October 30, 2024 • 64 mins
A couple living in Portugal reflects on why they left the US to build a new life together.
Afterwards a caller reflects on her cottagecore journey, a caller feels like they’re living on new game plus, and a final caller tries to deal with chronic pain.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, how's it going.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
Hey, what's up? How you doing?
Speaker 1 (00:03):
I'm doing great.
Speaker 3 (00:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
Everyone says this, but I can't believe we're actually talking.
Called it like sixty times.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
I'm excited, So I'm excited to talk to you too.
What's your name, Doug.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
I'm Nico, Nico.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Yeah, like Nico Belick.
Speaker 4 (00:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Yeah, let's go bowling, man, let's go bowling. Well, Nico,
what's up?
Speaker 4 (00:29):
Man?
Speaker 2 (00:30):
Would you want to talk about today on the Gecko podcast?
Speaker 5 (00:33):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Well, I I kind of wanted to, so I've been
thinking about this for a while, Like I called in.
I wanted to pay you a compliment. I know it's
been kind of an emotional stream for you earlier today
you had the other call, but like, oh sure, I
just find you so like wise and empathetic, and I
love the way that you help people through their problems
(00:54):
without any judgment. It's it's just super cool and super chill.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Uh yeah, man, but I don't want to make it
you know too. Uh crazy, I'm calling you from Portugal. Yeah,
I'm here visiting. Uh. I've been here with my girlfriend
for about a month and they're really really fallen in
love with the place. And one of the coolest things
(01:22):
that I've done since I've been here is I met
a famous alpaca.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
You met a famous like.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
An I page. Yeah, if you've ever seen the movie
Color Out of Space, the new one with Nick Cage,
it's got a couple of alpacas in there, and those
alpacas live in Portugal. And we were looking on, you know, online,
(01:52):
and we found this lady with an alpaca farm and
she's like, yeah, you know, I've done some filming with them,
with like Nick Cage, and she just casually dropped it.
But obviously you can't just casually drop a connection to
Nick Cage. So we asked about it and it was
those out packets. It was pretty rad.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
I'm curious more about Portugal too, So what made you
want to move? What made you come there? A month ago?
Speaker 1 (02:19):
Well, I guess two years ago. My girlfriend and I
were talking and we're like, what would you do if
you had all the money or just you know, the
ability to do anything? And I said, I don't know,
fuck it, let's just like just go to Portugal and
live and work remotely and exist in Europe somewhere. And
(02:42):
because there's a lot of talk about how Portugal is
very welcoming with their immigration programs and stuff like this,
and then we kind of looked at each other after
I said it, We're like, why aren't we doing that?
So we took a visit out here last year and
really fell in love with with the place, and so
(03:03):
decided this year, let's let's stay here for like a
month and make sure that it's a realistic thing, like
to live in another country that you don't speak the language,
really and it's just been awesome. Man, it's been so
just chill and beautiful, and Portuguese people are so wonderful
(03:24):
and welcoming. Yeah, it's it's been an awesome experience. So
so we're kind of moving forward with that.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
Where are you guys? Are you in Lisbon?
Speaker 1 (03:35):
No, we did visit Lisbon and Lisbon was awesome, But
we're in a town I get as a city actually
about three hours by train north of Lisbon called a Vedro,
and it's a it's it's a place that doesn't have
a Starbucks, So like a Vedro, a the a r.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
I are a Vero Portugal. Oh wow, that looks that
looks very colorful.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
Yeah, it's super like charming and quaint and it's got
like this beautiful old town but with a twenty minute
walk to like a proper city where you can you know,
like do city things and eat rabin and go to
the Indian Spices store and stuff like this. I mean,
(04:27):
they have they have everything. It's it's wonderful.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
Yeah. So I'm I'm actually very interested to talk to
you because I'm obsessed with the idea of like moving
to a foreign country and like seeing what's up and
you know, all that kind of stuff. And I'm always
like googling around for places to go and ideas and stuff,
and a Portugal keeps coming up as like an affordable
(04:52):
expat location.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
Yeah. Yeah, it's been great as far as affordability. I
mean it's you know, it's expensive to eat out every night.
I'm sure you know. I've been talking about going to
airbnbs and stuff. It's it's not cheap, but we we've
been cooking a little bit. Groceries are you know, reasonably priced.
(05:15):
There's not a huge tipping culture, which is nice because
I feel like, you know, you go out and the
person that is waiting on you is like getting paid properly,
and there's not a pressure to be like, oh shit,
I got to pay an extra twenty percent on top
of it.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
M hm.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
So it's it's nice from that aspect too.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
You know, what do you what do you guys do?
Speaker 3 (05:38):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (05:38):
So I work for a software company and I do
like a little bit of consulting on the side. And
my girlfriend, she's currently she's a medical assistant, but she's
going to school for esthetician like skincare. So the plan is, right, well,
(05:59):
we'll open up, she'll open a business here once we
get here, and wow, and I'll continue to work remotely.
And yeah, holy shit.
Speaker 2 (06:08):
So you're so your girlfriend was So your girlfriend's a
medical how does she work from home? If she's a
medical assistant? I would assume she had to be like
at a hospital or something.
Speaker 1 (06:17):
Well, she doesn't work from home. She works in a
clinic in Portugal. No no, no, no, no, back home,
back home. I live Atlanta's home for me for us.
So she works in a clinic there, and uh, she's
right here. She's really excited.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
Hi, get go, oh Hi, what's your what's your what's
your name?
Speaker 5 (06:40):
Hi?
Speaker 6 (06:41):
My name is Emi Lee.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
Hey, what's up Emily?
Speaker 5 (06:46):
Everything is good.
Speaker 6 (06:47):
I'm so excited that we were able to talk to you.
We've been listening to your podcast for a while and
every time we're like, oh my gosh, we should call.
And it's so exciting to be talking to you.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Oh, it's exciting to be talking to you too. I
guess I'll ask you all the questions I was curious about.
So you're you're you work at a clinic in and Okay,
so you guys are both in your you're calling currently
from every year rold Portugal, but you work as a
as a medical assistant in Atlantas or are you like
(07:19):
kind of taking a little sabbatical.
Speaker 6 (07:22):
So yeah, so we we don't live in the city city.
We leave in Canton. I mean it's for you, five
minutes up north of Atlanta. But you know, if I
say Canton is kind of like, so we say Atlanta
and yeah, I work in a clinic and it's a
(07:44):
Navy clinic. So basically we give infusion of vitamins and
stuff like that, two people. And it's been a new job.
Been very excited to learn new stuff.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Very cool, very cool. And so you're gonna play you're
gonna open a what what kind of business are you
gonna open in? In Portugal?
Speaker 6 (08:02):
So the plan is to do an institusian program in
the United States and be able to bring that knowledge
to Portugal. So that will open the door to have
my own business doing facials and taking care of people's skin.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Man, you guys are fing awesome. That's so cool. How
did you? How did you? How did you? How did
you two meet?
Speaker 6 (08:27):
So it's a very cute story. So I was working
in a paintball field, working in a sorry.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
You said, a paintball field.
Speaker 6 (08:37):
I have paintball where they should have paint Yeah. Yeah,
so we I was working there for a for a
while and I started getting along with Nichol's parents, her mom,
his mom. It's very cool. So we are friends and
then I ended up a relationship and one day Nicola
(08:59):
asked me if I want to go out for treatma,
But then that didn't happen. So we went out for
New Year's Year and he cooked a traditional meal from
my country, which was very lovely, and we haven't separated.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Sinton, that's so nice. Where are you originally from?
Speaker 6 (09:19):
I'm from Ecuador, Ecuador.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Very cool, very nice. What what was I going to say?
What was the meal that he cooked from Ecuador?
Speaker 6 (09:29):
It's called that meal. It's a pork and it's the
way that it's roasted as well, and then it's life.
And the way that we that at home is with
like a sandwich form with a different type of bread
and then we put something that is called gurguillo and
basically onions, tomatoes, lemon and that on top with a
(09:51):
spicy sauce and it's delicious.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
How how long you guys been together for.
Speaker 6 (09:57):
This genre is going to be three years?
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Very nice, very cool. Wow, paintball, paintball led to love.
That's cool.
Speaker 6 (10:09):
I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (10:12):
That's very good man. I'm excited for you. Do you
guys know anyone in uh in Avieria? Did you meet
any crazy people? You got any like Kramer esque neighbors
barging into your house?
Speaker 6 (10:27):
No, but everybody's very nice. We actually, in every place
activity that we've been going, we tried to talk to
people and see like what they do, how they got here,
even my tourists, and it's been very nice to hear
from them, and then we keep in contact. Actually, the
last time that we came, we did a cooking glass
(10:49):
and we got along with some other tourists and we
still talk to them.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
Cool man. Very cool. Are there any other, well, anything
else that you have planned for for Portuguese life for
the future, like any things you want to do or
like other places you want to travel or any of
that kind of shit.
Speaker 6 (11:08):
Actually, yeah, Like Portugal is such an amazing little country
because he has so many things to explore, like the
south it's so much forest and then you know, the
bitches are so so nice, and you know, there are
so many things that you can explore. And yeah, we're
just no thinking about that yet because we've been like,
(11:32):
you're not going to place to place to place and
I don't know it. But yeah, definitely explore more the
country and you know the other countries aults in Europe.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
That's cool. How old are you guys? If you don't
want me asking, I'm curious what stage you're at in
life that you're doing this.
Speaker 6 (11:48):
Son MIIKOI is thirty nine. He's going to be very
nine next week actually, and I'm twenty eight.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
Cool fucking cool man. That rocks. That rocks.
Speaker 7 (11:57):
Yes, man.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
Are you guys gonna have a kid?
Speaker 6 (12:00):
M So we are planning on not having kids when
we met, We talk about it and we are very
definitely perspectives of having a kid. You know, it's not
just the apparent, it's so much that comes with it.
And I don't know, I don't think we're ready for
(12:20):
that faith on our lives yet or at all.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
Interesting.
Speaker 6 (12:27):
Interesting what he's saying, nothing can change, things can change. Okay,
he's going to talk to you about this because it's
doing kind of like a long talk, so he's going
to tast you his perspective.
Speaker 5 (12:42):
Cool.
Speaker 4 (12:46):
Yeah, yeah, I mean it's it's a lot of kids, right,
It's a big decision to make, and then you know,
it's a scary world, I feel like.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
So it's it's hard. It's hard to know where you're
going to be at that time. My my sister's got kids.
They're they're young, uh, and they're they're wonderful, they're beautiful kids.
Speaker 4 (13:13):
But like they're a lot.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
Man, Yeah, dude, and it takes so much.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
Of yourself, yeah, to be a parent. So it's hard
to know. I think if you're if you're really ready
for that, right. So yeah, so it's it's it's unclear,
leaning towards no, but you know this is a possibility.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Well, it takes for telling me about your life. One
of the reasons I like doing this part. I really
mean this. I'm trying to figure out what I'm going
to do, how I'm like, what I want to do
with my life, and so I like asking people invasive
questions about what they're going to do with theirs. I'm
just check, I'm just curious. I'm just like, because you
there's no roadmap to how to do anything ever, so
(13:57):
the only thing you can really do is like listen
into how other people are navigating their lives and listen
to your own brain and kind of you know, take
in that. It's cool. I love it. I love what
you guys are doing. I think it's so fucking cool
to just uh, you know, get together with your partner
and go to a go to a new place and
(14:20):
try to you know, continue continue to expand and grow
your fucking brain and life. I think that's really cool.
Speaker 1 (14:31):
Yeah, I mean it's all about, you know, finding new
life experiences and finding a community and contributing to it. Yeah.
I'm becoming part of something, you know.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
So what's your name, Chris Nico? All right, Well this
kind of is basically the same thing.
Speaker 6 (14:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Well, well Nico, thanks for thanks for chatting with me. Man,
did you do you feel like, you guys got what
you wanted out this phone call.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
I yeah, absolutely, I just I just wanted to be
on the phone because you, like she said, you got
me listening to you all the time. So it's just
cool to be a part of this community and this
experience in another way. So thank you taking our call.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
You guys have a good one. Man, you guys take care.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Thanks then you girls.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Please, Oh man, this those two have such a nice,
beautiful life. That's so great. You know, I really meant
that this. I Uh, I ask invasive questions about things
because well, one of the reasons I think people listen
to this podcast is too uh for the reason I
(15:44):
was just describing is to like getting it. It's a
little you can kind of you kind of only have
your own brain and your own lived experience, and it's
kind of nice to listen to what's going on in
other people's brains and lives because it can help inform
your own a little bit. Uh. I'd like to do
that some someday. Go to like a well, I went
(16:04):
to Portugal, I went to Lisbon. I did a show
there a year ago. But like, uh, going to some
random place to do a weird thing I don't know
why I'm phrasing it like that, but uh yeah, shout
out to those people. They were cool. I was about
to say, I'm sorry I forgot that guy's name, but
I'm kind of not because like if you quiz like
(16:27):
if you win, ahay. Here's my thing about names with
and I've said this eight thousand times. What I'm gonna
say it again. If you were to like quiz me
on like that guy's life or like that couple's life,
if you were to like write down a list of
if you were like quiz me on like specific things
that maybe they said about themselves, I'd get at least
(16:48):
fifty percent on that ques I don't remember what the
guy said he did for a living, I would actually
probably get a forty percent. Here's the thing. I remember
the vibe of the conversation that I just had, whether
or not. I remember that I liked those two. I
remembered that I was inspired by them. I remember that
(17:12):
I enjoyed talking to them, and I remember the general
sentiment and vibe that they get off gave off. Even
if I don't remember a name, uh but I do.
His name was Nico, and I think her name was
Emily or maybe it was Chris. I don't know. I
(17:33):
don't know.
