Don't sneeze on people

Just as with germs, it's best to avoid spreading anxiety and anger

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning.
This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's
tip is to not spread distress like germs. Sometimes it
is necessary to share a concern so it can be solved,

(00:26):
But when you are simply making conversation, whether in real
life or online, steer clear from content that will result
in frustration, anxiety, or anger, because who needs more of
that in their lives. Today's tip comes from Oliver Berkman,

(00:46):
author of the books Meditations for Mortals and four Thousand Weeks.
In his newsletter The Imperfectionist, Berkman referred to alarmist news
about AI, but explained why he wasn't linking to those
articles himself. I'm not going to link to any of
these contagious anxiety spreading pieces for the same reason I

(01:09):
don't go around actively sneezing in people's faces when I
catch a cold. It's a funny analogy and a wise one.
It is bad enough if you have a cold, There
is no reason to try to purposefully spread it to
other people. And it is the same with rage bait

(01:30):
in general. Now, certainly there are times when we have
bad news or concerns that we do need to share
with people, either because they might help solve it or
because we need help figuring out how to respond. But
if you are looking for conversation starters or content to
post online op for the positive, don't go around sneezing

(01:52):
in other people's faces. So in general, you probably don't
want to share troubling news unless you pair it with
constructive action that people can take. Your friends might be
happier not reading the latest clickbait article about the various
ailments of middle age unless you or the article itself

(02:13):
also offer strategies for dealing with these ailments. I am
pretty sure we are all tired of hearing about how
AI is going to take our jobs and destroy human
relationships and maybe the planet. At the same time. If
you want to read articles that make you mad or stressed,
that's fine, but don't assume that anyone else wants to

(02:35):
read them. You don't want to sneeze on people with
gossip about people and institutions either. For instance, it is
probably not helpful to speculate about your employer's financial troubles,
or to recount what your officemate said about a friend
of hers who got a bad performance review, or to

(02:55):
tell everyone you know about your cousin's neighbors daughter who
make straight a's and still didn't get into any of
her top ten college choices. You can keep that stressful
news to yourself. I think sometimes people may share anxiety
or anger inducing content because it feels good to get

(03:17):
a reaction from other people. The anxiety or anger you
are sparking is probably not any more welcome than a cold.
So when you consider sharing content or news that might
cause worry or frustration, ask yourself why. If there is

(03:37):
constructive action that could come out of it. Great. It
is certainly fine to ask friends to donate alongside you
to a cause, or to write to leaders alongside you
to try to spark change. But otherwise, if it's just
engagement and reaction you are aiming for, let the sneezing

(03:58):
stop with you. In the meantime, This is Laura. Thanks
for listening, and here's to making the most of our time.
Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas,

(04:21):
or feedback, you can reach me at Laura at Laura
vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartMedia.
For more podcasts from iHeartMedia. Please visit the iHeartRadio app,
Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.