All Episodes

June 11, 2024 30 mins

This Pride Month, we check in on Anney to get an update, both personally and politically.

See for privacy information.

Mark as Played

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
Hey, this is any and Samantha holcovery stuff. I never
told you a production. If I heard you.

Speaker 2 (00:18):
Peek behind the curtains, I've already messed up this episode
one or twice. So hey everybody. So we have always
said specifically about this segment of feminists around the world
that we want to make sure we are giving flowers
to those who are making a difference that are with
us still, but we don't want to wait till it's
too late and not recognize what they have been doing

or what they are doing. And that includes our very
own people. So for Pride Month, we wanted to highlight
one of your and my favorite hosts. Any should I
say your last name? I typically don't.

Speaker 1 (00:55):
Any rees thank you? Yeah, that's r.

Speaker 2 (01:00):
And You've been so gracious to share your story when
it comes to discovering your identity and like hashing out
some of the things that you have worked through and
just sharing it with so many And I know, like listeners,
you're right there with me when you say thank you
so much, because a lot of it has really really
resonated with you, and you felt like being you felt

like you just were seen because they have stories like you. Annie,
and again like one of those things that you really
discovering yourself in real time with me and the listeners.
So I thought, you know, we need to talk about
you as a feminist activist because as you are doing
this with so much vulnerability and openness, you are doing

some of the amazing work for the queer people LGBT,
QUI A plus peoples. And first and foremost, give you
those flowers and say thank you, but also check in
with you, and I highlight you for feminists around the world.
So first and foremost, let's check in. How are you?
How are you celebrating this fabulous month.

Speaker 1 (02:07):
I'm nervous, nervous to be the highlight. I will be
honest with you. I've been really busy, and you are
the one that has planted in this in me, this
idea I need to celebrate and I should. You're right,
I have just been going about my life and I
barely know what time it is anymore. I went home

for the first weekend of June, so I haven't yet,
but I will, and I do have a trip coming
up as an end of June, and I think i'll
I'll try to make that a big blowout. I'll bust
out my Ace shirt and all those things. But yeah,

I haven't. I haven't celebrated yet. I will say, Okay,
it's coming. It was common Toad, you a cupcake or
a cake.

Speaker 2 (03:01):
I know you've been more and more open to talking
about your self discovery with lots of people, and not
just our listeners, even though like you don't have to,
but you do in some of this. Some of those
people include your family. How has that been for you?
And can you give advice to our listeners who may
be in a similar journey, especially on how to be

both vulnerable but at the same time I being able
to guard yourself.

Speaker 1 (03:30):
Yeah, I mean, this is something we've talked about a lot.
It can be really difficult when it's we're in this
field that we're in, or you're just somebody who believes
really strongly or passionately about something about LGBTQ plus rights
or intersexual feminism or whatever. It can be really hard
to find the line of that. I will say, I'm

generally really lucky in that my immediate family obviously most
of my closest friends are cool, I'll all say. But
even with that, because it's been like it's in a
book that I wrote about coming out and it's this
this podcast I talked about it. It's like out there.

And so now that kind of line of maybe I
don't want to say something right now is gone. It
feels like it's gone because they know and that I
think a lot of us can relate to that, whether
you have podcasts or you're open about it or not.
But it just feels like there's almost a strange and

I know a lot of people can relate on maybe
not even being queer, but on similar things. It's a
strange like head turning that happens to me now, where
if something about LGBTQ plus stuff comes up, people turn
and they look at me, and so it's sort of

a it's a you know, and I hate it because
I do like talking about it and I am passionate
about it, and a lot of times it's fine, but
you never know that initial head turn moment. You don't
know right. And so there's been a bit of that
and a bit of like honestly, really genuinely, people want

to know more and do better, and I appreciate that,
but I'm still I still feel kind of like a baby.
I feel like I'm doing my best and I'm reading
what I can, but I still feel like a like
straight passing baby. So it's sort of and we talked

about this in our recent Sex in the City episode. Yeah,
funnily enough, but it's not like you suddenly get all
the answers right when you come out and that there
isn't sad divisions within the LGBTQ plus can Ny itself.
So I have felt I feel better about that, but

