David Letterman and Jim Downey

Burak from Istanbul, Turkey needs help writing a fan letter to celebrated late night writer Steve O’Donnell. Robert calls on the expertise of Steve’s former co-workers, Late Night and SNL legend Jim Downey and our next guest who needs no introduction, David Letterman.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
This week on Humor Me.

Speaker 2 (00:02):
Hey you, Robert, huge fan. Myotis might be weird as
a request, but I'm trying to send an email to a.

Speaker 3 (00:10):
Colleague of yours, Steve o'donald.

Speaker 1 (00:12):
Former head writer otis Steve o'donald, and.

Speaker 3 (00:16):
I'm trying to make it as funny as possible.

Speaker 1 (00:18):
I've brought in a couple of people who have worked
with Steve o'donald. So can we cut to the first
My first guest, I'm going to help you. Did you
see him? That's Jim Downe by Barack. Now, I brought
one other person who worked on this Late Night with
David Letterman show. Can we pan and show him there?
That's by Barack. This is Dave from Indianapolis.

Speaker 4 (00:45):
I can you tell the three of us here a
little bit about yourself? For example, do you have a family, Barack?

Speaker 3 (00:52):
I have a brother?

Speaker 5 (00:54):
Am okay?

Speaker 4 (00:57):
Are you currently appearing on Broadway?

Speaker 5 (01:04):
Cuor Me?

Speaker 1 (01:07):
I need some jokes to make me seem funny humor Me.
My wit is lacking to the m's degree. Hi, everybody,
this is Humor Me. I want to thank you for listening,
or especially for watching. Given my face. If you haven't

(01:28):
seen the show before. This is a place where we
put our guests to work a little bit kind of
the Byron Allan formula.

Speaker 6 (01:37):
Go wrong man.

Speaker 1 (01:38):
Yeah, where we help somebody who needs help in making
a speech or making a job presentation, something like that.
And I call on very funny people help me help them.
So yes, Byron Allan, same idea. I sit back, they
do all the work.

Speaker 5 (01:53):
Byron Allen worth several billion dollars. I just like to
always mention.

Speaker 1 (01:57):
That and very generous in the world that he unleashes comedians.

Speaker 5 (02:02):
Yeah, that's right.

Speaker 1 (02:04):
You shouldn't.

Speaker 4 (02:04):
As a friend of mine said, you should see the
ones who are leashed, because get ready and hang on.

Speaker 1 (02:12):
That's a totally different show. Well, let me introduce my
guest to my extreme left is Jim Downey, well known
for one battle after another. You've seen him in the
Chair Company and there will be blood. And he also
dabbles in writing. Understand and this gentleman right here, I'm Dave.
Dave from Indianapolis, Indianapolis, Indiana.

Speaker 5 (02:34):
Correct, there you go, Speedway, No nut Speedway, but Speedway a.

Speaker 4 (02:42):
Suburb to the west of Indianapolis. Sorry, that's all right,
none need to apologize.

Speaker 1 (02:47):
Dave is very funny. He's been on television for many years.

Speaker 5 (02:52):
I had a show.

Speaker 1 (02:52):
Yeah, I had show.

Speaker 5 (02:54):
Jim and I worked together.

Speaker 1 (02:55):
Listen, this is okay, enough with the hilarity. I'm gonna
I'm going to break a few rules on this episode.
Usually I try not to do what every podcast does,
which is a lot of excessive complimenting back.

Speaker 4 (03:11):
Yes, I admire that, but I will say thank you
for having me as part of this. I'm here for
the supreme reason that I love being on TV, and
I wish you and I had worked together. I've only
known of you since my working days are behind me,
and I wish you and I had a relationship.

Speaker 5 (03:32):
He and I have a relationship.

Speaker 1 (03:34):
I want to talk about it.

Speaker 5 (03:35):
Yeah, anyway, thank you very much, and thank you. I.

Speaker 1 (03:40):
Like I said, I'm going to break my no compliments rule.

Speaker 5 (03:43):
Well, let's just break it. No, don't break it. No,
let's don't do it.

Speaker 1 (03:46):
It's going to be really hard.

Speaker 4 (03:47):
But let me ask you about the puppet where from
Where have you talked about where that came from?

Speaker 1 (03:51):
Well, again, I'm going to do this. I'm going to
answer this as best I can without complimenting.

Speaker 5 (03:56):
Well, in the world of puppets, that seems.

Speaker 1 (03:58):
Going to happen. Well, the fact is that the puppet
of which he's speaking, Triumph, the insult comedy would not
exist if it were not for your show. And I'll
explain why very quickly. Because this I don't want to
mark Marin you. We want to make it about me.
But since you asked, when we started the Late Night
with Conan O'Brien show took your place at NBC, I

(04:22):
was the head writer, and I was obsessed with not
doing what you. I loved Conan. I thought he was
incredibly funny, and I was excited to work for him.
But I constantly reminded Conan and the crew can't do
anything that Dave's ever done because we'll be compared. We
were already terrified of me. We wanted to change the
show NAT, we wanted to call it Night Night with

(04:44):
Conan O'Brien, anything to avoid comparison. So one of the
many things, probably the dumbest thing I did, was I
told Conan no remote sing. Yeah, it's turned out to
be the thing that he does best. Yeah, I told
him no, Dave did it. You know other people have
tried to copy Dave. Pat say, Jack, did you see
him try if Jack didn't do it? What do you

(05:06):
think you? Who do you think?

Speaker 5 (05:07):
You're so sorry? I brought up the puppet. Let's just
keep going.

Speaker 1 (05:13):
Okay, I'm just telling you this is.

Speaker 5 (05:15):
Thank you, thank you trying. I'm just saying I wish
you and I had buddied up earlier in our lives.

Speaker 1 (05:20):
Okay, but now let's keep going. I got to finish
the story of the floor. No, it's you had on
Westminster Dogs in nineteen nine.

Speaker 5 (05:29):
Oh yeah, yeah, the winners of the Dogs.

Speaker 1 (05:31):
Where you were in the Insullivent Theater now and you
were playing with the environment found comedy. I was like,
we can't do any phone com So the dogs would
run up and down the aisles and it was hilarious,
and I thought, let's do Westminster. But let's get puppets.
Let's get puppets to perform and have various talents. This

(05:52):
puppet can sing the theme from the Bodyguard. This puppet
can light its own farts.

Speaker 2 (05:58):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (05:58):
The best was a puppet who was a Jack Nicholson impersonated.
So I actually had the puppet put his palm over
his forehead like every hackey Jack Nicholson, I am Jack.
They all talked with the Russian accent. Anyway, eventually we
did triumph Wow, like four years later.

Speaker 5 (06:15):
Wow.

Speaker 4 (06:16):
Well, let me just have a curiosity about the talents
that puppets do in the room.

Speaker 5 (06:21):
Was that a difficult cell? Or was that yes, where
we go, that's what we're doing.

Speaker 6 (06:28):
You kind of skipped quickly past. And of course they
all had Russian accents. That's the thing that.

Speaker 1 (06:35):
That's because when I was ten years old, dogs had
Russian accents in my head because I had Russian grandparents,
because my mom was like generation immigrant. Yes, and they
would talk to me like a little bit, like a
little kid, like hello, how are you?

Speaker 5 (06:53):
You know?

Speaker 1 (06:54):
And dogs have innocent faces. And the worst thing I
have ever said about this is the dog faces remind
me of like the face of an immigrant who's just
gotten off the boat in ls Island.

Speaker 5 (07:07):
And we'll assume that's flattering.

Speaker 1 (07:14):
Okay, I'm gonna stop talking about Trump. I want to
ask you something. But did you hear that Conan talked
about an appearance the first time he was on your show,
maybe it was the second. He was on Jimmy Kimmel recently,
and he told this story about we were brainstorming the
show had just started, and he said, what if I

(07:34):
go on Dave's show and I'm really animated and I'm
in the middle of really entertaining anecdote and then all
of a sudden, I just freeze and literally hold his
face and not break And here's the picture that on
the Kimmel Show.

Speaker 5 (07:49):
Oh so this would have been on my show, this
would be this was your idea.

Speaker 1 (07:54):
No, no, it was his idea.

Speaker 5 (07:55):
It was his idea.

Speaker 1 (07:56):
It was his idea. And as he tells it on
the Kimmel Show, he's like, Robert was insistent that I
do it, But I was like, oh my god.

Speaker 4 (08:04):
How far into the sit down? Might this have been?
Like a minute?

Speaker 5 (08:07):
Two minutes immediately?

Speaker 1 (08:10):
Probably two minutes?

Speaker 5 (08:11):
And how long would he hold that?

