I CUT OFF my long time friend because she made my wife uncomfortable…but my wife thinks I OVERREACTED! - r/AITAH | Reddit Stories - ok storytime

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, this is Jonnas is Sam your og Okay Storytime
podcast hosts. We have some great stories coming up.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
But before that, we have a quick two minute break
from the sponsors that keep the show alive.

Speaker 3 (00:09):
I cut off my longtime friend because she made my
wife uncomfortable. But my wife thinks I overreacted.

Speaker 2 (00:15):
Ooh, that's just normally the right move. Yeah, I don't know.
Your wife is on hard mode.

Speaker 3 (00:22):
Recently, I forty mail cut off contact with one of
my good friends a we'll call her Allison forty female.
I have known Alison almost sixteen years, long before I
met my wife. We met in college and were part
of the same friend group. By the way, this comes
from throwaway MSI on the Okay Storytime subured it. So

(00:44):
after Allison and I graduated college, we both moved to
the same city for a job. We found apartments close
by and would hang out regularly. We would do grocery
shopping together, hang out at each other's apartments, and go
out for dinner. One day, Alison told me that she
loves being time with me and that maybe we should
officially date. I told her that I liked her as

(01:05):
a friend too, but we were very different people. And
I did not think of her in that way. She
told me that since we already spent so much time together,
she just assumed I was interested in her and hence
asked me. And she also felt we were very different people.
She's like, no, no, no, I totally get it. I
wasn't actually interested in you either. I thought you were
interested in me doing.

Speaker 2 (01:25):
The classic Oh no, I'm just kidding a jiggy Yeah, dude,
that's so funny.

Speaker 3 (01:33):
We never discussed this. After that, nothing changed between us,
and we've remained close friends. One year later, I met
my wife. We started dating, and I couldn't be happier.
I remember thinking after our first date that she was
exactly the person I wanted to be with. She's smart
and caring, and I can't help but feel lucky I
found her. We both got married and are now happily

(01:55):
married for eleven years with one cute kid.

Speaker 1 (01:59):
See that you were like first date, Like, yeah, there
she is, there's my wife. That's crazy. Can't imagine.

Speaker 3 (02:05):
Allison also met her husband around the time I was
dating my wife, and she also married a few months
after me. We all remained good friends to this day.
My wife has asked me when I was dating. If
Alison and I ever dated, I was honest with her
and told her about that one night when Alison asked
me if we should date. She never had a problem
with Alison, and they both also went shopping together. The

(02:27):
issue started happening one year ago. Alison told my wife
and me one night that she was not happy with
her marriage and felt her husband did not treat her well.
I don't want to go into specifics, but four months
after that they filed for divorce and amicably separately. Alison
did start spending more time with my wife and me

(02:49):
as we were her emotional support. However, as time went by,
Alison started texting me and telling me how sad she was.
I always told her she was happy to visit us
anytime if she wanted to talk. My wife, however, did
not like that she was messaging me and not in
group chat, as she was as much of a friend
to Alison as I was. She also felt that it

(03:11):
was okay to be her support as a couple, but
didn't want her to see me along as her emotional
support and messaged me after ten pm about her problems.
I did follow what my wife said, as I feel
as a married couple. We should have boundaries with how
we talk to our friends, irrespective of their gender.

Speaker 1 (03:26):
How long, like fifteen years?

Speaker 3 (03:28):
Yeah, I see it kind of both ways. And there
is more because I do kind of understand what OPI's
wife is saying of this girl bad.

Speaker 1 (03:36):
Feelings for you.

Speaker 3 (03:37):
She's you know, her marriage is not working out, and
now she's trying to rely on just you for emotional
support even though we're all friends.

Speaker 1 (03:44):
Wait, was it her who had the feelings?

Speaker 3 (03:46):
I thought it was OP Alison other feelings or op Yeah,
Oh yeah, I know. Alison asked Op out and no.
People was like, hey, I don't see you like that,
and she was like, ah, no, mean me either. I
don't know if I said it in the wrong way,
but when I told Alison about this, she lost it
on me and started berating my wife for being controlling.
I tried to explain to her that it's just boundaries
that we have to set as a couple, and I'm

(04:06):
sure I would do the same if my wife's friend
was messaging her late at night. However, she was just
offended by the implication that she had any motives for
talking to me. After the fight, I decided to let
the situation cool off on its own and didn't reach
out to Alison. She also has not messaged me since then.
My college friends are now calling me and telling me
I am an a hole for ignoring Alison in such

(04:29):
a vulnerable moment and that I'm a bad person, which
is not what happened.

Speaker 2 (04:34):
No, it's really more like you got you were trying
to make everybody happy. Yeah, and it's like, honestly, dude,
I think you could still be there for Allison.

Speaker 1 (04:45):
I was just not in the middle of the night,
That's all he was saying. I think that's it. That's
all either in the middle of the night.

Speaker 3 (04:52):
My wife, of course, supports me, but feels like I
let the situation go too far. I do miss Allison,
but I am not comfortable talking to her if she
does not respect my wife in my boundaries and messages
me at any time of the day.

Speaker 2 (05:05):
You just mention is that as soon as she started
bashing your wife, she's good. That's when it's like, all right, yeah,
now back been married for eleven years.

Speaker 1 (05:14):
Do not talk bad on my wife. I'm my wife,
my wife.

Speaker 3 (05:19):
Do you think I offended Allison when I told her
not to message me late in the night. If you
were in my situation, how would you tell your friend
to respect your boundaries? And there is an update?

Speaker 1 (05:28):
Is that literally all that they say?

Speaker 3 (05:29):
I think that's all of these. I think he was like, Hey,
my wife's a little bit uncomfortable with this, do you
mind just like texting me in my business hours? Thanks
everyone for all your opinions. I don't know who to
talk to about this, since everyone around me seems to
think I was overreacting. I showed the post to my
wife and after reading it and the comments, she was.

Speaker 1 (05:47):
A bit mad at me.

Speaker 3 (05:48):
Rightly, according to her, I did omit some key facts
from the story that make Allison sound like a bad guy.
Here are some of the things I should have mentioned,
according to her. Number one, let's get it and asked
about dating once thirteen years ago. I should let it go.
She has been a great friend to us and a
great aunt to my son.

Speaker 1 (06:07):
Number two.

Speaker 3 (06:07):
Alison and I only hang out in social settings, mostly
at parties and get togethers with our friends and family.
My wife is in charge of my social calendar in
the way of like she's like, hey, we're going to
a party together on this day, or she's like, you
can you can go outside?

Speaker 1 (06:24):
On Tuesday at three pm, she calls Elizabeth. I've arranged
a playdate with all husbands. They can hang out today.

Speaker 3 (06:31):
Hence, she talks to Alison more than I do. She
has been a close friend of Alison for a long time,
and she spends time together with her and makes plans
with her even when I'm not around. Number three, Alison
has told my wife that she sees me as an
older brother who's very protective of her.

Speaker 1 (06:48):
This is true.

Speaker 3 (06:49):
I have very few good friends, and I do care
a lot about all. Before the messaging at night happen
only twice, we have do not disturb, but there is
a list of people as an exception, and Alison is
one of them. However, we only expect them to message
if there is an emergency. When Alison messaged me, my
wife first asked if she was okay, but then was

(07:10):
annoyed since we're both sleeping. Hence, when it happened again,
she asked me to tell her not to message late.
She also mentioned why she was messaging me and not
the group chat. Number five. Our fight happened three weeks ago.
My wife has been telling me every day to call
Alison and sort things out. We both still care about her.
My wife also thinks that Alison and I have huge

(07:31):
egos and are acting like kids and my post just
went too far. She called Alison this evening after reading
the post. They're meeting on Sunday for brunch. I am
not going as I'm not going to talk to her
until she apologizes to my wife. Let's see what happens.

Speaker 1 (07:45):
Go get brunch. What do you think you're chill? Is
this guy?

Speaker 3 (07:49):
I think he's what's reacting a little bit after reading
all of that. I think that I think his wife
was like, hey, can you just like let her know,
like we're not up after you know, ten pm? Yeah,
because it sounds says it woke her up. Was just like, hey,
can you just like let her know like it was
too late or something, and he took that super far.

Speaker 2 (08:07):
She's like, dude, what I was waiting for, like the
other shoe to drop of, Like, so here's the points
my wife said, I forgot to mention it. And they're like, no,
it was all exceptionally normal things.

Speaker 3 (08:17):
It seems like fine. Maybe I think she did a react,
but I also think o Bio reacted.

Speaker 2 (08:20):
But I do think that it's it's weird that she's
hanging up on the fact that they talked about dating
once thirteen years ago.

Speaker 3 (08:27):
So the TLDR is my wife now thinks I have
been rude to Alison and not emotionally available to her
when she needs us.

Speaker 1 (08:33):
He's like, I don't know what I'm supposed to.

Speaker 2 (08:37):
My eyebrows are my eyebows are raised.

Speaker 1 (08:40):
My eyebrows are raised at.

Speaker 2 (08:42):
The wife right now because it feels like she's like
low key manipulating him.

Speaker 3 (08:46):
I think he's just really confused. My wife read my
post and decided to take things into her own hands.
She's also good friends with Alison and told me that
she cannot stop being her friend just because of our misunderstanding.
She met Alison on Sunday for brunch. I took my
kid to a trampoline park and had fun after brunch.
This is my wife's description of what happened. She said

(09:09):
that Alison met her and looked sad. She immediately apologized
to my wife and told her that she said some
terrible things about her in the heat of the moment.

Speaker 1 (09:17):
That she did not meet.

Speaker 3 (09:19):
They hugged it out and had a nice brunch. I
also heard that a lot of tears were shed. Alison
told my wife that it has been feeling that she
has been feeling down since Thanksgiving since it was her
first Thanksgiving without her ex after many years, and was
overwhelmed with the prospect of being alone during holidays. Hence,
she wanted to talk to someone. Since she lost most

(09:40):
of her friends in divorce, as they were mostly her
husband's friends, we were the closest people to her and
she wanted to talk to us that night. She knows
my wife and I sleep early, and hence didn't message
in the group chat like she always does. She saw
me online at ten PM and hence messaged me hot.

