April 30, 2026 • 56 mins
Chrystal Renee welcomes KevOnStage to talk about how humor helps him tell the truth and cope in real life, especially through his one-man show “Grief Sucks,” inspired by losing his brother. He explains that comedy can help people hear hard things, “People can listen, are more open to listening if you’ve made them laugh”—and admits jokes are part of how he processes grief, even when it’s messy and too soon. Kev also gets real about boundaries and burnout (why he stopped meet-and-greets), parenting two very different sons, and what he’s learned in 22 years of marriage—like how you can “do hurt and harm with good intention,” and how marriage requires staying updated, “like being up to date on your cell phone.” Biggest takeaway: growth is ongoing, and Kev is choosing to be “unapologetically me,” even if everyone won’t like it.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Calling all my sweeties to the forefront.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
I'm your host, christ and this is to keep it positive, Sweetie.
Show welcome to keep it positive, sweetye the place where
we he'll grow and learn together.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Today's guest is a comedian.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
Creator and storyteller who has built his voice on truth,
using humor to reflect real life in a way that
resonates deeply with so many. I am so glad to
be sitting with keV on stage. keV on Stage is
known for his ability to take everyday moments, relationships, family, faith,
and culture and turn them into something both humorous and honest.
(00:39):
But beyond the laughter, he's also creating space for deeper conversations.
From his serious safe Space to his hit one man
show Grief Sucks, he's exploring what it looks like to
navigate love, lost, growth in real time without pretending that
you have to have it all figured out. Sweetie, please
give a very warm welcome to my keV on stay.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
Praise the Lord, sweeties, Praise the Lord. We're here in
the room. We've been trying to make this happen for
a long time we have, and you're finally here, finally
here here.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
I'm so excited.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Great thank you for having me. No, thank you, of course,
I know.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
I mean you're not. You don't live in Atlanta, so
thank you for.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
Having in Atlanta. But when I come, I'll be like, man,
I should live here. I'm telling you it is so black. Yes,
everything black, Everything that's good about being black is here.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
It is really creative.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Is the culture of the community regular black. It ain't
just just black people, Southern charm. Traffic I could do without.
You know, go out to mcdonna though. Traffic should not
go out to make and didn't used to go out
to McDonough.
Speaker 4 (01:44):
But they go out mcdonna though. As far so, that's
the lucky I've been telling people. It's worse than LA here.
You think, so I do LA in the heart of
the city. It makes sense. Atlanta's traffic is further in
the hardest. It's like everywhere, and then the little back
roads ain't back road. Everybody knows that, lady, so are
(02:05):
we Yep, I've been using this for you.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Ain't no tricks, ain't no treat.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
You are right, Yes, you're absolutely right. That's I didn't
think that. I feel like since twenty twenty.
Speaker 4 (02:14):
It's gotten when i've been I come to Atlanta two
or three five times a year over the last six
seven years.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
It's crazy. And I live in l A. I know,
bad trapping. Yeah, Atlanta's worse.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Dang Atlanta, get it together.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
Everybody moving here to chase they.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Drink, listen and say that money that money on Mary Camp,
thank you so much for coming today.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
I remember we first officially.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
I've been a fan of yours before we actually met,
but we met on the shops HBCU tour and TSU Yes,
And at that moment, I was like, man, he is
who he is, because you know, sometimes.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
You meet people you've been a fan, but then can
beat me like he died, he said he is.
Speaker 4 (02:55):
I really appreciate that compliment. I've been getting that compliment
a lot. And I work very hard to be who
I am all the time.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
And that doesn't mean I'm perfect like.
Speaker 4 (03:07):
I but I but I genuinely try to be consistent,
you know what I mean. I don't have this like
because now you know, we live in a world of authenticity.
You if you aren't who you are, they will people
will find out anyway. So it's not like we ain't
wrestlers in the eighties and like there's too many stories,
too many people we act with that we don't know
(03:27):
who knows them, especially you. And now you be on set,
somebody gonna be on that set that knows somebody else,
that knows.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
You so exactly. So I don't.
Speaker 4 (03:35):
I don't.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
I don't do that.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
I try not to do that.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
That is, I don't do meet and greets. I don't
do meet greets for years.
Speaker 4 (03:47):
But I'm gonna tell you why I stop. I'm gonna
tell you exactly why I realized. I always love the people,
but I can't keep up the the energy to make
their experience good.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
If I've just done a show hard, it's hard.
Speaker 4 (04:05):
I tell people I've been doing this joke on stage,
Like imagine you just worked your full shift and then
you ready to go home, rub your feet together, and
instead of doing that, you gotta shake three hundred hands
and take.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
Three hundred That's the perfect analogy. You'd be like, man
and then doing it before a show.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
I'm like, I don't want to use all my energy
because the people pay to see me.
Speaker 3 (04:24):
You want to give them that, So I can't manage it.
So I can only do meet if it's if that's
the event.
Speaker 4 (04:29):
Yeah, because I know, okay, for two hours, three hours,
I can give you anything. Yeah, and after a show.
But I just say that because I don't. I'm not
perfect here thinking about my job that I don't like.
But that's really more because I don't want to disappoint
people that I don't like people.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
I love people. I wouldn't be where I am, wouldn't.
Speaker 4 (04:45):
Be sitting here without the people, for sure, but I
don't want them to be like man, he was kind
of like he was tired, because I'm I am tired,
and I likely flew overnight to do this, Like here,
I took a red out last night.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
Did you sweep it on plane? Ain't real?
Speaker 1 (05:03):
It's not real.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
It ain't real. I ain't got no private with everybody else,
so that ain't no bad. It is not. So I
just wanted to I'm not perfect, y'all. Don't don't. Don't
do that to me.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Nobody is perfect.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
But you know what, I think comedians are in people's
eyes somewhat don't have a They think you don't have
a bad day, or they think that things is like
they want you to be on all the time. What
kind of pressure does that put on you when you
feel like man like I'm really tired or I'm just
having a day.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
But they won't make me laugh.
Speaker 4 (05:35):
I don't respond well to make me laugh or tell
me a joke. I am not a clown. You don't
see no red. No, you come to see me work.
Speaker 3 (05:44):
I give you my show. But people are often surprised.
They'll be like, Liz, I bet you has you cracking
up at home all the time?
Speaker 4 (05:51):
No, not really, because at home I don't be like
Lizen tell me about the time. So it's like I
got to take the trash out watching Love Overboard, like
I got to perform for her. But my wife, yeah
and she you know my kids, I ain't funny to
them no more anyway, you know.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
Tony Beaker or Tony Beker, Patrick Cloud.
Speaker 4 (06:14):
But like I imagine, you know, like I take the
approach that once I leave my house, I am on. Yes,
So if I try to have good energy with anybody
at me, but at home.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
I'd be at the house.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
It's a recharge.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
I recharged.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
I enjoyed my home, I enjoyed my family. I enjoy
just chilling watching YouTube. I'm not like trying jokes out
on my family. I mean, I'm funny, but I'm not
like performative fun exactly that.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
I love that.
Speaker 3 (06:41):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
When did you realize that you were funny?
Speaker 3 (06:45):
Very early?
Speaker 4 (06:46):
I remember very early and I, and not only did
I was funny. I realized there was a benefit to
being funny.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
And it was very simple. After church, I must have
been like five.
Speaker 4 (06:54):
Or six years old, I would mimic what happened in
church that day, and my grandma home was very stoneface.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
In church was not like that. At home, my grandma.
Speaker 4 (07:03):
Would be like, do sister Daniel shallcap or whatever Washington do?
And I realized when she let me do that, I
would like my bed at eight o'clock, it's eight fifteen, Like, if.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
You do that thing, you can stay up.
Speaker 4 (07:16):
So I immediately knew I could do something that made
people laugh and there was a value to it. Yes,
So I was like, oh, yeah, attention this, I can
do this.
Speaker 3 (07:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
So, and it's so interesting that I was just telling
somebody this. I realized what I do now is a
version of what I did as a kid.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Literally literally.
Speaker 4 (07:33):
I remember we used to have like talent shows and
we would do you know, people sing or whatever.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
I mean.
Speaker 4 (07:39):
My brother would do like sketches in church, and we
would mix like we did a David and Alive sketch
and I was Goliath and he was David.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
You though, my older brother and.
Speaker 4 (07:48):
I did like we were like we should do mc
hammer can't touch this, and then you sling shot me.
So I was like mixing hip hop and R and
B into church even at like seven, like I was
always aware of what was and he in the world
and always current and Hammer was like it might have
been ninety two, so I must have been nine whatever.
Hammer was at his like apex. Yes, So I realized
(08:10):
it's that's what I do now on the Internet and
my shows or whatever. It's like a version of that.
And I've just been thinking about how much God puts
in people very young, like I just did, uh, do
you know Luke.
Speaker 3 (08:22):
Luke Tilmeny's little kid. He was on Jenifferunson Show.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Yes, yeah, yeah, exactly, show all the fun that he.
Speaker 3 (08:28):
Does he does preaching it out. Yes, So we did.
Speaker 4 (08:33):
American Idol invited us last night and he was like
the co host, Crystal, there's a we in a set
with you. You've been on movies like three four hundred,
five hundred people. We're live on American idol. He preaching
on Q, praying on Q, singing on Q. He's like
seven eight years old. And I told my wife, I said, oh,
God put that in him early. And thankfully for him,
(08:55):
his family is nurturing the gift because I think a
lot of times our gift is there, but it's not
always nurtured by our family. And sometimes it's not because
they don't see it. Yeah, sometimes they just can't. Yes,
you know what I mean. But what a gift to
have a family and a way to nurture your gift
from seven eight years old.
Speaker 3 (09:14):
This is a little kid on Instagram. He's like nine.
Speaker 4 (09:16):
He's a fashion designer and his family has spent bread. Wow,
and he's cutting dresses and style and stuff, and it's like,
your gift is there. Yeah, he's a prodigy, but like
how many, especially Black people, we often aren't able to
express that at a young age because we don't have
access to the same resources freedom, even like auditions.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
You kid in Hollywood, your parents.
Speaker 4 (09:38):
I couldn't take Isay and them the audition everything by Yeah,
he's got to get some of these because I can
keep going up down to one on one. You ain't
booking gas is gas. I gotta leave work go to school.
Hey man, it's just regular now, you just kid kids
school ABC one two three. Because I can't do brother,
I can't be taken off work for you to you
(10:00):
maybe not gonna get it right.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
And I love you.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Yeah, yea.
Speaker 4 (10:10):
So so I just I think my family didn't push
my gift down.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
That's amazing.
Speaker 4 (10:15):
And I had a place to express it, which, you know, interestingly,
interestingly enough was the Black Church. Yeah, and my church
was allowed us to be more than singers.
Speaker 3 (10:23):
And musicians exactly. I was able to do acting and
other stuff in addition to singing.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
So that was Turkey before Churchy.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
That was Churchy before Churchy. That's why Churchy was so
easy for me to create because that was.
Speaker 4 (10:36):
Like, that's shape that we hadn't done an episode that
wasn't directly from my life in somewhere. Those characters are
mother Jeene is based on my grandma, and my grandma's
name is Ruthie Gene.
Speaker 3 (10:50):
So like these people are just yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
And we resonate. I feel like I was just talking
to somebody. It's like it doesn't matter where you're from.
There are certain parts of the black culture that everybody
gets and church is one of.
Speaker 3 (11:04):
Us that you understand. You have to be there, you.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Know, yes, totally said.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
He talked about as a parent nurturing the gifts. You're
a father of two sons, how are you nurturing their gifts?
Speaker 3 (11:20):
Now? You know? I think it's so interesting.
Speaker 4 (11:24):
I have two kids who are so different you wouldn't
think they're related. So my oldest is they're both creative,
but they're in creative very different ways. My oldest is
behind the camera. He used to do stop motion videos.
He'll spend hours animating like on his iPad, creates storylines
on ww like. He's always creative writing. He acts too,
(11:48):
but his interest is always behind the camera, creating story
My youngest has zero those interests. But when you put
in front of microphone or camera, he just has something.
He has some spark. I mean when they were very
young and they were an awesome this TV and we
were getting paid five hundred dollars per sketch for me
to write, direct, edit, produce and share the bread with them, Wow,
(12:08):
my youngest would not be wanting to do it. My
oldest had the work ethic. He's just like yo, I'm
gonna be on time. I'm gonna do my job, whether
once or not. My youngest was like David Ruffin, like
I don't do I ain't doing this today, and now
I don't feel like it. And I remember telling the
people to it's like, hey, brother, I'm not finna deal
with with him. I ain't finna do this, and they
were like, you are because when the camera gets on him,
(12:31):
he just has something, I think, and he's super competitive
in that way. They're both athletic. But my youngest is
very competitive. My oldest isn't. So for my oldest, it's
like animation, subscriptions, here's my camera, you can do stop motion,
here's how you do that, here's how you edit. My
youngest is like, we'll do a podcast. We used to
(12:52):
do a podcast together. He was like, let's do one
episode and I was like, let's do six to eight
little season going and go ass.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
He was like, let's just do one. But we shoot
videos together sometimes.
Speaker 4 (13:02):
But I also don't put too much pressure on them
at this age because I still want them to do
it because they really love it. It's not like a desire.
I don't have to desire to like exploit them. I
wish I did. I wish I had like that. You know,
Matthew knows Joe Jackson, you know King Richard things now
we need that. We need them daddists and them mamas.
(13:26):
Are you getting the great if you watch the Olympics?
Them kids be like I low key hated by parents
because they made me do stuff I didn't want to
do because they saw greatness.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
We're too nice of the kid.
Speaker 4 (13:36):
Joe Jackson said, I got to y'all got to work.
Michael and them was at work at an adult club
at seven. You know, I'm like, oh, my son, I
love you mental health, mental health. He ain't gonna be
Michael Jackson because I didn't push him and any so
you know that whooping is bad, but also Michael Jackson's bad.
Speaker 3 (13:55):
The album Hello, it all works together.
