June 29, 2026 • 54 mins
"I know so many very successful people and I've got to say joy is not in abundance among them…I find that the most joyful people are the ones who are surrounded by the ones that they love." -Jodie Turner-Smith
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
Hey guys, Well, summer is here, and you know, I'm
going to try to do every summer because I feel
like during the regular year, we're sprinting. I'm missing things,
We're racing through things, We're getting to the next thing.
I mean, I even think about it when I'm getting
my kids ready for school. It's like, get your shoes,
(00:31):
get your shoes, let's go, let's go. I feel like
we're always in motion and in fast, crazy, fast paced.
So let's talk about what happens when we slow it down.
Don't have to be summertime to slow down, but just
to slow it down. Because what's weird is I think
when we slow our days down, and we can do
(00:52):
it intentionally, like it feels like there's more time in
the day, it feels like there's more room to flush
it out. It feels like everything slows down. And so
when summer comes, since we don't have all the deadlines,
it's the idea of taking it slow. Like what I
like to do on a summer day is have one
(01:13):
mini plan during the day, whether it's go to the
pool or do something. The rest of the day, I
feel like it should breathe. And I've noticed something about myself,
and I don't know if you guys have this. When
I'm rushing, my kids hardly say anything because they're always
being rushed. We don't have any kind of conversations that
(01:33):
are any good. The best convos I find come either
late at night when you're putting your child down. At night,
when you're putting your child down and there's nowhere to
go except to sleep, when I'm driving, because they're not
staring at me, and they for some reason, they just
start talking it all out, and when I'm in slow motion.
(01:53):
So here's an example of one of my daughters. So
we were in the bathroom and she was using the
bathroom when were reading a book together. She's seven and
so she so I was sitting there and I thought,
let me just ask her this question. I said, so, honey,
my daughter has type one diabetes. She was diagnosed when
(02:16):
she was almost five. And so I said, can I
ask you a question? I said, what's it like to
have diabetes? Because I never really asked her that, you know,
and anyone who's got a child or knows someone with
diabetes knows there's a lot of insulin and shots and
monitoring and you know, all that stuff. And she said, well,
(02:38):
sometimes it feels kind of unfair because all the other
kids get cupcakes and I don't sometimes and kids are
always asking me, like what is that thing on your arm?
And sometimes my legs feel wobbly. And she was just
going through all the things that come with being a
little kid with diabetes. Yes, and I was listening so
(03:03):
and she said so, but I guess that's life, right, mom,
something like that. And I said, yeah, honey, And she said, well,
what's it like for you to have me? I said, oh,
my God, like it's one of the greatest blessings of
my life to have you. I said, I'm learning so
much from you, and I'm watching your resilience and you know,
and I'm talking on and on and she blurts out
(03:24):
in the middle the middle of it, like wipe me, mom,
or something like that. But the point is is like
that conversation would not have come had I not slowed down,
if I'd been racing like I do. To hurry up
and brush your teeth and wipe yourself and move on
and let's go and in the car, put on your seatbelt.
(03:45):
You know, all the things I would have missed it.
And so my summer intention is to slow down, is
to have real conversations that are rich and full and beautiful,
and they're all around us, and I think sometimes we
miss them because we're too busy getting to the next thing.
(04:06):
I remember Maria Shriver told me the story once that
she had a million things to do and she was
talking to her friend on the phone. She was in
the car, friend was on speaker and she's like, I'm late.
I have to go here, and I have to go there.
And she said, Marie, where are you going? But he goes,
I'm going to this place, and I'm going to that place,
and then I'm going to this place. And she said, Maria,
where are you going? And she realized she didn't know
(04:31):
where she was going. She was, you know, just going
fast to nowhere. So anyway, this is a long way
of saying, slow down, summer, and let's slow it all down.
Which brings me to my next guest. Okay, she's got
(04:51):
a three namer, Jody Turner Smith. So Jody is such
a fascinating person. Okay. She is from Jamaica. Originally, her
mom's from Jamaica. She was born in England and she
lived there for ten years then she moved to the States.
This is a person who has such crazy tenacity, such
(05:13):
a student and became an actress. I mean, you probably
know her from the Agency, which is an incredible series
where she is like fantastic in this series. You might
know her from some of her earlier work, which is
Queen and Slim. She's played Anne Boleyn And for those
(05:34):
of you who are Swifties, she happens to have been
in a Taylor Swift video. What's fascinating about her is
how she defines joy and how she defines success. Everyone's
kind of got their own trip when it comes to
those kinds of things. Sometimes she needs more and more
and more and more, and maybe you're still not joyful. Well,
(05:55):
I think Jody has sort of cracked that nut. She
understands where her sweets are is. She's got a six
year old daughter, she's acting, and she's living this very
joyful and wonderful life. And she sprinkles her interview with
beautiful life lessons. So I hope you enjoy my conversation
with actress Jody Turner Smith. Oh wait a minute, glam
(06:27):
has hit the zoom listen.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
I did my own glam today.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
Oh you did not That's impossible. I did what's the
wand I want to know what wand was used for
that that hair because that took work.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
Listen, listen.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
You know what I've been so getting into is doing
those little soft rollers at night.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Come on, you know the ones that like of course
it's like old school.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Is everything, and last night too is my I was
like this big.
Speaker 3 (07:01):
Oh please, you know it reverts when with any kind
of moisture outside, and it was like so big, and
I was like, I remember, it was like it was
like eleven o'clock last night and I was outside and
I was like, why didn't I put on like a
bonnet or something. My hair is going to be so
missed up. I have to do it myself tomorrow. And
then before I went to bed, I was like, you
know what, I was eyeing those furlos and I was like,
(07:24):
let me just.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
Okay, well this is I think you need to do
something on that, because if this is the result of that. Man.
By the way, I always say like I have weather
sensitive hair. Every time I step out in the rain,
it's like I feel like there's incoming fire. I'm like,
my kids know I have a seven year old and
a nine year old when it starts raining, they're like,
let's go. They understand that we got trouble when it's raining.
Speaker 3 (07:47):
Okay, I know, you know what I I've always been
like just shorthair gully, and so it's like for me,
I'm like, oh gosh, you know this just having to be.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
Cognizant of sensitive to the weather. It's like a new thing.
Speaker 1 (08:03):
Yes, but.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
I'm adapted.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Well, okay, it's all making sense now. In high school,
you were most likely to succeed. I understand from this
brief interaction that, of course that's what they voted because
of course that's what you were. What were you like
in high school?
Speaker 3 (08:22):
By the way, you know, I was your classic overachieva.
You know, I have an atype personality, so you know,
I'm that one who's like and I'm a Vago too,
and you know that. I always see these memes like
Virgo is like if you have Virgo in the group,
project Virgo may just be like, you know what, you guys,
you leave it.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
I'm just gonna do this because if you want something done,
you got to do it yourself, Okay.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
Definitely wanting to be in control of results. So I'm
very much like I was always the person who is
just like I gotta do it all I gotta. But
then you know what, I was also a very big procrastinator,
even if you I was a procrastinator.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Yeah, okay, just before I got in here, since you
said virgo, I just have to stop you for a
second because I decided that I was going to put
your birthdate into the big virgo situation, and this is
going to describe you and tell me if I'm right.
This is your birthday, your date, and your year. Okay.
Positive traits Thoughtful and observant. They always notice details at
(09:29):
others smiths. They tend to be perceptive and good listeners. Dependable.
People born on this day often take commitments seriously. If
they say no to something, they usually don't do it.
If they say yes, they'll do it. Intelligent and curious,
ruled by mercury. They enjoy learning, asking questions, and improving
themselves caring through actions. They may not always be gushy,
(09:51):
but they show love by helping, fixing, organizing, and remembering things.
High standards this is so you wait. They strive for
excellence often inspire others to do better, not because they're flashy,
but because they are quietly disciplined strong intuition. Virgos are
known for their logic, but September seventh birthdays often have
(10:12):
an emotional, intelligent and intuition that helps them read people,
and they are loyal beyond belief. Am I hitting you right?
You know what?
Speaker 3 (10:20):
It's so crazy because it's like as much as people
want to say, like, oh, you know astrology, I don't
believe in that, but I don't know if it's like
the older that I get, the more that I'm just like, yeah,
this is spot on.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
But everything that you just said.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Okay, let's wait, okay, hold on, challenges girl, Sorry, there's
this side of the coin. Are we ready ready? Perfectionism,
Their gift for noticing details, can become a burden. Sometimes
they may set impossibly high standards for themselves and others,
overthinking September seventh Virgos can replay conversations, analyze situations endlessly,
(10:58):
and have difficulty turning off their minds. All right, self criticism,
I hope this isn't right. They often extend grace to others,
but can be remarkably hard on themselves, difficulty receiving help.
They like being capable the capable one, and they struggle
to be vulnerable, and they worry. They anticipate problems so well,
(11:19):
they can spend too much time preparing for things that
sometimes never happen. It's true, it's all your things. So
is this you okay? So this girl who we just
described was voted most likely to succeed, is now this
successful actress has had this incredible life in between? What
(11:41):
is the secret? Because I my parents are from Egypt,
so often when I was in a classroom in Morgantown,
West Virginia, I was the one with the funny name.
I was the one with the crazy hair. I was
the one, and so I was constantly trying to fit
in everywhere in all these spaces. Were you one who
tried to fit in? Or were you somebody who kind
(12:02):
of wanted to stand out?
Speaker 3 (12:05):
As a kid, It's so like, all you want to
do is fit in, Do you know what I mean?
You don't want to be the person who's on the outside.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
You know, you crave.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
Belonging, and as humans, you cred that it never goes away.
So I mean, I definitely think that I did try
to fit in in so many ways. But I also
what I did was I relied on my intelligence to
sort of filling the gaps for the places that I
didn't fit in. So it's like I made myself unquestionable
(12:33):
by being the smartest, by being the most on top
of it, by being the best, by being the you know,
like that way, It's like if there were bits that
people wanted to criticize, they couldn't. I'm like, I was
like trying to close all the gaps of anybody trying
to criticize me by just like being the best, being
the smartest, being in charge. That's why I was always
(12:54):
wanting to be like the captain, the leader, the president,
you know what I mean, in some way in a
position of authority.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Oh okay, God, I'm learning. You're so fun to get
to know. I like all of this. Okay, So you're
born in the UK. What was that ten years? What
were those ten years? If you were to not shell
them in a couple of lines, what was that?
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Like?
Speaker 3 (13:18):
I mean, you know, I feel like I definitely very
naive for sure. I don't think I really had an
awareness of some of the different and varied experiences of
the world because also I was from a small town,
you know, a little village outside of Petersborough called Coats.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
I remember always, you know, it was a very simple life.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
I lived right around the corner from my primary school,
you know, like I could just walk there in two
minutes and then, like you know, we've had me say before,
like you know, we were the only black family our
village and black children at our school. So you know,
for me, there was always like a longing for a
(14:09):
black community that was like outside of just.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Like my family helps you. A little girl, by the way,
she's so good. She's what is she six?
