January 30, 2025 • 35 mins
Amy explains why she and her ex-husband have a code word to help with co-parenting. In the Anonymous Inbox, a husband gets called out by his wife for doing something shady for the Super Bowl. Bobby talks about how some men and women silently suffer from pentheraphobia which is the intense fear of your mother-in-law. We find out who fears their mother in law and the crazy illegal thing Lunchbox's MIL accused him of doing.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Thursday Show Morning studio.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Everybody's here. I have a call here from Bobby and
Illinois who wants to give us an update. So let's
go over to Bobby first. Hey, Bobby, you're giving us
an update on what exactly.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
I called a couple of weeks ago and talk to
you about advice on my dad, who has a heart condition.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
You remember this conversation, Oh, and he was working hself
to death, and you're like, how do I get him
to stop working so hard? I do, remember, Yeah, how'd
that go?
Speaker 3 (00:39):
Yeah? So I took your advice and I talked to
him and used the kids as leverage, And a couple
of days later he got a doctor's appointment and his
doctor told told him that he needed to slow down.
So he has. He has given me more responsibility on
(01:02):
the farm. We have just a little little farm with
seven head of cattle and a couple of horses. So
I've been taking care of a lot of stuff up there.
He didn't go out and try to plow snow or
shovel snow. This winter. He turned down a job opportunity
that he had to go drive a truck, and he
(01:23):
says that this summer he's going to cut back on
his garden because he raises a huge garden.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
So in your mind, that's a win, right right. Okay,
So here's the secondary advice I would give you because
I love it, and for those that did not hear
the first segment, like, his dad has a heart condition
and his dad just work, work, works, And you're not
going to get your dad to completely stop working, but
he is limiting his physical activity. It sounds like. And
(01:52):
all I said was leverage the grand kids. That's about
the only thing that's going to get him to reconsider.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
Now.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
The only other advice I would give you now is
if he stops so much, it's gonna be like when
I go no sugar, and now I go no sugar
for like two or three weeks, and then week four
there's eleven cupcakes going right down the throat because I've
had no sugar. So if I don't do things in moderation,
(02:18):
I'm going to fall off the wagon and just go
back to crushing it. So make sure your dad doesn't
completely reverse course and not work so much that he
just gets burnout on not working and has to go
back into it. Like to find that balance will be
the key to keeping him healthy. Am I explaining myself
in a way that that's not confusing. Yes?
Speaker 3 (02:38):
And I told him, I said, Dad, I don't want
you to just completely stop. I want you to have some,
but not all, of the responsibility. Yeah, and he's still
going to raise his garden. He's still we do the
farm stuff together now, but he is more apt to
(02:58):
let me join him and not just take it all
into his hands and onto his shoulders.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Love it if you can get like a twenty six
percent decrease from him and his physical activity does a
major win, and then it'll slowly back off from there.
Well that's great, Bobby. I appreciate you calling, and I
hope this works out long term for you and your
dad and your kids. And thanks for listening to the.
Speaker 3 (03:20):
Show, No problem, Thank you, Love you guys.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Appreciate that. Hope you have a great day.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
I listened to the podcast while I drive a semi
for fourteen hours.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
A day, so I felt that I drove some one.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
You'd be a pretty good company.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
Had a CD, I thought I was gonna kill everybody
on the road.
Speaker 4 (03:33):
Is by once you literally mean like once?
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Well no more than that a cdo I had to
do it for like three days. Okay, so we shout
the show over three days, but I like a Chattanooga.
I'm driving an eighteen wheeler, a freaking trailer full of
eggs truckers. Truck drivers have the hardest job because people
just consider that to be like part of the road
and they're weaving in and out. When if that truck
hits you or anybody else, probably gonna kill you and
(03:56):
gonna absolutely stop traffic and all those goods. I gotta
get to their place. So justice for trucker is what
I say. Think I'm gonna get that tattoo in my back.
I want to go to Ben in Arkansas calling we
appreciate that Ben, what's going on studio? Morning?
Speaker 5 (04:13):
I was on my way to work and I had
a bald eagle fly over my head and called my wife,
pulled my wife about it. It was cool live in Arkansas,
so used to seeing him, didn't think nothing about it.
Eagles one Sunday, and then on my work way to
work yesterday in almost the exact same spot, Amy was
talking about seeing the Eagles fly out of the sun
(04:35):
and said, the Eagles, We're going to win the Super Bowl.
And I decided to go ahead and go put a
bed on the Eagles to win the Super Bowl.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
Oh okay, good for you man. They're basically it's a
it's a coin toss, right as far as the odds,
I think the Chiefs are a point and a half
favorite last time. I look, that's that's nothing. So I
hope for your I don't I got much money on cheaps.
Speaker 6 (05:00):
You doing this is for fun, like we're not.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
It's whole mortgage. He saw an eagle and he's betting
it all. Yeah, okay, how significant of a bet has
it been?
Speaker 5 (05:09):
I just bet one hundred dollars.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
That's already significant. Okay. Well, I hope you win. I
hope you see that. The crazy thing was, I was
driving to work this morning and saw an Indian chief
on the side of the road. So take that as
you will.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
M okay with a peace pipe, all right, take it
as you will.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
So thank you, Ben, thank you for listening. I hope
you have a great rest of the day. And I
hope the Eagles. I don't hope they win. I'ma be
honest with you. I want to see some nice but
I hope they lose. But I hope for your sake
that you enjoyed the super Bowl. All right, thank you,
all right, bye bye all theaugh amy psychic prediction, even
before she knew they had won their last game, said
the Eagles were gonna win the super Bowl.
Speaker 4 (05:43):
All right, we're here.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
There's a question to be Hello, Bobby Bones, I bought
a TV a couple of weeks ago. I'm hosting a
Super Bowl party. I went with the biggest and clearest picture.
There's a little out of my price range. But to
be honest, I never planned on keeping it. My wife
(06:12):
thought the purchase was ridiculous when I told her, but
then she thought it was even shadier when I said
I'd be returning it after the game within the return window.
Should I return the TV like I planned? Or do
the right thing and take it back earlier than the
game like my wife insists big screen bill, Okay, this
is shady. I don't like it. There is deception involved,
(06:37):
Therefore it is dishonest. He even called it the right
thing because his wife, like my wife, usually knows the
right thing to do. Yeah, so I have like the
thing to do, and she has the right thing to do.
I don't have. Mine's the wrong thing that hers is
usually the right thing. I don't like doing it. Somewhere
there's an integrity scoreboard, and I'd like to have the
good points over on the integrity scoreboard. I would keep
(06:57):
the TV if you can afford it like that. I
know that's not one of the real options here, but
you should. You already paid for it. Keep the TV.
The other two options are take it back after the
super Bowl or the wife says, take it back now
before the game. So in order I would go keep
it and figure out how to pay it off. Take
(07:17):
it back after the game, I know, but if you're
gonna shady, might as well. He's it for the game.
I wouldn't be shady, but if I did, I would
not take it back now. I would take it back
after the game. But again, if you've never used it,
I guess there's there's a point there. If he's not
turned it on yet and he takes it back, it's different.
Speaker 6 (07:32):
That's totally fine. Yeah, I think that if he uses
it for the super.
Speaker 4 (07:35):
Bowl, you're right, you're so unattractive.
Speaker 2 (07:39):
He's already married. Yeah, I think you're probably if the TV,
if you haven't used it at all, I think you
take it back before you use it if like you've
already set it up, you get ready for the big game,
you've you know, watched a couple of shows on it.
You just keep it and watch the game and take
it back. But I think you buy the TV. You
figure out to buy the TV. It's a little lout
(08:00):
your price range. You said that, figure out how to
make up for it. Buy the TV so you're not
doing dirty dog things.
Speaker 4 (08:05):
If you're having a super Bowl party, can you have
a jar?
Speaker 2 (08:08):
So hilarious TV fun You couldn't, And I think your
buddies would think that was actually funny.
Speaker 6 (08:15):
Like my wife said, I was supposed to return this
and I did it.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
I think if you told the whole story and a
text message to all your buddies, I think willingly guys
would drop twenty bucks in that totally.
Speaker 4 (08:25):
What would you do if you got a text message
like that for.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
A friend, he'd laugh. I would think it was hilarious.
I would go, ha, you're shady. I thought better of you.
But if I'm coming to your house, I'm happy to
put some money in the jar. So I would say,
try to buy the TV. Secondly, take it back if
you haven't opened it, then Thirdly, but this is not
a cool thing, but this is something lunchbox would do.
Speaker 7 (08:48):
I feel, Oh, big screen bill, nine am, the dad's
with the super Bowl. You are waiting at those doors
to return that TV. Sorry, guys, a little too big
doesn't fit in my space. Used though, doesn't matter. They
get give you a return window for a reason. They
want you to go home, try it out, see if
it fits in with the paintings on the wall, the decor.
And maybe it's just too a little a little too bright,
(09:10):
it's too shiny.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
I don't know any reason.
