August 12, 2026 • 42 mins
Mawmas, while Snooki is in recovery mode from major surgery, our besties have left us another gift. A guide to the 2000s, with an all-inclusive flash back leaving us yearning for a time long ago (not that long though, we’re not that old). First, our besties are protesting the long, overheated summer. It’s time for the holidays! Speaking of sweaty summers, the two talk hygiene routines: it’s morning vs. evening showers. Then we’re on a wild ride to the past. Long before soul cycle, we had tanning salons for community, where befriending the receptionist was the key to your social life. It’s a mystery how we didn’t damage our skin and yet we’re claimed to be the youngest looking generation.
After baking all day in the artificial sun and spa, we hit the parking lots, chain smoking and cranking CDs, pregaming on cheap jet fuel by the names of Cisco and Four Loko to get our nights going and save a few dollars. We were broke back in the day, and this was before $30 cocktails. The best part? The after party…at your local Mickey D’s…Taco Bell, Burger King, and White Castle. Why choose? And no 2000s tour is complete without a book club read from our favorite adopted Chilean author…Snooki Polizzi’s Confessions of a Guidette. The ULTIMATE guide to Y2K fashion era including tacky jewelry, four inch heels (minimum), and what it means to be a Meatball.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:07):
It's happening with Snookie and Joey.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
Welcome to whip them out Wednesdays, ladies, take them titties out.
Pour yourself a cold one.
Speaker 3 (00:23):
Yes, welcome to what's happening with Snoopy and Joey. I
look like a drawn rat. I literally just got out
of the shower because it's so hot outside and I
feel like it's muggy today, and it's just it's not great.
So when I woke up, my air conditioning wasn't out
a sixty eight, like went back to seventy. So I
was sweating and I felt disgusting. So I had to
jump in the shower and like cool off because I
(00:44):
felt I felt nasty and like sticky. I hate it here.
I hate summer. I'm over it.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
I am so over. I'm putting the tree up this week.
I'm not because I I want.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
I'm pumpkins now.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
I'm ready. I'm ready for I have to get rid
of my storage. You know, I'm spending three hundred dollars
a month over there at that fucking storage. And if
just to keep my tree and all my serving platters,
it's like you might.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
As well just have it at the house and say
the tree up year round.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
I'll just get it. In the summertime, I'll put little
little lemons on it to make it look like a
lemon tree, and the fall, I'll put pumpkins on it. It's like,
I can't I can't afford to do this, this groovy
lifestyle anymore. So I have a tree now.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
I love people so much that keep their tree up
all year round, and they do like the different holidays,
like after Christmas they'll do Valentine's Day and then they'll
do Easter, and I just I think it's so cozy
and I love it. Gianni like kills me and he's like,
get the tree down. But you know what, maybe I'll
say no, and I'll keep the tree up all year
and decorate because that's literally I just love people that
(01:42):
do that. Well.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Nicole has in her house. She has seventeen fucking trees.
Like every kid has one in their bedroom. Each kid
gets on that. Nicole is like four in her bedroom.
Then she has the main one that she has the
one of the foyer, then she has the one on
the kitchen counter, on the kitchen counter in the kitchen.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
On these fucking trees. But you know what, I like Christmas.
It's my favorite time of year and I'm gonna go
crazy and I want my whole house to be a
winter wonderland.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
So did you always love Christmas? To call it when
you were a girl, you always loved it?
Speaker 3 (02:11):
Yes, I always loved it because No, I always loved
it because my family we would just like have family time,
and I don't usually I didn't see my family a lot,
so like Christmas time we would all get together, and
I just loved I just loved like being together and
like playing cards and doing all the things and eating
apple pie with everyone at the table. Like I just
(02:32):
I don't know. It was just very cozy to me.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Stop. That's nostalgic and sweet that you. Do you ever
think that two questions? Would you if you were able
to go back and have siblings, would you have chose siblings?
And two? Was it lonely? Was it lonely?
Speaker 3 (02:52):
That's actually a really good question. I always wanted siblings
just because all my friends had siblings and I wanted
a sibling. But I wasn't lonely because I always had
my best friends over, Like Frankie lived at my house,
I lived at Frankie's. I had Amy I had Steph,
so I was never alone, but I also I did
I did like my alone time, so when I was alone,
(03:12):
I just loved it. And then also I was very spoiled,
like I was the only kid. Yeah, so I feel
like if I had a sibling, I would get so
jealous because I am a very jealous person and I
hate that about myself. But if I had a brother
or sister and my mom was paying more attention to them,
I would kill them.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Do you think, like you know how there's like, like
I have siblings, I'm in the middle child. I wonder
if you would be the middle child even if like
wasn't like, even if you weren't in that category, that
that sequence. I feel like you would be the middle child.
Like I think oldest child is like the more motherly.
I think that in the youngest is like the braddiest
and weirdest. I think you would have be the same
as me, like a middle child syndrome where like you know,
(03:50):
you are just misunderstood and like you know, always like
forgotten about, not forgotten about, do you know what I mean?
I feel like you'd be middle child. I can't see
being motherly as a child.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
No, I think I would be the first child. I
was very motherly as a kid.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Oh you were to your cats.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
Well, I was just I was very shy and I
always wanted to be with family, and yeah I was.
I was not like I am now, Like I was
a totally different person. Oh yeah, I gus started to
change when I was like a teenager, because teenager like then,
like we started like liking boys and wanting to date
(04:30):
and like starting to like drink and try cigarettes.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
Like that's when I love cigarettes.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
I became who I am. But as a kid, no,
I was like I was a baby. I was so shy.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Yeah the weather is ohya you talking about showering. I
woke up this morning and I know, you know, I'm
I'm either here or miss either I'm a disgusting like
a stray cat, and I'm like not showering and I'm
staying in my bed and being discussing for years for
like months, or I'm like cleaning and washing my body
and like doing rituals and doing skincare. Well today, with
that day, I woke up for the first time ever. Normally,
(05:01):
when I wake up, I get up, I go to
the bathroom to pee, and then I go back into
my bedroom and I rot in the bed for like
two hours under the covers of Peaky playing on the
phone before I start my day. This I know. But
this time my alarm went off and started playing my
favorite song. And then I walked to the bathroom to pee,
and I said, you know.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
What, wait, what's the song.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
It's just it's it's it's Hollow Coves Coastlines. It's just
a very calming song to wake up to. It's like
it's like very like meditative and like calming and sweet,
and it's just it just eased me into my day
and it's very it's a very like soft song. So
I had that playing and I'm in the bathroom. I
was like, it was like fight or flight. It's like
(05:45):
should I go out and be and rot in the
bed and just play my phone because I knew I will.
I have a very busy day today. I already had
two meetings this morning, calm down, and I have another
one at four, so I have to and then I
have a birthday party tonight. I'll tell you about later. Anyway,
So I decided, I said, you know what what if
I just turned the shower on and get in the
(06:05):
shower and just like wipe off all the tiredness. I
got in the shower and I the second the water
hit me, I automatically felt rejuvenated. I started using all
my fancy as products. I used my I use my
favorite Cycler body wash. If you're not using Cycler body washing,
call I have to send it to you. It is
like the most sensual experience you ever had in your life.
(06:26):
I used my favorite body wash and I started just
coming alive. Then I got out of the shower and
I used all my skin, a full ten step skincare
routine with my trentonoen and all my oils and creams
I put. I wanted to try a new hair thing
because I got my haircut. I tried all my new
hair products, and then I went out to the bath,
out to the room, put on fresh underwear, and I
started my day. I gotta tell you, I mean, I
(06:48):
know this is a tales all the time, Like I'm
just discovering at forty seven, that's showering in the morning.
It's good for you. But I feel like I got
so much done already, Like I'm already two steps ahead.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:59):
See, so I'm not like a body wash girl. So
I love body wash for like the smell of it.
Like bath and bodyworks, I am a stand for them
till the day I die, Like I just it's it's
just my thing always. So I only do body wash
on my chest and like my neck because I feel
like it'll make me smell good. But like I'm a
Dove girl. I love just a regular Dove bar. I
(07:21):
need like a Dove bar because that makes me feel
like I'm actually like getting clean in the dirt off
if I use the body wash of my whole body.
I don't know, I just feel like I'm not I'm
not getting all the dirt off, do.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
You know what I mean? And it has three quarters
moisturizing cream in it. Do you know that? Remember those
commercials Dev with three quarters moisturizing cream.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
Oh, I love Dove. That's why I think my skin
is always so soft. So I love the regular Dove
and then I love the pink Dove. But yeah, I'm
a bar soap girl.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
Yeah, Oh how exciting. I'm gonna go buy a bar
of Dev soap this week. I love the smell.
Speaker 3 (07:51):
You're gonna be You're gonna be so smooth.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
It smells it smells the cleanest smell.
Speaker 3 (07:56):
Ever, clean fresh, Yes, like the squeezes, well yeah, no,
I don't mind them, but like I would, that's not
not that's not my normal routine. But I don't mind them.
I actually I feel clean when I use them. But yeah,
so I'm usually a nighttime shower person because I can't
go to bed, I can't get into my bed like dirty,
(08:19):
Like I want to be fresh and clean, like I
don't want any stickiness, like I need to be nice
and clean in my bed. But like waking up, like
normally I don't like wake up and shower, but when
I do, like this morning, because I took a shower
last night and then I woke up this morning, I
just felt gross. Taking a shower in the morning is
the best thing. It makes It wakes you up, it
makes you like ready for the day, and I just
(08:41):
feel like that's a lot of work to do every
single day. Though, like showering before bed than showering in
the morning, Like Giohanni does that all the time. That's
his normal routine, and he thinks I'm so gross not
showering in the morning, But I'm like, I just showered
at night.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
So does Billy Oh my god, Billy is a creep shower,
like a freak shower. He shows like.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
You want to be fresh for the door, Like I
am fresh. I just lay in bed like I'm fine.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
Yeah, Like I don't sweat, I just move, I just
lay there. Yeah. But I can't get in the bed
without having a shower because I get self tannered everywhere,
all my makeup and oils and all the things I
have throughout the day.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
The one time I did it is probably you know,
like when we're drinking and we're like, oh, I don't care,
I'm just gonna go to bed, and then you wake
up and you feel you feel gross, you feel like
a dirt. Yeah, so I love showers.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
Fresh fresh. Well, now that's so fucking hot out there's
there's air warnings everywhere this summer. It's like people there's
those wildfires were happening, and there was there's this smog.
