September 1, 2026 • 14 mins
Jodi shares how differently men and women think; the classic spaghetti versus waffles analogy - and why this shows up even at the deli when shopping! Women do take longer to order, but it's for good reason. A look at planning, priorities, and why sometimes the messy spaghetti brain is actually the peaceful one.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Listen
Watch
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to the Murphy, Sam, and Jody After the Show podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
So how about a little behind the scenes that you
don't even know about, Murphy? And you probably will find
this interesting, Sam. Our girls, Taylor and Phoebe, our daughters,
were at the house the other day while my mom
was there. And so we were all just visiting and talking.
You were not home.
Speaker 3 (00:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
I stayed away as long as I could. But, you know, eventually,
knowing the girls were there, I had to come by. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Then my mom bought you dinner. I know.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
No, it was great. It was... Honestly, I wish I
hadn't been taken away, as you know, for so long
because I was trying to get there.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
Sure. I was.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
The long way. Anyway, look, I wanted to tell you
about a conversation we ended up having about men and
about women and how differently we think. It was a
really good conversation. I told them my example. I was
telling Taylor and Phoebe my example of the spaghetti and
the waffles. And they've never really heard it or they
feel like they've heard me say it, but they don't
(00:56):
know what it means. And to break it down for
anybody who doesn't know, but we told stories too, like
women are like spaghetti and men are like waffles in
the way that they think. Men can compartmentalize like a waffle, right?
Speaker 1 (01:11):
Meaning the boxes.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
The little boxes. This belongs here and this belongs here.
And women are spaghetti. Everything gets jumbled up. And yes,
Phoebe brought up us working together and how, you know,
you can definitely be a waffle and I'm definitely a
spaghetti and she can see it sometimes and things like that.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
And we were just talking to me, meaning that I'm
a waffle. Yeah, of course you are.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Something can happen at work that, you know, is bothersome
to me and you've waffled it. And by the time
you see me at, you know, six o'clock for dinner,
you're like, Hey, and I'm like, spaghetti, you know, not often,
but we talked about that, how, how differently men and
women see things. And they were telling stories about, you know,
(01:53):
the men that they work with and, you know, boyfriends
and how that's different. And Nana even interjected some really
interesting stuff. And, um, I was thinking about something too,
that I had, that happened to me that I wanted
to talk about. I should have done it in the show,
but it was not even that long ago. It's happened
more than once, but I was at a deli picking up.
(02:15):
I was, it was one of those, um, grocery stores,
a specialty store where you go and You pick your
cut of meat or whatever. You're like, I need this
much ground meat or I'd like some fish. You know,
you walk right up. And the owner was chit-chatting with me.
And I was looking. And he said, hey, Jody, I'll
be right with you. And I said, I need a
minute anyway. He goes, oh, I know. Women always need
(02:37):
a minute. And I was like, what? And he came
over and he said, yeah. He says, women I find.
And he works here. He's like, women I find stand
here for a long time. And they take forever to
decide how many cuts of meat they want, what kind
of meat they want. They take forever. Dudes walk up
and go, give me two steaks. And then they're out.
And I'm like, oh, that's interesting. You know, nice to
(03:00):
see you. Thank you. Give me two steaks, whatever. And
then I thought about it.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
That surprises me.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Does not surprise me at all. Because what I wanted
to go back and say is. And not to him,
but I know what that is. Because when I'm standing there,
I'm not just making the two stakes decision. I am
not only in once. I don't live in the now
all the time. I'm thinking about how many people am
I feeding? What am I going to do with this?
(03:26):
Will there be leftovers? And if so, what can I
do with the leftovers? So I'm thinking about, you know,
how far can these two stakes go? You're just planning.
Women are always thinking. In more than one place.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
You're not even dealing with two steaks. You're dealing with,
like you said, some fish for Wednesday, some pork chops
for Thursday.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (03:45):
A guy is walking up there because she said, hey,
why don't you make steaks tonight?
