I love new york

New York farting week

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:16):
It's like this. It's Anya, guys, and it's true. Oh
my gosh, when I'm somewhere.

Speaker 2 (00:26):
We're on the streets of New York. It's a beautiful,
beautiful Sunday evening.

Speaker 1 (00:34):
Sunday afternoon. Actually it is really late. It's about to
be seven pm, and it's like that time of year
where it's already getting dark again too early, and it
makes me want to kill myself in a very special way.

Speaker 2 (00:44):
And it's very cloudy and gorgeous and stunning.

Speaker 1 (00:49):
Should we walk slower so our cameraman isn't like jogging
like birds like. He's like, really scared, guys.

Speaker 2 (00:54):
I'm just used to walking on the streets. Hey, I'm
walking here, you know, so we walk.

Speaker 1 (00:58):
Fast people like people are. He was like, oh my god,
are you guys from here? Just like by our nature
and our pace and the way we navigate. Actually, we
had a really very obvious neither of us are from
here moment because we were waiting for an uber and
Drew was standing in the street and these two teenagers
thought Drew staring at them, and the teenager didn't even
say anything like necessarily rude. I don't know if it
was supposed to be a dig but he just looked

(01:19):
at DR and was like, you look like you just
came in from Miami, and like I had a very
like you know, the clip of Reach.

Speaker 2 (01:26):
I didn't know he said that. I thought he said,
I'm not from here. I'm from Miami. That's what I
thought said he.

Speaker 1 (01:33):
I think he said something about that and then looked
at you and then like he was like, I'm not
from here, like and then he was like are you
He said something about La, but he was just like
talking and I don't know what his point was. It was
like a younger kid. We had to have it in
like fifteen. But I felt like Rihanna at the Lady
Gaga concert when Lady Yaga says show me your teeth,
because when he said to Miami thing, I just like

(01:54):
wasn't paying attention.

Speaker 2 (01:55):
It was like your activation.

Speaker 1 (01:56):
From Miami, and it like decentered him, destabilize him in
a crazy way where instead of bullying us continuously, he
just like stopped his bike and watched us get into
our uber and didn't say a single word to us again.

Speaker 2 (02:09):
Then I yelled, you're not even from Brooklyn and he
didn't check in with me, which you have to do
if you come to Brooklyn, like you have to check
in with me, and like most people don't, and I
let it slide and that's on me.

Speaker 1 (02:21):
Let's stand to the side.

Speaker 2 (02:22):
But like, wait, why so.

Speaker 1 (02:24):
We can let people pass? Oh, I'm like, I'm a
what's a cauld, I'm a conscious thinker. I live in
the present. I'm very, I'm very I don't attach myself
to worldly goods because I am earthly.

Speaker 2 (02:37):
No, we know you've left your iPad, your wallet, your iPhone,
your vape, literally any technology or any form of identification
that Enya's had on this trip has been left somewhere.
Like we she left her iPad in our hotel and
then we transferred hotels and she still hasn't picked it up.
And then well, because it's insane.

Speaker 1 (02:58):
Hands, they need identify occasion to get it.

Speaker 2 (03:01):
Then she left her wallet and I have.

Speaker 1 (03:04):
It, so they're not You're not gonna do nothing. Money.

Speaker 2 (03:06):
Yeah, she left her wallet in the uber that got
returned safely. That guy was a saint.

Speaker 1 (03:12):
Really lucky.

Speaker 2 (03:13):
Came up on forty dollars for INA's fall.

Speaker 1 (03:17):
You have him forty dollars for having to do a
whole goddamn drive around and give me my my wallet back.
We should move over. There's a child on a bike
and I really don't want like the intimidation tactic because
although I like don't attach myself to like worldly technologies
like you and I lose all my devices, right or
it's not a bike, it's like a scooter. Oh see,

(03:39):
Drew would never survive here.

Speaker 2 (03:41):
I just have to No, I don't give up. No,
I I take up space just as much as everybody
else takes up space.

Speaker 1 (03:47):
That has nothing to do with the fact that you're
not like paying attention or maybe oh the streets they're alive.

Speaker 2 (04:00):
And then and then we had coffee this morning and
Enya left her phone in the booth of the coffee
place and guess.

Speaker 1 (04:08):
What, godd it just as his angels protecting me because
a man ran out of the cafe and was like, hey,
is this your phone? And I don't know if you
heard what he said, but I think he said that
he recognized it was me because of the cover. I
don't know if you like picked that up? Did you?
Did anybody pick that up?

Speaker 2 (04:25):
No?

Speaker 1 (04:27):
Because on my wallpaper, it's my blithe doll. Drew got
me of myself and thankfully. I was wearing my glasses,
so I looked just like the picture. I'm sure he
thought I looked like a doll in a way. He
was flirting with me, which is something that just happens
to me all the time.

Speaker 2 (04:45):
Why are we here in New.

Speaker 1 (04:46):
York Fashion Week? Ay? Fashion Week?

Speaker 2 (04:56):
The streets are alive, y'all.

Speaker 1 (04:59):
That's Austin Butler zooming off to the Botega Venetta x
super Dry collab. That's happening for the opening of Rocky's.

Speaker 2 (05:08):
Macha Cathe Is that something for real happening?

Speaker 1 (05:12):
No?

Speaker 2 (05:12):
But then that sounds so really that's like a try
brand activation to get you to buy more shit.

Speaker 1 (05:18):
Yeah, We're getting to a place where like we have
to start asking what brand's sexual identity is because I'm
starting to believe most brands are polyamorous.

Speaker 2 (05:29):
Wow, and I grew.

