Phone Tap: Mixed Up Matchmaker

In your Phone Tap, Brooke calls a guy who has been unlucky in love so far in life, but thanks to his friends signing him up for a matchmaking service, he’s about to get WAY more than he bargained for!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
We got an email from a listener who says one
of her good guy friends has been struggling big time
in the dating arena. He's tried apps and blind dates,
but nothing is working. So she convinced him to apply
to a personalized matchmaking service. Just sent in his application.
It's a little bit pricey, but I think well worth it,

(00:21):
especially once he meets his matchmaking sense. That would be Brooke.

Speaker 2 (00:28):
Let's go.

Speaker 1 (00:28):
She gets right down to business in your phone, tap
right now?

Speaker 3 (00:37):
Hello?

Speaker 4 (00:38):
Hi is this Brent du.

Speaker 3 (00:41):
Yeah it is. Who's this?

Speaker 4 (00:43):
My name is Jenna Rossady from Matchmaker's USA. We received
your online application to join our program. Oh hi, Hi,
So I'm just curious off the bat, what made you apply?

Speaker 3 (01:00):
I've been single for a while and I've tried some
of the apps and nothing's working. Yeah, so I talked
to my friend and they recommended your service, and I
thought maybe you can help me.

Speaker 4 (01:16):
You know what, Brent, I'm going to stop you right
there and say, I do see what you're doing, and
I'm taken.

Speaker 3 (01:27):
I'm not sure I understand.

Speaker 4 (01:30):
You know what you're doing.

Speaker 3 (01:33):
I do.

Speaker 4 (01:34):
Your profile reads like you're kind of a dud, but
what much more than that? Aren't you.

Speaker 3 (01:41):
My profile seemed like I was a dad. I worked
very hard on that.

Speaker 4 (01:46):
Actually, look, you're not the first man or woman for
that matter, that's heard this voice and immediately try to
run game on me.

Speaker 2 (01:56):
I'm a little confused.

Speaker 4 (02:01):
Are you single? No, I've already told you. But I'm
doing this job a long time, so I know when
I'm about to be propositioned and I will say I'm flattered.

Speaker 3 (02:14):
There must be some kind of misunderstanding, ma'am. I don't
think that's what's going on here.

Speaker 4 (02:20):
I understood completely. You were curious to know what I
looked like in a neglige what and you're never gonna
know that because, like I said, I'm in a relationship
with myself. I realized the best person for me was me.

Speaker 3 (02:43):
You're single or you're not single.

Speaker 4 (02:47):
Oh, you love to pry. It's just like emotionally, physically, intimately, experimentally,
it's all about me.

Speaker 3 (02:58):
That sounds very exciting.

Speaker 4 (03:01):
You are right, it's called soloonogamy.

Speaker 3 (03:05):
I've never heard of solo anogamy.

Speaker 4 (03:07):
Well enough about me, though, right, let's get back to you.
So I ran your profile through our algorithm and we
did find a match.

Speaker 2 (03:17):
Oh yeah, oh, really.

Speaker 4 (03:19):
Yeah, she checked all your boxes and I think you
are going to be so pleasantly surprised.

Speaker 3 (03:28):
Wow, that's wonderful. Actually, I didn't expect that to happen
so quickly. Can you tell me anything about her?

Speaker 4 (03:36):
Oh? I sure can. It's me. Isn't that crazy?

Speaker 3 (03:46):
That is shocking? Actually, don't you work at the matchmaking agency?

Speaker 4 (03:53):
I do, but that doesn't preclude me from seeing others.
What am we gonna do? Be left out of the fun.

Speaker 3 (04:00):
He just told me that you're solonogamous and that you're
in a relationship with yourself.

Speaker 4 (04:06):
Well that's true, but I'm just not going to tell
myself what I'm doing. What I don't know doesn't hurt me.

Speaker 3 (04:12):
I am so confused.

Speaker 4 (04:15):
Well, the only question I have for you is this Friday?
What should I wear?

Speaker 3 (04:21):
Well?

Speaker 4 (04:21):
What shouldn't I wear?

Speaker 2 (04:26):
So? I signed up for a matchmaking service and then
you told me that I was hitting on you, But
then you said that you're dating yourself. And then you
said that we matched and that you're cheating on yourself
and we're going to go out on Friday.

Speaker 4 (04:42):
Don't use that word so naughty. I don't want myself
to know. Remember, So, where are you taking me?

Speaker 3 (04:55):
Well, I guess we could go for tacos and Mark readA.

Speaker 4 (05:02):
I can't let this go on any longer. I have
to tell you it's a break phone call.

Speaker 3 (05:06):
What what? What are you talking about?

Speaker 4 (05:09):
This is actually Brooke for the radio show Brooke and
Jeffrey in the Morning.

Speaker 3 (05:13):
Oh my god, are you kidding me?

Speaker 4 (05:15):
Amy said you'd fall for that. She's the one that
set you up for this.

Speaker 3 (05:19):
That was so weird and uncomfortable.

Speaker 4 (05:22):
Whatever I heard jealousy in your voice, you heard.

Speaker 3 (05:25):
That it should have been should have been fear.

Speaker 4 (05:29):
The week of every morning was Foo Tap weekday mornings
on the twenties Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.