Speaker 7 (09:12):
Just take it back day after the super Bowl, enjoy
the game on the big screen, and get one of
your money back.
Speaker 3 (09:18):
You know.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
Problem roll on their eyes that people bringing TVs back
after the super Bowl and nine am like you, there's
like eight dudes all with TVs and they're.
Speaker 4 (09:26):
Like fingerprints all over it.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
Yes, good luck, take it back, No buy it, then
take it back. The segment is for Amy and only
amytie all.
Speaker 5 (09:40):
The dun Hani all the time.
Speaker 6 (09:45):
So I highly recommend having a code word if you're
in any kind of relationship. My ex husband and I
just came up with one for co parenting conversations and
it really has helped. Like I straight up ended a
conversation the other day by just yelling out the word pickle,
and then and he said, okay, by and.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
He hung up.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Okay, I need more information about why the word pickle,
and like, is it if you're fighting something? I don't know.
Speaker 4 (10:07):
It's not.
Speaker 6 (10:07):
I wouldn't call it so much like a fight fight,
but more if there's tension on the line or in
person or however you're having the conversation, it means that
we need a breather. We need to step away because
we're not going to be productive with this conversation until
we take some space, and then when we reconvene, we'll
likely be able to come up with a better result.
(10:30):
Or it was like we're just wasting each other's time
if we keep talking, because we're just not in a
good place.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
So if you yell pickle, he knows, or you know,
if he says pickle to shut it down.
Speaker 6 (10:40):
Yeah, And for us, pickle came up organically. It was
actually like the day before the call, we discussed needing
a code word. We're like, it's almost like we need
a code word, but we never finalized what that was.
I don't even remember what words were thrown out. But
then the next day it was almost like we were
having a few days of just really struggling with communication.
And I think that we are fairly good communicators, so
(11:00):
I'd say ninety eight percent of the time we're pretty
solid our co parenting. But I mean when that two
percent hits, it is just it's rough. And so the
next day we were on a call and I was like,
what's our code Word's our code word?
Speaker 4 (11:12):
And I don't know.
Speaker 6 (11:13):
Just out of nowhere, I just blurted out pickle. And
he knew, like, oh, this must be what we've come
up with, and so he just said okay, bye and
hung up, and I was like, wow, that went well.
And so now we have our word and it's pickle,
and we haven't had to use it since. But in
the future, I know, if we have to bust out
the word.
Speaker 4 (11:32):
Pickle, we know what to do.
Speaker 6 (11:34):
Okay bye. It's not disrespectful. No one's just hanging up.
Speaker 4 (11:37):
You're just like okay, pause, bye, talk to you later.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
I think if it were me having to use that word,
much like when I was thirteen, I would have used
a pickle I give you for any reason to get
out of it.
Speaker 6 (11:47):
No, no, no, no no, Because when you're co parenting, you're
trying to co parent effectively. You have to have conversations.
So you can't just constantly be blurting out the word pickle,
or you'll never get anything done.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Or if I was losing and like I knew, I
was pick.
Speaker 4 (11:59):
All, that's abuse of us.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Here's a pickle, trust me, been there a pickle?
Speaker 6 (12:04):
We know this is supposed to be to help you
in times that are just getting a little you know
you're getting off the path and you need to get
back on the path that sometimes you need to pause,
take a breather, and then continue.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Can you use pickle if you know that you're just
not having a good day and it has nothing to
do with what the situation is, and you know you're
not thinking rationally.
Speaker 6 (12:24):
I mean, I guess you could just if you already
know you're not in a good headspace, you could just don't.
Speaker 4 (12:30):
You don't even need to Can you pre pickle pickle?
Speaker 6 (12:33):
I guess you could pre pickle, but you don't need
to yell out pickle. Pickle is for those dire moments.
I would think if you have that self awareness, then
at the beginning of the call, or when you're trying
to text to arrange a call, like, Hey, I'm just
not in a good headspace today.
Speaker 4 (12:45):
Can we pump this to tomorrow?
Speaker 2 (12:48):
Great, Pickle, this till tomorrow. So what if the show,
what if it's like one of these segments we get
into and I'm like, oh my god, this is not
going well. Can I just yell Pickle? And when Ray
hits the button and gets us out of here?
Speaker 6 (12:59):
Sure, I'm I mean whatever. You can make it a
different word if you want to. I just think that
in any relationship. I found that this worked well for
us the other day, and now we have a word,
and it really.
Speaker 4 (13:10):
Was so great. He handled it so great. Like I
yelled at Pickle, he said, okay, bye, we hung up.
We talked the next day.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Maybe you thought you were going over.
Speaker 4 (13:19):
Okay, no, okay, okay, no, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
I think it's great, all seriousness. I think that's great.
Everybody has and everybody I should do it to build
more effective communication techniques. I love that you guys found
something that works for you. Now it's going to.
Speaker 6 (13:32):
Be really really hard for me though, as if even
if I yell out hickel and he says, Okay, bye.
I might be like, wait, but I have one more
thing to say. But you know the rule of the
word is when the word is said, you.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
Just hang up.
Speaker 6 (13:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:45):
You It's like run from a.
Speaker 6 (13:47):
Grenade, right, okay bye, and just be done with it
because you know you've hit a limit where you may
say something you regret or you're just again, like I said,
wasting each other's time.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
Are you sure?
Speaker 6 (13:57):
You and Caitlin like maybe sometimes need to just.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Meaning I'm pickle.
Speaker 4 (14:01):
Oh okay.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Usually if I say pickle on pointing somewhere, okay.
Speaker 5 (14:06):
They go.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
I would say in high school when some if I
was on pump return and no one catches the ball,
you yell Peter, and everybody runs away because you don't
want the ball hitting the person, them not knowing it,
and the other team getting to recover it. So you
know Peter. I think the reason you know Peter because
Peter's like a wiener, and it was like everybody run away
from the wiener. I'm almost positive that's why it was.
(14:29):
But it was always Peter, like all through me playing
high school ball. Even when we go work with these colleges,
they yell Peter. They get away from the ball. That's
gotta be it, right. So if I yell Peter, that
means we're just gonna shut the bit down right capeche pay.
Speaker 4 (14:43):
Anyone'll no no.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
No, that we'll go off the rails. So Peter will
be our new word. If I'm like, we got to
get out of Peter Ray, then you hit the you
hit the teacher, women, we get us out of here.
We'll just test it right now, and you can hit
Amy all the time. Emmy. I like it that. That
feels like an effective communication technique. I love that you
guys are working on that, your co parenting in a positive,
effective way. And Peter all the time, Amy all the time.
(15:09):
It's time for the good news.
Speaker 6 (15:15):
Interest in women's sports is on the rise, all in
like the gen Z category, but also in men.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Yeah, I mean I Kaitlin Clark am a favorite American athlete.
Speaker 6 (15:25):
So gen Z's interest in women's sports it's growing. It's
up eleven percent since twenty twenty two.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
All from Kaitlin Clark. I'm telling you all from Kaitlin Clark.
Speaker 4 (15:34):
Yeah. Probably, yeah, that's what they're saying.
Speaker 6 (15:37):
My dad always loved women's basketball, so I feel like,
oh man, what a time to be alive, he would say.
Speaker 2 (15:41):
The two people I give credit to, and there are
a lot of people behind the scenes we don't know of,
are Kaitlin Clark and DJ Gasso, assistant softball coach University
of Arkansas.
Speaker 4 (15:51):
Yeah, but okay, my.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
Brother in law.
Speaker 7 (15:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
Who you know softball makes raizorback softball fan.
Speaker 4 (15:59):
Yeah, and your men are increasingly paying attention to the
w NBA.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
So and assistant coach women's are parking softball? Yeah? So,
Kaylyn Clark and DJ Gasso shout outs women's sports.
Speaker 6 (16:10):
Women's sports. I think it's more of the team. This
is about women. DJ's a man, but DJ.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Is a coach for womenmen, the leader of women.
Speaker 4 (16:18):
I know, I get that, but this is about women.
Speaker 2 (16:20):
He's my brother in law. Okay, anyway, what.
Speaker 4 (16:23):
About his mom. Let's give his mom and a shout
out because she's a woman.
Speaker 2 (16:25):
She has well, all moms are women. Yeah, Coach Gaso,
forget it, Coach DJ Gasso.
Speaker 4 (16:30):
No, Well, what's her first name?
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Don't matter. I'm a DJ Gaso gat myself. Yeah, I
mean Patty. She's won like a million national championships. But
you know what, I'm more of a dj Gasso. Guy. Okay,
thank you, that's a great story. No, seriously, I am invested.
I have the WNBA League Pass. What does that mean
I have access to every game on Amazon?
Speaker 4 (16:49):
Oh, you can watch it all?
Speaker 2 (16:50):
Yeah, no, I just watched the fever for the most part.
Sometimes the Las Vegas Aces if I wanted to lose,
but that's about it. Okay, occasionally the sparks. But see
even that, I know. Oh that is wild.
