June 6, 2026 • 36 mins
The Bachelor that knows a thing or two about a switcharoo, Jason Mesnick, joins our very own Bachelor fan favorite Daisy to answer your Greek Life dating questions!
This will be the most dramatic Dirty Rush ever!
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to Dirty Rush, The Truth about Sorority life with
your hosts me Gia Judice.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Daisy Kent, and Jennifer Kessler. Welcome back to another episode
of Dirty Rush. I'm Daisy Kent, and today I'm joined
by Jason Mesnik. We're here to talk all things dating
and to find out will sorority situationship survive this summer.
Hey Allison, Hello, it's nice to meet Nice to meet
(00:31):
you too. We heard that you have like a story
about like an abroad breakup or something along that line. Yeah, okay,
fill us in what happened? And where did you Where
do you go to school?
Speaker 3 (00:43):
Did you say go to cal Poly?
Speaker 4 (00:45):
Slow?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
And I'm in San Luis Obispo right now too, But
I'm from San Francisco.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Okay, cool, awesome.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Yes, But but the summer before I went abroad, I
met this guy also from the same school is me too,
And I ended up clicking very well with him, and
just like I feel like I was treated kind of
very nice, just being like taken out to dinner, just
on nice things that like I felt like, Wow, like
(01:13):
this is like a really good guy, and I feel
like I was in such a weird situation because it
was so difficult because I was also leaving for abroad
and I was studying abroad in Italy, which I was
really excited for, but it was like hard to move
forward with that situation with him just because of the
distance and like how it would play out, because I
(01:34):
think I was really excited to just become very independent
abroad and I feel like just gaining a lot of
new experiences. But at the same time, I did continue
wanting to talk to this guy and see where things go.
And it was I was studying abroad for four months
and we ended up trying to keep in contact a
little bit, but it ended up not really working out
(01:56):
like as I wanted it to, because I just think
a lot like changes over four months, and yeah, and
then I came back from abroad and it just ended
up just like being different, which was kind of frustrating,
but also like I was happy kind of about like
where I was at in my own life when I
came back, and just kind of how things played out too.
Speaker 5 (02:18):
What changed when he came back.
Speaker 1 (02:21):
So like he had asked me if I was talking
to anyone abroad, and I like really like I wasn't
like there was one new guy that I did meet abroad,
and I was like honest with him and I told
him about that. And then as soon as I said that,
like I met another guy there, but like I'm still
it's like he lives in Italy, Like nothing's gonna happen
(02:42):
after that. I think things started to change when I
said that, which kind of sucked.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
So do you think or into it kind of than
you were?
Speaker 1 (02:52):
I don't, I honestly, like I maybe he was, and
I think I could tell during that summer it was
definitely like in his head about how things would possibly
change when I did go abroad, and like I was
thinking about that a lot too, but I was also
very excited to have that experience at the same time
that it was really it was hard to prioritize both
(03:14):
things in my life.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Oh, definitely, like you were like probably having the time
of your life and like doing all these new experiences.
So I honestly, I think that's great that you went
and did that and weren't like, especially if you weren't
like together together, that you didn't have that back in
a way, and.
Speaker 6 (03:31):
It's not like that you let him hold you back
at all, which is awesome because like it's like that
opportunity I can almost guarantee, like when I traveled through
Europe years ago, Like it's some of my favorite memories
where you're free, you meet people, there's nothing holding you back,
and it sounds like you really let that happen. And
if he was and if he was ready for it,
maybe just he wasn't ready, like mature enough to really
(03:52):
understand like she needs this for herself and if I like,
if he was mature enough, he probably would understood it.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
I feel like distance is difficult when it comes to situationships,
especially over the summer. Like I've had a few where
it's just it's difficult to move on when you like
are in the same area over the summer, but then
you leave different places after. It's just it's hard, I
feel like sometimes to move forward with just like what's
to come with the distance, especially when you're starting off
(04:23):
a relationship too.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
Yeah for sure, So are you dating anyone now? Are
you single?
Speaker 1 (04:29):
I'm not dating anyone right now. I am single. I'm
really really excited to just graduate college and kind of
just to see what comes next.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Well, thank you so much for coming on, and I'm
so excited for you in this next chapter.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Thank you, Thank you so much, Daisy and Jason. I
appreciate talking to you guys.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Hey, Sarah, Hi, it's nice to meet you.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
You.
Speaker 5 (04:56):
Where are you at.
Speaker 7 (04:58):
I'm actually in Madrid.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Oh my gosh, so you're a broad right.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
Now, I'm abroad, but I move home tomorrow.
Speaker 5 (05:05):
H How long are you there for Madrid?
Speaker 7 (05:07):
I was here six months.
Speaker 5 (05:08):
Do you have the best time ever?
Speaker 3 (05:10):
It was awesome.
Speaker 4 (05:10):
It was the best time in my life.
Speaker 7 (05:12):
So the issue is when I moved abroad, I met
I met somebody like pretty early on in the experience,
and he's actually from here, and yes, and it was
you know, it's been going great and really hit it off,
like honestly hit it off with him more than I
(05:33):
have it to anybody at home, which is really crazy
because he's from Madrid, like you know, like born and
raised here, and but we've like, I mean, I move
home tomorrow, So it's like, what do I do. We
haven't set like a clear expectation, Like there's honestly been
no expectation, and how do I If I had been staying,
(05:54):
like with more time, I almost feel like, you know,
things would have progressed and like I just don't know.
Speaker 3 (06:01):
Whether to leave it here bring it home with me.
Speaker 5 (06:07):
I was like, this is like a story. This is
not a relationship. This is like what you see on
TV really that.
Speaker 4 (06:12):
Post grad Like who knows?
Speaker 7 (06:14):
Like I don't, I don't really know, but it's kind
of it's kind of sad, like going back and having
met someone so great.
Speaker 8 (06:21):
So are you guys?
Speaker 2 (06:23):
What time is it there? Like are you gonna have
you said goodbye? Or are you gonna see him?
Speaker 7 (06:27):
Like no, so no, I'm going to see why. I
have all day tomorrow, I like go home at like
three am. I fight six am the next day.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
So, so have you kind of been so you've been
to there like six months? So have you like basically
been together like six months or like five months or
like more like four and a half.
Speaker 7 (06:45):
Like I meant him kind of like I would say,
like a month and a half two months into this
and I don't know, it's been so long, but I.
Speaker 4 (06:54):
Don't know it's going so well, but like what do
you do?
Speaker 6 (06:57):
Like And it's probably more intense, like I felt like
when your novel it's more intense, like when you meet somebody,
like your time is so limited and it gets more
intense than.
Speaker 5 (07:05):
It would be at home.
Speaker 7 (07:07):
Yeah, because like there's no like there's no like endpoint,
there's no limit, like you're just home. Like, yeah, he's
been known that I'm supposed to only only be here
like till the beginning of June, and so now we're
kind of like here and it's like what do you do?
Speaker 2 (07:22):
I'm like, obviously you're going home tomorrow. So I'm like
I feel like almost once you get home, like see
how you feel?
Speaker 7 (07:31):
Right, I mean, like what else do you doo?
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Ever been?
Speaker 7 (07:36):
Like no, he's only been he's only been to New York.
He's never been to California.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
Your parents know about him.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
I've like told my mom.
Speaker 7 (07:46):
My mom and I are really close, like she knows everything,
but like yeah, she's like kind of just like write
it out, see where it goes? Yeah, talk to him maybe,
Like I mean, who knows. Like I had a friend
actually who and abroad once and she actually moved back
to like be with the guy she met, which is
(08:07):
kind of a crazy story, and I'm like could that
be me? But like I don't know, I don't I
don't know if I see myself moving back to Europe,
Like that's just so crazy to think it's only like
a year away.
Speaker 6 (08:18):
But how I just keep everything open, like it's such
like it may or may not work out, like who
the heck knows, but having that experience, you know, I've
got friends that met met years ago traveling abroad and
they're still married, you know, and they've.
Speaker 5 (08:34):
Lived overseas and they've lived locally.
Speaker 6 (08:36):
I'm just wondering, like, is he the same age as you, like,
same kind of experience in dating.
Speaker 5 (08:40):
And all that.
Speaker 4 (08:42):
He's a little bit older.
Speaker 7 (08:43):
I mean he graduated about two years ago, so he's
just been working, but like same age, like range, slightly different,
but yeah.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
Well that's good.
Speaker 6 (08:54):
I mean just like as long as he's not like
some young like he hasn't dated much, you know that
that be different, but like somebody who's got experience and.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
You're clipping so well, yeah, totally.
Speaker 6 (09:05):
I just wouldn't shut Like if you feel like long
distance is too hard and you've done it for several
months and like it's just like breaking your heart, but
I don't know why not keep an open mind, but yeah,
is that what you want?
