'm gonna send it to you
right now. Just see. Tell me this does not look
like a missile or some kind of religious uh like
sign from the heavens or something like that.

Speaker 4 (07:47):
Just driving along, I have a funny feeling that what
you're sending me is something I saw. Okay other people
post on social media?

Speaker 1 (07:54):
Probably probably so, yes, probably so yes.

Speaker 4 (07:56):
I saw this on social media.

Speaker 3 (07:58):
Well I didn't know about it. That is a a
rocket from elon Musk. I think he might have been
on the rocket from SpaceX that was flying over the
night sky.

Speaker 4 (08:08):
Did this launch from Vandenburg?

Speaker 3 (08:10):
Yes, okay, launched from Vanderburgh. And I will not name
the person here because I did not want to incriminate
the guilty. But the naked streets a friend of mine
who I've known for many, many years, sent me a
message because he loves photography of just different random things

(08:33):
and stuff, and he was at Vandenberg to he was
waiting for this launch. He was there all day and
a rumor has it that he got completely hammered but
drove home because he has a self driving Tesla.

Speaker 1 (08:51):
So here's the question.

Speaker 3 (08:53):
I didn't bring this up to him and I will
not name him, but can one get a dui? If
you're in the car drunk but not driving the car?

Speaker 4 (09:03):
Once the car is on, they can give you a
ticket for being drunk?

Speaker 3 (09:08):
Okay, Well, and they're toning the ruse while Luisa was
driving to be passed out in an intersect.

Speaker 4 (09:13):
Yeah, taking a nap, you know you're you're trying to sleep.

Speaker 3 (09:16):
Let us maybe we have a lot of police that
like these shows. Somebody law enforcement. Let us let us know.
If you're in the back seat sleeping and the car
is off, can you get a dui? See, I don't
think they can give you. Yeah, it's a great cake.
If you pull over to the side of the road
and you're sleeping but you're in the back seat, you're

(09:37):
technically in the car, you have the keys to the car,
but the car's not on, you're not moving, and you're
taking a nap, trying to get rid of the buzz
that you have.

Speaker 4 (09:46):
It says based on the ruling and Mercer Versus Department
of Motor Vehicles nineteen ninety one, while you can still
get a DUI if the vehicle isn't in motion, proof
of volitional movement is required for a conviction.

Speaker 3 (10:01):
Okay, gotcha. And if you're sleeping in the back, that's
where you have to hire one of those billboard attorneys
and you'll be in good shape. Hey, speaking of extraterrestrials
and things like that, there was a story that I
was reading about that was pretty cool. I've never been
to Roswell. Have you ever been to Roswell, New Mexico. No, Yeah,
there's a story I read in the Daily Mail, so

(10:23):
it must be true because it was in the Daily Mail,
and the Daily Mail is never wrong. But they say
they found new compelling evidence at that site, the Roswell
UFO site that proved an alien crash happened in nineteen
forty seven according to experts. Now you're probably wondering, how

(10:43):
the hell could they put it's been so long, what's
left there? But the suppose it extraterrestrial craft crashed in
the outskirts of Roswell, And of course the military came
out right away the crash site and somebody who's they've
been using metal detectors since twenty ten and this geologists

(11:09):
claimed that they uncovered about twenty unusual scraps of metal material,
most no bigger than a fingernail, and have now submitted
one odd metal for testing to uh uh, it's to
a TV show Danny on Discovery Channel Alien Encounters Fact
or Fiction. The testing revealed that the metal was one

(11:33):
percent pure aluminum, which experts said was compelling evidence that
proved the crash happened.

Speaker 4 (11:42):
So they claimed, big, guys that're looking at us, there
you go. It's like Man in Black came to life,
because everything they joke about being true has come true.

Speaker 3 (11:56):
Yeah, yeah, in one way or another. It seems that way.
Like the technology stuff that we have and all that.

Speaker 4 (12:04):
There's like an apol person beside it.

Speaker 1 (12:07):
Yeah, it's pretty crazy.

Speaker 3 (12:10):
If you see an alien, take a selfie with with
the alien, right, that's what you should do.

Speaker 4 (12:14):
They usually move so fast though, that the picture is
always just a blur. Yeah. And the ones who don't
believe this, we've argued about it on Covino and Rich
Rich always says, well, why is every picture blurry? I
don't understand, And it's because these spacecrafts and aliens move
so fast.

