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December 5, 2024 38 mins

This week Scott is joined by author, businessman and public speaker, Stedman Graham. Scott and Stedman discuss the importance of identity leadership, centering your worth around your own strengths and talents, and self actualization. 

 

Stedman's Book--> https://www.amazon.com/Identity-Leadership-Others-First-Yourself/dp/1546083375

 

Stedman's Website--> stedmangraham.com

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
What about Oprah? You just guy, Oprah is a true
identity leader? Why is Oprah a true identity leader?

Speaker 2 (00:06):
Or she's so smart, so bright, very kind, just given
so much to the world. It's just unbelievable what she's
been able to do. I can't even believe it myself.

Speaker 1 (00:23):
Today. It's great to have educator, author, businessman, and public
speaker Steadman Graham on the podcast. Many people have heard
of Steedman as the longtime partner of Oprah Winfrey, but
he's much more than that, and as we discussed in
the episode today, Steedman's groundbreaking work has really unearthed the
importance of identity leadership, which is based on the philosophy

(00:45):
that if you can't lead yourself, you can't lead anyone else.
According to Steedman, successful people know who they are, are
clear what matters to them, and create value for themselves
and others. Steedman's life dramatically changed when he begins central
all that he does around his own talents, strengths, and passions.
As you'll see in this episode, we both share a

(01:06):
great love of self actualization. I hope I was also
able to shine a light on Steedman as a human
and that you get to know him a little bit
better as well. So, without further ado, I bring you
dead Men Graham. Dead Men Graham, thank you so much
for being on the Psychology Podcast.

Speaker 2 (01:23):
Scott, thank you for having me. I appreciate all the
work that you're doing, and it's great to learn about
all that you're planning to do in the future.

Speaker 1 (01:31):
Oh, thank you. That's really kind of you. You know,
we have a lot of interest, including your life mission, which,
as you've said, I've dedicated my life to this work
of teaching people throughout the world how to self actualize
their potential as human beings. Wow. That's a pretty exciting,
exciting dream. But I want to actually start with the

(01:53):
question of who is Dedmond Graham. I want to get
to know you a little bit better. First.

Speaker 2 (02:00):
Well, I'm an author. Uh, you know, I love education.
I'm a veteran. I have worked in this field for
a long time. I've kind of dedicated my life to identity, UH,

(02:20):
teaching people how to find out who they are, how
to organize your life around themselves, how to you know,
take information and make it relevant to their to their development,
their personal profession of development. UH, teaching them how to
learn how to learn, and you know, I I I

(02:41):
enjoyed that work. I don't know what else to do.
You know, I love athletics, I love to travel, so
all of that works.

Speaker 1 (02:53):
You have a master's degree in education, right.

Speaker 2 (02:56):
Yes, yes, from Ball State University. I really enjoyed my
time at ball State and uh, even though I went
to school over in the European campus over in Germany,
it was it was a great experience for me.

Speaker 1 (03:15):
What what now? What sports did you play? You're a
good athlete, right.

Speaker 2 (03:19):
Uh, if you let me tell it, m h. Yeah,
So I enjoyed, uh, you know, playing basketball and tennis.
And I'm a big golfer now, so I enjoyed a
lot of sports.

Speaker 1 (03:36):
So now, when did you get interested in the idea
of self actualization?

Speaker 2 (03:43):
Well, I think I got really interested in it at
an early age, trying to I didn't know what it
was or what the name of the name of it,
you know, the name of it, what I would call
it back then. That's what I'm trying to say. But
you know, I think everything's about self actualization and self development.

(04:05):
You people are looking to try to figure out who
they are, and they don't really have a name for it.
So you know, early on in life, you know, I
was trying to figure out again, you know, what my
purpose was and all of that, and you know, and
trying to do the best I could possibly could do

(04:26):
based on my circumstances.

Speaker 1 (04:29):
Yeah, because you say, quote, my life dramatically changed for
the better when I began centering all that I do
around my talent, strengths and passions. Well, what was your
life like before that?