People are walking around wearing K and K and ninety
five masks all around the city from the from the heat,
humidity and all through that. We were discussing growing up though,
like in this in the nineties, like growing up in
(09:53):
the summertime, I would did you go self tanned obviously
went self tanning. You have your own standing line. Let's
talk how we yeah growing up? Wait, let's talk about.
Speaker 3 (10:05):
Do you want to know a crazy secret? Though?
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Yes, I'd be honored.
Speaker 3 (10:10):
When I was in high school because I you know,
I was brown, because I'm fan Spanish, I'm very brown,
and my school was like everyone, you know, there's a
lot of white kids and I only had like two
black friends and that was like the whole you know,
there was just no brown people. Okay, yeah, So I
was like every time we would go out to eat,
(10:32):
like outside, there was tables and this is so crazy
that I ever did this because it's so not me.
But we would be outside and I'd be wearing shorts
and it's the summertime. I would cover my legs and
a towel and I didn't want the sun to touch
me because I didn't want to get brown, Like what
is sin? Can you imagine?
Speaker 2 (10:50):
Oh my god?
Speaker 3 (10:51):
I didn't want to be too dark and like not
match my friends, Like what a fucking sin? Now, I'd
be like, bitch, you are beautiful, your skin is stunning.
Go get brown. So how crazy is that that? Like
I didn't want to get too dark?
Speaker 2 (11:03):
In high school internalized racism.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
Crazy, and now I'm just like, ugh, I lay out
anytime the sun's out. I will go lay out for
at least ten minutes. Like I love being tanned.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
Well, that's good. That's a lot of that's a lot
of self discovery. You know, it takes a lot to
admit that.
Speaker 3 (11:20):
It's just crazy. How I was like that?
Speaker 2 (11:22):
Like, but then then you became the poster child for
being for being tanned tanned?
Speaker 3 (11:29):
Like how crazy? And yeah, loving bronze and bronzer and tanning. Yeah,
thank god, I you know, I became who I am.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
Waiting a cole There's a new setting spray out that
has self tanning and that self say, it's a bronzer
setting make up setting spray. I'm dying to get it.
So it's like, you know how I always spray that
pink can on you, the one sized beauty, that pink cannon.
It holds your make on forever. Well, now they have
two bronze flavors, so you can like spray it on
your face after your makeup so doesn't make you, it
still makest tan and it gives you like a glow.
(12:03):
So I need to get that.
Speaker 3 (12:05):
Well, yeah, if you're listening, please send us it. I
would love to try that.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
There's like a cocoa glow and then like a golden
glow I think of. They are called one sized Beauty.
Patrick Star, if you're listening, sen I've met that's Jeffree Star.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Oh, Patrick Patrick Star.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
Patrick Star is the one that has the turban on.
I believe he's a Filipino if I'm not mistaken.
Speaker 3 (12:31):
Oh, I don't think I know who.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Yes you do, He's yes, you do. He's got the
big head wrap on, and he's like bold and beautiful
and big smile and like you know, he's like, oh
I have to look Yeah, Patrick Starry. I have all
the products one size powders I use on him, but
the broad spread I love that. But like I isn't
it funny? How like we're still ourselves, but we have
(12:57):
to you have to change with the times. Like when
we were growing up, let's talk about tanning beds, like
what let's talk about like what our week looked like
before going out to the weekend. Like me, so for instance,
like tanning beds, like I was addicted so much, I
have to say, And it was like a whole lifestyle.
It wasn't just like you're going to tanks. It was
like it was like who's working the tanks on? Who
(13:17):
are you going to run into there? It was our
It was like it was a social club. It was
like it was a status symbol. Like if you if
you knew the bitchy girl that worked behind the counter,
and she's like neew, you're back to her the same
Oh you're gonna be in bed five tonight. Okay, yeah,
all right, do you want to stick our? You want
you want tangle? And it's like it's it was a
whole ritual. And we would all get tanning packages and
we would go I would and then and then once
(13:38):
you were addicted, I would go on my lunch break.
I worked at the mall, and I knew I was
going out. And that's one may. We used to go
out every single night, every single night of the week.
We were going out to a different bar. Literally our schedule,
so we knew, like it was a Tuesday, we were
going to Scotti's or wherever. While we're going to so
it's like, okay, I gotta get Tanford today, so I
and could you buy a monthly package? And if you
(13:59):
didn't use it, you lose it. So you were allowed
to go every day, right, once a week. Once it
was every day, right.
Speaker 3 (14:06):
Well, you know you're not supposed you weren't supposed to
go every single day. Were supposed to be more times
a week.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
But if you could, because you bought a monthly package.
You get thirty tans that month, and if you don't
use them, you lose them. So we I went every
fucking day. So I would go, and this is what
I would do. I would go to my lunch break
to go instead of eating, because you know, we wasn't
gonna eat it to be tan, and I would go tank.
I'd come back after putting the tingle lotion on and
I looked fucking purple. I looked purple from that cell.
(14:34):
That's that tingle tanner. Oh bitch, yeah, And I would
I would look crazy.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Really a fan of the tingle, yeah, because it like
hurt and I just yeah, I feel like there was
like no really good benefit. I just feel like I didn't.
I didn't like the feeling it.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Made you so much tanner, Like it wasn't really tann
it was just irritating your skin. It was like lip
plumper for your body. It was like it and it burned.
It was hard.
Speaker 3 (14:56):
Well, going to the tanning salon that was like that
was like therapeutic for me, just like laying in there
listening to the music and you feel so like cozy
and warm and you know you're getting a nice tan,
you're gonna feel skinny. Like it was just so relaxing
to me. It's like going to the spaw and getting massage.
That's how it felt for me.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
It was competitive too. It's like if it's like the
thing my friends and like people are other people at
the bars, like if you weren't tanned, like and you
and you didn't get like a good a good, a
good session that week, like you like you were chopped
and ugly, Like.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Oh, if you went with your girlfriends and you all
came out and you were like, who's darker? It was me?
Speaker 2 (15:36):
I would would double dips, so then I would start.
Then I would start to go spray tanning first, and
then I would go into the bed and bake it in.
I would after I sprayed it on, I would go
in theater that doesn't take it in. And then sometimes
like my friend, like I already went tanning that day,
but my friend had hers, so I would go there
with her and we would stand in the standing thing together.
We'd get in together and just to get a little
(15:59):
extra kick before the ball.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Are Oh you did the standing bed I didn't. I
never liked those I did.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
I was like, eh, And then when I was really
in my in my darkest moments, I would do it.
I had two different places I would go. I would
go to the one place, tan there, and then because
they're not gonna let you do twice in one day,
I would go to a second place and tan there.
I'm surprised. I'm surprised our skin didn't fall off.
Speaker 3 (16:25):
Yeah, I didn't do it that bad because I knew
I didn't want my skin to fall off because you're
already an Yeah. And the one time I went like
three days in a row and everything hurt, so I
was like, maybe I shouldn't do it this much.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Yeah, I've burned my didn't you burn your ass at
the tannel jersey shoreing? Just sit in the refrigerator.
Speaker 3 (16:49):
Yeah, that's when. So we came back from Italy and
we were in Italy for like a month and a half,
and like the girls, they didn't have like nails, there,
so we couldn't get our nails on. Our nails were disgusting.
We like ripped our nails off. We felt so gross.
And then we couldn't go tanning, so there was like
no tanning beds and we were hardly laying out. So
when we got back to Jersey, we were so deprived
(17:10):
of everything that we just ran and did all the things.
So we went to the uh nail salon, got our
nails done, and then me and Paulie went tanning more
than everybody else because like we wanted to be like
the Tannis and we ended up. Polly burned his space,
I burned my ass. Yeah, it wasn't great because we
we didn't tanned for a month and a half. Yeah,
we didn't shrivel up and die.
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Is America the only place that has tanning beds?
Speaker 3 (17:35):
Well, yeah, America is the only place.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
That's I'm sure they have. No, they definitely have them.
And those all those all those people like those uh
those Chavs in the Gordy Shore like all those, they
definitely have it in England. In Ireland, they definitely have
tanning beds there. I don't think Paris has them. I'd
be shocked. If I saw them in.
Speaker 3 (17:56):
Paris, it would probably be so chic though.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
Yeah, yeah, it probably has probably offer you Champagne. I
would love that. What is that?
Speaker 3 (18:07):
I love Rocky? I like to hit Rocky like is Belly?
He likes it.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Stop. Does he come in the car with you?
Speaker 3 (18:18):
He loves the car.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Car. Never, I'll go for it.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
We have to bring in the car, Piki.
Speaker 2 (18:28):
You don't have a car, no, So Peaky goes in
cabs and the uber sometimes.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
Yeah. But does he like lean out in the window.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
Yeah, he likes to look at the windows when I drive, though.
He likes to sit on my lap though, look at
the window when I'm driving. I like when I had
I used to take zip cars everywhere.
Speaker 3 (18:44):
What are we gonna do when when we don't have
them anymore?
Speaker 2 (18:47):
Stop, I'm going I've told you. I'm putting myself down
the same day as him, Peaky, But like getting ready
before before the bar. In the nineties, it's like it
was a whole ritual, Like we first of all drunk driving.
Let's bring that up, like we were drunk driving every day, Oh.
Speaker 3 (19:02):
My god, horrible friends. Everybody would do it in.
Speaker 2 (19:06):
School every day like you would. There was no ubers,
we drove to the bar, I mean not drunk driving,
and we would we would we would pregame at the
house and like you know, because because it was like
we had to get drunk before you went into the bar,
because first of all, we didn't have money to drink,
and the drinks weren't even expensive back then probably now
compared to now. But like we would have to drink.
So what I would do is I would after channing
(19:27):
all day and buying outfits of the Abercrombie and frying
my skin, I would we would drive either this is
my favorite thing we'd do. We would drive to the bar,
but have to stop at the liquor store. At first.
We'd get this thing called Cisco which was like this
like this like like booze wine. Like it was like
it was like moonshine. It was disgusting. Look it up. Yeah,
(19:48):
c I s CEO. We would have that in our
car and then we'd sit in the parking lot of
the hugging of the bar, chugging the alcohol in the
in our cars, smoking cigarettes and blasting CDs in the
car and the parking lot of the gay bar or
the bar we were at, sitting in the car, we
get fucked up and we had to drink that enough.