Speaker 1 (12:33):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (12:33):
How do you explain the fighter pilots in the military,
they're in the Air Force or the Navy, that are
out in the ocean and see, they witness things that
are impossible with human technology on a regular basis, like
things coming out of the ocean. Now, my theory is
that there's a whole underworld under the ocean, and like

(12:57):
there's a whole species of level critters that live under
the ocean, like Land of the Lost, and they have
ports that they exit and they are studying us, and
then they go back into the ocean and they just
hang out wherever they live.

Speaker 4 (13:13):
In the middle of a plane, Georgie and Nori better
watch out. I think we're listening to his replacement right now.

Speaker 3 (13:18):
Yeah, I'm just saying. I'm just saying, I've already got
the callers. All I just need is the content. That's
all I need is the content. That's it.

Speaker 4 (13:25):
I'm in command. Last Saturday night, we could have really
used one of those space shuttles because we were sitting
in traffic to go to country star Luke Comb's sold
out concert at SOFI.

Speaker 1 (13:40):
Louke Albert Combes.

Speaker 4 (13:43):
Oh, so we kind of knew we were in for
it as far as it being a travel day, because
we went to the ways app and it said two
hours and thirty one minutes to go twenty nine miles.
That's a tough one, yo. The old joke from way
back in the day, it's called the four or five
because it's four or five hours to get to wherever

(14:04):
you're going. Sure enough, that's how long it took us
to get to Inglewood. But it was worth it, man,
because we knew Luke Colmmes was gonna put on a
great concert. My girl, though, for half of that time,
sitting in that traffic, that mess, She's like, I gotta
go to the bathroom. Oh man, I got a pee.

(14:24):
You know, you know when your significant others doing the
pea dance. Yeah, oh yeah. So she's kind of rocking
back and forth a little bit, like, I got a pee.
This traffic's ridiculous. I gotta go. When we got into Inglewood,
we hit city limits and I remember the name of
the street. You would have loved it, Nutwood. And I
saw on my ways app that there was a Target

(14:47):
right when we got into city limits, So I'm thinking, okay,
target parking garage we run in use the bathroom. Usually
when you run into a target. At least here in California,
there's a family bathroom, a men's bathroom, a lady's bath bathroom,
and there's several stalls inside, so you could just walk
right in and use the restroom. It's easy. Not at

(15:07):
this inglewood bathroom. We get inside, the first thing we
notice there are three guards. One of them is armed. God,
this is different from where we live. We find the restroom.
It's got the buttons on it, you know where you
have to put the code in. Yeah, So I'm like, ah, jeszu,
this is a pain in the ass. So I go

(15:29):
find an employee and I said, hey, can I please
have the code for your restroom? And she says, hang on,
I have to send someone over. So they don't even
give you the actual code. They make an employee punch
the code in. Man, this is like the verification it
takes to get into our work email. This is nuts.

(15:50):
So yeah, we're standing over there in front of these
restrooms inside the single would target, and finally an employee
makes his way over and he says, oh, you know what,
there's only one restroom and someone's been in there for
a long time. There was one other restroom down the
hall had a big sign on it that said employees only.
So we're standing, We're waiting, we're waiting, we're waiting. He

(16:12):
comes back around. He's like, the person's still in there.
We're like, yeah, you see us, still standing here. So
finally he feels bad and he's like, come over here.
He walks us down the hall. He punches in the
employee code and lets us into that bathroom. Thank god.
So we use that bathroom get out of there. By
the way, there were homeless people camped out inside the

(16:33):
Target in the Aisles, California.

Speaker 1 (16:36):
Man, California where we live.

Speaker 4 (16:39):
It's on the outside of the buildings in the city city,
it's inside of the businesses. That's how bad it's gotten.
So we're feeling bad for these employees at the Target, like, man,
what a job. There was one guy his job was
just to babysit the cameras, and another guy he was
just watching the door. So it was like a look

(17:00):
out situation. We we get to the venue finally and
it is a mess with cars and people parking in
the residential on the residential streets. We knew SOFI is
expensive because we've been there for a rams Raiders preseason game.

Speaker 1 (17:17):
A great mass of the rators.

Speaker 4 (17:20):
We get into one of the lots. No signage doesn't
say how much the parking is. We thought the girl
was kidding. She said, that'll be one hundred dollars.

Speaker 1 (17:29):
One hundred dollars.

Speaker 4 (17:32):
This is what one hundred looks like.

Speaker 1 (17:37):
One hundred dollars to see And how long is the concert?
Ninety minutes? So much life that ninety minutes.