Speaker 7 (09:20):
Yeah? Totally, Like I've never like hit it off with
someone like so great like him, like I feel like
dating culture is like so different back at home that
it's been so fun to see like the way like
guys like like in my age group act here, and
so like it's been like I don't want to like
just like discredit it and be like, oh, that was
(09:40):
just like a broad fun because like you know, like
you miss all the shots you don't take.
Speaker 6 (09:45):
I think you got the right attitude. I think I
think you keep on going with that attitude. And what's
the worst The best case scenario is awesome. The worst
case scenario is I gave it a shot and it
didn't work out perfectly, but I still gave it a shot.
Speaker 5 (09:58):
Yeah, what's that saying? Like you regret things that you
don't do? Yeah, Like I don't know.
Speaker 6 (10:03):
I like, I think you've got such a good head
on your soulders thinking about this thing and when you
get home, like, have you have you thought about for
sure staying in touch or not?
Speaker 7 (10:14):
Yeah, I definitely, Like I mean I want to and
like I hope that's like where his head's at obviously,
and like he says it is so like I just
hope that like that's just how it goes and that
you know, distance doesn't just like completely like kind of
break what we like have built this far, like right
off the bat, you.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Know, yeah, definitely. I'm sure it'll be difficult like going
back home too, but I feel like it'll be a
good way to like figure it out. And like what
Jason was saying, just like stay open to like that
and like other like opportunities and people too. I feel like,
and you never know.
Speaker 5 (10:54):
Yeah, you never know at all. Like it's like you
never know. It's the best.
Speaker 6 (10:58):
Like that feeling that you're having is so good and
so intoxicating.
Speaker 5 (11:02):
Just see if it keeps on.
Speaker 6 (11:04):
Going, like and knowing that he's you know, not you know,
two years younger than you, and he's got dating experience,
he probably knows more about what he wants versus a
younger guy, which is awesome. Yeah, and I think if
you do too, then I mean I think listen, listen
to mom.
Speaker 5 (11:22):
Mom nailed it.
Speaker 7 (11:23):
I mean, is she's saying, go for it, and he's yeah, Like,
have you guys talked about like would he I mean,
I know, you said you're still like figuring out and
so like would he ever be open to like moving
to the US?
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Has he ever mentioned anything like that?
Speaker 7 (11:38):
No, like we've never gone like that far as like moving,
and like he knows I have like one year of
college left. So I feel like that kind of like
stops any sort of like right now conversation from happening,
because like what is he going to do? Move to
my college town? But like I like he knows like
I love Madrid, Like I'm totally open to like coming back,
(12:00):
Like I can't wait to come back and visit Madrid,
like things have like that have been said, and like
he's ever been to California, like he would love.
Speaker 3 (12:06):
To go see what it's like. And so like those
types of.
Speaker 7 (12:08):
Conversations are like lead me to be like a little
bit hopeful that it like you know, means something, but
like as of like long term, it's like it's not
that it's not in that stage yet.
Speaker 6 (12:21):
Just be hopeful, and I'm actually going to I'm actually
going to Barcelona in like three weeks.
Speaker 7 (12:25):
Give me his address, Yeah, thanks, Yeah, let me know
what you think about him?
Speaker 6 (12:32):
Yeah again, Like just I know it's it's like the
mentality is so easy to get kind of pessimistic because
like you're going home and you're like it's over and
I got to go back to school and I'm going
to miss him.
Speaker 5 (12:44):
But I think if you flipped it on its.
Speaker 6 (12:45):
Head and and you had a conversation with yourself what
we're thinking or where your girlfriends would say, and if
he's actually a really good dude, like why not?
Speaker 2 (12:58):
Yeah, yeah, well I'm so glad you had such a
good experience. And honestly, yeah, like what Jason said, just
stay open and I'm excited for you. There's I feel
like there's like no like bad outcome of this. Honestly.
I mean, it doesn't work out, you meant a great
person abroad and maybe you guys can stay in content.
Speaker 5 (13:17):
And yeah it works out, it's awesome.
Speaker 6 (13:19):
If it doesn't, like you learned like it, it won't
feel great, but like you'll be you'll be happy you went.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
Through it like you experienced abroad to the fullest an experience.
Speaker 7 (13:31):
Yeah, it's a pretty great story if anything.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Well, it was great to meet you, and I'm wishing
to thank you guys.
Speaker 4 (13:38):
It was so great for me.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
You guys, hey me, Hey, Okay, so your boyfriend you
(14:00):
guys met at school then and then how did you
like go from a situationship to a relationship.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
So it was actually an interesting path. I think a
lot of my past experiences with the situationships kind of
paved the way for how I acted in this relationships
last situationship. For a while in the beginning, I wasn't
sure what he wanted, and we started off as friends.
We're actually friends for like about a year before we
started becoming a thing, if you want to call it that.
(14:31):
And so we were talking for a while, but we
knew we were going abroad, so it's kind of like
an unspoken like what's happening, like I don't know, and
then we went into break. We still talked over a break,
over a winter break before we went abroad and everything,
but it was very unknown. And then when we got
to abroad, I think he just kind of wanted to
(14:53):
see what was going on, not more not in like
a way of why I want to explore their options,
but more in a what's it going to look like?
Are we going to see each other a lot? We're
in a whole nother continent. And then once we kind
of knew that it was going to work and that
we still enjoyed really seeing each other, he asked me
to be his girlfriend.
Speaker 5 (15:10):
Were you excited? Really?
Speaker 3 (15:11):
Yeah, I'm really excited. It's been really great, and like
we went on two trips together. Yeah, we went on
two trips together. I went to Lisbon and Minorca with him,
so it was like really dreamy and awesome.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Oh that's so fun.
Speaker 5 (15:24):
But what's it like now back at home.
Speaker 3 (15:26):
Well, he's from the Bay, so he's more near Berkeley,
and so it's kind of hard, I mean because we've
only been dating for a small amount of time, so
it's like a content adjustment where it was an adjustment
abroad and now it's adjustment being back at home. And
it's been good. We're good at communicating, but I'm kind
of in that limbo where I'm like, I'm not gonna
(15:48):
see him for a few weeks and then I'm gonna
see him kind of rarely during summer. But so far,
it's good and he's been great at communicating. So it's
been really easy.
Speaker 5 (15:56):
And you guys are both super committed.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
Do you think, Yeah, I'm and I am. I think
he is as well. Yeah, it's a it's a great start.
I mean we had a kind of slow burn into
I think we're talking for like four months before we
actually dated, so I think we're pretty committed.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
Also, I feel like, I mean, this could just be
like my like take on things, but I feel like
a lot of times when people go abroad, like and
they're in like a situationship or like a relationship, like
the people everyone's kind of like, oh, I like, I
just want to have fun and like do me like
abroad and stuff. So I feel like that you guys
like actually came closer together is like very telling.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
Yeah, I know, it's actually I think it's really cute
because I mean, of course my friends are like me,
are you sure you want to do this? Like Spanish men?
You know, I was like ah, but I think it
made us like stronger and closer because it's like we're
doing such a big life event with each other. But yeah,
it was great.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
That's amazing.
Speaker 6 (16:50):
So how do you guys keep make sure that, like,
you guys are on the same page with everything, because sometimes,
like I know that when I did a dated a
girl while ago obviously long this, there's some jealousy like
do you guys are you open about all that stuff?
Speaker 5 (17:03):
Like how do you guys deal with it?
Speaker 3 (17:05):
Yeah, we're pretty open. I mean I'm a psychology major,
so I find it kind of easy to communicate and
express my feelings. I mean, it's not the easiest thing
to do for every person, but for me, I know
kind of the importance of that, Especially with my last situationship,
it was really deep and something that ended up happening
(17:28):
where I kind of lost trust in like all men,
to be honest. So it's been kind of not a struggle,
but it's been a journey for me to be able
to develop the trust and like appreciation for another person
in a romantic sense. But yeah, it's sorry, it was
question I really got on.
Speaker 1 (17:48):
Ah.
Speaker 6 (17:49):
No, No, I'm just wondering, like how you guys deal, like
like you're saying, you're like, I'm a psych major too,
so I always thought it was pretty pretty easy for
me to communicate. But sometimes doesn't matter guy a girl
that they up and you can't deal with harder questions
or some of this stuff.
Speaker 3 (18:04):
Yeah, totally. I feel like, especially since we started out
as a situationship, it's kind of like, I don't know,
there's kind of like a barrier where it's like how
much can I be myself? Like does this guy really
like me? We've been dating for I mean, we've been
talking for so long, before dating. But I think he's
a very naturally trusting person and I find it pretty
easy to trust him. He's been very transparent about everything.
(18:29):
I mean, I can't fully speak to that, I guess
because I don't know what he has going on in
his life at all times twenty four to seven. But
he's in my experience, been very open. And I'm someone
who's kind of an open book too, and I feel
like it's very necessary to have open communication with a partner,
especially when now we're like long distance or medium distance
(18:51):
or whatever. So it's kind of been surprising because I
feel like in my past experiences men aren't very good
at that, But I think I find someone who actually
is like really willing to put in the time and effort,
which is kind of surprising, but not about my own
but just like like in comparison to my last experiences.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Well, I'm so happy for you and that this is
like working out for you, And it sounds like you
found a really really great guy and that you guys
got to like travel with the world together. That's incredible.