Speaker 4 (13:59):
We ain't seen no level start with the loving gentle
pant all. I'm saying, I at love nobody into greatness yet. Listen,
we we've done cool, but we ain't love nobody healthily
into greatness because you've got to be a little crazy
to reach them levels. You know, you got to hate.
They hated Joe Jackson my life because I hate you.
Speaker 3 (14:21):
Love ain't enough. I got to hate you to get
where I want to go.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
Literally, that is so crazy because we talk about the
work ethic that we have from our generation to now,
we're like gods. They just like quit stuff and they're
just like fly by night. You like, you gotta stick
to something, you know, you gotta have some discipline, sure,
and they don't have it.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
You know.
Speaker 4 (14:42):
It's funny every generation says that about the next generation.
They said that about us, and I'm like, y'all, that's
not me.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
No, it's not my group. Yeah, but it ain't it
ain't it. I'm at work, think about everybody, everybody working.
Everybody ain't working as hard as you know, even if
if you're millennials, ain't.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
Working as hard as sister.
Speaker 3 (14:59):
See what, some people just turn it in. They ain't
got no studio. You know, you you do it all.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
So I think there's always standouts in for sure, average
people in any generation.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
But I feel like we was Devin for sure.
Speaker 4 (15:15):
We didn't even let me explain. That's the thing that
I don't. I don't mind whooping for wrong. Like growing up,
I got whooped when I was right. And if you
would have just let me explain, you would have seen it.
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Actually wasn't what you thought.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
And then my parents find out later they ain't gonna
undo the whooping, and they ain't gonna say sorry, you
want something to eat?
Speaker 3 (15:34):
No, no, I want you to listen. Okay, you have
to feed me.
Speaker 4 (15:39):
If you would have just gave me three seconds, I
could have told you what happened. But no, no, not,
I got that little game. You wanted an apology.
Speaker 2 (15:50):
I take the game, but I wanted the apology.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
That is hilarious.
Speaker 2 (16:00):
At what point did you realize that humor wasn't just
a way to get through life, but the way you
actually process life?
Speaker 1 (16:07):
Because I feel like you kind of I'll watched.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
You on your Instagram videos and you kind of talk
things through in a humorous way.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
How do you do that?
Speaker 3 (16:15):
I think I realized.
Speaker 4 (16:18):
All the way back to medieval times, the court jester
was allowed to speak truth to power because.
Speaker 3 (16:25):
It was lace with humor.
Speaker 4 (16:27):
Yes, people can listen, are more open to listening if
you've made them laugh. Now, even let you get on
him a little bit if you're making them laugh. So
I think comedy definitely has a place in speaking truth
to power, right, Drew Ski.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
Does a good job of this.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
Yes, Like when he did the megachurch pastors thing. There's
people who were rightfully upset. Yeah, but at the same time,
the argument, you can't argue that he's coming up with
nothing of nowhere.
Speaker 3 (16:59):
We see these videos. I've seen Zipline Pastor, I've seen.
Speaker 4 (17:02):
Door Jacket, So he's able to make that video and
then people are like, well, let's talk about this because
it didn't come out of the thin air. It wouldn't
ring true if it came out of there. Their same
thing with the conservative video that he did. People are upset,
but I remember some of those clips where he did
it almost verbat him. Obviously he's adding humor to it
as well. But you think about George Carlin and Eddie Murphy.
(17:23):
Great comedians have always had the ability to speak true
to power, to speak to something larger and kind of
cover it with honey through jokes. And I think my
new Grief Suck Show is that ability for grief. I think,
you know, I had people die, but I never grieved
the way I grieve when I lost my brother. Yeah,
(17:44):
and I started just making videos. I didn't have a
desire or never thought I could even do stand up
about grief. But every video I made, which I wasn't
even necessarily being funny per se. I was just sharing
what I would. I mean, it was funny, but it's
not like funny haha. It's more like, oh my gosh,
more relatable funny. Yes, but I would see the comments
of like, oh my god, thank you. I thought I
(18:04):
was the only one things like that. And I think
this new show is my way of helping people through
grief and also helping myself through grief as well. And
I think it's to me, it's the best use of
my comedy that I've done. I think it's the I
wouldn't say my comedy's ever helped people process before. I
think I've made you laugh and made you forget about
(18:26):
your problems. That type of stuff, which also has its
place because the world sucks.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
That's the next show.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
Yeah, the grief suns the world sun.
Speaker 4 (18:36):
But you know, we all sit in our driveway after
a long day and we want something to just laugh at.
I definitely can do that. But I think with this show,
I'm able to help you process something that you're going
through or you will go through. Like that's the thing
about grief. If you're blessed to live a long life,
grief is inevitable. You won't live to seventy or eighty
(18:57):
without losing someone or something. Even though grief isn't all death,
like sometimes you grief friendships people who are alive and healthy,
and y'all just go separate ways, Like that's also a
grief the jobs you lost, all kinds of things. So
I think that's what humor is to me right now.
But at the same time, I always be able to
just make people.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
Live in that you create the show. Grief sucks. Like
you said, death is something that we are all.
Speaker 2 (19:25):
Nobody can escape it right right in that moment, How
did you How did you handle that before it turned
into humor?
Speaker 4 (19:33):
The crazy thing it turned into humor instantly. Really, I
just think it's the way I see the world, like
you were saying, it is how I process things.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
It's not the only way.
Speaker 4 (19:44):
Yeah, but jokes come to me the way I imagine
a fish naturally swims. It's like I actually have to
stop myself and be like, I don't know if it
might be too early, right, So I had a lot
of internal things that I'm noticing, not even putting them
in a place. But when I first kid you not
Crystal When I first saw my brother in the coffin
(20:06):
for the first time, my initial thought was this nigga
really in her dad?
Speaker 3 (20:13):
No joke? I said, well, I can't say that, my grandma.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
Right, like this, nigga, are you get up right?
Speaker 4 (20:20):
Get out of these people's stuff which is not funny,
but like it's funny, you know. And I remember when
I was calling the funeral home. I spoke to this
lady for like ten minutes. I said, hey, you know,
because my first time planning a funeral, said hey, you know,
how do you get the body to actually said, my
name is Kevin, my brother passed aways my first time.
(20:42):
How do you get the body from the hospital to
the morgue? And if he wants to get buried somewhere else?
Do you guys handle this? How do you you know
who does an autopsy on the body? Answer all these questions?
And she said, wait, are you the body? I said,
love body, my brother's body.
Speaker 3 (21:01):
Body can be the body if I'm talking to you.
Speaker 4 (21:03):
If I'm the body that I'm talking about right now, Dad,
you should start praying.
Speaker 3 (21:08):
Right because I could what that means for you if
the body is.
Speaker 4 (21:11):
Making its own plans dead and a lot so I
made that video out of frustration and it went crazy.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
People are like, I have struggled with that. I said,
I people in funeral homes to be good at their job.
If you had Chipota you forgetting my cheese, that's fine. Yeah,
if you don't know, you put the person that dead
is alive. The big problem is a big problem.
Speaker 4 (21:31):
So so I think in that way, humor just iss.
It is my It's part of my process, but it's
not the only thing. I definitely cried and anger, frustration,
all the other parts of grief.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
But I think humor is my mechanism for processing anything.
Speaker 4 (21:49):
And I definitely have to like keep it at bay
sometimes to make sure because a lot of comedy is timing.
Speaker 3 (21:55):
Sometimes you're too early. People like, hey, it ain't yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
Yeah, I wasn't exactly for sure. Grandma would have definitely like, X,
give me a minute exactly.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Oh my goodness, sold out shows, so greefus you've had
So how does that feel to know?
Speaker 4 (22:15):
Then it's like, believe it or not. I am genuinely
surprised every single time a show.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
So that's good.
Speaker 4 (22:22):
I am like, because none of this is given right
and you got to stay relevant stay interesting. You can't
control the economy, gas prices, all these things people's.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
And people's choices.
Speaker 4 (22:35):
I can't control the things in your life. So to
convince enough people to spend ten dollars thirty dollars, just
start a ticket. And I'm well aware that it's never
just a ticket. Its ticket parking, babysitter, baby, dinner. Sometimes
you're flying or driving, so it's gas. Like a thirty
dollars ticket can cost you four five hundred.
Speaker 3 (22:54):
Dollars off work. Yeah, yeah, everything I got to I
got to line.
Speaker 1 (23:00):
Yeah, you know. Uh, but.
Speaker 4 (23:06):
It is genuinely surprising every time. For whatever reason, I
always think I'm going to fall off.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
Really, you know, I feel like that may be like
a great place to kind of sit though, so like
it shows you like you're not in control.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
Like so every time it's like, you know what you did?
Speaker 3 (23:20):
That that's a good point.
Speaker 1 (23:22):
I feel like we get too ahead of ourselves.
Speaker 3 (23:24):
Yeah, because it's not a given, you know what, I
can come to.
Speaker 4 (23:27):
Like Atlanta's the city I do well and pretty much
every time, but that sometimes they jumps out early. Sometimes
it's closer to the end, yeah, sometimes, you know. So
it's it's always a fear of mind to and I
don't sell out every show, and I make it pretty
obvious what I'm doing poorly because it's.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
Just part of it.
Speaker 3 (23:50):
Yeah, the game.
Speaker 4 (23:51):
But I am super grateful that people take their heart
earned money and give it to me to make them laugh.
Speaker 3 (23:59):
For an I don't take that for granted.
Speaker 4 (24:02):
It's really a blessing to me and a blessing in
them in the in the sense of like entertainment, but
it's not.
Speaker 3 (24:10):
It's not guaranteed. You know.
Speaker 4 (24:12):
We see artists, musicians, athletes, artists, entertainers canceling tours, canceling
shows because the ticket sales.
Speaker 3 (24:19):
Yeah, that's devastating, it is. You know, it's like, what
did I do?
Speaker 4 (24:23):
I ain't funny no more, and it ain't to be
all marriad reason maybe you ain't funny no more, maybe
you ain't connecting. But yeah, it's also gonna be mad.
I ain't got no job, child support up? Yeahs up everything.
Speaker 3 (24:35):
Flights or flights out Atlanta crazy right now?
Speaker 4 (24:37):
Listen what is happening at down to Hartsville Jackson.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
Flights is out with a straight face, down to twelve hundred.
Speaker 1 (24:46):
Yeah, when for the regular listen.
Speaker 3 (24:50):
Twelve hundred dollars for regular seat.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Thy whole budget for this next business?
Speaker 3 (24:55):
I said, what listen, I have a production coming up
next week.
Speaker 4 (24:59):
I had to cut back the amount of cast that
I could fly because I'm like, I can't. We budgeted
fifty a flight.
Speaker 1 (25:07):
And that's a lot.
Speaker 3 (25:07):
That's a lot that should.
Speaker 4 (25:09):
Be under every city in America for the most part,
if you're out far enough, that should be under budget. Yeah,
Atlanta was like twelve thirteen hundred dollars for main cabin CS.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
Crazy.
Speaker 4 (25:22):
I'm here in Atlanta by myself because I usually read
my team and it's like, at those prices.
Speaker 3 (25:27):
I can't.
Speaker 4 (25:28):
I can't afford to do. I got kids. I'm gonna
have two kids in college.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
You know.
Speaker 3 (25:34):
My son said, Look.
Speaker 4 (25:35):
My son ordered STK on on Uber eats STK. He
said STK. I said, can you order that from me?
I said maybe McDonald's, Mike Chick fil A. Then he
gonna say. I said, okay, man, because I was ordering
it for myself, I said, how do you want your steak?
(25:56):
He said medium rare? I said medium rare? Why he
was like, you know, the time it travels from there
to hear it cooks up to highlight it.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
I said, I've ordered this before.
Speaker 4 (26:11):
Hold up the time it travels.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
How you even thinking?
Speaker 4 (26:18):
And he said, if I want to reheat it and
then it'll be well, I can't have Well that man,
look at God, because I never even thought to do that.
That never even got to pick dinner. Really once for dinner,
that's not even a question. I got to ask Hamburger Helper, right, Annie,
shut up, it's one of the two gonna be in there,
(26:43):
spaghetti from Thursday on Tuesday. And that man said medium
rare because it finishes cooking while it sits.
Speaker 3 (26:50):
Wow, serve, what a mighty guy.
Speaker 1 (26:56):
What do you do? Listen? And that's what you do
it for so your son can order stk on.
Speaker 4 (27:03):
And the funny thing about it is I said that
story because they both go to college and they want
to stay at home, and.
Speaker 1 (27:09):
They're like, it probably feels good.
Speaker 4 (27:12):
You know what, I ain't gonna hold you, Crystal. My
son went on a retreat. My son goes to private
Catholic school and they went on like a little retreat
that was like Christianity based, Like because it's a private
Catholic school, you don't have to go, but it's like
a tradition and he was he was sharing with us
when he came back. You know, we used to go
to like little revivals, team retreats. We used to come
(27:33):
back on fire for God, like I'm sorry God. I
was kissing before, I'm not gonna kiss no more. And
I did a little hunchy, but I ain't gonna hunch
at the last locker and I did touch that girl,
but she said I could because that was locker. Was
a little bit of sin how I was raised. But
after that retreat, that revival of that team revival, I
came back on fire. I spoke in tongues God, I'm
(27:54):
sorry for everything. So it was like the Catholic version
of that would know holy ghost in the sense that
we have. And he gave us the greatest compliment. He
was saying, like, you know, a lot of the kids
were sharing like their parents are abusive, or they are
you know, drunk or not in their life. And he
said when he said he never realized when it was
(28:16):
his turn, he was like, hey, my parents are.
Speaker 3 (28:20):
Nice, they are.
Speaker 4 (28:23):
You know, and he was like he didn't really like
He's like I knew I had good parents, but I
never because all these kids were holding all their stuff
in It was like a real like they were all
breaking down their walls and stuff. We had like a
little ceremony where all the kids talked about it.
Speaker 3 (28:36):
They crying and stuff. It was crazy. And he was like,
I didn't realize.
Speaker 4 (28:39):
How much I appreciated you guys and how easy my
life has been because of what you've done.
Speaker 3 (28:44):
And you're not talking about money.
Speaker 4 (28:46):
He's talking about love, respect, treating him well, not being abusive.
