June 12, 2025 • 47 mins
What’s the worst Father’s Day gift? Finding out you're NOT the father... or maybe it’s the best gift of all? 🤷♂️ This week on OK Storytime, we’re diving into jaw-dropping paternity twists and family confessions that’ll have you asking: is this REALLY my dad?
Truth bombs, DNA drama, and surprise endings you won’t see coming. 🎧💣
If you’re new here and looking for the story "DNA Test proves he is NOT the father… now I’m taking the inheritance!" Just click the link below.
You’re NOT The Father Week - DNA Test proves he is NOT the father… now I’m taking the inheritance! | Part 1
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00:00 r/relationships - My [26/F] mother [67/F] wants me to deal with my ex-fiance [27/M] who still lives with her- 3+ years after the fact.
23:59 r/relationships - My SO (31/M) asked my parents (70/M/F) for my (29/F) hand. They basically said no and now I am heartbroken. I don't know what to do.
Note: stories are sometimes abbreviated
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, this is Sam, this is John, and we are
the founding hosts of Okay Storytime Podcasts.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
And we have some foundational stories coming up for you.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
But the thing is, this foundation needs a little support
from these sponsors. So stick around two minutes and we'll
get into the episode.
Speaker 3 (00:16):
My parents chose my ex over me, but now they
want him gone.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Well there it goes. Sucks to suck.
Speaker 3 (00:25):
You bet on the wrong horse, all right, you should
have been on the horse you gave birth to. Several
years ago, when I was twenty one, I met this
quote unquote fantastic British boy on an online game. He
was in the process of finalizing his divorce from his
then wife. I was super respectful when I found out
the details of his relationship, even though it was coming
to an end. It wasn't until after they were officially
(00:47):
divorced and they had moved on that we began talking
a bit more seriously about their being and us. And
by the way, this comes from user postv And if
you want to submit your own stories, go to the
r slash Okay story I'm so bred it so and Sophia.
Just to get you up to speed, oh pe wants
a little Ish boy and know me all, and.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
He was fantastic. I'm yeah, we're so, we thought.
Speaker 3 (01:11):
After several months of video chatting, texting, and emails at work,
et cetera, we decided to meet up. I drove to
Florida to meet him, and everything felt like a fairy tale.
From then on, I honestly believed he was everything to me.
We moved in together after we started dating, and after
a few months of living together, he expressed wanting to
go home, which meant the UK. We worked things out
(01:33):
financially and we zipped off to England, where we lived with.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
His parents for a year. Wow okay dang. During that time,
he proposed his parents have got to be cool. To
live with them for a year and then there's no
frustration you like, it leads to you getting proposed parents
gotta be cool. I don't know. Maybe maybe they're not cool.
We'll find out.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Maybe they're like a hot maybe they're hot. Ooh okay.
During that time, he proposed I was over the moon.
I said yes, and then we had to have a
come to Jesus talk about our situation. In the end,
we moved back to the US to complete his permanent residency.
While living with my parents since he couldn't work at
the time. However, during all of this, I was very
(02:13):
blind to what was actually happening. In the beginning, his
ex wife had contacted me about how he cheated on her.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
And yeah, blah blah blah blah blah.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
Being the typical girl in a new relationship high I
figured she was just bitter and angry, and he perpetuated
that lie with stories about how she was crazy, you know,
the usual.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
You always got to be careful when people tell you
that their exes were crazy. Sometimes they were crazy, but
you gotta be like, why was she crazy? To give
me some examples of her crazy.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
Yeah, it's like the same thing as like someone who's
like every job they've ever had they ended up quitting because.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
Their boss sucked.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
Yeah, and it's like, well every job well, like really,
During the course of our relationship, there were a few
red flags that he was quick to have stories for,
Oh uh, this girl I'm chatting with.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Oh, she's an old friend and I'm just catching up.
I'm chatting with Chase. You gotta do the next. This
girl I'm shotting with.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
I can't do it.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Keep going. Of course, this was.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
A lie, among many others that I found out about
after the fact. The biggest lie he told me was
near the end of our relationship. I had a best
friend named Cynthia who he had gotten close to just
a few days before my birthday. He told me they
were heading out to the mall to buy me a gift,
you know, just a few hours and then he'd be back.
He didn't come home until five AM, when I was
(03:30):
waking up to get ready for work. He claimed the
car broke down on their way home from the mall
and they had to call our mutual friend Kim to
jumpstart the engine.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
And they never text to do any of that.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
Yeah, which, as is, we all know jump starting a
car takes nine hours.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
We all know that obvious lie. That was such an
obvious lie, just pathetic.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
Well, the mall closed at ten pm, and when I
spoke to him about it, she said she met up
with them just past eleven PM to help out, and
that they were very wasted and touchy. She said she
felt awkward the entire time and asked why I wasn't there.
She said they both claimed that they had asked me
to hang out, but I said no. Lo and behold
on my birthday. Neither of them had a gift for
me at that point.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Uh yeah, I'd be like, oh, what were you doing
for all of those hours from ten am to five am?
I got a gift for you?
Speaker 3 (04:22):
It's I got a it's a new girlfriend for me,
and I think we're gonna break up.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
I love you so much, Happy birthday. That's like twenty hours.
God did of like twenty hours? What were you doing
in the twenty hours? Her? Dang man.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
At that point, it was pretty obvious that something had happened,
and with previous evidence, I was finally done with his BS.
I gave him back the ring and informed my parents
that our relationship was over. Keep in mind, I confided
in my mother a lot growing up. We were very
close and I always went to her when I had
issues or was frustrated you about everything, and I mean everything.
(05:03):
I told my mother that I was contacting his parents
and I was arranging to buy his plane ticket back
home to the UK with my own money. As I
saw it, he had cheated on me and it was
time to have him move out so we could both
move on with our lives. At this time, I was
twenty two, nearing twenty three. I was very wrong about this.
My mother and my father decided to put their feet
(05:24):
down and told me that I brought him back to
America so we needed to sort our crap out. They
also refused to let him move into the guest bedroom.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
Wait what what?
Speaker 4 (05:33):
Wait?
Speaker 2 (05:34):
Wait? Your parents forced you to stay with them? What what? Wait?
Speaker 3 (05:39):
And they wouldn't even they wouldn't put him in the
guest bedroom.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
They were like, you have to live with him?
Speaker 3 (05:44):
They what made you share a bedroom with the guy
who had cheated on you on your birthday and didn't
get you a gift? Wow, I'm sleeping outside, dude. Yeah,
I'm going to I'm getting an RII membership, I'm buying
a tent. I'm sleeping outside, and then I'm returning to
return it.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Yeah, dude returns with ari I or nujob. She's great,
you know, And if I fall in love with the tent,
maybe I keep it. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
Anyways, for the next six months, I lived in hell.
He was verbally and emotionally abusive, didn't respect any of
my boundaries. I worked six am to four pm, and
he was constantly up until four or five am on
Skype with new girls and gaming buddies being super loud.
The list goes on and on. It was awful, just
take my word for it. On top of it all,
(06:30):
I was constantly arguing with my parents about it. They
saw absolutely nothing wrong with what was happening and that
we needed to be adults and work it out.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
I mean, so, I'm wondering right now because we don't
know were we kind of in all peace financial situations.
She's staying with her parents because they're saving money. Was
that it?
Speaker 3 (06:47):
Did?
Speaker 2 (06:47):
They say, yeah, it was.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
Just a situation where they're living with their parents in
this here, and you know, you can make the logical
leap if it's like they're twenty two, yeah, twenty three
living at home saving money.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Yeah, starting career. My advice for you, because I don't
think you can get through to him. You can't get
through your parents. Do so much research to find literally
anywhere else you can live.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Then yes, get out, you get out, and like, you know,
this is more for anyone who may find themselves in
a situation like this.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
Yeah, don't. It's just so the parents are being so absurd.
Speaker 3 (07:22):
I don't understand it, and I think if I was ope,
I would immediately be like, oh, so, okay, Mom, who
did you cheat on dad with while you were engaged?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Oh you didn't.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Dad. Who did you cheat on mom with when you
were engaged?
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Oh you didn't.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
Oh so neither. So you're both just talking right out
of your butts. Cool nice?
Speaker 2 (07:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
Yeah, So nothing changed until I finally had a nervous
breakdown and told them that if he didn't go, I
would move out and take my five hundred dollars in
rent and utilities elsewhere. Go.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
You're already paying rent. Oh you're already paying rent. Leave? Yes, yes,
just leave. Take take your five hundred dollars elsewhere. Yes. Please.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
They promptly agreed to let him move into the guest bedroom.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Why didn't we do that for the start? Why didn't
we do that six months ago? God?
Speaker 3 (08:07):
However, he refused to move into the other bedroom For
the next week and a half. I had to argue
with him about moving his things. I finally got sick
of it and moved his crap myself when he was
out on a date with Cynthia. We weren't friends anymore
at this point, obviously. Once he moved into the guest bedroom,
things were okay. I was able to lock myself away
in my room when I wasn't at work, and I
really just poured myself into my job and doing art
(08:28):
on the side for additional income. It was a crappy
situation to be in, but I was trying to make
it work. Unfortunately, it only got worse. It became clear
that my parents were choosing his side over mine.
Speaker 2 (08:38):
Boy, you know what this is. You guys aren't even
together and they're letting them live in their house. Oh.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
Sometimes, through no fault of their own, people are just
a sucker for a British accent.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
They're like, but darling, he's British. They just they just
she says here to me, like love, hello, love. They
hear him on the phone through the wall with Cynthia saying.
Speaker 5 (08:58):
Oh Cynthia, do you want to settle point? I can't
wait to show off your proper fit body everyone down
there at THEUSKI and they just go.
Speaker 3 (09:13):
Swoon, Oh my goodness, swoon. That's gonna be our son
in law. And it's not their fault. It's the British's fault.
It's the British for speaking so hot.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
Speak too hot man.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
Anyway, Kean is something to say.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Yeah, well, well you got something wrong with the British accent.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
Ke On, you have something wrong with the British, with
the Brits. You got a problem with Britz.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
I love a good Carlsberg. You don't even know what that.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
Is, Carlsburg. I know what a Carlsberg is. Yeah, what
is it? It's carls first of all. So it became
clear that my parents were choosing his side over mine.
He said a lot of nasty things about me to them,
and I got to hear about them through them in
a I can't believe you did this way. My mother
started leaving me nasty written letters under my door, and
(09:56):
whenever I would confront her, she would say everything she'd
written was true because my ex fiance had told her. Well, okay,
the British.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Man told me this was true.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
You would never lie to me, as you know that
it states clearly in the Magna Carta.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
A british Man must tell the truth. I have come
this so you can't lie to me.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
I reminded her that all of this information she was
getting was coming from the mouth of a lying cheater,
and she was going to take his word over mine.
Her own daughter. Well, that's exactly what she did. When
I had managed to save up enough money, I pieced
out and moved out without a dang word to anyone.
I had a friend several states away who was kind
enough to let me rent out their spare bedroom, and
(10:42):
that's what I rocked for a solid year before I
met my current boyfriend and moved in with him. I'm
in a happy, solid place in my life and I'm
almost to one to seven eo.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
Ages.
Speaker 3 (10:55):
My ex fiance still lives within my parents after five years.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
That's so funny. That's so funny, and they deserve it
so much. Oh my goodness. Imagine being like you're telling
your friends or your new partner and they're like, you're
talking about exes and stuff, and you say, yeah, you know,
I had a really terrible experience with my last X.