Speaker 1 (08:13):
He would never have broken down?

Speaker 5 (08:15):
So I wonder the awkwardness is all on me?

Speaker 1 (08:18):
Yes, And he went in the.

Speaker 5 (08:20):
Beauty of it.

Speaker 1 (08:22):
Well, years later, you did something that blew his mind
when Joaquin Phoenix was on. Oh my, when Joaquin Phoenix
was on and he was in his alter ego for
that documentary was doing with the beer the bizarre Yes,
And Dave was hilarious all the way through the interview,
but at the very end, he said, well, I'm sorry
you couldn't be here today. I remember that, and I

(08:45):
remember Conan just I could never do it. Oh, I
could never think of it.

Speaker 5 (08:50):
Oh, just a low key.

Speaker 1 (08:53):
Matter of fact.

Speaker 4 (08:54):
This is fascinating to me because recently we learned that
an astronaut on the space had to come home for
medical reasons. And the medical reason heretofore unheard of in
the world of medicine, could not talk, just stopped talking.
Not not neurological, not muscular for some reason. The impairment

(09:15):
was He's fine now.

Speaker 1 (09:16):
He wasn't frozen though, No, he was.

Speaker 4 (09:19):
He was doing to get home apparently.

Speaker 5 (09:24):
Well that's great. I'm sorry now that didn't happen.

Speaker 1 (09:27):
See, I think that's a part of me thought like
it's some point Dave would have figured out how to
handle this.

Speaker 5 (09:32):
I'm going to do it now.

Speaker 1 (09:33):
Please do it to Conan the next time you're on.
Oh god, I'm not capable of handling.

Speaker 5 (09:43):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (09:44):
Thank cute bit, cute bit. I would love for you
to do it to Cone in the well again.

Speaker 4 (09:49):
I love being here with Jim and I'm well, no,
and it's fun. I think you and I have a
great commonality heretofore unexplored or experienced, and I'm sorry about that.

Speaker 5 (09:59):
Well, by the way, do we have time forth? I'm
not hanging.

Speaker 4 (10:05):
But I think from my experience with Jim, there there
are two things that to me kind of a are
his signature. One was the bank that makes change change
Bank change, just unbelievable time, the silliness, the stupidity, the dedication,
the devotion to that idea, but the simplicity of it

(10:27):
is just genius, all day, every day.

Speaker 5 (10:31):
Uh. And then the other thing, which I can't remember.

Speaker 6 (10:35):
Maybe there was only the one.

Speaker 5 (10:37):
No, there was there was one. It just has gone away.
Now it'll come back. Don't worry about it, Jim.

Speaker 1 (10:41):
There was something in Jim's documentary that that bothered me
a little bit, which was at some point someone said
something like I wouldn't hire Jim to manage my, you know,
my lawn, or something like he like trying to make
a compliment that Jim's a brilliant writer, which he is,
but I thought he was amazing and beautiful manager of

(11:03):
people's personalities. I was like twenty five when I got there,
and what he was amazing at doing as a head
writer was handling bad ideas and making you feel like
you're not a complete loser like he would. He would
make you feel like you could do better, as opposed
to like forgive me, but the al Franken approached, the.

Speaker 5 (11:27):
L Franktt approach. Yeah, unambiguous.

Speaker 1 (11:36):
Well to delight in being funny regardless of the collateral damage.

Speaker 5 (11:43):
Okay, yeah, you gotta know.

Speaker 1 (11:45):
Yeah. Whereas Jim you know, took the role seriously. He
had incredibly high standards. He would call things that's kind
of a first thought idea.

Speaker 6 (11:53):
Yeah, that would probably be the harshest I would get.
The other was the you remember when we had when
John Candy was on it and there was a wasp
nest in the in this set, and I remembered the
thing with you was you would very often I would
try to talk here to doing things that you would laugh.

(12:13):
You would laugh, laugh and go like I'm not going
to do and then while yes, but this one was
because Candy was great at like just playing the Dave,
can we kill the sound? I'm sure that's a wash.

(12:34):
And then he did the thing where like, Dave, I'm
not going to move look on the back of my neck.

Speaker 5 (12:41):
And he's there and you're like, oh, my god.

Speaker 6 (12:43):
Yes, but you kind of warmed up to the bed
and then finally you were saying, John, we have people
who can take care of this.

Speaker 1 (12:52):
You don't need to.

Speaker 6 (12:52):
He goes, no, no, Dave, I want to do this,
and he went and got like a fogger and we
had a step ladder. And then I have this memory
of he kept coming back after the other guests and
he would he would come back in with like a
bee keeper's helmet, with a netting and everything.

Speaker 4 (13:13):
I have some low burning regret that I didn't say
yes to more of this sort of thing, because now,
when I envisioned myself participating in this just complete nonsense.

Speaker 1 (13:27):
It's delightful, But you were so young and probably vulnerable
because Conan. I had the same thing where sometimes I
would try to convince Conan of something and be shocked
that he didn't want to do it, and I would
have to be reminded that he's the one out there right.

Speaker 4 (13:43):
Yeah, but that trepidation, I think sometimes is enhanced artificially.

Speaker 1 (13:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 6 (13:49):
But I remember after I had left the show and
I was watching you through the velcrow suit. That was
a long more like holy shit, that was.

Speaker 1 (13:59):
You were like, oh now, Dave's really into this.

Speaker 6 (14:04):
I would not I would not have done that.

Speaker 1 (14:08):
Attribute to Steve Allen on something.

Speaker 4 (14:09):
Oh Steve Allen would do things like that getting out
of his car, But that particular thing was always a failure.
And the people, the harness people, who are the harnessed people,
that always it's a very well known family that does
harnesses for Broadway until the Melndsay brothers, something like that,
but anyway, they're very well known. And the idea was

(14:30):
I'm in the suit with the harness, and when I leap,
they harness me up. The idea was horizontal, not vertical,
but because of the meager momentum that I had generated
approaching the wall, I would always slam. And then once
I'm on the thing, they can't pull me up, and
this would irritate them to the point of they just

(14:52):
hated the bit. And then we're going to do it
at Radio City Musical on some anniversary thing, and now
it's going to be like, oh my god, he's going
fifty feet and the same goddamn thing happens, and I
get maybe eighteen inches off the ground and I'm just
stuck to the Oh no, So the whole thing never came
to fruition that it is so memorable.

Speaker 6 (15:13):
It was the perfect the way you just it's just.

Speaker 5 (15:18):
Solid. No, it didn't happen. Didn't happen.

Speaker 1 (15:22):
But the first time I actually met you was your
last show on NBC. Conan was on the ninth floor
where we had our offices, and I said, Conan, we
should go down, and I said you should go down
and pay your respects. It's Dave's last show. And he
was like, oh, yeah, no, that's a good idea. I said,
I'll go with you, and it wasn't. I really did

(15:43):
think he should pay his respect And so we're watching
from outside six A and it's an incredible show. You
wrap it up with a beautiful speech, gracious speech toward NBC.
Walks through the doors, sees Conan, and immediately you invite
us into your dressing room.

Speaker 5 (16:03):
So that this doesn't sound like me, Yeah, well.

Speaker 1 (16:08):
You were always very generous to Conan, and you saw
Conan and you said come on in. And then he
introduced me, and I immediately made you cringe by being
incredibly nerdy about the first time. I became a huge
fan of yours, Witches, and then I was like, you
were hosting the Tonight Show in June of nineteen eighty

(16:28):
or seventy nine, and Mackenzie Phillips was your guest, and
she was completely baffled by what you were saying, and
you and Ed McMahon were just laughing on either side
of her, and I was like, this is the greatest
thing I've ever seen. And what I wanted to ask
you was who, because you were a great stand up already,

(16:50):
but you weren't like super famous as a stand up,
And so I was wondering, was it Johnny who was like,
I think he should get a shot at hosting? Was Peters,
who was a.

Speaker 4 (17:00):
Longtime producer with Freddie Decorda and Johnny. They had worked together,
the three of them for a long time, and I
think Peter actually worked in radio, but I don't know
if that included Johnny, but he had been in broadcasting
forever and had worked with Johnny forever.

Speaker 5 (17:17):
And it was Peter who was kind to me.

Speaker 4 (17:21):
And it was through that relationship that I got to
be on the Tonight Show. But boy, I mean, you
talk about McKenzie Phillips, you talk about Ed McMahon.

Speaker 5 (17:30):
I almost don't remember that.

Speaker 1 (17:32):
For those who for those in the audience who didn't
serve in Vietnam. Mackenzie Phillips was a sitcom star in
the seventies and the daughter for those who served in Korea,
The Mamas and the Mama's papa's John Phillips.

