November 30, 2024 • 42 mins
Introducing “Thelma and Louise”. Divorcee besties and I Do, Part 2 “experts” wanted a chance to share their thoughts.
They are in the midst of their search for Mr. Right, again.
They have practical advice because they are in it with you.
Ready to find love again? Want dating advice?
Email us at: IDOPOD@iheartradio.com or call us at 844-4-I Do Pod (844-443-6763)
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
Hi, everyone, This is Thelma and Louise. Well actually that's
not really our names, but some purposes of this. It's
going to be that way until we get comfortable with
this concept. And since it's been about nine years that
Thelma and I have been trying to navigate the dating
world and haven't successfully got ourselves into a final destination
(00:34):
chapter two relationship, we are hesitant to give our real names.
But maybe one day we will be comfortable to give
our real names. Anyways, here we are bestie since college.
Did not think that we would end up where we are,
which is divorced. But we've made lemonade out of lemons
and we are boots on the ground, normal people, not
(00:57):
celebrities in our fifties children kids in college like ready
to kind of focus on our chapter two. We spend
a lot of time actually dating. We do the date prep,
we do the post mortem, and we are happy to
be an open book and answer any and all questions
(01:19):
because we are all in this together, ladies, and we
all have a single goal of finding our unicorn. So Thelma,
we thought it would be interesting if we were to
talk to our friends out there and just talk about
the concept of a first date, Right, Like, let's assume
we've met somebody out or we've you know, gone on
the dating app, and we have secured a first date,
(01:41):
and you and I have a lot of kind of
thoughts and opinions on outfits and how we should be
treated and expectations and all that, so let's just start
with the concept of a first date.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Well, that's probably a good question for me because I
feel like Louise has a lot more experience with first
date than I do, so I'm still kind of getting
the hang of it. But I ironically have two dates
this week, so I can really talk in their first dates,
so I feel like I can really speak to this.
I think starting kind of it's step one is the
(02:16):
date outfit. And I don't know about you all out there,
but if I we have a uniform, well I think
it is it's getting a uniform so that when you
get asked out on a date, you know what is
your go to that makes you feel confident and good
about yourself. And also it's not that it's an hour
(02:36):
before the date and you have closed all over your
closet floor, you're freaking out, You're tempted to cancel and
thinking this is not happening. Because if that's me and
I'm not prepared and don't feel good, I either show
up and I'm ready to polish off ten cocktails because
I'm such a stress case, or I kind of want
to can the whole thing. So I feel like we've
(02:57):
really spent a lot of time to kind of figure
out what is our signature look and like coming up
with a couple outfits that really work for us.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
I think what's important about the first date outfit is
what message are you trying to give off about who
you are?
Speaker 2 (03:12):
Right?
Speaker 1 (03:13):
So for example, you know, are we going to go
in and are we going to wear, you know, at
age fifty, like a camusol and nothing over our shoulders
and just kind of say like hey, hey, like lucky
you there could be action today, Or are we going
to wear an elegant blouse, Like what imageer we try
to put forward that represents best who we are to
give that first date person a sense. So I know
(03:34):
you and I spend a lot of time on you know,
if we're going to wear, for example, a blouse and
maybe we'll wear a more fitted bottom, or if we're
going to wear a camsol, then we're going to wear
like a leather jacket over our shoulders. So we're trying
to do like a chic but sexy but elegant, you know,
kind of age appropriate outfit.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
And if we feel good in it, then that's all
that really matters to us. I also think that, like
for me, venues kind of because I know that a
lot of people probably have their ideal for a date,
but for me, it's it's short and sweet. And I
can speak to that because I've made this mistake. Now,
Like how many times, Louise, have I called you and said,
(04:14):
oh my god, like, what is wrong? I just got
suckered into four hours?
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Well, last week you were on a date. It was
a first date, and it was like four hours. I
couldn't get you on the phone, and I was like,
either you're chopped up. I was got married and just
eloped and didn't want your best friend to come. So
I think you're right. I think the first date really
should be capped at an hour, leave them wanting more,
don't exhaust everything that we're talking about, right, Like, it
(04:39):
should be short and sweet and just enough to give
kind of a sense of like, hey, do I want
to go out with this person again, and if.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
You're anything like me, like set that up ahead of time,
because I always get suckered into the two nice syndrome
where it's like, if it's not terrible, I mean I
can talk to a wall, you can talk to a wall.
I can make any date appear good, but we all
know if you're feeling it or not. And I think
for me, it's like I sit down in the conversation
(05:06):
flows and then sometimes I feel guilty. And I also
think sometimes I'm so I don't know if it's my
ego or what it is, but sometimes I'm so fixated
on like wanting it to be a successful first date,
that I get caught up in that as opposed to like,
what do I feel? Do I want to end this date?
Is this a good use of my Thursday night? Or
(05:27):
would I rather be at home on my couch or
talking to my kids.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
I used to do that. I used to look at
every first date as an audition because rejection was so
hard for me that I would sit there and want
to try to sign the date just to make sure
that I was going to get the call back the
next day, and then I would decide if I wanted
to go out with them? And recently I kind of
switched my focus to your point of like, wait, does
this person align with me? Am I interested? Do I
(05:55):
want to go out them again?
Speaker 3 (05:56):
Like?
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Are we kind of on the same page? And so
I made it less about advice gets the callback and
more about like, do I want to go out with
this person again? Is this somebody that I want to,
you know, spend an hour quite frankly away from you, laughing,
eating goof kitchen and sweats and putting the effort into
getting dressed and putting makeup on and sitting there and
going on a date. So I totally agree with you.
(06:20):
You know, it's interesting going back to the concept of
a first date. I am one who does not and
I know you feel the same way. We do not
do video chats, Like I think there's something that gets
lost in translation. I mean, that's part of the problem
with this whole swipe mentality is it's all based on physicality,
like swipe, swipe, swipe, sipe. Who's really reading the description?
And I think so much has to do with like
(06:42):
an energy and an aura and like almost like an
ingredients of connection between two people on a date. So
I actually don't do video chat first dates, But.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Do you insist on calling them or I mean or
having a conversation.
Speaker 1 (06:55):
Always have a phone call, So try to pivot pretty
quickly from a text to all unless it's a setup.
If it's a setup, to be honest with you, and
the person has been vetted from somebody in my life,
like I'm good just to have the kind of text
to make the date arrangement and then meet them in
person for the first time. If it's an app then
I think a phone call is super super important. But
(07:18):
I I definitely like to meet in person for the
first time. And I'm one who prefers a glass of
wine and not a hike for a coffee date. I
think it's a personal preference of where somebody feels their
most most comfortable. Some people want to, you know, wear
leggings and be like this is me, you know, love
me for who I am, instead of done up with
(07:38):
like the glamor. I like the idea of, you know,
putting myself together and showing up and sitting in a
place where there's a vibe and an atmosphere to kind
of help kind of fuel the energy a little bit.
And I'm always better on a goss of wine. Anyways,
I am too.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
But did I tell you when I asked on my
date this guy, I said, so, what makes you choose
a coffee date of our cocktail date? And his answer, yes,
this was his answer. He's like, I do it when
I'm not really sure of the pictures and if the
girl is going to be truly how she's represented online,
So I do it so that I can be sober
and really check her out.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
Interesting. I mean, look, there's a lot of people that
have been at this game for a long time, and
everybody kind of has their greatest hits playlist of what
works for them or what is their their comfort level,
and you know, it's almost indicative of like people connecting
or not, Like does is our chemistry compass lined up?
(08:38):
Or do our i hate to say, childhood wounds line up?
Or our baggage. It's interesting, it's a fascinating it's a
fascinating game, and I've learned to love the idea of
first dates.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
Let's talk about dating apps, because aren't ninety nine of
us kind of forced or subjected to that's what we
need to do to meet people. I mean, these days, Louise,
do agree.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
It's hard because I've I've been on apps briefly and
it made me uncomfortable and I prefer setups, but setups
are fewer and far between. So I kind of look
at all of it and I'm always just open to
a first date, like if somebody wants to set me up,
or if there's somebody interesting enough on an app. Like
my time is just not that valuable in that I
(09:22):
can spare an hour to meet somebody. And I think
that people come into our lives because they're supposed to, right.
I don't believe in random encounters. I think whether somebody
is supposed to be a lesson or a blessing, or
it's somebody that can be you know, kind of punted
to somebody else, right Like I remember I was once
having this conversation like one woman's trash could be another
(09:44):
woman's treasure, right. Like, So I'm always open to everything.
And you know, I have a lot of friends who
spend a lot of time and they want to like
Google and they want to know like where do they live,
and what do they do, what's their job and this
and that. It's like I don't even do the I'm
going to be in a safe space, public space, like
I'm okay, Like I'm not going to Google, I'm not
(10:04):
going to get preconceived motions. I go in now, super
super open, and I think it's like kind of what
works for you and the way that we can increase
our numbers and of a dating app, which really, if
you think about it, it's like the days of standing
in a Starbucks line or you know what, guy approaches
(10:24):
a table of five girls eating dinner. It's so rare.
We'd be better off sitting at a bar by ourselves,
which is kind of scary and I don't know, makes
me feel super insecure. But a guy will talk to
a girl sitting at a bar by herself, or maybe
if you and I are like, look what happened last
Oh god, what happened last week? Was that crazy?
