Joy 101: Olivia Munn

“I cried before going into my double mastectomy, and I cried a week after when I saw myself with the expanders in…That made me nervous thinking about my son…because, you know, a lot of us don't know the day we're going to die, right?” — Olivia Munn

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:11):
Okay, So something kind of strange and a little bit
scary happened in our family. I just spoiler alert, everything's great,
but it was late in the night that I had
to rush my little girl, my seven year old, to
the hospital and we were in the er for several
hours until the morning, and again everything worked out fine.

(00:33):
But something happened during those five hours where for me,
like the world snapped into focus. It was like all
the things that I had been thinking about that day,
or worried about or whatever, they were dissolved. It was
like the only thing I cared about was Hope's got

(00:54):
to be okay. That was it. And so while we
were sitting there with all the beeping and stuff of
the machines, all I could think about was Hope being safe.
And then I thought like, isn't that what we all
want for our kids and ourselves to be safe, to
be loved, to be seen, all those things, And yet
we bog ourselves down with all this ridiculous worry and

(01:15):
silliness and stuff that we think is urgent and on fire,
when really it's not. Nothing really is that urgent, even
though we think it is in the moment. And so
the next morning, I was driving to the gym and
I was playing that Puerto Rico song that's so funny.
I love that song. It's like I don't know Puerto
Rico by sax boyd Billy. Anyway, I was playing it,

(01:38):
and you know when a song's so good, you roll
the windows down. Well, I was rolling the windows down,
and I was thinking about Hope and how happy I
was that she's good, She's back to herself, and the
wind was blowing and I was like, wait, Hope felt
this good last week. And I didn't roll down the
windows and I didn't play sax boyd Billy. I just
went to the gym. So it just reminds us like

(01:58):
there's celebration all the time. We don't have to have
a big scary monster come in for us to say,
oh my god, I better appreciate X, Y and Z,
Like it's all just sitting there waiting for us. So
I think, to me, it's like just to remind ourselves that, uh,
don't wait for the darkness always before you see the
great light that's out there, because it's always there, which

(02:18):
brings you to this guest, y'all. I am super excited
for this guest. Because I have loved her for such
a long time and her life has taken on so
many different forms over the years. I knew her back
when she was day drinking with me and Kathy Lee.
Her name's Olivia Munn. She is an actress, she is

(02:41):
a mother, she is a wife, she's a breast cancer survivor,
and she's so funny. I know she's married to John
Blaney and he's the funny one, but as you'll see
in this conversation, she's actually so funny. She's witty, and
she kind of doesn't care, you know when you're with
someone who doesn't care. But what she's done is she

(03:01):
has a great way of reflecting on her life as
she's gone through things, as she went through motherhood, as
she went through the difficulties that come with motherhood in
spite of all the joy, as she went through falling
in love which happened after she had her baby, falling
in love with her husband, and then she went through
this real scary chapter of breast cancer, and how she

(03:22):
evolved and came out of that, and just how she
sees the world now. I mean, she is somebody who
understands that life's full of bumps and bruises, and she's
an ultimate optimist. I loved our conversation with Olivia Munn
and I hope you will too.

Speaker 2 (03:40):
Okay, so first of all, we both have kids.

Speaker 1 (03:44):
What happened? Okay, So just so everyone gets it, I
met you a long time ago. We filled and co
anchored together. Do you remember that?

Speaker 2 (03:54):
Well? We did. And then also it was back when
I was day drinking with you.

Speaker 1 (03:58):
And by the way, the day drinking that whole season
was like one of my favorite seasons.

Speaker 2 (04:04):
Yeah, and it was Saint Patrick's Day, and oh, I'll
never forget it was. It was the best. I was like,
I'm on national television, a little tipsy, and you were.

Speaker 1 (04:15):
You literally downed one and I remember going like, this
girl is boss.

Speaker 2 (04:20):
Well, when I saw the reaction on you and Kathy's face,
I thought this was a mistake. Probably look at them,
this was not a good decision.

Speaker 1 (04:29):
I cannot believe all the things, all the seasons you've
already had in your life since then. So let's just
talk about first of all, what's life like in a
beautiful home with two beautiful.

Speaker 2 (04:42):
Kids, all the chaos that comes with it. So what's what,
what's joyful? Like in all of that, it's all joyful.
I feel like, you know, I don't think I realized
until honestly, all the stuff that had been going through
the last few years, that that I that I was
missing this much joy. You know, that I that I

(05:05):
could be as soft and vulnerable as I have been.
And you know, we it's we're in it. It's it's
a it's a mess at times, and we love it
like that, and it's really we just we all really
love and like each other. But we like our kids.
We think they're interesting, you know, we you know, we

(05:25):
don't really you know how people always do the whole like,
oh the old ball and Chaine, or oh my kids
are driving me crazy. You don't like, we don't know,
because there are times when were exhausted. But I feel
like people do that a lot. And it's kind of
like we all kind of do because we've heard other
people do. Yeah, the truth is that we were just
mesmerized by those little kids and in our friendship with
each other.

Speaker 1 (05:46):
Let's go back then. So back when I knew you,
did you like secretly have this vision, this idea that
one day the kind of life that you had dreamt
of would be to be with a guy you were
crazy about, to have a couple of kids, to have
that kind of stability. Was that something that was on
the horizon or never, even as a little girl.

Speaker 2 (06:07):
I never was the one who thought about my getting
married or and or like even having kids. I always
love kids, but it just wasn't something on my mind.
I always wanted to get to California and work, work, work.
I mean we first met, I believe when I was thirty.
I just turned their thirty that year and I was
on the Daily Show with John Stewart, I remember, and

(06:28):
I had my first like NBC, like my first real
acting jobs like this NBC Sitcommon. So everything that I
had wanted since I was little was coming to fruition,
and so that was my focus.

Speaker 1 (06:39):
So you want, you wanted to be an actress, So
at what point, because once you get the taste of that,
some people don't want anything else. It's like they get
this itch that they can't scratch, and you your career
really was taken.

Speaker 2 (06:53):
Off, you know. I will say that I've only been
able to as you know, like once you get through
certain things in your life. But I think also age
does this to you where you start to look back,
and I started to understand the decisions I had been
making because career was so important. But I got derailed
a few times with like in relationships that kind of

(07:16):
took me off my course. And and so that's strange
because I was, as I'm answering this question and thinking
about it as you're asking him, like oh, yeah, that
was my focus. But then I, you know, to be
completely honest, like there were things that derailed me. So
I guess at that time that was my focus, my
conscious focus, but subconsciously, I think my brain was also

(07:37):
thinking that I needed to be in a relationship.