Speaker 8 (17:34):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
Hello, Hello, Hi, What is your name? Walker Walker, Texas Ranger?
What's up?
Speaker 6 (17:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 8 (17:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (17:47):
Not much?
Speaker 8 (17:47):
Wait? Is this Lyle?
Speaker 2 (17:49):
This is Lyle? This is me?
Speaker 8 (17:51):
Hi?
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Hello? What is who are you? You're a Walker?
Speaker 8 (17:54):
I'm Walker, but I'm dressed as Bob Belcher mom and
my Halloween costume right now?
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Oh you do have what are your hellen plans?
Speaker 3 (18:01):
Uh?
Speaker 5 (18:02):
Not much.
Speaker 8 (18:03):
Me and my girlfriend we don't. We don't like party,
but we're going to like hand out candy to kids.
It's gonna be great.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
That's nice. That's a sweet. Do people still trick or treat?
Or is it has? Has the world just gotten too
crazy for that?
Speaker 8 (18:20):
I don't we were talking about that. I don't think
people trick or treat any more because of COVID. I
think it's all like trunk or treat?
Speaker 2 (18:26):
Now, where are you going to hand out candidate kids?
Speaker 5 (18:31):
We live in.
Speaker 8 (18:31):
Vermont, so it's like a little small town called Bristol.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
That's cool? Is it?
Speaker 3 (18:36):
Like?
Speaker 2 (18:36):
Uh? I mean I grew up in the suburbs and
there were like all these cul de sacs and it
was you know, Uh do you are. What's the like landscape?
Are you like in a little town? Is it a suburb?
Speaker 8 (18:49):
Yeah, it's it's like a little mountain town. But we
live on a flower farm right now.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
You live on a flower farm.
Speaker 8 (18:58):
I live on a flower farm. I work on the farm.
Or season's almost over. But yeah, yeah, it's like this
really dope house. We actually have to move in like
a few weeks, so I'm actually we're really upset about it,
but it'll be good in the long runs.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
Wait, tell me more about your life. You live on
a flower farm in Vermont. Who are you? How did you?
How did you become that?
Speaker 8 (19:26):
I'm I'm the Texas Ranger. No, I'm just I grew
up in South Carolina and I decided I wanted to
be a sea instructor. So like three years ago, I
moved out to Vermont and best decision I ever made.
So now I spend my life doing seasonal work. I've
(19:46):
been doing it.
Speaker 5 (19:47):
For like three years. Sorry, I just got a.
Speaker 8 (19:52):
Little nervous because I just realized some on the phone
with you. But but yeah, no, I've been doing seasonal
work for like three years. So I ski instruct in
the winter and I've been kind of like bouncing around
from different jobs for like summer and spring and stuff.
Speaker 2 (20:10):
Cool. What's a flower house? Like, you guys make flowers
in the house.
Speaker 8 (20:18):
No, we like so we like grow the flowers, so
we like work on the farm. But the house is
just like on the property. So when he hired me,
he was like, do you want to live on the property?
And I was like, hell yeah. And it's it's a
really cool howthing. It has curved walls. We call it
like the boat or the beehive.
Speaker 2 (20:40):
It has curved walls.
Speaker 8 (20:42):
As curved walls, it looks like it looks like a beehive.
Speaker 5 (20:46):
It does look like a beehive.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
That's cool.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
Man.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
How long you've been living there?
Speaker 8 (20:51):
Not long, like seven months?
Speaker 2 (20:53):
And where are you gonna go?
Speaker 8 (20:57):
We're moving down to like southern Vermonts to teach ski
So I teach skiing at this resort called Mount Snow
and shout out Mount Snow. But yeah, so I've been
teaching there for the last few years, so I want
to move back down to go teach there. But I'm
super bummed to leave the house. That's actually why I
was trying to call you. It was like to debate
(21:19):
if I should move or not?
Speaker 2 (21:23):
Well, why yeah, why are you moving?
Speaker 8 (21:25):
Well, mainly just to ski instruct because it's like it's
my favorite thing ever. It's like I'm so passionate about it.
It's like someone who grew up in South Carolina. It
was like always like a fun thing. My parents like
would take me for spring break and stuff, and I
just like fell in love with it. So I was
always like, I want to ski instructure when I grow up, and.
Speaker 5 (21:49):
I've just stuck with it.
Speaker 8 (21:50):
I really love it. So I knew if I didn't
do it, I'd be like super depressed this winter.
Speaker 2 (21:57):
And so you're moving to go do it?
Speaker 8 (22:00):
Yeah, yeah, so we got.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Yeah that sounds you I don't have you don't it
sounds like a great idea. Yeah, I just talk.
Speaker 3 (22:09):
Yeah, I get.
Speaker 8 (22:09):
I'm so excited about It's just like you know how
like moving is, and it's just it's so stressful. It's like,
so I read a statistic, it's like the most stressful
thing to do in your lifetime. And because young people
move so much, we're like the most just out generation,
which tracks I think.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
That's a fascinating thing. Is really is that the most
stressful thing you do is moving.
Speaker 8 (22:29):
I think someone my best friend told me that, and
she knows so much.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
Okay, so you've got you've got your sources properly cited.
That's good, exactly exactly. I mean, yeah, it's stressful to move.
That's why I lived out of airbnbs for so long.
I didn't want to fucking uh deal with it.
Speaker 8 (22:47):
Yeah, and moving furniture is the worst. We keep moving
into new into furnished places. Everywhere I've lived in the
last like three years been pretty much fully furnished.
Speaker 2 (22:56):
How'd you meet your girlfriends?
Speaker 8 (22:58):
We met at the Mountain Mountain funny enough doesn't ski though.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
Yeah, what what was she doing there if she didn't ski?
Speaker 8 (23:08):
She was so we work in like the ski school,
so she was kind of looking after the little kids
and dealing with the parents, which is probably the worst
job you can have in ski school.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
Right, Yeah? What how long? How long are you living
in southern Vermont for?
Speaker 6 (23:25):
Uh?
Speaker 8 (23:25):
We have a year leaf, which is the first time
I've ever signed a lease longer than eight months.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Cool. You sound like you you're doing good. You sound
like you've you've got a nice uh life. Just from
my where I sit, it looks you you have a
nice life.
Speaker 8 (23:44):
I I like, I like where I am.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
Yeah, do you feel good every day? Do you feel peaceful?
I know?
Speaker 8 (23:53):
You know That's the thing is like I if I had, like,
you know, if I could go back and like tell
younger me where I am, Like they'd be so excited,
you know, Like this is awes. That's like the best
situation I could have ever predicted for myself. You know,
I'm living like cottage Core lesbian dream right now, but
like still I wake up and I'm like, I'm not satisfied.
(24:14):
It's like there's just like more I want to do,
But it's I'm very happy with where I am. But
I have a hard time livingly, like you talk about
it all the time. I have a really hard time
being present and just trying to like live in the
moment like I was at I was listening to you
today at work, and I was just trying to really
like taking like oh, I'm cutting these merrygolds right now
(24:36):
and I'm like smelling them and like trying to take
in every moment. But it's hard.
Speaker 2 (24:41):
It's so hard. What was I said? What was I saying?
What was I saying?
Speaker 8 (24:45):
I don't remember. It was the new one it was
the one you put out yesterday.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
I was reading now, I like, I know I am
saying this to be funny, but it is also true.
I always forget that I have a podcast where I
say stuff.
Speaker 8 (25:00):
Yeah, it is kind of wild. I'm trying to I've
just been trying to start a podcast with my friends,
and I realized talking is just like really hard when
you're not when you have to.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
Yeah, talking is hard. Talking is hard. I'm talking is hard.
I'm thinking about like, uh, I'm thinking about a life.
I think about a version of life that feels really
really really easy, and when I'm thinking about it, it
involves a lot of not talking.
Speaker 8 (25:37):
Like yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:40):
Yeah, or like a lot of like being around large
groups of people that you're like included in but you're
not talking to any of them. That's kind of my dream.
My dream is to constantly be in large rooms of
people that like maybe that like I've organized together and
(26:04):
who are all my friends and that I care about,
and then just not talk to any of them, but
just just be physically present and uh drunk and just
not saying anything to anyone, just looking around and thinking.
(26:28):
But you're still there, You're still with people, You're still
you're socializing when you don't have to say a word.
It sounds like a dream to me.
Speaker 8 (26:36):
That is the dream because like the vibe is already there.
You don't have to like make it in it, right.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
There's nothing. There is an Onion article that's so funny
and it says something like ninety nine percent of conversations
do not need to happen. And it's true.
Speaker 8 (26:56):
It's true most I saw that Onion article.
Speaker 2 (26:59):
Yeah, this knows of the times you don't have to
It is hard to talk. It is hard to talk.
You ever talk? You ever just talked one on one
to one person? It's it's it's genuinely so exhausting.
Speaker 8 (27:13):
Yeah, it's what you do every day though.
Speaker 2 (27:17):
Yeah, I mean it's a little different. It's a little
different because I do it. I'll say that it's well,
it is exhausting, but it's it's a little different because
I do it in the context of recording a podcast.
And I think that that context, Like you ever like
been at a party or something and you found yourself
(27:38):
in a one on one conversation with someone, Yeah, surely
the most exhausting, Like when you're at a party and
you're like standing exact when you're at a party and
you're like standing in a circle of people and you're
not talking but yet. But if you're standing around at
a party and you're in a circle of people and
you're not talking, and you feel a little anxious that
(27:59):
you haven't talked because you're like, oh yeah, maybe I'm like,
you know, you just feel weird about that. That's bad.
But if you're if you can get to a situation
where you're in a group, you're standing at a party
or at a thing, and you're in a group of
people and you're not talking, but you feel comfortable, that's
that's optimal. You know. It's like if you've ever been
at a at a like a whatever and you're just
(28:21):
you one on one, are talking to one person and
you have to keep thinking of things to say, it's
just so exhausting.
Speaker 5 (28:29):
Yeah, we also can't listen.
Speaker 8 (28:31):
I find that I'm like, i feel like I'm like
an entertainer sometimes at party, Like I love.
Speaker 5 (28:36):
To talk to people because it's a lot, it's a lot.
Speaker 8 (28:40):
But like we were just we were just at a
wedding and like, you know, it's like a ton of
fucking people. My social battery has never been so in
my entire life.
Speaker 5 (28:49):
But that was also the.
Speaker 8 (28:51):
Kind of vibe where like, if you don't want to
say anything, you can just sit there and I don't
feel uncomfortable. So it's like, but I feel like you
have to know the people, like these are people I've
been in social situations with for like a while, you know.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
Yeah, yeah, I like it too. I really actually do.
Like sometimes I'm in the mood, you know, it is
exhaust but it is always it depends on my mood.
Sometimes I'm really to talk to people. I throw a
little party at my house a little while ago one time,
(29:25):
and uh, I was just I stood in the corner
and I didn't talk to anyone for not the whole time,
but for just like like five minutes. And it was
the best that I felt because I'd gathered everyone into
one room, but I didn't have to say, I didn't
have to do anything. It was great.
Speaker 8 (29:44):
Yeah, you just provided the stays. That's kind of the
best situation.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
Yeah. Like, like I do my live shows and my
tours and stuff. I'm trying to figure out a way
that I can, like how do I do a show?
But I but not my whole show was about talking
to people. I'm like, how do I do a version
of it where I just don't actually have to say
anything at all? Can like, can I gather a but
(30:09):
can I gather a bunch of people to a theater
and give somehow give them a good experience? But I
but without having to actually do anything.
Speaker 5 (30:19):
Yeah, it's like a riddle.
Speaker 8 (30:21):
I'm trying to think. Yeah, I feel like you could.
I feel like, well, you could just show up to
a place to sit there.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
I'm being I'm being like seventy I'm being like seventy
percent facetious right now. Anyway, anyway, what's your name again?
Walker Walker, Texas Ranger. Well, this was thanks for this
was you know what? This was an easy conversation. This
(30:49):
was this was this felt easy. So thanks for making
this easy.
Speaker 5 (30:55):
That's great.
Speaker 8 (30:56):
That's all I ever wanted was a chill conversation with you.
So thank you so much for kicking out. You took
me completely off guard. I had just walked inside of
my Bob Belcher costume, so I did not expect it.
Speaker 2 (31:09):
Well, enjoy uh, enjoy whatever you're gonna do with with
uh with that Bob Belcher costume.
Speaker 8 (31:19):
Thank you, Thank you so much.
Speaker 7 (31:21):
God, bless you Walker, Thank you bye, GAK, see you later.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
I don't have a Halloween costume. I only have I
have my Gecko costume. But if I went out for
Halloween in my Gecko costume, that'd be really lame. By
the way I do like talking to people.
Speaker 7 (31:41):
I do.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
I don't think I would do what I do if
I didn't.
Speaker 3 (31:45):
But.
Speaker 2 (31:47):
It is undenied. It is sometimes I'm like in such
a I mean, you guys know, everyone knows what it's
like to have different states of energy, and sometimes I,
you know, I really have felt at times in which
I was at the head and there's no energy to
say anything ever to anyone, and then times where I
(32:09):
was like, I'm a genius and I can talk to
anyone who ever, And it kind of oscillates between those
two things. I don't know if it's like a I
don't know if I'm fucking bitepolar or whatever the fuck,
but like, uh, it's just I always just feel like
I always isolate. I feel like I'm always oscillating between like, oh,
(32:30):
I don't ever want to talk to anyone ever again,
and then like, oh, I think I can talk to anyone.
So I don't know it's a weird thing. Hello, Yeah,
what's up?
Speaker 3 (32:41):
Bro?
Speaker 1 (32:41):
Hey?
Speaker 2 (32:42):
What's up? Player? What's your name?
Speaker 3 (32:44):
Carter?
Speaker 7 (32:45):
Carter?
Speaker 2 (32:46):
What's going on? Carter? How's life?
