November 12, 2020 • 13 mins
We ALL have announcements to make from run ins at the supermarket, posting pictures and someone is getting media training today!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
Firm Presents Minute Morning Show. Is anyone brain fried other
(00:27):
than me? First store Buck, I'm I'm sorry. Yeah, it's uh,
it's been a week. It's been a week for about
five weeks now. Anyway, Welcome to the fifteen Minute Morning
Show podcast. There's Froggy, there's Scotty b in the serial library.
There's Scary who's shaking his head. Yes, there's Danielle in
(00:50):
her basement. There's Gandhi and her boyfriend's apartment. Hello, house House,
and there's a Straightenate. You know you didn't say wenel
Vief when we started the show this morning. I didn't
have my phones on, Elvis, so you may have called
to me, but never too late. When the and there's Garrett,
and there's Uh in the den, there's the one and
only Dave Brody. Hi, Dave Rody, Hello, Elvis, Duran. Well
(01:13):
here we go. So before we get going, uh, today's
announcement Today, I have an announcement to start the podcast. Ready. Yeah,
So I went to King's to do my grocery shopping yesterday.
I was very nervous because the COVID rates are elevating
and I'm like, oh, get in, get out, don't get
in near anyone, you know whatever. So I'm shopping in
the produce aisle or the produce section, and uh, there's
(01:35):
a woman shopping next to me. She says, you're Elvis
Duran and of course I'm fully masked. I'm like, and
she takes her her ear butt out. She said, this
is really weird. I said why. She says, because I'm
listening to your fifty minute morning show podcast right now.
Who you're listening to that filth while you're in the
produce section? Days, Yes, it was yeah, Yesterda. It would
(02:00):
have been posted by then, and it was yeah anyway,
So and so I got really embarrassed. Her name is Mendy,
very very sweet, sweet person, and thank you for your patients. Mindy.
The thing is is we say these things on this show,
and then when you're confronted about any of these things
in public, you're like, oh god, I am dirty bird,
(02:22):
Like I am so sorry, so sorry. The worst for
me is when I'm around my parents friends and they're like,
we heard you the other day saying blah blah blah.
I'm like, shut up, shut up, Sally, don't say that
for my mom. Dad. I love that your friends have
a your parents have a friend named Sally this moment,
Yeah they do. She's great, but she snitches on me.
It's announcement day, Froggy, what's your announcement? Ah? My announcement
(02:43):
is so many people for some reason had been wanting
to see like the gory details of my brain surgery
because we had said that there were pictures from like
an hour after the surgery where I still had like
the ports hanging out of my head from the dreams
and all that stuff, like, Okay, you want to see him, fine,
So I post them today and people are loving it.
They think it's like so cool. I'm like, I don't
(03:05):
know that. I think it was cool. It doesn't bother
me because it's mine. But if you want to see them,
it literally is like drainage ports hanging out of my noggin. Uh,
it's it's cool. It's cool that you shared it with people. Yeah,
I want you to see that if this type of
thing happens, it's rough at first, but you can make
it through. It's also so important, like what a testament
(03:26):
to science. Look what they were able to do to
your head, and that was just an hour after they
went in there, took a piece out and fixed you. Like,
that's crazy. I think it's awesome. Modern medicine is amazing. Scotty,
do you have an announcement from the serial library? I'm
dizzy I could tell you that. My announcement is both
of my children are COVID free sick. They're both sick,
(03:51):
and Nate's like, oh, I need to stay away from
you now, like we do scary, you know, because their
noses are running and they're they're they're not feeling well.
So we had them both tested last night and both
of them are negative. Very nice. I still don't want
to get sick. I don't care if they don't have COVID.
I don't want to get cold out here dragging these
germs in here. You're worse than COVID Jones. Now, hey, Brody,
(04:17):
what's your announcement today? Well, I've got to, but I'll
give you a short one. My Twitter account is not
for you to ask me leading political questions and then
yell at me when you don't like my answer. So
you know what, I can't agree with you more. Don't
ask questions if you don't want to know the answer, right,
don't send me like what do you think of this?
