Brynn Whitfield Gets Real About the Housewives Reboot

Brynn Whitfield opens up to Gia about how the RHONY reboot abused her story. She shares the difficulties of juggling a 9-5 while filming, how the show ruined her dating life, and why she ultimately walked away from all of it, including the cast.  

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey guys, and welcome back to another episode of Casual Chaos.
This week, we have a very exciting guest, a New
York queen Brint with Field.

Speaker 2 (00:09):
Welcome to Jesus, thank you for having me. I'm so
excited to have you.

Speaker 3 (00:13):
Oh you're so sweet.

Speaker 1 (00:14):
So how are you?

Speaker 3 (00:15):
I'm good. I'm good.

Speaker 1 (00:17):
How are you? I'm good? So you live in New
York City? Yes, how do you like it? People call
you the New York City Queen. How long have you
been in New York?

Speaker 3 (00:27):
I don't know with queen, I have been in New
York for ten years. I did a three or four
year stint in my twenties. Then I moved to LA
and then I moved back before COVID, and I stayed
here during COVID. So I say, like, I'm a true
New Yorker now, like, yeah, pictures walking in Time Score
with my old dog, with my former dog, my former
dog Pepper, and Time Score is completely empty, just me

(00:49):
and my dog. Like, so I'm like, after that, I
earned my stripes and I'm a real New Yorker now.

Speaker 1 (00:53):
Oh yeah, that's probably pretty cool though. Yeah, same times
Square not busy.

Speaker 3 (00:59):
It was like a Will Smith movie, but it was. Yeah,
it was interesting, But I'm a New Yorker.

Speaker 1 (01:04):
I love that. I just moved to Jersey City and
I have been loving it.

Speaker 3 (01:08):
I saw the apartment, looks sick.

Speaker 1 (01:10):
Thank you nice? Yeah, No, I absolutely love it. I'm
like still treading lightly on me making my way into
New York fully, but I think I don't know.

Speaker 3 (01:23):
Say and I think it's it's great. Then you can
come in and out and down.

Speaker 1 (01:27):
I just love it because then it's like I come home, yeah,
and I'm like, I just escaped the chaos. I'm in
my own bubble now. I like being in my own
little bubble. Casual.

Speaker 3 (01:38):
Yeah, it's more, you can get away a little.

Speaker 1 (01:41):
Life's casually chaotic. It's just how it is. What are
your favorite parts about the city.

Speaker 3 (01:46):
Oh god, I hate the traffic. One of my favorite
parts are it's the people. That's actually what COVID taught me.
Like New York is lovely. I love the architecture. I
love everything about it. It's amazing city. But when COVID happened,
everyone was gone. I mean everyone was gone. There's nowhere
here at aside from workers and like even no like
trash collectors were gone. And it fell a Gotham city

(02:08):
and it was a little scary and I didn't like it.
I mean, it's the people that make it, even the
people that yell at you. I was just me and
a taxi driver coming here. We rolled down our window.
We're yelling at a bus driver that like, even that
bus driver, I still like them, you know, because they
like looked us off back and it's like.

Speaker 1 (02:23):
Yeah, it's just the energy. There's nothing like New York.

Speaker 3 (02:26):
There's nothing, and it can make you anxious or drive
you nuts, but there's literally it's this epicenter of the world.
Like I don't feel there's no it's impossible to get
fomo here. I don't feel like I'm missing out anywhere
else because this is like everything is here, this is.

Speaker 1 (02:38):
Where everything's happening. So where were you prior to New York?
What brought you here in your twenties? Okay?

Speaker 3 (02:44):
So I always go chronological orders. So when University Washington,
d C. Then Los Angeles, then New York, then Los
Angeles then back to New York. Wow, and now I'm
between New York and London.

Speaker 1 (02:55):
Yeah, oh I love that. So where were you born and.

Speaker 3 (02:58):
Raised in Indiana?

Speaker 1 (02:59):
Okay?

Speaker 3 (03:00):
Well, born in Michigan in Anna Arbury, Michigan.

Speaker 1 (03:02):
You sister goes to Yeah, my sister goes to University
of Michigan.

Speaker 3 (03:05):
Because you em yes smart events which one.

Speaker 1 (03:07):
Oh she's so smart. She's smart, she's eat school, amazing. Gabriella,
so she's the It's me Gabrielle and Milania Adriana. She's
twenty one, she's a junior at university.

Speaker 3 (03:16):
I know people have gotten IVY. My friends kids have
got the IVY leagues Georgetown, and they choose you. M
oh it's yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (03:22):
I mean, obviously the schooling is incredibly challenging and it's
super competitive, but she has had the best three years
of her entire life. I'm actually going to visit her
on Monday. Oh she's studying abroad right now in Barcelona,
so we're ending her semester abroad in Sicily and I'm
so excited.

Speaker 3 (03:42):
This is so glamorous. I love that you guys are
also smart.

Speaker 1 (03:45):
She's just she's a world traveler though, she's amazing, like
this is She's never been happier. This is this is
her call, this is her calling.

Speaker 3 (03:52):
Oh yeah she score no, wait, scool, she's Satius.

Speaker 1 (03:56):
Its October fourth, libra.

Speaker 3 (03:58):
Okay, thank you, Yeah, Libra's to travel to type very tight. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (04:04):
No.

Speaker 3 (04:04):
So I I was born in ann Arbor and then
like kind of moved around between relatives, but then start
living with my grandmother when I was like three, I
think around like three or four or something like that
in Indiana and then there my entire life. Never even
got on a plane untills like sixteen or seventeen. And
then went to Purdue and after that then DC LA

(04:25):
New York, LA.

Speaker 1 (04:26):
New York Wow, back and forth, back and forth. So
you've been everywhere, yeah, or just like two you know,
back and forth a little bit.

Speaker 3 (04:32):
Yeah, A typical India, like a Midwestern that like grows
up watching too many like movies and TV. I like,
you know, I would watch like Troop Beverly Hills, and
I wanted to live in Beverly Hills. I live there,
and I'd like watch Sex and the City and all
these movies, Like I wanted to live in New York.

Speaker 1 (04:45):
Yeah. I feel like it's inspiring place to live. I
want to be there one day.

Speaker 3 (04:49):
Yeah, and everything that you think it is, it is
like the feeling that I had, but like what it
would be like living in New York or you watch
like Devil war'st Prod or any of these movies or
Gossip Girl. It is literally like O g.

Speaker 1 (05:00):
Roney, it is.

Speaker 3 (05:02):
It is literally that is New York. Like it does
exist that Like it might sound cheesy, but it's like
that feeling, that thing they're like, oh my god, any
make care can may get anywhere. It's the you know,
it's a jay Z song. It's like it is so
it's part in the New York is Actually that's all real.
It's not like a little thing that's only in movies
and TV.

Speaker 1 (05:20):
So obviously everywhere that you've lived, New York still always
calls your name.

Speaker 3 (05:25):
Yeah, in New York is home. I don't really go
back to Indiana anymore. But New York to me now
is like when people, even when I'm abroad, own the
people I like, where are you from? Like, oh, you're American?
I say, no, I'm a New Yorker.

Speaker 1 (05:37):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (05:37):
Yeah, there's a difference on America.