Speaker 2 (14:20):
She's six? Now?
Speaker 1 (14:22):
Is she bossy?
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Is she bossy? Is water wet? And she says, I'm bossy?
Do you know what It's like? Here's the thing.
Speaker 3 (14:30):
Okay, So because I guess I am bossy, and so
is my mother who is living us and helping me
raise my daughter. So she's got these two bossy, fiery
women who are looking after her, and she is just
like the amalgamation.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
Of woves energies. Wow, it's open again.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
I'm always referring to her meme again. But I remember
one time to see this meme and it was like me,
me trying to cut my daughter out for having the
same attitude.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
That I have. That's hilarious.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
Do you want to get mad at them? But it's
like she's literally just cause my same attitude.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
It's like I love it.
Speaker 2 (15:15):
I love it, you know, And it's like, but you know,
I don't.
Speaker 3 (15:17):
I really don't get mad at it because I'm just like,
you know, it's my job to you know, to nurture
and guide that energy.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
But I also I want to flourish, you know what
I mean?
Speaker 1 (15:27):
I want to do You're so right? What's harder being
an actor and doing all the things that acting as
you do or being a mom.
Speaker 3 (15:37):
Of course, first of all, just even the entrance into
motherhood is like not for the faint of heart, you
know what I mean, It's like.
Speaker 2 (15:50):
You literally become a whole new person. Yeah, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 3 (15:52):
I I lean on what I've learned in motherhood from
my work, and it's made me stronger. It makes me
strong being a stronger as an artist, do you know
what i mean? Like the motherhood informs it all. And
then also it's like, you know, there's just no heartache
and disappointment like the ones that you experience in motherhood,
Like it is so hard to be split between what
(16:17):
you want to do for and with your children and
having you got like you know what I mean, It's
like how do I even.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
Leave the house sometimes? I don't know. It takes such strength,
do you know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (16:29):
But it's also just like beyond that as a physical process,
there's emotional processes, a spiritual process.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
It's like there's nothing.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
All of it. I like it all right, I'm going
to take you back again. So you're you're in the UK.
You were describing your life there and then your parents split.
Your Mom's like, we're going to Maryland. Okay, So Maryland
is the opposite of the UK. So what was again
another repotting pulling you up by the roots? You're dangling
in the air or where we go on, mom and
(16:58):
you land in the soil there? What did how did
you land in that? How did that feel?
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Obviously big culture shark, I mean.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
A level of diversity at least in the community that
I was in that I hadn't experienced yet. But it
was like super mixed that I was in Gaithersburg. It
wasn't like, you know, I wasn't like in DC or
something where it felt like predominantly black, But.
Speaker 2 (17:22):
It was like way more Black people than I.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
What did that feel like?
Speaker 3 (17:27):
I mean, you know, it's only as it was exciting,
and then it was like a freaking lesson in life.
I mean, you know, the Black experience in America is
so unique and the way that it has shaped the
country and the people. You know, I have so much
respect for the Black American community because to survive and
(17:49):
thrive under such circumstances. And not to say that black
peopleople aren't oppressed worldwide and the anti blacknessesn't exist worldwide,
but I just think so interesting in America, where they
don't have like a cultural touch point right of which
they're in the majority, that they can sort of have
(18:09):
ownership of their living in a country that they built
that is also denying them any ownership to that or
any belonging to that.
Speaker 2 (18:21):
And you know, all of the systems are.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
In try, all the systems are created so as to
not let them be able to succeed, and it's just
like it's so insane that yet and still so influential,
so beautiful, so powerful and managing to thrive and survive,
you know. So it was definitely, you know, it's it
(18:47):
was definitely was It was heartbreaking it was. It was overwhelming,
it was exciting. You know, it was a lesson, a
lesson in black.
Speaker 1 (18:58):
I mean, you are so all. You speak your heart.
You're a straight shooter. You don't try to mince words.
You say exactly what's on your heart, which is such
an awesome trait. And with that kind of trait, when
you were thinking about what you wanted to do with
your life, what was the first kind of career choice
that came to you.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
I mean I was thought I was going to be
a lawyer.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
Ah, that makes sense. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
Also, because my mom loves to tell the story whenever
I would like, if my mom told me no for something,
I would literally come back with like a dissertation of
the reasons of why I was going to put together
a convincing argument. And I mean this extended all the
way through my schooling. Like my teachers used to call
home to be like, can you please speak to your
(19:46):
daughter about why it's okay for her to receive X Y.
I said grade, because I'm like, if somebody gave me
a grade that I didn't think that was the grade
that I had earned, You're gonna have to do I'm
gonna have to debate the book about why this is
the grade that I should get.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Okay, did your mom encourage your behavior? Did she try
to say, honey, you got to listen to the teacher. Oh, yeah,
that's why you're believed in me.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
And she trusted in the wagon.
Speaker 3 (20:09):
She knew listen. She She's like, I've known her from
the womb. I already know this girl. She's coming with
this dissertation. That's why she deserved that grade. She deserved
that grade.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
So you're it's a law school, you're thinking about being
a lawyer, and then you obviously didn't go down that path.
What what took you on another path? Why why did
you end up in this industry? Well?
Speaker 2 (20:32):
A multitude of reasons in a way.
Speaker 3 (20:34):
Right, It's like there's so many I think sliding doors
moments in everyone's life that lead them to something.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Right.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
So the first thing was, you know, so when I
went I thought it was going to be a lawyer.
And obviously my intention was to be a way that
makes a lot of money. But I think all layers
make a lot of money. Personally, I've paid lawyers a
lot of money. But so I was like, I'm going
to be a corporate lawyer and so I went to
university and studied finance with an English Lit minor, and
(21:05):
I just I hated it, and I think it was
also it was just more than just that, Like you know,
it was I had had, you know, at the school
that I wanted to go to.
Speaker 2 (21:16):
We couldn't afford to send me there, and I was
carrying that heartbreak.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
And I just was like, you know, and I didn't
really love like where I was, And you know, I
was also going through my own just changes, seasonal changes
of like coming to terms with who I was as
a person and who I belt about that and who
I wanted to be like as a human being, and
(21:41):
how I sort of felt that I had been. I
had spent all my years since I came to America
sort of performing for people in order to survive being
what was expected of me or what I needed to
be in order to not be questioned or teased or
an outcast. And I by the time I got to university,
(22:04):
I kind of realized all this stuff I've been doing,
Like I don't this person that I've created, I don't
know who this person is or like this person, and
I want to find out who I am and live
as that person was.
Speaker 1 (22:21):
Making money super important, well, of course, okay, just checking
people were motivated, I know.
Speaker 3 (22:27):
But you know what I mean, I feel like it's
a key immigrant motivator and it's this America. You know,
this is you know, if there's one country the word
capitalism is truly singing and doing its thing, it's this
one because there's literally there's relatively no caste system apathetic
books because unlike in other places, I mean, people always
ask me do I have family in Jamaica, and I'm
(22:49):
always like, I really don't have any immediate family lift
in Jamaica.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
Because my family was poor.
Speaker 3 (22:53):
And if you had any hopes of doing anything, making
it in your life and not ending up with nothing,
you had to get out of Jamaica because there's no
it's very difficult to be born poor and become wealthy,
as opposed to in this country, where it's like you know,
that's the whole idea of the American.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
Dream, like you could be born a pope and become
a prince. You know.
Speaker 3 (23:12):
So this idea of success financial success is very motivating
I think for any immigrant and many person living in
the country you know this is India that like I
could you know, I could be successful.
Speaker 1 (23:26):
This is interesting. What you're saying is super interesting because
you're right. All those things are right. And I have
a question for you, since this podcast is called joy
one oh one, if you were to swallow a truth
pill and think about your relatives in Jamaica who are
living the life that they were living and I don't
know if you would describe it. I don't know what
that was, but I'm wondering because there's there are a
(23:48):
lot of studies that say if you make I don't
know a certain amount of money, you're happy. If you
make less, you're definitely unhappy, and if you make more,
you're unhappy. If you make enough enough to provide and
take care of and you know, do all the things
you want, you're you're at your happiest and everything else
is going to throw you. Do you think the most
joyful people you know are the ones who've made it
(24:14):
in terms of my family or yeah, or in general?
And you could you could use your family as an example,
or you could just use in general because you know
so many people probably in both worlds, like we all do.
But who's the most joyful of those groups?
Speaker 2 (24:31):
You know? It's like yes, and know.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
Do I think that the most trouble people are the
ones that made it. I think that obviously. I mean,
and you know, mo money, more problems, as they say,
But you know, like right now, like in my family,
like I'm sort of the person who has achieved design
and I've lived success and that has enabled me to
(24:58):
look after my family, and so in so many ways,
it's like I feel so much joy because I can
do that, and I'm I can you know what, success.
The independence that success has afforded me is incredible and
(25:19):
brings me so much joy. And the fact that I
can look after the people because I.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
Love brings me so much joy when I look.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
At the world and I look at I mean, I
know so many very successful people, and I got to
say joy is.
Speaker 2 (25:34):
Not in abundance among them. But I also think it's
because that's the trap, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (25:40):
It's like a part of this idea of success is
centered around having things, and things do not bring joy,
you know. So I find that the most joyful people
are the ones who are surrounded by the ones that
they love. Because when you're surrounded by your family and
(26:00):
not just buy things, I find that that tends to
bring more joy. But I also just find in general
that Jamaicans tend to be the most joyful.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
People that I kidding my family, yes, you know, but.
Speaker 3 (26:15):
It's like, you know, the trap is that like success
is going to bring you happiness, but then what happens
is you you you, you know, there's so many who
have left Jamaica to come you know, abroad, to come
afar and as they say, and end upon a hamster
wheel of just working and working and working until you die,
(26:37):
and there's no real joy in that, you know what
I mean.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
I know a lot of people who.
Speaker 3 (26:43):
Their aim is to get back to Jamaica because with
the success that they've made, that with whatever small amount
of success that they've had abroad in Jamaica, they can
live a happy life because they have enough to live
off the land and to enjoy the land and to
enjoy what is much more a lot more easy to
(27:06):
deal with and live with and live inside of. I mean,
just being in that on that island brings me joy
and it's like it's a lot more I mean, the's
the reason why it's saying is a Jamaica nice? It
really is nice, and it's much nicer than being on
the Hamster Wheel in America.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
I mean, I try to get this.
Speaker 3 (27:23):
I'm there at least once a year because I'm like,
and when I'm there, everyone's like, oh, do you want this?
Speaker 2 (27:28):
I'm like, I don't want to do nothing.
Speaker 3 (27:31):
And drink jelly water and go into this into and
touch the water, the ocean, the sea, and just give thanks.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
You know, you said a word there that jumped out
at me, and the word was enough. I think it's
sort of like when's enough. What's enough, whether it's success
or whether it's money, or whether it's fame, or whether
it's and it's sort of like for many people, I
think it's the itch they can't scratch because there's always
something else. And you can call it ambition, which it is.