And then when I tell you, yell at me because
you don't agree with me. Don't ask me. My Twitter
(04:39):
is for jokes, Brody. We've been around long enough. We
you know when someone's baiting you for a conversation, don't
even answer because you know what they're trying to do.
They're trying to be a fucking asshole. Just don't let
them bring you down. That's right, you're being a fucking
asshole by doing that. Yeah, on a lighter note, scary
and I always record the Come Boys podcast on Thursdays,
(05:01):
but yesterday he begged me to do it last night
because he had plans today. So I made the mistake
of telling my wife that I didn't have to record today,
and I got a honeydee list. So now I've got
to run errands at four stores, go shopping, pick things up.
So lesson learned. When you get like a break in
your action, don't tell anybody, so you get to keep
that time to yourself. Very good, Right, I want to
(05:24):
get the scariest COVID plans. What's he doing? Let them
assume that your business. What is he doing that he
couldn't do the show today. Uh, podcast, let's go to
your announcement. Scary, come back to me. Why I'm still
I'm still formulating one. What are your plans today where
you couldn't do the podcast today? Oh? I have another podcast,
(05:48):
my other podcast, Speaking Volumes that I do with my
friends Share, which is a now a video podcast. So
it's more important that I also have to do. I
have to do some media training, which is why could
not record the Brooklyn Boys. You do need media training.
We all do, actually, And for those that don't know
what media training is, it's it's something where you get,
(06:09):
you know, you kind of are told. You know, you've
given guardrails and ways to answer questions. So you need
it really really badly trained. Yes, many times of course. Okay,
if that's why I'm as slick as slick and being Danielle,
what's your announcements? Still? Living at home with your children,
you get instant gratification, like if something happens, especially exciting
(06:32):
at school. So every now and then you'll see me
go like this with my headphone because one of them
is run downstairs to tell me something and they go
meaning take your head off, pressed and runs down the stairs.
I got a hundred three out of that test. And
then he turns around and runs back upstairs. So I
love that I'm home and I get this instant gratification.
They get so excited to share things with me, and
(06:53):
it's so cute and I love it and not temperature.
No Heid, Go ahead, Garrett, what I'm sorry? Was it
a ten point extra point like extra credit questions? Three
points was the extra credit question? So we'll go to you, Garrett.
(07:13):
What's your announcement? Well, I have banned a song from
my house and it's only been played two days in
a row. Um My, my children have found out that
Rebecca Black exists, and to hear Friday once is nice,
but they like to hear it about ten times. So
right before I come on every morning, it's can we
(07:35):
hear the Friday song? Because they sing it in school?
So yes, I am. I'm I am banning a song
from my house. It is no longer allowed to be
played under my roof. No more Rebecca Black. So I
mean you've pulled the I'm the Father. It's the first
time I really did it, and I was like, oh
my god, I'm turning it into my parents. It's good
to you banning music. It's Rebecca Black you list. Hey, man,
(08:03):
I'm moving to his house. Hey, I'm saving Gandhi for
last because I know she's a special one. On the way,
So straight, Nate, what's your big announcement today, I'm cutting
my hair. Okay, I get the vaccine. You're gonna look
(08:24):
like Dan from Dan and Shafe. I mean maybe like longer. Listen.
I was having the conversation with haw the last night.
She goes, are you a higher risk because all your
crap I got. I don't think so, And I think
there's people that probably need it more than me. But
when I do get it, I'm just gonna I can't
deal with this. Like every morning I gotta put on
this thing to cover you know. It's just like it's
(08:44):
such a production, and I know this is such a
high class problem for people, you guys that are losing
their hair, and I'm just like, I can't deal with
all this hair. I'm sorry, m keep it, but not
to the vaccine, so it could be a little while.
I got later. What what what don't you like at Scotty?
I don't know, you just look like a weirdo has
(09:07):
such a conservative view on what people should look like.
