January 7, 2019 • 15 mins
As we start the first podcast for 2019, Skeery and Jake are trying to lose weight in different ways.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
Elvis Present Minute Morning showing exciting. Wait, are we allowed
to say Happy New Year? Because I got yelled at first?
(00:25):
Happy New Year ends on January second, But for me personally,
it ends on the day that you first see the
person for the first time. So I don't see you
until February five. Happy New Year on February five. I'm
with you, Yeah, but there's a time limit on that.
I feel like this is the last week you can
do that. But this is the lett know, when people
listen to this podcast, we really shouldn't say anything. And
I'm sorry, scary. Your birthday's February third. If you see
(00:47):
someone on February five, your attitude is gonna be like,
why aren't you wishing me happy birthday? You're not gonna
be thinking about New Year's. Do we have any January birthday? Second? Yeah? Yes,
the same guy every year, the same one you forget
every year day every year me. She at least remembered yours.
She didn't remember. Oh please, I always here, like ten years.
(01:10):
She forgot, I got a bookmark, a car. We're here, Nate.
I forgot because you were brand new and I just forgot.
But last year, what did you ask me for? Okay
you did remember that I asked chocolate cookie cakes, So
there you go. I would like m the chicken parmcake.
(01:32):
I don't like birthdays though, it's just another day, especially
if you get older. I mean, there's a kid, you're excited.
You get presents and cake and a party and balloons
and ship. Now I don't care I'm old, but you
should get the same ship from your Like you know
your girlfriend. She doesn't treat I don't know. She treats
me nice, but I don't need it. It's like great tea.
Do you need to be special on your birthday? You
don't need to, like I do you know I like it?
(01:56):
I mean I don't like my birthday but from some people,
but I would like to be surprised and like a
nice gift come my way or whatever. But like from
you guys, I really wouldn't care. Now that I don't
like you guys, it's just that here at work, I'm
not really a big deal about it. But like at home,
I would home you, like I want Church to really
take care of me. I want her to, you know,
get me a gift that I really want but I
want to be surprised. Uh, it's the same thing you
(02:19):
want every year. Well, I do want that a lot more.
You know, we did. We should we give Greg Tea
the same thing for his birthday every year. In difference,
I got I got. I got Great Tea a gift
over the holidays, and he yelled at me for it
because he was unprepared. That's why I wanted to give
you something as well. But but that's not a gift
give me But I agree, But some people feel that way, right,
(02:42):
So that put in me with Sam. Sam gave me
a huge gift before the holidays. She brought me a
freaking like like the double recliner from my balcony, and
I'm like, um, I didn't get you anything. I feel
like an idiot, And I think the person giving the
gift isn't expecting anything back. You guys are expecting something back.
So if you give me a gift, you're you're gonna
(03:03):
want something back in return, right, Well, I mean yes, no,
I gave everyone Christmas gifts and I didn't expect anything exactly.
I just did it because I wanted to do It
was very nice, but like a double recliner is it
two chairs that recline or one chair that reclines twice.
It's one chair that that's really made built for two.
So it's a fat guy chance. It's like it's a double.
It's a double. It's not a single. It's a double.
(03:25):
It's like a love seat. It's a reclining love seat.
It's a glider. You made it like it was side
by side chairs like Joey and Chandler. It's a glider.
I told you what a glider is. It rocks. It's
it's like you have kids, you have a glider. It's
what it does is it's a non jarring rocking experience.
Are we getting something for me first? Weren't they know?
(03:47):
But I will say, I'm almost forty, and anytime I
open up a card, even if it's Christmas, I still know,
shut up, I still expect check or a check or
money to come out because it's and shook it money
fell out. So I canna tell you a story. I
(04:08):
had to call my mom and thank her over the weekend.
So I I collect papers and I save every birthday
card and holiday card. And sometimes when I'm a hoarder,
when my office gets too uh full of paper, I
get those big rubber made buckets you see it like
at home, deeper like they like they you know, forty
gallon things, and I just throw everything in there. And
in my garage I had like a bunch of them
(04:29):
stacked up in the corner like I'll eventually go through them.