He lives with my parents. And they were like, oh,
he lives with his parents. No, no, no, he lives
(11:22):
with my parents still five years later.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Yeah, he cheated on me on my birthday and then
he moved you with my parents and they like him
more as what absurd? What that's actually one of the
craziest things.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
Yeah, yeah, that they could have done.
Speaker 3 (11:39):
So my ex fiance still lives with my parents in
the time after we broke up until I moved out.
He didn't have a job and thus didn't pay rent
or anything else.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
That's insane. Me out here went to school. I'm sorry,
is he doing it? He britished so hard that they
were like, you don't have to you don't have to
pay for anything. You can to stay in the room.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
What would that accent actually have to sound like?
Speaker 6 (12:03):
What if he just maybe he's an was Maybe he
was Jason Staither, He's I'm the transporter and the people
transport and then he just goes outside and he watches
clips from the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. Maybe he
comes back in eight hours later and he says, oh,
that was a long day at work, and they're like, oh,
(12:24):
he's so mister, that was.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
A long day at work. With that with.
Speaker 6 (12:28):
Chelsea, Oh she's gorgeous, cheat on her, cheat with her
any day of the week.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
I'm a sucker for a lady with the name of
his name Cynthia. That one didn't sound like just state
then that was just I don't know how to do
a step and ales and so I'm just doing it
to a British transporter.
Speaker 6 (12:44):
Transport transport transport on the transport all right, that one
was bad too.
Speaker 3 (12:50):
Okay, So this jobless, penniless British man is living with
Ope's parents.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
Yeah, and he's providing a service however British.
Speaker 3 (12:59):
However, he did complete his permanent residency and is now
allowed to work. After I moved out, I didn't speak
to my parents unless it was absolutely required. I called
on Christmas, New Year's, Mother's Day, et cetera. I didn't
give my parents my address, though. I was fine with
cutting all ties with my family since it was clear
they were going to support my jack butt lazy ex fiance.
(13:21):
So that was just over three years ago. Yes, he
still lives with them. Over time, my relationship with my
mom got a bit better, but she's never apologized for
what happened. That's okay. I don't expect one from her,
but I won't make her a priority in my life.
The other day, I got a random Facebook message from
my ex fiance's mother asking me to message him because
(13:42):
he had a question for me. I was hesitant at first,
but unblocked him on Facebook and I asked him what
was up. He asked me about my TV and my
papaison chair. What the heck is a papaison chair?
Speaker 2 (13:53):
It's I think it's what I have, like a nest,
like a pillow nest chair.
Speaker 3 (13:59):
I believe it's But how do you pronounce as.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Papasa papasanan papasa sandude?
Speaker 3 (14:08):
When we were living with my parents, I bought both
of these things, and when I moved out, I left
them behind because I didn't have room in my car.
I refused to make a second trip out of fear
of dealing with him or my family. He said, since
he had been using them since I left, he just
wanted to ask if he could take them since he
was moving out of my parents' house and into his
own place.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
I said I didn't care.
Speaker 3 (14:28):
Honestly, I wasn't going to be getting those things back,
and I really did not give two crabs if he
took them without my permission.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
That was the extent of our conversation.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
Girl, If you don't tell this dude, he needs to
pay you for taking your belongings.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
Yeah, I'm mad at you. Now you get that money, man,
say yeah, I'll take all your money please. Yeah. Sure
you can have it for a price that I will determine. Yeah,
otherwise I'm selling it on Facebook market Place. Yeah, what,
which is where I'll be finding my next roommate.
Speaker 3 (14:53):
Yeah and if yeah, and if you want money, you
can sell it on Facebook Marketplace and I'll give you
a commission.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
For God's sakes, give this man n nothing. He's taking your.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
Parent He's taking your parents. They couldn't have been that
good person. It's again the British accent. It's not their fault,
which we're joking.
Speaker 3 (15:09):
But a few hours later I got an angry phone
call from my mother asking why in the heck would
I give him permission to take the TV in the chair?
I said, to be honest, I didn't give a dang.
I hadn't seen either of those things in over three years,
and I wasn't that god dang attached to them if
he was going to use them.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
So what.
Speaker 3 (15:26):
That's not like I was going to get any use
out of them anyway. So then she went on a
tirade about how he hasn't been paying rent since May
and that he's knocked up Cynthia but left her for
another girl. Oh shocking.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
Uh, dude, I don't feel bad for these pairs one bit.
I'm sorry Bisey Chef says, why that would they give
him permission to continue to live in their house because
there's a sucker for a British accent.
Speaker 3 (15:52):
It's just all around absurd. I agreed on so many
different levels.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Greed.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
I just absurd that the mom has to go all
to complain about the ex fiance to her daughter that
she abandoned over this guy.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
Her daughter said, please kick him out. We he has
to go, and they said no.
Speaker 3 (16:10):
Like yeah, they said, no, you're actually a failure because
you're abandoning your marriage that hasn't happened yet, but you
brought him to the States, so it's like you've essentially
signed the contract.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
H yeah.
Speaker 3 (16:22):
Yeah, So so he's not paying rent. He got Cynthia pregnant.
His room is an episode of Hoarders gone wrong. Blah
blah blah blah blah blah blah. Also, while my mother
was in the nursing home she has failing health, and
my dad was visiting my ex through a huge party
that my uncle came home to.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
Oh I thought I misread that as came to.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
Yeah, your uncle, my uncle showed up and that really
was ooh bad because my uncle goes way too far
at the party, oh lord, my uncle comes over to
make sure the house is okay while my mom's in
the hospital or the nursing home when she has really
bad episodes. I spoke to him and he said it
was close to forty to fifty people who trashed the house.
The list of you know, malfeasans goes on and on.
(17:05):
My mother then told me I had to deal with
my ex fiance since it was originally my idea to
bring him around.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
And I'd say, no, my, what are their heads full
of rocks? These You don't have to let him stay there.
I don't understand why they don't just.
Speaker 3 (17:19):
Say, Lee, is your mom in the hospital because she
did the experimental procedure where they replace her brain with
a freaking boulder.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
What's going on? What's happening? Rock surgery? Yea on, what's happening?
Everyone wants to know what's happening, what's gone? Because if
someone's in your house and they're not pano any rent,
and they're not bathing.
Speaker 4 (17:38):
Themselves, you just say, hey, get out of my house, okay.
Apparently she and my father had been trying to get
him out for months, but he either wasn't listening or
said he would move out by a certain date and
then never would. I told her to call the police
and have him forcibly removed, since it's their house and
if they're removing him, they can escort him out and
watch as he takes his things. She said, no, that
(18:00):
wouldn't do, and that I needed to handle this situation.
Oh that's it.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
Uh bye, hang up. There are so many times in
this phone call that I'd be hanging up.
Speaker 3 (18:09):
This is when I absolutely lost it. I reminded her
of all the bs I had to go through with
him and her, and how in the end both she
and my father supported him and his words over me.
They paid for everything he needed, such as clothes and
little death sticks. Those aren't cheap. Centered to cater to
every need like he was their little baby. Yet if
(18:32):
I was a day late on my rent because I
was waiting for payday, oh no, throw me in the
lake of fire. I'm an irredeemable monster. I reminded her
that he had cheated on me, and when I made
it clear our relationship was over, they refused to let
him move out of the house, much less my room,
until I finally snapped and threatened to move out. I
reminded her of every letter she slipped under my door,
(18:53):
every nasty insult she flung my way because he had
lied to her. Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.
I said, no, I'm not helping. She made her decision
when she chose him over me, and she needs to
stick to it and get him out of the house
if that's what she truly wanted. Now, it sucked getting
that rude with my mother, but she had to know
where I stood and the position she was trying to
(19:14):
place me in. We however, however, however, it's not.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
As easy as that, dang it. Now.
Speaker 3 (19:22):
My mother is very sick. She is constantly in and
out of the hospital with heart and lung issues. She
lives on an oxygen tank now, and any amount of
stress can trigger a whole slew of issues. Her doctors
have warned her multiple times that stress could give her
a stroke. I've already lost my grandmother to a stroke,
so I don't want my mother to go the same way.
A part of me feels responsible for the situation, since
(19:44):
I don't want my mother to have to put up
with him. After my conversation with my mother, I sent
my ex fiance another message. I told him that after
speaking to my mother, I wasn't comfortable with him taking anything,
including the TV or chair. I said those things were
to remain where they are and he is not allowed
to take them. I said this was my first and
last message to him regarding the issue, and to resolve
this as peacefully as possible with my parents. They deserve
(20:07):
that much to be safe. I screenshotted the message and
sent it to my mother as well, and then blocked
him on Facebook again.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
So my question is did I handle this the right way?
Speaker 3 (20:14):
I feel incredibly bad that I don't want to do
anything more for my parents, but at the same time,
I also feel that they made their bed and have
to lie in it now. If anyone else has gone
through something similar, what would you do? Should I call
the police for them? Should I make a visit?
Speaker 2 (20:26):
What are they? Your kids? Your parents? Your mom might
not be doing well, but your dad seems fine. He
can handle it.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
Yeah, where's dad? Here's the solution right here? Mom goes
and spends an afternoon with a friend if she has one,
and Dad calls the cops and they forcibly remove your terrible.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
Ex from the house. We love it solution. Mom doesn't
have to deal with any of the stress. Nothing. He's gone.
Speaker 3 (20:50):
Yeah, the day is saved. Yeah, and you don't have
to be involved. So what do I do? Should I
make a visit? I'm at a loss since I feel
I've done enough but not enough, if that makes any
sense whatsoever. Any helper advice is much appreciated. Thank you
so much. And hey, by the way, we would thank
you so much if you listened to full episodes with
stories just like this on Spotify or Apple podcasts or
(21:12):
iHeartRadio or wherever you beautiful people listen to podcasts just
search Okay, storytime and uh, you've got the whole world
in your hands. You've got oh Mal, I need more.
I've used that one. You've got the kit in Kaboodle
I've used I've used that one too.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
I've got the Keys to the Kingdom. That's a new one.
I haven't used that one yet. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
Sure, you've got the touch, You've got the power.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Got a girl, Come boy, Why didn't they legally evict
that leach? Because they're silly.
Speaker 3 (21:45):
They're silly, I mean, and depending on where you are,
like sometimes, you know, I think California has recently changed
like squatter's rights or oh yeah, if he.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
Was there for five years, he might have some kind
of say over.
Speaker 3 (21:55):
But if you're not paying rent, you know, yeah, and
California did recently, I think change a lot of that
to where it's it's basically a more streamline process. But anyway,
but regardless, Yeah, your parents sort of made their bad dude,
so it's not your fault that they're laying in it now.
It's unfortunate that your mom has health problems. Like of course,
you you know, you're not a demon, like you're not
wishing that upon your mom. But you know what, I've
(22:16):
said it before, I'll say it again. When we have
health problems. When you have health complications, the responsibility of
dealing with that lives upon you, you know.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
And also you know, like if you'll like, this kind
of goes into parents who are old and expect their
kids to take care of them. If you didn't treat
your kids well when they were children or throughout their life,
you can't really expect them to want to take care
of you when you're old and need taken care of.
So treat your family members well and then you'll get
someone to take care of you when you're old.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Yes, ma'am. Yeah, dad should be doing this. Looking at
some comments here, says Amulin says legal eviction would mess
with his immigration status to yes, Yeah, let's finish this story. Yeah,
there's an edit. Thank you everyone who has responded to this.
I didn't expect this post to absolutely explode. With some
amazing advice and some harsh realizations and great support. I've
(23:05):
tried to respond to everything I could, and I've read
every single comment that's been made so far.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
You guys are amazing.