Speaker 4 (17:47):
But it's truly amazing because well, I'm only speaking for
myself and other people have their own version of life.

Speaker 5 (17:54):
But it's every day when you get out of bed.

Speaker 4 (17:57):
In your head, it's all about you getting out of bed,
and you're going through your day and then you're going
to bed.

Speaker 5 (18:03):
And then after you stop doing.

Speaker 4 (18:04):
That, you realize, oh my god, there's a whole giant
world around that cares nothing for my schedule, and it's
just it's just just a wisp of a memory.

Speaker 1 (18:16):
I guess.

Speaker 5 (18:16):
No, it's true, right, yes, exactly, thank you.

Speaker 1 (18:20):
Okay, I'm gonna take your word.

Speaker 5 (18:22):
And it'll happen to you in Triumph one day.

Speaker 1 (18:25):
I'm I still have my kids at my home, and
I think the second they leave, which is September, that
that's going to start.

Speaker 5 (18:35):
Going off to school. Is that what? And you've not
been through that, that's tough for you. Well, this is
a typical old man cond.

Speaker 1 (18:45):
Oh my god, yeacts.

Speaker 6 (18:48):
In fact, my granddaughter was born. We did the Radio
City concert, I think, yeah, I remember that, and then
the fiftieth anniversary show, which I know I saw you
on Sunday, and my granddaughter was born on the Saturday between.

Speaker 5 (19:04):
The whoa how about that? Yeah? So she is like,
but you had an eyepatch? Right?

Speaker 6 (19:08):
Was an eyepatch I had? I had fallen on the
stage dangerously overloaded with wiring stage at Radio City, and
that's a rehearsing a thing with with Bill Murray. So
I decided the doctor said like, Okay, this is going
to look pretty bad before it starts to look better.

(19:29):
And so it overnight it turned like black purple. And
so I just went out and got an eye patch.
And then people, anyone who came up to me, and
you know, come on, what.

Speaker 5 (19:40):
Looking bad before it looks better is also the theme
of today's show.

Speaker 1 (19:43):
Seriously, I just left here the eye patch.

Speaker 4 (19:46):
Do you remember what our conversation was that night? I
had gone to that gathering for the specific person purpose
of seeing Lord Michaels, just to thank him and get
the hell out of there.

Speaker 5 (19:56):
I looked for him for ninety minutes and could never
find him. No, never found him, and.

Speaker 1 (20:00):
I would use people to surround him.

Speaker 4 (20:02):
Absolutely, I guess. And I'm now jumpy to get home,
and I see you and your girlfriend and you.

Speaker 5 (20:07):
Get the eyepatch and I went up and I said.

Speaker 4 (20:10):
Look, Jim, I'd love to stay here and talk to you.
I just don't have time for your stories tonight. I got.

Speaker 1 (20:17):
Well, I want to ask you about one other is
you talk about how you wish you could have committed
more to crazy bits like the.

Speaker 6 (20:24):
Well no, Dave, Dave committed No.

Speaker 5 (20:26):
I know, yes, I.

Speaker 1 (20:27):
Wish you'd done.

Speaker 4 (20:28):
I think that was about ninety percent of stuff that
was submitted. I should have had a higher strike rate
in that category.

Speaker 1 (20:36):
But I want to point out something that you committed
to years later that people should know about more. They
would stage. They would have fake Broadway musicals and he
would introduce them. This is around the late nineties. I
think this was yes, Yes, And he would introduce the
cast of a new Broadway musical and they would and

(20:58):
it would be completely fake mm hmm, but so believable.
Like Paul would write the music, I didn't put it together.

Speaker 4 (21:07):
And because from time to time we would have an
actual segment from a Broadway musical on the show.

Speaker 1 (21:11):
Yeah, yeah, and never ever acknowledged that it was fake,
and there was no giveaway joke. Everything was just a
little bit cornier that it should.

Speaker 5 (21:23):
You might question it, but probably you didn't, because I
don't think anybody knew the difference or cared about the difference.

Speaker 1 (21:29):
And then then the other thing that I heard that
was hilarious. This is the I think Rodney Rothman told
this story the Jay Leno's talent booker called the theater
producer or something.

Speaker 4 (21:39):
Yes, one of the phony musicals. I wanted to know
what Wait a minute, what happened? How did this look through?

Speaker 5 (21:44):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (21:45):
How did you not tell us about this? Why did
Dave get it poor? All right? I guess it's not
too late.

Speaker 5 (21:52):
By the way, my memory of that is people hated.

Speaker 1 (21:55):
That not nerdy comedy.

Speaker 5 (21:58):
All right?

Speaker 1 (21:59):
There, you know, that's the point, that's what you're saying,
that the stuff that you like, you had, that's how.

Speaker 6 (22:06):
You had extremely high standards, and you always thought the audience,
you know, you could have done better or whatever, well,
and you it.

Speaker 4 (22:14):
Was the only way of knowing if the audience was
completely silent like they are now watching this.

Speaker 6 (22:19):
Sometimes there's people just going, oh my god, this is great.

Speaker 1 (22:24):
And it's the internet.

Speaker 5 (22:28):
Having this conversation.

Speaker 4 (22:29):
I almost wish I could have another shot at this
when I was in my early thirties. It seems like
my well now I think I but then again, you
realize TV is of a sort of withering in this regard.

Speaker 1 (22:40):
Oh yeah, it's tragic. I'm so grateful to add your
show to know.

Speaker 4 (22:47):
But then you got to work with a genius of
Conan for God's sake.

Speaker 1 (22:51):
No, it's the greatest job I ever had, even though
I got burned out. Like Jim, we both left after years.
Though I wonder why that.

Speaker 5 (22:58):
He didn't get burned out.

Speaker 1 (23:00):
He got he got to go, yeah, well, I you know,
I left for you get burned out. He didn't get
burned The writer is a burnout kind of job.

Speaker 5 (23:11):
Well, also, you.

Speaker 6 (23:12):
Know that that I sort of felt that, you know
that the the show eats to a lot of ideas
because you know, it's very idea heavy, and we're doing
you know, five shows a week, or do.

Speaker 1 (23:27):
We do four or five?

Speaker 5 (23:28):
I we only did four because they had Friday Night videos,
that's Friday Night.

Speaker 6 (23:36):
That I never one hundred percent sure that we we
did four or five. But but we sort of I
got to a point where, like, boy, I've I've thought,
I've I can't think. It's harder, harder for me to
think up new ideas.

Speaker 5 (23:52):
Well.

Speaker 1 (23:52):
It's also like when you're a head writer, you're managing
everybody else. Yeah, you don't have time to think.

Speaker 4 (23:57):
Also, if things go well, you're more into to say
yes to stuff in a pitch after that show. If
things don't go well, you're less inclined to say yes.
This reminds me of one fantastic story. There was a
man who wanted to write on the show. And you
had known him because he from Chicago, and he went
on to work on the Sportswelder. Yeah, and one one day,

(24:20):
after having pitched him to me and pitched him to me,
you came with a postcard and you said, here, listen
to this, I think this guy should be on the show.

Speaker 5 (24:28):
Tell him what the joke was. Well, the joke was.

Speaker 6 (24:30):
It's one of my favorite jokes ever. It was let's say,
Robert Smigel. That wasn't the name, but Robert Smigel's much
publicized effort to break every record in the Guinness Book
of Records got off to a rocky start. This week
when his recording of White Christmas sold only fires. First

(24:52):
of all, the confident length of the thing. Yes, it's
just that's my kind of And he just sent that
as a postcard. Wow, And I remembered, you know, and
this is the part we've talked about.

Speaker 5 (25:08):
Well.

Speaker 6 (25:09):
Well for some reason now I've since heard from John
indirectly that he goes well. I did think I included
an address, but definitely with the postcard there was no address.
And so this is nineteen eighty three, and I was
going to the New York Public Library reference room where
they have telephone directory from all across the country. I'm
starting with like like Akron, Ohio, and working my way

(25:32):
through to Zayanesville and looking for schwartzwelders. Luckily was it,
and I found like a cluster of them in suburban
like Seattlers, which is it turns out he's from like Renton,
Washington or some place near Seattle. And so, and I
got his mother and she said, oh, that's my son.
He's working for an advertising in Chicago.

Speaker 5 (25:54):
How long did this take you to run him down?

Speaker 6 (25:56):
It probably a couple of weekends or something was dedicated.
And we got him ount and he made.

Speaker 1 (26:04):
It was just a very awkward impress.

Speaker 5 (26:06):
He frightened me, and I'm guessing it was because the
show had not gone well. So now I'm interviewing this
guy or chatting with this guy wasn't really an interview.
And there's something about him I found menacing, which is
probably not right.