Speaker 2 (04:39):
Well, I mean you just told basically Scott to get
a job, go to school, and go to work and
all of that. That's pretty much what you do. And
so I tried to do all of that. I worked
in the prison system, you know, a while, I worked
in public relations and marketing. I served in the US Army,

(05:01):
I played ball in Europe. You know, I tried to
do all the things that I needed to do to
just like everybody else. And and you really kind of
focus on the outside world was a way to define
your existence because you really don't know who you are
and you're looking for it on the outside. And it

(05:22):
took me a long time to realize that. You know,
if you're looking for freedom on the outside, you never
find your freedom is only on the inside.

Speaker 1 (05:31):
There's a great truth. But I don't think a lot
of people really have gotten have gotten that memo. You
played basketball in Europe? Is that right?

Speaker 2 (05:40):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (05:40):
I did a position.

Speaker 2 (05:43):
I was a small forward, so I like to, you know,
shoot in the corner, and that was my main shot.
And I played in school of course in college, and
then when I got to in the Army, I went
over to who they sent me into Europe and I
got a chance to play ball for the service as

(06:06):
well as being picked up by a team over there
and started playing ball with them and traveling around throughout
Europe and all of that. So it was a great
experience for me.

Speaker 1 (06:20):
That's so cool. I love basketball. What is like one
other thing that people about you, something about yourself that
people might be surprised to hear.

Speaker 2 (06:32):
I think probably how dedicated I am to the work
that I do now, which is identity leadership, and I
mean and the self actualization work that you talk about
a lot and that you're involved in. I think being

(06:54):
able to do this work, as you know, it's a
twenty four to seven job. I mean, I spent all
my time really trying to build these programs and we're
in the schools and we have a college program, and
we have a corporate program, and we train people all

(07:14):
over the world. And now we have the ability to
virtually train people, which is fantastic to be able to
use technology as a way to deliver this message. So
I'm excited about all of that.

Speaker 1 (07:28):
I'm excited too. That is very exciting.

Speaker 2 (07:30):
You know.

Speaker 1 (07:31):
You say identity leadership is self leadership, and it's based
on the philosophy that if you can't lead yourself, you
can't lead anyone else. Anything else you want to add
about that, you're sort of your definition of identity leadership.

Speaker 2 (07:43):
Well, I think that's a pretty good definition. Self leadership
is everything. You can't lead anybody else until your first
lead yourself, and most people don't know how to do that.
They're kind of stuck in the box, stilling the same
thing over and over every single day. You know, they
wake up in the morning, they watch the face, you

(08:03):
brush your teeth, They get something to eat, they get
the kids off the school, work all day, come home
in the afternoon, they spend time with the family, they
watch TV, they go to bed, and maybe they dream,
and then they repeat that same cycle over and over,
you know, every day. You know, if you did the
same thing you did yesterday, as you will do today,
as you will do tomorrow. What have you done? The

(08:25):
answer would be probably nothing, because you've done the same thing.
You're not thinking, you're not developing, you're not creating, you're
not designing your own future. And then you go to school,
and school teaches how to memorize and take tests or
repeat information back. You get labeled with a grade two
weeks later. If I asked you what you learn, you'd
probably say I forgot or I don't remember. And so

(08:49):
you know, I often tell my audiences and people that
I train nothing for nothing. There's nothing. So the most
important thing that you have, the most important question to
anyone wherever I ask you, is you know who you are?
And that requires some real internal thinking, requires you having

(09:11):
some self discovery about what your talents are, what your
abilities are, what you love, what you care about, what
your interests are. So as you can begin to, as
you say it self actualize your potential as a human
being and have a foundation for production and excellence and
opportunity to be able to organize the global marketplace. And

(09:36):
now we have access to technology as a way to
define our existence. It's really a gift. I mean, you
couldn't have a better time than today to probably be
alive because you have access to content and resources and
opportunities globally and you're able to take that information, which

(10:00):
is you know, teaching people to learn how to learn,
which is what I try to do. Change the learning
system around where they make everything relevant to their personal
professional development so they can grow, so they can create opportunities,
so they can expand their ability to be an expert

(10:21):
in their field and then serve the world based on
what they create for themselves.

Speaker 1 (10:27):
That's beautiful. Yeah, there are a lot of things in
your book that really resonated with me. One thing was
that you said, don't wait for others to define who
you are or what your potential is. Man, I really
resonated with that. I wasn't special at as a kid
for an auditory disability, and there was a point where
I was like, I'm not going to let that define
me anymore, and it really changed my life. So I
think there's really a deep, profound truth there to that.