Well they've been there forever, some of them. So this
vacation break, I decided I'm gonna go through the bins
and just clear it out, get through it the stuff
that I've held onto. So I opened this bin. It's
got like old jokes I wrote for the show, and
parody lyrics and newspaper clipping, all kinds of ship and
I find birthday cards my mom gave me. What do
(04:50):
you do with them? Well, I don't want to throw
them out because I feel like, oh my mom gave
to me, right, So I hope I see this card
and my mom always writes the date on the top,
so I know what ear it was. So I see
the card and in the envelope and look at it
and it was really nice and it's really nice saying
on the front. And I opened it and there was
a hundred all a bill in it from two thousand
three sons like mom, thanks for what for that hundred
(05:14):
all the bill I never spent in two thousand three,
and I started going through every envelope because I had
hundreds of cards in there, and I went through only
that one. How did you miss money? Because you know,
here's what I do. I open the envelope, I see money.
I go, you know, I'll leave it in the cards.
I don't lose it, and then I'll celebrate my birthday,
open all the cards whatever. And then I go, oh,
I don't throw cards out, so I'll put them in
a little thing and then I just put it. It's
(05:35):
got a hundred bucks out of nowhere. But if you
had invested that, I would be out of money right now.
The stock market took a dump. That's not the same
thing on my birthday every year and I never get it.
I just want people, yes, height shut up. No, I
just want people to make me something. And no one
will ever make me anything. Make you unhappy never you've
(05:55):
already done that, thank you. Speaking of your net places,
no no what no. So when I gave everybody a
tour while we were on break, let me tell you,
everybody was amazed by your necklaces and they did not
believe that that you had made them all. Um, So
at Gandhi's desk, she's got all of these necklaces that
(06:16):
she made beads. Yeah, and they're gorgeous and they're all
hanging up. So we were marveling at them, and they
all think you should like sell them. Okay, I'll do it. Yeah.
I think you could do whatever you want with the money.
But whether it's you keep it or don't eat or whatever,
but you have such beautiful stuff over there. And they
were like they were, and they like the stuff in
(06:37):
her drawers. When I walked back there and I saw
those rats, I'm like, who started like I was looking
for the beat outside. By the way, if you want
to correctly identify that desk, it's Jake's desk. Before we
hired Gandhi, Jake used that desk as a secondary video
(06:59):
and desk, And so every time kind of gets up
and goes to the bathroom, Jake sits down starts editing
video there. And the day before Gandhi was there, all
his crap was still there, and I go, hey, Jake,
she's coming tomorrow. You think maybe it's time now to
clean it up. I gave him six months notice and
then three months notice noxious like megadesk yeahet out of
(07:20):
the man. I said he made the beads by the
ways of protein powder on that desk. I don't know
what he means. I paid Jake for one of those
necklaces money. So now that Jake is doing this New
Year's Eve whatever New Year, is he going to have
(07:41):
the worst protein farts ever? Oh? You know it's worse
than protein. Did you ever take creatine? This is the Yeah.
This creatine helps your body retain water and uh and
at the same time you help cut you But oh
my god, your farts smell awful. Can have the debt?
(08:01):
I see what was that stuff you will buying out
of that guy's trunk at his calls pro stops, Jake,
don't hit me out yet, that's just his head. It's
bunking season. We wanted to grill you about your swollen
(08:24):
thirty mostly are you going to be stinking up my desk? Protein?
Far worrying? Well? Do you know what I realized is
that I don't have any workout closed like you know,
I used to work out, you know, one week or something.
I have like two pairs of short no no, you
worked out. Remember that day? He actually identified the day. Yeah,
(08:47):
He's like, well there's this day back in two thousand two.
Oh my gosh, Wait, Jake, I have no work close.
I bought some actually over the holidays when you get
unwrapping pajamas. I'm doing a whole video series about this.
You should come to one of my trans sects. Please do. Okay,
(09:07):
you should, But then I have double problem. You might die.
But because I have to participate, watch that's not allowed
to work out days on the way. That is the
only reason story does this diet. He's gonna say he's
not allowed to work out. He's gonna be on day
(09:27):
forty four for the entire diet. Four months go by. Hey, Jake,
you're ready to work out plan. You get dehydrated very easily.