Speaker 6 (26:17):
No, he's a wonderful guy, but he's like six seventies something.

Speaker 1 (26:21):
He was through the whole room with him at SNL
and he was my first.

Speaker 6 (26:29):
There's you're not really supposed to smoke in any job interview.
Dave particularly had like, you know, certain boundaries and you
look over at me and you've got the baseball glove
and you're throwing them all you look over me and
just go.

Speaker 4 (26:45):
But see, on the other side of this, what had it?
What would it have been? Because the man went on
to be legendary as a comedy.

Speaker 6 (26:53):
Writer, say the greatest Simpsons Riders.

Speaker 5 (26:57):
Oh my god, well you're welcome America.

Speaker 1 (27:00):
He did look like a drifter, you know. I would
go to his house and he would play old baseball
games that he had videotape. He was a huge baseball fan.

Speaker 6 (27:09):
He was a great also a great baseball player. He
was a highly touted pitcher.

Speaker 5 (27:13):
Do you know where he had gone to school?

Speaker 6 (27:16):
Some high school near Seattle. That's all I can tell you.
Wow about that interesting character about it?

Speaker 1 (27:26):
Yeah, we'll get Yeah, give me the sign of.

Speaker 5 (27:30):
Your own business, right rank, get your own podcast.

Speaker 6 (27:33):
I want to ask him one more question about going
really well the bit.

Speaker 1 (27:37):
With I just didn't know why we were going to start. Okay,
it'll have Yeah, why not, we'll put it on our Patreon.
Do you believe people do that? And I have no
idea what they have podcasts and then they have something
called a Patreon account and it's like, for five dollars

(27:57):
a month, you'll get to see bonusman material like that
wasn't as good. So, speaking of bonus material, I just
wanted to ask you, so you also did a fake
boy band. It was called for Fresh Studios.

Speaker 5 (28:11):
It was the name of a kitty litter. I think
that's what turned out to be the name of a kid.
I think that's why people started saying maybe no.

Speaker 1 (28:19):
But they had them flash a website at the very
end of the second appearance because they wanted to see
how many people were. And then people wrote into this
website and some of them totally bought it and some
of the funniest one that I saw. I looked this
up and it was like when I saw you guys
on Letterman, I thought it was a joke. When I

(28:40):
was laughing because I thought it was funny, and then
I realized it was not a joke. How dare you?
I just feel sorry for you people? Wow?

Speaker 6 (28:51):
Yeah, okay, weren't some of the were any of the
people that you had playing, as you know cast members
of the Fake musical Lay are famous in their own right.

Speaker 1 (29:02):
Actually, somebody in the boy band Matthew Morrison. He became
a big well both a Broadway star and he was
the star of Glee.

Speaker 5 (29:09):
Really yeah, how about that? Well, see, you never read
about the nice things, Frank Sinatradeuz do you? You just don't?

Speaker 1 (29:18):
Do you remember we had and I got to get
the Peabody Awards on this.

Speaker 6 (29:22):
We had Alec Baldwin play.

Speaker 2 (29:25):
Oh.

Speaker 5 (29:25):
Yeah, he was the first time.

Speaker 6 (29:27):
He was on eighty three probably yeah, eighty two he
was on a soap opera. He's on the Doctors and
he knew he'd gone to school with Sandy Gillis. Yeah,
and I was saying, we need someone like a handsome
kind of leading man type, who's going I can't remember
what the bit was, but it was it was something

(29:47):
that he shows. It was totally committed, kind of bay
bitterness is eating you something like that.

Speaker 5 (29:55):
He was the guy and it was in the back
of the audience. He stood up and then erupted something
like that.

Speaker 6 (30:01):
Yeah, And Sandy said, I went to school with a
guy who'd be perfect that. He's really handsome. He just
got signed to a soap opera. And then years and
I remembered how funny he was. And years later when
I was producing and they were looking for a host,
they said, this guy Alec Baldwin, and I go, wait
a minute, I've worked with him. And then like eight
years early and he became one of the you know, one.

Speaker 1 (30:22):
Of the all time best hosts. How about that? Yeah, wow,
very good call the show? How about that? Yeah, Robert
would have been better, Robert Smigels, how about that?

Speaker 5 (30:37):
Really?

Speaker 1 (30:39):
Before I I can't believe I forgot this. As we're
taping this, Dave just had his birthday and I want
to get there and before we go on, this is
a couple of things. Humor me, thank you very much,
and also it's a beauty.

Speaker 5 (30:55):
What is that a five pounder.

Speaker 6 (30:57):
That's a hum dinger that one oh Humdinger.

Speaker 5 (30:59):
Puts out an I sports products. Yeah, and this is
thank you very much, Robert, Thank you very much.

Speaker 1 (31:07):
This is also free Birthday. This is stationary from Lester Holtz,
from the disk of official NBC Stationary.

Speaker 5 (31:15):
This is fantastic. I mean both of these. Is this.

Speaker 4 (31:17):
You may be silly about this, but I'll eat this.
Not on the way home, but I will eat this.

Speaker 5 (31:22):
This.

Speaker 4 (31:23):
This is a keepsake, my friend. Thank you very much.

Speaker 6 (31:25):
And you can open you can use that to open
a corporate account in his name, yes, and borrow against it.

Speaker 5 (31:31):
Yeah, bless you. Thank you very much for ham and stationary.

Speaker 1 (31:35):
Yeah, it's the least you could do.

Speaker 5 (31:36):
It's like Christmas morning. All right.

Speaker 1 (31:43):
Now that we got that out of the way, we're
going to start the actual purpose of the show, whatever
that is. I can't even remember. But we have someone from.

Speaker 5 (31:51):
Turkey Town in Turkey, Stan Bull.

Speaker 1 (31:54):
Okay, a good old deal. Yeah, okay. People leave messages
on the website on your Yeah, it's called speakpipe dot
com slash humor me. Here we go. Let's see what
he said.

Speaker 2 (32:06):
Hey, Robert, huge fand I not this might be weird
as a request. But I'm trying to send an email
to a colleague of yours, Steve O'Donnell, former head writer, wrote,
and I'm trying to make it as funny as possible
because I stupidly believe that if I make it as

(32:26):
funny as possible, or funnier than I can be, that
he might actually return to my email. So I think
you could help me, because you know the sensibility of
the comic writer as good as anyone. I think, or
you may be the most qualified person to actually they

(32:47):
have voice crack about that. You may be the most
qualified person alive to send this email requesting your help.

Speaker 5 (32:57):
There we go, so that you want to cut down
all this other stuff has been fine. Yeah, I don't
know what I understand, and I believe and I support
the premise, but I think what we're witnessing here is
the nascent stages of a crime crime. Yeah, he wants
to get to know Steve o'donald.

Speaker 1 (33:17):
Yes, well, he wants Steve o'donald. You're right, you may
he want he wants to give Steve o'donald the false
impression sure that he is worthy of Steve O'donald's attention.
So maybe we undermine well, well.

Speaker 6 (33:30):
One thing I'm going to tell you right now.

Speaker 1 (33:32):
Well, first, can I say one thing? How about that?
How about that?

Speaker 6 (33:37):
See it's a catchphrase, that's fine? How about that?

Speaker 1 (33:40):
Is Wade? You're committing a crime?

Speaker 5 (33:44):
Just a small sound effect?

Speaker 6 (33:46):
I would say, I would say, my first, we know Steve,
Steve end is going to answer his email regardless, answers
every email and lonely, so it could be doesn't need
to be that great.

Speaker 1 (34:01):
And I think.

Speaker 5 (34:04):
Answer is from Turkey, right am? I right about that?

Speaker 6 (34:07):
He's always loved Turkey.

Speaker 1 (34:10):
I know that.

Speaker 5 (34:11):
How does he feel about Ham?

Speaker 6 (34:13):
Ham?

Speaker 5 (34:13):
This is deteriorating so quickly.

Speaker 1 (34:17):
Family is from Ham? But he full circle joke?

Speaker 5 (34:24):
But do we trust the man? Honestly? It's just a
guy who answers a website thing? Is that what he did?
He thinks he want a contest or what is this?

Speaker 6 (34:31):
I think I think we kind of have to trust him,
don't we think?

Speaker 5 (34:35):
On the internet? Why wouldn't you?

Speaker 1 (34:37):
I mean a decent, entertaining h.

Speaker 5 (34:44):
I'm enjoying that good good so maybe we maybe that's okay?
So anyway, what is our responsibility here?

Speaker 1 (34:50):
Jim we're well, we're trying.

Speaker 6 (34:52):
I think, as I understand it, the premise of how
about that it's get it is to help help this
guy connect with Steve o'donald.