(28:01):
I think ambition is great, but you also wonder about,
you know, like the motivation part of it, because if
you genuinely are happy when you open your eyes when
nothing's happened, Like for me, it's like, I don't have
an interview that day, I'm not nothing huge as I'm
not going to the Olympics that day. Nothing's happening. I'm
(28:24):
just waking up. My kids are in room one and
right here they're seven and nine. There they are in
their rooms. I've got I'm going to go for I'm
going to have a t go for a walk. Like,
if you have that piece of it, I feel like
you've cracked the nut. Because I have friends who are like,
what about the next You put a book out? When's
your next one? How many times have you had a
(28:45):
roll and they said, Jody, what are you doing next?
You're like, I just got this. I don't know what
I'm doing next, But everyone wants to know. You have
a kid, When's you're next? That's what everyone wants to
know about what's next. How do you stay yourself sort
of in the present where you're not always thinking about
the next role, the next audition, the next whatever.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
Gratitude, Yeah, because as I'm giving thanks for what is
here and what has shown up for me, then I
am staying present, you know, and I think that for me,
it's the most important step in the process. You know,
the finish line is always going to move because we
(29:29):
expand and we grow and we change. You know, what
I want wanted yesterday or last year is going to
evolve this year and today, right because I'm not the
same person I was yesterday. And last year, and every
time that I expand the tent, I need more things
to keep the tent running. But you know, I had
(29:53):
somebody tell me a long long time ago when I
first started, and I was in that conversation, you know,
like the he asked me how I was doing. I
was like, you know what, I'm doing well, but I
want you know and he was like, the finish line
is always going to move.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
You have to learn how to be in gratitude for
this moment. And you know, I take that very.
Speaker 3 (30:13):
Seriously because I also think being in gratitude is also
when you are thanking God, you're also acknowledging the blessing
and inviting more.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Hmm. I love that.
Speaker 3 (30:27):
So I'm always like, yes, thank you more of it,
or please my three part mantra by the way, I
say that.
Speaker 1 (30:38):
Again, Yes, thank you, thank you more of this.
Speaker 3 (30:43):
That is my that is my prayer always. I am
always saying yes to what has shown up for me
because I'm not trying to say no to go.
Speaker 1 (30:51):
It's so funny how doors open for you in weird ways.
I mean the fact that Pharrell Williams saw you out
one day and you were telling him about your life
plans and he's like, no, no, you should be an
actress or a model. I personally think whether or not
you ran into Pharrell Williams on that crazy night, you
would have still been exactly where you are, because you're fantastic. However,
(31:13):
it was nice to have someone on the outside looking
and say, wow, did you ever see yourself the way
Pharrell described you? You know?
Speaker 2 (31:24):
Not really? You know?
Speaker 3 (31:25):
And so for me that moment was because it's like
you know, and everybody always references that moment, which was
a pivotal moment in my life.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
But it was pivotal not.
Speaker 3 (31:36):
Because of what it changed for me in a like
exact like way, but what it changed to me, like
in a spiritual way, because for me, I just felt
like if a complete stranger can have this sort of
enthusiasm and certainty about what they see for me, and
(32:01):
why can I not take a chance on myself and
believe in myself?
Speaker 2 (32:05):
You know?
Speaker 3 (32:06):
I really I think I've always, even without knowing how
to totally identify it, felt like it is important for
me to be the strongest believer in myself. And he
inspired me to believe in myself, you know, And that
shifted everything because at the end of the day. There
was a lot of ground between that moment and this one,
and in that ground I had to do a lot
(32:29):
of work, and if I didn't do the work, I
wouldn't be here, you know. But it motivated me to
want to strive and to do it. I was like,
I mean, because it was his enthusiasm was so contagious
and inspiring, and it is for that which I am
tonally grateful.
Speaker 1 (32:48):
Well, it's funny. People are like Jodie turnersmith Man, She's
like an overnight sensation. She just popped out of nowhere.
You're like, I have been grinding. Hello, what didn't people see?
You know?
Speaker 3 (33:03):
I feel like everybody who really knows me knows how
hot I've worked, you know, I, as I said from
the I've always been to show your work kind of good, right.
But I think people who don't know me and who
are just meeting me and who have sort of or
(33:25):
started to meet me at these moments that I you know,
what they didn't see was.
Speaker 2 (33:32):
How much.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
I approach everything as somebody who is here to learn
and thus is not afraid to work, Like I don't
walk into anything as like I'm an expert, Like I
got this. I walk into everything like I am Bambi.
The world is my oyster.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
I'm here to learn. I'm ready to learn. I'm so
open to all of the knowledge and I want it all.
You know.
Speaker 3 (34:00):
Of course people don't see all the tears and all
the hours and all the you know you were talking
about earlier, the negative side of things. I mean, so
much self doubt that I have that I've done so
much work on. Like, that's another thing that I do
a lot of work on, you know, just a constant
(34:21):
process of just like really not allowing the inner critic
to let me be paralyzed, right, because that is something
that is I can be sometimes I can get paralyzed
because I'm just I want to come up with.
Speaker 2 (34:38):
The best plan, but I don't know what that is.
And it's like instead of just.
Speaker 3 (34:43):
Being in the flow and just not being afraid to,
you know, roll up my sleeves and just try and
be embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (34:53):
Yeah, it's so funny the number of people who talk
about imposter syndrome. I don't know if that's what you're
hitting on, but I interviewed to Audra McDonald, who's won
I think five tonys, who two counts anyway she goes,
you know, I have imposter syndrome. I was, I asked he,
I said, how many tonies do you need before you
stop having that? Like these are Jodie Foster like some
(35:14):
of these kind of older actors and actresses, And it
goes all the way to now, these are people who
are established, who we've applauded, who've received the highest accolades.
Still somehow feel inside, huh, I wonder if I'm enough here.
Speaker 3 (35:28):
Because there's no amount of outer affirmation, acknowledgment, hardware in
terms of awards that can quiet the inner critic. And
that's why the work is in the self. Love is
in the you really believing in you, you know, because
(35:49):
all that ends up happening is it's just like the
pursuit of success and money, you are constantly going to
be there will never be enough that will fill the hole.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
You know, there will never be enough. It's you.
Speaker 3 (36:01):
You got to love you, You got to show up
for you, you gotta and so you know, it's I mean,
it's difficult, but for me it's like and you're you know,
and you're always going to feel like that was dumb,
that was stupid, Like it's not good, you know, And
and there's always going to be people, especially now social media,
who are going to comment sate that was.
Speaker 2 (36:18):
Dumb, that was stupid, that's not good.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
So what do you do with that?
Speaker 2 (36:22):
How do you feel about yourself? What do you so?
Speaker 1 (36:25):
Give me something practical, because I was imagining listening to
this as I'm driving my car saying, yeah, I feel
those things. Because it doesn't matter where you get your
critic where the criticism comes from. You could be famous,
or you could be just someone in your community and
seeing that someone has said something or someone on social
media mentioned something about it, how do you process? Like,
what do you do? What's your fit? What do you
(36:46):
actually do? You know?
Speaker 3 (36:50):
Something that I have been trying to do, definitely within
the last five years, six years is disconnect from commentary.
That's helpful because the commentary ends up being really poisonous
it's not actually helpful, you know, And just really work
on myself. I'm reading the books, I'm doing the I'm
(37:10):
not a big meditator, I'm not kind quiet the mind
long enough, but.
Speaker 2 (37:17):
Self care is one way that for me.
Speaker 3 (37:20):
I'm like, you know, I think sometimes we can't always
intellectualize our way through things. Sometimes we just need to
let our physical body lead it. And even the smallest
things an act of self love can support you in
having mental self love. And so I just and I'm
very careful about my language, how I talk about myself
(37:43):
and how I talk about others, you know, that supports
it too, you know. And I stay positive towards other people,
you know, And it's like for me, I'm like, if
I keep my mental space in the light, it will
support me in pushing out the darkness.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
And also just like really doing what I can.
Speaker 3 (38:06):
You know, I have therapy, you know, to not take
myself so seriously that I get stuck.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
So it's okay to be flawed. Now what am I
going to do about it? Well? How am I learning?
Speaker 1 (38:21):
How am I growing such good lessons?
Speaker 3 (38:24):
Not just for you?
Speaker 1 (38:25):
And those are but I was just thinking about your daughter,
who's six, to even witness that when you said I
worry about how I mean, I pay attention to how
I talk to myself because kids do see, no matter
what it is, if you say you hate your hair,
your kids are going to go oh or oh God,
are these tight? Your kids are going to go oh.
Like you may not even be intentionally saying anything. However,
(38:45):
it is what it looks like to them. So when
raising your your little girl, like, how do you raise
a powerful, strong kid?
Speaker 2 (38:55):
Do you think with intention? Do nothing with intention?
Speaker 3 (39:01):
And you know, thankfully, I think with my personality and
how I am as I said, I've been preparing for
this my whole life.
Speaker 2 (39:10):
So I am one hundred percent.
Speaker 3 (39:12):
You know, I'm paying attention to everything, and I'm being
very mindful about how I speak about myself and how
I speak to her, and how I allow other people
to speak to me and to her or about themselves
in front of her. You know, I'm like I be
on people.
Speaker 2 (39:31):
You know, my mom everybody, She's like, leave me.
Speaker 1 (39:35):
Alone, don't say that.
Speaker 3 (39:39):
Language the super language. And I'm also I'm always going
to be like, here's a suggestion for language.
Speaker 1 (39:45):
I'm not just being like ah, I'm like, mom helped
me out here. What's it like raising your daughter with
your mom? What's that like?
Speaker 2 (39:53):
I'm so lucky.
Speaker 1 (39:54):
Yeah, it's a blessing.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
It's a blessing. And I have like a she mothers
everybody in my village. Do you know what I mean?
My friends, most of my friends talk more to my
mom than.
Speaker 1 (40:08):
They talk to me, why does she give great advice.
Speaker 3 (40:12):
Relationship with their own ladship with her, she just becomes
everybody's mother, you know. And so it's like that's the
kind of moment that I have with me. You know,
she's really helped me. She's on one of those grandma's
who's like, I already raise kids.
Speaker 2 (40:24):
I'm not doing this.
Speaker 3 (40:25):
You know, she's there like having my back, and it's
so inspiring because it inspires me to step up, you know,
because it's so easy, especially with you.
Speaker 2 (40:34):
Know, I'm so busy. I have some much stuff going on.
Speaker 3 (40:36):
But again, thank god, that's happy personally that I have,
because you know, that's always been my way. It's like, yes,
I'm trying to achieve all of these things, but when
I chose to become mother, I chose that with all
of me, and so I am also mothering. I'm not
that mother who's like, you know, I need a break
from my kid. I don't want to do you know
(40:57):
what I mean?
Speaker 2 (40:58):
Is it hard? Is it exhausting?