Speaker 1 (07:40):
Yeah, what were your relationships like before?

Speaker 2 (07:43):
John, Well, I'm I'm friends with almost all of my
exes almost.

Speaker 1 (07:52):
We'll talk about it.

Speaker 2 (07:54):
But looking back, there just weren't like there there are
certain qualities that that I was missing for them and
that they were missing for me. And what I looked
back on and I think that because of how I
grew up. You know, I was my mom and dad
divorced when I was six months old, and then she
married a man when I was two years old until

(08:14):
I was sixteen years old who wasn't a good guy.
And so I learned a lot about my relationship choices.
Not until I was thirty seven, yeah, and I was
thinking about I'd read something about like a poverty state
of mind, and you know there's like rich poverty and
the poor poverty, and how like billionaires like they can

(08:36):
lose their money and then get it all back, and like,
how does that happen? Because they just believe. And then
I started realizing, like one of my best friends her
mother and father divorced the same as me when she
was young, and then her mom remarried a man was
an amazing father. Because I'd asked her before, like, oh,
do you even miss your She's like, no, her stepdad
was amazing. It was your father. And so as she

(08:58):
went through life, she would be broken up with the guy,
but not even care. It would never face her. She
would never cry. She'd be with somebody for five years.
He cheated on her, and I was like, are you devastated.
She's like, no, I'm moving on. She just had She
had that because she always believed, well, there'll be somebody else.
At the same time, though, the way that her mother
raised her was that money was very scarce, So she's

(09:23):
gone from job to job to job to job because
she hasn't really figured out how to love what she
does for work, right, because her truthle was right. Yeah,
so she I say she had a financial poverty mindset,
but a rich relationship mindset, and then you switch mine around.
So I had a father who left and a horrible stepfather.

(09:45):
So my relationship idea was a relationship poverty mindset. But
my mom was always like, whatever you want to do,
I'll figure out a way to get money. We were,
you know, middle class military family, so it wasn't like
we had tons of money. But my mom was like,
whatever you want to do, like whether it's gymnastics or
cheerleading or anything, We'll figure out the money. So I

(10:06):
had a financial you know, wealth mentality. So I but
the relationship poverty put me into a place of being
in relationships and staying too long because I didn't think
there would be something else.

Speaker 1 (10:18):
Why do you think your mom stayed with him all
those years?

Speaker 2 (10:21):
Well, my mother was an immigrant, right she left. She
left her home country, you know, Vietnam the day the
war ended, and was one of the last boat refugees
out and came to America. And you know, I think
that when you there's a fear that that you don't
belong in this country and that you kind of are

(10:41):
safer when you're with someone with someone, And also she had,
you know, all of my aunts and uncles, my mom's
you know, and my mother, they all have multiple master's degrees.
You know, they've become successful doctors, radiologists, engineers, one work
for NASA, and my mother went that route but then
got married early. And I think especially during that time, right,

(11:02):
you give up everything, and when you become a mother
for so long, the workforce is like why did you
take so much time off? You know, like I wasn't
taking time off work. I was working. I'm a mother, Yeah,
I'm running an entire household. But at that point there
was this feeling like what am I going to go
back to do? But also it's interesting as parents when

(11:24):
I think a lot about my younger self. That's the
way I think has been the best benefit for me
as a parent is that I remember my childhood very
well and I remember not my mom always said to us,
you know, do whatever we can find the money. But
she never said something but I saw it, which was
like I remember thinking what will we do for work
if my mom like if my mom. I would daydream

(11:46):
that my mom would divorce him, but then I would
be like, but what would we do? What would we
do where we'd be homeless because it was because he
worked and we lived in a home that was funded
by the military, so everything was attached to him.

Speaker 1 (11:58):
You know what's interesting about you. I'm just listening to you,
and this is you're someone who's obviously done work on
yourself because the way you're describing looking back reflecting. But
as a little kid, when you're living in that house,
you don't have any of this knowledge. You just see like,
what the hell's going on here?

Speaker 2 (12:16):
You know what I did have was, you know, when
you look back on your younger self. I was told
this by my therapists. They're like, you know you you
think your memories are as an adult, meaning like the
way that you're like, well, I felt that this was
unfair and you can still rationalize that when they said
you could go to the water park and then they
switch plants and all of a sudden we had to
go somewhere else, that that felt unfair and as an

(12:39):
adult and you can say, well, things change and plans change,
and you know, promises have to be broken. Sometimes, but
you still remember that it was unfair. Yeah, And I
remember being I was, I took it in more and
I really I was like, this is not okay, this
is not okay. And I would speak up more and
I would scream more and shout back more and get

(13:00):
punished more.

Speaker 1 (13:01):
What did he do when you did that?

Speaker 2 (13:02):
I mean it, well, first, it's the screaming and we
It was a household where my stepfather hit us a lot,
and so but I learned to take the hits and
I and I and I remember there was one specific
moment that I talked about recently, but it was that

(13:22):
I went for a long time without talking to him.
And at this point, I'm a teenager and I thought,
I'm just kinda talk to him anymore. Yeah, And he
could pick up on that, and eventually one day I
was walking up the stairs and he was walking down
and he and I just wasn't looking at him, and
he grabbed me and he said, I'm sick and tired
of you not look at me when I you know,

(13:44):
And I was like, I look and I looked up
at him and then I rolled my eyes and I
was going to keep walking, and then he like just
smacked me across the side of my head, which then
like hit the wall on the stairs it had all
the family photos, and then I remember broke the glass
and I had a little bit of blood coming down,
and I remember like tears came up my eyes, but
not from being upset emotionally, because just like the pain.

(14:07):
And I remember him looking at me and looking that
like I had tears my eyes, but I still was
like steely, steely, and I just was like and I
rolled my eyes again and kept walking. And I remember
that moment was like was a pivot. It was a
real strong pivot. And then not that long after they divorced.

Speaker 1 (14:23):
Wow. Yeah, And then how did you because again, we
all choose what we grew up with, So how did
you decide, like or did you say I'm not I
mean afterwhiles you say I'm not I'm not having I'm
doing the opposite of what I had.

Speaker 2 (14:37):
What do you mean by we all?

Speaker 1 (14:39):
I feel like most girls look for what they had
growing up, even though you don't know if you want
to choose, we choose the guy. We're like, yeah, like
my dad, my dad was distant. I look and I
think men do that as well, and men do it too.