I think I told you the first time you met
my boyfriend, he was like, too many tattoos. He probably
smells bad by the way. I feel like I get less,
not attention, but I just don't feel like I get
as good a customer service with this thing. Really. Yeah,
(09:29):
you know, you walk around with a man, Butty, your
hair's all messy like this late in the day. People
do take me serious. They perceive you differently than who
you were before the man, But but you're still the
same asshole you were back there. In fact, Heather goes, hey,
you know, when we go out, could you do your hair?
I'm like, and I know, granted I looked like this
that day, but I was like, you look like Uncle Johnny.
(09:50):
You look like Larry from the Three Stooges. Still me,
it's just my hair is different. It's probably less maintenance though.
For you. God, I just I want to get out
of the shower in the morning. Is I love it?
I love your hair, But you do what you want
to do? You do you Nate? Uh? And finally, Gandhi,
what special announcement do you have today? Well, I don't
know how special it is, but for me, it was
(10:11):
special today. For the first time ever, my sister called
me during the show to address the topic that we
were talking about. Oh really, she hotlined you. She hotlined me,
and it gave me a heart attack because she knows
not to call during these four hours. So I saw
her calling, I was like, damn, answered the phone and
walked away. She was appalled at Nate shaving his pubes
in his backyard were She was like, well, she said,
(10:38):
why don't you do it over a toilet? There are
so many solutions in your house to get rid of
your pubists, and you go back into your backyard and
you shave it out there. She was like, you need
to tell him to stop that. It's insane. I was like,
what you called for this? All right? I'm gonna the
toilet thing. I've tried it. I've tried straddling the toilet.
It gets on the rim. There's inevitably that one or
two little pieces that eye off into the corner. I
(11:01):
don't want pubes on my floor. Anyone else. Have the
visual of Nate with junk handing over the bull, shake
it away, now, pege on the ground, pigs on the ground,
but a fool hold it out but the kitty pels good.
(11:25):
Just don't do it with kiddies in the pool. That's that, Garrett.
Where were you saying? Well, just the other day said
he wanted to go in his backyard and jump in leaves.
So hopefully you jumped in the leaves before you shaved.
You know what. This is a year round thing. During
the uh let's say winter, when there are no leaves,
you can just jump into a pile of pubic hair.
(11:45):
I think Nate is onto something here. I kind of
want to come over and borrow your backyard because I
don't have a good place. If you want to do
it outside, the best place to do it is to
find a cornfield. I did that one time when I
lived in Iowa because nobody can see you. Nobody can
see you. I'm not an exhibitionist. When you shuck corn,
(12:07):
it already has hair on it. I don't want service
you can offer to people for your backyard. I did
think about that because there's a vacant lot next door,
and I'm like, I'll just go in the vacant lot
because it's very brushy and very thick in there. And
then I was thinking, like, okay, what if I get
ticks or sense. Yeah, so I just did it in
my backyard. Hey, if you if you open up your
(12:29):
own business, you can call it Pubes be Gone. And
then if somebody wants to pay me five ten dollars
to come in my backyard and shave their pubes, I'll
supply them a razor. The neighborhood's gonna love that. So
how much time do we have frog? One minute? Okay,
So I love the fact that we made our announcements today.
(12:50):
I think that's good. You know, everyone has an announcement
and they sometimes just can't get to it because they're
too busy. No one's paying attention. Sometimes you gotta call
a friend and go, hey, how you doing great? Now
you feel like good? Listen, I need to make an announcement.
Even though it's just a one person. It gets their attention.
It lets them know that you have something that's very
important to you that you want to get across to them.
It's not idle chat, it's a I need your undivided attention,
(13:14):
and that's what the announcements about. Everyone should make announcements
every day. There you go, all right, I feel better
and I would like to come to your house. Elvius
to shave my pukes because there's no neighbors anywhere around.
