February 13, 2026 • 55 mins
In this episode Lunchbox and Ray talk about about the jokes that are going on non stop at Lunchbox's house with his kids. Also Lunchbox recaps his time at the Vanderbilt Basketball thanks to Mr.C's Reading Challenge and how much this "free" basketball game ended up costing the Box Family! Plus Lunchbox had a nice dinner with his wife but the waiter was driving him nuts with his over the top description of everything.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:04):
Thank you for turning on my microphone. I appreciate. How's
it feel.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Just feel a little naked, just trying to do the
video and the audio at the same time, just making
sure that that's exactly how I did it last time
when it worked.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
I mean, I think it looks great. You're going no
headphones again. You're back to this no headphones game that
drives me nuts. You're starting to remind me of Darren Peterson. Ah,
I'm gonna bring my headphones in the studio and then
not wear them. I'm gonna warm up pre game, but
then I'm not gonna play. But Kansas didn't freaking need them.
We took down number one Arizona. I didn't get to
watch it, so I don't have much to say, but
(00:40):
rock chock jack hot. At the end of the year,
I was ready to jump off the ship. I thought
Bill self has lost it, but he has put this
corps together and we are starting to march our way
to the madness call. Then c Doble a tournament and
we are hotter. Then a fire cracker, whoa pause.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
What I did want to say is, you're Peterson guy,
with this load management, It's got to stop.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
You've got to stop with your arms inside your shirt.
Can't do it, won't do it? Like you look like,
what are you doing?
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Hey?
Speaker 1 (01:18):
Do you remember that joke where you used to put
your sleeves your arms and your other sleeves and wrap
them around and tickle your back like you're making out
with someone. Do you remember that? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, I
remember that joke. That was funny.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
You remember when the guys would snap the girl's bras.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
I do remember that.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
I never could, oh never not wanted to get in trouble.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
Do you remember when you would uh get with someone
in the corner and you put your hand over their
mouth like you're making out, and people whoa with a dude? No,
you know, Jim I mere, Hey, Marco, come here.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
We just faked them. Now they all think we kiss.
Ain't funny.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
No, no, that's not what I was talking about. But
my kids are on the one of hey, spell I cup,
I seeup? Oh oh you said, I see you pere.
That's the new one. I mean it was, hey, there's
something under there?
Speaker 2 (02:19):
Underwear?
Speaker 1 (02:20):
Oh you said underwear. That's what I'm saying. That was
that was earlier this week and late last week, and
now it has shifted to hey, do you know how
to spell I? Cup? Boom got them?
Speaker 2 (02:31):
So it's in the in the halls at schools where
they're hearing this, and then they're bringing it to the house.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Bringing it to the house. Also, what's your name?
Speaker 2 (02:41):
I'm lunch box?
Speaker 1 (02:43):
No, what's your name? Gibbles? No, what's your name?
Speaker 2 (02:46):
Dad? No?
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Your name? What's your name? Ray? What's this?
Speaker 2 (02:52):
Knows?
Speaker 1 (02:53):
What am I holding? Book? What am I holding?
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Nothing?
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Ray knows nothing? Haa. We do that all day long.
That's good.
Speaker 2 (03:04):
I'm glad it's evolved from six to seven, Hey, four
to one?
Speaker 1 (03:09):
What's your name? Ray? What's the color of the sky? Mm?
Speaker 2 (03:14):
Nashville gray?
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Now? Now, what's the color of the sky blue? What's
the opposite of down?
Speaker 2 (03:20):
Not finishing it?
Speaker 1 (03:21):
Pause? No? No, what's the opposite of down?
Speaker 2 (03:25):
Blue? Job?
Speaker 1 (03:27):
What's the opposite of down? Up? Ray? Blue?
Speaker 2 (03:30):
Up?
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Okay, we do that, non freaking stop, non freaking stop.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Does the wife play along?
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Sometimes she gets annoyed? Yeah, it was fun once, Oh dude.
And then if one kid does it, guess what, the
other kid has to do it, and then the third kid.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Has to do it, and the other kids don't even
know English, do they No, they do.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
I mean the one is four or five and seven.
They all know how to talk, right, I'm learning Spanish now.
I mean my four year old and five year old
don't stop talking. Don't know where they get it from.
They just brought no NonStop.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
No idea where they get it from? God unfollowed. The
other day, a lady said that I mentioned an too
many times. She hit the unfollowed button for the sore losers.
I don't know, and I said, Dorothy, sorry to see
you go. Don't let the door hitch on the way out.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
That's a good way to respond to our sword loser's nation.
That's good.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
I'm pretty sure she was like, wow, we actually responded.
Maybe I won't unfollow that.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
Maybe that's pretty cool. Yeah. So yeah, that's what's going
on in my house. Man. We just do that over
and over and over again. It's just all day long.
But I have so much to talk about.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Well, and I wanted to thank you. So it's what
it's on the menu.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
What's on the menu.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
I would like to thank you for something. Okay, you
have got so much to talk to us about.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
Oh crap, I forgot to bring Morgan her bag I'm
gonna bring it tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
So there's a menu. We are loaded. This is a
big one. I wan if you will.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Yeah, would you like to, you know, like say thank
you to me? I don't know what it is. It's
a tease, so that's just what's it? What it's on
the menu. So do you want to tell me now
or do you want to just like wait for a
little bit. It's on the menu.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
We don't have to eat it all right now.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
I mean is it an appetizer? Is it a main course?
Is it a dessert? What is it?
Speaker 2 (05:17):
Probably an app Okay, we could intro the show and
then jump to it.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
I love it. I'll take a water, a coke and whatever.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
You want to thank me for.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
All right, We're gonna do it live. Oh the one
two dude, sore loser? What up, everybody? I am lunchbox.
I know the most about sports, so I'll give you
the sports facts, my sports opinions, because I'm pretty much
a sports genius, y'all.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
It is Sison. I'm from the North. I'm an alpha male.
I live on the North side of Nashville. Now we've
moved around. We're downtown west Side now North we got
two point three three three acres. Me and my wife.
We live in the country. We got two kids at Vanderbilt.
They're probably defrosting now that it's seventy degrees. Justin needs
that you on him, but he's in rehab. He is
on New Beginnings Avenue in Michigan. That's it over to you,
(06:06):
but then back over to me. Well done, because I
got something for you.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
So I this is very simple. I didn't even think
he was gonna be an a block, but I just
wanted to say for being accommodating. I told you I
have a tire issue, and vehicle wise, we're playing a
little bit musical chairs, if you will, musical vehicles.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
I totally understand.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
And I said, hey, can we do a little moving
around to the podcast and you accommodated.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
Can can you explain to me what is wrong with
your tire? No idea.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
It's just balding. So it's like it rubs against the
side of my vehicle. So three tires are perfect, one
of them all the way down to the inner tube.
Uh is it just.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Gonna blow on the interstate? Great? I just got blown.
But here's the problem. You have a huge tire on
the roof of your truck. No, that's just a rack.
There's not a tire up in there.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Now, that's just rack city. Is there a tire on
the bat Yeah, but doesn't match up with any the others.
I'll be all, caddywomp, What do.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
You mean it doesn't match?
Speaker 2 (07:04):
The other ones are like mud tires, And now that's
just a normal one. Got it'd probably throw off my
entire vehicle.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
So how much you think in this tire is gonna cost?
Speaker 2 (07:12):
I already got it. My guy hooked it up, four
of them for five.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Wait wait, wait you're getting You only have one bad tire,
so why are you getting four tires?
Speaker 2 (07:21):
The others are pretty worn too, But this one, for
whatever reason, whenever my baby hits the interstate, it goes
hard left and it just wears and wears and wears.
Until one day I looked at it. I said, boy,
that's missing tread. Oh whoa, that's a little bit of
an inner tube sticking out.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Whoa, that's a wire.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
I've been driving Baldy on I sixty five eighty miles
an hour for the past two months.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
That's not good because I always see those blown tires
on the side of the road, and I'm like, man,
how scary is that?
Speaker 2 (07:51):
So Okay, I'm actually glad you said that, because semis
do that, they don't die. So I'm thinking, if I
drive this vehicle and it blows, am I gonna die?
So that actually answers my questions.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
Oh, you're not a semi. Though they have eighteen wheels,
they have plenty of spares. You are down to three
and you go, does it go straight axle or does
it slowly or does the whole thing just blop? No,
it's good, but I'm just saying it's so bare.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
It's one of those basketballs we played with as a
kid that has no more tread on it. It's a
bare ball. There's no grip, it's no more ribbed.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
No, no, no, I understand what you're saying. I am asking you,
But if your tire does blue on the interstate, does
it just shoot off or is it like it comes
off and say you'll have tire left, no big deal?
Or does it go straight to the axle? Finna find out.
But what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna go in
the interstate thirty miles an hour to work. Well, I
(08:42):
don't want that. That is why I am here for you.
I don't want you to be in danger, and I'm
glad you're getting four new tires. Now? Are you getting
the big mud tires? You're just getting normal tires now.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
I don't know my guy quoted me, but I'm not
asking questions.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
If you're getting four for five. Yeah, I'm pretty sure
you're not getting the mud tires.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Might be a hook up. I have no idea, but
all I know is I said, Bazer, this is actually
a code red. I need to take your vehicle. But
you were accommodating. Thank you very much.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
You know what it used to be great when I
had a tire hookup. I had a tire hook up
for years when I was in college. My buddy David U,
he's out of El Paso, Texas, one of his fraternity brothers,
worked at a store that I think is no longer
in business called Sears, and he would tell you, hey, man,
(09:31):
just pull up at the back door, right. You know
what they say, Sears are for deers. So I would
pull up at the back door, hand them three hundred hp.
He'd put four tires in the car. You drive off,
and you got to go pay someone to put him
on like a little shop. But dude, he would slide
him right out the door.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
Because he was able. He knew where there's the excess tires.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
And he knew like when they were coming into the
warehouse or whatever the you know, automotive department of sears,
he would just add four tires didn't get there.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Yeah. And also here we get extra merch. We could
give people merch easily. Everybody knows at their job where
there's loose ends, if you will, some fat on the
cutting room, flore all of that.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
Yeah. And then over at a discount tire man, I
had like three dudes, three dudes a discount tire. Josh
Martin which speaking of Josh played on my soccer team
growing up, Like we played soccer together from the age
of like thirteen. Maybe you guys played foot see no,
and we got him on our team. He had a
(10:32):
mohawk and Henry rest in peace. Henry was like, we
need to get that guy on just for some toughness.
He's no longer with us now. Henry passed about a
year ago.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
When we are telling these stories now and some of
them include they're no longer with us, that's when we
know we're getting older.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
Yeah, that's what's rough. That's a tough thing to do.
But I was going through my phone the other day
because it was saying I was out of storage, and
I came to some text messages from Josh and I
was like, man, I haven't heard from Martin in a while.
So I hit him up. I was like, oh, Josh,
how you been? And I got a reply not Josh's
phone number. I am a drug dealer, so I'm like, oh,
(11:11):
so I don't know what happened to Martin. Man, I
haven't heard from him. I hope he's okay. Yeah, it
was just weird. But anyway, back to my story.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
Yes, so joh left your own story.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
So Josh worked a discount tire. I was so rudely
interrupted by myself and I met his when he worked there.
He had a dude named Justin that worked with him.
They would hook me up. And then there was another
guy that our old intern, her brother, worked at Discount Tire.
I think it's a paramedic now, but he would hook
it up with tires. Like when I was moving to Nashville,
(11:41):
you told me I stopped by Discount Tire right there
on I thirty five and got tires.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
You hit me up before I left town. You go,
do you need tires? And I said, no, what are
you talking about? You go, I got a tire hook
up if you want it, and I go, aren't we
just going from Texas to Tennessee? What do you mean
new tires? I'm not like breaking ground in the Oregon Trail.
And You're like, I've got a hookup if you need tires.
Speaker 1 (12:04):
I believe his name was Chad Smith, if that was correct.
But yeah, I had tire hookups. Man, it was the
greatest thing ever. And so now I'm glad you have
a tire hookup. I got a tire guy because I
don't have a tire guy anymore. I go have lunch
with him. We wine and dine. He gets me out
four for five.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
That's pretty good. So I'm excited. But it props to
me for noticing it. Man, I mean, but but then
it's the American way. Am I gonna get it towed? No?
Speaker 1 (12:30):
No, that would cost money.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Am I gonna drive on it with the potential of
one of them blowing?
Speaker 1 (12:36):
Yes? Well, you really only have the potential of one
to blow.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Right, But I'm saying if it blows and it blows
me so hard I get injured.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
It's like that on a roll when you blow.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
That's what I'm you said semis, So now I think
semis are usually upright. The tire just blows. It's not
like it's a bomb. This has been going through my head.
You're helping me actually understand this.
Speaker 1 (12:55):
Please talk to me about what goes through your head.
Speaker 2 (12:57):
So, if this tire was to explode, is it like
a bomb or is it just an immediate Oh no,
there goes my tire. I get off the road. Let's
get it towed. I think I can get away with
it for forty five minutes driving down a road thirty
miles an hour, get it to where it needs to go,
risking at the risk of it blowing and getting injured.