Speaker 4 (17:44):
My wife had that same reaction and I said, sorry, babe,
your concert t shirt budget just went out the window.
Get away from me. We walk into Sofar. You've been there, right,
but only in the media portion of the stadium.

Speaker 3 (17:59):
Yeah, walked around a little bit, but I'm not. I
have not walked the entire stadium.

Speaker 4 (18:03):
No, it's a long walk. It's like Jurassic Park inside there.
Beautiful stadium, but a lot of walking. And uh, we're
both wearing cowboy boots because you know we're authentic. When
in Rome, Yeah, when in Inglewood, went in Inglewood in
the hood. Uh, and my wife, Yeah, my wife had

(18:24):
a cowboy hat on. It wasn't from Target unless it was.
We find out.

Speaker 3 (18:29):
Did she just buy it? Did she just buy it
at the Target?

Speaker 4 (18:32):
A week before the concert. She got it because we're
authentic country music fans. We both listening to country music
for a long time. Luke Combs is one of her
favorite artists on the planet. She's hyped by the way.
Her mom was babysitting big baby Koa. This is the
first date night we've had in ten months. She was

(18:52):
a static. She's drinking a cold one. It's our first
Bruski in almost a year. The night's looking good. Sit
down in our seats. There's one opener left before the headliner,
Luke Combs comes on stage. Cool seats, great view of
the stage, the best view. These three girls about two
rows in front of us. Nobody else was in front

(19:14):
of them. They were standing up taking turns, taking greats.
Not only selfies, but they were taking turns, doing modeling
sessions where one of them would take a photo of
the other so you could see like the stage, you know.

Speaker 1 (19:30):
In the background, stuppi break.

Speaker 4 (19:33):
Twenty year olds all doing the same like four or
five poses, butt out, fish lips, chest out. They all
had cutoff jeans, boots, booty, showing bellies, showing flat abs, tans.
They looked like country hussies.

Speaker 3 (19:49):
Maybe you want to hang out with me. Were the
only fans models.

Speaker 4 (19:56):
They looked like my grandmother would have called them hussies.
But my better half, she is a cool mom. She
kept facetiming her oldest who loves Lukecomb's and country music,
and for a lot of the face time, she put
her camera on the three hussies.

Speaker 2 (20:12):
Oh yes, that's when you start to look creepy and shit.

Speaker 4 (20:17):
We had the best laugh about, though, Ben is when
they were looking back at their photos trying to find
a good one. And this was going on for like
a half hour, where they're just sliding to the left,
to the left, to the left, looking for the best
slutty photo of each pose. And then we could see
them going to their contacts, Send Send, Send, Send everybody

(20:40):
on their friends lists.

Speaker 1 (20:41):
Men and women take selfies differently.

Speaker 3 (20:45):
When Lebron set the scoring record for the NBA scoring record,
and you looked at the photo and everyone in the
photo except for like two people had their hand extended
like the Statue of Liberty, and they were taking photos
and video of the moment rather than just soaking it
all in and enjoying what was going on.

Speaker 1 (21:07):
Rather than that.

Speaker 3 (21:08):
They're like, no, no, no, we want we want to have
our camera up in the air. Ever, in fact, if
I remember the guy Phil Knight from Nike and the
lady he was with were like the only people in
that one iconic photo. We're not taking taking the picture, Lebron.
Was JJ Reddick at that game? Was he broadcasting that game?

(21:29):
Probably not. Congratulations on your new coach, big news in Lakerland.

Speaker 1 (21:34):
You hired a podcast as your coach.

Speaker 4 (21:36):
Congratulations, and I'd like to congratulate you on that ty
Leu extension.

Speaker 1 (21:42):
Hey, that's fine. We got Jeff van Gundy, so that's
a win.

Speaker 3 (21:45):
Van Gunday in the house and Gunday like like that move.

Speaker 4 (21:52):
Why not?

Speaker 3 (21:53):
Hey, it's funny you mentioned the target in Englewood. Ever
since they built Sofi Stadium and now they have the
into it, don't home the City of Champions, which is
the nickname of Inglewood. You could have gotten a house
in Inglewood about ten or fifteen years I think maybe
fifteen years ago for around four hundred thousand dollars right Inglewood.

(22:14):
The median house price in the hood in Inglewood, one
of the rougher neighborhoods in la is seven hundred and
twenty thousand dollars to live in a place as you described, Danny,
that has a target that has security guards outside the
bathrooms as homeless people sleeping in the target, and that'll

(22:36):
cost you over seven hundred thousand dollars.