Speaker 3 (40:59):
Absolute? And sometimes like okay, you know what, let's both
walk away right now and just take a little space
from each other. Of course we're humans, but like I'm
all over it, you know, it's why, It's why I
have my mom instead of having nanny.
Speaker 2 (41:17):
It's like it's kind of hard to have nanny sometimes
because nanny cultures so like they want to raise you.
They used to they raise the kid. Yeah, like I'm
more of a mummy's help but kind of good, and
I have one in my mom.
Speaker 1 (41:28):
Something strange happened to me with not strange, but something
made me uncomfortable. Happen with my kids the other day.
So we were it was the first grade kind of
sleepover with moms and kids. And I'm not with my partner.
He's not with us, but he is. He comes in
visits and everything's great. But they did say to my daughter,
why isn't your dad around? And I remember, I froze.
(41:50):
I did, actually didn't. I hadn't seen that. And she said, well,
my dad, you know, and he's a lovely guy, you know,
all these great things. But he, I said, he lives
some else, but he comes. He's coming for a Father's day.
She was trying to say all these things, and I
asked her after if it made her feel uncomfortable or whatever,
and she kind of brushed it off and said no.
(42:10):
And I just went on with it. So I'm not
going to give her more info than she needs, but
you can feel free to answer it or not. But
is there have you had? How do you handle that
piece of the puzzle because it's actually it's part of
my kids' lives and it's part of your daughter's life too.
Speaker 3 (42:27):
Yeah, you know, it's definitely been one of those things
that is, you know, so I'm a child of divorce myself,
and you know, and so is my ex husband, you know,
and so it's like it's always been important to think about, Okay,
what is the language around which we are going to
talk about this with our daughter because it is her
(42:51):
new reality, you know, and we're learning as well and
not always getting it totally right. But the idea is
always two homes filled with love, you know. And I'm like,
I'm like, you got two houses, girls, That's.
Speaker 1 (43:07):
Why that's that's a nice way to put it. You know.
Speaker 3 (43:12):
It's like it's like it's just you got two houses,
and but you know, it's it's it's one of those things.
It's like it's so, you know, because my daughter was
quite young when when I split with her dad, and
and so it's like it's always you know, for me,
less difficult what I'm what she's experiencing from other people,
(43:33):
and more difficult just navigating the conversation with her.
Speaker 2 (43:37):
That's like, you know, why why is this happening?
Speaker 3 (43:41):
M And it's like you got to walk this line
between obviously being age appropriate and child centered in the
way that you talk about it, but also keeping it
real so that she has an understanding of what this means.
And honestly, my favorite tool in all of this has
been my favorite tool for life books.
Speaker 1 (44:06):
Oh so just seeing yourself in another So many.
Speaker 3 (44:09):
Books about divorce, about what that means, you know, about
what that new world is, about what is what is
supposed to be happening, what's not supposed to be happening?
You know, books have children's books have been helpful as well.
Speaker 1 (44:29):
You know, yeah, that is that That's such a great way.
And I was going to say, like, every family is unique,
and families come in so many ways, and I say
that to my kids all the time. You know, there
are so many different kinds of families. I said, your
mom loves you, your dad loves you, We love you,
you know, And so whether I think I think the
(44:52):
world is just different than it was, and I think
I just try to normalize it too. It's like, this
is how life goes. We're having a beautiful Oh my gosh,
you're going skiing, You're gonna go meet dad. Yay. You know,
everything is everything. I like that two houses full of love.
What brings you the most joy in your life? Right now?
Speaker 2 (45:11):
My daughter.
Speaker 1 (45:13):
It is, you know.
Speaker 3 (45:15):
So she's six now, and you know, it's like it's
so interesting like all the different changes that kids go through,
and at every stage, I feel like someone's like, oh,
this is the best stage.
Speaker 2 (45:26):
This is the best stage.
Speaker 3 (45:27):
But there's something so interesting about five and six where
it's like because my daughter, and you know, everyone also says,
you know, the days are long, but the years are short,
and like, you know, it's it goes so fast. But
I am so enjoying watching her grow because it's like
we just get to hanging out with us is so amazing.
(45:52):
Like she really is my little, tiny best friend. Like
I love some of our conversations that we have. No
she gonna cry, it's just that I'm just like, I'm
so amazed by her.
Speaker 1 (46:07):
What does she say?
Speaker 3 (46:08):
It's just I mean, just even like anything, like any
opinion that she has on something, the questions that she asks,
her little sassy attitude.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
You know, I you know, I made to for her
sixth birthday.
Speaker 3 (46:26):
You know, I threw a big party, but I also
redid her bedroom and she's she says that when she
grows up, she wants to be a jungle girl, and
she's a wild girl. So I decided to design her
room with all of these plants hanging from the ceiling.
(46:47):
And I was like thinking to myself, because she's got
very high ceilings.
Speaker 2 (46:51):
In her room. I was like, how can I design
this so that like the plants are hanging, but like
I can get to them. And I put them all.
Speaker 3 (46:58):
These protractable parts and hangers, and then we had found
together these like disco balls, these mirable planters, and we
had the two of them and she's and it was
this amazing thing where I was like, oh my god,
because she's where her room is in the house. When
the sun is coming down, it's shining in the windows.
And so I then I got this idea, and I
(47:19):
got all these prisons and mirror balls that I also
hung from the ceiling. And she's also got that these
hot air boss and so she's like it's fall plast
and I did this like Ivy Planter, Like I planted
Ivy like on the side. If I just got this
unbelie with like a reading book underneath it, and because
I'm so I'm trailing the high and then she's got
(47:40):
this big vinca plant that's like right in front of
the bed, so like all the.
Speaker 2 (47:45):
Lines hang down in front of her reading nook. And
it's just like when it's magic. How it is.
Speaker 1 (47:52):
By the way, can I just say that it's such
a beautiful wow? Okay, I cannot believe the Agency is.
I can believe that this is. I'm bringing this up
now at this point in the interview because you're so
fascinating on so many levels that all of your roles
are like, oh yeah, that too. But the Agency season two.
Speaker 3 (48:11):
Well, so you know, at the end of season one,
if we didn't know what Samya's fate was going to
be in you can see from some of these trailers
that have come out, Samya is in captivity, which is
such a life changing and I wanted to say a
(48:34):
word that I won't say on this has messed up
situation to be in, you know, And so it's like
there is you know, we're really finding for her like
some season two of the agencies. I feel like season
one was a little bit more of a slow ban, right.
It was like, you know, introducing this kind of world
an idea, and we're like and also people were like,
what's going on with Samya?
Speaker 2 (48:52):
Like fy that kind of thing.
Speaker 3 (48:55):
But season two, I think is like immediately, it's immediately
just like balls to the wall like action that everything
that the stakes have gone from seventy five to one thousand,
and here's Martian Weaving continued to weave this tangled web
(49:18):
so that undo the damage that he has done to
this woman.
Speaker 1 (49:24):
I can't believe how I mean not to mention. I
mean a lot of actors when they play a role
like Samya, they would play the role. But you're like
you you are so immersed in her, I mean from
the language from I mean, did you insist on speaking Arabic?
Was that learning it? Or did you could have just
(49:44):
memorized and gone on.
Speaker 3 (49:46):
But you you know, the funny thing is so in
season one, you know, we had some scenes in Arabic
and then you know, we were like the actors as
we were like, it doesn't make sense that this scene
would be in English.
Speaker 2 (50:02):
Like if we're if I'm doing a scene and it's
Samya and Osman.
Speaker 3 (50:06):
And Dalaga, It's like, there's no reason why if it's
just us and we're alone, we would be speaking. So
we were actually like always pushing from scenes in all
in Arabic because we felt like that would be authentic
and we really wanted to. You know, I think this
is for me, this is the first time I've watched
on a show where they really are investing in us
(50:30):
being able to authentically as authentically as possible play these characters.
You know, I've done so many roles where I was
meant to have an accent or speaking of the language,
and it was on me to find a dialect coach
or somebody so that this could be done well, you know,
and I mean we have.
Speaker 2 (50:47):
You know, we've got an incredible Arabic.
Speaker 3 (50:50):
Scholar actually, kalent Abnama, who not only works with me
doing Arabic Arabic lessons, but then we do our sessions
as well, obviously for the scenes and the scene work,
and then he's on set with us, but we are
you know, It's as I've said, I've never been afraid
(51:11):
of working hard, and I love this show.
Speaker 2 (51:14):
I love this character.
Speaker 3 (51:15):
You know, this journey that she's on is so intense
and heartbreaking, not just because like how far she's fallen.
Speaker 2 (51:25):
I mean, she's an intellect and she has fallen so
low because she chose to love the wrong man and
woman is not always okay, so sad about that, you
know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (51:38):
Okay, I need to correct something you said in the beginning.
You said, quote, I'm a procrastinator. That's what you said. Okay,
First of all, I'm going to tell you that's not true,
because after everything I've heard during this discussion, there's no
way on God's green earth that you could have gone
from where you were to where you are without doing
exactly what you said you do, which is you write
(51:59):
it down. You have your list. Where's your notepad? Que
the notepad? Again? I mean, this is what you do.
So I maybe you describe yourself that way, but of
all the things to take off the list, I'm going
to ask you to scratch that one because that is
not you at all.
Speaker 3 (52:14):
I don't hear way, but but I definitely I pick
my moments definitely. And the thing is, I'm just such
a hard worker.
Speaker 1 (52:22):
Yes, and you can't be both. You can't be a
procrastinate and a hard worker. Sorry, if you're playing candy crush.
Speaker 2 (52:29):
And then I just don't sleep to get all the
work done.
Speaker 1 (52:31):
All right, all right, girl, Well look let me tell
you something. I'm not going to ask you what you're
going to do next, because I want to be right
where we are. So I want to say thank you.
You're an awesome interview. Thanks for coming on the podcast. Honey,
thank you, thank you. All right, love to your sweet daughter.
You got it, Take care. Okay. Jody is awesome, and
(52:52):
I also like just her depth of thinking she's got.
She just has a good handle on things. I think,
you know, a lot of times when people have been
to Hollywood and done all these great things, their perspective changes.
She just seems like sort of girl next door, someone
who you'd want to good hang with, someone who is
(53:14):
trying to improve herself all the time. I just I
think she's got all the beats, and I just love
her take on life. I hope you guys did too. Okay,
you know, I love myself. A poem. Here's one, and
this kind of reminded me of Jody. It's called The
Little Things you know, life isn't about all the Emmys,
the Grammys, the whatever. It's about stuff that happens on normal,
(53:36):
everyday bits and pieces. So here we go, the little things.
The little things carry you a glance that lingers, a smile,
like sunlight spilling through the curtains, a text that said,
I heard a song that reminded me of you. When
the night feels endless and stillness sinks into your bones,
even a whisper of light can hold you, even a
(53:59):
tiny can remind you that you're alive. It's always been
the small gestures, the soft ones, the fleeting ones that
echo the loudest. The little things are not little. They
are everything that poems entitled the little Things. Thanks for listening, guys,
Hey guys, Well, summer is here, and you know, I'm
going to try to do every summer because I feel
like during the regular year, we're sprinting. I'm missing things,
We're racing through things, We're getting to the next thing.