But I mean, oh man, I injured my foot. I
(13:18):
was trying to save a two hundred dollars tow job.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
Yeah. I don't think you have to worry about it.
I don't think you need to go thirty. I would
like to then go thirty. Dude, you do you. I
just want you to feel safe because we need you
here to do the pod tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
But hey, that same car that you were offering tires
too in Texas. Is the same car I drive today? Yeah,
that's how loyal am twenty years Wow.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Yeah, ultimately you know the one that that was the
car that had the tires in Austin now just sits
in front of my house and doesn't do anything. It
just sits there and grows weeds.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
Yeah, there is something about keeping old cars. We used
to joke back at Mike Miller's place because Mike Miller
would always have the BMW's and the Escalades. And then
I had the same vehicle, the Trailblazer, and Billy had
I want to say, a newer Acura, but it wasn't.
It was like it was gold. I mean it was nice,
but his was he. We called it to pop Up,
(14:17):
and then we called mine the RV because it just
looked like we were a couple of homeless people pulling
into Mike Miller's every weekend. But now Billy's onto Porsches
and all kinds of things and jet skis and motor
boat and all that.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
But i'd motor boat also.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
I am still in the Trailblazer from the days where
he would drive the pop up and we'd go to
the every weekend to the RV Park, which was actually
a really nice condo complex in Austin.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
That's pretty cool because, like I mean, chess Day's dad
had this old beat up truck when we were younger,
and he got in a wreck and he was trying
to get it to like because he was a surveyor
and so he was.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
He drove all over WHOA did the tire blow?
Speaker 1 (14:54):
No, And I think he was trying to get it
to five hundred thousand.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Maybe I've made that mileage up. That could be just
an absolute, maybe three hundred thousand, I don't know what
it was.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
Maybe might have been how many women he'd slept with,
but he'd gotten a wreck.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Ray that number was significantly lower. They gotten a wreck
and they wanted to total his car, the truck. They
were gonna gi him four hundred bucks for it, and
he said, uh, no, thank you. He brought it home.
In the front of it. We got a crowbar and
started pulling the metal out so he could still drive
(15:28):
it because he was only going to give the four.
He was only going to get the four. And he
was like, man, I'm trying to get to a certain
one hundred thousand miles.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
Dude. The thing that I'm not getting is you kept
driving your vehicle after was totaled.
Speaker 1 (15:40):
Yeah, you can still drive them, right, But I mean,
why not safe? Though?
Speaker 2 (15:44):
I think that's what it is in retrospect. Should you
have just never turned it in?
Speaker 1 (15:49):
No? I should have, oh, because I mean, like I
could feel the wind coming in the back of the vehicle. Oh.
I checked the rear view mirror. Rear view mirror was
still good. But the back hatch was so dented in
that there was a space between the bumper and the
back hatch. So win would.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
Could you have gotten the check without handing over the car?
Speaker 1 (16:13):
You can get like ten thousand dollars less than they
were offering you, Like, you could take the wrecked car
and get fifteen thousand dollars or you can get twenty
five thousand dollars.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
I would have done wreck car and got to fifteen
thousand dollars. Check.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Well, I don't know if it was safe to drive.
Speaker 2 (16:29):
Oh that's right. You got a family, my bad?
Speaker 1 (16:31):
Yeah, yeah, and we'll take a break. And speaking of
my family, I got some stories about them right after
this ray.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
Seriously, that blown out tire, that's nothing to mess with.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
I got a tire guy.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Dude, will you ask some of your tire people?
Speaker 1 (16:44):
I will. If I could text Josh, I would.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Man the one wrong number guy say hey, well do
you got to google? What do you think can my
buddy drive on a bad tire? Hey?
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Well, Josh used to work a discount tires, So that's
why I was hitting them up. I was wondering, could
you answer my question about tires?
Speaker 2 (16:58):
All the technological advances, and they don't just kill our
numbers off, like you could still text. Like this other
person that used to have my number, this lancing number.
I get text from her all the time. Hey you
owe mortgage. I'm like, wrong person. I don't live in Michigan,
so weird, right, And so people that have my old number,
my friends will text them. So those numbers just never
die off. They have to stay in the system. Weird.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
That is strange, Like once that person gets rid of
that number, it should delete from your phone.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
It doesn't because I get it from all the time.
This lady in East Lansing, she owed a back pay
on mortgages. She owed whatever one of those rent things
are where you get a storage locker that she never
paid for. There's all this crap she owes, and she
gets texts all the time about it.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
Huh, that is weird. But anyway, so this weekend man
Friday night, kids school was like, Hey, we will take
your kids and keep them here till eight thirty for free.
I said, awesome. Told the wife, I said, we are
going out to dinner. We are going to a restaurant
where we don't have to worry about screaming kids, kids,
(18:00):
we don't have to worry about spilled milk. We can
just sit there, relax, eat some nice food. Cookout on
West End. No, not cookout now were we wanted a
waiter experience, waiter waitress.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Sometimes they'll come and get the trash off the table.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
That's pretty good, but they don't come and take your order.
You got to go to them to give your order.
So we walk into this place and I'm my heck yeah.
We show up and the ladies like, can I pour
you a welcome cocktail? I'm like, uh sure, I'm going
to need the address. Oh yeah, And she's like, we
have our homemade apple cider with some spicy something blah
(18:37):
blah blah. Yeah sounds great. She puts it in a
little cup cheers we drink. Was she hot? She was
all right. I wouldn't say not, but I wouldn't say hot.
She's all right.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Male or female.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
When it's a she, it's a female, okay. And so
we go and they take us out and we sit
on the little patios, freezing cold. But they had heaters,
so it's awesome. Great. We have the whole patio to ourself.
No one else out there. Hmm. I think we were
one of those last minute reservations, you know, where everything
else was booked up. So we were outside got it, yeah,
(19:10):
because we booked it on like Thursday. And uh so
we sit down, we are looking at the menu. The
waiter comes over and gives me this spiel about how
everything works. There's this, there's that. You want to order this,
you want to order that, you want to try this,
you want to try that that. That's how you get
the most bang for your buck.
Speaker 2 (19:26):
QR code COVID times no, he and it is a
real menu. Always got to love that. Oh you just
pull out your phone in QR coded. I'm old school.
Speaker 1 (19:34):
Give me a menu.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
I want to touch it. I want to touch some grass.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Can I tell you I would rather have a menu
in my hands. QR code. Yeah, let me do. Let
me what do I do? Put the flash flight on? Hey? Hey,
like I get it during COVID times, Like you want
to do the QR code. But now that we're back,
let let's let's hand people the menu. I want to
hold the menu.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
Not to take from your story, I refuse to if
they don't give me the menu, baser, what should I get?
I'm not pulling up on my she picks out my
food for me. Do you have an espresso martini? Give
me something close to that? Right right, I'm not going
to key in my QR code. I don't do that. Uh.
Do you guys have like a bread as an app?
Speaker 1 (20:12):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (20:12):
Yeah, we'll do that. Cool.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Oh, I don't is it on the menu?
Speaker 2 (20:15):
I don't know. I didn't look at it. I'm not
QR coding it. Just get me something.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Yeah. I mean, we have a problem in this society
about being on our phones too much. And then I'm
at a restaurant and I'm supposed to conversate with the
people at the table, if it's my wife, if it's
a group of friends, whatever it is, and you want
me to pull out my phone and look up your menu.
That's the exact opposite of what I want to do.
And it's not pulling up right away, it's it's loading.
(20:39):
I'm sorry, no reception man like you guys got Wi Fi? Like,
what's going on? Guys?
Speaker 2 (20:44):
Got anything crazy? What's on the menu? You should just
like tell us wait for it to load. A little bit.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
Water on the menu, or got a QR code? Can?
Can I bor your phone? What I need to get
in the QR code? No, I'm the waiter. I don't
give a damn give your phone anyway. He starts going
over some of the stuff and he tells me, oh,
that right there, that will change your life. I'm like, really,
that item on your menu is going to change my life.
(21:12):
I know what it was. Go ahead, sex on the beach. No.
And I was like, okay, I'll take some of that.
Give me some of that and he brings it out,
take a bite. My wife's like, what do you think?
I said? It's good. She goes, does it change your life?
Speaker 2 (21:29):
Nope?
Speaker 1 (21:31):
Now my life is still the same. I tasted something decent,
but my life is no way changed. It's not something
that it's gonna like six months for now. I'm gonna
be like, oh my god, remember when I had that
and it changed my life? No, I didn't. All right, cool,
so let me, you know, bring out some other items.
We eat and then Donny whipped cream. It is near
Valentine's Day. This one pasta comes out and it's like
(21:52):
a pesto pasta. Did you go to Italy? No? And
take a few bites, you know, I mean that's pretty good.
Comes back over, he's like, what do you think of
the pasta? Well? Who is this? Guys? I'm alli a
thank you? Get lost? This is no the way he
was talking, dude, would I killed the guy? Hey, you're
(22:13):
about to kill them? You're about to kill him?
Speaker 2 (22:16):
I don't know. I threw it in my mouth and
ate it. What do you want? Give me another drink?
Speaker 1 (22:20):
Barkeep and I'm like all right, you know whatever. Comes
over and I'm eating some of the pasta. You know,
it's pesto pasta kinda. He's like, what do you think?
And my wife and I are both like, it's pretty good,
you know what I mean? Like I like the you know,
the taste like has a little bit of taste of
walnut because they had some walnut in there or something.
And he goes, I know everybody you know can be
(22:41):
a little intimidated by it when they read it on
the menu. But I gotta say, it's very approachable. This
guy serious, what are you michelin Man. I'm like, what
the hell do you mean approachable? I approached it like
I have approached, like I see this, I see this pasta,
(23:05):
And you think I'm gonna be intimidated. I'm not gonna
approach it. It's like it's too standoffish, like where you
are now free to approach the pasta. Yeah, it is approachable.
It has a The apasta has a very open mind.
It is very approachable. It's open to new people. The
apasta has approacheth my mouth hah, And I'm just like
(23:28):
And she walks away, and my wife listen to me.
She goes, don't don't. I'm like, what. She goes, You're
gonna make fun of him for saying approachable. And I said, absolutely,
I'm gonna make fun of him for saying approachable. What
the hell does that mean? How is food approachable?
Speaker 2 (23:44):
I no longer want the address.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
You don't want the address. So then we eat, you know,
we finish up, and he's like, I'm just gonna drop
by the dessert menu. You know what I mean. There's
no pressure, there's no rush. I'm just gonna tell you
that we have this this, and then we have this
tearram asuit. And oh, if you say you don't like
Tara Massoux, this is totally different. It's made differently, and
I'm gonna tell you that Tira Masoux will change your life.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
I'm gonna need that address again. And once he said
I love Taramasou, Oh do you I'm back in.
Speaker 1 (24:14):
I am not a Terra Masoux fan. But once he said,
your wife put me in the fridge. Once he said
that it was going to change my life. You know what,
I knew that I didn't need to order it because
I already had something on the menu earlier that he
said was going to change my life. And it didn't
change my life. So his life and my life are
completely different.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
What was the first thing, the eggs? I totally didn't
even hear the first thing.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
It was something called sea urchin. I don't even know
what that is.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
Okay, So sea urchin, pasta and Taramasoux. Those are the
only three things you guys got.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
No, we got other things. But he didn't say they
would change my life. He didn't say that it was approachable.
These are the three notable items that he said were
going to change our perspective on the world. You ever
heard of pizza burgers? Yeah, we have, but we can
do that with the kids. You can't go to like
a sit down restaurant that has sea urchin. I don't
(25:05):
even know. And he told me, uh yeah, it's the
sea urchin that will change your life. And so he
walked away. So I looked at the menu. Dude, I
read it. I flipped it over. That's all. My wife said,
I don't even see sea urchin on here. She looks
(25:25):
at it, flips it over, and she didn't see sea
urchin on there.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Off the menu pricing. That's why you gotta go to
my spot cookout. Bro.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
No, hey, you guys are hey, man.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
What's up. I'll get you out right now. Yeah, just
come on front.
Speaker 1 (25:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
I love that place.
Speaker 1 (25:40):
Oh yeah yeah, just be a second one, all right, man,
Well that's not how this guy talks.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Yeah, put some chili. Oh you want me put some
chili on top of that? Yeah, just do like the
dog and then the chili dog.
Speaker 1 (25:50):
And then he says, yeah, man, yeah, there's this chili dog.
It's real approachable. Ah.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
He doesn't hit you with that. He just goes, you
can approach the drive through. Man' at you that right now?
Speaker 1 (26:01):
And then no, it's about to get it's you. It's
about to hit the fan.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
They talk like that because it's like two am, and
they literally hate every drunk person in that line.
Speaker 1 (26:13):
Oh for for sure. So I know I'm not ordering
the terra masou because that ain't gonna change my life,
just like the sea urchin. But anyway, when he came back,
I was like, hey, man, I gotta be honest with you.