Speaker 1 (05:39):
Yeah. I love that. What does your perfect day look
like in New York City?

Speaker 3 (05:45):
Oh, perfect day? Okay, would be getting I actually just
had a perfect day two days ago. I love it
would be fall because I love New York in the fall.
It's like a movie set.

Speaker 1 (05:55):
It's the best.

Speaker 3 (05:55):
It's the best, perfect weather, Yeah, amazing, Yeah, sweatshirt, what
their little crisp in the air, Beautiful foliage, going, getting coffee,
walking my dog around, I think, going what I did
the other day, going, starting off volunteering Bowery Mission. I
love Bowery Mission. I'm a massive fan. I love volunteering.

(06:17):
That's easy to volunteer, can sign up online. Doing that,
walking back up through Soho, going over to the West Village,
going to Santa Bros. Getting the New York Times. I
get my bacon, I get my coffee, I get my cartado.
Sitting there and then from there, just like meeting friends,
popping up town, going to a museum, jumping around, going
to another Sandbro's location. Like that's pretty much my favorite

(06:39):
New York day.

Speaker 1 (06:40):
Oh I love that. It actually sounds perfect.

Speaker 3 (06:44):
You're like, let's do it next week.

Speaker 1 (06:46):
I'm like that, you just made that sound so peaceful.

Speaker 3 (06:48):
A little bit of everything. Yeah, in a farmer's market,
you got to jump in on a farmer's so you
need to be a farmer's market. Monday, Wednesdays, Friday, Saturdays.
That's always good. I never like buy anything, but I
just like walk and then take a video. It's just
everything is so cute. Everything is gorgeous.

Speaker 1 (07:02):
Tell us a little bit more about the volunteer work
that you do.

Speaker 3 (07:06):
So I always have found a way to volunteer. I
can't say it's because I'm like, I mean, maybe I
hope that like, oh my god, I'm just like this
giving person. I volunteer a majority of the time, and
I encourage other people to do it. Honestly, when like
my head's up my own ast like, I'm like, I'm
getting way too overwhelmed by really both things, by like
first world problems. This feels really superficial, And I do

(07:27):
it because sure it's a great thing to do, but honestly,
I feel better, Like I feel better myself, Like you
don't need therapy. You just need to go volunteer. You
need to be around people, people that are actually going
through and you're gonna be like, wow, I have zero problems.
I'm the luckiest person in the world. It like snaps
you out of like anxiety, depression, stress anxiety.

Speaker 1 (07:44):
I feel like it makes you feel so much more.

Speaker 3 (07:45):
In a nanosecond, I'm like a different person. It's literally
like doing a cold bunch. So I started volunteering. I
actually I got arrested when I was like sixteen for
throwing a party at my friend's house. So I had
to do one of those like pre child diversion programs,
like a misdemeanor, and I had to do community service.
So the community service at this place in South Bend

(08:07):
called Saint Margaret's House and it was for women who
suffered like domestic abuse or whatever, you know, had home
and security issues. And I did my served my time,
and then I like really liked it, so I just
stayed and I just kept volunteering, and then from there,
I just kept volunteering because it's like this feels good.
So I've I'm not doing it right now in London,

(08:27):
but I mean La New York. I did School and Wheels,
Border Angels, Bowery Mission. Here City Meals, like it's it's
a City Meals is fabulous, the best organization ever, so amazing,
like delivering meals to elderly people and like true New
Yorkers who knew New York before this like pop up
in the West Village, you know, like and it's it's Yeah,

(08:50):
there's so many organizations in New York. There's so many
different ways to volunteer, and it's like easy, you don't have.

Speaker 1 (08:55):
To you know, done it with my family a couple
of times, especially around like Thanksgiving, yeah, and the holidays.
It's you just it makes you appreciate life so much more. Yeah,
and you're right, all the little things that you stress
about on a daily basis mean nothing. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (09:08):
Yeah, so you can go to a galley, you can
write a check. Those things are great. But again it's
not even because like, oh my god, I just want
to give back. I'm like, I woke up the other day.
I had gone to like two gallons in a row,
and I was freaking out about a dress and I
did like one of the pictures like I think I
look fatness, And then I was like, my head's literally
so far at my I need to like snap out
of it. And then it did, and then I became
like Brint again.

Speaker 1 (09:27):
So just yeah, we're all in our head sometimes. Yeah.
I want to talk a little bit about Real Housewives
of New York. Yeah, you were casted by a mutual
friend and you thought it was a massive joke. Talk
to me a little bit about that.

Speaker 3 (09:41):
Oh my god, I was I had been working in
a tech company for a couple of years and they
got acquired. There was an admin International's company came over
and bought the company or injected four undred millions of
It's like a bunch of us left. So I was
and it was the first time in my life. I
think I was thirty five. It was the first time
in my life that I've been working. So I was
fifteen and struggle at my twenties, but start to establish

(10:02):
my career in my thirties. So it was the first
time in my life that I didn't have to work
or worry about money. Like this is so cool. So
I like properly off to the South of France. I
was like with friends, partying, drinking rose shure. Yeah. I
was like, yeah, like I needed I needed to like
start working on finding another job, maybe in like ad
tech or something. But I was like, Okay, this is
gonna be fun. And then I saw when I was

(10:26):
in the South of France. I saw because at the
time I was on private my Instagram, I had like nine
hundred followers were like actually friends and stuff, and I
saw this DM that was like, hey, we're at the
real housewives, like we'd love to talk to you. And
I was like, decline spam. You know, it's like, you know,
this isn't real. Yeah, I was like, this is a scam.
And then my friend Savanna Svan Angel is like the

(10:47):
best fashion publicist in New York and the world, and
she actually had interviewed with them and went through the interviews,
went to thirty Rock and they wanted her in a
group of friends and she was like, I can't do this.
You know, I think that when they were casting the reboot,
it was casting took like they went through thousands of women,
and it took a really long time because I think
a lot of people were signing up and then being

(11:07):
like I can't do this because no one knew it
was gonna be They're all scared of like what is this.
They're saying it's going to be different, but what is
this really going to be? So she gave my end list.
My name was on it and Jessel was on it. Okay,
and and yeah, they I had a phone I had
like a fifteen minute phone call and they're like, Okay,
we'd like to, you know, do an interview, like have

(11:28):
you seen Housewives? I was like, of course, and They're like, Okay,
we'd like to do like just a one hour zoom
with you that we're going to record, and we want
to do it confessional style, So can you get dressed
up and like do it in your house somewhere. So
I was like sure, and I was like this is fun.
I like doing for like the like the the plot
to tell a funny story. And I was like, I'm
never going to do this. They're never going to cast me.
I'm not like crazy wealthy, I'm not married, like I

(11:50):
live in like a one bedroom in Greenwich she g
and Greenwich Village. I was like, they're not gonna but
this is gonna be really really funny.

Speaker 1 (11:55):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (11:56):
So I put on this like pink cl guy address
and these little Chanelle earrings. I had like a flirty ponytail,
and I like set my camera up but like so
you could see like my fireplace in the background, like
I understand lighting. And I was like, this is cute.

Speaker 1 (12:08):
You're like, this is the vision, this is a vision.