I'm still nervous. Like when I go to a Pride event,
I'm still nervous, so I'm like, oh, what if they
don't think I should be here? So that's been that.
It's also funny because we've talked about this before too.
A lot of the backlash around Pride months from people
who don't think it should exist is that it's like

it draws too much attention. I really don't want that
much attention, but it's like, but it feels like you're
looking at me with your head turn right. So it's
just been interesting to adjust to that part, I think.
But almost everyone's been really supportive and genuinely wants to

learn more.

Speaker 2 (06:55):
Yeah, I find it funny because when people are like
they're shoving it in our faces outside of the fact
that I purposely follow people that are like LGBTQIA plus
or the fact that my algorithm has it because I
purposely watch these things. You can absolutely not know or

pay attention to any of this really easily, which is
like unfortunate for you, because this is great stuff and
these are some amazing people, and like being a part
of a celebration that celebrates people's love and life should
be a thing. But the fact that people are so
pressed about this because they're like they're shoving it though
they're not, They're just existing. This is the weirdest thing
because they have one parade you're really upset, which you

could just stay home and I was at home or me.
They have rainbow flags, which you used to love rainbows.
It's just a rainbow flag. Get over it. And you
don't have to buy it. That's the other part of that.
You don't have to buy any of these things. So
I don't understand how it's shoved into your face.

Speaker 1 (07:58):
Yeah, either, because again, I'd be perfectly happy living my
life never talking about with my homophobic family members of
this mean specifically, I'll stand up, but I'm I don't
feel like I'm shoving it down your road exactly.

Speaker 2 (08:16):
Existing is not shoving it down your throat. You're just hating,
end of the point. And I was just going to
ask you just the top of your head, but you
wouldn't do research mode on those because you are you
and I love you for it. Uh, there's been so

much going on when it comes to queer policies or
anti queer policies and anti lgbtqy policies, plus what are
some things that you think we should be paying attention to.

Speaker 1 (08:48):
Well, it's funny because before this you were like, I
didn't really mean to make this into research for you,
and it really wasn't. It really wasn't. I've been thinking
about this. I have some other episodes like on my mind,
but it is something where I feel, again going back
to that point, like I have to provekay. I'm like, see.

Speaker 2 (09:09):
Oh you oh you're by prove it?

Speaker 1 (09:11):
Oh yeah, to prove it? Oh no, yes, yes, But
that's that's like my own baggage. And I think a
lot of people have it for one thing or another,
but I but I legitimately I have been looking into
this for just as a person, but also as episodes

that are coming up, but okay. So, as of May
thirty first, twenty twenty four, the ACLU is tracking five
hundred and fifteen anti LGBTQ bills in the US. They
have a really cool graphic and you can click on
every state and see what they are. From the Washington Post,
the UN Human Rights Committees review into the state of

human rights in the United States the first and nine
years express concern quote at the increase in the number
of state laws that severely restrict the rights of persons
on the basis of their sexual orientation our gender identity.
A post analysis of FBI data published in March found
that hate crimes in schools have risen sharply in recent years,
with the starkest impact in states where LGBTQ plus students

face restrictive laws, and last year, Canada issued a warning
to queer people thinking of traveling to the US. So
it's pretty bad, honestly, A lot of times when I
go to Pride events, that's one of the things I
think of. Once again, not unique to gay people, but
it is something that I think of. I will say,

as our recent classics have indicated local politics are so important,
so I would say keep an eye on that we
were talking about libraries and curriculum that are banning queer material,
among a bunch of other things that is really detrimental

to us. So many times on the show, I've said
I wish I had this as a kid, and they
always act like it's like, oh, well, it's turning you gay. No,
it's helping you, like realize, it's like giving you a
voice to a thing you feel.