So I have to just stay stay the course. I
have to just stay even keel. But on day forty five,
I'm with you, it's only doing thirty days. What's gonna
happen on day thirty one. I haven't figured that out yet.
(09:53):
You quit and you go back to your normal self. First,
I have to get through the thirty days. Look, that's
a lot of days. Do you see a big difference
and you start feeling amazing, then you're gonna probably want
to stick with it. I think. Okay, around the room,
Scary is on a forty thing thanks on a thirty
day thing, which one lass longer past those dates. Oh, Jake, Yes,
(10:18):
Scary's done. He sticks a cheeseburger down his throat. Scary
has his cut off date. Here, here's the thing. Will
Scary lose more weight? Or will Jake put on more muscle?
Hopefully will put on mules? Gonna lose more weights? I've
seen him do it. No, yeah, it is incredible. You
lose like what forty pounds is that I'll probably lose
this time around? Thirty to forty pounds. Yeah. The first
(10:39):
time out, I lost forty pounds because I was like,
way over this weight that you see me at today.
But I have because I had less to lose now.
But yeah, thirty, I'll at least thirty probably thirty three.
If I if I gained forty pounds muscle, I'm gonna
look like a different person. I'm not. Well. Will you
be once you lose it this time around? Will you
(11:02):
be different than last year? Will you have an exercise? Well?
You know the last sixteen weeks of the year, I
worked out with Sam's boyfriend William Yes, and he worked
me out private, private trainer and he worked out private.
I gained three pounds of muscles over that time, so
I will be in a better place and I this
(11:23):
time plan to go right back into the workout regiment
as soon as the programs are good for you. Plan
where I left off. Yeah, you understand, like you know,
your your body is slowing down as you're getting older.
It's a lot. It doesn't have to slow down, but
he does, and you can do about it. It's got
one more slows down, It's over. Like that's not how
(11:46):
you see it is the Magic Pill, Gas Station and
buy any Net. It's a two hour documentary about people
that they followed the lives of people who completely changed
their lives similar to the way Jake is doing it,
similarly the way that I try and do it every year.
(12:07):
And they throughout all the crap food replaced it with
healthy stuff. But it means they a lifestyle change. They
found that over the course of the three or four months,
the body reversed itself and they were off their medications
for diabetes, for hypertension, for blood, blood, sugar, everything was
gone because they started eating right. So what you're saying,
(12:29):
Gridty is wrong because everything you can do is reversible.
You just have to give your body the chance to
do it, but partially right. As you get older, it's
harder to reverse. You cannot. Seven year old guys don't
lose forty it's not unless they're they're ill. How much
weight did you lose watching this? Did you eat? The
(12:52):
body is made up the same way we're all made up.
It's a fact. Google it. See things work the opposite
on me, supersize me, made me crazy. McDonald's right, but
I'm not even kidding. In the bed with my husband,
I go, oh, cheeseburger looks so just to be like, no,
it wasn't supposed to. But for me to just eat,
(13:18):
write and work out daily and you'll stay status quo.
Just don't you say that like it's so easy, but
it means you have yeah's work out for six hours
a day and you'll be he's talking about he's a professional.
Remove myself a visceral fat in here. I have a
(13:39):
lot of visceral fat around your muscles. Roll the other role.
He's got all the roles listen. I'm just saying the
normal facts of life is that your body fats of
life no matter what you do. It doesn't not understand that,
but you make it sound like it's impossible, like you're
throwing the towel after your fifty. No, just start to you.
(14:01):
Just give up now yourself. That's what it is. You'll
find that after you hit certain plateaus in your life,
like forties and fifties, what you used to do doesn't
work anymore. So you have to adjust to a new
routine to find something that will work because your metabolism
totally changes before you know what. You're playing shuffleboard, right,
(14:21):
that's what happens. Are cheesy normal. I want to slow
down the aging process. You could do that kind of
the freezing thing where you go in the tank and
it freezes you. That your life. Disney do that. That's
just the myth I think. No, no, urban like it's
(14:41):
about Disney's love for yourself, just yourself. I'm gonna love
just like you do on Friday Night. Yeah, are we done?