Speaker 1 (35:04):
Ultimately, I know it's a crime on some level, but
ultimately Steve will find out. Do you think it's an
immigration thing?

Speaker 4 (35:12):
I just keep thinking that the three of us will
be in a small room downtown answering questions.

Speaker 5 (35:20):
And we'll say it.

Speaker 6 (35:22):
Then you know they're going to try to turn us
against each other. So can we please agree here and
now whatever we do, we stick to the same goddamn story.

Speaker 5 (35:37):
Please write because.

Speaker 6 (35:39):
I know I know how these people offer. So what
is the story that we It was a podcast. We
do not know this guy. He wanted very badly to
connect with Steve O'Donnell and separate advice.

Speaker 1 (35:53):
The people at iHeart vetted him. Told us that they
vetted him fly.

Speaker 5 (35:57):
Oh that's what they want you to believe.

Speaker 1 (35:59):
No, I'm making this up.

Speaker 6 (36:07):
Yes, yes, that's my understanding was that he had been
We were.

Speaker 1 (36:13):
That there was indemnified. Thank you. Yeah, okay, I think
we're ready to talk.

Speaker 5 (36:19):
To Okay, so who are we talking to?

Speaker 1 (36:22):
We're talking to the guy Barack. Is his name b
b U R A K. Well, we'll ask him how
to pronounce it. Okay, we're going to give it a shot.
We're going to throw our trust in Barack. Is he
on Live with us, he's about to be joining.

Speaker 6 (36:39):
I should have I should have paid more attention to them,
to the premise, to the email.

Speaker 5 (36:44):
I was hoping to beat traffic.

Speaker 1 (36:46):
How about that. Okay, let's go for this. Not feeling well,
none of us sorry, none of us sorry. Okay, hey Barack,
and you see me. It's Robert Barack. I thank you
for your inquiry. I'm just going to get a few
things out of the way. You want help writing a
fan letter to Steve O'Donnell, and you've been thoroughly vetted

(37:06):
by iHeart. Okay, got one more person to say it.
And now I've brought in a couple of people who
have worked with Steve O'Donnell, you know, because yes, my
comic sensibility blah blah blah, but I don't really know
Steve O'Donnell very well. So I've brought in a couple
of people to help me help you. So can we

(37:28):
cut to the first My first guest, who's going to
help you. Did you see him? That's Jim Downe by Barrock.
Jim Downey, who's known for yeah you know who he is,
principle and excuse me, but more importantly for this purpose,
he wrote with Steve O'Donnell. Well for a few years,

(37:50):
work closely with Steve O'Donnell on the show Late Night
with David Letterman. You seem excited to meet Jim. It's
a podcast, so feel free to say, okay, okay, I'm
glad you're okay. So you know Jim, Jim's gonna Jim's
here to help you. Now. I brought one other person

(38:10):
who worked on the this Late Night with David Letterman show.
Can we pan and show him? Uh? There that's a barck.
This is Dave from Indianapolis.

Speaker 7 (38:23):
Hi, Hello, says Block. Honestly, you're gonna have to meet
I am the random old guy.

Speaker 1 (38:35):
Dare you how dare you?

Speaker 5 (38:37):
Right out of the box? Well, write your own letter?
Yeah for real.

Speaker 1 (38:43):
It's just, uh, we're not going to insult Steve O'Donnell
if you if that's what you're looking for, is a
snappy insult comedy. It's not happy Oh no, no, get
the dog. Yeah, yeah, dog. The dog's in a Dwayne
Reid bag next to my bed. Uh, Barack?

Speaker 4 (39:00):
Uh?

Speaker 1 (39:02):
Okay? Are you over your your You seem shocked rock
as I let me remind you this is.

Speaker 3 (39:09):
A podcast week.

Speaker 1 (39:10):
I'm okay, good, good, okay.

Speaker 5 (39:14):
May I ask a question, Barock?

Speaker 4 (39:16):
What is the objective for the email or letter to
Steve O'Donnell?

Speaker 1 (39:22):
Did you hear that?

Speaker 3 (39:23):
Well? For me, I just wanted to ask him a
question about comedy. But maybe the grander scheme right, But.

Speaker 5 (39:31):
From my point of view, you couldn't have done a
better impression. Just tremendous. I'm ready to sign.

Speaker 1 (39:38):
All you need to do is zoom Steve, Apparently, what
has been your experience in comedy?

Speaker 3 (39:44):
No experience in comedy except for writing a couple of
jokes for myself.

Speaker 5 (39:48):
Well that's pretty much all it takes. You're on a
rocket ship to the moon, my friend, you are Artemis three?

Speaker 1 (39:55):
Is that your goal to be in comedy? I guess
we have.

Speaker 3 (39:59):
I don't think that I could say that my goal
is to be in comedy because because it kind of
seems surreal to me as a goal, because I don't
see a path that leads to it. But I guess
that will be a dreaming.

Speaker 4 (40:13):
Barack, can you tell the three of us here a
little bit about yourself? For example, what did you do
today Monday in Turkey?

Speaker 3 (40:22):
Today I was teaching my students who are who are
nobaters things about structuring arguments.

Speaker 1 (40:30):
So he is a debate expert.

Speaker 3 (40:33):
No, no, I studied. I majored in industrial engineering, but
I ended up debating in the national circuit, so that
just turned out to be my profession.

Speaker 5 (40:41):
Do you have a family, Barack, I have a brother.

Speaker 4 (40:46):
Okay, are you currently appearing on Broadway? I'm sorry, we're
going to turn over all the cards.

Speaker 1 (41:02):
It does feel like what's my life?

Speaker 5 (41:04):
Arlee?

Speaker 1 (41:05):
In your turn people who served in World War Two? Exactly, So, Barack,
I think it might help to give you a little
insight into Steve O'Donnell and maybe what he would appreciate
in a letter. And Jim, you've known him the longest.

Speaker 6 (41:24):
I would say Steve is a good person, but like
the rest of us, he likes a little bit of flattery.
What about in particular, Yeah, I would open with maybe
a compliment on his smile, you know, take a lot
of pride in his in his he does like if

(41:46):
if I were saying, you know, you could even make
it up. You can claim you saw him on some
talk show and you were struck by his his gleaming
teeth or his you know, his The whole presentation is
that he has gives off an aura of someone you know,

(42:07):
that that anyone would be honored to have as a friend.
I mean that at least I think that would disarm him.
And now that you mentioned the debate, you're like, must
be a top debater if if people come to you
for because there can't be that many people who teach debate,
are there.

Speaker 3 (42:27):
Yeah, I was the national champion a couple.

Speaker 6 (42:30):
Of years, national champion, right, I would get that into
the first sentence, as a national debate champion in my
country of Turkey. I think I'm a good judge of
these things. And your smile just lights up a room
something like that.

Speaker 1 (42:49):
I don't think I have any trouble debating the quality
of your smiles like that. But also that would be
an easy thing to take the pro on.

Speaker 6 (43:00):
Yeah, this is kind of a this is this is
swinging for the fences here. But if you you could
challenge him to a debate, oh and say, whoa you
pick the venue. I'll go any anywhere, anytime, any place.
I will you know, mon amno, you and me toe

(43:23):
to toe. You can pick the venue. If I get
to pick the topic.

Speaker 4 (43:27):
The topic, I would let me interr up here, yes
or no. Steve O'Donnell is the funniest man in America.

Speaker 6 (43:37):
There you go. See he's gonna resolve. Steve o'donald's the
toniest man in America. And you take the pro side,
and then what's he going to do. He's gonna he's
gonna win that debate. So I think you take the
pro side, leave him arguing against his own talent.

Speaker 1 (43:59):
Yeah, yeah, right. A lot of comedy writers like to
do that in public. They like to be very self effacing.

Speaker 6 (44:06):
I think also, this guy's national champion. I put my
money on.

Speaker 5 (44:13):
Air air.

Speaker 4 (44:13):
Addition, he's very addition, yea, yeah, flatter him because he
is uh you died, He's beyond the definition of the
word and like you his uh has a Well, I
wouldn't say he's yeah, I would say he's pasty.

Speaker 6 (44:30):
Oh can I can I something that Dave? You might remember?
This is good, something that you that you do not want.

Speaker 1 (44:38):
To go ahead?

Speaker 6 (44:40):
Steve his entire life and I know this from the
very first time I met him. Has do you have
rice Crispies in Turkey? Because it's it's deep, it's a
breakfast it's a breakfast cereal in the United States? And
there he does, he does do. Okay, there are three

(45:00):
characters Snap, Crackle Pop.

