Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
H m hm, Hot Happy Mess, Celebrate your magic in
the middle of life's messes. Hot Happy Mess. I'm Serial
Hall and this is hot Happy made cute. Hello, Hello,
(00:25):
what is up? Welcome to a new episode of Hot
Happy Mess. I am your host, Zuri Hall. Happy New Year.
How are we doing? Three? So far, so good? I
like it here. It has not been without its um
ups and downs already and we're only a few weeks in.
(00:47):
But um, it's been a nice start to the year
for me. I'm hoping the same for you this past
holiday season. Yeah, like, let's do a quick life upsate.
I think that that might be a good idea. Since
it's been a hot little minute since um I was
able to give you an update in this way. But
I am excited about today's episode. It's a solo episode.
(01:11):
I am talking all things soft life, all things divine, feminine, UM,
something that I'm really exploring and taking more seriously and
pretty excited about just you know, ways to apply that
more in my own life. I've kind of slowly but
surely been on that journey for um, maybe a year ish,
(01:35):
but particularly in um these last few months here. Uh,
So I'm excited to share more about that with you. UM,
But first let's do a little bit of housekeeping, a
little bit of life updating, shall we. Um. At the
end of this episode, I'm actually going to do it giveaway.
(01:55):
I'm choosing five lucky winners. It's super super easy eat
to win. UM. It takes five seconds, So listen until
the end to find out what you can win and
how easy it is to enter. Spoiler alert. Literally you
just have to leave a review. UM, but you gotta
wait till the end to find out, you know, the
(02:16):
nitty gritty, which is basically just what you're gonna win. Okay, Zuri,
that was an awful, awful pitch awful cell on a giveaway,
but five people are gonna walk away with it, so
stay tuned. UM, So quick life update. UM. I have
been laying on the self care thick. Like I said,
(02:36):
it was a sort of like came out of the
gate swinging, um start to the new year. And you know,
I'm reflecting a bit on this time last year where
was I um mentally, emotionally, professionally, physically. And there are
some things that have stayed more the same than I
(02:57):
would care to admit. And there are certain things that
are just so different and so radically changed. UM. And
I would say the thing that's most changed, UM is me,
and not in um, not in some extreme way, but
I feel the work that I've been doing on myself
(03:20):
and my self development UM, spiritually, intellectually when it comes
to emotional intelligence, and just kind of how I want
to show up in my relationships and my friendships and
for myself. Most importantly, I feel that the seeds that
I was planting even a year ago. You know, I
told you guys about my really incredible uh solo retreat
(03:40):
over New Year's Eve to Golden Door in southern California,
UM for a week with a bunch of women who
were total strangers at the beginning of the week and
you know, friends and acquaintances by the end of the week. UM.
But some seeds were planted there. And I'm grateful to
look back on the last year and realize that even
(04:02):
when sometimes I felt like I was just so off
course or I was not showing up for myself or
doing the things that I promised myself I was gonna do. UM,
last New Year's Eve, I'm like, wait, hold on, I
think I am I think I need to give myself
more credit because the piece I feel in certain storms,
the way that I'm able to show up and navigate
(04:23):
choppy waters, um the way that I am standing in
my nose and holding onto my boundaries even when people
I love try to challenge them or push them or
step over them, even if it's unintentionally like that all
feels just a little bit more true, and I feel
(04:45):
a little more grounded, and all of that more way
more grounded. Actually, So the progress is there. And I
shared that with you just to say that I hope
that whatever it is you're going through, whatever it is
you may be promised yourself, whatever goals you've set for yourself,
I really hope you'll take it easy on yourself and
trust the process, trust divine timing, and trust yourself. Trust
(05:09):
that you're doing the best you can in any given
moment with what you've got to work with. And sometimes
the best you can do is just go to sleep,
wake up tomorrow and try again. And if that's the
only thing that you accomplished in a twenty four hour
span of time, well then hats off to you. My
doorbell just beat. That's one of the things about shout
(05:31):
out to vivent my security uh system. But it's one
of the things about the security systems where someone can
so much as a walk by my house on a stroll,
a casual stroll with her dog, and then my house
is like and I'm like, those people want nothing to
do with me. I think we can all stand down. Um.
(05:52):
I know there's a way to change that setting, but
I haven't yet. I just preferred to be on high alert,
not unlike my puppy and time somebody walks by the house.
So anyways, um, back to the subject at hand. I
hope that the new year finds you well. I hope
you're being gentle with yourself. I'm sending you love, lots
and lots of love. And today we're getting into the
(06:12):
self love of it all, the soft girl era, the
soft life era, because y'all, I am headed in that direction.