Speaker 3 (32:49):
Honestly? Pretty fucking great? Man? Like, I've kind of done
everything and now I'm just like, what the fuck else.
Speaker 4 (32:56):
Do I do?
Speaker 3 (32:57):
Wow?
Speaker 2 (32:58):
That's I would like, I'm so excited to talk to you.
You've done it? Do you mean for the day or
just in life? You've done it all?
Speaker 3 (33:05):
Dude? Like I feel like I've pretty much done it all.
Like I'm like thirty one, I've gotten my masters, I
had like a good job, I got a got a
wife and three dogs, and I mean I don't want kids.
I play all the video games and smoke all the
weed and like what else is there?
Speaker 4 (33:20):
Now?
Speaker 5 (33:21):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (33:23):
Oh my god, what I don't know what else is there?
I don't know what what? Yeah? That's what do you think?
The answer to that question is, well.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
I mean, I guess the only important thing for me
right now is like playing video games, like I like
fighting games like a shit ton. Yeah I can say
shit right, yeah right, yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:41):
You can say whatever, man, Yeah, well go ahead, can't
keep going.
Speaker 3 (33:49):
No, I'm just saying I like I like play like
a lot of fighting games, and I like, I'm trying
to get mastered Rank and six Fighter Street Fighter six
And I don't know if you you know about Melee.
I don't know if you know about Rivals of Eve.
That's a new Oh okay, well I apologize. Shame on
me for fucking assuming. But yeah no, I'm like, I'm
like just griding those, and after I've hit masters on those,
(34:10):
I'm just like, what the fuck else am I gonna do?
Speaker 2 (34:12):
So let's get back to your existential car. Are you
actually having an existential crisis? You don't sound like you are.
You sound like you're doing it.
Speaker 3 (34:18):
No, dude, Like I feel like I'm doing all right,
But I feel like after like another year of just
I don't know, New Game Plus, I'm gonna start freaking out.
Speaker 2 (34:26):
Man, Yeah, you are kind of on New Game Plus.
I mean, I don't know, I really do. Like my
gut really please don't take anything I ever say seriously,
but my gut is telling me that you could just
play video games and be nice to your wife and
dogs and then die, and you did, you did, you
(34:49):
would get an A plus on your homework. You know,
I don't know life is uh. I'm gonna talk about
something completely unrelated, but still. I went. I was at
meaw Wolf in uh Dallas, shout out to me wolf,
meowolf rocks. And I found this little uh book or
(35:11):
something that was in the exhibit, and it said something like,
how can you ever be doing nothing when you are
always being a being? And I was like, that makes
a lot of sense, you know what I mean? Like
the bare minimum of existence is not particularly hard. You
went above and beyond, you formed the what sounds I mean?
(35:33):
You've told me nothing about the quality of your relationship,
and I've asked you no questions about it, but I
just blanketly assume that it's going well. You have three
dogs who all sound all three of your dogs sound
like they're not dead.
Speaker 3 (35:47):
They're all right under my feet, laying down, kind of chilling.
Speaker 2 (35:50):
So you don't have a kid, then you don't sound
like you want one. You have food and your everyone
everyone has food. Yeah, play video games and play video
games and then die. I guess I don't know what else.
You wouldn't be anything else you did outside of playing
video games and dying would be just a bonus.
Speaker 3 (36:14):
All right, That's that's fair. I'm trying to play guitar,
but I kind of gave up on that because I'm
fucking horrible. I'd rather press buttons.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
Well, tell me more about your the crisis of New
Game Plus?
Speaker 3 (36:26):
All right? So, I mean, I actually don't even know
how old you are. I assume that you're like, what,
late twenties, early thirties.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
I'm dying. I'm about to turn twenty seven.
Speaker 3 (36:35):
Oh god, Well, once you hit thirty, you know, blah
blah blah, it goes downhill. But no, like, dude, you
hit like a certain like you know, threshold where you're
kind of happy doing whatever. I've heard you're on like
previous streams and whatnot. But have you ever felt like
you're on New Game Plus?
Speaker 2 (36:53):
There's a lot I actually don't feel like I'm on
New Game Plus. I feel like, uh, do you want to?
You know how I actually feel? I feel like I'm
I'm I'm in Uh like you ever play you ever
play Zelda? And like maybe you've beaten a couple dungeons
(37:13):
and you're walking around the overworld map trying to find
out what you're supposed to do next to progress the game. Yeah,
and you're just walking around high rule, trying to figure
out what where are you supposed to go? What are
you supposed to do?
Speaker 8 (37:27):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (37:28):
And eventually get frustrated and you look it up on
the internet. That's kind of what my life feels like,
except I can't just look it up on the internet
because it's not linear. So I don't feel like I'm
in New Game Plus. There's a lot that I still desire.
I don't think I feel good enough regularly to consider
myself on New Game Plus. There's aspects of my life
(37:52):
where I'm like, I don't know if continuing further down,
there's aspects of my life where I'm like, I don't
know if approaching this the way that I've been approaching
it uh historically is going to yield different results. But no,
I definitely still uh I, there's there's a lot that
(38:12):
I want for all.
Speaker 3 (38:15):
Right, that's fair. I got another question, if you don't
mind full of them at this point? Yeah, okay, So
if you're not a New Game Plus, is there like
a point where you're like gonna get like a new
expansion pack? Because I kind of feel like I'm I'm
ready for a new XPEC at this point.
Speaker 2 (38:28):
Am I gonna get a new expansion pack. I've I'm
you know, Uh, that's a that's a great question. That's
a great question. I've been thinking about that. I think
about that. I feel a little stuck. But uh, whether
or not you get in the new expansion pack kind
of has to I kind of if I if if
I could, I'd put the game down for like a
fucking second and then come back. That's kind of Yeah,
(38:54):
maybe that's being in a coma. Maybe that's being in
a coma. Maybe that's maybe that's not being in a No,
I don't want to do I don't want to be
in a clone. Maybe that's just like going for a walk.
Maybe that's what that is. But uh, can you say
your original question again? It was a good one. Oh
so expansion packs.
Speaker 3 (39:11):
Is Yeah, the expansion pack a lot of that.
Speaker 2 (39:14):
It feels like it's mental if you fully believe I
think that you, I mean, you have to have a
lot of courage to add an expansion pack. You have
to kind of you know, code it yourself. You have
to make a random weird dude, do you have to
do stuff?
Speaker 3 (39:33):
I got bored earlier in the year, so I started
like running marathons and stuff, and like I've done like
like like three half marathons and like like four ten k's,
and I thought that that was going to be like
my x PAC but it was just like really really
bad DC with like no content, like no in game
shot type shit.
Speaker 2 (39:51):
Yeah. Yeah, So so that means that marathon running was bad.
Speaker 3 (39:59):
No, it's not that it's bad. It's just like not
fulfilling as I don't know, getting stable in life, getting
a good job, getting degrees, having like things that you love.
I don't know. I just feel like at this point
I could kind of like pass away and like I
don't know, don't make a statue out of me for
being mediocre at best.
Speaker 2 (40:18):
Hmmm, Well, what's your wife think about life? Your life together?
What's what's her Uh? Does she have similar Uh?
Speaker 3 (40:31):
She's like as a she's like as accomplished and whatnot.
So like, you know, that's all good and dandy, but
she's kind of happy, just like playing the last stage
over and over again, whereas I'm like, this game's the
game's this game's bonk bro, like we're the new Mechanics.
Speaker 2 (40:46):
Yeah, I guess. How do you reinvent your life? That's
a very interesting question. How old did you say you
were I'm thirty one. Brother, that's cool. Well, you said
you wanted to play guitar, but then you gave that
you didn't want to. What about traveling? Do you want
to go anywhere?
Speaker 1 (41:06):
Dude?
Speaker 3 (41:06):
I want to travel, but I feel like if I travel,
like things are just kind of you know, like when
you leave your home and then you go somewhere else
for a long time and you come back and home
doesn't feel like home. I'm afraid of that.
Speaker 2 (41:21):
What do you mean by home doesn't feel like home?
Speaker 3 (41:27):
Okay? You know when you go somewhere and like you
experience a bunch of stuff and you're like, oh, I
want to experience this all the time, and then you
know it's like kind of fake because you're gonna come
back and then you're sleeping in your bed that you
slept in before you left, and you're just like this,
this isn't it man.
Speaker 2 (41:44):
You're you are thinking that you're saying that you might
like where you go more than you like your home,
and then the world will feel like your home instead
of your home feeling like your home.
Speaker 3 (41:53):
I think it's the inverse of that, where I like
leave and it shakes up like my fucking rhythm. And
then I go back and then I'm like, all my
rhythms all out of whack. This doesn't feel like it's
how it should be. But then after a minute, it
just kind of feels like how it should be.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
Aren't you Aren't you somewhat expressing a desire to have
your rhythm shook? Isn't that kind of what you're talking about?
Speaker 8 (42:13):
This?
Speaker 3 (42:14):
That's the whole thing, dude, No way, I'm autistic. I
like my rhythms, like you know, I keep my melody
at a at a steady taste.
Speaker 2 (42:22):
Okay, all right, So so so you're good.
Speaker 3 (42:28):
Now I'm chilling, dude, Like I'm chilling, and that's like,
what's worrying me? I feel like I shouldn't be chilling.
Speaker 2 (42:36):
That's it. Uh well, you know, I'm like, here's the thing.
It's funny because there's a like desire is so uh
like paradoxical in many ways because the I really do,
I really do believe in that whole like desire is
suffering thing. But then it's like, when you don't have desire,
(42:59):
you start to desire desire, right, which is what you're
kind of which is what I'm getting from you. Is
that you desire desire, which in and but it's a paradox. Honestly,
that's a desire you then possess what you want.
Speaker 3 (43:15):
That's kind of crazy because I always tell people like, dude, like,
imagine when you were a kid and like you you
figured out like how to spell and like how to
color within the lines, like that shit was fucking amazing,
Like it was you felt accomplished. And now it's you're
just like, oh, I got to work on time. Oh yeah,
I fucking I fucking hate everything else. I don't know, dude,
(43:35):
It's it's crazy, and it's not like I like I'm
craving the struggle. I grew up and I grew up struggling,
like I was a very poor trial, Like I couldn't
really speak until I was, you know, twelve, a lot
of speech therapy and shit, so like the struggle is real.
It's just, uh, I don't know. I think everybody should struggle,
Like all.
Speaker 2 (43:54):
The time you said you think you think everyone should struggle.
Speaker 3 (43:59):
I think everyone should struggle, like all the time. I
think like getting above and out of struggling is is
the true accomplishment of life, Like you're always fighting if that.
Speaker 2 (44:10):
Means I want.
Speaker 3 (44:11):
Yeah, like, right now, I'm like level ninety nine and
I'm just I'm just killing shit.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
Yeah, well, uh, why don't you help other people who
you feel like are struggling?
Speaker 3 (44:26):
Okay, so I thought about doing that, ironically enough, I
like wanted to be a social worker when I was,
you know, going to school, and I realized I don't
like people. I like smoking weed, playing video games, and like,
you know, I don't know, figuring shit out, and I
don't know. I guess I'm just still trying to figure
the shit out. Brother.
Speaker 2 (44:45):
Yeah uh yeah, by the way, not liking people understood, understandable,
stood shit. I yeah, dude, uh uh, you're good. Just
play video games and then and then die respectably.
Speaker 3 (45:02):
That's okay, hundred truly, while I'm dying, I'll think of
this conversation. And but before we get off the phone.
Speaker 2 (45:10):
I want to just hold out before you say what
you got to say. I hope that in the next
I hope, first of all, you're thirty one. I hope
you live. I hope you live at least forty more years.
And I hope that forty years from now, forty fifty,
I'll give you fifty. I hope you live at least
fifty more years, and I hope fifty years from now
(45:32):
that so many other things have happened in your life
that are much more exciting than this conversation, such that
you you don't you're not thinking about it when you die.
Speaker 3 (45:43):
What when else in my life? I'm going to talk
to a freaking get go man like I do.
Speaker 2 (45:48):
I don't know, but there might have. There might be
other things in your life that also happened that aren't
just this.
Speaker 3 (45:55):
Nah do not, dude. I've you for years now, I've
like maybe tried to call her text in twice. And
also I'm so confused why people say you sound different
on the phone. You sound exactly the same, Like you
sound exactly the same. It's ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (46:10):
I interrupted you as you were going to say something.
Speaker 3 (46:14):
Oh no, I was just gonna say, like, you know,
to to you and the audience before you. You booted
me off the lines of someone else who's more interesting
can come and start talking, like, keep doing whatever the
hell you want to do unless you're hurting somebody yourself,
and then stop doing that immediately. That's it.
Speaker 2 (46:33):
What's your name again? Carter?
Speaker 3 (46:35):
Brother?
Speaker 2 (46:35):
Carter, Carter I remembered it. Carter. Carter, I'm really happy
for you. I mean that I'm happy for you. I hope, uh,
keep keep doing. I'm gonna try to borrow some of
your energy.
Speaker 3 (46:47):
One one last question. If you're playing Rivals of Ether,
who you playing?
Speaker 2 (46:50):
Dude, I know what it is. I'm not. I don't.
I couldn't. I can't name a single character. I only
really play Melee.
Speaker 3 (46:57):
Okay, okay, that's fair enough. I figured since you were
a Melee head, you would have at least been, like,
you know, maybe in the in the realm of Ether.
Speaker 2 (47:04):
I like the lion guy. I'll say that, I like
the lion. I know there's a guy I like him.
Take care of Carter.
Speaker 3 (47:13):
See your brother.
Speaker 2 (47:16):
New game plus? Is that the key? I guess that's
the key? The key he's I was. I wish, you know,
I wish I would have actually talked to him more
about that idea that he said that everyone should be
struggling all the time, because I don't. I don't know. Uh,
(47:38):
I don't know if I think that's true or not.