Speaker 2 (14:54):
And I had learned as well that we repeat patterns
in our life to prove that we're worthy so that
we can find only get to that place where like,
oh see someone like this can love me back, someone
like this saying I'm worthy, And what I realized again
and even though I've done the work, but a lot
of it happened at thirty seven, you know, such a magic. Yeah,

(15:16):
I know. And also it came with also having not
a great therapist who was an amazing person. I know
really care is very successful, but the advice she gave
me was pretty vnerable. And so I realized that, like,
I'm going to keep getting the same lesson in life

(15:36):
until I learn it, so it will keep coming back.
I just need to learn it. And I was about
to kind of go down that same route again and
I recognized it again, and I was like, God, all
this pain I had gone through with the last relationship,
and like the courage it took to get out, that
will all be for nothing if I do this again, Wow,

(15:58):
because it's going to get so I was like, oh no, no, no,
And then that changed my mind because it's it's almost
like it's like working so hard for something like that's
not a relationship, just something I could put my mind
to something else, Like I worked so hard, I got
through all this pain just to throw it away for
something that I almost know is going to end again. Yeah,
and that changed my mind as like, I'm surprised that.

Speaker 1 (16:20):
You let people in like after that, I would think
it would be hard to trust anybody to allow someone
to come into your life, into the sacred parts of
you that you're like, these are tender. I don't know
about you.

Speaker 2 (16:34):
It was hard. Yeah, I don't think that I really
allowed someone into my life until after I had my
first child. Yeah, and at that point, I was forty
when I got pregnant, forty one when I had Malcolm.
But it was because you know, looking at looking at
my son and realizing like, Okay, my job as a

(16:58):
parent is to teach how to climb a mountain, But
how can I help him with the stumbles along the
way if I haven't conquered it myself. So I got
to figure this out so that when.

Speaker 1 (17:10):
I've chills all over just from what you're saying, I'm
just letting you know I.

Speaker 2 (17:13):
Can see them, but it's like I need to do
it and I need to and it is possible. You
just have to do the work.

Speaker 1 (17:20):
Tell me about love because you trusted after Malcolm. So Malcolm,
let's talk about Malcolm for a second. So this was
probably among the most transfer my national moments of your life,
this baby. So the minute Malcolm was placed in your arms,
tell me what when a shift happened? Did it happen then?

(17:42):
Did it take a minute? Like what happened with you
once you had that baby in your arms? Would change it?

Speaker 2 (17:47):
It actually started, the shift started. It didn't fully come
to a beautiful birth in myself until after he was born.
But I remember going like, am I pregnant? Yeah, I
do some math, let me just fink or something out.

(18:08):
And then I remember going to see my doctor and
he was like, yeah, you're pregnant. And he's like, come
back in a couple of days to see if like
it's going to be a successful pregnancy. And then he
and I said, well, what are we looking for? He's like,
we're looking for the numbers to like, I think double
or just increase. I can't remember exactly what the math was,

(18:31):
but when I came back, he was like, it's gone
up four times, and I was like what does that mean?
He goes, it's just immediately a very strong pregnancy, and
when he said that, I just had this feeling like, oh,
this is my baby and this he's supposed to be
here or I didn't know it was a boy at
that time. I was like, this baby's supposed to be here.
And I remember just feeling like just peaceful. In the past,

(18:54):
it was like, oh my god. Like, if you're thinking
about the possibly get pregnant, you're like, I can't do this.
And you know, when you're you're younger, you're like, I
have dreams to pursue, I don't have the money and like,
and at that point in my life, I made all
decisions for myself. If I wanted to travel somewhere, I did.
If I want to take a job, I did. If
I didn't, I didn't. And so those were of course
probably there, but I was it was like, oh, I

(19:17):
this is it.

Speaker 1 (19:18):
So you have this baby. And then after Malcolm, that's
when you finally trusted love.

Speaker 2 (19:25):
I mean yeah, because I saw John with him.

Speaker 1 (19:28):
Yeah, and what did that do.

Speaker 2 (19:29):
I was actually talking about about this the other day
because one of those photos show up on your phone
and I was like, it was a picture of him
holding Malcolm, and then right after that it was a
picture of him because we were told by a friend,
somebody has to stay with the baby because there'll be
doctors and nurses with the mom, but somebody just in
case something happens, just so you can be there and

(19:52):
then make decisions and go. So there's a picture of
my best friend since I was thirteen. She was there
taking all the photos, and there's this picture of him
with his hand on it, just like looking at Malcolm,
and you can tell in that moment his whole heart
burst open, and he said that he was like, oh, oh,
there you are, Like, there's my this is who I've

(20:14):
been looking for and waiting for my whole life, and
he just immediately became a father. But we also came
home and he knew how to use like he knew
that every bottle had different nipple sizes. I didn't know that.

Speaker 1 (20:25):
How did he know?

Speaker 2 (20:26):
He had done all this research. He was like, hey,
I know how to do the swaddle and I was like,
how do you just swall? He was like, well, I've
been practicing on the teddy bears we bought.

Speaker 1 (20:33):
So he was gearing up all the way.

Speaker 2 (20:36):
Which I really needed because I had a horrible postpartum
anxiety that started about a month after he was born.

Speaker 1 (20:44):
So that you had anxiety after which left you in
what kind of a state.

Speaker 2 (20:48):
It's unbelievably difficult. I mean, I've gone through breast cancer
and then helped my mother through breast cancer, and that
was more difficult. And I wish that more people talked
about it and there's more empathy and compassion for women
who go through this. Depression is something that I was
worried about, and I think and there's a lot of
people who understand postpartner depression. I was not prepared for

(21:09):
postpartum anxiety. It was like a month or so after
and all of a sudden, I wake up like four
AM and I just go oh, and I'm gasping for
air and my chest is tight. And it's like that
every day for almost a year. Every day, wake up
before it and my eyes just pop open.

Speaker 1 (21:26):
At four Are you afraid of something or what's happening?

Speaker 2 (21:29):
So at first I didn't have any thoughts about it. It
was just as a physical feeling, which is so then
your brain starts to put thoughts to it. And it
was a really interesting thing that happened, especially talking about
what we were talking about earlier, with my mindset, all
of a sudden started having a poverty mindset, which is
something I've never had. All of a sudden, I'm thinking,

(21:50):
oh my god, I can't pave with the baby. What's
going on. And also at that time, John was on
this massive stadium tour and making so much money, which
is great because we're a family, but my whole life
if I was making my own money.

