December 1, 2025 • 55 mins
Welcome to couples therapy, filled with tough love and hard truths. Raven-Symoné and Miranda Maday tell Ashlyn the story of how they fell in love, U-Haul and all. They don’t leave out the hard parts of their story, like the time Raven broke up with Miranda and the healing and vulnerability it took for them to re-commit to one another for life. They reveal the ways they've challenged and pushed one another to grow in their relationship, the weird AI generated videos wreacking havock on their lives, and why they want each other to live forever.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Today on Wide Open, I'm sitting down with two women
who've grown up, evolved, and loved in the public eye,
and have somehow managed to keep what matters most to
them just for themselves. Raven Simone, an icon who's been
on our screen since childhood, carrying generations of stories, laughter,
and expectation. And Miranda a Day, the brilliant, grounded force
(00:23):
beside her, helping shape what partnership and purpose look like
when you strip away the noise. We're talking about growing
up in the spotlight, healing old wounds, queerness, identity, and
the work it takes to build a love that actually lasts.
We'll get into what they protect, what they share, and
what they've learned about sex and identity, what it really
(00:45):
means to find love you've always dreamed of later in
life when you're ready to receive it. We'll talk about
their production company, the stories they want to tell next,
and the beautiful gut punch moment that Raven said you
wanted Miranda to live forever, because when you finally found
your person, the hardest part is knowing time isn't infinite.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
This one's about.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
Love, legacy, and building a life that feels like home.
Let's get wide open. Raven Miranda, thank you so much
for being here today on Wide Open.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
How are you?
Speaker 3 (01:31):
We are well, doing very well.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
That's a loaded question right now, but at least we're here,
We're alive, we're healthy, and we're enjoying this space together today.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
So I feel lucky.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
You got to start with the good things.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
We got to start with the good things before we
fucking get in there and start hammering down what this
political landscape actually is right now now I'm kidding. He's
not a political podcast, but we will talk shit.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
Okay, great, that's fair. We can do that. We kind
of suck out, but talking shit we thrive.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
Yeah, we just go listen.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
It has been so fun to follow your journey. I
love the podcast. I love your relationship. It is so genuine,
so sweet. It's been really you know, we've never met
before and this is like new homie experience, but I
do feel like I know you both just from how
you show up in the world and the visibility aspect.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
You know, I really appreciate and it's a it's a
vulnerable thing these days to really live your truth. So
I appreciate you both being here.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
Thank you.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
That's so kind, We are really happy to be here.
And also same because we've seen you and Sophia out
and about in certain places and we're always.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
Like, oh my god, hi you guys.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
And I love just how you two have shared and
let people in and you know your your entire journey
honestly before even meeting Sophia, and so thank you for
your busines ability as well.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
Oh well, you're so sweet. We got to do a
double date when we're in lad.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
It's so great.
Speaker 5 (03:05):
Could you bring that hat and just leave it with
me when we do that double date because I guess.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
This is going to be my new gift to you.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
I just got it, so I will gladly regift it
to you when I get to La. We're doing We're
we're hosting a friends giving, which you will have an
invite of course.
Speaker 4 (03:23):
Oh well, because we've been going back and forth about
what we're going to do for the holidays, and we
decided listen, we're a married couple. We're allowed to say
we get to start our own traditions. Now. We don't
have to be like bouncing from family to family and
thinking like this parent is going to be pissed, so
let's do it. Ourselves and figure out what we want
(03:44):
that to look like. So that's that's so nice to
know that we have an invitation somewhere too.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
Though.
Speaker 1 (03:49):
Listen, it's going to be very gay, it's going to
be very safe. We're going to talk a lot of
shit because that's what we do. We're going to laugh
through the chaos because what else at this point can
we do. But yeah, I actually am I'm so aligned
because you know, back in the day when I used
to I come from a military background, so I can
(04:13):
only imagine what my Thanksgiving would be like walking in
now and seeing if Fox News was on the TV
and I have zero filter, so that it would absolutely
be a nightmare and a disaster for everyone involved. Because
I feel like at this point I'm a wrecking ball
and I just need to tell everyone how I feel.
Speaker 4 (04:33):
I feel like you'd end up leaving with like mapped
potatoes on your face, greavy like on your pants, because
there would have been a food fight.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
Yeah, they're gonna say, you know what, You're not welcome anymore,
get that hell out of here.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
And I'm like, don't worry. I moved away from Florida
very quickly for a reason.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Oh yeah, Wow.
Speaker 5 (04:50):
Yeah, we have those family members too that sit on
the opposite side of the aisle, and it is a
delicate dance when having those conversations, not even at family dinners,
it's also a delicate dance just on an every day
especially when the phone ring, just when the phone rings,
just when you get a quick little TikTok or an
ex from one of our parents, and it's just like,
(05:11):
thanks for that information. You know, that's my community, right, Yeah,
it's really fun.
Speaker 3 (05:16):
It's for me.
Speaker 5 (05:18):
It's a masterclass and patience and empathy and letting everyone
have their say and trying my best not to cuss
them out.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
Gosh, it's like we all struggle with the same shit.
I love it. It's like you're speaking to my core
right now.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
But I want to know how you guys, like how
you met, how this actual? I mean, you've been married
now what five years. It's been so beautiful to watch
because Raven, I remember at one point you were being
very private about your life. You were like, listen, I
live that shit. You guys are wild. I'm out, I'm
(05:54):
protecting my peace. And now I feel like there's been,
you know, over the years, a pretty massive shift in
the best way, because your visibility together has been so
influential and impactful for our queer community.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Like what was that big shift?
Speaker 5 (06:13):
Okay, so that's a two part question. I'm gonna let
her answer the first part and then I'll come into mind.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
Okay, let's do it. So how we met.
Speaker 4 (06:19):
We met at a karaoke night Raven was hosting.
Speaker 3 (06:23):
I was there with a.
Speaker 4 (06:24):
Few friends and we ended up talking to each other
at the bar and I just was like, I'm going
to know this person.
Speaker 3 (06:32):
I really felt this connection.
Speaker 4 (06:33):
It was easy and fun and conversational, and as she
was leaving, she invited me to a house party she
was throwing the following weekend, and at that moment, in
my mind, I was like, Okay, but if I'm going
to go to your house party, I'm going to have
to have a date with you before.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
Like that was just the order of operations in my head.
So she gave.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
Me your number, and then that week we went on
a one on one date and ended up talking, and
true in fashion, we talked for like ten hours in
the car.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
We didn't even leave the car. We just talked about everything,
and I remember just being overwhelmed with our conversation.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
And thinking, oh my gosh, it's incredible that I can
talk to somebody about everything from show tunes and the
entertainment industry to these deep traumas and this psychological stuff
that also I really enjoy discussing. And we just hit
all the boxes and I knew at that moment, I
really was like, this is my person. Went to her
(07:33):
house party and then during this week of time she
was leaving to go to the View, so she was
only in LA for about two weeks. And after her
house party, she came and stayed with me for four
days because her house was all packed up and crashed.
Speaker 3 (07:47):
My house was trash.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Yeah you haul in?
Speaker 3 (07:50):
Yeah, Oh my gosh, super u hauling. Because over those
four days, she was like, Hey, if.
Speaker 4 (07:56):
I were to buy you a ticket to New York
to come on this can trip with me and my friends,
Like would you come? And I remember thinking, no, I
won't because I don't really know you and I have
a job in like life and.
Speaker 3 (08:09):
You're fine, come on, And literally that's what she said,
and I ended up going.
Speaker 4 (08:13):
She got me a one way ticket that was end
of August. I didn't come home until the first of October,
and then I know we were terrible and then I
moved back to Neruble. Just in terms of how fast
we moved, I mean it was crazy.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
That's that's real slow.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
That's yeah exactly.
Speaker 1 (08:33):
It's funny you say that because every single holiday birthday
that Sophia's friends like for her.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
It's always a U Haul hat, it's always a U
Haul shirt.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
It's always like she dipped her pinky toe in and
she was like, I am diving into this pool.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
I am done. Put a bow on it, like same thing.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
I was like, honey, I live in New York. You
live in l She has not been back. She has
not been back. She's like, I don't care.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
I'm done. I'm done. This is good, this is oh.
I haven't searched my whole life for this. I'm going
nowhere strapping.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Good for her, strap in and strap up.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
Okay, but yeah, it's it's magical when all of that aligns,
and you know, and I just had to deal with
see you're on board.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Raven broke up with me, and then I had to.
Speaker 5 (09:25):
She she the question was, the question is how we met,
how we broke up? Okay, sorry, every time the question
is how we met? And now is my time to answer,
but you told the whole story about having met, so
let me get into my section. So to answer your
question about just privacy, you know, my whole life, I
was really taught that you're not supposed to really share
(09:45):
your public You're not supposed to share your private with
your public, because sometimes that can overshadow the work. I
grew up in the time of you know, the National
Inquirer and you know people, and when relationships really did
outshine people's product and content. So multiple NDAs with a
lot of people met her and tried to get her
(10:07):
to sign an NDA reluctant, but did.
Speaker 4 (10:12):
And then it's so sad to me. Sorry to interrupt you,
but it was sad to me because it felt all
of a sudden like this and I understand it, but
it felt like a business negotiation and something. And I
was and I was, I love you, and at that
point that was such a foreign idea to me to
have to kind of I was also like, what do
you think I would do if we were to break up?
(10:33):
You think I'm going to go like run to some
publisher and be like, let me give you a tell all?
And I just that, But that's not It's so far
from who I am.
Speaker 3 (10:40):
I couldn't. I do understand that a lot of people
have done that. It's a lot of people have lied
on people, and you know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (10:49):
And I just you know, my parents were very very
adamant about me protecting my life and especially being gay.
That was even more to me something that my parents
did didn't even know about. But for me, it was like, Okay,
at the time, this could be quote unquote dangerous to
come out. Nobody should know this because the culture that
I grew up in, it wasn't as open as it
(11:11):
is now. So when we got married, I was still
under the impression that were won't be quiet. But I
knew that when I did marry. Before I met her,
I knew that when I married, I would be more
comfortable telling truths about my relationship because there is a
contract that there are things that can be said, that
(11:32):
things that can it's not just a girlfriend or it's
not just a boyfriend, to where you know, you got
to think about it a little bit longer before you
leave me, yes, exactly. And so you know, she was
really gung ho for getting out there and doing lives
with me and us sharing our relationship and she made
me feel comfortable. So and it's fun to be able
(11:54):
to just show what a lesbian marriage looks like, even
though it just looks like a normal marriage. But I
think that some people need to have certain titles to
make it seem like, ooh, that's what you guys do,
and like, yeah, we bicker and have a good time
at the science.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
We're normal people. Welcome to the party, honey.
Speaker 4 (12:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
Yeah, it's interesting that you say that, because I you
did grow up with the world watching and when you
look back, like, what parts of that little girl have
you worked so hard to protect and reclaim In this
new identity of just being like so happy, you just
(12:29):
seem so vibrant, so light. It's it's really you don't
have to know you for that long just to see
the way you're moving in the world.
Speaker 6 (12:39):
Oh, thank you very much. Now that's a loaded question
for me.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
Sorry, I figured right off the top of the show.
Let's go listen.
Speaker 6 (12:48):
It's fine, it's fine.
Speaker 3 (12:50):
How would you? And that's hard for me.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
Because I think for you, it's it's an ongoing process. Yeah,
And what I've witnessed in Raven, let's say, over the
ten plus years I've known her, now is the raven
that I met back in twenty fifteen was extremely guarded,
(13:15):
even though she seemed so open to me. What I've
realized now is the different There are such different pockets
of who she is and how she maneuvers, how she expressed. Yeah,
and she's a master of disassociation.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
Which I association.
Speaker 5 (13:34):
Remember my therapist said, it's not disassociation, it's dissociation.
Speaker 4 (13:37):
Okay, she's a master of dissociation. And that was also
a protection. That was a defense mechanism into place because
of my childhood, because of her childhood, for sure. But
what I've seen you do and work on recently is
letting that little girl actually have a voice, because I
(13:59):
think she'd never had one. And I see you giving
space for those little girl feelings to surface and show up,
and then also you.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
Are able to better.
Speaker 4 (14:11):
Parent and love that little that part of you I
think that didn't get what she needed.
