January 7, 2025 • 52 mins
Today, this is what's important:
Non-alcoholic beer, Drake, dogs, colon cancer tests, porn, villages, masturbation, sex, & more.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to This Is Important, a production of iHeart Radio,
the show where we talk about what's obviously most critically
crucially important today.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
On This is Important, we need to make sure you
gape your buttholes.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
Sometimes your vagina does. Then you know it's time to go.
Speaker 4 (00:22):
But I'm hearing that women don't really like having sex
very long anymore. That's the new thing. Let's go.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Okay already, Heineken zero zero is going down extra smooth
right now.
Speaker 4 (00:46):
I would if I got a big fucking boner.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Right now, figure out how to open it.
Speaker 5 (00:51):
Yeah, well, just get a bottle opener, brother, come on.
Speaker 6 (00:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
I will say they're my favorite out of all the
non alcoholic beers.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
I'm loving this. Yeah, it's not bad.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Have you done a taste test?
Speaker 3 (01:03):
Yeah, I've well, I've tasted a lot of them because
I'm sober Sally right now, so I've I've had quite
a few, and i'd say, uh, I'd say they're one
of their top their top tier for sure.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
I'm a saint Polly's boy.
Speaker 5 (01:17):
Oh are you?
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Oh dude, finally, wait, Blake, can I just ask you
wait what that sound bite did you just drop? Which
I think I was like, Hey, you should put that
on there. That seems like something relevant to us. Did
you just upload that recently or has that been in
the cut.
Speaker 5 (01:35):
I've had it in the cut for a while. It's
from a Drake song.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
Because you're a huge Drake fan.
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Now I'm yes, I have final in the corner. I'm
now a drakesman, big Drake energy.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Yeah. As soon as the Dick video came out, you
were like, he's pretty good. Honestly.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
Oh yeah, we did talk what happened, man, what happened
to Drake?
Speaker 2 (01:59):
We when his wriggle raggle got raggled out.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
We talked about it. Remember he had his he had
his large cock in his hand on like an in
an airplane when he was full masked.
Speaker 5 (02:10):
I kind of talked about it.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
I sort of remember that. Yeah, No, I do.
Speaker 4 (02:15):
Adam has never seen a dick, he remembered. I don't.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
I don't. You had a long penis. Yeah, but you
that's not necessarily the thickest one I've ever seen. And
it kind of tapered off in a way that doesn't
appeal to me.
Speaker 4 (02:27):
But yeah, you you were claiming that he grabbed it
far too close to the base.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
Right based God Yeah, that's it. That's an old trick.
That's it. When you're sending Dick pics. That's an old trick.
Not that I ever have, right but right, but that
that would be my trick.
Speaker 4 (02:42):
I got a big fucking boner right now.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
Okay, But just to just to really close the loop
on this, that's when that Dick video came out. That's
when Blake was like, we gotta unearth some Drake drops.
Speaker 3 (02:57):
Whatever happened to wasn't he beefing with uh with Kendrick Klamar?
Whatever happened to that?
Speaker 2 (03:03):
It's only gotten crazier, and I'm glad we're talking about it. Yes, Uh,
Drake's like suing him for defamation WHOA or his record
label or something.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
Oh yeah, He's like taking down the entire like music
industry to destroy him. He's like claiming that like he
paid for like listens or something to get it or
like like.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
But there was some yeah, yeah, exactly that there was
some like business sorcery to suppress Drake's listens versus uh Kendrick.
Because I guess you can like pay more for Spotify
to like feature you a little bit more, you know,
but like I like how Drake's saying, yeah, I'm suing.
It's basically happening, like this is just what we do.
(03:50):
This is just how business works.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
Yeah, I mean that is bitch made, but but it's
bitch made to sue because you're like, I'm gonna go
and tell my dad, ye know your dad yee.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:03):
It's kind of like when you would play the Homie
at like Super Nintendo and he'd be losing then he
turned the game off.
Speaker 5 (04:08):
It's just not cool, man, just because.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
You're losing that what you would do.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
Yeah, no, man, it's I feel like it's a little
different than that. Well, I could see you being a
little bitch bike about video games.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
Adam, you don't think it's exactly like what Blake just said.
It's been a while, Adam thinks it's a little different.
Speaker 3 (04:23):
No, I think it might be a little different.
Speaker 5 (04:25):
But I never did that.
Speaker 2 (04:26):
But yeah, like, are movies suing other movies because they're
in ten of the theaters of like the of the
like twelve screens or whatever, And you're like, I'm just
the substance. I'm trying to crack in, well, trying to
get some eyeball.
Speaker 5 (04:39):
Maybe they're going to start doing.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
That you can't.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
Well, I wonder, I wonder because is that illegal to do?
You know, if it's illegal to do, then then okay,
then unearth m But I mean, I.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Did not forget Adam's all about legality.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Actually, I'm a legal guy. I'm a legal legalese.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Adam's all about the up and up.
Speaker 3 (04:58):
I'm all about that legalese.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Like a.
Speaker 4 (05:01):
Boy.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
Which is a real word?
Speaker 4 (05:03):
Is this is it the word?
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Blake? We just found out we've known you more than
half of our lives.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Huh, upwards of twenty years?
Speaker 3 (05:13):
Yeah, more than twenty years. And we just found out
that you have a dog.
Speaker 4 (05:21):
Crazy.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
Yeah, you own a dog.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
You're a dog owner.
Speaker 4 (05:24):
Yes, I've had a dog for yeah, close to like,
I don't know, six six seven years.
Speaker 3 (05:30):
Now, you've had a dog for six.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
Or seven six seven years.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
You've never we've talked about dogs all the time. You
never second, you've never mentioned that you have a dog.
That's such a crazy Wait a second? Six seven years?
Speaker 4 (05:43):
Maybe yeah, right around there?
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Maybe hang on, is this a blake Anderson? Six seven years?
Or is this like a legit actual two or three years?
Speaker 4 (05:51):
Well, now I'm trying to calculate how long I've been
with Zam but yeah, ever since you moved.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
So this is a sam dog.
Speaker 4 (05:59):
I didn't you this dog. This dog was bestowed upon me.
It was a package dealmouth rocks exactly, thank you and
uh yeah. So I don't really claim the dog because
I didn't pick the dog. I didn't choose the dog.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
My dog.
Speaker 3 (06:14):
But I seem like you hate this dog. Do you
like this dog? I don't.
Speaker 5 (06:18):
I don't. I don't. I don't love the dog.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Okay, what are we talking? We're talking about? Is this
a rescue? This is a purebread? Is this something I would
approve of?
Speaker 3 (06:27):
So that's why, that's why you don't claim the dog?
Is you you?
Speaker 4 (06:30):
You?
Speaker 3 (06:31):
There's some animosity, to be fair, I love dogs.
Speaker 4 (06:36):
Dogs are rat but I'm not really I'm not a
super pet guy. I'm not really into pet.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Do all dogs go to heaven in your opinion?
Speaker 4 (06:44):
I don't think they do. I don't think this one
is going to heaven. It's kind of a demon dog.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
Is it kind of a dog? Or what's the deal?
Why don't you love this dog?
Speaker 4 (06:53):
It's just a really complex it's a very complex dog.
I don't I don't want to ship talk on this dog.
It's just a case. Damn list is.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
We didn't ask you to ship on the dog. We
just wondered why we had never heard of the dog.
Speaker 3 (07:06):
Yeah, we're just asking some questions about the dog. We
didn't know that this dog existed, the fact that you've
lived this dog has been in your house that you
own for six or seven years.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
I think he said seven or eight years. Oh no,
I don't think it's eight years.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
And by the way, I don't even want to come
at you with this hard like today. I rolled into
this episode being like, I feel like we've been riding
Blake Yeah too hard.
Speaker 4 (07:32):
Guys. You know You've been fucking giving it to me.
I'm getting eyefall towered by you bros. Every week.
Speaker 2 (07:37):
Well that's kind of fun if I can remember to
make an apology later will if I can remember. But
I've been like, whoa, we ride this guy kind of hard,
and today I'm like, let's let's ease off the brakes.
And then I found out you have a dog you've
never talked about.
Speaker 3 (07:51):
The only reason we ride this guy hard is because
it's it's stuff like this. It's stuff exactly like this
docky where he'll just casually drop that he owns a
dog that has lives with him for six seven years.
We talk about dogs kind of often. I'd say, it's
a topic that comes up on the on the podcast.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
It's a dog heavy positive dog.
Speaker 4 (08:11):
It is pretty I know and I and I have
to really hold my tongue when what kind of dog?
Some kind of like poot, it's like a poodle something.
It's a little.
Speaker 3 (08:19):
Guy who I see, I see why you don't love it?
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Like a like a mixed breed.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
I believe it has one or yeah, like two two
breeds to it.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
That's a mix.
Speaker 4 (08:28):
Yeah, okay, that's a mix. That's a poodle.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
Do you walk this dog? Ever?
Speaker 4 (08:33):
I have I have?
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Do you have to?
Speaker 2 (08:36):
I mean?
Speaker 3 (08:37):
What size ships does this dog ship?
Speaker 4 (08:39):
Very little, very tiny ships are It's a it's a
small dog. It's just and it doesn't shed?
Speaker 3 (08:44):
Does it shed?
Speaker 4 (08:46):
No?
Speaker 2 (08:46):
No?
Speaker 3 (08:47):
Well, what's not to like about this dog?
Speaker 4 (08:49):
Just kind of mean? Little mean?
Speaker 5 (08:50):
Is the little nippy?
Speaker 2 (08:51):
Is it in charge?
Speaker 4 (08:52):
I know? But you know what, she has some real
fight to her. I appreciate charge in charge. It's not
in charge. I've tried to check this dog before and
she doesn't back down.
Speaker 5 (09:07):
She's very feisty, and I like the.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
Whole thing is you are not supposed to back down.
They don't back down until you don't back down. Have
you seen Caesar MYLM have this dude just lets dogs
bite them and then looks at them like this doesn't hurt. Yeah,
even though you know he's in pain.
Speaker 3 (09:24):
Who is that? Is that the Dog Whisperer?
Speaker 4 (09:26):
Yes, which that show is great, Like he takes down
some really scary little dog, but he gets bitten.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
He does, and then just doesn't act like it. Yeah,
and then the dog is like like what the fuck?
Why isn't so you need to fight this dog? A
lah Carrie Bucy surviving the game speech okay, okay, fair enough.
I don't know, should be a whole SoundBite in its own,
just hit.
Speaker 5 (09:53):
Play, we could pull it up.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
So Blake dropped that bomb on us where it's almost
so friendship betrayal that we didn't know yet a dog
as I was pretty but I felt betrayed there. Okay,
but then also he dropped a little bit of a
bomb that he was saying that he wants to get
his butthole fingered.
Speaker 4 (10:13):
We're the three best friends.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
Right before you jumped on the podcast.
Speaker 4 (10:19):
I didn't say I want to get my butthole finger.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
Before I got on, before you got on, because we
were waiting a little bit for you.
Speaker 4 (10:25):
You're stuck in traffic or whatever.
Speaker 2 (10:26):
I was, yeah, I'm sorry about that.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
Yeah, And so we're waiting just kind of in the
zoom lobby, just chilling, and Blake kind of out of
nowhere said that he wants to get his butthole fingered.
Please explain loose butthole.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
Well, you can do that. You don't even have to wait.
Speaker 4 (10:43):
I'm aware that I wasn't saying I want to get
my butthole fingered. I just said I've been thinking I
need to get checked for all the butthole diseases.
Speaker 3 (10:54):
Where they yeah, you know that the doctors say it's
for it used to be fifty Carently, Isaac was He's
say it's fifty. They don't figure buttle into your fifty,
right right, getting radical, And we think that maybe the
doctor looked at his butthole and was like, nah, good good,
I'm coming back. I want to kick this can down
the road. I'm back because my doctor told me forty five.
(11:17):
So I've been hearing it's younger. I've been hearing you
should go in at forty to get your get your
prostate colon?
Speaker 4 (11:25):
Yeah, what is it?
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Ros state checked? Yeah, colon for colon cancer something.
Speaker 4 (11:29):
But like why not, like why why not just get
a checked? Like why do they always say like you
just wait, yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
Get it go in there twenty thirty Yeah, times a week.
Speaker 3 (11:40):
Yeah, yeah, you're not wrong, but why why is there?
Does this disease run in your family or.
Speaker 4 (11:45):
No, not that I'm aware of, okay, yeah, but.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
Is it a disease?
Speaker 3 (11:50):
What is like cancer?
Speaker 4 (11:52):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Yeah, yeah, I don't know like the terminology like colon science.
I think cancer is a disease.
Speaker 4 (11:58):
I believe virus.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
H Dude. I just got all the test results back
from my physical and just came the doctor called me
and you know when they call you.
Speaker 4 (12:08):
That's like, oh shit, what was that?
Speaker 2 (12:09):
Right?
Speaker 3 (12:10):
They told me that I have It's not crazy, but
it's something I should watch high cholesterol and yeah yeah,
and they they said that I should uh work out
more and lift weights what And I'm like, dude, that's
all I do?
Speaker 2 (12:28):
Yeah? Do you listen to my world famous podcast?
Speaker 3 (12:32):
I'm like, it's all I do. If I lifted in
my wife would leave me if I was in the
gym or at physical therapy.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
More often a moment longer.
Speaker 4 (12:40):
Huh yeah, So.
Speaker 3 (12:42):
She begs her packed did.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
You tell them you eat an entire chicken a night.
Speaker 3 (12:47):
I've slowed down on the chicken. I've so down on
the chicken, and I've so down on the red meat too,
And I heard that's what really does it? So I
don't know what it is. And also they told me
that I should watch my drinking because I have an
enlarged liver.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
Whoa, So you know this is news to you somehow? Yeah, news,
This is not news to anyone listening.