Speaker 3 (23:10):
I think I've gotten everything I need from this thread,
but I will continue to read and comment on anything
new if I can. I can't say that there will
be an update, but should I find out anything of worth,
I'll be sure to post that in the future. And
that is the end against story. Yeah, your dad opied
needs to be. If your mom is like to the
point where stress can give her a stroke, and they
literally exiled you in favor of the man who cheated
(23:31):
on you on your birthday, they can go ahead and
navigate that themselves.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
They're agreed, all grown adults, man, And.
Speaker 3 (23:40):
If you know they can't figure out how to go,
you know, day by day without giving your mom a
stroke after being told what to do by the doctors
to prevent it.
Speaker 2 (23:48):
In no way on you. Nope, not at all.
Speaker 3 (23:50):
So yeah, that's the end of that story. Oh lord,
you got another one, though.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
We have another one. We go, we got another one.
But let's get to this next story. My parents disapprove
of my boyfriend, especially when he asked for my hand. Well,
he's already got two of them. My s O and
I have been together for about four years and I've
been living together since May. We have just moved across
the state to finish our degrees so as to be
(24:14):
more employable. So O and I decided that after our
first semester, if we had pulled grades and proven to
ourselves that we could be responsible, we would talk about
getting engaged. We both love each other very much and
know that we want to be together.
Speaker 3 (24:28):
I just get to really quickly point out that that's
my favorite way getting Like the reasoning forgetting a degree
has been described. Yeah, for the purposes of being more employable, eloyable.
Speaker 2 (24:38):
However they said it. Oh, I didn't say it right,
but it was. It was funny. By the way, this
comes from don't hate mass Kate and if you want
to submit your own stories, go to the r slash
Okay storytime severed it.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
So I have to be that guy and say do
we all know what that means? Yes to Chew, you
didn't give keyon time to not.
Speaker 2 (24:53):
This past semester, we both made the Dean's List and
had our engagement talk. We decided that we do want
to get ma and want to take the next step.
He called his parents and told them he'd be asking
me to marry him, and they were very happy. I
am extremely close with my family. My family has had
reservations about so since we began dating. When s O
and I first met, he worked and lived at a hotel.
(25:16):
I worked and lived in my own apartment. We both
did not have bachelor degrees to my parents. At twenty seven,
Soo had no prospects as he had no degree and
was not in school, lived in a hotel, and barely
made any money. After about a year of us dating,
I lost my job and had to move home. I
decided that I wanted to go back to school to
finish my degree. So So was someone I could see
(25:37):
myself with for a very long time, and I knew
that in order to be able to do the things
I wanted, get married, have a family, support myself financially.
I needed to have a degree. SOO agreed that he
should also go back to school for the same reasons.
I just want to say, you always go to trade school.
Speaker 3 (25:53):
Saw such a people who have plumbing businesses make a
lot of money.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
But you had to.
Speaker 3 (25:58):
Crawl under how life every one wants to be a plumber.
I couldn't be a plumber because I'm so scared of bugs.
Speaker 2 (26:03):
That's true. He decided on and associates in it. He
pulled straight a's and ifter around with these and c's.
My parents were happy that he was going back to
school and understood that it was a lucrative field. They
weren't too ecstatic about the associates, but knew that he
didn't need a full B bachelor's for it. Last year,
so and I had a discussion about our degrees. He
was taking two classes and I could only afford one
(26:25):
online at a time. We both agree that being full
time students was what we wanted and began working towards that.
In August, we moved across the state to attend university
full time. Now that we're here, we live off of
financial aid, SOO could only take three classes because he
did not get as much financial aid as I did
and we couldn't afford for him to take another class.
(26:45):
I feel like this is a sacrifice he has made
for us. My parents see it as he's only taking
three classes because of his extra time. They believe he
should get a job. Our first semester, we both thought
that we did not need extra money. We did not
budget well, and by dec we were basically broke. We
used holiday money and a two hundred dollars loan for
my parents to get by until our loans came in
(27:07):
For the next semester. I found a job that is
not the greatest fit for me physically, but I'm willing
to do it so we have a cushion for the
summer when we do not get financial aid.
Speaker 3 (27:16):
Their job is being uh the practice partner for like
a WWE wrestler.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Yeah, they're like, it's not it's not great. It does hurt.
The word body is taxing, but it pays all right.
I take four classes and VP of my academic club.
I put a lot of time effort into my club
because I truly enjoy it. Just got offered an internship
and have a weekend job that I have not started yet.
I've also applied to other student jobs. He takes three classes,
(27:43):
takes care of all of the household duties except cooking,
which I enjoy, and hangs out on the internet. To
my parents, my esso is a lazy, unmotivated f.
Speaker 3 (27:51):
Up that doesn't we lost Oh no, oh, yeah, no,
I mean both uh oh uh oh? And also am
I gonna sit like this now?
Speaker 2 (28:03):
My back was starting to hurt? Oh boy. To my parents,
myso is a lazy, unmotivated f up. Apparently he has
no spark when he talks about his education. He does
not love it, but knows he can make a living,
and they think he just goes with the motions. They
also think his personality is annoying. He's boisterous hipster type
(28:24):
that do those line up? Type? Those?
Speaker 3 (28:27):
Those are usually boisterous hipsters.
Speaker 2 (28:29):
Yeah, what is a boisterous hipster like?
Speaker 3 (28:31):
Yeah, Steven Tyler, I.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
Am a go getter. He is not. They do have
a point about him needing to get a job with
three classes. He does have the time to work, and
we need the money. I should not be the only
one working, especially because I have a lot on my plate.
I s agrees, but has low self esteem via employment,
as he only really delivered pizzas and worked as a telemarketer.
(28:53):
Wait what, I'm sorry he has low self esteem about employment.
He's like, oh, well, I just couldn't get a so
I'm not going to even try. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:03):
I mean that's like, uh, you maybe you miss one
of the shots you don't take. You strike out one
hundred percent of the at bats you don't swing.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
I understand why your parents wouldn't be cool with that.
Jobs are also very hard to come by in our
small rural town. I feel he needs to push his
feelings of inadequacy out of the way and just try
for jobs no matter what. Yeah, that's kind of life
advice for anyone.
Speaker 3 (29:25):
Yeah, dude, you can literally h Have you heard I
literally just talked about Steven Tyler. Have you ever heard
about fake it till you make it? Literally just show
up and be like. I got a job and figured out.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
So So called my parents two days ago to ask
for my dad's blessing on our engagements. My dad said
yes to so So, but I found out later that
he only agreed because he felt blindsided and thought, how
could I say no, my dad is against us getting
married for the time being until SOO can prove that
he can be a provider. Honestly not fully disagree with
(29:55):
the parents. I get where they're coming from. They're saying
they want this guy who supposedly got to be marrying
their daughter to have money.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
Yeah, perfectly reasonable to be well, we don't want him
to just be doing pizza delivery. Yeah, right, right now.
Speaker 2 (30:12):
He doesn't even have a job. That's the thing. He
has zero job and he's taking three classes. That is
the thing. Like, dude, I was taking five to six
classes and I had a job, and I was doing
like shows, you can get a job. My mom wants
me to meet someone else. I understand where my dad
is coming from. I truly do. But in my mind,
so SO and I going back to school was proof
(30:33):
that s SO was serious about getting his life on track. Yes,
but good job, good job just needs more time. Just like,
don't just don't rush into this.
Speaker 3 (30:40):
He just needs more Yeah, don't get more gathering of information.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
After his degree, he would be able to get a
job in his field. You will probably end up making
more money than I will in my field. I know,
we cannot survive on love alone. Love does not pay
the bills. My SO is my best friend. He has
been with me through some very tough times. He takes
care of me. I suffer from anxiety and can feel
panicky at times. He supports all of my endeavors and
(31:06):
is always happy to lend a hand. He dressed up
like a Disney character for one of my club events
and took pictures with the kids from the community for
two days. He pushes me to do well as I
can sometimes fall into a procrastination spiral, and he does
everything around the house. Emotionally, he is everything I have
ever wanted in a partner. We respect each other and
are able to talk out our problems. We have healthy,
(31:27):
spicy sleep life, and find each other both physically and
spicy relatedly attractive. This is not to say we don't fight,
but we are careful when we do. I am heartbroken
that my parents basically said no. I am offended by
some of the things my mom said. Thinking about our
engagement had filled me with such excitement and love for MYESO,
and now when I think about it, I cry because
(31:49):
I'm so disappointed that my parents do not support us.
I mean, prove them wrong. You know, you could still
get married even without like, obviously it would be nice
to out their approval, but you could just be like, hey,
you know, bro, we'll be doing fine and then hopefully
they'll come around. Yeah, I mean, I mean it sucks.
Speaker 3 (32:05):
There's more to a partnership than financial security or you know.
It sounds like, you know, it sounds like you all
have a pretty solid thing going on. But yeah, with uh,
maybe that just means you aren't just ready to make
that move yet.
Speaker 2 (32:18):
There's just no need to. Don't rush. It's like it's
not like rush's.
Speaker 3 (32:22):
Over, you know, and you don't need their approval at
the end of the day, it doesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
That's my point. It's like maybe once you you know,
are successful and stuff, they'll they'll realize.
Speaker 3 (32:30):
But also it doesn't really matter what they think anytime.
It's just about money too. It's like it's like, so,
what if I married a doctor and he was just
like the worst, the worst person ever.
Speaker 2 (32:38):
Yeah, they are only thinking about money. And again, like
to an extent, I see where they're coming from. But also, again,
you can get married if you want to. Doesn't they
don't you know, they're not officiating. They don't have to
say yes.
Speaker 3 (32:51):
Yeah, it's true, you're you're getting married, not your parents.
But quick pause here for uh remembers. Chiliba is popping off.
They got a phone call that their cousin pass away
and there will be here tomorrow. Heartsit chat. Yeah please,
and I'm so sorry about that.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
I'd be good luck. Yeah, thoughts with your thoughts with
you and with your family. But we're going to keep
reading and I hope that you know we'll be here
for when you get back. Yes. So and I had
a long talk last night. He agrees he needs to
get a job. He has applied to what he can
in our area and says he'll keep looking until something
sticks good. I feel like even if he does this,
it will not be good enough for my parents, maybe
(33:27):
that it won't be And then you know, you're like,
even like he is applying now and they don't even care.
It's like, Okay, I want to marry this man. How
can I continue with an engagement when no one will
be happy for us? I know that all that matters
is us, but it means a lot to me what
my family thinks. They're not fans of his. I do
not know if this will change. Ours is the healthiest
(33:48):
relationship I've ever been in, but no one seems to
notice that I'm not a loss. And there is an update.
Speaker 1 (33:53):
Hey Sam, we're going to get back to the stories.
But here's three minutes of bads from our sponsors.
Speaker 3 (33:57):
And the only thing that's not healthy is the uh
the wallet.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Yeah yeah, look, and he's he's already said he's gonna
get a job. And that's you know, that was my
only critique. All you can do is enjoy what.
Speaker 3 (34:10):
You have, and like you said, it's like it doesn't
matter what other people think. Yeah, of course you're gonna care
what your parents have to say.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
But if your parents truly love you, which I hope
that they do, and care about you, then they will
see as this relationship continues that he loves and supports
you and is trying to better himself for your relationship,
and they'll and they'll come on board. But you know,
right now, they're not really looking at the intricacies of
your relationship.
Speaker 3 (34:33):
Only two people on earth who really need to be
excited about you getting engaged are you and your partner
dingis Bot who is OPI Come on, dingus, come on,
come on, dingus.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
Failure dingis, but there is an update. The first few
weeks after all this happened, my s O and I
were in a serious depressed bunk. This all hit me
harder than anyone for obvious reasons, and I started my
semester off pretty crappy, which is and good. I spoke
with my parents a lot after the initial sadness or off.