Speaker 2 (10:49):
Well, it's great to just say that because I mean,
you know, again, I grew up to special need brothers
in my family, and they had you know, a lot
of opportunity and you know, focusing on their talents and
their skills and their ability. I mean, that is what

(11:09):
it's all about. It's just take what you have, take
your strengths, take what you do well, take what makes
you happy, begin to organize that, be conscious of what
that is, and then then apply information to that. And
so if you have people that can help you do that,
especially in that particular segment, especially as segment boy, I mean,

(11:30):
they can do much more than they're doing now with
the right kind of program. So I think that's that's
a great statement.

Speaker 1 (11:40):
Yeah, I think so too. I mean, as a leader,
how can you see this potential in others before you
know they even see it in themselves. I mean, I
think that's one aspect of being a great leader is
kind of having that strength spotting ability, right.

Speaker 2 (11:56):
Well. People have to be trained, I think, and have
to be away of what's possible, and so oftentimes you
don't know that yourself, you know, which is why your
relationships are so very important, and having mentorship is so
very important. I've had a lot of mentors in my life,

(12:17):
and being able to understand how to put the pieces
of the puzzle together. You might have a picture of
who you want to become, a vision of who you
want to become, but you actually don't know how to
put that together, and a lot of times you need help.
You know, you need to have a team of people
or a support system. You know, no one makes it alone.

(12:39):
No man or woman is an ale into themselves, so
you can't make it by yourself. You need a team
of people that can help you do that. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (12:50):
Absolutely, I mean, I think that's really important to mention
that because a lot of people might think like so
self leadership it sounds so devoid of context or devoid
of support systems. But these are not either or things, right,
I mean, you can have self leadership and also really
require a strong support system.

Speaker 2 (13:11):
Well, you know, you you attract who you are, so
your ability to work on yourself allows you to have
more access and more opportunity with people who are who
are like minded with you based on where you want
to go and who you want to become. You know,
I know who you are. You know you're doing the

(13:33):
same thing over and over, which represents about eight billion
people in the world. We're pretty much stuck who are
not thinking of developing a building so when you start
to really focus on your own value and realize that
the value that you give yourself is the value of
the world gives you. The world sees you as you
see yourself, and so how you begin to change and grow,

(13:55):
which is what you have to do today in the
twenty first century, because the world is moving forward. Everybody's
talking about AI, you know, futuristics things, and so you've
got to be able to adapt to that. And the
way you adapt is, like Einstein said, you cannot solve
a problem with the same mindset that cause it. You've
got to be able to change the ways you think.

(14:15):
You've got to be a reader. You have to be
a learner. You have to be a developer of your
own life, and so that you can adjust, change, grow, build, create,
design your future and flow with the way the world
is going, which is you know, globally it's going, globally
is going. You know, you got you create a lot

(14:37):
of networks and build a lot of relationships, and you
know you've got to constantly be a learner and self
directed and lifelong. You've got to be a lifelong learner.
So it's continuous.

Speaker 1 (14:50):
Yeah, for sure. Well we can double click a little
bit on the main aspects of self leadership, self awareness,
self management, other awareness, and other me management. Where did
you kind of come up with that framework?

Speaker 2 (15:04):
Well, you know, I mean I was defined by race
and define early on in my life, and so that
was a label. And you know, when you don't know
who you are, you buy into the labels. It's socially
constructive design, labels that define your existence. And you know,

(15:25):
defined by basketball sports, and defined by family, and defined
by of course my relationship with Oprah being defined by that.
And so you don't know how to define your own existence,
and the world defines you and they put you in
a box and they label you based on that box,

(15:47):
and you know, you buy into a lot of that.
And so you know, there's no tools to self actualize
your own potential or to define your own existence because
it's not in the curriculum. You don't have a regulum.
So you know, So I spent my life a lot
of a lot of time in my in my journey

(16:07):
to be able to figure out how to organize a process,
which is what I teach, a nine step success process
that teaches you how to organize your life around yourself,
self actualize your potential as a as a human being,
find out who you are, Discover who you are, create
a vision for yourself, organize plans and goals, and be

(16:30):
able to kind of be a you know, a strong dreamer,
a strong self actualization, be able to self actualize your
dreams that you have, you know, or your thoughts or
your your ideas, and so you know, those things are
very important as opposed to just kind of doing the

(16:52):
same thing over and over, getting stuck and really not
being able to grow, develop, build or create your own opportunity.