And he's like, I don't you guys haven't even Yeah,
I never even heard you guys yell at each other.
He's heard us argue, and I think there's a difference.
A lot of times parents try not to have any
conflict in front of the kids.
Speaker 3 (29:01):
You got realize how to do everything exactly. You have
to teach them how to even have conflict safely.
Speaker 4 (29:07):
I never cussed that melicitia. You never cussed me. I
never threw no play. I don't talk crazy, nurse, she
don't talk crazy to me. But we have had discussions, yes, amen,
in front of our kids, because that's also modeling that
behavior is. So that was the best compliment I was
telling my son. I checked with him a lot, like
how we doing his parents like, I don't want you
all to go therapy. And my oldest son said to
be like two days ago, He's like, you never noticed
(29:28):
how we always want to be at home. Wow, given
the choice to do other things, like we come home.
We didn't go away to college, even we be international,
like we prefer home. He was like, that's the proof
that you guys are doing a good job.
Speaker 3 (29:41):
So I think that. I was like, will Smith to this,
because that's that's eighteen nineteen years of doing the right thing.
You can't you can't just turn it in.
Speaker 4 (29:58):
Ain't no money gonna fix the like kids with money,
that money does not replace time. Like I had to
go to my son's games. Yes, them soccer games these
last two seasons. Them boys getting blown out on clubs.
We're paying thousand dollars to go. Got y'all get smacked
around in San Diego. Now I got to drive back.
(30:20):
You sleep right and musty, and I got to drive back,
windows down.
Speaker 3 (30:25):
I can still smell you. Are your shoes off. Let's
just stop by this little Marry'll take you a little shout.
Speaker 4 (30:34):
Let's spend the night. And I was asking myself. I
was like, he was like, I was like, have we
went to enough games. He was like, you guys have
been to games my whole life. We're going away games.
They getting smacked around in soccer, volleyball. His teams have
been losing a lot lately, but we being there, Yeah,
clapping it up because money doesn't replace that.
Speaker 3 (30:52):
You can only earn that through time. And we have
spent the time with our.
Speaker 4 (30:57):
Kids to earn their love and respect and all that
type of stuff. I think that might be one of
the things I'm most proud of, is like being a
good father to them. But if I can be honest, Christopher,
they hazel it. Sometimes I was a better father than
a husband, and I was a better father at the
expense of being a good husband without knowing, Yes, because
I didn't have my real dad in my life. Yeah,
(31:19):
so I remember early on like i'n I'm gonna rectify that.
But what that unchecked?
Speaker 3 (31:25):
Unchecked?
Speaker 4 (31:26):
I made my wife miss out on moments, right, Like,
for example, I travel a lot for work. She doesn't
travel that much. So when I travel for where she
stays at home. They might go to the movies, but
they don't do nothing.
Speaker 3 (31:37):
Crazy.
Speaker 4 (31:37):
I remember one time, this must have been like ten
years ago, because I've learned. It took a long time.
I learned eighteen years ago. She went out of town
for something. I immediately took the boys to Vegas father
son trip, Mando lay Bay just had a great weekend.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
And she's like, why would you? We could have did
that on any weekend.
Speaker 4 (31:56):
Yes, And in my head, I'm not. I wasn't on purpose,
like excluding her. I was just doing things that I
thought I wish my dad had did for me. Got
our kids a PlayStation. My son's a PlayStation, terrible calf
with a good heart. We agree to get to a PlayStation.
We go give it to them together. She's getting her
(32:19):
hair done. I can't wait, I said, surprised. Send her
the video. I don't see no laughing emojis, no heart.
Why would you do that before I got home? Because
my real dad wasn't in my life. I didn't even know.
It took me going to therapy to realize. And here's
the other part.
Speaker 3 (32:40):
It's dangerous.
Speaker 4 (32:41):
If you don't think you're doing bad, you're not aware
of what it looks like to other people. Unchecked, you
can do. You can do hurt and harm with good intentions.
I just want to be a good father. But I realized, oh,
I'm I'm stealing moments from you to make sure I
have them. And my therapist, I remember, she was good.
I had a personal therapist, and we had a couple therapists,
(33:03):
and she was like, there's nothing wrong with what you're doing,
but if you're not doing it, if you don't even
know why you're doing it, you're trying to you're trying
to heal yourself, and your kids appreciate that, but you're
doing at the expense of your wife. And I was like,
oh snap. But luckily for me, I was able to
stop that. You know, ten twelve years and two, and
it wasn't all the time. That was just like a
little period. It's like a little period. First ten years
(33:25):
we were broke, ain't no joy. We're doing everything together
because it's all free. Park picnic, zoo, museum, fairy we
were on a boat, y'all. Yes, because it was free.
We went to Canada, y'all, and we came right back.
You don't know that there was a day trip. We
took the pictures like it was a lot. We came
right back home. But there was a little period. We're
(33:46):
doing a little bit so I could do things, and
in that three to five year period, I did maybe
five ten things like that, and in my mind, I'm like,
I'm doing a good job. And Melissa had to tell me, like, yo,
you're like robbing me of these men. It's unfair. And
I'm like, ego wise, I'm like nigga great father. She
(34:07):
was like, yeah, but I want to be a great mother.
And more importantly, I would not do that to you,
and I have not done that to you, and I
actually have way more opportunities to do to do that
because you're gone, but I don't do you like that.
Speaker 3 (34:18):
And I was like, dang.
Speaker 4 (34:19):
So I say all that to say, like, it's so
important to be open to hearing from people, because I
could have went online and you know, my wife tripping
about this man, women could anybody, and I would have
got the and so I was looking for but it
wasn't the truth, because the truth is she was right
(34:41):
and I was wrong even trying to be right.
Speaker 1 (34:43):
Yeah. I love that.
Speaker 2 (34:45):
I love that, and I love you and Melissa, she
was supposed to come today.
Speaker 3 (34:51):
Melissa, you know what, this is part of the thing.
Speaker 4 (34:57):
She takes the the weight of safety and comfortability so
that I can do this because the boys, although nineteen
and seventeen, they want a parent around a lot. Remember
(35:19):
early touring, Melissa used tour with me and we had
like a babysitter and she would keep them for the weekend,
did this for full year. The second year, my youngest
was like, we had to go to therapy with him
because it was like affecting him.
Speaker 3 (35:31):
And he was like, can at least one of you
guys be home?
Speaker 4 (35:34):
And Melissa was like, I'm out, I am done. I
can do this to this. So that's why I would
say it's our dream because she is taking the weight
of missing out on things like this because she wanted
to come. But you know, it's my son's senior year.
He got soccer and driving and all that type of stuff.
And also she just wants to be able to cook
(35:54):
meals so they're not ordering out even though we have
access to those things. She wants to make sure they have,
like because they'll be like when coming home for the time,
y'all be gone, you know what I'm saying. Like they
love her real nick, you know what I'm saying. Even
though my oldiest want to know for us to be home,
for him to be out till three, four, five in
the morning, but he wants us to.
Speaker 1 (36:11):
Be Oh, Christy, I remember you talking about that.
Speaker 4 (36:13):
Oh never nothing. We go to the family dinner, get
home ten thirty. He's all right, see y'all later, what
are you doing to stay home?
Speaker 3 (36:21):
Love us?
Speaker 4 (36:23):
But she takes those moments so that I can do
this for myself, for us, and so the boys have
some semblance of tradition.
Speaker 3 (36:33):
You know.
Speaker 4 (36:34):
She doesn't do it all the time, but she does
it a lot of the times. So we're slowly easing
out of that as they are both be in college
this fall, and even though they'll be at home, it's like, okay, now, now,
hey you eighteen and twenty.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
Yes, mama, I got to have a life.
Speaker 4 (36:53):
I got to go down to keep it positive because
I'm gonna be her armor bear when she comes down here.
But I love I love traveling with her, and she
comes a lot. But she also had and sometimes it's
just like she has her own podcasts, she has her
own things to shoot. That's something else I had to learn, Crystal. Yeah,
come on key, I wanted to kept a woman. I
did not realize it because I didn't have enough money
(37:15):
to keep her early.
Speaker 3 (37:16):
She made more than me. I was kept, so I
kept care.
Speaker 4 (37:21):
I did not realize internally I always wanted to kept
a woman. Yeah, but I did not marry a kept woman.
I married a girl who was ambitious, independent, had her
own money, had her own job always, and I love
those qualities.
Speaker 3 (37:33):
But low key.
Speaker 4 (37:33):
I always when I started getting little bread, I'm like,
why you ain't got to work? What she had the
big cab have that little little aerospace job, Like, I
ain't got it.
Speaker 3 (37:43):
You do what's going to work?
Speaker 4 (37:45):
She liked her job, she was good at her job,
She had work friends, She enjoyed her own things, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (37:52):
She had those things.
Speaker 4 (37:54):
And I remember when she started her podcast way back
with her Homegirl.
Speaker 3 (37:57):
I remember coming home off.
Speaker 4 (37:58):
The road, want her to be at the door pod
roast because I'm a man and I'm went and sold
out these three shows. I want steak and potatoes on
the table when I get home.
Speaker 3 (38:11):
I came home.
Speaker 4 (38:11):
This girl ain't ain't no fool. I don't spell nothing
but but but recording equipment Henson. She in the back
room shooting her podcast. I said, I want potatoes, and.
Speaker 3 (38:27):
Your life is your life. My life is my life.
And then there's our life.
Speaker 4 (38:33):
I can't dominate your life and make you do everything
that I want to do, because then you have no life,
and it's unfair to impress my hopes.
Speaker 3 (38:42):
Dreams for you. I have to work within what you
want for your own life because you you've you've.
Speaker 4 (38:48):
We've committed ourselves to each other, but not our entire
everything like you you know, I don't. And and and
resentment is one of the key tendants to divorce. Yes,
like and resentment is small, It's in the back, and
it gnaws on you.
Speaker 3 (39:04):
It's like an erosion thing.
Speaker 4 (39:06):
It's like he gets to do his thing. I can't
do my thing. I'm always with the kids. You hearing
them Michelle Obama, Like you always get little things like
you go to gym whenever you want, you know, things
like that. So I had to realize I'm trying to
craft her into the perfect woman for me and not
allowing her to be the woman who lives her own life.
And that means sometimes she's not going to come with me.
(39:27):
Sometimes she won't be at my show. I was holding
her to a low ki crystal, and I'm talking a lot.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
I love it.
Speaker 3 (39:32):
Therapy made me realize I was.
Speaker 4 (39:35):
Trying to replace my childhood where my parents weren't there
with my wife in my adult life. Yes, I want
because Loki, my Melissa as my girlfriend, went to more
basketball games in my high school last two years than
anybody in my family. My parents were at work or
they just didn't come, you know, my brother's sister.
Speaker 3 (39:55):
At school doing their own thing. But Melissa was in there.
Speaker 4 (39:57):
Yeah, so I look into the crowd, I'm seeing her
and it stands. So now I want you to be
at every show. And she was like I heard these jokes,
like She's like, I don't want to always like I
got stuff to do, you know what I'm saying. So
I had to again in therapy I found out I said,
(40:19):
I'm putting an unfair wait on you to.
Speaker 3 (40:21):
Be my mom and dad and my real dad.
Speaker 4 (40:23):
You a fully realize adult who has her own idea
of what that day should look like. So that sometimes
means that she's not there. So I appreciate her more
when she is there, and and sometimes she has her
own thing and I support her, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (40:38):
She gets booked to speak or whatever, I'll come out
to her her social media. I'm her armor bearer. But
I can't be. I can't.
Speaker 4 (40:44):
I can't require that for her, for me, for everything
right and have her be happy.
Speaker 1 (40:49):
Yes, exactly that.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
I love that, and I love that you all were
able to communicate, even from parenting to relationship with what
you need as individuals.
Speaker 1 (40:58):
That is so important.
Speaker 4 (41:00):
Yeah, twenty two years married, it'll be twenty two years
in Jane.
Speaker 3 (41:05):
Yeah, twenty seven years told? Is that correct? Yeah? We
started doing no twenty six years told. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (41:11):
Wow.
Speaker 4 (41:12):
And in that time she's changed, and I've changed every
two or three years.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
Let's talk about evolution, like, oh my god, because people
thinking who are you now?
Speaker 1 (41:24):
Like you're gonna continue to evolve?
Speaker 3 (41:26):
Think about it like who you were at sixteen? What
you knew, what you thought you? Yeah, right, that's where
we started.
Speaker 4 (41:34):
We didn't even know what we didn't know, ain't paid
a bill, I know how to be on my own.
Speaker 3 (41:39):
Yeah, okay, right, sixteen?
Speaker 4 (41:42):
So at sixteen living in their parents' house, no car,
no job, full time job, no responsibilities, college Melissa, And
these are just the big ones.
Speaker 3 (41:54):
These are not the small things. I'm just talking about.
Speaker 4 (41:57):
When I first met her, she just finished puberty. Who
were three years prior I met her? At sixteen puberty
what twelve thirteen.
Speaker 3 (42:03):
Maybe up to fifteen sixteen?
Speaker 4 (42:04):
Yeah, still growing, not even as tall as she's supposed
to be. Sixteen eighteen, we're in college. We get married
after our junior year of college. Wow. So now this
is married Melissa, right, who is a church girl who
only knows purity culture and what her mom taught her
and what her pastors in first lead said, she hasn't
you know at that age, we haven't had our own thoughts.
(42:27):
These are just the thoughts that were impressed upon us.
Then there's out of college Melissa, but married right. I
was the first person she lived with that wasn't you
know related to she was virgin. We got married first
pen only pen amen, amen, shout out right. Now now
(42:48):
there's Melissa the mother, right, we get she gets pregnant.
We're twenty three the mother now, mind you, Melissa was
a very career oriented woman.
Speaker 3 (42:57):
I won't say that she didn't wantkids.
Speaker 4 (42:58):
Because it wasn't that, but yeah, her dreams were like
I want to go on Wall Street. I want to
wear pencil skirt, have a briefcase, Like I want to
be a lawyer, want to be a banker.