Speaker 1 (09:57):
Hens is dropping a lot of hands right now.

Speaker 3 (09:59):
This, my part, was not correct, as I distinctly remember
being woken up from her sleep with her message, ooh.

Speaker 2 (10:06):
Oooowow now we've got the official yeah, first time husband's
been like, I.

Speaker 1 (10:12):
Don't wait a minute lining up.

Speaker 3 (10:15):
She felt bad that I was so dry in my
responses and lost it when I told her not to
message me at night. She also hated the implication of
ME telling her to use group chat, as she felt
I was her friend and I was pushing her away.
After that, from what I understand there was a lot
of talk about how I am emotionally unavailable to her,
and my wife also agreed that while I did a
lot of things, I never really talked to her in

(10:37):
detail about how she's feeling. After brunch, Alison gave my
wife a bag of gifts she got for my kid
for Christmas. She always spoils him, especially during the holidays.
My wife invited Alison to spend the night at her
place so that she could watch my kid open the presence.
Alison agreed, and she told her that she would come
in the evening. Alison messaged me before coming that she was

(10:59):
coming in thirty minutes and to tell my wife. Once
she came, it was nice to see her, and she
gave me a long, warm hug. We had a wonderful
time at night, but my kid was happiest since his
favorite person was home. We also had a nice morning,
and Alison helped me make breakfast while my wife got
my son ready for the morning. My wife got Alison
a sweater, but Alison commented how I didn't buy her

(11:21):
a gift. She asked me to assemble her furniture on
Friday and mount her new TV, so there goes my
free day on Friday. Overall, my thoughts on Alison is
that she is a good friend, and I know how
much I love my wife and never do anything to
jeopardize our relationship. Hence, if my wife is comfortable, I
should not make things weird and just be there for
a friend. I don't think there's going to be another update,

(11:43):
but I just wanted to write this as things turned
out okay at the end. And PS, A lot of
you messaged me privately. I read all the messages, but
I chose to ignore them without reply.

Speaker 1 (11:52):
Hence there is an update.

Speaker 3 (11:54):
You guys messaged me after ten am, so I chose
to ignore them.

Speaker 1 (11:57):
Yeah, I'm confused. I feel like this.

Speaker 2 (12:00):
Update and I might be wrong. I feel like this
update is going to be him being like yeah. So
I read your comments and I realized my wife was
controlling my entire life many update.

Speaker 3 (12:12):
I thought the last update would be final and things
are growing great and things are going great, but all
comments felt like you were trying to talk me off
the ledge. My wife is going to her parents' house
today with my kid, so today morning, during breakfast, I
asked her to read the comments on Reddit. She told
me that it's stupid I'm posting this on Reddit, and
she's sure I must have again embellish the facts to
suit my narrative.

Speaker 1 (12:34):
She refused to read the post.

Speaker 2 (12:37):
Oh, I feel like I was right.

Speaker 3 (12:41):
She feels she is great at reading people and she
knows Alison better than anyone on Reddit who just knows her.
Through my short post. She brought up how I go
to help my guy friends on their project sometimes early
Sunday mornings and asked me why I am hesitant to
help Allison. I am sorry to say, but she also
told all of you to get a life stop watching
soap operas, as real life is not as complicated.

Speaker 1 (13:06):
Wrong.

Speaker 2 (13:06):
Real life is actually probably even more complicated than soap
opera's because soap operas are just written figments of imagination.

Speaker 1 (13:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (13:15):
No, it sounds like it sounds like the wife is
completely dismissing his experience.

Speaker 1 (13:21):
Yeah, and the plus, I'm a little sauce on this wife.

Speaker 2 (13:24):
She doesn't want to read the Reddit post because she
doesn't want to read any comments that might be coming
at her.

Speaker 1 (13:30):
And I would bet you ten to one she's already
read it.

Speaker 3 (13:32):
She has a point. I help my friends all the
time and if she trusts me to be alone with Alison,
then it would be sexist for me to be hesitant
to not help her just because she's a good looking woman.

Speaker 1 (13:42):
But wasn't there just a moment where you kind of
expressed your uncertainty about Allison.

Speaker 3 (13:49):
After reading the comments, I am curious as to what
exactly is going on. So this is what I'm going
to do. I'm going to Allison's house tomorrow to help
her with furniture. I'm going to see if she says
anything remotely weird that is out of line. If she does,
I get a reason to avoid her in the future.
If she does not, then she gets her furniture assembled. Also,
I know I am one hundred percent faithful to my wife.

(14:11):
I am six y three and two hundred pounds, so
I don't think I need to worry about anything. I
liked the comment to go there early and get done quickly.
That way, I get the rest of the day to
myself and finally try out my new quest three for
the rest of the day. Finally, Alison messaged me this
morning and asked me what time I was coming. She
asked me to come at ten am since it's her
day off. Too and wants to sleep in late. Also

(14:31):
asked me what I would like to have for lunch as.

Speaker 1 (14:33):
She would be cooking.

Speaker 3 (14:34):
And there is another final update I will say really quick.
It seems like, oh P is uncomfortable with Alison and
has kind of brought that up and is getting dismissed.
I don't think you necessarily have to have a reason
for not wanting to hang out with someone.

Speaker 2 (14:50):
But like, wasn't I feel like the reason that he's
uncomfortable is because he's just like, I.

Speaker 1 (14:55):
Don't know what's going on anymore.

Speaker 2 (14:57):
Yeah, he feels because it seemed like he wasn't uncomfortable
at all at the beginning. He's like, yeah, I don't know,
it's it was fine. I told her my bat I
told her we can't text like this anymore. And then
she got really mad and is like, now at this point,
I feel like it's more like he wants an apology.
I guess, but it's like, I think you need to
get the apology from your wife with throwing the wrench

(15:18):
into this entire thing. Very strange because unless she was
spam calling you in the middle of the night, it's
like a text message to your phone and she was
mad that it wasn't in a group chat with her.

Speaker 3 (15:27):
This is my final update and hopefully my life will
be very uneventful in twenty twenty four. I recently wrote
a post regarding falling out with my friend Alison forty
female due to her not respecting the boundaries that I set.
My wife got us to reconcile on Christmas Eve, and
Alison asked me to assemble some of her furniture as
a Christmas gift. I thought that was my last update,
but everyone on Reddit seems to think Alison has some

(15:50):
ulterior motive for calling me to her place when my
wife and kid are off at their parents' place. So
the plan was I go to Allison's place at ten
am and assemble her stuff. She was to cook a
nice meal for me, and then come home and finally
get to play my quest three on my fright free day.
On Thursday night, I was talking to my wife before sleeping,

(16:12):
and her tone was slightly different. She had a hundred
questions about my visit to Alison's place. When I was going,
when I was coming back. She said that our toddler
son missed me a lot, especially when sleeping, since I
always took him in. She asked me if I could
directly come to her parents' place after I was done
with Allison's work and try to come there before dinner.
I was okay with that, but that meant I had

(16:34):
to leave Alison's place before two am, so I messaged
Allison and we decided that I would come.

Speaker 1 (16:40):
At nine am.

Speaker 3 (16:41):
I reached there around that time and Alison had just
woken up and was in her pajamas, as some of
you guys had predicted. She offered me coffee and breakfast,
but I had already eaten so just got the coffee.
She showed me what needed to be done and went
to take a shower and get dressed. After that, she
came to help me, but after she met up a
few things, I told her to just play something on

(17:02):
Netflix and continue my work. She then went to prep
for food. We talked about our friends, gossips, et cetera,
and to be honest, it was a really fun time.
I did confront her about why she told our friends
about her fallout and made me the villain. She taunted
me that unlike me, they call her to check on
how she is. One funny thing was my wife and

(17:23):
son kept on calling me every hour as my son
wanted to show me all the things he was doing,
so that kept us entertained too. Alison was mostly talking
to him while I was working. The food was amazing.
For context, Alison and I are from the same country
and were born in the same city, so she took
some curry that we only get in part of in
my part of the country. It was great and I

(17:44):
thoroughly enjoyed The food made the visit totally worth it.
To be honest, She did not say anything bad about
my wife, but asked me why my wife reached out
to her and not me. She also asked me if
our fight caused any tension between us. Finally, I was
done by two thirty pm. Since it was a four
hour drive. She asked me if I wanted to rest

(18:06):
for a bit since I had been working since morning,
but I decided to get going so that I could
make dinner. She also had a great time and told
me we should hang out more. Alison did pack some
leftovers for my wife and her parents. Overall, you guys
were wrong and it was nice to spend time with
dear friend. I did not get any creepy vibes from her,
But it would be creepy of you guys to not
listen to full episodes of stories like this. Just go

(18:27):
to Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or your favorite podcast app and
search up. Okay, sorry time, this is all little bit suspicious, Yeah,
a little bit loud.

Speaker 1 (18:36):
I'm still suspicious on the wife.

Speaker 2 (18:38):
Everything, and I don't think we're gonna get into any
confirmation about it.

Speaker 3 (18:42):
I feel like I'm on the edge of a cliff.
I'm like, oh, this is kind of weird, but we
never got any of the weird stuff. When I reached
my in law's place, it was late, but we had
a nice dinner, and of course we're able to tuck
my son in. I was talking to my wife and
my mother in law at night, and my mother in
law was pissed at why I would go to Alison's
place a lot. Apparently, my wife told my mother in

(19:02):
law about the whole saga, and she saw red flags
all over, just like you guys, girl red flags with who.

Speaker 1 (19:10):
Girl, No, my wife told you to do that. I've
been friends for fifteen years, dude.