Speaker 1 (17:01):
You know, you you place these in the order for
a reason. There's a certain praiers. So you say, you
have to be self aware before you can learn how
to be a self manager and nurture your abilities, emotions
and leadership capacities. And you need both self awareness and
self management before you can be aware of others needs
and the potential. And you need and you need the
other awareness before you can grow the potential in others.
I think that makes a lot of sense.

Speaker 2 (17:23):
Yeah, yeah, I mean, you know, we put them in
a sequence. So sequence is very important because you follow
our process. And when I learned how to process, you know,
you basically I learned how to think and organize. Order
is the highest level of development. So you're you're constantly
trying to put things in place so that they actually work.

(17:45):
You know, you paint the picture with a vision, and
then what you do is you build backwards with the
pieces and you put the pieces in place to you know,
kind of like a puzzle. You know, they come together
over a long period of time, but the challenge is
organizing pieces of the puzzle and putting them in place
so that you could actually paint the picture. And you

(18:05):
know where you're going, and you're also clear. You have
the confidence and the ability to be able to communicate
exactly what your role is going to be, and you
know what you're trying to achieve to other people, which
aligns you with you know, other relationships. And you continue

(18:26):
to develop a process of improvement all the time because
you're working on yourself. You're working on yourself, and then
the internal turns into external. It turns into all the
external things that you are trying to get in your
life to add more value to what you're doing.

Speaker 1 (18:45):
Yeah, you know, you got to be thinking a lot
about this idea of identity because I feel like we're
in a culture that's you know, a lot of people
play identity politics where they folk. When they say use
the word identity, they're really focusing like demographics, or focusing
on like skin color or gender identity. You're using identity

(19:06):
in a much broader way to focus on people's talents
and passions. And I just wonder what would happen if
our conversation in our country was more a more expanded
idea of identity. Have you put any thought into that.

Speaker 2 (19:22):
Yeah, you know, it's be very interesting. I think identity
is for all of us, you know it's not. I
think it's for all of it that it is for
all of us. What makes a difference where you're from,
what language you speak, or what country you're in. You know,
everybody's trying to figure out how to create value in
their life. The value that you give yourself as a value,

(19:42):
the work the world gives you, The world sees you
as you see yourself. So everybody's focused on the self,
you know, whether they admit it or not. And so
you can't, you know, drink from an empty cup, and
you can't give what you don't. So to be able
to figure out how to be the best self that

(20:06):
you can and then turn that into leadership for yourself
first and then leadership for others, because you're so passionate
about your work, You're so you love what you do.
You you know you're not mad at other people based
on their accomplishments because you're able to again, you know,

(20:28):
you're happy with who you are as a person. And
so identity is like, I don't even know how you
do it today without having an identity, I really don't.
So your ability to again utilize content and information and
make it relevant to who you are is that's really
a kind of that's a gift.

Speaker 1 (20:48):
Oh absolutely. I'm just saying that when you use the
term identity, I think you're using it a little bit
different way than how a lot of people. What people
are focused on right now, and you know, skin color
and things like that, and we're you're from and how
poor you are, and I what I see is your
way of using a day just feels very empowering to me.
It feels like the opposite of a victim mindset. You know,
I'm saying this is just my observation of reading your

(21:11):
work and why it resonates with me because you are
talking about creating a life based on your passions and strengths.
I think that should be available to everyone, and I'm
sure you agree with that.

Speaker 2 (21:24):
Yeah, you know, that's what we're trying to do is
get people to understand the value of themselves and not
be stuck on you know, labels and all the external
things that define them oftentimes. And you know, all of
this is based on the word love, the most powerful
word in the world, you know, being able to choose

(21:47):
love as a way to organize your life around what
you love. So we put it more in practical terms,
in terms of changing the energy around so that you
could be more productive and achieve more because you're focusing
on what you can do as opposed to what you
can't do, looking at the class half full as opposed

(22:08):
to have empty. You know, I know when you focus
on negative, negative comes back to you. The law of
attraction says whatever you put out comes back. So to
be able to transform yourself, you know, has to happen
with loving yourself and caring for yourself.