I mean, I even think about it when I'm getting
my kids ready for school. It's like, get your shoes,
(00:31):
get your shoes, let's go, let's go. I feel like
we're always in motion and in fast, crazy, fast paced.
So let's talk about what happens when we slow it down.
Don't have to be summertime to slow down, but just
to slow it down. Because what's weird is I think
when we slow our days down, and we can do
(00:52):
it intentionally, like it feels like there's more time in
the day, it feels like there's more room to flush
it out. It feels like everything slows down. And so
when summer comes, since we don't have all the deadlines,
it's the idea of taking it slow. Like what I
like to do on a summer day is have one
(01:13):
mini plan during the day, whether it's go to the
pool or do something. The rest of the day, I
feel like it should breathe. And I've noticed something about myself,
and I don't know if you guys have this. When
I'm rushing, my kids hardly say anything because they're always
being rushed. We don't have any kind of conversations that
(01:33):
are any good. The best convos I find come either
late at night when you're putting your child down. At night,
when you're putting your child down and there's nowhere to
go except to sleep, when I'm driving, because they're not
staring at me, and they for some reason, they just
start talking it all out, and when I'm in slow motion.
(01:53):
So here's an example of one of my daughters. So
we were in the bathroom and she was using the
bathroom when were reading a book together. She's seven and
so she so I was sitting there and I thought,
let me just ask her this question. I said, so, honey,
my daughter has type one diabetes. She was diagnosed when
(02:16):
she was almost five. And so I said, can I
ask you a question? I said, what's it like to
have diabetes? Because I never really asked her that, you know,
and anyone who's got a child or knows someone with
diabetes knows there's a lot of insulin and shots and
monitoring and you know, all that stuff. And she said, well,
(02:38):
sometimes it feels kind of unfair because all the other
kids get cupcakes and I don't sometimes and kids are
always asking me, like what is that thing on your arm?
And sometimes my legs feel wobbly. And she was just
going through all the things that come with being a
little kid with diabetes. Yes, and I was listening so
(03:03):
and she said so, but I guess that's life, right, mom,
something like that. And I said, yeah, honey, And she said, well,
what's it like for you to have me? I said, oh,
my God, like it's one of the greatest blessings of
my life to have you. I said, I'm learning so
much from you, and I'm watching your resilience and you know,
and I'm talking on and on and she blurts out
(03:24):
in the middle the middle of it, like wipe me, mom,
or something like that. But the point is is like
that conversation would not have come had I not slowed down,
if I'd been racing like I do. To hurry up
and brush your teeth and wipe yourself and move on
and let's go and in the car, put on your seatbelt.
(03:45):
You know, all the things I would have missed it.
And so my summer intention is to slow down, is
to have real conversations that are rich and full and beautiful,
and they're all around us, and I think sometimes we
miss them because we're too busy getting to the next thing.
(04:06):
I remember Maria Shriver told me the story once that
she had a million things to do and she was
talking to her friend on the phone. She was in
the car, friend was on speaker and she's like, I'm late.
I have to go here, and I have to go there.
And she said, Marie, where are you going? But he goes,
I'm going to this place, and I'm going to that place,
and then I'm going to this place. And she said, Maria,
where are you going? And she realized she didn't know
(04:31):
where she was going. She was, you know, just going
fast to nowhere. So anyway, this is a long way
of saying, slow down, summer, and let's slow it all down.
Which brings me to my next guest. Okay, she's got
(04:51):
a three namer, Jody Turner Smith. So Jody is such
a fascinating person. Okay. She is from Jamaica. Originally, her
mom's from Jamaica. She was born in England and she
lived there for ten years then she moved to the States.
This is a person who has such crazy tenacity, such
(05:13):
a student and became an actress. I mean, you probably
know her from the Agency, which is an incredible series
where she is like fantastic in this series. You might
know her from some of her earlier work, which is
Queen and Slim. She's played Anne Boleyn And for those
(05:34):
of you who are Swifties, she happens to have been
in a Taylor Swift video. What's fascinating about her is
how she defines joy and how she defines success. Everyone's
kind of got their own trip when it comes to
those kinds of things. Sometimes she needs more and more
and more and more, and maybe you're still not joyful. Well,
(05:55):
I think Jody has sort of cracked that nut. She
understands where her sweets are is. She's got a six
year old daughter, she's acting, and she's living this very
joyful and wonderful life. And she sprinkles her interview with
beautiful life lessons. So I hope you enjoy my conversation
with actress Jody Turner Smith. Oh wait a minute, glam
(06:27):
has hit the zoom listen.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
I did my own glam today.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
Oh you did not That's impossible. I did what's the
wand I want to know what wand was used for
that that hair because that took work.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
Listen, listen.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
You know what I've been so getting into is doing
those little soft rollers at night.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Come on, you know the ones that like of course
it's like old school.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Is everything, and last night too is my I was
like this big.
Speaker 3 (07:01):
Oh please, you know it reverts when with any kind
of moisture outside, and it was like so big, and
I was like, I remember, it was like it was
like eleven o'clock last night and I was outside and
I was like, why didn't I put on like a
bonnet or something. My hair is going to be so
missed up. I have to do it myself tomorrow. And
then before I went to bed, I was like, you
know what, I was eyeing those furlos and I was like,
(07:24):
let me just.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
Okay, well this is I think you need to do
something on that, because if this is the result of that. Man.
By the way, I always say like I have weather
sensitive hair. Every time I step out in the rain,
it's like I feel like there's incoming fire. I'm like,
my kids know I have a seven year old and
a nine year old when it starts raining, they're like,
let's go. They understand that we got trouble when it's raining.
Speaker 3 (07:47):
Okay, I know, you know what I I've always been
like just shorthair gully, and so it's like for me,
I'm like, oh gosh, you know this just having to be.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
Cognizant of sensitive to the weather. It's like a new thing.
Speaker 1 (08:03):
Yes, but.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
I'm adapted.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Well, okay, it's all making sense now. In high school,
you were most likely to succeed. I understand from this
brief interaction that, of course that's what they voted because
of course that's what you were. What were you like
in high school?
Speaker 3 (08:22):
By the way, you know, I was your classic overachieva.
You know, I have an atype personality, so you know,
I'm that one who's like and I'm a Vago too,
and you know that. I always see these memes like
Virgo is like if you have Virgo in the group,
project Virgo may just be like, you know what, you guys,
you leave it.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
I'm just gonna do this because if you want something done,
you got to do it yourself, Okay.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
Definitely wanting to be in control of results. So I'm
very much like I was always the person who is
just like I gotta do it all I gotta. But
then you know what, I was also a very big procrastinator,
even if you I was a procrastinator.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Yeah, okay, just before I got in here, since you
said virgo, I just have to stop you for a
second because I decided that I was going to put
your birthdate into the big virgo situation, and this is
going to describe you and tell me if I'm right.
This is your birthday, your date, and your year. Okay.
Positive traits Thoughtful and observant. They always notice details at
(09:29):
others smiths. They tend to be perceptive and good listeners. Dependable.
People born on this day often take commitments seriously. If
they say no to something, they usually don't do it.
If they say yes, they'll do it. Intelligent and curious,
ruled by mercury. They enjoy learning, asking questions, and improving
themselves caring through actions. They may not always be gushy,
(09:51):
but they show love by helping, fixing, organizing, and remembering things.
High standards this is so you wait. They strive for
excellence often inspire others to do better, not because they're flashy,
but because they are quietly disciplined strong intuition. Virgos are
known for their logic, but September seventh birthdays often have
(10:12):
an emotional, intelligent and intuition that helps them read people,
and they are loyal beyond belief. Am I hitting you right?
You know what?
Speaker 3 (10:20):
It's so crazy because it's like as much as people
want to say, like, oh, you know astrology, I don't
believe in that, but I don't know if it's like
the older that I get, the more that I'm just like, yeah,
this is spot on.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
But everything that you just said.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Okay, let's wait, okay, hold on, challenges girl, Sorry, there's
this side of the coin. Are we ready ready? Perfectionism,
Their gift for noticing details, can become a burden. Sometimes
they may set impossibly high standards for themselves and others,
overthinking September seventh Virgos can replay conversations, analyze situations endlessly,
(10:58):
and have difficulty turning off their minds. All right, self criticism,
I hope this isn't right. They often extend grace to others,
but can be remarkably hard on themselves, difficulty receiving help.
They like being capable the capable one, and they struggle
to be vulnerable, and they worry. They anticipate problems so well,
(11:19):
they can spend too much time preparing for things that
sometimes never happen. It's true, it's all your things. So
is this you okay? So this girl who we just
described was voted most likely to succeed, is now this
successful actress has had this incredible life in between? What
(11:41):
is the secret? Because I my parents are from Egypt,
so often when I was in a classroom in Morgantown,
West Virginia, I was the one with the funny name.
I was the one with the crazy hair. I was
the one, and so I was constantly trying to fit
in everywhere in all these spaces. Were you one who
tried to fit in? Or were you somebody who kind
(12:02):
of wanted to stand out?
Speaker 3 (12:05):
As a kid, It's so like, all you want to
do is fit in, Do you know what I mean?
You don't want to be the person who's on the outside.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
You know, you crave.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
Belonging, and as humans, you cred that it never goes away.
So I mean, I definitely think that I did try
to fit in in so many ways. But I also
what I did was I relied on my intelligence to
sort of filling the gaps for the places that I
didn't fit in. So it's like I made myself unquestionable
(12:33):
by being the smartest, by being the most on top
of it, by being the best, by being the you know,
like that way, It's like if there were bits that
people wanted to criticize, they couldn't. I'm like, I was
like trying to close all the gaps of anybody trying
to criticize me by just like being the best, being
the smartest, being in charge. That's why I was always
(12:54):
wanting to be like the captain, the leader, the president,
you know what I mean, in some way in a
position of authority.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Oh okay, God, I'm learning. You're so fun to get
to know. I like all of this. Okay, So you're
born in the UK. What was that ten years? What
were those ten years? If you were to not shell
them in a couple of lines, what was that?
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Like?
Speaker 3 (13:18):
I mean, you know, I feel like I definitely very
naive for sure. I don't think I really had an
awareness of some of the different and varied experiences of
the world because also I was from a small town,
you know, a little village outside of Petersborough called Coats.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
I remember always, you know, it was a very simple life.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
I lived right around the corner from my primary school,
you know, like I could just walk there in two
minutes and then, like you know, we've had me say before,
like you know, we were the only black family our
village and black children at our school. So you know,
for me, there was always like a longing for a
(14:09):
black community that was like outside of just.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Like my family helps you. A little girl, by the way,
she's so good. She's what is she six?
