#373: The Miami Chic Geek

#373: Skeery was invited to his first baby shower and Brody runs down the list of the types of games and activities he can expect; The boys ask AI to analyze a live video of each of them and access how old each of them look; Brody felt awful after he thought he accidentally dipped on the check; The boys debate cash bar weddings and if it's acceptable; Grammar Police; Skeery recaps his time at the Carbone Beach event and wonders if his outfit made the cut as "Miami Chic;" Brody stole a pregnant woman's seat

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Start up Up, start Up. Brooklyn Boys, Start up, Brooklyn Boys,
start up, up up.

Speaker 2 (00:10):
They making noise, dot up, start up, dot.

Speaker 1 (00:15):
Up, Episode three seventy three. It's the Brooklyn Boys Podcast.
What's up? I'm Scary Jones. You got David Brody over here?
Oh you want to introduce yourself? I'm sorry, but I
take that back. How we discussed this on Slice. I
know I'm Scary Jones and I'm David Brody. See it's difficult.

(00:35):
You're right. I like the way that works sometimes.

Speaker 3 (00:38):
All right, now let's now let's try it the other way. Ready, Yeah, Hey,
welcome to Brooklyn. Welcome to The Brooklyn Boys Podcast, Episode
three seventy three. I'm David Brody. That's Scary Jones.

Speaker 1 (00:48):
Thank you. A man who needs no introduction, that's me. Okay,
So you don't you don't.

Speaker 3 (00:53):
You don't see any difference in that because on Slice
time I said I want to introduce myself. You're like, oh,
what's the difference.

Speaker 1 (00:58):
There's big difference.

Speaker 3 (00:59):
But I wanted to what I wanted to do the intro.
You're like, oh, we gotta move on.

Speaker 1 (01:02):
We gotta move on.

Speaker 3 (01:03):
It saves time, does it?

Speaker 1 (01:06):
Yeah? I guess. Oh, how much time we've wasted now exactly, Well,
isn't that what we do for a living? We waste time?
This is true.

Speaker 3 (01:14):
Hey, a quick update.

Speaker 1 (01:16):
We've got new listeners. What's going on? Oh my god,
I'm nervous, I'm naked, I feel embarrassed.

Speaker 3 (01:21):
I don't know what to say. Okay, So since we
put the new episodes in the Elvis Duran Morning Show folder,
we are now on the road. Well, last week's episode
almost tripling our listenership. Tripling the listeners now that means
been our first week. Yeah, that means we.

Speaker 1 (01:41):
Have to keep them interested, right, you have to keep
them coming back and and by us gloating or sitting
here and wallowing in it, maybe some tune out. But yeah,
it does require some pause and some thank you, and
some gratitude for checking us out.

Speaker 3 (01:58):
Some welcome aboard. So if you're new to us, you listen.
We always used to say listen from zero, start at
the beginning. Now we have two hundred and seventy something episodes.
So here's what I say. Go back and listen to
the first ten to get a gist of how we
started and how things came about. And then when scary
takes one of his many many vacations. We're gonna handpick

(02:19):
one of our favorite old episodes and posted in the
Elvis drandfolder. But people who have not gone back to
the very beginning, and for those of you who've heard
them all multiple times, it'll be a little bonus for
you in case you want to hear an old throwback.

Speaker 1 (02:32):
Right. I mean we've come a long way. I mean
we started from the bottom. Now we're here, Drake Drake. However,
a couple of things you need to know. We always
say listen in order, so if you can, that'd be great,
so you get all the jokes. But also we have
a merchandise store, so if you find that you love
our podcast, we've got merchandise with our logos and names
on them. Scary.

Speaker 3 (02:52):
What's that web address? That will be Brooklynboys dot Big
Cartel dot com. That's Brooklyn Boys dot Big Cartel dot com.
Support your new favorite podcast.

Speaker 1 (03:02):
Ye buy a little tank top and uh send us
a picture of you in your tank top and we'll
repost it. How about that?

Speaker 3 (03:10):
Yeah? Or or a small hat or one of the
funny shirts or a hoodie.

Speaker 1 (03:15):
No want I want to see tank tops. It's summer men,
and women, just women. That seems I'm fucking around. I'd
like to see everybody. Yeah, you know, check out our
merch check out our merch store. There you go anyway,
so there you go. Yeah, I'm really really excited, really excited, Brodie,

(03:36):
big weekend coming up.

Speaker 3 (03:38):
Why is that? What do you have you going to
buy light fixtures or light switch?

Speaker 1 (03:43):
I got I got an earfull on that about the
light fixtures. Right, so we're not we're not talking at
light fixtures. We're not talking about cover plates, we're not
talking about Yeah, none of that. No, this weekend area rugs, No,
got nothing to do with home improvement. But I wanted
your take on this. I'm going to my first ever.

(04:05):
You're wrong, that's my take. No, the's had nothing to do.
It is not a decision I made.

Speaker 3 (04:12):
Oh I'm going you go to your first watch bris.

Speaker 1 (04:15):
No co ed baby shower. I've never been to a
baby shower in my life. Why am I? Why am
I starting now yet? Well? Meaning like men and women
were invited. Now listen, it could be a money grab, right,
check out our registry. You know they feel that by

(04:36):
you know, men and women. You know the guys inviting
the guy friends. The women inviting the women friends, you
get double the presents, and you you knock more stuff
off the registry. I don't know. I don't know what
to expect. I'm not you know obviously. Wait, man, is
this a bridal shower? No? No, it's a baby shower. Oh,
baby shower? Oh do guys get invited to baby showers?

Speaker 3 (04:59):
Not you You're gonna do like diaper changing games and
baby bottle drinking games. That's what I understand them to be.

Speaker 1 (05:07):
I understand that that baby showers are basically, you know,
everybody's opening up presents and stuff and you just sit
there and go ooh ah. But they said they're not
gonna be any presents here at this event. This is
going to be a classy, little little luncheon and some
catching up with some friends and maybe some pictures and things.

Speaker 3 (05:26):
And now I have no idea, but I don't know.
I mean, I'm happy to go, I'm honored, but I
can't believe.

Speaker 1 (05:33):
It's been over fifty years that I've never been to
a baby shower. So I just I've heard baby shower
lore of what to expect, but I feel like baby
showers are more for women only. I mean not to
be sexist, but the guys would just come in at
the end and you know, bring all the presents to

(05:55):
the trunk, to the car and load up the car
and pull away.

Speaker 3 (06:00):
That's what I thought.

Speaker 1 (06:00):
The guy's role was be clean up crew at the end.

Speaker 3 (06:04):
All right, let's see what AI says.

Speaker 1 (06:06):
Uh.

Speaker 3 (06:07):
Key activities and traditions. Guests enjoy lunch, brunch, or snacks,
and often share advice or stories about parenthood. Oh you
love that part. Scary to give parenting advice? Yeah, yeah,
Opening gifts a central part of opening gifts, of course,
baby shower games. Common games designed to break the ice
include baby bingo, guess the baby food, Oh right, you
have to eat baby food out of a jar and

(06:28):
guess the flavor. Oh that's right, that's a famous one,
measuring the mom's belly, and trivia. Interactive activities. Modern showers
may include diy onesie decorating, Oh scary, You're gonna love
decorating a onesie, creating keepsakes for the baby, advice cards.
Guests often right down tips for the parents to be scary.

(06:49):
If you got to give parents to be one bit
of advice as becoming new parents, what would you what
would your advice.

Speaker 1 (06:55):
It would be don't have a calligy baby. Yeah. Baby.
Also scary recommends condoms, so you want to have a
second one. There's that. Yeah. I I I don't know
if if I'm the right person to be inviting to
a baby shit anything.

Speaker 3 (07:10):
Oh yeah baby show.

Speaker 1 (07:11):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (07:11):
Modern trends, here we go. Co ed showers. Many showers
now include both men and women.

Speaker 1 (07:16):
Co ed showers. I'm sorry that sounded like a porn yes.
Often resembling a barbecue or a cocktail party. Low pressure activities.
Moving away from embarrassing games, many opt for more casual
socializing or engaging in less traditional activities. Sometimes the baby's
gender is revealed. Light food and beverages are usually served.

(07:37):
Three to five games are often played. The mom to
be opens presents, followed by desserts. Oh it's perfect. So
it was Saturday afternoon, fancy shmancy place, of course, duh.
I mean they were talking Bergen County, So that's big, big,
big money. So I mean, what am I necessarily? What
am I supposed to What am I supposed to buy?