Speaker 1 (22:02):
And focused on that, and now you weren't.

Speaker 2 (22:04):
And now the money my because I was because we
you know, everything was new, so you know, he paid
for things and I but I would just be the
one buying things, you know, all the time. And I
was like, well, money's going out, but the money's coming in.
And a real interesting thing when you know, when you
hear about this in the news with mothers who are
going through postpartum depression or anxiety, and I think a

(22:26):
lot of it happens with anxiety from what I've been
seeing in the news or at least what I'm seeing lately.
Something something plays a trick on your brain. And I
had reached out to my business manager and I was like,
how much do I have, and when I saw it,
my heart dropped and I freaked out because it was
like less than half of what I had thought and that.

(22:46):
I didn't say anything to John for like a month
or so, and then finally we were talking about something
and I just said, oh. He took me out to dinner.
He said, let's get out, and I was like, okay,
and that's why I go out to dinner with this,
and I'm just like, I felt so horrible just being
out in the world. Was like, why am I out?
I need to be at home feeling anxious and thinking

(23:06):
about this and doing nothing I need. Yeah, And so
I just said it. I was like, I'm feeling all
these things. I don't know what to do, and I
just I'm at a loss. And he was like wait,
he was like, is that that that's what's going on?
I go yes, and he said the next day he
called his business manager. He's like, we're sending her credit card,
all bills go to me. I'm handling everything. And and

(23:28):
that did help, because all of a sudden I was like, okay, well,
but it didn't change everything because my brain was still
thinking about things and I still had what my business
manager said but at least I wasn't money, wasn't going
out anymore. But then a few months later I asked
my business manager, like, can you just give me my
my my total value again? And it was like two

(23:52):
or three times more I can't remember it, say more
than I than he had told me at the beginning.
And I said, wait, what are you? He goes, what
are you talking about? And I went back to the
email and I read, I absorbed it, read it, experienced
it wrong. I read it all wrong.

Speaker 1 (24:08):
So you were freaking out over a number that wasn't
even rest. It was in black and black and white,
but that wasn't what your brain processed.

Speaker 2 (24:14):
And so that's where, like I think the compassionate understanding
for women going through this. Thank god I didn't have
thoughts of self harm or hurting anyone else. And my
heart just breaks for those women and the understanding that
needs to happen for them, because I very much understand it.

Speaker 1 (24:33):
That's so interesting. So talk about like having Malcolm and
just being having that part of your life while this
other thing is kind of brewing inside and you're feeling
all these anxious thoughts. But there you are holding this baby.
What did the best feelings feel like for you during

(24:53):
that or those early days.

Speaker 2 (24:55):
I did feel like it was just so co see.

Speaker 1 (25:00):
Yeah, And.

Speaker 2 (25:03):
I guess the thing that really made me feel so
good was that I even though I was going through
that anxiety, I felt really capable yea. And I was like, Oh,
I can do this, and I know I'm going to
be a good mom and I'm going to figure out
the stuff along the way. And I just it. I
could see how he was such a happy baby, such

(25:24):
an easy baby. I mean, John would just sit there
on the couch with him. My mom was there. My
mom drove me crazy. My mom drove me so crazy.
But she's the best thing ever. John met her like
a few days before we had Malcolm. And so she
comes in and she rolls her suitcase in big suitcase.
She doesn't even say hi to me. She's only seen
me pregnant once before that like earlier in the pregnancy.

(25:47):
And she rolled does hey, how you and then opens
up the suitcase and takes out a frozen butterball turkey
and she is from Oklahoma and I was like, it's butterball.
We have the year at raul on Ventura, Like, what
are you talking about? And then she starts unpacking, like
vegels from my garden. I was like, okay, last time
regard and then she'd be like from Albertson's and You're

(26:08):
like okay, like this special sauce. It was so crazy
and and so how did they click?

Speaker 1 (26:14):
Did they?

Speaker 2 (26:15):
Oh? My, are you kidding me? He is? He is
her best friend. She is his best friend. Like last night,
she's in town and they're watching this Korean movie. And
then John put our son to sleep and fell asleep
with him because very tiring, and it's great to go
to sleep with your son. And I had to wake
him up. And because my mom was like, hey, wake
up John mulaney. She calls him first and last name,

(26:38):
Hey wake up John mulaney. It's time to watch the movie.
I had to finish it. And I was like, well,
he's sleep, people wake him up. So I go in
there and I'm like John, John, He's like startles, like
what I go? You have to go finish the movie.
My mom's waiting, Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I gotta go.
He was in a deep slumber and he was like
I go, you don't have you wan me tell? He's like, no, no,
I gotta watch it.

Speaker 1 (26:55):
We gotta finish it going Oh my god, I can't
believe they clicked. How weird so that your mom saw
you pregnant once shows up with her luggage, just met John.
There's a baby, like all of this dynamic just like
and they clashed.

Speaker 2 (27:09):
So it was a really funny time. When I talk
about my all drive me crazy. So I was trying
to breastfeed. I had very low supply. It took me
forever to fill the bottle. I could maybe give him
one or two feedings a day, and then we had
to do formula the rest of the time. And so
I put it on our big kitchen islands. It was
off to the side of it. You know, it's a

(27:30):
there's a She had like three quarters of it for
her cooking, and I had one little corner. And I
come in and I go, where's the milk I left
on the counter because you have to keep it on
the you make breast one, you have to keep it
on the counter, and you could put it back in
the fridge after surmount of time, but I wanted to
be rimmed up for him. She goes, what milk? I go,
the ones that were right here in the bottle? That

(27:50):
I used for my breast milk, and he was She
was like, oh I threw away I thought it was garbage.
I was so mad lost I was. I lost it.
I was like, I can't believe you. Why would you
do that? I can't believe do you how long it
takes me? I was so I was screaming so much.
I was so upset. And then later she goes up

(28:12):
to John and says, she's really mad at me because
I threw ay the milk and John goes, you three
the milk, goes yeah, but I also noticed something. She
told you to get humidifiers for the house, all the rooms.
You didn't do it, So I'm going to tell her
you do it so she won't be mad at me.
She goes, so you have to know that and don't
let her be mad at me anymore. You have to

(28:33):
accept it. But then John comes up to me and goes,
this is what your mom, This is your mom's plan.
I was like, this little crazy Asian lady, there are
little plots seeming.

Speaker 1 (28:46):
Can you believe how well those two click? I cannot
believe your cute little family.