Speaker 1 (45:03):
Are they on the cover of your you're familiar with well, Steve, Well,
but they just have the cereal on the front. Okay, Wow,
you don't have a bastard. Yeah, Now I don't want
to visit.

Speaker 6 (45:16):
Well, there is I've just finished the thought in case,
in case you should encounter.

Speaker 1 (45:22):
The box, and he's gonna want to google it.

Speaker 5 (45:25):
Okay, you'll look it up.

Speaker 6 (45:26):
Okay, you look at from pole uh Kellogg's Rice Crispies,
you will see these three cartoon characters, Snap, Crackle and Pop.
And Steve O'Donnell his entire life from childhood, has been
tormented for people accusing him of looking like Crackle.

Speaker 5 (45:45):
Really, oh, I kind of remember that.

Speaker 6 (45:47):
Yeah, And I remember there was a woman who was
on the show and I was standing there with Andy
Brickman and Steve O'Donnell and and it was an African
American woman and she was standing there going. You know
who you favor, you know who you favor, And I
know that Steve knew that she was thinking of Crackle,

(46:08):
and she finally came out Rice crispy, and he laughed
because what else could he do? But he was hurt
because it's been a while, we knew enough not to
bring it up. So I guess what I'm saying is,
if at any point crossed your mind that it would,
it haden't, but now it probably hadn't. He's not It's

(46:31):
not a compliment whatever you tell him that he looks
like crack.

Speaker 1 (46:33):
Wait a minute, Wait a minute, but what if he
brings up the fact that he doesn't look like crackle?
Would that would that be.

Speaker 6 (46:42):
If he brings it up, if he says, I don't
think it looked like crackle, you would go who would
say that?

Speaker 1 (46:48):
You could be suspicions those are you?

Speaker 6 (46:51):
That's a joke, right, You don't look at anything like
Crackle or Snap or pomp for that matter.

Speaker 1 (46:57):
That's true. Maybe he would take it as a day,
you know, maybe.

Speaker 6 (47:00):
Just stay away from the whole. I would even stay
away from Kellogg's Breakfast or any rice product.

Speaker 5 (47:10):
I had a curiosity about cocoa puffs. Do you have those?

Speaker 3 (47:17):
Now, we do have those, but unlike you guys, we
don't put weird characters on like well.

Speaker 5 (47:23):
I think you're smart. Good job for me one.

Speaker 6 (47:26):
Yeah, well, how are you going to addict young children
to eating sugar and breakfast cereals.

Speaker 5 (47:33):
By a few words about the one children?

Speaker 3 (47:36):
Encouraging the addiction of children seems to be uniquely the American.

Speaker 6 (47:38):
DA No, thank you.

Speaker 1 (47:41):
I thought we had exported that, like you know, like wrestling,
and I want to.

Speaker 5 (47:45):
Hear something about Gomez. I want to hear something about
air to one.

Speaker 1 (47:49):
Go ahead, So.

Speaker 3 (47:52):
You guys you're to be arrested. I guess okay, yeah.

Speaker 4 (47:55):
That's the whole purpose of the afternoon. We would like
to see you zip and take it away.

Speaker 3 (48:01):
You've been playing the long I guess yeah.

Speaker 1 (48:05):
Dave, Dave flasher badge because this is a long time Yes, exactly, boys,
his entire career has.

Speaker 6 (48:18):
DA day will get one of those secret c i
A medals, Yes, a secret ceremony shows.

Speaker 1 (48:30):
Wow.

Speaker 6 (48:31):
But the rock that did make a good point. We
we have done a lot of damage in the world
with our oh sure, exporting our sugar America.

Speaker 3 (48:41):
Yeah, mainly serial I think if I were to incriminate
the United States, the first thing that came to mind
will be cereal.

Speaker 6 (48:48):
Sure everybody again, but again we've agreed that's not a
topic we want to get into.

Speaker 1 (48:55):
In the In an email, How did you come around
to UH wanting to speak with Steve Odo in particular?
Is there did you like his particular any bits that
he's well known for?

Speaker 3 (49:06):
Or I was hoping to find the email address of
any comedy writer and Steve was the only one who
made the mistake of making a public so creeps like
me could write it.

Speaker 1 (49:18):
Okay, that's not going to be in the email. That's
not going to be in the letter. Yeah, but surely
you have respect for him as a comedy writer. It's
not solely because he was successors the Great.

Speaker 3 (49:33):
Writer podcast of episode There you Go.

Speaker 1 (49:37):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, And yes, he's worked with Norm closely,
Jimmy Kimmel very closely, and obviously was head writer for
how many years with it for you on the NBC show?

Speaker 5 (49:49):
Not not long enough? I can say that.

Speaker 1 (49:52):
Are you familiar with any of his particular contributions to
UH to Late Night?

Speaker 5 (49:57):
Let's give him Kimmel's number.

Speaker 1 (49:59):
Yeah, individually, what was the first thing.

Speaker 3 (50:03):
You said, the individually wrapped cereal as an idea.

Speaker 6 (50:07):
Was there in the cereal individually?

Speaker 5 (50:11):
That was Steve?

Speaker 1 (50:13):
It was individually. It was a new product, right right?
But is that going to evoke Rice krispies? Are we
going to have that problem if he brings that up
in the letter, that's the least you're depends.

Speaker 6 (50:24):
On how it's done.

Speaker 1 (50:26):
It's time to care for me, you know.

Speaker 6 (50:29):
I think you can head off any implication that that
he looks like, I mean, don't get into like the tiger.
That's oh my god, that'll just get that mess.

Speaker 1 (50:43):
Jesus. Yeah, okay, So individually wrapped corn flakes, that's a
great one. What else did you? The top ten? Was
that it?

Speaker 3 (50:49):
I mean the top ten numbers from one to ten.

Speaker 6 (50:52):
He wrote some of the very funniest numbers ten lists, but.

Speaker 1 (50:57):
He's specifically talking about one through hand. Oddly enough, though,
this is not to denigrate Steve o'donald, but some version
of the top ten originated on the news show.

Speaker 6 (51:10):
Yeah I did. I did a top five thing which
was similar and that.

Speaker 5 (51:15):
Was from you. Is that what happened?

Speaker 6 (51:17):
Yea, I'm partly yeah, but bitterness but the point is
Steve is I, to my mind, wrote the funniest.

Speaker 1 (51:28):
Top ten jokes that I have ever heard.

Speaker 6 (51:31):
I mean, he I just knew it was his voice.

Speaker 1 (51:33):
When I have any examples of a favorite.

Speaker 6 (51:36):
Well again, I'm pretty I hope you got him right
about this. It was when it was like top top
ten excuses for the Bills losing after through bowling a
row in a row, and one of them was an
ill chosen halftime rallying cry of let's win this for
the late Roy Cone.

Speaker 5 (52:00):
I can remember that one time.

Speaker 4 (52:02):
I was very frustrated with the top tens that were
coming in, so I passed out the books that Steve
O'Donnell had contributed to and and the writers were so
angry with me that they quit.

Speaker 1 (52:13):
Are you serious?

Speaker 5 (52:13):
Well they eventually came back, but bad gesture on my part.

Speaker 1 (52:18):
They just felt like you were just trying to show
them what the best.

Speaker 5 (52:21):
What I was trying to do, Lord knows, always trying
to do my best.

Speaker 1 (52:24):
Wow, Because I dealt with this on Conan too, Like,
we thought we were pretty hip, and yet there are
always a couple of writers who think you're being hacked.

Speaker 5 (52:33):
Yeah, yeah, that's right. We had a writer a very
well known person who quit and left outside my door
a stack of material of his that had not been
selected and with the note you could have had this
material and then can you tell us later? I will
tell you later.

Speaker 1 (52:51):
Okay, did his name rhyme with? No, it's not well
George George. We had to send him.

Speaker 5 (52:59):
A jug of liquor to get him to come back
one time.

Speaker 1 (53:03):
I can't believe that, because George was that way when
I went to Saturday Night.

Speaker 5 (53:07):
Yes, he couldn't be hip enough for George.

Speaker 1 (53:09):
Yeah, and his his catchphrase, which I thought originated at SNL,
because all he would talk about was how cool your
show was? We all thought so. And he would just
say when he would see a bad sketch address.

Speaker 8 (53:20):
Show dying farewell, little show. You used to be so
good back in the seventies, back when the writers cared.

Speaker 6 (53:35):
George had extremely high standards.

Speaker 1 (53:39):
But he really.

Speaker 5 (53:42):
I remember he took it personally, but I'm glad to
hear it. He took that with him to other productions.

Speaker 1 (53:47):
Yeah, and then when I was at Conan, I had
writers like that at the beginning of Conan who were
just like, really, we're doing another actual item now. Yeah,
I know it is. It is.