Speaker 4 (13:08):
Fuck it.
Speaker 3 (13:09):
Sure, I bet it's a little enlarged. And they said
it wasn't anything crazy, but you know, watch your drinking
in large liver.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Dude, you should have been like, have you have you
ever seen a bigger one?
Speaker 5 (13:19):
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Larger is better, right.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
Yeah, Well, the bummers. I didn't get to talk to
the doctor. He left a voicemail with all this on it,
so I was like, oh shit, ah damn it.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
That doesn't seem kosher.
Speaker 4 (13:29):
Yeah yeah, huh oh you did.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
And I'm questioning who has the most in large liver
and maybe we could all go to the doctor before
the next live show get these results, right.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
Yes, we've talked about doing something like this, measure the tea.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
Yeah, talk about let's go tea.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
Yeah, let's get a physical from the base. Yeah everything.
Speaker 4 (13:51):
What if we even like go behind a curtain and
then like you know, they do one of those cool
tubes that they put like down your throat and stuff.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
You wish it's cool, bro, we go behind a curtain,
so they put them in down our throats?
Speaker 3 (14:05):
Yeah, do we need a curtain for this? You could
do that on stage? Dude, you don't know.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
How about we go behind a curtain for the prostate exam?
Speaker 3 (14:13):
I thought you meant like you put your head through
the curtain and the asses behind the curtain and then
he checks your ass back there.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
But you're this is Adam's favorite porto category.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
But yeah, go ahead, we could do that too. Anything
could happen behind.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
That had a category. That category had a run for
about four years. It was just like a woman at
a lemonade stand on a boardwalk getting sucked from behind
the curtain, going.
Speaker 4 (14:37):
On, Oh do you want to those are pretty cool?
Speaker 3 (14:42):
It's only sixty nine, say yeah, right, oh yeah, oh yeah,
those are really good.
Speaker 4 (14:49):
Those are The acting is always really phenomenal, and the people.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Ordering the lemonade are like somebody a block away goes,
will you go order lemonade over there? Like all right,
the per twenty bucks act normal.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
I feel like the pornos galacting in pornos have really
gotten it's slowed down. I feel like when we when
we were in our peak, when we were in our
peak porno watching eras sure, sure October, you guys might
still be.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Halloween every year ago ahead.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
I feel I feel there was there was production value
in the pornos and it was it was absolutely and
more of an event because they were selling the DVDs,
they were selling the VHS's yes, for the for the
Dad Gone.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
There was a fork in the road.
Speaker 4 (15:39):
There was a fork in the road.
Speaker 2 (15:41):
And we all know remember when they spent like I
don't know, I think it was like a million dollars
or something crazy, ten million dollars on the Pirate one
Pirate of the Caribbean. Yes, and it was like it
was like this is the future. And then it was
absolutely the opposite of yeah, where they're like, no, you
(16:01):
have a van, we're gonna pick up a woman and
throw her out of the van. Actually that's the new style. Yeah,
And it was like, well, I'm not asking for that either.
If I could just get a middle of the road
where there's a little bit of set design and no
one's getting thrown out of a van.
Speaker 4 (16:16):
Yeah, we're good to go.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
Yeah, what was the throwing out of the van? I
wish they I mean, we did a whole sketch a
b we did this about how like we did a
bang Bus sketch way back in the day, and that
was when we first harnessed the power of the internet
because it went mildly viral, very moderately viral, and then
bang Bus sent us a lot of free merch.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Great, and they were pioneers.
Speaker 3 (16:42):
They were pioneers, which we were very excited about. We
were all in our early twenties. It was very excited.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
But if I could give them one note, it's the
idea of like driving around and then a woman's like, yeah,
fuck me and this van very cool, hot hot, hot hot.
But then when you're like throw them out of the van,
they're standing in the corner with their clothes. You're like, yeah, dude, what, Yeah,
that's not why are you doing that? You just what?
Speaker 3 (17:08):
Yeah? You know. The the cooler thing would have been
they found their wife getting married. Yeah yeah, they're like wow,
I would like they actually drive to that white chapel
in Vegas and they're.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
Just like, well, the drivers a priest.
Speaker 3 (17:23):
That's cool.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
Yeah, you know, Oh I didn't know.
Speaker 3 (17:26):
As they're doing it doggy style, he's he's, you know,
doing the sermon.
Speaker 4 (17:31):
Yeah, he's like, you may now kiss the bride.
Speaker 2 (17:34):
They step on like the glass and they say him
and they're like, yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
Oh they're Jewish and I assume they could be. Sure,
could we assume they could be?
Speaker 4 (17:44):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (17:45):
Black?
Speaker 5 (17:45):
White?
Speaker 2 (17:50):
But I just was always I was always bummed out
that I was part of I mean, look, the whole
dark thing.
Speaker 3 (17:55):
But like you weren't.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
They're kicking them out of the van. You're like, guys, it's.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
Not Wait, is are you admitting to something publicly? You
are part of it? Why do you keep saying you were.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
Part Yeah, you're partaking, You're you're partaking?
Speaker 4 (18:07):
You are you are?
Speaker 2 (18:08):
I mean I'm not. Look, Kyle's not here to go
on about the dark deep corners of porno.
Speaker 3 (18:15):
Kyle Kyle knows better more than any of us.
Speaker 5 (18:18):
Yeah, he did work in it a little bit.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Well, look I'm I'm clicking. I'm clicking, and you know,
I'm seeing the ads for uh load booz.
Speaker 4 (18:26):
Absolutely, and we.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
Could circle back to that.
Speaker 3 (18:28):
But I feel like our podcast is definitely porn adjacent.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
I feel like, sure they aren't.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
We not in the industry, but.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
Everyone's a little bit of a whore.
Speaker 4 (18:44):
When's the last time you guys dusted off like an
old vintage porn because those are those are awesome, like
seventies pornos.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
No you can, I just okay, so just real quick,
like dust it off or like typed in retro.
Speaker 4 (18:59):
Yeah, sure, yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Once a year I type in retro dust it off?
No you wait?
Speaker 3 (19:04):
And also neither And also I'm saying, buy a vh
a VHS player, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (19:12):
A VCR put in like an old tape from underneath,
like your dad's bed, and like let it ride.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Blake, you're famous, you know that, right?
Speaker 5 (19:21):
Why what does that have to do with anything?
Speaker 2 (19:23):
Where are you going to these places where you need
to dust off tapes? You know that they go? Well,
Blake Anderson is here here, I'm gonna text everyone I
know tweet about it. Uh here again tm G Sizzle
will be outside when he's here for the third time today.
Speaker 3 (19:40):
Yeah, I mean, do those places still exist. I haven't
gone on a road trip in so long.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
They do because of relationships, you know, where people are like, sure, Todd,
how are you good? Did you guys get my videos in?
You know that we did?
Speaker 7 (19:54):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (19:55):
Sure, yeah we got. They don't want to let down
the local community.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
It's a community.
Speaker 4 (19:59):
Yeah, wow, that's true. I could feel that Janet died.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Well, it was for a while because we when we
would go to that hunting trip. There we go, there
was no sultzer, so no internet out there. For the
longest time, it was very hard to get it was
super it was super spotty.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
And to make your own pornos, I get it.
Speaker 4 (20:21):
And you couldn't watch the pornos. Sure that sucks.
Speaker 3 (20:23):
But in the last five or six years, suddenly lightning
lightning speed. Now all those rural areas are now able
to get their pornos. So the little porn barn down
the way.
Speaker 4 (20:36):
Extinct it Oh yeah, extinct.
Speaker 3 (20:39):
It's it's mad dusty. You'd have to dust everything off.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
Yeah, type in retro.
Speaker 3 (20:44):
It is too bad.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
Yeah, it's a bummer. I mean, this is like those
someone just got like a starlink to a village and
the village got porno or they got phones or something,
and then within like two weeks, the entire village of
the dudes in the village were all just walking around
watching porno. Yeah, like all that.
Speaker 4 (21:04):
Oh yeah, isn't that just like kind.
Speaker 3 (21:07):
Of like a yep telling Yeah, it's like a yuh huh. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
Man, that's the biggest yuh huh I've ever heard in
my life.
Speaker 3 (21:15):
Imagine you live in a village.
Speaker 4 (21:19):
Eyes, I'm there.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
Now, You've never seen any other women but the women
in your village, and you're related to a lot of them.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
I'm dressed as a construction worker, different village, not the
village people.
Speaker 6 (21:31):
Different on now, come on, I'm a biker in assless
leather chaps, differently different, and you've never seen anyone outside
of this village.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
Suddenly you can see every woman, imaginable, every color and creed,
all walks, I mean.
Speaker 4 (21:56):
Shows absolutely, and you can see and there there work
had a lemonade stand and.
Speaker 3 (22:02):
I remember the first I mean, it's I'm sure just
shocks would shock them.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
You've got the floor, Adam, You've got the floor.
Speaker 4 (22:09):
You're getting emotional, and you're getting.
Speaker 3 (22:11):
The first time I remember seeing a naked woman.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Adam picked up the microphone.
Speaker 5 (22:16):
He's holding his heart.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
Yeah, the first time I remember seeing a naked woman.
I opened it.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
What was your mom doing?
Speaker 3 (22:23):
It wasn't my mom. It wasn't my mom. First time outside,
I'm sure I saw my mom. But outside of my mom,
she had no last see an impact. And I was
waiting for my mom to pay for something, and I
there was a porno rack right here. It was a
shitty gas station and I'm standing there. Yeah, and I
(22:43):
grabbed him back. So your mom was there, Yeah, my
mom was right there. I didn't know what I was grabbing.
I just gobbed a magazine and I opened it. There
was a woman and she was holding her tit. She
had like a big, big tit and she had him
like cropped up on her arm like this, and they're
flopped over.
Speaker 5 (23:02):
Sh like a like a falconer.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
Yes, she was resting her tits on her arm like
much like a falcon ghost face killing And yeah, okay,
it's just the way stopped me dead in my tracks.
Like I had a hard time breathing. I was so
excited like, and I was young. I probably was seven
or eight, monster, I was like a little kid, and.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
It just the possibilities of the world have just shattered, shifted,
completely annihilated your reality.
Speaker 3 (23:27):
Oh my god, your boots are huge. I could honestly
cry thinking about it. That's wild.
Speaker 2 (23:32):
Yeah, I think that that answers almost everything.
Speaker 5 (23:35):
But yeah, about your entire career.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
Yeah, I mean if that makes you missed it, I go,
uh huh, wow, that's another.
Speaker 3 (23:44):
It was beautiful, dude, it was beautiful. The female body
is absolutely falconer, absolutely incredible and hot hot. I'm excited
for these villagers to get to send it, to get
to see it for the.
Speaker 4 (23:57):
First Send it in a real way, in a real way.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
And do you think there's in any way you just
trying to recreate Have you been falconing?
Speaker 3 (24:07):
Well, I tell you what, the women in this village
probably aren't walking around their tit with their tits like
their falconers, or doing all the crazy stuff that they
do in these magazines and now on the internet. I
bet they're not doing that. I bet they're not doing that.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
Yeah, there's no way, there's no way. There's no way
you ever type in retro.
Speaker 5 (24:25):
It's really good, don't you ever.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
But they say like a lot of this like moral
is like kind of it's rotting the mind.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
They say, they say that they I'll say it, it's
rotting the mines.
Speaker 3 (24:38):
Yeah, of course, yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't watch it
too much. You can't watch it too much.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
I agree, there's no such thing as watching it too much.
Speaker 4 (24:45):
Now they're going to try to like do like weird
moves in the bedroom, crass.
Speaker 3 (24:52):
You can't, you can't watch you can't watch it too much.
Speaker 4 (24:56):
Next thing, you know, you're at your village. Everybody's trying
to do pile drivers getting.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
Can you imagine? But like do you think in these
villages like they're bored right, Well, no, there's no TV,
so I got to imagine they've already done all this stuff.
Speaker 3 (25:16):
No, no, no, they.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Might be able to teach us a thing or two.
Speaker 3 (25:18):
They have it. They they didn't. They didn't even know
that that stuff was available to them. They did not
even have you ever looked up village porn?
Speaker 2 (25:26):
But what else are they doing?
Speaker 3 (25:27):
They're they're trying to survive unders. There's no boredom because
they're actively trying.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
They've figured out farming. You think they're just tired. At
the end of the day. They don't have the strength
to pile drives.
Speaker 3 (25:37):
They're too tired, dude.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
This is the way, dude.
Speaker 3 (25:39):
Sometimes I'm a forty year old man, I have a
bad back. I have spasms at the end of the day.
Speaker 4 (25:45):
I'm tired, you know, dude. I think and these villagers
who are I think in any past civilization, it's like
noted that like all people lived for was to fuck
each other.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
Well, sure, I don't think they got they get spasms
out there in the village.
Speaker 3 (26:00):
That's not all passive civilizations. That's ancient Rome and Greece.
Speaker 4 (26:05):
I'm saying in places that don't have like because I'm
going to the past, because we're talking about people who
don't have access to internet or television. They they out
of each other constantly. They were doing freaky stuff.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
Well I think in in Yeah, in Greece they did.
They literally would fuck the ship out of each other.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
Literally. Yeah. But just as like Kamasutra, like these books,
these are these are tales as old as time.
Speaker 3 (26:29):
Yeah, and honestly, maybe you're maybe you're right, Kamasusa.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
They didn't have the internet, Yeah, have their imaginations, Adam.
Speaker 3 (26:35):
I imagine these sweet, these sweet village people and they're
not gaping each other's buttholes.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
Why I don't know what.
Speaker 3 (26:43):
Yeah, maybe I don't know.
Speaker 2 (26:45):
But by the way, I think about this all the time.
I'm still I know you.