Speaker 2 (03:49):
And he's like, okay.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
Give me two steaks.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Well, that's a good point. He's been told which one
to get. That's what it is. Honey, you go, you
pick up two ribeyes. You got it.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Maybe, maybe not. I do think it's lovely that... For
the most part, we're not trying to put people in
boxes here.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
No.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Not put you in a waffle box. But for the
most part, you live in the moment. And, you know,
you're in that moment. I wish I could be that
way more often, but my mom brain won't let me,
even though these girls aren't home anymore.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Yeah, I don't think that's the spaghetti and waffles thing.
I think, to me, that analogy for me is more
about the emotional and emotionally compartmentalizing things.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
Oh, it is.
Speaker 1 (04:27):
What it sounds to me like, you know, you're talking
about is that I mean, honestly, if I walk in
and I'm focused, yeah, the mom brain is an amazing
thing because when I walk in and I'm focused on
one thing, sometimes I'm so focused that I'm not going
to see outside of the, if I'm looking in the
meat case, I'm looking only at the ribeyes and trying
to choose which one and rationalizing that and not remembering,
(04:48):
oh yeah, there's filet over here and there's chicken over there. And,
you know, it's very easy for me to get micro-focused.
And I also, I think, I hope, he was either
tongue in cheek, you know, just being funny with you.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
He's being honest, but he found it funny. I wanted
to say to him, I wanted to go back and say,
here's why, but I'm not going to say that to him.
He doesn't care why.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
Well, and it's, it would be easy for somebody to say,
taking your time is indecision. And it's absolutely not that
it's the other, it's the actual.
Speaker 2 (05:16):
I'm making more decisions. Right. Yeah. I'm always saying, what
can I do with this? What do I also have
in the pantry that goes with it? Let's say I'm
looking at pork chops. What do I have? What do
I have to make a salad with that? I'm, doing
16 different decisions at one time. And that's why I
guess I had the analogy of the spaghetti because it
just feels like, it feels like there's always a lot
(05:38):
going on in my brain and I believe that's the
female brain as opposed to the male brain where you
can have a lot going on in your life, but
you're very good at this is right now, only what's
in front of me. And I'm jealous of that. It
sounds peaceful. to only worry about what's in front of you.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
You wouldn't be good at that. I think you need
to be who you are to be able to think out,
further out.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
I do think out. I know whose birthday is next
week and what I'm doing for them.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
I don't picture you as a let me just worry
about today kind of thing person.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
I wish. It's interesting to me that you don't find
that peaceful because to me it is. I find it
less peaceful that I am micro-focused because the list continues
to be long, and it's very difficult for me to— it' s
difficult for me to assemble the way that I— the way
that I think a day is going to work, it
doesn't work that way because I can't—I'm not realistic.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
Yeah. Is that a male brain thing, or is that
just you?
Speaker 1 (06:44):
I mean, I think it goes back to what you
were saying a minute ago. You can't classify everybody, but
I do think If we went back and Googled a
little biology on this, there are reasons for that. I mean,
you know, I think the male brain probably is somewhat
wired genetically to be a taskmaster kind of a brain,
you know. But again, everybody's different. I think skill sets
(07:08):
are different by different people. So it's not always a
gender thing.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
When you, Murphy, for you, like when you look at
your calendar for the day and like you're just saying,
in my head, I'm picturing how the day is going
to go. Are you focusing on that first big thing
you have to do or are you focusing on the
whole day?
Speaker 1 (07:25):
Well, I only focus on the big thing because the
other things don't really matter if you don't get the
big thing done.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
When I look at my day, I see everything.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Well, and I will say, I mean, I do, I
look at the day, but again, you can't, that's the
problem with a calendar and planning. And look, I'm not,
I'm not a pro at this because I struggle with
a lot, with parts of it because the list is
so big that, everything looks like it's an urgent priority.