Speaker 4 (22:39):
Yeah, And my girl's theory was they can get away
with charging one hundred for parking because you don't want
to park on any of those residential streets.

Speaker 3 (22:48):
That is generally true. But I do remember when I
used to go to the coliseum. They've cleaned up that
area a lot where USC played. The Rams played there,
and there would be people, remember, on the lawns around
the coliseum where people would park, and they'd trust, they'd
trust random people with the keys to their car.

Speaker 1 (23:05):
Pretty pretty crazy.

Speaker 4 (23:06):
A lot of families they would have signs out on
their front yard that said thirty dollars for parking, and
then they would fit as many cars and fans on
their front lawn and in front of their house as
they could fit. If you look closely, I got some
yellowing spots in the nutsedge area.

Speaker 3 (23:23):
Yeah, And they'd sit there in lawn chairs or beach
chairs and just hang out while the game was going
on and get their money and.

Speaker 1 (23:30):
Not a little hustle.

Speaker 4 (23:31):
Why not.

Speaker 1 (23:32):
I'm sure they do it in Inglewood too.

Speaker 3 (23:34):
The problem with Ingwood is you you're fine going to
the event because the sun's probably up when you're walking
into the stadium. It's after the game when you have
to get an uber and then you don't know whether
or not your car is going to be there when
you get there. That's the problem. All right, I think
we'll do the idiom of the week. Then we'll get out.
We have pop goes the culture. We'll do that tomorrow.

(23:54):
But the idiom of.

Speaker 1 (23:56):
The week idiom.

Speaker 3 (23:59):
Of all right, So the idiom of the week here
cry uncle, as requested by Pierre from Springfield. The term
which is generally like a wrestling term, whether your thumb
wrestling or having a real wrestling match, cry uncle. So
there's a couple of different theories in play here on

(24:21):
the origin of this particular idiom, this phrase, a lot
of speculation about it. The term which is universally recognized
as you're conceding. It's a concession speech, I give up
that kind of thing. It goes back to the late
nineteenth century and was used as a focal point in

(24:42):
a joke originally and as the story goes Once upon
a time, a long long time ago, in a land
far far away, a gentleman was boasting that his parrot
would repeat anything he told the bird. For example, he
told the parrots several times before some friends to say uncle,

(25:07):
but the parrot would not repeat it. In anger, he
seized the bird, and, half twisting the bird's neck, said
say uncle, you beggar, and threw him into the bird
pen there and in which he had ten prize birds.

(25:28):
Shortly afterwards, thinking he had killed the bird, he came
over to the bird cage, and much to his surprise,
he found nine of the birds dead on the floor
with their necks rung, and the parrot standing on the tenth,
twisting his neck and screaming.

Speaker 1 (25:46):
Say uncle, you beggar, Say uncle, Yeah, that sounds like
bull crap.

Speaker 3 (25:53):
Now. Other versions of the stories is a man whose
niece had convinced him in to coerced him. I guess
this is a better word, coerced them into buying a parrot.
Succeeded in getting a bird that was warranteed as a
good talker, guaranteed it was a good talker, and all
this stuff. And so there was that, and then there's

(26:17):
also a theory that goes back to the Roman Empire
in which children confronted by bullies would be forced to say.

Speaker 1 (26:26):
Patrue or uncle or my best.

Speaker 3 (26:30):
Uncle in order to be freed. So there's a couple
of different versions on that. But I don't believe the
parrot one. I think that's bull crap. Makes a lot
of sense to me. I think that's ridiculous.

Speaker 1 (26:43):
But cry uncle the idiom of the week.

Speaker 3 (26:49):
Okay, we'll get out having wonderful rest of your Saturday.
We'll be back on Sunday tomorrow with another brand spank
anew podcast.

Speaker 4 (27:00):
You're gonna have shorts on today. It's in the low
nineties in most of southern California.

Speaker 1 (27:05):
I'm living the life. What are you talking about?

Speaker 3 (27:07):
At the ac going you get the shorts on, enjoying
the beautiful weather. You gotta do it right. We pay
a lot in taxes and all that. Although the way,
it's pretty nice everywhere. Right, it's not really bad anywhere
at this point. Maybe a little too hot, but you'd
rather have that than the opposite. Anyway, have a great
arrest of your day. We'll talk to you tomorrow later.

Speaker 4 (27:26):
Skater population
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