Speaker 1 (05:32):
Up thinking they were more monogamous. Yeah, so it's like
odd to me the way they're all like, they're kind
of like swingers.

Speaker 2 (05:39):
Now everybody's collabing with everybody who should we collab? And
Supreme is the ring leader.

Speaker 1 (05:46):
And Supreme set up the system.

Speaker 2 (05:48):
Supreme is a Supreme witch.

Speaker 1 (05:50):
I think I'm gonna for my last venture before I
leave New York go to Supreme and pick a random
person and say pick anything. I'm gonna get you ten
of them and just see what happens and I'm not
gonna get it. Has anybody ever done that, like gone
up like done a brink where they've gone up to
people and be like, Oh, pick anything you want, I'm

(06:11):
gonna buy it and get.

Speaker 2 (06:12):
Them to the catch Yeah that's one hundred percent and
then walked with that's like a Nathan for You bit.
Wait a Nathan for You episode where he has a
spin wheel out front and he's like, oh, spin the
wheel and whatever you land on, I'll go in and
buy it and then or you win it or something
like that. And then they spin the wheel and they
go in and then he makes them buy it and

(06:33):
at the cash register is like a very starving child
and you would be a bad person if you didn't
end up buying it. It's just like it makes you
feel guilty.

Speaker 1 (06:43):
Kind of what the donation thing feels like at stores.
Oh I'm not doing it. Imagine how pissed you'd be
if you were in the background of a stupid ass
podcast like this one. Everyone he already has to get
terrorized all week by every influencer who's coming to town
to be like, look at my shoes, look at my shirt,
look at my pants, and look at us. No different

(07:06):
than the rest, honestly, look at the it's all about. Look.
I was gonna say to you earlier, there's one that's Drew.
Where's Drew? Oh right there?

Speaker 2 (07:14):
Cute, the one, oh yeah, the one with the rock
hard abs right.

Speaker 1 (07:18):
Yeah, in the gate.

Speaker 2 (07:19):
That's why. That's why I'm the one under.

Speaker 1 (07:22):
Here that's all knocked out and fucked up, because I'm
about to go crazy off this bugs ball. We really
wanted to get cut Waters because I just felt like
a New York vibe, a cut water drinking, a cut
water on the water, New York.

Speaker 2 (07:41):
What I'm trying to think? What's happened to me this
the past few days? Oh? I went to the gay
bars of New York. I went to Animal and I
went to the Lexenborough or whatever the fuck the lex
Lexi Lexi.

Speaker 1 (07:59):
Dude, you don't know anywhere? Like no, I don't genuinely
does not know anywhere he goes. He can't document it,
he can't remember it, he doesn't remember when he watches
and what's crazy is you ask more questions than any human,
Like you were the most like inquisitive person in terms
of random information.

Speaker 2 (08:18):
No, I know a lot, A little about a lot.
It sounds beautiful on the mics. Guys were at a
zoo for audio listeners only. We walked it. We bought
a zoo. We bought a zoo. Surprise.

Speaker 1 (08:33):
Wait, okay, okay, walk a little closer. Okay, do you hear?
Do you hear what the gift might be?

Speaker 2 (08:39):
Wait? A gift.

Speaker 1 (08:41):
I bought you something and it's huge.

Speaker 2 (08:43):
Would you buy me?

Speaker 1 (08:44):
Well, it starts with a z zebra. No, okay, think
about a lot of them.

Speaker 2 (08:49):
A zoo. Yeah, you bought me a zoo.

Speaker 1 (08:53):
Your eyes, you're gonna see a zoo. This is your
fucking self tape. Like people have no imagine oh my god?

Speaker 2 (09:00):
When well, no, I just literally had no idea what
the fuck was happening. Just I was just like I
was even too exoteric for me.

Speaker 1 (09:08):
Yeah, I just I don't live on this plane. I
actually think I'm losing it. I think I'm gonna get
like really really gnarly.

Speaker 2 (09:15):
Spiritual psychle The week, yeah, oh the week. That's that's
what's been happening to me every single night.

Speaker 1 (09:21):
That's what you would think if spiritual psychosis was happening.
I guess that's literally don't even realize it's happening.

Speaker 2 (09:27):
I literally would every single night at like three am.
The Devil's at work, mind you. I enter like a
level of like religious.

Speaker 1 (09:35):
Psychias the devil's hour, Yeah, like like six six, six am.

Speaker 2 (09:42):
But no, I've been like, look at the sunset.

Speaker 1 (09:45):
Oh my god. Wait, maybe we go in front of
you so you don't have to walk backwards?

Speaker 2 (09:49):
Yeah, or I don't know if I'll be able to
do that.

Speaker 1 (09:53):
No, No, not us walk backwards. It's like you behind
us whatever, You're gonna get hit by a car bro
a motorcycle. Actually, but do you think you would die
from the impact of a motorcycle if it's going that fast?

Speaker 2 (10:04):
Yes, you can't. You you wouldn't die, but you can't.

Speaker 1 (10:08):
I guess that's like the year is finish what I
was saying. I hit the person and then they hit
their head and they die.

Speaker 2 (10:15):
Let me finish what I was saying. I was every
single night, I'll lay awake in bed at three am
and enter like the most intense religious psychosis where I'm like, oh,
my God, the end is in the ear. I need
to start praying to God. Bitch, I'm not even a
fucking Christian like that, but like, damn, if I start praying,
like maybe I won't end up an eternal damnation.

Speaker 1 (10:36):
I sometimes see my OCD convinces me that if you
start praying, you're actually doing the opposite, because you're only
talking to God when you need something. Because did you
ever hear that? You heard that a lot growing up? Right?

