#368: How Do You Do Your Do-Do?

#368: Skeery is still living out of boxes and a makeshift podcast studio and may soon have his first houseguest- Tall Darren; Brody gives butt wiping stats; Skeery got accused of "walking Italian;" Brody got security called on him at a store after they accused him of stealing; Skeery is so lazy he wants to buy self-watering plants; Facebok marketplace stories; Skeery wants to host Easter for his family and Brody thinks it's a terrible idea; the boys learn about mules

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Start up, dot Up, start Up, Brooklyn Boys, start Up,
Brooklyn Boys, start up Up. They making noise, dot up,
start up, dot Up, Episode.

Speaker 2 (00:17):
Three sixty eight. It's the Brooklyn Boys podcast. Scary and
brody and brody and scary and still trying to sew.
That's us, still trying to settle into my new studios.
And they're not not even mere completion, not even close.
We've we've just begun. Really, thank you, Thank you Carpenters. Yeah, exactly,

(00:39):
I was hoping you'd say that. So, you know, ah,
it's gonna be a while, man, until until this thing
is taken care of, until I'm actually fully settled in
here into my new studio, office bedroom, guest bedroom, I
already have. I already have a person raising their hand though.
Told Darren it was like, yoh man, I'm gonna be

(01:00):
in town next week. Can I crash at your place?
The problem is he didn't even know I moved. I said, oh,
so I let him show up to the old place.
I said, there's no furniture in there, It's just an
empty apartment waiting to be sold. So I said Darren,
I said, I love you, buddy. Under normal circumstances, I'd

(01:23):
be like, sure, you could stay over and sleep on
the couch. But I got good news and bad news.
The good news is I've moved across the street, doubled
my space, setting up against bedroom with a pullout sofa
and your own bathroom. I said. The bad news is
it's not ready yet. It's everything's in boxes and there's nothing.

(01:47):
Do you know what he tells me? He says, coming anyway, Yeah,
he goes, I'll tell you what. I'm gonna gift you
an air mattress. I'm gonna send it to you a house,
and I'll sleep on an air mattress on a floor
in your office, I said, Darren, I said, come on, man,
we're grown ass men here. He wants to do it.
He wants to buy me an air mattress. Well, that's

(02:11):
awfully nice, awfully nice. It's awful just the first part.
I don't know what I said. This is gonna be
so uncomfortable for you. You really want to sleep on a floor. No,
an air mattress is fine, you get a good one.
I have one, but it's got a very tiny leak
in it and I never fixed it. I don't even
need an air mattress. When this bed is up and running.

(02:34):
Fuck it, man, I'm gonna have my own guest bed.
I don't need it. I don't need an air mattress
at this point. I need an air mattress for my
old place. Yeah, the boy's coming over though, it's gotta
have someplace to sleep. You can sleep in your bed now,
that's not happening. And normally he'd sleep on a sofa.
But I don't have my sofa yet. It hasn't been delivered.

(02:54):
I'll tell you. There's so much that hasn't been done.
And dude, why did you do all this half backwards?
You didn't have your cable, you didn't have your if
would have set up, you didn't do anything. It all happened.
It all happened so fast, it really did. We had
two months, you had two months. What I don't understand.
You know that would have required me trying to shop for,
you know, a dining room table sixteen weeks in advance.

(03:16):
I mean, I can't be dining room table. When was
the last time you had people over for dinner? Well,
that's the man going forward, you know. Yeah, we used
to eat on your round kitchen table. Move the stack
of papers and we would eat dinner, eat at your table. Well,
my hope is that you know, you know, since my
mom passed, we don't really do anything at my dad's house.
So so my sister takes Christmas Eve, my my brother

(03:41):
takes Christmas Day. My brother will take Thanksgiving, my sister
will take another holiday. But that really leaves Easter open.
So I kind of want to be the Easter guy
every I mean, especially since you know Easter in this area,
you know it'll be nice out all right, are you
going to cook?

Speaker 1 (03:58):
Now?

Speaker 2 (03:58):
Fuck that, I'll get that shit catered. But my point
is I want to be able to have a dining
room table that can accommodate the entire Yeah, okay, except
you have a couch. You order the couch, right, how
many people can sit on this couch that you bought,
like three or four? Three or four? Thanks Pete Puma exactly.
So but then I have how many chairs do you have?

(04:20):
So maybe six? Two extra chairs? And then I have
four chairs four bar bart type chairs. Yeah, no, we
don't count bar chairs. How many regular chairs you have?
Three on the couch comfortably and a couple other chairs. Yeah,
you can't entertain for Easter. You don't have enough chance
for the adults. You have no place for the kids
to be. They're gonna wreck your studio. You're gonna yellt them,

(04:42):
don't touch my five thousand dollars couch. No, but you can't.
We have other floors they can go to. There's a
lot of amenities in this building. There's okay, kids under
twelve go wander the building. Yeah, that's what the other
families do. They did that in my old building too.
They just let the kids. Yeah you know, you think
your siblings are gonna let their kids roam around a

(05:02):
new building? Yeah? Why no? I mean I listen. I
was the day I got on the elevator the other
day and these two fucking kids were pressing all the
buttons and going up and down, up and down. I'm like,
where are your parents? I mean, I guess this is
what they do for recreation. They let the kids roam
the building and just play with the elevator all day.
And I was trying to get to a floor and

(05:23):
they were like, they weren't really getting out at the
floor anyway. There's also can we get one of your
siblings on the podcast to ask them if you should
have Easter your place, Yes, And if the kids can
roam the building unwatched, yes we can. We'll do that later. Also,
there's a game room for the kids. They got pinned.
They got air hockey, and and I thought, you know, foosball.

(05:44):
I have a golf simulator. I don't know. You gotta
bring your own clubs. But you literally there's a room
and you just start whacking the clubs at the fucking screen.
You know what I'm saying. In your apartment doing that,
whack my own club that's right, you know, but don't
you don't you have don't you have a putter? We
all got putters that year. Remember from that that uh

(06:06):
remember the guy that was gonna get us all NFL
jerseys and all we got was putters. Yeah, I don't
get you guys NFL jackets and jerseys. There's also a
putting green, an outdoor putting green on one of the floors,
but the golf simulator, and you got an indoor indoor pool,
indoor pool, and there's two floors to entertain, and we
could go. We have a chef's kitchen, which we could

(06:28):
have the whole family there, or there's a there's a
wine tasting room, which I can have my family for
an intimate gathering on the wine tasting room on the
on the first floor. Yeah, slices. I know in your
mind you're thinking boogie boogie boogie, boogie boogie boo. But
I'm but but but he did say it was just
an elevator. It wasn't a glass elevator with a with

(06:48):
a lobby you could look down on. At least the
elevator sounds normal. I'm saying, you moved into a place
with a wine bar and a gourmet kitchen, and and
and and a golf a golf course, and I have it,
which also means I have I have options to entertain
my family. So we don't this my apartment, No, I can.
I can actually rent out one of the other rooms,
like I could rent out the um uh, the movie

(07:10):
there's a movie theater. We have a movie theater with
a projection screen, with all the with all the chairs,
and we could plus the bowling alley on. We don't
have one of those, but I want to dump, you know,
but I could like have them with The wine tasting
room is a really sexy little room and we could
do catering there. I could put catering dishes up there.
And okay, why how is it a wine tasting room?

(07:31):
Did I give you wine? They give you the glasses
and the wine refrigerat. You have to bring your own
wine and taste drink that taste wine you've already had.
B y O, yes, and listen, here's what I think
you should do. Oh, I got barbecue. I got barbecue pits.
Bro I got I can do barbecue. Now, barbecue pits
or barbecue grills, Well, they're grills, but they're in a pit,
so they're pits. You have to climb down into the

(07:53):
get to the Okay, you should have your dad over
dinner and be a big shot and say, Dad, you
know what I'd love you. Don't go home to empty house.
Stay in my guest bedroom. I'll take you home in
the morning. That's what you should do. I would love that.
And that's who's to say that that might not happen.
But my point is, because here's here's what could happen. Yeah,
here's what could happen. Hey, Dad, I was thinking maybe

(08:15):
you could stay, bring me bring you know ho's this? Hey,
it's uh afgang quote Mike heyf gang quote Mike what's up?