Speaker 5 (26:49):
I know you're all the time.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
I know you do.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
But no, no, no, but just like here, you're like, they
don't have give them but holes. All it takes is
for one person in charge to be like, and the
women in here, we need to make sure you gape
your buttholes. It's just what we do here. Ye, like,
think about it every every woman in Western.
Speaker 3 (27:10):
War you think about this all the time.
Speaker 4 (27:13):
And that's in order.
Speaker 6 (27:14):
No.
Speaker 2 (27:15):
I think about things that are introduced into cultures that
just become like the status quo.
Speaker 4 (27:20):
Sure sure, yeah, yeah, yeah, the norm, like eating eggs,
like cell phones eat eating eggs, but like shaving pubic care,
like people just are like, who did women shave their
legs in their armpits?
Speaker 2 (27:32):
And they only do that because apparently, like during the
war when we were all gone to sell razors, razor
companies were like, uh, don't tell me you're hairy, be smooth,
shave your legs July or what the fuck? Effort, you know,
and then women were like embarrassed to be hairy.
Speaker 3 (27:49):
Yeah, I would say solid move gellette.
Speaker 2 (27:51):
And that's just like a couple steps away from a
gaping butthole demand.
Speaker 5 (27:55):
Well, what brand is going to ask people to gape there?
Speaker 4 (27:58):
But what would be that?
Speaker 5 (27:59):
There's not a lot of gi do it.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
Why does gap want? Why does big want?
Speaker 4 (28:07):
Once you gape?
Speaker 2 (28:07):
Once you gaped, it's arbitrary. It could be anybody. It
could be Uh, it could be paper mate. It could
be anybody, guys.
Speaker 3 (28:14):
It could be paper mate.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
It could be paper mate, It could be fucking it
could be uniball.
Speaker 3 (28:19):
You know, you're just looking for stuff around you're.
Speaker 4 (28:22):
Yes, let's see, you're really just looking at It could
be sharpie you guys.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
It could be anybody.
Speaker 3 (28:29):
I don't know if it could could be.
Speaker 4 (28:32):
Well maybe maybe.
Speaker 3 (28:33):
Because or like a lipstick company, because you know, like
they might write things on the butt like gape me
like you know, it's a little slogan or something.
Speaker 4 (28:45):
Yes, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (28:46):
I mean it makes more sense than just than just
to say you fucking did staple or whatever the hell
he's talking about.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
Definitely, yeah, but think about like, uh, is it the
you bangis who used to put like the plates and
the stuff in their lips or like the extend their necks.
That was just some dude being like, honey, will you
like put all these things on your neck and make
it longer and then put this plate in your ear
and your lip and then like some dude was like, actually,
it's kind of fly, I'm gonna start doing it. And
(29:15):
then now you've got this entire culture where they've got
plates in their lips, et cetera, and it's hot and
it's popping. Yeah, and uh it just started with some
person going should we do this? Are we doing this?
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Yeah? Or like it's cool that you knew the name
of that village. I think that stop that. But uh
it's also I don't know if it's the name of
the village, but like the culture that the culture people
whatever that was you knew a cool word that I
didn't know, and I was impressed by it.
Speaker 4 (29:44):
Yeah, the job or like when people.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
Used to powder their wigs, like I watched that, Uh
that dumb Franklin we covered the show.
Speaker 4 (29:52):
Yeah, yeah, but that was because they were like yeah
they were they had diseased it. They had like fucking scurvy.
And ship and they looked like shit.
Speaker 2 (29:59):
You guys, SA they stunk and they stunk so bad
they wore smelling good smelling wicks.
Speaker 4 (30:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (30:06):
Yeah, I'm also sort of like, just they had water,
just clean yourself more often.
Speaker 4 (30:13):
But did they have soap? Here comes to lope? Mhmm.
Maybe they didn't have to. I'm assuming they had some
some kind of something.
Speaker 2 (30:20):
All I'm saying is that these things they get introduced
to villages. Next thing, you know, it's status.
Speaker 4 (30:26):
You're fucking in a lemonade.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Stand your next thing, you know, you're fucking eliminade, the
the end, the end point. Next you know, your best
friend has a dog you've never known about. Fucking what?
Speaker 3 (30:42):
Yeah, that's wild.
Speaker 2 (30:45):
Maybe.
Speaker 3 (30:47):
No, By the way, I don't been over to your house.
Speaker 4 (30:50):
Where was this dog like under the stairs?
Speaker 2 (30:54):
What?
Speaker 4 (30:55):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (30:55):
These stairs are like ones that are just floating right.
Speaker 4 (30:59):
Yeah, but the dog can't be really around people when
visitors come over. Still usually put the dog in my
room when visitors are around your Okay, yes.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Okay, I think I mentioned on this podcast about how
I grew up with people who had a monster house,
big house, and well to do family. Hang on, cut
the dog in the basement and they just let it
ship everywhere. Huh Oh, isn't that crazy?
Speaker 4 (31:27):
That is crazy? Like they want't ten to the dog.
That's animal But if you go.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
Down there to like get a case of beer for
your parents out of the refrigerator, and you I stepped
in ship, I remember, and I was like, I stepped
in if your dog pooped, and they're like, yeah, poops
down there, don't go down there, and you gotta look around.
And I was like, no, they didn't.
Speaker 4 (31:47):
They didn't clean it at all.
Speaker 5 (31:48):
They just let the ship a mask.
Speaker 2 (31:50):
They just closed the door. They closed the door.
Speaker 5 (31:52):
Some people is weird.
Speaker 4 (31:53):
Wow, that's weird.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
And they know who they are.
Speaker 4 (31:56):
That's also animal abuse. They know that's animal that's animal abuse, right.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
I don't know. It dries up in a week, I guess, dude.
Speaker 3 (32:03):
I read some wild shit online.
Speaker 2 (32:05):
Nice are you reading it right now?
Speaker 3 (32:08):
Yeah? About the celebrity couples and like the weird ship
that they do what and that they admit publicly. I'm like,
hold on, it's just crazy, how like weird? Something like
machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox are they together? They
were together? They talked about how they just would drink
each other's blood and it brought them closer to each other.
Speaker 4 (32:28):
Nobody help me?
Speaker 2 (32:30):
Yeah, I mean it would wouldn't it better? I don't
know how it couldn't, to be honest. Yeah, how much
closer can you get if I'm drinking someone else's blood? Blake,
If we're drinking each other's blood, we're closer.
Speaker 4 (32:41):
You know I have a dog. Yeah, you know I
have a dog.
Speaker 3 (32:43):
At that point, I'm like, we might know you have
a dog if you're a drinking my blood? You know
I have a dog.
Speaker 2 (32:52):
And is there another example?
Speaker 4 (32:53):
Yeah, because that's nothing.
Speaker 2 (32:54):
I'm trying to move on from this ripe insanity.
Speaker 4 (32:58):
That's pretty insane.
Speaker 3 (32:59):
Well, and Meghan Trainer and her husband Darryl Sabara Darryl Yeah,
Daryl Brow Sabara, I don't know, mister Barro like the
pizza the pizza guy, I don't know. They they talked
about how they bought toilets. They have two toilets installed
next to each other so they can ship next.
Speaker 4 (33:20):
To each other.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
That's like an Snels guy.
Speaker 3 (33:24):
And then she goes, he'll hang out with me when
I poop and I just can't take his poops?
Speaker 2 (33:31):
What does that mean?
Speaker 4 (33:31):
Diarrhea?
Speaker 3 (33:33):
Like, man, poops are different or a different fucking level,
But my poops don't smell.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
What website are you wanting? Dude?
Speaker 3 (33:39):
This is just Twitter. This is just like a feed
of like crazy shit that celebrities have said before.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
I do like how Adam comes in here with stuff
to talk about because I'm like, I'm winging it.
Speaker 3 (33:50):
No, I know, I'm usually winging it too. I just
was looking at this right before getting on. I'm like,
this is fucking wild ship.
Speaker 2 (33:56):
They take poops next to each other.
Speaker 5 (33:59):
That's bizarre.
Speaker 4 (34:00):
Yeah, dude, why the hell.
Speaker 3 (34:02):
I'm also like, if you're rich enough to have two
toilets installed in your bathroom, like my bathroom, every space
is used for a thing. There's not a ton of
extra room for a full other toilet, you know.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
What I mean.
Speaker 4 (34:13):
Yeah, but that's also there's something kind of like romantic
in sweet about that.
Speaker 3 (34:17):
It's not zero zero percent?
Speaker 2 (34:19):
Is that what you would start in your culture, in
your village, that people have to poop next to their
wife or husband?
Speaker 4 (34:24):
Yeah? I don't. I mean, that's not the worst thing
I've ever heard, Like, like to not want to be
like separated from your loved one you love them so much.
You don't. You know, you don't want to let them
out of your sight.
Speaker 3 (34:35):
That that's codependency and that is dangerous.
Speaker 4 (34:38):
Dude. You yeah, is that bad?
Speaker 5 (34:40):
Yeah, that's not a good thing.
Speaker 2 (34:43):
I think that's the last thing I want to do together,
Like I'll do I'll do just about everything else together
and then last pooping together.
Speaker 3 (34:53):
I'm like, I don't want to shit on a toilet
next to you.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
Like if she has the flu and she's barfing, I'll
hold the hair. I'm in there.
Speaker 3 (35:00):
Yeah, that's fine, either you have diarrhea or you don't.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
I wouldn't mind being I don't want to be there,
but I want to be helpful. No, okay, But if
it's a just hey, you gotta Yeah, those wings are
hitting let's head upstairs.
Speaker 4 (35:11):
Maybe what if like this this happens later in the relationship,
you're already liked.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Ter than it's been forty thousand years.
Speaker 4 (35:19):
Yeah, right, Well, like it's like I no longer can
shit unassisted? Will you please hold my hand while I shit?
It's like very important to me. I can't unassisted shit assisted.
Speaker 2 (35:29):
What you're talking about isn't real.
Speaker 4 (35:31):
But what if it happened? What if like it could
happen like I'm incontinent. What does that mean? You can't
hold your ship.
Speaker 2 (35:39):
Like I can't hold my shit in like I gotta
wear diapers?
Speaker 4 (35:41):
No, no, you you you're you're stopped.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
You.
Speaker 4 (35:44):
You can't shit unless somebody's real.
Speaker 2 (35:47):
That's not a real thing.
Speaker 3 (35:48):
How maybe it is, but it isn't blake. You can't
shit unless someone's holding your hand. Yeah, like I could see, Well,
then you have mental problems. And then I think you
need to see a doctor.
Speaker 2 (35:57):
Yeah, yes, I'm saying this like something like like it's
not real. I haven't even seen this on like a
tail from the fucking dark Side episode, Like, yeah, come on.
Speaker 5 (36:06):
You're not watching old episodes.
Speaker 3 (36:07):
Man. Maybe Jada Pickett Smith, who can we just say?
Is she's kooky, she's cooky, right, she's a little wild child.
Speaker 4 (36:22):
Hot hot, hot hot.
Speaker 3 (36:23):
Her grandmother taught her how to masturbate her when she
was nine years old. Taught her how taught her how
to masturbate. Oh, my grandmother taught me how about self
pleasuring because she wanted me to know that the pleasure
was coming from me.
Speaker 2 (36:38):
Right now, Well, feminism is a complicated pond. I don't
want to dip my toe into.
Speaker 4 (36:47):
Yeah, I refuse, No, I mean that could be that,
Like that doesn't necessarily mean like this was like a demonstration,
but perhaps this was a conversation.
Speaker 5 (36:57):
She had with her like it's okay to have that conversation, right.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
Let me tell you something, Blake. Yeah, I'm just trying
to imagine my grandfather yeah being like do you get
erections anders and me being like, uh yeah, just started
getting those. Why what's up.
Speaker 4 (37:22):
Stroking that?
Speaker 2 (37:23):
Like, no, dude, what no?
Speaker 4 (37:26):
Why not that? I mean, why not? That could be
a healthy conversation for somebody to have with someone.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
Everything can be in a healthy everything can be a
conversation that's healthy. Ain't no way this.
Speaker 3 (37:38):
Was you can't be what But then you look out
she turned out exactly yes, absolutely all her fucking rocker,
a lunatic, a crazy person. Okay, so then that all
of her business needs to be out there in the streets, right,
So yeah, I thought it might have had a negative
this one Lea Michelle and her friend Jonathan Groff.
Speaker 2 (38:01):
Look at this.
Speaker 4 (38:04):
Spill a du weekly.
Speaker 3 (38:07):
I think he's a gay man. I'm pretty sure he's
a gay man. Okay, what he said he had never
seen a vagina before her husband. No, her best friend
got best friend forever, Jonathan Groff. He's a gay guy,
I believe. She he had never seen a vagina, so
she took a desk lamp and it spread eagle and
(38:31):
showed him the all the lips and layers.
Speaker 4 (38:36):
That's a great friend.
Speaker 2 (38:37):
So here's my whole thing. Leah Michelle, who also don't know.
Speaker 3 (38:41):
Her really really or at all.
Speaker 2 (38:44):
I mean like I don't know her personally or even
like professionally. Really.
Speaker 4 (38:49):
I want to be on you.
Speaker 2 (38:50):
Why are you doing this? You don't what are you doing?
There is the internet, there is old gas stations where
Adam had his life to why are you up on
a table with a desk lamp? What are you getting
out of this? And are you available for parties?
Speaker 4 (39:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (39:09):
That's kind of You're you're kind of a fucking mind.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
I'm kind of just like where does this start and end?
Speaker 3 (39:15):
I kind of think that's a cool chick. But that's
also like about how gay is he? Because was you know?
Because I feel like as like a long ploy, like
he's really working every angle.
Speaker 2 (39:24):
He's a Broadway actors super gay.
Speaker 4 (39:28):
He's a super gay.