Speaker 2 (14:20):
She's six? Now?
Speaker 1 (14:22):
Is she bossy?
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Is she bossy? Is water wet? And she says, I'm bossy?
Do you know what It's like? Here's the thing.
Speaker 3 (14:30):
Okay, So because I guess I am bossy, and so
is my mother who is living us and helping me
raise my daughter. So she's got these two bossy, fiery
women who are looking after her, and she is just
like the amalgamation.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
Of woves energies. Wow, it's open again.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
I'm always referring to her meme again. But I remember
one time to see this meme and it was like me,
me trying to cut my daughter out for having the
same attitude.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
That I have. That's hilarious.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
Do you want to get mad at them? But it's
like she's literally just cause my same attitude.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
It's like I love it.
Speaker 2 (15:15):
I love it, you know, And it's like, but you know,
I don't.
Speaker 3 (15:17):
I really don't get mad at it because I'm just like,
you know, it's my job to you know, to nurture
and guide that energy.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
But I also I want to flourish, you know what
I mean?
Speaker 1 (15:27):
I want to do You're so right? What's harder being
an actor and doing all the things that acting as
you do or being a mom.
Speaker 3 (15:37):
Of course, first of all, just even the entrance into
motherhood is like not for the faint of heart, you
know what I mean, It's like.
Speaker 2 (15:50):
You literally become a whole new person. Yeah, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 3 (15:52):
I I lean on what I've learned in motherhood from
my work, and it's made me stronger. It makes me
strong being a stronger as an artist, do you know
what i mean? Like the motherhood informs it all. And
then also it's like, you know, there's just no heartache
and disappointment like the ones that you experience in motherhood,
Like it is so hard to be split between what
(16:17):
you want to do for and with your children and
having you got like you know what I mean, It's
like how do I even.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
Leave the house sometimes? I don't know. It takes such strength,
do you know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (16:29):
But it's also just like beyond that as a physical process,
there's emotional processes, a spiritual process.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
It's like there's nothing.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
All of it. I like it all right, I'm going
to take you back again. So you're you're in the UK.
You were describing your life there and then your parents split.
Your Mom's like, we're going to Maryland. Okay, So Maryland
is the opposite of the UK. So what was again
another repotting pulling you up by the roots? You're dangling
in the air or where we go on, mom and
(16:58):
you land in the soil there? What did how did
you land in that? How did that feel?
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Obviously big culture shark, I mean.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
A level of diversity at least in the community that
I was in that I hadn't experienced yet. But it
was like super mixed that I was in Gaithersburg. It
wasn't like, you know, I wasn't like in DC or
something where it felt like predominantly black, But.
Speaker 2 (17:22):
It was like way more Black people than I.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
What did that feel like?
Speaker 3 (17:27):
I mean, you know, it's only as it was exciting,
and then it was like a freaking lesson in life.
I mean, you know, the Black experience in America is
so unique and the way that it has shaped the
country and the people. You know, I have so much
respect for the Black American community because to survive and
(17:49):
thrive under such circumstances. And not to say that black
peopleople aren't oppressed worldwide and the anti blacknessesn't exist worldwide,
but I just think so interesting in America, where they
don't have like a cultural touch point right of which
they're in the majority, that they can sort of have
(18:09):
ownership of their living in a country that they built
that is also denying them any ownership to that or
any belonging to that.
Speaker 2 (18:21):
And you know, all of the systems are.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
In try, all the systems are created so as to
not let them be able to succeed, and it's just
like it's so insane that yet and still so influential,
so beautiful, so powerful and managing to thrive and survive,
you know. So it was definitely, you know, it's it
(18:47):
was definitely was It was heartbreaking it was. It was overwhelming,
it was exciting. You know, it was a lesson, a
lesson in black.
Speaker 1 (18:58):
I mean, you are so all. You speak your heart.
You're a straight shooter. You don't try to mince words.
You say exactly what's on your heart, which is such
an awesome trait. And with that kind of trait, when
you were thinking about what you wanted to do with
your life, what was the first kind of career choice
that came to you.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
I mean I was thought I was going to be
a lawyer.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
Ah, that makes sense. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
Also, because my mom loves to tell the story whenever
I would like, if my mom told me no for something,
I would literally come back with like a dissertation of
the reasons of why I was going to put together
a convincing argument. And I mean this extended all the
way through my schooling. Like my teachers used to call
home to be like, can you please speak to your
(19:46):
daughter about why it's okay for her to receive X Y.
I said grade, because I'm like, if somebody gave me
a grade that I didn't think that was the grade
that I had earned, You're gonna have to do I'm
gonna have to debate the book about why this is
the grade that I should get.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Okay, did your mom encourage your behavior? Did she try
to say, honey, you got to listen to the teacher. Oh, yeah,
that's why you're believed in me.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
And she trusted in the wagon.
Speaker 3 (20:09):
She knew listen. She She's like, I've known her from
the womb. I already know this girl. She's coming with
this dissertation. That's why she deserved that grade. She deserved
that grade.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
So you're it's a law school, you're thinking about being
a lawyer, and then you obviously didn't go down that path.
What what took you on another path? Why why did
you end up in this industry? Well?
Speaker 2 (20:32):
A multitude of reasons in a way.
Speaker 3 (20:34):
Right, It's like there's so many I think sliding doors
moments in everyone's life that lead them to something.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Right.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
So the first thing was, you know, so when I
went I thought it was going to be a lawyer.
And obviously my intention was to be a way that
makes a lot of money. But I think all layers
make a lot of money. Personally, I've paid lawyers a
lot of money. But so I was like, I'm going
to be a corporate lawyer and so I went to
university and studied finance with an English Lit minor, and
(21:05):
I just I hated it, and I think it was
also it was just more than just that, Like you know,
it was I had had, you know, at the school
that I wanted to go to.
Speaker 2 (21:16):
We couldn't afford to send me there, and I was
carrying that heartbreak.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
And I just was like, you know, and I didn't
really love like where I was, And you know, I
was also going through my own just changes, seasonal changes
of like coming to terms with who I was as
a person and who I belt about that and who
I wanted to be like as a human being, and
(21:41):
how I sort of felt that I had been. I
had spent all my years since I came to America
sort of performing for people in order to survive being
what was expected of me or what I needed to
be in order to not be questioned or teased or
an outcast. And I by the time I got to university,
(22:04):
I kind of realized all this stuff I've been doing,
Like I don't this person that I've created, I don't
know who this person is or like this person, and
I want to find out who I am and live
as that person was.
Speaker 1 (22:21):
Making money super important, well, of course, okay, just checking
people were motivated, I know.
Speaker 3 (22:27):
But you know what I mean, I feel like it's
a key immigrant motivator and it's this America. You know,
this is you know, if there's one country the word
capitalism is truly singing and doing its thing, it's this
one because there's literally there's relatively no caste system apathetic
books because unlike in other places, I mean, people always
ask me do I have family in Jamaica, and I'm
(22:49):
always like, I really don't have any immediate family lift
in Jamaica.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
Because my family was poor.
Speaker 3 (22:53):
And if you had any hopes of doing anything, making
it in your life and not ending up with nothing,
you had to get out of Jamaica because there's no
it's very difficult to be born poor and become wealthy,
as opposed to in this country, where it's like you know,
that's the whole idea of the American.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
Dream, like you could be born a pope and become
a prince. You know.
Speaker 3 (23:12):
So this idea of success financial success is very motivating
I think for any immigrant and many person living in
the country you know this is India that like I
could you know, I could be successful.
Speaker 1 (23:26):
This is interesting. What you're saying is super interesting because
you're right. All those things are right. And I have
a question for you, since this podcast is called joy
one oh one, if you were to swallow a truth
pill and think about your relatives in Jamaica who are
living the life that they were living and I don't
know if you would describe it. I don't know what
that was, but I'm wondering because there's there are a
(23:48):
lot of studies that say if you make I don't
know a certain amount of money, you're happy. If you
make less, you're definitely unhappy, and if you make more,
you're unhappy. If you make enough enough to provide and
take care of and you know, do all the things
you want, you're you're at your happiest and everything else
is going to throw you. Do you think the most
joyful people you know are the ones who've made it
(24:14):
in terms of my family or yeah, or in general?
And you could you could use your family as an example,
or you could just use in general because you know
so many people probably in both worlds, like we all do.
But who's the most joyful of those groups?
Speaker 2 (24:31):
You know? It's like yes, and know.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
Do I think that the most trouble people are the
ones that made it. I think that obviously. I mean,
and you know, mo money, more problems, as they say,
But you know, like right now, like in my family,
like I'm sort of the person who has achieved design
and I've lived success and that has enabled me to
(24:58):
look after my family, and so in so many ways,
it's like I feel so much joy because I can
do that, and I'm I can you know what, success.
The independence that success has afforded me is incredible and
(25:19):
brings me so much joy. And the fact that I
can look after the people because I.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
Love brings me so much joy when I look.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
At the world and I look at I mean, I
know so many very successful people, and I got to
say joy is.
Speaker 2 (25:34):
Not in abundance among them. But I also think it's
because that's the trap, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (25:40):
It's like a part of this idea of success is
centered around having things, and things do not bring joy,
you know. So I find that the most joyful people
are the ones who are surrounded by the ones that
they love. Because when you're surrounded by your family and
(26:00):
not just buy things, I find that that tends to
bring more joy. But I also just find in general
that Jamaicans tend to be the most joyful.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
People that I kidding my family, yes, you know, but.
Speaker 3 (26:15):
It's like, you know, the trap is that like success
is going to bring you happiness, but then what happens
is you you you, you know, there's so many who
have left Jamaica to come you know, abroad, to come
afar and as they say, and end upon a hamster
wheel of just working and working and working until you die,
(26:37):
and there's no real joy in that, you know what
I mean.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
I know a lot of people who.
Speaker 3 (26:43):
Their aim is to get back to Jamaica because with
the success that they've made, that with whatever small amount
of success that they've had abroad in Jamaica, they can
live a happy life because they have enough to live
off the land and to enjoy the land and to
enjoy what is much more a lot more easy to
(27:06):
deal with and live with and live inside of. I mean,
just being in that on that island brings me joy
and it's like it's a lot more I mean, the's
the reason why it's saying is a Jamaica nice? It
really is nice, and it's much nicer than being on
the Hamster Wheel in America.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
I mean, I try to get this.
Speaker 3 (27:23):
I'm there at least once a year because I'm like,
and when I'm there, everyone's like, oh, do you want this?
Speaker 2 (27:28):
I'm like, I don't want to do nothing.
Speaker 3 (27:31):
And drink jelly water and go into this into and
touch the water, the ocean, the sea, and just give thanks.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
You know, you said a word there that jumped out
at me, and the word was enough. I think it's
sort of like when's enough. What's enough, whether it's success
or whether it's money, or whether it's fame, or whether
it's and it's sort of like for many people, I
think it's the itch they can't scratch because there's always
something else. And you can call it ambition, which it is.