I've been slowly on that journey for years now, and
I'm really embracing it. It's been cool to, you know,
witness this sort of lifestyle trend take off. Um over
the last year or two. We've seen a lot of
(06:33):
that on TikTok and whether it's the that girl aesthetic
and that girl vibe or you know, the soft life energy,
the soft life hashtag. UM. It's trending for a reason.
I think so many of us are burnt out right,
or have been burnt out, or have been conditioned to
believe that we have to just be hard and strong
(06:55):
and tough all the time. And the more we are
self sacrificial, and the more we give, give, give of ourselves,
the more of a martyr we are, The more worthy
we are of applause, the more worthy we are. Period.
So I love UM a mindset. I love a lifestyle
that says I am worthy. Period. I can't hustle my
(07:17):
way into more worth. I can't grind my way into
more worth. I can't die to self. Um let lovers
or friends or family or colleagues or anyone disrespect me
or put a weight on me that's heavier than I
can bear. To be worthy, I am worthy? And so
(07:38):
how do I create a life that is softer, that
is gentler, that is kinder too, and for and on myself?
Not that order of the words. But you know what
I mean, because I deserve it, And by I I
mean you, I mean we UM. We deserve the soft
and kind and gentle things in life. And this is
(08:01):
your friendly reminder that you can give that to yourself.
You don't need to wait for someone else to do it.
You can be in a whole relationship, you could be
in a whole marriage, you could have a bunch of
kids you love. Not a single one of those people
has to be the person to show up and give
you that um for you to feel it. That's absolutely
(08:21):
something that's within your power and within your control to
show up for yourself and love on yourself the way
that you want from the people in your life, and
hopefully they give it to you too. Hopefully they give
it to us too, but we can certainly give it
to ourselves. So that's what this episode is all about.
What is the soft life? What does it mean to
be stepping into your soft life? Era um? Divine feminine,
(08:46):
the divine feminine? What is that? You know? It's definitely
like a trendy buzzword or buzz phrase. We hear a
lot about high value women, high value men, Like what
is all of this stuff? I've got a lot of
thoughts on all of that and some ideas around the
high value man and woman of it all. Well, I
guess kind of maybe technically believe in the concept. I
(09:09):
think it's been weaponized and used to, you know, perpetuate
a lot of misogyny quite frankly in certain conversations online,
particularly when it comes to what makes a high value
woman quote unquote um. But then there's also this other
version of it, one that I think has really good intentions,
(09:31):
and it's something that a lot of us could probably
get behind. You know. I like to think that we
all are innately of value and can tap into what
makes us quote unquote high value. But that's not a
conversation I'm as interested in having as I am the
conversations around creating or entering your soft life era, because
(09:54):
that is something that is completely for and by you.
So that's what we're gonna talk about today. Cool really quickly,
I actually have a brand new free bat to give
away to you. It's a thirty day calendar that I
created with affirmations to manifest a soft life. It is
(10:18):
thirty days of affirmations. It's a free download. All you
have to do is go to the soft Life Dot
Guide t H E s O F t L I
F E dot g U I D E. Yeah. I
was surprised to like what there's a dot guide now,
not just dot com, but there is. So go to
(10:38):
the Soft Life dot Guide and you can download the
calendar thirty Days of Affirmation, so that every day you
can wake up and give a new affirmation to help
you call in the life you want. And if that
includes some of the things that you here in this episode,
then that's definitely a free bu want. Okay, okay, quick
(11:00):
update life. Um, this past weekend, I laid on the
self care. You know, a year ago, I was talking
about self abandonment and sacrificing oneself sort of like in
a murdery way. That's not a word, but whatever. And
so I've just always been way more intentional since then
of you know, checking in with myself when I feel
(11:22):
like I'm on the listening to my body when it's
burnt out, being lazy for an entire day or afternoon
or weekend, if that's what my body is telling me,
even if I'm like, oh I could have caught up
on emails, or oh I could have done that outside project,
or oh I could have filmed or shot content for
some social media platform that I really probably don't feel
like being on right now. Um, Instead of forcing myself
(11:44):
to do that. I've done what my body and my
mind is saying, and recently that's been rest because I've
been doing a lot of really cool stuff. But the
other side of that coin is I need to recharge.
So what did my lazy weekend? Like? Uh? Like I
said a lot of unapologetic, arresting and quote unquote laziness.