Speaker 6 (19:20):
Yeah, and you have the same energy you have, like
you know how people like either one person's chill, when
a person's gut more energy or both people match.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
Like you're like, go, yeah, I mean I would say
he's a little more chill than me. I think he's
more outgoing. Actually sometimes I feel like I can like
kind of step back into my little corner. But he's
very outgoing, but he's less like bubbly, if that's what
you're asking. But I think it creates a balance because
he's super talkative and actually most of the time I'm
(19:50):
not very talkative. But it's great because I feel like
we kind of switch off on like oh, I have
a lot of energy today, or like I want to
talk a lot and it's like, well today I want
to listen. So it's like it's perfect. It's like a
it's a great balance.
Speaker 6 (20:04):
I only have one piece of advice, not only because
it's back kind of a joke, but anytime I'm in
a conversation with my wife now and I'm like, nah,
don't worry, I'm a psych major, Like I already know
this stuff, She's like, all right, a psych major is
really going to help you with our relationship. So just joking,
but realistically, I think I think it's awesome. I think
you found somebody who's great and just keep an open
(20:25):
mind about everything and keep trusting.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
I appreciate that, and I mean, yeah, being a psych
major doesn't really apply to every situation because it's very
varied and like relationships are different, but yeah, I agree
and thank you.
Speaker 6 (20:39):
No, it just gives you a different perspective on things,
and I do think that's helpful in any relationship.
Speaker 2 (20:46):
Well, thank you so much for coming on me. Yeah,
thank you.
Speaker 3 (20:49):
It was really really fun and new experience.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
For me as well. Yes, okay, well you have a
great rest of your day, you too, Thank you great.
Speaker 8 (20:58):
Bye.
Speaker 4 (21:13):
Hi guys.
Speaker 8 (21:14):
Hello, how are you?
Speaker 2 (21:16):
I am good? How are you?
Speaker 4 (21:18):
I'm good?
Speaker 2 (21:20):
Are you in school? Are you graduated?
Speaker 4 (21:22):
So I'm a junior.
Speaker 9 (21:24):
I go to Cal. I'll be a rising senior next year.
So I'm kind of over in Westwood right now, just
for the summer, which is really nice.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
So it's been great.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
Are you dating grad?
Speaker 9 (21:38):
So I'll give like this like shortened feel pretty much,
but basically so little context is that when I was
a freshman at Cal, there was a junior at Cal.
We were both athletes and so, like you have each other,
he played baseball. I'm on track and I was kind
(22:00):
of like he's older, like he has no idea who
I am, Like he honestly shouldn't.
Speaker 4 (22:03):
I'm a freshman. That would be kind of weird.
Speaker 9 (22:05):
And by the end of that year, his junior my
freshman year, he entered the transfer portal and went to UCLA.
We're both from the same hometown, so it was kind
of just this thing of like, okay, like I know
of you, like we follow each other on Instagram, like
but like I don't talk to you, like I've never
actually said hi to you whatever, not up until this
year in February, he like likes when of my Instagram
(22:30):
stories and I was just like, oh my god, whoa
Like Hi, that's really random, Like I know you, but
I don't know you. And I remember I liked one
of his stories and then he liked this like old
archived post of mine and I was like this is
just stupid. Now, like now we're just playing phone tag
and I literally just DMed him and I was like, hey,
figured i'd reach out, like if you're gonna like a
(22:50):
post that's like two years old of mine, like I'm
going to reach out. He's like, oh, yeah, like you should,
like please let me know, like when you're in SoCal,
like I know you're from Orange County. Like if you're
ever like visiting like UCLA, like i'd love to take
you out, like I.
Speaker 4 (23:03):
Love to take you out drinks.
Speaker 9 (23:04):
And I was like, yeah, sure, like i'm in season
right now, like you're also in season, so like I
don't know, but like i'll let you know.
Speaker 4 (23:10):
He's like, okay, can I remember.
Speaker 9 (23:11):
I was like, yeah, here's my number, texting like twenty
four to seven like all moments of the day for
like the next month. And then I was like, oh,
funny enough, like I'm going on spring break and I'm
gonna be coming home and he was like, oh my god,
Like if there's a day that works for you, like
I would love to like take you out to dinner,
like whatever you want to do. He's like, I can
(23:34):
take you out to drinks. And I was like, no,
I'm not twenty one, so we can't do that.
Speaker 4 (23:37):
And he's like that's.
Speaker 9 (23:38):
Okay, and we go out and we get dinner in Brentwood.
Speaker 4 (23:43):
It was really fun.
Speaker 9 (23:44):
It was just like really good like banter and just
like kind of like talked a lot from before, so
it was like, wait, I've been talking to you a
lot already and like I know you, but I don't
know you, and it was just like it was very
like seamless and easy and it was great. And then
we kept talking for a while after and like honestly,
like up until now, when I like came back home,
(24:05):
it was just kind of like all this like are
you in La, Like are you back yet, like like
just kind of like wanting like updates of just like
went because you knew I was gonna be back home
in LA and so but now it's kind of just
this thing of like, okay, well, like this is like
my first week back, and I literally think I'm seeing
him later today, which is hilarious. I think I'm going
(24:28):
out to dinner with him. I just haven't confirmed if
I want to yet or not.
Speaker 5 (24:31):
Why would you want to?
Speaker 4 (24:33):
I don't know.
Speaker 9 (24:33):
I'm more so just like I'm really tired right now
and like we'll see like kind of like I'm also
like supposed to do something with like family later too,
but my parents were both like if you want to
go on like a date, you can go.
Speaker 4 (24:46):
But I'm like, like I.
Speaker 9 (24:46):
Feel bad, but it's more so just an odd thing
of like I just turned twenty one he's twenty three
turning twenty four, like he was a fifth year like
this year while I was a junior. It's like I'm
going back up to Berkeley, and like he's gonna like
I don't know, figure out what he's gonna do with
his life, like graduating, like starting real life kind of stuff.
Speaker 4 (25:09):
So I'm more so just like I don't really know
like what to expect over.
Speaker 9 (25:13):
The summer of just like should this just be like
a summer fling or if I should like think about
having like higher expectations. Like I feel like I'm kind
of the person where I'm just like I love my life.
Speaker 4 (25:25):
Everything's great for me.
Speaker 9 (25:26):
My friends are great, my family's great, school is great,
running is great, works great to where like as long
as those things are like in line for me, like
I just like become just like more emotionally available. And
I'm not like a like very like reserved or like
closed off person. It's more so just like I don't
want to get my like hopes up or like put
in more if like it's not gonna be anything crazy.
(25:49):
So that's kind of my situation in the shortest that
I could tell it.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
I feel like you need to go out more dates with.
Speaker 6 (25:55):
Him, Yeah, don't put don't put a wall, Like I
feel like that there may be a wall that you're
putting up before you even know, Okay, don't you do
you feel like is there a reason for that, like
any other relationship that maybe didn't work out or and
I get like like the opposite of a college athlete,
like seriously, but at the same time, I know how
focused you have to be for my friends. But are
(26:18):
you curious about are you? But you're curious about him right, I'm.
Speaker 9 (26:21):
Definitely curious about him because I'm like we got along great.
He's like a really like really great guy. And like
the other thing that like kind of sold me a
lot too, is like my older friends at cal who
like were at school with him when he was still there,
like all just had like wonderful things to say about him,
and all of them were like really like happy and
shocked that we were talking. And they're like like my
girlfriends too that like knew him, and they're like you
(26:43):
need to keep going out with him, Like he's awesome,
he's so funny, like he's so sweet, and I'm just.
Speaker 4 (26:47):
Kind of like, oh my god, Like no, it's happening,
you know, it's like, oh my god, like I have
a crush, Like no, like.
Speaker 5 (26:54):
I don't you know yourself.
Speaker 4 (26:56):
Oh my god, Like I don't want to do that
right now.
Speaker 8 (26:59):
No, that's good.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
I feel like it's good.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
I feel like it's good.
Speaker 9 (27:03):
I feel like the only thing that like makes me
have walls up is just like wait, it's such a
like the thought of like it working out is like, yeah,
it's great, Like he could be a great guy for
a to work out with. I think more situational wise
of just like oh my god, like I have to
like go back to school, like I have to go
back up to Nork Hall eventually and like do senior year,
(27:24):
and like it's it seems like kind of just like
different ends of like oh I wish I met you
like earlier. I wish we were like the same age,
like at like the same point like in college with
like graduating, but like it's so different ends of the
spectrum to where that's where I'm like, oh my god,
is it like even makes sense kind of thing.
Speaker 5 (27:43):
Are you a planner?