Speaker 5 (14:16):
So to piggyback on that, to answer verbatim, what part
of me am I protecting? I've protected the little girl
and the middle school girl my whole life, like they've
always been in a box somewhere, so that the industry
or anyone around me couldn't touch them, and they were
always banging on the door. Only recently have I remembered
(14:38):
where I placed that key and allow, But there were
so many different masks that got hit with all of
the Hollywood bs over the years that the little girl
was just like, what's happening?
Speaker 3 (14:51):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (14:52):
So I think it's really beautiful that you both. I mean,
clearly you both do the work. I mean, it's very evident.
But I think what's so beautiful and what I don't
think people talk about enough is and Sophia and I
talk about this at length all the time. She is
(15:16):
such a beautiful human that has grown up in the
public eye and it has broken her in so many
ways that she is highly anxious. She cares way too
much about what people think, and she's very very, very
very highly sensitive. And I don't weaponize that. I actually
(15:40):
care for it. And I think, Miranda, that's exactly what
you're saying, Like she carries this history, and I imagine
finding each other has been such a pivotal moment in
both of your lives that you care for each other's
scars in a way that is beautiful.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
Where most people can weaponize.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
Most people are like, don't bring that baggage into this, Like,
I don't, that's old. It's not my job to unpack it.
But I actually highly disagree. I think we all are
a work in progress, and we all have a lot
of trauma and grief we carry, and I think the
most beautiful relationships care for that in a very sacred
(16:25):
way that helps them walk that life even though there's
broken pieces of it. Would you agree?
Speaker 5 (16:33):
You're so fantastic because I'm the person who's like, don't
bring that baggage in here?
Speaker 3 (16:38):
What are you doing?
Speaker 6 (16:39):
Why didn't I get fixed with the last relationship.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
We're adults.
Speaker 5 (16:42):
That's me, She's the sweetheart. I'm the one like, what
the fuck is happening right now? Well, I don't even
think it's I'm learning, though she is learning.
Speaker 4 (16:49):
I don't even think it's like being a sweetheart or
anything like that.
Speaker 3 (16:52):
I think it's really how you perceive in your relationships.
Speaker 4 (16:58):
And I think what you're saying, Ashon, I really am
aligned with because I think that when people commit to
each other, it is one of the most beautiful, life
changing things you can do to give space for another
person to show up as themselves truly, and we say
(17:20):
these things all the time, but I think to really
understand that and really put it into practice is another
story and another conversation. And also understanding my belief that
is in relationship is that we're really just mirroring each other,
constantly mirroring each other, which means if I am triggered
by Raven, it has way less to do with Raven
(17:42):
than it has to do with me, And that discomfort
for me is data that's information for me to go
into on my own time to figure out.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
But to have a partner who's.
Speaker 4 (17:53):
Also willing to sit by your side, hold your hand,
be the stability, the love, the support that you might
not have ever received, to be the home if you will,
for you to then be the adult version of yourself
that might have to also play out the kid version
of yourself is the greatest gift we can, I think,
(18:16):
give each other, because you're allowing someone's space to heal
and become what I think is maybe the best version
of themselves. Yeah, and that's that's who could ask for
anything more.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Stay tuned. I'll be back in just a moment. After
this brief message from our sponsors. I have listened to
a lot of your interviews, and both of you do
talk about having such an open line of communication and
so much honesty in this new version of who you
(18:55):
are and your relationship. I know, Raven, you spoke about
when Miranda. I don't know if it was something about,
you know, having separate bedrooms or having those hard kind
of conversations.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Where did that? Did it take time to get there?
Speaker 3 (19:13):
She loves you right.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
Now, we just we're in therapy. If you don't know,
she'd always.
Speaker 6 (19:19):
Her love language girl, and I'm just like no.
Speaker 3 (19:25):
I will say that. I will start it like this.
Speaker 5 (19:28):
I grew up in my house, she grew up in
her house, and our parenting styles, our parents' parenting styles
are extremely different. And with that extreme from both sides
of the line, my harsh tone, aggressive nature, and right
(19:49):
to the point conversation was probably a little bit harming
at the beginning because I grew up in a family
where it's like go pick up the shoes, Okay, I
did it great, That's what you're supposed to do.
Speaker 6 (20:03):
Keep going like it wasn't a oh you did such
a good job.
Speaker 5 (20:07):
That came when you did something excellent, and that informed
me on how to be in relationships where it's just like,
I need you to do that real quick, thanks much,
And they're like, well, not her, but other partners were like, well,
do I get some love after it.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
I'm like, that's a shit's supposed to do. I don't
know what's going on.
Speaker 5 (20:23):
So working with her and mirroring her, I've learned how
to be a little bit softer, a little bit, you know,
not as aggressive. But at the same time, all we
have always.
Speaker 3 (20:34):
Told the truth to each other.
Speaker 5 (20:35):
We have always been in a relationship for the ten
hours that we met the first day, where we just
knew that talking was important. And I think after we
got married maybe it felt a little bit more like, oh, okay,
do I have to put on my soft gloves again?
Because this is not for me. This is not something
(20:57):
I can run away from. This is someone that's going
to be with me forever. How do I then communicate
the best way for her to understand? And there was
a long time where it would be like, Okay, how
do I say this in order for you to understand
my language? Because we speak different languages, you know what
I mean? And so I think that's a constant even today,
with the growth that we have had, I sometimes catch
(21:19):
myself going back into my old way of a could
you do this real quick, and then forgetting like, oh sorry, babes,
love you.
Speaker 6 (21:24):
Can you did such a good job. I love you
so much.
Speaker 3 (21:26):
Can you do this? But I'm being extreme with it.
Speaker 4 (21:30):
I think for me, what's been interesting is I came
into almost every single relationship I've ever had with set
ideas that are very much built from the heterosexual world
number one. And I also had a lot of fear
(21:50):
around relationships because of my abandonment issues. So I understood
that and I made this commitment to myself. I was like,
I am not going to have what happened to my
parents happened to me, and that meant get divorced or
be in an unhappy relationship. And I know that sometimes
(22:11):
divorce can actually be a positive thing for people, but
I really like, had this just this clear idea that
by the time I decided to get married, I was
going to be really sure that I was with the
right person I could build my life with.
Speaker 3 (22:23):
So unfortunately I didn't.
Speaker 4 (22:27):
Really do the work before to position myself in a
way where I was secure enough in myself to start
building from that space, Because I think if I was
secure in myself those ideas, those fears wouldn't have been
so all consuming. So I came into my relationship with
Raven or our marriage with a lot of the same
(22:48):
issues I had as a girlfriend, which were being abandoned,
being not worthy, not lovable. If I wasn't validated consistently,
then something was the matter, and that meant I had
fucked something up and blah blah blah.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
So what I really had to.
Speaker 4 (23:03):
Learn was our relationship, like she said, language and understanding,
like specifically the separate bedroom thing. For me, you'd ask
me that three years ago, I would have had the
tape in my head that I've heard most people say,
which is separate bedrooms, you're on the road to divorce.
That's oh my god, you're not having sex every night.
Well he's about to go and cheat on you. Don't
(23:26):
like That was the tape in my head. And what
I had to learn, and what Raven has helped me
with so much, is no, it's okay that we like
separate spaces.
Speaker 3 (23:35):
It's actually like helping us.
Speaker 4 (23:37):
That's helping us, And this is really all that matters,
is what happens for us. You know, what if we
can't have sex every night, because that is exhausting for us.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
That's okay, because when you it works for us. The
comparing and contrasting that I was stuck in in almost
every avenue of my life. I'm very much that person.
Oh my gosh, she's so much prettier than me. Oh
my gosh, she's so much more fit. She's blah blah blah.
That lived in my relationship. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 5 (24:04):
That partner is posting all the time about this there.
Oh my god, the posting hilarious. If I didn't post
for her birthday, she'd be like, you don't love me.
I'm like, girl, I am up underneath your arm pit
the worst times.
Speaker 3 (24:14):
I love you so much. Yeah, Internet doesn't know. Nobody
gives them.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
But that's that's like I want to be in your skin, actually, yeah,
Like I don't.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
Want you on my Instagram. I need inside of your body.
Speaker 2 (24:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (24:26):
But I mean, those are the things I think that
are really difficult when you're just a human being existing
in this world and we have as much messaging as
we do, and have as many ideas telling us of
how we should be, what we should look like, what
our relationship should be like, how we should be exercising, eating.
I mean, it goes on and on and on. So
I think that when I boil it down, and we've
(24:46):
boiled it down, it is about being really honest with
each other, allowing uncomfortable things to happen. But all of
those things can happen because we have built a really
solid foundation. And when you know at a baseline that
you're with someone who has got your back and you're
safe with, then you can do the uncomfortable things.
Speaker 5 (25:06):
One of the things that I used to say in
the beginning of a relationship when things got heightened in
her anxiety and all this stuff started to flare up,
and be like, but I married you. Yeah, don't forget Yeah,
had I married yeah? But you didn't say this. This
is I'm like, but I married you. My problem in
the relationship was that I was too confident. I had
done so much work with all of my guys and
(25:26):
females beforehand, where I would sit there and be like,
you need space to do what you need to do.
I'll be here for you when you need the love
that I can give you. And that's how I functioned,
and with her she needed a lot more. So I
had to learn how to give her that and more.
What I mean is care and affection. Yeah, and I
had not had that prior to because I was just
(25:49):
letting everybody calm themselves down. But she also needed that
space to grow and to live. And then now we
can come together and be like, you want to get
the love that I want to give you at this
at this stage in our life.
Speaker 3 (26:02):
It's nice.
Speaker 6 (26:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:03):
And it's interesting because you've both been really intentional about
what you share and what you hold sacred.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
Do you how do you decide.
Speaker 1 (26:13):
What you plan to like share for the world on
your podcast or this is just like this is for us, babe,
this is like our piece, our safety, this is our home.
Speaker 5 (26:25):
I think that I can answer this question by saying,
when you have a connection with someone, there's a quiet communication.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
Yea.
Speaker 5 (26:34):
We don't have to talk about what we don't want
to talk about because we know that we're not.
Speaker 3 (26:37):
About to talk about that right now. Wan, it'll flare
us up.
Speaker 1 (26:42):
Yep.
Speaker 5 (26:42):
Y'all don't need to know because it's just like that's personal.
We know what's personal. We know it's not quiet communication
one percent. There are so many moments on the podcast
where we'll look.
Speaker 4 (26:52):
At each other and we both just know the face
and it's like, oh, wait, are you doing it?
Speaker 3 (26:57):
But it's like are you doing that? Are you going to? Oh,
we're doing this okay, and.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
We know I mean, they're just like you said, babe,
I think there are just are things we know that.
Speaker 5 (27:07):
We will never need to discuss publicly. But it took
a minute. It took a minute to figure that out.
Speaker 4 (27:14):
It started out for me because I am such an
open book, and I came from a space of the
more conversation the better. The more I can share stories
about things that I've experienced, then more people can maybe
potentially relate, then there's a greater dialogue. And I've had
to learn that that actually isn't true. Sometimes sometimes I
(27:37):
just feel like I've given way too much, opened up
way too much, and especially now publicly, you set yourself
up for so much more criticism, so much more so,
many more opportunities to be misunderstood. And something I really
admire about you, Ashon and Sophia too, in listening listening.
Speaker 3 (27:58):
To you to talk.
Speaker 4 (27:59):
You both are so oh eloquent. You're so well spoken
and so intentional, and sometimes I've listened to you both
and I'm like, fuck.
Speaker 3 (28:07):
I should have just said it like that, like that,
it was just so clean, And I have a lot
of like let your file.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
I do think it's I can only share from my experience.
And I'm the same way Miranda. I like to overshare
because when I share and I go on loop about things,
it minimizes the big feeling I feel inside. So I
have to talk about it, like my mental health journey,
my addiction journey, my trauma as a child, the decision
(28:37):
to leave my ex wife, and I feel that it's
important for me to talk about the things otherwise, Raven,
I'm very similar. I became a master at completely being
able to push things down and disassociate.
Speaker 3 (28:57):
And dissociate, dissociate.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
And I want to share my scars with this younger generation,
like I am imperfectly perfect in a lot of ways,
and I am broken in a lot of ways, And like,
I have to talk about these things.
Speaker 2 (29:12):
But I'm curious for you both, Like.
Speaker 1 (29:15):
What has the public gotten wrong about you two that
you've learned to just say fuck it, I'm letting this go.
There's nothing I can do to change what people think,
and God, they have it really wrong, and that's unfortunate.
Up well, is this the look we're talking about?
Speaker 4 (29:36):
This this look was Go ahead, babe, the floor is yours,
because you get.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
A lot more hate than I do.