Speaker 2 (11:23):
Just the level of like ignorance, it's turning you gay.
He's like, yeahs not how that works, but you do you.

Speaker 1 (11:31):
Boo, No, it's not at all. And so that that's
been that's been on the Rise. We talked about that
in our episode on the Rise in band books. We
talked about that in genderquer which is our book club
pick for Pride Month last year, still the most banned
book in the United States. So I think that's really important.
If you can support your local libraries, uh not. You know, Unfortunately,

as with many things you're going to talk about, it's
not like all libraries are great. But yeah, if you
do your research and it seems like a good library,
then support your local library elections. I know people are
tired about hearing about it. I know it's frustrating. I
hear you, I hear you. But there are so many

elections that are really leaning into kind of this anti
LGBTQ plus thing. There's one in Missouri where the whole
slogan is don't be weak and gay. The Colorado Republican
Party is calling for people to burn the Pride flag
at the start of Pride Month, which like, if you
buy the Pride flag, that kind of makes me laugh,

But okay, do you yeah, spend that money? All right?
From Axios quote as Pride Month begins Saturday, Floridians will
notice a bvid difference. Instead of casting rainbows bridges around
the state, we'll only light up in red, white and blue.
The Dasantus administry, which issued this year's ban on rainbow lights,

is calling it Freedom Summer. Yeah cool? Correct?

Speaker 2 (13:12):

Speaker 1 (13:14):
And that was of a really interesting article from Maxios
about how Florida became one of the most anti LGBTQ
plus states, and it had this other quote. Some trans
people and their families have relocated to more accepting states.
Others have turned to crowdfunding platforms like gofund me hoping
to do so, which is just tragic and I hate

it for a lot of reasons. But one of the things,
and I know we have this conversation with Bridget forever
go off mic, but one of the things that breaks
my heart about this is if people leave, then it's
going to get like more staunch, right, But I also
can't blame you for leaving me.

Speaker 2 (13:52):
That's and for those who can't afford to leave, they're
stuck with the even more staunch is such a bad
level of like it, how do you cut this circle?
But at the same time, you don't want to be
at Texas as a great example of what's happening, and
people are really like, maybe this is not is we
need to go. We need to go, And it became

more and more not because everybody's leaving, but those who
can are leaving, and then those who are stuck are stuck,
and it's kind of one of those lamboles. And then
with that, with a little more increase in power, they
get more power by jerrymandering into a bigger situation, which
is exactly what's happening in a lot of the different states.
And we know jerium mandering happens in both routes, but

we've seen it like in this tenfold of like what
is the silly squiggly line that you've made into a
district that and then it separates a little bit. It's
like an exclamation point. How is this one district? And
that's because you know, like it's become that level. But
the fact that this is a continued level of power.
And I said to our listeners in Texas, we know,
like people, things are shifting in Texas. Don't get me wrong.

I think things have kind of shifted in Florida. We've
seen the different candidates who are like flipped a few
parties and I'm like, all right, go ahead, But in
this level also of like this feels even more so
like choosing the lesser evil.

Speaker 1 (15:12):
Yeah. Yeah, that article that I just mentioned, they said
it's turning in Florida slowly, but surely, or at least
this year. It doesn't seem to be as a big
People aren't so into this, like right, anti gay agenda.

Speaker 2 (15:28):
Right, They're starting to realize, oh, this doesn't make us
much sense. I think when they started going after Disney,
they're like, oh, and there you're hurting our pockets, right,
and my fun this is not this is you. You
did not include this as a part of you are
we have to hate people, right?

Speaker 1 (15:48):
Yeah, so yeah, that's just something we'll probably come back
and have a bigger conversation about that. But and that
leads into we talked about this all the time, but
a big thing to keep an eye on is anti
trans walls and rhetoric. Recent polling has found that support
of the queer community has gone up in the US

except for trans people, where it's gone down, right, and
that like if you think it doesn't matter when people
just say politicians just say things, or people just say things,
it does right, and it's dangerous.