(12:04):
I started a new work book. It's called How to
Do the Work by Nicole Appea. Dr Nicole Apera. She's
an incredible licensed therapist UM super popular on Instagram. I
want to say her insta, which a lot of you
have probably heard of, is the Holistic Psychologist. Yep, that's her,
(12:25):
The Holistic Psychologist on Instagram. She has like six million followers.
She's a psychologist and she teaches you basically how to
heal and consciously create a new version of yourself. And
just her post a loan, you know they hit this spot.
I've got her profile up now and every day like constantly,
I'm like ding ing ding ding ding, blowing up my
(12:46):
friends and family, sending her posts in the d M
s like this is one UM that I recently saw.
What's one that I liked? Them all? Okay, so this
is when I actually just reposted on my insta story.
She said. If we say what we want will be
called aggressive. If we people please or appease, will be
called selfish because it's never enough. If we choose to
(13:08):
break the cycle, there will be people who label us
as the problem. If we stay in dysfunction, the love
we receive will come with conditions. If we outgrow relationships,
some people will feel abandoned in the process. If we
stay in relationships we've outgrown, new versions of ourselves won't
be accepted. If we follow a path that's not traditional,
(13:29):
will be told it's too risky or won't work out.
If we do what's expected of us, there will still
be people who critique how we do it. If we
place the boundary, people won't honor them or will violate them.
If we have no boundaries, will drown trying to meet
everyone's expectations. If we have the courage to share our
gifts with the world, there will be people who prefer
(13:49):
we stay silent. If we stay in our comfort zone,
we live within the regret of what if I would have.
The only answer really is to live a life that's
authentic to us and allow people to misunderstand us in
the process because they will anyway. Like wow, sometime says um,
amen to that. Uh. A lot of the work that
(14:12):
I've done over the last year is tapping into what
my core values are and a couple of my top ones.
A few of my top ones. The top one is freedom,
like I'm gonna live and let live. Person, don't come
over here trying to control me or my life or
my way of being or existing, and I will not
do it to you. Um. And so I seek freedom
and all things. And that's not to say I don't
(14:33):
believe in commitment, obligation, responsibility, but it has to be
a space in which I feel free to be myself
and my true self and freedom to allow my other
core values to be present. Those include integrity, UM, everything
that I'm saying, thinking, doing, um, being in alignment so
(14:54):
that I can show up as my full self in
any space and not have to code switch, not have
to lie to myself, not have to dim my light
or turn something down or turn another thing up. And
there's one thing to just ebb influence spaces. But I
mean changing or muting um something core about who I
am to exist in a space means it's just not
a space that I have any interest in being in. UM.
(15:15):
And then loyalty and service. I'll spare you the details
as to why, but those are my big ones, UM.
And so I really love her stuff because it helps
me remember, UM. You know that I am a woman
of integrity. I know who I am, And even when
people test that or push that, UM or question it.
(15:38):
Even that's the beauty of knowing yourself and knowing your
worth and doing that work is it doesn't matter what
you feel about me, or what you think about me,
or what you misunderstand about me, because I know my truth,
I know my heart, I know the intention behind my actions, UM.
And the best I can do is that the best
of my ability and communicate the intentions and try to
(16:01):
be better in the moments when I get it wrong.
So anybody and anything in any space they can't get
down with that is not a thing they don't want
to get down with. Moving on, UM, What else did
I do? I cook some pasta, did a little. I
can't pronounce it all. Lama treat cianna. It's it's usually
buccottini a lama treat cianna. I think, don't sue me
(16:22):
if I got that totally butchered with the pronunciation. But
y'all know I love Italian and I love my pasta
and all my partmersan um and it's like a red
sauce with spicy's got black pepper, dried chilies, and then
another thing I always mispronounced guanci. It's like it's Italian
salt cured pork jowl, like pork cheek or something like that. UM.
(16:45):
And I made some of that and it was really good,
but I swapped out the bucatini or the penne UM.
I co hosted the Golden Globes official pre show for
NBC UM with one of my friends and former colleagues,
Justin Sylvester, who was the best. UM. He's now one
of the new hosts of the new version of the
News and I'm over at Access Hollywood obviously and UM
(17:07):
and I also was a part of Miss Universe in
New Orleans for the first time ever. I hosted Miss
USA these last two years, and that's been so special
and incredible and so wild that you know, I went
down to New Orleans, had so much fun. I got
my bignet's, We listened to live jazz. We drank hurricanes
in the street. Actually, we spent more time looking for
(17:29):
hurricanes and drinking the ministry and I think we only
found one in the end. Um. No, no, no, we
drank hurricanes. We couldn't find grenades, that's what we were
looking for. Um. Yeah, I don't even know if we
have one, but we definitely got our hurricanes. Um. And
it was just a really good time. I was one
of the backstage commentators alongside a former Miss Universe, Catriona
(17:50):
gray Um, who was Miss Philippines and then Miss Universe.