Speaker 4 (29:44):
I think, man, I think what I've experienced that's been
really surprising is.
Speaker 3 (29:53):
Okay. When we got married, Raven.
Speaker 4 (29:58):
Kind of give me a quick you know this can
this might be difficult, This might be difficult. And when
one of the reasons that she broke up with me
was because she wasn't ready to be with a white person,
and I did not know that she was struggling with
any of those feelings while we were dating, which made
me sad when I found out because I felt like
(30:19):
I couldn't well, there's nothing I can.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
Do about it.
Speaker 7 (30:21):
What was she about to do? But also makeup, there's
nothing I can do about it. There's nothing I can
do about my whiteness. But I could have just been more.
Speaker 4 (30:31):
Aware of what my partner was going through and maybe
supported her better that in some way. No, yeah, no,
I think I've just been surprised by how many people
number one hate me just because of what I look
like and the fact that we already.
Speaker 5 (30:48):
Welcome, welcome, welcome to the party.
Speaker 3 (30:52):
And that we are an interracial couple again.
Speaker 4 (30:55):
Part of why I even wanted to pitch the idea
of YouTube and how being a platform together was because
I was like, I don't see us anywhere, you know,
I see like Wanda Sykes and her wife. Really like
everyone else that I see that might look like us
is it's like Bet and Tina, like we need like
real representation, you know, we need a real couple. And
(31:17):
so I get a lot of I'm Raven's handler, I
whitewash her, I'm a gold digger, I'm controlsing. I don't
let Raven do anything by herself. You know, I talk
too much, I overtalk, I interrupt. I mean, the shit
that I see and hear is is overwhelming, and it's
(31:43):
kind of a shame because the truth of what's happening
is we're a couple that's trying to like grow, thrive,
create content that people may resonate with, might be entertained by.
I'm also trying to, yeah, of course, step into my
own strengths, find my voice more clearly in my work field.
(32:05):
You know, there are personal goals and growth that I'm
also trying to achieve that everyone is entitled to. So
I've tried to honestly, let all of it go Ashland
because the noise shouldn't impact me one way or another,
whether it's positive or negative. It's that's a new thought process.
Let me let me jump in here. Yeah, that's because
(32:26):
when it did start, there was a little bit of
a thing between us because she was like, why aren't.
Speaker 3 (32:31):
You Why aren't you saying this? And the why aren't
you saying this?
Speaker 2 (32:34):
In the comments?
Speaker 3 (32:34):
Why aren't you saying this? And I'm like, I've.
Speaker 5 (32:36):
Been through so much shit when it comes to the
comments and being hated from back in the day that
I know the best thing to do is to turn
to delete the app and keep going. And when she
started getting death threats, oh that was different.
Speaker 3 (32:54):
That was different.
Speaker 5 (32:54):
When she started getting death threats, I was like, you
can literally not do anything.
Speaker 3 (32:58):
Can I just tell you why I was getting death threats?
The whole thing started because.
Speaker 4 (33:03):
I was asked on Kiki Palmer's podcast by Kiki if
I'd ever watched if I watched that So Raven growing
up as a kid, and I said no, I didn't.
Actually I've seen all of it since.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
We've been together. I love it. I think the show
is fantastic. But I didn't watch it growing up.
Speaker 4 (33:19):
And.
Speaker 5 (33:21):
The internet world went crazy, and so I'm used to
dissociating and putting it away because you're not who I
speak to at Starbucks, and if you are, I dare
you to say something to my face. So there was
a moment where I had to speak up. But you know,
being from the generation that a comment is the end
(33:42):
all be all, or if somebody comments or doesn't like
a picture, you're not popular.
Speaker 6 (33:47):
The world is ending. I'm not from that generation.
Speaker 5 (33:49):
I don't care. I love it, Thanks for thanks so much.
But what matters is if these suits on the twenty
first floor hire me and I do my job, That's
what matters. And so now, oh, my wife is really
starting to understand that. And I remember saying to her,
I'm like, did that prevent you from having these five
pitch meetings and selling a show?
Speaker 3 (34:09):
Did that comment.
Speaker 5 (34:10):
Change anything in your life other than your mental state
because you read it and you think that someone's going happy.
Speaker 3 (34:15):
Did the Amazon packages stop being delivered?
Speaker 2 (34:18):
Oh, I'm obsessed?
Speaker 3 (34:20):
Did it stop? I was like, no, that's true, it off.
Speaker 2 (34:25):
Is it fucking with your money? Here to be a period?
Speaker 1 (34:28):
But I turned my comments. I am what you need
to know about me. Besides, I'm head to toe tattoos
and I look a certain way. I am a gentle, soft,
squishy teddy bear. I had to turn my fucking comments off.
I'll never open those things back up.
Speaker 3 (34:44):
Nope, you can't do it.
Speaker 5 (34:46):
It's another It's another part of the game that we
don't have to play that gives them a chance to interact.
And if you allow them, if you allow those comments
to interact with you, you're.
Speaker 3 (34:57):
Not being your best self. You know.
Speaker 5 (35:00):
That's another form of bullying. But those people get excitement
from it. So I'm all I'm from the mindset, and
I told her. I was like, the more haters you have,
the more.
Speaker 6 (35:08):
Clout you have.
Speaker 3 (35:08):
Let the hate. I don't care, but it's about it's
about how you interact with that hate that matters.
Speaker 4 (35:14):
One of the craziest things, though, when it comes to
headlines or videos that I ever saw, and I showed
this to Raven, somebody made like a news report, oh
my god video that was like on TikTok about us
having a public fight in a in a restaurant and
the quote was Raven simone storms out of restaurant and yells,
(35:38):
yells to wife. Stop talking to me that way. I'm
not your slave, and that like in the in the thing,
it's like AI generated. It's like Randa was yelling at
Raven Raven through glass of water, like this whole explanation
of this fight that we had had at a restaurant
we've never been to in our lives, like it was.
Speaker 5 (35:58):
That was good, but again the AI generated content because
hate brings eye.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Clicks, clicks clicks.
Speaker 1 (36:07):
No one's out here being like, oh, the greatest love
story of all time, only only J did that. That's
so sorry, bless bless you.
Speaker 5 (36:21):
Really that was a you guys.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
Gave it to me.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
I really tease you up for that.
Speaker 3 (36:30):
That was really funny.
Speaker 1 (36:36):
This is wide open and I'm your host, Ashlyn Harris.
Thanks for listening.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
We'll be right back. I will say this, Raven.
Speaker 1 (36:48):
I saw a birthday message that you recently put up,
and you were like, I want you to live forever,
like a million years, like you were being so sweet
and so and.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
It's interesting because.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
Sophia and I say this all the time, I want
you to live forever, and I'm curious. I want you
to elaborate a little more on it, because I do
think it has taken so much for all of us
to get to where we are right now, and the
way we move in the world, and how we show
up for ourselves and our partners and the safety and
(37:25):
like the love that we feel in these sacred spaces.
I can only say, like, I'm so at peace. Time
is one thing money can't buy, and it's so unpredicted,
and I want to live in this happiness, in this
peace forever and ever and ever, because I'm finally getting
(37:48):
what I saw on movies that I always was like,
Oh that shit doesn't exist in real life, and I'm
like living it and I can't selfishly. I just want more.
I want more. I want more. I want more. And
I'm wondering if you said that because you resonate like
you resonate with it and you feel that finally getting
(38:08):
that type of love you've always wanted, Like do we
share that together? Or am I getting like emotionally deep
and like, nah.
Speaker 3 (38:16):
Girl, Ashlynn, you said it perfectly.
Speaker 5 (38:20):
However, the reason I did that was because my wife
really likes Instagram posts for her for something else and
I'm just playing, but I.
Speaker 3 (38:26):
Was like a little bit of a dick. That's my
that's my shicks.
Speaker 1 (38:31):
That shows that's that shows a healthy sign of a relationship.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
Let me tell you.
Speaker 5 (38:35):
Look, because honey, I said it for a different I
said it for a couple of reasons. I'm gonna tell
the truth, and I'm gonna tell the deeper, subconscious one.
Speaker 3 (38:43):
The truth is my wife has health.
Speaker 5 (38:45):
Anxiety, and I really want to make sure she knows
that she is not leaving this planet before me. She
always says I have to leave for I'm like, that's
not happening. You're I'm staying longer than you, and you're healthy.
I'm super healthy. I know you are so much better.
I know, but I haven't, but I did the last
time I posted.
Speaker 3 (39:03):
That's what was from my birthday in August.
Speaker 5 (39:06):
Yes, you just got the plates instructor a great way.
She's a Plotti's genius or whatever. And then the other
side of it is I agree with everything that you
just said, Ashlynn. I actually had this comment. I'm doing
a documentary about my I'm not doing it. Robin Roberts
is doing a documentary about my life. And I had
the conversation just yesterday about how just really just regurgitating
(39:32):
what you said, but growing up in Atlanta and working
for as long as I have in the industry, only
having Ellen DeGeneres and barely Paula Poundstone and secretly Whitney Houston.
There were no and Chaz Bono that was a plus,
but there were no signs that the life that I'm
(39:55):
living right now is actually possible. What I thought was
going to happen was that I was going to marry
a man, and I was gonna buy two houses, one
that he lives in and then one that my woman
lives in, and I was just gonna go between the
two houses if somebody needed to take a picture, I'd
be with him. But then he knew that he can
do whatever you wanted to. And I was gonna like
that's I planned that shit out. I had properties. It
(40:17):
was just I was gonna be And yesterday when I
was talking to one of the producers at the Dock,
I was saying that I'm literally in a dream state
to where if this like it's kind of unhealthy because
it hasn't saturated in my skin yet.
Speaker 3 (40:33):
It's still it still feels like some.
Speaker 5 (40:35):
Days I have to wake up be like, yo, I
got married period period to a woman.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
That's crazy.
Speaker 6 (40:41):
That's crazy.
Speaker 5 (40:42):
And I'm out here talking about it and people like,
see me for it. It's some days it doesn't click in,
it doesn't sink in. Some days I'm in it fully
and I'm like, yeah, let's look at this beautiful moment.
And then some days I'm like, uh, do people know?
But that's my own personal mental sickness. But it's true.
It's like I do want her. I want her to
(41:03):
thrive past life, you know what I mean? Like, I
want her soul to be so happy this go round
that when she's in her next soul, she doesn't think
that she was tortured in a in a castle, and
then she can she can. That's another conversation, that she
can live so peacefully now because I know my wife's
history and I want her to be happy. So yeah,
(41:24):
And a lot of the times I write those messages
and I'm like, what are the things that I don't
say out loud enough? Because I was raised by guys,
so my verbal love and communication is a little different.
Speaker 1 (41:37):
No, I feel that I get the I get the comment.
Often when I'm getting too serious or too specific and
too direct, it's sweetheart, we're not in the locker room.
Please do not talk to me like I'm your teammate,
I'm a different kind of teammate. Yeah, and I have
to like, I got it, I'm in I'm a dial.
Speaker 4 (41:58):
Yeah, And that's a good reminder. And I think that
that's also a good way to maybe communicate, Like I
could be a better communicator in those moments instead of
just saying, don't talk to me that way, or I
don't like that to be like I'm not a kid
on a set that you're directing right now, you know
what I mean, Like I don't remember who I am. Yeah,
(42:21):
and that that'll click in and I'll say it to
you too.
Speaker 3 (42:25):
This has been such good therapy.
Speaker 2 (42:27):
Well, I think you're welcome, man, I'm for free. Yeah,
imagine that it's accessible here.
Speaker 3 (42:32):
Truly. We're gonna have to do this weekly, I guess.
Speaker 2 (42:35):
So what's next for you both? I mean you you
you're just you're.
Speaker 1 (42:39):
The best, and you're both highly successful and super creative.
And I know you're starting Did you start already the
production company?
Speaker 3 (42:48):
Yes, you started it. Yes, we started it.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
We are Curs Pictures.
Speaker 3 (42:53):
Yeah, look at.
Speaker 1 (42:54):
Me go I know, okay, research, Yeah, I don't miss any.
Speaker 5 (43:02):
We are currently in the process of pitching creating and
aligning with a lot of different podcasts and constantly just
moving forward.
Speaker 3 (43:12):
But the baby that is now a.
Speaker 5 (43:16):
Toddler, I think we should we can say now that
we feed most Formula two is the podcast.