So then when he got inside alls we'd have to
buy is like two drinks because we were belligerately drunk
(20:11):
sitting in our car chain smoking cigarettes in the parking
lot of the place.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
Yeah, so we so I feel like none of us
like wanted to drive, and also we had no money
to get gas to like drive wanted to We wanted
to spend our money on the drinks and I'm talking
like twenty bucks a week, you know, like nothing. So
we would have Steph's brother drive, but he was so
like he wasn't like into like drinking or anything. Like
(20:40):
he like if we were drinking, he would yell at
us and tell us to throw it out, So we
would like put it in water bottles and as he's driving,
we would like to chug it pretending it's water and
like not make a face, and then after we were done,
we would throw it out the window so he knows
we weren't doing it. So we had like all all
the big brothers and sisters drive us everywhere because we
had no money for gas.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
Yeah, grass was a thing that was obviously still is
a thing, but yeah, we everything, We everything that week
in our whole lives just depended on the one thing.
It was going out, having money to drink and being
tanned and having a cute outfit. It's like that's all
we cared about. So we'd get drunk in the car,
then we'd go inside and get by like maybe like
three or four drinks. That's it because that's all we
(21:23):
could afford unless boys bought us drinks, and then we're forward.
But at the end of the night, like cause we
never we never left a bar until the lights came on,
like you you shut every place down every night of
the week.
Speaker 3 (21:33):
Yes, many times they would kick me out to be like, man,
we're closing, and like I had a missing shoe and
I was just walking out with one shoe and like
leaving my credit card there or no, my my debit
card and I had to go back or my license.
I'd go back in the morning, like do you have
my shoe and my license? Like that was like a
daily thing for me.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
Oh my god. Yeah, we shut it down. And then
but about about like if you you always said that
was like guess who was going to drive home? And
it was always like a thing like you had to
act the drunkest so they you know, they knew you
wouldn't have to drive home because if no one wants
to risk getting dui, it was very risky. So whoever
the bravest one was would drive the car to drive
the car home, like knowing what the risk was. And
it was like we it was not even a thing,
(22:15):
like there was no question about it.
Speaker 3 (22:16):
Never did taxis. I feel like taxis were very busy.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
No, we'd have taxis and we would go we wo'd.
Speaker 3 (22:22):
Drive there were taxis out outside of the outside.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Of the bars like wine, you know, we would drive
far to the bars, like the bars we would go
to we're like forty five minutes away, Like we would
drive like forty five minutes we drive to Philly, Like
we drive to Philly on a Tuesday night.
Speaker 3 (22:36):
Oh yeah, like ten minutes away.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
No, those regular bars like Scotti, so things like that.
We had bars like in bet like right there in
our towns. But like sometimes you go far away. But
so you would have to stop drinking like you would
if you Our thing was like are we did you
drink like an hour? Stop drinking an hour before you
had to drive because then and then that was that
was considered you were the most responsible, and like it
was considered Okay, I'm being responsible and by stopping drinking
(23:01):
it for the.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
Hour, Yeah, chugging, chugging water, chugging like ten glasses of water,
and then and then having lollipops.
Speaker 2 (23:12):
Lollipops, Yeah, I have lollipops. We would drive. I would
drive right then you would drive. The best part of
leaving was, you know, to go to Taco Bell and McDonald's.
It's like we'd go to the drive the drive.
Speaker 3 (23:23):
Through week McDonald's all day, yes.
Speaker 2 (23:25):
Oh my god, and get like whatever you can get.
Like we'd scrounge up change coins from from the bottom
of our seats and our horse scranging up coins to
get Taco Bell and we would just fucking binge eat
the Taco Bell. In the car there was wrappers every
We were disgusting, disgusting. And then the next day you
wake up, you do it all again, go to work,
(23:47):
ten on your lunch break, get.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
Your We had to be up early, like we had
to be at work at like eight thirty nine o'clock.
And I was still like feeling drunk, and I still
went to work and did the thing. And then came
back home and like, did it again? I can't do
that now.
Speaker 2 (24:05):
No, it's it was every everyone exaggerated that the gen
Zers have no idea. We're not exaggerating. It was seven
days a week going out to a bar every drinking
like an animal, every single day, Monday through Sunday, like
every single day there was a different thing. Monday was
this bar, Tuesday's this bar, and it was it was.
(24:25):
It was like full on drinking. I don't know how
we didn't die, And like I can't even imagine drinking.
I drank that wine a couple of nights, a couple
of weeks ago. I'm still hungover from it. It's like
I can't imagine drinking, Like how did we not die?
Speaker 3 (24:37):
But it's so weird though, because we like trained our
bodies to do that, Like we are so tough and resilient, Mina.
I know when you're getting older, like your body changes
or whatever, but we should still be able to hang
a little bit, Like I don't know why. It's just
getting harder and harder to really have a good time
and be okay the next day.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
And it's rude, Nicole. If we drank the way we did,
then all those calories, we would be seven hundred pounds
shut ins.
Speaker 3 (25:03):
They had to I would be a thousand pounds. Only
do so every time before like a bar or anything,
because like we hardly had any alcohol, we hardly had
any money, but obviously we wanted to like get buzzed
before we went. We would do power hour with beer. Yeah,
and that you guys, I don't know if you've ever
(25:23):
tried that, but that you could have one beer and
you put it in a shot and you take the
shot of the beer every minute, every minute for an hour,
you get rocked off your ass and it's one beer.
So if you guys are trying to save money, try
it out. You literally get you get drunk or.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Or I remember you used to if you drank beer
through a straw, like hit you harder, or like he
drank drinks through a straw, it's supposed to hit you harder.
Speaker 3 (25:51):
I still think that's the thing. Is that still not real?
Is that?
Speaker 2 (25:55):
I don't know? I don't know. I wait and remember
how bars would have breathalyzer machines and we would try
to who can get the most fucked up and blow
and get the highest number. Yes, that was the thing.
They was to get one, but we Hoppy gave me one.
They started selling them at like the Dollar store, was like,
you know, one for your car. He put me in
the glove compartment just so I had it.
Speaker 3 (26:14):
Now they have I just saw on TikTok they have
the key chain breathalysers. And when I'm like starting to
feel buzz, I want to see.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
What I blow. Yeah, to see because you don't even
know what it is like now I don't even know.
Speaker 3 (26:29):
Because now I could get drunk off of one wine
or but if I'm like if I'm traveling and I'm
like drinking, it's going to take more than that.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
But yeah, yeah, and then they have cigarette machines in
the place. Now they've even I think they have eight machines.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
Now, oh yeah, I saw that they do have vight machines.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
So yeah, I don't know how we made it through.
It's like we were driving drunk, putting our livers through things.
It's giving us our skin cancer.
Speaker 3 (26:58):
Hardly sleeping a little. Just now we are we were
killing it.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
We show we're killing it. Yeah. I shower spraytam and
they spray tam. Yeah, okay, I talked to you about
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And reading, No, you know I'm reading. I'm reading. I
read an exert from a book. It was a lifer
an ex ex expert, an excerpt, an expert, an excerpt.
(28:30):
I was reading from an accomplished Chilean not an author,
and I believe it's I believe it's was Confessions of
a Guidette. It was that even if you're wearing your
hair curly book, even if you're wris to wearing your
hair curly, you always have to flat eyron your hair beforehand.
You're going out without flat Should I get the book?
Should I get the book? Do you have a book?
(28:52):
I have it read here.
Speaker 3 (28:55):
So this is one of my favorite books, you guys.
It was my easiest book to do because it's like
how to would be a guida. So it was like
all the things that I do, like style wise, makeup wise,
basically giving you advice on how to be me, which
is crazy. I can't believe that's a thing. But it
was my easiest book and I loved it.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
Okay, there she is. Okay. This this week's book on
the Q Document Book Club is from a Chilean author,
Nicole Polizzi. Okay, and it says, and I'm gonna read
from the back and then we're gonna find out some
stuff that we need to know. It says my big
This is a quote from the from the author, My
(29:35):
biggest nightmare is waking up pale or without eyelashes. Is
that still true? Spooky?
Speaker 3 (29:40):
Same?
Speaker 2 (29:42):
Okay. Next is and I quote a guidat has to
know how to have fun anywhere, Like if you're stuck
in a cardboard box, you have to rock it first
of all, it rocket? Is that still true? Can you
still have fun in a cardboard box? Spooky? Yes? I can.
Speaker 3 (29:57):
I am still fun.
Speaker 2 (30:00):
And the third third quote is I love my slippers.
It's like wearing beds on your feet.
Speaker 3 (30:05):
Still wearing slippers.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Oh my god, this is so funny. We're coming full.
Speaker 3 (30:09):
Fource it's still the same.
Speaker 2 (30:12):
Okay. Next quote, If you can smell hairjel from a
mile away, it signals Guido mating season. Do you still
sell Gianni's hair gel from downstairs when he's in his bathroom.
Speaker 3 (30:22):
I feel like it's more the cologne, But yes, I
smell the hairspry. He does hairspray, so yes, I could
still smell it.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
I love that Billy doesn't wear cologne. I love hairspry
and he has and he has such a he's do
you know that he has. He has a nose of
a hound dog like he can smell if I put
like a face cream on or something and he's like,
he's like I'm getting a migraine. Like he's so annoying
with candles like he does. I can't light anything. I
can't have anything smelling around him. So he doesn't wear
(30:48):
a clone, but I wish he was.
Speaker 3 (30:50):
It's the worst.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
I wish he had a signature scent because I can
like wear his clothes, take his clothes and like wear
them as pillowcases. And I wish he had a scent
so I can like sniff him all the time. Okay.
Next quote, is I like to wear so many accessories
that people are genuinely confused.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
Yeah, I still like that.
Speaker 2 (31:10):
I still love But now your accessories are all like
beautiful diamonds that you got from your jeweler. They're not
like tacky like clips and stuff.
Speaker 3 (31:18):
Well I still wear tacky earrings and stuff like hoops
and like cheap poops and stuff. I still do that,
but yeah, my rings I like to I like diamonds. No.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
Now, this is a large quote. It says and I
quote gweenettes are born with attitude. It doesn't matter if
you're tall, skinny, round, or a smurf. What's your or
what's your background or what your background is. We put
on our bronze and we frickin' rock our princess status. Like,
get out of the way. I don't care. We don't
care what you think unless you're a mirror.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
See I I was always an all inclusive girl. So
like everyone that would like meet me, they'd be like, oh,
I want to be a meatball, but I'm too tall.
I'm like, being a meatball doesn't mean you're short and fat.