We're in Jake won't have pizza tomorrow. Fifty in minute
Morning Show
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
Elvis Present Minute Morning showing exciting. Wait, are we allowed
to say Happy New Year? Because I got yelled at first?
(00:25):
Happy New Year ends on January second, But for me personally,
it ends on the day that you first see the
person for the first time. So I don't see you
until February five. Happy New Year on February five. I'm
with you, Yeah, but there's a time limit on that.
I feel like this is the last week you can
do that. But this is the lett know, when people
listen to this podcast, we really shouldn't say anything. And
I'm sorry, scary. Your birthday's February third. If you see
(00:47):
someone on February five, your attitude is gonna be like,
why aren't you wishing me happy birthday? You're not gonna
be thinking about New Year's. Do we have any January birthday? Second? Yeah? Yes,
the same guy every year, the same one you forget
every year day every year me. She at least remembered yours.
She didn't remember. Oh please, I always here, like ten years.
(01:10):
She forgot, I got a bookmark, a car. We're here, Nate.
I forgot because you were brand new and I just forgot.
But last year, what did you ask me for? Okay
you did remember that I asked chocolate cookie cakes, So
there you go. I would like m the chicken parmcake.
(01:32):
I don't like birthdays though, it's just another day, especially
if you get older. I mean, there's a kid, you're excited.
You get presents and cake and a party and balloons
and ship. Now I don't care I'm old, but you
should get the same ship from your Like you know
your girlfriend. She doesn't treat I don't know. She treats
me nice, but I don't need it. It's like great tea.
Do you need to be special on your birthday? You
don't need to, like I do you know I like it?
(01:56):
I mean I don't like my birthday but from some people,
but I would like to be surprised and like a
nice gift come my way or whatever. But like from
you guys, I really wouldn't care. Now that I don't
like you guys, it's just that here at work, I'm
not really a big deal about it. But like at home,
I would home you, like I want Church to really
take care of me. I want her to, you know,
get me a gift that I really want but I
want to be surprised. Uh, it's the same thing you
(02:19):
want every year. Well, I do want that a lot more.
You know, we did. We should we give Greg Tea
the same thing for his birthday every year. In difference,
I got I got. I got Great Tea a gift
over the holidays, and he yelled at me for it
because he was unprepared. That's why I wanted to give
you something as well. But but that's not a gift
give me But I agree, But some people feel that way, right,
(02:42):
So that put in me with Sam. Sam gave me
a huge gift before the holidays. She brought me a
freaking like like the double recliner from my balcony, and
I'm like, um, I didn't get you anything. I feel
like an idiot, And I think the person giving the
gift isn't expecting anything back. You guys are expecting something back.
So if you give me a gift, you're you're gonna
(03:03):
want something back in return, right, Well, I mean yes, no,
I gave everyone Christmas gifts and I didn't expect anything exactly.
I just did it because I wanted to do It
was very nice, but like a double recliner is it
two chairs that recline or one chair that reclines twice.
It's one chair that that's really made built for two.
So it's a fat guy chance. It's like it's a double.
It's a double. It's not a single. It's a double.
(03:25):
It's like a love seat. It's a reclining love seat.
It's a glider. You made it like it was side
by side chairs like Joey and Chandler. It's a glider.
I told you what a glider is. It rocks. It's
it's like you have kids, you have a glider. It's
what it does is it's a non jarring rocking experience.
Are we getting something for me first? Weren't they know?
(03:47):
But I will say, I'm almost forty, and anytime I
open up a card, even if it's Christmas, I still know,
shut up, I still expect check or a check or
money to come out because it's and shook it money
fell out. So I canna tell you a story. I
(04:08):
had to call my mom and thank her over the weekend.
So I I collect papers and I save every birthday
card and holiday card. And sometimes when I'm a hoarder,
when my office gets too uh full of paper, I
get those big rubber made buckets you see it like
at home, deeper like they like they you know, forty
gallon things, and I just throw everything in there. And
in my garage I had like a bunch of them
(04:29):
stacked up in the corner like I'll eventually go through them.