Speaker 4 (43:22):
Okay, yeah, Time slow performance. I don't know, maybe we're
on solids now, Tea. Time is really my baby. This
is true, and I really put a lot of attention
and energy into it.
Speaker 3 (43:37):
But also, I mean, we have some great projects in
our production company, Raven. You have so much going on, babes.
I know, I have so much going on.
Speaker 5 (43:43):
I'm writing a book, I'm writing my memoir, the doc
that I talked about a little bit earlier.
Speaker 3 (43:48):
Yes, a few things.
Speaker 5 (43:50):
And you know, for those in the industry who know
when you create something and try to sell it, that's
such a slow process.
Speaker 2 (43:56):
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 5 (43:57):
Yes, So that's why there hasn't really been a big
it because we also want to make sure that we
come out with the right project and we align with
the right people and the industry right now in.
Speaker 3 (44:06):
The buying field is so good.
Speaker 6 (44:08):
Old boys, Buddy, Buddy and.
Speaker 3 (44:10):
You and Sophia, we're just on to set together.
Speaker 5 (44:12):
Oh yeah, I'm shadowing Debbiel I was shadowing debbiel And and
multiple directors over at Grace Super sweet.
Speaker 2 (44:19):
Such a good group too. God, there's just great people
over there.
Speaker 3 (44:23):
They work like a machine.
Speaker 5 (44:24):
I really want to try my my handed directing for
you like that. But I'm doing a movie and producing
a movie. I'm in some and yeah, we're constantly Listen,
we gotta work a mean listen.
Speaker 1 (44:38):
I feel that in my bones. I mean it's like
around the clock all the time.
Speaker 4 (44:42):
Now.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
What do you do though, when it's just like when
it's just you two, Like what fills your cup up
these days, especially with like how heavy things are and
how how much you both work and how public you are, Like, what,
what's just for the both of you?
Speaker 3 (44:56):
Massages? We love going, oh massages.
Speaker 4 (45:00):
Yes, I honestly just love a slow day with you.
Like this past weekend, we had a few errands to
run with that we were driving by. We passed a
little farmer's market and we just spontaneously stopped and popped in,
and then we ran the rest of our little errands
and we just hung out at home and the rest
of the day made some food, talked, watched TV. I
(45:24):
think we got massages like those days where there's just
kind of nothing but us and we can just hang
and talk and reconnect our my faves.
Speaker 3 (45:35):
Raven is a painter and I love it.
Speaker 4 (45:37):
Oh yeah, she's amazing and she'll sometimes sneak away into
the back house and paint and I love just like
going back there with her and either watching her work
or doing a little something myself.
Speaker 2 (45:51):
We will binge a show, though, we like, no matter what.
Speaker 6 (45:56):
At eight o'clock, not.
Speaker 5 (45:57):
All phones, but most phones are gone and we are
consuming content YouTube HBO.
Speaker 3 (46:05):
Who like we.
Speaker 2 (46:07):
It's the latest? What's the latest? We're in two?
Speaker 4 (46:10):
Okay, so we finished the Diplomat. We finished Tasks last
night just for the hell of it. We watched Don't
Say a Word, Call Douglas and Brittany Murphy. That's such
a good movie from two thousand and what it was
thousand and two, which is crazy fantastic.
Speaker 3 (46:25):
We're on Searching Sister Wife.
Speaker 5 (46:27):
Oh, I finished Pull Dark, but oh we haven't finished Wayward,
but now we're almost done with that.
Speaker 1 (46:33):
Yeah, ooh, so you jump around, you don't stay consistent.
Speaker 5 (46:38):
Oh no, we we don't like. I'll binge a show
like I'll wake up at four o'clock in the morning.
And watch the stuff that she doesn't like.
Speaker 4 (46:46):
We watched like, so this is a mixture of reality,
this is a mixture of obviously scripted. Then we'll go
back in the catalog just for fun. But we both,
like I said earlier, in this conversation, we can talk
about the entertainment industry and movie film and I think
that that's very much me living out my relationship with
my dad because my father was in the industry, and
(47:09):
the majority of my conversation the only thing that I
can connect with him on was.
Speaker 3 (47:14):
TV movies and the industry.
Speaker 4 (47:17):
So when we get into that loop together, it's great
because we're like picking things apart. Why did they do that? Oh,
it's so well written. How did they shoot that? Oh
my gosh, well rewind rewatch figure it out the delivery.
It's very rare too that we watch something that we
get so sucked into that we're not analyzing it and
breaking it down.
Speaker 1 (47:35):
So what I want to do, by the way, is
just end with a few let's end on a light note.
So I'm going to ask just a few fire like
rapid fire things. You can be truthful, you can be light.
You can say get the fuck out of he or
I'm not answering that you're wild, but yeah, and then
we'll end the show on a light note, as we've
(47:57):
been dropping, you know, dimes on couple's therapy.
Speaker 2 (48:03):
Done all right? Who made the first move?
Speaker 3 (48:07):
You opened a fucking whole bag of wine. I know
this is a We fight about this all the time.
We can't agree, but don't don't. It was me?
Speaker 1 (48:18):
Okay, who's the Who's the one that usually starts the fight?
Speaker 2 (48:23):
The argument.
Speaker 3 (48:25):
Again? Another can of worms?
Speaker 5 (48:26):
Because because here's why before she answers, because it's about tone,
and it's about that one little word that switches that
the person who actually starts the fight doesn't know they
started it, because then you trigger. So I'm a reactor
and she is also a reactor.
Speaker 1 (48:44):
It's fifty all right, deal, favorite time to get freaky?
Speaker 2 (48:49):
Are you? Sunriser? Nighttime?
Speaker 3 (48:51):
Nighttime?
Speaker 6 (48:52):
Morning Woo?
Speaker 2 (48:53):
Who's the big spoon?
Speaker 5 (48:56):
She wants to be so bad? And I hate it
and I let her get it sometimes, but I like anymore.
Speaker 2 (49:00):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (49:02):
If your sex life was like a title, like a
movie title, what would it be?
Speaker 3 (49:09):
This is so fucked up?
Speaker 2 (49:10):
I love it.
Speaker 3 (49:11):
I love it so ridiculous. I've never don it Okay
a movie title. This is fun. Give us a second.
Speaker 2 (49:18):
Yeah, okay, this is this is.
Speaker 1 (49:20):
So good.
Speaker 2 (49:25):
The writer of the group. Come on, director, listen, the
things in my.
Speaker 3 (49:30):
Head are ridiculous.
Speaker 5 (49:32):
I'm gonna say, do a Nancy Myers movie.
Speaker 3 (49:39):
A Nancy Myers movie. It's complicated, great fatal attraction. Don't
say a word.
Speaker 1 (49:50):
Like perfect lights on her, off, lights on her, off,
lights on or off off.
Speaker 3 (49:57):
I like it. I like it on Beyonce, Oh my.
Speaker 2 (50:00):
God, Sophia does too. She's like, girl, I'm like, turn
these fucking lights off, and she's like, I want to
see you.
Speaker 3 (50:05):
No, and I don't want her to see me. So
I don't know how to make it work. Okay, yeah,
and I like it dark.
Speaker 4 (50:12):
But if we have to have a light then it
needs to be like a warm beauty ringe.
Speaker 2 (50:18):
I'm sexy. We're keeping it sexy.
Speaker 3 (50:20):
Yes, okay.
Speaker 2 (50:22):
Which queer stereotype? Do you absolutely live up.
Speaker 3 (50:25):
To the soft butch I mean the u hauling of
it all? That's true. We totally did that. We created
we reinvented it on a homely level.
Speaker 2 (50:40):
I love it. Do you have a queer celebrity crush?
Speaker 3 (50:44):
Hmmm? No, I have a straight celebrity.
Speaker 2 (50:47):
Oh okay, look that's.
Speaker 3 (50:49):
A stereotype of Lizzie.
Speaker 2 (50:51):
Yeah, there we go.
Speaker 3 (50:52):
Always loves a straight girl. Yeah, I mean we do.
Speaker 2 (50:55):
Tell me, tell me who, tell me who? Come on,
drop those those bombs.
Speaker 5 (50:59):
Okay, So I can't remember her name, but the younger
sister from the show Vita, which is a great show,
also a queer show.
Speaker 6 (51:11):
I think she's canceled though.
Speaker 3 (51:16):
She's gonna be distant. Just tell her, doesn't think, tell
her the true one. She doesn't.
Speaker 5 (51:20):
She doesn't have a queer crush on a queer person
on a guy.
Speaker 3 (51:25):
Oh well, it's consistent. I think.
Speaker 4 (51:31):
I just think that Charlie Hundham is like just beautiful.
We saw him in an airport. He made my knee
like bend at you.
Speaker 2 (51:38):
Yeah, you were like you get what you got those
wonky ass knees.
Speaker 3 (51:41):
Yeah he knows, he knows.
Speaker 4 (51:44):
He looked at me and he winked like he literally
fucking knows the power that he wields.
Speaker 3 (51:48):
And I was just like her guy.
Speaker 4 (51:53):
But I mean, there's definitely I see the one that
I really want to say that we existed for a
long time. She's so insane right now, I'm kind of
like I.
Speaker 3 (52:03):
Just said one that was canceled. Have to match the
I could do. I could totally do it as like
bet Porter. That was my I was obsessed with that Porter. Give.
Speaker 4 (52:18):
We just saw her recently in an event. She still
looks at Revels and she looks like that Porter.
Speaker 2 (52:23):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (52:24):
If you were trapped on a desert island and you
can only bring one queer essential.
Speaker 2 (52:29):
What would it be?
Speaker 3 (52:31):
One queer essential?
Speaker 1 (52:33):
We're talking glitter Lube Indigo Girls soundtrack, like, I don't
know you you picked hilarious.
Speaker 3 (52:41):
I'm gonna be really honest. I'm bringing sun block. I
don't know if that's queer or straight. That's that's straight, that's.
Speaker 2 (52:47):
Very that's some straight ship that I love.
Speaker 3 (52:50):
Guys, I have to bring it, okay.
Speaker 2 (52:52):
I would be like chapstick, you know I need.
Speaker 3 (52:55):
Yeah, that's weird. I would bring chapstick too. I'm bringing
my pocket, my pocket pleasure.
Speaker 5 (53:02):
Hey baybe Gray, No, no, no, no, not that one.
Speaker 2 (53:07):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (53:08):
Well, listen, you both are a dream. Thank you for
coming on you, thank.
Speaker 3 (53:13):
You for having us, and we hope you come on ours.
Speaker 2 (53:15):
I would love that. I would love that You're never
getting rid of me. This is the way it works.
We're fast friends. We friends. You haul too, So I'll
be in LA in two weeks and I'll be hello,
she's home.
Speaker 3 (53:30):
The top picture here. I hope that you're serious. Hold on,
I opened it.
Speaker 1 (53:38):
I really opened the door there, Up, I.
Speaker 3 (53:42):
Really, I really hope.
Speaker 4 (53:44):
I am curious because we need lesbian friend lesbian fri death.
Speaker 2 (53:50):
Listen, I am listen, I am in Well. It's so
good to see you both.
Speaker 1 (53:55):
Thank you so much for coming on Wide Open, and
thank you for so real and honest and continuing to
show up and move the needle in our community. It's
really beautiful to watch and to see, so thank you both.
And yeah, everyone, thanks for tuning into Wide Open.
Speaker 2 (54:14):
Thank you Raven and Miranda.
Speaker 1 (54:16):
Thank you for showing us that love can be playful, grounded,
and deeply spiritual all at once. The kind of love
that feels earned, the kind that comes when you've done
the work and you actually know yourself. What you've built
together is proof that timing is everything. That sometimes we
don't find love we deserve until we finally are ready
(54:38):
to receive it. You've reminded me and everyone listening that
the most beautiful thing about love isn't in the perfection.
It's in the choosing, choosing each other, choosing joy, choosing forever,
even when forever isn't promised. I love you both dearly
and thank you for coming on Wide Open. We'll see
you next week. Wide Open with Ashland Harris is an
(55:07):
iHeart women's sports production. You can find us on the
iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Our producers are Carmen Borca Correo, Emily Maronoff, and Lucy Jones.
