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February 13, 2026 12 mins

On today's poddy, Keyzie makes a shocking discovery.

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Featuring Jason Hoyte, Mike Minogue, and Keyzie, "The Big Show" drive you home weekdays from 4pm on Radio Hauraki.

Providing a hilarious escape from reality for those ‘backbone’ New Zealanders with plenty of laughs and out-the-gate yarns.

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Good stuff for all you lean bastards.

Speaker 2 (00:04):
Loving the Picture podcast, Get Up Even Closer.

Speaker 1 (00:08):
On Instagram, YouTube and ticktu off for for Dogger for
to seven every weekday on radio.

Speaker 3 (00:17):
Get a Feelers, Get a Keazy Hello, Chris, Hi, Michael,
how are you today?

Speaker 1 (00:22):
Good? Thank you?

Speaker 2 (00:24):
Hey, Chris. What's your middle name?

Speaker 4 (00:25):
Jason?

Speaker 1 (00:27):
It's w William William. Okay, what's yours?

Speaker 2 (00:30):
Is?

Speaker 4 (00:30):
Jason? Charles, Charles Hoyt, Michael, Vincent Mino.

Speaker 2 (00:34):
Yes, cool, yeah, okay, good.

Speaker 4 (00:37):
We'll not James James William as well. I think, how
are you.

Speaker 2 (00:40):
Going, fellers? How David told me to your day?

Speaker 1 (00:43):
Do you know what for your day?

Speaker 4 (00:44):
Do you know what I did?

Speaker 1 (00:45):
Put the pressure on au? So you just sit back
and so I tell us about your day, fellas, lean back.

Speaker 4 (00:54):
Yeah, and preferably for nine minutes about that.

Speaker 3 (00:57):
I didn't. I woke up today, right, that's good, that's good,
that's good. Chair, had a coffee, started watching. I watched
the second episode of the show Review today, which is
nine of the Seven Kingdoms, and then I haven't gone
outside my house until I left today. I haven't spoken
to anyone. I have been doing funk all right, great.

Speaker 2 (01:20):
Yeah, it is nice to have those kinds discuss what
the fuck it is?

Speaker 1 (01:26):
Just scattered, I have my mouth? What else I need
to do?

Speaker 2 (01:30):
Leave the room, foul beast.

Speaker 1 (01:32):
The not running some brother.

Speaker 4 (01:37):
Actually that's a good question.

Speaker 3 (01:39):
You know.

Speaker 4 (01:40):
I used to go outside and rip ass near your tomatoes?

Speaker 1 (01:42):
Are you going to go in the elevator at the
new place?

Speaker 2 (01:48):
Is that there's high ceilings.

Speaker 1 (01:51):
So what you climbing?

Speaker 4 (01:54):
So I bought a ladder.

Speaker 2 (01:55):
So I go into the room, into my room as.

Speaker 4 (02:01):
So, you bought a ladder.

Speaker 3 (02:05):
There's it's sort a floating shell with a few tomato
plants on it, like all fours.

Speaker 2 (02:11):
There's a good news. The good news is there's lots
of windows and it's a big open space.

Speaker 1 (02:16):
So I can't it the smell you're worried about. Not
the noise.

Speaker 2 (02:19):
Oh I know. I'm conscious of the noise when my
wife is present.

Speaker 1 (02:22):
That's what I'm concerned about. Yeah, I would hope you
wouldn't be going outside when you're alone to that. Oh
hell no, yeah, no, ship, no good. No.

Speaker 2 (02:32):
I rap pass when it's just me, and I enjoy it.
I genuinely enjoy ripping ass when I'm by myself.

Speaker 4 (02:41):
For some reason, I can't help. But I'm picturing Shenade
over an island listening to this.

Speaker 3 (02:45):
I've got Yeah, she looks like but you know, the toilet,
the photo perfect.

Speaker 1 (02:53):
If we could get an office photo, thanks very much,
that would be really nice. That would be cool, and
just put a certain around Shanade for Kezy.

Speaker 4 (03:01):
Can you not say that?

Speaker 2 (03:03):
Boy? I say. Kezy showed me something on his phone
yesterday that keeps popping up on his phone and he said, Jace,
who do you think.

Speaker 4 (03:15):
Yes, looks like it's I need to clarify what it is.

Speaker 3 (03:20):
It's a bot that you get sent into your hidden
requests on Instagram that's just churning out rat links and stuff, right,
And there's a whole lot of different fake people on
this one chat, but the same one keeps popping up.

Speaker 2 (03:33):
And he showed it to me mag and he said,
how do you think that looks like.

Speaker 4 (03:38):
In a bikini as.

Speaker 2 (03:39):
A woman, quite a voluptuous woman in a bikini, and
he said, I think that looks like your wife?

Speaker 1 (03:46):
And it was like, excuse me, you correct that?

Speaker 2 (03:49):
No I didn't. I was disgusted.