It means you could be whatever you want. Being a
meeple is like your energy and how you bring it,
so it's not about what you look like, but it's
about your energy and how fun you are and how
(32:11):
amazing you are. I always said that to people and
they were like, oh.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
Oh my god, I didn't know I'm reading the thank
you I've I've never thumbed for this book. I don't
think I've ever even opened it. You think, thank you
to you, thanked all your MTV people. Okay, Okay, these
are the chapters that we're going to read from on
this week's book club, from this Chilean author Spooky Nicole
Snoozy Paloozy.
Speaker 3 (32:38):
And adapted Chilean author.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
Yes, okay, so there's nine chapters you can choose from here.
We are Okay. Chapter one, How to be Aguiet? Chapter two,
The Style Snooky Style Revolution, Chapter three, My Favorite Things
Chapter four, Reality Star Princess. Chapter five, My Jet set Life,
Calm Down, Calm Down? Where were you going Vegas? My
(33:02):
Life as a Party Girl? Sixth My Lover six My
Life is a Party seventh, Snooking for Love. We were
supposed to have a show, remember that.
Speaker 3 (33:10):
We're actually Yeah, and then I fell in love with
Johnny Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
Number eighth.
Speaker 3 (33:14):
I feel like everyone would watch that. Can you imagine?
I was kind of going off of Tila Tequila.
Speaker 2 (33:19):
I'm oh my god, I remember her. Yeah, but eight
gt L according to me and number nine outside the Spotlight.
Oh that's her true self. Which which chapter do you
want me to read from?
Speaker 3 (33:31):
Just just just surprise it?
Speaker 2 (33:33):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (33:34):
Stop, okay, yeah stop?
Speaker 2 (33:38):
Whoa? What is it now?
Speaker 3 (33:41):
My just hat life?
Speaker 2 (33:42):
Please?
Speaker 3 (33:42):
Now, I can't say.
Speaker 2 (33:49):
This must be fashion week? This says every greet at
outing is a party. What to rock? You say? If
you say rock one more fucking time in this book Rocket,
this is the Lilah of the fucking of the book.
Speaker 3 (34:01):
No, that had to be my ghost rider putting that ins.
I've never said wrong.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
I've only read three things in the Rocket. Okay, okay.
Club A short, tight dress that shows off legs and
a butt crack or do something hot so you stand out,
big ass earrings, lots of blank four inch heels minimum.
And then if you're going to a bar, black or
animal print leggings or skinny jeans with four inch plus
(34:26):
heels or boots and a hot top. If you're going
to a friend's house. If you're going to a friend's house,
comfy clothes, juicy sweats, leggings, shorts, or a long T shirt. Yes,
if you're going shopping Mountie Petties with the girls, you're
gonna wear boots or flip flops and a kick ass tea.
I'm literally gonna fucking rip this book apart. Kick ass tea.
(34:48):
Don't forget the hate. Don't forget the hate. Block as
b l O c ka Z the hate I'm going
to I'm giving it. I'm giving this. I'm giving this
to Sissy's as you can read it. The high and eyelashes,
because we.
Speaker 1 (35:02):
Should give this to the schools. This is this is history, okay.
And the eye learn about this, and the eye lashes
because they make comfy clothes look sexy. And your birthday
party lesson foremost, first and foremost something to celebrate your
bad self and a t are with bling.
Speaker 2 (35:20):
Keep your boobies up when you're lying down. I hate
when you're lying down and you're with your juice head
and your boobs are flying onto your back and you
suddenly have a flat chest. Cut your elbows together. Unless
you're Jenny her boobs divie gravity and I'm obsessed with
her breasts. I love you, whore.
Speaker 3 (35:36):
This was before my boob jobs. I hated that I
hate when your boobs are nice and perky and the
dress then you lay down and they're in your back.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
You met Tim McGraw, I met everybody. That was my
mother's favorite, my signature drink the pickle teeny, my own creation.
Two warnings, no lightweights allowed, and be and you better
bring pickles one part vodka, half part pickle juice from
a jar. Pickles. You were no, you were ahead of
the trend. People are drinking dirty Martini's everywhere now and
(36:09):
a pickle teenie is just like you were really drinking
vodka and pickle juice back then.
Speaker 3 (36:13):
Yes, it was my favorite thing. I would mix it
in the shorehouse. I would take shots of pickle juice
and vodka. And I'm getting no, I'm getting no recognition
for any of it.
Speaker 2 (36:25):
I can't believe this. There's your mini mouse.
Speaker 3 (36:28):
All right, save it for the next episode.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (36:31):
I like our book club.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
Yeah, so that was That was this week's book club.
We're gonna read more from our authors, and you're sitting
in front of Tanny bed of course. Okay, wait, speaking
of nostalgia, and like the bars me and my friends
we used to do sometimes when we were hungover, or
like we didn't know what we wanted to eat, like
it was. You had to be very specific. Otherwise if
you didn't hit the craven you needed after the hangover,
(36:55):
like you know, say, we would have to outsource. So
like if everyone wants to go to McDonald's, like, Okay,
I love McDonald's, I want the Big Mac, but I
don't want their chicken nuggets. I hate their chicken nuggets.
Don't hate their chicken I'm just using this as a reference.
I love McDonald's chicken nuggets. But we would go up
the road was called Route twenty two. That's where the
big highway with all the stores on it that were
where I grew up in New Jersey, and we would
(37:18):
do a tour of Root twenty two, me and Jamie.
So Jamie would be driving orribe driving, and we would
go to like Taco Bell and we get the girl's
stuff Brito, then we go get fries from McDonald's. Then
we go get White Castle Burger, and we get all
the things like we go like hoarding all the best
things from each place, and then we go home. Yes,
and or if we're ordering and we do a tour
(37:39):
of the world, we do our EPCOT Center order I want.
Michell would order Chinese from this place we get should
get Chinese. I would order pizza, and then Jamie would
order Mexican, and then when it all got there, we
would be we'd like put on I think we would
be like nude. We would just be like no clothes
on because we guve pigs, and we would just be
like literally and elastic with pants. The lights all turned
(38:00):
like the windows clothed, and we would just sit on
the fucking sectional and we would eat all around the
world and have a global, a global cuisine party. I
want to do that for my next my next dinner party.
Speaker 3 (38:11):
Yeah, so I we would do. I would do the
Burger King Chicken sandwich, but I didn't really love their
flat for their fries, so I would do the burger
King Chicken sandwich and then I would go to McDonald's
and get the fries and a drink, because no, nothing
beats the Burger King Chicken sandwich for me, like so
freaking good. And then now yes, and now I love
(38:34):
to do sometimes I sometimes I still do that, like
if I'm hungover, I will order I'll I'll door Dash
or Uber Eats, the the just just the chicken sandwich
from Burger King and then like two fries and a
drink for McDonald's. Because it's just I just that's just
what I like. There's things that I like at certain places.
But you know, now, if I'm like traveling and I'm tired,
(38:58):
like not even hungover, just like fucking tired, and I
don't care and I just want to be happy, I
will do like like a full blown pizza menu. So
I'll get like a pepperoni stuff cruss pizza, and then
I will get a pepperoni col zone, and then I
will do cheese sticks, and then I'll do breadsticks. Like
every and anything you could think of that has cheese
(39:21):
and pepperoni on it, I'm getting it. And I'm just
I'm taking a bite of everything like I need. I
need options when it comes to cheese and pepperoni. Like
I just don't want the pizza. I want more things.
Speaker 2 (39:31):
Well that's why they do so well, those pizzaias, because
they have a re option for it. I crave, you know,
it's crazy, I crave lettuce. I think it's because I have,
like I have this thing, a dehydration thing, like when
I'm when I'm going to bed, like hungover or drunk
and I'm dehydrated, Like I'm so thirsty. I dream about drinking,
about drinking water and drinking sodas, and like, going from
my dreams will be like like a whole adventure trying
(39:55):
to get to the soda machine or trying to get
to the water bottle.
Speaker 3 (39:57):
Or trying to I love chugging water when you're hungover,
Like you literally wake up in the middle of the
night and you feel like you're in a desert and
you're like, oh my god, I'm so thirsty, and then
you chug. It feels so nice.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
I know, so I but so the next day when
I'm hungover, I'm craving cold, crisp lettuce, like lettuce like
I cause I think it's a I think it's a
part of the water and refreshing. I still I don't
just want a salad, but I need to have something
cold and refreshing and crunchy with my thing, because it's
a it's a form of hydration, I think.
Speaker 3 (40:25):
So, Like that's why you never I've never craved just salad.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
When I was hungover, I crave it, like, but not
not not just to eat a salad. I crave it
because I what I do is, you know, my favorite
thing in the world is to get a pizza and
then I get a salad, a chopp salad, and I
use my pizza as and I like the vinegar. I
love the vinegar flavor with the pizza, so I crave.
I get a big chop salad and I take my
pizzas and I use it as a scoop shovel. I
(40:50):
put it all on the skuf like that. Eat the
pizza with the salad, so it's again you're cheesy and crunchy,
create cheesy and gooey and crispy, and then you get
the fresh refrunch and crunch the vinegar salad.
Speaker 3 (41:01):
I love it.
Speaker 2 (41:02):
That's my favorite thing. And that's does me right well.
Speaker 3 (41:05):
Now that we're like, you know, trying to eat healthier
and be better human beings. When you are craving like
the pizza, and you're not hungover, you're just like craving,
you know, like pizza or whatever. Now I and I
tried this. It's very good. You put mozadel cheese on
the sove and you kind of make a bread out
of it, you know, it gets like nice and hard
(41:27):
and then you put pepperoni on it, and then you
eat it just like that. So it's just the cheese
and the pepperoni and it's a nice little snack and
you're not eating the carbs and you don't feel like
a fat ass.
Speaker 2 (41:37):
After what do you do? You just put cheese on
an enlighteness? What is this new spooky snooky stack?
Speaker 3 (41:43):
You put the cheese on a pant all over TikTok. Yeah,
so no bread, you put cheese, Just put cheese so
it gets nice and hard so it feels like a crust.
And then you just put pepperonium whatever toppings you want
and that's literally your pizza without the.
Speaker 2 (41:55):
Carbs on the pan.
Speaker 3 (41:57):
Yes, look it up on TikTok. It's a thing oh
so good and you don't feel like fat, and you
don't feel like you're mad at yourself for you know,
eating it, because you know you're trying to eat healthy
and everything. But I crave cheese and I crave pepperoni
a lot because it's my favorite thing.
Speaker 2 (42:16):
Well, Spookie, this has been lovely.
Speaker 3 (42:17):
This has been so lovely.