Speaker 1 (22:27):
Yeah. Absolutely. And also I'm going to guess and that
you also talk about about the importance of changing the
way you think and feel about yourself.

Speaker 2 (22:37):
Yeah, so I mean changing the way you think and
feel about yourself. Again, I go back to what Einstein said,
You cannot solve a problem with the same mindset that
caused it. So your ability to be able to read more,
learn more, experience more allows you to have a different
perspective and to apply that to your own personal professional development. Man,

(23:00):
And to be able to you know, read content, think
about it, you know, figure out new ways to apply
it to your own development. That's I mean that changed
My life changed when I learned that, when I learned
how to learn.

Speaker 1 (23:17):
Yeah, me too, man, me too. Yeah, I was you know,
going from a wasn't even college bound to you know,
I actually love learning. Was such a huge shift for me,
and looks like it was for you too well.

Speaker 2 (23:31):
Obviously you're very bright and very smart. I'm so glad
you discovered it because what you're doing now is you're
empowering people and you're writing books, and that would never
have happened if you had to discover it. You know
how to organize content and make it relevant to your
personal and professional empowerment.

Speaker 1 (23:51):
Absolutely, And it also took you know, the support of
a few a few people, you know, one one person
who asked me in special show had a special teacher
what are you still doing here? And just that one question? Man,
isn't it so powerful? How just like one question from
someone can completely change your whole life?

Speaker 2 (24:08):
Oh my goodness. It's all about the questions. You know,
who are you? What's your vision? What's your plan? You know,
what are your rules of the road, what are your
barriers to success? You know, it's all about answering the questions.

Speaker 1 (24:23):
Yeah, but even just like the support of one other
person can be so powerful.

Speaker 2 (24:27):
Yes, I want to talk.

Speaker 1 (24:29):
About some examples of you know, kind of make this
come alive. You talk about someone called Sidney Weinberg who
went from janitor. I love stories like this. So you
got me all excited when I read these kinds of stories.
These are other stories I love. So talk a little
about Sidney Wine in his journey from janitor to top boss
at Golden Sex.

Speaker 2 (24:49):
Well, you know, the beautiful thing about that is he
learned the process of success and how it worked. And
he also believed in himself. You know, he had a
great believe that and his ability to get things done.
And if you can do it at an early age,
you know, or at a I don't want to say

(25:11):
low point in life. But if you can do the
fundamental things, the things that get you to understand the
process of success is the same for everybody. You just
keep working and you have that drive. Wouldn't make a
different to what kind of job you have. You're able
to again keep growing and know that you can do
better and apply those same principles regardless of what level

(25:35):
you're operating. That So he was that kind of person.

Speaker 1 (25:40):
What about Oprah? You describe Oprah as a true identity leader.
Why is Why is Oprah a true identity leader?

Speaker 2 (25:46):
Well, number one, she knows who she are. She is,
excuse me, and she knows who she is. And she's
one of the greatest communicators in the world. She's been
doing this a long time. She certainly is a great speaker,
and she's been speaking, you know, in church at an
early age, so she carried those same communication skills. Boy,

(26:10):
she's so smart, so bright, very kind, just giving so
much to the world. It's just unbelievable what she's been
able to do. I can't even believe it myself. She's
you know, given scholarships to folks at More House, she's
opened the school in Africa. Well, she's trained these young

(26:31):
girls and they've gone to major schools all over the country,
major universities, and she's changed your life. And she's done
that over and over with her show for so many years.
I think people kind of forget what she's been able
to contribute. It's just fascinating who she is. And she

(26:54):
doesn't do another thing in her life. She's done so much.
Is always trying to help pepeople and give back, and
she's done that over and over and over and over again,
and with her humility and her ability to really just

(27:15):
kind of know what she's capable of doing. And oftentimes
sometimes she's she might get out of her lane every
once in a while, but for the most part, she's
always trying to help and always trying to serve humanity
all over the world. And what she's done for women
and the way she's empowered women and young girls and

(27:38):
just such an unbelievable leader. I just can't say enough
about it. It's amazing to watch her throughout these years.