Speaker 3 (03:52):
No, same, and I feel bad about it. But it's
just the way that she looks when you look at
it quickly. Because it's such a small, little profile photo.
It looks like your wife.

Speaker 1 (04:01):
It shows me the difference in her eyesight. Because he
showed it to me, I said, he said, who does
that look like? I was fucked. I can barely tell
you're holding a phone.

Speaker 2 (04:12):
Was it because she was wearing glasses?

Speaker 4 (04:14):
Do you think it's the No? No, no, it's nothing
to do with the bussies. That's what makes it weird.
It's the brunette telling me.

Speaker 1 (04:20):
It makes it weird.

Speaker 4 (04:21):
It's the brunette with glasses.

Speaker 3 (04:23):
Because the woman in the photo, I would say, is
maybe like forty and is brunette with glasses and the
hair is out and this several times I've met your wife.

Speaker 4 (04:31):
She looks quite similar.

Speaker 1 (04:34):
See what he's down there?

Speaker 2 (04:37):
What like?

Speaker 4 (04:38):
I know it's weird, right, but it's just I'm just
telling you that it's.

Speaker 2 (04:41):
Really weird, man, And it's freaking man. But I can't
I met my wife when she's wearing a bikini.

Speaker 4 (04:46):
No, I said, it's the face and the hair and
the glasses.

Speaker 1 (04:49):
It's not the weird thing. Is the weirdest thing about
all of it? Is is it the woman in the photo?
Not that there's anything wrong with this is African American,
I know, and your wife is Caucasian?

Speaker 2 (05:01):
She is?

Speaker 3 (05:02):
Well, then who the hell did I see you with them?
The Big Show week days from four on Radio Hurarchymer
The Big Show Podcast.

Speaker 1 (05:18):
Send it off to the podcast.

Speaker 4 (05:19):
Can I show you the photo and you just verify it?

Speaker 1 (05:22):
You verify it. He's a verifier of Jason.

Speaker 4 (05:24):
He's an honest guy.

Speaker 2 (05:25):
Well, if anyone knows, if anyone knows, Buzzy, that's Pugsan.

Speaker 4 (05:31):
This photo needs the busy verification stamp.

Speaker 3 (05:35):
All right, look at the top photo there and tell
me whether that looks sort of like Jason's partner, does it?

Speaker 4 (05:42):
Yeah, it's the glasses choice. It's the same style of glass.

Speaker 1 (05:48):
I mean, I would have gone along the lines of
look this woman with her jags out, where's a similar
pair of glasses to Jason's wife? And then I would
have said nothing about it. And yet these two secos
look at them.

Speaker 2 (05:59):
I know, Well, what do you mean?

Speaker 4 (06:02):
I just got it verified by Pugs, who's a very
honest person.

Speaker 2 (06:05):
Wow, and it does when he just gets out of control, I.

Speaker 4 (06:09):
Won't have another look at the photo. Put your glasses on,
have another look.

Speaker 2 (06:12):
God's sake, genuinely, And I want to know what Maggie
did today.

Speaker 4 (06:17):
He had a bit of workman. Spoiler alert.

Speaker 2 (06:19):
The top photo, all I can see is busy.

Speaker 1 (06:23):
But just look above those there's the head there.

Speaker 4 (06:28):
Tell me that it doesn't look like you're wife.

Speaker 2 (06:30):
It doesn't look like my wife.

Speaker 4 (06:31):
Yes it does.

Speaker 1 (06:32):
I did a bit of work today. Oh did you
mean yeah, all day though, Yeah, I can't see it. Yeah, yeah,
that's great, man, It was pretty good. It was a
good day there. I had a good day. But I
haven't been to the gym all week. I've been too
busy working. But I tell you what I did have
is I had a good sleep last night. I went
to be at eight. Wow, we started to watch the

(06:54):
second episode. We're going to watch the second episode of
Night of the Seven Kingdom's Eer and it's just like,
you know, what fucked haven't we got? You know, it's
been separate bedrooms. Yeah, my wife's got a cough. Yeah
she still goes out, still got it, man, And she's
getting heaps of them chesty. I bullied her. She's a
shocking bastard. I've bullied her, bullied her into going to

(07:14):
the doctor because she never goes she's like you Jo,
she refused ago you're making. Then she'll making a point
which is ten years down the track. And to see
her doctor. She can't just see any person with a
medical degree. It has to be yes, her doctor. And
then she'll just forget it right. All very convenient.

Speaker 2 (07:34):
I will say, on my behalf, if I do make
an appointment, I will go there.

Speaker 1 (07:37):
We're a backbone. It's just I never make an appoint
And she gets lots of coughs. And the reason why
I know it's her is because I catch everything and
I've never caught a cough off her, but last year
she must have had five of them.

Speaker 2 (07:49):
Do you reckon?