Speaker 2 (42:19):
I have to go spray, I have to go to
the tanning bed, drinking a parking lot and yes and
yeah and just and drive and drive drunk.
Speaker 3 (42:28):
So I think you have to go blow out my
hair and put a poof in and put in cheap jewelry.
Speaker 2 (42:34):
Well, it's been Lovely Crusader's second Lovely tuning into the
hit podcast. It's happening so you can joy. Make sure
to fallows on all platforms like Common and subscribe and
we will see you next week on Whip Him At Wednesday.
Speaker 3 (42:46):
Lovely Bitches, it's happening with Nookie and Joey
It's happening with Snookie and Joey.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
Welcome to whip them out Wednesdays, ladies, take them titties out.
Pour yourself a cold one.
Speaker 3 (00:23):
Yes, welcome to what's happening with Snoopy and Joey. I
look like a drawn rat. I literally just got out
of the shower because it's so hot outside and I
feel like it's muggy today, and it's just it's not great.
So when I woke up, my air conditioning wasn't out
a sixty eight, like went back to seventy. So I
was sweating and I felt disgusting. So I had to
jump in the shower and like cool off because I
(00:44):
felt I felt nasty and like sticky. I hate it here.
I hate summer. I'm over it.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
I am so over. I'm putting the tree up this week.
I'm not because I I want.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
I'm pumpkins now.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
I'm ready. I'm ready for I have to get rid
of my storage. You know, I'm spending three hundred dollars
a month over there at that fucking storage. And if
just to keep my tree and all my serving platters,
it's like you might.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
As well just have it at the house and say
the tree up year round.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
I'll just get it. In the summertime, I'll put little
little lemons on it to make it look like a
lemon tree, and the fall, I'll put pumpkins on it. It's like,
I can't I can't afford to do this, this groovy
lifestyle anymore. So I have a tree now.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
I love people so much that keep their tree up
all year round, and they do like the different holidays,
like after Christmas they'll do Valentine's Day and then they'll
do Easter, and I just I think it's so cozy
and I love it. Gianni like kills me and he's like,
get the tree down. But you know what, maybe I'll
say no, and I'll keep the tree up all year
and decorate because that's literally I just love people that
(01:42):
do that. Well.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Nicole has in her house. She has seventeen fucking trees.
Like every kid has one in their bedroom. Each kid
gets on that. Nicole is like four in her bedroom.
Then she has the main one that she has the
one of the foyer, then she has the one on
the kitchen counter, on the kitchen counter in the kitchen.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
On these fucking trees. But you know what, I like Christmas.
It's my favorite time of year and I'm gonna go
crazy and I want my whole house to be a
winter wonderland.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
So did you always love Christmas? To call it when
you were a girl, you always loved it?
Speaker 3 (02:11):
Yes, I always loved it because No, I always loved
it because my family we would just like have family time,
and I don't usually I didn't see my family a lot,
so like Christmas time we would all get together, and
I just loved I just loved like being together and
like playing cards and doing all the things and eating
apple pie with everyone at the table. Like I just
(02:32):
I don't know. It was just very cozy to me.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Stop. That's nostalgic and sweet that you. Do you ever
think that two questions? Would you if you were able
to go back and have siblings, would you have chose siblings?
And two? Was it lonely? Was it lonely?
Speaker 3 (02:52):
That's actually a really good question. I always wanted siblings
just because all my friends had siblings and I wanted
a sibling. But I wasn't lonely because I always had
my best friends over, Like Frankie lived at my house,
I lived at Frankie's. I had Amy I had Steph,
so I was never alone, but I also I did
I did like my alone time, so when I was alone,
(03:12):
I just loved it. And then also I was very spoiled,
like I was the only kid. Yeah, so I feel
like if I had a sibling, I would get so
jealous because I am a very jealous person and I
hate that about myself. But if I had a brother
or sister and my mom was paying more attention to them,
I would kill them.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Do you think, like you know how there's like, like
I have siblings, I'm in the middle child. I wonder
if you would be the middle child even if like
wasn't like, even if you weren't in that category, that
that sequence. I feel like you would be the middle child.
Like I think oldest child is like the more motherly.
I think that in the youngest is like the braddiest
and weirdest. I think you would have be the same
as me, like a middle child syndrome where like you know,
(03:50):
you are just misunderstood and like you know, always like
forgotten about, not forgotten about, do you know what I mean?
I feel like you'd be middle child. I can't see
being motherly as a child.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
No, I think I would be the first child. I
was very motherly as a kid.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Oh you were to your cats.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
Well, I was just I was very shy and I
always wanted to be with family, and yeah I was.
I was not like I am now, Like I was
a totally different person. Oh yeah, I gus started to
change when I was like a teenager, because teenager like then,
like we started like liking boys and wanting to date
(04:30):
and like starting to like drink and try cigarettes.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
Like that's when I love cigarettes.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
I became who I am. But as a kid, no,
I was like I was a baby. I was so shy.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Yeah the weather is ohya you talking about showering. I
woke up this morning and I know, you know, I'm
I'm either here or miss either I'm a disgusting like
a stray cat, and I'm like not showering and I'm
staying in my bed and being discussing for years for
like months, or I'm like cleaning and washing my body
and like doing rituals and doing skincare. Well today, with
that day, I woke up for the first time ever. Normally,
(05:01):
when I wake up, I get up, I go to
the bathroom to pee, and then I go back into
my bedroom and I rot in the bed for like
two hours under the covers of Peaky playing on the
phone before I start my day. This I know. But
this time my alarm went off and started playing my
favorite song. And then I walked to the bathroom to pee,
and I said, you know.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
What, wait, what's the song.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
It's just it's it's it's Hollow Coves Coastlines. It's just
a very calming song to wake up to. It's like
it's like very like meditative and like calming and sweet,
and it's just it just eased me into my day
and it's very it's a very like soft song. So
I had that playing and I'm in the bathroom. I
was like, it was like fight or flight. It's like
(05:45):
should I go out and be and rot in the
bed and just play my phone because I knew I will.
I have a very busy day today. I already had
two meetings this morning, calm down, and I have another
one at four, so I have to and then I
have a birthday party tonight. I'll tell you about later. Anyway,
So I decided, I said, you know what what if
I just turned the shower on and get in the
(06:05):
shower and just like wipe off all the tiredness. I
got in the shower and I the second the water
hit me, I automatically felt rejuvenated. I started using all
my fancy as products. I used my I use my
favorite Cycler body wash. If you're not using Cycler body washing,
call I have to send it to you. It is
like the most sensual experience you ever had in your life.
(06:26):
I used my favorite body wash and I started just
coming alive. Then I got out of the shower and
I used all my skin, a full ten step skincare
routine with my trentonoen and all my oils and creams
I put. I wanted to try a new hair thing
because I got my haircut. I tried all my new
hair products, and then I went out to the bath,
out to the room, put on fresh underwear, and I
started my day. I gotta tell you, I mean, I
(06:48):
know this is a tales all the time, Like I'm
just discovering at forty seven, that's showering in the morning.
It's good for you. But I feel like I got
so much done already, Like I'm already two steps ahead.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:59):
See, so I'm not like a body wash girl. So
I love body wash for like the smell of it.
Like bath and bodyworks, I am a stand for them
till the day I die, Like I just it's it's
just my thing always. So I only do body wash
on my chest and like my neck because I feel
like it'll make me smell good. But like I'm a
Dove girl. I love just a regular Dove bar. I
(07:21):
need like a Dove bar because that makes me feel
like I'm actually like getting clean in the dirt off
if I use the body wash of my whole body.
I don't know, I just feel like I'm not I'm
not getting all the dirt off, do.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
You know what I mean? And it has three quarters
moisturizing cream in it. Do you know that? Remember those
commercials Dev with three quarters moisturizing cream.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
Oh, I love Dove. That's why I think my skin
is always so soft. So I love the regular Dove
and then I love the pink Dove. But yeah, I'm
a bar soap girl.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
Yeah, Oh how exciting. I'm gonna go buy a bar
of Dev soap this week. I love the smell.
Speaker 3 (07:51):
You're gonna be You're gonna be so smooth.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
It smells it smells the cleanest smell.
Speaker 3 (07:56):
Ever, clean fresh, Yes, like the squeezes, well yeah, no,
I don't mind them, but like I would, that's not
not that's not my normal routine. But I don't mind them.
I actually I feel clean when I use them. But yeah,
so I'm usually a nighttime shower person because I can't
go to bed, I can't get into my bed like dirty,
(08:19):
Like I want to be fresh and clean, like I
don't want any stickiness, like I need to be nice
and clean in my bed. But like waking up, like
normally I don't like wake up and shower, but when
I do, like this morning, because I took a shower
last night and then I woke up this morning, I
just felt gross. Taking a shower in the morning is
the best thing. It makes It wakes you up, it
makes you like ready for the day, and I just
(08:41):
feel like that's a lot of work to do every
single day. Though, like showering before bed than showering in
the morning, Like Giohanni does that all the time. That's
his normal routine, and he thinks I'm so gross not
showering in the morning, But I'm like, I just showered
at night.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
So does Billy Oh my god, Billy is a creep shower,
like a freak shower. He shows like.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
You want to be fresh for the door, Like I
am fresh. I just lay in bed like I'm fine.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
Yeah, Like I don't sweat, I just move, I just
lay there. Yeah. But I can't get in the bed
without having a shower because I get self tannered everywhere,
all my makeup and oils and all the things I
have throughout the day.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
The one time I did it is probably you know,
like when we're drinking and we're like, oh, I don't care,
I'm just gonna go to bed, and then you wake
up and you feel you feel gross, you feel like
a dirt. Yeah, so I love showers.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
Fresh fresh. Well, now that's so fucking hot out there's
there's air warnings everywhere this summer. It's like people there's
those wildfires were happening, and there was there's this smog.
People are walking around wearing K and K and ninety
five masks all around the city from the from the heat,
humidity and all through that. We were discussing growing up though,
like in this in the nineties, like growing up in
(09:53):
the summertime, I would did you go self tanned obviously
went self tanning. You have your own standing line. Let's
talk how we yeah growing up? Wait, let's talk about.
Speaker 3 (10:05):
Do you want to know a crazy secret? Though?
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Yes, I'd be honored.
Speaker 3 (10:10):
When I was in high school because I you know,
I was brown, because I'm fan Spanish, I'm very brown,
and my school was like everyone, you know, there's a
lot of white kids and I only had like two
black friends and that was like the whole you know,
there was just no brown people. Okay, yeah, So I
was like every time we would go out to eat,
(10:32):
like outside, there was tables and this is so crazy
that I ever did this because it's so not me.