Speaker 2 (28:52):
You know she you should have seen her, or you
should go back and watch it. She was on steth
Myers with John. She was in the audience watching it.
She went she went to John was on seth and
she went to the audience and they threw through back
to her and it was like her comedic time and
was very good.

Speaker 1 (29:06):
Was she really funny?

Speaker 2 (29:06):
Well yeah, but she was just answering the questions normally,
but she was very good.

Speaker 1 (29:11):
What parenting stuff did you take from her? And which
what did you leave behind from what she showed you.

Speaker 2 (29:17):
You know, I was one of five kids, have two
step siblings who were my siblings from two to sixteen,
and then there was a divorce, and so they have
a different trajectory in life. But my mother had like
physically had my brother and my sister. And my sister
is a partner of her law firm, and my brother
is a physicist who lives in Paris. And yes, I

(29:40):
am the disappointment of the family. If anyone is asking
of my Asian family, they're like, oh, actor. But but
my mom, ever since we were little, she never took
credit for our wings o our ability. You know, she
always she was you know how I've heard some parents,
you know, and especially going up there, like oh you

(30:02):
get that from me or you get that from me.
My mom never did, never did, so I feel like,
you know, she never took credit for our wings, which
is why we all felt we could fly, we could jump,
and we just we did it. We all thought and
anything was possible.

Speaker 1 (30:15):
You have beautiful Malcolm, You have your cute little family
and the butterball turkey and the butt and the luggage
into all of it. And then later on in life
you learn a really scary and terrifying diagnosis. A long
time ago, I was diagnosed with breast cancer, and I
remember it like the moment that the diagnosis came and

(30:38):
I went into panic mode. I went into my life
as a beginning and an end. I haven't done the
things I want to do. I have all these streams,
and I felt afraid in my window. How did how
did it affect you those words? And what was the urgency?
What how did your life.

Speaker 2 (30:54):
Change at that moment? It's like, yeah, it's like a
huge marker and there's a different story that's now being
told and you're in your life like if you know,
when somebody goes back and tells the story of your life,
you know you think it's going to be one way
and all of a sudden, there's a fork in the road.
And in that moment, it was it felt like this

(31:18):
sounds strange, but that's why I bond so much. You know,
you've bond with women who've gone through bast cancer because
we've all had that same moment where we're told the
same thing. And it felt like like seeing a really
big celebrity, like like if I'm seeing Oprah, you know,
because I'd seen this in movies. I've like, oh, I've

(31:39):
seen this when someone sits down they go it's cancer.
You know, you watch it like from a third person perspective.
And then all of a sudden, it's happening to me,
and it was like, oh wait, I've seen this same
scene play out in movie. I mean it's TV shows.
Like it just was like, how did I, like like Truman,
show myself into this, Like this isn't it? Just so

(32:00):
it was very surreal, and as it's happening, my brain
is it feels like I'm like, it feels like I'm
in a movie. But the same time, my brain is
being like, you're not be here right now, be here
right now, And I got really focused. I was like,
she's telling me a lot of stuff because she was
my doctor was like, you have multifocal, multi quadrant breast cancer,

(32:23):
and it's an aggressive, fast moving cancer. So it's so
we have to move fast, and you need to do
a double mastectomy. And I think that it's probably going
to be in your left breast as well, because it's
abnormal to have it this many places in your right right.
And so as she's saying that, my brain is being like,
comes back, come back to here, and she was right.
I had breast cancer my left breast as well. So

(32:45):
then I was diagnosed with multifocal, multi quadrant bilateral hormonal
breast cancer. And then it was off to the races,
and so I just stayed focused. I talked about this
when I talked about my cancer for the first time,
it was that I only cried twice during that I
cried before going into my dolmastectomy, and I cried a

(33:05):
week after when I saw myself with the expanders in.
And you know, my I started. I bled a lot
during my surgery, so what was supposed to be a
three or four hour surgery turned into like a ten
hour surgery, and so there was like going into that
maybe my I just knew how serious it could be,
and so that made me nervous thinking about my son,

(33:27):
thinking about all the things. You're like wow, like cause
I you know, we don't a lot of us don't
know the day we're going to die. Right when my
grandmother died, it was the middle of summer in Oklahoma.
It's a bright, sunny day. Nothing happens bad on a
sunny day. You watch the movies, it's always ominous and
cloudy and dark and thunderstorms. And it was an emergency

(33:51):
call at nine one one the night before taking her
to the hospital. I was the one called nine one one.
I was staying with them during college, it was. And
then I come home and they say you got to
come back, or you have to turn off the machines.
We go back in. It happened so fast because you know,
I'm only like twenty one at this time, and I'm
just and everyone's in shock because she was like the
heart of the family. And they go home and I

(34:12):
remember like looking out and seeing people just like walking
along and you know, you know, holding their their drink
and like just they had just had lunch and now
they're and then somebody's walking back with groceries and these
other people are laughing and like life is going on.
And I was like, you know, but and I was like, Okay,
it's not the birthdays and the Christmases and the New

(34:35):
Year's that we remember. It's not these big events. It's
like life happens on a Tuesday, and that becomes a
marker in your life. And you're like that day. Anything
can happen on any given day and you don't know it.
My grandmother went to bed not knowing that the next
day would be the last. None of us knew.

Speaker 1 (34:54):
Right. What did cancer gave me? Things which I was
reflected on later. It gave me courage because I think
I was a little bit of a scaredy cat when
it came to asking for things at NBC, I was like,
I can't ask. They don't have it. They always say no.
Every you know, I can't do it. I can't do it.

Speaker 2 (35:12):
By the way, it was part of part of the
conditioning of being a minority woman. Yeah I know, you know, yeah,
it's very easy for business affairs to say no.

Speaker 1 (35:19):
Yeah, to say no. So I remembered after I got
sick and I had a mistectomy and I got this
weird epiphany. It was like in the middle of the
night and I got four words. I got you can't
scare me. And I was done with fear over stupid things,
real things. I would be afraid of stupid thing. I wasn't.
So I went to Rockefeller Center. I hit fifty two

(35:43):
on the button where it took me up to the
where your ears pop. And I walked into Jeff Zucker's office,
who was the head, and I said, you're starting a
new hour of Today. I said I want that hour
and he was like, the who is this? I go,
I my name is Hoda. I said, I work at Dateline.
I know I'm in a box. I just had cancer.
I'm not afraid anymore. I don't care. And I went

(36:05):
through this big speech and I walked out of there
like my heart was pounding. I was literally sweating through
my clothes. I went down and was like, oh my god,
I did it. I did it, Like I couldn't believe
I actually said it. And two weeks later there was
a producer who liked me who was starting that show.
Two weeks later, they called me and they were like,
we're going to give you a shot, and I was like,

(36:25):
holy crap. If I hadn't have been sick, I don't
think I would have had the gut. I would have
continued because life was fine, but there was something about
life having margins and get busy and stop being afraid
of frivolous things. So it kind of gave me that.

