Keep the old

You can't make an old friend, so warm up the relationships you have

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning,
This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's
tip is to invest in your old friendships. You cannot
make an old friend. You can make a new one

(00:26):
who might become an old one, but you can't just
make an old one. So figure out ways to sustain
the longtime friendships you value, and you will probably be
happier overall. So, as the Childhood's song advises, we are
wise to make new friends but keep the old as

(00:48):
our lives unfold. It's great to make new friends who
share our current experiences and priorities, and it is natural
that older friendships ebb and flow. We go through more
or less close times as people have other stuff in
their lives or inter phases of life at different times.

(01:09):
But even so, it is wise to thoughtfully maintain the
old friendships we value, because you can't make an old friend,
and it is quite possible that a time will come
in life when you will want to be close again.
So think about people you have been close with in
the past, and think about how you might warm up

(01:32):
these relationships. If you sometimes text with a friend, suggest
getting together for coffee or lunch, or you might do
something else that revives an old shared interest. If you
used to play soccer together, maybe you could watch a
major soccer match together at a sports bar. Of course,

(01:53):
I know one of the biggest barriers to maintaining old
friendships is that many of us don't live near our
old friends. People move for school, for work, for family,
and because we don't see each other in our day
to day lives, we can't maintain the connections as easily.
But technology is so helpful these days. You might suggest

(02:15):
a zoom meet up with an old friend and I
am sure you will find yourself chatting pretty easily. Or
this is an important realization, you can travel. Even just
seeing someone once a year can maintain a relationship pretty
well if you've got some flexibility with your time and

(02:36):
some disposable income, as I know is true for a
lot of people who listen to this podcast. You can
get in your car or get on a plane and go.
If it has truly been a while and you want
to ease into things, you can identify people you are
once close to and come up with a plausible reason

(02:58):
you would be in the area. Lots of us can
do many things for work, or we could go to
concerts or shows or visit extended family members and stop
by and see an old friend on the way. Then
once you have done that, it will be a lot
easier to maintain the connection. You send texts and photos

(03:21):
and keep them posted on your life. Life is long.
It feels good to have friends on the journey who
share past memories and experiences with us. So if there
is an old friend who has been on your mind lately,
consider reaching out. Renewing your friendship could give you a
sense of connection to the old friend and to your

(03:44):
past self too. I'd love to hear about your experiences
maintaining or rekindling old friendships. You can reach me at
Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. In the meantime, this
is Laura. Thanks for listening, and here's to making the
most of our time. Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast.

(04:15):
If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach
me at Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast
is a production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts from iHeartMedia,
please visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you

(04:37):
listen to your favorite shows,