Speaker 3 (19:17):
She scared my wife into thinking something was off. That
was the real reason my wife called me over early,
so that I finished my work sooner. I think my
wife was also calling me every hour to check if
everything was okay.

Speaker 1 (19:27):
I freaking knew it.

Speaker 3 (19:28):
However, I told him there was nothing to worry about,
and I had a nice time and Allison was very appropriate.
We had a great weekend and just returned today. Sorry
everyone if my post is not as spicy as everyone expected,
but guess this is real life. Wish you all happy
New Year. Something's wrong with his wife who was feeding
that information to the wife the mother, so the mother
in law and in law so her mom, no, no, no.

(19:49):
The wife was talking to the mother in law and
being like I don't know, like I talking to his mom.
No to her mom, to her mom, to her mom.
So Opie's goes over to Alison. Wife goes talks to
her mother in law and it's like I don't know,
like it's this is weird. Allison's gonna try something and
it's like putting, you know, talking so in the mother
in law. I gets mad at Ope when the freaking

(20:11):
wife told Ope to go over to Alison's house, was like, no,
do any encourage shit?

Speaker 1 (20:16):
And op replied he would be sexist if he didn't.

Speaker 2 (20:21):
I'm upset with my husband because he always ruins my
birthday plans.

Speaker 3 (20:27):
He's a hater and he needs to get out.

Speaker 1 (20:30):
Hey, you heard it here first.

Speaker 3 (20:32):
For that's all I have to say about that.

Speaker 1 (20:34):
Long story short.

Speaker 2 (20:35):
I thirty four female, am low on paid time off
at a newish job that I started in February. Step
son got married in August and a lot of my
paid time off was used for this, as well as
a few mental health days and a few sick days
over the course of the year with good reason. And
by the way, this comes from user buffalo chedd or
biscuit on the r slash Okay storytime subreddit, where you

(20:59):
can submit your stories. So, my boss has already said
that they can't make exceptions based on my circumstances when
it comes to attendance. They know my step son has
a brain tumor and stepdaughter has kidney issues as I
have had to use sick time to take stepdaughter to
the hospital.

Speaker 1 (21:18):
Dang, and they can't make exceptions that not like a
excused absence kind of thing.

Speaker 2 (21:24):
Yeah, I don't know that sounds that sounds a little
extreme to be like, we can't make an exception for
your son's brain tumor.

Speaker 1 (21:30):
I had a lot of doctor's visits and I.

Speaker 2 (21:33):
Am genuinely loving the job most days and so far,
despite the attendance, my work seems to like me and
my background does well. I come from a quality background
in aerospace and metal shops. This is a corporate inspector
for a jewelry retailer, so Fancier Metals. Similar principles of manufacture,
but different processes to get to final goods. Stepdaughter is

(21:55):
twenty one female, step son is twenty four male, and
husband is forty four male. A couple of weeks after
getting back from stepson's wedding, stepdaughter called and talked to
husband and I about a business trip in October to Vegas.
She is afraid to go alone to a conference, and
I can't blame her. She's very fit, but she has
a very small frame. She looks young, and she sometimes

(22:17):
gets hassled for this. A couple of weeks ago, she
had a fender bender well alone and the other driver
was very aggressive trying to intimidate her, and it's left
her a little shaken. Stepdaughter wanted her father and or
I to accompany her on her business trip, her first
being far away because she didn't want to be alone
in such a large city. Immediately after the call, I

(22:39):
told my husband that I thought they should go together.
He's been feeling more distant from his daughter, and she
is in the throes of adulthood and has a boyfriend,
school and her job. She is very busy and works
very hard. I thought it was a great time to bond.
Husband was adamant that we both go. Fast forward to

(23:00):
this week. I put in my paid time off, but
found out it's a longer stay than we were originally told.
And I have also been asking this week to book
tickets with husband. But he's been getting home late after
seven PM, doesn't come inside from the garage until after nine,
and takes a long shower. What is he doing in
the garage for two hours? He got projects in this Hey,

(23:21):
I got projects in my garage.

Speaker 1 (23:24):
Garage and you're doing for two hours, building up to.

Speaker 2 (23:27):
Two hours of jetpack time in the garage.

Speaker 1 (23:31):
Something's going on in that garage.

Speaker 2 (23:33):
I am a sleepy gal, so I'm usually asleep by
the time he gets out of the shower. I'm riding
this at three am because my husband just told me
he doesn't intend on going. He thinks we should use
this opportunity to bond, which would be nice if our
relationship was in need of more bonding.

Speaker 1 (23:49):
Yeah, he's like, I've already bonded with her. You bond with.

Speaker 2 (23:52):
Your daughter exactly. Opie says that my stepdaughter and I
are tight.

Speaker 1 (23:57):
Yeah tight point, Oh really this.

Speaker 2 (24:04):
I don't want to leave her in a large city
where she's going to be afraid by herself. I've also
never felt a desire to go to Vegas. I hate
large cities, and the only reason I wanted to go
was because my husband has friends out there that I
wanted to meet in person and to go on a
few desert hikes with Hubby while stepdaughter was doing work
stuff during the day. It is a huge opportunity for

(24:25):
stepdaughter's career. I also barely drink and don't gamble or
go shopping. While I like food, I don't have the
budget for the better restaurants. I told him I wasn't
comfortable that he made this decision, and I don't have
enough paid time off to cover all the days, and
I was angry that he made the decision without consulting me.
He started getting heated, saying he didn't do anything wrong,

(24:49):
but he kind of did.

Speaker 1 (24:50):
You kind of did, just because the time with your daughter.

Speaker 2 (24:52):
Another factor. My birthday is four days before the trip.
My husband has a history of either awful get gifts
or no gifts, and I get very anxious in the
days leading up to my birthday because Hubby always picks
a fight because he either didn't plan anything and feels
guilty or he calls me ungrateful.

Speaker 1 (25:10):
This guy sounds like a keeper.

Speaker 2 (25:12):
A few memorable birthdays include painting my car, which sounds
nice in theory, but husband painted it himself with a
very fancy professional paint system, three stage paint with base color,
catalyst and blue sparkle additive. Hubby is not professionally trained, however,
and the car that was supposed to be a dark

(25:32):
blue ended up with legit rag marks in the paint
and deep scratches, varying degrees of sparkle who some areas
had a ton, some had none, and you could see
the old silver paint through the blue. It ended up
terribly orange peeled, and it was an and it was
a laughing matter at my work. I tried to give

(25:53):
him the benefit of the doubt while he was doing it,
and then found out that was the gift. When my
birthday rolled around. If there was a plan, he said,
my car was the only plan. I was angry, as
this destroyed the value of my car. I hadn't even
indicated that I wanted my car painted, and he went
ahead and started, so I couldn't tell him no. He

(26:15):
confirmed this the day he started painting, that he started
so I couldn't say no. Literally from the horse's mouth,
this guy.

Speaker 1 (26:24):
Is self centered. I don't like this guy.

Speaker 3 (26:26):
Oh p and you're one of our family, and I
don't want you to be treated this way.

Speaker 1 (26:30):
He deserved someone who cares about your birthday, about him.

Speaker 3 (26:33):
And he's making you take I mean, like, even if
you have a close relationship with his daughter, like with
your stepdaughter, it's still not okay for him to just
kind of like put the whole trip on you. And also,
I mean, it seems like there's gonna be a lot
of time where you're kind of.

Speaker 1 (26:47):
By yourself because she's working.

Speaker 2 (26:49):
Two years ago, he got me no gifts, not the
first time of no gifts, but this time was memorable
because of the following. He asked me where I wanted
to go, and I said, my favorite sushi restaurant in
the city, which is about a twenty minute drive, because
I had just discovered it and really loved the cucumber salad.
To this day, they know me as the cucumber salad girl,

(27:11):
and the chef always puts out extra that's incredibly cute. Yeah,
oh it's a girl here, go home. Gom husband then
takes me to a random sushi restaurant in our town
that had just opened because he wanted to try it
and thought it was a nicer restaurant than my favorite.

Speaker 1 (27:31):
It's not your birthday. He picked a.

Speaker 2 (27:33):
Fight with me about me being ungrateful because I didn't
want to eat at another sushi restaurant on my birthday
and I wanted to eat it my favorite. He went
outside to cool down, and I quietly cried at the table.

Speaker 3 (27:46):
I've been freaking watching Last five or listening to the
Last five Years album.

Speaker 1 (27:51):
This is that, This is that.

Speaker 2 (27:53):
The owner of the other sushi restaurant brought me a
birthday diikon radish dish that was covered in cinnamon and
sugar because I had no birthday cake. The owner was
super sweet and got me to stop crying and to
note this was the year I told my husband, I'm
done planning my own birthdays. I told him in advance
because I was tired of planning my own celebrations and
cooking the meal and cleaning the house, and that he

(28:16):
could figure it out. This was the celebration that he planned.
No family was invited or even asked to come. Last year,
I left town to visit my half sisters, first time
meeting them in person.

Speaker 1 (28:28):
They're twins.

Speaker 2 (28:28):
They were born twelve years before me, but birthdays were
two days apart. Husband had been upset I was leaving
town for my birthday, and I pointed out that I
was trying to avoid the usual blow up and he
never planned anything. He still blew up because I was
running away and he was worried I might not come back.

Speaker 3 (28:47):
Trader right, yeah, m maybe trader better and she'll come back.

Speaker 1 (28:51):
Made me think.

Speaker 2 (28:52):
About why would be worried about that and then take
steps to address it. I told him that his reactions
were why I wanted to celebrate away from him, because
I wanted a nice birthday for once, no gift, but
he did send me a Vemo for the trip, and
I accepted that this was an improvement. Four years ago,
I had planned my own birthday party, did the cooking

(29:14):
and cleaning things. Sister in law brought me cupcakes. Mother
in law bought me some very nice jewelry, and I
was happy. Hubby got nothing, and when everyone asked what
he got me, I admitted nothing. After the party, he
was upset and picked a fight. I stood my ground
that if he felt bad for not getting a gift
yet and he should have gotten.