Speaker 5 (39:29):
I don't know about that.
Speaker 3 (39:31):
Yeah, like there's not one straight man that does properly.
Speaker 5 (39:34):
Yeah, well I was. I was a theater majors though.
Speaker 2 (39:36):
Yeah, no, he's pretty good. That's right.
Speaker 3 (39:38):
You have a dog named Pickles you've never admitted to
so so there's you have some deep secrets and the name.
Speaker 4 (39:43):
Gets some deep secret.
Speaker 2 (39:45):
You know what's funny? Jonathan Groff, he's not somebody who's
what would be common classified long ago. It's like flaming
right whatever. But I remember watching him a scripture. You
don't hear it anymore, but I missed that, but we
all know what it used to mean and the and
the weight that it carried after this. But when he
was on Goofy, that really good serial killer show, and
(40:09):
he was straight on that, yeah, I was like, but
you're not.
Speaker 3 (40:13):
What show was that? That was the David Fincher show,
like the body Hunter, mind Hunter, mind Hunter, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:21):
Ah that but he was straight on that, and I
was like, or not like you just yeah kind of
you're like, you know, it's like when you watch Borgahawks
episodes and you're like, oh, durs is like a straight guy.
I know's yeah, okay, you know.
Speaker 3 (40:35):
Right, and dude, imagine this. Imagine so Olivia Wild once
said about her sex life with her ex husband, look
at him, go dude, I mean, it's a whole thread.
I just I read this just three minutes before before
coming on. She said. Imagine if you're this is what blake,
you have an ex wife. Imagine your ex wife said
(40:58):
this why in the news about you? So she's talking
to a reporter about this. Imagine she said this about you.
I felt like my vagina died. It turned off lights out.
You can lie to your relatives at Christmas dinner and
(41:18):
tell them everything on the home front is just perfect,
but you cannot lie to your vagina. She added later,
sometimes your vagina dies, then you know it's time to go.
Speaker 2 (41:30):
I don't disagree. And look, as I say this, I
understand what this podcast is for us, But you don't
have to say everything. Yeah, I mean, what is going
on where people put a mic in your face and
you're like, tell my secrets?
Speaker 4 (41:47):
Yeah, the honesty is not required the TMI. It's okay
to to have some You can hide a dog well.
Speaker 3 (41:53):
And also like I get that, like she's no longer
married to this man, and maybe there is some animosity
there and probably you don't like him. Or or whatever reason.
There's some there's some hate there. But to say that
your vagina died, that's that's just a bad look.
Speaker 2 (42:15):
For her where you're like, you really got to go
out of your way. That bad for this no name dude.
He was just chilling on the couch right now and
now Adam Devine's reading a show.
Speaker 5 (42:25):
I feel for this guy.
Speaker 3 (42:26):
I mean, I don't know this poor guy. I mean,
I'm looking at this guy. I mean he hot. I
wouldn't say he's hot, but he's a regular looking guy.
But he's wearing a Fedora, so he already.
Speaker 4 (42:41):
Already My vagina would my vagina would die right there.
It died at the Fedora. Brother, you can't have.
Speaker 2 (42:48):
To wait, we're saying the vagina. He didn't kill the pussy.
Speaker 3 (42:52):
No no, no, no, no, he didn't kill the vagina died
just when it looked at his dick.
Speaker 4 (42:57):
Of natural causes. Fedora related, that's rough. Can can you
imagine I can imagine that.
Speaker 2 (43:04):
Cool, cool, cool thing to put on wast.
Speaker 4 (43:06):
Yeah, to kind of lit him up. I like.
Speaker 3 (43:08):
She also said about then partner Jason Sadek revived, he
revived and they had like a weird falling out too.
Who is this, Olivia Wilde.
Speaker 2 (43:19):
Wild I was thinking a mom the whole time.
Speaker 4 (43:21):
No, Olivia wild So.
Speaker 3 (43:22):
Olivia Wilde then said about uh then partner Jason sideikis
that that they're having sex like a Kenyon like Kenyan
marathon runners. So just I guess that's for a long time.
This the stamina, Okay?
Speaker 2 (43:36):
Is that good?
Speaker 4 (43:37):
Yeah? Pen, they they are having sector a very very
long time.
Speaker 3 (43:45):
That's actually kind of tired. I wouldn't mind.
Speaker 4 (43:47):
I'm hearing that women don't really like having sex very
long anymore. That's the new thing I'm hearing.
Speaker 3 (43:53):
I'm here.
Speaker 4 (43:53):
Yeah, I'm hearing, bro just open up, just be cool.
From gall pals.
Speaker 3 (44:01):
Here, they kind of want to.
Speaker 4 (44:02):
They want to kind of get it. They want to
get it done with.
Speaker 5 (44:05):
They don't really want I think that's.
Speaker 3 (44:07):
Your girl going like, wrap it up, dude, what are
you doing?
Speaker 4 (44:09):
Yeah? Oh man, I'm hearing from I'm hearing from several
my gal pals that they aren't looking for a long time.
They're just looking for a good time, all right. And
these marathon guys, yeah, you got it. You got to
wrap it up.
Speaker 3 (44:22):
But sometimes you you know, you like to, you know,
spend your time you know, the stamina, keep it at
good pace.
Speaker 5 (44:30):
What's the mac like fifteen minutes?
Speaker 4 (44:32):
Come on?
Speaker 3 (44:33):
Come on?
Speaker 2 (44:34):
Yeah, what are you trying to do? I mean, I
guess it's just a minute mark. You're switching things up.
Speaker 4 (44:40):
You're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (44:43):
I mean, I'm not there anymore.
Speaker 2 (44:44):
Also, at this time, at this point, days are long.
Days are long, days are long.
Speaker 3 (44:49):
Yeah, I'm not there anymore. My back hurts too much.
I usually just give up about five minutes in and
be like, I'm good, I'm good. Your turn my back.
My back's killing me, I say, I you go. Oh
Jessica Simpson, uh uh what is this?
Speaker 2 (45:07):
Is this an article or a website or is it
a realistical.
Speaker 3 (45:09):
No, it's just you know how they have threads on
different shiit on on Twitter, where like a person just
like breaks down like a topic.
Speaker 2 (45:15):
I haven't been on Twitter and forever.
Speaker 4 (45:16):
Oh yeah, yeah I've been.
Speaker 3 (45:18):
It's toxic.
Speaker 4 (45:20):
Pretty cool, I've been trying.
Speaker 3 (45:21):
Well, it's just so remember how you used to say
about Jessica Simpson ers bodies No that you used to say,
like you don't find her sexy because it looks like
she would fart in front of you.
Speaker 2 (45:35):
Ah, that sounds like something I would definitely say.
Speaker 3 (45:38):
Yeah, you guys, I remember you saying like you think
Carrie Underwood would keep it together and she's very sexy,
but you don't get Jessica Simpson because it looks like
she would fart in front of you and a little
dudoo would pop up.
Speaker 2 (45:52):
Do you. I don't know what the dodo, but I do.
I can. I can see her farting and then like
laughing about it and me being like, but you keep
doing it.
Speaker 3 (46:01):
Yeah, I've asked you, Yeah, you have a gas but
that was on my leg, don't Well, she had a.
Speaker 4 (46:07):
Reality show, didn't she like do a lot of farting
on that reality show?
Speaker 3 (46:11):
I don't know if she did or not.
Speaker 2 (46:12):
Maybe I think that was it. It was just a
lot of like eating with her bare hands. I don't know, go.
Speaker 4 (46:16):
Ahead, yeah I think it was.
Speaker 6 (46:17):
So.
Speaker 3 (46:17):
She said at one point, I guess on Ellen that
she only brushes her teeth maybe three times a week.
Speaker 2 (46:26):
As someone who brushes only once a day.
Speaker 4 (46:29):
Not okay, not okay, Yeah, yeah that is great, that
is crazy.
Speaker 3 (46:33):
But because she doesn't want them to feel too slippery,
which is and she needs a little Coatine coatin, A
little coatin, Yeah, a coatine. No, a little coatin, you
might be off the coadeine. Instead of brushing every day,
she uses a shirt or something to wipe her teeth.
(46:53):
Oh yeah, like she is an So when I read this,
I was like, oh, was absolutely right. Not only is
she farting in front of you all the time.
Speaker 4 (47:03):
She's brushed her teeth with her.
Speaker 3 (47:04):
Shirt, she's brushing her teeth with her shirt.
Speaker 2 (47:06):
Oh bro, if her teeth are that dirty, booty hole
has to be disregarded, complete disregard for the butt.
Speaker 3 (47:15):
Of Absolutely, if you can't honor the sanctity of your
own mouth, your booty hole is a fucking graveyard.
Speaker 4 (47:23):
Oh no, detail, white dude, it was damn there's all
kinds of ship back there. Literally, that's crazy.
Speaker 2 (47:33):
It's too bad too. It's too bad.
Speaker 4 (47:35):
I thought maybe maybe it was like to protect her voice,
like in like toothpaste damages your vocal cords or something.
Speaker 2 (47:40):
But she just like, you're such a good person that
I think it's getting in the way of your success.
And and I don't mean like professionally, I mean like
we're done professionally made happiness. Like I think you'd be
a happier person if if you took away the ben
a fit of the doubt from almost everyone, Why.
Speaker 3 (48:03):
What's going on? Did what did Blake just say?
Speaker 2 (48:06):
He like rationalized, He was like, well, maybe if if
it helps her singing.
Speaker 4 (48:11):
That maybe maybe she wasn't brushing her teeth because like yeah,
like cause you know, like vocalists, they tend to like
have like be very careful with their vocal cords. Maybe
the mint of the toothpaste is damaging or something, but
she just doesn't like her teeth feeling slippery.
Speaker 2 (48:28):
That's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 3 (48:29):
Yeah, so this this thread is I mean, it's it's wild, dude.
Uh Madonna, I mean the Madonna one. You're like, yeah,
she's a fucking weirdo. He's on record. He was so
cool though. She goes, it's really good to drink urine
after you've got out of a frozen bath.
Speaker 4 (48:48):
I don't understand.
Speaker 2 (48:50):
I wouldn't know any better. I don't know. I've never
been in either a frozen bath or tried to peep.
Speaker 4 (48:56):
That is a about there is there's a movement of
people who are drinking urine. Now you see the guy
on Instagram all the time. They're claiming it has benefit.
Speaker 2 (49:06):
Yeah, if you're thirsty.
Speaker 3 (49:10):
Waking of dehydration.
Speaker 4 (49:12):
But I don't even think like because when you're like
out in the desert stranded, if you drink your urine,
it doesn't it doesn't not dehydrate.
Speaker 2 (49:20):
I think after a while, I think once, because your
body keeps processing it. But like you pee out water
at well, yeah, but then after you keep drinking that
and you don't have much to pee out, and that's
yellow as as a motherfucker.
Speaker 4 (49:32):
I do remember one of the like survival things was
like you pee in like a hole and then you
put like like if you have like a like what's
the zip lock paper, the plastic wrap, and then the
water Yeah, the water rises out.
Speaker 2 (49:47):
Ye.
Speaker 6 (49:47):
You're like.
Speaker 4 (49:50):
Yeah, and then you drink that. If you're ever stuck
in a desert or something and you have no water,
I'll just drink Adams p Okay, Yeah, I drink I.
Speaker 2 (49:59):
Give you my pe Adam standing sixty nine right at me.
Speaker 3 (50:02):
Damn any tape backs, any apologies, any epic slams.
Speaker 4 (50:06):
Oh I do.
Speaker 2 (50:08):
I'll apologize for going hard at Blake the last couple episodes.
But what it is for me, thank you is an
absolute pleasure. Yeah, No, it's just fun to learn about
you then have a dog is I think people listening
will be like, what what?
Speaker 3 (50:29):
Ye never brought it up, never mentioned the fact that
this animal lives with him. I feel like we've talked
about everything that you could talk about with one another,
and the fact that you have this animal.
Speaker 4 (50:42):
That your home.
Speaker 3 (50:43):
I I and there's wasn't one story about like a
ship on something, or you slipped on some shit, or
you took you took the dog out for a walk
and some shit funny or crazy happened.
Speaker 4 (50:55):
Right, No, not really.
Speaker 2 (50:57):
Does nothing funny or crazy happen with that dog?
Speaker 4 (51:00):
Not not not really. It's pretty just much just like
a pretty chill dog. That's why I never have brought
it up.
Speaker 3 (51:05):
Well, you said it wasn't a chill dog. And the
reason that I've never seen it. I've got over to
your house a couple of times.
Speaker 4 (51:11):
Now, it's chilling the way that it's not a hilarious,
hilarious dog that has a bunch of hilarious stories.
Speaker 2 (51:18):
It doesn't pass the vibe track.
Speaker 4 (51:21):
Yeah, but I apologize for not being more forth right.
Speaker 2 (51:26):
Fourth right, either fourth right or forthcoming.
Speaker 5 (51:32):
Yep, he was gonna come you saw me what you
saw me?
Speaker 2 (51:35):
Wind, I knew. I was like, it's fourth it's fourth
meal or something.
Speaker 3 (51:40):
I was gonna say, forthcoming.
Speaker 4 (51:42):
Well, I apologize for being forthcoming and forth right with
you guys. Also, you know, you apologize about you know,
bullying me, writing me, but then you keep you keep
doing it, so the apology doesn't have a lot of
weight for it because you're you're not changing what your
apologize about.
Speaker 7 (52:03):
All right, this was another episode imported child.
Speaker 3 (52:15):
Oh yeah, but bitch, no, no, no, man,
Welcome to This Is Important, a production of iHeart Radio,
the show where we talk about what's obviously most critically
crucially important today.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
On This is Important, we need to make sure you
gape your buttholes.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
Sometimes your vagina does. Then you know it's time to go.