Speaker 2 (36:44):
But because nothing you realized that the scariest thing is
at your doorsteps. Yes, right, You're like, what else? Could what? Air?
You saying no, right, yawn, That's what I felt like.

Speaker 1 (36:57):
BS, who cares? So what did when you? So you
got sick and then you were thinking, I'm sure you
were thinking about having other kids and what would life
be like? So did you think, well, those are dreams dashed,
we should just continue or what? What changed?

Speaker 2 (37:12):
So we had actually planned to. I had frozen my
eggs twice in my thirties and so and we got
pregnant naturally with Malcolm, and I was like, let's unfreeze
these eggs and turn them into embryos. And that was
actually already scheduled for the very next day after I
learned I had breast cancer. So John was like, what

(37:34):
should we do? What should do? Because you know and
I said no, no, no, you keep we keep going,
I don't know what's going to happen. Turns out it
was the best thing because I like, I wouldn't be
able to carry and hormones are really dangerous. So we
turned those eggs into embryos and we got a good amount.

(37:55):
But I had this. I just was nervous, right because
I've heard of friends getting a lot of because I
froze my eggs when I was thirty four and thirty nine.
The thirty four year old eggs were great. The thirty
nine year old eggs were all a wash. So like
sixteen eggs didn't go wow. So because at at certain ages, right,
like one month is good, one month is not good,
and so that would happen to be not a good month.

(38:17):
And so I'm thinking, like, well the process, I'm like,
oh my gosh. So I'm like, I have we have
to try again. We have to try.

Speaker 1 (38:22):
You weren't afraid, like the cancer, the sickness, what does
this mean? You've just kept you.

Speaker 2 (38:27):
I was afraid. But I realized then that I think
I'll be afraid for the rest of my life because
we always have to look over our shoulder because you're like, Okay,
the breast cancer is there, I had a double messectomy,
but it maybe there's trace amounts and could have come
back into my bones my blood. So it's always going
to be there. And I had decided that I will.
I can't choose where the fear wants to be and

(38:50):
wants to sit. And I'm like, you might be sitting
passenger side, might be sitting in the back, but it's
going to be in the car of my life and
it's going to be with me. So I just go,
you're there.

Speaker 1 (38:59):
Just that's it.

Speaker 2 (38:59):
Yeah, there, And so I did. I said to John,
I want to try again. And my fertility doctor, doctor Wong,
is amazing a close friend, and he was like, look,
there's a cancer protocol I can put you on. It's
going to be minimal hormones because and it's going to
take you about minimum six tries to get there. And
we wanted a little girl, and so I was like, okay,

(39:23):
I was like, I need like two more girls. We
had one girl with the thirty nine year old badge
and I was like, I want like two more, and
he was like, we're going to go for one more.
He's like, because I want to keep you safe. And
that's He's like, but he goes, but you're gonna have
to gear up to do it a lot because at
my age at that point, he said, one out of
ten eggs is going to be a healthy eggy viable. Yeah, yeah, inspiable.

(39:46):
So then I went in and then the first time,
they're only able to get out seven. So I'm doing
the math. Okay, we've lost, you know, thirty percent, and
then only two made it to blastosis, which means they're
able to go get tested. Then they get tested, and
he was like, just prepare yourself because the numbers on

(40:06):
are on our side. And also it's a fifty fifty
girl a boy. And I remember I was talking with
John one day and I said, look, I know he
said one more, but you have to let me support
me going for two more. I just feel like I
need two more. And he was like, okay, if that's
what you feel, I'll support you. And then we got
a call that day from doctor Wong and he's like,
it's the dream. It's two healthy baby girl embryos. It

(40:28):
was like less than one percent chance we got it.
And then my daughter May May she's one of those
two eggs. So if I hadn't gone through that again,
this little girl wouldn't be here screaming all of the time.
She screams, Malcolm doesn't scream really and may mae is
that she's you know what she did the other day?

(40:48):
This is this was the craziest thing to me, Like
just the thought process. It's only with me, I don't know,
you know, it's the moms that you get on her.
She comes over, mommy, mommy, and then she decides she
doesn't like throw. She decides to looks at me, decides
to squat down, lay down, throw her hands back. It
was very decisive of every step she goes starts screaming, screaming,

(41:11):
and she does that a lot. So this time I
was like, I go, may mate, that looks so uncomfortable.
And I walked because usually I'll pick her up and
be like hey, but this time I was like, come on,
So then I walk away. And then when she opens
her eyes, she's like and then she sees me and
she doesn't even get up. She scoots with her legs
on her back to find me, finds me, and then
screams again. She does that around the house. It was

(41:33):
like I moved four times. I couldn't believe it. This
girl Oh my god, she's feisty, man, she really is.

Speaker 1 (41:39):
Wait, so you're parenting and John's parenting similar. You guys
are pretty on par with each other.

Speaker 2 (41:47):
We were raised pretty differently, you know what. We have
the same values. Yeah, and we really get along and
we really like each other. So you know, not to
say there aren't arguments. Our arguments come from. I thought
about this a lot because one of my friends are like,
do you guys ever fight? And I was like, yeah,
just like what do you fight about? And I cannot
remember a thing that's good like that we specifically thought about,

(42:09):
but what we do fight? And I could narrow it
down to what makes us fight? And it's just miscommunication.
It's I said this thing, and then you thought I
said this thing or I told you to do this thing,
but you didn't, and it's like and it's miscommunication with
a combination of feeling overwhelmed. Okay, And so it's never
really like a thing that we disagree on.

Speaker 1 (42:32):
Why do you love him so much?

Speaker 2 (42:36):
John is such a generous soul. He loves being needed.
You can put as much as you want onto his
plate and he will happily take it. He wants you to.
He's like, thank you for giving me this opportunity to
help you and to shine. There are so many people
in his life that he just steps up for all

(42:58):
the time. He you know, when I went through breast cancer,
he was running from my house to take care of Malcolm,
put him to bed and back to Cedars, bringing me
like food, and back and forth and back and forth
all day long. And he's incredibly funny. A lot of
people don't know that about him, but he's just he's

(43:20):
very nice, he's very thoughtful, he's so smart. This guy
is he really wants to go onto Jeopardy, not celebrity Jeopardy, oh,
regular real jeopardy. He's very like there's this website, the
jarchive dot com and they have every Jeopardy question ever
and they have it. They've made this little jeopardy like bords.