Speaker 3 (43:06):
So now she's a mother. So now she's realized, oh
d my desires are changing.
Speaker 4 (43:11):
Now I desire to be a mother, like it's important
for me to, you know, scrap book things like that.
Speaker 3 (43:17):
So zero kids, one kid's big change. One kid to
two kids, big change. Her parents got divorced.
Speaker 4 (43:23):
That had a tremendous impact on us, on her because
she idolized that relationship. So now if my parents got divorced,
well that means anybody can get divorced.
Speaker 3 (43:36):
R my parents, who were both saved in the church,
they got divorced.
Speaker 4 (43:42):
Yeah, easily, Kevin and I can get divorced.
Speaker 2 (43:47):
That wasn't a thought, right now that's the reality that
it could.
Speaker 3 (43:51):
Yes.
Speaker 4 (43:51):
Then there's Kevin, the husband who I had always had
a job, kept a job.
Speaker 3 (43:56):
That's one of the things she loved about me.
Speaker 4 (43:58):
Now Kevin wants to be something more or I don't
really know how to do that, so I end up
getting fired.
Speaker 3 (44:04):
So now wait, hold up, you fired?
Speaker 4 (44:06):
And then I'm telling her, low key, I kind of
want to do comedy for a living right from Tacoma.
That ain't even possible, right, like, and it really wasn't
to her credit, I believe.
Speaker 3 (44:18):
So now you got to stay at home husband. Yeah,
and with a huge ego that she was careful to manage.
Speaker 4 (44:25):
You know then I you know, I'm telling her I
want to move to La.
Speaker 3 (44:30):
Later.
Speaker 4 (44:31):
Then there's Melissa, the new family in LA with no bread.
We both worked at boring part of that when kids
were in private school. There was eight kids in my
son's school and iPads like we were killing it, both
making sixty grand a year to us. We over one
hundred grand as a household. Broke boy talking about these planes.
(44:51):
We with the plane.
Speaker 3 (44:52):
People, we out here with the plane. You feel me.
I gotta badge into my job. You just walking here.
He's a walker. I got a five.
Speaker 4 (45:03):
I got a bad Listen had government clearance at her job,
security clearance. So that was a vision fresh and La,
no money, married to a dreamer, and it ain't clicking
right now.
Speaker 3 (45:16):
I'm owe me twenty five dollars for acting.
Speaker 1 (45:19):
I need that run it.
Speaker 3 (45:21):
I need that twenty five. You said Friday, which is Friday.
I don't got no gas. Where's the twenty five?
Speaker 1 (45:28):
Which is why you pay people on time today?
Speaker 4 (45:30):
This is why I don't want nobody patting their pockets
for me.
Speaker 3 (45:35):
And here's the thing, I'm struggling because my company's growing.
Speaker 4 (45:37):
I always pay people on time because I was selling
them cash up and them my finance team business managers.
Speaker 3 (45:43):
Like stop, hey man, you can't do that.
Speaker 4 (45:46):
No, But the thing is they're they're growing and big
company running payroll. There's things out of my control. But
if they go on TikTok, they're not gonna say Kev's
finance team transpots a number. It's gonna be keV on stage.
Speaker 3 (46:01):
Pay me. But that parts now.
Speaker 1 (46:02):
Out of my control because you're a business.
Speaker 3 (46:04):
Because now I'm a business, and I don't I don't
want to get out of it. Yeah, you know.
Speaker 4 (46:08):
My exactess manager was like, it's not a if you
get out of it when it's when, yeah, and what
the penalty is going to be.
Speaker 3 (46:15):
So now I can't like my toes are like this
because this person's check is late.
Speaker 4 (46:18):
Because I remember twenty five, like I literally know. My
kids are like, where's wet? No pre seilings, and I'm
like that twenty five is supposed to be here today.
I was going to get there suons. I had, y'all,
but they didn't get me my twenty five, you know,
And it was never that bad, but it was closed,
like I need all my bread and still.
Speaker 3 (46:38):
Nothing can be leid. So there's keV at that point.
Speaker 4 (46:41):
Then there's keV at All Deaf, And then there's a
realization that when we started working together in this part
of the pandemic, she enjoyed her job. When I worked
at All Deaf and she worked at her aerospace company,
we could come home and.
Speaker 3 (46:53):
Talk about our days. Yes, when we work together, we're
having the same day.
Speaker 1 (46:57):
It's nothing to talk about.
Speaker 4 (46:59):
There's so now we're like, hey, why we ain't really
connect him because we've been in the house all day
and that's just you know, the pandemic exacerbates that to
the nth degree, Like okay, it's not even on the road. Yeah,
why is he going in this office and closing the
door and watching TV?
Speaker 3 (47:15):
And the boys are in their room watching TV. And
we didn't realize.
Speaker 4 (47:19):
And she used to go get her hair done and
get her nails done and stuff like that, and she realized, Oh,
that was my me time.
Speaker 3 (47:23):
Now we don't have that.
Speaker 4 (47:24):
Yeah, why do I feel weird that we're at home?
We don't feel like we're at home. So I say,
it's like I had a cell phone, you know, you
probably did for twenty years. Think about the cell phone
you had, your first Nokia properly yep, with the little snake,
And think about the iPhone you have probably right now.
Imagine if you went from that phone to the iPhone
with nothing in between. Wow, And that's what happens in marriage. Yeah,
(47:48):
you gotta every phone, every update, You gotta learn this
new and just iPhone enough headphone jack o, dang, I
ain't got that, and I gotta get air pods. Now
I gotta charge this now this thing used to not
be there, but from the Nokia Snake when.
Speaker 3 (47:59):
We used to out of dating to the iPhone seventeen.
Speaker 4 (48:02):
Yeah, if I wasn't up to date on every and
think about how little the changes feel at the.
Speaker 3 (48:06):
Time, it's just like, oh, dang, man, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (48:09):
I used to be we used to take pictures. They
used to be grainy, all that stuff. Now you can shoot.
There's a new app you can do a shot recorder.
Speaker 2 (48:17):
I just saw that black owed to man. I saw
that that didn't exist, yeah.
Speaker 3 (48:22):
Two weeks ago. Right.
Speaker 4 (48:23):
So that's what I use as an example, is like
being married is like being up to date on your
cell phone at all. Reading the terms of conditions learning
how to use it at all times. You can't skip
two or three phones. You definitely can't skip five or
ten years. And a lot of times I think what
happens to people don't realize they haven't been paying attention.
And that's how I think. You look at a person
you recognize. I recognize the cell phone, but I actually
(48:46):
don't know how to use it. Yeah, it's like, this
is not an Android disc But but one time I
did a gig and they gave me a free Android
like a phone to use, and I couldn't. It's not
that I couldn't use it, but it just felt so
foreign because I haven't had an Android in years, and
I was like, wow, this feels really uncomfortable. But this
(49:08):
feels like a phone. I know what a phone looks like,
but I can't.
Speaker 3 (49:11):
How do you call it? How do you text?
Speaker 4 (49:13):
I said, I can't do that, and I imagine Android
iPhone the same thing. I'm not dissing, y'all. I don't
dis no more because my Android app uses and they
don't play listen. But I feel like that's what happens
in a relationship. It just feels starts to feel foreign
even though it looks familiar.
Speaker 3 (49:29):
Yeah, oh I killed that.
Speaker 1 (49:30):
You did, y'all give it?
Speaker 3 (49:32):
Clip it.
Speaker 1 (49:33):
That was so good. That's a whole teaser right there.
Speaker 4 (49:36):
But I think people say marriage is work. They think
it means like hard. I hate It's not that. It's
just like it's like gardening. Yes, you got to go
out there until it and water it, protect it from
the sun. You gotta nurture it. And that's the work.
It's not. It's not like breaking rocks. But it's also
you can't leave a garden unattended for weeks and months
(49:57):
and expected.
Speaker 3 (49:57):
To bear good fruit. You have to pay it.
Speaker 4 (49:59):
Good gardeners are out there every day, pulling bugs off,
whatever it takes to make sure this is always bearing
good fruit. And that marriage is like a continual garden.
It's like working out and eating right.
Speaker 3 (50:11):
You can't.
Speaker 4 (50:12):
If you stop working out and eating right, the work
also stops. You start getting back. It's the same thing.
Speaker 3 (50:19):
But I enjoy the fruit of this work, so.
Speaker 4 (50:23):
I don't mind doing it because although it's hard and
you know, you know, tough, the benefits are amazing.
Speaker 3 (50:31):
I can't imagine.
Speaker 4 (50:33):
I can't imagine trying to date right now, but what
I see from people.
Speaker 3 (50:37):
It looks like the Thriller music video. That's what y'all.
The way y'all talk you talk about. I mean, it
seems scary out there.
Speaker 4 (50:46):
I don't it's like zombie apocalypse, Like I don't want
to be out there with y'all.
Speaker 3 (50:52):
I like my house, you're.
Speaker 1 (50:57):
Gonna be running back.
Speaker 3 (51:00):
I'm sorry, I'm coming on.
Speaker 1 (51:05):
This has been amazing. Seriously, we gotta do this more often.
Speaker 4 (51:09):
Melissa this Yeah, Melissa for sure wants to come back.
We'll be back in Atlanta two or three times in
this month. Okay, so to have her next time, we can,
but thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (51:21):
Absolutely.
Speaker 4 (51:22):
Also, let me give you your flowers while we're here.
You are so talented as a as a person. You
read that Bible on your Instagram stories. You either really
read it or you spend so much time thinking you
might as.
Speaker 3 (51:33):
Well have read read you. You're so photogenic and fashion forward.
Speaker 4 (51:40):
I'd be like your pos is being listen look, and
she'd be like that, Crystal Rene done it again.
Speaker 3 (51:45):
She went down to Paris and she did it again.
Speaker 4 (51:47):
But more importantly, your personality and your spirit is as
warm as you come across on screen in person, just
like you said about me, it's true about you. Sometimes
that is a facade. Sometimes the actor is is acting
all the other time and Christal Renee is the character.
Speaker 3 (52:06):
But you have the same character from the moment I.
Speaker 4 (52:08):
Met you at t s U to BT when you
thought I said you was eating ham, I.
Speaker 1 (52:13):
Said, you said, I said Lamb. I said, yeah, the
precious Lamb.
Speaker 3 (52:24):
But I love the community you built.
Speaker 4 (52:26):
I love this this uh, this this podcast, and I
know that there's this. You created a space for women
who need it, people who need it, and your team
has been amazing as well. Everybody was very kind, and
it's it's You're just great.
Speaker 3 (52:39):
Thank you, thank you.
Speaker 1 (52:42):
That means a lot coming from you.
Speaker 3 (52:43):
Thank you, thank you.
Speaker 2 (52:44):
Before we leave, is there anything that our community can
support you on.
Speaker 3 (52:48):
Yes, that we got coming up.
Speaker 4 (52:51):
There's no dates yet, but just follow me kem on stage.
Everything I can talk about or I want to tell
you about, just follow me out.
Speaker 3 (52:59):
I'll talk about it. Greef Sucks.
Speaker 4 (53:01):
Larger tour coming this summer into the fall. Watch me
on to B. I've got some stuff on to B
that's out and some more will be coming out soon.
I don't know the day, so I don't want to
you know, just follow me, yes, Kep on stage. If
you follow me, you'll you'll I'll be able to tell you.
Speaker 2 (53:19):
Okay, awesome, thank you so much before we get out
of here. Are thinking for this season, we're leaning more
into being unapologetic. So I want to know what is
keV being unapologetic about in this season of his life.
Speaker 3 (53:30):
Oh, that's a great question.
Speaker 4 (53:35):
I am being unapologetically mean, and I think that means
I am finally accepting that you might not like me
or what I say. And I'm okay with that because
earlier in my life and earlier my content career career,
I was I was trying to make every single person
happy and that was not.
Speaker 3 (53:59):
Entertainable thing.
Speaker 4 (54:01):
So now I am realizing to be myself, I have
to accept that some people won't like that, and they'll
vocalize that, and they'll thread about it and tweet about
it and TikTok about it. And also, like, at my
level of awareness, it's advantageous for people to talk about
me negatively because your video or your thread or tweet
(54:24):
or podcasts it will often do well. I don't like that.
I really hate that, but there's nothing I can do
about that. And I certainly won't try to appease millions
of people because that have millions of followers who actually
like me, multiple millions of people who don't follow me
and may not like me, So I can't control all
(54:46):
those variable I think it comes from a control. And
as a comedian, if you have a thousand people laughing
but to not laughing, you focus on those two.
Speaker 3 (54:53):
You perform live, you want to hit everybody. Yes I'm
killing right.
Speaker 4 (54:59):
Now, and you just can't do that, and you'll be
racking your brain trying to. So I be having to
be quiet, and you know, meaningless. Have realized the other
week this phrase that we came up with, like not
saying anything is not the same as having nothing to say.
Speaker 3 (55:16):
I often choose not to say.
Speaker 1 (55:18):
That's good.
Speaker 4 (55:19):
Sometimes I just don't say anything because I know if
I address a thing, it's just gonna magnify it.
Speaker 1 (55:24):
Can't give everything energy.
Speaker 4 (55:25):
Don't mean it, don't mean I aven't seeing it, don't
mean I don't have thoughts. But my thoughts are for
my family and friends and maybe sometimes even my actual
audience who cares. But I'm also not gonna give negativity
what they want, which is more visibility. You're gonna die
on that vine. I'm not gonna tell that guarded. Yes,
you're gonna have to You're gonna have to keep the
hate training. I ain't gonna help you talk about me,
(55:49):
absolutely not.
Speaker 3 (55:51):
Thank you very much so much.
Speaker 2 (55:57):
You know what says with me from this conversation is
a reminder that growth doesn't always look like clarity. Sometimes
it looks like showing up honestly, even while you're still processing. Kevin,
want to thank you for your honesty, your perspective, and
willingness to hold both humor and heaviness at the same time,
because sometimes healing isn't about having the right words, It's
(56:19):
about being present.
Speaker 1 (56:20):
Being real, and align yourself to keep going. Thank you
so much for tuning in. Be sure to subscribe, share this.