(07:57):
You know? I went to go look on the registry
to see what was left left, and all they had
was a bunch of pacifiers, pampers, and three thousand dollars
pieces of furniture, so there was nothing in between. I
feel like an idiot. I feel like I'm late to
the party on that one. Maybe they should shag go
rogue and buy buy my own gift for them that's
not on the regist tree. Is that acceptable? Well?

Speaker 3 (08:20):
Why don't you buy them? What used to buy everybody?
A plate and a spoon from? What was that place?

Speaker 1 (08:27):
Uh?

Speaker 3 (08:27):
Tiffany, Tiffany?

Speaker 1 (08:29):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (08:29):
Yeah, you want to tell when I got your kids? Yeah,
I got a bloop, a little plate like a glass plate.
You can't give a child and a and a and
a and a and a spoon.

Speaker 2 (08:40):
And.

Speaker 1 (08:42):
Berdy, it was a parringer, a parringer and a spoon
and a plate. What is a parringer? Google it, bitch,
It's a very at a parringer. But anyway, did what
did you do with those gifts? I always wondered, Oh?

Speaker 3 (08:58):
Sold them?

Speaker 1 (09:00):
You sold them.

Speaker 3 (09:01):
When we returned back to Tiffany's and got something else.

Speaker 1 (09:05):
I mean, what does it? What does a baby can do?

Speaker 2 (09:07):
It?

Speaker 3 (09:07):
A glass plate? It's more of a keepsake. I didn't
keep it for any sake I got some cash sake. Okay,
so but did that to everybody until I pointed out
to you you gave every child born on the Alminstrat
Morning Show glassware.

Speaker 1 (09:29):
Okay, do you feel like it was the thought that counts?
You wouldn't want to like I thought a silver spoon,
thought a silver spoon.

Speaker 3 (09:36):
That's beautiful. Okay, all right, no, slic says you all
know what you buy babies. You don't buy them a
silver spoon that they can go. Look, somebody gave me
this when I was a baby. Well I'm gonna doing
it now. Okay. Here are some traditional games you can play. Scary,
so exciting for scary who never want step children? Blindfolded
diaper changing? There you go. What's like that?

Speaker 1 (09:58):
Is that the one where they me with a bunch
of snickers in a diaper?

Speaker 3 (10:03):
Scary?

Speaker 1 (10:03):
It's blindfolded diaper changing. So you get a box of
diapers and a stuffed animal or a baby doll and
you change the diaper.

Speaker 3 (10:11):
Okay, guess the do date. How exciting is that?

Speaker 1 (10:16):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (10:17):
Oh, everyone writes advice for mom loud. I'm so in
baby trade, baby shower game. That is oh for this
mom's to be fill out trade cards as the answer sheets.
Guess will fill out their own trade cards, checking the
trades that they think she wants the baby to inherit
from either herself or dad. So you play guess the trade, like, oh,

(10:37):
I hope they baby gets scaries eyebrows, yes, well eyebrow yeah?

Speaker 1 (10:44):
Okay?

Speaker 3 (10:45):
What else can help? The passive pacifier pong? It's similar
to beer pong, only you'll be swapped. You'll swap ping
pong balls for pacifiers and beer for the mother to
be's favorite beverage, so she'll throw nipples into cups.

Speaker 1 (11:00):
Can't wait for that one. I do want to drink
out of a bottle, though, I did that on the
Big Show and I lost terribly.

Speaker 3 (11:07):
But then again, I was playing by the rules.

Speaker 1 (11:09):
I was.

Speaker 3 (11:09):
I was sucking it like Maggie sucks.

Speaker 1 (11:11):
On the Simpsons.

Speaker 3 (11:13):
Oh this one for you, scary.

Speaker 1 (11:16):
Everyone brings a baby book, right, and then you read
You read a paragraph from the baby book and see
if anyone else can guess what book it's from. How
the hell would anyone know?

Speaker 3 (11:27):
Do people like?

Speaker 1 (11:28):
Are they they brush up on their on their baby books?
Is that a thing? Captain underpants like things like that? Oh?

Speaker 3 (11:36):
How about this one scary. A large pile of baby
socks is on the floor and you have to see
how many pairs you can put together in a time period.
Get the hell out of here.

Speaker 1 (11:48):
I feel like this is like these parties games are
from the nineteen fifties or some.

Speaker 3 (11:52):
Shit old wives tale are guessing game? Okay, scary if
the if the wife, if the expectant mother is crazy sweets,
is she more likely to have a boy or a
girl if she's have no idea? But these are like
you get the circle boy or girl? So baby trade game? Oh,
what's what's in my diaper bag? Oh?

Speaker 1 (12:14):
Where's the one where you melt baby ruths and and snickers?

Speaker 3 (12:18):
Baby shower bingo, I'm looking hold on. Oh bottle to bottle,
of course, sprinkles into a baby bottle?

Speaker 1 (12:26):
Is that like? Oh, I'm trying to understand this, so
to be honest. Oh baby baby food taste test. Oh
you're gonna love baby food taste.

Speaker 3 (12:43):
I mean that I will because I love to eat.
But yeah, but okay, it's gonna be peas. I don't
care eat peas. What do they call those? What are
those mushy peas? With the British people eat that.

Speaker 1 (12:55):
Ship, baby charades. Oh, stroller relay scary, gonna have relay
races with the strollers lost the rubber duck.

Speaker 3 (13:06):
People really enjoy these games.

Speaker 1 (13:08):
Is this a thing?

Speaker 3 (13:09):
Oh, you're gonna play? What does the cake cost?

Speaker 1 (13:12):
One?

Speaker 3 (13:12):
Is that?

Speaker 1 (13:13):
That's awful?

Speaker 3 (13:15):
It's tacky. You're gonna build a diaper cake before the party.
The cake is gonna be all made of diapers, and
then based on how much diapers cost, you have to
guess how much the diaper cake costs. You're changing my.

Speaker 1 (13:28):
Mind going to this baby shower.

Speaker 3 (13:31):
Baby baby bottled Bowling? Scary? I mean i I I'm
so jealous. You're gonna get to play baby bottle bowling
and count the sheep. You just show up for the
free meal.

Speaker 1 (13:44):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (13:44):
Absolutely? Oh the fire race the pacifiers player will hold
a chopstick in their mouth and pick up pacifiers from
a table and run across the room.

Speaker 1 (13:55):
Ah. Where are you getting these ideas from? What are you.

Speaker 3 (13:58):
Reading off of? I'm reading off of Woman dot com
twenty five The Pioneer Woman dot Com twenty five Fun
baby shower games for mom and her guests. Oh, scary
doing the nipple race.

Speaker 1 (14:12):
I can't wait.

Speaker 3 (14:13):
You're making this really attractive for me.

Speaker 1 (14:15):
I'll tell you that.

Speaker 3 (14:18):
You know what's great is you spent your life never
wanting kids, but you still can't avoid a baby shower. Ah,
how does that work? See when I was having kids,
When we were having kids, right, there were no men
didn't go to the baby shower. The men would get
together and like go out, go to home depot kill time.

Speaker 1 (14:36):
Right, jeez, I'm in for it. I can't wait. Oh God,
my boys podcast. It's gonna have a question for you.
Guess right now as we record, this is very high
price near me.

Speaker 3 (14:55):
It's about four fifty five a gallon. It was around
two seventy five. It's gone up a lot. Everyone knows
why it's it's up, doesn't really matter. And by the way,
we have to talk about slice time in the next break. Anyway,
So I've given you shit over the years because when
you get gas, you leave the engine running. Oh And

(15:15):
I would always say, first of all, it's dangerous. We
don't have to debate that again. We already debated.

Speaker 1 (15:20):
I always thought that. I always thought that was a myth.
But okay, okay, and you're wasting gas as you get gas,
so your boogie bastard.

Speaker 3 (15:29):
I need to know.

Speaker 1 (15:30):
At four fifty five four sixty a gallon, are you
still letting the engine run when you get gas? Yes?
Oh my god? What are you doing?

Speaker 3 (15:41):
Why don't you turn the How much does gas have
to be per gallon before you'll turn your engine off?

Speaker 1 (15:46):
The amount of gas you're you're wasting by idling is
like the length of time you would sit at a
red light. It's nominal. That's not true. Yes it is,
It's very true. No, it's not.

Speaker 3 (15:56):
A red light is about two two minutes you get gas?
It takes seven or eight.

Speaker 1 (16:00):
No, it doesn't. What gain stations you go into, broh,
the cheap one takes three minutes.