I don't even see sea urchin on your menu. And
he goes, oh no, no, it's over here. It's called unie. Man. Well,
then why didn't you tell me that unie would change
my life? Why did you say sea orch He goes,
(26:33):
it's just another term for it.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
We call it unie because it makes you go ooh me,
So get the hell away from my wife, sir.
Speaker 1 (26:43):
We order a piece of cheesecake. Cool. Eat The cheesecake
is fine, nothing great, nothing amazing. Thought the terra Masou. No, No,
he wanted me to because it was going to change
my life. That's two items on one menu that's going
to change my life. I already had the first, didn't
change my life, No need to try the second. His
taste bud They're obviously different than my taste buds. And
(27:03):
I wasn't gonna check his taste buds out once again.
I already did it once, not doing it twice. It
sounds like the.
Speaker 2 (27:08):
Type of guy that's coming around to your table and
he's giving your wife a massage as he's talking to you.
Speaker 1 (27:12):
He might have I don't know. It was dark, dark,
dimly lit, dimly lit. For sure, there was a candle.
There was a candle, And so I'm like, all right,
you know what, hey put your sea arch in a
way we ate the chase gate right, all right, man,
we'll take the bill. Thank you. Brings it over and
he goes, I'm just gonna leave this right here. There's
(27:33):
no rush, there's no hurry. I appreciate the time you
guys gave me tonight, he goes, and I gotta be honest,
you guys killed it.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
Is this the most polite guy in America?
Speaker 1 (27:44):
No, no, no, it's about to get better. You're complimenting me.
He was like, you guys, killed it. You know you
I brought different foods. You guys were open.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
Minded and whoa pause? What do you mean open mind?
He trying to hook up my wife?
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Unpaused, and I'm like, okay, he's like And I just
got to say, you guys were my first table tonight
and you guys were incredible. You guys have set the
tone for a magnificent evening for me. Thank you for
bringing that kind of energy. Oh my gosh, please shut up.
Please tell this guy to shut up. And I'm like,
I'm never coming back here again. How did you even
(28:24):
deal with that? Oh? Hey, dude, I couldn't.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
I couldn't have went a straight face, especially after a
drake got to be like is this guy serious?
Speaker 1 (28:31):
I thought he was just I was like, is this
for real? And like there was one time? There was
one time? Right, he brings us out this one appetizer
or something I don't know, and he puts this the
silverware out there, puts a knife out there, and then
he comes back when we're done, and I never even
touched the knife, and he cleared the table, picked up
(28:51):
the knife and put down clean silverware, the exact same
kind of knife. And I said isn't that just the
same exact night. He goes, Yeah, but my boss would
kill me if I didn't give you a new one.
I didn't even touch the old one, man, I haven't
even touched it. A little bit of grease on it.
(29:12):
But yeah, man, you guys. I really appreciate you guys
bringing that energy. You guys really started my evening off great,
a fantastic table and have really just like invigorated the
night and the rest of the table. So far, it's
been splendid. But it couldn't have been splendid without you
guys starting out the evening the way you did.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
At this point, I'd have been like, you know what,
we actually are in a rush? There's you said, there's
no rush. There is a rush. Our uber just got here.
See you later. And that's when we walked out, We're
going to cookout. I looked at my wife I got
as we get in the car, and I said.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
What the f did he mean? Approachable? And I said,
and we set the tone for the night. She goes, Okay,
that may have been a little over the top.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
That dude wanted your wife.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
That was our Friday night. Man, I know where you went.
You might know.
Speaker 2 (30:01):
Is it the melting pot place where they put uh no,
they put cocoa and stuff on marshmallows.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
Nope, that wasn't it. They put cheese on bread. Nope,
we'll take a break. We'll right back.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
That was good man. And then but that just gave
me a great idea. There was an old place I
used to throw it back with the old lady.
Speaker 1 (30:27):
But it was in Bellevue.
Speaker 2 (30:30):
And I don't want to.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Drive all the way there, oh man, not on that
tire it was. They're not driving on that tire. I'm
just warning you. It was to get there. That reminds
me that was a good spot. And I went for.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
Valentine's Day what was it called Man Sperry's. Yeah, but
I'm never getting in.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
We had reservations weeks ahead of time. Well anyway, So
then Saturday comes along, Man, it's time for basketball.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
Mistersees Basketball Challenge.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
We're not at Mister C's Reading Challenge. We're not there yet.
We're at the kids basketball game. So the two younger ones,
baby Box two and three, are on the same team.
They play at one o'clock. Baby Box one plays at
one thirty separate gyms. So with the Vandy game for
(31:22):
mister Seas Reading Challenge starts at two thirty, so we
are gonna be booking it. We gotta be moving fast, no, dilly,
No doubtly. So we drop off Mom and baby Box
one at his game at twelve thirty, even though it's
not till one thirty, and we drive over to the
other gymnasium for the one o'clock showdown for the New
(31:46):
Jersey Nets versus whoever we're playing. And we get there
and there's like ten minutes left in the game before ours.
So the boys are dribbling their basketball around the gym
and this guy gets up from the scores table sprints
across the gym. Hey, hey, no bouncing the basketballs What?
(32:14):
No bouncing basketball is in here? Last I looked, this
is a basketball court. It's too distracting for who the players?
(32:34):
You mean the four or five and six year olds
that are playing that don't even know we're in this gym. Yeah. No,
no bouncing the basketball is in the gym. I'm never
having kids. See, I would never run into this. I said, oh, hey, guys, sorry,
I know you're about to play a basketball game, but
you're not allowed to bounce the basketballs in the basketball gym. Sorry,
I'm sure that went overwhell yeah, that lasted about thirty seconds.
(32:59):
Dude got back to the table and kids, what do
they do? They forget things, they forget their mind gets distracted.
They start leaking, They start doing bounce passes back and forth.
And he stands up at the scores.
Speaker 2 (33:17):
Here we go, old man River.
Speaker 1 (33:19):
And I'm thinking, oh, great, here he comes. He's gonna
sprint across. Instead, he stands up and he gives the
throat slash. No, no, no no. I taped the kids. Hey, guys,
you gotta quit, you gotta quit, and they quit, and
I was just like, wow, who knew dribbling basketballs in
(33:41):
a gym.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
Will distract other people? Dribbling the basketball.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
Correct, really just gonna screw with everybody?
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Cool?
Speaker 1 (33:48):
All right, no problem. We have the game and we
get our first win of the season. Baby box two,
Baby box two with four baskets? What is he?
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Peterson?
Speaker 1 (34:01):
Uh? And he he did get tackled three times breakaways.
He was going for the.
Speaker 2 (34:07):
Hoop and sounds like Piston's hornets the other night.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
And kids were just tackling from behind. They didn't another
team they were They thought they were on the grid iron.
They were getting ready for Super Bowl Sunday. They didn't
know what they were doing. They were pretty physical, but
we won the game. So then we immediately get the
car drive over to the other gymnasium.
Speaker 2 (34:25):
That was the purpose of dropping them off thirty minutes
before the game.
Speaker 1 (34:28):
Yes, that way we could get over there before their
game ended. So right when they're done, they can hop
in the car and we can book it to mister
Reading Challenge. So we get in the car and we
er baby Box one lost the game. That's a mute
mute point. It doesn't really matter, and we're driving. Was
(34:52):
your your game of Vandy? Uh, mister C's Reading Challenge
was at Vandy. Get ready.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
They ask you for your COVID card every time when
Justin goes there.
Speaker 1 (35:01):
And so the game starts at two point thirty. We
get in the car at two to oh eight. Now,
my guys, we gotta go. We have got to move.
No Delhi, no Dally. So we're you know, we'erving and
you know, we took ways because we wanted to see
(35:21):
if there was any back way. We didn't want to
hit traffic. I mean, yeah, it's only Nashville. You did
know every back road, but yeah, but you don't know
which way the traffic is gonna be coming for the
big game Vandy versus Oklahoma.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
Ray, we tried to make it through the Sorority row,
quite the shortcut I found. Yeah, ladies, love what you're
doing for the campus.
Speaker 1 (35:41):
So mister C's Reading Challenge had already promised me free tickets,
free tickets for my kids reading three hundred minutes in
the month of January, and ended up there were no
free tickets and we paid one hundred and sixty dollars. Okay, cool.
So we're one hundred and sixty dollars in and we
hadn't even got there yet, and we pull up to
the parking garage and it says forty dollars to park,
(36:09):
forty dollars to park for a Vandy basketball game. M hmm,
my god. And I'm like, well, now we're two hundred
in and we haven't stepped foot in the arena.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
Yeah, that's we're gonna They're gonna get you. It's called fleecing. Oh.
Speaker 1 (36:30):
And I pull up and I roll down the window.
The lady's like, that'll be forty dollars and she go,
I go discount for future students genius. And this was
her reaction, that'll be forty dollars, blows right through it.
All right, cool, handle the credit card, she taps it.
(36:51):
You should have thrown Justin's name out there. And she said,
all right, feel free to park anywhere.
Speaker 2 (36:56):
Oh, he was dishonorably discharged.
Speaker 1 (36:58):
She said feel free to park anywhere. I said, oh,
here's good. I put it in park, literally at the entrance,
literally at the entrance, literally did not move an inch.
And I throw it in bark and I started to unbuckle.
And this is her reaction. You can go in, sir.
(37:21):
You didn't even pull in. I didn't even pull in.
I didn't even pull in. See to me, that is hilarious, dude.
She was really ready to kill you. Oh she was
ready to kill me. I mean, my one joke doesn't land.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
So you hit her with here's good, you better laugh
next time.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
She just tells me you can go in. You stop
in line in park. I did not put it in park.
I literally put it in park in the seatbelt off.
And she was not having any of my jokes. Doesn't
enjoy my humor. I'm like, all right, cool, that's cool,
all right, so we go. We're going up the garage.
(38:03):
Find a parking spot on the fourth level, right next
to the elevator. Get down, get over to the stadium.
There's it's cold as all get out, and we get there.
We walk in and the guys like, you know where
you're going, and me being cocky, old Cockerson, you're still
cocking it. Hell yeah, I go, oh yeah, we just
(38:23):
go here to the right and we go up. So
we go to the right, go up. Our seats are
on the other side the stadium.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
Oh man, oh man, you should have told me you
were a doctor. I thought that's shir what you're gonna
hit me with.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
Ah man, So we gotta go back down. I'm a
doctor here you're wearing a ratted sweatshirt. After walking up
to the third floor of this freaking arena. A lot
of stairs. Gotta go back down, and then we gotta
go around the stadium. Then the kids are hungry, so
I'm all right, let's get some food.
Speaker 2 (38:52):
And that stadium's tight when you're trying to move in
and around.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
Yeah, it's not a very it's very narrow, narrow, always
a lot of people, like.
Speaker 2 (39:01):
A mouse trap for adults. Yes, you get trapped in there.
And then I know Ray in the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (39:07):
We can hear it in quarter the opening tip off happening,
and we're still not to our seats. Is it a trough, No,
they had an individual jurnal. But it is tight. It
is tight. They are there, they are They get them
all the way. Like people coming out of the stalls
are hitting you with the door as you're at the urinal.
What you're working with? Mark? Oh hey, Joe, Oh god,
the dang door hit me in the back. Man, it's
(39:29):
pete all in my hand. It's really annoying. But they
like it. It's like a cool stadium. It is pretty.
There's not a bad seat. Those your trunk hang low,
does it? Wabble floor doesn't wash your hands? Boys? And
so then the boys are hungry. So then I go
up to the registrano. I'm like, all right, I need
an order of two orders of chicken tenders. I need
(39:51):
a hot dog, I need a pretzel. Oh I'm sorry, sir,
we don't have any tenders at this station. You have
to go right over there.
Speaker 2 (39:58):
You gotta get the tend's.
Speaker 1 (40:00):
But it says Tendy's on your menu right there. Yeah, yeah,
but we're not. We don't have them at this You
got to go over there to order the Tendys.
Speaker 2 (40:05):
You're not authorized to sell them.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
Oh my gosh. So I just waited in line for
Tendy's and you guys don't have Tendy's. This is great.
So we turn around and we walk across. I need
two baskets Attendy's. It's amazing. A hot dog six seven bucks,
Tendy's fourteen dollars. What three Tendy's and some potato chips
fourteen freaking dollars, high demand premium meat. And then we
(40:29):
got to get water because the kids haven't drink at anything,
so four bottles of water, so that'd be fifty eight dollars.
So now we are two hundred and fifty eight dollars
into this freaking event that was supposed to be free.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
We always had a rule waters only. Pops was never
getting us stuff.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
Oh no, no, Well we hadn't eat and lunch, and
they just had basketball games were they were hungry.
Speaker 2 (40:52):
Dad would get one lemonade and you can refill it
in the water fountain and the lemonade sugar will still
be in there.
