Make it easy to strike up a conversation

Making your interests visible invites people to connect

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning.

Speaker 2 (00:10):
This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's
tip is to offer little, visible hints about what you're
interested in. This will make it easier for people to
strike up a conversation with you, which can make the
world feel a little smaller and more warm. Today's tip

(00:36):
was inspired by an article in The New York Times
by Jillian Sandstrom. She recommends initiating conversations with people whose
interests are visible.

Speaker 1 (00:46):
As she puts it. To illustrate what she means, the
article offers the example of a band, t shirt, a
museum tote bag, an antique brooch, or a book the
person is reading. Each gives a little window into what
the person likes in starting a conversation. It would seem

(01:08):
to help if you also like that band or museum,
or into classic jewelry, or have read something by the
author of that book. But even if the visible interest
isn't one you share, you can feel reasonably confident that
the other person may be open to chatting about it
if you mention it. This seems like a great idea,

(01:31):
and I would propose a twist on it, which is
an additional way to invite connection, make your own interests
visible to the broader world. For instance, if you love
talking about your cat, make a photo of your cat
the wallpaper for your cell phone. Use a keyring promoting

(01:52):
an arts organization you love. Sport a conversation starter scarf
that you bought when you were trapped in a place
you find special. Carry a tope bag with a quote
from the obscure Victorian novel that you have read a
dozen times. Where athletic attires celebrating your favorite team or

(02:16):
your alma mater. Little hints at what you're into can
serve as invitations for like minded people to say hello.
I can tell you, for example, that when my husband
wears a Texas A and M T shirt, people randomly
come up to him on the street and say gig em.
Most of these actions are fun but brief. Occasionally, though,

(02:40):
people connect with him about someone they both knew, or
an era at the school. Not only do visible interests
make it easier for strangers to strike up a conversation,
they can also seed conversations with acquaintances. Swag from the
college you attended, or photo of you and your family
at a favorite travel desc nation or calendar with images

(03:02):
from an artist you love. Items like these on your
desk or in your zoom background can offer a starting
point for chitchat with people you already know. Suddenly Mark
from accounting becomes Mark who also loves Matisse and wants
to know if you've ever been to the Barns. You

(03:25):
and the quiet assistant from the marketing team start trading
recommendations of your favorite New Orleans restaurants, and you eagerly
await her report before that Monday meeting. When you know
she recently went back there for a weekend. Your fellow
Alabama alum starts signing her emails to you roll tide role,

(03:48):
and your world starts to feel pleasantly small. So if
you want more connection in your life, try making your
interests visible. Consider what you like to chat about, and
identify cues to let people know of those interests. In
the meantime, this is Laura, Thanks for listening, and here's

(04:13):
to making the most of our time. Thanks for listening
to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback,
you can reach me at Laura at Laura vandercam dot com.

(04:37):
Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts
from iHeartMedia, please visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or
wherever you listen to your favorite shows.