Well they've been there forever, some of them. So this
vacation break, I decided I'm gonna go through the bins
and just clear it out, get through it the stuff
that I've held onto. So I opened this bin. It's
got like old jokes I wrote for the show, and
parody lyrics and newspaper clipping, all kinds of ship and
I find birthday cards my mom gave me. What do
(04:50):
you do with them? Well, I don't want to throw
them out because I feel like, oh my mom gave
to me, right, So I hope I see this card
and my mom always writes the date on the top,
so I know what ear it was. So I see
the card and in the envelope and look at it
and it was really nice and it's really nice saying
on the front. And I opened it and there was
a hundred all a bill in it from two thousand
three sons like mom, thanks for what for that hundred
(05:14):
all the bill I never spent in two thousand three,
and I started going through every envelope because I had
hundreds of cards in there, and I went through only
that one. How did you miss money? Because you know,
here's what I do. I open the envelope, I see money.
I go, you know, I'll leave it in the cards.
I don't lose it, and then I'll celebrate my birthday,
open all the cards whatever. And then I go, oh,
I don't throw cards out, so I'll put them in
a little thing and then I just put it. It's
(05:35):
got a hundred bucks out of nowhere. But if you
had invested that, I would be out of money right now.
The stock market took a dump. That's not the same
thing on my birthday every year and I never get it.
I just want people, yes, height shut up. No, I
just want people to make me something. And no one
will ever make me anything. Make you unhappy never you've
(05:55):
already done that, thank you. Speaking of your net places,
no no what no. So when I gave everybody a
tour while we were on break, let me tell you,
everybody was amazed by your necklaces and they did not
believe that that you had made them all. Um, So
at Gandhi's desk, she's got all of these necklaces that
(06:16):
she made beads. Yeah, and they're gorgeous and they're all
hanging up. So we were marveling at them, and they
all think you should like sell them. Okay, I'll do it. Yeah.
I think you could do whatever you want with the money.
But whether it's you keep it or don't eat or whatever,
but you have such beautiful stuff over there. And they
were like they were, and they like the stuff in
(06:37):
her drawers. When I walked back there and I saw
those rats, I'm like, who started like I was looking
for the beat outside. By the way, if you want
to correctly identify that desk, it's Jake's desk. Before we
hired Gandhi, Jake used that desk as a secondary video
(06:59):
and desk, And so every time kind of gets up
and goes to the bathroom, Jake sits down starts editing
video there. And the day before Gandhi was there, all
his crap was still there, and I go, hey, Jake,
she's coming tomorrow. You think maybe it's time now to
clean it up. I gave him six months notice and
then three months notice noxious like megadesk yeahet out of
(07:20):
the man. I said he made the beads by the
ways of protein powder on that desk. I don't know
what he means. I paid Jake for one of those
necklaces money. So now that Jake is doing this New
Year's Eve whatever New Year, is he going to have
(07:41):
the worst protein farts ever? Oh? You know it's worse
than protein. Did you ever take creatine? This is the Yeah.
This creatine helps your body retain water and uh and
at the same time you help cut you But oh
my god, your farts smell awful. Can have the debt?
(08:01):
I see what was that stuff you will buying out
of that guy's trunk at his calls pro stops, Jake,
don't hit me out yet, that's just his head. It's
bunking season. We wanted to grill you about your swollen
(08:24):
thirty mostly are you going to be stinking up my desk? Protein?
Far worrying? Well? Do you know what I realized is
that I don't have any workout closed like you know,
I used to work out, you know, one week or something.
I have like two pairs of short no no, you
worked out. Remember that day? He actually identified the day. Yeah,
(08:47):
He's like, well there's this day back in two thousand two.
Oh my gosh, Wait, Jake, I have no work close.
I bought some actually over the holidays when you get
unwrapping pajamas. I'm doing a whole video series about this.
You should come to one of my trans sects. Please do. Okay,
(09:07):
you should, But then I have double problem. You might die.
But because I have to participate, watch that's not allowed
to work out days on the way. That is the
only reason story does this diet. He's gonna say he's
not allowed to work out. He's gonna be on day
(09:27):
forty four for the entire diet. Four months go by. Hey, Jake,
you're ready to work out plan. You get dehydrated very easily.