She is just the kindest, sweetest soul and so talented,
so professional. We had a really great time giving commentary
um on you know, like three hours of live television.
It's streamed on Roku, and it was so cool. The
fans are awesome. The Miss Universe community is really just
(18:14):
so loyal and so down to ride, particularly for you know,
their various misses around the world. So I had a
great time. Um. But after Globes and New Orleans, your
girl was tired. So I spent the last weekend sleeping
and eating and drinking all the wine. Okay, um and
what else? What else? Really? Quickly? What am I reading. Okay,
(18:37):
So I recently read a book, well not recently, I
finished this quite some many months ago. But it's called
Wanting by Luke Burgess. I think I mentioned it on
the podcast. It's about mametic desire and how you know,
groupthink and bandwagon thinking can really affect us now more
than ever in the social media age, and ways to
break the cycle so that we as individuals can figure
(18:57):
out what we actually want, who we actually want to be,
how we actually want to show up in the world,
without the influence which a lot of times we're not
even aware of of mametic desire. So it's a really
good book. It's called Wanting. Check it out. And I
am just about to start awaken your inner goddess practical
(19:17):
tools for self care, emotional healing, and self realization. Like
I said, I'm tapping into the soft life of it all.
We are awaking and channeling the divine feminine. I'm excited.
So I figured, I, you know, pick up that book,
try some of the tools in there, and see if
I like it. So what is the soft life? I'm
(19:38):
glad you asked um. A soft life is one that
is relaxed and fulfilling. It involves making choices that allow
for an easier and a smoother path. And this is
like my life's motto at this point, and it's really
what the journey of Hot Happy Mess has been about.
It's about embracing flow over force, right, Like, so many
(20:00):
people believe they have to endure suffering in order to
be worthy. I talked about this a little bit earlier,
but suffering is really a form of resistance. You know,
you're you're pushing against something instead of going with the flow. Um.
Surrender is so beautiful sometimes, even when it's bitter sweet
or poignant, or it feels like you're giving up, because
(20:22):
it takes a lot of strength and grace to surrender
to what is, particularly when it's not what we want
or what we expected. Um. And that's something that I'm
always learning to do with more grace. UM. So anyways,
suffering is a form of resistance. You know, Hustle culture
especially glorifies overworking, constantly striving, and that is in a
(20:45):
way also a form of resistance. Constantly trying to get
to a place that you're not constantly trying to change
your circumstances so that they're presumably better than they currently are.
So the soft life lifestyle involves being intent, general and
mindful and your daily habits and routines and recognizing your
own worth, taking care of yourself, listening to your own
(21:07):
needs and desires, and being open to change and flexibility
in your journey. While luxury maybe a part of this,
it's not the main focus. Instead, the emphasis is on
self care and finding a holistic lifestyle of balance that
works for you. So has how Happy Mess low Key
just been helping us get into our soft life era
(21:29):
ever since we debut, since we premiered almost what is
it two years ago, which is wild to believe, I'd
like to think so, But in all seriousness, yeah, I've
been about that, do more with less life. I am
wanting efficiency, I am wanting ease flow over force. And
also I'm at a point where if it's not a hell, yes,
(21:52):
it's a though, Like I don't need to just spread
myself then or just show up for things because I can.
My energy is worthy of being and protected, and I
don't who cares if I have seven hours free in
a day, if I don't want to go to the
place or do the thing or be with the person,
it is perfectly reasonable to be like, yeah, No, I'm busy,
busy being on my couch by myself in my piece
(22:15):
where I want to be tell me you're an extroverted
introvert without telling me you are one. In today's episode,
I'm also doing another round of ask Zuri. So you all,
um submitted questions. Uh, just last month, I didn't ask
me anything on my Instagram story, so follow me there
(22:37):
and on TikTok at Zuri Hall on Instagram at Hazory
Hall on TikTok, and you guys admitted a bunch of
questions for me to answer. And there's a lot going
on in the world and in my life, so I
am going to answer some of those questions. So state
and you guys also wanted some advice, so from love
and dating to career advice to some personal questions that
(22:58):
you all had for me. Um, we're going there, We're
going to talk about it, So stay tuned until the infrastasary.