Speaker 4 (29:36):
Me a gaft, are you a fool? You know the
song Where Is My Mind by the Pixies.

Speaker 2 (29:49):
He doesn't get to be mad at me because he
didn't get me a gift, and I wouldn't lie to
his family. He admitted he had wanted to get me
the jewelry, and when he saw his mom had actually
got me some, he was upset.

Speaker 1 (30:01):
I'm sorry you want it isn't doing oh a thought
about it? Who cares? This isn't middle school. It's not like, oh,
oh my god, I can't believe I wore the same.

Speaker 2 (30:11):
Outfit as that other person. It's like you can get
her jewelry as well.

Speaker 1 (30:14):
We aren't in your mind palace.

Speaker 3 (30:16):
Your thoughts don't actually form into physical objects, nice things.

Speaker 2 (30:23):
He told me that he was upset and that it's
the thought that counts. I told him that applies to
when you get a gift and it's not the best
fit for the recipient, not because you thought about getting
a gift and decided not to.

Speaker 1 (30:37):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (30:39):
I joked that I was thinking about getting him a
trip to Paris for Christmas, and since I told him
I didn't have to get him anything for Christmas or
the trip, Yeah.

Speaker 1 (30:48):
Throw it right in his face.

Speaker 2 (30:50):
Yeah, throw that stinky, illogical nonsense back back on his plate.
He was mad at that one for a while and
was upset that I might not get him Christmas gifts. Dude,
Oh my god, I.

Speaker 1 (31:01):
Canna give me a creamy. I'm not gonna get you
a Christmas giving? Who cares?

Speaker 2 (31:06):
By the way, I wanna teach you something, which is
that you can listen to full episodes with stories like this.
All you gotta do is go to Spotify or Apple
Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts from and search.

Speaker 1 (31:18):
Okay, storytime. So this brings me to this year.

Speaker 2 (31:22):
I just had a conversation while typing this out with
husband about admitting he wasn't going to Vegas. He admitted
it was a test because he wanted to see my reaction.
I told him that is a red flag, yeah, exactly,
and that these kinds of tests are designed for me
to fail. It removes any possibility of communicating. And while

(31:42):
he was angry, I had told him I was angry
with him. I wasn't okay with his manipulative behavior. I
don't feel safe going to Vegas, nor have I ever
wanted to go there, let alone with the added responsibility
of parenthood. He said it was an honor he was
trusting me with going with his daughter. Told him it's
a responsibility and making decisions without me, and that it's

(32:04):
unfair to test me like that. So am I the
a hole. Things took a weird turn, And yes, I'm
aware my husband is coming across as very toxic he
can be. But this is a frustrating moment and description.
While I am upset and frustrated, I'm very concerned with
your husband's behavior, I.

Speaker 3 (32:22):
Am also really concerned with your husband's behavior. I don't
like it. And I think the fact that like, we
haven't heard all of the other stuff in your relationship,
we're only going off what you've given us, yes, which
you should kind of take that in and be like,
why did I only write.

Speaker 1 (32:38):
Hey, it's Sam. We're gonna get back to the stories.
But here's three minutes bads from our sponsors.

Speaker 3 (32:42):
My mother in law thinks she's the mother of my
kids and even tried to make it legal.

Speaker 5 (32:47):
Stop I'm gonna make that illegal because that's wrong.

Speaker 3 (32:50):
So I understand that s O should have made an
active attempt to keep mother in law at a distance,
but I truly believe he has only now woke up
to her and her actions, and he now he realizes
how truly messed up the situation is. By the way,
this comes from I'm Edel, and if you want to
submit your own.

Speaker 1 (33:06):
Stories, go to our slash Okay storytime Separate It.

Speaker 3 (33:08):
My partner, male twenty four, and I female twenty one,
share one biological child together, male four months, and my stepson,
male three. My partner and I got pregnant early into
the relationship.

Speaker 1 (33:18):
Oops.

Speaker 3 (33:19):
We have been together for one and a half years.
I understand this isn't long, but I didn't realize the
absolute crap show of a family I was getting myself
into before I felt pregnant. My partner at the time
did not see his son my stepson often, and when
he did, his son would go to mother in law
for the sleep side of things, as she insisted. This
arrangement was something created between s SO and mother in
law before my arrival into the relationship. So used to

(33:42):
live in an airbnb when he and stepson's mom broke
up and stepson's mom still lived in the granny flat,
refusing to see so Todd is Op's s O. During
this time, when stepson's mom couldn't look after him, mother
in law would step in instead of Todd.

Speaker 1 (33:56):
Todd is now in court for.

Speaker 3 (33:57):
Custody orders between him and stepson's mom, and they're able
to communicate well regarding stepson now. We have him fortnightly
from Thursday to Sunday. Early into the relationship, I helped
Todd clean up rooms filled with step son's mother's dirty
clothes in the granny flat to create a room for
step son to live in and feel at home. And
we're to call step son, we'll call him Billy Lee.
I pushed Todd to work with Billy's mother to establish

(34:18):
some kind of care agreement. I went out and bought
Billy clothes, toys, posters of bed, et cetera. With Todd
so that he had a place to feel like he
belonged while he was over. This also gave Todd more
confidence to care for Billy alone and not rely on
mother in law. Mother in law never let Todd figure
things out on his own before I was around. She
would constantly try to tend to Billy at any given
moment and offered to look after Billy for the night

(34:41):
so Todd could sleep. She would cry and beg until
Todd aloud or to take him. This later created a
horribly toxic relationship between Billy and mother in law, which
would become a recurring issue. We currently live with my
mother in law. Early in the relationship, she convinced Todd
and me to move in with her to save money,
claiming I was wasting money by renting. She has always
been frugal believes everything is value. She's also a significant

(35:02):
order with the backyard completely run down and cluttered with
items everywhere.

Speaker 1 (35:06):
Oh, this is going to be an ICU for her.

Speaker 3 (35:08):
She has a tendency to take out loans and never
repay them or go on payment plans for unnecessary items.
One is a massage chair where she makes one payment
and then ghosts the company. She taught Todd not to
pay back his car.

Speaker 1 (35:20):
Loan to the bank, convincing him that it was the
people's money and that debt collectors couldn't do anything if
he just never answered their calls. I'm sorry, no.

Speaker 3 (35:28):
She would ask about the loan constantly and get upset
when he told her he made a payment. She would
then create some kind of debt he oweder, rent, phone bills,
et cetera that needed to be paid urgently, blaming his
bank repayment for why he couldn't pay her, and that
he should do what she's been telling him to do
and just ignore all of her calls and not pay
her back. As simple as that, she convinced Todd to
transfer most of his important assets, car phone, et cetera

(35:50):
into her name, and made her self a nominee on
his bank clothes to speak on his behalf. I have
since convinced Todd to start making repayments, explaining the legal
reality to him because we are now considered to facto.
If debt collectors came after him, my belongings could also
be seized to make up for the outstanding balance. Confirmed
with a lawyer.

Speaker 1 (36:08):
Oh fun, good, great, great payod debts man.

Speaker 3 (36:11):
We have since removed her as a nominee on the loan.

Speaker 2 (36:13):
Good.

Speaker 3 (36:13):
My credit score is fantastic good. I always pay my
bills in a dance. Todd's credit score, on the other hand,
is the gutter with unpaid bills that have been forgotten
for years and the debt collector problem. I didn't know
any of this before falling pregnant. Mother in law moved
into the granny flat into the backyard while I was
around seven months pregnant, and Todd and I moved into
the main house to prepare for our family again.

Speaker 1 (36:34):
This was her idea.

Speaker 3 (36:35):
At the time, I was beyond grateful for the opportunity
to have a house to live in and grow my
family and while we search for rental. Well, what an
aft up idea that turned out to be. Over the
last few months, I've realized all of her so called
good deeds and offers were ill intended. I didn't even
know one eighth of what I know now regarding her,
her relationship with Todd and the kids, and the true

(36:57):
state of the home we now live in. Todd grew
up with mother in law shielding him from his father
until just a few years ago. Mother in law is
kept Todd around to fill her own voids, ghosting all
her friends and other family members. She makes comments such
as here my baby to Todd, and I do everything
for my grandchildren. Whenever Todd stands up to mother in law,
she runs to Todd's dad, who then asks, why is
your mom upset. Todd is always made to feel wrong

(37:19):
or guilty and ends up apologizing for my baby shower.
I had a message board where everyone could write notes
for the baby. Mother in law was the only one
who drew a massive heart around her name and wrote
forever love from mother in law mom Nana. She truly
believes she is the mother to Todd's kids, or at
least tries to be. My baby was in the nice
you for his first month. When he came home, I

(37:41):
was beside myself, terrified of hurting him and struggling with
p and D. Made worse by the lack of sleep.
Mother in law offered to babysit, let's name him Tommy,
my bio son. I just said, fine, I know, just
is shocked for a few hours so Todd could sleep.

Speaker 1 (37:57):
Never me.

Speaker 3 (37:57):
Of course, she kept offering, and Todd except I asked
her to only stay for a few hours if she
was comfortable not all night, and constantly reassured her that
I'd be back in three to four hours to take Tommy.
Mother in law insisted, getting upset and saying she'd stay
all night because she left it. I told Todd I
wasn't comfortable with this, but he gave me an ultimatum.
Unless I planned to stay up all night, I should

(38:18):
let mother in law do it. What mother in law
looked after Tommy nearly every night for two weeks.

Speaker 1 (38:23):
I regret this heart.

Speaker 3 (38:24):
I forgave Todd for a lot during late pregnancy, labor,
and postpartum. I was afraid of arguing, so I pushed
a lot aside. He slept in my bed a few
hours after I gave birth while I sat in a
chair rocking our baby to sleep, too afraid of what
would happen when he woke up. While Tommy and I
were in the hospital him for breathing issues and I
see you me for preclamcia, Todd kept making points about

(38:45):
needing to go home to feed and walk the dog,
go to the gym, et cetera.