So I have to just stay stay the course. I
have to just stay even keel. But on day forty five,
I'm with you, it's only doing thirty days. What's gonna
happen on day thirty one. I haven't figured that out yet.
(09:53):
You quit and you go back to your normal self. First,
I have to get through the thirty days. Look, that's
a lot of days. Do you see a big difference
and you start feeling amazing, then you're gonna probably want
to stick with it. I think. Okay, around the room,
Scary is on a forty thing thanks on a thirty
day thing, which one lass longer past those dates. Oh, Jake, Yes,
(10:18):
Scary's done. He sticks a cheeseburger down his throat. Scary
has his cut off date. Here, here's the thing. Will
Scary lose more weight? Or will Jake put on more muscle?
Hopefully will put on mules? Gonna lose more weights? I've
seen him do it. No, yeah, it is incredible. You
lose like what forty pounds is that I'll probably lose
this time around? Thirty to forty pounds. Yeah. The first
(10:39):
time out, I lost forty pounds because I was like,
way over this weight that you see me at today.
But I have because I had less to lose now.
But yeah, thirty, I'll at least thirty probably thirty three.
If I if I gained forty pounds muscle, I'm gonna
look like a different person. I'm not. Well. Will you
be once you lose it this time around? Will you
(11:02):
be different than last year? Will you have an exercise? Well?
You know the last sixteen weeks of the year, I
worked out with Sam's boyfriend William Yes, and he worked
me out private, private trainer and he worked out private.
I gained three pounds of muscles over that time, so
I will be in a better place and I this
(11:23):
time plan to go right back into the workout regiment
as soon as the programs are good for you. Plan
where I left off. Yeah, you understand, like you know,
your your body is slowing down as you're getting older.
It's a lot. It doesn't have to slow down, but
he does, and you can do about it. It's got
one more slows down, It's over. Like that's not how
(11:46):
you see it is the Magic Pill, Gas Station and
buy any Net. It's a two hour documentary about people
that they followed the lives of people who completely changed
their lives similar to the way Jake is doing it,
similarly the way that I try and do it every year.
(12:07):
And they throughout all the crap food replaced it with
healthy stuff. But it means they a lifestyle change. They
found that over the course of the three or four months,
the body reversed itself and they were off their medications
for diabetes, for hypertension, for blood, blood, sugar, everything was
gone because they started eating right. So what you're saying,
(12:29):
Gridty is wrong because everything you can do is reversible.
You just have to give your body the chance to
do it, but partially right. As you get older, it's
harder to reverse. You cannot. Seven year old guys don't
lose forty it's not unless they're they're ill. How much
weight did you lose watching this? Did you eat? The
(12:52):
body is made up the same way we're all made up.
It's a fact. Google it. See things work the opposite
on me, supersize me, made me crazy. McDonald's right, but
I'm not even kidding. In the bed with my husband,
I go, oh, cheeseburger looks so just to be like, no,
it wasn't supposed to. But for me to just eat,
(13:18):
write and work out daily and you'll stay status quo.
Just don't you say that like it's so easy, but
it means you have yeah's work out for six hours
a day and you'll be he's talking about he's a professional.
Remove myself a visceral fat in here. I have a
(13:39):
lot of visceral fat around your muscles. Roll the other role.
He's got all the roles listen. I'm just saying the
normal facts of life is that your body fats of
life no matter what you do. It doesn't not understand that,
but you make it sound like it's impossible, like you're
throwing the towel after your fifty. No, just start to you.
(14:01):
Just give up now yourself. That's what it is. You'll
find that after you hit certain plateaus in your life,
like forties and fifties, what you used to do doesn't
work anymore. So you have to adjust to a new
routine to find something that will work because your metabolism
totally changes before you know what. You're playing shuffleboard, right,
(14:21):
that's what happens. Are cheesy normal. I want to slow
down the aging process. You could do that kind of
the freezing thing where you go in the tank and
it freezes you. That your life. Disney do that. That's
just the myth I think. No, no, urban like it's
(14:41):
about Disney's love for yourself, just yourself. I'm gonna love
just like you do on Friday Night. Yeah, are we done?
We're in Jake won't have pizza tomorrow. Fifty in minute
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