Speaker 1 (40:58):
So it makes about three cups oh, and so I'm
just like, god, dang, this is this is the worst
game of my life. Like, we spent so much freaking
money to go to this Mister Sas Reading challenge, and
then we're at the top of the top. Man, we
are way up there in the arena. We get to
the seats. Finally we get there. We sit down baby
(41:19):
box three. I got a poo poo. Okay, seriously, we
just got here. We just got here. And here's the
cool thing about this arena. When you go up to
the third floor, there are no bathrooms up there, so
you gotta go down to the second floor. And you
know the cool thing about this arena wood No, I
was twelve rows up. You know the cool thing about
(41:41):
this arena is there are no bathrooms on the second floor,
so you gotta go down all the way down to
the first floor to go to the bathroom. So after
climbing all those stairs, you gotta go back down and
then back. I mean, awesome.
Speaker 2 (41:55):
You know what our flaw was when me and Justin
went what we sat seats for perverd We sat in
somebody else's seats. We sat in the band section. Oh yeah,
these are ours? Uh No, they're not. That's where the
band sits. You got us. They were perfect seats, though,
(42:17):
justin of all the seats we picked, where the freaking
band sits.
Speaker 1 (42:20):
Dude, you idiot one of the kids, as you pick
one of the thirty seats, are there? All right? Yeah,
we're lying, all right? Those aren't your seats? Yeah they are,
that's where the team sits. I was wondering why there
was a pad. Pretty comfy, those are good. I was
wondering why there was a white board. I thought I
was writing messages. I wonder why my seat was sponsored.
(42:43):
I get it. Let's go stack owls. So my wife
takes them down to the bathrooms. I was like, I
ain't going. My name's Benn, and I'm not in it.
And so we sit there and we start the game,
and of course we're by none of the kids at
the school because we had to buy our So wherever
the free seats were for mister C's reading challenge, they
(43:05):
weren't near us. Jeez. And let me tell you, they're
just benches, so there's no back, so you're just sitting there,
and as you get older, you want backs on your seat. Guys.
I'm just telling you it's just more comfortable. And let
me tell you, these kids are exhausted. They are laying
on the benches, they're laying on the bleachers, they're laying
(43:25):
in your lap, and Vanderbilt is proceeding to get their
butts kicked. Really, they were getting stomped. Three for Oklahoma,
three for Oklahoma, three for Oklahoma. It was like twenty
four to six right out the gate. That's rare, They're good.
(43:45):
It was so ugly. Then here comes Vandy. They make
a run, get it to twenty four seventeen. Then they
go on a run and I think it happened was
forty one twenty seven or something like that Oklahoma. And
we're like, wow, all right, cool. Then they're doing pictures
on the jumbo tron, like, oh and scan this QR
(44:08):
code and you can send us your picture. You brought
it all the way back around. And what shocking is
oh I thought you.
Speaker 2 (44:16):
Said started the third quarter or no, okay, sorry guys,
that wasn't the end of the pod.
Speaker 1 (44:20):
There's baby boxes teacher on the jumbo troll.
Speaker 2 (44:24):
Here we go.
Speaker 1 (44:25):
He's like, Dad, she's here. Can we go look for.
Speaker 2 (44:32):
No, I'm not looking for your teacher.
Speaker 1 (44:35):
What do you mean Williams. You mean out of these
this whole arena. You want me to walk around and
look for your teacher, and then, yes, what happens when
we find your teacher. We have the world's most awkward
conversation because I know once we find your teacher, you're
just gonna be like clam clam. So halftime boy. So
(44:57):
he's like, Dad, we gotta we gotta do that. We
gotta put our picture up there. All right, I'll bite,
I'll bite, I'll fall for it. I won't take a selfie.
So everybody gathers in boom selfie. All right, cool, and
I send it that way and he's like, it's halftime.
So let's go to the bathroom and on our way down,
guess what second level he walks in and looks at
(45:18):
all the sections. All right, Dad, I don't see her
in here. We get down the first floor. He goes in,
looks at all the sections, Dad, I don't see her.
Walk by the concessions. He's like, Dad, I don't see
my teacher.
Speaker 2 (45:32):
You'll see her Monday.
Speaker 1 (45:33):
I was like, He's like, where do you think she is?
Was like, I don't know, Bud, I don't know. So
we go in and go to the bathroom. He's like,
should we walk around and look for I'm like, no,
we shouldn't. We should go back to our seat because
the second half is going to start.
Speaker 2 (45:46):
Finally you're being a parent.
Speaker 1 (45:48):
But he's like, before we go, Dad walks in the
first level, looks again, doesn't find her. We get to
the second level. He walks in there, looks around. I
don't see her. Dad go up to the third level.
He's looking around. He goes, I don't think she's sitting
up here with us.
Speaker 2 (46:05):
Dad.
Speaker 1 (46:07):
So we sit back down and it's the start of
the second half, and I'll tell you all about it.
Right after this second half, more of the same, Vandy
getting smoked, Vandy getting crushed. And then they had a
promotion that was the most ridiculous promotion I've ever seen.
(46:30):
Give us your kid, no, usually if you put it
the length of the court and you make it in
that little hole, yeah, you get like free scholarship for
a year, a free car.
Speaker 2 (46:42):
Agreed.
Speaker 1 (46:44):
And they pull it out and they're like, if you
get it in that little hole, youet Justin's old job.
You get a five hundred dollars certificate to where and
I'm like, this dude is gonna put the ball the
length of the court and put it a little hole,
and you're gonna give him five hundred dollars.
Speaker 2 (47:04):
Please tell me it's for the restaurant you guys went
to to get Sea her Chin.
Speaker 1 (47:08):
No Ray, that wud have been a hell of a
story if they would have told me for five hundred dollars,
I gotta hit it, though, I would have swung it
like a driver.
Speaker 2 (47:16):
I mean maybe if it's like Larry Flynn's Stripper Club.
Speaker 1 (47:19):
Anyway, I just found that ridiculous. But anyway, more, the
second half just absolutely a butt kicking. And every time
out they're showing pictures on the jumbo tron and they
ain't showing ours, and my kids feelings are starting to
get hurt. And as we I forgot when we were
walking in guess who we saw bones mister C, the
(47:40):
scam artist. Yeah, and he was walking down the hall
and the kids were like, Dad, that's mister C. I'm like, hey,
you owe me a couple dollars.
Speaker 2 (47:50):
Mister C.
Speaker 1 (47:50):
That's when I shoved him against the wall. Said, hey,
you said there was me free tickets, Now give me
your pocket book. But I was like, yeah, that's mister C.
The one that problems was free tickets for mister C
reading challenge. There was nothing free. What was he wearing?
Snake oil and a briefcase? Yeah he was. He looked
very shady. Let me tell you you got my money there.
(48:12):
See he was writing checks. That is at mouth good gash.
I'll tell you that. Man. Was it one of those
crypto kids? Man? So anyway, it is a blowout. The
kids look like they're about to fall asleep on the benches.
Speaker 2 (48:25):
And I was gonna say, you don't need to tell
us the score. Somebody can look up the score. Guys.
The game happened like a week ago.
Speaker 1 (48:30):
We're now by like eighteen with like eight minutes to go,
and I'm like, hey, you guys want to leave? Well
cut to the chase.
Speaker 2 (48:35):
Did they win?
Speaker 1 (48:36):
I was like, you guys ready to go? Like, why
don't we go?
Speaker 2 (48:39):
Because Andy win?
Speaker 1 (48:40):
Because we had a birthday party. We were going that night,
the wife and I at five thirty and I'm like,
this game is a blowout, let's go ahead and go.
You guys look dead. There's you're not even interested in
the game. Work no, dad, Dad, I earned these tickets
I think we should stay t the end.
Speaker 2 (48:54):
Did they win?
Speaker 1 (48:55):
Okay, I'm trying. I was like, you know, I have
a friend named Ray. He has a theory ALI always
leave early so we can beat the traffic. Your kids
knew about it, and they're like, no, dabt, I want
to stay. And I'm like, oh my gosh, this is
so boring. It is so miserable. Five minutes left, they're
down fifteen points and the nicking a. The kids are
(49:16):
falling asleep, and I'm like, guys, let's just go. Let's
just go. No, I don't well, okay, I don't want tears.
I don't want tears.
Speaker 2 (49:25):
Please tell me Vandy made a run.
Speaker 1 (49:27):
I don't want tears. Wife takes one of the kids
to the bathroom. Middle kid to the bathroom. She goes,
She texted me, She goes, should we just leave? Everybody's leaving?
Why don't we just leave? Tell the boys we're leaving.
It's like four minutes, thirty seconds to go, down thirteen
fourteen points. I say, hey, boys, we're gonna leave. Mom's
ready to go. Dad, the game's not over yet. We
don't we can't leave yet, I text, I said, even
(49:50):
though they're about to fall asleep. They look very uninterested.
They're refusing to budge from their seats. Tell him to
sound the buzzer and I'll come back up, and I
mean it clears out, and don't worry. They're still not
showing our picture on the jumboch on that I submitted
to this little QR code, and that is making my
kids upset.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
They need to do it for the parents where they
put zeros on the scoreboard just for a minute so
parents can usher their kids out.
Speaker 1 (50:16):
And with two minutes left, there may be fifty five
people in that arena, and Vandy drains a three. Then
they get a steal and they drain a three, and
now we're down to a minute twenty seconds led, and
we're down by eleven, and we start fouling. I'm like,
what the hell are we doing? We are just delaying
(50:36):
this game. Can we please? It is now four forty eight.
We're supposed to pick up the babysitter at five point fifteen.
We're supposed to be at the birthday party at five
point thirty. We're supposed to make an app. Everybody's supposed
to bring an app for the birthday party. That's the
it's gonna be like a pot luck app dinner. Bring
sea or chin, It'll change your life. Approach this, hey, Sarah,
(51:00):
trying to approach this, and Oklahoma goes down, makes one
of two free throws. Here comes Vandy. They drain a three,
down eight, Oh freak yeah, and I'm like, oh my gosh,
now the boys are up. Now the boys are up.
Oh look our pictures on the jumbbotron. Oh our picture
still not on the JumboTron. Man, still not on the
jumbo tron. But I'm telling you, they start screaming and
(51:26):
when they're shooting free throws, miss it. Oklahoma miss is
two free throws.
Speaker 2 (51:31):
I thought I heard them on Sports Center.
Speaker 1 (51:33):
Bandy hits a three. We're down five with thirty eight
seconds to go, Are you freaking kidding me? Go doors,
and we foul. They make one of two, so we're
down six. Come down, make a three and a foul.
It's gotta be that little kid. He is lights out.
We made a three and we're fouled. We go to
(51:54):
the line, make it four point play. We're down two
with how much left? Twenty seven seconds? Yeah, let's go,
and then it gets crazy like we foul. They make
a free throw. We come down, we miss, and it
goes out of bounds. So they're trying to inbound the
ball and they just throw it straight out of bounds.
(52:14):
They don't. They never get it, like no one. And
then we turn it over on the inbounds and then
we get it to within two. Then it's within three,
and then we come down with a chance to tie
the game down three. We miss, they get it, we
found them. They make both free throws. We make it three.
At the end, we lose by one. Ah, we lose
(52:35):
by one. Freaking kidd me, no but me harassing my kid,
saying we should leave early. And it turns out the
game actually got pretty good. He was screaming his head off,
he was going crazy. He was red in the face,
(52:57):
and I felt bad telling them we should leave early.
They're saying, let's go babie later. Look at them, dude,
he's red in the face. There's no one there. Oh yeah,
(53:21):
good call. Oh man. And we lost by one, all right, man,
hell of a story. I think we all lost by
one there. Yeah, we lost two hundred and fifty six dollars.
Speaker 2 (53:32):
We've approached the end and it was time to go.
Speaker 1 (53:35):
Home, man, Time to go home. Thanks a lot, mister
Cees reading challenge. There was nothing free about the day.
There was absolutely nothing free about it. Well he's heading
off to another campus. Well, we did get free orange
or gold palm palms that the kids shook.
Speaker 2 (53:55):
Those were for the girls.
Speaker 1 (53:57):
And then they wore they acted like there was their hair,
and then they were doing it like it was my hair,
and then it was my wife's hair.
Speaker 2 (54:06):
And then don't do that to your dad.
Speaker 1 (54:07):
They were covering their face with it and saying, dad, Dad,
where'd I go? Did you lose me? And then they went, oh,
I'm still here. So we did that a lot. Yeah,
and then we went to the and then we brought
the pomp poms home with us. The next day we
had to go to the grocery store and they ended
up pushing little kids carts around, so they had brought
(54:28):
the pomp poms in the store with them. Then I
had to carry them. So I did it like I
was directing planes through the airport, and we were doing
that through the grocery store. This way, this way, this way.
Just follow the pump poms. You got to bring those
of the big show.
Speaker 2 (54:41):
That'd be funny. Direct people in the studio.
Speaker 1 (54:43):
Hey, hey this way, Amy, Amy, come here, feeling things.
Come here, feeling yourself, feeling yourself. Take it personally, Take
it personally.
Speaker 2 (54:51):
Construction workers, you help them out with traffic.
Speaker 1 (54:53):
Oh man? Yeah, what a weekend. Man. I didn't even
get to tell you about the birthday party. I'll tell
you about that on Friday, maybe if you can carry.
Speaker 2 (55:02):
I'm as tired as your kids right now.