Speaker 1 (38:48):
He hated sleeping on the recliner bed.

Speaker 3 (38:50):
We had a plan for what to do with Billy
if I went into labor while he was at our house,
we agreed he would go back to his mom. Mother
in law, however, cried and begged Todd on the phone
while I was being induced keep Billy, promising to look
after him. Todd gave in I now resent Todd and
don't know if we will stay together. I'm terrified of
what that means for Tommy because I believe Todd will
make amends with mother in law and when Tommy visits him,

(39:13):
mother in law will be around to take Recently, Todd,
his dad, and stepmom have had a falling out with
mother in law. We have been searching for homes and
trying to cut ties with her. She started going through
our bins, googling my medications and telling me not to
take them, name calling and manipulating Billy, fake crying when
he wouldn't give her a hug, then laughing when he did.
Mother in law has not seen Tommy in nearly two

(39:33):
months since the major falling out. She also hasn't seen Billy.
Now she is threatening Todd, claiming she has grandparent rights
to see both children. She insists she has the right
to see Billy because she had a more yet says,
I'm respecting your space and boundaries and waiting for you
to let me know when I could see them. But
you can see us right now or in the future
if you listen to full episodes with stories just like this.

(39:54):
Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or iHeartRadio and search
a book a storytime. But there is a little bit
left to the story.

Speaker 5 (40:00):
I think this is like a reality check for the
mother in law. Yeah, the world is falling apart. Yeah,
what she already had and it was already falling apart.

Speaker 3 (40:08):
Finally, Opie's partner is way like Todd is freaking waking
up because I'm sure Opie has been trying to say, like, hey,
your mother is getting too involved.

Speaker 1 (40:18):
Keep in mind too, Opie is very young.

Speaker 3 (40:20):
Oh he's twenty one, but also acting a lot more
mature than the twenty four year old.

Speaker 1 (40:24):
Yeah, but I mean these you see her.

Speaker 5 (40:25):
I can see the mother in law manipulating what she
did in the very beginning, manipulating and like, no, this is.

Speaker 1 (40:30):
What adults do, Like you're in a little you know,
I got this. And don't get me wrong.

Speaker 5 (40:34):
With the right people in the right in laws or
just parents and grandparents, they want to help.

Speaker 3 (40:38):
Yeah, And I'm also sure like because Todd was nigh
it was probably twenty when he, yeah, met his father,
twenty when he became a father.

Speaker 1 (40:46):
He became a father and also a medicine and met
his father crazy.

Speaker 3 (40:48):
Not only does she see Todd as her child, but
she also manipulates and dumbs him down to keeping him
attached to her. She's now treating the kids as hers
and is willing to fight us in court for visitation.
I am trying so to make this work, to pull
Todd out of the financial and emotional mess mother in
law created. But with everything happening, I think this relationship
will fail, and if it does, mother in law may

(41:09):
end up raising my son with me having no real
leg to stand on. I think you just have to prioritize,
not really, honestly, I feel like right now you can't
really prioritize helping Todd get out of his financial situation.

Speaker 1 (41:22):
The only thing you can do.

Speaker 3 (41:23):
Yourself and make sure you have a great place. You know,
you have a place to live, you have a job,
like make sure all of that is as that is,
so that you can get access to your or you
can get custody.

Speaker 1 (41:34):
Of your kids.

Speaker 5 (41:35):
That's because you thought mother in law would have been
like a like a safe haven, like we.

Speaker 1 (41:40):
Get a house. We have actually have a roof over
my head. No such thing as a free lunch.

Speaker 5 (41:45):
Get away from that situation. Take your kids away from
that situation because that is very toxic.

Speaker 1 (41:49):
Yeah, but that is the end of that story.

Speaker 3 (41:52):
My brother ditched us for his fiances lifestyle.

Speaker 1 (41:56):
Now he doesn't want us at his wedding. Sorry, I'm too.
Rudemysrena a little bit of background.

Speaker 3 (42:02):
I thirty six female, have twin siblings, thirty female and
thirty male. We were very close growing up. I did
a lot of the parenting of them due to Dad
having terminal cancer and mom having to be his career.
By the way, this comes from examination number sixty four
sevent nine and if you want to spit your own stories,
go to our Sashoke storytime subbured it. So when dad
passed away when we were twenty and fourteen, it brought

(42:24):
us even closer together.

Speaker 1 (42:25):
We leaned on each other.

Speaker 3 (42:26):
Always went to festivals in gigs together every year, and
were actively involved in each other's lives until about eighteen
months ago.

Speaker 1 (42:34):
Wow.

Speaker 3 (42:34):
I would also like to point out that he has
invited all of my stepfather's family from Scotland, some of
whom he hasn't seen or spoken to for seven years.
I believe this is referring to the brother now who's
getting married.

Speaker 2 (42:44):
I mean, I mean Scottish hey, Scottish ties, they run deep.

Speaker 3 (42:50):
Invited all of them to the day, but not our
local uncles, Mom's brothers, both of which played a huge
part in supporting us whilst Dad was poorly. They have
also excluded our mom from wedding dress shopping, despite her
offering to help financially with the wedding, and our stepfather
was gutted to learn that he has now decided against
kilts for the men. He's a proud Scotsman and he

(43:11):
has been left out of suit shopping. Also, that sucks, dude,
No kilts for the Scotts.

Speaker 1 (43:15):
Were we doing? Dude?

Speaker 3 (43:17):
Am I overreacting or am I justified in being upset?
I am seriously considering not attending at all at this point?
Would that make me an a whole? Also for information,
our sister, his twin, was supposed to be his best
woman and hasn't been given a plus one. She's also
considering either stepping down or not attending at all.

Speaker 1 (43:34):
And there is a long at it, so we'll stop there. Guys. Firstly,
have we spoken to brother? Yeah, that's my question. Have
we sa Have we communicated this anger? Have we discussed
what we want to see here? Have you given him
a list of demands and said unless these are met,
I'm not going to the wedding. Kilts for all Scott's,

(43:57):
kilts for Scott, Tori, Scott's for.

Speaker 2 (43:59):
Killing He's most that's upset that the uncles aren't invited.

Speaker 1 (44:02):
The other uncles op. He is upset about that. I believe, Yes,
that's the main point. Yeah, I don't know. I think
at that point, well, we got uncles aren't invited, no
kilts for Scott's.

Speaker 3 (44:14):
The is it this sister who is the best woman
can't bring up plus one that is whackers.

Speaker 2 (44:20):
That's the only thing I've heard so far that would
I think justify like a threat to back out. I
think I think realistically like the uncle stuff is probably
not ideal, But I don't know. I think you pulling
out of the wedding would just make everything a bigger deal.

Speaker 1 (44:34):
Um. But there is an edit. My sister is recovering
from an ed and has worked hard to recover. Di
has told her that she has to wear the same
dress as the maid of honor, and the maid of
Honor is choosing the dress. The maid of honor is
a very different body type to A and I is
a I guess the sister. Let's call her Alissa?

Speaker 3 (44:54):
Yeah, okay, and an ill fitting dress, which she would
have to pay for, would set her back months, if
not a year in recovery. This is another reason she
is thinking of stepping down. Would I be the a
hole and edit add information ied, I mean eating disorder,
not a rectile dysfunction. She has struggled with this since
she was around five. Wow, But thanks to our amazing

(45:14):
NHS and incompetent GP, we were told children.

Speaker 1 (45:17):
Cannot get eating disorders.

Speaker 3 (45:19):
So she was only diagnosed officially around two years ago.
She has worked amazingly hard to get to a better place,
but this is a lifelong struggle and we all try
very hard to help her stay healthy, or I thought
we all did. She's amazing and I am her biggest cheerleader,
and that's why it hurt so much that not everyone
has her health in mind. This is my brother's first relationship.
I don't know if this explains more about his thinking

(45:41):
and unwillingness to voice his own opinions and personality. I'm
unsure if he was worried about losing what took him
so long to find my mom. Mom is a hard
one to explain. There's always been an element of favoritism
for the only boy. My sister and I grew up
in the knowledge that our brother was the golden child
and could do no wrong. I feel my mom is
grieving for the relationship she once had with d and

(46:02):
let's call him Daniel. Myself and my sister have always
had a difficult relationship with her. She loves us and
we know she does, but there is always a little
bit of woes me I can't do anything right when
we try to speak to her about how we feel.

Speaker 5 (46:17):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (46:17):
I feel like that's a common thing for likes moms. Moms. Yeah,
I'm just a terrible mother. Ah you should They know
how to play hard, Yeah, they play it a lot.

Speaker 3 (46:26):
She seems to be stuck between a rock and a
hard place. She wants to stand up for us girls
and for what she feels is right, but also does
not want to risk losing what little relationship she still
has with my brother. Mom's brother is the other sad
part of this. Earlier in twenty twenty four, he was
diagnosed with a rare form of cancer that had spread
rapidly through his body. He's already very weak and will
almost certainly not make it to the wedding day.

Speaker 1 (46:48):
All three of us have a brilliant relationship with him.

Speaker 3 (46:51):
He took me to my first football match and sparked
a lifelong love for my team, And we have all
cried with my mom about this. I think she was
hoping for at least a symbolic invite to the wedding,
but that hasn't happened either.

Speaker 1 (47:02):
But you know what should happen you watching full episodes
with stories just like this.

Speaker 3 (47:06):
Just go to Apple podcast, Spotify or iHeartRadio and search
a Pokey story time.

Speaker 1 (47:11):
But there is a little bit left. Do you have
any final thoughts on this? I mean honestly final thoughts.

Speaker 2 (47:16):
I'm canceling the wedding because dude, like you didn't let
the scotsman wear kilts or why are we even inviting
the Scots At that point.