I have no idea. I'm not. I'm not God. I
wish I was. I actually I don't. I don't wish
I was God. That's way too much. That's too much
to be God. I'm perfectly okay. I think being mortal
(48:00):
is a good gig. You get eighty if you're lucky,
you get eighty years. If you're not, you get twelve.
And you could put whatever you get what you get,
and then then you die and then you're done. That's it.
You work over if you're a mortal, if you're God,
Oh it sounds, Oh my god, nothing sounds more exhausting
(48:24):
than being God and being a mortal. I'd rather I'd
rather go right now than than live forever. That's too
that's too much. Still so lonely. I think dying would
suck more if not everyone did it. Like it like
if you like if if you're listening to this and
you're afraid of death, it's if you if you were
(48:44):
the only one where that had happened to that would
be really, that'd be really, that'd be horrifyingly sad if
you were the only one. But you're not. That's your
part of a bunch of stuff, and so so it's
not it's not good to be I don't know. I
haven't been talking for too long. I'm gonna end this.
Speaker 5 (49:05):
Hello, can you hear me?
Speaker 2 (49:08):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (49:08):
Hi?
Speaker 2 (49:09):
What is your name?
Speaker 5 (49:11):
Elena?
Speaker 2 (49:12):
Elena? What's up? Elena? How you doing? Dude?
Speaker 5 (49:17):
Nothing much, very chill today. I you know, opt on
your stream because I thought you were streaming.
Speaker 2 (49:24):
Where are you? Sound like you're in a public place
of some kind.
Speaker 5 (49:28):
Oh no, I am so sorry. I am in my
living room.
Speaker 2 (49:32):
Very cool, very nice. Well Elena, what do you want
to talk about today?
Speaker 5 (49:38):
Well? Actually I went to go see you in Pittsburgh
and I was like, like I kind of had a
little bit of a self realization based off of when
your uh, your guys is prompts.
Speaker 2 (49:56):
One of our prompts.
Speaker 5 (49:58):
Yeah. On the guy was talking about how, you know,
his life was perfect, and it was kind of like,
you know, yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
Can I can? I can I give the listeners some
context to what you're what you're about to talk about?
Speaker 5 (50:14):
Course.
Speaker 2 (50:15):
So I did a show in in Pittsburgh at the
Bottle Rocket Comedy Club shout out the Battle Rocket Comedy Club.
That place rocks, and this guy came on stage and
he talked about how he's He basically was saying that
he's like an alcoholic, but that his life is pretty great,
(50:36):
and so he has no incentive to change. Would you
say that's accurate?
Speaker 5 (50:42):
Yeah, that sounds about right.
Speaker 2 (50:44):
Yeah, he was based. That's basically what he was saying.
So tell me, tell me more about your experience. Uh,
listening to him talk, yeah, so I was.
Speaker 5 (50:56):
Like, damn, like I feel the I feel this way,
like I only have one hinderance in my life, and
besides that, I feel absolutely wonderful.
Speaker 2 (51:09):
Yeah, I didn't have good Uh. I was kind of
amazed by that guy too. I was thinking about his
situation because you know, he's he was definitely coming off
like he was more satisfied with his life than I
am with mine, and I didn't know, uh, and so
(51:31):
I really questioned it. I was really thinking about it.
I actually was thinking about that guy a lot as
while I was on stage with him and a little
bit after, because I was like, is if your life
is truly But that's the question, is there are you?
Is he Do you think he was maybe lying to
himself or maybe there was something we didn't know. I
don't know, but you know what if I don't actually
want to talk about that guy because he's not here
(51:53):
and you are, So tell me about your situation.
Speaker 4 (51:56):
Right.
Speaker 5 (51:56):
So I'm currently in school and I work a part
time job. But like, I have one problem in my life,
and that's that I have chronic pain.
Speaker 2 (52:15):
But your life is good other than that.
Speaker 5 (52:18):
Yeah, I mean i'd say, like the problem with it though,
is you know, it definitely is a mental toll. And
so I guess that's what I wanted to talk to
you about today, because like, you know, it feels great otherwise,
but you know, brings it puts you down sometimes.
Speaker 2 (52:38):
I do have to say, I think having chronic pain
is different from alcoholism because the chronic pain. Yeah, that
would say, that's a lot, that's a lot. Yeah, because
that guy was like, I drink seven beers a day
and my life is perfect, so I'm never gonna stop.
I think it's a little bit different from enjoy finding
way of finding how to uh really enjoy life despite
(53:02):
chronic pain. So I don't actually think those are remotely
comparable situations. But I'm I'm impressed. I'm impressed. I'm impressed
by it. Yeah, tell me more.
Speaker 5 (53:14):
Yeah, So, I've had a chronic pains for about the
past six years, and like you know, it's getting to
the point where I'm I'm a little snappy, and I
feel terrible, And just to like preface, I I did
sign up to go to actual therapy, so but I
(53:36):
thought i'd call and get your opinion on.
Speaker 2 (53:38):
It, my opinion on what exactly?
Speaker 5 (53:43):
Onke? How how do you think you would manage something
like this where you know it kind of hinders daily
life and just how to stay mentally well with it,
you know?
Speaker 2 (53:59):
But yeah, I used so sorry. I really wouldn't. I
really wouldn't. I was I was talking h on the
last podcast. I was talking about that guy Kendrick Norton Junior,
who got his arm cut off like five years ago
in a car accident. I don't know if you listened
to that, but that guy got his car cut off
(54:21):
in a car accident. And I was like looking at
his Instagram recently and he was like smiling and enjoying life.
And I don't have any advice. I have nothing for you,
because if that happened to me, I would just uh,
I would feel desolate. Right, Sorry, that's sorry. I don't know.
(54:44):
How do you deal with chronic physic I don't know, dude.
I had a cold last week and I almost fucking
had to kill myself. I mean, what kind of pain
do you have?
Speaker 5 (54:57):
So it's abdominal pain, and it's just like kind of
like a nice snapping you over and over again.
Speaker 2 (55:04):
Mm hm mm hmmm. Uh. I mean, well, I don't
know why you want my opinion on it, because you're
you open to this call by saying that you're doing
great and enjoying life. So I mean, I want your
opinion on it. Well, how do you do it?
Speaker 5 (55:22):
I mean, I'm I'm pretty thankful for the things I have,
so like, yeah, life is life is great. But then
I feel so bad because I take, I take it's
it's more frustrating than anything to have the paint. So
I feel bad because like I get moody and snappy,
(55:43):
and my boyfriend has to deal with it and my friends,
so it's it's, you know, it's hard because I'm a
little bit of a I get moody, I guess so.
Speaker 2 (56:03):
But so other than that, I mean, you're doing I
mean you have friends and you have a boyfriend and
you're you're you're you're chilling withstanding it. Yeah that's pretty good. Uh,
I'm I'm impressed. I'm impressed by that. Now, if I
have a little I have a little pimple, on my nose,
and I'm about ready to just cut the whole fucking
(56:24):
thing off. So uh, yeah, I have. I have a
little pimple on my nose, and it's ruined my entire life.
I have like I have like big i have like
life plans that I want to get to and I'm like,
I'm waiting until the pimple on my nose is gone
for me. That's how much of a of a pussy
I am when it comes to like dealing with any
(56:45):
kind of pain or discomfort or sickness. So I applaud
you on this.
Speaker 5 (56:51):
I appreciate that. Yeah, no, because, like I think, one
of the biggest factors to mental problems is actually another
thing from your show is the one guy was talking
about having a Oh my gosh, what's what's the male
opposite of a shysterectomy?
Speaker 2 (57:14):
And and does scopy and and no no.
Speaker 6 (57:16):
No, all that like.
Speaker 5 (57:20):
No, no, the yeah vasectomy ohect me.
Speaker 2 (57:27):
Oh yes, okay. So also at that Pittsburgh show, somebody
came on stage to talk about having a vasectomy. Yes, yes, yes, yeah.
Speaker 5 (57:35):
And so you know, I'm currently in college and I've
gone to all these doctors since I had the problems,
and I was like, dude, if it's because it stems
from my uterus? And so I said, if you have
to take this out, because what I have is chronic,
If you have to take this out, I am one
hundred percent willing. And unlike male doctors, they say, oh no,
(58:00):
like you can't really do anything, like you're too young,
you might change your mind, stuff like that.
Speaker 2 (58:11):
So wait, so male doctors are more likely to take
out the uterus than the female doctors. No, like.
Speaker 5 (58:20):
The women are less likely to be able to have
a permanent change to their like reproductive organs than males.
Like males are more likely to get the yes women,
it's like, no, you your husband might want kids. Stuff
like that.
Speaker 2 (58:39):
Is so art. Have you tried to get your uterus removed?
Speaker 5 (58:44):
Yes? I haven't. They've all told me and no, you're
too young, you're too young.
Speaker 2 (58:48):
How old are you?
Speaker 5 (58:50):
I am nineteen?
Speaker 2 (58:53):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (58:54):
I mean?
Speaker 2 (58:55):
Is did the doctors tell you that if you got
it removed, we get rid of the pain.
Speaker 5 (59:02):
They said that it could help. And at this point
I'm like, I will do anything.
Speaker 2 (59:10):
Well, she that's cool. Do do go do do go
see a doctor and whatever the doctor says, that's probably cool.
Right do you take like do you take like meds
(59:32):
for it? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (59:34):
I do.
Speaker 5 (59:36):
The problem with that is, like I am very against
because I understand opioid Egyptian. So it's not like the
stuff they give me isn't very strong and it doesn't
really help.
Speaker 2 (59:48):
Mm hm m hmm. Well you can. I mean, uh, well,
this is good, this is uh again. I'm impressed that
you're able to withstand any any pain of any kind.
And unlike the guy who came on stage at the
Pittsburgh show, you don't have to drink seven beers to
(01:00:09):
do it, so you know, good on, good on you,
good on you. What's your what's your name again?
Speaker 5 (01:00:16):
Elena?
Speaker 2 (01:00:18):
Elena? Well, Alena, is there anything else that you want
to say to the people of the computer or anything
at all before we go?
Speaker 5 (01:00:28):
If the dear guy from Pittsburgh is watching, he did
a great job.
Speaker 2 (01:00:32):
He did do a great job. He did do a
great job. Well, thank you very much for calling, Lena.
Speaker 5 (01:00:39):
Yes, thank you for answering.
Speaker 2 (01:00:41):
Have a good one you too. If it'll, honestly, dude,
if it'll stop this, if it'll get rid of this
pimple on my nose, I'll I will also get rid
of my uterus. I don't know if anyone knows a
doctor that can that will be willing to let me,
that will be willing to remove my uterists to stop
(01:01:03):
my nose pimple. By the way, for reference the deer
guy that she was referring to, I'll tell this story.
There was a guy in the comments section of my
YouTube channel shout out my boy Leon. This guy comments
on one of my YouTube videos and he goes he
says something like, hey man, I started doing stand up
(01:01:25):
comedy very recently, and I wanted and I started doing
this bit where I dress up like a deer and
I tell deer jokes. And I saw you coming to Pittsburgh,
and I was wondering if I could open for you.
And I didn't look at any of his YouTube videos beforehand.
I was just like, I was like zero vetting. I responded,
(01:01:51):
and I was like, absolutely, of course, of course, random
person from my YouTube comments, you can absolutely open for
my show in Pittsburgh. And he came and uh, he
did this show and he was at He was actually
really fucking good. He was really fucking good. He honestly,
(01:02:12):
I'm not saying this like I really mean this. I
think he did better than I did. I genuinely like
like when just crowd reaction, he did better than I did.
So we are we are one for one on putting
our faith in in people from the YouTube comments, uh so,
(01:02:36):
shout out Leon, shout out the deer guy.
Speaker 7 (01:02:38):
Hello, folks, it's Lyle here. That's the end of this episode.
But get this, I'm releasing a bonus episode this week.
That's right, an entire extra hour of the podcast that
you can listen to by becoming a premium member of
Therapy Gecko over at therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com.
(01:03:00):
Supercast subscribers get access to bonus episodes. They get a
completely add free podcast feed of the regular show, they
get recordings from my live shows, members only streams, and
they help support my ability to continue doing this podcast.
So here's a clip from this week's members only bonus episode.
So you went to art school for two years and
(01:03:21):
then you had to leave.
Speaker 2 (01:03:24):
Why do you have to leave?
Speaker 3 (01:03:26):
I mean, the main reason I'm gonna be boring with
you in money.
Speaker 1 (01:03:29):
Holy shit.
Speaker 2 (01:03:31):
Yeah, that's great. That's by the by the way, by
the way, by the way, a great reason to leave
art school no shade on the arts, but a little
shade on art school, because like, look, man, if you
want to be an artist, you can learn how to
be a great artist to just on the fucking internet.
You know, you don't need to give some fucking douchebag
two hundred thousand dollars anyway. I mean, you're you're, you
(01:03:52):
are done with that?
Speaker 4 (01:03:53):
Now?
Speaker 8 (01:03:53):
Do you?
Speaker 2 (01:03:53):
Are you in any debt?
Speaker 3 (01:03:56):
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah yeah?
Speaker 8 (01:03:59):
How much?
Speaker 5 (01:04:00):
It's not great?
Speaker 1 (01:04:05):
What is it? I want to say?
Speaker 3 (01:04:07):
At least twenty to thirty thousand?
Speaker 2 (01:04:10):
Oh okay, all right, yeah, I've I've heard, I've heard
worst numbers. If you want to hear this full conversation,
you can sign up to become a premium member at
therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com, or find the link
in the episode description that's therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com.
(01:04:32):
All right, I have nothing else to say. Therapy goes
on the line, taking your phone calls.