Speaker 2 (56:27):
Episode with someone who needs it, and if you ever
need advice, positivity, or want to share what you're going through,
email us at Keep it Positive Outcomes at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1 (56:36):
It's always stay blessed, stay encouraged, and keep you positive.
Speaker 2 (56:40):
Dy.
Speaker 1 (56:40):
I'll see you guys next time.
Calling all my sweeties to the forefront.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
I'm your host, christ and this is to keep it positive, Sweetie.
Show welcome to keep it positive, sweetye the place where
we he'll grow and learn together.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Today's guest is a comedian.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
Creator and storyteller who has built his voice on truth,
using humor to reflect real life in a way that
resonates deeply with so many. I am so glad to
be sitting with keV on stage. keV on Stage is
known for his ability to take everyday moments, relationships, family, faith,
and culture and turn them into something both humorous and honest.
(00:39):
But beyond the laughter, he's also creating space for deeper conversations.
From his serious safe Space to his hit one man
show Grief Sucks, he's exploring what it looks like to
navigate love, lost, growth in real time without pretending that
you have to have it all figured out. Sweetie, please
give a very warm welcome to my keV on stay.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
Praise the Lord, sweeties, Praise the Lord. We're here in
the room. We've been trying to make this happen for
a long time we have, and you're finally here, finally
here here.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
I'm so excited.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Great thank you for having me. No, thank you, of course,
I know.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
I mean you're not. You don't live in Atlanta, so
thank you for.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
Having in Atlanta. But when I come, I'll be like, man,
I should live here. I'm telling you it is so black. Yes,
everything black, Everything that's good about being black is here.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
It is really creative.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Is the culture of the community regular black. It ain't
just just black people, Southern charm. Traffic I could do without.
You know, go out to mcdonna though. Traffic should not
go out to make and didn't used to go out
to McDonough.
Speaker 4 (01:44):
But they go out mcdonna though. As far so, that's
the lucky I've been telling people. It's worse than LA here.
You think, so I do LA in the heart of
the city. It makes sense. Atlanta's traffic is further in
the hardest. It's like everywhere, and then the little back
roads ain't back road. Everybody knows that, lady, so are
(02:05):
we Yep, I've been using this for you.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Ain't no tricks, ain't no treat.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
You are right, Yes, you're absolutely right. That's I didn't
think that. I feel like since twenty twenty.
Speaker 4 (02:14):
It's gotten when i've been I come to Atlanta two
or three five times a year over the last six
seven years.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
It's crazy. And I live in l A. I know,
bad trapping. Yeah, Atlanta's worse.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Dang Atlanta, get it together.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
Everybody moving here to chase they.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Drink, listen and say that money that money on Mary Camp,
thank you so much for coming today.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
I remember we first officially.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
I've been a fan of yours before we actually met,
but we met on the shops HBCU tour and TSU Yes,
And at that moment, I was like, man, he is
who he is, because you know, sometimes.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
You meet people you've been a fan, but then can
beat me like he died, he said he is.
Speaker 4 (02:55):
I really appreciate that compliment. I've been getting that compliment
a lot. And I work very hard to be who
I am all the time.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
And that doesn't mean I'm perfect like.
Speaker 4 (03:07):
I but I but I genuinely try to be consistent,
you know what I mean. I don't have this like
because now you know, we live in a world of authenticity.
You if you aren't who you are, they will people
will find out anyway. So it's not like we ain't
wrestlers in the eighties and like there's too many stories,
too many people we act with that we don't know
(03:27):
who knows them, especially you. And now you be on set,
somebody gonna be on that set that knows somebody else,
that knows.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
You so exactly. So I don't.
Speaker 4 (03:35):
I don't.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
I don't do that.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
I try not to do that.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
That is, I don't do meet and greets. I don't
do meet greets for years.
Speaker 4 (03:47):
But I'm gonna tell you why I stop. I'm gonna
tell you exactly why I realized. I always love the people,
but I can't keep up the the energy to make
their experience good.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
If I've just done a show hard, it's hard.
Speaker 4 (04:05):
I tell people I've been doing this joke on stage,
Like imagine you just worked your full shift and then
you ready to go home, rub your feet together, and
instead of doing that, you gotta shake three hundred hands
and take.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
Three hundred That's the perfect analogy. You'd be like, man
and then doing it before a show.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
I'm like, I don't want to use all my energy
because the people pay to see me.
Speaker 3 (04:24):
You want to give them that, So I can't manage it.
So I can only do meet if it's if that's
the event.
Speaker 4 (04:29):
Yeah, because I know, okay, for two hours, three hours,
I can give you anything. Yeah, and after a show.
But I just say that because I don't. I'm not
perfect here thinking about my job that I don't like.
But that's really more because I don't want to disappoint
people that I don't like people.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
I love people. I wouldn't be where I am, wouldn't.
Speaker 4 (04:45):
Be sitting here without the people, for sure, but I
don't want them to be like man, he was kind
of like he was tired, because I'm I am tired,
and I likely flew overnight to do this, Like here,
I took a red out last night.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
Did you sweep it on plane? Ain't real?
Speaker 1 (05:03):
It's not real.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
It ain't real. I ain't got no private with everybody else,
so that ain't no bad. It is not. So I
just wanted to I'm not perfect, y'all. Don't don't. Don't
do that to me.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Nobody is perfect.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
But you know what, I think comedians are in people's
eyes somewhat don't have a They think you don't have
a bad day, or they think that things is like
they want you to be on all the time. What
kind of pressure does that put on you when you
feel like man like I'm really tired or I'm just
having a day.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
But they won't make me laugh.
Speaker 4 (05:35):
I don't respond well to make me laugh or tell
me a joke. I am not a clown. You don't
see no red. No, you come to see me work.
Speaker 3 (05:44):
I give you my show. But people are often surprised.
They'll be like, Liz, I bet you has you cracking
up at home all the time?
Speaker 4 (05:51):
No, not really, because at home I don't be like
Lizen tell me about the time. So it's like I
got to take the trash out watching Love Overboard, like
I got to perform for her. But my wife, yeah
and she you know my kids, I ain't funny to
them no more anyway, you know.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
Tony Beaker or Tony Beker, Patrick Cloud.
Speaker 4 (06:14):
But like I imagine, you know, like I take the
approach that once I leave my house, I am on. Yes,
So if I try to have good energy with anybody
at me, but at home.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
I'd be at the house.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
It's a recharge.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
I recharged.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
I enjoyed my home, I enjoyed my family. I enjoy
just chilling watching YouTube. I'm not like trying jokes out
on my family. I mean, I'm funny, but I'm not
like performative fun exactly that.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
I love that.
Speaker 3 (06:41):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
When did you realize that you were funny?
Speaker 3 (06:45):
Very early?
Speaker 4 (06:46):
I remember very early and I, and not only did
I was funny. I realized there was a benefit to
being funny.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
And it was very simple. After church, I must have
been like five.
Speaker 4 (06:54):
Or six years old, I would mimic what happened in
church that day, and my grandma home was very stoneface.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
In church was not like that. At home, my grandma.
Speaker 4 (07:03):
Would be like, do sister Daniel shallcap or whatever Washington do?
And I realized when she let me do that, I
would like my bed at eight o'clock, it's eight fifteen, Like, if.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
You do that thing, you can stay up.
Speaker 4 (07:16):
So I immediately knew I could do something that made
people laugh and there was a value to it. Yes,
So I was like, oh, yeah, attention this, I can
do this.
Speaker 3 (07:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
So, and it's so interesting that I was just telling
somebody this. I realized what I do now is a
version of what I did as a kid.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Literally literally.
Speaker 4 (07:33):
I remember we used to have like talent shows and
we would do you know, people sing or whatever.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
I mean.
Speaker 4 (07:39):
My brother would do like sketches in church, and we
would mix like we did a David and Alive sketch
and I was Goliath and he was David.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
You though, my older brother and.
Speaker 4 (07:48):
I did like we were like we should do mc
hammer can't touch this, and then you sling shot me.
So I was like mixing hip hop and R and
B into church even at like seven, like I was
always aware of what was and he in the world
and always current and Hammer was like it might have
been ninety two, so I must have been nine whatever.
Hammer was at his like apex. Yes, So I realized
(08:10):
it's that's what I do now on the Internet and
my shows or whatever. It's like a version of that.
And I've just been thinking about how much God puts
in people very young, like I just did, uh, do
you know Luke.
Speaker 3 (08:22):
Luke Tilmeny's little kid. He was on Jenifferunson Show.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Yes, yeah, yeah, exactly, show all the fun that he.
Speaker 3 (08:28):
Does he does preaching it out. Yes, So we did.
Speaker 4 (08:33):
American Idol invited us last night and he was like
the co host, Crystal, there's a we in a set
with you. You've been on movies like three four hundred,
five hundred people. We're live on American idol. He preaching
on Q, praying on Q, singing on Q. He's like
seven eight years old. And I told my wife, I said, oh,
God put that in him early. And thankfully for him,
(08:55):
his family is nurturing the gift because I think a
lot of times our gift is there, but it's not
always nurtured by our family. And sometimes it's not because
they don't see it. Yeah, sometimes they just can't. Yes,
you know what I mean. But what a gift to
have a family and a way to nurture your gift
from seven eight years old.
Speaker 3 (09:14):
This is a little kid on Instagram. He's like nine.
Speaker 4 (09:16):
He's a fashion designer and his family has spent bread. Wow,
and he's cutting dresses and style and stuff, and it's like,
your gift is there. Yeah, he's a prodigy, but like
how many, especially Black people, we often aren't able to
express that at a young age because we don't have
access to the same resources freedom, even like auditions.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
You kid in Hollywood, your parents.
Speaker 4 (09:38):
I couldn't take Isay and them the audition everything by Yeah,
he's got to get some of these because I can
keep going up down to one on one. You ain't
booking gas is gas. I gotta leave work go to school.
Hey man, it's just regular now, you just kid kids
school ABC one two three. Because I can't do brother,
I can't be taken off work for you to you
(10:00):
maybe not gonna get it right.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
And I love you.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Yeah, yea.
Speaker 4 (10:10):
So so I just I think my family didn't push
my gift down.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
That's amazing.
Speaker 4 (10:15):
And I had a place to express it, which, you know, interestingly,
interestingly enough was the Black Church. Yeah, and my church
was allowed us to be more than singers.
Speaker 3 (10:23):
And musicians exactly. I was able to do acting and
other stuff in addition to singing.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
So that was Turkey before Churchy.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
That was Churchy before Churchy. That's why Churchy was so
easy for me to create because that was.
Speaker 4 (10:36):
Like, that's shape that we hadn't done an episode that
wasn't directly from my life in somewhere. Those characters are
mother Jeene is based on my grandma, and my grandma's
name is Ruthie Gene.
Speaker 3 (10:50):
So like these people are just yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
And we resonate. I feel like I was just talking
to somebody. It's like it doesn't matter where you're from.
There are certain parts of the black culture that everybody
gets and church is one of.
Speaker 3 (11:04):
Us that you understand. You have to be there, you.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Know, yes, totally said.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
He talked about as a parent nurturing the gifts. You're
a father of two sons, how are you nurturing their gifts?
Speaker 3 (11:20):
Now? You know? I think it's so interesting.
Speaker 4 (11:24):
I have two kids who are so different you wouldn't
think they're related. So my oldest is they're both creative,
but they're in creative very different ways. My oldest is
behind the camera. He used to do stop motion videos.
He'll spend hours animating like on his iPad, creates storylines
on ww like. He's always creative writing. He acts too,
(11:48):
but his interest is always behind the camera, creating story
My youngest has zero those interests. But when you put
in front of microphone or camera, he just has something.
He has some spark. I mean when they were very
young and they were an awesome this TV and we
were getting paid five hundred dollars per sketch for me
to write, direct, edit, produce and share the bread with them, Wow,
(12:08):
my youngest would not be wanting to do it. My
oldest had the work ethic. He's just like yo, I'm
gonna be on time. I'm gonna do my job, whether
once or not. My youngest was like David Ruffin, like
I don't do I ain't doing this today, and now
I don't feel like it. And I remember telling the
people to it's like, hey, brother, I'm not finna deal
with with him. I ain't finna do this, and they
were like, you are because when the camera gets on him,
(12:31):
he just has something, I think, and he's super competitive
in that way. They're both athletic. But my youngest is
very competitive. My oldest isn't. So for my oldest, it's
like animation, subscriptions, here's my camera, you can do stop motion,
here's how you do that, here's how you edit. My
youngest is like, we'll do a podcast. We used to
(12:52):
do a podcast together. He was like, let's do one
episode and I was like, let's do six to eight
little season going and go ass.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
He was like, let's just do one. But we shoot
videos together sometimes.
Speaker 4 (13:02):
But I also don't put too much pressure on them
at this age because I still want them to do
it because they really love it. It's not like a desire.
I don't have to desire to like exploit them. I
wish I did. I wish I had like that. You know,
Matthew knows Joe Jackson, you know King Richard things now
we need that. We need them daddists and them mamas.
(13:26):
Are you getting the great if you watch the Olympics?
Them kids be like I low key hated by parents
because they made me do stuff I didn't want to
do because they saw greatness.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
We're too nice of the kid.
Speaker 4 (13:36):
Joe Jackson said, I got to y'all got to work.
Michael and them was at work at an adult club
at seven. You know, I'm like, oh, my son, I
love you mental health, mental health. He ain't gonna be
Michael Jackson because I didn't push him and any so
you know that whooping is bad, but also Michael Jackson's bad.
Speaker 3 (13:55):
The album Hello, it all works together.
Speaker 4 (13:59):
We ain't seen no level start with the loving gentle
pant all. I'm saying, I at love nobody into greatness yet. Listen,
we we've done cool, but we ain't love nobody healthily
into greatness because you've got to be a little crazy
to reach them levels. You know, you got to hate.
They hated Joe Jackson my life because I hate you.