Speaker 3 (12:10):
I was like it looked very like I remember I
had a picture of Kyle Richard or they had sent
me a picture of Kyle Richards in a confessional. They're
like still you understand. I was like, I got this
the depth ratio and whatever.

Speaker 1 (12:19):
So you set up saw Kyle Richards.

Speaker 3 (12:22):
Yeah. They sent me a picture. They're like, you know,
this is what confessionals look like. And I'm like, I
know what they can I know how the confessionals look.
And I put on this like pink cultua like called
Gaya feather dress, these little Schnell earrings had a flirty
ponytail rip three shots in nineteen forty two, and I
just like, get on. I feel like you have to though,
you have to.

Speaker 1 (12:38):
You have to be a.

Speaker 3 (12:40):
Little What am I doing? Yes, because're like what am
I doing with my life? What am I doing? You're
like that thing that I watch now, I'm doing it
like it feels like you're cosplaying, you know. And so yeah,
and Meg Barry was the castinator. She's so lovely, she's great.
But we just talked for an hour and she just
asked me everything and I'm just like on one because again,
I'm like, you have nothing to lose. I'm like, let's
just be It's like word vomit, let's be real. Yeah. Yeah,

(13:02):
I was just like just with like a girlfriend, just
like talking talking talk and I'm like yeah, and then
I was a gage to this guy, and then whatever,
and then this and that.

Speaker 1 (13:07):
It's kind of like how you have to envision it
or imagine it. And I always tell people this, like
you're meeting your freshman year roommate for the first time
and you need to just tell her everything about everything. Yeah,
just put it out there. It's like the first day
of freshman year. Okay, let's get it all out there
because we need to be best friends right now. Yeh yeh.

Speaker 3 (13:26):
I meet it just like immedia, just like be just
be yourself, maybe turn the volume up, you know, a
little bit, a little bit of showmanship, but like, yeah,
think of like a job interview, but you're a little drunk,
so and you're in a in a cocktail dress in
like the middle of the day. So we did that
and I was like okay and it was cute. And

(13:46):
then they called me the next day and they were like, oh,
can you uh, can we jump on another zoom with you?
And I knew that the next step because I'd asked
the van and other people. I knew the next step
was you have to go into thirty rock. You have
to do it in person, maybe a couple. You need
to meet Andy. There's like ten more steps, so can
we jump on another zoom with you? I'm like, yeah, sure.
So I got on a zoom and there's one person

(14:07):
from Shed, went from BRABO and one from NBC, and
that was like a forty minute call talking to them,
talking to them, sharing things.

Speaker 1 (14:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (14:15):
And then the next day they called me and they
were like, we'd like to have you on the show.
And I was like, I haven't even met you, Like,
like what you are you sure? You know, like are
you sure? And then I thought about it for a while.
I remember it was like a really tough decision. It's

(14:37):
crazy with you because you didn't probably have the moment
where you had to.

Speaker 1 (14:41):
Decide whether to do it. I didn't know you didn't.

Speaker 3 (14:43):
Yeah, that's interesting.

Speaker 1 (14:46):
Eight years old. Yeah, So it was more so like
my mom and dad's decision on are we going to
do this as a family. Yeah, And we were so
young at the time that we didn't care. Yeah, I mean,
and my mom put me in acting, modeling all the
things since I was a baby. So when cameras came

(15:07):
around me and my sisters, we thought it was so fun, right,
We were like, this is awesome, every little kid's dream
to be a movie star.

Speaker 3 (15:14):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I noticed that in filming some of
the my castmates, their kids like seem to really like it,
because you think, like, are the kids okay, like you know,
but the kids actually, I think really really seem to
like it. Was it different when you sign up for
the new show, when you had agency, when it was
your choice to do it?

Speaker 1 (15:29):
It was? It was. It was just a different perspective
because meanwhile, I'm sitting here being like, they know everything
about me already. I'm an open book. Everything about my
family's already out there, out in the open. We have
no secrets. But what's crazy on next shen in my seat?
Which was definitely an adjustment for me. It's now into

(15:51):
really my life and my relationship because I've been dating
my boyfriend for six years. He I love him so much,
but so it's like, what are the next steps with
you guys, and what's going on in your life? And
that's been something where yes, I obviously post my boyfriend
on social media, but I've never really talked about the
ins and outs of our relationship besides on casual Chaos,

(16:13):
which I have full editing and full control over. So
it's like a little different where being on a reality
TV show and really sitting there and talking about some
of the hard things that we've gone through, it's just
a little scary. It's a little nerve wracking. Yeah, also
putting somebody in that position, like my boyfriend who has

(16:34):
never done this before in his life. Yeah, so it's
a little it's a little yeah.

Speaker 3 (16:40):
But I think if you have a strong relationship, I
think it's it can be. I don't think it has
to be as dire as sometimes what happens when relationships
and reality TV. And I think it can be fun
because like when I think back and filming with the
people that I truly like, love or care about, and
like it was just like fun.

Speaker 1 (16:57):
It didn't feel like one hundred percent. I think the
people that you surround yourself with, especially you know, and
it's a reality TV show, you have some people that
you don't get along with, some people who maybe you
feel don't have your best intentions. But with him, thank god,
as a partner, he is so supportive and he doesn't
he never like doesn't stop me from doing anything, Like

(17:19):
I live out my dreams to however high I want
to go and he's just there for the ride yea.
And he is so so so supportive throughout everything. Just
for him being in front of a camera was a
little nerve wracking. Yeah, he's like, this is this is
a little scary.

Speaker 3 (17:36):
Yeah, oh wait, do you think you're gonna get married?
I hate when people ask you no, but yes, yeah, yes,
that's fun.

Speaker 1 (17:43):
Yes, it's fun.

Speaker 3 (17:44):
I would say you're a little young, but it's okay.

Speaker 1 (17:46):
No, it's not happening right now. Like I just moved
into my dirty city apartment by myself.

Speaker 3 (17:51):
Oh you guys, don't we don't live so good.

Speaker 1 (17:53):
Yeah, no, I wanted to do that part on my own,
so moved in and you know, maybe within the next
year we'll find a place together and then you know,
step by step. But we're in no rush because we've
been together since we were so young. We've been together
since we were nineteen, so like, yes, we've been together
for so long, but we're also growing together and making

(18:16):
money and just really getting established. There's no rush. Like
when I see these people getting engaged so young, I'm like,
where do you have the money for that? Yeah? Yeah, yeah,
how are you ready for a family? Well?

Speaker 3 (18:29):
Also, you change some when I think back to the
person that I was when I was twenty five twenty,
I'm honestly a different person. I think I changed like
three times. Hope I've done changing now, but I mean,
don't wait too long. I'm also I don't like I
feel like we keep we went from like marry young,
marry young, and then it's like it's fine if it's
not what you want, it's fine, but if it's what
you want. I also think like I wouldn't recommend yeah,

(18:50):
being a bachelor bachelotte for like.

Speaker 1 (18:52):
Eternity, of course, like I would say, like my perfect timeline,
but if it's not even so crazy, I just want
to be in gaged and married before thirty yeah.

Speaker 3 (19:02):
Yeah, and I you know, engagement to engagement.

Speaker 1 (19:05):
I'm not. I don't want to rush. I want to travel,
even though him and I travel all the time. I'm like,
I want to travel. I want to do all the
things before we have kids, like everything.