Speaker 1 (55:04):
Yeah, all right, let's go home. Man.
Speaker 2 (55:07):
I'm gonna leave a minute early.
Speaker 1 (55:09):
Hopefully that was all right. Change your life, didn't it
Thank you for turning on my microphone. I appreciate. How's
it feel.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Just feel a little naked, just trying to do the
video and the audio at the same time, just making
sure that that's exactly how I did it last time
when it worked.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
I mean, I think it looks great. You're going no
headphones again. You're back to this no headphones game that
drives me nuts. You're starting to remind me of Darren Peterson. Ah,
I'm gonna bring my headphones in the studio and then
not wear them. I'm gonna warm up pre game, but
then I'm not gonna play. But Kansas didn't freaking need them.
We took down number one Arizona. I didn't get to
watch it, so I don't have much to say, but
(00:40):
rock chock jack hot. At the end of the year,
I was ready to jump off the ship. I thought
Bill self has lost it, but he has put this
corps together and we are starting to march our way
to the madness call. Then c Doble a tournament and
we are hotter. Then a fire cracker, whoa pause.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
What I did want to say is, you're Peterson guy,
with this load management, It's got to stop.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
You've got to stop with your arms inside your shirt.
Can't do it, won't do it? Like you look like,
what are you doing?
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Hey?
Speaker 1 (01:18):
Do you remember that joke where you used to put
your sleeves your arms and your other sleeves and wrap
them around and tickle your back like you're making out
with someone. Do you remember that? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, I
remember that joke. That was funny.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
You remember when the guys would snap the girl's bras.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
I do remember that.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
I never could, oh never not wanted to get in trouble.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
Do you remember when you would uh get with someone
in the corner and you put your hand over their
mouth like you're making out, and people whoa with a dude? No,
you know, Jim I mere, Hey, Marco, come here.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
We just faked them. Now they all think we kiss.
Ain't funny.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
No, no, that's not what I was talking about. But
my kids are on the one of hey, spell I cup,
I seeup? Oh oh you said, I see you pere.
That's the new one. I mean it was, hey, there's
something under there?
Speaker 2 (02:19):
Underwear?
Speaker 1 (02:20):
Oh you said underwear. That's what I'm saying. That was
that was earlier this week and late last week, and
now it has shifted to hey, do you know how
to spell I? Cup? Boom got them?
Speaker 2 (02:31):
So it's in the in the halls at schools where
they're hearing this, and then they're bringing it to the house.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Bringing it to the house. Also, what's your name?
Speaker 2 (02:41):
I'm lunch box?
Speaker 1 (02:43):
No, what's your name? Gibbles? No, what's your name?
Speaker 2 (02:46):
Dad? No?
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Your name? What's your name? Ray? What's this?
Speaker 2 (02:52):
Knows?
Speaker 1 (02:53):
What am I holding? Book? What am I holding?
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Nothing?
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Ray knows nothing? Haa. We do that all day long.
That's good.
Speaker 2 (03:04):
I'm glad it's evolved from six to seven, Hey, four
to one?
Speaker 1 (03:09):
What's your name? Ray? What's the color of the sky? Mm?
Speaker 2 (03:14):
Nashville gray?
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Now? Now, what's the color of the sky blue? What's
the opposite of down?
Speaker 2 (03:20):
Not finishing it?
Speaker 1 (03:21):
Pause? No? No, what's the opposite of down?
Speaker 2 (03:25):
Blue? Job?
Speaker 1 (03:27):
What's the opposite of down? Up? Ray? Blue?
Speaker 2 (03:30):
Up?
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Okay, we do that, non freaking stop, non freaking stop.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Does the wife play along?
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Sometimes she gets annoyed? Yeah, it was fun once, Oh dude.
And then if one kid does it, guess what, the
other kid has to do it, and then the third kid.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Has to do it, and the other kids don't even
know English, do they No, they do.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
I mean the one is four or five and seven.
They all know how to talk, right, I'm learning Spanish now.
I mean my four year old and five year old
don't stop talking. Don't know where they get it from.
They just brought no NonStop.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
No idea where they get it from? God unfollowed. The
other day, a lady said that I mentioned an too
many times. She hit the unfollowed button for the sore losers.
I don't know, and I said, Dorothy, sorry to see
you go. Don't let the door hitch on the way out.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
That's a good way to respond to our sword loser's nation.
That's good.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
I'm pretty sure she was like, wow, we actually responded.
Maybe I won't unfollow that.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
Maybe that's pretty cool. Yeah. So yeah, that's what's going
on in my house. Man. We just do that over
and over and over again. It's just all day long.
But I have so much to talk about.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Well, and I wanted to thank you. So it's what
it's on the menu.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
What's on the menu.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
I would like to thank you for something. Okay, you
have got so much to talk to us about.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
Oh crap, I forgot to bring Morgan her bag I'm
gonna bring it tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
So there's a menu. We are loaded. This is a
big one. I wan if you will.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Yeah, would you like to, you know, like say thank
you to me? I don't know what it is. It's
a tease, so that's just what's it? What it's on
the menu. So do you want to tell me now
or do you want to just like wait for a
little bit. It's on the menu.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
We don't have to eat it all right now.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
I mean is it an appetizer? Is it a main course?
Is it a dessert? What is it?
Speaker 2 (05:17):
Probably an app Okay, we could intro the show and
then jump to it.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
I love it. I'll take a water, a coke and whatever.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
You want to thank me for.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
All right, We're gonna do it live. Oh the one
two dude, sore loser? What up, everybody? I am lunchbox.
I know the most about sports, so I'll give you
the sports facts, my sports opinions, because I'm pretty much
a sports genius, y'all.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
It is Sison. I'm from the North. I'm an alpha male.
I live on the North side of Nashville. Now we've
moved around. We're downtown west Side now North we got
two point three three three acres. Me and my wife.
We live in the country. We got two kids at Vanderbilt.
They're probably defrosting now that it's seventy degrees. Justin needs
that you on him, but he's in rehab. He is
on New Beginnings Avenue in Michigan. That's it over to you,
(06:06):
but then back over to me. Well done, because I
got something for you.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
So I this is very simple. I didn't even think
he was gonna be an a block, but I just
wanted to say for being accommodating. I told you I
have a tire issue, and vehicle wise, we're playing a
little bit musical chairs, if you will, musical vehicles.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
I totally understand.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
And I said, hey, can we do a little moving
around to the podcast and you accommodated.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
Can can you explain to me what is wrong with
your tire? No idea.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
It's just balding. So it's like it rubs against the
side of my vehicle. So three tires are perfect, one
of them all the way down to the inner tube.
Uh is it just.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Gonna blow on the interstate? Great? I just got blown.
But here's the problem. You have a huge tire on
the roof of your truck. No, that's just a rack.
There's not a tire up in there.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Now, that's just rack city. Is there a tire on
the bat Yeah, but doesn't match up with any the others.
I'll be all, caddywomp, What do.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
You mean it doesn't match?
Speaker 2 (07:04):
The other ones are like mud tires, And now that's
just a normal one. Got it'd probably throw off my
entire vehicle.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
So how much you think in this tire is gonna cost?
Speaker 2 (07:12):
I already got it. My guy hooked it up, four
of them for five.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Wait wait, wait you're getting You only have one bad tire,
so why are you getting four tires?
Speaker 2 (07:21):
The others are pretty worn too, But this one, for
whatever reason, whenever my baby hits the interstate, it goes
hard left and it just wears and wears and wears.
Until one day I looked at it. I said, boy,
that's missing tread. Oh whoa, that's a little bit of
an inner tube sticking out.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Whoa, that's a wire.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
I've been driving Baldy on I sixty five eighty miles
an hour for the past two months.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
That's not good because I always see those blown tires
on the side of the road, and I'm like, man,
how scary is that?
Speaker 2 (07:51):
So Okay, I'm actually glad you said that, because semis
do that, they don't die. So I'm thinking, if I
drive this vehicle and it blows, am I gonna die?
So that actually answers my questions.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
Oh, you're not a semi. Though they have eighteen wheels,
they have plenty of spares. You are down to three
and you go, does it go straight axle or does
it slowly or does the whole thing just blop? No,
it's good, but I'm just saying it's so bare.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
It's one of those basketballs we played with as a
kid that has no more tread on it. It's a
bare ball. There's no grip, it's no more ribbed.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
No, no, no, I understand what you're saying. I am asking you,
But if your tire does blue on the interstate, does
it just shoot off or is it like it comes
off and say you'll have tire left, no big deal?
Or does it go straight to the axle? Finna find out.
But what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna go in
the interstate thirty miles an hour to work. Well, I
(08:42):
don't want that. That is why I am here for you.
I don't want you to be in danger, and I'm
glad you're getting four new tires. Now? Are you getting
the big mud tires? You're just getting normal tires now.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
I don't know my guy quoted me, but I'm not
asking questions.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
If you're getting four for five. Yeah, I'm pretty sure
you're not getting the mud tires.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Might be a hook up. I have no idea, but
all I know is I said, Bazer, this is actually
a code red. I need to take your vehicle. But
you were accommodating. Thank you very much.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
You know what it used to be great when I
had a tire hookup. I had a tire hook up
for years when I was in college. My buddy David U,
he's out of El Paso, Texas, one of his fraternity brothers,
worked at a store that I think is no longer
in business called Sears, and he would tell you, hey, man,
(09:31):
just pull up at the back door, right. You know
what they say, Sears are for deers. So I would
pull up at the back door, hand them three hundred hp.
He'd put four tires in the car. You drive off,
and you got to go pay someone to put him
on like a little shop. But dude, he would slide
him right out the door.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
Because he was able. He knew where there's the excess tires.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
And he knew like when they were coming into the
warehouse or whatever the you know, automotive department of sears,
he would just add four tires didn't get there.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Yeah. And also here we get extra merch. We could
give people merch easily. Everybody knows at their job where
there's loose ends, if you will, some fat on the
cutting room, flore all of that.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
Yeah. And then over at a discount tire man, I
had like three dudes, three dudes a discount tire. Josh
Martin which speaking of Josh played on my soccer team
growing up, Like we played soccer together from the age
of like thirteen. Maybe you guys played foot see no,
and we got him on our team. He had a
(10:32):
mohawk and Henry rest in peace. Henry was like, we
need to get that guy on just for some toughness.
He's no longer with us now. Henry passed about a
year ago.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
When we are telling these stories now and some of
them include they're no longer with us, that's when we
know we're getting older.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
Yeah, that's what's rough. That's a tough thing to do.
But I was going through my phone the other day
because it was saying I was out of storage, and
I came to some text messages from Josh and I
was like, man, I haven't heard from Martin in a while.
So I hit him up. I was like, oh, Josh,
how you been? And I got a reply not Josh's
phone number. I am a drug dealer, so I'm like, oh,
(11:11):
so I don't know what happened to Martin. Man, I
haven't heard from him. I hope he's okay. Yeah, it
was just weird. But anyway, back to my story.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
Yes, so joh left your own story.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
So Josh worked a discount tire. I was so rudely
interrupted by myself and I met his when he worked there.
He had a dude named Justin that worked with him.
They would hook me up. And then there was another
guy that our old intern, her brother, worked at Discount Tire.
I think it's a paramedic now, but he would hook
it up with tires. Like when I was moving to Nashville,
(11:41):
you told me I stopped by Discount Tire right there
on I thirty five and got tires.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
You hit me up before I left town. You go,
do you need tires? And I said, no, what are
you talking about? You go, I got a tire hook
up if you want it, and I go, aren't we
just going from Texas to Tennessee? What do you mean
new tires? I'm not like breaking ground in the Oregon Trail.
And You're like, I've got a hookup if you need tires.
Speaker 1 (12:04):
I believe his name was Chad Smith, if that was correct.
But yeah, I had tire hookups. Man, it was the
greatest thing ever. And so now I'm glad you have
a tire hookup. I got a tire guy because I
don't have a tire guy anymore. I go have lunch
with him. We wine and dine. He gets me out
four for five.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
That's pretty good. So I'm excited. But it props to
me for noticing it. Man, I mean, but but then
it's the American way. Am I gonna get it towed? No?
Speaker 1 (12:30):
No, that would cost money.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Am I gonna drive on it with the potential of
one of them blowing?
Speaker 1 (12:36):
Yes? Well, you really only have the potential of one
to blow.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Right, But I'm saying if it blows and it blows
me so hard I get injured.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
It's like that on a roll when you blow.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
That's what I'm you said semis, So now I think
semis are usually upright. The tire just blows. It's not
like it's a bomb. This has been going through my head.
You're helping me actually understand this.
Speaker 1 (12:55):
Please talk to me about what goes through your head.
Speaker 2 (12:57):
So, if this tire was to explode, is it like
a bomb or is it just an immediate Oh no,
there goes my tire. I get off the road. Let's
get it towed. I think I can get away with
it for forty five minutes driving down a road thirty
miles an hour, get it to where it needs to go,
risking at the risk of it blowing and getting injured.
But I mean, oh man, I injured my foot. I
(13:18):
was trying to save a two hundred dollars tow job.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
Yeah. I don't think you have to worry about it.