Production assistants from Malia Aguidello. Our executive producers are Jesse Katz,
(55:28):
Jenny Kaplan, and Emily Rudder. Our editors are Jenny Kaplan
and Emily Rudder and I'm your host Ashlin Harris
Today on Wide Open, I'm sitting down with two women
who've grown up, evolved, and loved in the public eye,
and have somehow managed to keep what matters most to
them just for themselves. Raven Simone, an icon who's been
on our screen since childhood, carrying generations of stories, laughter,
and expectation. And Miranda a Day, the brilliant, grounded force
(00:23):
beside her, helping shape what partnership and purpose look like
when you strip away the noise. We're talking about growing
up in the spotlight, healing old wounds, queerness, identity, and
the work it takes to build a love that actually lasts.
We'll get into what they protect, what they share, and
what they've learned about sex and identity, what it really
(00:45):
means to find love you've always dreamed of later in
life when you're ready to receive it. We'll talk about
their production company, the stories they want to tell next,
and the beautiful gut punch moment that Raven said you
wanted Miranda to live forever, because when you finally found
your person, the hardest part is knowing time isn't infinite.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
This one's about.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
Love, legacy, and building a life that feels like home.
Let's get wide open. Raven Miranda, thank you so much
for being here today on Wide Open.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
How are you?
Speaker 3 (01:31):
We are well, doing very well.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
That's a loaded question right now, but at least we're here,
We're alive, we're healthy, and we're enjoying this space together today.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
So I feel lucky.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
You got to start with the good things.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
We got to start with the good things before we
fucking get in there and start hammering down what this
political landscape actually is right now now I'm kidding. He's
not a political podcast, but we will talk shit.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
Okay, great, that's fair. We can do that. We kind
of suck out, but talking shit we thrive.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
Yeah, we just go listen.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
It has been so fun to follow your journey. I
love the podcast. I love your relationship. It is so genuine,
so sweet. It's been really you know, we've never met
before and this is like new homie experience, but I
do feel like I know you both just from how
you show up in the world and the visibility aspect.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
You know, I really appreciate and it's a it's a
vulnerable thing these days to really live your truth. So
I appreciate you both being here.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
Thank you.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
That's so kind, We are really happy to be here.
And also same because we've seen you and Sophia out
and about in certain places and we're always.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
Like, oh my god, hi you guys.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
And I love just how you two have shared and
let people in and you know your your entire journey
honestly before even meeting Sophia, and so thank you for
your busines ability as well.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
Oh well, you're so sweet. We got to do a
double date when we're in lad.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
It's so great.
Speaker 5 (03:05):
Could you bring that hat and just leave it with
me when we do that double date because I guess.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
This is going to be my new gift to you.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
I just got it, so I will gladly regift it
to you when I get to La. We're doing We're
we're hosting a friends giving, which you will have an
invite of course.
Speaker 4 (03:23):
Oh well, because we've been going back and forth about
what we're going to do for the holidays, and we
decided listen, we're a married couple. We're allowed to say
we get to start our own traditions. Now. We don't
have to be like bouncing from family to family and
thinking like this parent is going to be pissed, so
let's do it. Ourselves and figure out what we want
(03:44):
that to look like. So that's that's so nice to
know that we have an invitation somewhere too.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
Though.
Speaker 1 (03:49):
Listen, it's going to be very gay, it's going to
be very safe. We're going to talk a lot of
shit because that's what we do. We're going to laugh
through the chaos because what else at this point can
we do. But yeah, I actually am I'm so aligned
because you know, back in the day when I used
to I come from a military background, so I can
(04:13):
only imagine what my Thanksgiving would be like walking in
now and seeing if Fox News was on the TV
and I have zero filter, so that it would absolutely
be a nightmare and a disaster for everyone involved. Because
I feel like at this point I'm a wrecking ball
and I just need to tell everyone how I feel.
Speaker 4 (04:33):
I feel like you'd end up leaving with like mapped
potatoes on your face, greavy like on your pants, because
there would have been a food fight.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
Yeah, they're gonna say, you know what, You're not welcome anymore,
get that hell out of here.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
And I'm like, don't worry. I moved away from Florida
very quickly for a reason.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Oh yeah, Wow.
Speaker 5 (04:50):
Yeah, we have those family members too that sit on
the opposite side of the aisle, and it is a
delicate dance when having those conversations, not even at family dinners,
it's also a delicate dance just on an every day
especially when the phone ring, just when the phone rings,
just when you get a quick little TikTok or an
ex from one of our parents, and it's just like,
(05:11):
thanks for that information. You know, that's my community, right, Yeah,
it's really fun.
Speaker 3 (05:16):
It's for me.
Speaker 5 (05:18):
It's a masterclass and patience and empathy and letting everyone
have their say and trying my best not to cuss
them out.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
Gosh, it's like we all struggle with the same shit.
I love it. It's like you're speaking to my core
right now.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
But I want to know how you guys, like how
you met, how this actual? I mean, you've been married
now what five years. It's been so beautiful to watch
because Raven, I remember at one point you were being
very private about your life. You were like, listen, I
live that shit. You guys are wild. I'm out, I'm
(05:54):
protecting my peace. And now I feel like there's been,
you know, over the years, a pretty massive shift in
the best way, because your visibility together has been so
influential and impactful for our queer community.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Like what was that big shift?
Speaker 5 (06:13):
Okay, so that's a two part question. I'm gonna let
her answer the first part and then I'll come into mind.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
Okay, let's do it. So how we met.
Speaker 4 (06:19):
We met at a karaoke night Raven was hosting.
Speaker 3 (06:23):
I was there with a.
Speaker 4 (06:24):
Few friends and we ended up talking to each other
at the bar and I just was like, I'm going
to know this person.
Speaker 3 (06:32):
I really felt this connection.
Speaker 4 (06:33):
It was easy and fun and conversational, and as she
was leaving, she invited me to a house party she
was throwing the following weekend, and at that moment, in
my mind, I was like, Okay, but if I'm going
to go to your house party, I'm going to have
to have a date with you before.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
Like that was just the order of operations in my head.
So she gave.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
Me your number, and then that week we went on
a one on one date and ended up talking, and
true in fashion, we talked for like ten hours in
the car.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
We didn't even leave the car. We just talked about everything,
and I remember just being overwhelmed with our conversation.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
And thinking, oh my gosh, it's incredible that I can
talk to somebody about everything from show tunes and the
entertainment industry to these deep traumas and this psychological stuff
that also I really enjoy discussing. And we just hit
all the boxes and I knew at that moment, I
really was like, this is my person. Went to her
(07:33):
house party and then during this week of time she
was leaving to go to the View, so she was
only in LA for about two weeks. And after her
house party, she came and stayed with me for four
days because her house was all packed up and crashed.
Speaker 3 (07:47):
My house was trash.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Yeah you haul in?
Speaker 3 (07:50):
Yeah, Oh my gosh, super u hauling. Because over those
four days, she was like, Hey, if.
Speaker 4 (07:56):
I were to buy you a ticket to New York
to come on this can trip with me and my friends,
Like would you come? And I remember thinking, no, I
won't because I don't really know you and I have
a job in like life and.
Speaker 3 (08:09):
You're fine, come on, And literally that's what she said,
and I ended up going.
Speaker 4 (08:13):
She got me a one way ticket that was end
of August. I didn't come home until the first of October,
and then I know we were terrible and then I
moved back to Neruble. Just in terms of how fast
we moved, I mean it was crazy.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
That's that's real slow.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
That's yeah exactly.
Speaker 1 (08:33):
It's funny you say that because every single holiday birthday
that Sophia's friends like for her.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
It's always a U Haul hat, it's always a U
Haul shirt.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
It's always like she dipped her pinky toe in and
she was like, I am diving into this pool.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
I am done. Put a bow on it, like same thing.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
I was like, honey, I live in New York. You
live in l She has not been back. She has
not been back. She's like, I don't care.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
I'm done. I'm done. This is good, this is oh.
I haven't searched my whole life for this. I'm going
nowhere strapping.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Good for her, strap in and strap up.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
Okay, but yeah, it's it's magical when all of that aligns,
and you know, and I just had to deal with
see you're on board.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Raven broke up with me, and then I had to.
Speaker 5 (09:25):
She she the question was, the question is how we met,
how we broke up? Okay, sorry, every time the question
is how we met? And now is my time to answer,
but you told the whole story about having met, so
let me get into my section. So to answer your
question about just privacy, you know, my whole life, I
was really taught that you're not supposed to really share
(09:45):
your public You're not supposed to share your private with
your public, because sometimes that can overshadow the work. I
grew up in the time of you know, the National
Inquirer and you know people, and when relationships really did
outshine people's product and content. So multiple NDAs with a
lot of people met her and tried to get her
(10:07):
to sign an NDA reluctant, but did.
Speaker 4 (10:12):
And then it's so sad to me. Sorry to interrupt you,
but it was sad to me because it felt all
of a sudden like this and I understand it, but
it felt like a business negotiation and something. And I
was and I was, I love you, and at that
point that was such a foreign idea to me to
have to kind of I was also like, what do
you think I would do if we were to break up?
(10:33):
You think I'm going to go like run to some
publisher and be like, let me give you a tell all?
And I just that, But that's not It's so far
from who I am.
Speaker 3 (10:40):
I couldn't. I do understand that a lot of people
have done that. It's a lot of people have lied
on people, and you know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (10:49):
And I just you know, my parents were very very
adamant about me protecting my life and especially being gay.
That was even more to me something that my parents
did didn't even know about. But for me, it was like, Okay,
at the time, this could be quote unquote dangerous to
come out. Nobody should know this because the culture that
I grew up in, it wasn't as open as it
(11:11):
is now. So when we got married, I was still
under the impression that were won't be quiet. But I
knew that when I did marry. Before I met her,
I knew that when I married, I would be more
comfortable telling truths about my relationship because there is a
contract that there are things that can be said, that
(11:32):
things that can it's not just a girlfriend or it's
not just a boyfriend, to where you know, you got
to think about it a little bit longer before you
leave me, yes, exactly. And so you know, she was
really gung ho for getting out there and doing lives
with me and us sharing our relationship and she made
me feel comfortable. So and it's fun to be able
(11:54):
to just show what a lesbian marriage looks like, even
though it just looks like a normal marriage. But I
think that some people need to have certain titles to
make it seem like, ooh, that's what you guys do,
and like, yeah, we bicker and have a good time
at the science.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
We're normal people. Welcome to the party, honey.
Speaker 4 (12:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
Yeah, it's interesting that you say that, because I you
did grow up with the world watching and when you
look back, like, what parts of that little girl have
you worked so hard to protect and reclaim In this
new identity of just being like so happy, you just
(12:29):
seem so vibrant, so light. It's it's really you don't
have to know you for that long just to see
the way you're moving in the world.
Speaker 6 (12:39):
Oh, thank you very much. Now that's a loaded question
for me.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
Sorry, I figured right off the top of the show.
Let's go listen.
Speaker 6 (12:48):
It's fine, it's fine.
Speaker 3 (12:50):
How would you? And that's hard for me.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
Because I think for you, it's it's an ongoing process. Yeah,
And what I've witnessed in Raven, let's say, over the
ten plus years I've known her, now is the raven
that I met back in twenty fifteen was extremely guarded,
(13:15):
even though she seemed so open to me. What I've
realized now is the different There are such different pockets
of who she is and how she maneuvers, how she expressed. Yeah,
and she's a master of disassociation.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
Which I association.
Speaker 5 (13:34):
Remember my therapist said, it's not disassociation, it's dissociation.
Speaker 4 (13:37):
Okay, she's a master of dissociation. And that was also
a protection. That was a defense mechanism into place because
of my childhood, because of her childhood, for sure. But
what I've seen you do and work on recently is
letting that little girl actually have a voice, because I
(13:59):
think she'd never had one. And I see you giving
space for those little girl feelings to surface and show up,
and then also you.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
Are able to better.
Speaker 4 (14:11):
Parent and love that little that part of you I
think that didn't get what she needed.
Speaker 5 (14:16):
So to piggyback on that, to answer verbatim, what part
of me am I protecting? I've protected the little girl
and the middle school girl my whole life, like they've
always been in a box somewhere, so that the industry
or anyone around me couldn't touch them, and they were
always banging on the door. Only recently have I remembered
(14:38):
where I placed that key and allow, But there were
so many different masks that got hit with all of
the Hollywood bs over the years that the little girl
was just like, what's happening?
Speaker 3 (14:51):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (14:52):
So I think it's really beautiful that you both. I mean,
clearly you both do the work. I mean, it's very evident.