But we would be outside and I'd be wearing shorts
and it's the summertime. I would cover my legs and
a towel and I didn't want the sun to touch
me because I didn't want to get brown, Like what
is sin? Can you imagine?
Speaker 2 (10:50):
Oh my god?
Speaker 3 (10:51):
I didn't want to be too dark and like not
match my friends, Like what a fucking sin? Now, I'd
be like, bitch, you are beautiful, your skin is stunning.
Go get brown. So how crazy is that that? Like
I didn't want to get too dark?
Speaker 2 (11:03):
In high school internalized racism.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
Crazy, and now I'm just like, ugh, I lay out
anytime the sun's out. I will go lay out for
at least ten minutes. Like I love being tanned.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
Well, that's good. That's a lot of that's a lot
of self discovery. You know, it takes a lot to
admit that.
Speaker 3 (11:20):
It's just crazy. How I was like that?
Speaker 2 (11:22):
Like, but then then you became the poster child for
being for being tanned tanned?
Speaker 3 (11:29):
Like how crazy? And yeah, loving bronze and bronzer and tanning. Yeah,
thank god, I you know, I became who I am.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
Waiting a cole There's a new setting spray out that
has self tanning and that self say, it's a bronzer
setting make up setting spray. I'm dying to get it.
So it's like, you know how I always spray that
pink can on you, the one sized beauty, that pink cannon.
It holds your make on forever. Well, now they have
two bronze flavors, so you can like spray it on
your face after your makeup so doesn't make you, it
still makest tan and it gives you like a glow.
(12:03):
So I need to get that.
Speaker 3 (12:05):
Well, yeah, if you're listening, please send us it. I
would love to try that.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
There's like a cocoa glow and then like a golden
glow I think of. They are called one sized Beauty.
Patrick Star, if you're listening, sen I've met that's Jeffree Star.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Oh, Patrick Patrick Star.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
Patrick Star is the one that has the turban on.
I believe he's a Filipino if I'm not mistaken.
Speaker 3 (12:31):
Oh, I don't think I know who.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Yes you do, He's yes, you do. He's got the
big head wrap on, and he's like bold and beautiful
and big smile and like you know, he's like, oh
I have to look Yeah, Patrick Starry. I have all
the products one size powders I use on him, but
the broad spread I love that. But like I isn't
it funny? How like we're still ourselves, but we have
(12:57):
to you have to change with the times. Like when
we were growing up, let's talk about tanning beds, like
what let's talk about like what our week looked like
before going out to the weekend. Like me, so for instance,
like tanning beds, like I was addicted so much, I
have to say, And it was like a whole lifestyle.
It wasn't just like you're going to tanks. It was
like it was like who's working the tanks on? Who
(13:17):
are you going to run into there? It was our
It was like it was a social club. It was
like it was a status symbol. Like if you if
you knew the bitchy girl that worked behind the counter,
and she's like neew, you're back to her the same
Oh you're gonna be in bed five tonight. Okay, yeah,
all right, do you want to stick our? You want
you want tangle? And it's like it's it was a
whole ritual. And we would all get tanning packages and
we would go I would and then and then once
(13:38):
you were addicted, I would go on my lunch break.
I worked at the mall, and I knew I was
going out. And that's one may. We used to go
out every single night, every single night of the week.
We were going out to a different bar. Literally our schedule,
so we knew, like it was a Tuesday, we were
going to Scotti's or wherever. While we're going to so
it's like, okay, I gotta get Tanford today, so I
and could you buy a monthly package? And if you
(13:59):
didn't use it, you lose it. So you were allowed
to go every day, right, once a week. Once it
was every day, right.
Speaker 3 (14:06):
Well, you know you're not supposed you weren't supposed to
go every single day. Were supposed to be more times
a week.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
But if you could, because you bought a monthly package.
You get thirty tans that month, and if you don't
use them, you lose them. So we I went every
fucking day. So I would go, and this is what
I would do. I would go to my lunch break
to go instead of eating, because you know, we wasn't
gonna eat it to be tan, and I would go tank.
I'd come back after putting the tingle lotion on and
I looked fucking purple. I looked purple from that cell.
(14:34):
That's that tingle tanner. Oh bitch, yeah, And I would
I would look crazy.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Really a fan of the tingle, yeah, because it like
hurt and I just yeah, I feel like there was
like no really good benefit. I just feel like I didn't.
I didn't like the feeling it.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Made you so much tanner, Like it wasn't really tann
it was just irritating your skin. It was like lip
plumper for your body. It was like it and it burned.
It was hard.
Speaker 3 (14:56):
Well, going to the tanning salon that was like that
was like therapeutic for me, just like laying in there
listening to the music and you feel so like cozy
and warm and you know you're getting a nice tan,
you're gonna feel skinny. Like it was just so relaxing
to me. It's like going to the spaw and getting massage.
That's how it felt for me.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
It was competitive too. It's like if it's like the
thing my friends and like people are other people at
the bars, like if you weren't tanned, like and you
and you didn't get like a good a good, a
good session that week, like you like you were chopped
and ugly, Like.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Oh, if you went with your girlfriends and you all
came out and you were like, who's darker? It was me?
Speaker 2 (15:36):
I would would double dips, so then I would start.
Then I would start to go spray tanning first, and
then I would go into the bed and bake it in.
I would after I sprayed it on, I would go
in theater that doesn't take it in. And then sometimes
like my friend, like I already went tanning that day,
but my friend had hers, so I would go there
with her and we would stand in the standing thing together.
We'd get in together and just to get a little
(15:59):
extra kick before the ball.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Are Oh you did the standing bed I didn't. I
never liked those I did.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
I was like, eh, And then when I was really
in my in my darkest moments, I would do it.
I had two different places I would go. I would
go to the one place, tan there, and then because
they're not gonna let you do twice in one day,
I would go to a second place and tan there.
I'm surprised. I'm surprised our skin didn't fall off.
Speaker 3 (16:25):
Yeah, I didn't do it that bad because I knew
I didn't want my skin to fall off because you're
already an Yeah. And the one time I went like
three days in a row and everything hurt, so I
was like, maybe I shouldn't do it this much.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Yeah, I've burned my didn't you burn your ass at
the tannel jersey shoreing? Just sit in the refrigerator.
Speaker 3 (16:49):
Yeah, that's when. So we came back from Italy and
we were in Italy for like a month and a half,
and like the girls, they didn't have like nails, there,
so we couldn't get our nails on. Our nails were disgusting.
We like ripped our nails off. We felt so gross.
And then we couldn't go tanning, so there was like
no tanning beds and we were hardly laying out. So
when we got back to Jersey, we were so deprived
(17:10):
of everything that we just ran and did all the things.
So we went to the uh nail salon, got our
nails done, and then me and Paulie went tanning more
than everybody else because like we wanted to be like
the Tannis and we ended up. Polly burned his space,
I burned my ass. Yeah, it wasn't great because we
we didn't tanned for a month and a half. Yeah,
we didn't shrivel up and die.
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Is America the only place that has tanning beds?
Speaker 3 (17:35):
Well, yeah, America is the only place.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
That's I'm sure they have. No, they definitely have them.
And those all those all those people like those uh
those Chavs in the Gordy Shore like all those, they
definitely have it in England. In Ireland, they definitely have
tanning beds there. I don't think Paris has them. I'd
be shocked. If I saw them in.
Speaker 3 (17:56):
Paris, it would probably be so chic though.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
Yeah, yeah, it probably has probably offer you Champagne. I
would love that. What is that?
Speaker 3 (18:07):
I love Rocky? I like to hit Rocky like is Belly?
He likes it.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Stop. Does he come in the car with you?
Speaker 3 (18:18):
He loves the car.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Car. Never, I'll go for it.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
We have to bring in the car, Piki.
Speaker 2 (18:28):
You don't have a car, no, So Peaky goes in
cabs and the uber sometimes.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
Yeah. But does he like lean out in the window.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
Yeah, he likes to look at the windows when I drive, though.
He likes to sit on my lap though, look at
the window when I'm driving. I like when I had
I used to take zip cars everywhere.
Speaker 3 (18:44):
What are we gonna do when when we don't have
them anymore?
Speaker 2 (18:47):
Stop, I'm going I've told you. I'm putting myself down
the same day as him, Peaky, But like getting ready
before before the bar. In the nineties, it's like it
was a whole ritual, Like we first of all drunk driving.
Let's bring that up, like we were drunk driving every day, Oh.
Speaker 3 (19:02):
My god, horrible friends. Everybody would do it in.
Speaker 2 (19:06):
School every day like you would. There was no ubers,
we drove to the bar, I mean not drunk driving,
and we would we would we would pregame at the
house and like you know, because because it was like
we had to get drunk before you went into the bar,
because first of all, we didn't have money to drink,
and the drinks weren't even expensive back then probably now
compared to now. But like we would have to drink.
So what I would do is I would after channing
(19:27):
all day and buying outfits of the Abercrombie and frying
my skin, I would we would drive either this is
my favorite thing we'd do. We would drive to the bar,
but have to stop at the liquor store. At first.
We'd get this thing called Cisco which was like this
like this like like booze wine. Like it was like
it was like moonshine. It was disgusting. Look it up. Yeah,
(19:48):
c I s CEO. We would have that in our
car and then we'd sit in the parking lot of
the hugging of the bar, chugging the alcohol in the
in our cars, smoking cigarettes and blasting CDs in the
car and the parking lot of the gay bar or
the bar we were at, sitting in the car, we
get fucked up and we had to drink that enough.
So then when he got inside alls we'd have to
buy is like two drinks because we were belligerately drunk
(20:11):
sitting in our car chain smoking cigarettes in the parking
lot of the place.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
Yeah, so we so I feel like none of us
like wanted to drive, and also we had no money
to get gas to like drive wanted to We wanted
to spend our money on the drinks and I'm talking
like twenty bucks a week, you know, like nothing. So
we would have Steph's brother drive, but he was so
like he wasn't like into like drinking or anything. Like
(20:40):
he like if we were drinking, he would yell at
us and tell us to throw it out, So we
would like put it in water bottles and as he's driving,
we would like to chug it pretending it's water and
like not make a face, and then after we were done,
we would throw it out the window so he knows
we weren't doing it. So we had like all all
the big brothers and sisters drive us everywhere because we
had no money for gas.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
Yeah, grass was a thing that was obviously still is
a thing, but yeah, we everything, We everything that week
in our whole lives just depended on the one thing.