Speaker 3 (19:13):
When I tell you you're young, like, yeah, I could
like suck that you thought it was like you're young, trust.

Speaker 1 (19:18):
Stay there, have fun. No, definitely, you said on the
Real Housewives of New York that you were the only
one that worked a Real nine to five. Yeah, do
you still stand by that? And do you feel like
any of your castmates maybe got a little upset with
you when you said that?

Speaker 3 (19:35):
Uh? DLLI above, Yeah, I stand by it. I mean
I feel like because of the fact of the time
when we were filming, I was consulting, and I was consulting,
but now I can say the brands. I was consulting
with CEDA, Phil and some Johnson and Johnson brands, and
at the time, per their request, they were like, we
don't want you to share it. No one knew what
the show was, No one knows how it's going to go.

(19:57):
Everyone's like, is this going to become a storyline? You're like,
your friends you don't want to film with you. They're like,
I don't want to be a part of the story.
I'm like, yeah, you're just gonna be in the background.
No one even knows. You just like signed the form.

Speaker 1 (20:05):
And of course, but that's also very normal and very
standard protocol for your job or the people that you're
working with. They don't want to be disclosed on a
reality TV show.

Speaker 3 (20:15):
No no, And also I didn't know what the future
of the show was going to be, and I didn't
know if it would be profitable for me. So I'm like,
I'm not going to mess up a stream of income
for myself, and so like, we don't need to like
talk about we're not going to film there, and I
don't need to like talk about it. Just say, okay,
I'm a consultant. I'm a marketing consultant. And then I
think that I don't know, maybe it was that. I

(20:36):
still say, don't know why. But everyone then got in
their head of like and it's crazy because I was
like in a one bedroom and I'm not I'm not
in like I do vintage. I'm not in like head
to doe designer every day or something like that. But
everyone was like, she can pay her bills and she's
not talking about her work, so she doesn't have like
she doesn't have a real job or whatnot. But then
if you go down the line, I'm like, I don't know,

(20:56):
I'm not going to talk passion. But if you look
at everyone whoever had their brand, like what happened to
all those brands, name one from our first season? Whatever
they were working on or their project or their brand,
things aren't being sold anymore. It's gone away, like I've
never seen them work. And that's fine. I think everyone

(21:17):
you know, we all have like odd jobs.

Speaker 1 (21:19):
Or you do this, you're niche.

Speaker 3 (21:20):
Also you're married, and maybe and if your family has money,
who cares?

Speaker 1 (21:23):
Yeah, and maybe you don't have your parents and you
don't have to work, who cares? But just own that.

Speaker 3 (21:28):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's fine, it's fine. But I think
Jenna had obviously, like you go on LinkedIn you can
see Jenna's career. She has a CV like but I
think I don't know there are people's cvs or whatnot.
But yeah, but I supposely I have no, I have
no idea, but I but I.

Speaker 1 (21:46):
Mean, be proud of it. You get a lot in
your career. Yeah, and you're very intelligent. I mean, come on,
let's talk about it. Let's talk about the Dean's List.

Speaker 3 (21:54):
No, I know I've never like talked about I think
I was just raised that way. Or I think I'm
superstitious where I think that if I boast or something
about work that maybe it would like be taken away
from me.

Speaker 1 (22:07):
I also come true. I know, I totally get it.
You don't want to be too cocky about it. No,
it's yeah, I've always been that way too. You're not
one to brag. Yeah, it's like these are this is
everything that I've accomplished, but I keep it close to
my chest. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (22:21):
Yeah, And I feel like the people that have to
brag about things those are are about money or something.
Those are people that actually don't have it.

Speaker 1 (22:26):
So always been told.

Speaker 3 (22:28):
I've just always worked, and I think I was always scared.
I started working I was fifteen at like a dairy queen,
and then I worked through college. I put myself through college.
I worked two jobs through college, and then I've worked
my entire life, and I just yeah, I think it
was only in my thirties that I started to feel confident. Like,
up until my thirties, when I start working for myself,
I was like I could be working at like a

(22:49):
Starbucks tomorrow. I was always scared that like I was
going to lose a job or like something like that.
So I don't think I had that much confidence until
like when I got cast on the show. I just
had had my first financial freedom at the age of
thirty five in my life, so it was kind of
like new to me. So I don't think I know
to be like I have a job and this is
this is how much I make. But I remember on

(23:09):
one of the rants that I did a text message
I sent to the girls. I did lay out for
them so they all know. I was like, here's my salary,
what's your salary. Here's my bonus, what's your bonus? No
one else has the same tax return I do, Like,
I don't know what the rest of you guys are doing.
But I got very defensive about it. I think that
that's a problem with me. I'm very I get very
like irritated with people, but I keep it in and
then I blow up. Oh.

Speaker 1 (23:30):
It's also you know, to see people talking about things
that they don't know about.

Speaker 3 (23:36):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (23:36):
And also that's also everything that you've accomplished in your life. Yeah,
so it's hard to hear that. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (23:41):
And other people have like they have their family, they
have their husbands, they have their families, they have their children,
they have things. And for me, I was like, I'm
especially that first season, I honestly didn't think. We didn't
even film that much with me. They were always at
like size house or Jenna's house, and I wasn't I'm
gonna go to the allcast. But it wasn't a lot
of one on one. I wasn't allowed to film in

(24:01):
my building. I lived on Eleventh Street between University and Fifth.
My landlord was like, you're the mas marvel He thought
I was marvelous, missus Maisel. And he's like, I don't
want those trucks on my street or you're not. I
don't know what you're talking about, buddy. But they wouldn't
let me film, so we couldn't film in my house.
And I thought that first season because I was like, Okay,
I'm not married. I'm the only one that's like unserious.

(24:22):
I thought I was like a Tinsley Yeah, like with
a little bit of sonia. So I was like, oh,
I'm just there for comittic relief. I'm the drunk idiot,
I'm the single girl, I'm flirty, and that's that. Like
I didn't think. And then when this season came out,
and each episode that I'm watching and more and more,
I'm like, oh, I'm in this a lot, Like I
didn't know that that was gonna happen. And then in
the we had a long time out between the both seasons,

(24:43):
and during that season, during that time out, a lot
of things like changed and like like the Dyna. I
just didn't feel the same anymore between us because again,
like none of us thought that that that like we
just basically I even asked the first season, I was like,
can I just be demoted to a friend of Like
I don't want to have to have this like filming
and going to things, you know. So it was quite

(25:04):
It was really surprising when it aired that Like I
was like, oh, I thought I was on the side,
and like I'm in the mix of everything.

Speaker 1 (25:10):
So I mean when you guys did your promo shoot
that dress that you wore, it was absolutely stunnying. Oh
my gosh, yeah, absolutely stunnying. I mean I was like,
this girl is absolutely beautiful.

Speaker 3 (25:26):
Thank you. It was a vibe. That skirt was actually
ten years ten or twelve years old. I got a
long time ago. And then the beaded top and I
asked them to do my Kim Kardashian had just done
that shoot, so I asked them to do my hair
like that, Like I don't know.

Speaker 1 (25:37):
It was no, it was fun, beautiful.