(28:01):
I think ambition is great, but you also wonder about,
you know, like the motivation part of it, because if
you genuinely are happy when you open your eyes when
nothing's happened, Like for me, it's like, I don't have
an interview that day, I'm not nothing huge as I'm
not going to the Olympics that day. Nothing's happening. I'm
(28:24):
just waking up. My kids are in room one and
right here they're seven and nine. There they are in
their rooms. I've got I'm going to go for I'm
going to have a t go for a walk. Like,
if you have that piece of it, I feel like
you've cracked the nut. Because I have friends who are like,
what about the next You put a book out? When's
your next one? How many times have you had a
(28:45):
roll and they said, Jody, what are you doing next?
You're like, I just got this. I don't know what
I'm doing next, But everyone wants to know. You have
a kid, When's you're next? That's what everyone wants to
know about what's next. How do you stay yourself sort
of in the present where you're not always thinking about
the next role, the next audition, the next whatever.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
Gratitude, Yeah, because as I'm giving thanks for what is
here and what has shown up for me, then I
am staying present, you know, and I think that for me,
it's the most important step in the process. You know,
the finish line is always going to move because we
(29:29):
expand and we grow and we change. You know, what
I want wanted yesterday or last year is going to
evolve this year and today, right because I'm not the
same person I was yesterday. And last year, and every
time that I expand the tent, I need more things
to keep the tent running. But you know, I had
(29:53):
somebody tell me a long long time ago when I
first started, and I was in that conversation, you know,
like the he asked me how I was doing. I
was like, you know what, I'm doing well, but I
want you know and he was like, the finish line
is always going to move.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
You have to learn how to be in gratitude for
this moment. And you know, I take that very.
Speaker 3 (30:13):
Seriously because I also think being in gratitude is also
when you are thanking God, you're also acknowledging the blessing
and inviting more.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Hmm. I love that.
Speaker 3 (30:27):
So I'm always like, yes, thank you more of it,
or please my three part mantra by the way, I
say that.
Speaker 1 (30:38):
Again, Yes, thank you, thank you more of this.
Speaker 3 (30:43):
That is my that is my prayer always. I am
always saying yes to what has shown up for me
because I'm not trying to say no to go.
Speaker 1 (30:51):
It's so funny how doors open for you in weird ways.
I mean the fact that Pharrell Williams saw you out
one day and you were telling him about your life
plans and he's like, no, no, you should be an
actress or a model. I personally think whether or not
you ran into Pharrell Williams on that crazy night, you
would have still been exactly where you are, because you're fantastic. However,
(31:13):
it was nice to have someone on the outside looking
and say, wow, did you ever see yourself the way
Pharrell described you? You know?
Speaker 2 (31:24):
Not really? You know?
Speaker 3 (31:25):
And so for me that moment was because it's like
you know, and everybody always references that moment, which was
a pivotal moment in my life.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
But it was pivotal not.
Speaker 3 (31:36):
Because of what it changed for me in a like
exact like way, but what it changed to me, like
in a spiritual way, because for me, I just felt
like if a complete stranger can have this sort of
enthusiasm and certainty about what they see for me, and
(32:01):
why can I not take a chance on myself and
believe in myself?
Speaker 2 (32:05):
You know?
Speaker 3 (32:06):
I really I think I've always, even without knowing how
to totally identify it, felt like it is important for
me to be the strongest believer in myself. And he
inspired me to believe in myself, you know, And that
shifted everything because at the end of the day. There
was a lot of ground between that moment and this one,
and in that ground I had to do a lot
(32:29):
of work, and if I didn't do the work, I
wouldn't be here, you know. But it motivated me to
want to strive and to do it. I was like,
I mean, because it was his enthusiasm was so contagious
and inspiring, and it is for that which I am
tonally grateful.
Speaker 1 (32:48):
Well, it's funny. People are like Jodie turnersmith Man, She's
like an overnight sensation. She just popped out of nowhere.
You're like, I have been grinding. Hello, what didn't people see?
You know?
Speaker 3 (33:03):
I feel like everybody who really knows me knows how
hot I've worked, you know, I, as I said from
the I've always been to show your work kind of good, right.
But I think people who don't know me and who
are just meeting me and who have sort of or
(33:25):
started to meet me at these moments that I you know,
what they didn't see was.
Speaker 2 (33:32):
How much.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
I approach everything as somebody who is here to learn
and thus is not afraid to work, Like I don't
walk into anything as like I'm an expert, Like I
got this. I walk into everything like I am Bambi.
The world is my oyster.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
I'm here to learn. I'm ready to learn. I'm so
open to all of the knowledge and I want it all.
You know.
Speaker 3 (34:00):
Of course people don't see all the tears and all
the hours and all the you know you were talking
about earlier, the negative side of things. I mean, so
much self doubt that I have that I've done so
much work on. Like, that's another thing that I do
a lot of work on, you know, just a constant
(34:21):
process of just like really not allowing the inner critic
to let me be paralyzed, right, because that is something
that is I can be sometimes I can get paralyzed
because I'm just I want to come up with.
Speaker 2 (34:38):
The best plan, but I don't know what that is.
And it's like instead of just.
Speaker 3 (34:43):
Being in the flow and just not being afraid to,
you know, roll up my sleeves and just try and
be embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (34:53):
Yeah, it's so funny the number of people who talk
about imposter syndrome. I don't know if that's what you're
hitting on, but I interviewed to Audra McDonald, who's won
I think five tonys, who two counts anyway she goes,
you know, I have imposter syndrome. I was, I asked he,
I said, how many tonies do you need before you
stop having that? Like these are Jodie Foster like some
(35:14):
of these kind of older actors and actresses, And it
goes all the way to now, these are people who
are established, who we've applauded, who've received the highest accolades.
Still somehow feel inside, huh, I wonder if I'm enough here.
Speaker 3 (35:28):
Because there's no amount of outer affirmation, acknowledgment, hardware in
terms of awards that can quiet the inner critic. And
that's why the work is in the self. Love is
in the you really believing in you, you know, because
(35:49):
all that ends up happening is it's just like the
pursuit of success and money, you are constantly going to
be there will never be enough that will fill the hole.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
You know, there will never be enough. It's you.
Speaker 3 (36:01):
You got to love you, You got to show up
for you, you gotta and so you know, it's I mean,
it's difficult, but for me it's like and you're you know,
and you're always going to feel like that was dumb,
that was stupid, Like it's not good, you know, And
and there's always going to be people, especially now social media,
who are going to comment sate that was.
Speaker 2 (36:18):
Dumb, that was stupid, that's not good.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
So what do you do with that?
Speaker 2 (36:22):
How do you feel about yourself? What do you so?
Speaker 1 (36:25):
Give me something practical, because I was imagining listening to
this as I'm driving my car saying, yeah, I feel
those things. Because it doesn't matter where you get your
critic where the criticism comes from. You could be famous,
or you could be just someone in your community and
seeing that someone has said something or someone on social
media mentioned something about it, how do you process? Like,
what do you do? What's your fit? What do you
(36:46):
actually do? You know?
Speaker 3 (36:50):
Something that I have been trying to do, definitely within
the last five years, six years is disconnect from commentary.
That's helpful because the commentary ends up being really poisonous
it's not actually helpful, you know, And just really work
on myself. I'm reading the books, I'm doing the I'm
(37:10):
not a big meditator, I'm not kind quiet the mind
long enough, but.
Speaker 2 (37:17):
Self care is one way that for me.
Speaker 3 (37:20):
I'm like, you know, I think sometimes we can't always
intellectualize our way through things. Sometimes we just need to
let our physical body lead it. And even the smallest
things an act of self love can support you in
having mental self love. And so I just and I'm
very careful about my language, how I talk about myself
(37:43):
and how I talk about others, you know, that supports
it too, you know. And I stay positive towards other people,
you know, And it's like for me, I'm like, if
I keep my mental space in the light, it will
support me in pushing out the darkness.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
And also just like really doing what I can.
Speaker 3 (38:06):
You know, I have therapy, you know, to not take
myself so seriously that I get stuck.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
So it's okay to be flawed. Now what am I
going to do about it? Well? How am I learning?
Speaker 1 (38:21):
How am I growing such good lessons?
Speaker 3 (38:24):
Not just for you?
Speaker 1 (38:25):
And those are but I was just thinking about your daughter,
who's six, to even witness that when you said I
worry about how I mean, I pay attention to how
I talk to myself because kids do see, no matter
what it is, if you say you hate your hair,
your kids are going to go oh or oh God,
are these tight? Your kids are going to go oh.
Like you may not even be intentionally saying anything. However,
(38:45):
it is what it looks like to them. So when
raising your your little girl, like, how do you raise
a powerful, strong kid?
Speaker 2 (38:55):
Do you think with intention? Do nothing with intention?
Speaker 3 (39:01):
And you know, thankfully, I think with my personality and
how I am as I said, I've been preparing for
this my whole life.
Speaker 2 (39:10):
So I am one hundred percent.
Speaker 3 (39:12):
You know, I'm paying attention to everything, and I'm being
very mindful about how I speak about myself and how
I speak to her, and how I allow other people
to speak to me and to her or about themselves
in front of her. You know, I'm like I be
on people.
Speaker 2 (39:31):
You know, my mom everybody, She's like, leave me.
Speaker 1 (39:35):
Alone, don't say that.
Speaker 3 (39:39):
Language the super language. And I'm also I'm always going
to be like, here's a suggestion for language.
Speaker 1 (39:45):
I'm not just being like ah, I'm like, mom helped
me out here. What's it like raising your daughter with
your mom? What's that like?
Speaker 2 (39:53):
I'm so lucky.
Speaker 1 (39:54):
Yeah, it's a blessing.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
It's a blessing. And I have like a she mothers
everybody in my village. Do you know what I mean?
My friends, most of my friends talk more to my
mom than.
Speaker 1 (40:08):
They talk to me, why does she give great advice.
Speaker 3 (40:12):
Relationship with their own ladship with her, she just becomes
everybody's mother, you know. And so it's like that's the
kind of moment that I have with me. You know,
she's really helped me. She's on one of those grandma's
who's like, I already raise kids.
Speaker 2 (40:24):
I'm not doing this.
Speaker 3 (40:25):
You know, she's there like having my back, and it's
so inspiring because it inspires me to step up, you know,
because it's so easy, especially with you.
Speaker 2 (40:34):
Know, I'm so busy. I have some much stuff going on.
Speaker 3 (40:36):
But again, thank god, that's happy personally that I have,
because you know, that's always been my way. It's like, yes,
I'm trying to achieve all of these things, but when
I chose to become mother, I chose that with all
of me, and so I am also mothering. I'm not
that mother who's like, you know, I need a break
from my kid. I don't want to do you know
(40:57):
what I mean?
Speaker 2 (40:58):
Is it hard? Is it exhausting?