Speaker 2 (10:46):
Yeah, I'm getting fucking dripped out. I'm getting slimmed out
in New York. They just slimed me out. What the
fuck they're.

Speaker 1 (10:55):
Sliming all over you? No, I'm not kidding. One time
I was wearing my glasses and I was walking down
I don't fuck nowhere, probably in Chinatown, and someone's ace
my eyes in my lenses and I sprayed my face
with a hand sanitizer.

Speaker 2 (11:14):
Is it raining?

Speaker 1 (11:15):
No? Oh, there's like no clouds above you, Like, is
it raining? Where would the like? Where would the rain?

Speaker 2 (11:21):
I have a hat on and I can't see up
unless I look up. And I asked that before.

Speaker 1 (11:26):
No one can see up unless they look up.

Speaker 2 (11:29):
No, you can like look up with your eyes. I'm saying,
I turned my head up. Whatever, Well, I'm looking up
with my soul.

Speaker 1 (11:35):
I'm only on the up from here.

Speaker 2 (11:37):
But yeah, I've been praying every single night at three am.

Speaker 1 (11:40):
What do you pray about? Uh?

Speaker 2 (11:43):
Just it's really selfish prayers. I'm like, make sure I
don't end up in Hell. Oh what, Yeah.

Speaker 1 (11:50):
You're worried about going to Hell? Yes, dude, I just
can't be bothered. I just don't. I Also, maybe that
is proof I'm a decent person, because I've never once
have I been like, damn, I'm actually going to Hell.
I think you actually have to do? Was that one
of the.

Speaker 2 (12:04):
Kill the fucking lantern flies? Those are my number one.
They're all over our hotel balcony and it's so fucking freaky.

Speaker 1 (12:10):
Stud Drew tried to like play with me and say
there was one on me, and I literally got so mad.

Speaker 2 (12:17):
It wasn't even like a joke, like, look at the
fucking sunset? Are you actually I'm gonna crash out? Hello? Hello, Hello, Hello,
Hello Hello.

Speaker 1 (12:29):
Should I steal this dog?

Speaker 2 (12:31):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (12:31):
I want to steal this dog. Gorgeous? That dog has
eyes of a human. Oh my gosh. Actually that brings
me to an amazing topic. I saw this woman today
who she does pet readings. I don't really understand it
because I think she interviews. Yeah, she's like a psychic
interviewing your animal. You're animal? Wow? Oh no.

Speaker 2 (12:57):
Every time I'm coming to New York, I'm like, I
don't want to fucking come to New York. And then
I get to New York and I'm like, wow, I
love New York.

Speaker 1 (13:07):
Yeah. I get here and I'm like, that's it. I
get here and I'm silenced because I'm so amazed. How
did they build this city so fast? Did you know
that they only started building buildings this tall in twenty ten.

Speaker 2 (13:28):
That's what's been freaking me out lately.

Speaker 1 (13:30):
They got all this up in the span of like
three years, I would say, and it was all discounted
from no no, no, no.

Speaker 2 (13:37):
Oh no, no no no. You don't want to talk
about nine to eleven.

Speaker 1 (13:40):
Oh no, I mean actually you probably really don't.

Speaker 2 (13:43):
You don't want to talk about nine to eleven.

Speaker 1 (13:46):
Wait, I'm like, should we post up somewhere?

Speaker 2 (13:47):
Yeah, let's keep walking a little bit.

Speaker 1 (13:50):
Oh. But basically, there's this woman who she will interview
your cat. I don't say how so get down and
inter your cat.

Speaker 2 (14:01):
Oh yeah, that was the joke.

Speaker 1 (14:03):
I was like waiting for you to pick up on.
But yeah, I saw her talk about this one cat
that she was saying was like an evil cat and
that it was a demon cat, and she says she
said that she also kind of rude. She said to
the cat that she hated talking to the cat. Oh wow,
which I think is rude because she said, but the
cat was admitting to being a demon having like the

(14:27):
cat was saying that it is both evil and good.
It shares both of the intentions. Anyway, I really want
her to talk to a zoul because she sent this
woman like a transcription of the whole interview she had
with her cat, and the woman was like, oh my god,
this is honestly making me laugh so hard because it's

(14:47):
such a real description. We call our cat a demon
cat because like he is a demon, but he's like
she's a good boy. Like whatever the hell the gender
of the cat is. Which should we start?

Speaker 2 (15:00):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (15:03):
Should we go down there?

Speaker 2 (15:04):
I think we should set up camera here facing that
way and just like perch up on this like a
japan Okay cutay.

Speaker 1 (15:13):
But yeah, I want to get Azol's reading done because
she seemed pretty accurate. But also it's kind of insane
how you can really sell anything as long as you
have passion. Because I watched her whole video. I want
to see how long this video of her talking about
this random cat I don't know is. I watched this
whole video, not in double speed, not anything. I just

(15:34):
had it propped up and was staring at my phone.
Oh my god. Hello, So this was the worst animal
communication session that I've ever.

Speaker 2 (15:44):
Done on my shoe. Oh wait, I've seen I've seen
people do this before.

Speaker 1 (15:48):
Dude, this is ten minutes.

Speaker 2 (15:51):
Oh my god, I watched it on Your span is lit?

Speaker 1 (15:54):
Yeah, I do have a pretty good attention span. I
can't lie like I haven't been on my phone. Oh
can I see your screen? Because the thing last time
in New York is somehow you still had an insane
screen time, don't And for some reason I assume it
is because Drew has been staying up every night till
like five.

Speaker 2 (16:10):
Oh my god, you're right, So like there's no way.