Speaker 7 (17:00):
That's cool.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
All right, that's it. That's what it's all about. That
was telling me something good. There's a disease called pintherophobia.
They say men and women both suffer from it. They
don't share a lot of times they do suffer from it.
They're encouraging people not to be scared to say they
have pintherophobia. But pintherophobia is the intense fear of your
mother in law. Oh wow, yep, let's go around now,
(17:24):
Lunchbox's your mother in law. You've had many stories about her.
They stayed at your house for how long? Oh, two weeks, man,
two weeks? And how many days were you actually comfortable
with them staying? Probably about four four days and they
stayed fourteen They stayed fourteen days. Man fourteen. Do you
feel like you have pintherophobia? I wouldn't say.
Speaker 7 (17:46):
I'm fearful of my mother in law. It can get
uncomfortable at times. It's awkward. She hits on me, she
makes weird comments. She accuses me of smoking weed. I mean,
it's just weird.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
That's a lot of different things, and they had nothing
to do with each other. I don't think she really
hits on you. I think you doesn't interpret any female
talking to you is hitting on you. Maybe maybe she
was smoking. Yeah.
Speaker 7 (18:13):
We were at their house for Thanksgiving one year and
I left to go do something. And then I came
back and we're sitting in the living room and she goes, sure,
smells like weed, and there's only one person that left.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Dang. And I was just like, what did she think
she was kidding? I thought she was kidding.
Speaker 7 (18:34):
No, and that's what I said, And I thought she
was kidding. And my wife goes, oh, that's funny. She goes, well,
he is the only one that left. After she looked
right at me and I was like, Okay, she wasn't joking.
Speaker 2 (18:45):
It was very awkward, like she knows you. But if
you just looked at you and didn't know you. You'd think that, Yeah,
I get it a lot. Yeah, but you don't. No, Amy,
you're I don't know ex mother in law.
Speaker 6 (18:58):
Yeah, I mean I still text with her all the
time and my ex father in law.
Speaker 4 (19:03):
But I know that this is focusing on the mom.
Speaker 6 (19:05):
And we had a great relationship the whole time, and
she's still the grandmother of my children.
Speaker 4 (19:09):
She'll always be in my life. Yeah, we have a Yeah.
I saw her over Christmas break.
Speaker 6 (19:15):
We were all in Colorado at the same time, and
I my sister and I went and met them at
my sister's coffee shop and had coffee with them, and
it was great to catch up.
Speaker 4 (19:22):
And she's still she texted me.
Speaker 6 (19:24):
Most every morning and every night, just like a little
Mooji's like heart and works.
Speaker 4 (19:27):
No, that's too much love and prayer, just real quick
love and prays.
Speaker 6 (19:31):
Yeah, that's when she's praying for us, and I love that,
Like it's just sweet and I just double tap it
or I give a heart back and or sometimes we'll
text about more in depth stuff, but most time it's
just thinking of you, guys, praying for you. Let me
know if the kids need prayer about anything specific. She's
very thoughtful that way.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
How does your ex feel about you and his mom
still be in BFF?
Speaker 6 (19:56):
Well, I've known her since I was a child, and
she was very close to my mom, so away after
my mom died, like I still I see them as
and my dad is passed on too, but my mom
was first, and so she really took on that role
for me, like if I needed advice, like I go
to them. Like when they came they came to town
for Thanksgiving and we're staying with him and they left
(20:17):
his house, They're like, we're gonna go over to Amy's.
And they came over to my house for pick a
couple of hours and like we hung out and they
knew they he knew they came over.
Speaker 4 (20:28):
I think that he's okay with it.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
I think the fact though, that she has the grandma
to your kids, that that is that's an element that
I didn't consider. So yeah, all good. I love it.
My mother in law is a boss, and we don't
have kids yet, and I expect when we do, she
can be over here helping. It's not even about that,
Like she's hilarious. She like runs a business now, like
(20:52):
she's cutting funny, which is my favorite kind of funny,
which where my wife gets it, like I do not
have pent theophobia. We went on vacation this summer and
it was my idea, not that what my wife wasn't
for it, but I was like, let's go on this
vacation and take your parents with us. And part of
that is probably I never had parents, but holy crap,
like I have the opposite. I have panthera liking. Is
(21:16):
that a word? Pinthera positive? I'm pinther a positive. That's
what I identify as. So anybody have a bad relationship
with their mother in law? RAYMONDO? You good? Yeah, she's awesome.
She buys me any president I ever want. Whenever it's
a birthday, Christmas. Yeah, there's ten boxes and it's just me.
I'm not even a kid anymore, and she treats me
like I'm twenty. Okay, you know, I get presents to
(21:37):
a Christmas a lot of them. It's awesome. Yeah, uh
Scuba Steve mother in.
Speaker 8 (21:41):
Law all of mine. I used to live with them
for years in San Francisco. So she was amazing, just
like Ray great experience. She used to watch my laundry,
she used to take care of me, feed me. And
even my other mother in law before when I was
married my first time, she was amazing too. She used
to buy my cruises take care of me. So I've
always attracted great mother in laws.
Speaker 2 (21:56):
So if our mother in law's like a mommy, we
like them, and if they're not, we're like, ah, that's tough.
So Lunchbox, I think you're in the minority here. Yeah,
I think I got the phobia. Hey, could you if
your mother in law was like, hey, Lunchbox, let's just
go spend three days getting to know each other better,
just you and I, would you do that? No? That
(22:20):
was it was so weird. Yeah, so weird. Got it.
You don't have to sleep in the same bedroom or anything,
but let's say two hotel rooms next to each other,
but all day for like three days, you guys just
going like walk and give me to go to a game.
Speaker 7 (22:34):
Oh man, I know what's unto about for three days. There's
no way I can do like two to three minutes
at a time. We have a little conversation. I couldn't
do three days.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
Amy. What's up with that basketball coach you saw?
Speaker 6 (22:47):
Oh my gosh, he was yelling at his players in
the most aggressive way.
Speaker 4 (22:52):
Like all the parents around me anytime he would yell
at them like they would do something.
Speaker 6 (22:55):
Wrong, and he would be like, you have one job
to like make a pass. But the way he was
I can't even manke how he was sixth grade.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
I mean, okay, because at high school coach, I'm like,
I get it.
Speaker 4 (23:07):
No, no, no, no. This was like anger. I can't even
mimic it.
Speaker 6 (23:10):
I don't even know how to get across how angry
and aggressive he was. And it would be like, okay, okay,
one bad pass, like you're a wonder Like I was like, oh,
But all the parents around me, we would kind of
look at each other like what is what is happening?
But the parents of the team that the coach, the yeller,
the aggressive guy, they were unfazed. So obviously they are
(23:33):
used to it, but we were concerned. Even the security
guard that was standing next to us, that's there just
at the school for the game, like he was like, oh,
my blood is boiling. I do not like the way
he's talking to these kids, like this needs to stop.
Like he was ready to go in there if he
needed to to kind of shut this guy down because
he was so mean, mean, and.
Speaker 2 (23:53):
All coaches coached differently. Sixth grade that does feel a
bit young for someone super aggressive. However, a coach knows
his players like a parent knows their kids. Right. It
wasn't the team you were rooting for, though, so that
is kind of why the shock is that what you're saying, Yeah,
but you had never seen him before? No, I just
did you want to say something? Would you in any
(24:14):
world have gone up to him?
Speaker 4 (24:15):
I know probably not, but I mean I definitely was.
Speaker 6 (24:19):
Every time it would happen, we would just my jaw
would sort of drop and I would.
Speaker 4 (24:22):
Look at them be like, oh my gosh, this is
so awkward.
Speaker 6 (24:25):
Like it was so it was that kind of aggressive
to where it's awkward. I mean, I didn't feel the
need to step in and protect these kids. I don't
think that they were in danger. But the security guard
definitely didn't like it, like he was triggered, like he's like,
I did not like this at all whatsoever. And I
was more like mortified for the man because I'm like,
this is embarrassing.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Did his team win? Yes, Okay, I'm good then.
Speaker 4 (24:49):
Okay, as long as they win, it doesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
Well, it doesn't sound like he's hitting.
Speaker 4 (24:53):
No, no, no, no.
Speaker 2 (24:54):
I think kids need to be coached in different ways.
I needed to be coached a specific way. Second grade,
I'm like, no chance, but that sixth and seventh grade
it's travel ball to almost time for the real world.
I didn't see it, so I can't look at it
and just absolutely good. But you know, some coaches are
great too at how effective they are at communicating. And
(25:16):
if his most effective way is very aggressive? Was he
always aggressive with everyone?
Speaker 4 (25:20):
No, I mean when they would come.
Speaker 6 (25:22):
I was watching that because I was like, when they
wouldhuddle up or there would be time out, like he would,
you know, high five bump, he'd be like, oh, do
good job, good job, dam good da da da. But
it was more during the heat of the moment plays
that I could understand having passion and wanting to get
a kid's attention and yell at them to.