Speaker 1 (07:49):
She's outrage She should get off the darts and the
purse man she was on them. She's never had a
cigarette or even a puff of a cigarette. Wow, Yeah,
that's amazing that. It's pretty good, isn't it. It's really sure
that for what it was right from the start. Yes,
it was old Keesy started in his thirty is the
piece of ship he did.

Speaker 2 (08:06):
I haven't had a cigarette making going.

Speaker 3 (08:08):
I haven't had a cigarette since last time, since the
last hucky thing where like Maniah and Beck and stuff
ahead well, neither should you.

Speaker 1 (08:15):
Give How are you going on the vapes shows?

Speaker 2 (08:18):
I don't have a vape Just fuck me.

Speaker 1 (08:20):
I'm asking for an update on the fact that you've
given up vape dum.

Speaker 2 (08:25):
It's okay. It's been a very I've had moments of
stress this week and I've gone I need to suck
you just suck on something.

Speaker 4 (08:36):
But if you've just dealt with it without needing their vave,
it's great.

Speaker 1 (08:40):
Good for you. I'm really very good. What a mental
thing that you go to when you're feeling like because
you always have these things that pop up in you.
You could be weak, but you sort of have the
mental thing that you go do to talk yourself out
of it. What are you going with?

Speaker 2 (08:53):
What I go with is that I've realized, and I've
said this before, that within two minutes I'll be thinking
of something else, so I just don't do something else
and then it just leaves my brain.

Speaker 1 (09:02):
Yeah, that's good, you know what I mean?

Speaker 2 (09:05):
And yeah, because I'm walking around everywhere, I don't know
it's weird.

Speaker 1 (09:10):
Well, it's good. Yea home game with I've had my
fun yes, fair enough, I've had my phone. Yeah, yeah,
because I've seen what I saw some photos of some
mates for younger mates and they're at a wedding or
something and smoking darts, you know, So that looks good
and I thought, but I've had my phone, it was good.
I've done my dish.

Speaker 2 (09:29):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (09:30):
You know.

Speaker 3 (09:30):
What I saw yesterday while I was driving home was
a cool old convertible car from like the seventies and
a girl in her mid twenties driving it and smoking
a dart. Yeah, so cool, And I was like that
maybe the fucking coolst shit I've ever seen. And it
was manual, and so she was she was had the
dart in her right hand and then when the traffic moved,

(09:51):
she had to leave it in this like in her
mouth hand on the wheel changing gear and took it.

Speaker 4 (09:56):
And I was just like, as a fucking did you
find that hat? Did fucking oath?

Speaker 1 (09:59):
I did?

Speaker 2 (10:00):
Did you go home?

Speaker 1 (10:01):
And no?

Speaker 3 (10:02):
I went home to my lovely wife and I was
just like that, God.

Speaker 1 (10:11):
You're right. But then I also saw an old fellow
doing something similar. It might have been Vincent Casell or
something like that, you know, yeah, you know the activist. Yes,
he's a French chector and same saying I'm hanging off
with that. But I know, I know he wakes up
of the morning coughs, is wrung out, and I know
he hates himself because he still smokes. That kind of

(10:32):
ruins it.

Speaker 2 (10:33):
My step mom she was a shock like that. The
first ten minutes of every day. She'd just be hacking
her lungs out. And but I never had that. I
I don't know if you did it, but I never
used to wake up and cough cough, cough, cough cough.

Speaker 1 (10:45):
It's never been had a complete absence of it like
you but Rolie as I could smoke and I didn't
really get it. You get the cough. But if I
had been on the tailor's yes, But now it's gotten
to the point where I get it when i'm smoking, yes,
just yeah, it's just not it. It's not cool. It's
not smoking and then just hacking, coughing.

Speaker 3 (11:07):
I think the thing the reason why that that girl
I saw was cool was because she was so young,
and usually they'll be hanging off a vape frame.

Speaker 4 (11:13):
Well, it was because she was like the most most.

Speaker 3 (11:15):
Woman that you'd see driving a seventies car and smoking
a dart are in there, like sixties.

Speaker 1 (11:21):
Well you don't see any of those things.

Speaker 4 (11:22):
No, totally by outwist.

Speaker 3 (11:27):
But because she was, she wasn't on a vape and
she wasn't driving a VW golf. It was the durry
instead and the oldest fuck cart. I'm with you, Hey, Jase,
could you tell your wife to stop messaging me on Instagram?

Speaker 1 (11:40):
Man, you're a filthy glass. We go to bring this
up when we come around for dinner next Friday'll tell
you what fantastic see she looks.

Speaker 4 (11:50):
Like okay for one hundred percent.

Speaker 3 (11:52):
But what I don't want is for people to think
I'm weird because this bot has started.

Speaker 4 (11:57):
Doing that to me and it just happens to her.
You know, why don't we do this?

Speaker 3 (12:01):
But it's a bart Why don't we put a photo
up on the Instagram story of your wife?

Speaker 2 (12:06):
We will fucking not be doing that.

Speaker 1 (12:09):
This is a big show weekdays. Ready, headache,
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