I don't think you need to go thirty. I would
like to then go thirty. Dude, you do you. I
just want you to feel safe because we need you
here to do the pod tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
But hey, that same car that you were offering tires
too in Texas. Is the same car I drive today? Yeah,
that's how loyal am twenty years Wow.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Yeah, ultimately you know the one that that was the
car that had the tires in Austin now just sits
in front of my house and doesn't do anything. It
just sits there and grows weeds.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
Yeah, there is something about keeping old cars. We used
to joke back at Mike Miller's place because Mike Miller
would always have the BMW's and the Escalades. And then
I had the same vehicle, the Trailblazer, and Billy had
I want to say, a newer Acura, but it wasn't.
It was like it was gold. I mean it was nice,
but his was he. We called it to pop Up,
(14:17):
and then we called mine the RV because it just
looked like we were a couple of homeless people pulling
into Mike Miller's every weekend. But now Billy's onto Porsches
and all kinds of things and jet skis and motor
boat and all that.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
But i'd motor boat also.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
I am still in the Trailblazer from the days where
he would drive the pop up and we'd go to
the every weekend to the RV Park, which was actually
a really nice condo complex in Austin.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
That's pretty cool because, like I mean, chess Day's dad
had this old beat up truck when we were younger,
and he got in a wreck and he was trying
to get it to like because he was a surveyor
and so he was.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
He drove all over WHOA did the tire blow?
Speaker 1 (14:54):
No, And I think he was trying to get it
to five hundred thousand.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Maybe I've made that mileage up. That could be just
an absolute, maybe three hundred thousand, I don't know what
it was.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
Maybe might have been how many women he'd slept with,
but he'd gotten a wreck.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Ray that number was significantly lower. They gotten a wreck
and they wanted to total his car, the truck. They
were gonna gi him four hundred bucks for it, and
he said, uh, no, thank you. He brought it home.
In the front of it. We got a crowbar and
started pulling the metal out so he could still drive
(15:28):
it because he was only going to give the four.
He was only going to get the four. And he
was like, man, I'm trying to get to a certain
one hundred thousand miles.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
Dude. The thing that I'm not getting is you kept
driving your vehicle after was totaled.
Speaker 1 (15:40):
Yeah, you can still drive them, right, But I mean,
why not safe? Though?
Speaker 2 (15:44):
I think that's what it is in retrospect. Should you
have just never turned it in?
Speaker 1 (15:49):
No? I should have, oh, because I mean, like I
could feel the wind coming in the back of the vehicle. Oh.
I checked the rear view mirror. Rear view mirror was
still good. But the back hatch was so dented in
that there was a space between the bumper and the
back hatch. So win would.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
Could you have gotten the check without handing over the car?
Speaker 1 (16:13):
You can get like ten thousand dollars less than they
were offering you, Like, you could take the wrecked car
and get fifteen thousand dollars or you can get twenty
five thousand dollars.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
I would have done wreck car and got to fifteen
thousand dollars. Check.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Well, I don't know if it was safe to drive.
Speaker 2 (16:29):
Oh that's right. You got a family, my bad?
Speaker 1 (16:31):
Yeah, yeah, and we'll take a break. And speaking of
my family, I got some stories about them right after
this ray.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
Seriously, that blown out tire, that's nothing to mess with.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
I got a tire guy.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Dude, will you ask some of your tire people?
Speaker 1 (16:44):
I will. If I could text Josh, I would.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Man the one wrong number guy say hey, well do
you got to google? What do you think can my
buddy drive on a bad tire? Hey?
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Well, Josh used to work a discount tires, So that's
why I was hitting them up. I was wondering, could
you answer my question about tires?
Speaker 2 (16:58):
All the technological advances, and they don't just kill our
numbers off, like you could still text. Like this other
person that used to have my number, this lancing number.
I get text from her all the time. Hey you
owe mortgage. I'm like, wrong person. I don't live in Michigan,
so weird, right, And so people that have my old number,
my friends will text them. So those numbers just never
die off. They have to stay in the system. Weird.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
That is strange, Like once that person gets rid of
that number, it should delete from your phone.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
It doesn't because I get it from all the time.
This lady in East Lansing, she owed a back pay
on mortgages. She owed whatever one of those rent things
are where you get a storage locker that she never
paid for. There's all this crap she owes, and she
gets texts all the time about it.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
Huh, that is weird. But anyway, so this weekend man
Friday night, kids school was like, Hey, we will take
your kids and keep them here till eight thirty for free.
I said, awesome. Told the wife, I said, we are
going out to dinner. We are going to a restaurant
where we don't have to worry about screaming kids, kids,
(18:00):
we don't have to worry about spilled milk. We can
just sit there, relax, eat some nice food. Cookout on
West End. No, not cookout now were we wanted a
waiter experience, waiter waitress.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Sometimes they'll come and get the trash off the table.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
That's pretty good, but they don't come and take your order.
You got to go to them to give your order.
So we walk into this place and I'm my heck yeah.
We show up and the ladies like, can I pour
you a welcome cocktail? I'm like, uh sure, I'm going
to need the address. Oh yeah, And she's like, we
have our homemade apple cider with some spicy something blah
(18:37):
blah blah. Yeah sounds great. She puts it in a
little cup cheers we drink. Was she hot? She was
all right. I wouldn't say not, but I wouldn't say hot.
She's all right.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Male or female.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
When it's a she, it's a female, okay. And so
we go and they take us out and we sit
on the little patios, freezing cold. But they had heaters,
so it's awesome. Great. We have the whole patio to ourself.
No one else out there. Hmm. I think we were
one of those last minute reservations, you know, where everything
else was booked up. So we were outside got it, yeah,
(19:10):
because we booked it on like Thursday. And uh so
we sit down, we are looking at the menu. The
waiter comes over and gives me this spiel about how
everything works. There's this, there's that. You want to order this,
you want to order that, you want to try this,
you want to try that that. That's how you get
the most bang for your buck.
Speaker 2 (19:26):
QR code COVID times no, he and it is a
real menu. Always got to love that. Oh you just
pull out your phone in QR coded. I'm old school.
Speaker 1 (19:34):
Give me a menu.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
I want to touch it. I want to touch some grass.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Can I tell you I would rather have a menu
in my hands. QR code. Yeah, let me do. Let
me what do I do? Put the flash flight on? Hey? Hey,
like I get it during COVID times, Like you want
to do the QR code. But now that we're back,
let let's let's hand people the menu. I want to
hold the menu.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
Not to take from your story, I refuse to if
they don't give me the menu, baser, what should I get?
I'm not pulling up on my she picks out my
food for me. Do you have an espresso martini? Give
me something close to that? Right right, I'm not going
to key in my QR code. I don't do that. Uh.
Do you guys have like a bread as an app?
Speaker 1 (20:12):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (20:12):
Yeah, we'll do that. Cool.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Oh, I don't is it on the menu?
Speaker 2 (20:15):
I don't know. I didn't look at it. I'm not
QR coding it. Just get me something.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Yeah. I mean, we have a problem in this society
about being on our phones too much. And then I'm
at a restaurant and I'm supposed to conversate with the
people at the table, if it's my wife, if it's
a group of friends, whatever it is, and you want
me to pull out my phone and look up your menu.
That's the exact opposite of what I want to do.
And it's not pulling up right away, it's it's loading.
(20:39):
I'm sorry, no reception man like you guys got Wi Fi? Like,
what's going on? Guys?
Speaker 2 (20:44):
Got anything crazy? What's on the menu? You should just
like tell us wait for it to load. A little bit.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
Water on the menu, or got a QR code? Can?
Can I bor your phone? What I need to get
in the QR code? No, I'm the waiter. I don't
give a damn give your phone anyway. He starts going
over some of the stuff and he tells me, oh,
that right there, that will change your life. I'm like, really,
that item on your menu is going to change my life.
(21:12):
I know what it was. Go ahead, sex on the beach. No.
And I was like, okay, I'll take some of that.
Give me some of that and he brings it out,
take a bite. My wife's like, what do you think?
I said? It's good. She goes, does it change your life?
Speaker 2 (21:29):
Nope?
Speaker 1 (21:31):
Now my life is still the same. I tasted something decent,
but my life is no way changed. It's not something
that it's gonna like six months for now. I'm gonna
be like, oh my god, remember when I had that
and it changed my life? No, I didn't. All right, cool,
so let me, you know, bring out some other items.
We eat and then Donny whipped cream. It is near
Valentine's Day. This one pasta comes out and it's like
(21:52):
a pesto pasta. Did you go to Italy? No? And
take a few bites, you know, I mean that's pretty good.
Comes back over, he's like, what do you think of
the pasta? Well? Who is this? Guys? I'm alli a
thank you? Get lost? This is no the way he
was talking, dude, would I killed the guy? Hey, you're
(22:13):
about to kill them? You're about to kill him?
Speaker 2 (22:16):
I don't know. I threw it in my mouth and
ate it. What do you want? Give me another drink?
Speaker 1 (22:20):
Barkeep and I'm like all right, you know whatever. Comes
over and I'm eating some of the pasta. You know,
it's pesto pasta kinda. He's like, what do you think?
And my wife and I are both like, it's pretty good,
you know what I mean? Like I like the you know,
the taste like has a little bit of taste of
walnut because they had some walnut in there or something.
And he goes, I know everybody you know can be
(22:41):
a little intimidated by it when they read it on
the menu. But I gotta say, it's very approachable. This
guy serious, what are you michelin Man. I'm like, what
the hell do you mean approachable? I approached it like
I have approached, like I see this, I see this pasta,
(23:05):
And you think I'm gonna be intimidated. I'm not gonna
approach it. It's like it's too standoffish, like where you
are now free to approach the pasta. Yeah, it is approachable.
It has a The apasta has a very open mind.
It is very approachable. It's open to new people. The
apasta has approacheth my mouth hah, And I'm just like
(23:28):
And she walks away, and my wife listen to me.
She goes, don't don't. I'm like, what. She goes, You're
gonna make fun of him for saying approachable. And I said, absolutely,
I'm gonna make fun of him for saying approachable. What
the hell does that mean? How is food approachable?
Speaker 2 (23:44):
I no longer want the address.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
You don't want the address. So then we eat, you know,
we finish up, and he's like, I'm just gonna drop
by the dessert menu. You know what I mean. There's
no pressure, there's no rush. I'm just gonna tell you
that we have this this, and then we have this
tearram asuit. And oh, if you say you don't like
Tara Massoux, this is totally different. It's made differently, and
I'm gonna tell you that Tira Masoux will change your life.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
I'm gonna need that address again. And once he said
I love Taramasou, Oh do you I'm back in.
Speaker 1 (24:14):
I am not a Terra Masoux fan. But once he said,
your wife put me in the fridge. Once he said
that it was going to change my life. You know what,
I knew that I didn't need to order it because
I already had something on the menu earlier that he
said was going to change my life. And it didn't
change my life. So his life and my life are
completely different.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
What was the first thing, the eggs? I totally didn't
even hear the first thing.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
It was something called sea urchin. I don't even know
what that is.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
Okay, So sea urchin, pasta and Taramasoux. Those are the
only three things you guys got.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
No, we got other things. But he didn't say they
would change my life. He didn't say that it was approachable.
These are the three notable items that he said were
going to change our perspective on the world. You ever
heard of pizza burgers? Yeah, we have, but we can
do that with the kids. You can't go to like
a sit down restaurant that has sea urchin. I don't
(25:05):
even know. And he told me, uh yeah, it's the
sea urchin that will change your life. And so he
walked away. So I looked at the menu. Dude, I
read it. I flipped it over. That's all. My wife said,
I don't even see sea urchin on here. She looks
(25:25):
at it, flips it over, and she didn't see sea
urchin on there.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Off the menu pricing. That's why you gotta go to
my spot cookout. Bro.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
No, hey, you guys are hey, man.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
What's up. I'll get you out right now. Yeah, just
come on front.
Speaker 1 (25:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
I love that place.
Speaker 1 (25:40):
Oh yeah yeah, just be a second one, all right, man,
Well that's not how this guy talks.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Yeah, put some chili. Oh you want me put some
chili on top of that? Yeah, just do like the
dog and then the chili dog.
Speaker 1 (25:50):
And then he says, yeah, man, yeah, there's this chili dog.
It's real approachable. Ah.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
He doesn't hit you with that. He just goes, you
can approach the drive through. Man' at you that right now?
Speaker 1 (26:01):
And then no, it's about to get it's you. It's
about to hit the fan.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
They talk like that because it's like two am, and
they literally hate every drunk person in that line.
Speaker 1 (26:13):
Oh for for sure. So I know I'm not ordering
the terra masou because that ain't gonna change my life,
just like the sea urchin. But anyway, when he came back,
I was like, hey, man, I gotta be honest with you.
I don't even see sea urchin on your menu. And
he goes, oh no, no, it's over here. It's called unie. Man. Well,
then why didn't you tell me that unie would change
my life? Why did you say sea orch He goes,
(26:33):
it's just another term for it.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
We call it unie because it makes you go ooh me,
So get the hell away from my wife, sir.