Speaker 4 (27:44):
Yes, yeah, planner.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
I feel like there's never a right time, Like I
feel like always in the past when I've been in
relationships like I'm always like, oh, well, this won't work
out because this, and like I'm going back for the summer,
like random things like that. I always like overthought and
I think, like I feel like just going for it
is like the best possible outcome because then either you
find out it works or you find out it doesn't work,
(28:08):
and then you won't spend all this time like wondering.
Speaker 6 (28:10):
Right yeah, I mean I just wonder. You've got so
many good things in your life, right are you? Almost
in some way like I don't want to spoil what's
Like everything's good.
Speaker 9 (28:18):
I feel like I'm like everything's good to where like
that's like itself what makes me like emotionally available just
like wait, like I'm really happy right now, Like yeah,
I can like show up and like be great for
another person if it's like kind of reciprocated as well.
Like I feel like I'm pretty always good with like
balancing my people out, like making sure that like you know,
(28:40):
like if they're giving a hundred, I'm giving a hundred
like vice versa, and like keeping up with those relationships.
Like I there's nothing that I hate more than when
people are like I'm busy or like I can't I'm
busy or this, and that. It's like, no, you don't
even know what busy is. Like we none of us
know what busy is. We're all like young twenty year olds,
like you're not busy. So I feel like in that
part of like going into like next year, of like
(29:03):
me having enough time and like me being able to
like manage everything that I've going on like really well.
But then like on his end, he's just like, oh wait,
like I don't know what I'm doing with my life
and I'm graduated and I need to like figure out
like how I'm not going to be living at home
for the rest of my life.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
It's like I'm here and.
Speaker 9 (29:21):
I'm good, but like, I don't know what you're doing.
Speaker 6 (29:25):
But the one benefit I think of both of you
guys being college athletes, is you both understand. He'll know
your I mean, I don't like it's a different training
totally getting, but he'll know the busyness that it takes
to do. And I think that's an interesting card to
play at first, Like if he doesn't respect that, I'm
not saying, maybe he's like, go, do you you're the best?
Be the best version of yourself. But if he didn't
(29:46):
respect that, that'd be a red flag right away. But
if he does respect that and things end up being good,
and what if he fits into your perfect puzzle?
Speaker 5 (29:55):
Mm hmm yeah, if there he's a perfect puzzle.
Speaker 4 (29:58):
Right, Yeah, I know. It's just it's tricky. It's very tricky.
Speaker 5 (30:03):
You're scared.
Speaker 9 (30:04):
I'm a little scared because I'm just like, oh, like
you know, like everyone in like ourh has been down
this road so many times of just like it's again
like oh my god, I have a crush, like someone
killed me right now because I don't even want to
go down this road.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
Well, I think you should go on the date and
then you can fill us in.
Speaker 5 (30:21):
Okay, wait, yeah, you should definitely go.
Speaker 4 (30:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 9 (30:25):
It's almost like, oh, like he's offering like a nice dates.
That's why I'm kind of like, oh, like I might
need to. I feel like it's better than if it
was like a oh, like come over and whatever.
Speaker 4 (30:34):
It's like, wait, no, I'm not doing that.
Speaker 9 (30:36):
But if it's like, okay, you're offered me to go
to dinner, like I haven't seen you in a little bit,
because the last the very last time that I saw him,
like we've only seen each other and like hung out
once within this entire period of time because I was
just gone and he was gone, and like he was
traveling for baseball and then I was traveling for track
and like whatever.
Speaker 4 (30:56):
But like the last time I saw him, I was.
Speaker 9 (30:57):
Like, hey, well, like this was great, Like I don't
know if I'll ever see you again, but like bye,
and he's like, what are you talking about? Like we're
from the same hometown, like summer, and I was like,
I mean, like I guess, like I don't know, though
it just seems like one of those situations of like
it doesn't make sense, but it could make sense if
it's like the right person.
Speaker 6 (31:16):
I'm just like, is he giving you any reason not
to trust him?
Speaker 2 (31:19):
Like no, Okay, I feel like you need to go
on the date and then report back to.
Speaker 6 (31:24):
Us because I'm listening to Daisy.
Speaker 4 (31:28):
And just go for it. Okay.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
Yeah, I'm gonna have like Lauren like message you to
make sure you went on the date after this. No,
I'm kidding.
Speaker 4 (31:37):
I can give the recap, I would say, more so
in piece.
Speaker 9 (31:40):
A question that I would have is just like if
you guys were in my position, and how long would
you kind of like if we kept going on dates,
like how long would you let things kind of go
until it was like all right, like kind of a
ticking time bomb of like I'm gonna go back.
Speaker 4 (31:54):
To school and you're.
Speaker 9 (31:57):
Gotta go do whatever, until it's like the question like
what are we doing?
Speaker 4 (32:01):
What are we like?
Speaker 2 (32:02):
Like, I think you need to go on like more
dates and like hang out more to figure it out
and then see if it like more becomes out of that,
and then like if you're leaving to go back to school,
like you guys can have that conversation or if it
pops up before that. But if it goes that long,
I mean it's June, when would you leave, probably like
August for school, Yeah, like mid August. I mean you
(32:23):
got like two months, so I feel like it keeps
going well, like why not?
Speaker 5 (32:27):
And then you.
Speaker 6 (32:28):
Come across as like a super transparent, open person, And
I think you would know real quick if he doesn't
respect what all the important like there are so many
things that are going on in your life, but there's
a good chance that he'll respect it, I mean, and
if he doesn't, then you know that's okay too, and
you just move on and you've got your perfect life, right, Yeah.
Speaker 5 (32:48):
I want a perfect life.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
No, I'm excited for you. Okay. So plan is, go
on that date.
Speaker 5 (32:55):
On the date, send us a message, let us know
how it goes.
Speaker 9 (32:58):
Okay, I will do that, and then I'll refer back
to you guys, and if this or not by the
time I'm a senior perfect.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
Well, thank you for coming on.
Speaker 4 (33:06):
Thanks for talking guys. This is so fun.
Speaker 5 (33:09):
Good talk to you.
Speaker 4 (33:10):
Okay, you guys have a great one.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
So bye. Okay, I'm gonna ask Jason a couple of questions. Jason,
how should girls bring up the what are we? Conversation?
Or should they they have to bring it up?
Speaker 5 (33:23):
Like when I think about this what if thing?
Speaker 6 (33:25):
And obviously I'm removed from this, but I talked to
my son about this all the time. The bigger picture
I'm hearing from all these girls is that they're scared
of what maybe the other person is thinking or feeling.
Speaker 2 (33:38):
And like the one girl was saying, like the chill girl,
like whatever she was saying, like you want to be
like the chill girl. But I'm like, y'all, shouldn't prepare forever?
And wonder I like.
Speaker 6 (33:48):
I think and I don't know if you have this
perspective after being out of college for a few years now,
it's like even going on the Bachelor or what's going
on with you in thor life. Short, the worst thing
that's to happen and all this stuff is a relationship
doesn't work out, like and we've all been there and
that's not that terrible.
Speaker 2 (34:07):
Yeah, no, I agree, Yeah, so I think they should
have the conversation too, Okay, And then next question, what
percent of sorority relationships do you think will survive the summer,
survive the.
Speaker 5 (34:22):
Like keep on data.
Speaker 6 (34:23):
I think a good percent survive the summer, but not
a big percent survive the next first quarter because you
get back into it and if you're really involved with
your sorority and if he's in a fraternity, all of
a sudden, you're back in this mix of like meeting
new people, busyness and all that kind of stuff. I mean,
it's like, what percent of relationships work out Anyways, we
(34:44):
talked about it, like maybe five percent and then maybe
twenty percent make it through the summer. It's probably a
small amount, but I don't like the same to the
last question, the worst thing that happens is it's over,
and then you will like and then you.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
I think, like all my friends are like all throughout college.
I think, like the only we only have like one
couple of like the college friend group that's still together
and then me and thora obviously got back together, but
everyone else has like broken up and it is either.
Speaker 6 (35:16):
That's still a good story, like you, guys, it doesn't
have to be the perfect like path like like I
have one friend from college that married his the like
same thing first weekend at an event. They met and
they got married. But that's such a small percentage, but
there's probably a percentage like you that date and then
get back.
Speaker 2 (35:36):
Together and get back together farther down the road.
Speaker 5 (35:38):
Yeah, yeah, totally interesting.
Speaker 2 (35:41):
This was like one of my episodes. Thank you for
doing it.
Speaker 5 (35:44):
Yeah, another thing. I just hope people could get it.
Speaker 6 (35:46):
Like I know how scary it is, and maybe it's
just like life experience or going through different stuff, But
I think if you open yourself up and try different things,
it's not going to be that bad. I mean, maybe
it hurts for a week or two weeks. Think these
girls could do it.
Speaker 2 (36:03):
Yeah, they got it, They got it. Well, thank you
for listening in and thank you Jason again for co
hosting with me. This was so fun. This is it
for the episode of Dirty Rush. And make sure you
follow us on Instagram and TikTok at Dirty Rush Podcasts
so you don't miss new episodes, exclusive clips and more.