Speaker 2 (10:43):
Oh my god? Oh my god? That was that was
creat You.
Speaker 1 (10:46):
Have to tell the story because it talks about how
we put our put ourselves together and the energy we
give off.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
Okay, well, so Louise and I are at a bar
and we're sitting there in our slash bar. Yeah yeah,
and I I always and bibe a little more than
she does, so I'm always on my second glass of
wine while she's still nursing her first I'm very measured,
so anyway, so I had ordered the second glass and
there was a guy sitting next to Louise, and I
(11:16):
guess he noticed that her glass was empty as I'm
like halfway through with my second, and so he all
of a sudden, glass of red wine shows up, and
you know your glass was empty, clearly mine wasn't. And
so we start striking up a conversation with him, and
he was nice, but he was definitely older. He didn't
(11:37):
look older. I think he actually looked great for his age.
That's like the nice compliment I have here is that
he looked great for his age. But it did proceed
to get a little sketchy. But like we're gluttons for punishment,
so we just kept on the conversation going.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
But we also felt bad, like he bought a drink
for us. He was right next to us. We hadn't
even gotten our food, so we were not going anywhere.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Oh god, okay, I'm interrupting you. So that's a total topic.
Where you and I think I think we disagree on
is that I feel so uncomfortable when somebody has bought
me dinner or a drink. And that's often why I
have a hard time getting up during a date, because
I somehow feel like I owe them something. Do you
feel that way?
Speaker 1 (12:17):
Well, that was a different situation. We were still sitting
there and he had just sent a drink and he
was like, next us. You know what I'm saying. So
I feel like again, I mean, this is let me
just put this bluntly. I had a friend who's dating
a guy this was awful, and he paid for her
to get her boobs done and some other work done,
and then she calls me up two weeks post surgery.
(12:38):
She's like, yeah, I'm gonna break up with them. I go, what,
you can't do that? Like he bought you boobs, Like
he's got it. You can't just be so obvious, right,
So it's like I think those are extreme cases. But again,
like if I in my own head have carved out
that we're gonna have a drink for an hour and
I have said I have a dinner I'm going to,
(12:58):
then I'm okay with them buying me a drink. I
mean you and I look at that a little bit
differently now if it's flowing like I was on a
date last week and it was a drink date, and
it was a setup and we had agreed it was
going to be an hour, and all of a sudden,
like we're getting at the forty five minute mark, he's like, oh,
by the way, I have another hour. And I was like,
(13:19):
and I remember in my head thinking, okay, like I
do like him, I'm enjoying him, but I don't want
to be too available. So I was like, okay, I
have about twenty more minutes. Remember, because you and I
met after for dinner. Yeah, and he bought my glass
of wine and you know, he said do you want
an appetizer? Which I thought was super classy, but that
(13:40):
was based on the flow of that. It was clear
that we were having a good time and connecting.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
What do you feel if somebody has anyone ever asked
you to split the bill or like, what's your take
when people do that on a day?
Speaker 1 (14:02):
Look, I know this is not the popular, you know,
kind of climate right now, but I don't think chivalry
is dead. And for me, I'm raising two sons and
I have taught them to be chivalrous and respectful of women,
and it's really important to me, you know, I'm never
going to be the girl who orders you know, the
crazy steak or you know, the expensive thing on the menu.
(14:24):
But if somebody's asked me out, I really appreciate when
they pay for my pay for my wine.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
I mean, I totally agree to chivalry is not dead.
I feel like I often like do the pull out
the credit card or offer just so that I know
that you know what I mean, that I'm making the effort.
But between you and me, if then they take me
up on it, I do, I'm kind of like, oh,
like that's not really Like are you really a gentleman?
And I'm not saying that if you go on multiple
(14:54):
dates with somebody that you don't want to start or
that I think while you're.
Speaker 1 (14:58):
Dating somebody, sure always pay for meals or whatever at.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
The beginning beginning. I think it's nice and it does
mean yeah, I agree, and I'm not worrying alone.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
You know, one of the things, you know, you and
I speak a lot about, and you know, I think
sometimes I ask simply too many questions to deflect the
attention off of me, and I get scared of silence
at a table because I don't like bad flow. So
I'm always trying to think, and one of the things
I love to do is ask open ended questions because
you can learn a lot about somebody by the questions
(15:31):
you ask. I mean super basic questions like where do
you see yourself in five years? And what if they
were to say like dating lots of people and then
you're sitting there and you're saying yourself, Okay, this guy's
a player, Like he's not looking for a life partner,
he's not looking for long a long term relationship. So
I think that you know, it's always good to go
(15:51):
on a date and have your kind of catchphrase questions
that will help you pretty quickly size up who they
are and you know what their core value system is, right,
because ultimately we're trying to chemistry is important, but it's
really important to say, like, find somebody whose core value
systems kind of line up with ours.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
So question for you when you go out on a
first date with somebody, do you feel like when you
sit down and kind of you probably had a conversation
or two write potentially with them, but when you sit down,
do you feel like within the first five minutes, like,
what is louder to you the chemistry that you're feeling
or lack thereof, or the questions that you're asking them
(16:34):
and their answers like this is so hard.
Speaker 1 (16:37):
I mean, I grapple with this all the time because
of course we all want that dopamine hit and that
like instant, like you know what we see in the movies, right,
And I think that I again, like, well, I've read
a lot of books because I'm trying to understand like
who am I, what am I looking for? And what
makes the most sense for quite frankly, why do my
marriage fail? And why have you know, these relationships that
(16:59):
I in the last nine years, why haven't they stuck
or why didn't it go the distance? Like they have
felt like bridges to me? And what I've learned is
is one thing I used to sit on a date
and be like, is this my guy? Am I going
to marry him? Or are we going to ride out
from too the sense I don't do that anymore. I
sit on my first date and I say, is this
person interesting enough? Would I go out and have a
(17:20):
second date with him? And then on the second date
would I go out with them on a third date?
And what that has helped me do is learn to
build a little bit more of a foundation and focus
less on the butterflies, because butterflies are really kind of
like a trigger of something that's potentially familiar in a
way that's triggering to what is your baggage? Right? And
(17:45):
I think you have to have some degree of attraction
for sure, But I think there is so much more
that is important. And I think attraction you have to
have some like I don't think it just can I
think it can improve. I think it can grow, but
you have to have some degree of attraction when you're
sitting there. But I think it's like an entire almost pizza, right,
(18:09):
there's like equal slices, a really important thing. So I
think it's a combination of core values, chemistry, communication, connection,
like are you living the same life?
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Like?
Speaker 1 (18:20):
You know? What I've learned in my dating is I
don't want to be a somebody who's not a parent.
I don't want to be somebody's never been married. It
doesn't work for me. We don't speak the same language.
Some people might not care. They might not look at
it like, oh there's no kids, great, there's more time
for them to focus on me and work around my schedule.
What about you? What do you think how important chemistry
on the first date for you, well.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
I think chemistry is important. Like if I'm absolutely not
attracted to somebody, you know, it doesn't matter, that's not
going to change. Although I think people can become more attractive,
you know, the more you learn about someone.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
And their energy.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
No, and I completely agree with that, and we've talked
about this. I think question we ask ourselves is how
long do you stay in a relationship or how many
dates do you go on before you ultimately either call
it and decide do I want? Is this how I
want to be spending my time? And I think I
(19:17):
feel like both of us are pretty lucky. You know,
no one wants to be post divorced, but often post
divorce I feel like means you're a little bit older
and hopefully a little bit wiser. But we have pretty
good lives, right, I Mean, the reality is we have
such good girlfriends, we love being with our kids, and
(19:37):
it takes a lot for me to decide do I
want to break away from all those things to go
out on a date. But I think a lot of
the dates that we've gone on, or relationships that I
won't speak for you, but for me, relationships that I've
had we talk back to what you refer to as
the bridge. And sometimes you get out of a relationship
and it's super devastating or sad. You kind of wonder
(20:00):
how you're going to push forward. And sometimes the next
guy that comes along is totally different, but he helps
you kind of look at your life through a different
lens and move on so and gives you that restart
right for potentially the next guy. I don't know if
that makes sense. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1 (20:18):
I think for me a lot of times what happens
is is I'll be dating or eye that on paper
is a ten right, like everything I want, you know,
and so I keep going to keep hoping that it's
going to, you know, kind of go to the next
level or I'm going to I remember once I was
dating this guy and he was everything I wanted and
(20:40):
I just wasn't feeling it, but I wanted it so
bad and I kept trying, and I I remember going
to a psychic plus saying can't you do something? Can't
you do some waving around? So I like wake up
and I'm like hit by a lightning bolt and I'm
in love.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
So I just want to know is this my guy?
Like when I talk to the psychic, I'm more like
when am I going to meet the guy? Or is
this the guy?
Speaker 3 (21:04):
Right?
Speaker 1 (21:04):
And the thing about a psychic is what it does
is it helps kind of put in your head so
then you're manifesting and you're looking, and you're this, and
you're I mean, we've all played that game because we
want to believe that the right person is coming. But
I think what I've learned is is, you know, there
is value in every date, every experience, and it's all
(21:26):
kind of building up and what right What might have
been right for me when I was in my twenties
looking for my husband is not right for potentially what
is for me right now? You know what I'm saying.