Speaker 4 (25:39):
Do it right.
Speaker 6 (25:40):
But I don't know, Maybe it's just his demeanor was
very aggressive and angry, and I thought a tad too
much even for high schoolers, Like if the kids were older,
I still think it would have been too much. But whatever,
I guess it's working. And if y'all are not phased
by it. I'm sure y'all were yelled at at kids sports.
I'm just not used to seeing anything like that.
Speaker 2 (26:02):
Big guy, little guy, big guy. Okay, it probably looked
even more aggressive because he was bigger. I have no
problems with aggressive coaches if the aggression is out of love,
but they're also meeting that aggression with kindness, love and
support in other ways. Because if you're a hammer and
the whole world's a nail, that's all you're doing is
hammer and nails, and that only lasts for a bit
(26:23):
of time before it's not effective anymore. So, hey, any one,
let's go all right, I think i'll pro coach here.
He hit anybody? He won?
Speaker 4 (26:33):
Yeah, I just didn't know how far is too far.
Speaker 6 (26:35):
I wanted to take video, but then I thought that
seems wrong.
Speaker 4 (26:40):
I didn't know if i'd have to get his permission.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
No, you wouldn't have. It was in a public place.
I was at a high school game maybe two years ago,
and the coach on the other team, the basketball coach,
walked up to the score table in the middle of
the game and took a full drink and through it
on the court. No, because he didn't like how the
refs were calling that that was aggressive and so they
had to spend like fifteen minutes cleaning up the court's
running it. In the middle of the game, he took
a full container from the press box from running the
(27:06):
press box just chunked it on the court. It was hilarious.
Speaker 6 (27:10):
The other night or however whenever that was like I
don't know, last weekend or the weekend before when Tennessee
was playing Auburn.
Speaker 4 (27:16):
The Tennessee coaches.
Speaker 6 (27:18):
Yeah, the Tennessee coach got mad at one point and
threw his water bottle down in the hand to clean.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
Up the court.
Speaker 2 (27:23):
And did you say, that's way aggressive?
Speaker 4 (27:24):
And he was like, way too aggressive. I just thought
he was.
Speaker 6 (27:29):
It was very reactionary, like he had his water and
then all of a sudden, he's like he just threw
it down. I understand that, Like I've thrown things in
my own house.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
You've jumped into pools fully clothed.
Speaker 6 (27:40):
Yeah, but I wasn't yelling at anybody like you exit.
But I know at home I have lost it before.
And it was almost like this like I was watching
him lose it, but it's almost like this is his method.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
He's losing it. I think that's how he does it.
And again, had you told me they lost, maybe I
felt different about this. Okay, but I'm for a winner,
all right. Got this voicemail from Melanie.
Speaker 9 (28:02):
I need some help. I have a big issue with
not going for something because I'm afraid of failure, be
that a certification test or a promotion opportunities. Even though
I can like talk myself into knowing it's a good idea,
I can't seem to do it. I need therapy, obviously,
(28:25):
But you guys are always my first job. So if
anyone has advice, i'd appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
Okay, Melanie, I'm gonna give you two very easy things
to think about that hopefully we'll make this process easier
for you. Number One, nobody likes to fail, so I
don't feel like you're alone. And the only regret that
you're going to have later in life is not that
you failed at something. It's if you never tried. Because
we fail at things all the time, we're also obsessed
(28:53):
with ourselves, meaning we think if we suck at something,
we fail at something, other people look at us and
think less of us. I'm wildly insecure. It's why I
do this job. You really don't get into an art
and be a creator unless you're wildly insecure, and that
is me. But I also realize nobody cares like we're
(29:13):
also obsessed with ourselves that if somebody else fails, I
don't think about it for more than once pit second
and I move all my life because I'm so obsessed
with myself. But that's how everybody is. So let's just
say the reason you don't want to fail is because
you don't want to be embarrassed. Other people aren't spending
any other time thinking about you, and that is the
most freeing. Although it doesn't feel like that. It feels
(29:34):
like it's an insult. Nobody cares about you. Well, the
people very close to you in your life do you
care about you? And they didn't love you regardless whether
you fail or not. But the people that you're like,
oh man, I'll be looked at as a failure. Yeah,
maybe for zero point two seconds, because everybody is so
obsessed with themselves. So the first part of this is
you're gonna regret not doing it more than if you
(29:57):
do it, and you do it poorly, that's number one.
Number two, if you do it poorly and people judge
you for it. They're only going to judge you for
a split second because they're too worried about themselves. Nobody cares.
So my advice to you is, think of yourself three
years from now. What if you're in the same exact
(30:18):
spot three years from now having this internal monologue of
I don't know if I can do it. I don't
think it's a good idea. You're going to look back
three years ago and go, man, I wish I would
have just tried it then, because here's what happens. Let
me play the situation out. You go and you attempt
one of these certifications or promotion opportunity and it goes bad.
(30:43):
So first you tried, but secondly, you're going to be
able to learn so much from it not happening. Now.
Do you want to get it? Absolutely, But what you're
going to be able to take from it is, Okay,
it didn't happen. Why didn't happen? What was I not
doing that I could have done better? How did I
communicate that maybe wasn't the best form of communication? That
(31:04):
I can communicate better with my boss? Who can I
learn from to actually get better? How do I create
leverage for a promotion. How So, any time you fail
at something, as long as you don't quit, you learn
from that something. So my advice to you is, and
I say this in the most loving way, suck it up.
(31:26):
Because it sounds like you want to do it. It sounds
like you think you're good enough to do it. It sounds
like you think you can do it. But what's holding
you back is this fear of either other people judging you,
which I will say again, nobody cares enough about you.
Your family does, your A list always does, your inner
circle always does. That's one, and then number two, you're
(31:48):
going to regret it so bad in a year or
two year, three year, six year, ten year, twenty years
that you didn't try. You will never regret something that
you failed at if you kept going, because eventually you're
going to get it. You will always regret not trying.
So that's my advice to you. I believe in you.
You want to do it, and ain't even about therapy.
It's about just committing and going. The hardest thing to
(32:08):
do is just go. It's like, I hate working out.
Do you know how I can start working out? Crap?
Let's just go, Let's just get it. Over with. Let's go.
Hardest thing is starting, so go get it. Don't whine
about it. If you do whine about it, whine about
it alone like in your room. You got it, no
problem eventually. All right. That's my advice to you, Melanie,
(32:30):
Go get them. I'm rooting for you. Hey, you need
to know one of these tough love talks. I'm right here.
I've done everything wrong in my career. Everything. Hey. I
wrote a whole book on failure called fail Until You
Don't where I talk to a bunch of people how
I feel about it. You heard that. But I talked
to a bunch of people that are wildly successful that
weren't wildly successful, and they had so much failure in
(32:51):
their life. I had Stapleton in my book. I had
the former governor of Arkansas. I had Charlotmagne and the god.
I had Walker Hate. I had all these people that
you look at it, go man, they are so successful,
but when you hear about all the crap that they
had to get through just to get to the point
where we see their success. My greatest talent is tenacity,
(33:11):
and I believe you have that too. So thank you
for the voicemail. Leave a voicemail anytime anybody eight seven,
seven seventy seven, Bobby, Melanie, I'm rooted for you, and
suck it up and put in the work, make the
effort and go get it. And if you don't get it,
repeat the step. Suck it up, put in the work,
go get it the second time. All right, that's it.
Speaker 7 (33:33):
It's time for the good news, Bobby.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
The house got burned down in the California wildfires. So
after it was clear, they went back to the remains
to see if anything had survived the flames. So they
go back and they're looking, and he goes to look
in this special place. It's Brian and Stephanie and they
live together, not married, but they go through just looking
for some stuff, and he knows where kind of this
(34:00):
safe area is. He goes in. He finds the ring
that he was going to use to propose to her,
still perfect shape. So that's what he did, right there
at the site that the house had burned down. There's
a picture. He gets on his knee and proposes to her.
He's like, I can't wait. All this happened brought us
even closer together, and it sucks. But what doesn't suck
(34:22):
is being with you. He didn't say that, but he
should have said that exactly. That was what he did.
I just nailed that. But that's a great story, and
there's a great picture of him proposing. It sucks because
all the houses are just gone around him. It's terrible,
but we are focusing on the good because they are
now together. She said, yes, obviously she has a mask on,
(34:42):
and you know the picture where they do the hand,
it's like, look at my finger. She's wearing like a
full mask.
Speaker 4 (34:49):
That's good.
Speaker 6 (34:49):
I mean, this is one of those situations where it'll
either like ring it closer together or tear you apart.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
Ye think about him together. That's a great story. The
second part is good luck to those crazy kids. We
love love that stories from the mirror. That's what it's
all about. That was telling me something good. And that
is the end of the first half of the podcast.