And the truth is, it's not.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
Correct. There are things that are more important. However, like
I said, when I see my day, I see my
whole day. This part of my day with you guys
is a big, important thing. But I also know what
I have this afternoon. And when I see my day,
that's the reason I'm able to time manage. That's the
reason like a haircut appointment won't sneak up on me
(08:13):
because I see it. I know it's all there.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
You're better at that than I am. And you actually
can call a lot of it from memory. I know
that you rely, you know, as time goes on, you're
relying more on your calendar, as you should, because look,
no one can commit everything to memory. If everybody could,
there would be no reason to have calendars and computers
and phones.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
But I live one day at a time. It's just
I see my whole day. I know what I'm doing tonight.
I know what time I'm doing it, all that.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
See, I mean, I know I've got a haircut this afternoon.
Everything after that, don't know. I mean, I've got a
What I have is a list to go back to
that's prioritized, and then I'll pick up from there.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
Yes, but your priorities sometimes, Murphy, I know I've lived
with you for a long time, lived and worked. Your
priorities sometimes take over and become the only focus that
you will forget that haircut appointment. Yes. You will lose
track of time because, and I'm not saying that's good
or bad. I'm just saying it is. It is a fact.
So when I was standing at that deli, I'm thinking,
(09:07):
my brain is spaghetti. I am planning tonight's dinner and
tomorrow's leftovers. And what do I have in the pantry
that goes with those steaks? And a man walks up,
the dream customer for this guy, and goes, give me
two steaks. Well, he's compartmentalized. He's got two steaks on
the brain and that's it. That's what I was saying.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
I envy.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
That's all. But I can't do that, right?
Speaker 3 (09:28):
I shouldn't do that. You could work on yourself to
do that, but that's not your makeup.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
It's not. You're right. So you see your whole day.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
I do.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
Mm-hmm. I'm like somewhere in between the two of you.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
My problem is I have something else on top of it.
I see the whole day and then I am anxious
about the whole day. Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Don't worry about it.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
What day has ever come along that you didn't handle?
Speaker 3 (09:54):
I don't know. Things get thrown at you left and right.
And you've got to work them in. And the compartmentalized
side of me works them in.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Good.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
But the spaghetti side of me still knows there's 15
other things I've got to do today on the other
side of this that carry over to tomorrow or making
the dinner or deciding this or that, the other thing.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Which would you rather be? Would you rather be moved
a little bit toward more waffle or a little bit
more toward spaghetti?
Speaker 3 (10:20):
That's very hard to say. I like the comfort of
the spaghetti because I have the big picture. I know
the big picture. But the compartmentalizing sure is easy.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
One thing at a time.
Speaker 3 (10:34):
If I can just say, all I got to do
is worry about this, that takes pressure off of worrying
about the rest of it.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
One thing at a time. Okay, good to know. Good
to know. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
It actually to me brings in a component that's more
than the, you know, men are waffles and women are spaghetti.
It's the ADD part of things. It's the, you know,
it's the, that's really for, you know, for me, um,
because the, the more unfocused I become, sometimes the more
focused I become, if you know what I'm talking about. Well, maybe,
(11:06):
maybe it's the other way around because I become so
focused on one thing. I lose track of everything else
that's around me. But, um, But some of that is
symptomatic of today's world, unfortunately.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
It's heightened for you because of the world we live in.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Yeah, because, you know, when you've got sort of an
unusual career path like the three of us have where
it's a lot of, you know, components that you don't
necessarily see, you know, behind the scenes that, you know,
take time and effort and, you know, making sure that
those things work, which it's– the point is to keep
those behind the scenes. But, you know, because– It's why
(11:41):
you don't see a Disney character without his head on.
But I think that for me, for one thing, I
am expecting too much of myself. So the list actually
winds up being longer than a normal person's list would be.