Speaker 1 (27:47):
It's dead man, it sounds like you're in love with
this woman.

Speaker 2 (27:50):
Well, she's a very special person. She's just extraordinary.

Speaker 1 (27:55):
I know, I know, And you've had a really unique
window on that whole development. So you've really seen this,
so one of the highest levels of self actualization a
human can achieve. You've you've had like a front row
seat to it for how many years? Thirty years?

Speaker 2 (28:08):
Well, I've been you know, around, so it's been I mean,
I would not be here, I would not be able
to do what I'm doing without the influence of not
just her, but many people. I could go on and on.
Bob Brown, I work for it. And we traveled to
South Africa, first American to ever see Nelson Mandela in prison,

(28:31):
only American that I know of, and work with him
a while, and he was one of the Missus King
called him when doctor King was assassinated, assassinated to help
pick up the body, you know, and I had the
privilege of working with him. He was a special assistant

(28:52):
to one of the presidents and so, you know, help
open up the Nigerian government, help build that. So I've
had some great experiences you know, all around that. That
adds a lot of value to you know, support systems

(29:13):
and having great people around you who you can just
watch and learn from because you know, you're green, you
don't know anything. You're trying to figure it out. And
you need support systems to mentors who can.

Speaker 1 (29:27):
Help you absolutely, and I copefully agree with that. What
is the relationship between fear and potential? I think that's
a big, big part of your book.

Speaker 2 (29:42):
What is the relationship between fear and potential? I think
you know, one is what you can't get the potential
that you overcome the fears. So what are your barriers
to success? And sometimes you know, you can self sabotage
yourself a lot because you doubt yourself and there's a

(30:07):
lot of fear there. And you know, if the foundation
of your existence is fear, are negative, then you know,
even when you're comfortable, you kind of look at the
glass half emptans supposed are half full. So the transformation
is always potential. The transformation is always what you can do,

(30:27):
not what you can't do.

Speaker 1 (30:30):
Yeah, Abraham Masol has that great quote that in any moment,
we can choose to move toward growth or stay in safety,
and we have to keep choosing growth again and again
and overcome our fear again and again.

Speaker 2 (30:42):
And beautiful.

Speaker 1 (30:44):
I love that you talk about that in there in
terms of your own identity development, where there's where you
struggled to show who stenogram is you know, apart from Oprah,
apart from all these other things, but just who you
are in terms of and this is what I'm trying
to do today with you, is trying to show the
world the awesome work you're doing. But has it been
a goal at any point?

Speaker 2 (31:05):
I think, just do the work. I think if you
just do the work and do what you authentically can
do based on who you are, I mean, that is
the work, and so that should be part of the
journey and that should be what defines your existence. You know.

(31:28):
So you've got a lot of you're connected to a
lot of other things, but the most important thing is
you just do the work every day. I mean, everybody's equal,
because everybody is twenty four hours. So the question is
what do you do with your time? And so, man,
if you can find your passion and purpose in life
and what you love and what you care about, and

(31:48):
you're lucky enough to be able to work at that,
that's enough that will take you to wherever you need
to go. And you just keep building. And if you
understand the value of now technology, which is where you
right now as a way to enhance your value and
your abilities, you know, and you go align that with

(32:09):
your vision, and you're able to set goals and you
have a process for continuous improvement, and you don't quit.
Every time you fall down, you get back up, you
get back up, you get back up. You know. Then
then that is that's plenty right there, and not really
worry about the rest of what's happening around you.

Speaker 1 (32:30):
Well, I agree. I was just asking you a human,
just vulnerable question, like did you ever struggle with that
in your life?

Speaker 2 (32:36):
Yeah? I mean a struggle every day, you know, with it.
You know, it's always not going anywhere, it's always there.
You know, it depends on again how you see the
world and what your makeup is and what your background is.
You're still dealing with inadequacies and struggle and doubt and
all of that.

Speaker 1 (32:56):
Thank you, Thank you. I think that like the more
you humanize yourself as well, think it really it can
inspire a lot of other people. You know, we're all
kind of trying our best in this world. You know,
you talk about about an action plan, create an action plan, right,
and how to bring it to fruition. Do you have
any advice for people and how to turn that into

(33:16):
kind of make their dream into reality?