Speaker 1 (16:13):
Your screen time is in like diabolical.

Speaker 2 (16:16):
Yeah, it's horrible. It's like literally terrible.

Speaker 1 (16:22):
Okay, you know what's fucked up? Is eleven hours? Really
isn't your worst by any means? Wait, I think at
my screen time the other day was really bad and
I almost cried showing it to you.

Speaker 2 (16:32):
Oh you had four you had like fifteen hours? Yeah you,
yours was higher than mine.

Speaker 1 (16:37):
Where the hell is this? Sixteen hours in ten That
is fucking crazy. Sixteen hours and ten minutes is pretty
fucked up, dude, That.

Speaker 2 (16:47):
Is genuinely insane.

Speaker 1 (16:50):
Yeah, I mean eight hours of it, dude. Okay, six
of those hours was on YouTube. I do remember that
was the Maybe I faked about this on the last episode. No,
I think I'm trying to explain it to somebody else.
I was trying to explain to somebody in real life
while why it was so high. But I watched a
bunch of movies at once. Yeah, TikTok has seven hours,

(17:11):
but I was doing research, you know, I was watching
so many videos, not the double speed for ten minutes.
It was really a lot of work. And Drew's been
having the best time in New York without me. Every
time we've tried to key together, it turns into like
the most like, Wow, I think I'm just a vibe
killer for Drew's new York life. If you lived here alone,

(17:32):
I think I would lose you.

Speaker 2 (17:34):
Yeah, you would, like I literally love it, like I
love just like mobbing around solo because I'm like something
I do like about New York which isn't a hot take,
but it's like you go outside, you run into friends,
and then you spend the day. You don't have to
make plans, and like a finite plan scares the ever
living shit out of me like that, like or like
a plan with a time to meet somewhere, like the

(17:57):
three hours leading up to it, I'm like, oh, I
need to not do this. I need to not do this.
And I think my mic is not picking up my
audio at all. So that's cool. But I like New
York because I never make plans. I just run into
people and I have no time to ruminate or have

(18:18):
anxiety over any of it.

Speaker 1 (18:22):
It is funny, though, because you did the I feel
like the best that you had started off with a
plan that you were like not ruminating on, but you
were like, am I you going? You went to dinner alone,
which is also like for some reason that felt crazy,
like you go on, I was inviting you. I know
I know that, Oh I know that I'm always invited.
I don't worry about not being invited. I'm always invited.

(18:43):
I'm actually always hosting the party. Weirdly enough, that's actually
what it feels like. I can't lie every party I've
been to. I feel like somehow I become part time
hosts because I need everybody in a room to have
a good time if I'm there, or because if I
over observe so one's interactions and I feel like someone
made someone uncomfortable, I literally want to kill myself and

(19:04):
air the whole fucking place.

Speaker 2 (19:05):
No, Like, I don't know how people host parties, like
specifically house parties, like hosting a party at a separate venue.
I'm like, tea, like do that, but like hosting a
party out of your house is so fucking scary, like bitch,
just like be pissing in the corners, Like I've pissed
in the corner of a house party before.

Speaker 1 (19:23):
What Yeah, I was like fifteen, and then that was
real because I'm like, what was the house party you
went to? Like actually, like the ex party, the Project
X party.

Speaker 2 (19:32):
Basically every party in twenty fifteen and twenty sixteen was
the Project X party.

Speaker 1 (19:37):
I guess, yeah, because everybody was trying to remake that.
Now what are people trying to real.

Speaker 2 (19:41):
And people were just genuinely happy and it wasn't like
about escaping reality. It was about adding to reality.

Speaker 1 (19:48):
Reality.

Speaker 2 (19:49):
And now to go to a house party, it's too blackout,
so you don't have to deal with what's going going on?

Speaker 1 (20:00):
What's going on? What's going on? I mean, everybody's back
to partying because there's literally nothing.

Speaker 2 (20:07):
We feel like it's a recession.

Speaker 1 (20:09):
Yeah, Like it is so insane to see stats about
drinking in our age range jumping up and like consumption
of everything jumping up, because it's like, wow, well.

Speaker 2 (20:19):
See I'm hearing conflicting reports. Okay, someone's telling me that
gen Z isn't drinking, and then other people are telling
me that gen Z is drinking, And I'm like, which
is it. I like to believe that gen Z isn't drinking,
because like, I don't think we're drinking as much.

Speaker 1 (20:36):
But.

Speaker 2 (20:37):
I don't I want it would make sense if people
were drinking more because the world is an evil, dark sided,
evil place.

Speaker 1 (20:45):
I mean, I'm sure the stats I've seen definitely allocate
for the fact that we were in a pandemic and
there were years where like obviously drinking had to have
been on a.

Speaker 2 (20:56):
Dipping That's what I was explaining.

Speaker 1 (20:57):
Yeah, whatever, so that makes sense. But I'm also like,
I don't know, I feel like everyone's drinking, but also
it's we're here for fashion week, so it's hard to like, yeah,
but even back home, No, even back home, literally everyone
went out, even all my friends who didn't because we
didn't travel for the summer, we didn't do eurosummer, but

(21:18):
even all of our friends who stayed home with us,
it was like wow. But I guess my idea of
partying is like twice a week we end up at
someone's house after dinner and we've all had three drinks.

Speaker 2 (21:28):
And we're late that Yeah. Yeah, I have re entered
my alcoholic arc, which is kind of it. No, not actually,
but I have like found myself like excited to drink,
which has never ever, ever, ever ever been the case
for me ever. Like now I'm like, oh, like I'm

(21:50):
looking forward to having a drink tonight, which is fucking scary. Yeah,
that's a slippery slope for mister Drew Phillips with the
DNA that I got. Yeah, I mean, I gotta chill
the fuck out.