Don't get near my house, don't get near my Froggy
has the best backyard for that though. By the way,
and this weekend I have a lake and alligators. They
don't want to see your pubs. Go show your pubs
(13:36):
on the alligators. All right, are we done? Alright? Well,
happy days are here again. Have a beautiful day. We'll
see you next week on The fifteen Minute Podcast Morning
Show
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
Firm Presents Minute Morning Show. Is anyone brain fried other
(00:27):
than me? First store Buck, I'm I'm sorry. Yeah, it's uh,
it's been a week. It's been a week for about
five weeks now. Anyway, Welcome to the fifteen Minute Morning
Show podcast. There's Froggy, there's Scotty b in the serial library.
There's Scary who's shaking his head. Yes, there's Danielle in
(00:50):
her basement. There's Gandhi and her boyfriend's apartment. Hello, house House,
and there's a Straightenate. You know you didn't say wenel
Vief when we started the show this morning. I didn't
have my phones on, Elvis, so you may have called
to me, but never too late. When the and there's Garrett,
and there's Uh in the den, there's the one and
only Dave Brody. Hi, Dave Rody, Hello, Elvis, Duran. Well
(01:13):
here we go. So before we get going, uh, today's
announcement Today, I have an announcement to start the podcast. Ready. Yeah,
So I went to King's to do my grocery shopping yesterday.
I was very nervous because the COVID rates are elevating
and I'm like, oh, get in, get out, don't get
in near anyone, you know whatever. So I'm shopping in
the produce aisle or the produce section, and uh, there's
(01:35):
a woman shopping next to me. She says, you're Elvis
Duran and of course I'm fully masked. I'm like, and
she takes her her ear butt out. She said, this
is really weird. I said why. She says, because I'm
listening to your fifty minute morning show podcast right now.
Who you're listening to that filth while you're in the
produce section? Days, Yes, it was yeah, Yesterda. It would
(02:00):
have been posted by then, and it was yeah anyway,
So and so I got really embarrassed. Her name is Mendy,
very very sweet, sweet person, and thank you for your patients. Mindy.
The thing is is we say these things on this show,
and then when you're confronted about any of these things
in public, you're like, oh god, I am dirty bird,
(02:22):
Like I am so sorry, so sorry. The worst for
me is when I'm around my parents friends and they're like,
we heard you the other day saying blah blah blah.
I'm like, shut up, shut up, Sally, don't say that
for my mom. Dad. I love that your friends have
a your parents have a friend named Sally this moment,
Yeah they do. She's great, but she snitches on me.
It's announcement day, Froggy, what's your announcement? Ah? My announcement
(02:43):
is so many people for some reason had been wanting
to see like the gory details of my brain surgery
because we had said that there were pictures from like
an hour after the surgery where I still had like
the ports hanging out of my head from the dreams
and all that stuff, like, Okay, you want to see him, fine,
So I post them today and people are loving it.
They think it's like so cool. I'm like, I don't
(03:05):
know that. I think it was cool. It doesn't bother
me because it's mine. But if you want to see them,
it literally is like drainage ports hanging out of my noggin. Uh,
it's it's cool. It's cool that you shared it with people. Yeah,
I want you to see that if this type of
thing happens, it's rough at first, but you can make
it through. It's also so important, like what a testament
(03:26):
to science. Look what they were able to do to
your head, and that was just an hour after they
went in there, took a piece out and fixed you. Like,
that's crazy. I think it's awesome. Modern medicine is amazing. Scotty,
do you have an announcement from the serial library? I'm
dizzy I could tell you that. My announcement is both
of my children are COVID free sick. They're both sick,
(03:51):
and Nate's like, oh, I need to stay away from
you now, like we do scary, you know, because their
noses are running and they're they're they're not feeling well.
So we had them both tested last night and both
of them are negative. Very nice. I still don't want
to get sick. I don't care if they don't have COVID.
I don't want to get cold out here dragging these
germs in here. You're worse than COVID Jones. Now, hey, Brody,
(04:17):
what's your announcement today? Well, I've got to, but I'll
give you a short one. My Twitter account is not
for you to ask me leading political questions and then
yell at me when you don't like my answer. So
you know what, I can't agree with you more. Don't
ask questions if you don't want to know the answer, right,
don't send me like what do you think of this?