But let's go back so again, as you know, like
I'm I'm a little more difficult when it comes to
certain things on dates, right, like do they walk me
to my car?
Speaker 2 (21:47):
Like?
Speaker 1 (21:47):
Different things? How do you feel when you make a
date and somebody has to reschedule? Like how does that feel?
Unless if it's like a weird almost like a weird excuse.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Well, it's a good question. I have a first story,
I mean a first tan story I can share with you,
which I think you may have heard before, but I
feel like I have kids, I have a busy life,
and so I think at this age, if somebody needs
to reschedule and is polite about it and gives you,
you know, enough notice, it doesn't have to be crazy notice.
(22:21):
But the night before then it is what it is.
I mean, maybe I'm disappointed, but the truth is, like
I don't want to be I wouldn't want to be
with somebody that was so rigid and unforgiving in a relationship,
so I would kind of want to treat them the
same way. What did they do it a second time? Okay,
well so this wasn't a second time. But do you
(22:43):
remember that I had a date and it was I mean,
I thought, I know it was like objectively, I think
I had a great date with somebody and we went out.
He was a little bit farther away, so he was
like an hour and a half away from where I lived.
So it was always hard for us to schedule dates.
But maybe we'd had a couple dates and we had
(23:05):
a really great date on like a Friday night, and
this was at a time where he was really busy
and I was. My schedule was crazy for like weeks
on end. But this date was so good, and we
both at the date, we're like, oh my gosh, we
totally want to see each other again. Can we figure
out something?
Speaker 1 (23:22):
Well, distance makes it so challenging.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
Also, that's a totally other subject because I think a
plane ride is actually easier than like an hour drive.
But that's me. But anyway, so Monday, so Sunday we
checked in with each other. We're like, okay, looking forward
to tomorrow. And I had.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
Told and that was on the heels of your first kiss, by.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
The way, and I had revamped my whole day on
Monday to accommodate a lunch date, which was like, candidly
really inconvenient, but it's like, okay, we're both in it,
and all of a sudden, Sunday he was great. Monday morning,
I hadn't heard from him by like ten o'clock, and
I was like, hey, just checking in to see, like
are we meeting halfway? What are we doing? And he's like,
(24:01):
I'm so sorry. I just found out that I have
to you know, I can't pick my I have to
pick up my daughter. I have to do something I
can't remember. He's like, I can't really make lunch and
here's the deal, Like everybody has things with their kids.
I do understand that, but he had said I thought
I could swing it, but I was having a trouble
having her time last night figuring it out. And again
(24:23):
things happen, but I did.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
But you were bothered because you reached out to him.
Speaker 2 (24:27):
Well, And I was also bothered that, like if he
thought it was going to be a problem the night before,
like I understand, just say to me, Hey, I'm kind
of having a hiccup here, I don't know if this
is going to happen. But instead he kind of waited
until the eleventh hour and then he canceled, and I
remember calling you, remember, and I was so annoyed because
I literally rescheduled like three other things, and I was like,
(24:48):
I'm going to tell him that's it. And I was
going to be actually super strong and rude, and you
even helped me tone it down. Remember I texted him
and I was like, hey, it was.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
A sharp you had a sharp tongue on that one.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
Yeah. I was like, things come up for everybody, but
in the future, like if you could, if you could
have just reached out the night before, I would have appreciated.
I you know, I rescheduled my day and he said
something and I just like gave him the thumbs up.
Do you remember that?
Speaker 1 (25:12):
He was like, oh, why, well that nothing like the
thumbs up that is the biggest Like.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Like, yeah, I gave him the thumbs up, which is
all I really needed to say. And then he never
called me again, So yeah he did.
Speaker 1 (25:23):
That's okay because next but but again, he was somebody
you met on a dating app, and it goes to
show you that there are some good people on there.
But what I've learned is whether it's a set up
or a dating app, where there's a will, there's a way, right,
Like the truth of the matter is this is where
(25:44):
he went wrong. Was he didn't get ahead of it
and call you'd be like, hey, I really want to
do this, like we did have such a great date,
like I want to throw out another day. That kind
of it kind of went off into the distance. So
that felt bad, and I don't know, it just lost
its team.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
But here's the deal. I know our date was good,
and nothing happened between our date and me.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
Basically what's happened. But regardless of.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
What happened, I also think that the biggest thing that
I've learned is like I spoke my truth. I said
what I felt. If that was not what he wanted
to hear, well, then he's not my guy. And so
I really feel like I'm pretty good at this point
to understand that, like if things aren't working out or
I'm not connecting with somebody, then like just move on.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
That's the difference between dating now, you know, kind of
post divorced with kids and versus like when we're just
starting out. And I think that you know, when you're
in our stage of our lives and we're looking for
a chapter two, like it has to be totally additive, right,
Like we're busy, we have children, we have jobs, we
have family, we have friends. We're quite content to stay
(27:03):
home and read a book, right and just like FaceTime
with you.
Speaker 2 (27:06):
And I'm not looking for somebody to give me kids
or a white picket fence like And I think it's
also like shifting your perspective to find gratitude in that
instead of desperation. You know what I'm saying, Because I
think the greatest thing about not being twenty five and
wondering like am I gonna have a child? And I
don't want to say anything if people do or don't.
(27:27):
You know, there are many people probably still wanting to
have children, but like, I feel like I've already had
a really full life and so I'm happy with my
life and if somebody comes along to compliment it, then great,
but if not, like that's okay too.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
And we've always talked about being golden girls and all
of us living together and in our kind of you know,
seventy year old sorority house with like all of our
fun friends and living and watch you know, we watch
Bellow's Place back then. Who knows what we'll be watching
in ten years from now.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
And let's be honest, like, sometimes it's more fun. And
I think that that brings up the comsation about dating
and how about putting yourself out there because I feel
like you it's so funny. Okay, you're kind of upset.
You're more obsessed with my dating life than I think
I am. If we're being.
Speaker 1 (28:14):
Oh well, let's talk about so what have I done?
Speaker 2 (28:17):
I mean, okay, well, here's the deal. In fairness, you
are from here, so you get set up all the time. Okay,
you're always getting set up with people. I am not
from here. I moved here. I really have. I have friends,
but like they're gay or they're my girlfriends. So it's
not like I have a ton of opportunities. I mean
maybe that's an excuse, but like a ton of opportunities
(28:37):
to get set up. So you have really been pushing me,
and I love how you always say to me there's
no excuse, there's no excuse for you not going.
Speaker 1 (28:44):
It doesn't just drop out of sky.
Speaker 3 (28:46):
I get it.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
But you've been saying to me like you need to
go on a day a week, A day a week.
I'm like, where do you think I am going to
procure a day to week? Like, I mean, am I
asking out the guy? Journy mean at the grocery store?
I mean, who am I asking out? So I feel
like you've been really pushing me on that, which brings
up the conversation of online dating. And so finally when
I said to you, there's no way and how that
(29:08):
I'm going to be able to get a guy a
week to go out on a date with, let alone,
do I want to go out in a day week?
But I did humor you and say fine, So we
did start online dating, and I don't.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
Know if we should you do let's repeat the week. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:22):
I don't really feel like this is cat fishing because
it's kind of like, actually, I think it's in everyone's
best interest. But here is here's how we kind of
have made it work for us.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
Right.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
I feel like online dating is a total drag, and
I feel like people get or at least the reason
I don't like it is.
Speaker 1 (29:41):
Told change the lens and look at it as an
opportunity to cast the net win.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
I got it in the short term, like it's exhausting, right, Like,
when I get home, I want to do five million
other things than sit in swape. And I told you that.
And so here was the compromise, right that we came
up with. So he came over to my house. When
was it was it election night? When was I don't
even know when it was. You came over to my house.
We watched TV.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
Now I had already started swiping election night. It was
a few days prior.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
Okay, So we we mutually approved my pictures. We mutually wrote.
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Well, let's talk about the profile for one minute, okay.
So I feel profiles need to be unique. It needs
to It's kind of like a kid's essay to call,
you know, application of college, Like we're all a diamond dozen.
We like yoga, we like to go out to dinner,
we like to travel. Like, how are we going to
(30:37):
set you apart so that when somebody is you know,
looking at the pictures and then reading the three sentences? Basically,
how are we going to make you memorable?
Speaker 2 (30:46):
Oh and and let me say the first pass that
I took at it, it said what is your dream Sunday?
And I can't remember exactly what I said, but I
said it was boring, something like wake up, go to
the gym.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
It was so it was so unmemorable.
Speaker 2 (31:02):
And then and then I was like, you know, maybe
meet friends for brunch, then do some errands, like make
my list for the next week, like for the next
week so I'm prepared for the week ahead, and rent
watch a movie and go to bend.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
I was boring, so I rewrote it.
Speaker 2 (31:18):
Boring It's my dream Sunday, like I was authentic.
Speaker 1 (31:22):
I get it. But I changed it up a little
bit and I rewrote it, and uh, we're we are
dating together as we know, So basically, listeners, I am
doing the online dating for Thelma and what happens is
is I do the swiping, and then once we are
(31:43):
quot a match, then we do some texting and then
I give her phone number out and then I call
her and I say, expect a phone call from this guy.