(43:43):
You can click on each one and it'll be like,
you know, it looks just like it and he just
nails it every time.

Speaker 1 (43:49):
So you got a smart, funny, sensitive, loving You said
you fell in love with him after Malcolm? What was that?

Speaker 2 (43:56):
Do you know?

Speaker 1 (43:57):
Can you put your finger on when.

Speaker 2 (44:00):
It's probably just like there's a you know, there's a
just a lot of things combined that that compound into
feeling like really safe with him. But I would say
it's probably the hurdles that we had to face early
on with just like merging our lives together. How is

(44:20):
that going to be? I'm going through postpartum anxiety. I
tell him, how does he handle that my mom is crazy?
She wants to set him up for me to be
mad at him, to take the heat off of her.
He handles out, well, there's just it's every time we
found a hurdle and he was there, and a lot

(44:40):
of times for me, I'm very much like I can
do it myself. Yeah, I got it, And there are
people like, no, no, let me help you in fight.
But John's very good at listening and respecting that, and
so oftentimes he'll say, like the way that he acts
is take your hurdle. I'll be on the other side.
And when someone when you trust someone enough to be
there and you see them with your you know, with

(45:03):
you know your child, it's you know, it's a very
I just knew like this is like a very special person.

Speaker 1 (45:08):
You know what I love about you. We've talked for
I don't know forty minutes whatever it is, and we
haven't mentioned work once, and you are overflowing with goodness.
It seems to me. I mean, you're doing this terrific show.
It's called Your Friends and Neighbors. It's on Apple TV.
But I feel like your life is so overflowing that
that's obviously it's important to you, but you can see

(45:30):
where but.

Speaker 2 (45:31):
It's it is my focus the things that I'm I'm
really happy that I get to do the show. Like
you know, before I I was offered the show, I
had called my agents and said, like, I don't want
to act anymore. Oh like, so don't don't put me
up for anything, just don't. I'm not available anymore till

(45:51):
the end of time. And by the way, I wasn't
going to announce it, you know how like actors are
like I'm retiring. You're just like you don't play for
the Yankees, Like we're not expecting you to be there
on Tuesday, Like where is he? First base is empty?
You know, I'm like, guys, it's okay, you know. And
so it was just a private thing that I was

(46:13):
I was making. It was a private decision. And then
and it's because I had gone.

Speaker 1 (46:20):
Through yes, so all the things.

Speaker 2 (46:22):
Yeah, and then and then, and then they called me
and they were like, hey, there's this show. You only
have to do one season. You could do more if
you want. They've expressed interest in that, but you know
it's John Ham Jonathan Tropper, the creator Apple. I read
it and was like, I think I can do this.
So when I when I did it, I forgot. I
kind of forgot that. I didn't really talk to John

(46:44):
about it. I was just like, I'm doing this and
we ought to go to New York now. And it
wasn't like until maybe like a couple months into shooting.
He was like, I should ask you, are you not
gonna retire now? What's happening?

Speaker 1 (46:59):
So? What is just if you find a project you love,
you'll do it exactly? What a great what a great
way to go through life?

Speaker 2 (47:06):
Right? Well, because also, you know, my kids need my time.
I need my time with them. I know how life
changes in an instant. But I also have a big
passion of helping women know about the lifetime risk assessant
tests with breast cancer. It's I had no idea that

(47:27):
when I talked about it it would be so far
reaching and help so many people, and but that was
my goal that's what I wanted. And I never had
a mission in life. You know, people were like, my
mission is I just had this passion mission my I
just wanted to have a nice life, you know, be
a good person, good daughter, good you know all those things.

(47:49):
And then all of a sudden, I I was like, oh,
And I didn't realize that till like maybe my fourth surgery,
and I was like, oh, this is what this is that.
Oh yeah, I could I if I do it right,
maybe I could. Maybe I could could really make a difference.

Speaker 1 (48:03):
Well, I think you talking about this test that people
are unaware of is super important. And it didn't surprise
me when I was watching what you're doing, because you
live your life in such a beautiful way in all things.

Speaker 2 (48:18):
So thank you.

Speaker 1 (48:18):
We do call this joy one oh one girl. So
what is it that is bringing you in this season
as we're reflecting on this life of yours? What's bringing
you joy?

Speaker 2 (48:29):
Like?

Speaker 1 (48:29):
What lights you up these.

Speaker 2 (48:30):
Days having a day off? You know when you look
at your calendar, John, I talk about that a lot,
when you look at your calendar and it's just like
there's nothing to do with one thing, so that you know,
I can hang out at home with the kids, or
I can get dressed and go out. You know, it's
just like when when I can do anything for myself

(48:52):
and my family. Just having an empty calendar on a day,
do you know that feeling?

Speaker 1 (48:57):
By the way, it's the best feeling in the world,
like I've got not one thing to.

Speaker 2 (49:01):
Do, so especially if it's not a weekend, you know
what I mean, pick a week it has to be
a weekday real life.

Speaker 1 (49:06):
No, no, no, yeah, the weekends are observed for Chuck
E cheese. Yes, I know the things that we do.
So if someone's listening right now and has gone through
breast cancer, has gone through a difficult child, whatever they're
going through and can't find that light, they're like looking
for it and they don't. They feel overwhelmed like you

(49:27):
felt during these anxious times of the surgery or maybe
when you were a little girl. What's some advice that
you would give them to try to find their way
out of that.