(36:25):
And thank you again Jason, this was so fun.
Speaker 5 (36:27):
Thanks for having me
Welcome to Dirty Rush, The Truth about Sorority life with
your hosts me Gia Judice.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Daisy Kent, and Jennifer Kessler. Welcome back to another episode
of Dirty Rush. I'm Daisy Kent, and today I'm joined
by Jason Mesnik. We're here to talk all things dating
and to find out will sorority situationship survive this summer.
Hey Allison, Hello, it's nice to meet Nice to meet
(00:31):
you too. We heard that you have like a story
about like an abroad breakup or something along that line. Yeah, okay,
fill us in what happened? And where did you Where
do you go to school?
Speaker 3 (00:43):
Did you say go to cal Poly?
Speaker 4 (00:45):
Slow?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
And I'm in San Luis Obispo right now too, But
I'm from San Francisco.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Okay, cool, awesome.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Yes, But but the summer before I went abroad, I
met this guy also from the same school is me too,
And I ended up clicking very well with him, and
just like I feel like I was treated kind of
very nice, just being like taken out to dinner, just
on nice things that like I felt like, Wow, like
(01:13):
this is like a really good guy, and I feel
like I was in such a weird situation because it
was so difficult because I was also leaving for abroad
and I was studying abroad in Italy, which I was
really excited for, but it was like hard to move
forward with that situation with him just because of the
distance and like how it would play out, because I
(01:34):
think I was really excited to just become very independent
abroad and I feel like just gaining a lot of
new experiences. But at the same time, I did continue
wanting to talk to this guy and see where things go.
And it was I was studying abroad for four months
and we ended up trying to keep in contact a
little bit, but it ended up not really working out
(01:56):
like as I wanted it to, because I just think
a lot like changes over four months, and yeah, and
then I came back from abroad and it just ended
up just like being different, which was kind of frustrating,
but also like I was happy kind of about like
where I was at in my own life when I
came back, and just kind of how things played out too.
Speaker 5 (02:18):
What changed when he came back.
Speaker 1 (02:21):
So like he had asked me if I was talking
to anyone abroad, and I like really like I wasn't
like there was one new guy that I did meet abroad,
and I was like honest with him and I told
him about that. And then as soon as I said that,
like I met another guy there, but like I'm still
it's like he lives in Italy, Like nothing's gonna happen
(02:42):
after that. I think things started to change when I
said that, which kind of sucked.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
So do you think or into it kind of than
you were?
Speaker 1 (02:52):
I don't, I honestly, like I maybe he was, and
I think I could tell during that summer it was
definitely like in his head about how things would possibly
change when I did go abroad, and like I was
thinking about that a lot too, but I was also
very excited to have that experience at the same time
that it was really it was hard to prioritize both
(03:14):
things in my life.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Oh, definitely, like you were like probably having the time
of your life and like doing all these new experiences.
So I honestly, I think that's great that you went
and did that and weren't like, especially if you weren't
like together together, that you didn't have that back in
a way, and.
Speaker 6 (03:31):
It's not like that you let him hold you back
at all, which is awesome because like it's like that
opportunity I can almost guarantee, like when I traveled through
Europe years ago, Like it's some of my favorite memories
where you're free, you meet people, there's nothing holding you back,
and it sounds like you really let that happen. And
if he was and if he was ready for it,
maybe just he wasn't ready, like mature enough to really
(03:52):
understand like she needs this for herself and if I like,
if he was mature enough, he probably would understood it.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
I feel like distance is difficult when it comes to situationships,
especially over the summer. Like I've had a few where
it's just it's difficult to move on when you like
are in the same area over the summer, but then
you leave different places after. It's just it's hard, I
feel like sometimes to move forward with just like what's
to come with the distance, especially when you're starting off
(04:23):
a relationship too.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
Yeah for sure, So are you dating anyone now? Are
you single?
Speaker 1 (04:29):
I'm not dating anyone right now. I am single. I'm
really really excited to just graduate college and kind of
just to see what comes next.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Well, thank you so much for coming on, and I'm
so excited for you in this next chapter.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Thank you, Thank you so much, Daisy and Jason. I
appreciate talking to you guys.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Hey, Sarah, Hi, it's nice to meet you.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
You.
Speaker 5 (04:56):
Where are you at.
Speaker 7 (04:58):
I'm actually in Madrid.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Oh my gosh, so you're a broad right.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
Now, I'm abroad, but I move home tomorrow.
Speaker 5 (05:05):
H How long are you there for Madrid?
Speaker 7 (05:07):
I was here six months.
Speaker 5 (05:08):
Do you have the best time ever?
Speaker 3 (05:10):
It was awesome.
Speaker 4 (05:10):
It was the best time in my life.
Speaker 7 (05:12):
So the issue is when I moved abroad, I met
I met somebody like pretty early on in the experience,
and he's actually from here, and yes, and it was
you know, it's been going great and really hit it off,
like honestly hit it off with him more than I
(05:33):
have it to anybody at home, which is really crazy
because he's from Madrid, like you know, like born and
raised here, and but we've like, I mean, I move
home tomorrow, So it's like, what do I do. We
haven't set like a clear expectation, Like there's honestly been
no expectation, and how do I If I had been staying,
(05:54):
like with more time, I almost feel like, you know,
things would have progressed and like I just don't know.
Speaker 3 (06:01):
Whether to leave it here bring it home with me.
Speaker 5 (06:07):
I was like, this is like a story. This is
not a relationship. This is like what you see on
TV really that.
Speaker 4 (06:12):
Post grad Like who knows?
Speaker 7 (06:14):
Like I don't, I don't really know, but it's kind
of it's kind of sad, like going back and having
met someone so great.
Speaker 8 (06:21):
So are you guys?
Speaker 2 (06:23):
What time is it there? Like are you gonna have
you said goodbye? Or are you gonna see him?
Speaker 7 (06:27):
Like no, so no, I'm going to see why. I
have all day tomorrow, I like go home at like
three am. I fight six am the next day.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
So, so have you kind of been so you've been
to there like six months? So have you like basically
been together like six months or like five months or
like more like four and a half.
Speaker 7 (06:45):
Like I meant him kind of like I would say,
like a month and a half two months into this
and I don't know, it's been so long, but I.
Speaker 4 (06:54):
Don't know it's going so well, but like what do
you do?
Speaker 6 (06:57):
Like And it's probably more intense, like I felt like
when your novel it's more intense, like when you meet somebody,
like your time is so limited and it gets more
intense than.
Speaker 5 (07:05):
It would be at home.
Speaker 7 (07:07):
Yeah, because like there's no like there's no like endpoint,
there's no limit, like you're just home. Like, yeah, he's
been known that I'm supposed to only only be here
like till the beginning of June, and so now we're
kind of like here and it's like what do you do?
Speaker 2 (07:22):
I'm like, obviously you're going home tomorrow. So I'm like
I feel like almost once you get home, like see
how you feel?
Speaker 7 (07:31):
Right, I mean, like what else do you doo?
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Ever been?
Speaker 7 (07:36):
Like no, he's only been he's only been to New York.
He's never been to California.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
Your parents know about him.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
I've like told my mom.
Speaker 7 (07:46):
My mom and I are really close, like she knows everything,
but like yeah, she's like kind of just like write
it out, see where it goes? Yeah, talk to him maybe,
Like I mean, who knows. Like I had a friend
actually who and abroad once and she actually moved back
to like be with the guy she met, which is
(08:07):
kind of a crazy story, and I'm like could that
be me? But like I don't know, I don't I
don't know if I see myself moving back to Europe,
Like that's just so crazy to think it's only like
a year away.
Speaker 6 (08:18):
But how I just keep everything open, like it's such
like it may or may not work out, like who
the heck knows, but having that experience, you know, I've
got friends that met met years ago traveling abroad and
they're still married, you know, and they've.
Speaker 5 (08:34):
Lived overseas and they've lived locally.
Speaker 6 (08:36):
I'm just wondering, like, is he the same age as you, like,
same kind of experience in dating.
Speaker 5 (08:40):
And all that.
Speaker 4 (08:42):
He's a little bit older.
Speaker 7 (08:43):
I mean he graduated about two years ago, so he's
just been working, but like same age, like range, slightly different,
but yeah.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
Well that's good.
Speaker 6 (08:54):
I mean just like as long as he's not like
some young like he hasn't dated much, you know that
that be different, but like somebody who's got experience and.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
You're clipping so well, yeah, totally.
Speaker 6 (09:05):
I just wouldn't shut Like if you feel like long
distance is too hard and you've done it for several
months and like it's just like breaking your heart, but
I don't know why not keep an open mind, but yeah,
is that what you want?
Speaker 7 (09:20):
Yeah? Totally, Like I've never like hit it off with
someone like so great like him, like I feel like
dating culture is like so different back at home that
it's been so fun to see like the way like
guys like like in my age group act here, and
so like it's been like I don't want to like
just like discredit it and be like, oh, that was
(09:40):
just like a broad fun because like you know, like
you miss all the shots you don't take.