Speaker 4 (00:22):
But I'm hearing that women don't really like having sex
very long anymore. That's the new thing. Let's go.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Okay already, Heineken zero zero is going down extra smooth
right now.
Speaker 4 (00:46):
I would if I got a big fucking boner.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Right now, figure out how to open it.
Speaker 5 (00:51):
Yeah, well, just get a bottle opener, brother, come on.
Speaker 6 (00:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
I will say they're my favorite out of all the
non alcoholic beers.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
I'm loving this. Yeah, it's not bad.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Have you done a taste test?
Speaker 3 (01:03):
Yeah, I've well, I've tasted a lot of them because
I'm sober Sally right now, so I've I've had quite
a few, and i'd say, uh, I'd say they're one
of their top their top tier for sure.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
I'm a saint Polly's boy.
Speaker 5 (01:17):
Oh are you?
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Oh dude, finally, wait, Blake, can I just ask you
wait what that sound bite did you just drop? Which
I think I was like, Hey, you should put that
on there. That seems like something relevant to us. Did
you just upload that recently or has that been in
the cut.
Speaker 5 (01:35):
I've had it in the cut for a while. It's
from a Drake song.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
Because you're a huge Drake fan.
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Now I'm yes, I have final in the corner. I'm
now a drakesman, big Drake energy.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Yeah. As soon as the Dick video came out, you
were like, he's pretty good. Honestly.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
Oh yeah, we did talk what happened, man, what happened
to Drake?
Speaker 2 (01:59):
We when his wriggle raggle got raggled out.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
We talked about it. Remember he had his he had
his large cock in his hand on like an in
an airplane when he was full masked.
Speaker 5 (02:10):
I kind of talked about it.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
I sort of remember that. Yeah, No, I do.
Speaker 4 (02:15):
Adam has never seen a dick, he remembered. I don't.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
I don't. You had a long penis. Yeah, but you
that's not necessarily the thickest one I've ever seen. And
it kind of tapered off in a way that doesn't
appeal to me.
Speaker 4 (02:27):
But yeah, you you were claiming that he grabbed it
far too close to the base.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
Right based God Yeah, that's it. That's an old trick.
That's it. When you're sending Dick pics. That's an old trick.
Not that I ever have, right but right, but that
that would be my trick.
Speaker 4 (02:42):
I got a big fucking boner right now.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
Okay, But just to just to really close the loop
on this, that's when that Dick video came out. That's
when Blake was like, we gotta unearth some Drake drops.
Speaker 3 (02:57):
Whatever happened to wasn't he beefing with uh with Kendrick Klamar?
Whatever happened to that?
Speaker 2 (03:03):
It's only gotten crazier, and I'm glad we're talking about it. Yes, Uh,
Drake's like suing him for defamation WHOA or his record
label or something.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
Oh yeah, He's like taking down the entire like music
industry to destroy him. He's like claiming that like he
paid for like listens or something to get it or
like like.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
But there was some yeah, yeah, exactly that there was
some like business sorcery to suppress Drake's listens versus uh Kendrick.
Because I guess you can like pay more for Spotify
to like feature you a little bit more, you know,
but like I like how Drake's saying, yeah, I'm suing.
It's basically happening, like this is just what we do.
(03:50):
This is just how business works.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
Yeah, I mean that is bitch made, but but it's
bitch made to sue because you're like, I'm gonna go
and tell my dad, ye know your dad yee.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:03):
It's kind of like when you would play the Homie
at like Super Nintendo and he'd be losing then he
turned the game off.
Speaker 5 (04:08):
It's just not cool, man, just because.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
You're losing that what you would do.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
Yeah, no, man, it's I feel like it's a little
different than that. Well, I could see you being a
little bitch bike about video games.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
Adam, you don't think it's exactly like what Blake just said.
It's been a while, Adam thinks it's a little different.
Speaker 3 (04:23):
No, I think it might be a little different.
Speaker 5 (04:25):
But I never did that.
Speaker 2 (04:26):
But yeah, like, are movies suing other movies because they're
in ten of the theaters of like the of the
like twelve screens or whatever, And you're like, I'm just
the substance. I'm trying to crack in, well, trying to
get some eyeball.
Speaker 5 (04:39):
Maybe they're going to start doing.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
That you can't.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
Well, I wonder, I wonder because is that illegal to do?
You know, if it's illegal to do, then then okay,
then unearth m But I mean, I.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Did not forget Adam's all about legality.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Actually, I'm a legal guy. I'm a legal legalese.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Adam's all about the up and up.
Speaker 3 (04:58):
I'm all about that legalese.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Like a.
Speaker 4 (05:01):
Boy.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
Which is a real word?
Speaker 4 (05:03):
Is this is it the word?
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Blake? We just found out we've known you more than
half of our lives.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Huh, upwards of twenty years?
Speaker 3 (05:13):
Yeah, more than twenty years. And we just found out
that you have a dog.
Speaker 4 (05:21):
Crazy.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
Yeah, you own a dog.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
You're a dog owner.
Speaker 4 (05:24):
Yes, I've had a dog for yeah, close to like,
I don't know, six six seven years.
Speaker 3 (05:30):
Now, you've had a dog for six.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
Or seven six seven years.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
You've never we've talked about dogs all the time. You
never second, you've never mentioned that you have a dog.
That's such a crazy Wait a second? Six seven years?
Speaker 4 (05:43):
Maybe yeah, right around there?
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Maybe hang on, is this a blake Anderson? Six seven years?
Or is this like a legit actual two or three years?
Speaker 4 (05:51):
Well, now I'm trying to calculate how long I've been
with Zam but yeah, ever since you moved.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
So this is a sam dog.
Speaker 4 (05:59):
I didn't you this dog. This dog was bestowed upon me.
It was a package dealmouth rocks exactly, thank you and
uh yeah. So I don't really claim the dog because
I didn't pick the dog. I didn't choose the dog.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
My dog.
Speaker 3 (06:14):
But I seem like you hate this dog. Do you
like this dog? I don't.
Speaker 5 (06:18):
I don't. I don't. I don't love the dog.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Okay, what are we talking? We're talking about? Is this
a rescue? This is a purebread? Is this something I would
approve of?
Speaker 3 (06:27):
So that's why, that's why you don't claim the dog?
Is you you?
Speaker 4 (06:30):
You?
Speaker 3 (06:31):
There's some animosity, to be fair, I love dogs.
Speaker 4 (06:36):
Dogs are rat but I'm not really I'm not a
super pet guy. I'm not really into pet.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Do all dogs go to heaven in your opinion?
Speaker 4 (06:44):
I don't think they do. I don't think this one
is going to heaven. It's kind of a demon dog.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
Is it kind of a dog? Or what's the deal?
Why don't you love this dog?
Speaker 4 (06:53):
It's just a really complex it's a very complex dog.
I don't I don't want to ship talk on this dog.
It's just a case. Damn list is.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
We didn't ask you to ship on the dog. We
just wondered why we had never heard of the dog.
Speaker 3 (07:06):
Yeah, we're just asking some questions about the dog. We
didn't know that this dog existed, the fact that you've
lived this dog has been in your house that you
own for six or seven years.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
I think he said seven or eight years. Oh no,
I don't think it's eight years.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
And by the way, I don't even want to come
at you with this hard like today. I rolled into
this episode being like, I feel like we've been riding
Blake Yeah too hard.
Speaker 4 (07:32):
Guys. You know You've been fucking giving it to me.
I'm getting eyefall towered by you bros. Every week.
Speaker 2 (07:37):
Well that's kind of fun if I can remember to
make an apology later will if I can remember. But
I've been like, whoa, we ride this guy kind of hard,
and today I'm like, let's let's ease off the brakes.
And then I found out you have a dog you've
never talked about.
Speaker 3 (07:51):
The only reason we ride this guy hard is because
it's it's stuff like this. It's stuff exactly like this
docky where he'll just casually drop that he owns a
dog that has lives with him for six seven years.
We talk about dogs kind of often. I'd say, it's
a topic that comes up on the on the podcast.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
It's a dog heavy positive dog.
Speaker 4 (08:11):
It is pretty I know and I and I have
to really hold my tongue when what kind of dog?
Some kind of like poot, it's like a poodle something.
It's a little.
Speaker 3 (08:19):
Guy who I see, I see why you don't love it?
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Like a like a mixed breed.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
I believe it has one or yeah, like two two
breeds to it.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
That's a mix.
Speaker 4 (08:28):
Yeah, okay, that's a mix. That's a poodle.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
Do you walk this dog? Ever?
Speaker 4 (08:33):
I have I have?
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Do you have to?
Speaker 2 (08:36):
I mean?
Speaker 3 (08:37):
What size ships does this dog ship?
Speaker 4 (08:39):
Very little, very tiny ships are It's a it's a
small dog. It's just and it doesn't shed?
Speaker 3 (08:44):
Does it shed?
Speaker 4 (08:46):
No?
Speaker 2 (08:46):
No?
Speaker 3 (08:47):
Well, what's not to like about this dog?
Speaker 4 (08:49):
Just kind of mean? Little mean?
Speaker 5 (08:50):
Is the little nippy?
Speaker 2 (08:51):
Is it in charge?
Speaker 4 (08:52):
I know? But you know what, she has some real
fight to her. I appreciate charge in charge. It's not
in charge. I've tried to check this dog before and
she doesn't back down.
Speaker 5 (09:07):
She's very feisty, and I like the.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
Whole thing is you are not supposed to back down.
They don't back down until you don't back down. Have
you seen Caesar MYLM have this dude just lets dogs
bite them and then looks at them like this doesn't hurt. Yeah,
even though you know he's in pain.
Speaker 3 (09:24):
Who is that? Is that the Dog Whisperer?
Speaker 4 (09:26):
Yes, which that show is great, Like he takes down
some really scary little dog, but he gets bitten.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
He does, and then just doesn't act like it. Yeah,
and then the dog is like like what the fuck?
Why isn't so you need to fight this dog? A
lah Carrie Bucy surviving the game speech okay, okay, fair enough.
I don't know, should be a whole SoundBite in its own,
just hit.
Speaker 5 (09:53):
Play, we could pull it up.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
So Blake dropped that bomb on us where it's almost
so friendship betrayal that we didn't know yet a dog
as I was pretty but I felt betrayed there. Okay,
but then also he dropped a little bit of a
bomb that he was saying that he wants to get
his butthole fingered.
Speaker 4 (10:13):
We're the three best friends.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
Right before you jumped on the podcast.
Speaker 4 (10:19):
I didn't say I want to get my butthole finger.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
Before I got on, before you got on, because we
were waiting a little bit for you.
Speaker 4 (10:25):
You're stuck in traffic or whatever.
Speaker 2 (10:26):
I was, yeah, I'm sorry about that.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
Yeah, And so we're waiting just kind of in the
zoom lobby, just chilling, and Blake kind of out of
nowhere said that he wants to get his butthole fingered.
Please explain loose butthole.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
Well, you can do that. You don't even have to wait.
Speaker 4 (10:43):
I'm aware that I wasn't saying I want to get
my butthole fingered. I just said I've been thinking I
need to get checked for all the butthole diseases.
Speaker 3 (10:54):
Where they yeah, you know that the doctors say it's
for it used to be fifty Carently, Isaac was He's
say it's fifty. They don't figure buttle into your fifty,
right right, getting radical, And we think that maybe the
doctor looked at his butthole and was like, nah, good good,
I'm coming back. I want to kick this can down
the road. I'm back because my doctor told me forty five.
(11:17):
So I've been hearing it's younger. I've been hearing you
should go in at forty to get your get your
prostate colon?
Speaker 4 (11:25):
Yeah, what is it?
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Ros state checked? Yeah, colon for colon cancer something.
Speaker 4 (11:29):
But like why not, like why why not just get
a checked? Like why do they always say like you
just wait, yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
Get it go in there twenty thirty Yeah, times a week.
Speaker 3 (11:40):
Yeah, yeah, you're not wrong, but why why is there?
Does this disease run in your family or.
Speaker 4 (11:45):
No, not that I'm aware of, okay, yeah, but.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
Is it a disease?
Speaker 3 (11:50):
What is like cancer?
Speaker 4 (11:52):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Yeah, yeah, I don't know like the terminology like colon science.
I think cancer is a disease.
Speaker 4 (11:58):
I believe virus.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
H Dude. I just got all the test results back
from my physical and just came the doctor called me
and you know when they call you.
Speaker 4 (12:08):
That's like, oh shit, what was that?
Speaker 2 (12:09):
Right?
Speaker 3 (12:10):
They told me that I have It's not crazy, but
it's something I should watch high cholesterol and yeah yeah,
and they they said that I should uh work out
more and lift weights what And I'm like, dude, that's
all I do?
Speaker 2 (12:28):
Yeah? Do you listen to my world famous podcast?
Speaker 3 (12:32):
I'm like, it's all I do. If I lifted in
my wife would leave me if I was in the
gym or at physical therapy.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
More often a moment longer.
Speaker 4 (12:40):
Huh yeah, So.
Speaker 3 (12:42):
She begs her packed did.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
You tell them you eat an entire chicken a night.
Speaker 3 (12:47):
I've slowed down on the chicken. I've so down on
the chicken, and I've so down on the red meat too,
And I heard that's what really does it? So I
don't know what it is. And also they told me
that I should watch my drinking because I have an
enlarged liver.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
Whoa, So you know this is news to you somehow? Yeah, news,
This is not news to anyone listening.
Speaker 4 (13:08):
Fuck it.
Speaker 3 (13:09):
Sure, I bet it's a little enlarged. And they said
it wasn't anything crazy, but you know, watch your drinking
in large liver.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Dude, you should have been like, have you have you
ever seen a bigger one?
Speaker 5 (13:19):
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Larger is better, right.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
Yeah, Well, the bummers. I didn't get to talk to
the doctor. He left a voicemail with all this on it,
so I was like, oh shit, ah damn it.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
That doesn't seem kosher.