Speaker 1 (22:02):
I definitely do worry, like often about the fact that
I come from like an extremely addictive gene and I'm
for sure playing with fire. But listen, gods don't know
nut to go buy a candle till they get their
whiskers burnts a little way, you.

Speaker 2 (22:19):
Know, you know, you know, like the saying curiosity killed
the cat. I literally experienced that for the first time
last night. And I can't say it publicly, but curiosity
killed the fucking cat. And that's what kind of ignited
my spiritual side or my religious psychosis last night.

Speaker 1 (22:39):
I think kind of anything, anything off the beaten path
of what your anxious brain has assumed could possibly happen,
will send you down a spiritual yeah.

Speaker 2 (22:50):
In my brain, and I can legitimately like the thing
is is no one can get shipped by me, Like
that's the thing I was talking about this with Oriyan,
Like if someone does something that they know would hurt
my feelings, I will find out the universe will bring
it to me. Like that's the thing is, Like I
don't even really look for it. I don't even have

(23:11):
to look for it. The way it landed in my
lap last night was fucking crazy.

Speaker 1 (23:16):
So curious. You're so annoying.

Speaker 2 (23:18):
We're on the move again, y'ah.

Speaker 1 (23:20):
What's crazy? Is I un ironically un ironically excellent? Oh
my gosh, it's literally so pretty on this goddamn planet.
Are you freaking kidding me?

Speaker 2 (23:39):
Guys? I had so much to say, and now I
have nothing to say. Isn't it funny how that works?

Speaker 1 (23:44):
Cause my mind is being blown by this.

Speaker 2 (23:47):
Yeah, that's what I was about to say. Maybe sometimes
just taking the view, guys, taking the view with us.
Look at all the little birds out out there.

Speaker 1 (24:00):
Oh my gosh, it's packed.

Speaker 2 (24:02):
The one thing is if you say words with pe
in it, it deafens the listeners. Just fun fact. Oh
that's literally not my problem problem, that's not my pussy.

Speaker 1 (24:16):
New York is literally insane. I can't believe some people
live here their whole life, like you genuinely have to
be such a specific kind of person to get that done.
If Jimmy Fallon came up behind you right now and
said that he would give you one hundred thousand.

Speaker 2 (24:32):
Dollars to jump into his balls, yes I would.

Speaker 1 (24:35):
Everything has to be sexual with you, it's so weird,
just FYI Like, if you want to have sex with
like other people and not me anymore, just like I
don't know, just say that.

Speaker 2 (24:50):
Because it is water. Yes, for one hundred k Yes,
I would do that for five hundred dollars.

Speaker 1 (24:56):
I guess that is too much. That's way too much.

Speaker 2 (24:58):
I would do it for five und.

Speaker 1 (25:02):
I think this might be some of the dirtiest water
you can let your body touch, though.

Speaker 2 (25:07):
I mean I was literally eat like a garbage disposal,
like my skin is you have titanium? Thank you?

Speaker 1 (25:19):
No, but that's why it would suck. Yeah, I don't
think your body is equipped to handle whatever the fuck
is in this water. Dude, I would put money on
the fact that at least one person shits in this water,
if not a day a week.

Speaker 2 (25:33):
Yeah, what is in this water?

Speaker 1 (25:34):
I don't know. It's just genuinely horrifying.

Speaker 2 (25:37):
Do you think there's like evil fish in the water?
Evil fish, like radioactive evilfish?

Speaker 1 (25:42):
Oh my gosh, is that a thing?

Speaker 2 (25:44):
No, I'm not getting Like, I'm sure I had an
evil fish growing up in my fucking fish tank. I
got a get jackknife clown No, I got a jackknife
clown fish, and I put it in a tank full
of my little baby puffer fish and I had like
an assorted freshwater tank, and this motherfucker every single night

(26:06):
for like two weeks straight, would slay one of my
babies until he ended up being the last fucking creature
in there. And that's how I found out he was
the one killing them, because he would do it under
the guise of night playing among us. Yes, like he
was eliminating it.

Speaker 1 (26:19):
I thought the other fish were probably so scared, like,
oh my god, this guy. They probably thought you were
the torturer.

Speaker 2 (26:24):
No, they thought I was getting off on it like.

Speaker 1 (26:27):
Fish kind of dumb though, Yeah, yeah, because like squid
and octopus are geniuses.

Speaker 2 (26:33):
Yeah, there's I ate squid for the first time in
a very long time, Like I love swiat in Malibu,
and I there was not a bite of it where
I wasn't thinking about me eating an intelligent creature. And
you kept chewing and I kept chewing, and I kept
chewing and chewing and chewing. Yeah, I was delicious, Like

(26:55):
oh wow. But you see the thing is is it
kind of reminds me of like tendons on.

Speaker 1 (27:00):
And that's you like that, Oh I like that, wait, that's.

Speaker 2 (27:07):
Right there, but yeah, like a tendon on, a chicken
wing will legitimately ruin my entire afternoon. It'll ruin my day.
What a tendon on a chicken wing will rufe?

Speaker 1 (27:19):
I love? I'm not kidding. There's nothing I love more
than crunching on bones. Like I want to eat a
piece of chicken.

Speaker 2 (27:26):
That food up.

Speaker 1 (27:27):
I want to I want to like eat the bone.
I want to eat the cartilage. I really like that
part of the chicken leg where it's like the little
flappy gummy part that you can peel up and then
it takes off the whole calf part of a drumstick.
Oh my god, that little flappy part is delicious. Love
the texture. I think I'm a texture eater. I've decided the.