But I think what's so beautiful and what I don't
think people talk about enough is and Sophia and I
talk about this at length all the time. She is
(15:16):
such a beautiful human that has grown up in the
public eye and it has broken her in so many
ways that she is highly anxious. She cares way too
much about what people think, and she's very very, very
very highly sensitive. And I don't weaponize that. I actually
(15:40):
care for it. And I think, Miranda, that's exactly what
you're saying, Like she carries this history, and I imagine
finding each other has been such a pivotal moment in
both of your lives that you care for each other's
scars in a way that is beautiful.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
Where most people can weaponize.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
Most people are like, don't bring that baggage into this, Like,
I don't, that's old. It's not my job to unpack it.
But I actually highly disagree. I think we all are
a work in progress, and we all have a lot
of trauma and grief we carry, and I think the
most beautiful relationships care for that in a very sacred
(16:25):
way that helps them walk that life even though there's
broken pieces of it. Would you agree?
Speaker 5 (16:33):
You're so fantastic because I'm the person who's like, don't
bring that baggage in here?
Speaker 3 (16:38):
What are you doing?
Speaker 6 (16:39):
Why didn't I get fixed with the last relationship.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
We're adults.
Speaker 5 (16:42):
That's me, She's the sweetheart. I'm the one like, what
the fuck is happening right now? Well, I don't even
think it's I'm learning, though she is learning.
Speaker 4 (16:49):
I don't even think it's like being a sweetheart or
anything like that.
Speaker 3 (16:52):
I think it's really how you perceive in your relationships.
Speaker 4 (16:58):
And I think what you're saying, Ashon, I really am
aligned with because I think that when people commit to
each other, it is one of the most beautiful, life
changing things you can do to give space for another
person to show up as themselves truly, and we say
(17:20):
these things all the time, but I think to really
understand that and really put it into practice is another
story and another conversation. And also understanding my belief that
is in relationship is that we're really just mirroring each other,
constantly mirroring each other, which means if I am triggered
by Raven, it has way less to do with Raven
(17:42):
than it has to do with me, And that discomfort
for me is data that's information for me to go
into on my own time to figure out.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
But to have a partner who's.
Speaker 4 (17:53):
Also willing to sit by your side, hold your hand,
be the stability, the love, the support that you might
not have ever received, to be the home if you will,
for you to then be the adult version of yourself
that might have to also play out the kid version
of yourself is the greatest gift we can, I think,
(18:16):
give each other, because you're allowing someone's space to heal
and become what I think is maybe the best version
of themselves. Yeah, and that's that's who could ask for
anything more.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Stay tuned. I'll be back in just a moment. After
this brief message from our sponsors. I have listened to
a lot of your interviews, and both of you do
talk about having such an open line of communication and
so much honesty in this new version of who you
(18:55):
are and your relationship. I know, Raven, you spoke about
when Miranda. I don't know if it was something about,
you know, having separate bedrooms or having those hard kind
of conversations.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Where did that? Did it take time to get there?
Speaker 3 (19:13):
She loves you right.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
Now, we just we're in therapy. If you don't know,
she'd always.
Speaker 6 (19:19):
Her love language girl, and I'm just like no.
Speaker 3 (19:25):
I will say that. I will start it like this.
Speaker 5 (19:28):
I grew up in my house, she grew up in
her house, and our parenting styles, our parents' parenting styles
are extremely different. And with that extreme from both sides
of the line, my harsh tone, aggressive nature, and right
(19:49):
to the point conversation was probably a little bit harming
at the beginning because I grew up in a family
where it's like go pick up the shoes, Okay, I
did it great, That's what you're supposed to do.
Speaker 6 (20:03):
Keep going like it wasn't a oh you did such
a good job.
Speaker 5 (20:07):
That came when you did something excellent, and that informed
me on how to be in relationships where it's just like,
I need you to do that real quick, thanks much,
And they're like, well, not her, but other partners were like, well,
do I get some love after it.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
I'm like, that's a shit's supposed to do. I don't
know what's going on.
Speaker 5 (20:23):
So working with her and mirroring her, I've learned how
to be a little bit softer, a little bit, you know,
not as aggressive. But at the same time, all we
have always.
Speaker 3 (20:34):
Told the truth to each other.
Speaker 5 (20:35):
We have always been in a relationship for the ten
hours that we met the first day, where we just
knew that talking was important. And I think after we
got married maybe it felt a little bit more like, oh, okay,
do I have to put on my soft gloves again?
Because this is not for me. This is not something
(20:57):
I can run away from. This is someone that's going
to be with me forever. How do I then communicate
the best way for her to understand? And there was
a long time where it would be like, Okay, how
do I say this in order for you to understand
my language? Because we speak different languages, you know what
I mean? And so I think that's a constant even today,
with the growth that we have had, I sometimes catch
(21:19):
myself going back into my old way of a could
you do this real quick, and then forgetting like, oh sorry, babes,
love you.
Speaker 6 (21:24):
Can you did such a good job. I love you
so much.
Speaker 3 (21:26):
Can you do this? But I'm being extreme with it.
Speaker 4 (21:30):
I think for me, what's been interesting is I came
into almost every single relationship I've ever had with set
ideas that are very much built from the heterosexual world
number one. And I also had a lot of fear
(21:50):
around relationships because of my abandonment issues. So I understood
that and I made this commitment to myself. I was like,
I am not going to have what happened to my
parents happened to me, and that meant get divorced or
be in an unhappy relationship. And I know that sometimes
(22:11):
divorce can actually be a positive thing for people, but
I really like, had this just this clear idea that
by the time I decided to get married, I was
going to be really sure that I was with the
right person I could build my life with.
Speaker 3 (22:23):
So unfortunately I didn't.
Speaker 4 (22:27):
Really do the work before to position myself in a
way where I was secure enough in myself to start
building from that space, Because I think if I was
secure in myself those ideas, those fears wouldn't have been
so all consuming. So I came into my relationship with
Raven or our marriage with a lot of the same
(22:48):
issues I had as a girlfriend, which were being abandoned,
being not worthy, not lovable. If I wasn't validated consistently,
then something was the matter, and that meant I had
fucked something up and blah blah blah.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
So what I really had to.
Speaker 4 (23:03):
Learn was our relationship, like she said, language and understanding,
like specifically the separate bedroom thing. For me, you'd ask
me that three years ago, I would have had the
tape in my head that I've heard most people say,
which is separate bedrooms, you're on the road to divorce.
That's oh my god, you're not having sex every night.
Well he's about to go and cheat on you. Don't
(23:26):
like That was the tape in my head. And what
I had to learn, and what Raven has helped me
with so much, is no, it's okay that we like
separate spaces.
Speaker 3 (23:35):
It's actually like helping us.
Speaker 4 (23:37):
That's helping us, And this is really all that matters,
is what happens for us. You know, what if we
can't have sex every night, because that is exhausting for us.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
That's okay, because when you it works for us. The
comparing and contrasting that I was stuck in in almost
every avenue of my life. I'm very much that person.
Oh my gosh, she's so much prettier than me. Oh
my gosh, she's so much more fit. She's blah blah blah.
That lived in my relationship. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 5 (24:04):
That partner is posting all the time about this there.
Oh my god, the posting hilarious. If I didn't post
for her birthday, she'd be like, you don't love me.
I'm like, girl, I am up underneath your arm pit
the worst times.
Speaker 3 (24:14):
I love you so much. Yeah, Internet doesn't know. Nobody
gives them.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
But that's that's like I want to be in your skin, actually, yeah,
Like I don't.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
Want you on my Instagram. I need inside of your body.
Speaker 2 (24:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (24:26):
But I mean, those are the things I think that
are really difficult when you're just a human being existing
in this world and we have as much messaging as
we do, and have as many ideas telling us of
how we should be, what we should look like, what
our relationship should be like, how we should be exercising, eating.
I mean, it goes on and on and on. So
I think that when I boil it down, and we've
(24:46):
boiled it down, it is about being really honest with
each other, allowing uncomfortable things to happen. But all of
those things can happen because we have built a really
solid foundation. And when you know at a baseline that
you're with someone who has got your back and you're
safe with, then you can do the uncomfortable things.
Speaker 5 (25:06):
One of the things that I used to say in
the beginning of a relationship when things got heightened in
her anxiety and all this stuff started to flare up,
and be like, but I married you. Yeah, don't forget Yeah,
had I married yeah? But you didn't say this. This
is I'm like, but I married you. My problem in
the relationship was that I was too confident. I had
done so much work with all of my guys and
(25:26):
females beforehand, where I would sit there and be like,
you need space to do what you need to do.
I'll be here for you when you need the love
that I can give you. And that's how I functioned,
and with her she needed a lot more. So I
had to learn how to give her that and more.
What I mean is care and affection. Yeah, and I
had not had that prior to because I was just
(25:49):
letting everybody calm themselves down. But she also needed that
space to grow and to live. And then now we
can come together and be like, you want to get
the love that I want to give you at this
at this stage in our life.
Speaker 3 (26:02):
It's nice.
Speaker 6 (26:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:03):
And it's interesting because you've both been really intentional about
what you share and what you hold sacred.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
Do you how do you decide.
Speaker 1 (26:13):
What you plan to like share for the world on
your podcast or this is just like this is for us, babe,
this is like our piece, our safety, this is our home.
Speaker 5 (26:25):
I think that I can answer this question by saying,
when you have a connection with someone, there's a quiet communication.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
Yea.
Speaker 5 (26:34):
We don't have to talk about what we don't want
to talk about because we know that we're not.
Speaker 3 (26:37):
About to talk about that right now. Wan, it'll flare
us up.
Speaker 1 (26:42):
Yep.
Speaker 5 (26:42):
Y'all don't need to know because it's just like that's personal.
We know what's personal. We know it's not quiet communication
one percent. There are so many moments on the podcast
where we'll look.
Speaker 4 (26:52):
At each other and we both just know the face
and it's like, oh, wait, are you doing it?
Speaker 3 (26:57):
But it's like are you doing that? Are you going to? Oh,
we're doing this okay, and.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
We know I mean, they're just like you said, babe,
I think there are just are things we know that.
Speaker 5 (27:07):
We will never need to discuss publicly. But it took
a minute. It took a minute to figure that out.
Speaker 4 (27:14):
It started out for me because I am such an
open book, and I came from a space of the
more conversation the better. The more I can share stories
about things that I've experienced, then more people can maybe
potentially relate, then there's a greater dialogue. And I've had
to learn that that actually isn't true. Sometimes sometimes I
(27:37):
just feel like I've given way too much, opened up
way too much, and especially now publicly, you set yourself
up for so much more criticism, so much more so,
many more opportunities to be misunderstood. And something I really
admire about you, Ashon and Sophia too, in listening listening.
Speaker 3 (27:58):
To you to talk.
Speaker 4 (27:59):
You both are so oh eloquent. You're so well spoken
and so intentional, and sometimes I've listened to you both
and I'm like, fuck.
Speaker 3 (28:07):
I should have just said it like that, like that,
it was just so clean, And I have a lot
of like let your file.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
I do think it's I can only share from my experience.
And I'm the same way Miranda. I like to overshare
because when I share and I go on loop about things,
it minimizes the big feeling I feel inside. So I
have to talk about it, like my mental health journey,
my addiction journey, my trauma as a child, the decision
(28:37):
to leave my ex wife, and I feel that it's
important for me to talk about the things otherwise, Raven,
I'm very similar. I became a master at completely being
able to push things down and disassociate.
Speaker 3 (28:57):
And dissociate, dissociate.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
And I want to share my scars with this younger generation,
like I am imperfectly perfect in a lot of ways,
and I am broken in a lot of ways, And like,
I have to talk about these things.
Speaker 2 (29:12):
But I'm curious for you both, Like.
Speaker 1 (29:15):
What has the public gotten wrong about you two that
you've learned to just say fuck it, I'm letting this go.
There's nothing I can do to change what people think,
and God, they have it really wrong, and that's unfortunate.
Up well, is this the look we're talking about?
Speaker 4 (29:36):
This this look was Go ahead, babe, the floor is yours,
because you get.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
A lot more hate than I do.
Speaker 4 (29:44):
I think, man, I think what I've experienced that's been
really surprising is.
Speaker 3 (29:53):
Okay. When we got married, Raven.
Speaker 4 (29:58):
Kind of give me a quick you know this can
this might be difficult, This might be difficult. And when
one of the reasons that she broke up with me
was because she wasn't ready to be with a white person,
and I did not know that she was struggling with
any of those feelings while we were dating, which made
me sad when I found out because I felt like
(30:19):
I couldn't well, there's nothing I can.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
Do about it.