And then when I tell you, yell at me because
you don't agree with me. Don't ask me. My Twitter
(04:39):
is for jokes, Brody. We've been around long enough. We
you know when someone's baiting you for a conversation, don't
even answer because you know what they're trying to do.
They're trying to be a fucking asshole. Just don't let
them bring you down. That's right, you're being a fucking
asshole by doing that. Yeah, on a lighter note, scary
and I always record the Come Boys podcast on Thursdays,
(05:01):
but yesterday he begged me to do it last night
because he had plans today. So I made the mistake
of telling my wife that I didn't have to record today,
and I got a honeydee list. So now I've got
to run errands at four stores, go shopping, pick things up.
So lesson learned. When you get like a break in
your action, don't tell anybody, so you get to keep
that time to yourself. Very good, Right, I want to
(05:24):
get the scariest COVID plans. What's he doing? Let them
assume that your business. What is he doing that he
couldn't do the show today. Uh, podcast, let's go to
your announcement. Scary, come back to me. Why I'm still
I'm still formulating one. What are your plans today where
you couldn't do the podcast today? Oh? I have another podcast,
(05:48):
my other podcast, Speaking Volumes that I do with my
friends Share, which is a now a video podcast. So
it's more important that I also have to do. I
have to do some media training, which is why could
not record the Brooklyn Boys. You do need media training.
We all do, actually, And for those that don't know
what media training is, it's it's something where you get,
(06:09):
you know, you kind of are told. You know, you've
given guardrails and ways to answer questions. So you need
it really really badly trained. Yes, many times of course. Okay,
if that's why I'm as slick as slick and being Danielle,
what's your announcements? Still? Living at home with your children,
you get instant gratification, like if something happens, especially exciting
(06:32):
at school. So every now and then you'll see me
go like this with my headphone because one of them
is run downstairs to tell me something and they go
meaning take your head off, pressed and runs down the stairs.
I got a hundred three out of that test. And
then he turns around and runs back upstairs. So I
love that I'm home and I get this instant gratification.
They get so excited to share things with me, and
(06:53):
it's so cute and I love it and not temperature.
No Heid, Go ahead, Garrett, what I'm sorry? Was it
a ten point extra point like extra credit questions? Three
points was the extra credit question? So we'll go to you, Garrett.
(07:13):
What's your announcement? Well, I have banned a song from
my house and it's only been played two days in
a row. Um My, my children have found out that
Rebecca Black exists, and to hear Friday once is nice,
but they like to hear it about ten times. So
right before I come on every morning, it's can we
(07:35):
hear the Friday song? Because they sing it in school?
So yes, I am. I'm I am banning a song
from my house. It is no longer allowed to be
played under my roof. No more Rebecca Black. So I
mean you've pulled the I'm the Father. It's the first
time I really did it, and I was like, oh
my god, I'm turning it into my parents. It's good
to you banning music. It's Rebecca Black you list. Hey, man,
(08:03):
I'm moving to his house. Hey, I'm saving Gandhi for
last because I know she's a special one. On the way,
So straight, Nate, what's your big announcement today, I'm cutting
my hair. Okay, I get the vaccine. You're gonna look
(08:24):
like Dan from Dan and Shafe. I mean maybe like longer. Listen.
I was having the conversation with haw the last night.
She goes, are you a higher risk because all your
crap I got. I don't think so, And I think
there's people that probably need it more than me. But
when I do get it, I'm just gonna I can't
deal with this. Like every morning I gotta put on
this thing to cover you know. It's just like it's
(08:44):
such a production, and I know this is such a
high class problem for people, you guys that are losing
their hair, and I'm just like, I can't deal with
all this hair. I'm sorry, m keep it, but not
to the vaccine, so it could be a little while.
I got later. What what what don't you like at Scotty?
I don't know, you just look like a weirdo has
(09:07):
such a conservative view on what people should look like.
I think I told you the first time you met
my boyfriend, he was like, too many tattoos. He probably
smells bad by the way. I feel like I get less,
not attention, but I just don't feel like I get
as good a customer service with this thing. Really. Yeah,
(09:29):
you know, you walk around with a man, Butty, your
hair's all messy like this late in the day. People
do take me serious. They perceive you differently than who
you were before the man, But but you're still the
same asshole you were back there. In fact, Heather goes, hey,
you know, when we go out, could you do your hair?
I'm like, and I know, granted I looked like this
that day, but I was like, you look like Uncle Johnny.
(09:50):
You look like Larry from the Three Stooges. Still me,
it's just my hair is different. It's probably less maintenance though.
For you. God, I just I want to get out
of the shower in the morning. Is I love it?
I love your hair, But you do what you want
to do? You do you Nate? Uh? And finally, Gandhi,
what special announcement do you have today? Well, I don't
know how special it is, but for me, it was
(10:11):
special today. For the first time ever, my sister called
me during the show to address the topic that we
were talking about. Oh really, she hotlined you. She hotlined me,
and it gave me a heart attack because she knows
not to call during these four hours. So I saw
her calling, I was like, damn, answered the phone and
walked away. She was appalled at Nate shaving his pubes
in his backyard were She was like, well, she said,
(10:38):
why don't you do it over a toilet? There are
so many solutions in your house to get rid of
your pubists, and you go back into your backyard and
you shave it out there. She was like, you need
to tell him to stop that. It's insane. I was like,
what you called for this? All right? I'm gonna the
toilet thing. I've tried it. I've tried straddling the toilet.
It gets on the rim. There's inevitably that one or
two little pieces that eye off into the corner. I
(11:01):
don't want pubes on my floor. Anyone else. Have the
visual of Nate with junk handing over the bull, shake
it away, now, pege on the ground, pigs on the ground,
but a fool hold it out but the kitty pels good.
(11:25):
Just don't do it with kiddies in the pool. That's that, Garrett.
Where were you saying? Well, just the other day said
he wanted to go in his backyard and jump in leaves.
So hopefully you jumped in the leaves before you shaved.
You know what. This is a year round thing. During
the uh let's say winter, when there are no leaves,
you can just jump into a pile of pubic hair.
(11:45):
I think Nate is onto something here. I kind of
want to come over and borrow your backyard because I
don't have a good place. If you want to do
it outside, the best place to do it is to
find a cornfield. I did that one time when I
lived in Iowa because nobody can see you. Nobody can
see you. I'm not an exhibitionist. When you shuck corn,
(12:07):
it already has hair on it. I don't want service
you can offer to people for your backyard. I did
think about that because there's a vacant lot next door,
and I'm like, I'll just go in the vacant lot
because it's very brushy and very thick in there. And
then I was thinking, like, okay, what if I get
ticks or sense. Yeah, so I just did it in
my backyard. Hey, if you if you open up your
(12:29):
own business, you can call it Pubes be Gone. And
then if somebody wants to pay me five ten dollars
to come in my backyard and shave their pubes, I'll
supply them a razor. The neighborhood's gonna love that. So
how much time do we have frog? One minute? Okay,
So I love the fact that we made our announcements today.
(12:50):
I think that's good. You know, everyone has an announcement
and they sometimes just can't get to it because they're
too busy. No one's paying attention. Sometimes you gotta call
a friend and go, hey, how you doing great? Now
you feel like good? Listen, I need to make an announcement.
Even though it's just a one person. It gets their attention.
It lets them know that you have something that's very
important to you that you want to get across to them.
It's not idle chat, it's a I need your undivided attention,
(13:14):
and that's what the announcements about. Everyone should make announcements
every day. There you go, all right, I feel better
and I would like to come to your house. Elvius
to shave my pukes because there's no neighbors anywhere around.
Don't get near my house, don't get near my Froggy
has the best backyard for that though. By the way,
and this weekend I have a lake and alligators. They
don't want to see your pubs. Go show your pubs
(13:36):
on the alligators. All right, are we done? Alright? Well,
happy days are here again. Have a beautiful day. We'll
see you next week on The fifteen Minute Podcast Morning
Show
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