Let me know how your first day goes. And it's
actually been working. We've met really nice people so far.
It hasn't been your person, but we are able to
the one day to week. You've had a few breakup
texts which we've worked on, which we've been fine.
Speaker 2 (32:05):
We should talk about that after the break How do
you do the breakup text but.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Be super transparent?
Speaker 2 (32:09):
It's been actually really it's because here's the fun we're
doing it. Everything is more fun together, so I feel
like it's not as painful to do it with a friend.
I also think you could say it's misleading, but heresto,
I think it only works because you and I have
very we're both pretty one day, we could show up
on the date together, yeah, and we do laugh. Remember
(32:30):
I was like, what are we going to do if
you totally fall in love with somebody? And then we
were like, maybe we just both show up together and
kind of it's a TV show then yeah, So anyway,
it works because we kind of have the same personality
in certain ways. We also know each other so well,
so she can answer all of these things. But we
have had some funny texts, like like she drinks coffee.
(32:50):
I don't drink coffee, and I think if she says
to one more guy, oh, I'm just sitting having coffee
because I have been asked out on a lot of
coffee dates and I'm like, okay, uh got to stop
with the coffee because everybody's inviting me out to coffee
and I don't drink coffee. So We've had a few
funny things, and I definitely have to always look back
at the profile to be like, Okay, what have we
(33:11):
talked about?
Speaker 1 (33:11):
I told her to put into her contacts on her phone,
like the person's name and like a little bumble bee.
Speaker 2 (33:17):
Oh, I've got like fifty five bumblebees. And I'm basically
like a hostess at a restaurant, you know, who always
has to write down like large dark haired man glasses.
Do you know what I mean? With three kids in toe,
I mean I basically have a note section on my
phone so that when I get the call, it is
hard between the spam calls that you get the random
(33:37):
now numbers before I actually have entered it into my thing.
It's like I never pick up my phone blindly. Like ever,
let's talk about though, their profile pictures.
Speaker 1 (33:49):
The popcorn ceilings, the tank tops, the muscles.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
So like there's some things that are just obvious nos, right,
But like, what do you think about when I mean,
because we both have kids, what do you think about
when a profile has uh, when they have pictures their
kids and their pictures.
Speaker 1 (34:07):
Well, look, it's again for me, it's important that whoever
I date has had children, because I have data people
that don't have kids. So I don't think every picture
should have kids in it. But I to see a
picture of them like skiing with their kids, which shows
me they're a good dad, and they're connected and they're
doing activities and he has kids. One picture like that,
I like that. Actually, something like that I would be
(34:29):
more apt to swipe right than not right, because if
I see a picture of just somebody, just his picture
of his face or selfies, and I can't tell like
who is you like, show me what you're interested in,
show me a part of your life. Then you know
it's easier for me and you get to sensitize. I
mean it's like your finger just goes to the left,
the left, the left is exhausting, then your eyes begin
(34:49):
to dilate.
Speaker 2 (34:50):
Yeah, I mean, if you see like six pictures of
a loner in a bathroom taking selfies with like those
awful fluorescensesn't align with.
Speaker 1 (34:59):
What we're looking for or or the kind of person
that we want.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
I got it. But we might have to have a
little talk after this, because I will tell you the
kids thing. I mean, I'm never gonna put pictures of
my kids online, especially initially, but I also I do
appreciate if they want to put pictures of their kids,
but for me being in my fifties with older kids,
like if I see an infant or a toddler in
(35:22):
a picture, it's like, yeah, it's like I don't walk
because I mean not that I don't love kids, but
like I love my kids. But I'm not done that. Yeah,
and I'm not looking. I'm not going back to I
can't talk about how many people, how many people before
we've even gone on a date. If one more guy
who I literally have had one phone call with or
(35:43):
one text with sends me pictures with his children before
I've even met him. It's like, where do they think
that this is hot? It's just it's so not And
I don't know if they think that women think it's
endearing that they have children. I'm like, I know you
have kids, but I don't even know you. So one,
don't try to pimp out your kids to me. And two,
I'm not like, I don't want to play mom. I
just want to date you.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
But also we're not interested in meeting somebody's kids right away,
Like I have really strong I totally do. I've been
you know, divorced for nine years and I've dated a lot,
and my kids have met one person, and I you know,
we've been dating, and I figured, you know, at this point,
you know, my kids, I think really want me to
find a good person. So I thought it was stored
(36:24):
that you're home alone with important that well, I'm on
three sixty still, so they see them out all the time,
but that they that So I introduced them to somebody,
as you know, and you know, they didn't really like him.
And quite frankly, I've learned that none of my friends
don't even liked him. So what do we do if
your kids and your friends disapprove with somebody that you're enjoying.
(36:44):
But I usually now, because that thing went up in flames,
I think it's good that my kids met somebody at
six months. It was not like a month. I think
it's very strange when somebody wants you to meet their
kids within a month, as if they're trying to slot
in a new mommy or something. But I did six months,
and you know, I thought that was appropriate because we
are clearly exclusive. But now I'm going to think twice
(37:07):
because you know, at this point, like my kids aren't
even home. I mean, they're in college, They're on to
their next their next chapter. So I'm not rushing it
anytime soon. I wanted the next person that my kids
meet because this thing did not go well, it's going
to be somebody I pretty much know I'm going to
end up with. Like I love being by children. I
don't need a Brady budget, right, Like, I don't need
(37:27):
to have this guy my kids all the time on
the you know, rare nights that I even have them
home anymore. So it's going to be even further apart
when I do that.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
I think, in my mind, well, my ex husband I
both said like six months, and I think he waited
three years when he was with somebody, so like he
was super respectful, and I think for me, I feel
like six months is kind of the minimum for me.
But more so it's I won't introduce anyone to my
(37:57):
kids unless I see a potential future with them, because
I just don't think it's worth it. Ay, it's kind
of my private life, and I don't know if I
don't ever think it's going to actually impact them, then, Like,
there are a lot of days I don't have my children,
so I don't need to introduce somebody to my kids,
you know. I also think sometimes they are wondering what
you're doing. So if it starts to be this one
(38:19):
thing where you're with somebody all the time, I definitely
like familiarize them with the idea.
Speaker 1 (38:24):
I tell my kids when I'm dating somebody. But I
say them, I'm not going to sit you down at
a table with them until I know that this is
going to go, you know, the distance or somewhat of
a distance. Like, but I do tell my kids what
I'm doing, like I AlwaysOn.
Speaker 2 (38:38):
I said to my last boyfriend six months, and then
six months came. It passed then it like eight months,
ten months, and then he started being like, this is
really weird. I want to meet your children, And I think.
Speaker 1 (38:51):
That was kind of addicative of what I know.
Speaker 2 (38:53):
But I finally after a year, did it. But it
was also because it was long distance, and I feel
like we always met, you know, so my kids were
going to be there, we were going to have to
sleep in the same house with this person. And I'm
just super private about that with my kids, Like your
kids don't want to envision you actually having a romantic life,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (39:12):
It's just I mean, you know, it's amazing some there
are This topic is endless. I mean, we could do
nine thousand questions and like go on and on because
we have so much experience. And I think what I
find we're spreshing about always talking to you is a
we're not we're not in this alone and it's ever changing,
and you know, I don't know, like it's just such
(39:35):
a connecting with people and meeting people and will life
is right. It's relationships, it's friendships, it's you know, relationships,
it's dates, it's relationships with our children or whatever it is.
But I don't know, I feel like I love talking
to you, and I feel like, you know, always up
to answer people's questions or have these like kind of
you know girls, girls chats about dating and navigating dating,
(39:59):
and I don't know, like I'm I'm glad we're in
this together, and I do love that I we're dating
literally together. I appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
And I mean basically, when or if I finally ever
do get a boyfriend off of our online dating experience,
I feel like, oh, I'm speaking at the wedding. I know, well, no,
we're walking down the aisle together, aren't we? Oh?
Speaker 1 (40:19):
Yes? Oh yes? So anything else left to say? And
we'll come back another time and ask a million other
things like asking a on a first date for a
second date. Is that a red flag? Or all of
that stuff? Or do you text the next day to
say thank you? I don't all those different things. It's
you know, dating at twenty, dating at fifty. It's it's
(40:40):
still dating, right, and everybody wants to love and be
loved and find a person.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
I don't know. You might be my person, you might
be my personally by way.
Speaker 1 (40:49):
I'd be okay with that. Like you know me, There's
been many times that I've been dating somebody where When
you call to say what are you doing that? I
wish I could, you know, cancel my date and go
out to dinner with you, even if it's just sitting
at home and watching TikTok and ordering good kitchen.
Speaker 2 (41:02):
Totally agree, So let's plan our date for tonight.
Speaker 1 (41:05):
Okay, what are you gonna where? Thank you? Say bye.