Speaker 4 (13:29):
Yeah yeah, huh oh you did.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
And I'm questioning who has the most in large liver
and maybe we could all go to the doctor before
the next live show get these results, right.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
Yes, we've talked about doing something like this, measure the tea.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
Yeah, talk about let's go tea.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
Yeah, let's get a physical from the base. Yeah everything.
Speaker 4 (13:51):
What if we even like go behind a curtain and
then like you know, they do one of those cool
tubes that they put like down your throat and stuff.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
You wish it's cool, bro, we go behind a curtain,
so they put them in down our throats?
Speaker 3 (14:05):
Yeah, do we need a curtain for this? You could
do that on stage? Dude, you don't know.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
How about we go behind a curtain for the prostate exam?
Speaker 3 (14:13):
I thought you meant like you put your head through
the curtain and the asses behind the curtain and then
he checks your ass back there.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
But you're this is Adam's favorite porto category.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
But yeah, go ahead, we could do that too. Anything
could happen behind.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
That had a category. That category had a run for
about four years. It was just like a woman at
a lemonade stand on a boardwalk getting sucked from behind
the curtain, going.
Speaker 4 (14:37):
On, Oh do you want to those are pretty cool?
Speaker 3 (14:42):
It's only sixty nine, say yeah, right, oh yeah, oh yeah,
those are really good.
Speaker 4 (14:49):
Those are The acting is always really phenomenal, and the people.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Ordering the lemonade are like somebody a block away goes,
will you go order lemonade over there? Like all right,
the per twenty bucks act normal.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
I feel like the pornos galacting in pornos have really
gotten it's slowed down. I feel like when we when
we were in our peak, when we were in our
peak porno watching eras sure, sure October, you guys might
still be.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Halloween every year ago ahead.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
I feel I feel there was there was production value
in the pornos and it was it was absolutely and
more of an event because they were selling the DVDs,
they were selling the VHS's yes, for the for the
Dad Gone.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
There was a fork in the road.
Speaker 4 (15:39):
There was a fork in the road.
Speaker 2 (15:41):
And we all know remember when they spent like I
don't know, I think it was like a million dollars
or something crazy, ten million dollars on the Pirate one
Pirate of the Caribbean. Yes, and it was like it
was like this is the future. And then it was
absolutely the opposite of yeah, where they're like, no, you
(16:01):
have a van, we're gonna pick up a woman and
throw her out of the van. Actually that's the new style. Yeah,
And it was like, well, I'm not asking for that either.
If I could just get a middle of the road
where there's a little bit of set design and no
one's getting thrown out of a van.
Speaker 4 (16:16):
Yeah, we're good to go.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
Yeah, what was the throwing out of the van? I
wish they I mean, we did a whole sketch a
b we did this about how like we did a
bang Bus sketch way back in the day, and that
was when we first harnessed the power of the internet
because it went mildly viral, very moderately viral, and then
bang Bus sent us a lot of free merch.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Great, and they were pioneers.
Speaker 3 (16:42):
They were pioneers, which we were very excited about. We
were all in our early twenties. It was very excited.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
But if I could give them one note, it's the
idea of like driving around and then a woman's like, yeah,
fuck me and this van very cool, hot hot, hot hot.
But then when you're like throw them out of the van,
they're standing in the corner with their clothes. You're like, yeah, dude, what, Yeah,
that's not why are you doing that? You just what?
Speaker 3 (17:08):
Yeah? You know. The the cooler thing would have been
they found their wife getting married. Yeah yeah, they're like wow,
I would like they actually drive to that white chapel
in Vegas and they're.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
Just like, well, the drivers a priest.
Speaker 3 (17:23):
That's cool.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
Yeah, you know, Oh I didn't know.
Speaker 3 (17:26):
As they're doing it doggy style, he's he's, you know,
doing the sermon.
Speaker 4 (17:31):
Yeah, he's like, you may now kiss the bride.
Speaker 2 (17:34):
They step on like the glass and they say him
and they're like, yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
Oh they're Jewish and I assume they could be. Sure,
could we assume they could be?
Speaker 4 (17:44):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (17:45):
Black?
Speaker 5 (17:45):
White?
Speaker 2 (17:50):
But I just was always I was always bummed out
that I was part of I mean, look, the whole
dark thing.
Speaker 3 (17:55):
But like you weren't.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
They're kicking them out of the van. You're like, guys, it's.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
Not Wait, is are you admitting to something publicly? You
are part of it? Why do you keep saying you were.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
Part Yeah, you're partaking, You're you're partaking?
Speaker 4 (18:07):
You are you are?
Speaker 2 (18:08):
I mean I'm not. Look, Kyle's not here to go
on about the dark deep corners of porno.
Speaker 3 (18:15):
Kyle Kyle knows better more than any of us.
Speaker 5 (18:18):
Yeah, he did work in it a little bit.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Well, look I'm I'm clicking. I'm clicking, and you know,
I'm seeing the ads for uh load booz.
Speaker 4 (18:26):
Absolutely, and we.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
Could circle back to that.
Speaker 3 (18:28):
But I feel like our podcast is definitely porn adjacent.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
I feel like, sure they aren't.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
We not in the industry, but.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
Everyone's a little bit of a whore.
Speaker 4 (18:44):
When's the last time you guys dusted off like an
old vintage porn because those are those are awesome, like
seventies pornos.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
No you can, I just okay, so just real quick,
like dust it off or like typed in retro.
Speaker 4 (18:59):
Yeah, sure, yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Once a year I type in retro dust it off?
No you wait?
Speaker 3 (19:04):
And also neither And also I'm saying, buy a vh
a VHS player, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (19:12):
A VCR put in like an old tape from underneath,
like your dad's bed, and like let it ride.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Blake, you're famous, you know that, right?
Speaker 5 (19:21):
Why what does that have to do with anything?
Speaker 2 (19:23):
Where are you going to these places where you need
to dust off tapes? You know that they go? Well,
Blake Anderson is here here, I'm gonna text everyone I
know tweet about it. Uh here again tm G Sizzle
will be outside when he's here for the third time today.
Speaker 3 (19:40):
Yeah, I mean, do those places still exist. I haven't
gone on a road trip in so long.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
They do because of relationships, you know, where people are like, sure, Todd,
how are you good? Did you guys get my videos in?
You know that we did?
Speaker 7 (19:54):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (19:55):
Sure, yeah we got. They don't want to let down
the local community.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
It's a community.
Speaker 4 (19:59):
Yeah, wow, that's true. I could feel that Janet died.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Well, it was for a while because we when we
would go to that hunting trip. There we go, there
was no sultzer, so no internet out there. For the
longest time, it was very hard to get it was
super it was super spotty.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
And to make your own pornos, I get it.
Speaker 4 (20:21):
And you couldn't watch the pornos. Sure that sucks.
Speaker 3 (20:23):
But in the last five or six years, suddenly lightning
lightning speed. Now all those rural areas are now able
to get their pornos. So the little porn barn down
the way.
Speaker 4 (20:36):
Extinct it Oh yeah, extinct.
Speaker 3 (20:39):
It's it's mad dusty. You'd have to dust everything off.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
Yeah, type in retro.
Speaker 3 (20:44):
It is too bad.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
Yeah, it's a bummer. I mean, this is like those
someone just got like a starlink to a village and
the village got porno or they got phones or something,
and then within like two weeks, the entire village of
the dudes in the village were all just walking around
watching porno. Yeah, like all that.
Speaker 4 (21:04):
Oh yeah, isn't that just like kind.
Speaker 3 (21:07):
Of like a yep telling Yeah, it's like a yuh huh. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
Man, that's the biggest yuh huh I've ever heard in
my life.
Speaker 3 (21:15):
Imagine you live in a village.
Speaker 4 (21:19):
Eyes, I'm there.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
Now, You've never seen any other women but the women
in your village, and you're related to a lot of them.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
I'm dressed as a construction worker, different village, not the
village people.
Speaker 6 (21:31):
Different on now, come on, I'm a biker in assless
leather chaps, differently different, and you've never seen anyone outside
of this village.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
Suddenly you can see every woman, imaginable, every color and creed,
all walks, I mean.
Speaker 4 (21:56):
Shows absolutely, and you can see and there there work
had a lemonade stand and.
Speaker 3 (22:02):
I remember the first I mean, it's I'm sure just
shocks would shock them.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
You've got the floor, Adam, You've got the floor.
Speaker 4 (22:09):
You're getting emotional, and you're getting.
Speaker 3 (22:11):
The first time I remember seeing a naked woman.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Adam picked up the microphone.
Speaker 5 (22:16):
He's holding his heart.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
Yeah, the first time I remember seeing a naked woman.
I opened it.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
What was your mom doing?
Speaker 3 (22:23):
It wasn't my mom. It wasn't my mom. First time outside,
I'm sure I saw my mom. But outside of my mom,
she had no last see an impact. And I was
waiting for my mom to pay for something, and I
there was a porno rack right here. It was a
shitty gas station and I'm standing there. Yeah, and I
(22:43):
grabbed him back. So your mom was there, Yeah, my
mom was right there. I didn't know what I was grabbing.
I just gobbed a magazine and I opened it. There
was a woman and she was holding her tit. She
had like a big, big tit and she had him
like cropped up on her arm like this, and they're
flopped over.
Speaker 5 (23:02):
Sh like a like a falconer.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
Yes, she was resting her tits on her arm like
much like a falcon ghost face killing And yeah, okay,
it's just the way stopped me dead in my tracks.
Like I had a hard time breathing. I was so
excited like, and I was young. I probably was seven
or eight, monster, I was like a little kid, and.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
It just the possibilities of the world have just shattered, shifted,
completely annihilated your reality.
Speaker 3 (23:27):
Oh my god, your boots are huge. I could honestly
cry thinking about it. That's wild.
Speaker 2 (23:32):
Yeah, I think that that answers almost everything.
Speaker 5 (23:35):
But yeah, about your entire career.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
Yeah, I mean if that makes you missed it, I go,
uh huh, wow, that's another.
Speaker 3 (23:44):
It was beautiful, dude, it was beautiful. The female body
is absolutely falconer, absolutely incredible and hot hot. I'm excited
for these villagers to get to send it, to get
to see it for the.
Speaker 4 (23:57):
First Send it in a real way, in a real way.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
And do you think there's in any way you just
trying to recreate Have you been falconing?
Speaker 3 (24:07):
Well, I tell you what, the women in this village
probably aren't walking around their tit with their tits like
their falconers, or doing all the crazy stuff that they
do in these magazines and now on the internet. I
bet they're not doing that. I bet they're not doing that.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
Yeah, there's no way, there's no way. There's no way
you ever type in retro.
Speaker 5 (24:25):
It's really good, don't you ever.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
But they say like a lot of this like moral
is like kind of it's rotting the mind.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
They say, they say that they I'll say it, it's
rotting the mines.
Speaker 3 (24:38):
Yeah, of course, yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't watch it
too much. You can't watch it too much.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
I agree, there's no such thing as watching it too much.
Speaker 4 (24:45):
Now they're going to try to like do like weird
moves in the bedroom, crass.
Speaker 3 (24:52):
You can't, you can't watch you can't watch it too much.
Speaker 4 (24:56):
Next thing, you know, you're at your village. Everybody's trying
to do pile drivers getting.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
Can you imagine? But like do you think in these
villages like they're bored right, Well, no, there's no TV,
so I got to imagine they've already done all this stuff.
Speaker 3 (25:16):
No, no, no, they.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Might be able to teach us a thing or two.
Speaker 3 (25:18):
They have it. They they didn't. They didn't even know
that that stuff was available to them. They did not
even have you ever looked up village porn?
Speaker 2 (25:26):
But what else are they doing?
Speaker 3 (25:27):
They're they're trying to survive unders. There's no boredom because
they're actively trying.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
They've figured out farming. You think they're just tired. At
the end of the day. They don't have the strength
to pile drives.
Speaker 3 (25:37):
They're too tired, dude.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
This is the way, dude.
Speaker 3 (25:39):
Sometimes I'm a forty year old man, I have a
bad back. I have spasms at the end of the day.
Speaker 4 (25:45):
I'm tired, you know, dude. I think and these villagers
who are I think in any past civilization, it's like
noted that like all people lived for was to fuck
each other.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
Well, sure, I don't think they got they get spasms
out there in the village.
Speaker 3 (26:00):
That's not all passive civilizations. That's ancient Rome and Greece.
Speaker 4 (26:05):
I'm saying in places that don't have like because I'm
going to the past, because we're talking about people who
don't have access to internet or television. They they out
of each other constantly. They were doing freaky stuff.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
Well I think in in Yeah, in Greece they did.
They literally would fuck the ship out of each other.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
Literally. Yeah. But just as like Kamasutra, like these books,
these are these are tales as old as time.
Speaker 3 (26:29):
Yeah, and honestly, maybe you're maybe you're right, Kamasusa.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
They didn't have the internet, Yeah, have their imaginations, Adam.
Speaker 3 (26:35):
I imagine these sweet, these sweet village people and they're
not gaping each other's buttholes.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
Why I don't know what.
Speaker 3 (26:43):
Yeah, maybe I don't know.
Speaker 2 (26:45):
But by the way, I think about this all the time.
I'm still I know you.
Speaker 5 (26:49):
I know you're all the time.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
I know you do.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
But no, no, no, but just like here, you're like, they
don't have give them but holes. All it takes is
for one person in charge to be like, and the
women in here, we need to make sure you gape
your buttholes. It's just what we do here. Ye, like,
think about it every every woman in Western.
Speaker 3 (27:10):
War you think about this all the time.
Speaker 4 (27:13):
And that's in order.
Speaker 6 (27:14):
No.