It was going out, having money to drink and being
tanned and having a cute outfit. It's like that's all
we cared about. So we'd get drunk in the car,
then we'd go inside and get by like maybe like
three or four drinks. That's it because that's all we
(21:23):
could afford unless boys bought us drinks, and then we're forward.
But at the end of the night, like cause we
never we never left a bar until the lights came on,
like you you shut every place down every night of
the week.
Speaker 3 (21:33):
Yes, many times they would kick me out to be like, man,
we're closing, and like I had a missing shoe and
I was just walking out with one shoe and like
leaving my credit card there or no, my my debit
card and I had to go back or my license.
I'd go back in the morning, like do you have
my shoe and my license? Like that was like a
daily thing for me.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
Oh my god. Yeah, we shut it down. And then
but about about like if you you always said that
was like guess who was going to drive home? And
it was always like a thing like you had to
act the drunkest so they you know, they knew you
wouldn't have to drive home because if no one wants
to risk getting dui, it was very risky. So whoever
the bravest one was would drive the car to drive
the car home, like knowing what the risk was. And
it was like we it was not even a thing,
(22:15):
like there was no question about it.
Speaker 3 (22:16):
Never did taxis. I feel like taxis were very busy.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
No, we'd have taxis and we would go we wo'd.
Speaker 3 (22:22):
Drive there were taxis out outside of the outside.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Of the bars like wine, you know, we would drive
far to the bars, like the bars we would go
to we're like forty five minutes away, Like we would
drive like forty five minutes we drive to Philly, Like
we drive to Philly on a Tuesday night.
Speaker 3 (22:36):
Oh yeah, like ten minutes away.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
No, those regular bars like Scotti, so things like that.
We had bars like in bet like right there in
our towns. But like sometimes you go far away. But
so you would have to stop drinking like you would
if you Our thing was like are we did you
drink like an hour? Stop drinking an hour before you
had to drive because then and then that was that
was considered you were the most responsible, and like it
was considered Okay, I'm being responsible and by stopping drinking
(23:01):
it for the.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
Hour, Yeah, chugging, chugging water, chugging like ten glasses of water,
and then and then having lollipops.
Speaker 2 (23:12):
Lollipops, Yeah, I have lollipops. We would drive. I would
drive right then you would drive. The best part of
leaving was, you know, to go to Taco Bell and McDonald's.
It's like we'd go to the drive the drive.
Speaker 3 (23:23):
Through week McDonald's all day, yes.
Speaker 2 (23:25):
Oh my god, and get like whatever you can get.
Like we'd scrounge up change coins from from the bottom
of our seats and our horse scranging up coins to
get Taco Bell and we would just fucking binge eat
the Taco Bell. In the car there was wrappers every
We were disgusting, disgusting. And then the next day you
wake up, you do it all again, go to work,
(23:47):
ten on your lunch break, get.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
Your We had to be up early, like we had
to be at work at like eight thirty nine o'clock.
And I was still like feeling drunk, and I still
went to work and did the thing. And then came
back home and like, did it again? I can't do
that now.
Speaker 2 (24:05):
No, it's it was every everyone exaggerated that the gen
Zers have no idea. We're not exaggerating. It was seven
days a week going out to a bar every drinking
like an animal, every single day, Monday through Sunday, like
every single day there was a different thing. Monday was
this bar, Tuesday's this bar, and it was it was.
(24:25):
It was like full on drinking. I don't know how
we didn't die, And like I can't even imagine drinking.
I drank that wine a couple of nights, a couple
of weeks ago. I'm still hungover from it. It's like
I can't imagine drinking, Like how did we not die?
Speaker 3 (24:37):
But it's so weird though, because we like trained our
bodies to do that, Like we are so tough and resilient, Mina.
I know when you're getting older, like your body changes
or whatever, but we should still be able to hang
a little bit, Like I don't know why. It's just
getting harder and harder to really have a good time
and be okay the next day.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
And it's rude, Nicole. If we drank the way we did,
then all those calories, we would be seven hundred pounds
shut ins.
Speaker 3 (25:03):
They had to I would be a thousand pounds. Only
do so every time before like a bar or anything,
because like we hardly had any alcohol, we hardly had
any money, but obviously we wanted to like get buzzed
before we went. We would do power hour with beer. Yeah,
and that you guys, I don't know if you've ever
(25:23):
tried that, but that you could have one beer and
you put it in a shot and you take the
shot of the beer every minute, every minute for an hour,
you get rocked off your ass and it's one beer.
So if you guys are trying to save money, try
it out. You literally get you get drunk or.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Or I remember you used to if you drank beer
through a straw, like hit you harder, or like he
drank drinks through a straw, it's supposed to hit you harder.
Speaker 3 (25:51):
I still think that's the thing. Is that still not real?
Is that?
Speaker 2 (25:55):
I don't know? I don't know. I wait and remember
how bars would have breathalyzer machines and we would try
to who can get the most fucked up and blow
and get the highest number. Yes, that was the thing.
They was to get one, but we Hoppy gave me one.
They started selling them at like the Dollar store, was like,
you know, one for your car. He put me in
the glove compartment just so I had it.
Speaker 3 (26:14):
Now they have I just saw on TikTok they have
the key chain breathalysers. And when I'm like starting to
feel buzz, I want to see.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
What I blow. Yeah, to see because you don't even
know what it is like now I don't even know.
Speaker 3 (26:29):
Because now I could get drunk off of one wine
or but if I'm like if I'm traveling and I'm
like drinking, it's going to take more than that.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
But yeah, yeah, and then they have cigarette machines in
the place. Now they've even I think they have eight machines.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
Now, oh yeah, I saw that they do have vight machines.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
So yeah, I don't know how we made it through.
It's like we were driving drunk, putting our livers through things.
It's giving us our skin cancer.
Speaker 3 (26:58):
Hardly sleeping a little. Just now we are we were
killing it.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
We show we're killing it. Yeah. I shower spraytam and
they spray tam. Yeah, okay, I talked to you about
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(27:25):
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And reading, No, you know I'm reading. I'm reading. I
read an exert from a book. It was a lifer
an ex ex expert, an excerpt, an expert, an excerpt.
(28:30):
I was reading from an accomplished Chilean not an author,
and I believe it's I believe it's was Confessions of
a Guidette. It was that even if you're wearing your
hair curly book, even if you're wris to wearing your
hair curly, you always have to flat eyron your hair beforehand.
You're going out without flat Should I get the book?
Should I get the book? Do you have a book?
(28:52):
I have it read here.
Speaker 3 (28:55):
So this is one of my favorite books, you guys.
It was my easiest book to do because it's like
how to would be a guida. So it was like
all the things that I do, like style wise, makeup wise,
basically giving you advice on how to be me, which
is crazy. I can't believe that's a thing. But it
was my easiest book and I loved it.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
Okay, there she is. Okay. This this week's book on
the Q Document Book Club is from a Chilean author,
Nicole Polizzi. Okay, and it says, and I'm gonna read
from the back and then we're gonna find out some
stuff that we need to know. It says my big
This is a quote from the from the author, My
(29:35):
biggest nightmare is waking up pale or without eyelashes. Is
that still true? Spooky?
Speaker 3 (29:40):
Same?
Speaker 2 (29:42):
Okay. Next is and I quote a guidat has to
know how to have fun anywhere, Like if you're stuck
in a cardboard box, you have to rock it first
of all, it rocket? Is that still true? Can you
still have fun in a cardboard box? Spooky? Yes? I can.
Speaker 3 (29:57):
I am still fun.
Speaker 2 (30:00):
And the third third quote is I love my slippers.
It's like wearing beds on your feet.
Speaker 3 (30:05):
Still wearing slippers.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Oh my god, this is so funny. We're coming full.
Speaker 3 (30:09):
Fource it's still the same.
Speaker 2 (30:12):
Okay. Next quote, If you can smell hairjel from a
mile away, it signals Guido mating season. Do you still
sell Gianni's hair gel from downstairs when he's in his bathroom.
Speaker 3 (30:22):
I feel like it's more the cologne, But yes, I
smell the hairspry. He does hairspray, so yes, I could
still smell it.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
I love that Billy doesn't wear cologne. I love hairspry
and he has and he has such a he's do
you know that he has. He has a nose of
a hound dog like he can smell if I put
like a face cream on or something and he's like,
he's like I'm getting a migraine. Like he's so annoying
with candles like he does. I can't light anything. I
can't have anything smelling around him. So he doesn't wear
(30:48):
a clone, but I wish he was.
Speaker 3 (30:50):
It's the worst.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
I wish he had a signature scent because I can
like wear his clothes, take his clothes and like wear
them as pillowcases. And I wish he had a scent
so I can like sniff him all the time. Okay.
Next quote, is I like to wear so many accessories
that people are genuinely confused.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
Yeah, I still like that.
Speaker 2 (31:10):
I still love But now your accessories are all like
beautiful diamonds that you got from your jeweler. They're not
like tacky like clips and stuff.
Speaker 3 (31:18):
Well I still wear tacky earrings and stuff like hoops
and like cheap poops and stuff. I still do that,
but yeah, my rings I like to I like diamonds. No.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
Now, this is a large quote. It says and I
quote gweenettes are born with attitude. It doesn't matter if
you're tall, skinny, round, or a smurf. What's your or
what's your background or what your background is. We put
on our bronze and we frickin' rock our princess status. Like,
get out of the way. I don't care. We don't
care what you think unless you're a mirror.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
See I I was always an all inclusive girl. So
like everyone that would like meet me, they'd be like, oh,
I want to be a meatball, but I'm too tall.
I'm like, being a meatball doesn't mean you're short and fat.
It means you could be whatever you want. Being a
meeple is like your energy and how you bring it,
so it's not about what you look like, but it's
about your energy and how fun you are and how
(32:11):
amazing you are. I always said that to people and
they were like, oh.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
Oh my god, I didn't know I'm reading the thank
you I've I've never thumbed for this book. I don't
think I've ever even opened it. You think, thank you
to you, thanked all your MTV people. Okay, Okay, these
are the chapters that we're going to read from on
this week's book club, from this Chilean author Spooky Nicole
Snoozy Paloozy.
Speaker 3 (32:38):
And adapted Chilean author.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
Yes, okay, so there's nine chapters you can choose from here.