Speaker 3 (41:11):
Hey, It's Jenny Garth. Thanks Thelma and Louise for that
fun takeover. If you are a single and want dating advice,
or if you're ready to find love again, we want
to get to know you. Call us. The number is
one eight four four four I Do Pod. That's one
(41:31):
eight four four four four three six seven sixty three
or email us at ID pod at iHeartRadio dot com,
follow us on Instagram and TikTok at I Do Part
two pod. All of this information will be in the
show notes. Make sure to rate and review the podcast
I Do Part two and iHeartRadio podcast where falling in
(41:53):
love is the main objective.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
On three
Hi, everyone, This is Thelma and Louise. Well actually that's
not really our names, but some purposes of this. It's
going to be that way until we get comfortable with
this concept. And since it's been about nine years that
Thelma and I have been trying to navigate the dating
world and haven't successfully got ourselves into a final destination
(00:34):
chapter two relationship, we are hesitant to give our real names.
But maybe one day we will be comfortable to give
our real names. Anyways, here we are bestie since college.
Did not think that we would end up where we are,
which is divorced. But we've made lemonade out of lemons
and we are boots on the ground, normal people, not
(00:57):
celebrities in our fifties children kids in college like ready
to kind of focus on our chapter two. We spend
a lot of time actually dating. We do the date prep,
we do the post mortem, and we are happy to
be an open book and answer any and all questions
(01:19):
because we are all in this together, ladies, and we
all have a single goal of finding our unicorn. So Thelma,
we thought it would be interesting if we were to
talk to our friends out there and just talk about
the concept of a first date, Right, Like, let's assume
we've met somebody out or we've you know, gone on
the dating app, and we have secured a first date,
(01:41):
and you and I have a lot of kind of
thoughts and opinions on outfits and how we should be
treated and expectations and all that, so let's just start
with the concept of a first date.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Well, that's probably a good question for me because I
feel like Louise has a lot more experience with first
date than I do, so I'm still kind of getting
the hang of it. But I ironically have two dates
this week, so I can really talk in their first dates,
so I feel like I can really speak to this.
I think starting kind of it's step one is the
(02:16):
date outfit. And I don't know about you all out there,
but if I we have a uniform, well I think
it is it's getting a uniform so that when you
get asked out on a date, you know what is
your go to that makes you feel confident and good
about yourself. And also it's not that it's an hour
(02:36):
before the date and you have closed all over your
closet floor, you're freaking out, You're tempted to cancel and
thinking this is not happening. Because if that's me and
I'm not prepared and don't feel good, I either show
up and I'm ready to polish off ten cocktails because
I'm such a stress case, or I kind of want
to can the whole thing. So I feel like we've
(02:57):
really spent a lot of time to kind of figure
out what is our signature look and like coming up
with a couple outfits that really work for us.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
I think what's important about the first date outfit is
what message are you trying to give off about who
you are?
Speaker 2 (03:12):
Right?
Speaker 1 (03:13):
So for example, you know, are we going to go
in and are we going to wear, you know, at
age fifty, like a camusol and nothing over our shoulders
and just kind of say like hey, hey, like lucky
you there could be action today, Or are we going
to wear an elegant blouse, Like what imageer we try
to put forward that represents best who we are to
give that first date person a sense. So I know
(03:34):
you and I spend a lot of time on you know,
if we're going to wear, for example, a blouse and
maybe we'll wear a more fitted bottom, or if we're
going to wear a camsol, then we're going to wear
like a leather jacket over our shoulders. So we're trying
to do like a chic but sexy but elegant, you know,
kind of age appropriate outfit.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
And if we feel good in it, then that's all
that really matters to us. I also think that, like
for me, venues kind of because I know that a
lot of people probably have their ideal for a date,
but for me, it's it's short and sweet. And I
can speak to that because I've made this mistake. Now,
Like how many times, Louise, have I called you and said,
(04:14):
oh my god, like, what is wrong? I just got
suckered into four hours?
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Well, last week you were on a date. It was
a first date, and it was like four hours. I
couldn't get you on the phone, and I was like,
either you're chopped up. I was got married and just
eloped and didn't want your best friend to come. So
I think you're right. I think the first date really
should be capped at an hour, leave them wanting more,
don't exhaust everything that we're talking about, right, Like, it
(04:39):
should be short and sweet and just enough to give
kind of a sense of like, hey, do I want
to go out with this person again, and if.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
You're anything like me, like set that up ahead of time,
because I always get suckered into the two nice syndrome
where it's like, if it's not terrible, I mean I
can talk to a wall, you can talk to a wall.
I can make any date appear good, but we all
know if you're feeling it or not. And I think
for me, it's like I sit down in the conversation
(05:06):
flows and then sometimes I feel guilty. And I also
think sometimes I'm so I don't know if it's my
ego or what it is, but sometimes I'm so fixated
on like wanting it to be a successful first date,
that I get caught up in that as opposed to like,
what do I feel? Do I want to end this date?
Is this a good use of my Thursday night? Or
(05:27):
would I rather be at home on my couch or
talking to my kids.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
I used to do that. I used to look at
every first date as an audition because rejection was so
hard for me that I would sit there and want
to try to sign the date just to make sure
that I was going to get the call back the
next day, and then I would decide if I wanted
to go out with them? And recently I kind of
switched my focus to your point of like, wait, does
this person align with me? Am I interested? Do I
(05:55):
want to go out them again?
Speaker 3 (05:56):
Like?
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Are we kind of on the same page? And so
I made it less about advice gets the callback and
more about like, do I want to go out with
this person again? Is this somebody that I want to,
you know, spend an hour quite frankly away from you, laughing,
eating goof kitchen and sweats and putting the effort into
getting dressed and putting makeup on and sitting there and
going on a date. So I totally agree with you.
(06:20):
You know, it's interesting going back to the concept of
a first date. I am one who does not and
I know you feel the same way. We do not
do video chats, Like I think there's something that gets
lost in translation. I mean, that's part of the problem
with this whole swipe mentality is it's all based on physicality,
like swipe, swipe, swipe, sipe. Who's really reading the description?
And I think so much has to do with like
(06:42):
an energy and an aura and like almost like an
ingredients of connection between two people on a date. So
I actually don't do video chat first dates, But.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Do you insist on calling them or I mean or
having a conversation.
Speaker 1 (06:55):
Always have a phone call, So try to pivot pretty
quickly from a text to all unless it's a setup.
If it's a setup, to be honest with you, and
the person has been vetted from somebody in my life,
like I'm good just to have the kind of text
to make the date arrangement and then meet them in
person for the first time. If it's an app then
I think a phone call is super super important. But
(07:18):
I I definitely like to meet in person for the
first time. And I'm one who prefers a glass of
wine and not a hike for a coffee date. I
think it's a personal preference of where somebody feels their
most most comfortable. Some people want to, you know, wear
leggings and be like this is me, you know, love
me for who I am, instead of done up with
(07:38):
like the glamor. I like the idea of, you know,
putting myself together and showing up and sitting in a
place where there's a vibe and an atmosphere to kind
of help kind of fuel the energy a little bit.
And I'm always better on a goss of wine. Anyways,
I am too.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
But did I tell you when I asked on my
date this guy, I said, so, what makes you choose
a coffee date of our cocktail date? And his answer, yes,
this was his answer. He's like, I do it when
I'm not really sure of the pictures and if the
girl is going to be truly how she's represented online,
So I do it so that I can be sober
and really check her out.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
Interesting. I mean, look, there's a lot of people that
have been at this game for a long time, and
everybody kind of has their greatest hits playlist of what
works for them or what is their their comfort level,
and you know, it's almost indicative of like people connecting
or not, Like does is our chemistry compass lined up?
(08:38):
Or do our i hate to say, childhood wounds line up?
Or our baggage. It's interesting, it's a fascinating it's a
fascinating game, and I've learned to love the idea of
first dates.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
Let's talk about dating apps, because aren't ninety nine of
us kind of forced or subjected to that's what we
need to do to meet people. I mean, these days, Louise,
do agree.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
It's hard because I've I've been on apps briefly and
it made me uncomfortable and I prefer setups, but setups
are fewer and far between. So I kind of look
at all of it and I'm always just open to
a first date, like if somebody wants to set me up,
or if there's somebody interesting enough on an app. Like
my time is just not that valuable in that I
(09:22):
can spare an hour to meet somebody. And I think
that people come into our lives because they're supposed to, right.
I don't believe in random encounters. I think whether somebody
is supposed to be a lesson or a blessing, or
it's somebody that can be you know, kind of punted
to somebody else, right Like I remember I was once
having this conversation like one woman's trash could be another
(09:44):
woman's treasure, right. Like, So I'm always open to everything.
And you know, I have a lot of friends who
spend a lot of time and they want to like
Google and they want to know like where do they live,
and what do they do, what's their job and this
and that. It's like I don't even do the I'm
going to be in a safe space, public space, like
I'm okay, Like I'm not going to Google, I'm not
(10:04):
going to get preconceived motions. I go in now, super
super open, and I think it's like kind of what
works for you and the way that we can increase
our numbers and of a dating app, which really, if
you think about it, it's like the days of standing
in a Starbucks line or you know what, guy approaches
(10:24):
a table of five girls eating dinner. It's so rare.
We'd be better off sitting at a bar by ourselves,
which is kind of scary and I don't know, makes
me feel super insecure. But a guy will talk to
a girl sitting at a bar by herself, or maybe
if you and I are like, look what happened last
Oh god, what happened last week? Was that crazy?
Speaker 2 (10:43):
Oh my god? Oh my god? That was that was
creat You.