That's one. But the point of the list, like you're saying, Sam,
(12:04):
and again, I struggle with it. So it's not like
I'm going to say this and it's going to sound like, wow, man,
this dude's got it under control. The way to do
that is the way that you don't stress about the
things that you need to do next is you don't
focus on those. That's what your list is for. That's
not what your brain is for.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
I know. I mean, that's common sense. I know that.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Yeah, right.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
I know it, but getting this to pay attention to that.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Right. You are sensitive to pressure. You are sensitive to
things needing to be done. Yeah. It's like you can't
breathe until they're done, but there's always something to do,
so you need to breathe. Yeah. I know it's easier
said than done, but.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
Yeah, but it's interesting to me, Jodi, that you're saying
that you envy that because to me, I think what
you have is a much more peaceful, grounded place. You
can separate things. You can park yourself and read at
night and enjoy because you have that sort of healthy
separation from the other things that you need to be
(13:02):
doing or whatever.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
I know it can wait.
Speaker 1 (13:05):
Everything actually does have its place. And so even if
your thinking feels like spaghetti, you're absolutely able to put
things in their boxes that they need to be in.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
I guess you're right, but I think of everything at
one time.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
I can. I know what's for dinner. I know that we,
you know, what's lunch. I know you're going to ask
me about lunch in a few minutes.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
Well, let's keep talking.
Speaker 2 (13:29):
And I'll know what my answer is. And I know
that I'm going to try to squeeze yoga in. But
I'm also doing Facebook Live tonight. All these things, I
just don't let them bother me. It doesn't bother me,
but they.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
All come at me.
Speaker 3 (13:42):
So you're almost like uncooked spaghetti. Whereas, okay, look, cooked spaghetti,
it's all like this.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
Jumbled. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:49):
Uncooked spaghetti, they're all separate.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
It's all together, but it's okay.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
Yeah. I've got this to do. I've got this to do.
I've got this to do. I've got this to do,
but they're all.
Speaker 1 (13:57):
You're more like a bundle of fresh pasta.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Yeah, you go. That sounds really nice. And back to
the deli with the two steaks. Missed any part of
the show? Get it all on the Murphy, Sam, and
Jodi podcast.
Welcome to the Murphy, Sam, and Jody After the Show podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
So how about a little behind the scenes that you
don't even know about, Murphy? And you probably will find
this interesting, Sam. Our girls, Taylor and Phoebe, our daughters,
were at the house the other day while my mom
was there. And so we were all just visiting and talking.
You were not home.
Speaker 3 (00:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
I stayed away as long as I could. But, you know, eventually,
knowing the girls were there, I had to come by. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Then my mom bought you dinner. I know.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
No, it was great. It was... Honestly, I wish I
hadn't been taken away, as you know, for so long
because I was trying to get there.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
Sure. I was.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
The long way. Anyway, look, I wanted to tell you
about a conversation we ended up having about men and
about women and how differently we think. It was a
really good conversation. I told them my example. I was
telling Taylor and Phoebe my example of the spaghetti and
the waffles. And they've never really heard it or they
feel like they've heard me say it, but they don't
(00:56):
know what it means. And to break it down for
anybody who doesn't know, but we told stories too, like
women are like spaghetti and men are like waffles in
the way that they think. Men can compartmentalize like a waffle, right?
Speaker 1 (01:11):
Meaning the boxes.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
The little boxes. This belongs here and this belongs here.
And women are spaghetti. Everything gets jumbled up. And yes,
Phoebe brought up us working together and how, you know,
you can definitely be a waffle and I'm definitely a
spaghetti and she can see it sometimes and things like that.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
And we were just talking to me, meaning that I'm
a waffle. Yeah, of course you are.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Something can happen at work that, you know, is bothersome
to me and you've waffled it. And by the time
you see me at, you know, six o'clock for dinner,
you're like, Hey, and I'm like, spaghetti, you know, not often,
but we talked about that, how, how differently men and
women see things. And they were telling stories about, you know,
(01:53):
the men that they work with and, you know, boyfriends
and how that's different. And Nana even interjected some really
interesting stuff. And, um, I was thinking about something too,
that I had, that happened to me that I wanted
to talk about. I should have done it in the show,
but it was not even that long ago. It's happened
more than once, but I was at a deli picking up.