Speaker 7 (30:21):
What was she about to do? But also makeup, there's
nothing I can do about it. There's nothing I can
do about my whiteness. But I could have just been more.
Speaker 4 (30:31):
Aware of what my partner was going through and maybe
supported her better that in some way. No, yeah, no,
I think I've just been surprised by how many people
number one hate me just because of what I look
like and the fact that we already.
Speaker 5 (30:48):
Welcome, welcome, welcome to the party.
Speaker 3 (30:52):
And that we are an interracial couple again.
Speaker 4 (30:55):
Part of why I even wanted to pitch the idea
of YouTube and how being a platform together was because
I was like, I don't see us anywhere, you know,
I see like Wanda Sykes and her wife. Really like
everyone else that I see that might look like us
is it's like Bet and Tina, like we need like
real representation, you know, we need a real couple. And
(31:17):
so I get a lot of I'm Raven's handler, I
whitewash her, I'm a gold digger, I'm controlsing. I don't
let Raven do anything by herself. You know, I talk
too much, I overtalk, I interrupt. I mean, the shit
that I see and hear is is overwhelming, and it's
(31:43):
kind of a shame because the truth of what's happening
is we're a couple that's trying to like grow, thrive,
create content that people may resonate with, might be entertained by.
I'm also trying to, yeah, of course, step into my
own strengths, find my voice more clearly in my work field.
(32:05):
You know, there are personal goals and growth that I'm
also trying to achieve that everyone is entitled to. So
I've tried to honestly, let all of it go Ashland
because the noise shouldn't impact me one way or another,
whether it's positive or negative. It's that's a new thought process.
Let me let me jump in here. Yeah, that's because
(32:26):
when it did start, there was a little bit of
a thing between us because she was like, why aren't.
Speaker 3 (32:31):
You Why aren't you saying this? And the why aren't
you saying this?
Speaker 2 (32:34):
In the comments?
Speaker 3 (32:34):
Why aren't you saying this? And I'm like, I've.
Speaker 5 (32:36):
Been through so much shit when it comes to the
comments and being hated from back in the day that
I know the best thing to do is to turn
to delete the app and keep going. And when she
started getting death threats, oh that was different.
Speaker 3 (32:54):
That was different.
Speaker 5 (32:54):
When she started getting death threats, I was like, you
can literally not do anything.
Speaker 3 (32:58):
Can I just tell you why I was getting death threats?
The whole thing started because.
Speaker 4 (33:03):
I was asked on Kiki Palmer's podcast by Kiki if
I'd ever watched if I watched that So Raven growing
up as a kid, and I said no, I didn't.
Actually I've seen all of it since.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
We've been together. I love it. I think the show
is fantastic. But I didn't watch it growing up.
Speaker 4 (33:19):
And.
Speaker 5 (33:21):
The internet world went crazy, and so I'm used to
dissociating and putting it away because you're not who I
speak to at Starbucks, and if you are, I dare
you to say something to my face. So there was
a moment where I had to speak up. But you know,
being from the generation that a comment is the end
(33:42):
all be all, or if somebody comments or doesn't like
a picture, you're not popular.
Speaker 6 (33:47):
The world is ending. I'm not from that generation.
Speaker 5 (33:49):
I don't care. I love it, Thanks for thanks so much.
But what matters is if these suits on the twenty
first floor hire me and I do my job, That's
what matters. And so now, oh, my wife is really
starting to understand that. And I remember saying to her,
I'm like, did that prevent you from having these five
pitch meetings and selling a show?
Speaker 3 (34:09):
Did that comment.
Speaker 5 (34:10):
Change anything in your life other than your mental state
because you read it and you think that someone's going happy.
Speaker 3 (34:15):
Did the Amazon packages stop being delivered?
Speaker 2 (34:18):
Oh, I'm obsessed?
Speaker 3 (34:20):
Did it stop? I was like, no, that's true, it off.
Speaker 2 (34:25):
Is it fucking with your money? Here to be a period?
Speaker 1 (34:28):
But I turned my comments. I am what you need
to know about me. Besides, I'm head to toe tattoos
and I look a certain way. I am a gentle, soft,
squishy teddy bear. I had to turn my fucking comments off.
I'll never open those things back up.
Speaker 3 (34:44):
Nope, you can't do it.
Speaker 5 (34:46):
It's another It's another part of the game that we
don't have to play that gives them a chance to interact.
And if you allow them, if you allow those comments
to interact with you, you're.
Speaker 3 (34:57):
Not being your best self. You know.
Speaker 5 (35:00):
That's another form of bullying. But those people get excitement
from it. So I'm all I'm from the mindset, and
I told her. I was like, the more haters you have,
the more.
Speaker 6 (35:08):
Clout you have.
Speaker 3 (35:08):
Let the hate. I don't care, but it's about it's
about how you interact with that hate that matters.
Speaker 4 (35:14):
One of the craziest things, though, when it comes to
headlines or videos that I ever saw, and I showed
this to Raven, somebody made like a news report, oh
my god video that was like on TikTok about us
having a public fight in a in a restaurant and
the quote was Raven simone storms out of restaurant and yells,
(35:38):
yells to wife. Stop talking to me that way. I'm
not your slave, and that like in the in the thing,
it's like AI generated. It's like Randa was yelling at
Raven Raven through glass of water, like this whole explanation
of this fight that we had had at a restaurant
we've never been to in our lives, like it was.
Speaker 5 (35:58):
That was good, but again the AI generated content because
hate brings eye.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Clicks, clicks clicks.
Speaker 1 (36:07):
No one's out here being like, oh, the greatest love
story of all time, only only J did that. That's
so sorry, bless bless you.
Speaker 5 (36:21):
Really that was a you guys.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
Gave it to me.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
I really tease you up for that.
Speaker 3 (36:30):
That was really funny.
Speaker 1 (36:36):
This is wide open and I'm your host, Ashlyn Harris.
Thanks for listening.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
We'll be right back. I will say this, Raven.
Speaker 1 (36:48):
I saw a birthday message that you recently put up,
and you were like, I want you to live forever,
like a million years, like you were being so sweet
and so and.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
It's interesting because.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
Sophia and I say this all the time, I want
you to live forever, and I'm curious. I want you
to elaborate a little more on it, because I do
think it has taken so much for all of us
to get to where we are right now, and the
way we move in the world, and how we show
up for ourselves and our partners and the safety and
(37:25):
like the love that we feel in these sacred spaces.
I can only say, like, I'm so at peace. Time
is one thing money can't buy, and it's so unpredicted,
and I want to live in this happiness, in this
peace forever and ever and ever, because I'm finally getting
(37:48):
what I saw on movies that I always was like,
Oh that shit doesn't exist in real life, and I'm
like living it and I can't selfishly. I just want more.
I want more. I want more. I want more. And
I'm wondering if you said that because you resonate like
you resonate with it and you feel that finally getting
(38:08):
that type of love you've always wanted, Like do we
share that together? Or am I getting like emotionally deep
and like, nah.
Speaker 3 (38:16):
Girl, Ashlynn, you said it perfectly.
Speaker 5 (38:20):
However, the reason I did that was because my wife
really likes Instagram posts for her for something else and
I'm just playing, but I.
Speaker 3 (38:26):
Was like a little bit of a dick. That's my
that's my shicks.
Speaker 1 (38:31):
That shows that's that shows a healthy sign of a relationship.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
Let me tell you.
Speaker 5 (38:35):
Look, because honey, I said it for a different I
said it for a couple of reasons. I'm gonna tell
the truth, and I'm gonna tell the deeper, subconscious one.
Speaker 3 (38:43):
The truth is my wife has health.
Speaker 5 (38:45):
Anxiety, and I really want to make sure she knows
that she is not leaving this planet before me. She
always says I have to leave for I'm like, that's
not happening. You're I'm staying longer than you, and you're healthy.
I'm super healthy. I know you are so much better.
I know, but I haven't, but I did the last
time I posted.
Speaker 3 (39:03):
That's what was from my birthday in August.
Speaker 5 (39:06):
Yes, you just got the plates instructor a great way.
She's a Plotti's genius or whatever. And then the other
side of it is I agree with everything that you
just said, Ashlynn. I actually had this comment. I'm doing
a documentary about my I'm not doing it. Robin Roberts
is doing a documentary about my life. And I had
the conversation just yesterday about how just really just regurgitating
(39:32):
what you said, but growing up in Atlanta and working
for as long as I have in the industry, only
having Ellen DeGeneres and barely Paula Poundstone and secretly Whitney Houston.
There were no and Chaz Bono that was a plus,
but there were no signs that the life that I'm
(39:55):
living right now is actually possible. What I thought was
going to happen was that I was going to marry
a man, and I was gonna buy two houses, one
that he lives in and then one that my woman
lives in, and I was just gonna go between the
two houses if somebody needed to take a picture, I'd
be with him. But then he knew that he can
do whatever you wanted to. And I was gonna like
that's I planned that shit out. I had properties. It
(40:17):
was just I was gonna be And yesterday when I
was talking to one of the producers at the Dock,
I was saying that I'm literally in a dream state
to where if this like it's kind of unhealthy because
it hasn't saturated in my skin yet.
Speaker 3 (40:33):
It's still it still feels like some.
Speaker 5 (40:35):
Days I have to wake up be like, yo, I
got married period period to a woman.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
That's crazy.
Speaker 6 (40:41):
That's crazy.
Speaker 5 (40:42):
And I'm out here talking about it and people like,
see me for it. It's some days it doesn't click in,
it doesn't sink in. Some days I'm in it fully
and I'm like, yeah, let's look at this beautiful moment.
And then some days I'm like, uh, do people know?
But that's my own personal mental sickness. But it's true.
It's like I do want her. I want her to
(41:03):
thrive past life, you know what I mean? Like, I
want her soul to be so happy this go round
that when she's in her next soul, she doesn't think
that she was tortured in a in a castle, and
then she can she can. That's another conversation, that she
can live so peacefully now because I know my wife's
history and I want her to be happy. So yeah,
(41:24):
And a lot of the times I write those messages
and I'm like, what are the things that I don't
say out loud enough? Because I was raised by guys,
so my verbal love and communication is a little different.
Speaker 1 (41:37):
No, I feel that I get the I get the comment.
Often when I'm getting too serious or too specific and
too direct, it's sweetheart, we're not in the locker room.
Please do not talk to me like I'm your teammate,
I'm a different kind of teammate. Yeah, and I have
to like, I got it, I'm in I'm a dial.
Speaker 4 (41:58):
Yeah, And that's a good reminder. And I think that
that's also a good way to maybe communicate, Like I
could be a better communicator in those moments instead of
just saying, don't talk to me that way, or I
don't like that to be like I'm not a kid
on a set that you're directing right now, you know
what I mean, Like I don't remember who I am. Yeah,
(42:21):
and that that'll click in and I'll say it to
you too.
Speaker 3 (42:25):
This has been such good therapy.
Speaker 2 (42:27):
Well, I think you're welcome, man, I'm for free. Yeah,
imagine that it's accessible here.
Speaker 3 (42:32):
Truly. We're gonna have to do this weekly, I guess.
Speaker 2 (42:35):
So what's next for you both? I mean you you
you're just you're.
Speaker 1 (42:39):
The best, and you're both highly successful and super creative.
And I know you're starting Did you start already the
production company?
Speaker 3 (42:48):
Yes, you started it. Yes, we started it.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
We are Curs Pictures.
Speaker 3 (42:53):
Yeah, look at.
Speaker 1 (42:54):
Me go I know, okay, research, Yeah, I don't miss any.
Speaker 5 (43:02):
We are currently in the process of pitching creating and
aligning with a lot of different podcasts and constantly just
moving forward.
Speaker 3 (43:12):
But the baby that is now a.
Speaker 5 (43:16):
Toddler, I think we should we can say now that
we feed most Formula two is the podcast.
Speaker 4 (43:22):
Okay, yeah, Time slow performance. I don't know, maybe we're
on solids now, Tea. Time is really my baby. This
is true, and I really put a lot of attention
and energy into it.
Speaker 3 (43:37):
But also, I mean, we have some great projects in
our production company, Raven. You have so much going on, babes.
I know, I have so much going on.
Speaker 5 (43:43):
I'm writing a book, I'm writing my memoir, the doc
that I talked about a little bit earlier.
Speaker 3 (43:48):
Yes, a few things.
Speaker 5 (43:50):
And you know, for those in the industry who know
when you create something and try to sell it, that's
such a slow process.