Speaker 3 (25:39):
All the all the marketing and all the stuff, all
the thing involving the first season I liked, and there
was a lot of like marketing dollars behind that season
two we had like the billboards or whatever, and.

Speaker 1 (25:48):
It was I mean there was also a lot behind it,
you know, and there was a lot riding on it.
There was a lot of pressure. Yeah, obviously OG Real
Houses in New York. They didn't bring back one person, right,
do you feel like that was maybe a mistake on
Bravo to not bring back at least one OG to
like kind of help you guys in the mix of it, Like,
what was it like going into that reboot knowing how

(26:12):
legendary the Real Housewives?

Speaker 3 (26:13):
It was a lot of pressure. It was a lot
of pressure, and I knew that we weren't here. You
can't the beauty of the ogs is that like they
also filmed that in a time and place you can't,
like lu Anne at the with the girl Scouts, like
we live in a different world now, you know, so
so much of those things, even like your mom season,
like it was just it was the time of the

(26:35):
place was perfect. Now society or we've all evolved and
there's TikTok or people are all like emotionally aware.

Speaker 1 (26:42):
It's very different than almost twenty years.

Speaker 3 (26:44):
Fifties, sixties, seventies, every decade changes drastically and especially I
think the last ten years, so you can't recreate that.
So yes, there was a lot of pressure and it
was like a big I didn't. I was like, Okay,
we're never going to be able to like live up
to what or recreate what did. I only think my
only like feedback would have been. I think instead of

(27:06):
getting I always said, sure, if you want like a
new fresh, like diverse, maybe a little bit younger cast,
have that, but have it be like why can it
doesn't need to be real houses of New York City.
It could be like the real Girlfriends of New York
City or something kind of like spin it off versus control, delete,

(27:27):
remove this, and then try to recreate that same thing.
Like in in my working experience, that doesn't work. You know,
that doesn't work, Like so I would have, But it's
funny because now that's kind of what they're doing. Yeah,
So like I would, I would have kept them as
the real Housewives of New York maybe made whatever cast
adjustment adjustments that they need to make because there's a

(27:49):
lot of drama when their show got put on pause.
But I think I would have kept that and then
made an addition like it's like money, like the more
of the marrier. I don't think you need to like
delete something completely removed something from your life and then
put the you know, new thing, unless it's like a
boyfriend then yeah.

Speaker 1 (28:05):
I mean, well with in Real House has in New Jersey. Obviously,
my mom's show was on pause for a long time
and they just got you know.

Speaker 3 (28:15):
But they're keeping they They're all coming.

Speaker 1 (28:17):
Back now, all of them. They're keeping my mom, Dolores,
and my an Melissa. Oh fuck, so them three are
staying good. And then they're bringing in some newbies, so
you know, because you need to have some sort of
like a foundation, and it's not like they're only bringing
in like one or two newbies. So many people were
so sad to see you go. Do you wish that

(28:39):
you were still a part of Real House as in
New York or are you way happier now?

Speaker 3 (28:44):
I think I was like walking away from it. I
did it definitely with a heavy heart, because there's so
much of it that I liked, and there was, you know,
some of my cast members that I liked. I like
the process, I love Brablo, I love MBC. I just
think for me, it got so when something's no longer fun.
I'm like out immediately, whether it be a relationship, a job, anything.

Speaker 1 (29:04):
Well, if it doesn't suit.

Speaker 3 (29:05):
If it doesn't suit you, and it just like it
felt icky. It felt icky during filming. Four weeks into
filming that season, I literally they didn't show but it
was in the Hampton's. I like, rip my mic pack off.
I was like, this is boring, this sucks. There's no
storylines and your gays storylines are showing up every week
saying frinds and you have no proof, Like, get over it.
I was like, be funny, be cool, stop drinking off camera,

(29:27):
be like real, you know, and I like riped my
mic pack off and I went to London and then
I got a phone call I woul't say from who,
and they're like, get your back and keep filming. But
I was like I don't want to, and they're like,
you sign a contract. So I did it begrudgingly, but
I kind of I was kicking and screaming the whole season.
I like just it just didn't feel like you know,

(29:47):
you know, when you're filming, you can tell, you can
totally be present and it's real, but you kind of know.
It's like when you're out at a party with your friends.
You're like, this is a cool party, or this is
a cool event, and a kid's birthday party, like this
is fun. I mean, you know the moment when it's good.
I can relate when the people are just struggling. It's
like struggling oh, and it's like the cameramen are like

(30:08):
come on, and the dp's and everyone's rolling their eyes
and it's just awkward. You know, when you walk away
and you're like I remember the first time that Aaron
and I filmed at Jenna, when we had our first
all cast and Aaron and I she fell through the chair.
I remember leaving that. I was like, this is gonna
be great. Yeah, because it felt like I've watched this
Joe and I'm like, that was real and it was
fun and I enjoyed doing it. I know, I enjoy
watching it back.

Speaker 1 (30:26):
Oh.

Speaker 3 (30:27):
The entire time filming That's season fifteen, I was just
like it was it was miserable. It was pulling teeth
and it just felt I was like, this is gonna bomb,
you know, and they were all like, no, it's fine.
Everybody loves us. This was great. I was like, hey,
we were the hot freshman last year. You do not
like again, workwise, you never rest on your laurels every
single time. You have to like move the move the goal,

(30:48):
polst up, keep trying, keep working on it. Like we
are not in the safe zone. We are now the
boring sophomores. You got to bring it. You gotta bring
it hard and whatever. It's like, no, no, no, it's fine,
We're great. We're gonna like I don't think so, so, yeah,
I was kind of it was it just felt different.
So once something doesn't feel fun anymore, like I'm out.

Speaker 1 (31:15):
But looking back, now, do you have any regrets?

Speaker 3 (31:22):
I think no, no, But I say that like on
the fence probably and I probably should, but no. I
mean with everything in life you do, you do something,
you take a chance, you share, you do whatever. Like
no regrets. I maybe there's some things that I would
do differently or not share, but for the most part,

(31:43):
it's like you live in your learn I try to
not be a big regret person. Yeah, because it's like
that doesn't get you anywhere, you know.

Speaker 1 (31:50):
I think, like it happened, you have to move on.

Speaker 3 (31:52):
It happened, and you move on and you and you
grow and you learn from it, but I think like
Lloyd and you're like, I like should have, would have,
could have or wish that. I think that really I
don't really like loiter there.

Speaker 1 (32:02):
I agree. Do you feel like the show captured your
real personality.

Speaker 3 (32:06):
The first season? Yes, but me but I'm not that
crazy when I drink. I'm not that. Yeah, first season
did a little bit, I but I'm not that like flaky.
I'm not that flirty and that flaky. But yeah, I
think it did.

Speaker 1 (32:26):
I know editing could be unfair sometimes. Do you feel
like you were edited in the right way?

Speaker 3 (32:34):
Well, like, you know, when you signed the contract, it
literally says like we're allowed to mischaracterize, you misrepresent you
did it. Three lawyers look over and they're like, are
you out of her? And only go whatever. So, but
you know, it's not so much that like you can't
sit there and blame like post and the edit.

Speaker 1 (32:50):
It is hard because at the end of the day,
that did come out of it, like the words.