Speaker 1 (10:46):
Have to tell the story because it talks about how
we put our put ourselves together and the energy we
give off.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
Okay, well, so Louise and I are at a bar
and we're sitting there in our slash bar. Yeah yeah,
and I I always and bibe a little more than
she does, so I'm always on my second glass of
wine while she's still nursing her first I'm very measured,
so anyway, so I had ordered the second glass and
there was a guy sitting next to Louise, and I
(11:16):
guess he noticed that her glass was empty as I'm
like halfway through with my second, and so he all
of a sudden, glass of red wine shows up, and
you know your glass was empty, clearly mine wasn't. And
so we start striking up a conversation with him, and
he was nice, but he was definitely older. He didn't
(11:37):
look older. I think he actually looked great for his age.
That's like the nice compliment I have here is that
he looked great for his age. But it did proceed
to get a little sketchy. But like we're gluttons for punishment,
so we just kept on the conversation going.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
But we also felt bad, like he bought a drink
for us. He was right next to us. We hadn't
even gotten our food, so we were not going anywhere.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Oh god, okay, I'm interrupting you. So that's a total topic.
Where you and I think I think we disagree on
is that I feel so uncomfortable when somebody has bought
me dinner or a drink. And that's often why I
have a hard time getting up during a date, because
I somehow feel like I owe them something. Do you
feel that way?
Speaker 1 (12:17):
Well, that was a different situation. We were still sitting
there and he had just sent a drink and he
was like, next us. You know what I'm saying. So
I feel like again, I mean, this is let me
just put this bluntly. I had a friend who's dating
a guy this was awful, and he paid for her
to get her boobs done and some other work done,
and then she calls me up two weeks post surgery.
(12:38):
She's like, yeah, I'm gonna break up with them. I go, what,
you can't do that? Like he bought you boobs, Like
he's got it. You can't just be so obvious, right,
So it's like I think those are extreme cases. But again,
like if I in my own head have carved out
that we're gonna have a drink for an hour and
I have said I have a dinner I'm going to,
(12:58):
then I'm okay with them buying me a drink. I
mean you and I look at that a little bit
differently now if it's flowing like I was on a
date last week and it was a drink date, and
it was a setup and we had agreed it was
going to be an hour, and all of a sudden,
like we're getting at the forty five minute mark, he's like, oh,
by the way, I have another hour. And I was like,
(13:19):
and I remember in my head thinking, okay, like I
do like him, I'm enjoying him, but I don't want
to be too available. So I was like, okay, I
have about twenty more minutes. Remember, because you and I
met after for dinner. Yeah, and he bought my glass
of wine and you know, he said do you want
an appetizer? Which I thought was super classy, but that
(13:40):
was based on the flow of that. It was clear
that we were having a good time and connecting.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
What do you feel if somebody has anyone ever asked
you to split the bill or like, what's your take
when people do that on a day?
Speaker 1 (14:02):
Look, I know this is not the popular, you know,
kind of climate right now, but I don't think chivalry
is dead. And for me, I'm raising two sons and
I have taught them to be chivalrous and respectful of women,
and it's really important to me, you know, I'm never
going to be the girl who orders you know, the
crazy steak or you know, the expensive thing on the menu.
(14:24):
But if somebody's asked me out, I really appreciate when
they pay for my pay for my wine.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
I mean, I totally agree to chivalry is not dead.
I feel like I often like do the pull out
the credit card or offer just so that I know
that you know what I mean, that I'm making the effort.
But between you and me, if then they take me
up on it, I do, I'm kind of like, oh,
like that's not really Like are you really a gentleman?
And I'm not saying that if you go on multiple
(14:54):
dates with somebody that you don't want to start or
that I think while you're.
Speaker 1 (14:58):
Dating somebody, sure always pay for meals or whatever at.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
The beginning beginning. I think it's nice and it does
mean yeah, I agree, and I'm not worrying alone.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
You know, one of the things, you know, you and
I speak a lot about, and you know, I think
sometimes I ask simply too many questions to deflect the
attention off of me, and I get scared of silence
at a table because I don't like bad flow. So
I'm always trying to think, and one of the things
I love to do is ask open ended questions because
you can learn a lot about somebody by the questions
(15:31):
you ask. I mean super basic questions like where do
you see yourself in five years? And what if they
were to say like dating lots of people and then
you're sitting there and you're saying yourself, Okay, this guy's
a player, Like he's not looking for a life partner,
he's not looking for long a long term relationship. So
I think that you know, it's always good to go
(15:51):
on a date and have your kind of catchphrase questions
that will help you pretty quickly size up who they
are and you know what their core value system is, right,
because ultimately we're trying to chemistry is important, but it's
really important to say, like, find somebody whose core value
systems kind of line up with ours.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
So question for you when you go out on a
first date with somebody, do you feel like when you
sit down and kind of you probably had a conversation
or two write potentially with them, but when you sit down,
do you feel like within the first five minutes, like,
what is louder to you the chemistry that you're feeling
or lack thereof, or the questions that you're asking them
(16:34):
and their answers like this is so hard.
Speaker 1 (16:37):
I mean, I grapple with this all the time because
of course we all want that dopamine hit and that
like instant, like you know what we see in the movies, right,
And I think that I again, like, well, I've read
a lot of books because I'm trying to understand like
who am I, what am I looking for? And what
makes the most sense for quite frankly, why do my
marriage fail? And why have you know, these relationships that
(16:59):
I in the last nine years, why haven't they stuck
or why didn't it go the distance? Like they have
felt like bridges to me? And what I've learned is
is one thing I used to sit on a date
and be like, is this my guy? Am I going
to marry him? Or are we going to ride out
from too the sense I don't do that anymore. I
sit on my first date and I say, is this
person interesting enough? Would I go out and have a
(17:20):
second date with him? And then on the second date
would I go out with them on a third date?
And what that has helped me do is learn to
build a little bit more of a foundation and focus
less on the butterflies, because butterflies are really kind of
like a trigger of something that's potentially familiar in a
way that's triggering to what is your baggage? Right? And
(17:45):
I think you have to have some degree of attraction
for sure, But I think there is so much more
that is important. And I think attraction you have to
have some like I don't think it just can I
think it can improve. I think it can grow, but
you have to have some degree of attraction when you're
sitting there. But I think it's like an entire almost pizza, right,
(18:09):
there's like equal slices, a really important thing. So I
think it's a combination of core values, chemistry, communication, connection,
like are you living the same life?
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Like?
Speaker 1 (18:20):
You know? What I've learned in my dating is I
don't want to be a somebody who's not a parent.
I don't want to be somebody's never been married. It
doesn't work for me. We don't speak the same language.
Some people might not care. They might not look at
it like, oh there's no kids, great, there's more time
for them to focus on me and work around my schedule.
What about you? What do you think how important chemistry
on the first date for you, well.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
I think chemistry is important. Like if I'm absolutely not
attracted to somebody, you know, it doesn't matter, that's not
going to change. Although I think people can become more attractive,
you know, the more you learn about someone.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
And their energy.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
No, and I completely agree with that, and we've talked
about this. I think question we ask ourselves is how
long do you stay in a relationship or how many
dates do you go on before you ultimately either call
it and decide do I want? Is this how I
want to be spending my time? And I think I
(19:17):
feel like both of us are pretty lucky. You know,
no one wants to be post divorced, but often post
divorce I feel like means you're a little bit older
and hopefully a little bit wiser. But we have pretty
good lives, right, I Mean, the reality is we have
such good girlfriends, we love being with our kids, and
(19:37):
it takes a lot for me to decide do I
want to break away from all those things to go
out on a date. But I think a lot of
the dates that we've gone on, or relationships that I
won't speak for you, but for me, relationships that I've
had we talk back to what you refer to as
the bridge. And sometimes you get out of a relationship
and it's super devastating or sad. You kind of wonder
(20:00):
how you're going to push forward. And sometimes the next
guy that comes along is totally different, but he helps
you kind of look at your life through a different
lens and move on so and gives you that restart
right for potentially the next guy. I don't know if
that makes sense. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1 (20:18):
I think for me a lot of times what happens
is is I'll be dating or eye that on paper
is a ten right, like everything I want, you know,
and so I keep going to keep hoping that it's
going to, you know, kind of go to the next
level or I'm going to I remember once I was
dating this guy and he was everything I wanted and
(20:40):
I just wasn't feeling it, but I wanted it so
bad and I kept trying, and I I remember going
to a psychic plus saying can't you do something? Can't
you do some waving around? So I like wake up
and I'm like hit by a lightning bolt and I'm
in love.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
So I just want to know is this my guy?
Like when I talk to the psychic, I'm more like
when am I going to meet the guy? Or is
this the guy?
Speaker 3 (21:04):
Right?
Speaker 1 (21:04):
And the thing about a psychic is what it does
is it helps kind of put in your head so
then you're manifesting and you're looking, and you're this, and
you're I mean, we've all played that game because we
want to believe that the right person is coming. But
I think what I've learned is is, you know, there
is value in every date, every experience, and it's all
(21:26):
kind of building up and what right What might have
been right for me when I was in my twenties
looking for my husband is not right for potentially what
is for me right now? You know what I'm saying.
But let's go back so again, as you know, like
I'm I'm a little more difficult when it comes to
certain things on dates, right, like do they walk me
to my car?