Speaker 3 (47:24):
It's like, if you're not gonna let the Scottsburg kilts,
then get out of.

Speaker 1 (47:28):
Scotland, you know, don't don't know, they're not Scotland, all
the Scots metaphorically.

Speaker 2 (47:32):
You know, what are we doing not inviting the terminally
ill father.

Speaker 3 (47:36):
Uh brother, the uncle. Oh yeah, that mother's brother also
super messed.

Speaker 1 (47:42):
Up, super messed up. I mean this is you know,
this is.

Speaker 3 (47:44):
A person who's not gonna be around for a long
like a long period of time, even if he couldn't
necessarily make it to the wedding, just as Op said,
like just having that symbolic invite of saying like we
want you to be there and we understand if you help,
your health does not permit you to. But yeah, uh,
it's just being invited to things. That's nice sometimes even

(48:05):
if you know someone's.

Speaker 1 (48:06):
Busy, it's true even if you don't go.

Speaker 3 (48:08):
My sister has decided that when she is less upset,
she will write him a letter to explain how she
is feeling. She's a very good and a mode of
writer and feels that she can edit and explain herself
better in writing than in person, as she will get
flustered and forget to mention things when she gets upset.
I will update if and when my sister sends her
letters to him and with his reaction, and there are
some comments to finish this story off. Comment one, is

(48:31):
your partner upset she wasn't invited? If so, don't go oh,
he says, my partner is blissfully happy in most circumstances
in life, and that's why we are happy. I feel
that I am more frustrated by the inequality of it all,
and I am even more angry and sad for my
sister than myself and my partner, as we are older
and have had more life experience and understand that some
things aren't worth the fight or the argument.

Speaker 1 (48:52):
But she is his twin.

Speaker 3 (48:53):
They have always been amazingly close and supportive for each
other and have always said cradle to the grave. So
for this to be you ripping them apart is heartbreaking.
That is really, especially because Opie said that they were
so close up until eighteen months ago. Yeah, and like
I mean the bond between like twins especially, I'm sure.

Speaker 1 (49:10):
Yeah, this ah messed up, dude, messed up.

Speaker 3 (49:15):
Comment two not the a hole, But I hope you
can stand some contact with him in case she is abusive.

Speaker 1 (49:20):
If he ever.

Speaker 3 (49:20):
Decides to leave, he may need to have someone in
his corner. Opie says, the door will always be open
for him. I would never turn him away. I've told
both of my siblings before, no matter what, I will
always leave the light on for you.

Speaker 1 (49:32):
Ah.

Speaker 3 (49:33):
Comment three, not the a whole. Your poor mom, she
must be heartbroken over how her youngest son is behaving
towards his family.

Speaker 1 (49:39):
Please go.

Speaker 3 (49:39):
If your sister decides to remain as best woman, she'll
need you. Also suggest to her to get the dress
altered to fit her body properly. She needs to look
amazing in photos. Your brother is being an absolute a hole.
Don't lower yourself to his level. They may be of
a higher socioeconomic bracket, but that doesn't equate to class.
And Opie says, I will absolutely be there to supporter

(50:00):
if she goes, regardless of my opinions on the matter.
I will make sure she looks amazing and most importantly,
feels amazing, and I will make sure that we all
have an amazing day. And that is the end of
that story.

Speaker 1 (50:11):
I mean, that's about all you can do at that point.
I also, I mean, it doesn't seem like you've had
a conversation yet with the brother. Yeah, so it's up
with that.

Speaker 3 (50:19):
Try Yeah, if you have cool, but if you haven't,
you know, attempt that. See if you can get him
to change his mind on any things, and just tell
him how you feel, how your family feels.

Speaker 1 (50:30):
Start with the kilks. Yeah, start with the kilts. Start
we're small John here.

Speaker 2 (50:34):
We're gonna get back to this juicy story, but a
quick three minute break of aths from our sponsors. I
excluded some family members from my wedding because of their
discriminatory past. Getady the throwaway, but I'm ninety nine percent
sure the family will find this anyway. Recently, my boyfriend
twenty five mail and I, twenty four male of four years,

(50:56):
got married. I come from a very traditional, if not stereotypical,
let you know family the chief may or the gossip
is deeply ingrained in the whole family. By the way,
this comes from user tax Dude to twenty twenty three
and if you want to submit your own stories, go
to the Okay storytime subredding.

Speaker 1 (51:12):
So.

Speaker 2 (51:12):
I have about seven uncles, one of which is also
by like myself. He got married some time ago, and
when he sent out invites to the whole family, a
large majority of them declined because of religious reasons, which
really saddened him. I kept this in mind when it
came time to send out my invitations and those particular
family members did not get one. About a week ago,

(51:33):
my husband and I went to my dad's house for
the annual family reunion. I really didn't want to go
because I knew in the back of my mind this
absolutely was going to get around despite the lack of
posting on any social media.

Speaker 1 (51:44):
But my dad and mom really wanted me there. They
are very supportive and.

Speaker 2 (51:47):
The be loud and proud type of people, and I
love them to the grave for it. Even if it's
a little obnoxious. The spirit is what counts, right. I
voiced this concern to my dad and he was very
insistent that if crap goes south, he'll be right there
with me to laugh about it. The entire time. My
husband and I are getting some intense side eye. The

(52:08):
family that didn't attend didn't even try to hide the
fact that they were whispering about my husband and I.

Speaker 1 (52:12):
About two hours.

Speaker 2 (52:13):
Later, as I am six or so, whiskeys in the
straight uncles took initiative and decided to ambush me and
ask why they weren't invited.

Speaker 1 (52:22):
Yeah, what could it? Be Do you know why they
were invited?

Speaker 3 (52:30):
Yeah, Dora say it turns into Dora.

Speaker 2 (52:35):
I was polite and I reminded them that they turned
down the Bye Uncle's wedding for religious reasons.

Speaker 1 (52:42):
They responded with it least wanting to be thought about
and being invited. That's insane. Technically you were okay, retro.

Speaker 3 (52:50):
I know, we just said in the last story, like, oh,
you know, invite because even if they don't go, not
in this case. Well, yeah, these people were not in
this case because they're biggots. Because I'm sorry, Oh, we
weren't gonna come, but we wanted you to invite us
so that we could say.

Speaker 1 (53:05):
We're not coming to your wedding. What. Yeah, we wanted
you to invite us so that we could tell you that, yeah.

Speaker 3 (53:12):
We wanted you to invite us, so that we had
a chance to be biggots to your face, that's not fair.

Speaker 2 (53:19):
I told them that I did think about them, and
I decided they weren't worth the fifty seven cent postage
to be told they weren't going to attend for bigoted reasons.
It would be understanding to say that their reaction was
less than pleased. Crap hit multiple fans. My uncles went
off for being compared to a postage stamp. My dad
was eating it up. My mom was a little pissy

(53:41):
at me for causing a disturbance in her house, though,
which unfortunately made me question everything in the moment.

Speaker 1 (53:46):
My grandma was giving me the judges in Spanish. Look.

Speaker 2 (53:49):
My husband kind of grabbed my hand and said, let's
get out of here before you piss off any more
people in a laughing manner, and proceeded to drive us home.
My dad sent me a that's my boy, good on
you for standing up yourself text. My mom was still
less than thrilled about how things went down. My buye
uncle sent me a text saying thank you for standing
up for me. But now my relationship with my brothers

(54:10):
is strained to hack and I didn't want to.

Speaker 1 (54:12):
My phone and.

Speaker 2 (54:13):
Social media have been blowing the heck up ever since then,
but I'm kind of ignoring it. I do feel bad
for my uncle because he just wants to be close
with all his brothers and not just one. So Reddit
am I the a hole for the how things went down?
And there's an edit to broadly state this. I have
apologized to my uncle for using him as an example
in what happened, and I truly didn't mean to make

(54:34):
things harder for him with his brothers. I also expressed
that it isn't exactly healthy for his well being to
want to put up with them, knowing how they feel
about him before any of this happened. He kind of
remains silent on the topic, so I'm trying to leave
it alone and not force him.

Speaker 1 (54:47):
I would say, not the a hole, dude, And I
think you're at all the a hole.

Speaker 2 (54:51):
Your your uncle who's buy is just upset that his
you know, manufactured piece is being broken.

Speaker 3 (54:59):
Yeah, it's like the freaking military, you know. I feel
like it's that kind of thing with this family, especially
with uncles of like, oh, we're fine right now, we're
chill with our Bye brother, uh, because we're not talking
about it.

Speaker 1 (55:14):
He doesn't bring it out.

Speaker 3 (55:14):
We didn't go to his wedding, And as long as
we don't even think I have to think about it,
then we're gonna let him be near.

Speaker 2 (55:20):
They're just like, yeah, I'm talking to the straight half
of my Bye brother.

Speaker 1 (55:24):
Which is a really frustrating.

Speaker 3 (55:26):
I think the Bye brother is now having to kind
of reckon with like, oh, the second that anything about
my sexuality comes up, They're going to ostracize me and
blame me, even though I'm not even part of it.
I wasn't even part of that conversation.

Speaker 2 (55:38):
Yeah, they're like talking to someone over here, and then
they go, you should hear this too. Here's some some comments.
Number one, I'm curious why did they want to be invited?
Do they really get so much enjoyment out of being like, no, nephew,
I don't support your lifestyle, so I'm not going. I
would have asked if I had invited you, would you

(55:59):
have come?

Speaker 1 (55:59):
OHP responds.

Speaker 2 (56:00):
While there is no for sure way of knowing why
they wanted to be invited, they are very loudly anti LGBT.

Speaker 1 (56:06):
It's no secret.

Speaker 2 (56:07):
About half of their Facebook posts and Instagram posts are
them making it loud and clear that it's not right.
My favorite one was the one that circulated in June
with the family under the umbrella protecting them from the rainbow.
So between that and my uncle's wedding, I decided it's
not even worth inviting them. Comment to not the ahole,
but go ahead and apologize to your uncle. You did

(56:28):
not really need to bring him up at all.