Speaker 3 (32:54):
Did come out of your mind. But the way that
it can just be turned around, taken out of context.
And the problem I think with us too is everything
was always off camera. Like most of the things I
was fighting with I was like I didn't say, like,
I'm like, show me the proof, show me the footage,
and like most of the things were like you said
this off camera, Like but that was your interpretation of
what I said.

Speaker 1 (33:11):
That's not what I said, and that you know. I
honestly hate when people bring off camera things to camera
because then there's nothing to back it and there's no proof.

Speaker 3 (33:20):
So it's so hard.

Speaker 1 (33:21):
It's like off camera things, don't bring it up on
camera or don't have off camera conversation. That was a
huge thing while filming Next Gen really oh yeah, this season,
it was like hard. It's like, do not have off
camera conversations unless you are genuinely like so so so
close with that person that you know you'll be able
to bring it when you film and have a problem

(33:43):
doing it and it's fine, but no, don't maybe talk
to someone that you're not that close with because off
cameras conversations and they always get.

Speaker 3 (33:51):
This construte, they always get misconstrued. I think it's hard though,
because they wanted us to be real friends and like
none of us had met knew each.

Speaker 1 (33:58):
Other, so you also were all trying to build really.

Speaker 3 (34:00):
We're trying to build relationships in real time, so it's hard. Yeah,
and they they're like, Okay, don't talk because you know,
it's really hard then for our viewers to catch up,
and it's hard for the production team to catch up,
and we can't. And then so they were telling us
not to talk to like but it's weird. Then I'm like,
you want us to be friends, we don't know each other,
and we film and then like literally the first scene
that we had for season at Jenna's when Aaron fell

(34:21):
through the chair, that was the first time we were
all in the same room together and nobody knew each other.
We were instructed to say we all knew each other socially,
of course, but like, we didn't know each other. I
love Jenna, like, but I didn't know anyone else, so
and I knew of side through an influencer program, but like,
I didn't know anyone else. So it was then to
like to have this funny moment and then you're like, Okay, bye,
I'll see you guys next week and don't call each other. Yeah,

(34:43):
like what is this big brother? It just.

Speaker 1 (34:46):
Seems not it seems not real.

Speaker 3 (34:48):
So it was kind of like, well, which one do
we do? Do do we actually create friendships or do
we follow the rules and not talk to each other?
But I don't.

Speaker 1 (34:56):
Yeah, with a new season happened, do you ever get
fomo watching it all play out?

Speaker 3 (35:04):
Well, there's season. I think they're filming now. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
I think they're filming now. I think when I watch it,
if I watch it, I don't know if i'd have fomo.

Speaker 1 (35:12):
Do you get fomo now? Just like knowing that things
are happening and you're no, okay.

Speaker 3 (35:18):
I think if I think if Jen and Uba had
come back, I would have fomo. But I don't have
fomo with the current.

Speaker 1 (35:25):
So do you keep in touch with anyone from the
Bravo Yeah, yeah, yeah house in New York Bravo World, Yes,
and I run into a lot of the formers and
like Garcel just messaged me two weeks ago.

Speaker 3 (35:39):
She's super sweet. I have the same manager as Madison
and Siara and stuff and yay, and I'm always like
sending little messages and whatnot. Jessell messaged me a few
weeks ago, really sweet message. She's like, hey, I'm thinking
about you and everything and like so maybe I'll link
up with her. I'm actually gonna see Raquel this evening,
I'm going to an event of hers.

Speaker 1 (35:59):
So yeah, little bit like anyone from the New York cast.
No for my cast, No, no, no, yeah, so my
bygones be bygones.

Speaker 3 (36:10):
It's yeah. I mean I don't have anything against any
of them, and I see little news bits of them,
and I hope that they're doing well and not going
through like messed up stuff. But like, yeah, I think
if I think if it was the original, like our
original cast, I think I would have felt fomo because like,
but now I think there's like new people and I
don't know who those people are. And I love Dressel,
but like I don't, No, I don't have any phone,

(36:30):
if anything. I'm like relieved that, like I'm not it's
rejecting myself to that.

Speaker 1 (36:36):
I know people have called you a flirt.

Speaker 2 (36:39):
Yeah, do you think the show portrayed that a little
better than you are?

Speaker 3 (36:45):
I like biggest sort in high school. I don't think
I was romantic flirting like I flirt with children. I
flirt with old people like I've flirted with my uber
driver here. I'm like, you smell nice, hi poppy, Like
I just it's it's a part of your person. It's
the Midwestern in me.

Speaker 1 (36:59):
It's not intentional. It's more so just like this is
who I am.

Speaker 3 (37:03):
Yeah, but I've done it since I was a kid.
I've done it since I was a kid. Like I've
just been like, yeah, just smiley and happy, and I
don't know, maybe at a young age I realized it
that's a way to like get yourself out of trouble
or something or fine, it's hard. I always like joke
and laughing, giggle.

Speaker 1 (37:19):
And have fun. Has being on the show major dating
life better or worse?

Speaker 3 (37:23):
Being on the show made my life dating life worse? Yeah? Yeah, yeah,
it was like a repellent like any guy that I
was dating obviously maybe that's really cute, but absolutely not.
It made it Yeah like before like dms were great,
everything was fine, but dating no, no, And you also
don't have time, and it's like that's one of the
reasons true, I wanted to leave, Like my priority is

(37:45):
like I want to get married and I want to
have children. And I was like, okay, if I spent
another year like fighting with women that I barely know
and like being stressed out and like marketing shoots and
pr stuff and all this stuff, like I it was
like a year of my life that I it's not
that I wasted it, but I had zero time to
go on one date. I was so stressed and so whatever.

Speaker 1 (38:08):
Like men, you were exhausted. I mean filming also, I
don't think. I think I don't think people people don't understand,
don't get Yeah, even if you have people don't.

Speaker 3 (38:15):
Filming, you're going into it. You're like, you have to
talk to the producer and then you're like, oh God,
what is going to happen?

Speaker 1 (38:22):
And then you're social about it.

Speaker 3 (38:24):
Go yeah, and then you go in and it's two hours,
but it's like the adrenaline and then you're done. And
for me, I didn't have a family or that. And
I think it's good if you have a family or
a husband because they can like you have someone to
talk about things with or maybe you know, you go
to your kids thing and you can decompress. And that's
what the girls would say.

Speaker 1 (38:37):
Me.

Speaker 3 (38:37):
I would like go home alone. And I'm like that
was a lot, you know, so it's it didn't. Yeah,
it definitely affected my dating life and I was and
because it was so stressful, I was like, I'm spending
so much time when doing something that stopped bringing me joy,
and I didn't feel like I was getting any closer
to what I wanted, which was like to meet someone
and to get married and have kids and the irony

(38:58):
is that. Like then, I'd go on dates and people like, wait, house,
are you married? Do you guys? Ask me if I
was married, do you guys? DM me like, wait, are
you married? You're want to show what being married to
this day I have to explain I was the single girl. Yeay,
So what.

Speaker 1 (39:09):
Are you looking for in a relationship now?

Speaker 3 (39:12):
Why don't think you for in a relationship now? Is
someone who is like I like, very manly, man like,
very like elpha and they lead and take like are
in charge, and I like smart men. Uh yeah, someone
who's just very kind, tall, thoughtful and wicked smart. That's

(39:34):
what I'd say.