Speaker 2 (21:47):
Like?
Speaker 1 (21:47):
Different things? How do you feel when you make a
date and somebody has to reschedule? Like how does that feel?
Unless if it's like a weird almost like a weird excuse.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Well, it's a good question. I have a first story,
I mean a first tan story I can share with you,
which I think you may have heard before, but I
feel like I have kids, I have a busy life,
and so I think at this age, if somebody needs
to reschedule and is polite about it and gives you,
you know, enough notice, it doesn't have to be crazy notice.
(22:21):
But the night before then it is what it is.
I mean, maybe I'm disappointed, but the truth is, like
I don't want to be I wouldn't want to be
with somebody that was so rigid and unforgiving in a relationship,
so I would kind of want to treat them the
same way. What did they do it a second time? Okay,
well so this wasn't a second time. But do you
(22:43):
remember that I had a date and it was I mean,
I thought, I know it was like objectively, I think
I had a great date with somebody and we went out.
He was a little bit farther away, so he was
like an hour and a half away from where I lived.
So it was always hard for us to schedule dates.
But maybe we'd had a couple dates and we had
(23:05):
a really great date on like a Friday night, and
this was at a time where he was really busy
and I was. My schedule was crazy for like weeks
on end. But this date was so good, and we
both at the date, we're like, oh my gosh, we
totally want to see each other again. Can we figure
out something?
Speaker 1 (23:22):
Well, distance makes it so challenging.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
Also, that's a totally other subject because I think a
plane ride is actually easier than like an hour drive.
But that's me. But anyway, so Monday, so Sunday we
checked in with each other. We're like, okay, looking forward
to tomorrow. And I had.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
Told and that was on the heels of your first kiss, by.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
The way, and I had revamped my whole day on
Monday to accommodate a lunch date, which was like, candidly
really inconvenient, but it's like, okay, we're both in it,
and all of a sudden, Sunday he was great. Monday morning,
I hadn't heard from him by like ten o'clock, and
I was like, hey, just checking in to see, like
are we meeting halfway? What are we doing? And he's like,
(24:01):
I'm so sorry. I just found out that I have
to you know, I can't pick my I have to
pick up my daughter. I have to do something I
can't remember. He's like, I can't really make lunch and
here's the deal, Like everybody has things with their kids.
I do understand that, but he had said I thought
I could swing it, but I was having a trouble
having her time last night figuring it out. And again
(24:23):
things happen, but I did.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
But you were bothered because you reached out to him.
Speaker 2 (24:27):
Well, And I was also bothered that, like if he
thought it was going to be a problem the night before,
like I understand, just say to me, Hey, I'm kind
of having a hiccup here, I don't know if this
is going to happen. But instead he kind of waited
until the eleventh hour and then he canceled, and I
remember calling you, remember, and I was so annoyed because
I literally rescheduled like three other things, and I was like,
(24:48):
I'm going to tell him that's it. And I was
going to be actually super strong and rude, and you
even helped me tone it down. Remember I texted him
and I was like, hey, it was.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
A sharp you had a sharp tongue on that one.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
Yeah. I was like, things come up for everybody, but
in the future, like if you could, if you could
have just reached out the night before, I would have appreciated.
I you know, I rescheduled my day and he said
something and I just like gave him the thumbs up.
Do you remember that?
Speaker 1 (25:12):
He was like, oh, why, well that nothing like the
thumbs up that is the biggest Like.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Like, yeah, I gave him the thumbs up, which is
all I really needed to say. And then he never
called me again, So yeah he did.
Speaker 1 (25:23):
That's okay because next but but again, he was somebody
you met on a dating app, and it goes to
show you that there are some good people on there.
But what I've learned is whether it's a set up
or a dating app, where there's a will, there's a way, right,
Like the truth of the matter is this is where
(25:44):
he went wrong. Was he didn't get ahead of it
and call you'd be like, hey, I really want to
do this, like we did have such a great date,
like I want to throw out another day. That kind
of it kind of went off into the distance. So
that felt bad, and I don't know, it just lost
its team.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
But here's the deal. I know our date was good,
and nothing happened between our date and me.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
Basically what's happened. But regardless of.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
What happened, I also think that the biggest thing that
I've learned is like I spoke my truth. I said
what I felt. If that was not what he wanted
to hear, well, then he's not my guy. And so
I really feel like I'm pretty good at this point
to understand that, like if things aren't working out or
I'm not connecting with somebody, then like just move on.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
That's the difference between dating now, you know, kind of
post divorced with kids and versus like when we're just
starting out. And I think that you know, when you're
in our stage of our lives and we're looking for
a chapter two, like it has to be totally additive, right,
Like we're busy, we have children, we have jobs, we
have family, we have friends. We're quite content to stay
(27:03):
home and read a book, right and just like FaceTime
with you.
Speaker 2 (27:06):
And I'm not looking for somebody to give me kids
or a white picket fence like And I think it's
also like shifting your perspective to find gratitude in that
instead of desperation. You know what I'm saying, Because I
think the greatest thing about not being twenty five and
wondering like am I gonna have a child? And I
don't want to say anything if people do or don't.
(27:27):
You know, there are many people probably still wanting to
have children, but like, I feel like I've already had
a really full life and so I'm happy with my
life and if somebody comes along to compliment it, then great,
but if not, like that's okay too.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
And we've always talked about being golden girls and all
of us living together and in our kind of you know,
seventy year old sorority house with like all of our
fun friends and living and watch you know, we watch
Bellow's Place back then. Who knows what we'll be watching
in ten years from now.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
And let's be honest, like, sometimes it's more fun. And
I think that that brings up the comsation about dating
and how about putting yourself out there because I feel
like you it's so funny. Okay, you're kind of upset.
You're more obsessed with my dating life than I think
I am. If we're being.
Speaker 1 (28:14):
Oh well, let's talk about so what have I done?
Speaker 2 (28:17):
I mean, okay, well, here's the deal. In fairness, you
are from here, so you get set up all the time. Okay,
you're always getting set up with people. I am not
from here. I moved here. I really have. I have friends,
but like they're gay or they're my girlfriends. So it's
not like I have a ton of opportunities. I mean
maybe that's an excuse, but like a ton of opportunities
(28:37):
to get set up. So you have really been pushing me,
and I love how you always say to me there's
no excuse, there's no excuse for you not going.
Speaker 1 (28:44):
It doesn't just drop out of sky.
Speaker 3 (28:46):
I get it.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
But you've been saying to me like you need to
go on a day a week, A day a week.
I'm like, where do you think I am going to
procure a day to week? Like, I mean, am I
asking out the guy? Journy mean at the grocery store?
I mean, who am I asking out? So I feel
like you've been really pushing me on that, which brings
up the conversation of online dating. And so finally when
I said to you, there's no way and how that
(29:08):
I'm going to be able to get a guy a
week to go out on a date with, let alone,
do I want to go out in a day week?
But I did humor you and say fine, So we
did start online dating, and I don't.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
Know if we should you do let's repeat the week. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:22):
I don't really feel like this is cat fishing because
it's kind of like, actually, I think it's in everyone's
best interest. But here is here's how we kind of
have made it work for us.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
Right.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
I feel like online dating is a total drag, and
I feel like people get or at least the reason
I don't like it is.
Speaker 1 (29:41):
Told change the lens and look at it as an
opportunity to cast the net win.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
I got it in the short term, like it's exhausting, right, Like,
when I get home, I want to do five million
other things than sit in swape. And I told you that.
And so here was the compromise, right that we came
up with. So he came over to my house. When
was it was it election night? When was I don't
even know when it was. You came over to my house.
We watched TV.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
Now I had already started swiping election night. It was
a few days prior.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
Okay, So we we mutually approved my pictures. We mutually wrote.
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Well, let's talk about the profile for one minute, okay.
So I feel profiles need to be unique. It needs
to It's kind of like a kid's essay to call,
you know, application of college, Like we're all a diamond dozen.
We like yoga, we like to go out to dinner,
we like to travel. Like, how are we going to
(30:37):
set you apart so that when somebody is you know,
looking at the pictures and then reading the three sentences? Basically,
how are we going to make you memorable?
Speaker 2 (30:46):
Oh and and let me say the first pass that
I took at it, it said what is your dream Sunday?
And I can't remember exactly what I said, but I
said it was boring, something like wake up, go to
the gym.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
It was so it was so unmemorable.
Speaker 2 (31:02):
And then and then I was like, you know, maybe
meet friends for brunch, then do some errands, like make
my list for the next week, like for the next
week so I'm prepared for the week ahead, and rent
watch a movie and go to bend.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
I was boring, so I rewrote it.
Speaker 2 (31:18):
Boring It's my dream Sunday, like I was authentic.
Speaker 1 (31:22):
I get it. But I changed it up a little
bit and I rewrote it, and uh, we're we are
dating together as we know, So basically, listeners, I am
doing the online dating for Thelma and what happens is
is I do the swiping, and then once we are
(31:43):
quot a match, then we do some texting and then
I give her phone number out and then I call
her and I say, expect a phone call from this guy.
Let me know how your first day goes. And it's
actually been working. We've met really nice people so far.
It hasn't been your person, but we are able to
the one day to week. You've had a few breakup
texts which we've worked on, which we've been fine.