Speaker 6 (53:59):
When I was there, I didn't think I was like
this incredible hack square. But some of the people are like, oh,
really we're doing that. They go, yeah, we're doing It's funny.
It's fun.

Speaker 4 (54:08):
And also it's an hour every damn day. So yeah,
listen Brock, thank you very much.

Speaker 5 (54:14):
I know you got to run. You're doing another podcast.
Great to see you. We'll we validate your parking, my friend,
good luck.

Speaker 1 (54:23):
I'm sorry, well we just I'm just enjoying being near this.
These people, they're my heroes. And wait, so we're we'll
be right back with you. I suh, Wait, we were
just talking about.

Speaker 6 (54:41):
Steve was was brilliant and an extremely supportive of everyone.

Speaker 5 (54:49):
And he was absolutely so patient with He was the mast.

Speaker 4 (54:52):
We would be late on a Friday night trying to
think of something to do Thursday night, trying to do
something for Friday, and I just wore the poor man
out and you could see he would do this and
the veins would appear in his forehead.

Speaker 5 (55:05):
But he was nothing.

Speaker 6 (55:06):
I mean, I've always probably yeah, but you know, there
was a time then when it happened like six weeks
in a row, every Friday, every Thursday, night, a writer
that we really really enjoyed and got a kick out
of would come in and quit and that was very difficult. Wow,
because I like some of this felt like it was

(55:27):
almost like if you feel like you've you've thought of
every idea you're going to think of, you make way
for someone that it was a responsibility to.

Speaker 4 (55:36):
Perhaps perhaps that was was it at the time, it
seemed to be something different, But as the guy whose
name was in the title of the show, I just
felt like I had been gutted, you know, because these
were people who were super funny, really really strong.

Speaker 1 (55:48):
Yeah, that's uh. I'm surprised because the nature of talk
show because I got to do The Conan Show, and
compared to SNL, it felt so much less stressful to
be a writer on a talk show because every day,
because of the volume BUSINESSSNL, everything is up to that week.
And also every show is more unique because it's based

(56:11):
around a host. So you feel like if you've written
this joke or this these sketches and they don't get
on that they're just gone. But on a talk show
it feels like you might get a shot.

Speaker 4 (56:21):
My own manager, Jack Rowlins, I can remember him sitting
in a chair, and he said, Dave, these are like
the material that you're doing here is like a paper cup.

Speaker 5 (56:28):
You just tear it up and throw it away.

Speaker 4 (56:30):
And as insulting as that might seem, it was factual
and the only way to live in that nonsense every night. Right.

Speaker 1 (56:38):
It's ironic though, because yes, all that stuff.

Speaker 6 (56:41):
Up every year, every month of late night. There was
something great that.

Speaker 1 (56:48):
Was as I was watching it eye as worthy.

Speaker 6 (56:53):
Of remembering as any you know.

Speaker 1 (56:55):
Here's the irony is that now the Internet exists and
people digest a lot more stuff in short form than
they do. Brock.

Speaker 4 (57:06):
What was the funniest bit I ever did that you
like so much with your friends back there in Turkey?

Speaker 3 (57:12):
Yeah, well none of my friends back here in Turkey
know you.

Speaker 4 (57:15):
But speaking of friends, way to make friends?

Speaker 1 (57:20):
Yes, that's not going to be in the letter either, Brock. Brock,
how did you come about? So it's Norm's podcast, that's
how you first starts.

Speaker 5 (57:29):
Oh that's a pretty good place to start.

Speaker 1 (57:31):
Right, But did you also? Did you did you get
to watch like Dave has a YouTube page now where boy, No,
I'm very grateful for it. I get to watch stuff
I hadn't seen in.

Speaker 4 (57:43):
Years you and I have to do something together, maybe
the three of us.

Speaker 5 (57:47):
I mean, certainly not this, but something.

Speaker 1 (57:52):
That's all. I just wanted to I wanted to talk
about a project, and we're going to do that in
the next hour. Okay, Brock, how about this? What I
love to answer to your question? Okay, go ahead, answer
the question.

Speaker 3 (58:10):
I mainly scour YouTube for obscure clips, and if I
can find anything that I like, I go to the
internet archive for your all of you guys' episodes.

Speaker 5 (58:21):
Of like okay good back in the eighties.

Speaker 1 (58:24):
Okay, So I was going to say what I love
to hear. The rare times anyone comes up to me
is when they say something like, you know, you helped
me through a difficult time. Kind of. Ye, that's sort
of because we it's such a silly profession and it's
great to make people laugh. But those are the times

(58:47):
when you feel like, oh, you're reminded that you're serving a.

Speaker 5 (58:51):
Person of humanity there. Yes, so I agree with that.

Speaker 1 (58:54):
Yeah, so what if you did that but in a
funny way, like doesn't sound funny, but if you said
something like you know, and you would make up scenarios
so he'd know it was a joke, but like create
a tragedy. Like you know, my my grandmother was in
the hospital and she was clearly uh you know, touch

(59:17):
and go.

Speaker 5 (59:17):
How about this the air to one came dragged her
out of her house. Is that a hook there?

Speaker 1 (59:23):
That is a hook? I think we should build to
that though. Okay, so let's start with a conventional one.
She's in the hospital, it was touch and go. She
was miserable going through uh you know, some kind of
fun hit.

Speaker 6 (59:37):
And run building in front.

Speaker 1 (59:41):
Okay, that's going to be the next one. And the
only thing that would make her happy was when you
play the tape of individually wrapped corn flakes. Understand, and
then you proceed some and then the next one is like, Okay,
my sister in law was in a hit and run
an accident.

Speaker 6 (01:00:02):
For example, my grandmother is only alive today because because
of individually wrapped cornfil.

Speaker 1 (01:00:13):
But let's you know, maybe that's the first one is
in she's only alive today hit and run accidents. She's
only alive today because of uh, the expression husky idlers.
You know I heard say that he came up with
the expression husky. I yes, we loved it.

Speaker 4 (01:00:36):
Weren't certain of the context, but loved the combination of
words describing someone as a husky idler.

Speaker 5 (01:00:43):
Yes, since the dawn of civilization, eyeglass wearers have been
subject to ridicule, harassment, and occasional jostling by husky idlers.

Speaker 7 (01:00:51):
Yes, an ideal, that was something good luck with ed Barrock,
this is great.

Speaker 1 (01:00:55):
And then and then the third one she was dragged
you know, or my father was ragged by Air to Wan,
or maybe we build to the Air to Wan. One
but depending on how many you know, you probably only
need three.

Speaker 5 (01:01:08):
I think three is the number, and three is.

Speaker 1 (01:01:10):
The number in comedy hard season case and three so
and then the only thing, So he was being dragged,
you create the scenario for us.

Speaker 4 (01:01:21):
Somehow she was seen in public railing against the government,
and Air to Wan got wind of this and invited
her to some sort of festivity the state Hall. Do
they have a state hall in Turkey? And just as
they were about yeah, just as they were about to

(01:01:44):
award her something lovely, the zip tied her and took
her away and we didn't see her for the rest
of the weekend.

Speaker 1 (01:01:53):
And she said that the only thing that sustained her.

Speaker 4 (01:01:56):
Yes, and the only thing that kept her alive, that
gave her the will to live?

Speaker 1 (01:02:00):
Was was watching Oh You Got One?

Speaker 6 (01:02:03):
I was thinking of the fragile porcelain mice? Is that
Steve Steve o'nile thing, isn't it?

Speaker 5 (01:02:11):
Fragile porcelain mice?

Speaker 1 (01:02:13):
I don't know. She's in a pretty dire position here.

Speaker 5 (01:02:15):
Is that enough?

Speaker 1 (01:02:16):
I was going to say, seeing Muchibur and SyRI Jules
sing with Tom Jones, No, what what about the Bill
Crow suit suitable? Is that a Steve o'donald bit though
it has to be a Steve for.

Speaker 5 (01:02:28):
The purpose of this podcast, Yes it is. It's a
solid Steve o'donald bit. She loved the bell Crow suit
and is alive today.

Speaker 1 (01:02:39):
Because well, she was alive for a while.

Speaker 5 (01:02:43):
For a longer time than anyone expected.

Speaker 1 (01:02:45):
What do you think of that approach? Steve would probably
like like it because presumably it's funny and secondly, and secondly,
it acknowledges Steve's contributions to the show.

Speaker 3 (01:03:00):
That approach would be great. And I saw him talk
about how he loud like bits about animals and phopomorphized,
So maybe we could find something along that line that
seems more like my shot.