(02:15):
I was, it was one of those, um, grocery stores,
a specialty store where you go and You pick your
cut of meat or whatever. You're like, I need this
much ground meat or I'd like some fish. You know,
you walk right up. And the owner was chit-chatting with me.
And I was looking. And he said, hey, Jody, I'll
be right with you. And I said, I need a
minute anyway. He goes, oh, I know. Women always need
(02:37):
a minute. And I was like, what? And he came
over and he said, yeah. He says, women I find.
And he works here. He's like, women I find stand
here for a long time. And they take forever to
decide how many cuts of meat they want, what kind
of meat they want. They take forever. Dudes walk up
and go, give me two steaks. And then they're out.
And I'm like, oh, that's interesting. You know, nice to
(03:00):
see you. Thank you. Give me two steaks, whatever. And
then I thought about it.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
That surprises me.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Does not surprise me at all. Because what I wanted
to go back and say is. And not to him,
but I know what that is. Because when I'm standing there,
I'm not just making the two stakes decision. I am
not only in once. I don't live in the now
all the time. I'm thinking about how many people am
I feeding? What am I going to do with this?
(03:26):
Will there be leftovers? And if so, what can I
do with the leftovers? So I'm thinking about, you know,
how far can these two stakes go? You're just planning.
Women are always thinking. In more than one place.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
You're not even dealing with two steaks. You're dealing with,
like you said, some fish for Wednesday, some pork chops
for Thursday.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (03:45):
A guy is walking up there because she said, hey,
why don't you make steaks tonight?
Speaker 2 (03:49):
And he's like, okay.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
Give me two steaks.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Well, that's a good point. He's been told which one
to get. That's what it is. Honey, you go, you
pick up two ribeyes. You got it.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Maybe, maybe not. I do think it's lovely that... For
the most part, we're not trying to put people in
boxes here.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
No.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Not put you in a waffle box. But for the
most part, you live in the moment. And, you know,
you're in that moment. I wish I could be that
way more often, but my mom brain won't let me,
even though these girls aren't home anymore.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Yeah, I don't think that's the spaghetti and waffles thing.
I think, to me, that analogy for me is more
about the emotional and emotionally compartmentalizing things.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
Oh, it is.
Speaker 1 (04:27):
What it sounds to me like, you know, you're talking
about is that I mean, honestly, if I walk in
and I'm focused, yeah, the mom brain is an amazing
thing because when I walk in and I'm focused on
one thing, sometimes I'm so focused that I'm not going
to see outside of the, if I'm looking in the
meat case, I'm looking only at the ribeyes and trying
to choose which one and rationalizing that and not remembering,
(04:48):
oh yeah, there's filet over here and there's chicken over there. And,
you know, it's very easy for me to get micro-focused.
And I also, I think, I hope, he was either
tongue in cheek, you know, just being funny with you.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
He's being honest, but he found it funny. I wanted
to say to him, I wanted to go back and say,
here's why, but I'm not going to say that to him.
He doesn't care why.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
Well, and it's, it would be easy for somebody to say,
taking your time is indecision. And it's absolutely not that
it's the other, it's the actual.