Speaker 1 (26:43):
We order a piece of cheesecake. Cool. Eat The cheesecake
is fine, nothing great, nothing amazing. Thought the terra Masou. No, No,
he wanted me to because it was going to change
my life. That's two items on one menu that's going
to change my life. I already had the first, didn't
change my life, No need to try the second. His
taste bud They're obviously different than my taste buds. And
(27:03):
I wasn't gonna check his taste buds out once again.
I already did it once, not doing it twice. It
sounds like the.
Speaker 2 (27:08):
Type of guy that's coming around to your table and
he's giving your wife a massage as he's talking to you.
Speaker 1 (27:12):
He might have I don't know. It was dark, dark,
dimly lit, dimly lit. For sure, there was a candle.
There was a candle, And so I'm like, all right,
you know what, hey put your sea arch in a
way we ate the chase gate right, all right, man,
we'll take the bill. Thank you. Brings it over and
he goes, I'm just gonna leave this right here. There's
(27:33):
no rush, there's no hurry. I appreciate the time you
guys gave me tonight, he goes, and I gotta be honest,
you guys killed it.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
Is this the most polite guy in America?
Speaker 1 (27:44):
No, no, no, it's about to get better. You're complimenting me.
He was like, you guys, killed it. You know you
I brought different foods. You guys were open.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
Minded and whoa pause? What do you mean open mind?
He trying to hook up my wife?
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Unpaused, and I'm like, okay, he's like And I just
got to say, you guys were my first table tonight
and you guys were incredible. You guys have set the
tone for a magnificent evening for me. Thank you for
bringing that kind of energy. Oh my gosh, please shut up.
Please tell this guy to shut up. And I'm like,
I'm never coming back here again. How did you even
(28:24):
deal with that? Oh? Hey, dude, I couldn't.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
I couldn't have went a straight face, especially after a
drake got to be like is this guy serious?
Speaker 1 (28:31):
I thought he was just I was like, is this
for real? And like there was one time? There was
one time? Right, he brings us out this one appetizer
or something I don't know, and he puts this the
silverware out there, puts a knife out there, and then
he comes back when we're done, and I never even
touched the knife, and he cleared the table, picked up
(28:51):
the knife and put down clean silverware, the exact same
kind of knife. And I said isn't that just the
same exact night. He goes, Yeah, but my boss would
kill me if I didn't give you a new one.
I didn't even touch the old one, man, I haven't
even touched it. A little bit of grease on it.
(29:12):
But yeah, man, you guys. I really appreciate you guys
bringing that energy. You guys really started my evening off great,
a fantastic table and have really just like invigorated the
night and the rest of the table. So far, it's
been splendid. But it couldn't have been splendid without you
guys starting out the evening the way you did.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
At this point, I'd have been like, you know what,
we actually are in a rush? There's you said, there's
no rush. There is a rush. Our uber just got here.
See you later. And that's when we walked out, We're
going to cookout. I looked at my wife I got
as we get in the car, and I said.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
What the f did he mean? Approachable? And I said,
and we set the tone for the night. She goes, Okay,
that may have been a little over the top.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
That dude wanted your wife.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
That was our Friday night. Man, I know where you went.
You might know.
Speaker 2 (30:01):
Is it the melting pot place where they put uh no,
they put cocoa and stuff on marshmallows.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
Nope, that wasn't it. They put cheese on bread. Nope,
we'll take a break. We'll right back.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
That was good man. And then but that just gave
me a great idea. There was an old place I
used to throw it back with the old lady.
Speaker 1 (30:27):
But it was in Bellevue.
Speaker 2 (30:30):
And I don't want to.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Drive all the way there, oh man, not on that
tire it was. They're not driving on that tire. I'm
just warning you. It was to get there. That reminds
me that was a good spot. And I went for.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
Valentine's Day what was it called Man Sperry's. Yeah, but
I'm never getting in.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
We had reservations weeks ahead of time. Well anyway, So
then Saturday comes along, Man, it's time for basketball.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
Mistersees Basketball Challenge.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
We're not at Mister C's Reading Challenge. We're not there yet.
We're at the kids basketball game. So the two younger ones,
baby Box two and three, are on the same team.
They play at one o'clock. Baby Box one plays at
one thirty separate gyms. So with the Vandy game for
(31:22):
mister Seas Reading Challenge starts at two thirty, so we
are gonna be booking it. We gotta be moving fast, no, dilly,
No doubtly. So we drop off Mom and baby Box
one at his game at twelve thirty, even though it's
not till one thirty, and we drive over to the
other gymnasium for the one o'clock showdown for the New
(31:46):
Jersey Nets versus whoever we're playing. And we get there
and there's like ten minutes left in the game before ours.
So the boys are dribbling their basketball around the gym
and this guy gets up from the scores table sprints
across the gym. Hey, hey, no bouncing the basketballs What?
(32:14):
No bouncing basketball is in here? Last I looked, this
is a basketball court. It's too distracting for who the players?
(32:34):
You mean the four or five and six year olds
that are playing that don't even know we're in this gym. Yeah. No,
no bouncing the basketball is in the gym. I'm never
having kids. See, I would never run into this. I said, oh, hey, guys, sorry,
I know you're about to play a basketball game, but
you're not allowed to bounce the basketballs in the basketball gym. Sorry,
I'm sure that went overwhell yeah, that lasted about thirty seconds.
(32:59):
Dude got back to the table and kids, what do
they do? They forget things, they forget their mind gets distracted.
They start leaking, They start doing bounce passes back and forth.
And he stands up at the scores.
Speaker 2 (33:17):
Here we go, old man River.
Speaker 1 (33:19):
And I'm thinking, oh, great, here he comes. He's gonna
sprint across. Instead, he stands up and he gives the
throat slash. No, no, no no. I taped the kids. Hey, guys,
you gotta quit, you gotta quit, and they quit, and
I was just like, wow, who knew dribbling basketballs in
(33:41):
a gym.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
Will distract other people? Dribbling the basketball.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
Correct, really just gonna screw with everybody?
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Cool?
Speaker 1 (33:48):
All right, no problem. We have the game and we
get our first win of the season. Baby box two,
Baby box two with four baskets? What is he?
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Peterson?
Speaker 1 (34:01):
Uh? And he he did get tackled three times breakaways.
He was going for the.
Speaker 2 (34:07):
Hoop and sounds like Piston's hornets the other night.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
And kids were just tackling from behind. They didn't another
team they were They thought they were on the grid iron.
They were getting ready for Super Bowl Sunday. They didn't
know what they were doing. They were pretty physical, but
we won the game. So then we immediately get the
car drive over to the other gymnasium.
Speaker 2 (34:25):
That was the purpose of dropping them off thirty minutes
before the game.
Speaker 1 (34:28):
Yes, that way we could get over there before their
game ended. So right when they're done, they can hop
in the car and we can book it to mister
Reading Challenge. So we get in the car and we
er baby Box one lost the game. That's a mute
mute point. It doesn't really matter, and we're driving. Was
(34:52):
your your game of Vandy? Uh, mister C's Reading Challenge
was at Vandy. Get ready.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
They ask you for your COVID card every time when
Justin goes there.
Speaker 1 (35:01):
And so the game starts at two point thirty. We
get in the car at two to oh eight. Now,
my guys, we gotta go. We have got to move.
No Delhi, no Dally. So we're you know, we'erving and
you know, we took ways because we wanted to see
(35:21):
if there was any back way. We didn't want to
hit traffic. I mean, yeah, it's only Nashville. You did
know every back road, but yeah, but you don't know
which way the traffic is gonna be coming for the
big game Vandy versus Oklahoma.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
Ray, we tried to make it through the Sorority row,
quite the shortcut I found. Yeah, ladies, love what you're
doing for the campus.
Speaker 1 (35:41):
So mister C's Reading Challenge had already promised me free tickets,
free tickets for my kids reading three hundred minutes in
the month of January, and ended up there were no
free tickets and we paid one hundred and sixty dollars. Okay, cool.
So we're one hundred and sixty dollars in and we
hadn't even got there yet, and we pull up to
the parking garage and it says forty dollars to park,
(36:09):
forty dollars to park for a Vandy basketball game. M hmm,
my god. And I'm like, well, now we're two hundred
in and we haven't stepped foot in the arena.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
Yeah, that's we're gonna They're gonna get you. It's called fleecing. Oh.
Speaker 1 (36:30):
And I pull up and I roll down the window.
The lady's like, that'll be forty dollars and she go,
I go discount for future students genius. And this was
her reaction, that'll be forty dollars, blows right through it.
All right, cool, handle the credit card, she taps it.
(36:51):
You should have thrown Justin's name out there. And she said,
all right, feel free to park anywhere.
Speaker 2 (36:56):
Oh, he was dishonorably discharged.
Speaker 1 (36:58):
She said feel free to park anywhere. I said, oh,
here's good. I put it in park, literally at the entrance,
literally at the entrance, literally did not move an inch.
And I throw it in bark and I started to unbuckle.
And this is her reaction. You can go in, sir.
(37:21):
You didn't even pull in. I didn't even pull in.
I didn't even pull in. See to me, that is hilarious, dude.
She was really ready to kill you. Oh she was
ready to kill me. I mean, my one joke doesn't land.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
So you hit her with here's good, you better laugh
next time.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
She just tells me you can go in. You stop
in line in park. I did not put it in park.
I literally put it in park in the seatbelt off.
And she was not having any of my jokes. Doesn't
enjoy my humor. I'm like, all right, cool, that's cool,
all right, so we go. We're going up the garage.
(38:03):
Find a parking spot on the fourth level, right next
to the elevator. Get down, get over to the stadium.
There's it's cold as all get out, and we get there.
We walk in and the guys like, you know where
you're going, and me being cocky, old Cockerson, you're still
cocking it. Hell yeah, I go, oh yeah, we just
(38:23):
go here to the right and we go up. So
we go to the right, go up. Our seats are
on the other side the stadium.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
Oh man, oh man, you should have told me you
were a doctor. I thought that's shir what you're gonna
hit me with.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
Ah man, So we gotta go back down. I'm a
doctor here you're wearing a ratted sweatshirt. After walking up
to the third floor of this freaking arena. A lot
of stairs. Gotta go back down, and then we gotta
go around the stadium. Then the kids are hungry, so
I'm all right, let's get some food.
Speaker 2 (38:52):
And that stadium's tight when you're trying to move in
and around.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
Yeah, it's not a very it's very narrow, narrow, always
a lot of people, like.
Speaker 2 (39:01):
A mouse trap for adults. Yes, you get trapped in there.
And then I know Ray in the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (39:07):
We can hear it in quarter the opening tip off happening,
and we're still not to our seats. Is it a trough, No,
they had an individual jurnal. But it is tight. It
is tight. They are there, they are They get them
all the way. Like people coming out of the stalls
are hitting you with the door as you're at the urinal.
What you're working with? Mark? Oh hey, Joe, Oh god,
the dang door hit me in the back. Man, it's
(39:29):
pete all in my hand. It's really annoying. But they
like it. It's like a cool stadium. It is pretty.
There's not a bad seat. Those your trunk hang low,
does it? Wabble floor doesn't wash your hands? Boys? And
so then the boys are hungry. So then I go
up to the registrano. I'm like, all right, I need
an order of two orders of chicken tenders. I need
(39:51):
a hot dog, I need a pretzel. Oh I'm sorry, sir,
we don't have any tenders at this station. You have
to go right over there.
Speaker 2 (39:58):
You gotta get the tend's.
Speaker 1 (40:00):
But it says Tendy's on your menu right there. Yeah, yeah,
but we're not. We don't have them at this You
got to go over there to order the Tendys.
Speaker 2 (40:05):
You're not authorized to sell them.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
Oh my gosh. So I just waited in line for
Tendy's and you guys don't have Tendy's. This is great.
So we turn around and we walk across. I need
two baskets Attendy's. It's amazing. A hot dog six seven bucks,
Tendy's fourteen dollars. What three Tendy's and some potato chips
fourteen freaking dollars, high demand premium meat. And then we
(40:29):
got to get water because the kids haven't drink at anything,
so four bottles of water, so that'd be fifty eight dollars.
So now we are two hundred and fifty eight dollars
into this freaking event that was supposed to be free.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
We always had a rule waters only. Pops was never
getting us stuff.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
Oh no, no, Well we hadn't eat and lunch, and
they just had basketball games were they were hungry.
Speaker 2 (40:52):
Dad would get one lemonade and you can refill it
in the water fountain and the lemonade sugar will still
be in there.
Speaker 1 (40:58):
So it makes about three cups oh, and so I'm
just like, god, dang, this is this is the worst
game of my life. Like, we spent so much freaking
money to go to this Mister Sas Reading challenge, and
then we're at the top of the top. Man, we
are way up there in the arena. We get to
the seats. Finally we get there. We sit down baby
(41:19):
box three. I got a poo poo. Okay, seriously, we
just got here. We just got here. And here's the
cool thing about this arena. When you go up to
the third floor, there are no bathrooms up there, so
you gotta go down to the second floor. And you
know the cool thing about this arena wood No, I
was twelve rows up. You know the cool thing about
(41:41):
this arena is there are no bathrooms on the second floor,
so you gotta go down all the way down to
the first floor to go to the bathroom. So after
climbing all those stairs, you gotta go back down and
then back. I mean, awesome.