Speaker 6 (01:03:13):
Down E've not even talking about triumph.

Speaker 5 (01:03:16):
Know exactly what he was.

Speaker 6 (01:03:17):
You know what, I should write a letter to Robert
now I have his email address.

Speaker 1 (01:03:22):
Now this is about Steve. We have to adhere to
the rules of the podcast, you know, otherwise he'd be
writing a letter to Dave or do you you're not
a h No, they're They're completely unreachable. They're completely unreachable.
But there are a few other ones you could mention.
You could mention noodles, the wet dog drying off in
slow motion.

Speaker 5 (01:03:41):
Oh, that something that's fantastic.

Speaker 1 (01:03:44):
Yeah, because I watched Steve's three part episodes of his
favorite bits. Oh that's what I think that would connect him.
Dog jacks, which was something you guys. You guys have
a love of fried baloney and you.

Speaker 5 (01:03:57):
Uh you made a yeah, I remember that too.

Speaker 1 (01:04:01):
Yes, waffles that were made out of yeah boloney.

Speaker 5 (01:04:04):
Yeah, my mommy has made fried baloney sandwiches. They were fantastic.

Speaker 1 (01:04:08):
She didn't make waffles.

Speaker 5 (01:04:09):
Do you have boloney in Turkey?

Speaker 1 (01:04:13):
Not with cartoon Caro's just regular okay? Good? Also, did I.

Speaker 3 (01:04:18):
Pitched something for the sign?

Speaker 5 (01:04:21):
We really don't have time.

Speaker 1 (01:04:22):
I'm so sorry, So no, go ahead of course you
of course, go ahead, Barack, please pitch away.

Speaker 3 (01:04:30):
A lot of the of animals, like it's kind of
a hack joking turkey, but maybe outside of that will work.
So you know, like the phrase love from X the country,
like love from Turkey the country. I also have a
pet turkey, but he hates your work, like maybe something like.

Speaker 5 (01:04:46):
That as a pet turkey that hates Steve O'Donnell's work.

Speaker 1 (01:04:52):
I think he would like that. Yeah, I think he
would like that very much. Yes, And then I think
you should also throw in his uh a lit just
to throw away comment about his smile and and and
something I think you might toward the end, maybe in
the salutation, the closing salutation, you know, instead of like sincerely,

(01:05:14):
maybe just you don't look like crackle, right, Yeah, yeah,
just throw it in at the vera.

Speaker 4 (01:05:20):
And by the way, we're both pasty.

Speaker 1 (01:05:24):
Yeah, nothing wrong with being pasty, Comma, Barack. I think
we're all set.

Speaker 5 (01:05:33):
I think we are too. Well, guys, thank you, No,
it's been fun.

Speaker 1 (01:05:38):
Thank you, Barack. And we'll follow up and see how
Steve received your your email.

Speaker 6 (01:05:43):
I will tell you he's gonna answer. Yeah, And the
only shocking thing would be how quickly.

Speaker 1 (01:05:51):
It's the kind of guy he is.

Speaker 5 (01:05:53):
Have you been to the United States?

Speaker 3 (01:05:58):
Jokes for you guys?

Speaker 1 (01:05:59):
Oh yeah, go ahead. Wants just ignore me. He's excited
about sharing a joke.

Speaker 5 (01:06:04):
Okay, I'm sorry. Go ahead, Yeah, let's hear it.

Speaker 1 (01:06:06):
Go ahead, please, go ahead.

Speaker 3 (01:06:10):
No, no, I'm going there's a kind of a lag.

Speaker 1 (01:06:13):
So we came on, executive, Sorry, sorry, go ahead.

Speaker 3 (01:06:24):
So, regarding the upcoming ninety ninth Ghazzi horse Race, a
senior executive stated that their mission was to remind fans
of the integral place of horses and culture. When pressed
for further comment, the executive made and galloped away.

Speaker 1 (01:06:42):
I like that.

Speaker 5 (01:06:42):
I don't know why, but I like that.

Speaker 3 (01:06:44):
I have another one.

Speaker 5 (01:06:45):
Okay, okay.

Speaker 3 (01:06:48):
This past Monday was the birth anniversary of painter Vincent
van Goo, who was a man widely described as born
before his time and died as an unknown artist. If
only he'd been born now, he could be an unknown baby.

Speaker 5 (01:07:04):
I like that also.

Speaker 1 (01:07:05):
I like that.

Speaker 5 (01:07:06):
Yeah, do you have another one? Barack?

Speaker 1 (01:07:08):
Yeah, go ahead.

Speaker 5 (01:07:10):
Yeah. You couldn't have done this a half an hour ago.
You couldn't have interrupted.

Speaker 3 (01:07:21):
I have one more. The Municipality of Istanbul and New
initiative to develop green spaces across the city over the
next five years. Among the plans are even more violent,
big green buildings.

Speaker 5 (01:07:33):
I like that.

Speaker 6 (01:07:34):
That's that's my favorite of the three.

Speaker 5 (01:07:36):
I like the second one also or the third one.
Were they got better?

Speaker 1 (01:07:40):
Is they want to like? These are very good. Those
are good for you. It's a very good We're sorry
that we were so useless.

Speaker 5 (01:07:47):
Yeah, we're just deliberately useless. We don't know what we're doing.

Speaker 6 (01:07:51):
Wait, he knows about the crackle thing. It could be important.

Speaker 1 (01:07:54):
No, he's going to do with that. He's going to
do great. Yeah, okay, So now we have to start
a Saturday Night Live in Turkey so that you can
write for the weekend.

Speaker 5 (01:08:02):
Up date that. How is that working out there? The
English one? Yeah, the British one have no idea. It's
nice to see. I know there's income. There's an Italian law.

Speaker 1 (01:08:11):
That's the big one.

Speaker 6 (01:08:12):
That's I thought was the bigger one.

Speaker 1 (01:08:13):
But is that one SNL sanctioned SNL?

Speaker 6 (01:08:18):
Okay, I'm the wrong guy that I'm out of touch
with all this stuff except with Steve and a.

Speaker 1 (01:08:24):
There there you go. Well, thank you so much, and okay,
we'll talk soon.

Speaker 5 (01:08:30):
Goodbye, thank you, thank you, luck bye bye.

Speaker 1 (01:08:34):
Wow.

Speaker 5 (01:08:35):
Okay, how about how about that there's quite a lot
there and then also not much there? Have you kind
of got that.

Speaker 1 (01:08:41):
The beauty of the show.

Speaker 5 (01:08:42):
Yeah, yeah, well I.

Speaker 4 (01:08:43):
Don't know about that, but I mean I think we're
asking more questions than we're answered.

Speaker 6 (01:08:49):
About the man when he said it's kind of hacky
joke in Turkey, Yeah that's right. Whoa I want to
hear about hacked jokes from Turkey?

Speaker 1 (01:08:58):
Yeah, I mean he had a pretty sophisticated yeah humor,
which makes sense if he's a fan of you guys.

Speaker 5 (01:09:03):
Now, did this support the premise? Do you think absolutely? Okay, Well,
our work here is finished, isn't it?

Speaker 1 (01:09:08):
Essentially it is, which means that I guess we can
say thank you.

Speaker 5 (01:09:12):
Yeah, thank you very much.

Speaker 1 (01:09:13):
You've got your ham, I got my ham. I've got
your station.

Speaker 5 (01:09:16):
You know, more than the ham, I have the memories. Yeah,
God bless you, my friend's bless you and God bless
you again.

Speaker 1 (01:09:23):
Yes, sir, thank you both. Thank you both for being
in my presence.

Speaker 5 (01:09:28):
Well let's do it. Okay, Well, let's work on a project,
like you said, Yeah, let's get something going, not this
year of course.

Speaker 1 (01:09:33):
But no, no, I'm saying, you know, get.

Speaker 5 (01:09:34):
Together around Labor Day.

Speaker 1 (01:09:38):
Thank you, thank you so much. Well, we will find
out in a little bit how Barack did, if Steve
O'Donnell received the letter, and how Steve reacted to it
after this. Hey it's Robert, you know what. That's plenty.
We're gonna put the rest in a bonus episode, not
a beatreon thing. It's free. But if you subscribe now,

(01:10:00):
we'll send it right to you. Letter downy, Steve O'Donnell,
Barack all headed your way. You're welcome. Humor Me with
Robert Smigel and Friends is a production of iHeartMedia and
Big Money Players, created by Michelle Sack Smigel, who executive
produces with her loving husband Robert. Produced by Frank Stinky Smiley,
executive producer for iHeart, Janet Cagele, video producer Daniel Goodman.

(01:10:22):
Additional material by David Cyrus, edited by Robert Ash. Humor
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