Speaker 2 (27:15):
I think about things that are introduced into cultures that
just become like the status quo.
Speaker 4 (27:20):
Sure sure, yeah, yeah, yeah, the norm, like eating eggs,
like cell phones eat eating eggs, but like shaving pubic care,
like people just are like, who did women shave their
legs in their armpits?
Speaker 2 (27:32):
And they only do that because apparently, like during the
war when we were all gone to sell razors, razor
companies were like, uh, don't tell me you're hairy, be smooth,
shave your legs July or what the fuck? Effort, you know,
and then women were like embarrassed to be hairy.
Speaker 3 (27:49):
Yeah, I would say solid move gellette.
Speaker 2 (27:51):
And that's just like a couple steps away from a
gaping butthole demand.
Speaker 5 (27:55):
Well, what brand is going to ask people to gape there?
Speaker 4 (27:58):
But what would be that?
Speaker 5 (27:59):
There's not a lot of gi do it.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
Why does gap want? Why does big want?
Speaker 4 (28:07):
Once you gape?
Speaker 2 (28:07):
Once you gaped, it's arbitrary. It could be anybody. It
could be Uh, it could be paper mate. It could
be anybody, guys.
Speaker 3 (28:14):
It could be paper mate.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
It could be paper mate, It could be fucking it
could be uniball.
Speaker 3 (28:19):
You know, you're just looking for stuff around you're.
Speaker 4 (28:22):
Yes, let's see, you're really just looking at It could
be sharpie you guys.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
It could be anybody.
Speaker 3 (28:29):
I don't know if it could could be.
Speaker 4 (28:32):
Well maybe maybe.
Speaker 3 (28:33):
Because or like a lipstick company, because you know, like
they might write things on the butt like gape me
like you know, it's a little slogan or something.
Speaker 4 (28:45):
Yes, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (28:46):
I mean it makes more sense than just than just
to say you fucking did staple or whatever the hell
he's talking about.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
Definitely, yeah, but think about like, uh, is it the
you bangis who used to put like the plates and
the stuff in their lips or like the extend their necks.
That was just some dude being like, honey, will you
like put all these things on your neck and make
it longer and then put this plate in your ear
and your lip and then like some dude was like, actually,
it's kind of fly, I'm gonna start doing it. And
(29:15):
then now you've got this entire culture where they've got
plates in their lips, et cetera, and it's hot and
it's popping. Yeah, and uh it just started with some
person going should we do this? Are we doing this?
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Yeah? Or like it's cool that you knew the name
of that village. I think that stop that. But uh
it's also I don't know if it's the name of
the village, but like the culture that the culture people
whatever that was you knew a cool word that I
didn't know, and I was impressed by it.
Speaker 4 (29:44):
Yeah, the job or like when people.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
Used to powder their wigs, like I watched that, Uh
that dumb Franklin we covered the show.
Speaker 4 (29:52):
Yeah, yeah, but that was because they were like yeah
they were they had diseased it. They had like fucking scurvy.
And ship and they looked like shit.
Speaker 2 (29:59):
You guys, SA they stunk and they stunk so bad
they wore smelling good smelling wicks.
Speaker 4 (30:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (30:06):
Yeah, I'm also sort of like, just they had water,
just clean yourself more often.
Speaker 4 (30:13):
But did they have soap? Here comes to lope? Mhmm.
Maybe they didn't have to. I'm assuming they had some
some kind of something.
Speaker 2 (30:20):
All I'm saying is that these things they get introduced
to villages. Next thing, you know, it's status.
Speaker 4 (30:26):
You're fucking in a lemonade.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Stand your next thing, you know, you're fucking eliminade, the
the end, the end point. Next you know, your best
friend has a dog you've never known about. Fucking what?
Speaker 3 (30:42):
Yeah, that's wild.
Speaker 2 (30:45):
Maybe.
Speaker 3 (30:47):
No, By the way, I don't been over to your house.
Speaker 4 (30:50):
Where was this dog like under the stairs?
Speaker 2 (30:54):
What?
Speaker 4 (30:55):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (30:55):
These stairs are like ones that are just floating right.
Speaker 4 (30:59):
Yeah, but the dog can't be really around people when
visitors come over. Still usually put the dog in my
room when visitors are around your Okay, yes.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Okay, I think I mentioned on this podcast about how
I grew up with people who had a monster house,
big house, and well to do family. Hang on, cut
the dog in the basement and they just let it
ship everywhere. Huh Oh, isn't that crazy?
Speaker 4 (31:27):
That is crazy? Like they want't ten to the dog.
That's animal But if you go.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
Down there to like get a case of beer for
your parents out of the refrigerator, and you I stepped
in ship, I remember, and I was like, I stepped
in if your dog pooped, and they're like, yeah, poops
down there, don't go down there, and you gotta look around.
And I was like, no, they didn't.
Speaker 4 (31:47):
They didn't clean it at all.
Speaker 5 (31:48):
They just let the ship a mask.
Speaker 2 (31:50):
They just closed the door. They closed the door.
Speaker 5 (31:52):
Some people is weird.
Speaker 4 (31:53):
Wow, that's weird.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
And they know who they are.
Speaker 4 (31:56):
That's also animal abuse. They know that's animal that's animal abuse, right.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
I don't know. It dries up in a week, I guess, dude.
Speaker 3 (32:03):
I read some wild shit online.
Speaker 2 (32:05):
Nice are you reading it right now?
Speaker 3 (32:08):
Yeah? About the celebrity couples and like the weird ship
that they do what and that they admit publicly. I'm like,
hold on, it's just crazy, how like weird? Something like
machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox are they together? They
were together? They talked about how they just would drink
each other's blood and it brought them closer to each other.
Speaker 4 (32:28):
Nobody help me?
Speaker 2 (32:30):
Yeah, I mean it would wouldn't it better? I don't
know how it couldn't, to be honest. Yeah, how much
closer can you get if I'm drinking someone else's blood? Blake,
If we're drinking each other's blood, we're closer.
Speaker 4 (32:41):
You know I have a dog. Yeah, you know I
have a dog.
Speaker 3 (32:43):
At that point, I'm like, we might know you have
a dog if you're a drinking my blood? You know
I have a dog.
Speaker 2 (32:52):
And is there another example?
Speaker 4 (32:53):
Yeah, because that's nothing.
Speaker 2 (32:54):
I'm trying to move on from this ripe insanity.
Speaker 4 (32:58):
That's pretty insane.
Speaker 3 (32:59):
Well, and Meghan Trainer and her husband Darryl Sabara Darryl Yeah,
Daryl Brow Sabara, I don't know, mister Barro like the
pizza the pizza guy, I don't know. They they talked
about how they bought toilets. They have two toilets installed
next to each other so they can ship next.
Speaker 4 (33:20):
To each other.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
That's like an Snels guy.
Speaker 3 (33:24):
And then she goes, he'll hang out with me when
I poop and I just can't take his poops?
Speaker 2 (33:31):
What does that mean?
Speaker 4 (33:31):
Diarrhea?
Speaker 3 (33:33):
Like, man, poops are different or a different fucking level,
But my poops don't smell.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
What website are you wanting? Dude?
Speaker 3 (33:39):
This is just Twitter. This is just like a feed
of like crazy shit that celebrities have said before.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
I do like how Adam comes in here with stuff
to talk about because I'm like, I'm winging it.
Speaker 3 (33:50):
No, I know, I'm usually winging it too. I just
was looking at this right before getting on. I'm like,
this is fucking wild ship.
Speaker 2 (33:56):
They take poops next to each other.
Speaker 5 (33:59):
That's bizarre.
Speaker 4 (34:00):
Yeah, dude, why the hell.
Speaker 3 (34:02):
I'm also like, if you're rich enough to have two
toilets installed in your bathroom, like my bathroom, every space
is used for a thing. There's not a ton of
extra room for a full other toilet, you know.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
What I mean.
Speaker 4 (34:13):
Yeah, but that's also there's something kind of like romantic
in sweet about that.
Speaker 3 (34:17):
It's not zero zero percent?
Speaker 2 (34:19):
Is that what you would start in your culture, in
your village, that people have to poop next to their
wife or husband?
Speaker 4 (34:24):
Yeah? I don't. I mean, that's not the worst thing
I've ever heard, Like, like to not want to be
like separated from your loved one you love them so much.
You don't. You know, you don't want to let them
out of your sight.
Speaker 3 (34:35):
That that's codependency and that is dangerous.
Speaker 4 (34:38):
Dude. You yeah, is that bad?
Speaker 5 (34:40):
Yeah, that's not a good thing.
Speaker 2 (34:43):
I think that's the last thing I want to do together,
Like I'll do I'll do just about everything else together
and then last pooping together.
Speaker 3 (34:53):
I'm like, I don't want to shit on a toilet
next to you.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
Like if she has the flu and she's barfing, I'll
hold the hair. I'm in there.
Speaker 3 (35:00):
Yeah, that's fine, either you have diarrhea or you don't.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
I wouldn't mind being I don't want to be there,
but I want to be helpful. No, okay, But if
it's a just hey, you gotta Yeah, those wings are
hitting let's head upstairs.
Speaker 4 (35:11):
Maybe what if like this this happens later in the relationship,
you're already liked.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Ter than it's been forty thousand years.
Speaker 4 (35:19):
Yeah, right, Well, like it's like I no longer can
shit unassisted? Will you please hold my hand while I shit?
It's like very important to me. I can't unassisted shit assisted.
Speaker 2 (35:29):
What you're talking about isn't real.
Speaker 4 (35:31):
But what if it happened? What if like it could
happen like I'm incontinent. What does that mean? You can't
hold your ship.
Speaker 2 (35:39):
Like I can't hold my shit in like I gotta
wear diapers?
Speaker 4 (35:41):
No, no, you you you're you're stopped.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
You.
Speaker 4 (35:44):
You can't shit unless somebody's real.
Speaker 2 (35:47):
That's not a real thing.
Speaker 3 (35:48):
How maybe it is, but it isn't blake. You can't
shit unless someone's holding your hand. Yeah, like I could see, Well,
then you have mental problems. And then I think you
need to see a doctor.
Speaker 2 (35:57):
Yeah, yes, I'm saying this like something like like it's
not real. I haven't even seen this on like a
tail from the fucking dark Side episode, Like, yeah, come on.
Speaker 5 (36:06):
You're not watching old episodes.
Speaker 3 (36:07):
Man. Maybe Jada Pickett Smith, who can we just say?
Is she's kooky, she's cooky, right, she's a little wild child.
Speaker 4 (36:22):
Hot hot, hot hot.
Speaker 3 (36:23):
Her grandmother taught her how to masturbate her when she
was nine years old. Taught her how taught her how
to masturbate. Oh, my grandmother taught me how about self
pleasuring because she wanted me to know that the pleasure
was coming from me.
Speaker 2 (36:38):
Right now, Well, feminism is a complicated pond. I don't
want to dip my toe into.
Speaker 4 (36:47):
Yeah, I refuse, No, I mean that could be that,
Like that doesn't necessarily mean like this was like a demonstration,
but perhaps this was a conversation.
Speaker 5 (36:57):
She had with her like it's okay to have that conversation, right.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
Let me tell you something, Blake. Yeah, I'm just trying
to imagine my grandfather yeah being like do you get
erections anders and me being like, uh yeah, just started
getting those. Why what's up.
Speaker 4 (37:22):
Stroking that?
Speaker 2 (37:23):
Like, no, dude, what no?
Speaker 4 (37:26):
Why not that? I mean, why not? That could be
a healthy conversation for somebody to have with someone.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
Everything can be in a healthy everything can be a
conversation that's healthy. Ain't no way this.
Speaker 3 (37:38):
Was you can't be what But then you look out
she turned out exactly yes, absolutely all her fucking rocker,
a lunatic, a crazy person. Okay, so then that all
of her business needs to be out there in the streets, right,
So yeah, I thought it might have had a negative
this one Lea Michelle and her friend Jonathan Groff.
Speaker 2 (38:01):
Look at this.
Speaker 4 (38:04):
Spill a du weekly.
Speaker 3 (38:07):
I think he's a gay man. I'm pretty sure he's
a gay man. Okay, what he said he had never
seen a vagina before her husband. No, her best friend
got best friend forever, Jonathan Groff. He's a gay guy,
I believe. She he had never seen a vagina, so
she took a desk lamp and it spread eagle and
(38:31):
showed him the all the lips and layers.
Speaker 4 (38:36):
That's a great friend.
Speaker 2 (38:37):
So here's my whole thing. Leah Michelle, who also don't know.
Speaker 3 (38:41):
Her really really or at all.
Speaker 2 (38:44):
I mean like I don't know her personally or even
like professionally. Really.
Speaker 4 (38:49):
I want to be on you.
Speaker 2 (38:50):
Why are you doing this? You don't what are you doing?
There is the internet, there is old gas stations where
Adam had his life to why are you up on
a table with a desk lamp? What are you getting
out of this? And are you available for parties?
Speaker 4 (39:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (39:09):
That's kind of You're you're kind of a fucking mind.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
I'm kind of just like where does this start and end?
Speaker 3 (39:15):
I kind of think that's a cool chick. But that's
also like about how gay is he? Because was you know?
Because I feel like as like a long ploy, like
he's really working every angle.
Speaker 2 (39:24):
He's a Broadway actors super gay.
Speaker 4 (39:28):
He's a super gay.
Speaker 5 (39:29):
I don't know about that.
Speaker 3 (39:31):
Yeah, like there's not one straight man that does properly.
Speaker 5 (39:34):
Yeah, well I was. I was a theater majors though.
Speaker 2 (39:36):
Yeah, no, he's pretty good. That's right.
Speaker 3 (39:38):
You have a dog named Pickles you've never admitted to
so so there's you have some deep secrets and the name.
Speaker 4 (39:43):
Gets some deep secret.