Speaker 3 (16:06):
To fill up tops you turn your engine off. Le'd
be ridiculous. Why I why I go to Taco bell,
I get in line, I turn my engine off.

Speaker 1 (16:14):
You are something else, bro Why would you waste gas
when you call needs gas? I don't even at these prices.

Speaker 3 (16:22):
I don't get it. Your boogie?

Speaker 1 (16:23):
Fuck? All right? Really?

Speaker 3 (16:27):
Really, you got you gotta come after me on that one.
I mean now I'm gonna come after you. Yeah, yeah,
I don't think.

Speaker 1 (16:33):
I don't think it makes a damn bit of difference
if you shut your you shut your engine off or not.
I don't. I don't think it's a safety thing there.
But if you want to continue to believe that, then
by all means you can go for it.

Speaker 3 (16:45):
You have the uh grammar police jingle.

Speaker 1 (16:48):
I sure do.

Speaker 3 (16:50):
I would like you to bring that up please. Oh wait,
maybe I should bring that home.

Speaker 1 (16:54):
Oh no, wait, I did bring it home. I have
to have that one. Ground police.

Speaker 3 (16:58):
Oh oh yeah, yeah, police, trim a police.

Speaker 1 (17:12):
What's going on, Brodie, It's been a while since we
did the ground police.

Speaker 3 (17:15):
It's been a while statin dammit. Did we use that
one a lot? Okay? So I'm at Pickleball. I got
a bunch of pickleball stories this episode. But somebody was
asking somebody else about getting a new paddle, and they said,
did you already get it already? Did you already get

(17:35):
it already?

Speaker 1 (17:37):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (17:38):
That's from the Department of redundancy department correct, Yeah, yeah, okay,
so it's lexics untied. Yeah. I'm in Target and there
was a couple of employees hanging around, not really working.
They were kind of you know, talking, hanging around, hanging us,
hanging around.

Speaker 1 (17:55):
Count crows, right, Count crows. I was thinking of beal
Juice from how Stern. That's not a song though, all
the memes, Hey what are you doing? No, I don't know.
I'm just hanging around, hanging around.

Speaker 3 (18:09):
So they're all just talking in a group, like four
or five of them, and a supervisor, the manager comes over.

Speaker 1 (18:14):
And says, hey, break up this coffee clutch. Oh that's pitiful.

Speaker 3 (18:21):
Yeah, for those who don't know why that's wrong, it's
coffee clatch. Clatch, it's not a coffee clutch. I didn't
want to correct the woman because she was, you know,
yelling at the employees. I break up that coffee clatch.
It's not a clatch. It's clutch. No, right, it's a clatch,
coffee clatch. And if you don't know what a clatch is,
google it and see what language it came from originally.

(18:43):
But it's coffee clatch. And then lastly, a friend of
mine who always sends me stuff sent me, Uh, he's single,
and so he's on he's on the dating sites. So
he saw this and thought, as a grammar person, I
would find this hilarious. This woman, now, is this a
deal breaker for you?

Speaker 1 (19:03):
Scary?

Speaker 3 (19:04):
Because it would be for me she wrote, looking for
someone to hold my hand on a skating ring. Oh
my god, that's awful.

Speaker 1 (19:15):
Although I can see where the confusion comes in because
a rink, it's a rink, but people think it's a
ring because it's round and rings are round and round,
So I can see where.

Speaker 3 (19:28):
I bet you a lot of people get that one wrong. Okay, skating, okay,
but but okay, now slices and by the way, slices
if you don't know what that means, slices is what
we refer to our audience, our listeners. So if you're
new here, you're now slice slices. Would that be a
deal breaker for you? Just like when Chandler didn't want

(19:48):
to he broke up with a girl because she said supposedly.

Speaker 1 (19:53):
Right, Yeah, that's terrible.

Speaker 3 (19:55):
So is that a deal breaker? If somebody said, oh,
I'm going to go down to the skating ring, is
that a deal breaker? Or if you say that, did
we just teach you something you didn't know? So, uh,
I'm saying it's fine. It'd probably be a deal breaker
for me, though, I have to be honest. So uh,
that's that's my My short segment on Grammar Police was

(20:17):
those those couple of things. So so I did a
bougie thing this weekend.

Speaker 1 (20:22):
No, what are the odds? But it wasn't my listen.
I was invited. I was an invited guest to go
down to the F one uh event, the events surrounding
F one, not F one itself. But we went to
Carbone Beach. Carbone is like, you know Carbone in the restaurant.

Speaker 3 (20:41):
Is it a year since we made fun of you
for Carbone?

Speaker 1 (20:43):
If you remember last year at this time, I went
down the Carbone Beach and I ran into Say Kwon
Barkley and that we were both hed. He had the
merse mer right this year, who did I run into?
I ran into Alex Earl. You know who she is. Oh, yeah,
she's the one feuding with Alex Cooper. Alex Cooper from

(21:07):
Call Her Daddy.

Speaker 3 (21:07):
Yeah, yeah, they they They made fun of them on
snel this past week.

Speaker 1 (21:11):
Oh. She had a nice black leather skirt on and
it was it was.

Speaker 3 (21:14):
It was cool. John Summit, the DM artist performed.

Speaker 1 (21:17):
It was it was good. That is he at the
top of his game. Yeah, because he's at the Summit exactly.
I see what he did there. David Brody, No, it
was it was good. It was, it was It was
a good time, but it was raining since the minute
that I landed it was pouring like a monsoon, and
it was a monsoon the next day. I feel like
that was the big equalizer. It's like, scary, you know,

(21:38):
this is what you get. You're getting punished for leaving
town and going to Miami. I can't wink Smith. Okay,
So so yeah, the fourth time I've been to Miami
now in the past few months, and the fourth time
it's been just pouring rain and ugly, terrible. No South

(22:00):
Florida like weather.

Speaker 3 (22:01):
Well slices. Here's what you don't know is he texted me, hey,
And I keep in mind I saw him posting all
these pictures at these bougie events and he said, he
text me, he goes, I'm coming home. I don't know
if I could do slice time on Monday, I said,
the worst weekend it rained the whole time I was
in Southeast really did it was?

Speaker 1 (22:18):
It was kind of a bummer. I didn't get to
take advantage of the pool at the hotel.

Speaker 3 (22:21):
That was at you pour, bastard, you couldn't take advantage
of the pool. Meanwhile, you're at hobnobbin with all the
rich people hanging out in your fancy What was it?

Speaker 1 (22:29):
What was that? What was that?

Speaker 3 (22:31):
That blue shirt you wore? The question you asked if
it was it's Miami chic. Oh, Miami Chic.

Speaker 1 (22:37):
I mean, yeah, it's a far cry from Brooklyn Industrial,
That's right.

Speaker 3 (22:41):
What did I say? You matched the tiles in the shower?

Speaker 1 (22:44):
Did you? Did you see what I wrote? Yeah? Somebody
else wrote something even more rude. They said that I
looked like a fucking class azoul to kill a bottle,
Because I.

Speaker 3 (22:59):
Mean, listen a little bit you did.

Speaker 1 (23:01):
It's a bougie item to begin with, but everyone kind
of hopefully knows that that iconic look. It looks like
a chest piece, but it's blue and white, it's got
all kind of prints all over it. And I I
was wearing a shirt that might have actually looked like
the classe is old bottle, and I'm was okay with it.

Speaker 3 (23:17):
Either that or a shower curtain, one or the other.
It was definitely Kurtney.

Speaker 1 (23:20):
Something like that.

Speaker 3 (23:22):
Now, did you get a lot of feedback, any positive
feedback on the shirt? Anybody says, hey, no, that shirt?

Speaker 1 (23:29):
Well, I was first trying to understand if I was
indeed wearing Miami chic and I couldn't figure it out.
I think you need to be Miami chic to wear
Miami chic. Well, I was wearing white white jeans, the
one expensive pair of sneakers I own.

Speaker 3 (23:48):
Which are these Gucci subitons Gucci right right right, the Gucci.

Speaker 1 (23:51):
Right is white Guccie sneakers that I've born to like everything.

Speaker 3 (23:55):
And this is why you leave your car running when
you get gassed.