Speaker 2 (05:16):
I'm making more decisions. Right. Yeah. I'm always saying, what
can I do with this? What do I also have
in the pantry that goes with it? Let's say I'm
looking at pork chops. What do I have? What do
I have to make a salad with that? I'm, doing
16 different decisions at one time. And that's why I
guess I had the analogy of the spaghetti because it
just feels like, it feels like there's always a lot
(05:38):
going on in my brain and I believe that's the
female brain as opposed to the male brain where you
can have a lot going on in your life, but
you're very good at this is right now, only what's
in front of me. And I'm jealous of that. It
sounds peaceful. to only worry about what's in front of you.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
You wouldn't be good at that. I think you need
to be who you are to be able to think out,
further out.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
I do think out. I know whose birthday is next
week and what I'm doing for them.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
I don't picture you as a let me just worry
about today kind of thing person.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
I wish. It's interesting to me that you don't find
that peaceful because to me it is. I find it
less peaceful that I am micro-focused because the list continues
to be long, and it's very difficult for me to— it' s
difficult for me to assemble the way that I— the way
that I think a day is going to work, it
doesn't work that way because I can't—I'm not realistic.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
Yeah. Is that a male brain thing, or is that
just you?
Speaker 1 (06:44):
I mean, I think it goes back to what you
were saying a minute ago. You can't classify everybody, but
I do think If we went back and Googled a
little biology on this, there are reasons for that. I mean,
you know, I think the male brain probably is somewhat
wired genetically to be a taskmaster kind of a brain,
you know. But again, everybody's different. I think skill sets
(07:08):
are different by different people. So it's not always a
gender thing.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
When you, Murphy, for you, like when you look at
your calendar for the day and like you're just saying,
in my head, I'm picturing how the day is going
to go. Are you focusing on that first big thing
you have to do or are you focusing on the
whole day?
Speaker 1 (07:25):
Well, I only focus on the big thing because the
other things don't really matter if you don't get the
big thing done.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
When I look at my day, I see everything.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Well, and I will say, I mean, I do, I
look at the day, but again, you can't, that's the
problem with a calendar and planning. And look, I'm not,
I'm not a pro at this because I struggle with
a lot, with parts of it because the list is
so big that, everything looks like it's an urgent priority.
And the truth is, it's not.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
Correct. There are things that are more important. However, like
I said, when I see my day, I see my
whole day. This part of my day with you guys
is a big, important thing. But I also know what
I have this afternoon. And when I see my day,
that's the reason I'm able to time manage. That's the
reason like a haircut appointment won't sneak up on me
(08:13):
because I see it. I know it's all there.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
You're better at that than I am. And you actually
can call a lot of it from memory. I know
that you rely, you know, as time goes on, you're
relying more on your calendar, as you should, because look,
no one can commit everything to memory. If everybody could,
there would be no reason to have calendars and computers
and phones.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
But I live one day at a time. It's just
I see my whole day. I know what I'm doing tonight.
I know what time I'm doing it, all that.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
See, I mean, I know I've got a haircut this afternoon.
Everything after that, don't know. I mean, I've got a
What I have is a list to go back to
that's prioritized, and then I'll pick up from there.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
Yes, but your priorities sometimes, Murphy, I know I've lived
with you for a long time, lived and worked. Your
priorities sometimes take over and become the only focus that
you will forget that haircut appointment. Yes. You will lose
track of time because, and I'm not saying that's good
or bad. I'm just saying it is. It is a fact.
So when I was standing at that deli, I'm thinking,
(09:07):
my brain is spaghetti. I am planning tonight's dinner and
tomorrow's leftovers. And what do I have in the pantry
that goes with those steaks? And a man walks up,
the dream customer for this guy, and goes, give me
two steaks. Well, he's compartmentalized. He's got two steaks on
the brain and that's it. That's what I was saying.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
I envy.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
That's all. But I can't do that, right?
Speaker 3 (09:28):
I shouldn't do that. You could work on yourself to
do that, but that's not your makeup.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
It's not. You're right. So you see your whole day.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
I do.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
Mm-hmm. I'm like somewhere in between the two of you.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
My problem is I have something else on top of it.
I see the whole day and then I am anxious
about the whole day. Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Don't worry about it.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
What day has ever come along that you didn't handle?
Speaker 3 (09:54):
I don't know. Things get thrown at you left and right.