(35:05):
My dad stayed true to what he said that he
had my best interest in mind and was worried about
my financial future. My mom's apologies were half hearted, but
we eventually got to a place of understanding. My s
remained hurt, humiliated, and angry for a while. He is
still hurt and angry, but he's been able to deal
with his feelings better as time has gone on. We
went back to couples counseling and that was really helpful.
(35:27):
He also started seeing a psychiatrist his idea and has
been taking antidepressants. I am really proud of him, as
he comes from a family that does not believe mental
health is a thing. My s O and I have
both agreed to put off our engagement until we had
some savings in our bank account. That's just like smart thinking. Bizzah.
We got there and things were more stable, both financially
(35:48):
and emotionally between our families. He has been looking for work,
but he has not been able to gain employment just yet. I,
on the other hand, found a job and am working
as a social media manager at a consulting firm. Mom
and dad called us a few weeks ago to let
us know that they wanted to start over with MYSOH.
This is all looking good. We're on the right track.
They want to let go of the past and just
(36:10):
move forward. They love me and to have my back,
but also understand that I love myso and that we
have a very solid relationship. They do not want to
be the reason and we break up if that were
to happen. My dad called my SOO and apologized for
the conversation they had when my ESSO asked him to
marry me. My dad felt bad about the situation and
let MYSO know that he is hopeful that we are
(36:31):
on our way to becoming financially secure and happy coming
out of us. I respect my parents a lot. I
am not happy with their feelings towards MYESO, but I
am happy that they love me enough to bring their
concerns to me, but respect my decisions. I'm also happy
that my ESSO took this as a little hitting rock
bottom his words the situation and has now been getting
(36:51):
stuff in order to work love. I think that's pretty
much it for now. Nothing is one hundred percent and
it's not like this is all puppies and rainbows. But
things are better and I've settled down. I really like
my new job and hope that MYSO will be able
to find employment soon. If not now, then definitely over
the summer when a lot of the students go home
for break again. Thank you so much for all the help.
(37:13):
Reddit can be a really awesome place. And there is
a second update. We're on the right track. We are
on the right track and we love to see it.
Things are happening, things are balls rolling up. We love it.
Speaker 3 (37:24):
Update's going to be we make a million dollars a
year and we have seven children and we are all
doing great.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Badpool Girl says, yay, sounds like dad straight mom out. Yeah,
it does sound like, you know, they had a really
good talk and she was like, you know what I was,
I was reacting pretty harshly, And again, it does seem
like it's coming from a place of truth, like caring
about you and wanting you to have a financially stable life.
But it was just misguided and much.
Speaker 3 (37:52):
Like we are never cluding fully into any given situation
we read about. Your parents probably aren't fully clued in
to you know, everything, But they just see this guy
who doesn't make any money.
Speaker 2 (38:04):
Wants to wait, and now they're gonna get engaged.
Speaker 3 (38:06):
Yeah, I worry for you.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
I am worried. But there is a second update, so
this will be the last update to refresh my s oh,
I'll call him. Brad and I were keen on getting engaged.
He called my dad to get the okay and blah
blah blah, YadA, YadA YadA.
Speaker 3 (38:21):
Didn't sound like a Brad. That sounded more like a Flad.
Speaker 2 (38:24):
The way you said that. Brad fled. Since my last update,
I have been employed by the same company since March. Congrats.
I love my job. I am working in my field
and I am very appreciated at work. Brad barely searched
for work.
Speaker 3 (38:39):
Oh no, no, no, no no no no no no no
no no no.
Speaker 2 (38:42):
The ball's rolling down the hill. The ball is sissifus.
Speaker 3 (38:47):
No.
Speaker 4 (38:50):
No.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
He had two interviews in the time between then and
now January to July, he only had two interviews in
six January to July. Your parents were right.
Speaker 3 (39:02):
Maybe he's like, I'm only interviewing for positions. I feel
like I'm really worthy of as as someone with what
pizza delivery experience and telemarketing super rough When your parents
gonna go, I told you so, I'm only applying for
CEO positions and never gained employment.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
Throughout these past few months, Brad and I have been
fighting a lot. I try to be supportive of his
search for a job, which he lied to me about
he never truly looked too hard, and of a schoolwork.
He got straight a's again. In late March, my mom
was diagnosed with stage three cancer. Oh. Brad was an
okay support but it was hard for him as he
really dislikes all members of my family. Brad, I was
(39:41):
rooting for you, man, I was rooting for you, and
you're letting me down. By the end of the semester,
I was nagging Brad a lot about finding a job.
By this time, we actually needed the money, as our
student loans would run out and what I make at
my job isn't enough to support two people, like I said,
and he admits this. He barely looked for work. He
ran out of money, and I began to support us
both on whatever was left of my student loans, my
(40:03):
tax return, and what I made at my job. He
spent his last cash on Devil's lettuce and T shirts. Wow,
this guy sucks. He began smoking Devil's lettuce all day
every day. We began to move further away from each other.
Two weeks ago, my dad passed away due to complications
from surgery. I am heartbroken and functioning okay, but very
(40:24):
overwhelmed that my dad passed away suddenly and my mom
began chemo last week. My family is just I don't know,
we're pulling together. What a freaking turn. This story was
going so well.
Speaker 3 (40:35):
I mean in a way now that now you should
know that this is not someone you want to marry,
or that you're not ready to marry, or he's not
ready to in the moment where he needs to step
up the hardest.
Speaker 2 (40:46):
He is now fully gone to sleep. At the time
of my dad's death, Brad was just not emotionally available.
He was of no support to me. At my dad Shiva,
Brad was incredibly rude to my family and myself. I
barely spoke to him the rest of the time I
was back home. When we both got back into town,
I broke up with him. Yeah yeah, yeah, yep. We
(41:07):
are currently living in the same house until my apartment
is ready in August. He wants to stay friends.
Speaker 3 (41:12):
Why Why would I want to be friends with someone
like you?
Speaker 2 (41:15):
Why would I want to be friends with someone who
doesn't support me when my parent passes away? Why would
want that? Oh?
Speaker 3 (41:20):
Things are reading hard. I've become emotionally unavailable. Sorry about
that bad friend.
Speaker 2 (41:24):
He wants to say, friends, I'm not sure what I want.
I think you are I don't I think you know
what you want. At this moment, he is out buying
Devil's let us with our friend while I wait at
our house for his parents to come as they're visiting
for the next few days. His priority is are super aft.
I am happy to moving into my new place and
to start the next chapter of my life. I just
(41:45):
wish my dad was here to see it. And there
is a nine year update.
Speaker 1 (41:49):
Hey it's Sam. We're going to get back to these stories.
But here's three minutes of ads for our sponsors.
Speaker 2 (41:54):
There's a nine year update of folks, and I'm really
open that it's. Oh he's super happy and married and
has is rich. Yeah, wow, this guy sucks.
Speaker 3 (42:03):
Okay, so they're gonna be like, so remember that guy
who abandoned me. They're like, he came up with an
app and it made seventy eight trillion dollars. Yeah, you're
something like He'll be like, it's just gonna just be
another switch to root.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
But yes, correct move. I don't know.
Speaker 3 (42:21):
You break up if you can't swallow your own crap
at someone's funeral.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
Ridiculous to everyone there. Be respectful at a funeral, Dude,
it's your partner's dead.
Speaker 3 (42:32):
Come on you and you're what, Yeah, I just don't go.
Speaker 2 (42:36):
Just don't go. If you're gonna be respectful, I'm.
Speaker 3 (42:38):
Gonna be angsty in like a I look, there's just
nothing left to be said.
Speaker 2 (42:43):
No, Miss jay Bird says ex's a loser. Parents clocked it.
Sometimes your parents are right? Did you just smell it them?
Nine years later, it's been nine years since I wrote
those updates. I reread them today and I just cried
at all the comments saying how wonderful my dad was
and now my parents were looking out for me. They were,
They absolutely were. Soon after my dad passed away, my
(43:05):
mom followed about eighteen months later. Oh so sorry, Opete.
I left my university city and moved home to take
care of her. My family was with her when she passed.
We were so lucky to have been there together. After
Brad and I broke up, we stayed friends for a
while and he turned out to be a better friend
than boyfriend for a bit. He moved away and I
moved back home to take care of my mom. I
(43:26):
met a guy about a month after I moved home,
I'll call Frank. Frank and I dated for a few years,
and during that time Brad moved home. We hung out
once or twice, but it felt awkward, so I distanced
myself a little. The nail in Brad's coffin was when
his mom had an accident and passed away, and he
said a lot of nasty things to me.
Speaker 3 (43:43):
Ah.
Speaker 2 (43:44):
I know it was the grief talking, but I just
didn't want to be his friend anymore and deal with
his mood swings. Frank and my relationship blossomed. He was
such a huge support when my mom passed away and
took such great care of me. He's like no one
I had ever been with. We moved in together, and
then we got engaged and married. We'll be married three
years soon. We bought a house. We've been together for
seven years. Sometimes you know, you have to go through
(44:07):
a couple of frogs to buy in your.
Speaker 3 (44:08):
Prints, and sometimes your prince is a frog disguised as
a frog.
Speaker 2 (44:12):
And sometimes you can find full episodes of stories just
like this if you go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or
iHeartRadio and search of Pokes story time. There is a
teensy bit left to this story, and I think we've
said all that. We've got to say. The caffeine's making
my eyeballs. I have to be so bad. Yeah, we're
gonna hit this story.
Speaker 3 (44:31):
I think we all simultaneously just do the moment of like.
Speaker 2 (44:36):
As SI at the beginning of this story, I've been dying,
so I got to finish the story up. Frank and
my siblings get along so well. We all hang out
all the time, and it's so nice to have my
family around all the time. Again, I know my parents
would have loved Frank. He is so kind and loving
and funny too. My friends and family adore him. I
feel lucky to have come through such heartbreak. Things aren't perfect,
(44:56):
are they ever? And I deal with my grief every day,
but I have so many loving people around me that
show me they care, and I feel happy most days.
I miss my mom and dad so much. I'm just
grateful for the love they gave me when they were here.
And that is the end of that story and the
end of the episode and the end of that episode. Ah,
(45:17):
that's not quite the stay here, and we have to
speak your final life thoughts. Findal thoughts to anyone out
there whose family members are critical of your partner, Just
just take a minute, take a minute, listen to what
they're saying, and try and see if you can parse out.
Is there criticism coming from a place of genuine love
(45:41):
and care for you and like slight worry or is
it coming from a place of night and I'm critical
of everything that you ever done and I hate everyone
you ever bring home from you know, is it coming
from that or they're just a little bit worried because
oh maybe we have a little bit more live experience
for you know, than you, because we're older than you
and we send that you know, maybe maybe you guys
(46:02):
are not ready for this.
Speaker 3 (46:03):
Nobody in this life has a crystal ball that tells
them the future, but sometimes people have gone through things
that afford them more insight to given the situation, and.
Speaker 2 (46:13):
You can, you know, before you immediately write it all off,
take a minute, you know, listen to the advice, and
then try and decide does this advice supply.
Speaker 3 (46:22):
Or no based on where he ended up going with
his behavior. I feel like there were probably some pretty.
Speaker 2 (46:29):
Like pretty big.
Speaker 3 (46:30):
I mean, he could have obvious red flags.