Speaker 3 (40:59):
Absolute? And sometimes like okay, you know what, let's both
walk away right now and just take a little space
from each other. Of course we're humans, but like I'm
all over it, you know, it's why, It's why I
have my mom instead of having nanny.
Speaker 2 (41:17):
It's like it's kind of hard to have nanny sometimes
because nanny cultures so like they want to raise you.
They used to they raise the kid. Yeah, like I'm
more of a mummy's help but kind of good, and
I have one in my mom.
Speaker 1 (41:28):
Something strange happened to me with not strange, but something
made me uncomfortable. Happen with my kids the other day.
So we were it was the first grade kind of
sleepover with moms and kids. And I'm not with my partner.
He's not with us, but he is. He comes in
visits and everything's great. But they did say to my daughter,
why isn't your dad around? And I remember, I froze.
(41:50):
I did, actually didn't. I hadn't seen that. And she said, well,
my dad, you know, and he's a lovely guy, you know,
all these great things. But he, I said, he lives
some else, but he comes. He's coming for a Father's day.
She was trying to say all these things, and I
asked her after if it made her feel uncomfortable or whatever,
and she kind of brushed it off and said no.
(42:10):
And I just went on with it. So I'm not
going to give her more info than she needs, but
you can feel free to answer it or not. But
is there have you had? How do you handle that
piece of the puzzle because it's actually it's part of
my kids' lives and it's part of your daughter's life too.
Speaker 3 (42:27):
Yeah, you know, it's definitely been one of those things
that is, you know, so I'm a child of divorce myself,
and you know, and so is my ex husband, you know,
and so it's like it's always been important to think about, Okay,
what is the language around which we are going to
talk about this with our daughter because it is her
(42:51):
new reality, you know, and we're learning as well and
not always getting it totally right. But the idea is
always two homes filled with love, you know. And I'm like,
I'm like, you got two houses, girls, That's.
Speaker 1 (43:07):
Why that's that's a nice way to put it. You know.
Speaker 3 (43:12):
It's like it's like it's just you got two houses,
and but you know, it's it's it's one of those things.
It's like it's so, you know, because my daughter was
quite young when when I split with her dad, and
and so it's like it's always you know, for me,
less difficult what I'm what she's experiencing from other people,
(43:33):
and more difficult just navigating the conversation with her.
Speaker 2 (43:37):
That's like, you know, why why is this happening?
Speaker 3 (43:41):
M And it's like you got to walk this line
between obviously being age appropriate and child centered in the
way that you talk about it, but also keeping it
real so that she has an understanding of what this means.
And honestly, my favorite tool in all of this has
been my favorite tool for life books.
Speaker 1 (44:06):
Oh so just seeing yourself in another So many.
Speaker 3 (44:09):
Books about divorce, about what that means, you know, about
what that new world is, about what is what is
supposed to be happening, what's not supposed to be happening?
You know, books have children's books have been helpful as well.
Speaker 1 (44:29):
You know, yeah, that is that That's such a great way.
And I was going to say, like, every family is unique,
and families come in so many ways, and I say
that to my kids all the time. You know, there
are so many different kinds of families. I said, your
mom loves you, your dad loves you, We love you,
you know, And so whether I think I think the
(44:52):
world is just different than it was, and I think
I just try to normalize it too. It's like, this
is how life goes. We're having a beautiful Oh my gosh,
you're going skiing, You're gonna go meet dad. Yay. You know,
everything is everything. I like that two houses full of love.
What brings you the most joy in your life? Right now?
Speaker 2 (45:11):
My daughter.
Speaker 1 (45:13):
It is, you know.
Speaker 3 (45:15):
So she's six now, and you know, it's like it's
so interesting like all the different changes that kids go through,
and at every stage, I feel like someone's like, oh,
this is the best stage.
Speaker 2 (45:26):
This is the best stage.
Speaker 3 (45:27):
But there's something so interesting about five and six where
it's like because my daughter, and you know, everyone also says,
you know, the days are long, but the years are short,
and like, you know, it's it goes so fast. But
I am so enjoying watching her grow because it's like
we just get to hanging out with us is so amazing.
(45:52):
Like she really is my little, tiny best friend. Like
I love some of our conversations that we have. No
she gonna cry, it's just that I'm just like, I'm
so amazed by her.
Speaker 1 (46:07):
What does she say?
Speaker 3 (46:08):
It's just I mean, just even like anything, like any
opinion that she has on something, the questions that she asks,
her little sassy attitude.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
You know, I you know, I made to for her
sixth birthday.
Speaker 3 (46:26):
You know, I threw a big party, but I also
redid her bedroom and she's she says that when she
grows up, she wants to be a jungle girl, and
she's a wild girl. So I decided to design her
room with all of these plants hanging from the ceiling.
(46:47):
And I was like thinking to myself, because she's got
very high ceilings.
Speaker 2 (46:51):
In her room. I was like, how can I design
this so that like the plants are hanging, but like
I can get to them. And I put them all.
Speaker 3 (46:58):
These protractable parts and hangers, and then we had found
together these like disco balls, these mirable planters, and we
had the two of them and she's and it was
this amazing thing where I was like, oh my god,
because she's where her room is in the house. When
the sun is coming down, it's shining in the windows.
And so I then I got this idea, and I
(47:19):
got all these prisons and mirror balls that I also
hung from the ceiling. And she's also got that these
hot air boss and so she's like it's fall plast
and I did this like Ivy Planter, Like I planted
Ivy like on the side. If I just got this
unbelie with like a reading book underneath it, and because
I'm so I'm trailing the high and then she's got
(47:40):
this big vinca plant that's like right in front of
the bed, so like all the.
Speaker 2 (47:45):
Lines hang down in front of her reading nook. And
it's just like when it's magic. How it is.
Speaker 1 (47:52):
By the way, can I just say that it's such
a beautiful wow? Okay, I cannot believe the Agency is.
I can believe that this is. I'm bringing this up
now at this point in the interview because you're so
fascinating on so many levels that all of your roles
are like, oh yeah, that too. But the Agency season two.
Speaker 3 (48:11):
Well, so you know, at the end of season one,
if we didn't know what Samya's fate was going to
be in you can see from some of these trailers
that have come out, Samya is in captivity, which is
such a life changing and I wanted to say a
(48:34):
word that I won't say on this has messed up
situation to be in, you know, And so it's like
there is you know, we're really finding for her like
some season two of the agencies. I feel like season
one was a little bit more of a slow ban, right.
It was like, you know, introducing this kind of world
an idea, and we're like and also people were like,
what's going on with Samya?
Speaker 2 (48:52):
Like fy that kind of thing.
Speaker 3 (48:55):
But season two, I think is like immediately, it's immediately
just like balls to the wall like action that everything
that the stakes have gone from seventy five to one thousand,
and here's Martian Weaving continued to weave this tangled web
(49:18):
so that undo the damage that he has done to
this woman.
Speaker 1 (49:24):
I can't believe how I mean not to mention. I
mean a lot of actors when they play a role
like Samya, they would play the role. But you're like
you you are so immersed in her, I mean from
the language from I mean, did you insist on speaking Arabic?
Was that learning it? Or did you could have just
(49:44):
memorized and gone on.
Speaker 3 (49:46):
But you you know, the funny thing is so in
season one, you know, we had some scenes in Arabic
and then you know, we were like the actors as
we were like, it doesn't make sense that this scene
would be in English.
Speaker 2 (50:02):
Like if we're if I'm doing a scene and it's
Samya and Osman.
Speaker 3 (50:06):
And Dalaga, It's like, there's no reason why if it's
just us and we're alone, we would be speaking. So
we were actually like always pushing from scenes in all
in Arabic because we felt like that would be authentic
and we really wanted to. You know, I think this
is for me, this is the first time I've watched
on a show where they really are investing in us
(50:30):
being able to authentically as authentically as possible play these characters.
You know, I've done so many roles where I was
meant to have an accent or speaking of the language,
and it was on me to find a dialect coach
or somebody so that this could be done well, you know,
and I mean we have.
Speaker 2 (50:47):
You know, we've got an incredible Arabic.
Speaker 3 (50:50):
Scholar actually, kalent Abnama, who not only works with me
doing Arabic Arabic lessons, but then we do our sessions
as well, obviously for the scenes and the scene work,
and then he's on set with us, but we are
you know, It's as I've said, I've never been afraid
(51:11):
of working hard, and I love this show.
Speaker 2 (51:14):
I love this character.
Speaker 3 (51:15):
You know, this journey that she's on is so intense
and heartbreaking, not just because like how far she's fallen.
Speaker 2 (51:25):
I mean, she's an intellect and she has fallen so
low because she chose to love the wrong man and
woman is not always okay, so sad about that, you
know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (51:38):
Okay, I need to correct something you said in the beginning.
You said, quote, I'm a procrastinator. That's what you said. Okay,
First of all, I'm going to tell you that's not true,
because after everything I've heard during this discussion, there's no
way on God's green earth that you could have gone
from where you were to where you are without doing
exactly what you said you do, which is you write
(51:59):
it down. You have your list. Where's your notepad? Que
the notepad? Again? I mean, this is what you do.
So I maybe you describe yourself that way, but of
all the things to take off the list, I'm going
to ask you to scratch that one because that is
not you at all.
Speaker 3 (52:14):
I don't hear way, but but I definitely I pick
my moments definitely. And the thing is, I'm just such
a hard worker.
Speaker 1 (52:22):
Yes, and you can't be both. You can't be a
procrastinate and a hard worker. Sorry, if you're playing candy crush.
Speaker 2 (52:29):
And then I just don't sleep to get all the
work done.
Speaker 1 (52:31):
All right, all right, girl, Well look let me tell
you something. I'm not going to ask you what you're
going to do next, because I want to be right
where we are. So I want to say thank you.
You're an awesome interview. Thanks for coming on the podcast. Honey,
thank you, thank you. All right, love to your sweet daughter.
You got it, Take care. Okay. Jody is awesome, and
(52:52):
I also like just her depth of thinking she's got.
She just has a good handle on things. I think,
you know, a lot of times when people have been
to Hollywood and done all these great things, their perspective changes.
She just seems like sort of girl next door, someone
who you'd want to good hang with, someone who is
(53:14):
trying to improve herself all the time. I just I
think she's got all the beats, and I just love
her take on life. I hope you guys did too. Okay,
you know, I love myself. A poem. Here's one, and
this kind of reminded me of Jody. It's called The
Little Things you know, life isn't about all the Emmys,
the Grammys, the whatever. It's about stuff that happens on normal,
(53:36):
everyday bits and pieces. So here we go, the little things.
The little things carry you a glance that lingers, a smile,
like sunlight spilling through the curtains, a text that said,
I heard a song that reminded me of you. When
the night feels endless and stillness sinks into your bones,
even a whisper of light can hold you, even a
(53:59):
tiny can remind you that you're alive. It's always been
the small gestures, the soft ones, the fleeting ones that
echo the loudest. The little things are not little. They
are everything that poems entitled the little Things. Thanks for listening, guys,
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