Speaker 8 (01:04:39):
Every nine, goes to teachings in the line.
Speaker 2 (01:04:45):
He's not an expert.
Hey, how's it going.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
Hey, what's up? How you doing?
Speaker 1 (00:03):
I'm doing great.
Speaker 3 (00:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
Everyone says this, but I can't believe we're actually talking.
Called it like sixty times.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
I'm excited, So I'm excited to talk to you too.
What's your name, Doug.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
I'm Nico, Nico.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Yeah, like Nico Belick.
Speaker 4 (00:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Yeah, let's go bowling, man, let's go bowling. Well, Nico,
what's up?
Speaker 4 (00:29):
Man?
Speaker 2 (00:30):
Would you want to talk about today on the Gecko podcast?
Speaker 5 (00:33):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Well, I I kind of wanted to, so I've been
thinking about this for a while, Like I called in.
I wanted to pay you a compliment. I know it's
been kind of an emotional stream for you earlier today
you had the other call, but like, oh sure, I
just find you so like wise and empathetic, and I
love the way that you help people through their problems
(00:54):
without any judgment. It's it's just super cool and super chill.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Uh yeah, man, but I don't want to make it
you know too. Uh crazy, I'm calling you from Portugal. Yeah,
I'm here visiting. Uh. I've been here with my girlfriend
for about a month and they're really really fallen in
love with the place. And one of the coolest things
(01:22):
that I've done since I've been here is I met
a famous alpaca.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
You met a famous like.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
An I page. Yeah, if you've ever seen the movie
Color Out of Space, the new one with Nick Cage,
it's got a couple of alpacas in there, and those
alpacas live in Portugal. And we were looking on, you know, online,
(01:52):
and we found this lady with an alpaca farm and
she's like, yeah, you know, I've done some filming with them,
with like Nick Cage, and she just casually dropped it.
But obviously you can't just casually drop a connection to
Nick Cage. So we asked about it and it was
those out packets. It was pretty rad.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
I'm curious more about Portugal too, So what made you
want to move? What made you come there? A month ago?
Speaker 1 (02:19):
Well, I guess two years ago. My girlfriend and I
were talking and we're like, what would you do if
you had all the money or just you know, the
ability to do anything? And I said, I don't know,
fuck it, let's just like just go to Portugal and
live and work remotely and exist in Europe somewhere. And
(02:42):
because there's a lot of talk about how Portugal is
very welcoming with their immigration programs and stuff like this,
and then we kind of looked at each other after
I said it, We're like, why aren't we doing that?
So we took a visit out here last year and
really fell in love with with the place, and so
(03:03):
decided this year, let's let's stay here for like a
month and make sure that it's a realistic thing, like
to live in another country that you don't speak the language,
really and it's just been awesome. Man, it's been so
just chill and beautiful, and Portuguese people are so wonderful
(03:24):
and welcoming. Yeah, it's it's been an awesome experience. So
so we're kind of moving forward with that.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
Where are you guys? Are you in Lisbon?
Speaker 1 (03:35):
No, we did visit Lisbon and Lisbon was awesome, But
we're in a town I get as a city actually
about three hours by train north of Lisbon called a Vedro,
and it's a it's it's a place that doesn't have
a Starbucks, So like a Vedro, a the a r.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
I are a Vero Portugal. Oh wow, that looks that
looks very colorful.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
Yeah, it's super like charming and quaint and it's got
like this beautiful old town but with a twenty minute
walk to like a proper city where you can you know,
like do city things and eat rabin and go to
the Indian Spices store and stuff like this. I mean,
(04:27):
they have they have everything. It's it's wonderful.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
Yeah. So I'm I'm actually very interested to talk to
you because I'm obsessed with the idea of like moving
to a foreign country and like seeing what's up and
you know, all that kind of stuff. And I'm always
like googling around for places to go and ideas and stuff,
and a Portugal keeps coming up as like an affordable
(04:52):
expat location.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
Yeah. Yeah, it's been great as far as affordability. I
mean it's you know, it's expensive to eat out every night.
I'm sure you know. I've been talking about going to
airbnbs and stuff. It's it's not cheap, but we we've
been cooking a little bit. Groceries are you know, reasonably priced.
(05:15):
There's not a huge tipping culture, which is nice because
I feel like, you know, you go out and the
person that is waiting on you is like getting paid properly,
and there's not a pressure to be like, oh shit,
I got to pay an extra twenty percent on top
of it.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
M hm.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
So it's it's nice from that aspect too.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
You know, what do you what do you guys do?
Speaker 3 (05:38):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (05:38):
So I work for a software company and I do
like a little bit of consulting on the side. And
my girlfriend, she's currently she's a medical assistant, but she's
going to school for esthetician like skincare. So the plan is, right, well,
(05:59):
we'll open up, she'll open a business here once we
get here, and wow, and I'll continue to work remotely.
And yeah, holy shit.
Speaker 2 (06:08):
So you're so your girlfriend was So your girlfriend's a
medical how does she work from home? If she's a
medical assistant? I would assume she had to be like
at a hospital or something.
Speaker 1 (06:17):
Well, she doesn't work from home. She works in a
clinic in Portugal. No no, no, no, no, back home,
back home. I live Atlanta's home for me for us.
So she works in a clinic there, and uh, she's
right here. She's really excited.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
Hi, get go, oh Hi, what's your what's your what's
your name?
Speaker 5 (06:40):
Hi?
Speaker 6 (06:41):
My name is Emi Lee.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
Hey, what's up Emily?
Speaker 5 (06:46):
Everything is good.
Speaker 6 (06:47):
I'm so excited that we were able to talk to you.
We've been listening to your podcast for a while and
every time we're like, oh my gosh, we should call.
And it's so exciting to be talking to you.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Oh, it's exciting to be talking to you too. I
guess I'll ask you all the questions I was curious about.
So you're you're you work at a clinic in and Okay,
so you guys are both in your you're calling currently
from every year rold Portugal, but you work as a
as a medical assistant in Atlantas or are you like
(07:19):
kind of taking a little sabbatical.
Speaker 6 (07:22):
So yeah, so we we don't live in the city city.
We leave in Canton. I mean it's for you, five
minutes up north of Atlanta. But you know, if I
say Canton is kind of like, so we say Atlanta
and yeah, I work in a clinic and it's a
(07:44):
Navy clinic. So basically we give infusion of vitamins and
stuff like that, two people. And it's been a new job.
Been very excited to learn new stuff.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Very cool, very cool. And so you're gonna play you're
gonna open a what what kind of business are you
gonna open in? In Portugal?
Speaker 6 (08:02):
So the plan is to do an institusian program in
the United States and be able to bring that knowledge
to Portugal. So that will open the door to have
my own business doing facials and taking care of people's skin.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Man, you guys are fing awesome. That's so cool. How
did you? How did you? How did you? How did
you two meet?
Speaker 6 (08:27):
So it's a very cute story. So I was working
in a paintball field, working in a sorry.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
You said, a paintball field.
Speaker 6 (08:37):
I have paintball where they should have paint Yeah. Yeah,
so we I was working there for a for a
while and I started getting along with Nichol's parents, her mom,
his mom. It's very cool. So we are friends and
then I ended up a relationship and one day Nicola
(08:59):
asked me if I want to go out for treatma,
But then that didn't happen. So we went out for
New Year's Year and he cooked a traditional meal from
my country, which was very lovely, and we haven't separated.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Sinton, that's so nice. Where are you originally from?
Speaker 6 (09:19):
I'm from Ecuador, Ecuador.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Very cool, very nice. What what was I going to say?
What was the meal that he cooked from Ecuador?
Speaker 6 (09:29):
It's called that meal. It's a pork and it's the
way that it's roasted as well, and then it's life.
And the way that we that at home is with
like a sandwich form with a different type of bread
and then we put something that is called gurguillo and
basically onions, tomatoes, lemon and that on top with a
(09:51):
spicy sauce and it's delicious.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
How how long you guys been together for.
Speaker 6 (09:57):
This genre is going to be three years?
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Very nice, very cool. Wow, paintball, paintball led to love.
That's cool.
Speaker 6 (10:09):
I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (10:12):
That's very good man. I'm excited for you. Do you
guys know anyone in uh in Avieria? Did you meet
any crazy people? You got any like Kramer esque neighbors
barging into your house?
Speaker 6 (10:27):
No, but everybody's very nice. We actually, in every place
activity that we've been going, we tried to talk to
people and see like what they do, how they got here,
even my tourists, and it's been very nice to hear
from them, and then we keep in contact. Actually, the
last time that we came, we did a cooking glass
(10:49):
and we got along with some other tourists and we
still talk to them.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
Cool man. Very cool. Are there any other, well, anything
else that you have planned for for Portuguese life for
the future, like any things you want to do or
like other places you want to travel or any of
that kind of shit.
Speaker 6 (11:08):
Actually, yeah, Like Portugal is such an amazing little country
because he has so many things to explore, like the
south it's so much forest and then you know, the
bitches are so so nice, and you know, there are
so many things that you can explore. And yeah, we're
just no thinking about that yet because we've been like,
(11:32):
you're not going to place to place to place and
I don't know it. But yeah, definitely explore more the
country and you know the other countries aults in Europe.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
That's cool. How old are you guys? If you don't
want me asking, I'm curious what stage you're at in
life that you're doing this.
Speaker 6 (11:48):
Son MIIKOI is thirty nine. He's going to be very
nine next week actually, and I'm twenty eight.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
Cool fucking cool man. That rocks. That rocks.
Speaker 7 (11:57):
Yes, man.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
Are you guys gonna have a kid?
Speaker 6 (12:00):
M So we are planning on not having kids when
we met, We talk about it and we are very
definitely perspectives of having a kid. You know, it's not
just the apparent, it's so much that comes with it.
And I don't know, I don't think we're ready for
(12:20):
that faith on our lives yet or at all.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
Interesting.
Speaker 6 (12:27):
Interesting what he's saying, nothing can change, things can change. Okay,
he's going to talk to you about this because it's
doing kind of like a long talk, so he's going
to tast you his perspective.
Speaker 5 (12:42):
Cool.
Speaker 4 (12:46):
Yeah, yeah, I mean it's it's a lot of kids, right,
It's a big decision to make, and then you know,
it's a scary world, I feel like.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
So it's it's hard. It's hard to know where you're
going to be at that time. My my sister's got kids.
They're they're young, uh, and they're they're wonderful, they're beautiful kids.
Speaker 4 (13:13):
But like they're a lot.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
Man, Yeah, dude, and it takes so much.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
Of yourself, yeah, to be a parent. So it's hard
to know. I think if you're if you're really ready
for that, right. So yeah, so it's it's it's unclear,
leaning towards no, but you know this is a possibility.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Well, it takes for telling me about your life. One
of the reasons I like doing this part. I really
mean this. I'm trying to figure out what I'm going
to do, how I'm like, what I want to do
with my life, and so I like asking people invasive
questions about what they're going to do with theirs. I'm
just check, I'm just curious. I'm just like, because you
there's no roadmap to how to do anything ever, so
(13:57):
the only thing you can really do is like listen
into how other people are navigating their lives and listen
to your own brain and kind of you know, take
in that. It's cool. I love it. I love what
you guys are doing. I think it's so fucking cool
to just uh, you know, get together with your partner
and go to a go to a new place and
(14:20):
try to you know, continue continue to expand and grow
your fucking brain and life. I think that's really cool.
Speaker 1 (14:31):
Yeah, I mean it's all about, you know, finding new
life experiences and finding a community and contributing to it. Yeah.
I'm becoming part of something, you know.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
So what's your name, Chris Nico? All right, Well this
kind of is basically the same thing.
Speaker 6 (14:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Well, well Nico, thanks for thanks for chatting with me. Man,
did you do you feel like, you guys got what
you wanted out this phone call.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
I yeah, absolutely, I just I just wanted to be
on the phone because you, like she said, you got
me listening to you all the time. So it's just
cool to be a part of this community and this
experience in another way. So thank you taking our call.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
You guys have a good one. Man, you guys take care.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Thanks then you girls.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Please, Oh man, this those two have such a nice,
beautiful life. That's so great. You know, I really meant
that this. I Uh, I ask invasive questions about things
because well, one of the reasons I think people listen
to this podcast is too uh for the reason I
(15:44):
was just describing is to like getting it. It's a
little you can kind of you kind of only have
your own brain and your own lived experience, and it's
kind of nice to listen to what's going on in
other people's brains and lives because it can help inform
your own a little bit. Uh. I'd like to do
that some someday. Go to like a well, I went
(16:04):
to Portugal, I went to Lisbon. I did a show
there a year ago. But like, uh, going to some
random place to do a weird thing I don't know
why I'm phrasing it like that, but uh yeah, shout
out to those people. They were cool. I was about
to say, I'm sorry I forgot that guy's name, but
I'm kind of not because like if you quiz like
(16:27):
if you win, ahay. Here's my thing about names with
and I've said this eight thousand times. What I'm gonna
say it again. If you were to like quiz me
on like that guy's life or like that couple's life,
if you were to like write down a list of
if you were like quiz me on like specific things
that maybe they said about themselves, I'd get at least
(16:48):
fifty percent on that ques I don't remember what the
guy said he did for a living, I would actually
probably get a forty percent. Here's the thing. I remember
the vibe of the conversation that I just had, whether
or not. I remember that I liked those two. I
remembered that I was inspired by them. I remember that
(17:12):
I enjoyed talking to them, and I remember the general
sentiment and vibe that they get off gave off. Even
if I don't remember a name, uh but I do.
His name was Nico, and I think her name was
Emily or maybe it was Chris. I don't know. I
(17:33):
don't know.
Speaker 8 (17:34):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
Hello, Hello, Hi, What is your name? Walker Walker, Texas Ranger?
What's up?
Speaker 6 (17:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 8 (17:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (17:47):
Not much?