Speaker 1 (56:30):
That's a no. I disagree.

Speaker 3 (56:32):
I mean, like, I understand what they're saying, but also
I think it's kind of silly because OPI was saying,
you didn't go to this wedding, so why would you
have gone to the mind.

Speaker 2 (56:40):
The uncle contextually, Yeah, is what makes his argument in
that moment. Yeah, the spirit is what counts though, Right.
So it sounds like he agrees and loves you for it,
but thought that it was a little obnoxious.

Speaker 1 (56:52):
Hope.

Speaker 2 (56:53):
He says that I did apologize to him, but I
expressed to him that this was kind of unhealthy to
want to be close to people who are so against
some thing you can't control. As for the whole obnoxious thing,
I think you may have misunderstood me.

Speaker 1 (57:04):
Haha. He's the one that's obnoxious about it.

Speaker 2 (57:07):
He's gotten me several several purple shirts and various articles
of clothing that are purple. A couple of years back,
we were watching football I don't know sports, and I
asked him.

Speaker 1 (57:15):
What a bye week is.

Speaker 2 (57:17):
His response was along the lines of the week where
football ares sleep with men, So you better get on
over there and get your pick. That kind of obnoxious.

Speaker 1 (57:26):
Haha.

Speaker 2 (57:27):
I'm glad he didn't turn out like my uncles. And
there is an update here let's get into him W
two's and ten ninety nine. So I finally done. I
finally have a break to post this. As I guessed,
family did indeed find this Between seven uncles. One of
my cousins likely showed them the post I originally made.
It was obviously not received.

Speaker 1 (57:44):
Well. Anyways, I'm just going to go down the list
and order of things or events that have happened with
my dad. First off, he wanted me to tell you
all that he loved all the support and that he
wishes to dad all of you as well.

Speaker 2 (57:57):
His words quote it took two of us to make
you And I gotta say I love my work. Any
parent that doesn't should never have tried.

Speaker 1 (58:03):
Well, your dad sounds like such a crazy walking double Yeah.
I love that.

Speaker 2 (58:07):
My mom she has called me asking why I brought
up the events of my uncle's wedding. I told her
that I was simply having a good time with my
husband and everyone else, that my uncles made the conscious
decision to want to start a problem. She got mad
and said she just wanted to have a good party.
I told her that I didn't want to be attacked
for my spicy proclivities and not inviting blatant bigots to

(58:28):
my wedding. But that I'm glad to hear that the
party meant moretier. Oh, I mean, well, let's I think
maybe pump the brakes on that.

Speaker 1 (58:34):
As a host. Yeah, but as a host you understand
to a certain extent.

Speaker 3 (58:38):
But also if one of my you know, the people
at my parties was being attacked for their identity, I'd
be like, the other person, get out of there, Like
I would blame the uncles more than the person being attacked.

Speaker 1 (58:49):
That's true, But you're also not like the Latino elderly mother.

Speaker 3 (58:53):
Which yeah, this is yeah, this is a different type
of you know, probably just explicitly as a host, strip
your personality.

Speaker 1 (59:01):
Someone's making drama, someone's involved in drama. Anyway, let's just continue.
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (59:05):
We got into a shouting match over the phone. I
told my dad what happened, and he's livid with her.
They got into a fight, and now she's staying at
my grandma's. I've apologized profusely to my dad, but he's
telling me to let it go and that I've done
nothing wrong. Above all else. This is what hurts the most.
She was always very supportive of me, and it feels
like a massive bombshell was just dropped out of nowhere.

Speaker 3 (59:25):
You can just have another conversation with her, because if
she's you know, she's not not supportive of you now,
I'm sure she just doesn't really understand that this was
a thing that needed to be said right and that
this wasn't something that you were trying to create drama over.

Speaker 1 (59:38):
It was just you were defending yourself.

Speaker 2 (59:39):
And that is a much more eloquent way of saying,
just pump the brakes, because there's a lot of politics
that go into how she's feeling about this, and it's like,
I'm sure she supports you and your decisions.

Speaker 1 (59:49):
My bye uncle. Unbeknownst to me, my husband invited him
over so he and I could have a heart to
heart about what happened.

Speaker 2 (59:55):
It annoyed me a little bit, but I'm glad he
invited him over. We talked about the post I May
and he saw everyone's comments. According to him, it kind
of opened him up to the crap he was just
ignoring so he could pretend to have a close bond
with all his brothers. At the same time, though he's
still not sure what to.

Speaker 1 (01:00:10):
Do from here.

Speaker 2 (01:00:11):
We talked for a few hours and had a good
cry hug about it. Everything is good on that front,
and it makes me happy. He'll be seeking therapy to
help him deal with his feelings on this and the
other uncles. Obviously, they are livid with me. They couldn't
believe that I post something like that, blasting them on
the internet. They said they didn't like being painted the
way I posted them.

Speaker 3 (01:00:32):
Oh no, then maybe you shouldn't have sat for that
painting the way that you did.

Speaker 1 (01:00:38):
Oh no, oh no? Why wait? Why did you tell
everyone that we're biggods? We like to keep that low key?
Why'd you do that? I didn't want everyone to know.

Speaker 2 (01:00:49):
I just straight up asked them if they thought my
bye uncle was going to the Lake of Fire because
of his marriage, and to my shock, they had no
problem saying yes. They didn't even try to dance around it.
In the end, I told them if they didn't want
to be painted as bigots, to lose the religious bigoted act,
plain and simple. My husband has been NonStop trying to
comfort me after the shouting match with my mom. He

(01:01:11):
can see the immense pain I'm in. I love that
man very much, though he took me out for.

Speaker 1 (01:01:15):
Steak and old fashions the other night to help get
me relaxed. That's all, folks. Thank you.

Speaker 2 (01:01:20):
By the way, if you want to listen to full
episodes with stories like this, all you have to do
is go to iHeartRadio or Spotify or Apple Podcasts, wherever
you listen to podcasts, search Okay, story Time and you
will find.

Speaker 1 (01:01:33):
The entire collection, the entire archive.

Speaker 2 (01:01:37):
It's over twelve hundred hours now, so have fun listening
to that.

Speaker 1 (01:01:40):
There is a little bit of story left. Sophia, do
you have anything to any final comments that here? Don't
listen to your uncles.

Speaker 3 (01:01:48):
They're gonna, they're gonna, you know, dude, like I've got,
I've got a lot of religious family and have heard
have heard things over the years. You just gotta kind
of tune those people out. And maybe you know, you
don't have to be a them if you don't want
to be around them and if they're.

Speaker 1 (01:02:01):
Not going to be supportive. But yeah, I think you
could definitely have a conversation with your mom about this,
And that's my final thought.

Speaker 2 (01:02:07):
Yeah, for me, I'd say number one thing is like,
I think, just try to salvage the situation with your
mom right now, because it really if and it's probably
her brothers, yeah, which is probably why she's a little
more defense about it. But it's like, I don't know,
I think, make her understand why you did what you
did and where you're.

Speaker 1 (01:02:23):
Coming from, and then try your best to forgive.

Speaker 2 (01:02:26):
Her because it was, like, I don't know, it just
feels like if it continues to go downhill from here,
it's you don't want your uncle's stupidity to be why
your relationship with your mom has gone downhill, you know
what I mean? Like, I don't know, but you know,
you're also in the right to be Like you didn't
stick up for me when I needed you to.

Speaker 1 (01:02:44):
What's up with that? Like, you're your right to be upset,
but I it's your that's a that's a pickle for sure.
Let's finish off this story.

Speaker 2 (01:02:50):
Though, Hello everyone, this blew up way bigger than the
original post did.

Speaker 1 (01:02:54):
God dang.

Speaker 2 (01:02:55):
I definitely appreciate all the love and support I've received
from everyone in the comments. As of this edit, I've
decided to put some distance between myself and a lot
of family My dad is in support of this and
will be coming over to my place more often than
me going over to his and my mom's to visit.
As for everything else, I've got my husband, magic, the gathering,
and a nice bottle of Crown winter wheat to help

(01:03:16):
deal with everything else. Seriously, thank you everyone. Words cannot
express how awesome all of you are. And that is
the end of that story.

Speaker 1 (01:03:24):
Well there we go. I I have it. I feel
like I feel like you. You know what to do. Maybe, Yes,
the heart's in the right place. You got a great part. Now,
you got a great dad, you got a good great uncle,
and you know this one. And we just send mom
to the moon. We just gona take a little little think. Yes,
come come back, come right back.

Speaker 3 (01:03:41):
It's gonna be like, hey, sorry about that. My brother
stole from me. Now he wants back.

Speaker 1 (01:03:47):
In my life. Oh uh, it's too bad, so sad
to try to steal your way back in.

Speaker 3 (01:03:52):
Most of this happened very recently, so for background, my
brother Andrew and I used to work for the same
company which was contracting. I did all the scheduling, advertising,
and relayed any complaints that came my way to the
right person By the way. This comes from Just Winter
eighty three seventy nine, and if you want to submit
your own stories, go to r slash. Okay, Storytime suppered it. So,
for instance, if a customer complained about the paint bleeding through,

(01:04:13):
which happened once because the guy had electrical problems that
caused a fire and gave the walls smoke damage, I
had to handle it. The guy bought the wrong paint
and the wall's bled. Needless to say, it was a
nightmare job. I did all of that for a few
years with BS pay and all kinds of nonsense, like
the boss blowing off estimates, make me lie to customers
because they wouldn't leave in time, or making me lie

(01:04:35):
for some other reason. It was complete BS to be honest.
After a while, the boss gained an unhealthy habit, so
my brother and I took over for a little while.
Andrew didn't like to go to estimates, so I had
my boyfriend go and we would split a percentage. Andrew
would then get upset if too many things came in
at once and he had to figure out a lot,
but he would also complain if nothing came in. Whenever
my boyfriend was busy and couldn't go. I'd ask Andrew

(01:04:58):
and he would cuss me out, asking why there were
so many I was he even working here?