Speaker 2 (27:49):
Thing is I would not get Lasik eye surgery again.
I think the only reason I thought of that was
because you said, like peeling up a flap on a
chicken bone, and that's what they did in my eye.
They literally go up in your fucking eye and play
games in it. Like it's fucking crazy, Like I literally
saw a disco inside of my irl. Operator Yeah no,
like for real, Like they like peel up layers of

(28:12):
your eye and like shine lasers in it, like and
then also like.

Speaker 1 (28:16):
The horrors thing is the fact that they record it
and then they sell it to you because you didn't
even get it for free, right, or do they give
it to you for free?

Speaker 2 (28:24):
Get what for free?

Speaker 1 (28:25):
The video of your lasek?

Speaker 2 (28:27):
No, you get it for free. Oh, they treat it
like a riot at six Flags.

Speaker 1 (28:33):
You should have just lied.

Speaker 2 (28:34):
Also, by the way, every single ride I've been on
where they take a picture and then they make you
pay for it after the person's just given it to
me for free, almost every single time.

Speaker 1 (28:45):
That's pretty privileged.

Speaker 2 (28:46):
Yeah. No, literally, and it's not like they know who
I am. It's just literally they just like see how
gorgeous I am. It's fucking crazy, like they see how
beautiful I am.

Speaker 1 (28:56):
No, they probably feel bad for you.

Speaker 2 (28:57):
Yeah, they see they're usually the one who alone. I'm
the one alone or I'm the one never mind.

Speaker 1 (29:09):
But yeah, I really can't wait to eat some I
think I might have. I've been craving chicken, but my
favorite part about eating chicken is genuinely just chewing on
the bones. Like I'm not kidding, it's so fun. Like
to me, steak isn't that appetizing because it's not like
a game like.

Speaker 2 (29:23):
I like foods that are like foods that leave evidence
behind are criminal, like a shell after eating a fucking
clam or whatever the fuck, or like a bone left
on a plate, like seeing a plate of bones, like skinning.
It's literally evil, Like it's so fucking creepy seeing bones
all over the world.

Speaker 1 (29:43):
Like the full fried fish that you have to like
clow with your.

Speaker 2 (29:48):
Hams the skeleton in the school.

Speaker 1 (29:50):
Yeah, and you have to put a lime or something
all over it to make the skin a little like
softer so it's easier to fucking tear it open. And
then you almost choke on the bone. And at the restaurant,
but it's okay. The waiters don't even bad an eye.
Everyone almost chokes on the fish here. It's a thing.

Speaker 2 (30:09):
Oh my god, No, I'm laughing every single chew of
that gum. Yeah, I mean, show a sm r. Let's
drink our buzzballs.

Speaker 1 (30:20):
Isn't it illegal to drink in public? I say that
like I don't smoke weed everywhere.

Speaker 2 (30:26):
I go on this world, on this world, this is
my second buzzball ever in my entire life.

Speaker 1 (30:32):
I'm not kidding. I don't think I've ever had.

Speaker 2 (30:34):
A buzzball this is my second one, and.

Speaker 1 (30:36):
I'm really bummed that we're not having a cutwater.

Speaker 2 (30:39):
Like I wanted so bad.

Speaker 1 (30:42):
Beers fucking dummies like we saw that started because we
literally saw.

Speaker 2 (30:47):
I saw Steve Lacy drinking them, and I was like, oh,
I want one of those so bad.

Speaker 1 (30:52):
I saw TikTok of a woman telling an awful story
that I'm really sorry about.

Speaker 2 (31:01):
Oh cheers. Wait, y'all are fucking crazy people.

Speaker 1 (31:12):
Actually, okay, this one isn't like the worst.

Speaker 2 (31:16):
This is maybe the worst.

Speaker 1 (31:26):
Oh hell no, dude. Oh wait, guys, guys, guys, guys,
wicked when we could come out soon, that's what we
could talk about.

Speaker 2 (31:39):
Also, we can talk about Rain's performance.

Speaker 1 (31:42):
Oh my god, I felt like a happy mother and
I cried because we'll insert the clip I'm talking into
the buzzball like it's the mind.

Speaker 2 (31:51):
Will insert the clip of Rain that I got. Also,
her drummer was quite possibly the coolest person I've ever
seen in my life. Y'all are crazy for these. By
the way, I know I'm not finishing that.

Speaker 1 (32:06):
Well, if you finish it, you'll be blackout.

Speaker 2 (32:08):
I'm finishing it.

Speaker 1 (32:11):
Oh my god, guys, it's seriously beautiful.

Speaker 2 (32:14):
Me just being like I'm teetering on the edge of
alcoholism and then opening a buzzball and drinking it. Don't
be concerned, y'all.

Speaker 1 (32:21):
Dude. You know what's funny is like the only time
I think I ever have been like okay, because of course,
people will always have their assumptions about people online, But
the video of you knocked out on the sidewalk, the
discourse over that, some people talk about me like I
literally like I roofed you and put you on the side.

Speaker 2 (32:43):
Well, no, it was giving bad friend.

Speaker 1 (32:45):
Yeah. Well yeah, guys, it was giving twenty two year
old Like no, it was literally like twenty yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (32:53):
I haven't seen the discourse of that, but I can
imagine what they're saying is.

Speaker 1 (32:58):
Like when it lands on like a random side of
the internet, which is like understandable. Also, actually, maybe I
can reframe this. I can reframe this. It's kind of
sweet to know that most people now are under the
common knowledge taking alcohol poisoning is actually deathly serious and to.