Speaker 8 (17:47):
Wait? Is this Lyle?
Speaker 2 (17:49):
This is Lyle? This is me?
Speaker 8 (17:51):
Hi?
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Hello? What is who are you? You're a Walker?
Speaker 8 (17:54):
I'm Walker, but I'm dressed as Bob Belcher mom and
my Halloween costume right now?
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Oh you do have what are your hellen plans?
Speaker 3 (18:01):
Uh?
Speaker 5 (18:02):
Not much.
Speaker 8 (18:03):
Me and my girlfriend we don't. We don't like party,
but we're going to like hand out candy to kids.
It's gonna be great.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
That's nice. That's a sweet. Do people still trick or treat?
Or is it has? Has the world just gotten too
crazy for that?
Speaker 8 (18:20):
I don't we were talking about that. I don't think
people trick or treat any more because of COVID. I
think it's all like trunk or treat?
Speaker 2 (18:26):
Now, where are you going to hand out candidate kids?
Speaker 5 (18:31):
We live in.
Speaker 8 (18:31):
Vermont, so it's like a little small town called Bristol.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
That's cool? Is it?
Speaker 3 (18:36):
Like?
Speaker 2 (18:36):
Uh? I mean I grew up in the suburbs and
there were like all these cul de sacs and it
was you know, Uh do you are. What's the like landscape?
Are you like in a little town? Is it a suburb?
Speaker 8 (18:49):
Yeah, it's it's like a little mountain town. But we
live on a flower farm right now.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
You live on a flower farm.
Speaker 8 (18:58):
I live on a flower farm. I work on the farm.
Or season's almost over. But yeah, yeah, it's like this
really dope house. We actually have to move in like
a few weeks, so I'm actually we're really upset about it,
but it'll be good in the long runs.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
Wait, tell me more about your life. You live on
a flower farm in Vermont. Who are you? How did you?
How did you become that?
Speaker 8 (19:26):
I'm I'm the Texas Ranger. No, I'm just I grew
up in South Carolina and I decided I wanted to
be a sea instructor. So like three years ago, I
moved out to Vermont and best decision I ever made.
So now I spend my life doing seasonal work. I've
(19:46):
been doing it.
Speaker 5 (19:47):
For like three years. Sorry, I just got a.
Speaker 8 (19:52):
Little nervous because I just realized some on the phone
with you. But but yeah, no, I've been doing seasonal
work for like three years. So I ski instruct in
the winter and I've been kind of like bouncing around
from different jobs for like summer and spring and stuff.
Speaker 2 (20:10):
Cool. What's a flower house? Like, you guys make flowers
in the house.
Speaker 8 (20:18):
No, we like so we like grow the flowers, so
we like work on the farm. But the house is
just like on the property. So when he hired me,
he was like, do you want to live on the property?
And I was like, hell yeah. And it's it's a
really cool howthing. It has curved walls. We call it
like the boat or the beehive.
Speaker 2 (20:40):
It has curved walls.
Speaker 8 (20:42):
As curved walls, it looks like it looks like a beehive.
Speaker 5 (20:46):
It does look like a beehive.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
That's cool.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
Man.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
How long you've been living there?
Speaker 8 (20:51):
Not long, like seven months?
Speaker 2 (20:53):
And where are you gonna go?
Speaker 8 (20:57):
We're moving down to like southern Vermonts to teach ski
So I teach skiing at this resort called Mount Snow
and shout out Mount Snow. But yeah, so I've been
teaching there for the last few years, so I want
to move back down to go teach there. But I'm
super bummed to leave the house. That's actually why I
was trying to call you. It was like to debate
(21:19):
if I should move or not?
Speaker 2 (21:23):
Well, why yeah, why are you moving?
Speaker 8 (21:25):
Well, mainly just to ski instruct because it's like it's
my favorite thing ever. It's like I'm so passionate about it.
It's like someone who grew up in South Carolina. It
was like always like a fun thing. My parents like
would take me for spring break and stuff, and I
just like fell in love with it. So I was
always like, I want to ski instructure when I grow up, and.
Speaker 5 (21:49):
I've just stuck with it.
Speaker 8 (21:50):
I really love it. So I knew if I didn't
do it, I'd be like super depressed this winter.
Speaker 2 (21:57):
And so you're moving to go do it?
Speaker 8 (22:00):
Yeah, yeah, so we got.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Yeah that sounds you I don't have you don't it
sounds like a great idea. Yeah, I just talk.
Speaker 3 (22:09):
Yeah, I get.
Speaker 8 (22:09):
I'm so excited about It's just like you know how
like moving is, and it's just it's so stressful. It's like,
so I read a statistic, it's like the most stressful
thing to do in your lifetime. And because young people
move so much, we're like the most just out generation,
which tracks I think.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
That's a fascinating thing. Is really is that the most
stressful thing you do is moving.
Speaker 8 (22:29):
I think someone my best friend told me that, and
she knows so much.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
Okay, so you've got you've got your sources properly cited.
That's good, exactly exactly. I mean, yeah, it's stressful to move.
That's why I lived out of airbnbs for so long.
I didn't want to fucking uh deal with it.
Speaker 8 (22:47):
Yeah, and moving furniture is the worst. We keep moving
into new into furnished places. Everywhere I've lived in the
last like three years been pretty much fully furnished.
Speaker 2 (22:56):
How'd you meet your girlfriends?
Speaker 8 (22:58):
We met at the Mountain Mountain funny enough doesn't ski though.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
Yeah, what what was she doing there if she didn't ski?
Speaker 8 (23:08):
She was so we work in like the ski school,
so she was kind of looking after the little kids
and dealing with the parents, which is probably the worst
job you can have in ski school.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
Right, Yeah? What how long? How long are you living
in southern Vermont for?
Speaker 6 (23:25):
Uh?
Speaker 8 (23:25):
We have a year leaf, which is the first time
I've ever signed a lease longer than eight months.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Cool. You sound like you you're doing good. You sound
like you've you've got a nice uh life. Just from
my where I sit, it looks you you have a
nice life.
Speaker 8 (23:44):
I I like, I like where I am.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
Yeah, do you feel good every day? Do you feel peaceful?
I know?
Speaker 8 (23:53):
You know That's the thing is like I if I had, like,
you know, if I could go back and like tell
younger me where I am, Like they'd be so excited,
you know, Like this is awes. That's like the best
situation I could have ever predicted for myself. You know,
I'm living like cottage Core lesbian dream right now, but
like still I wake up and I'm like, I'm not satisfied.
(24:14):
It's like there's just like more I want to do,
But it's I'm very happy with where I am. But
I have a hard time livingly, like you talk about
it all the time. I have a really hard time
being present and just trying to like live in the
moment like I was at I was listening to you
today at work, and I was just trying to really
like taking like oh, I'm cutting these merrygolds right now
(24:36):
and I'm like smelling them and like trying to take
in every moment. But it's hard.
Speaker 2 (24:41):
It's so hard. What was I said? What was I saying?
What was I saying?
Speaker 8 (24:45):
I don't remember. It was the new one it was
the one you put out yesterday.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
I was reading now, I like, I know I am
saying this to be funny, but it is also true.
I always forget that I have a podcast where I
say stuff.
Speaker 8 (25:00):
Yeah, it is kind of wild. I'm trying to I've
just been trying to start a podcast with my friends,
and I realized talking is just like really hard when
you're not when you have to.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
Yeah, talking is hard. Talking is hard. I'm talking is hard.
I'm thinking about like, uh, I'm thinking about a life.
I think about a version of life that feels really
really really easy, and when I'm thinking about it, it
involves a lot of not talking.
Speaker 8 (25:37):
Like yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:40):
Yeah, or like a lot of like being around large
groups of people that you're like included in but you're
not talking to any of them. That's kind of my dream.
My dream is to constantly be in large rooms of
people that like maybe that like I've organized together and
(26:04):
who are all my friends and that I care about,
and then just not talk to any of them, but
just just be physically present and uh drunk and just
not saying anything to anyone, just looking around and thinking.
(26:28):
But you're still there, You're still with people, You're still
you're socializing when you don't have to say a word.
It sounds like a dream to me.
Speaker 8 (26:36):
That is the dream because like the vibe is already there.
You don't have to like make it in it, right.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
There's nothing. There is an Onion article that's so funny
and it says something like ninety nine percent of conversations
do not need to happen. And it's true.
Speaker 8 (26:56):
It's true most I saw that Onion article.
Speaker 2 (26:59):
Yeah, this knows of the times you don't have to
It is hard to talk. It is hard to talk.
You ever talk? You ever just talked one on one
to one person? It's it's it's genuinely so exhausting.
Speaker 8 (27:13):
Yeah, it's what you do every day though.
Speaker 2 (27:17):
Yeah, I mean it's a little different. It's a little
different because I do it. I'll say that it's well,
it is exhausting, but it's it's a little different because
I do it in the context of recording a podcast.
And I think that that context, Like you ever like
been at a party or something and you found yourself
(27:38):
in a one on one conversation with someone, Yeah, surely
the most exhausting, Like when you're at a party and
you're like standing exact when you're at a party and
you're like standing in a circle of people and you're
not talking but yet. But if you're standing around at
a party and you're in a circle of people and
you're not talking, and you feel a little anxious that
(27:59):
you haven't talked because you're like, oh yeah, maybe I'm like,
you know, you just feel weird about that. That's bad.
But if you're if you can get to a situation
where you're in a group, you're standing at a party
or at a thing, and you're in a group of
people and you're not talking, but you feel comfortable, that's
that's optimal. You know. It's like if you've ever been
at a at a like a whatever and you're just
(28:21):
you one on one, are talking to one person and
you have to keep thinking of things to say, it's
just so exhausting.
Speaker 5 (28:29):
Yeah, we also can't listen.
Speaker 8 (28:31):
I find that I'm like, i feel like I'm like
an entertainer sometimes at party, Like I love.
Speaker 5 (28:36):
To talk to people because it's a lot, it's a lot.
Speaker 8 (28:40):
But like we were just we were just at a
wedding and like, you know, it's like a ton of
fucking people. My social battery has never been so in
my entire life.
Speaker 5 (28:49):
But that was also the.
Speaker 8 (28:51):
Kind of vibe where like, if you don't want to
say anything, you can just sit there and I don't
feel uncomfortable. So it's like, but I feel like you
have to know the people, like these are people I've
been in social situations with for like a while, you know.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
Yeah, yeah, I like it too. I really actually do.
Like sometimes I'm in the mood, you know, it is
exhaust but it is always it depends on my mood.
Sometimes I'm really to talk to people. I throw a
little party at my house a little while ago one time,
(29:25):
and uh, I was just I stood in the corner
and I didn't talk to anyone for not the whole time,
but for just like like five minutes. And it was
the best that I felt because I'd gathered everyone into
one room, but I didn't have to say, I didn't
have to do anything. It was great.
Speaker 8 (29:44):
Yeah, you just provided the stays. That's kind of the
best situation.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
Yeah. Like, like I do my live shows and my
tours and stuff. I'm trying to figure out a way
that I can, like how do I do a show?
But I but not my whole show was about talking
to people. I'm like, how do I do a version
of it where I just don't actually have to say
anything at all? Can like, can I gather a but
(30:09):
can I gather a bunch of people to a theater
and give somehow give them a good experience? But I
but without having to actually do anything.
Speaker 5 (30:19):
Yeah, it's like a riddle.
Speaker 8 (30:21):
I'm trying to think. Yeah, I feel like you could.
I feel like, well, you could just show up to
a place to sit there.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
I'm being I'm being like seventy I'm being like seventy
percent facetious right now. Anyway, anyway, what's your name again?
Walker Walker, Texas Ranger. Well, this was thanks for this
was you know what? This was an easy conversation. This
(30:49):
was this was this felt easy. So thanks for making
this easy.
Speaker 5 (30:55):
That's great.
Speaker 8 (30:56):
That's all I ever wanted was a chill conversation with you.
So thank you so much for kicking out. You took
me completely off guard. I had just walked inside of
my Bob Belcher costume, so I did not expect it.
Speaker 2 (31:09):
Well, enjoy uh, enjoy whatever you're gonna do with with
uh with that Bob Belcher costume.
Speaker 8 (31:19):
Thank you, Thank you so much.
Speaker 7 (31:21):
God, bless you Walker, Thank you bye, GAK, see you later.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
I don't have a Halloween costume. I only have I
have my Gecko costume. But if I went out for
Halloween in my Gecko costume, that'd be really lame. By
the way I do like talking to people.
Speaker 7 (31:41):
I do.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
I don't think I would do what I do if
I didn't.
Speaker 3 (31:45):
But.
Speaker 2 (31:47):
It is undenied. It is sometimes I'm like in such
a I mean, you guys know, everyone knows what it's
like to have different states of energy, and sometimes I,
you know, I really have felt at times in which
I was at the head and there's no energy to
say anything ever to anyone, and then times where I
(32:09):
was like, I'm a genius and I can talk to
anyone who ever, And it kind of oscillates between those
two things. I don't know if it's like a I
don't know if I'm fucking bitepolar or whatever the fuck,
but like, uh, it's just I always just feel like
I always isolate. I feel like I'm always oscillating between like, oh,
(32:30):
I don't ever want to talk to anyone ever again,
and then like, oh, I think I can talk to anyone.
So I don't know it's a weird thing. Hello, Yeah,
what's up?
Speaker 3 (32:41):
Bro?
Speaker 1 (32:41):
Hey?
Speaker 2 (32:42):
What's up? Player? What's your name?
Speaker 3 (32:44):
Carter?
Speaker 7 (32:45):
Carter?
Speaker 2 (32:46):
What's going on? Carter? How's life?
Speaker 3 (32:49):
Honestly? Pretty fucking great? Man? Like, I've kind of done
everything and now I'm just like, what the fuck else.