Speaker 3 (14:21):
Love ain't enough. I got to hate you to get
where I want to go.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
Literally, that is so crazy because we talk about the
work ethic that we have from our generation to now,
we're like gods. They just like quit stuff and they're
just like fly by night. You like, you gotta stick
to something, you know, you gotta have some discipline, sure,
and they don't have it.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
You know.
Speaker 4 (14:42):
It's funny every generation says that about the next generation.
They said that about us, and I'm like, y'all, that's
not me.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
No, it's not my group. Yeah, but it ain't it
ain't it. I'm at work, think about everybody, everybody working.
Everybody ain't working as hard as you know, even if
if you're millennials, ain't.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
Working as hard as sister.
Speaker 3 (14:59):
See what, some people just turn it in. They ain't
got no studio. You know, you you do it all.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
So I think there's always standouts in for sure, average
people in any generation.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
But I feel like we was Devin for sure.
Speaker 4 (15:15):
We didn't even let me explain. That's the thing that
I don't. I don't mind whooping for wrong. Like growing up,
I got whooped when I was right. And if you
would have just let me explain, you would have seen it.
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Actually wasn't what you thought.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
And then my parents find out later they ain't gonna
undo the whooping, and they ain't gonna say sorry, you
want something to eat?
Speaker 3 (15:34):
No, no, I want you to listen. Okay, you have
to feed me.
Speaker 4 (15:39):
If you would have just gave me three seconds, I
could have told you what happened. But no, no, not,
I got that little game. You wanted an apology.
Speaker 2 (15:50):
I take the game, but I wanted the apology.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
That is hilarious.
Speaker 2 (16:00):
At what point did you realize that humor wasn't just
a way to get through life, but the way you
actually process life?
Speaker 1 (16:07):
Because I feel like you kind of I'll watched.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
You on your Instagram videos and you kind of talk
things through in a humorous way.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
How do you do that?
Speaker 3 (16:15):
I think I realized.
Speaker 4 (16:18):
All the way back to medieval times, the court jester
was allowed to speak truth to power because.
Speaker 3 (16:25):
It was lace with humor.
Speaker 4 (16:27):
Yes, people can listen, are more open to listening if
you've made them laugh. Now, even let you get on
him a little bit if you're making them laugh. So
I think comedy definitely has a place in speaking truth
to power, right, Drew Ski.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
Does a good job of this.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
Yes, Like when he did the megachurch pastors thing. There's
people who were rightfully upset. Yeah, but at the same time,
the argument, you can't argue that he's coming up with
nothing of nowhere.
Speaker 3 (16:59):
We see these videos. I've seen Zipline Pastor, I've seen.
Speaker 4 (17:02):
Door Jacket, So he's able to make that video and
then people are like, well, let's talk about this because
it didn't come out of the thin air. It wouldn't
ring true if it came out of there. Their same
thing with the conservative video that he did. People are upset,
but I remember some of those clips where he did
it almost verbat him. Obviously he's adding humor to it
as well. But you think about George Carlin and Eddie Murphy.
(17:23):
Great comedians have always had the ability to speak true
to power, to speak to something larger and kind of
cover it with honey through jokes. And I think my
new Grief Suck Show is that ability for grief. I think,
you know, I had people die, but I never grieved
the way I grieve when I lost my brother. Yeah,
(17:44):
and I started just making videos. I didn't have a
desire or never thought I could even do stand up
about grief. But every video I made, which I wasn't
even necessarily being funny per se. I was just sharing
what I would. I mean, it was funny, but it's
not like funny haha. It's more like, oh my gosh,
more relatable funny. Yes, but I would see the comments
of like, oh my god, thank you. I thought I
(18:04):
was the only one things like that. And I think
this new show is my way of helping people through
grief and also helping myself through grief as well. And
I think it's to me, it's the best use of
my comedy that I've done. I think it's the I
wouldn't say my comedy's ever helped people process before. I
think I've made you laugh and made you forget about
(18:26):
your problems. That type of stuff, which also has its
place because the world sucks.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
That's the next show.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
Yeah, the grief suns the world sun.
Speaker 4 (18:36):
But you know, we all sit in our driveway after
a long day and we want something to just laugh at.
I definitely can do that. But I think with this show,
I'm able to help you process something that you're going
through or you will go through. Like that's the thing
about grief. If you're blessed to live a long life,
grief is inevitable. You won't live to seventy or eighty
(18:57):
without losing someone or something. Even though grief isn't all death,
like sometimes you grief friendships people who are alive and healthy,
and y'all just go separate ways, Like that's also a
grief the jobs you lost, all kinds of things. So
I think that's what humor is to me right now.
But at the same time, I always be able to
just make people.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
Live in that you create the show. Grief sucks. Like
you said, death is something that we are all.
Speaker 2 (19:25):
Nobody can escape it right right in that moment, How
did you How did you handle that before it turned
into humor?
Speaker 4 (19:33):
The crazy thing it turned into humor instantly. Really, I
just think it's the way I see the world, like
you were saying, it is how I process things.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
It's not the only way.
Speaker 4 (19:44):
Yeah, but jokes come to me the way I imagine
a fish naturally swims. It's like I actually have to
stop myself and be like, I don't know if it
might be too early, right, So I had a lot
of internal things that I'm noticing, not even putting them
in a place. But when I first kid you not
Crystal When I first saw my brother in the coffin
(20:06):
for the first time, my initial thought was this nigga
really in her dad?
Speaker 3 (20:13):
No joke? I said, well, I can't say that, my grandma.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
Right, like this, nigga, are you get up right?
Speaker 4 (20:20):
Get out of these people's stuff which is not funny,
but like it's funny, you know. And I remember when
I was calling the funeral home. I spoke to this
lady for like ten minutes. I said, hey, you know,
because my first time planning a funeral, said hey, you know,
how do you get the body to actually said, my
name is Kevin, my brother passed aways my first time.
(20:42):
How do you get the body from the hospital to
the morgue? And if he wants to get buried somewhere else?
Do you guys handle this? How do you you know
who does an autopsy on the body? Answer all these questions?
And she said, wait, are you the body? I said,
love body, my brother's body.
Speaker 3 (21:01):
Body can be the body if I'm talking to you.
Speaker 4 (21:03):
If I'm the body that I'm talking about right now, Dad,
you should start praying.
Speaker 3 (21:08):
Right because I could what that means for you if
the body is.
Speaker 4 (21:11):
Making its own plans dead and a lot so I
made that video out of frustration and it went crazy.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
People are like, I have struggled with that. I said,
I people in funeral homes to be good at their job.
If you had Chipota you forgetting my cheese, that's fine. Yeah,
if you don't know, you put the person that dead
is alive. The big problem is a big problem.
Speaker 4 (21:31):
So so I think in that way, humor just iss.
It is my It's part of my process, but it's
not the only thing. I definitely cried and anger, frustration,
all the other parts of grief.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
But I think humor is my mechanism for processing anything.
Speaker 4 (21:49):
And I definitely have to like keep it at bay
sometimes to make sure because a lot of comedy is timing.
Speaker 3 (21:55):
Sometimes you're too early. People like, hey, it ain't yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
Yeah, I wasn't exactly for sure. Grandma would have definitely like, X,
give me a minute exactly.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Oh my goodness, sold out shows, so greefus you've had
So how does that feel to know?
Speaker 4 (22:15):
Then it's like, believe it or not. I am genuinely
surprised every single time a show.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
So that's good.
Speaker 4 (22:22):
I am like, because none of this is given right
and you got to stay relevant stay interesting. You can't
control the economy, gas prices, all these things people's.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
And people's choices.
Speaker 4 (22:35):
I can't control the things in your life. So to
convince enough people to spend ten dollars thirty dollars, just
start a ticket. And I'm well aware that it's never
just a ticket. Its ticket parking, babysitter, baby, dinner. Sometimes
you're flying or driving, so it's gas. Like a thirty
dollars ticket can cost you four five hundred.
Speaker 3 (22:54):
Dollars off work. Yeah, yeah, everything I got to I
got to line.
Speaker 1 (23:00):
Yeah, you know. Uh, but.
Speaker 4 (23:06):
It is genuinely surprising every time. For whatever reason, I
always think I'm going to fall off.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
Really, you know, I feel like that may be like
a great place to kind of sit though, so like
it shows you like you're not in control.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
Like so every time it's like, you know what you did?
Speaker 3 (23:20):
That that's a good point.
Speaker 1 (23:22):
I feel like we get too ahead of ourselves.
Speaker 3 (23:24):
Yeah, because it's not a given, you know what, I
can come to.
Speaker 4 (23:27):
Like Atlanta's the city I do well and pretty much
every time, but that sometimes they jumps out early. Sometimes
it's closer to the end, yeah, sometimes, you know. So
it's it's always a fear of mind to and I
don't sell out every show, and I make it pretty
obvious what I'm doing poorly because it's.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
Just part of it.
Speaker 3 (23:50):
Yeah, the game.
Speaker 4 (23:51):
But I am super grateful that people take their heart
earned money and give it to me to make them laugh.
Speaker 3 (23:59):
For an I don't take that for granted.
Speaker 4 (24:02):
It's really a blessing to me and a blessing in
them in the in the sense of like entertainment, but
it's not.
Speaker 3 (24:10):
It's not guaranteed. You know.
Speaker 4 (24:12):
We see artists, musicians, athletes, artists, entertainers canceling tours, canceling
shows because the ticket sales.
Speaker 3 (24:19):
Yeah, that's devastating, it is. You know, it's like, what
did I do?
Speaker 4 (24:23):
I ain't funny no more, and it ain't to be
all marriad reason maybe you ain't funny no more, maybe
you ain't connecting. But yeah, it's also gonna be mad.
I ain't got no job, child support up? Yeahs up everything.
Speaker 3 (24:35):
Flights or flights out Atlanta crazy right now?
Speaker 4 (24:37):
Listen what is happening at down to Hartsville Jackson.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
Flights is out with a straight face, down to twelve hundred.
Speaker 1 (24:46):
Yeah, when for the regular listen.
Speaker 3 (24:50):
Twelve hundred dollars for regular seat.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Thy whole budget for this next business?
Speaker 3 (24:55):
I said, what listen, I have a production coming up
next week.
Speaker 4 (24:59):
I had to cut back the amount of cast that
I could fly because I'm like, I can't. We budgeted
fifty a flight.
Speaker 1 (25:07):
And that's a lot.
Speaker 3 (25:07):
That's a lot that should.
Speaker 4 (25:09):
Be under every city in America for the most part,
if you're out far enough, that should be under budget. Yeah,
Atlanta was like twelve thirteen hundred dollars for main cabin CS.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
Crazy.
Speaker 4 (25:22):
I'm here in Atlanta by myself because I usually read
my team and it's like, at those prices.
Speaker 3 (25:27):
I can't.
Speaker 4 (25:28):
I can't afford to do. I got kids. I'm gonna
have two kids in college.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
You know.
Speaker 3 (25:34):
My son said, Look.
Speaker 4 (25:35):
My son ordered STK on on Uber eats STK. He
said STK. I said, can you order that from me?
I said maybe McDonald's, Mike Chick fil A. Then he
gonna say. I said, okay, man, because I was ordering
it for myself, I said, how do you want your steak?
(25:56):
He said medium rare? I said medium rare? Why he
was like, you know, the time it travels from there
to hear it cooks up to highlight it.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
I said, I've ordered this before.
Speaker 4 (26:11):
Hold up the time it travels.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
How you even thinking?
Speaker 4 (26:18):
And he said, if I want to reheat it and
then it'll be well, I can't have Well that man,
look at God, because I never even thought to do that.
That never even got to pick dinner. Really once for dinner,
that's not even a question. I got to ask Hamburger Helper, right, Annie,
shut up, it's one of the two gonna be in there,
(26:43):
spaghetti from Thursday on Tuesday. And that man said medium
rare because it finishes cooking while it sits.
Speaker 3 (26:50):
Wow, serve, what a mighty guy.
Speaker 1 (26:56):
What do you do? Listen? And that's what you do
it for so your son can order stk on.
Speaker 4 (27:03):
And the funny thing about it is I said that
story because they both go to college and they want
to stay at home, and.
Speaker 1 (27:09):
They're like, it probably feels good.
Speaker 4 (27:12):
You know what, I ain't gonna hold you, Crystal. My
son went on a retreat. My son goes to private
Catholic school and they went on like a little retreat
that was like Christianity based, Like because it's a private
Catholic school, you don't have to go, but it's like
a tradition and he was he was sharing with us
when he came back. You know, we used to go
to like little revivals, team retreats. We used to come
(27:33):
back on fire for God, like I'm sorry God. I
was kissing before, I'm not gonna kiss no more. And
I did a little hunchy, but I ain't gonna hunch
at the last locker and I did touch that girl,
but she said I could because that was locker. Was
a little bit of sin how I was raised. But
after that retreat, that revival of that team revival, I
came back on fire. I spoke in tongues God, I'm
(27:54):
sorry for everything. So it was like the Catholic version
of that would know holy ghost in the sense that
we have. And he gave us the greatest compliment. He
was saying, like, you know, a lot of the kids
were sharing like their parents are abusive, or they are
you know, drunk or not in their life. And he
said when he said he never realized when it was
(28:16):
his turn, he was like, hey, my parents are.
Speaker 3 (28:20):
Nice, they are.
Speaker 4 (28:23):
You know, and he was like he didn't really like
He's like I knew I had good parents, but I
never because all these kids were holding all their stuff
in It was like a real like they were all
breaking down their walls and stuff. We had like a
little ceremony where all the kids talked about it.
Speaker 3 (28:36):
They crying and stuff. It was crazy. And he was like,
I didn't realize.
Speaker 4 (28:39):
How much I appreciated you guys and how easy my
life has been because of what you've done.
Speaker 3 (28:44):
And you're not talking about money.
Speaker 4 (28:46):
He's talking about love, respect, treating him well, not being abusive.
And he's like, I don't you guys haven't even Yeah,
I never even heard you guys yell at each other.
He's heard us argue, and I think there's a difference.
A lot of times parents try not to have any
conflict in front of the kids.
Speaker 3 (29:01):
You got realize how to do everything exactly. You have
to teach them how to even have conflict safely.