We are Okay. Chapter one, How to be Aguiet? Chapter two,
The Style Snooky Style Revolution, Chapter three, My Favorite Things
Chapter four, Reality Star Princess. Chapter five, My Jet set Life,
Calm Down, Calm Down? Where were you going Vegas? My
(33:02):
Life as a Party Girl? Sixth My Lover six My
Life is a Party seventh, Snooking for Love. We were
supposed to have a show, remember that.
Speaker 3 (33:10):
We're actually Yeah, and then I fell in love with
Johnny Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
Number eighth.
Speaker 3 (33:14):
I feel like everyone would watch that. Can you imagine?
I was kind of going off of Tila Tequila.
Speaker 2 (33:19):
I'm oh my god, I remember her. Yeah, but eight
gt L according to me and number nine outside the Spotlight.
Oh that's her true self. Which which chapter do you
want me to read from?
Speaker 3 (33:31):
Just just just surprise it?
Speaker 2 (33:33):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (33:34):
Stop, okay, yeah stop?
Speaker 2 (33:38):
Whoa? What is it now?
Speaker 3 (33:41):
My just hat life?
Speaker 2 (33:42):
Please?
Speaker 3 (33:42):
Now, I can't say.
Speaker 2 (33:49):
This must be fashion week? This says every greet at
outing is a party. What to rock? You say? If
you say rock one more fucking time in this book Rocket,
this is the Lilah of the fucking of the book.
Speaker 3 (34:01):
No, that had to be my ghost rider putting that ins.
I've never said wrong.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
I've only read three things in the Rocket. Okay, okay.
Club A short, tight dress that shows off legs and
a butt crack or do something hot so you stand out,
big ass earrings, lots of blank four inch heels minimum.
And then if you're going to a bar, black or
animal print leggings or skinny jeans with four inch plus
(34:26):
heels or boots and a hot top. If you're going
to a friend's house. If you're going to a friend's house,
comfy clothes, juicy sweats, leggings, shorts, or a long T shirt. Yes,
if you're going shopping Mountie Petties with the girls, you're
gonna wear boots or flip flops and a kick ass tea.
I'm literally gonna fucking rip this book apart. Kick ass tea.
(34:48):
Don't forget the hate. Don't forget the hate. Block as
b l O c ka Z the hate I'm going
to I'm giving it. I'm giving this. I'm giving this
to Sissy's as you can read it. The high and eyelashes,
because we.
Speaker 1 (35:02):
Should give this to the schools. This is this is history, okay.
And the eye learn about this, and the eye lashes
because they make comfy clothes look sexy. And your birthday
party lesson foremost, first and foremost something to celebrate your
bad self and a t are with bling.
Speaker 2 (35:20):
Keep your boobies up when you're lying down. I hate
when you're lying down and you're with your juice head
and your boobs are flying onto your back and you
suddenly have a flat chest. Cut your elbows together. Unless
you're Jenny her boobs divie gravity and I'm obsessed with
her breasts. I love you, whore.
Speaker 3 (35:36):
This was before my boob jobs. I hated that I
hate when your boobs are nice and perky and the
dress then you lay down and they're in your back.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
You met Tim McGraw, I met everybody. That was my
mother's favorite, my signature drink the pickle teeny, my own creation.
Two warnings, no lightweights allowed, and be and you better
bring pickles one part vodka, half part pickle juice from
a jar. Pickles. You were no, you were ahead of
the trend. People are drinking dirty Martini's everywhere now and
(36:09):
a pickle teenie is just like you were really drinking
vodka and pickle juice back then.
Speaker 3 (36:13):
Yes, it was my favorite thing. I would mix it
in the shorehouse. I would take shots of pickle juice
and vodka. And I'm getting no, I'm getting no recognition
for any of it.
Speaker 2 (36:25):
I can't believe this. There's your mini mouse.
Speaker 3 (36:28):
All right, save it for the next episode.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (36:31):
I like our book club.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
Yeah, so that was That was this week's book club.
We're gonna read more from our authors, and you're sitting
in front of Tanny bed of course. Okay, wait, speaking
of nostalgia, and like the bars me and my friends
we used to do sometimes when we were hungover, or
like we didn't know what we wanted to eat, like
it was. You had to be very specific. Otherwise if
you didn't hit the craven you needed after the hangover,
(36:55):
like you know, say, we would have to outsource. So
like if everyone wants to go to McDonald's, like, Okay,
I love McDonald's, I want the Big Mac, but I
don't want their chicken nuggets. I hate their chicken nuggets.
Don't hate their chicken I'm just using this as a reference.
I love McDonald's chicken nuggets. But we would go up
the road was called Route twenty two. That's where the
big highway with all the stores on it that were
where I grew up in New Jersey, and we would
(37:18):
do a tour of Root twenty two, me and Jamie.
So Jamie would be driving orribe driving, and we would
go to like Taco Bell and we get the girl's
stuff Brito, then we go get fries from McDonald's. Then
we go get White Castle Burger, and we get all
the things like we go like hoarding all the best
things from each place, and then we go home. Yes,
and or if we're ordering and we do a tour
(37:39):
of the world, we do our EPCOT Center order I want.
Michell would order Chinese from this place we get should
get Chinese. I would order pizza, and then Jamie would
order Mexican, and then when it all got there, we
would be we'd like put on I think we would
be like nude. We would just be like no clothes
on because we guve pigs, and we would just be
like literally and elastic with pants. The lights all turned
(38:00):
like the windows clothed, and we would just sit on
the fucking sectional and we would eat all around the
world and have a global, a global cuisine party. I
want to do that for my next my next dinner party.
Speaker 3 (38:11):
Yeah, so I we would do. I would do the
Burger King Chicken sandwich, but I didn't really love their
flat for their fries, so I would do the burger
King Chicken sandwich and then I would go to McDonald's
and get the fries and a drink, because no, nothing
beats the Burger King Chicken sandwich for me, like so
freaking good. And then now yes, and now I love
(38:34):
to do sometimes I sometimes I still do that, like
if I'm hungover, I will order I'll I'll door Dash
or Uber Eats, the the just just the chicken sandwich
from Burger King and then like two fries and a
drink for McDonald's. Because it's just I just that's just
what I like. There's things that I like at certain places.
But you know, now, if I'm like traveling and I'm tired,
(38:58):
like not even hungover, just like fucking tired, and I
don't care and I just want to be happy, I
will do like like a full blown pizza menu. So
I'll get like a pepperoni stuff cruss pizza, and then
I will get a pepperoni col zone, and then I
will do cheese sticks, and then I'll do breadsticks. Like
every and anything you could think of that has cheese
(39:21):
and pepperoni on it, I'm getting it. And I'm just
I'm taking a bite of everything like I need. I
need options when it comes to cheese and pepperoni. Like
I just don't want the pizza. I want more things.
Speaker 2 (39:31):
Well that's why they do so well, those pizzaias, because
they have a re option for it. I crave, you know,
it's crazy, I crave lettuce. I think it's because I have,
like I have this thing, a dehydration thing, like when
I'm when I'm going to bed, like hungover or drunk
and I'm dehydrated, Like I'm so thirsty. I dream about drinking,
about drinking water and drinking sodas, and like, going from
my dreams will be like like a whole adventure trying
(39:55):
to get to the soda machine or trying to get
to the water bottle.
Speaker 3 (39:57):
Or trying to I love chugging water when you're hungover,
Like you literally wake up in the middle of the
night and you feel like you're in a desert and
you're like, oh my god, I'm so thirsty, and then
you chug. It feels so nice.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
I know, so I but so the next day when
I'm hungover, I'm craving cold, crisp lettuce, like lettuce like
I cause I think it's a I think it's a
part of the water and refreshing. I still I don't
just want a salad, but I need to have something
cold and refreshing and crunchy with my thing, because it's
a it's a form of hydration, I think.
Speaker 3 (40:25):
So, Like that's why you never I've never craved just salad.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
When I was hungover, I crave it, like, but not
not not just to eat a salad. I crave it
because I what I do is, you know, my favorite
thing in the world is to get a pizza and
then I get a salad, a chopp salad, and I
use my pizza as and I like the vinegar. I
love the vinegar flavor with the pizza, so I crave.
I get a big chop salad and I take my
pizzas and I use it as a scoop shovel. I
(40:50):
put it all on the skuf like that. Eat the
pizza with the salad, so it's again you're cheesy and crunchy,
create cheesy and gooey and crispy, and then you get
the fresh refrunch and crunch the vinegar salad.
Speaker 3 (41:01):
I love it.
Speaker 2 (41:02):
That's my favorite thing. And that's does me right well.
Speaker 3 (41:05):
Now that we're like, you know, trying to eat healthier
and be better human beings. When you are craving like
the pizza, and you're not hungover, you're just like craving,
you know, like pizza or whatever. Now I and I
tried this. It's very good. You put mozadel cheese on
the sove and you kind of make a bread out
of it, you know, it gets like nice and hard
(41:27):
and then you put pepperoni on it, and then you
eat it just like that. So it's just the cheese
and the pepperoni and it's a nice little snack and
you're not eating the carbs and you don't feel like
a fat ass.
Speaker 2 (41:37):
After what do you do? You just put cheese on
an enlighteness? What is this new spooky snooky stack?
Speaker 3 (41:43):
You put the cheese on a pant all over TikTok. Yeah,
so no bread, you put cheese, Just put cheese so
it gets nice and hard so it feels like a crust.
And then you just put pepperonium whatever toppings you want
and that's literally your pizza without the.
Speaker 2 (41:55):
Carbs on the pan.
Speaker 3 (41:57):
Yes, look it up on TikTok. It's a thing oh
so good and you don't feel like fat, and you
don't feel like you're mad at yourself for you know,
eating it, because you know you're trying to eat healthy
and everything. But I crave cheese and I crave pepperoni
a lot because it's my favorite thing.
Speaker 2 (42:16):
Well, Spookie, this has been lovely.
Speaker 3 (42:17):
This has been so lovely.
Speaker 2 (42:19):
I have to go spray, I have to go to
the tanning bed, drinking a parking lot and yes and
yeah and just and drive and drive drunk.
Speaker 3 (42:28):
So I think you have to go blow out my
hair and put a poof in and put in cheap jewelry.
Speaker 2 (42:34):
Well, it's been Lovely Crusader's second Lovely tuning into the
hit podcast. It's happening so you can joy. Make sure
to fallows on all platforms like Common and subscribe and
we will see you next week on Whip Him At Wednesday.
Speaker 3 (42:46):
Lovely Bitches, it's happening with Nookie and Joey
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