Speaker 1 (23:57):
White jeans and this, uh, I guess this classe Azul
printed shirt. So I'm like, I think I'm doing Miami chic, right,
is this Miami chic? But then like it looked it
looked like a smurf exploded on you. You're terrible. Can't
you give me one compliment? I thought the shirt didn't

(24:19):
look tight, thank you? It was pretty loose on me. Yeah, yeah,
I mean I noticed that. That's thank you to my
friends at Orderly Med's. I've been, you know, losing all
the weight so in an orderly fashion, in orderly fashion. Yeah, no, no,
it's been, it's been great. But anyway, Yeah, so, so
I came back from Miami devoid of sleep, and uh

(24:41):
it's been it's been a roller coaster every ever since,
there's been so.

Speaker 3 (24:45):
Much scary sys to me. Scary sys to me Monday night,
here's what you're gonna do? Because I said I had
I was gonna be out to dinner and I would
be back around eight thirty on Monday. And he says, oh, great,
eight thirty. When you get back, we'll do slice time.
It'll be fantastic. We'll bang it out as soon as
you get home. It's terrific. Great eight thirty. I get home.

(25:07):
I rush home, eight thirty. I text him, no response.
I call them, no response. Scary was outhold? Before eight
thirty on Monday night, I.

Speaker 1 (25:15):
Was dead asleep? What would you ask? Would you expect?
I got three hours of sleep the night before. We
did the show in the morning. Then I was on
a flight all day.

Speaker 3 (25:26):
Did you not get any sleep because it was raining?
Because you're out being bougie, I was out and being
Miami Sho. I was just being Miami Sheic. Did you
turn the other shek?

Speaker 1 (25:35):
How would you describe I still want to know what
Miami Sheik looks like?

Speaker 3 (25:40):
Is it put together an outfit?

Speaker 1 (25:42):
Because some of the people there were dressed in suits,
and I'm like, well, that's not fucking Miami chic again.

Speaker 3 (25:48):
The people are the ones that are Miami chic. Let's
see if I can go hold on google it, what
is Miami ic?

Speaker 1 (25:54):
See what?

Speaker 3 (25:55):
Let's see what I get? Miami Shek is a fashion
and lifestyle aesthetic blending tropical glamour, casual elegance, and urban
sophistication that you're out reflecting Miami's vibrant, warm weather culture.
It combines lightweight, breathable fabrics. I was gonna say linen.
Were you wearing linen?

Speaker 1 (26:15):
It wasn't linen, but it was close, okay. Bold colors
that you couldn't get any.

Speaker 3 (26:21):
Boulder prince stylish, designer driven pieces suitable for both beach
side brunches and high end nightlife. Fabric and fit. Breathable,
breezy and lightweight materials are essential. Colors and prints, vibrant colors,
tropical prints, and sunny bright tones, but not exclusively dark
colors so you don't have to wear a sport jacket.
So I win. I won the night hold on Statement sunglasses.

(26:44):
Did you have Statement sunglasses?

Speaker 1 (26:47):
It was a nighttime event. I felt like a douchebet
bringing my sunglasses, but that's Miami sheek. Did you wear
a k hat? No?

Speaker 3 (26:53):
Are you wearing bold elegant jewelry to complete them like
a fedora? Common popular choices include tailored white jeans, were
yours tailored? No styler, swimsuits, pad with beach skirts, or flowing,
lightweight dresses. Hold on vibe. It's described as casual yet elegant, fresh,
and unapologetically confident. By the way, I want to vomit.

(27:15):
I don't ever want to be described as any of
these things.

Speaker 1 (27:18):
That's where you and I. That's where you and I
like kind of preat you know, part ways.

Speaker 3 (27:23):
I am Miami tourist cargo pants and a graphic T shirt.

Speaker 1 (27:27):
There is Brooklyn. You are Brody Bahama. You're Tommy Bahama. Listen,
I have some Tommy Bahama. I'm comfortable with it.

Speaker 3 (27:35):
I don't wear them as dress shirts, but I'm casual
in a Tommy Bahamas shirt.

Speaker 1 (27:38):
I'm not.

Speaker 3 (27:38):
I'm not ashamed to admit it.

Speaker 1 (27:40):
Uh.

Speaker 3 (27:41):
Are you more Catus Jack? No, I'm not Cattus Jack. No. No,
I would say I am definitely not Miami chic.

Speaker 1 (27:52):
I'm not Brooklyn industry. How would you describe your style? Uh?

Speaker 3 (27:57):
Plaid shirt not tucked in over jeans, on pair of sneakers,
a layered piece under the dress shirt, you know, like
a different color maybe or coordinating color casual I do untucked.
I'm on Tucket, so you're you're a Brooklyn schlub. Uh yeah, yeah,
I'm Who does that guy think he is dressing like

(28:18):
that in here? Get him out of here? That's but
I'm comfortable.

Speaker 1 (28:22):
That's me.

Speaker 3 (28:23):
I don't have to. I don't worry about other people. Say, listen,
scary I have We've talked about this, right, the shoes
that Elvis sport us. Yep, we talked about that. I
still don't feel comfortable wearing them. They're too expensive, they're
too nice.

Speaker 1 (28:34):
Have you ever thought about selling them? No? I wouldn't.

Speaker 3 (28:37):
No, I would never sell anything else that Elvis bought
me as a gift.

Speaker 1 (28:40):
No.

Speaker 3 (28:41):
I mean it's been a lot, it's been a lot
of years. It has what was it two thousand and fourteen,
fifteen something like that. I've worn them, they're still they're
still in style. I've worn them on cruises because I
can't get them scuffed off. There's no sidewalk. I'm not
gonna step in dog poop. So I wear am on cruises,
but I have not worn them in this street. Brodie's
cruise shoes.

Speaker 1 (29:02):
My cruise shoes, and I still look they're blue, they're blues,
and they still look news relatively news, so scary.

Speaker 3 (29:13):
All right, I'm gonna give you a choice here we're
talking about we're talking about baby showers. Yeah right, I
need everyone's opinion on this. So I went to a
restaurant that's relatively new scary. You've been there, The Ugly Dumpling.

Speaker 1 (29:31):
I did the grand opening of the Ugly Dumpling, the
one in min thank you jay Z. I did the
one in the Touching, and there was another one in
another city. That's where I did them. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (29:43):
So I went for dinner and it's not expensive. It's
a lot of dim sum, you know, appetizer style Chinese food,
but fresh but fresh. Yeah really, oh my god, it
was so good. Anyway, the waiting area very busy. It's
still new, so it's always is always aligned. We went
on a Wednesday night, busy.

Speaker 1 (30:03):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (30:05):
We get there and there's a couple of benches like
with no backsit them. They're like ottomans like that. Two
people can sit on everyone else is standing waiting for
that table to be buzzed on their on their phones
on one of the benches over by the host stand.
And I'm standing and I'm tired. I want to sit
right John, thank you, I'm still standing. So there's a

(30:30):
pregnant woman and her husband sitting on one of these
benches for two So I'm like, oh, well, at least
the pregnant woman is sitting.

Speaker 1 (30:37):
Fine.

Speaker 3 (30:38):
Well, another couple comes in and as their friends, and
the pregnant woman and the guy stand up to say
hi to them. All right, So I'm watching them, and
now they're standing, I don't know, two or three feet
away from the bench they were sitting on. Okay, So
I wait five minutes, six minutes, and I say to

(31:00):
my buddy, I'm gonna go sit down. They're clearly not
sitting any longer. Go sit on the bench. My feet hurt.
I'm getting tired. I have a right to sit on
the bench. They're not sitting on it. So I got
my friend's like, dude, that's her bench. I'm like, no,
it's not. So I go and sit down on the
bench and the husband sees me after like a minute,
sees me sitting he goes, hey, hey, I was sitting
there and I look, and he goes, and my wife's pregnant.

(31:24):
So I said, I see that your wife's pregnant. But
you've both been standing for like seven or eight minutes.
I assumed you aren't going to be sitting back down.
So he goes, well, we might. I said, okay, if
your wife sit down, she's more than welcome to sit
next to me. But you, sir, are not pregnant.

Speaker 1 (31:44):
Oh so he thought, he thought, because she was pregnant,
he gets the feet past and he gets to sit
with her.

Speaker 3 (31:49):
Yeah, now, my wife's pregnant, so it's our bench.

Speaker 1 (31:52):
No, no, no, no, no, no, it's her she gets
to sit.

Speaker 3 (31:56):
Okay, but how many minutes after she stands up, she
is no longer her bench.

Speaker 1 (32:01):
Now, my friend didn't sit down. Used to make a
football move. If she makes a football move, it's not
her bench. Right, she moved, she hugged, she kissed. Yeah,
and not her bench anymore, Not her bench, not her
bench now. If she got up to stretch, I'd say,
still her bench.

Speaker 3 (32:17):
Still her bench. Now. If she says to me, hey, sir,
do you mind if I sit back down? Oh, I
get up in a heartbeat.

Speaker 1 (32:23):
Not a problem.

Speaker 3 (32:24):
But she didn't ask me to move.

Speaker 1 (32:25):
The husband just assumed they could stand two feet away
from the bench and still claim the bench. So how
many minutes is it okay once she's standing for me
to go over and sit down on the bench. M god,
sixty seconds? Oh not even okay. I waited five or
six minutes. I waited. I'm like, I don't want here
once once you yet five six minutes in she got

(32:49):
sitting down there. That's a free bench. That's anyone. That's
a community bench, it's anyone's bench.

Speaker 3 (32:55):
She didn't put her bag on the bench.

Speaker 1 (32:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (32:57):
For her husband to say, the husband's like, I was
sitting there. My wife's pregnant. Yeah, your wife's pregnant. Your
work here is done. You dropped what you needed to drop.
She's pregnant. Now she's carrying the baby. You don't get
to sit now. If they had a baby and he
had he was carrying the baby, he was holding the
car carrier. Absolutely, the car seat, different story, yes, no,

(33:19):
but no, the baby is in the womb. He's he's irrelevant,
that's correct. And I say this as the father of three. Uh,
he's not irrelevant. Irrelevant. But in terms of property of
the bench, you don't get to sit dirty. Yeah, you
don't know on the bench. So what did you say?
I said to him? I go, I see the YOUU
wife's pregnant, sir, and if she'd like to sit down,

(33:41):
I said, but you are not pregnant, so therefore you
don't need to see you stood up to this guy.

Speaker 1 (33:46):
No, I stayed sitting. I was very polite about it.
You know, you know what I meant the Brook Glynn
Boys podcast. We will be right baby, all right, thanks
for sticking around to the commercials. Remember they pay our bills.
Let's not make fun of our sponsors.

Speaker 3 (34:08):
Who would we love our sponsors?

Speaker 1 (34:09):
Well, not us, you know, well, let's that's not come
down on the sponsors. Sometimes people do anyway. All right.

Speaker 3 (34:15):
Anyway, that being said, I wanted to I asked AI
a very important question and I got an answer.

Speaker 1 (34:23):
I was very happy.

Speaker 3 (34:25):
So you know, you can have AI analyze things, which
I did, and I asked it a specific question and
I'd like to share the response I got. So let
me pull it up here. Hold on, I have to pause. Okay,
so you're not going to hear me, because when you're
talking to it. It doesn't record when your screen recorded

(34:45):
records the chat GPT speaking, but not me. So I
asked chat GPT to look at my you know, I
put my camera on, you know, selfie mode, and I said,
look at me as I'm dressed up. I was going
out to dinner. I said, how would you describe how
old you think I am based on how I look.
I'm dressed up for dinner. What do you think? So

(35:07):
here we go, No problem at all.

Speaker 2 (35:09):
Go ahead and adjust the camera or angle yourself however
you like, and once you're settled, I'll take another look
and give you a fresh guess.

Speaker 3 (35:15):
No rush, just take your time. By the way, I
love how you I'm.

Speaker 2 (35:20):
Taking a look now again, just a rough ballpark. I'd
guess you're in your late thirties, maybe early forties. No
problem at all, Ahead.

Speaker 1 (35:27):
All right, thank you chat ept.

Speaker 3 (35:28):
All right, she's flattering you. She doesn't want you to
delete delete her.

Speaker 1 (35:33):
That's it. No, there you go.

Speaker 3 (35:35):
That's that's modern technology right there, analyzing and scanning.

Speaker 1 (35:40):
They're always gonna they're always gonna flatter you and humor you.
They're always gonna patronize you. Do you right now? All right?
And By the way, it's interesting that you have the
female voice talking to you. I've got the male voice.
Don't you have enough like women in your life around you? Yeah?

Speaker 3 (35:55):
But this but this one agrees with me.

Speaker 1 (35:57):
Oh okay, all right, so let's see what we got here.

Speaker 3 (36:01):
By the way, I changed back and forth. Sometimes I
have a male voice.

Speaker 1 (36:04):
Okay, I's I never changed, never fucked with the voice
of my chat ChiPT Let's let's see what we got here,
all right? Uh? And what do I do here? So?
So what do I say? Hey?

Speaker 3 (36:17):
So you hit you hit the speaker button.

Speaker 1 (36:20):
And say, all right, so, hey chat, I'm just hanging
out here and don't have a because I do I
I talked to my chat hey, so so chat listen.
So about to go out? You know, I'm looking at
myself in the mirror, and I'm wondering how old can
I pass for it tonight? How old do I look?
I just got out of the shower looking good. I

(36:43):
just shaved. So if I turn my camera on, could
you tell me how old I may look?

Speaker 4 (36:50):
I can definitely give you a friendly guess just for fun.
But remember it's all about your confidence. If you turn
on your camera, I'll give you an honest impression.

Speaker 1 (36:58):
Let's see all right? Now, once again, I don't I
don't care about friendly. I want you to give me
a game. Yeah, blunt truth. Is that cool? Remember I'm
a no nonsense guy.

Speaker 4 (37:07):
Got it, no sugarcoating. If you show me, I'll give
you a straight up impression. Whenever you're ready, I'm here.

Speaker 1 (37:14):
Okay, y So now what do I do? Now? How
do I do this? Here? BROI just turn the just
plus turn the.

Speaker 3 (37:20):
Camera the camera, put on selfie mode.

Speaker 1 (37:23):
Camera? Oh yeah, yeah, okay, all right, yep, all right,
it's on. Hey, what's up close?

Speaker 3 (37:29):
Into the mic?

Speaker 1 (37:29):
See you? You see right? I do?

Speaker 4 (37:33):
Honestly, you're looking sharp. I'd say you could easily pass
from mid thirties tonight. Confidence is half the game, though,
so rocket mid thirties?

Speaker 1 (37:41):
Huh? What makes you say mid thirties?

Speaker 4 (37:44):
Your skin looks smooth, you got a fresh shave, and
you're giving off a relaxed, confident vibe. That combo tends
to read a little younger. Plus you've got a good
energy going.

Speaker 1 (37:54):
Ha you like my energy?

Speaker 4 (37:56):
Then, I'm just saying what I see. You've got a lively,
confident presence and that does a lot so go out
there and own it.

Speaker 1 (38:05):
Age is just a number anyway. Yeah. Well, because David Brody,
my friend here, she said that he was touching forty.

Speaker 4 (38:15):
Well you can tell Brody that tonight. Hey, you're gonna
outshine him no matter what number's on the paper. Just
have fun and let the energy to the talking.

Speaker 1 (38:24):
Oh so broke, So I should stick it to Brody then,
and let him know I look like the younger man tonight.

Speaker 3 (38:31):
Yeah, by fort exactly.

Speaker 4 (38:32):
Just give him a little playful jab tell him you've
got the fountain of youth on your side tonight.

Speaker 1 (38:37):
All in good fun, right, Yeah, except the only thing
is he is ten years older than me.

Speaker 3 (38:42):
That is not true.

Speaker 4 (38:43):
Well, that just gives you more annover. The banter age
might be a fact, but tonight you're bringing the youthful charm.
Just enjoy it out.

Speaker 1 (38:51):
There, Hi, thank you bye all. It's scary.

Speaker 3 (38:53):
So therefore, if I'm in my early forties or forty, right,
and your mid thirties, then if mine's accurate, yours is accurate.
If mine's not accurate, yours is in accurate. Okay, So
what are you getting at? I'm getting that that's how
good we look.

Speaker 1 (39:10):
Thank you all.

Speaker 3 (39:11):
Right, I'm happy with it. Wow, thirties.

Speaker 1 (39:14):
See, and once again I think that they take the
age and they just drop it down by ten years
just because.

Speaker 3 (39:20):
But they don't know how sowet a minute. So then
it thinks you're forty five. You'd still be happy with that. Yeah, yes,
so I'm fifty three too. All right, okay, all right,
moving on, Thank you Chad Gpt for that analysis.

Speaker 1 (39:33):
My buddy went to a wedding last night and he
he couldn't believe it.

Speaker 3 (39:40):
We got married. No, well he was. It was a
second wedding and it was a little.

Speaker 1 (39:46):
Bit more wedding, second wedding he had been to. It
was it was a second his buddy got remarried. Oh,
and it was still dinner, you know. They still had
like a nice little three four course dinner. They had
a little cocktail hour or dervs and stuff like that.
And then so apparently when it came time to get

(40:07):
some drinks, he's sitting at the table and the cocktail
waitress comes over and says, hey, uh, she says, so
what would you like to drink? Would you would you
like your cocktail? He's like, yeah, what do you have?
And she goes, oh, we gotta we have everything. Okay, awesome.
I'm gonna take an apparol sprits. Okay cool. So do

(40:28):
you have a credit card that we can take to hold,
you know, for a hold, you know, we take your
credit card and he's like, uh, he has to open
a tab and she says yeah, see, he goes, okay,
here's my credit card. Awkward, awkward. Yeah. So he went

(40:50):
to a wedding at a pretty decent restaurant slash catering
place where they were serving you know, dinner and had
our dirves and stuff. But when it came to the drinks,
it was a cash bar, cash bar, and the waitress
actively went around to people to put them in a

(41:11):
bad spot to take their credit cards to get drinks.
Is this a thing? I don't know.

Speaker 3 (41:21):
I feel sometimes I.

Speaker 1 (41:23):
Don't want to see I don't want to see you
most too quickly because I feel like there's slices out
there that are going to jump on me be like, hey,
what are you talking about. I had a wedding and
it was a cash bar and it was fine and
it was beautiful, and so I don't want to like
rip anyone here. But I just assume and maybe it's
just because of the parties I've been to. I can
only give you my perspective on my past that when

(41:43):
you go to a party like that, it's an open bar.
I mean, they'll be you know, it may not be
a top shelf open bar, but it's at least an
open bar. At least it can be like, you know,
here's here's you choose from this category, or we have wine, beer,
and wine and soda and then everything else you pay for.
I've been to those types of weddings. But yeah, yeah,

(42:06):
you can't spend all the count other people's money. I know.

Speaker 3 (42:10):
Look, I went to a wedding ones that would soda
and beer only right, anything else was you had to
you had to pay for. And I thought that was fine.
You want to drink, Like, if you're gonna track me
for soda, I think that's a problem. Soda is like
two cents to make a glass of soda. So if

(42:30):
given soda and and and you know, and beer on
tap or or house wine, I think that's fine. I
don't think you owe it to the people that have
stolely and and tinos and and expenses. Once again, this
is where we differ. David brody. All right, so you'd say,
if you can't afford to buy me everybody at the

(42:51):
party hot top shelf liquor, you should not top shelf.

Speaker 1 (42:53):
See there you're putting. That's where you put words in
my mouth. And I'm gonna clarify right now. Let me
bring let me say what about what about any liquor?
If you can't afford liquor, you shouldn't get married, is
what you're saying. No, I think that if you're gonna
throw a party at a restaurant, wedding hall, whatever the case,
and you're gonna invite all the guests and you can
have a nice little dinner or cocktail hour and stuff,

(43:14):
and it's a reception, you should do.

Speaker 3 (43:16):
Okay, I want you to respond to what I ask.

Speaker 1 (43:17):
What I'm saying is if you're going to do all that,
If you're going to do all that, then you gotta
go all the way.

Speaker 3 (43:24):
You can't give me just a tip. You can't just go.
You gotta go all in. You gotta you've got If
if a couple can't afford to go all in, you're saying,
then don't get married, Well, don't have a wedding.

Speaker 1 (43:35):
I think if it's a daytime affair. Maybe let's call
it a uh like like I'm going to the baby shower,
right or if I'm going to uh a christiening or something,
or a daytime wedding or something like that, whatever.

Speaker 3 (43:48):
And I would say, at the very least.

Speaker 1 (43:52):
You can get away with would be you could have
beer and wine and soda included, and and then and
then cocktails premium, you know what, at least offer at
least offer like bottom shelf. At least say you could

(44:14):
have a cocktail with a spirit and vodka soda is
just vodka soda and it's the vodka of their choice,
and it's included.

Speaker 3 (44:24):
And if you want something a little bit more premium, like.

Speaker 1 (44:26):
A kettle or a Gray Goose or Belvedere, then you
pay that. I think that's acceptable because you don't want
people to take advantage of the open bar, but because
you want to kick you.

Speaker 3 (44:38):
Let's say I have two hundred people at the wedding yep, okay,
And of the two hundred people, let's say only one
hundred people order drinks, but they order two each. So
now we're back to two hundred drinks and a little
bit of vodka and soda. Let's say it's four dollars.
Would that be the cost for the bartender? Four dollars drink?

Speaker 1 (45:00):
Whatever?

Speaker 3 (45:01):
Yeah, a three dollars drink for now, you're talking about
eight hundred dollars minimum minimum to throw. Now, now you're
talking close to one thousand dollars approximately, depending on how
many drinks, if people have more than two drinks.

Speaker 1 (45:13):
Whatever.

Speaker 3 (45:14):
One thousand dollars is a lot of money when you
might be spent twenty thirty, forty thousand. I don't know
how much people spend weddings anymore, and I don't want
to count. I don't want to anybody's slices. I don't
want to say what I think you should spend on
your wedding, because if you're happy, the people will come
there happy whatever you spend. Again, I'm a man with people. However,
one thousand dollars more might be a lot of money.

(45:35):
Maybe it is a lot of money, but maybe you're.

Speaker 1 (45:37):
Having a part of you. You're going you're going this far. Oh,
you're having a wedding and you want your hate to
be around you. It's just TACKI a tacky. Tacky is
what you're doing. No, taky is what you're doing. Listen again.
I'm not saying you got to include premium, top shelf
open bar because people are gonna go for the McCall
and eighteen if they know that they can do that,
because then you got to put a cap on it.

(45:58):
But you gotta offer spe it's I mean beer, beer, wine,
soda is basic. But that's a christening, that's maybe a
that's maybe a daytime.

Speaker 3 (46:08):
Why can't you go to a three hour wedding and
not drink alcohol. I think you need to offer it
to people. I think it needs to be there.

Speaker 1 (46:15):
And if you're paying per drink and not two hundred
people are gonna order a spirit.

Speaker 3 (46:20):
I'm just saying, let me ask you a question. If
you went to a wedding that didn't offer top shelf
liquor and you hadn't filled the check out yet, would
you adjust your check No?

Speaker 1 (46:30):
But are they offering me liquor? Are they offering me
a spirit? I mean, can I get vodka? Gin? When
I say spirit, I mean vodka gin, tequila, the things
that you make and you mix with other things to
make a cocktail other.

Speaker 3 (46:43):
Than beer and wine. Yes, you need you need that.
That's part of a bar okay, just just to refresh
my memory with the bother. The wedding your friend went to,
was there no free liquor or, just no top shelf liquor?

Speaker 1 (46:57):
No, nothing was included, No beer, no wine, only soda.

Speaker 3 (47:03):
Okay, so again I'm askined.

Speaker 1 (47:04):
In fact, she asked for his credit card to run
to open a tab, which is a step worse.

Speaker 3 (47:11):
So just to reiterate, if you went to that wedding
like that with no liquor, would you cut back if
you had to spend forty fifty bucks on liquor? Now,
would you cut back on the gift?

Speaker 1 (47:22):
I would? You would? Yeah, I would take it out
of their ass. Fuck that, you're just coming out of
your present. That's tacky. You know, you don't put people,
you don't gather people together. And you know, keep in
mind when you go to decide to go to a wedding,
you know you're you're committing your night to that, You're
committing time and travel and getting dressed up.

Speaker 3 (47:42):
You're you're actually choosing to spend time.

Speaker 1 (47:46):
With someone because you care about them and you want
to celebrate with them. The least they can do in
return is buy you a fucking drink. Because especially since
you're bringing especially since you're bringing a gift as well.
I mean, there's it's so lopsided to begin with the
amount of liquor that I'm going to consume. What to

(48:07):
drinks tis to remax, No, not times everyone, because not everybody.

Speaker 3 (48:12):
Drinks times half times half to people that maybe, and
by the way.

Speaker 1 (48:17):
Some asshole is gonna drink six seven things, but then
there's gonna be five people that don't drink any liquor whatsoever.

Speaker 3 (48:23):
And don't crush you a many.

Speaker 1 (48:24):
Let me tell you.

Speaker 3 (48:25):
Let me tell you about my family, because I don't
come from a family of drinkers. Okay, my family, see
the way you're upset.

Speaker 1 (48:32):
For this guy.

Speaker 3 (48:33):
Yes, Like if you had been at that wedding my
family but no beer or wine, hold on, hold on,
My family would be outraged if they went to a
wedding or bar mitzvah that didn't have pigs in a blanket.

Speaker 1 (48:45):
Outraged. They would take money out of the gift. If
we went to a bar mitz I'm telling you, if
we went and there was no pigs in a blanket
going around, you're out. No shrimp, no shrimp cocktail. But
that's that's a selection choice. That's not that well, that's
not that's not a PREAMI saying that's my that's my anger.

Speaker 3 (49:04):
If I go to a wedding and there's no ketchup
and pigs in a blanket, I can't enjoy myself. Can
I need shrimp?

Speaker 1 (49:10):
I eat shrimp.

Speaker 3 (49:12):
Shrimp, yeah, okay, and blanket.

Speaker 1 (49:14):
Makes you okay, so so that's your thing, that's where
but okay, so so so. Shrimp is usually a premium
on a lot of menus. Right.

Speaker 3 (49:23):
If I went to a wedding and they said I said,
pigs in a blanket, said we're gonna need your credit
card for pigs in a blanket, I would I would
storm out.

Speaker 1 (49:30):
I would storm out, storm the best deal.

Speaker 3 (49:34):
I'm out terry.

Speaker 1 (49:36):
Yeah, well for me, I'm just saying that's petty and
that's awful. If you're throwing a party and you're going
all that way, you gotta listen. A daytime affair that's
lesser than a wedding. Okay, maybe beer, wine and soda
and then everyone can buy their own drinks whatever, But

(49:58):
like a nighttime thing, you gotta you gotta at least
offer bottom shelf. Here's how much I win and if
and if and let me give you some advice. There's
different ways to go about it. Right as the people
who throw the party, you can either tell them ahead
of time, all right, we're just gonna run a tab
and go drink for drink, which I love because I'll

(50:18):
take that risk any any day that that that bar
tab will be lower than what I would pay per
person for the open bar drink package. Because that's the
other thing is they'll they'll think, all right, then you
go to there's two tiers. There's an open bar drink
package and the premium open bar Drink package where you
pay a set price per person and then and then
it's open all night whatever, and they don't run anything.

(50:41):
But I don't. I don't know. I'll hedge my bet
see for that. I'd be like, you know what, fuck it,
I'm just gonna I want you to. I want them
to just ring it up as they go drink for
drink because I know for a fact people don't take
full of overall all your guests. They're not gonna take
full advantage of what I would have paid if I
would have ordered the premium drink package or the lowercase
drink package. Whatever you want to call it all.

Speaker 3 (51:03):
Right, So I'm gonna tell you a quick story about
a wedding I went to a long time ago, And
you tell me if the thing I tell you at
the end makes it worse or it doesn't change anything.

Speaker 1 (51:10):
Ready?

Speaker 3 (51:11):
Yeah, So I went to a wedding long time ago
before I got into radio with somebody I used to
work with. And the wedding was soda and beer bottles.
And that's it. No top shove liquor. Soda and beer bottles. Okay.

(51:33):
Would you say, on a scale of one to ten,
how bad for you? Would that be?

Speaker 1 (51:37):
Like that?

Speaker 3 (51:37):
That's pretty bad, very bad? Medium bad, It's medium?

Speaker 1 (51:44):
Okay?

Speaker 3 (51:45):
Ready? Now it was it was. It was a black
tie only wedding. Does that make it worse? That makes
it unacceptable?

Speaker 1 (51:57):
Okay?

Speaker 3 (51:57):
See that's where I see.

Speaker 1 (52:01):
It wasn't a fancy place. That was the thing.

Speaker 2 (52:03):
It was.

Speaker 1 (52:03):
It was black ties. No, fuck you, scary black ties.

Speaker 3 (52:07):
I told you this. I was the only one wearing
black tie other than the wedding party. But it was
a black tie. It was a black tie affair, right.

Speaker 1 (52:13):
It was black tie optional. But that means that means
they want you in a suit. No, are you making
fancy and fucking be old bougie, then guess what you're
asked better have a fucking drink weed for me at
the bar. You know.

Speaker 3 (52:26):
See that's the bullshit right there. See I wasn't bothered
by it.

Speaker 1 (52:29):
Let me let me give you an example of me
not being bothered by when it's not included again, afternoon
dressed down. It's cash whatever, it's a christening, it's a
it's a it's a sweet sixteen, it's a whatever, beer, wine,
and soda.

Speaker 3 (52:49):
Or what if the what if the bride is is
eight months pregnant and they have to save up their
money for the kid being born. Okay, no, no, still
not still fuck that kid.

Speaker 1 (53:05):
In the case of the black tie optional wedding, you
best be having a full bar for me. I'm sorry, yea.

Speaker 3 (53:10):
Yeah, it was not not the one I went to.

Speaker 1 (53:12):
And finally, I'm I mean, well, the only way it's
acceptable is the bride of the groom are recovering alcoholics.

Speaker 3 (53:20):
Well, but I said she's pregnant so she can't dry.

Speaker 1 (53:23):
No, no, it's a dry wedding and there's no liquor.

Speaker 3 (53:26):
Well that's of course, that's you can't get upset about that.

Speaker 1 (53:29):
I mean that that that that's the exception. All right,
all right, we got to take a break. All right,
my god, did we give you some something to nibble on?
I know, I know that the slices are already preparing
their talkbacks. I could feel it coming in the air tonight,
g boodcast we will be right back, all right. So

(53:50):
I wanted to tell you about lunch I had with
paper menu because it ended. It ended.

Speaker 3 (53:59):
It's the ending I need to tell tell you about.
So we had lunch, very nice lunch, casual dining place,
theme restaurant type place, very casual. And before we leave,
I say to him, I'm going to go to the bathroom.
I gotta go to the bathroom before we leave. He's
all right, I'll be here. Go ahead, go to the bathroom.

Speaker 1 (54:21):
Did you have to drop a fudge dragon?

Speaker 3 (54:24):
I needed to spend some time in the bathroom. I
felt like I was urgent. I need to get to
the bathroom. So I go in the bathroom. I open
the door, and the bathroom I've been in the bathroom before.
There's two sinks, a urinal, and a handicapped stall. There's
only one stall, so that it's because the handicap stall.
There's a woman standing in there, standing in the bathroom.

(54:46):
So I go whoa, whoa, And I go back out
and I look at the door again. I'm like, no,
I read the door right. So I go back in
and there's a woman not probably in her sixties maybe,
So I go in. I go hello, and she says,
I'm sorry. Uh, my husband's in the stall and he

(55:07):
needs me to help push him out. He was handicapped, okay, okay,
so so I I was no problem. So I waited
for him to come out, but it took a while
for him to finish and her to wheel him out,
which is only part of the story to explain why
it took so long that then I had to go
to the bathroom. So I was in there a little

(55:28):
a little bit of a little bit of time, the
first off little bit thrown seeing the woman.

Speaker 1 (55:32):
In the Uh, I can imagine, yeah, but it made sense,
I understand, you know. Uh.

Speaker 3 (55:38):
Anyway, so I was probably in you know, ten minutes.
So I come out and paper menu is not at the.

Speaker 1 (55:45):
Booth, and uh.

Speaker 3 (55:48):
I go out and he's outside in the pung a lot.
I tell him this story. He's like, well, that's that's crazy,
like I would have been like I would have questioned
what room I'd walked into. And anyway, we out for
a couple of minutes. We go on our way and
I head over to a Barnes and Noble in the area, which,
by the way, Barnes and Noble will play into a

(56:09):
story for next episode. To remind me the Barnes and
Noble story, because there's a story about what happened there. Okay,
so I leave, I go to Barnes and Noble. A
thing happens at Barnes and Noble. My phone rings. It's
pay per menu. What's up, he says, Listen, I'm already
I'm already home. And I realize we left without paying

(56:29):
for the check. I go, what he said, Yeah, I
got up when you were in the bathroom and I
waited outside and I didn't remember to pay the check.
And then you came out and you didn't pay the check.
Oh no, waitress never brought the check. We both will
I go. Brodie's going to the bad Dam's going to
the bathroom. Was like, that's when the meal's over.

Speaker 1 (56:51):
So I'm like, no, no, I made an unintentional dining dash.

Speaker 3 (56:56):
So he so He says, I can't go back. I
gotta go pick up I have I have a very
important errand has to run. He said, I gotta go,
I gotta pick up my I gotta go do something.

Speaker 1 (57:06):
So I go, well, all right, i'll go, I'll go.

Speaker 3 (57:08):
I'll go right now, I'll stop what I'm doing and
I head outside and I get in the car. He
goes in the car, go, yeah, here's asshole. I paid
the check for both of us. I took care of
lunch today.

Speaker 1 (57:17):
Ah. He had me like he's basically phone tapping me.
He had me all in a panic that I walked
out on the check. That was actually kind of funny.
I ran on my car and he goes, yeah, I
paid the check. What do you think I was gonna
leave it out paying the check. I was in panic
mode because I'm you know, I'm honestly you know. So yeah.

Speaker 3 (57:36):
I was like, oh my god, I would never dine
in Dash. I was heading back to go pay for
the check, and he's like, no, go back, go back
in Barnes and Noble. So okay, have done? Would you
have stayed in Barnes and Noble shopping? I'm like, maybe
I'll go later I would have. I would have picked
an easy way out.

Speaker 1 (57:52):
I would have called into the restaurant and give him
my credit card over the phone, and I would have
been like, hey, sorry, we weft up. We but me
being an honest, forthright citizen, I'm gonna give you my
credit card and you just running over.

Speaker 3 (58:08):
The phone, So I would I would not have.

Speaker 1 (58:11):
Well, I would have been pissed if I had to
go back, because I just don't waste my time.

Speaker 3 (58:15):
Well, it's it was. It was sort of it wasn't
that far out of the way. But the point is
I was going to call them, like calling a head,
going hey, I'm coming back in a minute. I don't
want you to think like you know that we left there.
But no, he's always like, oh, yeah, we will. We
neither one of us paid the checks.

Speaker 1 (58:30):
I panicked. So would you have like hung out in
the store for a while and like taking your time?
Would you have like immediately called No, I would have
called immediately. I would have. Yeah, I got to get
that off my desk. I can't do it. I cannot.
If I know that I have a good debt to pay,
it's going to be on my mind, weighing heavily. I
have to have it cleared.

Speaker 3 (58:49):
So if you, if you owed money, or you you
had a debt, you would want it like wiped clean immediately.
You would want that hanging over your head, right except
for the one except for you. Fuck God, No, no, no,
I knew that.

Speaker 1 (59:02):
Was coming, but I had nothing to that. That has
nothing to do with the money. That's your head, not
hanging over my head. That's hanging over your head. For
whatever reason, you keep bringing it up. I bought you
a steak dinner twice. No, you did not.

Speaker 3 (59:14):
You did not buy me a steak dinner.

Speaker 1 (59:15):
You went.

Speaker 3 (59:18):
There was a steak dinner that you did not buy
me a steak down more than fulfilled my end of
the bar. Again, just a reminder. The deal was not
I will sit with you while we both eat steak.
The deal was, I will buy you a steak dinner
at a top five star steak dinner place your choice.
That did not happen. So wait, Volde Homesteads.

Speaker 1 (59:39):
Here we go. No, I'll go back to Delmonico's. I
love Delmonico's. Whatever, I'll tell you anyway, as soon as
my apartment sells, maybe I'll I'll buy you a steak dinner.
But this is a bonus one because I already paid
for the other one.

Speaker 3 (59:51):
No, no, no, no, no, I want you to admit that
you owe.

Speaker 1 (59:55):
Me to nake dinner. Let's worry about.

Speaker 3 (59:57):
That one of your apartments. What else you want to?
You have something else for us, because otherwise one thing before.

Speaker 1 (01:00:07):
Is just what we're dealing with here in the background
that this audio connection is it keeps dropping. We may
have to shorten this episode because I can't take it anymore.
We're having technical issues. But it's I think it's the Internet,
but anyway, it's not it's not my it's not my equipment. Okay,
let's be clear about that, all.

Speaker 3 (01:00:27):
Right, Yeah, yeah, I want to I want to talk
about my friend Scott. My friend Scott lives in Florida
and he's he I used to work with him in
New York and he's he's terrific rock guy and whatever. Anyway,
he loves the podcast and he always sends me stuff
that he thinks I could use on the podcast because
he knows that the sense of humor on on the podcast.
So he's always sending me screenshots from from like social

(01:00:53):
media accounts of people putting pictures up of their checks
at restaurants being charged for things that are unusual, like
last episode, I told you I got charged three dollars. Well, paperman,
you got charged three dollars for butter? Okay, So he
sends me a receipt from this account Captain t roll,
who who's complaining that a restaurant charged him scary. There's

(01:01:16):
a a twelve dollars fee. And the caption is who
eats their steak pink, I'm not a savage And and
the ticket says food reheat fee twelve dollars.

Speaker 1 (01:01:29):
What the guy?

Speaker 3 (01:01:31):
The guy is claiming that his food was undercooked? It
says filet mignon side of steak, fries, Dr. Pepper three dollars.
Food reheat fee twelve dollars. So he sent his food
back to be reheated and they charged him twelve dollars.
According to this social media account, I'm calling bullshit on that. Well,
I'm calling bullshit.

Speaker 1 (01:01:50):
There's no way, there's no way, who has the right
who can get away with that shit?

Speaker 3 (01:01:55):
Well, according to this social media post, which is a
it's a it's a receipt a received here looks very
legitimate from Dante's Steakhouse three fourteen Pershing Road, Kansas City, Missouri.
That sounds like a legitimate place, Kansas City known for
their beef.

Speaker 1 (01:02:10):
Right, the doctor checked, I think that's fucked up. No,
there's no way, there's no way this happened.

Speaker 3 (01:02:17):
So here's the thing. I went on Google Maps. Not
only is there no Dante's Steakhouse at three fourteen Persian
Road in Kansas City, but it's a warehouse. There's no
restaurants there, there's a post office, there's no steakhouse.

Speaker 1 (01:02:29):
This is fake, fake, fake, fake, fake fake. As fartimes, Yeah,
sometimes outrage on social media is fake outrage. Well that's
what people do. They love rage bait videos. They love that.
They love to put the post, you know, or they'll
they'll be a food influencer and they'll purposefully mispronounce of
food knowing that it's going to cause drama in the comments.

Speaker 3 (01:02:53):
They do that on purpose.

Speaker 1 (01:02:54):
At this point, they plant moments for you to like,
go off.

Speaker 3 (01:02:59):
Oh there's a guy. There's one of the food influences.
You and I both follow them. But they constantly say
mozzarella and they pronounce a lot of Italian food. Wrong, yeah, wrong, right,
Not just mozzarella, but there was I forget what it was,
but he went to a pizza place and he pronounced
the topping's wrong whatever it was, and the whole comments
section blew up, of course, and then.

Speaker 1 (01:03:21):
The algorithm leads people to the video and it goes
viral that way, because if something has got a lot
of comments, that means it's got a lot of attraction
and attention, and that's your way of that. That's the
hack to fool the computer into showing it to more people.
They're like, people must love this.

Speaker 3 (01:03:37):
So I'll give you one more and then we'll get
out of here. Paper menu sends me a video. Now
he knows it's a joke, but the comments section did not.
It's a video of a dash cam, so there's like
all So it's on a guy's on a parkway and
the cars going driving right in front of him, like
you know, like dashcam footage. And it's a mountain road

(01:03:58):
with all trees, tree lined mountain road and it says Brooklyn,
New York Belt Parkway. Now the Belt Parkway does not
have trees. There's no mountains in Brooklyn. There's there's like
you know.

Speaker 1 (01:04:13):
Weeds and and brown grass and uh, you know, metal
guard rails. It's not a scenic mountain road. The video
was like Zurich. It was like, you know, like the
roads in Germany. It was a beautiful mountain road in Germany.
All the cars are on the wrong side of the road.
It's obviously not the Belt Parkway in Brooklyn. With everyone

(01:04:35):
from Brooklyn, it's like, don't, don't, Brooklyn, do'st the Belt Parkway.
Everyone's getting upset and a lot of the people are
like making comments. So I made a comment like, oh,
that's right by King's Plaza, like I'm playing into the thing,
like I'm leaving it.

Speaker 3 (01:04:49):
Of course, some people are now yelling at me.

Speaker 1 (01:04:50):
What are you talking about? Start hearing it's it's terrific
so rage bait videos. Uh, it's so funny. It's so
obviously not accurate.

Speaker 3 (01:04:58):
Right Hi, Hey, they're all the rage literally.

Speaker 1 (01:05:03):
Oh all right, all right, listen, go fix your sound
system whatever you gotta fix.

Speaker 3 (01:05:07):
Over there.

Speaker 1 (01:05:08):
I think you'll see Internet and thank you new slices
for listening. Old Ones Boys, proclus

Speaker 3 (01:05:20):
Boys,