Speaker 4 (29:07):
I never cussed that melicitia. You never cussed me. I
never threw no play. I don't talk crazy, nurse, she
don't talk crazy to me. But we have had discussions, yes, amen,
in front of our kids, because that's also modeling that
behavior is. So that was the best compliment I was
telling my son. I checked with him a lot, like
how we doing his parents like, I don't want you
all to go therapy. And my oldest son said to
be like two days ago, He's like, you never noticed
(29:28):
how we always want to be at home. Wow, given
the choice to do other things, like we come home.
We didn't go away to college, even we be international,
like we prefer home. He was like, that's the proof
that you guys are doing a good job.
Speaker 3 (29:41):
So I think that. I was like, will Smith to this,
because that's that's eighteen nineteen years of doing the right thing.
You can't you can't just turn it in.
Speaker 4 (29:58):
Ain't no money gonna fix the like kids with money,
that money does not replace time. Like I had to
go to my son's games. Yes, them soccer games these
last two seasons. Them boys getting blown out on clubs.
We're paying thousand dollars to go. Got y'all get smacked
around in San Diego. Now I got to drive back.
(30:20):
You sleep right and musty, and I got to drive back,
windows down.
Speaker 3 (30:25):
I can still smell you. Are your shoes off. Let's
just stop by this little Marry'll take you a little shout.
Speaker 4 (30:34):
Let's spend the night. And I was asking myself. I
was like, he was like, I was like, have we
went to enough games. He was like, you guys have
been to games my whole life. We're going away games.
They getting smacked around in soccer, volleyball. His teams have
been losing a lot lately, but we being there, Yeah,
clapping it up because money doesn't replace that.
Speaker 3 (30:52):
You can only earn that through time. And we have
spent the time with our.
Speaker 4 (30:57):
Kids to earn their love and respect and all that
type of stuff. I think that might be one of
the things I'm most proud of, is like being a
good father to them. But if I can be honest, Christopher,
they hazel it. Sometimes I was a better father than
a husband, and I was a better father at the
expense of being a good husband without knowing, Yes, because
I didn't have my real dad in my life. Yeah,
(31:19):
so I remember early on like i'n I'm gonna rectify that.
But what that unchecked?
Speaker 3 (31:25):
Unchecked?
Speaker 4 (31:26):
I made my wife miss out on moments, right, Like,
for example, I travel a lot for work. She doesn't
travel that much. So when I travel for where she
stays at home. They might go to the movies, but
they don't do nothing.
Speaker 3 (31:37):
Crazy.
Speaker 4 (31:37):
I remember one time, this must have been like ten
years ago, because I've learned. It took a long time.
I learned eighteen years ago. She went out of town
for something. I immediately took the boys to Vegas father
son trip, Mando lay Bay just had a great weekend.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
And she's like, why would you? We could have did
that on any weekend.
Speaker 4 (31:56):
Yes, And in my head, I'm not. I wasn't on purpose,
like excluding her. I was just doing things that I
thought I wish my dad had did for me. Got
our kids a PlayStation. My son's a PlayStation, terrible calf
with a good heart. We agree to get to a PlayStation.
We go give it to them together. She's getting her
(32:19):
hair done. I can't wait, I said, surprised. Send her
the video. I don't see no laughing emojis, no heart.
Why would you do that before I got home? Because
my real dad wasn't in my life. I didn't even know.
It took me going to therapy to realize. And here's
the other part.
Speaker 3 (32:40):
It's dangerous.
Speaker 4 (32:41):
If you don't think you're doing bad, you're not aware
of what it looks like to other people. Unchecked, you
can do. You can do hurt and harm with good intentions.
I just want to be a good father. But I realized, oh,
I'm I'm stealing moments from you to make sure I
have them. And my therapist, I remember, she was good.
I had a personal therapist, and we had a couple therapists,
(33:03):
and she was like, there's nothing wrong with what you're doing,
but if you're not doing it, if you don't even
know why you're doing it, you're trying to you're trying
to heal yourself, and your kids appreciate that, but you're
doing at the expense of your wife. And I was like,
oh snap. But luckily for me, I was able to
stop that. You know, ten twelve years and two, and
it wasn't all the time. That was just like a
little period. It's like a little period. First ten years
(33:25):
we were broke, ain't no joy. We're doing everything together
because it's all free. Park picnic, zoo, museum, fairy we
were on a boat, y'all. Yes, because it was free.
We went to Canada, y'all, and we came right back.
You don't know that there was a day trip. We
took the pictures like it was a lot. We came
right back home. But there was a little period. We're
(33:46):
doing a little bit so I could do things, and
in that three to five year period, I did maybe
five ten things like that, and in my mind, I'm like,
I'm doing a good job. And Melissa had to tell me, like, yo,
you're like robbing me of these men. It's unfair. And
I'm like, ego wise, I'm like nigga great father. She
(34:07):
was like, yeah, but I want to be a great mother.
And more importantly, I would not do that to you,
and I have not done that to you, and I
actually have way more opportunities to do to do that
because you're gone, but I don't do you like that.
Speaker 3 (34:18):
And I was like, dang.
Speaker 4 (34:19):
So I say all that to say, like, it's so
important to be open to hearing from people, because I
could have went online and you know, my wife tripping
about this man, women could anybody, and I would have
got the and so I was looking for but it
wasn't the truth, because the truth is she was right
(34:41):
and I was wrong even trying to be right.
Speaker 1 (34:43):
Yeah. I love that.
Speaker 2 (34:45):
I love that, and I love you and Melissa, she
was supposed to come today.
Speaker 3 (34:51):
Melissa, you know what, this is part of the thing.
Speaker 4 (34:57):
She takes the the weight of safety and comfortability so
that I can do this because the boys, although nineteen
and seventeen, they want a parent around a lot. Remember
(35:19):
early touring, Melissa used tour with me and we had
like a babysitter and she would keep them for the weekend,
did this for full year. The second year, my youngest
was like, we had to go to therapy with him
because it was like affecting him.
Speaker 3 (35:31):
And he was like, can at least one of you
guys be home?
Speaker 4 (35:34):
And Melissa was like, I'm out, I am done. I
can do this to this. So that's why I would
say it's our dream because she is taking the weight
of missing out on things like this because she wanted
to come. But you know, it's my son's senior year.
He got soccer and driving and all that type of stuff.
And also she just wants to be able to cook
(35:54):
meals so they're not ordering out even though we have
access to those things. She wants to make sure they have,
like because they'll be like when coming home for the time,
y'all be gone, you know what I'm saying. Like they
love her real nick, you know what I'm saying. Even
though my oldiest want to know for us to be home,
for him to be out till three, four, five in
the morning, but he wants us to.
Speaker 1 (36:11):
Be Oh, Christy, I remember you talking about that.
Speaker 4 (36:13):
Oh never nothing. We go to the family dinner, get
home ten thirty. He's all right, see y'all later, what
are you doing to stay home?
Speaker 3 (36:21):
Love us?
Speaker 4 (36:23):
But she takes those moments so that I can do
this for myself, for us, and so the boys have
some semblance of tradition.
Speaker 3 (36:33):
You know.
Speaker 4 (36:34):
She doesn't do it all the time, but she does
it a lot of the times. So we're slowly easing
out of that as they are both be in college
this fall, and even though they'll be at home, it's like, okay, now, now,
hey you eighteen and twenty.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
Yes, mama, I got to have a life.
Speaker 4 (36:53):
I got to go down to keep it positive because
I'm gonna be her armor bear when she comes down here.
But I love I love traveling with her, and she
comes a lot. But she also had and sometimes it's
just like she has her own podcasts, she has her
own things to shoot. That's something else I had to learn, Crystal. Yeah,
come on key, I wanted to kept a woman. I
did not realize it because I didn't have enough money
(37:15):
to keep her early.
Speaker 3 (37:16):
She made more than me. I was kept, so I
kept care.
Speaker 4 (37:21):
I did not realize internally I always wanted to kept
a woman. Yeah, but I did not marry a kept woman.
I married a girl who was ambitious, independent, had her
own money, had her own job always, and I love
those qualities.
Speaker 3 (37:33):
But low key.
Speaker 4 (37:33):
I always when I started getting little bread, I'm like,
why you ain't got to work? What she had the
big cab have that little little aerospace job, Like, I
ain't got it.
Speaker 3 (37:43):
You do what's going to work?
Speaker 4 (37:45):
She liked her job, she was good at her job,
She had work friends, She enjoyed her own things, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (37:52):
She had those things.
Speaker 4 (37:54):
And I remember when she started her podcast way back
with her Homegirl.
Speaker 3 (37:57):
I remember coming home off.
Speaker 4 (37:58):
The road, want her to be at the door pod
roast because I'm a man and I'm went and sold
out these three shows. I want steak and potatoes on
the table when I get home.
Speaker 3 (38:11):
I came home.
Speaker 4 (38:11):
This girl ain't ain't no fool. I don't spell nothing
but but but recording equipment Henson. She in the back
room shooting her podcast. I said, I want potatoes, and.
Speaker 3 (38:27):
Your life is your life. My life is my life.
And then there's our life.
Speaker 4 (38:33):
I can't dominate your life and make you do everything
that I want to do, because then you have no life,
and it's unfair to impress my hopes.
Speaker 3 (38:42):
Dreams for you. I have to work within what you
want for your own life because you you've you've.
Speaker 4 (38:48):
We've committed ourselves to each other, but not our entire
everything like you you know, I don't. And and and
resentment is one of the key tendants to divorce. Yes,
like and resentment is small, It's in the back, and
it gnaws on you.
Speaker 3 (39:04):
It's like an erosion thing.
Speaker 4 (39:06):
It's like he gets to do his thing. I can't
do my thing. I'm always with the kids. You hearing
them Michelle Obama, Like you always get little things like
you go to gym whenever you want, you know, things
like that. So I had to realize I'm trying to
craft her into the perfect woman for me and not
allowing her to be the woman who lives her own life.
And that means sometimes she's not going to come with me.
(39:27):
Sometimes she won't be at my show. I was holding
her to a low ki crystal, and I'm talking a lot.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
I love it.
Speaker 3 (39:32):
Therapy made me realize I was.
Speaker 4 (39:35):
Trying to replace my childhood where my parents weren't there
with my wife in my adult life. Yes, I want
because Loki, my Melissa as my girlfriend, went to more
basketball games in my high school last two years than
anybody in my family. My parents were at work or
they just didn't come, you know, my brother's sister.
Speaker 3 (39:55):
At school doing their own thing. But Melissa was in there.
Speaker 4 (39:57):
Yeah, so I look into the crowd, I'm seeing her
and it stands. So now I want you to be
at every show. And she was like I heard these jokes,
like She's like, I don't want to always like I
got stuff to do, you know what I'm saying. So
I had to again in therapy I found out I said,
(40:19):
I'm putting an unfair wait on you to.
Speaker 3 (40:21):
Be my mom and dad and my real dad.
Speaker 4 (40:23):
You a fully realize adult who has her own idea
of what that day should look like. So that sometimes
means that she's not there. So I appreciate her more
when she is there, and and sometimes she has her
own thing and I support her, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (40:38):
She gets booked to speak or whatever, I'll come out
to her her social media. I'm her armor bearer. But
I can't be. I can't.
Speaker 4 (40:44):
I can't require that for her, for me, for everything
right and have her be happy.
Speaker 1 (40:49):
Yes, exactly that.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
I love that, and I love that you all were
able to communicate, even from parenting to relationship with what
you need as individuals.
Speaker 1 (40:58):
That is so important.
Speaker 4 (41:00):
Yeah, twenty two years married, it'll be twenty two years
in Jane.
Speaker 3 (41:05):
Yeah, twenty seven years told? Is that correct? Yeah? We
started doing no twenty six years told. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (41:11):
Wow.
Speaker 4 (41:12):
And in that time she's changed, and I've changed every
two or three years.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
Let's talk about evolution, like, oh my god, because people
thinking who are you now?
Speaker 1 (41:24):
Like you're gonna continue to evolve?
Speaker 3 (41:26):
Think about it like who you were at sixteen? What
you knew, what you thought you? Yeah, right, that's where
we started.
Speaker 4 (41:34):
We didn't even know what we didn't know, ain't paid
a bill, I know how to be on my own.
Speaker 3 (41:39):
Yeah, okay, right, sixteen?
Speaker 4 (41:42):
So at sixteen living in their parents' house, no car,
no job, full time job, no responsibilities, college Melissa, And
these are just the big ones.
Speaker 3 (41:54):
These are not the small things. I'm just talking about.
Speaker 4 (41:57):
When I first met her, she just finished puberty. Who
were three years prior I met her? At sixteen puberty
what twelve thirteen.
Speaker 3 (42:03):
Maybe up to fifteen sixteen?
Speaker 4 (42:04):
Yeah, still growing, not even as tall as she's supposed
to be. Sixteen eighteen, we're in college. We get married
after our junior year of college. Wow. So now this
is married Melissa, right, who is a church girl who
only knows purity culture and what her mom taught her
and what her pastors in first lead said, she hasn't
you know at that age, we haven't had our own thoughts.
(42:27):
These are just the thoughts that were impressed upon us.
Then there's out of college Melissa, but married right. I
was the first person she lived with that wasn't you
know related to she was virgin. We got married first
pen only pen amen, amen, shout out right. Now now
(42:48):
there's Melissa the mother, right, we get she gets pregnant.
We're twenty three the mother now, mind you, Melissa was
a very career oriented woman.
Speaker 3 (42:57):
I won't say that she didn't wantkids.
Speaker 4 (42:58):
Because it wasn't that, but yeah, her dreams were like
I want to go on Wall Street. I want to
wear pencil skirt, have a briefcase, Like I want to
be a lawyer, want to be a banker.
Speaker 3 (43:06):
So now she's a mother. So now she's realized, oh
d my desires are changing.
Speaker 4 (43:11):
Now I desire to be a mother, like it's important
for me to, you know, scrap book things like that.
Speaker 3 (43:17):
So zero kids, one kid's big change. One kid to
two kids, big change. Her parents got divorced.