Speaker 6 (09:45):
I think you got the right attitude. I think I
think you keep on going with that attitude. And what's
the worst The best case scenario is awesome. The worst
case scenario is I gave it a shot and it
didn't work out perfectly, but I still gave it a shot.
Speaker 5 (09:58):
Yeah, what's that saying? Like you regret things that you
don't do? Yeah, Like I don't know.
Speaker 6 (10:03):
I like, I think you've got such a good head
on your soulders thinking about this thing and when you
get home, like, have you have you thought about for
sure staying in touch or not?
Speaker 7 (10:14):
Yeah, I definitely, Like I mean I want to and
like I hope that's like where his head's at obviously,
and like he says it is so like I just
hope that like that's just how it goes and that
you know, distance doesn't just like completely like kind of
break what we like have built this far, like right
off the bat, you.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Know, yeah, definitely. I'm sure it'll be difficult like going
back home too, but I feel like it'll be a
good way to like figure it out. And like what
Jason was saying, just like stay open to like that
and like other like opportunities and people too. I feel like,
and you never know.
Speaker 5 (10:54):
Yeah, you never know at all. Like it's like you
never know. It's the best.
Speaker 6 (10:58):
Like that feeling that you're having is so good and
so intoxicating.
Speaker 5 (11:02):
Just see if it keeps on.
Speaker 6 (11:04):
Going, like and knowing that he's you know, not you know,
two years younger than you, and he's got dating experience,
he probably knows more about what he wants versus a
younger guy, which is awesome. Yeah, and I think if
you do too, then I mean I think listen, listen
to mom.
Speaker 5 (11:22):
Mom nailed it.
Speaker 7 (11:23):
I mean, is she's saying, go for it, and he's yeah, Like,
have you guys talked about like would he I mean,
I know, you said you're still like figuring out and
so like would he ever be open to like moving
to the US?
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Has he ever mentioned anything like that?
Speaker 7 (11:38):
No, like we've never gone like that far as like moving,
and like he knows I have like one year of
college left. So I feel like that kind of like
stops any sort of like right now conversation from happening,
because like what is he going to do? Move to
my college town? But like I like he knows like
I love Madrid, Like I'm totally open to like coming back,
(12:00):
Like I can't wait to come back and visit Madrid,
like things have like that have been said, and like
he's ever been to California, like he would love.
Speaker 3 (12:06):
To go see what it's like. And so like those
types of.
Speaker 7 (12:08):
Conversations are like lead me to be like a little
bit hopeful that it like you know, means something, but
like as of like long term, it's like it's not
that it's not in that stage yet.
Speaker 6 (12:21):
Just be hopeful, and I'm actually going to I'm actually
going to Barcelona in like three weeks.
Speaker 7 (12:25):
Give me his address, Yeah, thanks, Yeah, let me know
what you think about him?
Speaker 6 (12:32):
Yeah again, Like just I know it's it's like the
mentality is so easy to get kind of pessimistic because
like you're going home and you're like it's over and
I got to go back to school and I'm going
to miss him.
Speaker 5 (12:44):
But I think if you flipped it on its.
Speaker 6 (12:45):
Head and and you had a conversation with yourself what
we're thinking or where your girlfriends would say, and if
he's actually a really good dude, like why not?
Speaker 2 (12:58):
Yeah, yeah, well I'm so glad you had such a
good experience. And honestly, yeah, like what Jason said, just
stay open and I'm excited for you. There's I feel
like there's like no like bad outcome of this. Honestly.
I mean, it doesn't work out, you meant a great
person abroad and maybe you guys can stay in content.
Speaker 5 (13:17):
And yeah it works out, it's awesome.
Speaker 6 (13:19):
If it doesn't, like you learned like it, it won't
feel great, but like you'll be you'll be happy you went.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
Through it like you experienced abroad to the fullest an experience.
Speaker 7 (13:31):
Yeah, it's a pretty great story if anything.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Well, it was great to meet you, and I'm wishing
to thank you guys.
Speaker 4 (13:38):
It was so great for me.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
You guys, hey me, Hey, Okay, so your boyfriend you
(14:00):
guys met at school then and then how did you
like go from a situationship to a relationship.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
So it was actually an interesting path. I think a
lot of my past experiences with the situationships kind of
paved the way for how I acted in this relationships
last situationship. For a while in the beginning, I wasn't
sure what he wanted, and we started off as friends.
We're actually friends for like about a year before we
started becoming a thing, if you want to call it that.
(14:31):
And so we were talking for a while, but we
knew we were going abroad, so it's kind of like
an unspoken like what's happening, like I don't know, and
then we went into break. We still talked over a break,
over a winter break before we went abroad and everything,
but it was very unknown. And then when we got
to abroad, I think he just kind of wanted to
(14:53):
see what was going on, not more not in like
a way of why I want to explore their options,
but more in a what's it going to look like?
Are we going to see each other a lot? We're
in a whole nother continent. And then once we kind
of knew that it was going to work and that
we still enjoyed really seeing each other, he asked me
to be his girlfriend.
Speaker 5 (15:10):
Were you excited? Really?
Speaker 3 (15:11):
Yeah, I'm really excited. It's been really great, and like
we went on two trips together. Yeah, we went on
two trips together. I went to Lisbon and Minorca with him,
so it was like really dreamy and awesome.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Oh that's so fun.
Speaker 5 (15:24):
But what's it like now back at home.
Speaker 3 (15:26):
Well, he's from the Bay, so he's more near Berkeley,
and so it's kind of hard, I mean because we've
only been dating for a small amount of time, so
it's like a content adjustment where it was an adjustment
abroad and now it's adjustment being back at home. And
it's been good. We're good at communicating, but I'm kind
of in that limbo where I'm like, I'm not gonna
(15:48):
see him for a few weeks and then I'm gonna
see him kind of rarely during summer. But so far,
it's good and he's been great at communicating. So it's
been really easy.
Speaker 5 (15:56):
And you guys are both super committed.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
Do you think, Yeah, I'm and I am. I think
he is as well. Yeah, it's a it's a great start.
I mean we had a kind of slow burn into
I think we're talking for like four months before we
actually dated, so I think we're pretty committed.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
Also, I feel like, I mean, this could just be
like my like take on things, but I feel like
a lot of times when people go abroad, like and
they're in like a situationship or like a relationship, like
the people everyone's kind of like, oh, I like, I
just want to have fun and like do me like
abroad and stuff. So I feel like that you guys
like actually came closer together is like very telling.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
Yeah, I know, it's actually I think it's really cute
because I mean, of course my friends are like me,
are you sure you want to do this? Like Spanish men?
You know, I was like ah, but I think it
made us like stronger and closer because it's like we're
doing such a big life event with each other. But yeah,
it was great.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
That's amazing.
Speaker 6 (16:50):
So how do you guys keep make sure that, like,
you guys are on the same page with everything, because sometimes,
like I know that when I did a dated a
girl while ago obviously long this, there's some jealousy like
do you guys are you open about all that stuff?
Speaker 5 (17:03):
Like how do you guys deal with it?
Speaker 3 (17:05):
Yeah, we're pretty open. I mean I'm a psychology major,
so I find it kind of easy to communicate and
express my feelings. I mean, it's not the easiest thing
to do for every person, but for me, I know
kind of the importance of that, Especially with my last situationship,
it was really deep and something that ended up happening
(17:28):
where I kind of lost trust in like all men,
to be honest. So it's been kind of not a struggle,
but it's been a journey for me to be able
to develop the trust and like appreciation for another person
in a romantic sense. But yeah, it's sorry, it was
question I really got on.
Speaker 1 (17:48):
Ah.
Speaker 6 (17:49):
No, No, I'm just wondering, like how you guys deal, like
like you're saying, you're like, I'm a psych major too,
so I always thought it was pretty pretty easy for
me to communicate. But sometimes doesn't matter guy a girl
that they up and you can't deal with harder questions
or some of this stuff.
Speaker 3 (18:04):
Yeah, totally. I feel like, especially since we started out
as a situationship, it's kind of like, I don't know,
there's kind of like a barrier where it's like how
much can I be myself? Like does this guy really
like me? We've been dating for I mean, we've been
talking for so long, before dating. But I think he's
a very naturally trusting person and I find it pretty
easy to trust him. He's been very transparent about everything.
(18:29):
I mean, I can't fully speak to that, I guess
because I don't know what he has going on in
his life at all times twenty four to seven. But
he's in my experience, been very open. And I'm someone
who's kind of an open book too, and I feel
like it's very necessary to have open communication with a partner,
especially when now we're like long distance or medium distance
(18:51):
or whatever. So it's kind of been surprising because I
feel like in my past experiences men aren't very good
at that, But I think I find someone who actually
is like really willing to put in the time and effort,
which is kind of surprising, but not about my own
but just like like in comparison to my last experiences.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Well, I'm so happy for you and that this is
like working out for you, And it sounds like you
found a really really great guy and that you guys
got to like travel with the world together. That's incredible.