Speaker 2 (46:32):
He was taking three classes and living off of Ope's
money and alone, So you know, would this be considered
a happy ending? I think so he's living. I mean,
obviously we've got a lot of hardship in her life,
but you know, most like very few people live life
without any hardship. And she got she got, you know,
she got love from it in the end. So I
(46:55):
think that's as happy as it could be. But very
very very sorry for your kids. I don't know, I
don't think so, I don't that I know of. Samantha
Ali says when parents say things like that, it's usually
because they have life experience and are sometimes right. But that, folks,
is the end of that story. And the end of
this episode, so if you love us, make sure to subscribe.
(47:15):
We love you and sitema
Hey, this is Sam, this is John, and we are
the founding hosts of Okay Storytime Podcasts.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
And we have some foundational stories coming up for you.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
But the thing is, this foundation needs a little support
from these sponsors. So stick around two minutes and we'll
get into the episode.
Speaker 3 (00:16):
My parents chose my ex over me, but now they
want him gone.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Well there it goes. Sucks to suck.
Speaker 3 (00:25):
You bet on the wrong horse, all right, you should
have been on the horse you gave birth to. Several
years ago, when I was twenty one, I met this
quote unquote fantastic British boy on an online game. He
was in the process of finalizing his divorce from his
then wife. I was super respectful when I found out
the details of his relationship, even though it was coming
to an end. It wasn't until after they were officially
(00:47):
divorced and they had moved on that we began talking
a bit more seriously about their being and us. And
by the way, this comes from user postv And if
you want to submit your own stories, go to the
r slash Okay story I'm so bred it so and Sophia.
Just to get you up to speed, oh pe wants
a little Ish boy and know me all, and.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
He was fantastic. I'm yeah, we're so, we thought.
Speaker 3 (01:11):
After several months of video chatting, texting, and emails at work,
et cetera, we decided to meet up. I drove to
Florida to meet him, and everything felt like a fairy tale.
From then on, I honestly believed he was everything to me.
We moved in together after we started dating, and after
a few months of living together, he expressed wanting to
go home, which meant the UK. We worked things out
(01:33):
financially and we zipped off to England, where we lived with.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
His parents for a year. Wow okay dang. During that time,
he proposed his parents have got to be cool. To
live with them for a year and then there's no
frustration you like, it leads to you getting proposed parents
gotta be cool. I don't know. Maybe maybe they're not cool.
We'll find out.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Maybe they're like a hot maybe they're hot. Ooh okay.
During that time, he proposed I was over the moon.
I said yes, and then we had to have a
come to Jesus talk about our situation. In the end,
we moved back to the US to complete his permanent residency.
While living with my parents since he couldn't work at
the time. However, during all of this, I was very
(02:13):
blind to what was actually happening. In the beginning, his
ex wife had contacted me about how he cheated on her.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
And yeah, blah blah blah blah blah.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
Being the typical girl in a new relationship high I
figured she was just bitter and angry, and he perpetuated
that lie with stories about how she was crazy, you know,
the usual.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
You always got to be careful when people tell you
that their exes were crazy. Sometimes they were crazy, but
you gotta be like, why was she crazy? To give
me some examples of her crazy.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
Yeah, it's like the same thing as like someone who's
like every job they've ever had they ended up quitting because.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
Their boss sucked.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
Yeah, and it's like, well every job well, like really,
During the course of our relationship, there were a few
red flags that he was quick to have stories for,
Oh uh, this girl I'm chatting with.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Oh, she's an old friend and I'm just catching up.
I'm chatting with Chase. You gotta do the next. This
girl I'm shotting with.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
I can't do it.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Keep going. Of course, this was.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
A lie, among many others that I found out about
after the fact. The biggest lie he told me was
near the end of our relationship. I had a best
friend named Cynthia who he had gotten close to just
a few days before my birthday. He told me they
were heading out to the mall to buy me a gift,
you know, just a few hours and then he'd be back.
He didn't come home until five AM, when I was
(03:30):
waking up to get ready for work. He claimed the
car broke down on their way home from the mall
and they had to call our mutual friend Kim to
jumpstart the engine.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
And they never text to do any of that.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
Yeah, which, as is, we all know jump starting a
car takes nine hours.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
We all know that obvious lie. That was such an
obvious lie, just pathetic.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
Well, the mall closed at ten pm, and when I
spoke to him about it, she said she met up
with them just past eleven PM to help out, and
that they were very wasted and touchy. She said she
felt awkward the entire time and asked why I wasn't there.
She said they both claimed that they had asked me
to hang out, but I said no. Lo and behold
on my birthday. Neither of them had a gift for
me at that point.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Uh yeah, I'd be like, oh, what were you doing
for all of those hours from ten am to five am?
I got a gift for you?
Speaker 3 (04:22):
It's I got a it's a new girlfriend for me,
and I think we're gonna break up.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
I love you so much, Happy birthday. That's like twenty hours.
God did of like twenty hours? What were you doing
in the twenty hours? Her? Dang man.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
At that point, it was pretty obvious that something had happened,
and with previous evidence, I was finally done with his BS.
I gave him back the ring and informed my parents
that our relationship was over. Keep in mind, I confided
in my mother a lot growing up. We were very
close and I always went to her when I had
issues or was frustrated you about everything, and I mean everything.
(05:03):
I told my mother that I was contacting his parents
and I was arranging to buy his plane ticket back
home to the UK with my own money. As I
saw it, he had cheated on me and it was
time to have him move out so we could both
move on with our lives. At this time, I was
twenty two, nearing twenty three. I was very wrong about this.
My mother and my father decided to put their feet
(05:24):
down and told me that I brought him back to
America so we needed to sort our crap out. They
also refused to let him move into the guest bedroom.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
Wait what what?
Speaker 4 (05:33):
Wait?
Speaker 2 (05:34):
Wait? Your parents forced you to stay with them? What what? Wait?
Speaker 3 (05:39):
And they wouldn't even they wouldn't put him in the
guest bedroom.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
They were like, you have to live with him?
Speaker 3 (05:44):
They what made you share a bedroom with the guy
who had cheated on you on your birthday and didn't
get you a gift? Wow, I'm sleeping outside, dude. Yeah,
I'm going to I'm getting an RII membership, I'm buying
a tent. I'm sleeping outside, and then I'm returning to
return it.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Yeah, dude returns with ari I or nujob. She's great,
you know, And if I fall in love with the tent,
maybe I keep it. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
Anyways, for the next six months, I lived in hell.
He was verbally and emotionally abusive, didn't respect any of
my boundaries. I worked six am to four pm, and
he was constantly up until four or five am on
Skype with new girls and gaming buddies being super loud.
The list goes on and on. It was awful, just
take my word for it. On top of it all,
(06:30):
I was constantly arguing with my parents about it. They
saw absolutely nothing wrong with what was happening and that
we needed to be adults and work it out.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
I mean, so, I'm wondering right now because we don't
know were we kind of in all peace financial situations.
She's staying with her parents because they're saving money. Was
that it?
Speaker 3 (06:47):
Did?
Speaker 2 (06:47):
They say, yeah, it was.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
Just a situation where they're living with their parents in
this here, and you know, you can make the logical
leap if it's like they're twenty two, yeah, twenty three
living at home saving money.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Yeah, starting career. My advice for you, because I don't
think you can get through to him. You can't get
through your parents. Do so much research to find literally
anywhere else you can live.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Then yes, get out, you get out, and like, you know,
this is more for anyone who may find themselves in
a situation like this.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
Yeah, don't. It's just so the parents are being so absurd.
Speaker 3 (07:22):
I don't understand it, and I think if I was ope,
I would immediately be like, oh, so, okay, Mom, who
did you cheat on dad with while you were engaged?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Oh you didn't.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Dad. Who did you cheat on mom with when you
were engaged?
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Oh you didn't.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
Oh so neither. So you're both just talking right out
of your butts. Cool nice?
Speaker 2 (07:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
Yeah, So nothing changed until I finally had a nervous
breakdown and told them that if he didn't go, I
would move out and take my five hundred dollars in
rent and utilities elsewhere. Go.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
You're already paying rent. Oh you're already paying rent. Leave? Yes, yes,
just leave. Take take your five hundred dollars elsewhere. Yes. Please.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
They promptly agreed to let him move into the guest bedroom.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Why didn't we do that for the start? Why didn't
we do that six months ago? God?
Speaker 3 (08:07):
However, he refused to move into the other bedroom For
the next week and a half. I had to argue
with him about moving his things. I finally got sick
of it and moved his crap myself when he was
out on a date with Cynthia. We weren't friends anymore
at this point, obviously. Once he moved into the guest bedroom,
things were okay. I was able to lock myself away
in my room when I wasn't at work, and I
really just poured myself into my job and doing art
(08:28):
on the side for additional income. It was a crappy
situation to be in, but I was trying to make
it work. Unfortunately, it only got worse. It became clear
that my parents were choosing his side over mine.
Speaker 2 (08:38):
Boy, you know what this is. You guys aren't even
together and they're letting them live in their house. Oh.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
Sometimes, through no fault of their own, people are just
a sucker for a British accent.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
They're like, but darling, he's British. They just they just
she says here to me, like love, hello, love. They
hear him on the phone through the wall with Cynthia saying.
Speaker 5 (08:58):
Oh Cynthia, do you want to settle point? I can't
wait to show off your proper fit body everyone down
there at THEUSKI and they just go.
Speaker 3 (09:13):
Swoon, Oh my goodness, swoon. That's gonna be our son
in law. And it's not their fault. It's the British's fault.
It's the British for speaking so hot.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
Speak too hot man.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
Anyway, Kean is something to say.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Yeah, well, well you got something wrong with the British accent.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
Ke On, you have something wrong with the British, with
the Brits. You got a problem with Britz.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
I love a good Carlsberg. You don't even know what that.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
Is, Carlsburg. I know what a Carlsberg is. Yeah, what
is it? It's carls first of all. So it became
clear that my parents were choosing his side over mine.
He said a lot of nasty things about me to them,
and I got to hear about them through them in
a I can't believe you did this way. My mother
started leaving me nasty written letters under my door, and
(09:56):
whenever I would confront her, she would say everything she'd
written was true because my ex fiance had told her. Well, okay,
the British.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Man told me this was true.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
You would never lie to me, as you know that
it states clearly in the Magna Carta.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
A british Man must tell the truth. I have come
this so you can't lie to me.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
I reminded her that all of this information she was
getting was coming from the mouth of a lying cheater,
and she was going to take his word over mine.
Her own daughter. Well, that's exactly what she did. When
I had managed to save up enough money, I pieced
out and moved out without a dang word to anyone.
I had a friend several states away who was kind
enough to let me rent out their spare bedroom, and
(10:42):
that's what I rocked for a solid year before I
met my current boyfriend and moved in with him. I'm
in a happy, solid place in my life and I'm
almost to one to seven eo.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
Ages.
Speaker 3 (10:55):
My ex fiance still lives within my parents after five years.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
That's so funny. That's so funny, and they deserve it
so much. Oh my goodness. Imagine being like you're telling
your friends or your new partner and they're like, you're
talking about exes and stuff, and you say, yeah, you know,
I had a really terrible experience with my last X.
He lives with my parents. And they were like, oh,
he lives with his parents. No, no, no, he lives
(11:22):
with my parents still five years later.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Yeah, he cheated on me on my birthday and then
he moved you with my parents and they like him
more as what absurd? What that's actually one of the
craziest things.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
Yeah, yeah, that they could have done.
Speaker 3 (11:39):
So my ex fiance still lives with my parents in
the time after we broke up until I moved out.
He didn't have a job and thus didn't pay rent
or anything else.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
That's insane. Me out here went to school. I'm sorry,
is he doing it? He britished so hard that they
were like, you don't have to you don't have to
pay for anything. You can to stay in the room.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
What would that accent actually have to sound like?
Speaker 6 (12:03):
What if he just maybe he's an was Maybe he
was Jason Staither, He's I'm the transporter and the people
transport and then he just goes outside and he watches
clips from the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. Maybe he
comes back in eight hours later and he says, oh,
that was a long day at work, and they're like, oh,
(12:24):
he's so mister, that was.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
A long day at work. With that with.
Speaker 6 (12:28):
Chelsea, Oh she's gorgeous, cheat on her, cheat with her
any day of the week.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
I'm a sucker for a lady with the name of
his name Cynthia. That one didn't sound like just state
then that was just I don't know how to do
a step and ales and so I'm just doing it
to a British transporter.
Speaker 6 (12:44):
Transport transport transport on the transport all right, that one
was bad too.
Speaker 3 (12:50):
Okay, So this jobless, penniless British man is living with
Ope's parents.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
Yeah, and he's providing a service however British.
Speaker 3 (12:59):
However, he did complete his permanent residency and is now
allowed to work. After I moved out, I didn't speak
to my parents unless it was absolutely required. I called
on Christmas, New Year's, Mother's Day, et cetera. I didn't
give my parents my address, though. I was fine with
cutting all ties with my family since it was clear
they were going to support my jack butt lazy ex fiance.
(13:21):
So that was just over three years ago. Yes, he
still lives with them. Over time, my relationship with my
mom got a bit better, but she's never apologized for
what happened. That's okay. I don't expect one from her,
but I won't make her a priority in my life.
The other day, I got a random Facebook message from
my ex fiance's mother asking me to message him because
(13:42):
he had a question for me. I was hesitant at first,
but unblocked him on Facebook and I asked him what
was up. He asked me about my TV and my
papaison chair. What the heck is a papaison chair?
Speaker 2 (13:53):
It's I think it's what I have, like a nest,
like a pillow nest chair.
Speaker 3 (13:59):
I believe it's But how do you pronounce as.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Papasa papasanan papasa sandude?
Speaker 3 (14:08):
When we were living with my parents, I bought both
of these things, and when I moved out, I left
them behind because I didn't have room in my car.
I refused to make a second trip out of fear
of dealing with him or my family. He said, since
he had been using them since I left, he just
wanted to ask if he could take them since he
was moving out of my parents' house and into his
own place.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
I said I didn't care.
Speaker 3 (14:28):
Honestly, I wasn't going to be getting those things back,
and I really did not give two crabs if he
took them without my permission.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
That was the extent of our conversation.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
Girl, If you don't tell this dude, he needs to
pay you for taking your belongings.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
Yeah, I'm mad at you. Now you get that money, man,
say yeah, I'll take all your money please. Yeah. Sure
you can have it for a price that I will determine. Yeah,
otherwise I'm selling it on Facebook market Place. Yeah, what,
which is where I'll be finding my next roommate.
Speaker 3 (14:53):
Yeah and if yeah, and if you want money, you
can sell it on Facebook Marketplace and I'll give you
a commission.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
For God's sakes, give this man n nothing. He's taking your.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
Parent He's taking your parents. They couldn't have been that
good person. It's again the British accent. It's not their fault,
which we're joking.
Speaker 3 (15:09):
But a few hours later I got an angry phone
call from my mother asking why in the heck would
I give him permission to take the TV in the chair?
I said, to be honest, I didn't give a dang.
I hadn't seen either of those things in over three years,
and I wasn't that god dang attached to them if
he was going to use them.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
So what.
Speaker 3 (15:26):
That's not like I was going to get any use
out of them anyway. So then she went on a
tirade about how he hasn't been paying rent since May
and that he's knocked up Cynthia but left her for
another girl. Oh shocking.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
Uh, dude, I don't feel bad for these pairs one bit.
I'm sorry Bisey Chef says, why that would they give
him permission to continue to live in their house because
there's a sucker for a British accent.
Speaker 3 (15:52):
It's just all around absurd. I agreed on so many
different levels.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Greed.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
I just absurd that the mom has to go all
to complain about the ex fiance to her daughter that
she abandoned over this guy.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
Her daughter said, please kick him out. We he has
to go, and they said no.
Speaker 3 (16:10):
Like yeah, they said, no, you're actually a failure because
you're abandoning your marriage that hasn't happened yet, but you
brought him to the States, so it's like you've essentially
signed the contract.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
H yeah.
Speaker 3 (16:22):
Yeah, So so he's not paying rent. He got Cynthia pregnant.
His room is an episode of Hoarders gone wrong. Blah
blah blah blah blah blah blah. Also, while my mother
was in the nursing home she has failing health, and
my dad was visiting my ex through a huge party
that my uncle came home to.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
Oh I thought I misread that as came to.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
Yeah, your uncle, my uncle showed up and that really
was ooh bad because my uncle goes way too far
at the party, oh lord, my uncle comes over to
make sure the house is okay while my mom's in
the hospital or the nursing home when she has really
bad episodes. I spoke to him and he said it
was close to forty to fifty people who trashed the house.
The list of you know, malfeasans goes on and on.
(17:05):
My mother then told me I had to deal with
my ex fiance since it was originally my idea to
bring him around.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
And I'd say, no, my, what are their heads full
of rocks? These You don't have to let him stay there.
I don't understand why they don't just.
Speaker 3 (17:19):
Say, Lee, is your mom in the hospital because she
did the experimental procedure where they replace her brain with
a freaking boulder.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
What's going on? What's happening? Rock surgery? Yea on, what's happening?
Everyone wants to know what's happening, what's gone? Because if
someone's in your house and they're not pano any rent,
and they're not bathing.
Speaker 4 (17:38):
Themselves, you just say, hey, get out of my house, okay.
Apparently she and my father had been trying to get
him out for months, but he either wasn't listening or
said he would move out by a certain date and
then never would. I told her to call the police
and have him forcibly removed, since it's their house and
if they're removing him, they can escort him out and
watch as he takes his things. She said, no, that
(18:00):
wouldn't do, and that I needed to handle this situation.
Oh that's it.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
Uh bye, hang up. There are so many times in
this phone call that I'd be hanging up.
Speaker 3 (18:09):
This is when I absolutely lost it. I reminded her
of all the bs I had to go through with
him and her, and how in the end both she
and my father supported him and his words over me.
They paid for everything he needed, such as clothes and
little death sticks. Those aren't cheap. Centered to cater to
every need like he was their little baby. Yet if
(18:32):
I was a day late on my rent because I
was waiting for payday, oh no, throw me in the
lake of fire. I'm an irredeemable monster. I reminded her
that he had cheated on me, and when I made
it clear our relationship was over, they refused to let
him move out of the house, much less my room,
until I finally snapped and threatened to move out. I
reminded her of every letter she slipped under my door,
(18:53):
every nasty insult she flung my way because he had
lied to her. Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.
I said, no, I'm not helping. She made her decision
when she chose him over me, and she needs to
stick to it and get him out of the house
if that's what she truly wanted. Now, it sucked getting
that rude with my mother, but she had to know
where I stood and the position she was trying to
(19:14):
place me in. We however, however, however, it's not.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
As easy as that, dang it. Now.
Speaker 3 (19:22):
My mother is very sick. She is constantly in and
out of the hospital with heart and lung issues. She
lives on an oxygen tank now, and any amount of
stress can trigger a whole slew of issues. Her doctors
have warned her multiple times that stress could give her
a stroke. I've already lost my grandmother to a stroke,
so I don't want my mother to go the same way.
A part of me feels responsible for the situation, since
(19:44):
I don't want my mother to have to put up
with him. After my conversation with my mother, I sent
my ex fiance another message. I told him that after
speaking to my mother, I wasn't comfortable with him taking anything,
including the TV or chair. I said those things were
to remain where they are and he is not allowed
to take them. I said this was my first and
last message to him regarding the issue, and to resolve
this as peacefully as possible with my parents. They deserve
(20:07):
that much to be safe. I screenshotted the message and
sent it to my mother as well, and then blocked
him on Facebook again.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
So my question is did I handle this the right way?
Speaker 3 (20:14):
I feel incredibly bad that I don't want to do
anything more for my parents, but at the same time,
I also feel that they made their bed and have
to lie in it now. If anyone else has gone
through something similar, what would you do? Should I call
the police for them? Should I make a visit?
Speaker 2 (20:26):
What are they? Your kids? Your parents? Your mom might
not be doing well, but your dad seems fine. He
can handle it.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
Yeah, where's dad? Here's the solution right here? Mom goes
and spends an afternoon with a friend if she has one,
and Dad calls the cops and they forcibly remove your terrible.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
Ex from the house. We love it solution. Mom doesn't
have to deal with any of the stress. Nothing. He's gone.
Speaker 3 (20:50):
Yeah, the day is saved. Yeah, and you don't have
to be involved. So what do I do? Should I
make a visit? I'm at a loss since I feel
I've done enough but not enough, if that makes any
sense whatsoever. Any helper advice is much appreciated. Thank you
so much. And hey, by the way, we would thank
you so much if you listened to full episodes with
stories just like this on Spotify or Apple podcasts or
(21:12):
iHeartRadio or wherever you beautiful people listen to podcasts just
search Okay, storytime and uh, you've got the whole world
in your hands. You've got oh Mal, I need more.
I've used that one. You've got the kit in Kaboodle
I've used I've used that one too.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
I've got the Keys to the Kingdom. That's a new one.
I haven't used that one yet. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
Sure, you've got the touch, You've got the power.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Got a girl, Come boy, Why didn't they legally evict
that leach? Because they're silly.
Speaker 3 (21:45):
They're silly, I mean, and depending on where you are,
like sometimes, you know, I think California has recently changed
like squatter's rights or oh yeah, if he.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
Was there for five years, he might have some kind
of say over.
Speaker 3 (21:55):
But if you're not paying rent, you know, yeah, and
California did recently, I think change a lot of that
to where it's it's basically a more streamline process. But anyway,
but regardless, Yeah, your parents sort of made their bad dude,
so it's not your fault that they're laying in it now.
It's unfortunate that your mom has health problems. Like of course,
you you know, you're not a demon, like you're not
wishing that upon your mom. But you know what, I've
(22:16):
said it before, I'll say it again. When we have
health problems. When you have health complications, the responsibility of
dealing with that lives upon you, you know.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
And also you know, like if you'll like, this kind
of goes into parents who are old and expect their
kids to take care of them. If you didn't treat
your kids well when they were children or throughout their life,
you can't really expect them to want to take care
of you when you're old and need taken care of.
So treat your family members well and then you'll get
someone to take care of you when you're old.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Yes, ma'am. Yeah, dad should be doing this. Looking at
some comments here, says Amulin says legal eviction would mess
with his immigration status to yes, Yeah, let's finish this story. Yeah,
there's an edit. Thank you everyone who has responded to this.
I didn't expect this post to absolutely explode. With some
amazing advice and some harsh realizations and great support. I've
(23:05):
tried to respond to everything I could, and I've read
every single comment that's been made so far.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
You guys are amazing.
Speaker 3 (23:10):
I think I've gotten everything I need from this thread,
but I will continue to read and comment on anything
new if I can. I can't say that there will
be an update, but should I find out anything of worth,
I'll be sure to post that in the future. And
that is the end against story. Yeah, your dad opied
needs to be. If your mom is like to the
point where stress can give her a stroke, and they
literally exiled you in favor of the man who cheated
(23:31):
on you on your birthday, they can go ahead and
navigate that themselves.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
They're agreed, all grown adults, man, And.
Speaker 3 (23:40):
If you know they can't figure out how to go,
you know, day by day without giving your mom a
stroke after being told what to do by the doctors
to prevent it.
Speaker 2 (23:48):
In no way on you. Nope, not at all.
Speaker 3 (23:50):
So yeah, that's the end of that story. Oh lord,
you got another one, though.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
We have another one. We go, we got another one.
But let's get to this next story. My parents disapprove
of my boyfriend, especially when he asked for my hand. Well,
he's already got two of them. My s O and
I have been together for about four years and I've
been living together since May. We have just moved across
the state to finish our degrees so as to be
(24:14):
more employable. So O and I decided that after our
first semester, if we had pulled grades and proven to
ourselves that we could be responsible, we would talk about
getting engaged. We both love each other very much and
know that we want to be together.
Speaker 3 (24:28):
I just get to really quickly point out that that's
my favorite way getting Like the reasoning forgetting a degree
has been described. Yeah, for the purposes of being more employable, eloyable.
Speaker 2 (24:38):
However they said it. Oh, I didn't say it right,
but it was. It was funny. By the way, this
comes from don't hate mass Kate and if you want
to submit your own stories, go to the r slash
Okay storytime severed it.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
So I have to be that guy and say do
we all know what that means? Yes to Chew, you
didn't give keyon time to not.
Speaker 2 (24:53):
This past semester, we both made the Dean's List and
had our engagement talk. We decided that we do want
to get ma and want to take the next step.
He called his parents and told them he'd be asking
me to marry him, and they were very happy. I
am extremely close with my family. My family has had
reservations about so since we began dating. When s O
and I first met, he worked and lived at a hotel.
(25:16):
I worked and lived in my own apartment. We both
did not have bachelor degrees to my parents. At twenty seven,
Soo had no prospects as he had no degree and
was not in school, lived in a hotel, and barely
made any money. After about a year of us dating,
I lost my job and had to move home. I
decided that I wanted to go back to school to
finish my degree. So So was someone I could see
(25:37):
myself with for a very long time, and I knew
that in order to be able to do the things
I wanted, get married, have a family, support myself financially.
I needed to have a degree. SOO agreed that he
should also go back to school for the same reasons.
I just want to say, you always go to trade school.
Speaker 3 (25:53):
Saw such a people who have plumbing businesses make a
lot of money.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
But you had to.
Speaker 3 (25:58):
Crawl under how life every one wants to be a plumber.
I couldn't be a plumber because I'm so scared of bugs.
Speaker 2 (26:03):
That's true. He decided on and associates in it. He
pulled straight a's and ifter around with these and c's.
My parents were happy that he was going back to
school and understood that it was a lucrative field. They
weren't too ecstatic about the associates, but knew that he
didn't need a full B bachelor's for it. Last year,
so and I had a discussion about our degrees. He
was taking two classes and I could only afford one
(26:25):
online at a time. We both agree that being full
time students was what we wanted and began working towards that.
In August, we moved across the state to attend university
full time. Now that we're here, we live off of
financial aid, SOO could only take three classes because he
did not get as much financial aid as I did
and we couldn't afford for him to take another class.
(26:45):
I feel like this is a sacrifice he has made
for us. My parents see it as he's only taking
three classes because of his extra time. They believe he
should get a job. Our first semester, we both thought
that we did not need extra money. We did not
budget well, and by dec we were basically broke. We
used holiday money and a two hundred dollars loan for
my parents to get by until our loans came in
(27:07):
For the next semester. I found a job that is
not the greatest fit for me physically, but I'm willing
to do it so we have a cushion for the
summer when we do not get financial aid.
Speaker 3 (27:16):
Their job is being uh the practice partner for like
a WWE wrestler.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Yeah, they're like, it's not it's not great. It does hurt.
The word body is taxing, but it pays all right.
I take four classes and VP of my academic club.
I put a lot of time effort into my club
because I truly enjoy it. Just got offered an internship
and have a weekend job that I have not started yet.
I've also applied to other student jobs. He takes three classes,
(27:43):
takes care of all of the household duties except cooking,
which I enjoy, and hangs out on the internet. To
my parents, my esso is a lazy, unmotivated f.
Speaker 3 (27:51):
Up that doesn't we lost Oh no, oh, yeah, no,
I mean both uh oh uh oh? And also am
I gonna sit like this now?
Speaker 2 (28:03):
My back was starting to hurt? Oh boy. To my parents,
myso is a lazy, unmotivated f up. Apparently he has
no spark when he talks about his education. He does
not love it, but knows he can make a living,
and they think he just goes with the motions. They
also think his personality is annoying. He's boisterous hipster type
(28:24):
that do those line up? Type? Those?
Speaker 3 (28:27):
Those are usually boisterous hipsters.
Speaker 2 (28:29):
Yeah, what is a boisterous hipster like?
Speaker 3 (28:31):
Yeah, Steven Tyler, I.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
Am a go getter. He is not. They do have
a point about him needing to get a job with
three classes. He does have the time to work, and
we need the money. I should not be the only
one working, especially because I have a lot on my plate.
I s agrees, but has low self esteem via employment,
as he only really delivered pizzas and worked as a telemarketer.
(28:53):
Wait what, I'm sorry he has low self esteem about employment.
He's like, oh, well, I just couldn't get a so
I'm not going to even try. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:03):
I mean that's like, uh, you maybe you miss one
of the shots you don't take. You strike out one
hundred percent of the at bats you don't swing.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
I understand why your parents wouldn't be cool with that.
Jobs are also very hard to come by in our
small rural town. I feel he needs to push his
feelings of inadequacy out of the way and just try
for jobs no matter what. Yeah, that's kind of life
advice for anyone.
Speaker 3 (29:25):
Yeah, dude, you can literally h Have you heard I
literally just talked about Steven Tyler. Have you ever heard
about fake it till you make it? Literally just show
up and be like. I got a job and figured out.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
So So called my parents two days ago to ask
for my dad's blessing on our engagements. My dad said
yes to so So, but I found out later that
he only agreed because he felt blindsided and thought, how
could I say no, my dad is against us getting
married for the time being until SOO can prove that
he can be a provider. Honestly not fully disagree with
(29:55):
the parents. I get where they're coming from. They're saying
they want this guy who supposedly got to be marrying
their daughter to have money.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
Yeah, perfectly reasonable to be well, we don't want him
to just be doing pizza delivery. Yeah, right, right now.
Speaker 2 (30:12):
He doesn't even have a job. That's the thing. He
has zero job and he's taking three classes. That is
the thing. Like, dude, I was taking five to six
classes and I had a job, and I was doing
like shows, you can get a job. My mom wants
me to meet someone else. I understand where my dad
is coming from. I truly do. But in my mind,
so SO and I going back to school was proof
(30:33):
that s SO was serious about getting his life on track. Yes,
but good job, good job just needs more time. Just like,
don't just don't rush into this.
Speaker 3 (30:40):
He just needs more Yeah, don't get more gathering of information.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
After his degree, he would be able to get a
job in his field. You will probably end up making
more money than I will in my field. I know,
we cannot survive on love alone. Love does not pay
the bills. My SO is my best friend. He has
been with me through some very tough times. He takes
care of me. I suffer from anxiety and can feel
panicky at times. He supports all of my endeavors and
(31:06):
is always happy to lend a hand. He dressed up
like a Disney character for one of my club events
and took pictures with the kids from the community for
two days. He pushes me to do well as I
can sometimes fall into a procrastination spiral, and he does
everything around the house. Emotionally, he is everything I have
ever wanted in a partner. We respect each other and
are able to talk out our problems. We have healthy,
(31:27):
spicy sleep life, and find each other both physically and
spicy relatedly attractive. This is not to say we don't fight,
but we are careful when we do. I am heartbroken
that my parents basically said no. I am offended by
some of the things my mom said. Thinking about our
engagement had filled me with such excitement and love for MYESO,
and now when I think about it, I cry because
(31:49):
I'm so disappointed that my parents do not support us.
I mean, prove them wrong. You know, you could still
get married even without like, obviously it would be nice
to out their approval, but you could just be like, hey,
you know, bro, we'll be doing fine and then hopefully
they'll come around. Yeah, I mean, I mean it sucks.
Speaker 3 (32:05):
There's more to a partnership than financial security or you know.
It sounds like, you know, it sounds like you all
have a pretty solid thing going on. But yeah, with uh,
maybe that just means you aren't just ready to make
that move yet.
Speaker 2 (32:18):
There's just no need to. Don't rush. It's like it's
not like rush's.
Speaker 3 (32:22):
Over, you know, and you don't need their approval at
the end of the day, it doesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
That's my point. It's like maybe once you you know,
are successful and stuff, they'll they'll realize.
Speaker 3 (32:30):
But also it doesn't really matter what they think anytime.
It's just about money too. It's like it's like, so,
what if I married a doctor and he was just
like the worst, the worst person ever.
Speaker 2 (32:38):
Yeah, they are only thinking about money. And again, like
to an extent, I see where they're coming from. But also, again,
you can get married if you want to. Doesn't they
don't you know, they're not officiating. They don't have to
say yes.
Speaker 3 (32:51):
Yeah, it's true, you're you're getting married, not your parents.
But quick pause here for uh remembers. Chiliba is popping off.
They got a phone call that their cousin pass away
and there will be here tomorrow. Heartsit chat. Yeah please,
and I'm so sorry about that.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
I'd be good luck. Yeah, thoughts with your thoughts with
you and with your family. But we're going to keep
reading and I hope that you know we'll be here
for when you get back. Yes. So and I had
a long talk last night. He agrees he needs to
get a job. He has applied to what he can
in our area and says he'll keep looking until something
sticks good. I feel like even if he does this,
it will not be good enough for my parents, maybe
(33:27):
that it won't be And then you know, you're like,
even like he is applying now and they don't even care.
It's like, Okay, I want to marry this man. How
can I continue with an engagement when no one will
be happy for us? I know that all that matters
is us, but it means a lot to me what
my family thinks. They're not fans of his. I do
not know if this will change. Ours is the healthiest
(33:48):
relationship I've ever been in, but no one seems to
notice that I'm not a loss. And there is an update.
Speaker 1 (33:53):
Hey Sam, we're going to get back to the stories.
But here's three minutes of bads from our sponsors.
Speaker 3 (33:57):
And the only thing that's not healthy is the uh
the wallet.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Yeah yeah, look, and he's he's already said he's gonna
get a job. And that's you know, that was my
only critique. All you can do is enjoy what.
Speaker 3 (34:10):
You have, and like you said, it's like it doesn't
matter what other people think. Yeah, of course you're gonna care
what your parents have to say.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
But if your parents truly love you, which I hope
that they do, and care about you, then they will
see as this relationship continues that he loves and supports
you and is trying to better himself for your relationship,
and they'll and they'll come on board. But you know,
right now, they're not really looking at the intricacies of
your relationship.
Speaker 3 (34:33):
Only two people on earth who really need to be
excited about you getting engaged are you and your partner
dingis Bot who is OPI Come on, dingus, come on,
come on, dingus.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
Failure dingis, but there is an update. The first few
weeks after all this happened, my s O and I
were in a serious depressed bunk. This all hit me
harder than anyone for obvious reasons, and I started my
semester off pretty crappy, which is and good. I spoke
with my parents a lot after the initial sadness or off.
(35:05):
My dad stayed true to what he said that he
had my best interest in mind and was worried about
my financial future. My mom's apologies were half hearted, but
we eventually got to a place of understanding. My s
remained hurt, humiliated, and angry for a while. He is
still hurt and angry, but he's been able to deal
with his feelings better as time has gone on. We
went back to couples counseling and that was really helpful.
(35:27):
He also started seeing a psychiatrist his idea and has
been taking antidepressants. I am really proud of him, as
he comes from a family that does not believe mental
health is a thing. My s O and I have
both agreed to put off our engagement until we had
some savings in our bank account. That's just like smart thinking. Bizzah.
We got there and things were more stable, both financially
(35:48):
and emotionally between our families. He has been looking for work,
but he has not been able to gain employment just yet. I,
on the other hand, found a job and am working
as a social media manager at a consulting firm. Mom
and dad called us a few weeks ago to let
us know that they wanted to start over with MYSOH.
This is all looking good. We're on the right track.
They want to let go of the past and just
(36:10):
move forward. They love me and to have my back,
but also understand that I love myso and that we
have a very solid relationship. They do not want to
be the reason and we break up if that were
to happen. My dad called my SOO and apologized for
the conversation they had when my ESSO asked him to
marry me. My dad felt bad about the situation and
let MYSO know that he is hopeful that we are
(36:31):
on our way to becoming financially secure and happy coming
out of us. I respect my parents a lot. I
am not happy with their feelings towards MYESO, but I
am happy that they love me enough to bring their
concerns to me, but respect my decisions. I'm also happy
that my ESSO took this as a little hitting rock
bottom his words the situation and has now been getting
(36:51):
stuff in order to work love. I think that's pretty
much it for now. Nothing is one hundred percent and
it's not like this is all puppies and rainbows. But
things are better and I've settled down. I really like
my new job and hope that MYSO will be able
to find employment soon. If not now, then definitely over
the summer when a lot of the students go home
for break again. Thank you so much for all the help.
(37:13):
Reddit can be a really awesome place. And there is
a second update. We're on the right track. We are
on the right track and we love to see it.
Things are happening, things are balls rolling up. We love it.
Speaker 3 (37:24):
Update's going to be we make a million dollars a
year and we have seven children and we are all
doing great.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Badpool Girl says, yay, sounds like dad straight mom out. Yeah,
it does sound like, you know, they had a really
good talk and she was like, you know what I was,
I was reacting pretty harshly, And again, it does seem
like it's coming from a place of truth, like caring
about you and wanting you to have a financially stable life.
But it was just misguided and much.
Speaker 3 (37:52):
Like we are never cluding fully into any given situation
we read about. Your parents probably aren't fully clued in
to you know, everything, But they just see this guy
who doesn't make any money.
Speaker 2 (38:04):
Wants to wait, and now they're gonna get engaged.
Speaker 3 (38:06):
Yeah, I worry for you.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
I am worried. But there is a second update, so
this will be the last update to refresh my s oh,
I'll call him. Brad and I were keen on getting engaged.
He called my dad to get the okay and blah
blah blah, YadA, YadA YadA.
Speaker 3 (38:21):
Didn't sound like a Brad. That sounded more like a Flad.
Speaker 2 (38:24):
The way you said that. Brad fled. Since my last update,
I have been employed by the same company since March. Congrats.
I love my job. I am working in my field
and I am very appreciated at work. Brad barely searched
for work.
Speaker 3 (38:39):
Oh no, no, no, no no no no no no no
no no no.
Speaker 2 (38:42):
The ball's rolling down the hill. The ball is sissifus.
Speaker 3 (38:47):
No.
Speaker 4 (38:50):
No.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
He had two interviews in the time between then and
now January to July, he only had two interviews in
six January to July. Your parents were right.
Speaker 3 (39:02):
Maybe he's like, I'm only interviewing for positions. I feel
like I'm really worthy of as as someone with what
pizza delivery experience and telemarketing super rough When your parents
gonna go, I told you so, I'm only applying for
CEO positions and never gained employment.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
Throughout these past few months, Brad and I have been
fighting a lot. I try to be supportive of his
search for a job, which he lied to me about
he never truly looked too hard, and of a schoolwork.
He got straight a's again. In late March, my mom
was diagnosed with stage three cancer. Oh. Brad was an
okay support but it was hard for him as he
really dislikes all members of my family. Brad, I was
(39:41):
rooting for you, man, I was rooting for you, and
you're letting me down. By the end of the semester,
I was nagging Brad a lot about finding a job.
By this time, we actually needed the money, as our
student loans would run out and what I make at
my job isn't enough to support two people, like I said,
and he admits this. He barely looked for work. He
ran out of money, and I began to support us
both on whatever was left of my student loans, my
(40:03):
tax return, and what I made at my job. He
spent his last cash on Devil's lettuce and T shirts. Wow,
this guy sucks. He began smoking Devil's lettuce all day
every day. We began to move further away from each other.
Two weeks ago, my dad passed away due to complications
from surgery. I am heartbroken and functioning okay, but very
(40:24):
overwhelmed that my dad passed away suddenly and my mom
began chemo last week. My family is just I don't know,
we're pulling together. What a freaking turn. This story was
going so well.
Speaker 3 (40:35):
I mean in a way now that now you should
know that this is not someone you want to marry,
or that you're not ready to marry, or he's not
ready to in the moment where he needs to step
up the hardest.
Speaker 2 (40:46):
He is now fully gone to sleep. At the time
of my dad's death, Brad was just not emotionally available.
He was of no support to me. At my dad Shiva,
Brad was incredibly rude to my family and myself. I
barely spoke to him the rest of the time I
was back home. When we both got back into town,
I broke up with him. Yeah yeah, yeah, yep. We
(41:07):
are currently living in the same house until my apartment
is ready in August. He wants to stay friends.
Speaker 3 (41:12):
Why Why would I want to be friends with someone
like you?
Speaker 2 (41:15):
Why would I want to be friends with someone who
doesn't support me when my parent passes away? Why would
want that? Oh?
Speaker 3 (41:20):
Things are reading hard. I've become emotionally unavailable. Sorry about
that bad friend.
Speaker 2 (41:24):
He wants to say, friends, I'm not sure what I want.
I think you are I don't I think you know
what you want. At this moment, he is out buying
Devil's let us with our friend while I wait at
our house for his parents to come as they're visiting
for the next few days. His priority is are super aft.
I am happy to moving into my new place and
to start the next chapter of my life. I just
(41:45):
wish my dad was here to see it. And there
is a nine year update.
Speaker 1 (41:49):
Hey it's Sam. We're going to get back to these stories.
But here's three minutes of ads for our sponsors.
Speaker 2 (41:54):
There's a nine year update of folks, and I'm really
open that it's. Oh he's super happy and married and
has is rich. Yeah, wow, this guy sucks.
Speaker 3 (42:03):
Okay, so they're gonna be like, so remember that guy
who abandoned me. They're like, he came up with an
app and it made seventy eight trillion dollars. Yeah, you're
something like He'll be like, it's just gonna just be
another switch to root.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
But yes, correct move. I don't know.
Speaker 3 (42:21):
You break up if you can't swallow your own crap
at someone's funeral.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
Ridiculous to everyone there. Be respectful at a funeral, Dude,
it's your partner's dead.
Speaker 3 (42:32):
Come on you and you're what, Yeah, I just don't go.
Speaker 2 (42:36):
Just don't go. If you're gonna be respectful, I'm.
Speaker 3 (42:38):
Gonna be angsty in like a I look, there's just
nothing left to be said.
Speaker 2 (42:43):
No, Miss jay Bird says ex's a loser. Parents clocked it.
Sometimes your parents are right? Did you just smell it them?
Nine years later, it's been nine years since I wrote
those updates. I reread them today and I just cried
at all the comments saying how wonderful my dad was
and now my parents were looking out for me. They were,
They absolutely were. Soon after my dad passed away, my
(43:05):
mom followed about eighteen months later. Oh so sorry, Opete.
I left my university city and moved home to take
care of her. My family was with her when she passed.
We were so lucky to have been there together. After
Brad and I broke up, we stayed friends for a
while and he turned out to be a better friend
than boyfriend for a bit. He moved away and I
moved back home to take care of my mom. I
(43:26):
met a guy about a month after I moved home,
I'll call Frank. Frank and I dated for a few years,
and during that time Brad moved home. We hung out
once or twice, but it felt awkward, so I distanced
myself a little. The nail in Brad's coffin was when
his mom had an accident and passed away, and he
said a lot of nasty things to me.
Speaker 3 (43:43):
Ah.
Speaker 2 (43:44):
I know it was the grief talking, but I just
didn't want to be his friend anymore and deal with
his mood swings. Frank and my relationship blossomed. He was
such a huge support when my mom passed away and
took such great care of me. He's like no one
I had ever been with. We moved in together, and
then we got engaged and married. We'll be married three
years soon. We bought a house. We've been together for
seven years. Sometimes you know, you have to go through
(44:07):
a couple of frogs to buy in your.
Speaker 3 (44:08):
Prints, and sometimes your prince is a frog disguised as
a frog.
Speaker 2 (44:12):
And sometimes you can find full episodes of stories just
like this if you go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or
iHeartRadio and search of Pokes story time. There is a
teensy bit left to this story, and I think we've
said all that. We've got to say. The caffeine's making
my eyeballs. I have to be so bad. Yeah, we're
gonna hit this story.
Speaker 3 (44:31):
I think we all simultaneously just do the moment of like.
Speaker 2 (44:36):
As SI at the beginning of this story, I've been dying,
so I got to finish the story up. Frank and
my siblings get along so well. We all hang out
all the time, and it's so nice to have my
family around all the time. Again, I know my parents
would have loved Frank. He is so kind and loving
and funny too. My friends and family adore him. I
feel lucky to have come through such heartbreak. Things aren't perfect,
(44:56):
are they ever? And I deal with my grief every day,
but I have so many loving people around me that
show me they care, and I feel happy most days.
I miss my mom and dad so much. I'm just
grateful for the love they gave me when they were here.
And that is the end of that story and the
end of the episode and the end of that episode. Ah,
(45:17):
that's not quite the stay here, and we have to
speak your final life thoughts. Findal thoughts to anyone out
there whose family members are critical of your partner, Just
just take a minute, take a minute, listen to what
they're saying, and try and see if you can parse out.
Is there criticism coming from a place of genuine love
(45:41):
and care for you and like slight worry or is
it coming from a place of night and I'm critical
of everything that you ever done and I hate everyone
you ever bring home from you know, is it coming
from that or they're just a little bit worried because
oh maybe we have a little bit more live experience
for you know, than you, because we're older than you
and we send that you know, maybe maybe you guys
(46:02):
are not ready for this.
Speaker 3 (46:03):
Nobody in this life has a crystal ball that tells
them the future, but sometimes people have gone through things
that afford them more insight to given the situation, and.
Speaker 2 (46:13):
You can, you know, before you immediately write it all off,
take a minute, you know, listen to the advice, and
then try and decide does this advice supply.
Speaker 3 (46:22):
Or no based on where he ended up going with
his behavior. I feel like there were probably some pretty.
Speaker 2 (46:29):
Like pretty big.
Speaker 3 (46:30):
I mean, he could have obvious red flags.
Speaker 2 (46:32):
He was taking three classes and living off of Ope's
money and alone, So you know, would this be considered
a happy ending? I think so he's living. I mean,
obviously we've got a lot of hardship in her life,
but you know, most like very few people live life
without any hardship. And she got she got, you know,
she got love from it in the end. So I
(46:55):
think that's as happy as it could be. But very
very very sorry for your kids. I don't know, I
don't think so, I don't that I know of. Samantha
Ali says when parents say things like that, it's usually
because they have life experience and are sometimes right. But that, folks,
is the end of that story. And the end of
this episode, so if you love us, make sure to subscribe.
(47:15):
We love you and sitema
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