Speaker 2 (16:25):
And this is like the modern day example of white
feminism when they were like, yes, we want feminism, but
mainly if you if the black women don't get it,
that's okay, we're gonna work on us first. That's kind
of the same LGBTQ like ideal where they leave out
the tea in that Okay, but we're gonna work on
this first and then we'll come back to you and
like no, no, no, you need to reverse that because

what you're seeing is that the most marginalized will continue
to stay marginalized and not everyone will be free. As
where if you start with the most marginalized, everyone will
be free. Like it's kind of like, yeah, and this
is that real life translation that we're seeing.

Speaker 1 (17:00):
Yeah, and if you look at the laws, a lot
of them are specifically aimed towards trans people, right, and
going along with that, like, I would just keep an
ear out for weaponized use of terms like grooming and
pedophiles when it comes to gay folks, because I'm seeing
it more normalized now.

Speaker 2 (17:18):
And it's, oh you are that's interesting, I'm seeing it.

Speaker 1 (17:24):
I feel like it used to be more like wink wink,
you know what I mean, And now it's much more
We've just become more polarized in general as a society.

Speaker 2 (17:38):
I think it's definitely this level of like fantasy versus
reality again. What we talked about what grooming looks like
and who is actually being groomed and who are actually
being trafficked. And we just had this conversation with Bridget
when it came to like Playboy magazine and like they're
actually a great example of like who you want to
see as victims and so would that they also want

to say who they want to see as the perpetrators.

Speaker 1 (18:04):
Yeah, they I can't. I feel like you're the one
who can't you can't stop talking about that.

Speaker 2 (18:11):
There's a thing of like, the many arrests that I've
seen have typically been one who's like group of people
and they are your friends.

Speaker 1 (18:21):
Ruh, Yeah, that's a good point of Yeah.

Speaker 2 (18:30):
Rarely have I ever seen No, I don't think there
has been any conversation of trans person being a groomor
like into that level of like, don't get me wrong,
grooming happens all over the place, and we know that
things happen, but when it comes especially with trafficking, you're like,
and once again, I do not see a drag wing
up in this thing.

Speaker 1 (18:50):
Yeah yeah, but they love to talk about it and
act like that's the case, and that's the terminology they use,
and it's incredibly har hardful, and people have been attacked.
So I think that's something to keep an eye out
for if you want to see some bombastic language. I'm
going to come back and talk about this for my
happy hour, I think. But the Queer Planet documentary that's

coming out, the number of people in my life who've
told me you can't be gay. Animals aren't gay, and
now they have this documentary that's like gay Animals, which
I haven't seen, so who knows. It could be terrible.
But now they're like this is propa good. H Like, well,

you've been telling me my whole.

Speaker 2 (19:33):
Life you're doing this thing, so you do you b.

Speaker 1 (19:39):
I love that you compare me to an animal. Thanks
also if.

Speaker 2 (19:43):
You want to go into that, and we lived in
that whole leg like some of the women kill the
men and then they keep on perpetuating and maybe we
should do something. Is that the theory can a defense?
Which what is it?

Speaker 1 (19:58):
Yeah? Yeah? And then like I have a lot of
religious they're not friends, but they're like on my periphery.
And the whole thing with the Pope really blew up
recently where he said some pretty dad things, yeah about
gay people behind doors, and he's been like progressive for
the Catholic Church. But they definitely took that as a win. Okay,

international stuff, listeners, please write in and let us know
because this is mostly US based. I have read stuff
that's going on that isn't great around the world, but
I found some good news as well. More than thirty
countries have now legalized gay marriage on the federal level.
In the US, several protections have been upheld are put

in place, and just because I had to look going
back to that ACLU map quote. In Georgia, every proposed
anti LGBTQ plus bill was defeated, including bills related to
marriage schools and drag performances. And I read some of
them and they were like, what entries.