Speaker 6 (19:20):
Yeah, and you have the same energy you have, like
you know how people like either one person's chill, when
a person's gut more energy or both people match.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
Like you're like, go, yeah, I mean I would say
he's a little more chill than me. I think he's
more outgoing. Actually sometimes I feel like I can like
kind of step back into my little corner. But he's
very outgoing, but he's less like bubbly, if that's what
you're asking. But I think it creates a balance because
he's super talkative and actually most of the time I'm
(19:50):
not very talkative. But it's great because I feel like
we kind of switch off on like oh, I have
a lot of energy today, or like I want to
talk a lot and it's like, well today I want
to listen. So it's like it's perfect. It's like a
it's a great balance.
Speaker 6 (20:04):
I only have one piece of advice, not only because
it's back kind of a joke, but anytime I'm in
a conversation with my wife now and I'm like, nah,
don't worry, I'm a psych major, Like I already know
this stuff, She's like, all right, a psych major is
really going to help you with our relationship. So just joking,
but realistically, I think I think it's awesome. I think
you found somebody who's great and just keep an open
(20:25):
mind about everything and keep trusting.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
I appreciate that, and I mean, yeah, being a psych
major doesn't really apply to every situation because it's very
varied and like relationships are different, but yeah, I agree
and thank you.
Speaker 6 (20:39):
No, it just gives you a different perspective on things,
and I do think that's helpful in any relationship.
Speaker 2 (20:46):
Well, thank you so much for coming on me. Yeah,
thank you.
Speaker 3 (20:49):
It was really really fun and new experience.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
For me as well. Yes, okay, well you have a
great rest of your day, you too, Thank you great.
Speaker 8 (20:58):
Bye.
Speaker 4 (21:13):
Hi guys.
Speaker 8 (21:14):
Hello, how are you?
Speaker 2 (21:16):
I am good? How are you?
Speaker 4 (21:18):
I'm good?
Speaker 2 (21:20):
Are you in school? Are you graduated?
Speaker 4 (21:22):
So I'm a junior.
Speaker 9 (21:24):
I go to Cal. I'll be a rising senior next year.
So I'm kind of over in Westwood right now, just
for the summer, which is really nice.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
So it's been great.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
Are you dating grad?
Speaker 9 (21:38):
So I'll give like this like shortened feel pretty much,
but basically so little context is that when I was
a freshman at Cal, there was a junior at Cal.
We were both athletes and so, like you have each other,
he played baseball. I'm on track and I was kind
(22:00):
of like he's older, like he has no idea who
I am, Like he honestly shouldn't.
Speaker 4 (22:03):
I'm a freshman. That would be kind of weird.
Speaker 9 (22:05):
And by the end of that year, his junior my
freshman year, he entered the transfer portal and went to UCLA.
We're both from the same hometown, so it was kind
of just this thing of like, okay, like I know
of you, like we follow each other on Instagram, like
but like I don't talk to you, like I've never
actually said hi to you whatever, not up until this
year in February, he like likes when of my Instagram
(22:30):
stories and I was just like, oh my god, whoa
Like Hi, that's really random, Like I know you, but
I don't know you. And I remember I liked one
of his stories and then he liked this like old
archived post of mine and I was like this is
just stupid. Now, like now we're just playing phone tag
and I literally just DMed him and I was like, hey,
figured i'd reach out, like if you're gonna like a
(22:50):
post that's like two years old of mine, like I'm
going to reach out. He's like, oh, yeah, like you should,
like please let me know, like when you're in SoCal,
like I know you're from Orange County. Like if you're
ever like visiting like UCLA, like i'd love to take
you out, like I.
Speaker 4 (23:03):
Love to take you out drinks.
Speaker 9 (23:04):
And I was like, yeah, sure, like i'm in season
right now, like you're also in season, so like I
don't know, but like i'll let you know.
Speaker 4 (23:10):
He's like, okay, can I remember.
Speaker 9 (23:11):
I was like, yeah, here's my number, texting like twenty
four to seven like all moments of the day for
like the next month. And then I was like, oh,
funny enough, like I'm going on spring break and I'm
gonna be coming home and he was like, oh my god,
Like if there's a day that works for you, like
I would love to like take you out to dinner,
like whatever you want to do. He's like, I can
(23:34):
take you out to drinks. And I was like, no,
I'm not twenty one, so we can't do that.
Speaker 4 (23:37):
And he's like that's.
Speaker 9 (23:38):
Okay, and we go out and we get dinner in Brentwood.
Speaker 4 (23:43):
It was really fun.
Speaker 9 (23:44):
It was just like really good like banter and just
like kind of like talked a lot from before, so
it was like, wait, I've been talking to you a
lot already and like I know you, but I don't
know you, and it was just like it was very
like seamless and easy and it was great. And then
we kept talking for a while after and like honestly,
like up until now, when I like came back home,
(24:05):
it was just kind of like all this like are
you in La, Like are you back yet, like like
just kind of like wanting like updates of just like
went because you knew I was gonna be back home
in LA and so but now it's kind of just
this thing of like, okay, well, like this is like
my first week back, and I literally think I'm seeing
him later today, which is hilarious. I think I'm going
(24:28):
out to dinner with him. I just haven't confirmed if
I want to yet or not.
Speaker 5 (24:31):
Why would you want to?
Speaker 4 (24:33):
I don't know.
Speaker 9 (24:33):
I'm more so just like I'm really tired right now
and like we'll see like kind of like I'm also
like supposed to do something with like family later too,
but my parents were both like if you want to
go on like a date, you can go.
Speaker 4 (24:46):
But I'm like, like I.
Speaker 9 (24:46):
Feel bad, but it's more so just an odd thing
of like I just turned twenty one he's twenty three
turning twenty four, like he was a fifth year like
this year while I was a junior. It's like I'm
going back up to Berkeley, and like he's gonna like
I don't know, figure out what he's gonna do with
his life, like graduating, like starting real life kind of stuff.
Speaker 4 (25:09):
So I'm more so just like I don't really know
like what to expect over.
Speaker 9 (25:13):
The summer of just like should this just be like
a summer fling or if I should like think about
having like higher expectations. Like I feel like I'm kind
of the person where I'm just like I love my life.
Speaker 4 (25:25):
Everything's great for me.
Speaker 9 (25:26):
My friends are great, my family's great, school is great,
running is great, works great to where like as long
as those things are like in line for me, like
I just like become just like more emotionally available. And
I'm not like a like very like reserved or like
closed off person. It's more so just like I don't
want to get my like hopes up or like put
in more if like it's not gonna be anything crazy.
(25:49):
So that's kind of my situation in the shortest that
I could tell it.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
I feel like you need to go out more dates with.
Speaker 6 (25:55):
Him, Yeah, don't put don't put a wall, Like I
feel like that there may be a wall that you're
putting up before you even know, Okay, don't you do
you feel like is there a reason for that, like
any other relationship that maybe didn't work out or and
I get like like the opposite of a college athlete,
like seriously, but at the same time, I know how
focused you have to be for my friends. But are
(26:18):
you curious about are you? But you're curious about him right, I'm.
Speaker 9 (26:21):
Definitely curious about him because I'm like we got along great.
He's like a really like really great guy. And like
the other thing that like kind of sold me a
lot too, is like my older friends at cal who
like were at school with him when he was still there,
like all just had like wonderful things to say about him,
and all of them were like really like happy and
shocked that we were talking. And they're like like my
girlfriends too that like knew him, and they're like you
(26:43):
need to keep going out with him, Like he's awesome,
he's so funny, like he's so sweet, and I'm just.
Speaker 4 (26:47):
Kind of like, oh my god, Like no, it's happening,
you know, it's like, oh my god, like I have
a crush, Like no, like.
Speaker 5 (26:54):
I don't you know yourself.
Speaker 4 (26:56):
Oh my god, Like I don't want to do that
right now.
Speaker 8 (26:59):
No, that's good.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
I feel like it's good.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
I feel like it's good.
Speaker 9 (27:03):
I feel like the only thing that like makes me
have walls up is just like wait, it's such a
like the thought of like it working out is like, yeah,
it's great, Like he could be a great guy for
a to work out with. I think more situational wise
of just like oh my god, like I have to
like go back to school, like I have to go
back up to Nork Hall eventually and like do senior year,
(27:24):
and like it's it seems like kind of just like
different ends of like oh I wish I met you
like earlier. I wish we were like the same age,
like at like the same point like in college with
like graduating, but like it's so different ends of the
spectrum to where that's where I'm like, oh my god,
is it like even makes sense kind of thing.
Speaker 5 (27:43):
Are you a planner?
Speaker 4 (27:44):
Yes, yeah, planner.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
I feel like there's never a right time, Like I
feel like always in the past when I've been in
relationships like I'm always like, oh, well, this won't work
out because this, and like I'm going back for the summer,
like random things like that. I always like overthought and
I think, like I feel like just going for it
is like the best possible outcome because then either you
find out it works or you find out it doesn't work,
(28:08):
and then you won't spend all this time like wondering.