Speaker 1 (39:35):
Yeah, so are you dating anyone right now? Kind of yeah, yeah, good,
it's don't happy for you, it's no.

Speaker 3 (39:43):
I went on a bender I last fall. I who know,
I was dating someone for a while and we broke
up like last summer, and I was like, oh, it
was a huge mistake, and did it because I really
liked him a lot. But then and I'd reach out
to him and he started dating someone else, like whatever,
So I went, I went on Riot and I changed

(40:03):
my age demo, which I suggest everyone woman does, like
I just turned forty, and you know, I'm always I
was always raised. Like when I was engaged to the
britt to Gideon, I was twenty nine, he was like four.
I always dated older because I was like, oh, the
man's older, the woman's younger. I don't know where I
got My grandma taught me.

Speaker 1 (40:17):
Well, because men mature slower than women, So dating an
older guy maybe your maturity levels.

Speaker 3 (40:23):
Well yeah, I always like just dated over. When I
was in high school, I was trying to do college guys,
I'm just dated older. That's what I did. But now
that I feel old, I'm like, wait, now it's gonna
be like I'm doing freaking fifty year olds. And so
I changed my demo too. Instead of going ten years up,
I went ten years back. So I changed it to
like twenty seven to like thirty seven. Heaven. I was

(40:45):
just any woman that's like I can't find a guy
Da da dada, and is over like the age of
thirty five. Change go lower home run. They're like super
emotionally available. Yeah, super cute, they're go lots of energy,
so much energy. They're very like like emotionally intelligent, like
I have like fifty year old like gazillionaires being like wyd,

(41:06):
what are you doing? And can't like do a tech
who have like thirteen year old kids? Yeah, and these
other ones are like, hi, but don't you have any
dietary restrictions? I'd like to take out to dinner? Where'd
you like to go? We'll find something like they're so
and then they think you're so successful.

Speaker 1 (41:19):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (41:19):
They were like, wow, you don't have a roommate, you know,
like it's very of course. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (41:23):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (41:24):
So I went on a bender and I was just
like a makeout bandit in November, December, January with young
guys like every thirty one, twenty nine, twenty seven. I
drew the one at twenty five because I was like,
this is getting weird. Technically, if I could be your mother,
you know, like when did I get my period? Technically
I could be your mother, Like so yeah, that's the cutoff.

(41:47):
But it was great and then something.

Speaker 1 (41:49):
Like you have to go young, you have to go
young once. Yeah you got yeah the one.

Speaker 3 (41:53):
Hundred percent go or go young all the time, but
then one snuck through out and he's thirty seven and yeah, yeah,
you're I'm forty.

Speaker 1 (42:00):
Yeah yeah, he's not that way.

Speaker 3 (42:01):
Yeah yeah yeah. So he's very sweet, so we'll see.

Speaker 1 (42:03):
I love that he's very sweet. You've been really open
about your past trauma on the Real Housewives of New York.
How are you feeling now and how was it for
that to be so public on the show.

Speaker 3 (42:16):
Yeah, I mean it was horrible and it was just
just a lot of trust was broke. Like at the
beginning of filming last season or whatever my last season was,
they again had said, like the previous season, okay, we
want to sleeper in dating. Everyone wants to sleeper in dating.
So I just was honest and I was like, so
the reason why, Like I have been struggling with dating
and here's why. And they're like, oh my gosh, would

(42:37):
you want to share that? And I was like, I
don't know, can we? And it was similar to all
this stuff with my childhood. It was agreed upon, like
I don't know, I'm willing to film, but like, can
I work with you guys with what I feel comfortable?
And they were amazing about it. First season, like literally
the editors were like are you sure? Are you sure?
And all this sort of stuff. So then I filmed
on scene with my brother in Central Park. But then

(42:59):
it was still on the table, I think up until
even after I think our our final cast strip, and
then I it was like July or something, and they
were like, Brian, are you okay you know with us
including this or whatnot? And I said, look, you guys,
I literally have the text message with Bravo and NBC.
I was like, you guys did such an amazing job
and I trusted you and with you know, last season

(43:21):
with my parents, I'm gonna trust you with this, and
I don't feel like it was respected. So yeah, that's
all say about that.

Speaker 1 (43:31):
Just I mean, they also are trying to create a
great show. Yeah, they're not your friends.

Speaker 3 (43:40):
Right, well some of them actually, I feel like were
and I liked that and I still like them, but producers,
but I think, if you can there was nothing else
going on in our show. Yes, there was no other storylines.
There was literally nothing going on. So there was nothing
going on the whole season.

Speaker 1 (43:55):
Yeah, so it's like, I don't mean that in a
bad way. They're not your friends, but they are gonna
do whatever's best for the show.

Speaker 3 (44:02):
Yeah, it's a commercial.

Speaker 1 (44:03):
Either and might hurt either in theses. Are the producers sweet?
Do you form relationships with them? Of course. I've had
producers on next Gen that I've worked with since I
was eight years old on Real House Is in New Jersey.

Speaker 3 (44:14):
They care about you and like, I love you, but like,
of course not the job that it's a double sword. Yeah,
they have a job to do. But I just think
that there really wasn't anything else. And I think too
that people or they might have thought that I was
like tougher than I am. And I think that and
maybe or maybe they thought that I wanted it more
than I did, you know, because I think a lot

(44:34):
of people if you look at other franchises, the thing
your family people go through, these are extraordinarily strong women
who go through stuff and then get out and immediately fine,
bring the camera. I am not your mother. I'm not

(44:57):
remotely as strong as your mother, you know what I'm saying.
So like, when I go through something like that, I'm
gonna avoid it. I retreat and I will and I
will full, I will bow out and quit, I will
leave like kudos too, and they can use me with
like people like a Kyle or your mom that like, oh,
she'll just like come back and like she'll have her
like what's it called her next arc season and then
did it and it'll be great. And that's what they

(45:19):
told me too, like it's okay. And I told me
people like we can't wait for your next season and
then and you're gonna be back. And I was like no, no, no,
you do that once to me like I'm gone, like
you Julius seizared me on the steps of thirty Rock.
I'm not like, thank you very much. I still love
you all, no hard feelings, but like you don't fool
me once, like I'm not I'm not doing that.

Speaker 1 (45:37):
I mean, you know, as much as being so open
on reality TV, yes it's great, and you know, sometimes
you are being so vulnerable and you're sharing your story
to strangers hoping that it makes a difference, but you know,
sometimes it does hit too close to home.

Speaker 3 (45:56):
I think it's too close to home.

Speaker 1 (45:57):
And also I think I also if your story is
not relayed the way that you want it to be or.