Speaker 4 (32:56):
Do I do?
Speaker 3 (32:57):
Wow?
Speaker 2 (32:58):
That's I would like, I'm so excited to talk to you.
You've done it? Do you mean for the day or
just in life? You've done it all?
Speaker 3 (33:05):
Dude? Like I feel like I've pretty much done it all.
Like I'm like thirty one, I've gotten my masters, I
had like a good job, I got a got a
wife and three dogs, and I mean I don't want kids.
I play all the video games and smoke all the
weed and like what else is there?
Speaker 4 (33:20):
Now?
Speaker 5 (33:21):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (33:23):
Oh my god, what I don't know what else is there?
I don't know what what? Yeah? That's what do you think?
The answer to that question is, well.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
I mean, I guess the only important thing for me
right now is like playing video games, like I like
fighting games like a shit ton. Yeah I can say
shit right, yeah right, yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:41):
You can say whatever, man, Yeah, well go ahead, can't
keep going.
Speaker 3 (33:49):
No, I'm just saying I like I like play like
a lot of fighting games, and I like, I'm trying
to get mastered Rank and six Fighter Street Fighter six
And I don't know if you you know about Melee.
I don't know if you know about Rivals of Eve.
That's a new Oh okay, well I apologize. Shame on
me for fucking assuming. But yeah no, I'm like, I'm
like just griding those, and after I've hit masters on those,
(34:10):
I'm just like, what the fuck else am I gonna do?
Speaker 2 (34:12):
So let's get back to your existential car. Are you
actually having an existential crisis? You don't sound like you are.
You sound like you're doing it.
Speaker 3 (34:18):
No, dude, Like I feel like I'm doing all right,
But I feel like after like another year of just
I don't know, New Game Plus, I'm gonna start freaking out.
Speaker 2 (34:26):
Man, Yeah, you are kind of on New Game Plus.
I mean, I don't know, I really do. Like my
gut really please don't take anything I ever say seriously,
but my gut is telling me that you could just
play video games and be nice to your wife and
dogs and then die, and you did, you did, you
(34:49):
would get an A plus on your homework. You know,
I don't know life is uh. I'm gonna talk about
something completely unrelated, but still. I went. I was at
meaw Wolf in uh Dallas, shout out to me wolf,
meowolf rocks. And I found this little uh book or
(35:11):
something that was in the exhibit, and it said something like,
how can you ever be doing nothing when you are
always being a being? And I was like, that makes
a lot of sense, you know what I mean? Like
the bare minimum of existence is not particularly hard. You
went above and beyond, you formed the what sounds I mean?
(35:33):
You've told me nothing about the quality of your relationship,
and I've asked you no questions about it, but I
just blanketly assume that it's going well. You have three
dogs who all sound all three of your dogs sound
like they're not dead.
Speaker 3 (35:47):
They're all right under my feet, laying down, kind of chilling.
Speaker 2 (35:50):
So you don't have a kid, then you don't sound
like you want one. You have food and your everyone
everyone has food. Yeah, play video games and play video
games and then die. I guess I don't know what else.
You wouldn't be anything else you did outside of playing
video games and dying would be just a bonus.
Speaker 3 (36:14):
All right, That's that's fair. I'm trying to play guitar,
but I kind of gave up on that because I'm
fucking horrible. I'd rather press buttons.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
Well, tell me more about your the crisis of New
Game Plus?
Speaker 3 (36:26):
All right? So, I mean, I actually don't even know
how old you are. I assume that you're like, what,
late twenties, early thirties.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
I'm dying. I'm about to turn twenty seven.
Speaker 3 (36:35):
Oh god, Well, once you hit thirty, you know, blah
blah blah, it goes downhill. But no, like, dude, you
hit like a certain like you know, threshold where you're
kind of happy doing whatever. I've heard you're on like
previous streams and whatnot. But have you ever felt like
you're on New Game Plus?
Speaker 2 (36:53):
There's a lot I actually don't feel like I'm on
New Game Plus. I feel like, uh, do you want to?
You know how I actually feel? I feel like I'm
I'm I'm in Uh like you ever play you ever
play Zelda? And like maybe you've beaten a couple dungeons
(37:13):
and you're walking around the overworld map trying to find
out what you're supposed to do next to progress the game. Yeah,
and you're just walking around high rule, trying to figure
out what where are you supposed to go? What are
you supposed to do?
Speaker 8 (37:27):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (37:28):
And eventually get frustrated and you look it up on
the internet. That's kind of what my life feels like,
except I can't just look it up on the internet
because it's not linear. So I don't feel like I'm
in New Game Plus. There's a lot that I still desire.
I don't think I feel good enough regularly to consider
myself on New Game Plus. There's aspects of my life
(37:52):
where I'm like, I don't know if continuing further down,
there's aspects of my life where I'm like, I don't
know if approaching this the way that I've been approaching
it uh historically is going to yield different results. But no,
I definitely still uh I, there's there's a lot that
(38:12):
I want for all.
Speaker 3 (38:15):
Right, that's fair. I got another question, if you don't
mind full of them at this point? Yeah, okay, So
if you're not a New Game Plus, is there like
a point where you're like gonna get like a new
expansion pack? Because I kind of feel like I'm I'm
ready for a new XPEC at this point.
Speaker 2 (38:28):
Am I gonna get a new expansion pack. I've I'm
you know, Uh, that's a that's a great question. That's
a great question. I've been thinking about that. I think
about that. I feel a little stuck. But uh, whether
or not you get in the new expansion pack kind
of has to I kind of if I if if
I could, I'd put the game down for like a
fucking second and then come back. That's kind of Yeah,
(38:54):
maybe that's being in a coma. Maybe that's being in
a coma. Maybe that's maybe that's not being in a No,
I don't want to do I don't want to be
in a clone. Maybe that's just like going for a walk.
Maybe that's what that is. But uh, can you say
your original question again? It was a good one. Oh
so expansion packs.
Speaker 3 (39:11):
Is Yeah, the expansion pack a lot of that.
Speaker 2 (39:14):
It feels like it's mental if you fully believe I
think that you, I mean, you have to have a
lot of courage to add an expansion pack. You have
to kind of you know, code it yourself. You have
to make a random weird dude, do you have to
do stuff?
Speaker 3 (39:33):
I got bored earlier in the year, so I started
like running marathons and stuff, and like I've done like
like like three half marathons and like like four ten k's,
and I thought that that was going to be like
my x PAC but it was just like really really
bad DC with like no content, like no in game
shot type shit.
Speaker 2 (39:51):
Yeah. Yeah, So so that means that marathon running was bad.
Speaker 3 (39:59):
No, it's not that it's bad. It's just like not
fulfilling as I don't know, getting stable in life, getting
a good job, getting degrees, having like things that you love.
I don't know. I just feel like at this point
I could kind of like pass away and like I
don't know, don't make a statue out of me for
being mediocre at best.
Speaker 2 (40:18):
Hmmm, Well, what's your wife think about life? Your life together?
What's what's her Uh? Does she have similar Uh?
Speaker 3 (40:31):
She's like as a she's like as accomplished and whatnot.
So like, you know, that's all good and dandy, but
she's kind of happy, just like playing the last stage
over and over again, whereas I'm like, this game's the
game's this game's bonk bro, like we're the new Mechanics.
Speaker 2 (40:46):
Yeah, I guess. How do you reinvent your life? That's
a very interesting question. How old did you say you
were I'm thirty one. Brother, that's cool. Well, you said
you wanted to play guitar, but then you gave that
you didn't want to. What about traveling? Do you want
to go anywhere?
Speaker 1 (41:06):
Dude?
Speaker 3 (41:06):
I want to travel, but I feel like if I travel,
like things are just kind of you know, like when
you leave your home and then you go somewhere else
for a long time and you come back and home
doesn't feel like home. I'm afraid of that.
Speaker 2 (41:21):
What do you mean by home doesn't feel like home?
Speaker 3 (41:27):
Okay? You know when you go somewhere and like you
experience a bunch of stuff and you're like, oh, I
want to experience this all the time, and then you
know it's like kind of fake because you're gonna come
back and then you're sleeping in your bed that you
slept in before you left, and you're just like this,
this isn't it man.
Speaker 2 (41:44):
You're you are thinking that you're saying that you might
like where you go more than you like your home,
and then the world will feel like your home instead
of your home feeling like your home.
Speaker 3 (41:53):
I think it's the inverse of that, where I like
leave and it shakes up like my fucking rhythm. And
then I go back and then I'm like, all my
rhythms all out of whack. This doesn't feel like it's
how it should be. But then after a minute, it
just kind of feels like how it should be.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
Aren't you Aren't you somewhat expressing a desire to have
your rhythm shook? Isn't that kind of what you're talking about?
Speaker 8 (42:13):
This?
Speaker 3 (42:14):
That's the whole thing, dude, No way, I'm autistic. I
like my rhythms, like you know, I keep my melody
at a at a steady taste.
Speaker 2 (42:22):
Okay, all right, So so so you're good.
Speaker 3 (42:28):
Now I'm chilling, dude, Like I'm chilling, and that's like,
what's worrying me? I feel like I shouldn't be chilling.
Speaker 2 (42:36):
That's it. Uh well, you know, I'm like, here's the thing.
It's funny because there's a like desire is so uh
like paradoxical in many ways because the I really do,
I really do believe in that whole like desire is
suffering thing. But then it's like, when you don't have desire,
(42:59):
you start to desire desire, right, which is what you're
kind of which is what I'm getting from you. Is
that you desire desire, which in and but it's a paradox. Honestly,
that's a desire you then possess what you want.
Speaker 3 (43:15):
That's kind of crazy because I always tell people like, dude, like,
imagine when you were a kid and like you you
figured out like how to spell and like how to
color within the lines, like that shit was fucking amazing,
Like it was you felt accomplished. And now it's you're
just like, oh, I got to work on time. Oh yeah,
I fucking I fucking hate everything else. I don't know, dude,
(43:35):
It's it's crazy, and it's not like I like I'm
craving the struggle. I grew up and I grew up struggling,
like I was a very poor trial, Like I couldn't
really speak until I was, you know, twelve, a lot
of speech therapy and shit, so like the struggle is real.
It's just, uh, I don't know. I think everybody should struggle,
Like all.
Speaker 2 (43:54):
The time you said you think you think everyone should struggle.
Speaker 3 (43:59):
I think everyone should struggle, like all the time. I
think like getting above and out of struggling is is
the true accomplishment of life, Like you're always fighting if that.
Speaker 2 (44:10):
Means I want.
Speaker 3 (44:11):
Yeah, like, right now, I'm like level ninety nine and
I'm just I'm just killing shit.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
Yeah, well, uh, why don't you help other people who
you feel like are struggling?
Speaker 3 (44:26):
Okay, so I thought about doing that, ironically enough, I
like wanted to be a social worker when I was,
you know, going to school, and I realized I don't
like people. I like smoking weed, playing video games, and like,
you know, I don't know, figuring shit out, and I
don't know. I guess I'm just still trying to figure
the shit out. Brother.
Speaker 2 (44:45):
Yeah uh yeah, by the way, not liking people understood, understandable,
stood shit. I yeah, dude, uh uh, you're good. Just
play video games and then and then die respectably.
Speaker 3 (45:02):
That's okay, hundred truly, while I'm dying, I'll think of
this conversation. And but before we get off the phone.
Speaker 2 (45:10):
I want to just hold out before you say what
you got to say. I hope that in the next
I hope, first of all, you're thirty one. I hope
you live. I hope you live at least forty more years.
And I hope that forty years from now, forty fifty,
I'll give you fifty. I hope you live at least
fifty more years, and I hope fifty years from now
(45:32):
that so many other things have happened in your life
that are much more exciting than this conversation, such that
you you don't you're not thinking about it when you die.
Speaker 3 (45:43):
What when else in my life? I'm going to talk
to a freaking get go man like I do.
Speaker 2 (45:48):
I don't know, but there might have. There might be
other things in your life that also happened that aren't
just this.
Speaker 3 (45:55):
Nah do not, dude. I've you for years now, I've
like maybe tried to call her text in twice. And
also I'm so confused why people say you sound different
on the phone. You sound exactly the same, Like you
sound exactly the same. It's ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (46:10):
I interrupted you as you were going to say something.
Speaker 3 (46:14):
Oh no, I was just gonna say, like, you know,
to to you and the audience before you. You booted
me off the lines of someone else who's more interesting
can come and start talking, like, keep doing whatever the
hell you want to do unless you're hurting somebody yourself,
and then stop doing that immediately. That's it.
Speaker 2 (46:33):
What's your name again? Carter?
Speaker 3 (46:35):
Brother?
Speaker 2 (46:35):
Carter, Carter I remembered it. Carter. Carter, I'm really happy
for you. I mean that I'm happy for you. I hope, uh,
keep keep doing. I'm gonna try to borrow some of
your energy.
Speaker 3 (46:47):
One one last question. If you're playing Rivals of Ether,
who you playing?
Speaker 2 (46:50):
Dude, I know what it is. I'm not. I don't.
I couldn't. I can't name a single character. I only
really play Melee.
Speaker 3 (46:57):
Okay, okay, that's fair enough. I figured since you were
a Melee head, you would have at least been, like,
you know, maybe in the in the realm of Ether.
Speaker 2 (47:04):
I like the lion guy. I'll say that, I like
the lion. I know there's a guy I like him.
Take care of Carter.
Speaker 3 (47:13):
See your brother.
Speaker 2 (47:16):
New game plus? Is that the key? I guess that's
the key? The key he's I was. I wish, you know,
I wish I would have actually talked to him more
about that idea that he said that everyone should be
struggling all the time, because I don't. I don't know. Uh,
(47:38):
I don't know if I think that's true or not.