Speaker 2 (21:01):
I mean, it's from like the Marjorie Taylor Green Playbook
to making the most extreme as possible, so knowing that
you won't win, but you can say you did that
and you are a champion of conservative families.

Speaker 1 (21:14):
That is. There's a lot of things, a lot of
things I don't like about American politics, but one of
them is that posturing. I hate that agreed, agreed.

Speaker 2 (21:25):
But I'm glad to know that it's been a shutdown.
Come on, Georgia, we're getting.

Speaker 1 (21:28):
There slowly, slowly anyway.

Speaker 2 (21:31):
There's a lot of other things that's not hood but slowly.
So with that, thank you for all. It's like all
that research because I was like, oh no, I just
meant for you to share old Okay, okay, but of

course I should have known any I thought about taking
that question off.

Speaker 1 (21:56):
To be honest, I'm like, she's gonna end.

Speaker 2 (21:57):
Up working a lot on this, but from your first
episode of coming out to to today, do you feel
like you've progressed in your learning about yourself and how
you're communicating it and telling your story and even like
what you've learned and like maybe this is the part
that I'm like you not that you wish you could
take back, but now that you know, you're like, these

are the things that maybe I would have filtered out
or not or things that you wish you would added before.

Speaker 1 (22:24):
Yeah, I think it's when I look back, it was
it was such a like bright shiny revelation. But on
the flip side, I was so scared. I was so
vulnerable and I felt so scared about it, and I
felt like it wasn't right or could be this problem
or this problem or trying to explain it away, and

then I felt like I don't belong in the queer community.
And then I had a lot of doubts. But it
was exciting, Like it was really like it felt right,
even if I was worried other people wouldn't see it
that way, Like I was going back and thinking about
what my axes would think. Why. But now I feel

much more settled in it. I still have moments of
I don't know. Fear might be too strong a word,
but I still have moments of like, I don't know
how people might judge me or something like that. I
have moments where i run into someone who does judge me,
and I'm kind of shocked because I'm in my bubble
that is wonderful and nice, but I forget it's not

like that if I go outside of that sometimes, and
for a while, I just was so worried people would
think like, oh, she's a sad single woman. And now
I'm kind of like, I don't care if you want
to think that I'm good. So I think a lot
of it has been I've just sort of settled into

it and I'm happy with it. It doesn't have the
same kind of bright excitement did at the beginning. It's
more just like, Yeah, that's that's what it is. That's
my personality.

Speaker 2 (24:06):
Where you're you're becoming a senior than this and that
you said, I still feel like your baby. But at
the same time you realize all these things, which was
a big deal, but you're like, but this makes sense
and it's my life. Yeah, I'm cool with this. And
the fact that the people who loved you the most
are like, yeah, okay, that makes sense. Things were telling us.

Speaker 1 (24:27):
Yeah, that's pretty much been the reaction, and it's been
like one of the best reactions I could have ever asked.

Speaker 2 (24:33):
Here's some gloves I bought you, which was my old mama.
I was like, oh, baby, bisexual, let me get you
some colors. Yeah, I'm old anyway. Uh And with that,
of course, do you have any organizations that you would

like to highlight for us listeners so we can also
be uh an ally in this journey.

Speaker 1 (25:05):
Yes, it comes with an unfortunate disclaimer that I think
we all know. I always do your research first, because
there's some organizations that, like you think are good and
you find something out later, are they change? They can
make amends. But in point, if I say something in here,
if I shout out someone in here and you know
that they've done something that's not great, because I hate that.

It's true. But as I said, there is in finding
and judgment within the queer community as well, right, so.

Speaker 2 (25:37):
Also there's greed and.

Speaker 1 (25:40):
Yes, absolutely anything, yes, please please let me know. Because
I was definitely supporting an organization that I later found
out not so great.

Speaker 2 (25:51):
Write I did the same and I was like oh
he stole all the money.