Speaker 2 (33:17):
Take it more serious and the fucking hospital did not
give a fuck.

Speaker 1 (33:20):
I mean, yeah, because you but it would it have
been fine. You definitely needed that IV. You need it
that though you need it that though the thing.

Speaker 2 (33:28):
Is you need that, though you needed that, though the
thing is like laying there, I wish I could recreate
that feeling because like no, no, no, no, Like you
know how you can get addicted to bad things like masochism,
Like the feeling of like screaming inside your head and

(33:48):
not coming out of your mouth. Is that I'm literally
just describing a K hole, Like that's literally what that is. Like,
never been in a K hole, but I'm imagining that's
what it is. I never forget David Dobrick coming into
an elevator and accusing us of doing ketamine and then
being like, bro, it's like you have marshmallows for feet,
And I was like, girl, I will never do that

(34:09):
ship in my life? What is the fucking point of ketamine?
Sorry now I'm just going on a tangent, but like,
I really don't down sideways like that it's described as
sideways sideways? Does that like uppers bring you up, downers
bring you down? Ketmine makes you go sideways. I'm like,
I don't want to be like the botomy.

Speaker 1 (34:26):
Neutral modea like why would you?

Speaker 2 (34:28):
Okay, see now what it's like associative, so it makes
you dissociated.

Speaker 1 (34:32):
Why why are people doing that to go out? Does
it make it like? Does this?

Speaker 2 (34:38):
Guys, if you've done comm or done ketamine, if you've
done a comment, if you've done a comment, leave ketymine
in my podcket.

Speaker 1 (34:48):
Yeah. No, I can't really. I don't really understand it.

Speaker 2 (34:52):
Isn't it crazy that I'm gay?

Speaker 1 (34:54):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (34:55):
It actually like it literally is insane.

Speaker 1 (34:57):
It is the older It's like, no, it's dead serious.

Speaker 2 (35:00):
It's deadly. It's deadly serious. We were out last night
with a buddy and he looked at me and he
was like, tonight was like the first night I saw
you and you were gay in my head and I
was like why.

Speaker 1 (35:12):
I was like what.

Speaker 2 (35:12):
Also, the buddy is the cameraman and he's crying. But no,
he looked at me in my face and was like, oh,
it's just like I saw your face. And I was like, oh,
he's actually gay. And I was like, oh, so I
have gay face. Now I have gay face.

Speaker 1 (35:25):
That's crazy. Is I remember that whole conversation. I don't
think I said a thing. I was just like I
just remember looking out the window and it's just like.

Speaker 2 (35:33):
Banging your head on the window.

Speaker 1 (35:35):
Like sitting in a car watching the world go.

Speaker 2 (35:37):
By, guys, the drink set, Lexenboorough or whatever, the gay
bar and Green Point or wherever the fuck we were.

Speaker 1 (35:44):
Like Jesus Christ, you need where did your notebook go?
You had that notebook? Why don't you write down where
you've been? You should at the end of the day
write down in your notes everywhere you've been. You can actually, okay, No,
it's not about being cut learn like I guess I'm
you're You're really good. I don't want anybody to take
away from You're just geographically.

Speaker 2 (36:07):
It'll be a problem, I hope.

Speaker 1 (36:08):
Yeah, you were geographically disassociated, and it's a really big problem,
mainly for the fact that you one hundred percent will
have dementia. I sadly assume a lot of people will
from like vapes and everything that we do to ourselves
and all the bad things. But you're definitely gonna be
like a runner. No, yeah, like you're gonna be the

(36:32):
kind of guy like I'm going to the store, but
you've never known where the store was.

Speaker 2 (36:36):
Yeah, Like that's true. And then I'm gonna be found
like face first in a ditch, like by like a
younger like thirty year old, and they're gonna be like, hey,
are you okay, and be like, yeah, I'm at the
grocery store. I'm good. I'm literally chill.

Speaker 1 (36:50):
I'm at the grocery store. You're literally you would never
be at the grocery store.

Speaker 2 (36:57):
No, because I don't dream of food, you know how
people don't dream of labor. The rats are out, The
fucking rats are out.

Speaker 1 (37:05):
Oh hell yeah, guys. If I'm gonna be actually, I
am to be honest. I have nothing to say because
times are not lit right now. And if anybody's been
around for a long time, of course, you know my

(37:27):
upbringing and whatnot, and very happily. I got to see
my dad this weekend, and it weirdly just made me
super stressed. So that's what I've been up to, but
not stressed, like it was sad to see him. I
love my dad and I love spending time with him
because he's also the funniest person on the planet.

Speaker 2 (37:50):
But yeah, god, your dad's gay.

Speaker 1 (37:52):
My dad is pretty gay.

Speaker 2 (37:54):
He like pointed to my issy mijoki jacket and was like,
is that issy? And I was like yeah, I was like,
how the fuck do you know that? And then I realized, oh,
that's a gay man. But I have a gay dad too.

Speaker 1 (38:04):
Yeah. Should we hope our d the best people have
gay dads. You know what's a fucked up thing is
like I would never want I feel like all of
our friends and even people watching everyone has like the
parent that's like, unless you just buy chance have two
INTROVERSI has.

Speaker 2 (38:20):
Me fucked up.

Speaker 1 (38:22):
Wait?

Speaker 2 (38:22):
I love alcohol. Hey, let's go get more drinks.

Speaker 1 (38:27):
Oh no, no, no, I can't wait to have chicken
and eat bones tonight. I literally like, I'm not kidding.
If I could have a meal that like in the
middle of it, I'm.

Speaker 2 (38:36):
Like pies and thighs and it's like bones and stuff.