Speaker 2 (01:05:01):
Man?

Speaker 1 (01:05:01):
He's like, why are there things for me to so
people are just employed with no explanation. He would then
ask why my boyfriend couldn't go, even when my boyfriend
was already out or working. Andrew never understood that.

Speaker 3 (01:05:12):
So I had to make a plan where we used
street view to look at houses to see what was wrong.

Speaker 1 (01:05:17):
Sometimes Andrew would tell.

Speaker 3 (01:05:18):
Me, oh, well, I'd have to see it, then proceed
to not see it, but still ask me where the
work was. I had to do that song and dance
for like two months, at least for once, I got
paid correctly whenever he would work. One day, Andrew did
a job that I had gotten him, ceiling and fixing
a lady's gutters. He got paid by the lady, but
I never saw my cut. Later, he borrowed gas money

(01:05:40):
from me, promising he would have my money for both
later that week. I still haven't seen it to this day.
Now to the backstabbing part of the story, Andrew and
I live together with my boyfriend, our dad, and his girlfriend.
It was easier since we all worked for the same company.
We used our work money to pay rent, utilities, et cetera.
Most of the time the boss just paid and said
it was taken out of our pay. But when the

(01:06:01):
boss developed that that habit I mentioned before and stopped paying,
we had taken on all the financial responsibilities. Let's just
say Andrew didn't like that. He preferred to party and
go out drinking instead of paying what needed to be paid,
and we got behind with the landlord, causing a lot
of stress in the house. I liked to party and
drink from time to time too, but I always made

(01:06:22):
sure work came first. I also made sure I only
did it on weekends so it wouldn't interfere with anything important.
I even helped Andrew build a home bar so we
and our friends had somewhere to drink. I also paid
for most of the stuff so Andrew could have a
Halloween party.

Speaker 1 (01:06:35):
I ended up making.

Speaker 3 (01:06:36):
A Hail Mary ad because work wasn't coming in. I
basically told people that bills were piling up, which they were,
and that we had skills, just needed work to get
through the holidays.

Speaker 1 (01:06:46):
Needless to say, Andrew hated this. Did he did he now.

Speaker 3 (01:06:53):
Even though it brought in at least thirty estimates. He
told me, why would you post this? It hurts my
pride as a man.

Speaker 1 (01:07:00):
Oh, it hurts my human pride. No, it should motivate
you to change. Yeah, maybe you should do better, dude.
I don't know, man, It's a wake up call. Come on.

Speaker 3 (01:07:09):
Andrew begged me to take the ad down. I refuse
because the bills needed to be paid and nothing else
was working. He eventually relented because of all the estimates
coming in, but then proceeded to blow off all the
ones he needed to see in person. I like, can
you fire him? Can you kick him out?

Speaker 1 (01:07:23):
What does he have? Tenure?

Speaker 2 (01:07:25):
Like? What is this?

Speaker 3 (01:07:26):
I ended up with only a little money to pay
the landlord, so I called him and gave him what
I had. I told the landlord he would get the
rest when we had it, and assured him we had
other estimates that would help cover the rest. Everyone in
the house was responsible for paying three hundred dollars. Since
rent also covered gas, sewage, garbage and water, cable, internet, phone,
and electricity was separate, Andrew continued to not pay his share.

Speaker 1 (01:07:47):
One time, I.

Speaker 3 (01:07:48):
Was lucky to get fifty dollars off him, and I
practically had to beg for it. Now, this is the
day before Christmas, Andrew and my father conspired a plan.
The landlord came by to check on things and talk
those to talk to him. I don't know what was said,
and then came in and told me, thanks to you
talking all kinds of bs the landlord, now we all
have to move.

Speaker 1 (01:08:08):
They refuse to tell me what was said.

Speaker 3 (01:08:11):
I mean, oh my gosh, well, but they're probably just
being you know, super awful and being like we're not
gonna pay or something like that.

Speaker 2 (01:08:20):
Yeah, I'm sure that's not your fault telling you what
happened get into there, just.

Speaker 1 (01:08:24):
Like this is your fault.

Speaker 3 (01:08:25):
You're the one pang. He's not Bang, or Andrew isn't Bang.
It stressed me out, and if it weren't for my boyfriend,
I don't know how I would have handled it.

Speaker 1 (01:08:32):
He helped a lot.

Speaker 3 (01:08:34):
After calming down, I called the landlord and asked him
what the issue was. He just said I don't want
any drama. I just want ret paid and told me
I did nothing wrong. At that point, I felt so
betrayed by Andrew and my father. I started packing my
stuff because I couldn't take the drama anymore. I guess
Andrew and my father didn't take it seriously. But when
they saw me taking my things out to the truck,

(01:08:55):
they realized I was actually leaving and tried to tell
me they loved and would before I left. I ran
one more ad and set up all the scheduling. Then
I told them I was quitting and that.

Speaker 1 (01:09:05):
They were on their own from now on. They didn't
believe me. My father said, you could just work remotely,
and I said, nope, I'm done with all the constant
work drama. I think that is the pausing for a second,
that is the best move, because it seems like working
and living with these people is a nightmare.

Speaker 2 (01:09:22):
Yeah, if you can remove half of your exposure, that's great.
I mean work drama a place where you work where
it's constantly dramatic. This sucks anyway, like let's and it's
I'm mostly thinking, I'm no, I'm not thinking about this
at all.

Speaker 1 (01:09:34):
I'm thinking about specifically the restaurant industry.

Speaker 2 (01:09:38):
It's like working at a dramatic restaurant is the most annoying,
draining thing, like on top of the work already. Yeah,
it's just like I mean, it's sales. It can get bad,
but like I haven't done as many all the restaurant jobs.
As soon as it gets like drama, drama, drama, it's like,
just go get a different one.

Speaker 3 (01:09:55):
Yeah, man, Because ever I heard everyone's always into each
other too.

Speaker 1 (01:10:00):
At the restaurant.

Speaker 3 (01:10:00):
Yeah, their Kimio was eating kim The day I was leaving,
Andrew was in shock. I asked him if the bills
were paid and he told me, yeesh, when they weren't.
I found that out later. Andrew also got upset that
I was taking my dog, who had been in the
family for ten years at that point, but they didn't
take care of her well since they all had their

(01:10:20):
own dogs. They let their dogs pee and poop all
over the house, and I was always the one cleaning.
At Yoicks, they dirtied all the dishes and I had
to clean them. My boyfriend helped, but Andrew would cook,
leave the dishes out and not even put them in
the sink or put away the food he used. Then
he would ask.

Speaker 1 (01:10:36):
Me, why can't you do any dishes today?

Speaker 3 (01:10:38):
I always made sure I cleaned mine, but Andrew never did.

Speaker 1 (01:10:41):
It always fell on me.

Speaker 3 (01:10:43):
After I left, Andrew kept checking in on me and
asking where I was moving. I didn't want to tell him,
but he wouldn't drop it, so I made sure my
boyfriend was okay with it first, and then told him.
My boyfriend didn't like Andrew because Andrew would always hit
on him when I was asleep and Andrew wasted. Even
though Andrew claimed he was straight, he would only do
it when intoxicated.

Speaker 1 (01:11:01):
Wait, whoa, Andrew, what are you doing? That's your sister's boyfriend.
Hold up.

Speaker 3 (01:11:08):
He also had a self centered, arrogant attitude that rubbed
my boyfriend the wrong way. Later, my boyfriend told me
that Andrew had thousands hidden away but couldn't help pay rent.
A few days after the move, Andrew called and just
so happened to be going on a vacation where I
had moved.

Speaker 1 (01:11:24):
I didn't buy it.

Speaker 3 (01:11:24):
My boyfriend didn't want him coming by, so I didn't
give him a yes or no. I sent Andrew our
house rules. No smoking inside, cleanup spills if you break it,
you buy it, don't be too loud, keep food and
drinks off the couch, and no booze inside. He never responded,
so I guess you didn't like them. That was a
big no no for me, since I keep thous clean
and don't want him or his friends messing it up.

(01:11:45):
But you guys would never mess anything up if you
listened to full episodes with stories just like this. Just
go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast app
which might be iHeartRadio as.

Speaker 1 (01:11:55):
Well, and search a bunky storytime. But there's a litttle
bit left of this story? Do you have any This
guy is a terrible roommate. Yea your brother so you know, coworker.

Speaker 2 (01:12:06):
If you take away the brotherness, it's like, yeah, take
the kid gloves off, just treat him like a normal guy.

Speaker 1 (01:12:12):
But let's finish the story.

Speaker 3 (01:12:14):
I ended up going no contact after that because I
didn't want to deal with any drama he might bring.
I also asked for my back pace since he obviously
had the money, but he never responded. So am I
the a hole for going no contact and not trusting him?

Speaker 1 (01:12:26):
Also?

Speaker 3 (01:12:27):
Should I discuss him and his friend's visiting if my
boyfriend doesn't like him?

Speaker 2 (01:12:30):
I think, Uh, if you go no contact, you should
make it explicitly clear why you don't just go no
contact like and don't explain explain why you're doing.

Speaker 1 (01:12:40):
It like, here's what you could do to fix it.
Here's what you could do to address You're part of
the equation. Here what seems like.

Speaker 3 (01:12:52):
And then he offered, you know, pretty reasonable boundaries for
the brother coming to visit, saying like hey, okay, you
can come visit, but these are.

Speaker 1 (01:13:00):
The rules, and you never responded. It's like, okay, you've
done You've done what you can

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I CUT OFF my long time friend because she made my wife uncomfortable…but my wife thinks I OVERREACTED! - r/AITAH | Reddit Stories

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}I CUT OFF my long time friend because she made my wife uncomfortable…but my wife thinks I OVERREACTED! - r/AITAH | Reddit Stories