Speaker 4 (43:23):
That had a tremendous impact on us, on her because
she idolized that relationship. So now if my parents got divorced,
well that means anybody can get divorced.
Speaker 3 (43:36):
R my parents, who were both saved in the church,
they got divorced.
Speaker 4 (43:42):
Yeah, easily, Kevin and I can get divorced.
Speaker 2 (43:47):
That wasn't a thought, right now that's the reality that
it could.
Speaker 3 (43:51):
Yes.
Speaker 4 (43:51):
Then there's Kevin, the husband who I had always had
a job, kept a job.
Speaker 3 (43:56):
That's one of the things she loved about me.
Speaker 4 (43:58):
Now Kevin wants to be something more or I don't
really know how to do that, so I end up
getting fired.
Speaker 3 (44:04):
So now wait, hold up, you fired?
Speaker 4 (44:06):
And then I'm telling her, low key, I kind of
want to do comedy for a living right from Tacoma.
That ain't even possible, right, like, and it really wasn't
to her credit, I believe.
Speaker 3 (44:18):
So now you got to stay at home husband. Yeah,
and with a huge ego that she was careful to manage.
Speaker 4 (44:25):
You know then I you know, I'm telling her I
want to move to La.
Speaker 3 (44:30):
Later.
Speaker 4 (44:31):
Then there's Melissa, the new family in LA with no bread.
We both worked at boring part of that when kids
were in private school. There was eight kids in my
son's school and iPads like we were killing it, both
making sixty grand a year to us. We over one
hundred grand as a household. Broke boy talking about these planes.
(44:51):
We with the plane.
Speaker 3 (44:52):
People, we out here with the plane. You feel me.
I gotta badge into my job. You just walking here.
He's a walker. I got a five.
Speaker 4 (45:03):
I got a bad Listen had government clearance at her job,
security clearance. So that was a vision fresh and La,
no money, married to a dreamer, and it ain't clicking
right now.
Speaker 3 (45:16):
I'm owe me twenty five dollars for acting.
Speaker 1 (45:19):
I need that run it.
Speaker 3 (45:21):
I need that twenty five. You said Friday, which is Friday.
I don't got no gas. Where's the twenty five?
Speaker 1 (45:28):
Which is why you pay people on time today?
Speaker 4 (45:30):
This is why I don't want nobody patting their pockets
for me.
Speaker 3 (45:35):
And here's the thing, I'm struggling because my company's growing.
Speaker 4 (45:37):
I always pay people on time because I was selling
them cash up and them my finance team business managers.
Speaker 3 (45:43):
Like stop, hey man, you can't do that.
Speaker 4 (45:46):
No, But the thing is they're they're growing and big
company running payroll. There's things out of my control. But
if they go on TikTok, they're not gonna say Kev's
finance team transpots a number. It's gonna be keV on stage.
Speaker 3 (46:01):
Pay me. But that parts now.
Speaker 1 (46:02):
Out of my control because you're a business.
Speaker 3 (46:04):
Because now I'm a business, and I don't I don't
want to get out of it. Yeah, you know.
Speaker 4 (46:08):
My exactess manager was like, it's not a if you
get out of it when it's when, yeah, and what
the penalty is going to be.
Speaker 3 (46:15):
So now I can't like my toes are like this
because this person's check is late.
Speaker 4 (46:18):
Because I remember twenty five, like I literally know. My
kids are like, where's wet? No pre seilings, and I'm
like that twenty five is supposed to be here today.
I was going to get there suons. I had, y'all,
but they didn't get me my twenty five, you know,
And it was never that bad, but it was closed,
like I need all my bread and still.
Speaker 3 (46:38):
Nothing can be leid. So there's keV at that point.
Speaker 4 (46:41):
Then there's keV at All Deaf, And then there's a
realization that when we started working together in this part
of the pandemic, she enjoyed her job. When I worked
at All Deaf and she worked at her aerospace company,
we could come home and.
Speaker 3 (46:53):
Talk about our days. Yes, when we work together, we're
having the same day.
Speaker 1 (46:57):
It's nothing to talk about.
Speaker 4 (46:59):
There's so now we're like, hey, why we ain't really
connect him because we've been in the house all day
and that's just you know, the pandemic exacerbates that to
the nth degree, Like okay, it's not even on the road. Yeah,
why is he going in this office and closing the
door and watching TV?
Speaker 3 (47:15):
And the boys are in their room watching TV. And
we didn't realize.
Speaker 4 (47:19):
And she used to go get her hair done and
get her nails done and stuff like that, and she realized, Oh,
that was my me time.
Speaker 3 (47:23):
Now we don't have that.
Speaker 4 (47:24):
Yeah, why do I feel weird that we're at home?
We don't feel like we're at home. So I say,
it's like I had a cell phone, you know, you
probably did for twenty years. Think about the cell phone
you had, your first Nokia properly yep, with the little snake,
And think about the iPhone you have probably right now.
Imagine if you went from that phone to the iPhone
with nothing in between. Wow, And that's what happens in marriage. Yeah,
(47:48):
you gotta every phone, every update, You gotta learn this
new and just iPhone enough headphone jack o, dang, I
ain't got that, and I gotta get air pods. Now
I gotta charge this now this thing used to not
be there, but from the Nokia Snake when.
Speaker 3 (47:59):
We used to out of dating to the iPhone seventeen.
Speaker 4 (48:02):
Yeah, if I wasn't up to date on every and
think about how little the changes feel at the.
Speaker 3 (48:06):
Time, it's just like, oh, dang, man, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (48:09):
I used to be we used to take pictures. They
used to be grainy, all that stuff. Now you can shoot.
There's a new app you can do a shot recorder.
Speaker 2 (48:17):
I just saw that black owed to man. I saw
that that didn't exist, yeah.
Speaker 3 (48:22):
Two weeks ago. Right.
Speaker 4 (48:23):
So that's what I use as an example, is like
being married is like being up to date on your
cell phone at all. Reading the terms of conditions learning
how to use it at all times. You can't skip
two or three phones. You definitely can't skip five or
ten years. And a lot of times I think what
happens to people don't realize they haven't been paying attention.
And that's how I think. You look at a person
you recognize. I recognize the cell phone, but I actually
(48:46):
don't know how to use it. Yeah, it's like, this
is not an Android disc But but one time I
did a gig and they gave me a free Android
like a phone to use, and I couldn't. It's not
that I couldn't use it, but it just felt so
foreign because I haven't had an Android in years, and
I was like, wow, this feels really uncomfortable. But this
(49:08):
feels like a phone. I know what a phone looks like,
but I can't.
Speaker 3 (49:11):
How do you call it? How do you text?
Speaker 4 (49:13):
I said, I can't do that, and I imagine Android
iPhone the same thing. I'm not dissing, y'all. I don't
dis no more because my Android app uses and they
don't play listen. But I feel like that's what happens
in a relationship. It just feels starts to feel foreign
even though it looks familiar.
Speaker 3 (49:29):
Yeah, oh I killed that.
Speaker 1 (49:30):
You did, y'all give it?
Speaker 3 (49:32):
Clip it.
Speaker 1 (49:33):
That was so good. That's a whole teaser right there.
Speaker 4 (49:36):
But I think people say marriage is work. They think
it means like hard. I hate It's not that. It's
just like it's like gardening. Yes, you got to go
out there until it and water it, protect it from
the sun. You gotta nurture it. And that's the work.
It's not. It's not like breaking rocks. But it's also
you can't leave a garden unattended for weeks and months
(49:57):
and expected.
Speaker 3 (49:57):
To bear good fruit. You have to pay it.
Speaker 4 (49:59):
Good gardeners are out there every day, pulling bugs off,
whatever it takes to make sure this is always bearing
good fruit. And that marriage is like a continual garden.
It's like working out and eating right.
Speaker 3 (50:11):
You can't.
Speaker 4 (50:12):
If you stop working out and eating right, the work
also stops. You start getting back. It's the same thing.
Speaker 3 (50:19):
But I enjoy the fruit of this work, so.
Speaker 4 (50:23):
I don't mind doing it because although it's hard and
you know, you know, tough, the benefits are amazing.
Speaker 3 (50:31):
I can't imagine.
Speaker 4 (50:33):
I can't imagine trying to date right now, but what
I see from people.
Speaker 3 (50:37):
It looks like the Thriller music video. That's what y'all.
The way y'all talk you talk about. I mean, it
seems scary out there.
Speaker 4 (50:46):
I don't it's like zombie apocalypse, Like I don't want
to be out there with y'all.
Speaker 3 (50:52):
I like my house, you're.
Speaker 1 (50:57):
Gonna be running back.
Speaker 3 (51:00):
I'm sorry, I'm coming on.
Speaker 1 (51:05):
This has been amazing. Seriously, we gotta do this more often.
Speaker 4 (51:09):
Melissa this Yeah, Melissa for sure wants to come back.
We'll be back in Atlanta two or three times in
this month. Okay, so to have her next time, we can,
but thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (51:21):
Absolutely.
Speaker 4 (51:22):
Also, let me give you your flowers while we're here.
You are so talented as a as a person. You
read that Bible on your Instagram stories. You either really
read it or you spend so much time thinking you
might as.
Speaker 3 (51:33):
Well have read read you. You're so photogenic and fashion forward.
Speaker 4 (51:40):
I'd be like your pos is being listen look, and
she'd be like that, Crystal Rene done it again.
Speaker 3 (51:45):
She went down to Paris and she did it again.
Speaker 4 (51:47):
But more importantly, your personality and your spirit is as
warm as you come across on screen in person, just
like you said about me, it's true about you. Sometimes
that is a facade. Sometimes the actor is is acting
all the other time and Christal Renee is the character.
Speaker 3 (52:06):
But you have the same character from the moment I.
Speaker 4 (52:08):
Met you at t s U to BT when you
thought I said you was eating ham, I.
Speaker 1 (52:13):
Said, you said, I said Lamb. I said, yeah, the
precious Lamb.
Speaker 3 (52:24):
But I love the community you built.
Speaker 4 (52:26):
I love this this uh, this this podcast, and I
know that there's this. You created a space for women
who need it, people who need it, and your team
has been amazing as well. Everybody was very kind, and
it's it's You're just great.
Speaker 3 (52:39):
Thank you, thank you.
Speaker 1 (52:42):
That means a lot coming from you.
Speaker 3 (52:43):
Thank you, thank you.
Speaker 2 (52:44):
Before we leave, is there anything that our community can
support you on.
Speaker 3 (52:48):
Yes, that we got coming up.
Speaker 4 (52:51):
There's no dates yet, but just follow me kem on stage.
Everything I can talk about or I want to tell
you about, just follow me out.
Speaker 3 (52:59):
I'll talk about it. Greef Sucks.
Speaker 4 (53:01):
Larger tour coming this summer into the fall. Watch me
on to B. I've got some stuff on to B
that's out and some more will be coming out soon.
I don't know the day, so I don't want to
you know, just follow me, yes, Kep on stage. If
you follow me, you'll you'll I'll be able to tell you.
Speaker 2 (53:19):
Okay, awesome, thank you so much before we get out
of here. Are thinking for this season, we're leaning more
into being unapologetic. So I want to know what is
keV being unapologetic about in this season of his life.
Speaker 3 (53:30):
Oh, that's a great question.
Speaker 4 (53:35):
I am being unapologetically mean, and I think that means
I am finally accepting that you might not like me
or what I say. And I'm okay with that because
earlier in my life and earlier my content career career,
I was I was trying to make every single person
happy and that was not.
Speaker 3 (53:59):
Entertainable thing.
Speaker 4 (54:01):
So now I am realizing to be myself, I have
to accept that some people won't like that, and they'll
vocalize that, and they'll thread about it and tweet about
it and TikTok about it. And also, like, at my
level of awareness, it's advantageous for people to talk about
me negatively because your video or your thread or tweet
(54:24):
or podcasts it will often do well. I don't like that.
I really hate that, but there's nothing I can do
about that. And I certainly won't try to appease millions
of people because that have millions of followers who actually
like me, multiple millions of people who don't follow me
and may not like me, So I can't control all
(54:46):
those variable I think it comes from a control. And
as a comedian, if you have a thousand people laughing
but to not laughing, you focus on those two.
Speaker 3 (54:53):
You perform live, you want to hit everybody. Yes I'm
killing right.
Speaker 4 (54:59):
Now, and you just can't do that, and you'll be
racking your brain trying to. So I be having to
be quiet, and you know, meaningless. Have realized the other
week this phrase that we came up with, like not
saying anything is not the same as having nothing to say.
Speaker 3 (55:16):
I often choose not to say.
Speaker 1 (55:18):
That's good.
Speaker 4 (55:19):
Sometimes I just don't say anything because I know if
I address a thing, it's just gonna magnify it.
Speaker 1 (55:24):
Can't give everything energy.
Speaker 4 (55:25):
Don't mean it, don't mean I aven't seeing it, don't
mean I don't have thoughts. But my thoughts are for
my family and friends and maybe sometimes even my actual
audience who cares. But I'm also not gonna give negativity
what they want, which is more visibility. You're gonna die
on that vine. I'm not gonna tell that guarded. Yes,
you're gonna have to You're gonna have to keep the
hate training. I ain't gonna help you talk about me,
(55:49):
absolutely not.
Speaker 3 (55:51):
Thank you very much so much.
Speaker 2 (55:57):
You know what says with me from this conversation is
a reminder that growth doesn't always look like clarity. Sometimes
it looks like showing up honestly, even while you're still processing. Kevin,
want to thank you for your honesty, your perspective, and
willingness to hold both humor and heaviness at the same time,
because sometimes healing isn't about having the right words, It's
(56:19):
about being present.
Speaker 1 (56:20):
Being real, and align yourself to keep going. Thank you
so much for tuning in. Be sure to subscribe, share this.
Speaker 2 (56:27):
Episode with someone who needs it, and if you ever
need advice, positivity, or want to share what you're going through,
email us at Keep it Positive Outcomes at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1 (56:36):
It's always stay blessed, stay encouraged, and keep you positive.
Speaker 2 (56:40):
Dy.
Speaker 1 (56:40):
I'll see you guys next time.
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