I have no idea. I'm not. I'm not God. I
wish I was. I actually I don't. I don't wish
I was God. That's way too much. That's too much
to be God. I'm perfectly okay. I think being mortal
(48:00):
is a good gig. You get eighty if you're lucky,
you get eighty years. If you're not, you get twelve.
And you could put whatever you get what you get,
and then then you die and then you're done. That's it.
You work over if you're a mortal, if you're God,
Oh it sounds, Oh my god, nothing sounds more exhausting
(48:24):
than being God and being a mortal. I'd rather I'd
rather go right now than than live forever. That's too
that's too much. Still so lonely. I think dying would
suck more if not everyone did it. Like it like
if you like if if you're listening to this and
you're afraid of death, it's if you if you were
(48:44):
the only one where that had happened to that would
be really, that'd be really, that'd be horrifyingly sad if
you were the only one. But you're not. That's your
part of a bunch of stuff, and so so it's
not it's not good to be I don't know. I
haven't been talking for too long. I'm gonna end this.
Speaker 5 (49:05):
Hello, can you hear me?
Speaker 2 (49:08):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (49:08):
Hi?
Speaker 2 (49:09):
What is your name?
Speaker 5 (49:11):
Elena?
Speaker 2 (49:12):
Elena? What's up? Elena? How you doing? Dude?
Speaker 5 (49:17):
Nothing much, very chill today. I you know, opt on
your stream because I thought you were streaming.
Speaker 2 (49:24):
Where are you? Sound like you're in a public place
of some kind.
Speaker 5 (49:28):
Oh no, I am so sorry. I am in my
living room.
Speaker 2 (49:32):
Very cool, very nice. Well Elena, what do you want
to talk about today?
Speaker 5 (49:38):
Well? Actually I went to go see you in Pittsburgh
and I was like, like I kind of had a
little bit of a self realization based off of when
your uh, your guys is prompts.
Speaker 2 (49:56):
One of our prompts.
Speaker 5 (49:58):
Yeah. On the guy was talking about how, you know,
his life was perfect, and it was kind of like,
you know, yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
Can I can? I can I give the listeners some
context to what you're what you're about to talk about?
Speaker 5 (50:14):
Course.
Speaker 2 (50:15):
So I did a show in in Pittsburgh at the
Bottle Rocket Comedy Club shout out the Battle Rocket Comedy Club.
That place rocks, and this guy came on stage and
he talked about how he's He basically was saying that
he's like an alcoholic, but that his life is pretty great,
(50:36):
and so he has no incentive to change. Would you
say that's accurate?
Speaker 5 (50:42):
Yeah, that sounds about right.
Speaker 2 (50:44):
Yeah, he was based. That's basically what he was saying.
So tell me, tell me more about your experience. Uh,
listening to him talk, yeah, so I was.
Speaker 5 (50:56):
Like, damn, like I feel the I feel this way,
like I only have one hinderance in my life, and
besides that, I feel absolutely wonderful.
Speaker 2 (51:09):
Yeah, I didn't have good Uh. I was kind of
amazed by that guy too. I was thinking about his
situation because you know, he's he was definitely coming off
like he was more satisfied with his life than I
am with mine, and I didn't know, uh, and so
(51:31):
I really questioned it. I was really thinking about it.
I actually was thinking about that guy a lot as
while I was on stage with him and a little
bit after, because I was like, is if your life
is truly But that's the question, is there are you?
Is he Do you think he was maybe lying to
himself or maybe there was something we didn't know. I
don't know, but you know what if I don't actually
want to talk about that guy because he's not here
(51:53):
and you are, So tell me about your situation.
Speaker 4 (51:56):
Right.
Speaker 5 (51:56):
So I'm currently in school and I work a part
time job. But like, I have one problem in my life,
and that's that I have chronic pain.
Speaker 2 (52:15):
But your life is good other than that.
Speaker 5 (52:18):
Yeah, I mean i'd say, like the problem with it though,
is you know, it definitely is a mental toll. And
so I guess that's what I wanted to talk to
you about today, because like, you know, it feels great otherwise,
but you know, brings it puts you down sometimes.
Speaker 2 (52:38):
I do have to say, I think having chronic pain
is different from alcoholism because the chronic pain. Yeah, that
would say, that's a lot, that's a lot. Yeah, because
that guy was like, I drink seven beers a day
and my life is perfect, so I'm never gonna stop.
I think it's a little bit different from enjoy finding
way of finding how to uh really enjoy life despite
(53:02):
chronic pain. So I don't actually think those are remotely
comparable situations. But I'm I'm impressed. I'm impressed. I'm impressed
by it. Yeah, tell me more.
Speaker 5 (53:14):
Yeah, So, I've had a chronic pains for about the
past six years, and like you know, it's getting to
the point where I'm I'm a little snappy, and I
feel terrible, And just to like preface, I I did
sign up to go to actual therapy, so but I
(53:36):
thought i'd call and get your opinion on.
Speaker 2 (53:38):
It, my opinion on what exactly?
Speaker 5 (53:43):
Onke? How how do you think you would manage something
like this where you know it kind of hinders daily
life and just how to stay mentally well with it,
you know?
Speaker 2 (53:59):
But yeah, I used so sorry. I really wouldn't. I
really wouldn't. I was I was talking h on the
last podcast. I was talking about that guy Kendrick Norton Junior,
who got his arm cut off like five years ago
in a car accident. I don't know if you listened
to that, but that guy got his car cut off
(54:21):
in a car accident. And I was like looking at
his Instagram recently and he was like smiling and enjoying life.
And I don't have any advice. I have nothing for you,
because if that happened to me, I would just uh,
I would feel desolate. Right, Sorry, that's sorry. I don't know.
(54:44):
How do you deal with chronic physic I don't know, dude.
I had a cold last week and I almost fucking
had to kill myself. I mean, what kind of pain
do you have?
Speaker 5 (54:57):
So it's abdominal pain, and it's just like kind of
like a nice snapping you over and over again.
Speaker 2 (55:04):
Mm hm mm hmmm. Uh. I mean, well, I don't
know why you want my opinion on it, because you're
you open to this call by saying that you're doing
great and enjoying life. So I mean, I want your
opinion on it. Well, how do you do it?
Speaker 5 (55:22):
I mean, I'm I'm pretty thankful for the things I have,
so like, yeah, life is life is great. But then
I feel so bad because I take, I take it's
it's more frustrating than anything to have the paint. So
I feel bad because like I get moody and snappy,
(55:43):
and my boyfriend has to deal with it and my friends,
so it's it's, you know, it's hard because I'm a
little bit of a I get moody, I guess so.
Speaker 2 (56:03):
But so other than that, I mean, you're doing I
mean you have friends and you have a boyfriend and
you're you're you're you're chilling withstanding it. Yeah that's pretty good. Uh,
I'm I'm impressed. I'm impressed by that. Now, if I
have a little I have a little pimple, on my nose,
and I'm about ready to just cut the whole fucking
(56:24):
thing off. So uh, yeah, I have. I have a
little pimple on my nose, and it's ruined my entire life.
I have like I have like big i have like
life plans that I want to get to and I'm like,
I'm waiting until the pimple on my nose is gone
for me. That's how much of a of a pussy
I am when it comes to like dealing with any
(56:45):
kind of pain or discomfort or sickness. So I applaud
you on this.
Speaker 5 (56:51):
I appreciate that. Yeah, no, because, like I think, one
of the biggest factors to mental problems is actually another
thing from your show is the one guy was talking
about having a Oh my gosh, what's what's the male
opposite of a shysterectomy?
Speaker 2 (57:14):
And and does scopy and and no no.
Speaker 6 (57:16):
No, all that like.
Speaker 5 (57:20):
No, no, the yeah vasectomy ohect me.
Speaker 2 (57:27):
Oh yes, okay. So also at that Pittsburgh show, somebody
came on stage to talk about having a vasectomy. Yes, yes, yes, yeah.
Speaker 5 (57:35):
And so you know, I'm currently in college and I've
gone to all these doctors since I had the problems,
and I was like, dude, if it's because it stems
from my uterus? And so I said, if you have
to take this out, because what I have is chronic,
If you have to take this out, I am one
hundred percent willing. And unlike male doctors, they say, oh no,
(58:00):
like you can't really do anything, like you're too young,
you might change your mind, stuff like that.
Speaker 2 (58:11):
So wait, so male doctors are more likely to take
out the uterus than the female doctors. No, like.
Speaker 5 (58:20):
The women are less likely to be able to have
a permanent change to their like reproductive organs than males.
Like males are more likely to get the yes women,
it's like, no, you your husband might want kids. Stuff
like that.
Speaker 2 (58:39):
Is so art. Have you tried to get your uterus removed?
Speaker 5 (58:44):
Yes? I haven't. They've all told me and no, you're
too young, you're too young.
Speaker 2 (58:48):
How old are you?
Speaker 5 (58:50):
I am nineteen?
Speaker 2 (58:53):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (58:54):
I mean?
Speaker 2 (58:55):
Is did the doctors tell you that if you got
it removed, we get rid of the pain.
Speaker 5 (59:02):
They said that it could help. And at this point
I'm like, I will do anything.
Speaker 2 (59:10):
Well, she that's cool. Do do go do do go
see a doctor and whatever the doctor says, that's probably cool.
Right do you take like do you take like meds
(59:32):
for it? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (59:34):
I do.
Speaker 5 (59:36):
The problem with that is, like I am very against
because I understand opioid Egyptian. So it's not like the
stuff they give me isn't very strong and it doesn't
really help.
Speaker 2 (59:48):
Mm hm m hmm. Well you can. I mean, uh, well,
this is good, this is uh again. I'm impressed that
you're able to withstand any any pain of any kind.
And unlike the guy who came on stage at the
Pittsburgh show, you don't have to drink seven beers to
(01:00:09):
do it, so you know, good on, good on you,
good on you. What's your what's your name again?
Speaker 5 (01:00:16):
Elena?
Speaker 2 (01:00:18):
Elena? Well, Alena, is there anything else that you want
to say to the people of the computer or anything
at all before we go?
Speaker 5 (01:00:28):
If the dear guy from Pittsburgh is watching, he did
a great job.
Speaker 2 (01:00:32):
He did do a great job. He did do a
great job. Well, thank you very much for calling, Lena.
Speaker 5 (01:00:39):
Yes, thank you for answering.
Speaker 2 (01:00:41):
Have a good one you too. If it'll, honestly, dude,
if it'll stop this, if it'll get rid of this
pimple on my nose, I'll I will also get rid
of my uterus. I don't know if anyone knows a
doctor that can that will be willing to let me,
that will be willing to remove my uterists to stop
(01:01:03):
my nose pimple. By the way, for reference the deer
guy that she was referring to, I'll tell this story.
There was a guy in the comments section of my
YouTube channel shout out my boy Leon. This guy comments
on one of my YouTube videos and he goes he
says something like, hey man, I started doing stand up
(01:01:25):
comedy very recently, and I wanted and I started doing
this bit where I dress up like a deer and
I tell deer jokes. And I saw you coming to Pittsburgh,
and I was wondering if I could open for you.
And I didn't look at any of his YouTube videos beforehand.
I was just like, I was like zero vetting. I responded,
(01:01:51):
and I was like, absolutely, of course, of course, random
person from my YouTube comments, you can absolutely open for
my show in Pittsburgh. And he came and uh, he
did this show and he was at He was actually
really fucking good. He was really fucking good. He honestly,
(01:02:12):
I'm not saying this like I really mean this. I
think he did better than I did. I genuinely like
like when just crowd reaction, he did better than I did.
So we are we are one for one on putting
our faith in in people from the YouTube comments, uh so,
(01:02:36):
shout out Leon, shout out the deer guy.
Speaker 7 (01:02:38):
Hello, folks, it's Lyle here. That's the end of this episode.
But get this, I'm releasing a bonus episode this week.
That's right, an entire extra hour of the podcast that
you can listen to by becoming a premium member of
Therapy Gecko over at therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com.
(01:03:00):
Supercast subscribers get access to bonus episodes. They get a
completely add free podcast feed of the regular show, they
get recordings from my live shows, members only streams, and
they help support my ability to continue doing this podcast.
So here's a clip from this week's members only bonus episode.
So you went to art school for two years and
(01:03:21):
then you had to leave.
Speaker 2 (01:03:24):
Why do you have to leave?
Speaker 3 (01:03:26):
I mean, the main reason I'm gonna be boring with
you in money.
Speaker 1 (01:03:29):
Holy shit.
Speaker 2 (01:03:31):
Yeah, that's great. That's by the by the way, by
the way, by the way, a great reason to leave
art school no shade on the arts, but a little
shade on art school, because like, look, man, if you
want to be an artist, you can learn how to
be a great artist to just on the fucking internet.
You know, you don't need to give some fucking douchebag
two hundred thousand dollars anyway. I mean, you're you're, you
(01:03:52):
are done with that?
Speaker 4 (01:03:53):
Now?
Speaker 8 (01:03:53):
Do you?
Speaker 2 (01:03:53):
Are you in any debt?
Speaker 3 (01:03:56):
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah yeah?
Speaker 8 (01:03:59):
How much?
Speaker 5 (01:04:00):
It's not great?
Speaker 1 (01:04:05):
What is it? I want to say?
Speaker 3 (01:04:07):
At least twenty to thirty thousand?
Speaker 2 (01:04:10):
Oh okay, all right, yeah, I've I've heard, I've heard
worst numbers. If you want to hear this full conversation,
you can sign up to become a premium member at
therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com, or find the link
in the episode description that's therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com.
(01:04:32):
All right, I have nothing else to say. Therapy goes
on the line, taking your phone calls.
Speaker 8 (01:04:39):
Every nine, goes to teachings in the line.
Speaker 2 (01:04:45):
He's not an expert.
Host
Lyle Drescher
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