Speaker 2 (41:55):
You know what our flaw was when me and Justin
went what we sat seats for perverd We sat in
somebody else's seats. We sat in the band section. Oh yeah,
these are ours? Uh No, they're not. That's where the
band sits. You got us. They were perfect seats, though,
(42:17):
justin of all the seats we picked, where the freaking
band sits.
Speaker 1 (42:20):
Dude, you idiot one of the kids, as you pick
one of the thirty seats, are there? All right? Yeah,
we're lying, all right? Those aren't your seats? Yeah they are,
that's where the team sits. I was wondering why there
was a pad. Pretty comfy, those are good. I was
wondering why there was a white board. I thought I
was writing messages. I wonder why my seat was sponsored.
(42:43):
I get it. Let's go stack owls. So my wife
takes them down to the bathrooms. I was like, I
ain't going. My name's Benn, and I'm not in it.
And so we sit there and we start the game,
and of course we're by none of the kids at
the school because we had to buy our So wherever
the free seats were for mister C's reading challenge, they
(43:05):
weren't near us. Jeez. And let me tell you, they're
just benches, so there's no back, so you're just sitting there,
and as you get older, you want backs on your seat. Guys.
I'm just telling you it's just more comfortable. And let
me tell you, these kids are exhausted. They are laying
on the benches, they're laying on the bleachers, they're laying
(43:25):
in your lap, and Vanderbilt is proceeding to get their
butts kicked. Really, they were getting stomped. Three for Oklahoma,
three for Oklahoma, three for Oklahoma. It was like twenty
four to six right out the gate. That's rare, They're good.
(43:45):
It was so ugly. Then here comes Vandy. They make
a run, get it to twenty four seventeen. Then they
go on a run and I think it happened was
forty one twenty seven or something like that Oklahoma. And
we're like, wow, all right, cool. Then they're doing pictures
on the jumbo tron, like, oh and scan this QR
(44:08):
code and you can send us your picture. You brought
it all the way back around. And what shocking is
oh I thought you.
Speaker 2 (44:16):
Said started the third quarter or no, okay, sorry guys,
that wasn't the end of the pod.
Speaker 1 (44:20):
There's baby boxes teacher on the jumbo troll.
Speaker 2 (44:24):
Here we go.
Speaker 1 (44:25):
He's like, Dad, she's here. Can we go look for.
Speaker 2 (44:32):
No, I'm not looking for your teacher.
Speaker 1 (44:35):
What do you mean Williams. You mean out of these
this whole arena. You want me to walk around and
look for your teacher, and then, yes, what happens when
we find your teacher. We have the world's most awkward
conversation because I know once we find your teacher, you're
just gonna be like clam clam. So halftime boy. So
(44:57):
he's like, Dad, we gotta we gotta do that. We
gotta put our picture up there. All right, I'll bite,
I'll bite, I'll fall for it. I won't take a selfie.
So everybody gathers in boom selfie. All right, cool, and
I send it that way and he's like, it's halftime.
So let's go to the bathroom and on our way down,
guess what second level he walks in and looks at
(45:18):
all the sections. All right, Dad, I don't see her
in here. We get down the first floor. He goes in,
looks at all the sections, Dad, I don't see her.
Walk by the concessions. He's like, Dad, I don't see
my teacher.
Speaker 2 (45:32):
You'll see her Monday.
Speaker 1 (45:33):
I was like, He's like, where do you think she is?
Was like, I don't know, Bud, I don't know. So
we go in and go to the bathroom. He's like,
should we walk around and look for I'm like, no,
we shouldn't. We should go back to our seat because
the second half is going to start.
Speaker 2 (45:46):
Finally you're being a parent.
Speaker 1 (45:48):
But he's like, before we go, Dad walks in the
first level, looks again, doesn't find her. We get to
the second level. He walks in there, looks around. I
don't see her. Dad go up to the third level.
He's looking around. He goes, I don't think she's sitting
up here with us.
Speaker 2 (46:05):
Dad.
Speaker 1 (46:07):
So we sit back down and it's the start of
the second half, and I'll tell you all about it.
Right after this second half, more of the same, Vandy
getting smoked, Vandy getting crushed. And then they had a
promotion that was the most ridiculous promotion I've ever seen.
(46:30):
Give us your kid, no, usually if you put it
the length of the court and you make it in
that little hole, yeah, you get like free scholarship for
a year, a free car.
Speaker 2 (46:42):
Agreed.
Speaker 1 (46:44):
And they pull it out and they're like, if you
get it in that little hole, youet Justin's old job.
You get a five hundred dollars certificate to where and
I'm like, this dude is gonna put the ball the
length of the court and put it a little hole,
and you're gonna give him five hundred dollars.
Speaker 2 (47:04):
Please tell me it's for the restaurant you guys went
to to get Sea her Chin.
Speaker 1 (47:08):
No Ray, that wud have been a hell of a
story if they would have told me for five hundred dollars,
I gotta hit it, though, I would have swung it
like a driver.
Speaker 2 (47:16):
I mean maybe if it's like Larry Flynn's Stripper Club.
Speaker 1 (47:19):
Anyway, I just found that ridiculous. But anyway, more, the
second half just absolutely a butt kicking. And every time
out they're showing pictures on the jumbo tron and they
ain't showing ours, and my kids feelings are starting to
get hurt. And as we I forgot when we were
walking in guess who we saw bones mister C, the
(47:40):
scam artist. Yeah, and he was walking down the hall
and the kids were like, Dad, that's mister C. I'm like, hey,
you owe me a couple dollars.
Speaker 2 (47:50):
Mister C.
Speaker 1 (47:50):
That's when I shoved him against the wall. Said, hey,
you said there was me free tickets, Now give me
your pocket book. But I was like, yeah, that's mister C.
The one that problems was free tickets for mister C
reading challenge. There was nothing free. What was he wearing?
Snake oil and a briefcase? Yeah he was. He looked
very shady. Let me tell you you got my money there.
(48:12):
See he was writing checks. That is at mouth good gash.
I'll tell you that. Man. Was it one of those
crypto kids? Man? So anyway, it is a blowout. The
kids look like they're about to fall asleep on the benches.
Speaker 2 (48:25):
And I was gonna say, you don't need to tell
us the score. Somebody can look up the score. Guys.
The game happened like a week ago.
Speaker 1 (48:30):
We're now by like eighteen with like eight minutes to go,
and I'm like, hey, you guys want to leave? Well
cut to the chase.
Speaker 2 (48:35):
Did they win?
Speaker 1 (48:36):
I was like, you guys ready to go? Like, why
don't we go?
Speaker 2 (48:39):
Because Andy win?
Speaker 1 (48:40):
Because we had a birthday party. We were going that night,
the wife and I at five thirty and I'm like,
this game is a blowout, let's go ahead and go.
You guys look dead. There's you're not even interested in
the game. Work no, dad, Dad, I earned these tickets
I think we should stay t the end.
Speaker 2 (48:54):
Did they win?
Speaker 1 (48:55):
Okay, I'm trying. I was like, you know, I have
a friend named Ray. He has a theory ALI always
leave early so we can beat the traffic. Your kids
knew about it, and they're like, no, dabt, I want
to stay. And I'm like, oh my gosh, this is
so boring. It is so miserable. Five minutes left, they're
down fifteen points and the nicking a. The kids are
(49:16):
falling asleep, and I'm like, guys, let's just go. Let's
just go. No, I don't well, okay, I don't want tears.
I don't want tears.
Speaker 2 (49:25):
Please tell me Vandy made a run.
Speaker 1 (49:27):
I don't want tears. Wife takes one of the kids
to the bathroom. Middle kid to the bathroom. She goes,
She texted me, She goes, should we just leave? Everybody's leaving?
Why don't we just leave? Tell the boys we're leaving.
It's like four minutes, thirty seconds to go, down thirteen
fourteen points. I say, hey, boys, we're gonna leave. Mom's
ready to go. Dad, the game's not over yet. We
don't we can't leave yet, I text, I said, even
(49:50):
though they're about to fall asleep. They look very uninterested.
They're refusing to budge from their seats. Tell him to
sound the buzzer and I'll come back up, and I
mean it clears out, and don't worry. They're still not
showing our picture on the jumboch on that I submitted
to this little QR code, and that is making my
kids upset.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
They need to do it for the parents where they
put zeros on the scoreboard just for a minute so
parents can usher their kids out.
Speaker 1 (50:16):
And with two minutes left, there may be fifty five
people in that arena, and Vandy drains a three. Then
they get a steal and they drain a three, and
now we're down to a minute twenty seconds led, and
we're down by eleven, and we start fouling. I'm like,
what the hell are we doing? We are just delaying
(50:36):
this game. Can we please? It is now four forty eight.
We're supposed to pick up the babysitter at five point fifteen.
We're supposed to be at the birthday party at five
point thirty. We're supposed to make an app. Everybody's supposed
to bring an app for the birthday party. That's the
it's gonna be like a pot luck app dinner. Bring
sea or chin, It'll change your life. Approach this, hey, Sarah,
(51:00):
trying to approach this, and Oklahoma goes down, makes one
of two free throws. Here comes Vandy. They drain a three,
down eight, Oh freak yeah, and I'm like, oh my gosh,
now the boys are up. Now the boys are up.
Oh look our pictures on the jumbbotron. Oh our picture
still not on the JumboTron. Man, still not on the
jumbo tron. But I'm telling you, they start screaming and
(51:26):
when they're shooting free throws, miss it. Oklahoma miss is
two free throws.
Speaker 2 (51:31):
I thought I heard them on Sports Center.
Speaker 1 (51:33):
Bandy hits a three. We're down five with thirty eight
seconds to go, Are you freaking kidding me? Go doors,
and we foul. They make one of two, so we're
down six. Come down, make a three and a foul.
It's gotta be that little kid. He is lights out.
We made a three and we're fouled. We go to
(51:54):
the line, make it four point play. We're down two
with how much left? Twenty seven seconds? Yeah, let's go,
and then it gets crazy like we foul. They make
a free throw. We come down, we miss, and it
goes out of bounds. So they're trying to inbound the
ball and they just throw it straight out of bounds.
(52:14):
They don't. They never get it, like no one. And
then we turn it over on the inbounds and then
we get it to within two. Then it's within three,
and then we come down with a chance to tie
the game down three. We miss, they get it, we
found them. They make both free throws. We make it three.
At the end, we lose by one. Ah, we lose
(52:35):
by one. Freaking kidd me, no but me harassing my kid,
saying we should leave early. And it turns out the
game actually got pretty good. He was screaming his head off,
he was going crazy. He was red in the face,
(52:57):
and I felt bad telling them we should leave early.
They're saying, let's go babie later. Look at them, dude,
he's red in the face. There's no one there. Oh yeah,
(53:21):
good call. Oh man. And we lost by one, all right, man,
hell of a story. I think we all lost by
one there. Yeah, we lost two hundred and fifty six dollars.
Speaker 2 (53:32):
We've approached the end and it was time to go.
Speaker 1 (53:35):
Home, man, Time to go home. Thanks a lot, mister
Cees reading challenge. There was nothing free about the day.
There was absolutely nothing free about it. Well he's heading
off to another campus. Well, we did get free orange
or gold palm palms that the kids shook.
Speaker 2 (53:55):
Those were for the girls.
Speaker 1 (53:57):
And then they wore they acted like there was their hair,
and then they were doing it like it was my hair,
and then it was my wife's hair.
Speaker 2 (54:06):
And then don't do that to your dad.
Speaker 1 (54:07):
They were covering their face with it and saying, dad, Dad,
where'd I go? Did you lose me? And then they went, oh,
I'm still here. So we did that a lot. Yeah,
and then we went to the and then we brought
the pomp poms home with us. The next day we
had to go to the grocery store and they ended
up pushing little kids carts around, so they had brought
(54:28):
the pomp poms in the store with them. Then I
had to carry them. So I did it like I
was directing planes through the airport, and we were doing
that through the grocery store. This way, this way, this way.
Just follow the pump poms. You got to bring those
of the big show.
Speaker 2 (54:41):
That'd be funny. Direct people in the studio.
Speaker 1 (54:43):
Hey, hey this way, Amy, Amy, come here, feeling things.
Come here, feeling yourself, feeling yourself. Take it personally, Take
it personally.
Speaker 2 (54:51):
Construction workers, you help them out with traffic.
Speaker 1 (54:53):
Oh man? Yeah, what a weekend. Man. I didn't even
get to tell you about the birthday party. I'll tell
you about that on Friday, maybe if you can carry.
Speaker 2 (55:02):
I'm as tired as your kids right now.
Speaker 1 (55:04):
Yeah, all right, let's go home. Man.
Speaker 2 (55:07):
I'm gonna leave a minute early.
Speaker 1 (55:09):
Hopefully that was all right. Change your life, didn't it
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Eddie Garcia
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Mike D
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