Speaker 3 (46:03):
In a truthful matter, and I think that it's not
I mean, you know, and still like it's not It's
not like you know your mom and Melissa. These aren't
family members. These aren't friends like the Rhode Island girls
of twenty years. These are people that we were just
we were brought together by a casting agent and told

(46:24):
to be friends. So I think I think I made
a mistake of regrets. I think I made a mistake
in thinking that I could share something with people who
they have their own thing on the lines. They don't
want to get canceled. They don't want to be seen
as insensitive. They don't want to be seen as something
that wouldn't be fair for them to be seen as too.
So I think it's just a very tricky situation. And
I think too, even with everything that I've shared to

(46:45):
be vulnerable with, I think it's also just a testament
what my biggest lesson was people still aren't ready for
that conversation, even though it happens like one in three women.
According to the World Health Organization, eight hundred million women
in the world have experienced it. People are fine with
childhood trauma. You aren't find with alcoholism. D UI's going
to jail scamming seniors. People aren't afraid. I mean, they're

(47:07):
not ready to talk about I think women's issues that
affect a lot of women, and when it comes to
violence or assault or anything like that, it makes people uncomfortable.
So I think it was like what I saw play
out was like unfortunate that I think, whether it be
my own cast or society is just not ready for
those conversations and they're not ready to get behind certain subjects. Still,

(47:28):
certain subjects that I think I still make people feel very,
very uncomfortable.

Speaker 1 (47:31):
But yeah, I think that's completely valid. And but you
know that's also certain conversations do make people uncomfortable, and
that's okay, yeah, and that's why it should have there
should be this open door policy to talk about the uncomfortable. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (47:49):
Yeah, And I think when you look back, but.

Speaker 1 (47:51):
Also hard things that you go through are uncomfortable to
spake a worse.

Speaker 3 (47:56):
Yeah, yeah they are. So that's a nature of the game.
But I think in like I think already things feel differently,
and I think in like five years, you know, things
always take time. Like you look back at certain people,
whether they'd be like a whistle will or is the
first people to talk about it, or like, you know,
things that Gwenneth Peltrow said years ago and everyone's now
okay with it, you know, like I think in time,
I think with more time and everything is changing and

(48:17):
society is changing. In this new generation, your generation is amazing.
I think that it will be a different conversation and
I think people will be much more open in the future, hopefully.

Speaker 1 (48:27):
What would you say to girls who have gone through
something similar to this and how would you advise them
to go about it? Talk about it, share their story.

Speaker 3 (48:36):
I think you have to do things in your own time,
and I think share with people who you love and
who are close to you. I think don't shoulder it
on your own. Definitely therapy, support groups, everything, But I
think you have to share with people you trust, you know,
because it's just there's so much there's there's so much heaviness,
there's so much shame that goes along with it. Definitely, know,

(48:56):
share with people aren't your friends. Maybe don't share on television,
but you have to share, get resources and it's so
many people unfortunately have gone through it and you will.
There's there's light, there's light at the end at the tunnel.

Speaker 1 (49:11):
Yeah, but you also by sharing it on TV, I
want you to know that gives you a lot of strength. Yeah,
you also were trying to bring awareness to this, like.

Speaker 3 (49:21):
Oh my god, I mean it's like shocking and scary.
I think even just as many that reached out about
like all my childhood stuff. That's that's like the light
at the end of the like not light as at all,
but it was such a silver lining for me both
seasons anything I shared, like the amount of people that
reached out and are like, oh my god, thank you
so much, and that sort of thing. And I remember too,
like when I was.

Speaker 1 (49:41):
That's when it feels also a lot of rewarding.

Speaker 3 (49:42):
Yeah, because I remember even when I was a kid
going through things, or like I remember once even recently,
I found out that like Scarlett joyants and also was
on footstamps as a kid, and I was like, okay,
and then like it wasn't that bad, you know, like
when you you you feel you know better about I
don't know, really my parents were in jail, you know,
like these things when you know that other people that
you respect, that you love, like you seem to be

(50:04):
doing fine, You're really lovely, Okay, then like it's gonna
I can do it too. You know. It's like you
learned so much about yourself and that there's so many
other people that have gone through the same thing, and
I think seeing them and then seeing them succeed. Yeah, no,
I know, it's what I'm saying, right, But I didn't.
I don't have like a sick like song from like
me singing when I was a kid, but I wish

(50:25):
I did. But yeah, but it's you know, but it's
like so much. Another organization that I volunteered with in
LA dealt with specifically kids who have someone in from
their nuclear family, like a close relative and older brother,
who are in yeah, incarcerated, because that's that's statistics, like
one out of every six child in America has someone
in their close family that's incarcerated. Yeah, and that's so hard,

(50:49):
right going to school talking about it. They missed them.
There's the unknown and like, yeah, so it's always And
I remember this girl that came over she was telling
me and she was spray tanning me at my Fanca
house and Beverly Hills. I was like, my parents we're
in jail. She's like, your parents are a jails. Like yeah,
She's like, that's your audi ouce. I was like, yeah,
that's fine, you can overc up everything. And she's like,
can you volunteer in this organization that helped me? And
I was like, yeah, sure, but it's good to I

(51:11):
think it the more you share at the end of
the day, I think the thing that connects all of
us is like when we think we're alone, or when
we think no one else gets it, you would be
shocked and surprised so many people I know from different
walks of life. I think the secret is that everyone
is actually we're all going through the same thing. I
think that's the secret. Everyone's going the amount of like
hurt and pain that I have felt, you have felt.

(51:32):
And I think the second that they don't understand me,
well they've had this and they don't get it, and
we've all we all have same insecurities, same fears, the
same depth of pain, the same highs of happiness. I
think once we realize that, then it's like, Okay, we're
all actually like going through the human Yeah, we're going
through the same thing. My thing is on as worse,

(51:54):
worse than yours. Yours isn't better than mine.

Speaker 1 (51:56):
It's just yeah, and everyone handles things differently, and yeah,
everyone is entitled to their own story and what they
have gone through. Yeah, nobody's life is perfect. Nobody's life
is perfect. What is next for you now that you're
done with the show? What is burn up to today?

Speaker 3 (52:11):
You know what I'm actually doing? I have so many
i's having dinner with my one of my close guy
friends last night and I was like, I'm taking it
day by day and I don't have a plan, Like
I'm in between New York and London now I think
I I'm going to be back in New York this
fall and winter. What I've been trying to do unsuccessfully
for like eight or nine years now, I just I

(52:33):
want to get married and have kids. Like I love working,
I can do any job, I can pat my head,
ground my stomach, but I wanted to be a mom
and a wife, Like that's all I wanted to do
since I was little. So I just need to like
stop running around like a chicken with their head cut off.
Stop traveling doing this and doing that and going here
and doing things. And I just need to my friends

(52:54):
just nodding at me in the corner. He's my friend
of eighteen years, but like yeah, I'm just like I'm
like I'm to take a time out and focus, like
whatever there's like an adderall or like a riddlin for
like someone who's a commitment fo. I need to take
it and just like focus on what I really really want.
So I'm fortunate that I'm in a little bit of
a position, hre I have a little bit of flexibility,

(53:15):
or I don't have to turn around tomorrow and like start,
you know, really really focus or like focus so hard
on a nine to five. Or I can consult, I
can be vom different projects and invest and do things.
So I think it's time. I don't need to prove
anything to anyone anymore. I don't care anymore about like
career stuff. I just want to be starting, yeah, start
a family, start traditions. I want to be a grandma,

(53:36):
Like I want to be a nana, a drunk nana.
So I need to get on that. So that's kind
of my focus. So hopefully well manifesting this. Thank you, love,
thank you, this was great, Brad.

Speaker 2 (53:46):
Thank you so much for coming on Casual Chaos My
pleasure