Speaker 1 (25:54):
Oh well damn. Yes. So I always get kind of
nervous doing this, but but these these are some that
came to mind. I will say, like, if you need resources,
you can reach out to us, and I have some
that I have some very like asexuality specific ones just

for information, but there are a lot for however you
may identify or your sexual orientation. Again, do your research
because there can be misinformation and disinformation. But if you
if you want any of that, you can reach out
some organizations. I'm going to start with two of the
big ones that like people know, but I'm going to

shut them out glad because we use them all the
time in research and so personally thank you. But they
do a lot of like media studies around the LGBTQ
plus community. The Trevor Project, which is about suicidality and
suicide prevention within the queer community. Snack Coo, which was

started in Atlanta, Yeah I did not know, which is
about specifically trans black people, but queer people in prison
and getting like stopping that pipeline and fixing helping to
fix that. Transgender Law Center, and Immigration Equality, which is
about things like refugees and making sure that they have

their rights and the things that they need.

Speaker 2 (27:28):

Speaker 1 (27:29):
So yeah, those are awesome.

Speaker 2 (27:32):
Thank you, Thank you for letting me put you on
the spot. Just so y'all know, I did give her
a heads up and ask her first before we will
come at me, would you make her do this? I
know I'm cool, but again, we are all about wanting
to share and be vulnerable with you, as well as
the fact that we are all about wanting to give

flowers to you and acknowledge that you are a feminist
activist around the world and we love you for what
you do, your vulnerability, just for being you and existing
and loving us enough to trust us with who you are.
So an we celebrate you. Happy Pride month. I'll bring

you okay sometimes soon, I swear to God. Thank you
and honestly listeners. If you have a story about your
own coming out or just being vulnerable or just learning
about your identity as well, like I know you have
written to us before, especially to Annie, to thank her
for her journey and relating to her and or advice

giving our advice about your own coming out, and you
want to share your story and you want us to
share with for you, please do we would we love
listener mill Yes, and we would love to feature that
on a feminist activist around the world because you existing,
unfortunately and the agent time like this and you being
who you are is a form of activism. That doesn't
mean unfortunately as in like you existing, but unfortunately that

sometimes being who you are can come out a cost
and we know that, we know that, we see that
and we love you for who you are. So if
you have a story, let us.

Speaker 1 (29:08):
Know, yes. And thank you to you, Samantha for being
so supportive as I've done, as I've figured this out
for the cake part, Auntie. You listeners truly who've written
in and given me advice or given me resources that
was It's been amazing, So thank you, thank you, thank you.

You can email u at Stephania moms Stuff at iHeartMedia
dot com. You can find us on Twitter at mom
Stuff podcast, or in Instagram and TikTok at stuff One
Never told you. We're also on YouTube. We have a
tea public store and we have a book where we
talk about this stuff. You can find it wherever you
get your books. Thanks as always too, our super producer Christina,
our executive ducer My and your contributor Joey, Thank you

and thanks to you for listening stuff. Never told you
this prediction of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from My Heart Radio,
you can check out the Art Radio app, Apple podcast,
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.

Stuff Mom Never Told You News

Advertise With Us

Follow Us On

Hosts And Creators

Anney Reese

Anney Reese

Samantha McVey

Samantha McVey

Show Links


Popular Podcasts

Who Killed JFK?

Who Killed JFK?

Who Killed JFK? For 60 years, we are still asking that question. In commemoration of the 60th anniversary of President John F. Kennedy's tragic assassination, legendary filmmaker Rob Reiner teams up with award-winning journalist Soledad O’Brien to tell the history of America’s greatest murder mystery. They interview CIA officials, medical experts, Pulitzer-prize winning journalists, eyewitnesses and a former Secret Service agent who, in 2023, came forward with groundbreaking new evidence. They dig deep into the layers of the 60-year-old question ‘Who Killed JFK?’, how that question has shaped America, and why it matters that we’re still asking it today.

Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang

Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang

Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.

Music, radio and podcasts, all free. Listen online or download the iHeart App.


© 2024 iHeartMedia, Inc.