And you've got to work them in. And the compartmentalized
side of me works them in.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Good.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
But the spaghetti side of me still knows there's 15
other things I've got to do today on the other
side of this that carry over to tomorrow or making
the dinner or deciding this or that, the other thing.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Which would you rather be? Would you rather be moved
a little bit toward more waffle or a little bit
more toward spaghetti?
Speaker 3 (10:20):
That's very hard to say. I like the comfort of
the spaghetti because I have the big picture. I know
the big picture. But the compartmentalizing sure is easy.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
One thing at a time.
Speaker 3 (10:34):
If I can just say, all I got to do
is worry about this, that takes pressure off of worrying
about the rest of it.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
One thing at a time. Okay, good to know. Good
to know. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
It actually to me brings in a component that's more
than the, you know, men are waffles and women are spaghetti.
It's the ADD part of things. It's the, you know,
it's the, that's really for, you know, for me, um,
because the, the more unfocused I become, sometimes the more
focused I become, if you know what I'm talking about. Well, maybe,
(11:06):
maybe it's the other way around because I become so
focused on one thing. I lose track of everything else
that's around me. But, um, But some of that is
symptomatic of today's world, unfortunately.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
It's heightened for you because of the world we live in.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Yeah, because, you know, when you've got sort of an
unusual career path like the three of us have where
it's a lot of, you know, components that you don't
necessarily see, you know, behind the scenes that, you know,
take time and effort and, you know, making sure that
those things work, which it's– the point is to keep
those behind the scenes. But, you know, because– It's why
(11:41):
you don't see a Disney character without his head on.
But I think that for me, for one thing, I
am expecting too much of myself. So the list actually
winds up being longer than a normal person's list would be.
That's one. But the point of the list, like you're saying, Sam,
(12:04):
and again, I struggle with it. So it's not like
I'm going to say this and it's going to sound like, wow, man,
this dude's got it under control. The way to do
that is the way that you don't stress about the
things that you need to do next is you don't
focus on those. That's what your list is for. That's
not what your brain is for.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
I know. I mean, that's common sense. I know that.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Yeah, right.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
I know it, but getting this to pay attention to that.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Right. You are sensitive to pressure. You are sensitive to
things needing to be done. Yeah. It's like you can't
breathe until they're done, but there's always something to do,
so you need to breathe. Yeah. I know it's easier
said than done, but.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
Yeah, but it's interesting to me, Jodi, that you're saying
that you envy that because to me, I think what
you have is a much more peaceful, grounded place. You
can separate things. You can park yourself and read at
night and enjoy because you have that sort of healthy
separation from the other things that you need to be
(13:02):
doing or whatever.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
I know it can wait.
Speaker 1 (13:05):
Everything actually does have its place. And so even if
your thinking feels like spaghetti, you're absolutely able to put
things in their boxes that they need to be in.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
I guess you're right, but I think of everything at
one time.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
I can. I know what's for dinner. I know that we,
you know, what's lunch. I know you're going to ask
me about lunch in a few minutes.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
Well, let's keep talking.
Speaker 2 (13:29):
And I'll know what my answer is. And I know
that I'm going to try to squeeze yoga in. But
I'm also doing Facebook Live tonight. All these things, I
just don't let them bother me. It doesn't bother me,
but they.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
All come at me.
Speaker 3 (13:42):
So you're almost like uncooked spaghetti. Whereas, okay, look, cooked spaghetti,
it's all like this.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
Jumbled. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:49):
Uncooked spaghetti, they're all separate.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
It's all together, but it's okay.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
Yeah. I've got this to do. I've got this to do.
I've got this to do. I've got this to do,
but they're all.
Speaker 1 (13:57):
You're more like a bundle of fresh pasta.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Yeah, you go. That sounds really nice. And back to
the deli with the two steaks. Missed any part of
the show? Get it all on the Murphy, Sam, and
Jodi podcast.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, And Charlamagne Tha God!