Speaker 2 (33:18):
Yeah? I think, you know, having a base, a strong
based on what you love. I mean, the thing I
ask people to do is is to write down everything
they love in their life and then apply information to
that and then develop goals around that, develop a vision
around that, kind of organize a value system around it.

(33:39):
You know, find out what your what your barriers are,
what your just just success are, find out how to
build a team around it. Uh and and and read
about it, learn about it, become an expert in it,
and then just write things down. I mean, you've got
to be able to have a plan because those things

(34:00):
that you write down you could go back to and
figure out how to create an ecosystem around all of
that together. It really just makes a huge difference when
you start to plan and write things down, because you know,
you got fifty thousand thoughts going through your mind every
single day. You're not going to remember everything, so you've
got to be able to write it down and organize it.

Speaker 1 (34:21):
And also, you talk about committing to self actualization, talk
a little bit more about that.

Speaker 2 (34:28):
Well, working on yourself, trying to improve yourself again, being
clear on how you're going to spend your time, eliminate
all the time wasters. Focus. Whatever you focus on expands
you know, being able to focus and and and stay

(34:50):
on track. You know, all those things are important in
terms of self actualization.

Speaker 1 (34:57):
I meant to ask this earlier on like how do
you even how do you find self actualization? How do
you define it? Personally?

Speaker 2 (35:04):
I have define it by just working on yourself. I
mean right now, it's you know, most people focus on
the outside world as a way to define their existence,
and so they never really get to work on self.
So when you start to turn it around and now
everything is about what your program is going to be

(35:27):
for that day. You know, what's your routine going to be,
how are you going to improve that? You know, what
are you're trying to get accomplished? Who you want to become?
Looking at that putting all of that together, it just
gives you the opportunity to be able to organize a
process for you know, self actualization and again going back

(35:50):
to working on yourself. So that really it's based on
the fact that the more you have, the more you
can give the other people. Again, I think that it's
a great way to uh be a uh you know,
be a servant leader to a lot of folks outside
of your own you know, interests.

Speaker 1 (36:12):
I love that, you know, and it's just there's not
there's not that much of a focus on self actualization
these days. So it's just so refreshing to see that.
You know, a lot of people they may focus on
happiness or they focus on achievement, but neither of those
things are self actualization necessarily. So it's really refreshing to
see it. Is there anything else you want to add
about your work on it, your really groundbreaking work on

(36:33):
identity leadership, Well.

Speaker 2 (36:35):
It's just that it's continuous, it doesn't stop. You continually involve.
I like the fact that you're able to improve. You know,
you fall down, you get back up, you you relearn information,
you learn things from other people from your experiences. Uh.

(36:56):
And it's constant, you know, it's constant production in its
constant work is constant, constantly you know, you know, working
on yourself and figuring out how you can do it better.
And you know, we live in one of the greatest
countries in the world, so to be able to have
access to systems and the experiences we have, and you know,

(37:21):
America just provides so many opportunities for us. And now
we have the global marketplace. You know, again, we couldn't
live in a better time than now because we have
access to so many resources and you know, so much
information and you can learn on your own and so
you know, being able to have an identity as a

(37:44):
foundation for development, creativity and learning and understanding to me
is just really uh, you know, exciting.

Speaker 1 (37:55):
It's really exciting. And I want to end with some
sort of encouragement from Steppman who wrote quote, you are
well on your way to furthering your potential as a
day leader. Keep on going. It's a journey that, no
matter how hard at times, is well worth it. It's
a journey that leads to the satisfying and fulfilling life
that you have deep down and envisioned for yourself. My
best wishes to you as you continue your journey. Stebman.

(38:16):
I want to just give best wishes to you on
your journey as well. I really made it my aim
today to get your work out there to my audience
and the know a little bit more about who Steedman
Graham is. So thank you, Thank you so much.

Speaker 2 (38:30):
I appreciate the opportunity Scott, and congratulations to you and
all that you do for so many other people

Speaker 1 (38:38):
Thank you so much means a lot.
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Host

Scott Barry Kaufman

Scott Barry Kaufman

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