Speaker 2 (32:05):
We should talk about that after the break How do
you do the breakup text but.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Be super transparent?
Speaker 2 (32:09):
It's been actually really it's because here's the fun we're
doing it. Everything is more fun together, so I feel
like it's not as painful to do it with a friend.
I also think you could say it's misleading, but heresto,
I think it only works because you and I have
very we're both pretty one day, we could show up
on the date together, yeah, and we do laugh. Remember
(32:30):
I was like, what are we going to do if
you totally fall in love with somebody? And then we
were like, maybe we just both show up together and
kind of it's a TV show then yeah, So anyway,
it works because we kind of have the same personality
in certain ways. We also know each other so well,
so she can answer all of these things. But we
have had some funny texts, like like she drinks coffee.
(32:50):
I don't drink coffee, and I think if she says
to one more guy, oh, I'm just sitting having coffee
because I have been asked out on a lot of
coffee dates and I'm like, okay, uh got to stop
with the coffee because everybody's inviting me out to coffee
and I don't drink coffee. So We've had a few
funny things, and I definitely have to always look back
at the profile to be like, Okay, what have we
(33:11):
talked about?
Speaker 1 (33:11):
I told her to put into her contacts on her phone,
like the person's name and like a little bumble bee.
Speaker 2 (33:17):
Oh, I've got like fifty five bumblebees. And I'm basically
like a hostess at a restaurant, you know, who always
has to write down like large dark haired man glasses.
Do you know what I mean? With three kids in toe,
I mean I basically have a note section on my
phone so that when I get the call, it is
hard between the spam calls that you get the random
(33:37):
now numbers before I actually have entered it into my thing.
It's like I never pick up my phone blindly. Like ever,
let's talk about though, their profile pictures.
Speaker 1 (33:49):
The popcorn ceilings, the tank tops, the muscles.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
So like there's some things that are just obvious nos, right,
But like, what do you think about when I mean,
because we both have kids, what do you think about
when a profile has uh, when they have pictures their
kids and their pictures.
Speaker 1 (34:07):
Well, look, it's again for me, it's important that whoever
I date has had children, because I have data people
that don't have kids. So I don't think every picture
should have kids in it. But I to see a
picture of them like skiing with their kids, which shows
me they're a good dad, and they're connected and they're
doing activities and he has kids. One picture like that,
I like that. Actually, something like that I would be
(34:29):
more apt to swipe right than not right, because if
I see a picture of just somebody, just his picture
of his face or selfies, and I can't tell like
who is you like, show me what you're interested in,
show me a part of your life. Then you know
it's easier for me and you get to sensitize. I
mean it's like your finger just goes to the left,
the left, the left is exhausting, then your eyes begin
(34:49):
to dilate.
Speaker 2 (34:50):
Yeah, I mean, if you see like six pictures of
a loner in a bathroom taking selfies with like those
awful fluorescensesn't align with.
Speaker 1 (34:59):
What we're looking for or or the kind of person
that we want.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
I got it. But we might have to have a
little talk after this, because I will tell you the
kids thing. I mean, I'm never gonna put pictures of
my kids online, especially initially, but I also I do
appreciate if they want to put pictures of their kids,
but for me being in my fifties with older kids,
like if I see an infant or a toddler in
(35:22):
a picture, it's like, yeah, it's like I don't walk
because I mean not that I don't love kids, but
like I love my kids. But I'm not done that. Yeah,
and I'm not looking. I'm not going back to I
can't talk about how many people, how many people before
we've even gone on a date. If one more guy
who I literally have had one phone call with or
(35:43):
one text with sends me pictures with his children before
I've even met him. It's like, where do they think
that this is hot? It's just it's so not And
I don't know if they think that women think it's
endearing that they have children. I'm like, I know you
have kids, but I don't even know you. So one,
don't try to pimp out your kids to me. And two,
I'm not like, I don't want to play mom. I
just want to date you.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
But also we're not interested in meeting somebody's kids right away,
Like I have really strong I totally do. I've been
you know, divorced for nine years and I've dated a lot,
and my kids have met one person, and I you know,
we've been dating, and I figured, you know, at this point,
you know, my kids, I think really want me to
find a good person. So I thought it was stored
(36:24):
that you're home alone with important that well, I'm on
three sixty still, so they see them out all the time,
but that they that So I introduced them to somebody,
as you know, and you know, they didn't really like him.
And quite frankly, I've learned that none of my friends
don't even liked him. So what do we do if
your kids and your friends disapprove with somebody that you're enjoying.
(36:44):
But I usually now, because that thing went up in flames,
I think it's good that my kids met somebody at
six months. It was not like a month. I think
it's very strange when somebody wants you to meet their
kids within a month, as if they're trying to slot
in a new mommy or something. But I did six months,
and you know, I thought that was appropriate because we
are clearly exclusive. But now I'm going to think twice
(37:07):
because you know, at this point, like my kids aren't
even home. I mean, they're in college, They're on to
their next their next chapter. So I'm not rushing it
anytime soon. I wanted the next person that my kids
meet because this thing did not go well, it's going
to be somebody I pretty much know I'm going to
end up with. Like I love being by children. I
don't need a Brady budget, right, Like, I don't need
(37:27):
to have this guy my kids all the time on
the you know, rare nights that I even have them
home anymore. So it's going to be even further apart
when I do that.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
I think, in my mind, well, my ex husband I
both said like six months, and I think he waited
three years when he was with somebody, so like he
was super respectful, and I think for me, I feel
like six months is kind of the minimum for me.
But more so it's I won't introduce anyone to my
(37:57):
kids unless I see a potential future with them, because
I just don't think it's worth it. Ay, it's kind
of my private life, and I don't know if I
don't ever think it's going to actually impact them, then, Like,
there are a lot of days I don't have my children,
so I don't need to introduce somebody to my kids,
you know. I also think sometimes they are wondering what
you're doing. So if it starts to be this one
(38:19):
thing where you're with somebody all the time, I definitely
like familiarize them with the idea.
Speaker 1 (38:24):
I tell my kids when I'm dating somebody. But I
say them, I'm not going to sit you down at
a table with them until I know that this is
going to go, you know, the distance or somewhat of
a distance. Like, but I do tell my kids what
I'm doing, like I AlwaysOn.
Speaker 2 (38:38):
I said to my last boyfriend six months, and then
six months came. It passed then it like eight months,
ten months, and then he started being like, this is
really weird. I want to meet your children, And I think.
Speaker 1 (38:51):
That was kind of addicative of what I know.
Speaker 2 (38:53):
But I finally after a year, did it. But it
was also because it was long distance, and I feel
like we always met, you know, so my kids were
going to be there, we were going to have to
sleep in the same house with this person. And I'm
just super private about that with my kids, Like your
kids don't want to envision you actually having a romantic life,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (39:12):
It's just I mean, you know, it's amazing some there
are This topic is endless. I mean, we could do
nine thousand questions and like go on and on because
we have so much experience. And I think what I
find we're spreshing about always talking to you is a
we're not we're not in this alone and it's ever changing,
and you know, I don't know, like it's just such
(39:35):
a connecting with people and meeting people and will life
is right. It's relationships, it's friendships, it's you know, relationships,
it's dates, it's relationships with our children or whatever it is.
But I don't know, I feel like I love talking
to you, and I feel like, you know, always up
to answer people's questions or have these like kind of
you know girls, girls chats about dating and navigating dating,
(39:59):
and I don't know, like I'm I'm glad we're in
this together, and I do love that I we're dating
literally together. I appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
And I mean basically, when or if I finally ever
do get a boyfriend off of our online dating experience,
I feel like, oh, I'm speaking at the wedding. I know, well, no,
we're walking down the aisle together, aren't we? Oh?
Speaker 1 (40:19):
Yes? Oh yes? So anything else left to say? And
we'll come back another time and ask a million other
things like asking a on a first date for a
second date. Is that a red flag? Or all of
that stuff? Or do you text the next day to
say thank you? I don't all those different things. It's
you know, dating at twenty, dating at fifty. It's it's
(40:40):
still dating, right, and everybody wants to love and be
loved and find a person.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
I don't know. You might be my person, you might
be my personally by way.
Speaker 1 (40:49):
I'd be okay with that. Like you know me, There's
been many times that I've been dating somebody where When
you call to say what are you doing that? I
wish I could, you know, cancel my date and go
out to dinner with you, even if it's just sitting
at home and watching TikTok and ordering good kitchen.
Speaker 2 (41:02):
Totally agree, So let's plan our date for tonight.
Speaker 1 (41:05):
Okay, what are you gonna where? Thank you? Say bye.
Speaker 3 (41:11):
Hey, It's Jenny Garth. Thanks Thelma and Louise for that
fun takeover. If you are a single and want dating advice,
or if you're ready to find love again, we want
to get to know you. Call us. The number is
one eight four four four I Do Pod. That's one
(41:31):
eight four four four four three six seven sixty three
or email us at ID pod at iHeartRadio dot com,
follow us on Instagram and TikTok at I Do Part
two pod. All of this information will be in the
show notes. Make sure to rate and review the podcast
I Do Part two and iHeartRadio podcast where falling in
(41:53):
love is the main objective.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
On three
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