That is the end of the first half of the podcast,
(35:16):
the first tip of the podcast. That is the end
of the first time of the podcast. You can go
to the podcast too, or you can wait till podcast
to come out.
Welcome to Thursday Show Morning studio.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Everybody's here. I have a call here from Bobby and
Illinois who wants to give us an update. So let's
go over to Bobby first. Hey, Bobby, you're giving us
an update on what exactly.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
I called a couple of weeks ago and talk to
you about advice on my dad, who has a heart condition.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
You remember this conversation, Oh, and he was working hself
to death, and you're like, how do I get him
to stop working so hard? I do, remember, Yeah, how'd
that go?
Speaker 3 (00:39):
Yeah? So I took your advice and I talked to
him and used the kids as leverage, And a couple
of days later he got a doctor's appointment and his
doctor told told him that he needed to slow down.
So he has. He has given me more responsibility on
(01:02):
the farm. We have just a little little farm with
seven head of cattle and a couple of horses. So
I've been taking care of a lot of stuff up there.
He didn't go out and try to plow snow or
shovel snow. This winter. He turned down a job opportunity
that he had to go drive a truck, and he
(01:23):
says that this summer he's going to cut back on
his garden because he raises a huge garden.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
So in your mind, that's a win, right right. Okay,
So here's the secondary advice I would give you because
I love it, and for those that did not hear
the first segment, like, his dad has a heart condition
and his dad just work, work, works, And you're not
going to get your dad to completely stop working, but
he is limiting his physical activity. It sounds like. And
(01:52):
all I said was leverage the grand kids. That's about
the only thing that's going to get him to reconsider.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
Now.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
The only other advice I would give you now is
if he stops so much, it's gonna be like when
I go no sugar, and now I go no sugar
for like two or three weeks, and then week four
there's eleven cupcakes going right down the throat because I've
had no sugar. So if I don't do things in moderation,
(02:18):
I'm going to fall off the wagon and just go
back to crushing it. So make sure your dad doesn't
completely reverse course and not work so much that he
just gets burnout on not working and has to go
back into it. Like to find that balance will be
the key to keeping him healthy. Am I explaining myself
in a way that that's not confusing. Yes?
Speaker 3 (02:38):
And I told him, I said, Dad, I don't want
you to just completely stop. I want you to have some,
but not all, of the responsibility. Yeah, and he's still
going to raise his garden. He's still we do the
farm stuff together now, but he is more apt to
(02:58):
let me join him and not just take it all
into his hands and onto his shoulders.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Love it if you can get like a twenty six
percent decrease from him and his physical activity does a
major win, and then it'll slowly back off from there.
Well that's great, Bobby. I appreciate you calling, and I
hope this works out long term for you and your
dad and your kids. And thanks for listening to the.
Speaker 3 (03:20):
Show, No problem, Thank you, Love you guys.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Appreciate that. Hope you have a great day.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
I listened to the podcast while I drive a semi
for fourteen hours.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
A day, so I felt that I drove some one.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
You'd be a pretty good company.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
Had a CD, I thought I was gonna kill everybody
on the road.
Speaker 4 (03:33):
Is by once you literally mean like once?
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Well no more than that a cdo I had to
do it for like three days. Okay, so we shout
the show over three days, but I like a Chattanooga.
I'm driving an eighteen wheeler, a freaking trailer full of
eggs truckers. Truck drivers have the hardest job because people
just consider that to be like part of the road
and they're weaving in and out. When if that truck
hits you or anybody else, probably gonna kill you and
(03:56):
gonna absolutely stop traffic and all those goods. I gotta
get to their place. So justice for trucker is what
I say. Think I'm gonna get that tattoo in my back.
I want to go to Ben in Arkansas calling we
appreciate that Ben, what's going on studio? Morning?
Speaker 5 (04:13):
I was on my way to work and I had
a bald eagle fly over my head and called my wife,
pulled my wife about it. It was cool live in Arkansas,
so used to seeing him, didn't think nothing about it.
Eagles one Sunday, and then on my work way to
work yesterday in almost the exact same spot, Amy was
talking about seeing the Eagles fly out of the sun
(04:35):
and said, the Eagles, We're going to win the Super Bowl.
And I decided to go ahead and go put a
bed on the Eagles to win the Super Bowl.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
Oh okay, good for you man. They're basically it's a
it's a coin toss, right as far as the odds,
I think the Chiefs are a point and a half
favorite last time. I look, that's that's nothing. So I
hope for your I don't I got much money on cheaps.
Speaker 6 (05:00):
You doing this is for fun, like we're not.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
It's whole mortgage. He saw an eagle and he's betting
it all. Yeah, okay, how significant of a bet has
it been?
Speaker 5 (05:09):
I just bet one hundred dollars.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
That's already significant. Okay. Well, I hope you win. I
hope you see that. The crazy thing was, I was
driving to work this morning and saw an Indian chief
on the side of the road. So take that as
you will.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
M okay with a peace pipe, all right, take it
as you will.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
So thank you, Ben, thank you for listening. I hope
you have a great rest of the day. And I
hope the Eagles. I don't hope they win. I'ma be
honest with you. I want to see some nice but
I hope they lose. But I hope for your sake
that you enjoyed the super Bowl. All right, thank you,
all right, bye bye all theaugh amy psychic prediction, even
before she knew they had won their last game, said
the Eagles were gonna win the super Bowl.
Speaker 4 (05:43):
All right, we're here.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
There's a question to be Hello, Bobby Bones, I bought
a TV a couple of weeks ago. I'm hosting a
Super Bowl party. I went with the biggest and clearest picture.
There's a little out of my price range. But to
be honest, I never planned on keeping it. My wife
(06:12):
thought the purchase was ridiculous when I told her, but
then she thought it was even shadier when I said
I'd be returning it after the game within the return window.
Should I return the TV like I planned? Or do
the right thing and take it back earlier than the
game like my wife insists big screen bill, Okay, this
is shady. I don't like it. There is deception involved,
(06:37):
Therefore it is dishonest. He even called it the right
thing because his wife, like my wife, usually knows the
right thing to do. Yeah, so I have like the
thing to do, and she has the right thing to do.
I don't have. Mine's the wrong thing that hers is
usually the right thing. I don't like doing it. Somewhere
there's an integrity scoreboard, and I'd like to have the
good points over on the integrity scoreboard. I would keep
(06:57):
the TV if you can afford it like that. I
know that's not one of the real options here, but
you should. You already paid for it. Keep the TV.
The other two options are take it back after the
super Bowl or the wife says, take it back now
before the game. So in order I would go keep
it and figure out how to pay it off. Take
(07:17):
it back after the game, I know, but if you're
gonna shady, might as well. He's it for the game.
I wouldn't be shady, but if I did, I would
not take it back now. I would take it back
after the game. But again, if you've never used it,
I guess there's there's a point there. If he's not
turned it on yet and he takes it back, it's different.
Speaker 6 (07:32):
That's totally fine. Yeah, I think that if he uses
it for the super.
Speaker 4 (07:35):
Bowl, you're right, you're so unattractive.
Speaker 2 (07:39):
He's already married. Yeah, I think you're probably if the TV,
if you haven't used it at all, I think you
take it back before you use it if like you've
already set it up, you get ready for the big game,
you've you know, watched a couple of shows on it.
You just keep it and watch the game and take
it back. But I think you buy the TV. You
figure out to buy the TV. It's a little lout
(08:00):
your price range. You said that, figure out how to
make up for it. Buy the TV so you're not
doing dirty dog things.
Speaker 4 (08:05):
If you're having a super Bowl party, can you have
a jar?
Speaker 2 (08:08):
So hilarious TV fun You couldn't, And I think your
buddies would think that was actually funny.
Speaker 6 (08:15):
Like my wife said, I was supposed to return this
and I did it.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
I think if you told the whole story and a
text message to all your buddies, I think willingly guys
would drop twenty bucks in that totally.
Speaker 4 (08:25):
What would you do if you got a text message
like that for.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
A friend, he'd laugh. I would think it was hilarious.
I would go, ha, you're shady. I thought better of you.
But if I'm coming to your house, I'm happy to
put some money in the jar. So I would say,
try to buy the TV. Secondly, take it back if
you haven't opened it, then Thirdly, but this is not
a cool thing, but this is something lunchbox would do.
Speaker 7 (08:48):
I feel, Oh, big screen bill, nine am, the dad's
with the super Bowl. You are waiting at those doors
to return that TV. Sorry, guys, a little too big
doesn't fit in my space. Used though, doesn't matter. They
get give you a return window for a reason. They
want you to go home, try it out, see if
it fits in with the paintings on the wall, the decor.
And maybe it's just too a little a little too bright,
(09:10):
it's too shiny.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
I don't know any reason.
Speaker 7 (09:12):
Just take it back day after the super Bowl, enjoy
the game on the big screen, and get one of
your money back.
Speaker 3 (09:18):
You know.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
Problem roll on their eyes that people bringing TVs back
after the super Bowl and nine am like you, there's
like eight dudes all with TVs and they're.