Speaker 2 (43:56):
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 5 (43:57):
Yes, So that's why there hasn't really been a big
it because we also want to make sure that we
come out with the right project and we align with
the right people and the industry right now in.
Speaker 3 (44:06):
The buying field is so good.
Speaker 6 (44:08):
Old boys, Buddy, Buddy and.
Speaker 3 (44:10):
You and Sophia, we're just on to set together.
Speaker 5 (44:12):
Oh yeah, I'm shadowing Debbiel I was shadowing debbiel And and
multiple directors over at Grace Super sweet.
Speaker 2 (44:19):
Such a good group too. God, there's just great people
over there.
Speaker 3 (44:23):
They work like a machine.
Speaker 5 (44:24):
I really want to try my my handed directing for
you like that. But I'm doing a movie and producing
a movie. I'm in some and yeah, we're constantly Listen,
we gotta work a mean listen.
Speaker 1 (44:38):
I feel that in my bones. I mean it's like
around the clock all the time.
Speaker 4 (44:42):
Now.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
What do you do though, when it's just like when
it's just you two, Like what fills your cup up
these days, especially with like how heavy things are and
how how much you both work and how public you are, Like, what,
what's just for the both of you?
Speaker 3 (44:56):
Massages? We love going, oh massages.
Speaker 4 (45:00):
Yes, I honestly just love a slow day with you.
Like this past weekend, we had a few errands to
run with that we were driving by. We passed a
little farmer's market and we just spontaneously stopped and popped in,
and then we ran the rest of our little errands
and we just hung out at home and the rest
of the day made some food, talked, watched TV. I
(45:24):
think we got massages like those days where there's just
kind of nothing but us and we can just hang
and talk and reconnect our my faves.
Speaker 3 (45:35):
Raven is a painter and I love it.
Speaker 4 (45:37):
Oh yeah, she's amazing and she'll sometimes sneak away into
the back house and paint and I love just like
going back there with her and either watching her work
or doing a little something myself.
Speaker 2 (45:51):
We will binge a show, though, we like, no matter what.
Speaker 6 (45:56):
At eight o'clock, not.
Speaker 5 (45:57):
All phones, but most phones are gone and we are
consuming content YouTube HBO.
Speaker 3 (46:05):
Who like we.
Speaker 2 (46:07):
It's the latest? What's the latest? We're in two?
Speaker 4 (46:10):
Okay, so we finished the Diplomat. We finished Tasks last
night just for the hell of it. We watched Don't
Say a Word, Call Douglas and Brittany Murphy. That's such
a good movie from two thousand and what it was
thousand and two, which is crazy fantastic.
Speaker 3 (46:25):
We're on Searching Sister Wife.
Speaker 5 (46:27):
Oh, I finished Pull Dark, but oh we haven't finished Wayward,
but now we're almost done with that.
Speaker 1 (46:33):
Yeah, ooh, so you jump around, you don't stay consistent.
Speaker 5 (46:38):
Oh no, we we don't like. I'll binge a show
like I'll wake up at four o'clock in the morning.
And watch the stuff that she doesn't like.
Speaker 4 (46:46):
We watched like, so this is a mixture of reality,
this is a mixture of obviously scripted. Then we'll go
back in the catalog just for fun. But we both,
like I said earlier, in this conversation, we can talk
about the entertainment industry and movie film and I think
that that's very much me living out my relationship with
my dad because my father was in the industry, and
(47:09):
the majority of my conversation the only thing that I
can connect with him on was.
Speaker 3 (47:14):
TV movies and the industry.
Speaker 4 (47:17):
So when we get into that loop together, it's great
because we're like picking things apart. Why did they do that? Oh,
it's so well written. How did they shoot that? Oh
my gosh, well rewind rewatch figure it out the delivery.
It's very rare too that we watch something that we
get so sucked into that we're not analyzing it and
breaking it down.
Speaker 1 (47:35):
So what I want to do, by the way, is
just end with a few let's end on a light note.
So I'm going to ask just a few fire like
rapid fire things. You can be truthful, you can be light.
You can say get the fuck out of he or
I'm not answering that you're wild, but yeah, and then
we'll end the show on a light note, as we've
(47:57):
been dropping, you know, dimes on couple's therapy.
Speaker 2 (48:03):
Done all right? Who made the first move?
Speaker 3 (48:07):
You opened a fucking whole bag of wine. I know
this is a We fight about this all the time.
We can't agree, but don't don't. It was me?
Speaker 1 (48:18):
Okay, who's the Who's the one that usually starts the fight?
Speaker 2 (48:23):
The argument.
Speaker 3 (48:25):
Again? Another can of worms?
Speaker 5 (48:26):
Because because here's why before she answers, because it's about tone,
and it's about that one little word that switches that
the person who actually starts the fight doesn't know they
started it, because then you trigger. So I'm a reactor
and she is also a reactor.
Speaker 1 (48:44):
It's fifty all right, deal, favorite time to get freaky?
Speaker 2 (48:49):
Are you? Sunriser? Nighttime?
Speaker 3 (48:51):
Nighttime?
Speaker 6 (48:52):
Morning Woo?
Speaker 2 (48:53):
Who's the big spoon?
Speaker 5 (48:56):
She wants to be so bad? And I hate it
and I let her get it sometimes, but I like anymore.
Speaker 2 (49:00):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (49:02):
If your sex life was like a title, like a
movie title, what would it be?
Speaker 3 (49:09):
This is so fucked up?
Speaker 2 (49:10):
I love it.
Speaker 3 (49:11):
I love it so ridiculous. I've never don it Okay
a movie title. This is fun. Give us a second.
Speaker 2 (49:18):
Yeah, okay, this is this is.
Speaker 1 (49:20):
So good.
Speaker 2 (49:25):
The writer of the group. Come on, director, listen, the
things in my.
Speaker 3 (49:30):
Head are ridiculous.
Speaker 5 (49:32):
I'm gonna say, do a Nancy Myers movie.
Speaker 3 (49:39):
A Nancy Myers movie. It's complicated, great fatal attraction. Don't
say a word.
Speaker 1 (49:50):
Like perfect lights on her, off, lights on her, off,
lights on or off off.
Speaker 3 (49:57):
I like it. I like it on Beyonce, Oh my.
Speaker 2 (50:00):
God, Sophia does too. She's like, girl, I'm like, turn
these fucking lights off, and she's like, I want to
see you.
Speaker 3 (50:05):
No, and I don't want her to see me. So
I don't know how to make it work. Okay, yeah,
and I like it dark.
Speaker 4 (50:12):
But if we have to have a light then it
needs to be like a warm beauty ringe.
Speaker 2 (50:18):
I'm sexy. We're keeping it sexy.
Speaker 3 (50:20):
Yes, okay.
Speaker 2 (50:22):
Which queer stereotype? Do you absolutely live up.
Speaker 3 (50:25):
To the soft butch I mean the u hauling of
it all? That's true. We totally did that. We created
we reinvented it on a homely level.
Speaker 2 (50:40):
I love it. Do you have a queer celebrity crush?
Speaker 3 (50:44):
Hmmm? No, I have a straight celebrity.
Speaker 2 (50:47):
Oh okay, look that's.
Speaker 3 (50:49):
A stereotype of Lizzie.
Speaker 2 (50:51):
Yeah, there we go.
Speaker 3 (50:52):
Always loves a straight girl. Yeah, I mean we do.
Speaker 2 (50:55):
Tell me, tell me who, tell me who? Come on,
drop those those bombs.
Speaker 5 (50:59):
Okay, So I can't remember her name, but the younger
sister from the show Vita, which is a great show,
also a queer show.
Speaker 6 (51:11):
I think she's canceled though.
Speaker 3 (51:16):
She's gonna be distant. Just tell her, doesn't think, tell
her the true one. She doesn't.
Speaker 5 (51:20):
She doesn't have a queer crush on a queer person
on a guy.
Speaker 3 (51:25):
Oh well, it's consistent. I think.
Speaker 4 (51:31):
I just think that Charlie Hundham is like just beautiful.
We saw him in an airport. He made my knee
like bend at you.
Speaker 2 (51:38):
Yeah, you were like you get what you got those
wonky ass knees.
Speaker 3 (51:41):
Yeah he knows, he knows.
Speaker 4 (51:44):
He looked at me and he winked like he literally
fucking knows the power that he wields.
Speaker 3 (51:48):
And I was just like her guy.
Speaker 4 (51:53):
But I mean, there's definitely I see the one that
I really want to say that we existed for a
long time. She's so insane right now, I'm kind of
like I.
Speaker 3 (52:03):
Just said one that was canceled. Have to match the
I could do. I could totally do it as like
bet Porter. That was my I was obsessed with that Porter. Give.
Speaker 4 (52:18):
We just saw her recently in an event. She still
looks at Revels and she looks like that Porter.
Speaker 2 (52:23):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (52:24):
If you were trapped on a desert island and you
can only bring one queer essential.
Speaker 2 (52:29):
What would it be?
Speaker 3 (52:31):
One queer essential?
Speaker 1 (52:33):
We're talking glitter Lube Indigo Girls soundtrack, like, I don't
know you you picked hilarious.
Speaker 3 (52:41):
I'm gonna be really honest. I'm bringing sun block. I
don't know if that's queer or straight. That's that's straight, that's.
Speaker 2 (52:47):
Very that's some straight ship that I love.
Speaker 3 (52:50):
Guys, I have to bring it, okay.
Speaker 2 (52:52):
I would be like chapstick, you know I need.
Speaker 3 (52:55):
Yeah, that's weird. I would bring chapstick too. I'm bringing
my pocket, my pocket pleasure.
Speaker 5 (53:02):
Hey baybe Gray, No, no, no, no, not that one.
Speaker 2 (53:07):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (53:08):
Well, listen, you both are a dream. Thank you for
coming on you, thank.
Speaker 3 (53:13):
You for having us, and we hope you come on ours.
Speaker 2 (53:15):
I would love that. I would love that You're never
getting rid of me. This is the way it works.
We're fast friends. We friends. You haul too, So I'll
be in LA in two weeks and I'll be hello,
she's home.
Speaker 3 (53:30):
The top picture here. I hope that you're serious. Hold on,
I opened it.
Speaker 1 (53:38):
I really opened the door there, Up, I.
Speaker 3 (53:42):
Really, I really hope.
Speaker 4 (53:44):
I am curious because we need lesbian friend lesbian fri death.
Speaker 2 (53:50):
Listen, I am listen, I am in Well. It's so
good to see you both.
Speaker 1 (53:55):
Thank you so much for coming on Wide Open, and
thank you for so real and honest and continuing to
show up and move the needle in our community. It's
really beautiful to watch and to see, so thank you both.
And yeah, everyone, thanks for tuning into Wide Open.
Speaker 2 (54:14):
Thank you Raven and Miranda.
Speaker 1 (54:16):
Thank you for showing us that love can be playful, grounded,
and deeply spiritual all at once. The kind of love
that feels earned, the kind that comes when you've done
the work and you actually know yourself. What you've built
together is proof that timing is everything. That sometimes we
don't find love we deserve until we finally are ready
(54:38):
to receive it. You've reminded me and everyone listening that
the most beautiful thing about love isn't in the perfection.
It's in the choosing, choosing each other, choosing joy, choosing forever,
even when forever isn't promised. I love you both dearly
and thank you for coming on Wide Open. We'll see
you next week. Wide Open with Ashland Harris is an
(55:07):
iHeart women's sports production. You can find us on the
iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Our producers are Carmen Borca Correo, Emily Maronoff, and Lucy Jones.
Production assistants from Malia Aguidello. Our executive producers are Jesse Katz,
(55:28):
Jenny Kaplan, and Emily Rudder. Our editors are Jenny Kaplan
and Emily Rudder and I'm your host Ashlin Harris
Host
Ashlyn Harris
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Are You A Charlotte?
In 1997, actress Kristin Davis’ life was forever changed when she took on the role of Charlotte York in Sex and the City. As we watched Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte navigate relationships in NYC, the show helped push once unacceptable conversation topics out of the shadows and altered the narrative around women and sex. We all saw ourselves in them as they searched for fulfillment in life, sex and friendships. Now, Kristin Davis wants to connect with you, the fans, and share untold stories and all the behind the scenes. Together, with Kristin and special guests, what will begin with Sex and the City will evolve into talks about themes that are still so relevant today. "Are you a Charlotte?" is much more than just rewatching this beloved show, it brings the past and the present together as we talk with heart, humor and of course some optimism.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.