Speaker 1 (08:21):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (08:21):
I want to go to a roof top ball tonight.
It's nice weather. Hey Dad, you're out of here. Go home.
Oh come on now, stop that. I wouldn't do that
to my dad. You know, you are such an asshole.
You really are nothing. You you you only get you
like a fine wine, you get, you get more. I
can go to ripe with age, more, ripe with wine.
You could have me in the wine tasting room exactly,

(08:43):
you know. And and and that's why I got a
four leaf dining room table. The thing has four leaves,
so people around that table. It's gonna be great. Except
every everyone's gonna come to your house and they're all
gonna leave. Hey, yeah, hey, when you're hanging out in
the wine tasting room and you're meeting your new neighbors
and they say, hey are you? Who are you? Hey,
I'm scary Jones. I just want to let you know

(09:05):
my BMW Brooklyn Gray. That'll be a good opening, Like
I will say that. You know, sometimes they get a
little scared, you know, because I'm in that I'm in
that new parking lot and I'm like, oh god, my
car is so nice. What's gonna happen? Here in this park,
I gotta be honest, like there's like twelve cars like better, nicer,

(09:26):
more expensive than mine. And that's only on the first row.
So I'm good. I got like there was a there's
a Porsche, a few Mercedes. Maybe, honey, look at that
that that off white BMW. Somebody let their help park
their car here. You know, somebody actually has a Brooklyn

(09:46):
Gray x X five And I'm like, huh cool. It
must have been in the showroom trying to get get
rid of it. Wow, you aren't salty tonight? What's going
on with you? Man?

Speaker 1 (09:58):
Now?

Speaker 2 (09:58):
I'm not salty. I'm gonna mood. Hey. Uh, I want
to talk about toilet Brian, because I know you said
tall Darren wants to come over. And by the way,
if tall Darn comes over, you can eat an extra
large bed for him. Yeah. Well, you know, well his
feet always hangs off the bed. He's six seven, so
it's not did you say his feet always hangs off
the bed? They hang they hang off the bed. Oh yeah,

(10:20):
all right, So well I want to talk about I
want to talk about toilets when we come back from break.
So right after the commercials I got I got something
about uh yeah something yep, toilets and paper and toilet paper.
I cannot I cannot wait my boys podcast. So a
conversation erupted at Pickleball. Oh, and you know, I did

(10:43):
check Scary to see if I sent you the Pickleball song,
and I did send it to you, so October of
twenty twenty five. But that's okay, because I'm gonna play
it myself, okay, please, okay? Is that you're that's my intro.

(11:10):
It's my talk bed, as they say in the industry.
As they say in the industry, I have a pick
a Ball story. You keep it low, but go for it.
It's low. I'm talking over my bed, okay. So, uh,
what conversation came up and somebody said something about, oh,
they came out of the bathroom. They came out of
the bathroom, came out of the bathroom, and they noticed

(11:33):
that there was toilet paper folded like on the sink,
like extra toilet paper. So I said, oh, that's weird.
So then one of the girls said, oh, no, I
I fold my toilet paper when I before I wipe,
I fold it. I'm like, fold it, fold my toilet
I's got time for folding the paper the women. The

(11:55):
woman was like, oh, no, I you know you dab
it litill dab it little dab a little dabble. Do
you go d do you? And so I go dab yeah,
yaba daba yeah, yaba daba pooh. So I'm like, I
don't whould help folds toilet paper. So I looked it up.
I found this on the Cottonell website. There are four

(12:18):
different ways to clean yourself with toilet paper. Scary you
tell me, Yeah, you tell me which one you do.
I'll tell you which one I do, and then we'll
I'll tell you the percentage of Americans that do it
that way. So there's folding generally preferred by men. Bold
I never heard of this. Folders will fold the toilet
paper into neat squares before they wipe. Okay, crumpling. Crumplers

(12:43):
will press the toilet paper into a loosely shaped ball
before they wipe. Okay. Uh, and I'll give you statistics.
Hand wrapping. Okay, they wrapped the toilet paper around their
hand to form a glove that they use to wipe with. Okay.
A combination. Some people might use a combination of techniques,

(13:06):
starting with one then switching to another on subsequent wipes,
like oh, I'll fold off fold I got time for
this is I'm gonna crumple. I'm a folder. You gotta
be honest, and some people hold on. Some people opt
to wet their toilet paper thorough clean. Okay, all right,
so talk to me. You're a folder? A folder? Yeah? America,

(13:27):
fifty fifty four percent of people claim to be a folder,
although the majority is heavily skewed towards the male demographic.
So women are not folders. I would have thought they
were folded. The hand wrappers, so crumpling. Twenty six percent
of the population uses this method. Show most women opt
to use this method. Women are crumplers. Okay, I am

(13:50):
a crumpler, by the way, from way back, okay, hand wrapping.
Nine percent are hand wrappers. So there you go. Now,
big question came up because this was the next conversation.
Front to back or back to front. If you're a
Metallica fan, back to the front. Oh wait, oh no,

(14:13):
I'm a I'm a back to front gake. I think
wait uh good, think about this. Yeah, no, front to back,
front to back, okay, wiping front to back. I am
I am. I'm a back to front lazy person. Okay,
it depends. It depends on what the job is at hand.

(14:34):
If the job is a problem, then then uh, front
to back. But I I back to front if I
can so. Wiping front to back if you don't have
any physical limitations preventing you from reaching around your body,
it's generally considered the safer route to go, moving the
bad stuff away from your more delicate parts, lowering the
risk of infection, especially if you're a woman. Well that's

(14:56):
the thing for a woman, right, wiping back to front.
Men generally have a bit of an easier time wiping
as their parts are further apart, meaning there is less
risk of bacteria transmission. They can employ a back to
front movement or a front to back movement. Once again,
why it's great to be a man pee in the snow.
He's standing up and options to wipe front and back back.
What made you go down this rabbit hole? Uh, excuse me,

(15:20):
it's it's not a rabbit hole. If you have a
rabbit up there, you got a problem. So I don't
have stats on back to front front to back, but
I just wanted to let you know little information that
was spawned by that conversation. Now, now that we're on
that conversation, I have another conversation for you. Want to
ask you, scaring you? You know what a mule is, right,

(15:44):
don't say what a mule is, but you know what
a mule is, right? Yes? Okay? And would you say
how often can a mule have an offspring per year?
I mean this has gotta be a trick question, right,
maybe per year? Yeah, I'm gonna say none. I feel

(16:09):
like a mule's pregnancy is longer than a year. Okay. Uh,
the answer is none. But that's because mules cannot have
off spring. They they can't? Are they they cannot? Are
they male? No? No, mules male or female?

Speaker 1 (16:28):
Right?

Speaker 2 (16:29):
Not have off spring? Why are they asexual? No? I'm
gonna blow your mind, scary. How How are you know
how a mule is made? Where mules come from? Is
it like, uh, the runt of the litter or something
like that. It's probably sounds like a mule is like
a dwarf of in the animal world or something some

(16:50):
kind of a Uh, it's a it's it's an animal
with a birth defect, and that's why they call it
a mule. That's what it sounds like. Okay. So for
those of you who live on farm territory or rural areas, Oh,
they're already yelling at the speaker, they're yelling at the phone.
I know what a damn mule is. God, damn it. Okay,
so I recently learned this. I have to be honest,

(17:13):
all right, No, no, don't, don't be honest whatever you do. Okay.
Mules are produced by crossing a male donkey with a
female horse. Mules didn't exist. They are not God created.
If you believe God created all the animals, they are
not God created. A donkey and a male donkey marse

(17:35):
very important because scary. You know what happens if you
cross a female donkey with a male horse. What happens?
You get a hennie? A hennie? Yeah, and let me
guess hinnies can't reproduce either, right, but they look more
like small horses and they don't have the strength and

(17:57):
power of a mule. So you got to get the
little male donkey to get up on top of that
big female horse and ride it. And then why can't
two mules have have offspring? Because when you when you
mate a male donkey when you made a donkey with
a horse, they have different chromosome amounts, so their offspring

(18:20):
are fed up. So it is I was right. A
mule is like a deformed Well it's not deformed, but
it's it's not a naturally occurring thing. With two horses
had a mule. You have to have a mule and
a donkey. Now, I don't know who thought of this idea.
Maybe they just let a horse out have at it
with a donkey. What two mules? I don't know. If
I've ever met a mule, I don't have. I've ever

(18:41):
seen one or pet one. Are they are mules? Are
they friendly? Are they do? They do? They make noise?
What's going on there? So mules look like beefy looking horses,
but they're strong and sturdy and and but they have
the speed of a horse, so they're good farm animals,

(19:05):
like workers. But they can't have kids. So you got
to keep having the donkey and the horse get together.
But if you have two mules in twenty years, however
long they live, you're gonna have no mules. That's pretty sad, actually,
you know it. I'm kind of upset by this. I
knew it ruined your day. Well, but you know what,
you're the mule of this podcast. How am I a mule?

(19:29):
Because you have big, strong legs and you have no
kids and you're you're sometimes an ass. So here you go. Hey,
when we come back, I want to update everybody on
the move out fee situation because a lot of people
have talkbacks on that. Oh it's fantastic. And by the way,

(19:50):
I'm promising again, but I mean it. I am not
getting off this podcast. I'll tell you a story about
So in two breaks we'll get you've heard Scary and Bootie. Okay,
so when we last left me, when last we left
our heroes? Exactly what was going through my brain? And gee, Rockie,

(20:12):
is that mid Atlantic fifties speak? Everybody talks that that was?
That was Rocky, Rocky and Bullwinkle my last left right,
right right. Why do people talk like that in movies
in the fifties and the sixties, because that's the way
they talk, gentlemen, that's talk like this and broadcast. Oh
what a terrible thing to Hindenburg. Oh the humanity. It

(20:33):
was like a stick that they were doing. Did they
imagine if the hint the Hindenburg happened? Now holy ship.
The fucking get my phone right this ship? Did people
talk like that in real life? They walked around talking
like this? Uh hey, sweetheart, Yeah, I don't. I don't know.
They don't make movies and people walking around normal they're
in the movies. A couple of things. First of all,

(20:57):
did we ever do we address the CEO of McDonald's.
And then it's an old story, No, we had, it's
a lot. It's an old story, but it's fantastic. All
of the spoof videos are terrific, right, the ceo, this
was the CEO of McDonald's. This was a couple of
weeks ago now, and uh, film the video of him
trying the new product? What was it? The big Arch?
The big Arch calling it a product? Right, he called

(21:19):
it a product. I have I have a conspiracy theory
about that. I'm thinking that they did that on purpose,
knowing they would go viral and going with the no
press is bad press bit. I actually think they purposely
purposefully filmed a video to be that way, saying this

(21:40):
is gonna be so cornballish, that this is gonna and
guess what mission accomplished, and the jokes on us. That's
what I honestly think. I don't think that a PR
team and so many people that get paid really well
at that McDonald's corporation would allow a video to get
out there that made their CEO look like a schmuck

(22:04):
on purpose, you know, unless it was on purpose. I
thought there's no way, there's no way that it could
get past everybody, and no one person said this is
kind of cornball, man, I don't know. That's why I
think it was done with intent. You don't, you're not
falling the ball. You don't believe no, because I think

(22:24):
the guy is so cornball, and I think if he
thought he did it deliberately because he's not enjoying it.
He's not making it look good, right, But what I'm
but no, No, it's I saw this video. The people
that made the video also saw that. So there's no
women and they say it like, oh my god, this
is But I also think that, like that's why this

(22:45):
is gonna work. This is no. I'll tell you why
it's not. Because all the other burgers looked better because
somebody biting into a big whopper. The Burger King ceo
and all the other chains that were biting in that
their burgers looked better. This guy was like, it made
me feel like if I ordered the big Arch, I
would be a dufis ordering a big arch. He didn't

(23:06):
make it look good. He didn't make it sound good.
And I don't think he's clever enough being the dork
that he is. I think he's just dorky and that's
what he did right. But even if you're a dork,
you still have people around you. You still have people
filming this, people writing the script, people that are people
editing it. There has to be about there has to
be about eighty people on the prod team. You need

(23:28):
to tell me that eighty people. Not one person of
the eighty people that were on this team that released
his video thought for a second to say something or
raise their hand and be like, I'm telling you this
doesn't look right. I'm telling you guys, maybe we should
try it this way, or you look too stiff. Why
are you calling it a product? Let's change the door. No,

(23:50):
that's because I think it was done on purpose. I
think the fall in on it. I think when you're
in power, whether it's a just leave it a generic,
but when you're a politician or a CEO or a
star athlete. I think you get surrounded by yes men
who tell you that looks good on you, sir, that

(24:13):
would be a good thing to do. That's you should
definitely do that. And I think they didn't want to
tell him he looked like a dork. How do you
tell the CEO? You know you're coming off little door,
you know, I don't think that bite looks like a
normal man would take a bite like that. So everybody anymore,
everybody thought it and nobody and they allowed it to
be released, and they're like this. I think he surrounds
himself with the kind of people that wouldn't think there

(24:33):
was anything wrong with that video. In other words, he's
not surrounding himself with you and me. He surrounds himself
with small town yokels. No offense to small town YO people,
but this yokels in general, not small town people like
who like you know, sir, Yeah, looks great because that
guy's a small you know what you mind? He reminded
me of what's the guy's name from thirty rock the page? Oh, oh,

(25:00):
what's his other? I forgot his name? The page? You know,
he's I could see his face, he's done so many bits. Oh,
Jack mcjack Jack. Yeah, he reminded like like Jack mcbrown, God,
oh my god, this is delicious. This product is I
don't think he knows how to really. I think rich people,
the people that run companies, a lot of them. I

(25:21):
don't think that guy has ever been hanging out with
his boys at a white castle stacking empty boxes in
the parking right, Like, I don't think he's like, I'm
gonna get myself a burger. He's not talking like a person.
He's talking like a robot. And I think the people
around him it didn't. They didn't pick up on it
because to them it sounded normal. Yeah, product, it's a
great product. That's how they talk it in the in
the in the conference room. This is a great product.

(25:43):
It's one of our best products. He looked so people
look so awkward, and he took it. He tried to
take a big bite. It was the smallest bite ever. Anyway,
if he if you haven't seen it, I'm hoping I'm
assuming everybody who listens to this podcast saw that. That's
why we didn't go. We didn't. We didn't set it up.
But yes, the spoofs are hilarious. Everything that came after it.

(26:07):
But hey, speaking of things to watch, did you watch
the oscars? I did. I thought they were pretty good.
Thought there was some Yeah, they're pretty good. Some dance
numbers retracting the mic from people the mic just goes
down into the floor and that they don't have to
Brody No no relation Adam Brody or no, what's the

(26:27):
other Brody. The thing is if you if you're receiving
an award and you got three of those statues up there,
you got to expect that three people are going to
say something into that microphone. Yeah, but if you're like,
you don't make one person go and then cut the
other two on, you're right. But if you get an
award for like sound design, you get thirty seconds because

(26:47):
ultimately it's about the audience watching and being entertained. I'm
sure you did a great job, but I'm sorry, I
want to see the celebrities and whatever. Anyway, two or
three times, but both of them were Netflix shows. I
don't know if you noticed that that they it was
a Netflix thing. They cut off to people twice. Oh,
I don't know if that was coincidence or not. But
if they weren't big stars, like, you're not going to
cut off the director of the Year. You're not gonna

(27:09):
cut off the people for Best Picture, right. So anyway,
so I was on Facebook and I was in a
uh it was an article about the Oscars, right, popped
up in my feed, and this woman writes, you mean
there are people that actually watch the Oscars. And she's
one of these people that puts this laughing emoji after
her joke, like like she because she thinks it's funny. Yeah,

(27:30):
that's celebrity. Know it's funny. So I wrote, Yeah, the
fact that you're devoid of culture doesn't warrant a happy face.
And I put a smiling face. I go, I said,
the Oscars are a celebration of art and and and
and and talent, and uh, you know what, there was
some good dance numbers and music. I enjoyed it so
so so somebody wrote in response to this woman, more

(27:54):
people watched than you think. Now, the woman said, she's imployed.
Nobody watched the Oscars, so obviously more people watch than
she thinks. It's a stupid response. The guy's like, oh,
more people than you think. Yeah, she thinks nobody watched.

(28:14):
You see what I mean. It's just a dumb Facebook thing.
So just it just bothered me, that's all. It bothered me.
I got one more Facebook stupidity feel yeah face. Okay.
So I'm in a comic book group on Facebook and
somebody nerd. Somebody took a Spider Man comic book cover

(28:37):
and used AI to animate it. So it was Spider
Man like in a sewer with water flowing, and they
used AI to make the water flow. So this person said,
oh my god, someone should make comics that move. How
great would that be? Which I wrote, you mean like
like a cartoon. That's a cop that's comic book that

(29:00):
moves is a cartoon? Wow? And then somebody wrote, I
have an idea, they should call it a movie. So
I just so, all right, my apartment, I moved out
of my old place. I'm an og been there for
nineteen years and old gue. As I'm on my way

(29:22):
out the door, they walk they whacked me with a
five hundred dollars move out feet which is non refundable.
This isn't the one that protects the elevator and the
destruction of the place. That No, that was that was
a special thousand dollars security deposit, which I got back
right that makes sense. Yeah, this is a fucking money
grab on your way out the door. Now, as an

(29:44):
OG owner who's been there for all these years, I
had a problem with it. And you know I shouldn't
have figured I figured out why they charged you, But
go on, I not loud. I got loud with the
manager of the facility. He's a manager's property. But this
it was more. No. I got in his I was
in his office, and I was hot. I've never I

(30:05):
can't believe I was yelling and I got to the
level I did. But I and I and I said
to him, sir, just so you know, this is not
me yelling at you, which is the truth. I'm just
venting because I'm so upset and I and I'm sorry,
but you're the person, you're the front lines here. I
gotta say something to you, because if I'm passionate about

(30:26):
this to you, You're gonna get to the people that
make these decisions and be passionate and share and carry
my passion. And that's really why I got upset. And
and but but the audacity of this executive board, who
these are people now that have been in the in
that building for three maybe three four years to make

(30:48):
these blanket decisions and say, after you have lived there
the rules right when I when I moved in nineteen
years ago, there was no move out fee, and if
there was, it might have been one hundred dollars whatever
it was. But my my argument was I should be
paying two thousand and seven prices because I'm a two

(31:09):
thousand and seven guy. I'm like, the longer I stay,
the more I pay. Makes no sense. I said, did
you ever did you ever go to the meetings or vote?
I think I went to one meeting. It was stupid,
So maybe partially on you right now, it could be,
but I think it's I'm not I don't make the rules.
These people that have been here for three you don't
vote three or four years made the rules and they

(31:30):
decided to put this rule in. I said, you know,
what would make sense if maybe the people that have
been here the least amount of time pay the most
because they're the ones that should be suffering the effects
they moved in at a later date. And not only that,
what about people who rent or sublet those people, people
who move in every six months or a year. The yes,

(31:53):
I pay a big maintenance fee, and it's only doubled
since I've been here. So my guess is the five
hundred dollars move out fee is a case you don't
sell your apartment for a month or two then not
getting the monthly fee. Oh, yes they are. I'm paying
for that. I'm not living there a month now, and
I'm still paying my monthly maintenance fee. I saw.

Speaker 1 (32:12):
That.

Speaker 2 (32:12):
I still live at that address until that apartment is
out of my name. I paid my mortgage on it,
and I pay my so I pay my maintenance fee
on it. So why don't you let tol Darren give
him a key, let him put an inflatable bed at
that He said, get his own apartment. That's what he
said at the beginning of his podcast, were get his
own apartment. Doesn't give him a small TV with a
fire stick. Let him have his own world. He's got

(32:33):
a refrigerator, can bring girls back to the apartment. Whatever
you want to do, brouh, have fun, have a party. No,
but yeah no, so so I I you know. Anyway,
I got a phone call from the boss's boss's boss
who runs the region and all the management and a
lot of buildings. He was very cordial to me. He
was he was a good man. He got on the
phone with me and he said, look, Ollie Brown. He uh.

(32:56):
The the situation was explained, the know we're gonna you know,
we'll we'll we'll figure we'll figure something out. So did
they ever give you a notice, like a year ago, Hey,
we're making this change. Uh, I'm sorry, what did they
did they send out notices when they made this change
a year ago? I don't remember. There was never any
announcement anyway, And they didn't claim to have told you.

(33:17):
They didn't say, like, mister scary, we told you. I
think they're gonna work with me or make sure that
whatever I pay is appropriate for the time that I
was there. But the point is like, just I couldn't
let that. I couldn't be silent on that. And I'm
a silent guy, and I let a lot go by
the wayside as you and the slices know, that really

(33:39):
got burned my bippy. As they say in the fifties,
what's yeah, seventies a right, But anyway, seventies that's the
that's the conclusion to that, where they're where they're gonna
work with me, we'll figure something out. It doesn't sound
like the full five hundred is gonna be paid. But
we'll we'll, I'll keep you updated on that. So well,
speaking of honey and yelling, I have still not gotten

(34:02):
from the people that brought you metal shop thing in
my mouth in the trail mix. They have not sent
me the insulated packet. To send it. They said, well,
it could take up to you know, three weeks. What
part of America you located. It takes three weeks to
send an envelope. So I still don't have it. So
just update you. No money, nothing, They still haven't identified it.

(34:22):
They give me to run around rounded rounds, all right, Yeah,
blues traveler, there you go. No, actually, I was thinking
I was doing Van Halen van Halenn the for Unlawful
Carnal Knowledge album, which is an anagram for fuck. Yeah
fuck album nineteen ninety two. Yeah, what else? Are we

(34:45):
taking a break? Are we going to? Is it time?
All right? No, we don't have time to take a break.
I can tell you about the chili cheese burrito. This
is gonna blow your mind, scary. Oh no, no, it's
time to take a break, damn it. All right, the
Glynn Boys Podcast.

Speaker 1 (34:57):
We will be right back.

Speaker 2 (34:59):
Oh, by the way, I was told that I've been
shorting us on the commercials for you know, for iHeart.
You know, I'm not putting enough. Well, when we do
slice time, sometimes it's only two or three at three
three times we take the break. Oh whoa, let's not
get in trouble. Well, I'll tell you right now. They

(35:21):
put it in automatically. Oh okay, they've inserted They've inserted it.
So yeah, so so so yeah, we we have to
play all ab out commercial breaks. Oh can I speak
about iHeart for a second? Oh, well you could. I
just have about several seconds. Okay. Now, keep in mind,
I don't work for iHeart, but our podcast is an
iHeart Radio podcast and it's still part of the family.
So they had the podcast awards, right yep, I Heart Radio.

(35:45):
So not only did they have the Hear Heart Radio
Podcast Awards, of which we were not nominated since our
first the first year. Now it's all celebrities. I feel like,
now I'm looking back at that, I think that was
like a pity vote or something. No, it was because
they hadn't signed all the big celebrities at that point, right,
and we had a top five podcast in the whole
company we did. That was back in the Dark Ages
in mid we did second to Joe Rogan MIDI five times. Yeah,

(36:06):
they let they put it. Joe Rogan wasn't an employee,
but they're like, let's put him into comedy category and
hadn't show up for the award. We showed up. Listen,
We've got a free flight to La It was terrific
twenty nineteen anyway, So naturally, I don't think anyone that
works for the company was nominated, which is unfortunate, but
a more importantly we weren't nominated, and they put up
video footage on the iHeartRadio account on social media. Did

(36:29):
you know, scary there was an iHeartRadio Podcast Awards hotel. Yes,
I heard about this. It was just for the nominees.
It was branded and that had studios you could broadcast
from there. And crazy Food. Yeah, and I'm going to
go on a limb here living large big budgets. Of

(36:50):
all the podcasts in iHeartRadio that are still going, we
have one of the oldest. We really do, Carla Mari
and Anthony My Day Friday. They're not doing that anymore,
all right, Nope, So that's it. And uh and uh
uh what was acquired taste, not doing it anymore. Gone now,
I can't speak for the whole company. We well, we turned.

(37:11):
We were on the ten years old soon, right, we've
been here for nine years at this point, nine years
in July. I know here it's a big deal. Yeah,
and we were not invited to the podcast Hotel. You know,
we got we had gots and ghoul gots and we
got o gots gots. Now listen, it's been seven years

(37:35):
since they invited us to an award show. Right now again,
i'mout a full time member of the company anymore. That's fine.
Still friends, still doing the podcast. I feel like at
least the podcast sh look, don't want to nominate us,
at least give us some time at the podcast Hotel. Hey,
here are two of our longest serving in house podcasters. Yes,

(37:58):
who are busting or ass for iHeart promoting the iHeart
talk Back. We do a talkback episode every week. Nobody
does that. Nobody doesn't the talkback episode, an episode dedicated
to just talkbacks. We do that. Where is the love
Black Eyed Peas? Yeah, Bob John, you know, let's let's go.

(38:19):
They're not the podcast guys. We gotta we gotta go
to the other side of the what's the guy's name,
Colton Connall, Connall, He's got his name for a minute, Connall.
I love Condall. I love Connall, love Connall. I just
drew a blank. Guys. Connall's a great Connall. You know
his last name, don't say it, but Connall is a
great guy. Connall b's be he runs, he runs ship.
He is the man, he's the top. All the guys

(38:41):
in the iron Heart podcast totem pole, all of the
all the guys in the podcast department are good people.
I had great relationships with them. We were there. Let's
have the listen. We'll promote it on social listen. We're
not calling O'Brien. I get it. We're not call her daddy.
I get it. Yeah, but you know we're family. So
I would like I would like. I would like a

(39:01):
couple of nights stay at the iheartrate of a podcast
hotel and listen. We don't have to go in the
podcaster is there? We can go now. You can fly
us out there next week. A couple of weeks from now,
when Scary is on vacation, we'll go to the podcast hotel.
It's down at the end of lonely street. Thought, so
something happened to me in an uber? I don't know
if unless you have something right here? Do you want

(39:23):
to talk about it?

Speaker 1 (39:23):
No?

Speaker 2 (39:24):
I just I wanted to talk about the chili cheese
burrito auber. Okay, this is this is quick. So the
other night I get into an uber. It was a
woman driver and baby car seat in the back. And
were we get to talking? No, there was not when
we get to talk, although a great deal of them
do have that, so we get to talk. Okay, but

(39:45):
you got into a car once that had a baby
car seat with a baby in it, because it wasn't
the uber right now, this was an uber? Okay, okay,
this was an Uber and she's like, yeah, we're talking
and she and then I said, yeah, so this and
that and the other thing, and how my ethnicity comes up.
I'mn Italian American and she goes, oh, I knew that already.
I said, well, how did you know I was Italian?

(40:06):
And then I'm thinking, well, she saw my name was Anthony.
I said, was it my name? She said no. She
goes eyebrows. When you're approaching the car, I can just
tell you Italian. You walk Italian yeah, And I'm like,
wait a second, what she goes, Oh, yeah, she goes,
she goes, yeah. I said, what is what does walk

(40:27):
Italian mean? She's I don't know. Italians walk a certain way.
I said, okay, so is it? Is it like a swagger?
Is it kind of like a like a tony soprano
like a Apparently apparently different ethnicities have different ways of walking,
and just you can just visualize it, she said. She says, oh,
I knew right away when you were walking up to

(40:49):
the car you were Italian, just by the way you walked.
All right, So I'm not gonna make a reference to
the Italian who lives in Oklahoma. You're like, oh, yeah,
we got an Italian in Oklahoma. No, no talking about
New York. New Jersey tries to area Italians. You walk
with your shoulders back, You look a little up, like
your chin is up a little bit. You have an
attitude like hey, I'm walking here, and probably when she

(41:09):
pulled up, you looked at her like, oh, where you're going?
You pulled up too far and I gotta walk three
extra feet. You have a you have Italian Americans in
this area have a way about them like, oh, there's
my fucking car, here's my fuck. You walk Italian? I mean,
do you walk like an Italian? Because Brody, you walk Jewish?

(41:30):
What does that mean? I walk like an Italian? No,
I'm just thinking I do I walk like an Italian?
Don't forget one's of nationality, scary ones of religion. Well,
I know, just why do you walk? Do you walk? What? Polish? Russian?
What do you walk? Uh? I walk? I walked the dinosaur. No,
I I walk like an Italian. I just told you.

(41:51):
I walk like the Italian people in Benson Hursts. I
grew up with so then fallacy there. Then if you've
got in her rubers, you would have mistaken you for
being Italian. But I don't look Italian. You would have
looked at me like, oh you grew up inn italighborhood.
Like yeah, anyway, I want to hear if you slices,
if you have an ethnicity, then you have a wattle.
You have a wattle. Describe your ethnicity and describe what

(42:13):
it means to walk that way? What does it look
like when you walk? You walk like you walk like
you had a few Is a Cuban? Is there a
Cuban walk? Puerto Rican can imagine I would imagine, yeah,
imagine there's a yeah, I would imagine. I got no
problem with that. Speaking of Hispanics, back to my chili
cheese burrito conversation. Nice you like that. Yeah, so not

(42:35):
not that most actual Hispanics eat at Taco Bell. But
you know what I'm saying, it's text mex I know.
So I've I've talked about this on the podcast. You know.
A couple of months ago. They brought the chili cheese
burrito back right for a limited time, but then in
New Jersey, in my area of New Jersey, they got
rid of it. It was temporary and the guy who was
gonna give me a bag of a ten pound bag
of seasoning, a five pound whatever it was. Anyway, I'm

(42:57):
fiending for a chili cheese breedo. They don't have it.
So I'm like, you know what. Every time I asked them,
they go, uh, certain franchises carry it. So I googled,
you know, uh, where can I find a chili cheese brito?
Did you know? Scary? There's a website called Livingmoss dot
com and it has a chili cheese burrito locator and

(43:18):
you can put in you put in a zip code. Look,
I'll hold it up on the screen. Look, this is
a map of all of the chili cheese burritos in America,
of all the stores that sell it. Now, I can
drive to Southern Jersey or out to Long Island, but
my area of North Jersey. Nowhere in North Jersey do
they sell chili cheese burritos. But if you're a fan

(43:40):
like I am, livingmoss m as spit dot com, is
that a Taco Bell offshoot of a website? Yeah? Yeah,
I believe Taco Bell. Uh, you know, created it so
they let people know. But here's the thing. Here's my question.
If you know that chili cheese burritos are so in

(44:01):
demand that you have a website to help people find them,
you should make that standard. But here's the thing. I
guess their research shows that North Jersey doesn't love the
chili cheese brito. Yeah. Well, I don't understand. It's such
a niche product though, Like if anything, I would think
there would be an app for like hot dogs or
pizza or bagels like chili. Because it's an item Ataco

(44:24):
Bell that people like. It's no different. Okay, here's another
thing for you. But you're looking for chili cheese burritos
at any store or just Taco Bell. No, I'm looking
for Taco Bell chili cheese burritos. Yes, I'm looking for
a Taco Bell. If I go to Wendy's and I
want to I want a frosty, I want a frosty Finder.
Now they sell them at every Unday. Okay, So it's
an inhausting Only I'm thinking that you can't find a

(44:46):
chili cheese burrito anywhere in the area. So you can
find a burrito with chili and cheese. This is a
Taco Bell item that has certain sneezoning and they're chili.
Why is that not national? Why is it a regional thing? Well,
I'll ask you know. Okay, here's the question for you,
and I won't see how many slices before I give
the answer. Slices? How many of you did you know
the answer to this? If you look on the menu

(45:08):
McDonald's dot com of what they put on their burgers,
the Big Max, the uh, the quarter pounder with cheese,
or the regular cheeseburgers? Right, do you know what's different
about the New York Tri State area burgers and anywhere
else in the country, hold on slices. I'm gonna give

(45:29):
you a few seconds to think about it. Dude. There's
an ingredient that they don't put on the burger automatically,
and you have to ask for it national style if
you want it. What is mustard? Mustard? Yes, mustard? Trysted

(45:49):
area doesn't put mustard mustard on everyone else? Does? They
put mustard on the beat, not mustard on the beat? Oh?
In fact, yeah, So that's because the taste buds, the culture,
the cuisine of this area doesn't want ketchup and mustard

(46:10):
together on their burger. So if you go to a
place outside of the New York Tristan area, you didn't
know that you might be on like a road trip
to Florida. You walk into South Carolinia, give me a cheeseburger,
They're like, well, what the what the fuck is this
mustard doing on here? Right? Well, I wonder if it's
like that everywhere though, I mean, is there another area
that's just ketchup? No? I don't believe, so I'll ask

(46:31):
I don't. I think I looked and said, no, what
areas of the country Donald's mustard? This is all good
stuff city, including Manhattan Brooklyn, Queens, Bronx and Staten Island
and parts of Long Island. McDonald's typically doesn't put mustard
on burgers customers there ketchup a regional preference, but they

(46:53):
put both in other parts of the Yeah, ketchup and mustard,
which I can't even So if you like your mustard,
you're gonna have to ask for it special. So I know,
I grew up in the right neighborhood. No mustard in
my in my burgers. Okay, So we're gonna take a
break and I'll come back and tell you how I
almost had security called on me. See it right here,
we got some time? No, no, how many more breaks

(47:16):
do we have? We have? We have one more after this?
But uh, all right, well, well let's continue. I got
some more more ship for you. I got some more
ship too. But I'll i you know, I'll do the
story as long as it doesn't give us a two
minute break coming up next Well, no, no, we'll save
yours for a last Okay, but but I'm definitely doing it.
Of course you are. We're gonna come right back out

(47:37):
of the break with your story, I promise. Now, all right,
what about all right? This is this is a lazy
man thing. First of all, you know I hired an
interior designer for my place, my favorite Swanson dinners. By
the way, Yes, you hide an interior is hungry man. What? Oh,
I'm sorry, sorry, what did you think? I said? I

(47:58):
know he sounds making a joke. You said, lazy, lazy
man my favorite spots. So I have a person helping
me out. She's awesome, and she said, scary, you will
be getting some greenery in your place. You must have plants.
So apparently I started looking into this, and there are
different plants for different moods and different rooms. So they

(48:21):
said you should get a snick. Don't laugh. Apparently you
want a snake plant for your bedroom. All right again
insert joke here. It helps you sleep because each plant
releases different things, if you know what I'm saying. And
I guess it helps you to sleep better. And so
there are certain plants that belong in certain parts of

(48:41):
your house or apartment. And and I'm not listen, I'm
not gonna poo poo the plant thing. I do think.
I think it's time that I grow up and I
have some kind of responsibility to water something, although you
can't keep it a lie, right, you know, I can't
even keep it practice alive. But I'll tell you. I'll

(49:02):
say this, you had a plastic tree that died. That's
how bad you are.

Speaker 1 (49:05):
You know.

Speaker 2 (49:06):
Obviously the in the algorithm starts serving you the ads
that because your phone here's you talk. I was getting
ads on Instagram in between the stories for self watering plants.
How cool is that? It's a thing? Brody you themselves. No, No,
these are these cool fucking plants you get. I think

(49:28):
I'm gonna order. These are the kind of plants that
are gonna be in my house. You fill it up
once a month. You basically it has a side, a
little side door jam, and you pour the water in
the side and then the water distributes what it needs
to the plant little by little over the month, and
you don't have to come. It's like filling up a

(49:49):
water tank. And then you are the laziest human being
on the planet. I'm I'm probably gonna pay triple for
a plant, but of course you are. It's a self
watering plant. This is amazing. I want to be able
to have things that like like, for instance, I'm fighting
with her over this over over what's going into my
bedroom in the studio. She wants to like all these

(50:13):
open shelves and I could put my old radios on
there and make a really cool studio office, right, which
is great. I like that. I like it. Yeah, I'm like, now,
fuck that, that's gotta be encased in glass. I said,
I don't want any dust. I don't want a dust.
No the shell. You have to dust the glass, dude,
Things on shelves collect dust. I don't want that. I

(50:35):
want life. I wanted to be. I want easy street. No,
I want to want that that dust moves away every
couple of days. I said, No, these are gonna be
in a display case. This way, there's no dust. You
have a cleaning lady, don't you. Yeah, but she's short.
Oh she doesn't. She never ever ever cleaned above five

(50:57):
feet tall anywhere. You saw my old apartment by a
ladder or step stool for her. I have one. She
still doesn't get up there heights. I don't know, you
know in my old place. Wait a minute, wa wait
wait wa wait wait wait wait a minut, wait a minute,
wait a minit minute. You have to double the price
you pay on now, right, yep? Me double? So not happy? Bad, it,

(51:18):
but no, of course, mister Scary wanted two and a
half bathrooms. Mister Scary has to pay up now, Yes
Scary does, and I do, and I'm okay with it.
I guess I have technically should be paying her two
and a half times as much more bathrooms. Well, anyway,
so anyway, with with with love, with love. So in
my old place, all the tops of my doorframes were

(51:41):
always filthy with dust because she didn't reach that high.
If only there was some way that you could have
cleaned them with, like a feather on a stick, like
a duster on a stick, if only there was some way. Yeah,
and then the dust goes on the floor. Dust doesn't settle,
It flies all over the place and then lands on
other things. You know, you gotta get that out with
a vacuum. I didn't way. I don't want open shelves

(52:02):
because it's just gonna invite more dust. Do you agree.
I don't have a lot of open shelves. I did have,
like we had glass curios like cabinets that we put
stuff in with a glass door. That we didn't have
a lot of open shelves. I guess the dusting my
parents did. And yet I had a lot of dust.

(52:24):
My father had like VHS tapes on shells lands on
horizontal services, not not verticals. Oh no, you'll get dust
on the glass, absolutely, dude. Snow lands on verticals and
you're gonna have to wind dexter g and then your
lights are gonna like shine on the glass and won't

(52:44):
be able to see what's in the case. You like,
I can't see. I hate the glare. You want to
you wanna quick? Facebook Marketplace story always. Oh by the way, proty,
I got stuff that's backing up here. You gotta you
gotta come over. I know well, you know what. You
can meet me halfway somewhere, all right there, dad, Fergie, yeah,

(53:04):
Rocket at the line had a Black Eyed Peas song. No,
it's meet me halfway. What song is that? It's either
it's is either Fergie solo or Black Eyed Peas. That's
black Eyed Peas, Gonna meet me halfway? All right anyway? Yeah,
two songs. Okay. So I'm selling something for eight hundred dollars.

(53:26):
That's very a piece of furniture. It's a big thing, okay,
and it's it's worth money new like what you do,
scary new. It's like fifteen, sixteen, seventeen hundred dollars. Okay,
I'm selling it. I'm asking about eight hundred for it. Okay.
So this person, now, I live in New Jersey, North Jersey.
Everybody knows that. You know, So do you live in

(53:47):
northern Jersey? Yep? This person says, can you deliver it?
I'm in Merrick Long Island that is two hours away
and multiple bridges, and the bridges are all like twelve
thirteen dollars, So it would cost me like fifty bucks
in gas tolls, gas and tolls and a four hour

(54:08):
round trip to deliver something. Who would even have the
balls to ask if I could deliver something like that,
a big, heavy piece of thing. I mean, someone who
is an idiot stupid. I had more harsh words for
that person, but they could have said, listen, I'll give
you seventy five dollars if you'll deliver it. I'd be like, oh,

(54:29):
I'll consider that, which I can. It's too big to
fit in my car, but I, oh, can you deliver it? No,
that's not how Facebook works. I'm at a company. So
then you tell me this person has a life. This
person says, I don't know where scer. I don't know
who they are. They didn't say they were interested. They said,

(54:49):
I can bet my life on it. This won't sell
for three hundred dollars eight hundred bucks. You are insane, buddy,
that's it. He took time out of his life tell
me that he'll bet his life. I said, dude, I'm
praying it sells eight hundred dollars, so you lose your bet.

(55:12):
I mean, yeah, what it's fifteen hundred to seventeen hundred
dollars new, and I'm selling it in perfect condition eight
hundred dollars. Now you want to. By the way, there's
a new feature on Facebook Marketplace. You can have a no.
You can have AI respond for you. So mine says

(55:35):
so on this thing I'm selling, I have it. I
have it automatically respond with the price is not negotiable.
I don't know how big your car is. You've got
to measure your own car. And the measurements to this
item are in the listing. All the common thing. Oh,
the first thing I write is yes, it's available, No
need to ask. The price is non negotiable. Measure your

(55:57):
own car. I don't know how big your car is.
It's your car. And then if says, the measurements are
in the listing, so I don't have to deal with
that shit anymore. It's the greatest thing. They also they're
also probably factoring in. I'm like, this guy's a real dick.
Maybe I don't want to buy his shit. No, I'm
pleasant about it. I mean as pleasant as David Brody

(56:17):
can be. By the way, I pleasant on your behalf.
There's a shirt I saw on Amazon. I want to
get it, but I'm wondering slices. What do you think
especially my pickleball slices or anyone that goes to a
gym of any kind and plays sports, you know, indoors,
that's whatever it is. That's me, Like you go to
yoga class or spin classing like that. I found a

(56:38):
shirt it says I'm the nicest asshole you'll ever meet.
Do you think I should be allowed? Because when I
go to pick a ball on Sunday, I'm gonna ask
if it's okay to wear that shirt to pickle ball.
I think it's very fitting. Yes, in more ways than one.
It's very appropriate. You speak nice, I'm gonna ask, Oh,
but I'm nice. So speaking of the gym, you know

(57:00):
who I was working out with next two today. I
mean I didn't talk to him, but now you obviously
you know Jack Harlow works out at the gym that
I'm at. Yeah, yeah, Jake chillen Hall. No, so I
come to find and who's he working out with? Sebastian
Stan So no, no, no, those are two people from

(57:21):
the Marble universe. It gets it gets even better. So
it's Bucky. Yeah. So apparently not only does Jack Harlow
go to this gym and Sebastian Stan and Jake chillen
Hall a regular member. But my trainer said to me,
yeah he goes. I guess you know, you know, you're
not here in the afternoons. But Pedro Pascal also a

(57:43):
member of this gym, also a member of the MC.
Always read Richards and the Fantastic Four. By the way,
Jake jillen Hall was mysterio in Spider Man Brand New
Day and or or or whatever, the last third one.
And he said, in about an hour or so, you'll
be gone. Emma Stone is coming in. Because Emma Stone

(58:05):
is coming in because uh, you know, she may join
the gym. So the word is spreading that this is
the gym for celebrities. Anyway, that being said, I was
trying to stretch my workout as long as I could
because I wanted to be there for Emma, but she
she didn't show up. All I was there. Emma Stone

(58:27):
was in uh spider Man, one of the Spider Man movies,
but not in the MCU it was. It was with
Sony Spider Man. But that's close. Yeah? Is that cool?
I had the whole universe working out with me at
that Dude, Okay, I would like to meet Jake Jillen Hall,
but Sebastian stand for me is on another level. He
was He's Bucky, He's the Winter Soldier. Bro. Yeah, you

(58:48):
don't know what that means. You have no clue what
that means. So the funny part about all this is,
I didn't you invite them over to your new house
to wind tasting rules? So Jake I recognized, did not
recognize Sebastian in fact. Wow, So I told my trainer,
I'm like, I didn't know Jake's here. Jake works because yeah,
he goes, Jake, he Jake, look at my boy, Jake.

(59:09):
He goes well, because my trainer goes, oh yeah, he
works out with Sebastian Stan I'm like, oh, that's cool.
I'm like, when is he here? He goes he's in
the park and the great T shirt. I'm like what.
I'm like, oh my god, that's him. But he was wearing,
to be honest baseball hat. Yeah, be honest. If your
trainer just said, oh, he works out with Sebastian, who
would you have thought of Maniscalco? Yeah? Right, all right,

(59:31):
we'll be right back, And I would have thought of
the lobster from from uh Little Mermaid. We're not letting
Brodie off the hook. He's telling you. He's telling it.
Next the stage is all yours, David Brody. So I
walk in, I'm gonna call him out. Nordstrom Rack fucking
me again. So if you've ever been in Nordstrom Rack,

(59:54):
which is which is a discount version of Nordstrom, which
I love, Nordstrum's tremendous, nort Strum High is the best
people Nordstrom Rack. Uh, it's it's it's it's it's up
and down. Some great people there. It's not gonna disparage everybody.
It's comparative to the clothing you get. No, No, it's
all the stuff that wasn't Nordstrom that Maybe it's leftovers

(01:00:17):
or or imperfection such as their staff. Yeah, well yeah Island. Yeah,
I'm not going to disparage a lot of nice people
work there. I'm just gonna say the managers. There's not
the same manager. The problem with the last time is
another manager, not the one who told me I moved
the shirt to get a discount. You thought that was bad.

(01:00:38):
Oh no, I got accused of way it is, so
I uh bought it. I told you about a few
pairs of shoes I have. I needed shoes, nothing expensive,
and I had gotten a gift card to Nordstrom Rack,
so buy a couple of pair of shoes. So you know,

(01:00:59):
they have like like one hundred and fifty dollars one
hundred and ninety dollars shoes and they say their price
one ninety or price forty nine ninety five or seventy
nine ninety nine. They discount the shoes. So they have
really nice Calvin Klein shoes and Non Bush and Steve
Madden shoes, very expensive shoes. And then they have like

(01:01:20):
casual shoes and have their own brand. And I tend
to go for the shoes that used to be eighty
dollars and now they're like thirty nine forty dollars, fifty dollars.
Maybe because I don't spend a lot of money in shoes.
I don't have a lot of money right now, so
I needed a couple. I need a blue pair of
shoes and a gray pair of shoes. You need blue
swed shoes. Yeah, you can do anything, just don't step

(01:01:41):
on them. So I bought a blue pair of shoes
and two gray pairs of shoes. Anyone who knows me scary?
What color shirt am I wearing right now? Blue? Okay?
I pretty much wear blue and gray. Those are my colors.
You like to heather gray too? Yeah? I do like

(01:02:01):
a good heather gray T shirt. Yeah, do like a
heather gray. You're not a fan of No, no, No,
I'm not Cold Play, I don't. I hate yellow. I
absolutely hate yellow. I don't wear yellow. I hate yellow.
If it's something with a yellow stripe, I normally won't
wear it. I don't like the color yellow anyway. So
I got the one pair of blue shoes and the
two gray shoes, and I like to try them on

(01:02:22):
at home, like try them on with pants. Yeah, they
look look in the mirror and you. I slip them
on for like real quick in the store and make
sure they fit, and I go home. And then I
decide of the two gray shoes which I like better
of the blue shoes. Do I like them better than
the blue shoes I got on Amazon? I compare them
and I return the ones. I don't like the Brooklyn
gray ones best. No, I like real gray, not not

(01:02:43):
sucker gray. So I like a dark gray. That's it.
That's who. I don't wear a lot of colors, and
I used to. I don't wear a lot of red
or maroon because I was told it doesn't look at
my freckles. So I don't wear out of red or maroon.
It's a lot of blue and gray. And I also
don't wear black. I try it to, except for the the
wedding we went to where I were all black everything.
I don't wear a lot of black T shirts. And

(01:03:04):
I wear because I'm pasty white jew and the black
makes me look like a ghost. So I try to
wear dark colors, but not black. So dark blue, medium blue,
royal blue, mets blue. Of course gray. So I bore
the stuff. Okay, So I'm going back to the store
and I'm in the boxes. I got the boxes, I
got the receipt, you know, and I'm returning the blue

(01:03:26):
shoes and the gray shoes one of the pairs of
gray shoes. I kept one of the gray pair. And
I go to the registerant and the woman says, the
girl goes to ring me up, and she says, these
shoes don't match what's coming up on my screen. Now,
let me explain to you how they put the tags
on the sneakers at Nordstrom Rack. They have giant stickers

(01:03:51):
that they put on the bottom of the shoe. Okay,
especially when they're on sale. Stickers are on the bottom
of the shoe, so you can't can't walk with them.
You can't like buy them and walk around. You got
if you walk, they know you you walked in the
shoe because the stickers on the bottom.

Speaker 1 (01:04:05):
Right.

Speaker 2 (01:04:06):
Okay, the stickers are still on my shoes because I
didn't wear them outside. Sure, she says. Now, the blue shoes, scary,
were eighty nine dollars. I splurged, and I realized I
didn't want to spend that much money on blue shoes.
I got cheaper ones on Amazon. I'm returning the expensive shoes,
and the gray ones were like thirty nine forty. Okay.

(01:04:32):
So she says, the shoes for ninety or black, there's
Steve Madden. These are like Nordstrom, rack brand or whatever
brand was, whatever was eighty nine dollars, whatever it was.
A it was a nice shoe, but it wasn't a
Steve Madden whatever it was. And I go, I don't
know what to tell you. I don't wear black shoes.
I didn't buy black shoes. I bought a blue and
a gray and at the time, scary, I'm wearing my

(01:04:54):
blue jacket and a great T shirt. I go, look
at me, I wear blue and gray. Know me? Blue
and gray? You don't want Saint Patrick's day. I didn't
have a green shirt to wear. Why I wear blue
and gray. I didn't have a green shirt for Saint
Patrick Stay except my Jets shirt and they's so bad.
I didn't want to wear it. So we have blue
and gray. Okay. So she says, well, I don't have

(01:05:15):
to tell you because this is not the shoe. I
need you to return the black shoe or I have
to give you a store credit for the blue one
and that one. I have to go help fin out
how much that shoe is. But it's not eighty nine dollars,
I said, I don't have to tell you. I paid
eighty nine dollars for it. You charged me eight nine dollars.
When I rang it up, you guys didn't notice it
was popping up as a black shoe. So I don't

(01:05:36):
tell you. You guys missed it. I what do you want?
What are gonna do? She calls the manager over. The
manager says, she looks at it, she scans it. She says, sir,
you need to return the black shoe. I can't give
you ninety dollars for a forty dollars shoe. I said,
you charged me ninety dollars for a forty dollars shoe.
The nurse, I said, I know. I said that I

(01:06:00):
bought this shoe. It's ninety dollars. You know how I know?
It's blue? Blue? Look at my shoes. My shoes are blue,
my jacket's blue. My shirt's gray, so my jeans are blue.
Why did I have blue and gray ninety percent of
the time?

Speaker 1 (01:06:11):
Right?

Speaker 2 (01:06:12):
I didn't buy black shoes. I don't need black shoes.
I don't want black shoes. I didn't buy black shoes. Well, sir,
I can't give you back the ninety dollars because this
sticker is from black shoes. So I said, Wow, did
you label it wrong? Maybe someone in your store label
it wrong. No, we didn't label it wrong. I said, Well,
let me ask you a question. Look at the bottom

(01:06:34):
of that shoe. The two stickers they're on each shoe.
Are they creased? Do they looked like they were peeled
off and put on a different shoe? I said, because
if you're telling me you didn't label it wrong, and
it's out of the realm of possibility. And I said,
and I was here a couple a month ago when
you had shirts in the wrong section. It's not possible

(01:06:54):
you put the wrong sticker on the wrong shoe. No,
I said, Okay, then the only way this happened is
if I took the sticker off the black shoe and
put it on the blue shoe right without peeling it,
without crinkling it in any way. So you're accusing me
of stealing, No, I'm not. Oh yeah, yeah, Well then
you tell me, by the way that was Metallica, You

(01:07:15):
tell me, you tell me how the black sticker, the
black shoe sticker got on the blue shoe, and I'm
trying to rip you off of fifty dollars. If you're
not accusing me of doing it, had it happen, he said,
If I didn't do it, then you did it, in
which case I'd like my money back. Please. Wow. So
she says, give me that blue shoe. And she says,

(01:07:36):
I'm gonna go match that shoe, and I'm going to
find that shoe and see how much that shoe is
supposed to be. I said, I don't care how much
it's supposed to be. You charge me ninety dollars for
eighty nine dollars, so you have to return eighty nine dollars. Yep,
she says, sir, I'm gonna go check the shoe. Those
checks shoes comes back that shoe is forty five dollars.

(01:07:56):
I said that you shouldn't have charged me ninety dollars.
I'm good. Apologize to me. How do you get out
of this one? It sounds to me like they got
you nailed nailed to the wall, okay, so I said, so,
I said, the sticker on the other shoe it says
forty five. That's great, But how come you're so thorough

(01:08:18):
nobody noticed when you rang it up that I paid ninety.
If I didn't come back and return this, I would
have paid ninety dollars for a forty five dollars shoe.
It's only because I'm returning it that I see this problem.
So are you accusing me of stealing? Are you a
choosing me trying to rip you off? No? So I'm
not doing that. Okay, Then if I didn't do it. Hey,
if we're agreeing that I didn't do it, then you

(01:08:40):
did it, in which case I want my money back.
I can't do that, sir, because this isn't the shoe.
So I said, I'm not leaving until I get my
ninety dollar refund. Not gonna happen. Wow, So you're gonna
call corporate, call the store general manager. I want my money, persistent. One. Yes,
it's forty five dollars plus tax. There's no tax in America,

(01:09:02):
forty in New Jersey. Forty five dollars, right, forty nine
to forty four dollars whatever it is, forty four eighty
nine dollars right? Okay. She says, I'm getting bill, I'm
getting security, and she walks in the back to go
get security and I'm standing next. I don't give a fuck.
I didn't do anything wrong with that. This tall dude
with an a like a like a with the broccoli haircuts. Yep,

(01:09:24):
you know the broccoli in the front. Yep. He's a.
He's a. He's a he's a burner dude. He's he's
He comes over, he sees me the register. He goes,
I can help you. I said, uh, yeah, I'm doing
a return here. I just want to return these shoes.
I got the receipt right here. So he goes, all right,
So he looks at it, scans my sneakers, a shoe,

(01:09:45):
and he scans my and I put my card in,
and the girl at the regster, who richinly cheddering me ups,
going Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike. Shees, hold on, man, I'm
just finishing up with his customer. And he ignores her,
and he gives me the refund and he hands me
a gift card for the full amount. Boom. I like
a credit because I had used my gift card to
buy it. Was she gonna try and overrule him or
something or try and look no, because without the gift card,

(01:10:09):
I have the gift card in my possession. So the
manager comes back after I've got the gift card and
there's no security to be found. She couldn't find security.
That's some great fucking security Nordstrom rack. Let that be
a lesson to everybody. There is either is no security
or they go on fucking lunch break. But they weren't there.
So she goes, just, well, what are you gonna do, sir,
I'm not giving you money back. I go, it's okay.
Mike already took care of me, and I show it

(01:10:30):
a gift card. I go, I'm out of here. Thanks
for the refund. Mike, what did you do? And he's like, oh,
they'll give me a refund. So Mike, I don't know
what happened to Mike, but I got I got the
full eighty nine dollars on my on my gift card
because I walked the fuck out of that because of Mike.
You got Mike on your side. So thank you, broccoli
headed Mike. Uh uh uh uh uh what Lily, Lily?

(01:10:57):
Fuck you? Lily? Fuck you Lily. Yeah, they called security
on me. I'm out of here. Lily not her real name,
but it was with an l Boys, Brolan broc Boys
b