Speaker 4 (09:26):
Like fingerprints all over it.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
Yes, good luck, take it back, No buy it, then
take it back. The segment is for Amy and only
amytie all.
Speaker 5 (09:40):
The dun Hani all the time.
Speaker 6 (09:45):
So I highly recommend having a code word if you're
in any kind of relationship. My ex husband and I
just came up with one for co parenting conversations and
it really has helped. Like I straight up ended a
conversation the other day by just yelling out the word pickle,
and then and he said, okay, by and.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
He hung up.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Okay, I need more information about why the word pickle,
and like, is it if you're fighting something? I don't know.
Speaker 4 (10:07):
It's not.
Speaker 6 (10:07):
I wouldn't call it so much like a fight fight,
but more if there's tension on the line or in
person or however you're having the conversation, it means that
we need a breather. We need to step away because
we're not going to be productive with this conversation until
we take some space, and then when we reconvene, we'll
likely be able to come up with a better result.
(10:30):
Or it was like we're just wasting each other's time
if we keep talking, because we're just not in a
good place.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
So if you yell pickle, he knows, or you know,
if he says pickle to shut it down.
Speaker 6 (10:40):
Yeah, And for us, pickle came up organically. It was
actually like the day before the call, we discussed needing
a code word. We're like, it's almost like we need
a code word, but we never finalized what that was.
I don't even remember what words were thrown out. But
then the next day it was almost like we were
having a few days of just really struggling with communication.
And I think that we are fairly good communicators, so
(11:00):
I'd say ninety eight percent of the time we're pretty
solid our co parenting. But I mean when that two
percent hits, it is just it's rough. And so the
next day we were on a call and I was like,
what's our code Word's our code word?
Speaker 4 (11:12):
And I don't know.
Speaker 6 (11:13):
Just out of nowhere, I just blurted out pickle. And
he knew, like, oh, this must be what we've come
up with, and so he just said okay, bye and
hung up, and I was like, wow, that went well.
And so now we have our word and it's pickle,
and we haven't had to use it since. But in
the future, I know, if we have to bust out
the word.
Speaker 4 (11:32):
Pickle, we know what to do.
Speaker 6 (11:34):
Okay bye. It's not disrespectful. No one's just hanging up.
Speaker 4 (11:37):
You're just like okay, pause, bye, talk to you later.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
I think if it were me having to use that word,
much like when I was thirteen, I would have used
a pickle I give you for any reason to get
out of it.
Speaker 6 (11:47):
No, no, no, no no, Because when you're co parenting, you're
trying to co parent effectively. You have to have conversations.
So you can't just constantly be blurting out the word pickle,
or you'll never get anything done.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Or if I was losing and like I knew, I
was pick.
Speaker 4 (11:59):
All, that's abuse of us.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Here's a pickle, trust me, been there a pickle?
Speaker 6 (12:04):
We know this is supposed to be to help you
in times that are just getting a little you know
you're getting off the path and you need to get
back on the path that sometimes you need to pause,
take a breather, and then continue.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Can you use pickle if you know that you're just
not having a good day and it has nothing to
do with what the situation is, and you know you're
not thinking rationally.
Speaker 6 (12:24):
I mean, I guess you could just if you already
know you're not in a good headspace, you could just don't.
Speaker 4 (12:30):
You don't even need to Can you pre pickle pickle?
Speaker 6 (12:33):
I guess you could pre pickle, but you don't need
to yell out pickle. Pickle is for those dire moments.
I would think if you have that self awareness, then
at the beginning of the call, or when you're trying
to text to arrange a call, like, Hey, I'm just
not in a good headspace today.
Speaker 4 (12:45):
Can we pump this to tomorrow?
Speaker 2 (12:48):
Great, Pickle, this till tomorrow. So what if the show,
what if it's like one of these segments we get
into and I'm like, oh my god, this is not
going well. Can I just yell Pickle? And when Ray
hits the button and gets us out of here?
Speaker 6 (12:59):
Sure, I'm I mean whatever. You can make it a
different word if you want to. I just think that
in any relationship. I found that this worked well for
us the other day, and now we have a word,
and it really.
Speaker 4 (13:10):
Was so great. He handled it so great. Like I
yelled at Pickle, he said, okay, bye, we hung up.
We talked the next day.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Maybe you thought you were going over.
Speaker 4 (13:19):
Okay, no, okay, okay, no, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
I think it's great, all seriousness. I think that's great.
Everybody has and everybody I should do it to build
more effective communication techniques. I love that you guys found
something that works for you. Now it's going to.
Speaker 6 (13:32):
Be really really hard for me though, as if even
if I yell out hickel and he says, Okay, bye.
I might be like, wait, but I have one more
thing to say. But you know the rule of the
word is when the word is said, you.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
Just hang up.
Speaker 6 (13:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:45):
You It's like run from a.
Speaker 6 (13:47):
Grenade, right, okay bye, and just be done with it
because you know you've hit a limit where you may
say something you regret or you're just again, like I said,
wasting each other's time.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
Are you sure?
Speaker 6 (13:57):
You and Caitlin like maybe sometimes need to just.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Meaning I'm pickle.
Speaker 4 (14:01):
Oh okay.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Usually if I say pickle on pointing somewhere, okay.
Speaker 5 (14:06):
They go.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
I would say in high school when some if I
was on pump return and no one catches the ball,
you yell Peter, and everybody runs away because you don't
want the ball hitting the person, them not knowing it,
and the other team getting to recover it. So you
know Peter. I think the reason you know Peter because
Peter's like a wiener, and it was like everybody run away
from the wiener. I'm almost positive that's why it was.
(14:29):
But it was always Peter, like all through me playing
high school ball. Even when we go work with these colleges,
they yell Peter. They get away from the ball. That's
gotta be it, right. So if I yell Peter, that
means we're just gonna shut the bit down right capeche pay.
Speaker 4 (14:43):
Anyone'll no no.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
No, that we'll go off the rails. So Peter will
be our new word. If I'm like, we got to
get out of Peter Ray, then you hit the you
hit the teacher, women, we get us out of here.
We'll just test it right now, and you can hit
Amy all the time. Emmy. I like it that. That
feels like an effective communication technique. I love that you
guys are working on that, your co parenting in a positive,
effective way. And Peter all the time, Amy all the time.
(15:09):
It's time for the good news.
Speaker 6 (15:15):
Interest in women's sports is on the rise, all in
like the gen Z category, but also in men.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Yeah, I mean I Kaitlin Clark am a favorite American athlete.
Speaker 6 (15:25):
So gen Z's interest in women's sports it's growing. It's
up eleven percent since twenty twenty two.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
All from Kaitlin Clark. I'm telling you all from Kaitlin Clark.
Speaker 4 (15:34):
Yeah. Probably, yeah, that's what they're saying.
Speaker 6 (15:37):
My dad always loved women's basketball, so I feel like,
oh man, what a time to be alive, he would say.
Speaker 2 (15:41):
The two people I give credit to, and there are
a lot of people behind the scenes we don't know of,
are Kaitlin Clark and DJ Gasso, assistant softball coach University
of Arkansas.
Speaker 4 (15:51):
Yeah, but okay, my.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
Brother in law.
Speaker 7 (15:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
Who you know softball makes raizorback softball fan.
Speaker 4 (15:59):
Yeah, and your men are increasingly paying attention to the
w NBA.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
So and assistant coach women's are parking softball? Yeah? So,
Kaylyn Clark and DJ Gasso shout outs women's sports.
Speaker 6 (16:10):
Women's sports. I think it's more of the team. This
is about women. DJ's a man, but DJ.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Is a coach for womenmen, the leader of women.
Speaker 4 (16:18):
I know, I get that, but this is about women.
Speaker 2 (16:20):
He's my brother in law. Okay, anyway, what.
Speaker 4 (16:23):
About his mom. Let's give his mom and a shout
out because she's a woman.
Speaker 2 (16:25):
She has well, all moms are women. Yeah, Coach Gaso,
forget it, Coach DJ Gasso.
Speaker 4 (16:30):
No, Well, what's her first name?
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Don't matter. I'm a DJ Gaso gat myself. Yeah, I
mean Patty. She's won like a million national championships. But
you know what, I'm more of a dj Gasso. Guy. Okay,
thank you, that's a great story. No, seriously, I am invested.
I have the WNBA League Pass. What does that mean
I have access to every game on Amazon?
Speaker 4 (16:49):
Oh, you can watch it all?
Speaker 2 (16:50):
Yeah, no, I just watched the fever for the most part.
Sometimes the Las Vegas Aces if I wanted to lose,
but that's about it. Okay, occasionally the sparks. But see
even that, I know. Oh that is wild.
Speaker 7 (17:00):
That's cool.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
All right, that's it. That's what it's all about. That
was telling me something good. There's a disease called pintherophobia.
They say men and women both suffer from it. They
don't share a lot of times they do suffer from it.