Speaker 6 (28:10):
Right yeah, I mean I just wonder. You've got so
many good things in your life, right are you? Almost
in some way like I don't want to spoil what's
Like everything's good.
Speaker 9 (28:18):
I feel like I'm like everything's good to where like
that's like itself what makes me like emotionally available just
like wait, like I'm really happy right now, Like yeah,
I can like show up and like be great for
another person if it's like kind of reciprocated as well.
Like I feel like I'm pretty always good with like
balancing my people out, like making sure that like you know,
(28:40):
like if they're giving a hundred, I'm giving a hundred
like vice versa, and like keeping up with those relationships.
Like I there's nothing that I hate more than when
people are like I'm busy or like I can't I'm
busy or this, and that. It's like, no, you don't
even know what busy is. Like we none of us
know what busy is. We're all like young twenty year olds,
like you're not busy. So I feel like in that
part of like going into like next year, of like
(29:03):
me having enough time and like me being able to
like manage everything that I've going on like really well.
But then like on his end, he's just like, oh wait,
like I don't know what I'm doing with my life
and I'm graduated and I need to like figure out
like how I'm not going to be living at home
for the rest of my life.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
It's like I'm here and.
Speaker 9 (29:21):
I'm good, but like, I don't know what you're doing.
Speaker 6 (29:25):
But the one benefit I think of both of you
guys being college athletes, is you both understand. He'll know
your I mean, I don't like it's a different training
totally getting, but he'll know the busyness that it takes
to do. And I think that's an interesting card to
play at first, Like if he doesn't respect that, I'm
not saying, maybe he's like, go, do you you're the best?
Be the best version of yourself. But if he didn't
(29:46):
respect that, that'd be a red flag right away. But
if he does respect that and things end up being good,
and what if he fits into your perfect puzzle?
Speaker 5 (29:55):
Mm hmm yeah, if there he's a perfect puzzle.
Speaker 4 (29:58):
Right, Yeah, I know. It's just it's tricky. It's very tricky.
Speaker 5 (30:03):
You're scared.
Speaker 9 (30:04):
I'm a little scared because I'm just like, oh, like
you know, like everyone in like ourh has been down
this road so many times of just like it's again
like oh my god, I have a crush, like someone
killed me right now because I don't even want to
go down this road.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
Well, I think you should go on the date and
then you can fill us in.
Speaker 5 (30:21):
Okay, wait, yeah, you should definitely go.
Speaker 4 (30:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 9 (30:25):
It's almost like, oh, like he's offering like a nice dates.
That's why I'm kind of like, oh, like I might
need to. I feel like it's better than if it
was like a oh, like come over and whatever.
Speaker 4 (30:34):
It's like, wait, no, I'm not doing that.
Speaker 9 (30:36):
But if it's like, okay, you're offered me to go
to dinner, like I haven't seen you in a little bit,
because the last the very last time that I saw him,
like we've only seen each other and like hung out
once within this entire period of time because I was
just gone and he was gone, and like he was
traveling for baseball and then I was traveling for track
and like whatever.
Speaker 4 (30:56):
But like the last time I saw him, I was.
Speaker 9 (30:57):
Like, hey, well, like this was great, Like I don't
know if I'll ever see you again, but like bye,
and he's like, what are you talking about? Like we're
from the same hometown, like summer, and I was like,
I mean, like I guess, like I don't know, though
it just seems like one of those situations of like
it doesn't make sense, but it could make sense if
it's like the right person.
Speaker 6 (31:16):
I'm just like, is he giving you any reason not
to trust him?
Speaker 2 (31:19):
Like no, Okay, I feel like you need to go
on the date and then report back to.
Speaker 6 (31:24):
Us because I'm listening to Daisy.
Speaker 4 (31:28):
And just go for it. Okay.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
Yeah, I'm gonna have like Lauren like message you to
make sure you went on the date after this. No,
I'm kidding.
Speaker 4 (31:37):
I can give the recap, I would say, more so
in piece.
Speaker 9 (31:40):
A question that I would have is just like if
you guys were in my position, and how long would
you kind of like if we kept going on dates,
like how long would you let things kind of go
until it was like all right, like kind of a
ticking time bomb of like I'm gonna go back.
Speaker 4 (31:54):
To school and you're.
Speaker 9 (31:57):
Gotta go do whatever, until it's like the question like
what are we doing?
Speaker 4 (32:01):
What are we like?
Speaker 2 (32:02):
Like, I think you need to go on like more
dates and like hang out more to figure it out
and then see if it like more becomes out of that,
and then like if you're leaving to go back to school,
like you guys can have that conversation or if it
pops up before that. But if it goes that long,
I mean it's June, when would you leave, probably like
August for school, Yeah, like mid August. I mean you
(32:23):
got like two months, so I feel like it keeps
going well, like why not?
Speaker 5 (32:27):
And then you.
Speaker 6 (32:28):
Come across as like a super transparent, open person, And
I think you would know real quick if he doesn't
respect what all the important like there are so many
things that are going on in your life, but there's
a good chance that he'll respect it, I mean, and
if he doesn't, then you know that's okay too, and
you just move on and you've got your perfect life, right, Yeah.
Speaker 5 (32:48):
I want a perfect life.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
No, I'm excited for you. Okay. So plan is, go
on that date.
Speaker 5 (32:55):
On the date, send us a message, let us know
how it goes.
Speaker 9 (32:58):
Okay, I will do that, and then I'll refer back
to you guys, and if this or not by the
time I'm a senior perfect.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
Well, thank you for coming on.
Speaker 4 (33:06):
Thanks for talking guys. This is so fun.
Speaker 5 (33:09):
Good talk to you.
Speaker 4 (33:10):
Okay, you guys have a great one.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
So bye. Okay, I'm gonna ask Jason a couple of questions. Jason,
how should girls bring up the what are we? Conversation?
Or should they they have to bring it up?
Speaker 5 (33:23):
Like when I think about this what if thing?
Speaker 6 (33:25):
And obviously I'm removed from this, but I talked to
my son about this all the time. The bigger picture
I'm hearing from all these girls is that they're scared
of what maybe the other person is thinking or feeling.
Speaker 2 (33:38):
And like the one girl was saying, like the chill girl,
like whatever she was saying, like you want to be
like the chill girl. But I'm like, y'all, shouldn't prepare forever?
And wonder I like.
Speaker 6 (33:48):
I think and I don't know if you have this
perspective after being out of college for a few years now,
it's like even going on the Bachelor or what's going
on with you in thor life. Short, the worst thing
that's to happen and all this stuff is a relationship
doesn't work out, like and we've all been there and
that's not that terrible.
Speaker 2 (34:07):
Yeah, no, I agree, Yeah, so I think they should
have the conversation too, Okay, And then next question, what
percent of sorority relationships do you think will survive the summer,
survive the.
Speaker 5 (34:22):
Like keep on data.
Speaker 6 (34:23):
I think a good percent survive the summer, but not
a big percent survive the next first quarter because you
get back into it and if you're really involved with
your sorority and if he's in a fraternity, all of
a sudden, you're back in this mix of like meeting
new people, busyness and all that kind of stuff. I mean,
it's like, what percent of relationships work out Anyways, we
(34:44):
talked about it, like maybe five percent and then maybe
twenty percent make it through the summer. It's probably a
small amount, but I don't like the same to the
last question, the worst thing that happens is it's over,
and then you will like and then you.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
I think, like all my friends are like all throughout college.
I think, like the only we only have like one
couple of like the college friend group that's still together
and then me and thora obviously got back together, but
everyone else has like broken up and it is either.
Speaker 6 (35:16):
That's still a good story, like you, guys, it doesn't
have to be the perfect like path like like I
have one friend from college that married his the like
same thing first weekend at an event. They met and
they got married. But that's such a small percentage, but
there's probably a percentage like you that date and then
get back.
Speaker 2 (35:36):
Together and get back together farther down the road.
Speaker 5 (35:38):
Yeah, yeah, totally interesting.
Speaker 2 (35:41):
This was like one of my episodes. Thank you for
doing it.
Speaker 5 (35:44):
Yeah, another thing. I just hope people could get it.
Speaker 6 (35:46):
Like I know how scary it is, and maybe it's
just like life experience or going through different stuff, But
I think if you open yourself up and try different things,
it's not going to be that bad. I mean, maybe
it hurts for a week or two weeks. Think these
girls could do it.
Speaker 2 (36:03):
Yeah, they got it, They got it. Well, thank you
for listening in and thank you Jason again for co
hosting with me. This was so fun. This is it
for the episode of Dirty Rush. And make sure you
follow us on Instagram and TikTok at Dirty Rush Podcasts
so you don't miss new episodes, exclusive clips and more.
(36:25):
And thank you again Jason, this was so fun.
Speaker 5 (36:27):
Thanks for having me
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