Speaker 2 (49:37):
That's a tough question, right, It's a big one. But
I know of it. No, but I understand it because
I am I'm asked that by other women who've gone
through breast cancer, because not everyone is in the position
that you and I are in We're so lucky we
were given the opportunity to fight. A lot of people
are in a position where they're told to get their

(49:57):
affairs in order, they got to figure out what to
do with their children. It's it's not the same for everyone.
So there are people who are facing real fear. And
so I think what I can say what has helped me.
I've had friends and stuff ask me like, how did
you find yourself again? And I don't think about it

(50:18):
as finding myself again. I think about returning to myself
and I'm like, when was it when I could just
have a day where I didn't worry about anything and
I put myself back there. I remember being with my
grandmother in her car, you know the kind of car
that's like the front seat is like one big seat

(50:39):
and you're just like no seatbelt, swishing around. The cops
are looking at you, going wait to take care of
your kid. That's awesome, keep it going and running errands
with her and going through the the bank, you know
when you have to do the tube that sucks and
then hearing that that sound of it, and then they
send back some you know, lollip and the humming of

(51:02):
the car and that sound of a turn signal when
it's quiet, and just driving on the streets, going to
the salon where she got her her rollers in for
the week, you know, the whole like curl it for
the week and you're good. And in that moment of
my life and in those specific moments, I didn't have
to think about anything. My mother, my grandmother were just

(51:26):
I was along for the ride. And it's so nice
to think back into return to myself in those moments
where I don't have to make any big decisions, where
life feels like it's forever. And I think that it's
really hard to do that when you're in a tough position,

(51:47):
when you're really scared. But with the time that we
have here on earth, no matter how long or short
it is, or no matter how quick it is coming
upon us, I to use that time to think back
on those memories and return to yourself. Just live in
yourself as much as possible.

Speaker 1 (52:08):
Girl. I love you, I love you awesome.

Speaker 2 (52:12):
Thank you for coming on my Oh my gosh, I'm
so excited.

Speaker 1 (52:14):
I feel very like I don't know tingly and.

Speaker 2 (52:17):
Oh well, I love you and I'm so happy you're
doing this. I was so happy. Let me just say
to hear you make that such a big decison, speaking
of not being afraid, you know, making that decision. I mean,
I think it shocked all of us because you're you know,
you and Jenner are so wonderful together and we everyone
just loves you and and you it didn't seem like
you were like, oh, like there's so much more for

(52:38):
you to do, and that was a little bit strange,
like where are you going.

Speaker 1 (52:43):
What's happening? Where are you going? Yeah, it's so funny
on those on those moments where you're like because when
you said I'm not going to act anymore, and you were,
you had you had made a big life choice. And
it was interesting for me too because when I remembered
feeling like a warm hand on my heart when I
just it was almost like my body relaxed when I

(53:03):
thought that's it, like this is the top of the wave,
and it's beautiful here. But I knew it was the top,
And as I was thinking about it, I remembered saying
to myself, like, I'm gonna see if I can sleep.
I can put my head on the pill without tossing it.
Did I make the right decision, and I went home
and I have a nine year old and a seven
year old. So my seven year old, who was six

(53:24):
at the time, was climbing a tree in the front
yard and she was up and down. I was thinking
about this Today Show thing and what should I do?
And I watched her climb up and down, up and down.
Look at me, mommy, I'm like, oh my god, you're
up again. And I was I go, sweetie, you're at
the top again. I go, now, what are you gonna do?
And she goes, well, I guess it's time to find
a different tree.

Speaker 2 (53:41):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (53:43):
I go, what, She's a different one, right, mom, I'm
already climbed this, And I go, yeah, yeah. So everywhere
I looked there were bursts and signs. So it's interesting
how life guides you. And the thing the only thing
I ever really wanted to do was like, I feel
like we all get one ride around the sun, so

(54:03):
just put goodness in and that's it. So I was like,
I just want to build something that makes people feel good.

Speaker 2 (54:09):
So that hurts someone say something, then you're just reminded
me of that. Said, A great way to double your
life is to do something different every day because when
we do the same things every day, the days all
blend in. But if you go to this coffee shop
instead of that, if you go ahead and just text

(54:33):
that one person, that one friend you've talked to a
long time, you will start to remember those days. Because
it's the things that are different that you end up remembering.
So then you're your days feel different, your days feel longer,
you remember the more you're you're just just do one
thing different.

Speaker 1 (54:50):
That's good, I know.

Speaker 2 (54:51):
So I've started doing that really okay, like even coming
here to see you.

Speaker 1 (54:55):
This is new, this is different, this is new. This
is difficult.

Speaker 2 (54:58):
Or with my children, you know, I have realized I'm
not the museum mom. I'm not good. John's always like,
do you want to go to the math museum?

Speaker 1 (55:04):
I do not.

Speaker 2 (55:06):
There's one here. I don't care. What about the children's museum.
It's for children, okay, what about the moment that's for adults.
I don't know how to explain this to you. He's
a big museum dad. But I've decided. I was like, okay,
I will go even if it's not something I want
to do, because I want to double my days. I
want to experience something new, do something new. Okay, we'll

(55:27):
double your life.

Speaker 1 (55:28):
We're going to end right there. It's perfect.

Speaker 2 (55:30):
I love you. I'm so happy I got to see you.

Speaker 1 (55:32):
Me too. Okay, that was like a beautiful conversation with
Olivia Munn. I mean, I'm smiling right now because I
had chills while she was talking about all the things
and what I mean as I was, as I'm thinking
about it, it's such a reminder that to have like
beautiful highs in life, all of the beautiful things that

(55:55):
have happened, she also had things that were really difficult
and challenge and I think it reflects both ways, Like
you could live your life kind of middle of the
road all the way and you don't have any of
these highs or lows, but your life will be just that,
like a straight arrow. But for Olivia, she's been through it.
She took risks, she fell in love or tried over

(56:16):
and over. She ended up having a career. She ended
up first falling in love with her son and then
falling in love with her soon to be husband, John Mulaney.
I'm so into Olivia Munn and everything that she's about. Anyway, God,
I feel floaty a little bit after her I don't

(56:37):
know what it is about her, but being in her
presence is beautiful. It's a beautiful, beautiful experience. Again, her
show Friend Your Friends and Neighbors is on Apple TV
season two, and I love that. She was like, I'm
not going to work anymore than she's like, okay, I'll
do that one. So everything's on her terms. How beautiful
is life there?

Speaker 2 (56:57):
All right?

Speaker 1 (56:57):
You know me? I like to close with the poem.
This one's one of my favorites, and it's called Joy
Chooses You. Joy does not arrive with a fanfare on
a red carpet strewn with the flowers of a perfect life.
Joy sneaks in as you pour a cup of coffee,
watching the sunlight hit your favorite tree just right, and

(57:19):
you rusher Joy away because you're not ready for her.
Your house is not as it should be for such
a distinguished guest. But Joy cares nothing for your messy home,
or your bank balance or your waistline. You see, Joy
is supposed to slither through the cracks of your imperfect life.
That's how Joy works. You cannot truly invite her. You

(57:39):
can only be ready when she appears and hug her
with meaning. Because in this very moment Joy chose you.
So when Joy comes knocking at the door, just let
her in. Thanks for listening, guys,