They're encouraging people not to be scared to say they
have pintherophobia. But pintherophobia is the intense fear of your
mother in law. Oh wow, yep, let's go around now,
(17:24):
Lunchbox's your mother in law. You've had many stories about her.
They stayed at your house for how long? Oh, two weeks, man,
two weeks? And how many days were you actually comfortable
with them staying? Probably about four four days and they
stayed fourteen They stayed fourteen days. Man fourteen. Do you
feel like you have pintherophobia? I wouldn't say.
Speaker 7 (17:46):
I'm fearful of my mother in law. It can get
uncomfortable at times. It's awkward. She hits on me, she
makes weird comments. She accuses me of smoking weed. I mean,
it's just weird.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
That's a lot of different things, and they had nothing
to do with each other. I don't think she really
hits on you. I think you doesn't interpret any female
talking to you is hitting on you. Maybe maybe she
was smoking. Yeah.
Speaker 7 (18:13):
We were at their house for Thanksgiving one year and
I left to go do something. And then I came
back and we're sitting in the living room and she goes, sure,
smells like weed, and there's only one person that left.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Dang. And I was just like, what did she think
she was kidding? I thought she was kidding.
Speaker 7 (18:34):
No, and that's what I said, And I thought she
was kidding. And my wife goes, oh, that's funny. She goes, well,
he is the only one that left. After she looked
right at me and I was like, Okay, she wasn't joking.
Speaker 2 (18:45):
It was very awkward, like she knows you. But if
you just looked at you and didn't know you. You'd think that, Yeah,
I get it a lot. Yeah, but you don't. No, Amy,
you're I don't know ex mother in law.
Speaker 6 (18:58):
Yeah, I mean I still text with her all the
time and my ex father in law.
Speaker 4 (19:03):
But I know that this is focusing on the mom.
Speaker 6 (19:05):
And we had a great relationship the whole time, and
she's still the grandmother of my children.
Speaker 4 (19:09):
She'll always be in my life. Yeah, we have a Yeah.
I saw her over Christmas break.
Speaker 6 (19:15):
We were all in Colorado at the same time, and
I my sister and I went and met them at
my sister's coffee shop and had coffee with them, and
it was great to catch up.
Speaker 4 (19:22):
And she's still she texted me.
Speaker 6 (19:24):
Most every morning and every night, just like a little
Mooji's like heart and works.
Speaker 4 (19:27):
No, that's too much love and prayer, just real quick
love and prays.
Speaker 6 (19:31):
Yeah, that's when she's praying for us, and I love that,
Like it's just sweet and I just double tap it
or I give a heart back and or sometimes we'll
text about more in depth stuff, but most time it's
just thinking of you, guys, praying for you. Let me
know if the kids need prayer about anything specific. She's
very thoughtful that way.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
How does your ex feel about you and his mom
still be in BFF?
Speaker 6 (19:56):
Well, I've known her since I was a child, and
she was very close to my mom, so away after
my mom died, like I still I see them as
and my dad is passed on too, but my mom
was first, and so she really took on that role
for me, like if I needed advice, like I go
to them. Like when they came they came to town
for Thanksgiving and we're staying with him and they left
(20:17):
his house, They're like, we're gonna go over to Amy's.
And they came over to my house for pick a
couple of hours and like we hung out and they
knew they he knew they came over.
Speaker 4 (20:28):
I think that he's okay with it.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
I think the fact though, that she has the grandma
to your kids, that that is that's an element that
I didn't consider. So yeah, all good. I love it.
My mother in law is a boss, and we don't
have kids yet, and I expect when we do, she
can be over here helping. It's not even about that,
Like she's hilarious. She like runs a business now, like
(20:52):
she's cutting funny, which is my favorite kind of funny,
which where my wife gets it, like I do not
have pent theophobia. We went on vacation this summer and
it was my idea, not that what my wife wasn't
for it, but I was like, let's go on this
vacation and take your parents with us. And part of
that is probably I never had parents, but holy crap,
like I have the opposite. I have panthera liking. Is
(21:16):
that a word? Pinthera positive? I'm pinther a positive. That's
what I identify as. So anybody have a bad relationship
with their mother in law? RAYMONDO? You good? Yeah, she's awesome.
She buys me any president I ever want. Whenever it's
a birthday, Christmas. Yeah, there's ten boxes and it's just me.
I'm not even a kid anymore, and she treats me
like I'm twenty. Okay, you know, I get presents to
(21:37):
a Christmas a lot of them. It's awesome. Yeah, uh
Scuba Steve mother in.
Speaker 8 (21:41):
Law all of mine. I used to live with them
for years in San Francisco. So she was amazing, just
like Ray great experience. She used to watch my laundry,
she used to take care of me, feed me. And
even my other mother in law before when I was
married my first time, she was amazing too. She used
to buy my cruises take care of me. So I've
always attracted great mother in laws.
Speaker 2 (21:56):
So if our mother in law's like a mommy, we
like them, and if they're not, we're like, ah, that's tough.
So Lunchbox, I think you're in the minority here. Yeah,
I think I got the phobia. Hey, could you if
your mother in law was like, hey, Lunchbox, let's just
go spend three days getting to know each other better,
just you and I, would you do that? No? That
(22:20):
was it was so weird. Yeah, so weird. Got it.
You don't have to sleep in the same bedroom or anything,
but let's say two hotel rooms next to each other,
but all day for like three days, you guys just
going like walk and give me to go to a game.
Speaker 7 (22:34):
Oh man, I know what's unto about for three days. There's
no way I can do like two to three minutes
at a time. We have a little conversation. I couldn't
do three days.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
Amy. What's up with that basketball coach you saw?
Speaker 6 (22:47):
Oh my gosh, he was yelling at his players in
the most aggressive way.
Speaker 4 (22:52):
Like all the parents around me anytime he would yell
at them like they would do something.
Speaker 6 (22:55):
Wrong, and he would be like, you have one job
to like make a pass. But the way he was
I can't even manke how he was sixth grade.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
I mean, okay, because at high school coach, I'm like,
I get it.
Speaker 4 (23:07):
No, no, no, no. This was like anger. I can't even
mimic it.
Speaker 6 (23:10):
I don't even know how to get across how angry
and aggressive he was. And it would be like, okay, okay,
one bad pass, like you're a wonder Like I was like, oh,
But all the parents around me, we would kind of
look at each other like what is what is happening?
But the parents of the team that the coach, the yeller,
the aggressive guy, they were unfazed. So obviously they are
(23:33):
used to it, but we were concerned. Even the security
guard that was standing next to us, that's there just
at the school for the game, like he was like, oh,
my blood is boiling. I do not like the way
he's talking to these kids, like this needs to stop.
Like he was ready to go in there if he
needed to to kind of shut this guy down because
he was so mean, mean, and.
Speaker 2 (23:53):
All coaches coached differently. Sixth grade that does feel a
bit young for someone super aggressive. However, a coach knows
his players like a parent knows their kids. Right. It
wasn't the team you were rooting for, though, so that
is kind of why the shock is that what you're saying, Yeah,
but you had never seen him before? No, I just
did you want to say something? Would you in any
(24:14):
world have gone up to him?
Speaker 4 (24:15):
I know probably not, but I mean I definitely was.
Speaker 6 (24:19):
Every time it would happen, we would just my jaw
would sort of drop and I would.
Speaker 4 (24:22):
Look at them be like, oh my gosh, this is
so awkward.
Speaker 6 (24:25):
Like it was so it was that kind of aggressive
to where it's awkward. I mean, I didn't feel the
need to step in and protect these kids. I don't
think that they were in danger. But the security guard
definitely didn't like it, like he was triggered, like he's like,
I did not like this at all whatsoever. And I
was more like mortified for the man because I'm like,
this is embarrassing.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Did his team win? Yes, Okay, I'm good then.
Speaker 4 (24:49):
Okay, as long as they win, it doesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
Well, it doesn't sound like he's hitting.
Speaker 4 (24:53):
No, no, no, no.
Speaker 2 (24:54):
I think kids need to be coached in different ways.
I needed to be coached a specific way. Second grade,
I'm like, no chance, but that sixth and seventh grade
it's travel ball to almost time for the real world.
I didn't see it, so I can't look at it
and just absolutely good. But you know, some coaches are
great too at how effective they are at communicating. And
(25:16):
if his most effective way is very aggressive? Was he
always aggressive with everyone?
Speaker 4 (25:20):
No, I mean when they would come.
Speaker 6 (25:22):
I was watching that because I was like, when they
wouldhuddle up or there would be time out, like he would,
you know, high five bump, he'd be like, oh, do
good job, good job, dam good da da da. But
it was more during the heat of the moment plays
that I could understand having passion and wanting to get
a kid's attention and yell at them to.
Speaker 4 (25:39):
Do it right.
Speaker 6 (25:40):
But I don't know, Maybe it's just his demeanor was
very aggressive and angry, and I thought a tad too
much even for high schoolers, Like if the kids were older,
I still think it would have been too much. But whatever,
I guess it's working. And if y'all are not phased
by it. I'm sure y'all were yelled at at kids sports.
I'm just not used to seeing anything like that.
Speaker 2 (26:02):
Big guy, little guy, big guy. Okay, it probably looked
even more aggressive because he was bigger. I have no
problems with aggressive coaches if the aggression is out of love,
but they're also meeting that aggression with kindness, love and
support in other ways. Because if you're a hammer and
the whole world's a nail, that's all you're doing is
hammer and nails, and that only lasts for a bit
(26:23):
of time before it's not effective anymore. So, hey, any one,
let's go all right, I think i'll pro coach here.
He hit anybody? He won?
Speaker 4 (26:33):
Yeah, I just didn't know how far is too far.
Speaker 6 (26:35):
I wanted to take video, but then I thought that
seems wrong.
Speaker 4 (26:40):
I didn't know if i'd have to get his permission.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
No, you wouldn't have. It was in a public place.
I was at a high school game maybe two years ago,
and the coach on the other team, the basketball coach,
walked up to the score table in the middle of
the game and took a full drink and through it
on the court. No, because he didn't like how the
refs were calling that that was aggressive and so they
had to spend like fifteen minutes cleaning up the court's
running it. In the middle of the game, he took
a full container from the press box from running the
(27:06):
press box just chunked it on the court. It was hilarious.
Speaker 6 (27:10):
The other night or however whenever that was like I
don't know, last weekend or the weekend before when Tennessee
was playing Auburn.
Speaker 4 (27:16):
The Tennessee coaches.
Speaker 6 (27:18):
Yeah, the Tennessee coach got mad at one point and
threw his water bottle down in the hand to clean.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
Up the court.
Speaker 2 (27:23):
And did you say, that's way aggressive?
Speaker 4 (27:24):
And he was like, way too aggressive. I just thought
he was.
Speaker 6 (27:29):
It was very reactionary, like he had his water and
then all of a sudden, he's like he just threw
it down. I understand that, Like I've thrown things in
my own house.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
You've jumped into pools fully clothed.
Speaker 6 (27:40):
Yeah, but I wasn't yelling at anybody like you exit.
But I know at home I have lost it before.
And it was almost like this like I was watching
him lose it, but it's almost like this is his method.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
He's losing it. I think that's how he does it.
And again, had you told me they lost, maybe I
felt different about this. Okay, but I'm for a winner,
all right. Got this voicemail from Melanie.
Speaker 9 (28:02):
I need some help. I have a big issue with
not going for something because I'm afraid of failure, be
that a certification test or a promotion opportunities. Even though
I can like talk myself into knowing it's a good idea,
I can't seem to do it. I need therapy, obviously,
(28:25):
But you guys are always my first job. So if
anyone has advice, i'd appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
Okay, Melanie, I'm gonna give you two very easy things
to think about that hopefully we'll make this process easier
for you. Number One, nobody likes to fail, so I
don't feel like you're alone. And the only regret that
you're going to have later in life is not that
you failed at something. It's if you never tried. Because
we fail at things all the time, we're also obsessed
(28:53):
with ourselves, meaning we think if we suck at something,
we fail at something, other people look at us and
think less of us. I'm wildly insecure. It's why I
do this job. You really don't get into an art
and be a creator unless you're wildly insecure, and that
is me. But I also realize nobody cares like we're
(29:13):
also obsessed with ourselves that if somebody else fails, I
don't think about it for more than once pit second
and I move all my life because I'm so obsessed
with myself. But that's how everybody is. So let's just
say the reason you don't want to fail is because
you don't want to be embarrassed. Other people aren't spending
any other time thinking about you, and that is the
most freeing. Although it doesn't feel like that. It feels
(29:34):
like it's an insult. Nobody cares about you. Well, the
people very close to you in your life do you
care about you? And they didn't love you regardless whether
you fail or not. But the people that you're like,
oh man, I'll be looked at as a failure. Yeah,
maybe for zero point two seconds, because everybody is so
obsessed with themselves. So the first part of this is
you're gonna regret not doing it more than if you
(29:57):
do it, and you do it poorly, that's number one.
Number two, if you do it poorly and people judge
you for it. They're only going to judge you for
a split second because they're too worried about themselves. Nobody cares.
So my advice to you is, think of yourself three
years from now. What if you're in the same exact
(30:18):
spot three years from now having this internal monologue of
I don't know if I can do it. I don't
think it's a good idea. You're going to look back
three years ago and go, man, I wish I would
have just tried it then, because here's what happens. Let
me play the situation out. You go and you attempt
one of these certifications or promotion opportunity and it goes bad.
(30:43):
So first you tried, but secondly, you're going to be
able to learn so much from it not happening. Now.
Do you want to get it? Absolutely, But what you're
going to be able to take from it is, Okay,
it didn't happen. Why didn't happen? What was I not
doing that I could have done better? How did I
communicate that maybe wasn't the best form of communication? That
(31:04):
I can communicate better with my boss? Who can I
learn from to actually get better? How do I create
leverage for a promotion. How So, any time you fail
at something, as long as you don't quit, you learn
from that something. So my advice to you is, and
I say this in the most loving way, suck it up.
(31:26):
Because it sounds like you want to do it. It sounds
like you think you're good enough to do it. It sounds
like you think you can do it. But what's holding
you back is this fear of either other people judging you,
which I will say again, nobody cares enough about you.
Your family does, your A list always does, your inner
circle always does. That's one, and then number two, you're
(31:48):
going to regret it so bad in a year or
two year, three year, six year, ten year, twenty years
that you didn't try. You will never regret something that
you failed at if you kept going, because eventually you're
going to get it. You will always regret not trying.
So that's my advice to you. I believe in you.
You want to do it, and ain't even about therapy.
It's about just committing and going. The hardest thing to
(32:08):
do is just go. It's like, I hate working out.
Do you know how I can start working out? Crap?
Let's just go, Let's just get it. Over with. Let's go.
Hardest thing is starting, so go get it. Don't whine
about it. If you do whine about it, whine about
it alone like in your room. You got it, no
problem eventually. All right. That's my advice to you, Melanie,
(32:30):
Go get them. I'm rooting for you. Hey, you need
to know one of these tough love talks. I'm right here.
I've done everything wrong in my career. Everything. Hey. I
wrote a whole book on failure called fail Until You
Don't where I talk to a bunch of people how
I feel about it. You heard that. But I talked
to a bunch of people that are wildly successful that
weren't wildly successful, and they had so much failure in
(32:51):
their life. I had Stapleton in my book. I had
the former governor of Arkansas. I had Charlotmagne and the god.
I had Walker Hate. I had all these people that
you look at it, go man, they are so successful,
but when you hear about all the crap that they
had to get through just to get to the point
where we see their success. My greatest talent is tenacity,
(33:11):
and I believe you have that too. So thank you
for the voicemail. Leave a voicemail anytime anybody eight seven,
seven seventy seven, Bobby, Melanie, I'm rooted for you, and
suck it up and put in the work, make the
effort and go get it. And if you don't get it,
repeat the step. Suck it up, put in the work,
go get it the second time. All right, that's it.
Speaker 7 (33:33):
It's time for the good news, Bobby.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
The house got burned down in the California wildfires. So
after it was clear, they went back to the remains
to see if anything had survived the flames. So they
go back and they're looking, and he goes to look
in this special place. It's Brian and Stephanie and they
live together, not married, but they go through just looking
for some stuff, and he knows where kind of this
(34:00):
safe area is. He goes in. He finds the ring
that he was going to use to propose to her,
still perfect shape. So that's what he did, right there
at the site that the house had burned down. There's
a picture. He gets on his knee and proposes to her.
He's like, I can't wait. All this happened brought us
even closer together, and it sucks. But what doesn't suck
(34:22):
is being with you. He didn't say that, but he
should have said that exactly. That was what he did.
I just nailed that. But that's a great story, and
there's a great picture of him proposing. It sucks because
all the houses are just gone around him. It's terrible,
but we are focusing on the good because they are
now together. She said, yes, obviously she has a mask on,
(34:42):
and you know the picture where they do the hand,
it's like, look at my finger. She's wearing like a
full mask.
Speaker 4 (34:49):
That's good.
Speaker 6 (34:49):
I mean, this is one of those situations where it'll
either like ring it closer together or tear you apart.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
Ye think about him together. That's a great story. The
second part is good luck to those crazy kids. We
love love that stories from the mirror. That's what it's
all about. That was telling me something good. And that
is the end of the first half of the podcast.
That is the end of the first half of the podcast,
(35:16):
the first tip of the podcast. That is the end
of the first time of the podcast. You can go
to the podcast too, or you can wait till podcast
to come out.
Hosts And Creators
Bobby Bones
Amy Brown
Lunchbox
Eddie Garcia
Morgan Huelsman
Raymundo
Mike D
Abby Anderson
Scuba Steve
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