Speaker 1 (38:41):
That's what I want.

Speaker 2 (38:41):
Bones and all. Okay, Timothy Shallow you know wait, okay
Timothy s and Tyler?

Speaker 1 (38:48):
Wait?

Speaker 2 (38:48):
Was Tyler in bones and all?

Speaker 1 (38:51):
No?

Speaker 2 (38:51):
Taylor Russell the rat just ran past again.

Speaker 1 (38:56):
Funk. What was I gonna say? What was I gonna say? Forgot?

Speaker 2 (39:00):
Who's Tyler? Oh? Water, make me swim, make me wait
me when I'm looking at the Hudson.

Speaker 1 (39:07):
Bad And last night he was like all day said,
he was like, let's go dance, Let's go.

Speaker 2 (39:11):
I wanted to dance. Wait, what can a girl not
want to dance?

Speaker 1 (39:15):
What if you change your flight? Okay, now that you've
had a little alcohol in your system, let me sell
you this image that you're gonna hate.

Speaker 2 (39:22):
You're so we're not gonna got this. You're gonna there's
nowhere to do. You don't wanna know the thing, there's
nowhere to dance about New York?

Speaker 1 (39:29):
The thing about New York because you don't even know
where the nine is gonna. Thank you. You got outside
and it's like literally high on it. Yeah, and that's
why people come here. You could just like expand your
world tenfold ten.

Speaker 2 (39:47):
Okay, Wait, the Hudson Bay is giving Tyler, make.

Speaker 1 (39:53):
Me swim, make me hut damn water. So fucking beautiful.
I actually can't believe how quickly they got this city built.
I know.

Speaker 2 (40:01):
Also like it's scary how quickly the lights turned on. Okay, wait,
so how did they all in Unison turn the lights.

Speaker 1 (40:13):
Onto the New York Is there a law that everybody
has to turn their lights on at a certain time?
Because every light just is like on now, just kind
of naturally. It's so weird.

Speaker 2 (40:21):
This is beautiful, Yeah, it is really beautiful. Wait, it's
crazy that on this podcast, we can literally do whatever
the fuck we want, Like we can put out the
shittiest episode of all time and like people won't listen
and that's okay, but like we're allowed to do that.

Speaker 1 (40:40):
I oh, oh my god, wait I said something really
amazing that religious people would hate to hear.

Speaker 2 (40:48):
Oh be careful, because be careful because the three am
religious psychosis. It was actually no drunk.

Speaker 1 (40:57):
Oh okay, next put I am too, because I'm ignoring,
Like we're doing the thing now that we're drunk.

Speaker 2 (41:05):
It's like, and guess what, I'm ignoring everything you're saying
famous famously, I'm two SIPs phillips.

Speaker 1 (41:15):
Oh yeah, you are two SIPs phillips. Yeah. What were
we saying before that? What were we saying?

Speaker 2 (41:21):
You have religious psychosis?

Speaker 1 (41:24):
I said, next time somebody says God is not a woman, saying, yeah,
she isn't, because a woman would never take on a
job that she knows she can't do. Only a man would.

Speaker 2 (41:35):
Oh wow, oh we almost guys, we've never we've never
for real kissed ever.

Speaker 1 (41:45):
Yeah, we're like saving it like fucking Mormons or something.

Speaker 2 (41:47):
It's like really weak, no, because it will be special.
We're gonna start building the hype. Now, yeah, we're.

Speaker 1 (41:53):
Gonna start building the four play is what we mean.
We want. We want to build up the tension between
this kiss so much that by the time we actually
get to kissing, it's like, oh my god, that's it.

Speaker 2 (42:03):
When we kiss. Are we going to kiss or are
we going to make out?

Speaker 1 (42:05):
I'm not putting your tongue in my mouth and vice versa. Wait,
why I just can't.

Speaker 2 (42:09):
I can't really, I feel like.

Speaker 1 (42:11):
We passed that. It's too funny. Like I just I
can't even see know it's ridiculous.

Speaker 2 (42:16):
It's like literally ridiculous. It's like, should we kiss right now?

Speaker 1 (42:21):
It's too funny?

Speaker 2 (42:22):
Kiss me? Where'd you babe? Where'd you go?

Speaker 1 (42:25):
Hey?

Speaker 2 (42:26):
Hey, where'd you go? I'm right here, I'm here for you.

Speaker 1 (42:30):
I'm right here.

Speaker 2 (42:33):
Like a bit that me and then you do all
the time is when one of us like dissociate. We
just grab where'd you go?

Speaker 1 (42:40):
Where'd you go? Wait?

Speaker 2 (42:44):
What are other bits?

Speaker 1 (42:45):
We do?

Speaker 2 (42:46):
All the time?

Speaker 1 (42:48):
We fake fight the most in public. That's kind of
like you know what.

Speaker 2 (42:54):
Is like some of our fake fights like are what
we really want to say? But it's like guy as
a bit and like wash our hands move on like
it's never real. I mean, yeah, like but that's awesome.

Speaker 1 (43:11):
Like well, because it's just not worth the like because
I think most of the time when that happens, it's
we're both just frustrated for no reason. Day Like, I
was frustrated and.

Speaker 2 (43:20):
I ran and got us buzzballs. See how I cure
her frustration. See how I provide for my girl when
she's sad. I get her alcohol.

Speaker 1 (43:29):
You got me alcohol. Thank you. I was saying, my
head was hurting because I haven't had it, and she was.

Speaker 2 (43:35):
Like shaking, and I was like, oh, she's getting the
alcohol shakes. So I got her.

Speaker 1 (43:39):
So I have to get some alcohol. Many pe