Speaker 2 (39:45):
You know what's funny? Jonathan Groff, he's not somebody who's
what would be common classified long ago. It's like flaming
right whatever. But I remember watching him a scripture. You
don't hear it anymore, but I missed that, but we
all know what it used to mean and the and
the weight that it carried after this. But when he
was on Goofy, that really good serial killer show, and
(40:09):
he was straight on that, yeah, I was like, but
you're not.
Speaker 3 (40:13):
What show was that? That was the David Fincher show,
like the body Hunter, mind Hunter, mind Hunter, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:21):
Ah that but he was straight on that, and I
was like, or not like you just yeah kind of
you're like, you know, it's like when you watch Borgahawks
episodes and you're like, oh, durs is like a straight guy.
I know's yeah, okay, you know.
Speaker 3 (40:35):
Right, and dude, imagine this. Imagine so Olivia Wild once
said about her sex life with her ex husband, look
at him, go dude, I mean, it's a whole thread.
I just I read this just three minutes before before
coming on. She said. Imagine if you're this is what blake,
you have an ex wife. Imagine your ex wife said
(40:58):
this why in the news about you? So she's talking
to a reporter about this. Imagine she said this about you.
I felt like my vagina died. It turned off lights out.
You can lie to your relatives at Christmas dinner and
(41:18):
tell them everything on the home front is just perfect,
but you cannot lie to your vagina. She added later,
sometimes your vagina dies, then you know it's time to go.
Speaker 2 (41:30):
I don't disagree. And look, as I say this, I
understand what this podcast is for us, But you don't
have to say everything. Yeah, I mean, what is going
on where people put a mic in your face and
you're like, tell my secrets?
Speaker 4 (41:47):
Yeah, the honesty is not required the TMI. It's okay
to to have some You can hide a dog well.
Speaker 3 (41:53):
And also like I get that, like she's no longer
married to this man, and maybe there is some animosity
there and probably you don't like him. Or or whatever reason.
There's some there's some hate there. But to say that
your vagina died, that's that's just a bad look.
Speaker 2 (42:15):
For her where you're like, you really got to go
out of your way. That bad for this no name dude.
He was just chilling on the couch right now and
now Adam Devine's reading a show.
Speaker 5 (42:25):
I feel for this guy.
Speaker 3 (42:26):
I mean, I don't know this poor guy. I mean,
I'm looking at this guy. I mean he hot. I
wouldn't say he's hot, but he's a regular looking guy.
But he's wearing a Fedora, so he already.
Speaker 4 (42:41):
Already My vagina would my vagina would die right there.
It died at the Fedora. Brother, you can't have.
Speaker 2 (42:48):
To wait, we're saying the vagina. He didn't kill the pussy.
Speaker 3 (42:52):
No no, no, no, no, he didn't kill the vagina died
just when it looked at his dick.
Speaker 4 (42:57):
Of natural causes. Fedora related, that's rough. Can can you
imagine I can imagine that.
Speaker 2 (43:04):
Cool, cool, cool thing to put on wast.
Speaker 4 (43:06):
Yeah, to kind of lit him up. I like.
Speaker 3 (43:08):
She also said about then partner Jason Sadek revived, he
revived and they had like a weird falling out too.
Who is this, Olivia Wilde.
Speaker 2 (43:19):
Wild I was thinking a mom the whole time.
Speaker 4 (43:21):
No, Olivia wild So.
Speaker 3 (43:22):
Olivia Wilde then said about uh then partner Jason sideikis
that that they're having sex like a Kenyon like Kenyan
marathon runners. So just I guess that's for a long time.
This the stamina, Okay?
Speaker 2 (43:36):
Is that good?
Speaker 4 (43:37):
Yeah? Pen, they they are having sector a very very
long time.
Speaker 3 (43:45):
That's actually kind of tired. I wouldn't mind.
Speaker 4 (43:47):
I'm hearing that women don't really like having sex very
long anymore. That's the new thing I'm hearing.
Speaker 3 (43:53):
I'm here.
Speaker 4 (43:53):
Yeah, I'm hearing, bro just open up, just be cool.
From gall pals.
Speaker 3 (44:01):
Here, they kind of want to.
Speaker 4 (44:02):
They want to kind of get it. They want to
get it done with.
Speaker 5 (44:05):
They don't really want I think that's.
Speaker 3 (44:07):
Your girl going like, wrap it up, dude, what are
you doing?
Speaker 4 (44:09):
Yeah? Oh man, I'm hearing from I'm hearing from several
my gal pals that they aren't looking for a long time.
They're just looking for a good time, all right. And
these marathon guys, yeah, you got it. You got to
wrap it up.
Speaker 3 (44:22):
But sometimes you you know, you like to, you know,
spend your time you know, the stamina, keep it at
good pace.
Speaker 5 (44:30):
What's the mac like fifteen minutes?
Speaker 4 (44:32):
Come on?
Speaker 3 (44:33):
Come on?
Speaker 2 (44:34):
Yeah, what are you trying to do? I mean, I
guess it's just a minute mark. You're switching things up.
Speaker 4 (44:40):
You're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (44:43):
I mean, I'm not there anymore.
Speaker 2 (44:44):
Also, at this time, at this point, days are long.
Days are long, days are long.
Speaker 3 (44:49):
Yeah, I'm not there anymore. My back hurts too much.
I usually just give up about five minutes in and
be like, I'm good, I'm good. Your turn my back.
My back's killing me, I say, I you go. Oh
Jessica Simpson, uh uh what is this?
Speaker 2 (45:07):
Is this an article or a website or is it
a realistical.
Speaker 3 (45:09):
No, it's just you know how they have threads on
different shiit on on Twitter, where like a person just
like breaks down like a topic.
Speaker 2 (45:15):
I haven't been on Twitter and forever.
Speaker 4 (45:16):
Oh yeah, yeah I've been.
Speaker 3 (45:18):
It's toxic.
Speaker 4 (45:20):
Pretty cool, I've been trying.
Speaker 3 (45:21):
Well, it's just so remember how you used to say
about Jessica Simpson ers bodies No that you used to say,
like you don't find her sexy because it looks like
she would fart in front of you.
Speaker 2 (45:35):
Ah, that sounds like something I would definitely say.
Speaker 3 (45:38):
Yeah, you guys, I remember you saying like you think
Carrie Underwood would keep it together and she's very sexy,
but you don't get Jessica Simpson because it looks like
she would fart in front of you and a little
dudoo would pop up.
Speaker 2 (45:52):
Do you. I don't know what the dodo, but I do.
I can. I can see her farting and then like
laughing about it and me being like, but you keep
doing it.
Speaker 3 (46:01):
Yeah, I've asked you, Yeah, you have a gas but
that was on my leg, don't Well, she had a.
Speaker 4 (46:07):
Reality show, didn't she like do a lot of farting
on that reality show?
Speaker 3 (46:11):
I don't know if she did or not.
Speaker 2 (46:12):
Maybe I think that was it. It was just a
lot of like eating with her bare hands. I don't know, go.
Speaker 4 (46:16):
Ahead, yeah I think it was.
Speaker 6 (46:17):
So.
Speaker 3 (46:17):
She said at one point, I guess on Ellen that
she only brushes her teeth maybe three times a week.
Speaker 2 (46:26):
As someone who brushes only once a day.
Speaker 4 (46:29):
Not okay, not okay, Yeah, yeah that is great, that
is crazy.
Speaker 3 (46:33):
But because she doesn't want them to feel too slippery,
which is and she needs a little Coatine coatin, A
little coatin, Yeah, a coatine. No, a little coatin, you
might be off the coadeine. Instead of brushing every day,
she uses a shirt or something to wipe her teeth.
(46:53):
Oh yeah, like she is an So when I read this,
I was like, oh, was absolutely right. Not only is
she farting in front of you all the time.
Speaker 4 (47:03):
She's brushed her teeth with her.
Speaker 3 (47:04):
Shirt, she's brushing her teeth with her shirt.
Speaker 2 (47:06):
Oh bro, if her teeth are that dirty, booty hole
has to be disregarded, complete disregard for the butt.
Speaker 3 (47:15):
Of Absolutely, if you can't honor the sanctity of your
own mouth, your booty hole is a fucking graveyard.
Speaker 4 (47:23):
Oh no, detail, white dude, it was damn there's all
kinds of ship back there. Literally, that's crazy.
Speaker 2 (47:33):
It's too bad too. It's too bad.
Speaker 4 (47:35):
I thought maybe maybe it was like to protect her voice,
like in like toothpaste damages your vocal cords or something.
Speaker 2 (47:40):
But she just like, you're such a good person that
I think it's getting in the way of your success.
And and I don't mean like professionally, I mean like
we're done professionally made happiness. Like I think you'd be
a happier person if if you took away the ben
a fit of the doubt from almost everyone, Why.
Speaker 3 (48:03):
What's going on? Did what did Blake just say?
Speaker 2 (48:06):
He like rationalized, He was like, well, maybe if if
it helps her singing.
Speaker 4 (48:11):
That maybe maybe she wasn't brushing her teeth because like yeah,
like cause you know, like vocalists, they tend to like
have like be very careful with their vocal cords. Maybe
the mint of the toothpaste is damaging or something, but
she just doesn't like her teeth feeling slippery.
Speaker 2 (48:28):
That's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 3 (48:29):
Yeah, so this this thread is I mean, it's it's wild, dude.
Uh Madonna, I mean the Madonna one. You're like, yeah,
she's a fucking weirdo. He's on record. He was so
cool though. She goes, it's really good to drink urine
after you've got out of a frozen bath.
Speaker 4 (48:48):
I don't understand.
Speaker 2 (48:50):
I wouldn't know any better. I don't know. I've never
been in either a frozen bath or tried to peep.
Speaker 4 (48:56):
That is a about there is there's a movement of
people who are drinking urine. Now you see the guy
on Instagram all the time. They're claiming it has benefit.
Speaker 2 (49:06):
Yeah, if you're thirsty.
Speaker 3 (49:10):
Waking of dehydration.
Speaker 4 (49:12):
But I don't even think like because when you're like
out in the desert stranded, if you drink your urine,
it doesn't it doesn't not dehydrate.
Speaker 2 (49:20):
I think after a while, I think once, because your
body keeps processing it. But like you pee out water
at well, yeah, but then after you keep drinking that
and you don't have much to pee out, and that's
yellow as as a motherfucker.
Speaker 4 (49:32):
I do remember one of the like survival things was
like you pee in like a hole and then you
put like like if you have like a like what's
the zip lock paper, the plastic wrap, and then the
water Yeah, the water rises out.
Speaker 2 (49:47):
Ye.
Speaker 6 (49:47):
You're like.
Speaker 4 (49:50):
Yeah, and then you drink that. If you're ever stuck
in a desert or something and you have no water,
I'll just drink Adams p Okay, Yeah, I drink I.
Speaker 2 (49:59):
Give you my pe Adam standing sixty nine right at me.
Speaker 3 (50:02):
Damn any tape backs, any apologies, any epic slams.
Speaker 4 (50:06):
Oh I do.
Speaker 2 (50:08):
I'll apologize for going hard at Blake the last couple episodes.
But what it is for me, thank you is an
absolute pleasure. Yeah, No, it's just fun to learn about
you then have a dog is I think people listening
will be like, what what?
Speaker 3 (50:29):
Ye never brought it up, never mentioned the fact that
this animal lives with him. I feel like we've talked
about everything that you could talk about with one another,
and the fact that you have this animal.
Speaker 4 (50:42):
That your home.
Speaker 3 (50:43):
I I and there's wasn't one story about like a
ship on something, or you slipped on some shit, or
you took you took the dog out for a walk
and some shit funny or crazy happened.
Speaker 4 (50:55):
Right, No, not really.
Speaker 2 (50:57):
Does nothing funny or crazy happen with that dog?
Speaker 4 (51:00):
Not not not really. It's pretty just much just like
a pretty chill dog. That's why I never have brought
it up.
Speaker 3 (51:05):
Well, you said it wasn't a chill dog. And the
reason that I've never seen it. I've got over to
your house a couple of times.
Speaker 4 (51:11):
Now, it's chilling the way that it's not a hilarious,
hilarious dog that has a bunch of hilarious stories.
Speaker 2 (51:18):
It doesn't pass the vibe track.
Speaker 4 (51:21):
Yeah, but I apologize for not being more forth right.
Speaker 2 (51:26):
Fourth right, either fourth right or forthcoming.
Speaker 5 (51:32):
Yep, he was gonna come you saw me what you
saw me?
Speaker 2 (51:35):
Wind, I knew. I was like, it's fourth it's fourth
meal or something.
Speaker 3 (51:40):
I was gonna say, forthcoming.
Speaker 4 (51:42):
Well, I apologize for being forthcoming and forth right with
you guys. Also, you know, you apologize about you know,
bullying me, writing me, but then you keep you keep
doing it, so the apology doesn't have a lot of
weight for it because you're you're not changing what your
apologize about.
Speaker 7 (52:03):
All right, this was another episode imported child.
Speaker 3 (52:15):
Oh yeah, but bitch, no, no, no, man,
Hosts And Creators
Anders Holm
Kyle Newacheck
Adam Devine
Blake Anderson
Show Links
Live AppearancesPopular Podcasts
Monster: BTK
'Monster: BTK', the newest installment in the 'Monster' franchise, reveals the true story of the Wichita, Kansas serial killer who murdered at least 10 people between 1974 and 1991. Known by the moniker, BTK – Bind Torture Kill, his notoriety was bolstered by the taunting letters he sent to police, and the chilling phone calls he made to media outlets. BTK's identity was finally revealed in 2005 to the shock of his family, his community, and the world. He was the serial killer next door. From Tenderfoot TV & iHeartPodcasts, this is 'Monster: BTK'.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations.