September 3, 2026 • 10 mins
On this episode of Our American Stories, Leslie Leyland Fields flew from her home in Alaska to Indiana to spend two weeks beside her best friend, Linda, who was dying of stage IV ovarian cancer. When it was finally time to leave, Leslie believed they still had months together. A week later, she learned that Linda was nearing the end.
Then, while Leslie was trying to make her way home, a mechanical problem grounded her flight. The delay gave the two friends something neither expected: three final phone calls. Leslie, a regular contributor to Our American Stories and the author of Write Your Story: Change Your Life, shares a deeply personal story about friendship, loss, writing, and learning to pay attention to the wonder of the life we're given.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
This is Lee Habib, and this is Our American Stories.
Up next, another story from our regular contributor out in
Kodiak Island in Alaska, Leslie Leland Fields. Leslie's the author
of the phenomenal book, Write Your Story, Change Your Life.
And today she shares with us a deeply personal story
about a woman who inspired one of the tales from
(00:32):
that book. Take it away, Leslie.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
The glass doors sigh open, and the attendant glances as
I enter. She nods, recognizing me, because every day for
nearly two weeks, I've been striding through those doors, past
the rows of all the residents. Most of them are
slumped over their wheelchairs. At this day, did one sad
(01:01):
man look up and wave as I passed? I've flown
down from my home in Alaska, here to Indiana to
accompany my best friend, Linda, who has stage four ovarian cancer.
But she's not in this rehab hospital for her cancer.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
She was on her way to her.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Chemo appointment when she fell face first onto her concrete driveway,
and as if to prove that suffering has no limit,
Her spine was crushed, and now she lies in that
hospital bed.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
Her face is.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Bruised, her neck held by a brace. How do we
want to live the years that we're given? Every morning
(02:02):
at home, four loons swoop in loops by the shore,
their song the voice of fog drifting across the water.
Many days I walk by them deaf, ears tuned to
the cacophony of my own worries.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
But if I stop and.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Listen to their whispering hoots, my lungs open like wings, and.
Speaker 3 (02:27):
I swear I can fly. This summer, I watched the spiders.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
I counted 14 outside my forefront windows, weaving maps and
traps of sustenance. This week, in rehab, Linda told me
about the blue jay, how it perched at her window,
peering at her solemnly for nearly.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
A half hour as she gazed back in delight.
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Each day that I'm there, we sing past the pain
and the cement walls. Our voices seeking heaven. And now
I must leave. After nearly two weeks, I have to
go back home. I'll be back, I tell her. I
(03:21):
know she has at least six more months. So I
do not expect the call that comes a week after
I leave the rehab hospital. Her hands and feet are swelling.
She's not eating. The doctor says she's nearing the end,
her brother tells me, voice thick with sorrow.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
Should I come back? No, Leslie. She's so tired. Linda
might be at peace, but I am not.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
The day after the call from her brother, I'm flying
back to Alaska, and I'm dreading the three flights that
will take until midnight. I find my seat on the
plane knowing I'm flying in.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
The wrong direction. But we don't take off.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
We end up sitting for an hour on the tarmac
till finally the pilot comes on.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
A mechanical, he tells us.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
We'll have to deplane and wait for another flight later
in the day. I'm sure my heavy heart broke the plane.
So instead of flying all day, I'm grounded all day,
just waiting in an airport terminal. I'm neither home nor
(04:48):
with Linda. Is this waiting space a purgatory? While I
am waiting and pacing, My phone rings.
Speaker 3 (05:00):
It's Linda. Her voice is weak, but it's her. Leslie,
where are you? What are you doing? How are you?
She asks, as if I'm the one pinned to a
bed and a brace. We talk now about dying. She's ready,
(05:21):
she says. She wants Jesus to take her home. She
wants to dance. I tell her it's not fair. She's
going to get there ahead of me. She's going to
learn all the cool moves before me.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
We laugh.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
We don't know how to say goodbye, but we try.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
I hang up and hold onto my phone, just pacing
the concourse, my hands knotted in prayer, but grateful prayer,
just playing over our conversation in my mind and wiping
tears that won't stop. 40 minutes go by and my
(05:56):
phone dies. rings again it's linda she has a message
to send on to all those in the writing community
that we lead together thank them would you for all
the love and support they've shown me all these last
two years and would you tell them to keep writing
their stories because they truly matter she says two calls
(06:23):
my heart is full and breaking Now, three more hours
go by. My phone rings again. Linda's voice is even weaker,
but decisive. She has one more thing to tell me. Leslie,
I've set aside money for a scholarship fund for writers,
(06:47):
for those who need to write their stories, who need
to heal like I have. This call is short. It's
the last call she makes. Three days later, Linda dies.
I was supposed to be flying. I was supposed to
be flying all day long into the night. If my
(07:07):
plane had not been grounded, I would have missed those
three calls. What a conspiracy of mercy this was for
both of us.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
And what about you? Who have you lost?
Speaker 2 (07:22):
What miracles have you seen even in the losing? Who
have you opened your heart to?
Speaker 3 (07:28):
The afflictions and.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Wonders of life have no single address nor a single tongue.
They visit and speak to us all, but no one
promises we'll be awake enough to hear it and alive
enough to answer it. We can glance at the loons
or the careful common spider in our corner window and
(07:52):
still not see.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
A rainbow appears.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Can shower prisms upon our front yard and our back
is turned.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
A call can come in from an unknown number and
we silence it.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
We can be too busy to visit a friend in
the hospital.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
We don't mean to turn away.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
We don't plan on living frantic, overscheduled lives. We've all
caught ourselves side-eyed.
Speaker 3 (08:28):
In the morning mirror wondering, who is that? How did
she get so old?
Speaker 2 (08:35):
The poet Mary Oliver writes her dying wish. When it's over,
I want to say all my life I was a
bride married to amazement. I was the bridegroom taking the
world into my arms. I do want to take the
world into my arms as long as I can. I
(08:59):
do want to stay that child bride, still married to amazement.
So I write.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
I keep on writing.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
Everywhere I go, I carry an invisible pen in my hand.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
What must be seen? What must be said? Who can
I love?
Speaker 2 (09:19):
What can I pass on of this piercing love? achingly
sacred life, so that we both, writer and reader, can
still see the spider on its silk, the blue jay
at the window, that pale man in pajamas who waved
at me, and Linda in her hospital bed. I see
(09:42):
her there still, lifting her faltering arms to hold her phone,
her swollen finger punching my number three times near the
day of her own dying. Do you see her there too?
In each of those calls, she has a message for
(10:03):
every one of us. Take the world into your arms
while you can.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
And a special thanks as always to Leslie Leland Fields
for sharing not just her friend Linda's story, but in
the end, her own, and why she writes. How do
we want to live the years we're given, she asks
early on. And the last thing that Linda did with
her life, a scholarship for writers. She tells her friend
she has set that up. She's thinking of others, even
(10:36):
in her final moments. What a great way to live.
It's what we do here on Our American Stories, what
we love doing. The story of Linda, the story of
Leslie Leland Fields, here on Our American Stories.
This is Lee Habib, and this is Our American Stories.
Up next, another story from our regular contributor out in
Kodiak Island in Alaska, Leslie Leland Fields. Leslie's the author
of the phenomenal book, Write Your Story, Change Your Life.
And today she shares with us a deeply personal story
about a woman who inspired one of the tales from
(00:32):
that book. Take it away, Leslie.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
The glass doors sigh open, and the attendant glances as
I enter. She nods, recognizing me, because every day for
nearly two weeks, I've been striding through those doors, past
the rows of all the residents. Most of them are
slumped over their wheelchairs. At this day, did one sad
(01:01):
man look up and wave as I passed? I've flown
down from my home in Alaska, here to Indiana to
accompany my best friend, Linda, who has stage four ovarian cancer.
But she's not in this rehab hospital for her cancer.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
She was on her way to her.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Chemo appointment when she fell face first onto her concrete driveway,
and as if to prove that suffering has no limit,
Her spine was crushed, and now she lies in that
hospital bed.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
Her face is.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Bruised, her neck held by a brace. How do we
want to live the years that we're given? Every morning
(02:02):
at home, four loons swoop in loops by the shore,
their song the voice of fog drifting across the water.
Many days I walk by them deaf, ears tuned to
the cacophony of my own worries.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
But if I stop and.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Listen to their whispering hoots, my lungs open like wings, and.
Speaker 3 (02:27):
I swear I can fly. This summer, I watched the spiders.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
I counted 14 outside my forefront windows, weaving maps and
traps of sustenance. This week, in rehab, Linda told me
about the blue jay, how it perched at her window,
peering at her solemnly for nearly.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
A half hour as she gazed back in delight.
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Each day that I'm there, we sing past the pain
and the cement walls. Our voices seeking heaven. And now
I must leave. After nearly two weeks, I have to
go back home. I'll be back, I tell her. I
(03:21):
know she has at least six more months. So I
do not expect the call that comes a week after
I leave the rehab hospital. Her hands and feet are swelling.
She's not eating. The doctor says she's nearing the end,
her brother tells me, voice thick with sorrow.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
Should I come back? No, Leslie. She's so tired. Linda
might be at peace, but I am not.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
The day after the call from her brother, I'm flying
back to Alaska, and I'm dreading the three flights that
will take until midnight. I find my seat on the
plane knowing I'm flying in.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
The wrong direction. But we don't take off.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
We end up sitting for an hour on the tarmac
till finally the pilot comes on.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
A mechanical, he tells us.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
We'll have to deplane and wait for another flight later
in the day. I'm sure my heavy heart broke the plane.
So instead of flying all day, I'm grounded all day,
just waiting in an airport terminal. I'm neither home nor
(04:48):
with Linda. Is this waiting space a purgatory? While I
am waiting and pacing, My phone rings.
Speaker 3 (05:00):
It's Linda. Her voice is weak, but it's her. Leslie,
where are you? What are you doing? How are you?
She asks, as if I'm the one pinned to a
bed and a brace. We talk now about dying. She's ready,
(05:21):
she says. She wants Jesus to take her home. She
wants to dance. I tell her it's not fair. She's
going to get there ahead of me. She's going to
learn all the cool moves before me.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
We laugh.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
We don't know how to say goodbye, but we try.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
I hang up and hold onto my phone, just pacing
the concourse, my hands knotted in prayer, but grateful prayer,
just playing over our conversation in my mind and wiping
tears that won't stop. 40 minutes go by and my
(05:56):
phone dies. rings again it's linda she has a message
to send on to all those in the writing community
that we lead together thank them would you for all
the love and support they've shown me all these last
two years and would you tell them to keep writing
their stories because they truly matter she says two calls
(06:23):
my heart is full and breaking Now, three more hours
go by. My phone rings again. Linda's voice is even weaker,
but decisive. She has one more thing to tell me. Leslie,
I've set aside money for a scholarship fund for writers,
(06:47):
for those who need to write their stories, who need
to heal like I have. This call is short. It's
the last call she makes. Three days later, Linda dies.
I was supposed to be flying. I was supposed to
be flying all day long into the night. If my
(07:07):
plane had not been grounded, I would have missed those
three calls. What a conspiracy of mercy this was for
both of us.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
And what about you? Who have you lost?
Speaker 2 (07:22):
What miracles have you seen even in the losing? Who
have you opened your heart to?
Speaker 3 (07:28):
The afflictions and.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Wonders of life have no single address nor a single tongue.
They visit and speak to us all, but no one
promises we'll be awake enough to hear it and alive
enough to answer it. We can glance at the loons
or the careful common spider in our corner window and
(07:52):
still not see.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
A rainbow appears.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Can shower prisms upon our front yard and our back
is turned.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
A call can come in from an unknown number and
we silence it.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
We can be too busy to visit a friend in
the hospital.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
We don't mean to turn away.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
We don't plan on living frantic, overscheduled lives. We've all
caught ourselves side-eyed.
Speaker 3 (08:28):
In the morning mirror wondering, who is that? How did
she get so old?
Speaker 2 (08:35):
The poet Mary Oliver writes her dying wish. When it's over,
I want to say all my life I was a
bride married to amazement. I was the bridegroom taking the
world into my arms. I do want to take the
world into my arms as long as I can. I
(08:59):
do want to stay that child bride, still married to amazement.
So I write.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
I keep on writing.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
Everywhere I go, I carry an invisible pen in my hand.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
What must be seen? What must be said? Who can
I love?
Speaker 2 (09:19):
What can I pass on of this piercing love? achingly
sacred life, so that we both, writer and reader, can
still see the spider on its silk, the blue jay
at the window, that pale man in pajamas who waved
at me, and Linda in her hospital bed. I see
(09:42):
her there still, lifting her faltering arms to hold her phone,
her swollen finger punching my number three times near the
day of her own dying. Do you see her there too?
In each of those calls, she has a message for
(10:03):
every one of us. Take the world into your arms
while you can.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
And a special thanks as always to Leslie Leland Fields
for sharing not just her friend Linda's story, but in
the end, her own, and why she writes. How do
we want to live the years we're given, she asks
early on. And the last thing that Linda did with
her life, a scholarship for writers. She tells her friend
she has set that up. She's thinking of others, even
(10:36):
in her final moments. What a great way to live.
It's what we do here on Our American Stories, what
we love doing. The story of Linda, the story of
Leslie Leland Fields, here on Our American Stories.
Host
Lee Habeeb
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