I think another really interesting component of the soft life
era or the soft life is um something that's traditionally
been very difficult for me to do, and I think
(23:19):
a lot of women can relate, and that is receiving
and as I you know, talk with you and a
little bit about sort of the divine feminine and what
that represents. The ability to receive UM is so much
a part of that of what the divine feminine includes UM,
and that's something that I've always had a tough time with. Right.
(23:41):
I'm a giver for sure, Like angiogram talking angiograms, I'm
a three wing two, which is type three first being
super ambitious, go getter, etcetera. But my wing is a two,
which is the sort of on the nose giver or
like very generous person. But it can be sometimes hard
for me to to receive UM. And that's a whole
(24:02):
different conversation as to why, and you know where that
may stem from or where I learned it from. But
it's it's hard, you know, UM. But I am learning
to not just slow down, but to also step back
and open up and allow the good things to come
into my life and for the good people in my
(24:23):
life to give to me and to show up. And
that's not UM, Like even materialistically speaking, it's allowing someone
to give the compliment and just saying thank you. It's
allowing someone to give those acts of service. Oh yeah,
I can help you, Oh I can fix that tire.
(24:45):
Oh yeah, I'd be happy to pick up such and
such for you. I'll be in your area, like allowing
um people to show up for you instead of being like,
oh no, it's fine, Oh no, I can do it.
Oh no, I got it. Yeah you can get it.
Yeah you can do it. But it doesn't mean you
have to trying to beat somebody to the door before
they can open it for me, Like what like, I've
(25:06):
almost gotten to the point this is really hard for me,
but of slowing down and blink blinking at that door
until it is opened, particularly if I am in the
company of a gentleman, because yeah, it's it sets the stage,
um to receive and to sort of send out the
bad signal that you are open to that. I think
(25:28):
a lot of guys, especially like they want to lead
in certain ways, um or they want to kind of
take on that masculine role in certain ways. But you know,
sometimes we're in our you know, ladies that can do
bad all by myself energy, which is true and sometimes
that is exactly what needs to be done bad on
by yourself. Um. But then they can also be intimidating.
(25:51):
You know, guys are humans too, they they have egos
and insecurities, and not to say we have to dance
and and to tiptoe arouse them, but they get in
there has just as much as we do about what
we're thinking, what we want, what we don't want. Am
I treating her like too much of a delicate flower? Like?
Do I need to prove to her that I respect
the strong woman in her? Um? Or? Am I treating
(26:11):
her like too much of a strong woman? Does she
want to be a damsel in distress right now? Does
she want me to to, you know, like lean into
my traditional quote unquote masculinity. Um So, I think they
get mixed signals as much as we get mixed signals,
and we're all just trying to figure it out together
in a perfect world. Um So, I'm learning to receive,
(26:32):
and I would encourage you to open up to the
same because you certainly do it, because you certainly deserve it.
I'm learning to take up space to not dim my
light for other people's comfort. One of my favorite poems
is at poem what We Say quotes, um but y'all
have heard it. Mary Anne Williamson, my papa um first
(26:54):
gave this to me in a frame years and years ago,
and he would always remind me of it. And it's
our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our
deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It
is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be? Brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually,
who are you not to be? You are a child
(27:17):
of God. You're playing small does not serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't
feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine,
as children do. We were born to make manifest the
glory of God that is within us. It's not just
in some of us, it's in everyone. And as we
let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people
(27:37):
permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our
own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. I love it, Okay,
so perfect segue into tapping into the divine feminine right
and that part of our light if that's something that
(27:58):
we're interested in having shine. And I'll be honest, I'm
newer to this idea of the divine feminine and what
exactly it means, how to tap into it? Like when
do I even want to embrace it? Like? What? What? What? What? What? What?
So we're learning about this together, um. But you know,
the divine feminine traditionally it's associated with fertility, with creativity,
(28:21):
with intuition. You know, it's it's soft energy, but it
can be fierce when necessary, loving and supportive. I was
reading an article on Bustle recently and they described it
as this um generally thought to be that the divine
feminine is generally thought to represent the part of our
consciousness that connects us to qualities like intuition, feeling, nurturing, receptivity,
(28:47):
and interconnectedness. And it's a type of energy that everyone
can access and tap into. It's not something tangible nor
a secret club that you need a membership to access.
Um And Gabriella Hairstick actually said, divine feminine refers to
a face of the divine spirit that is connected with
the body, with nature, and with cycles of creation and transformation.
(29:08):
So there's definitely a spiritual component, like a significant spiritual component. UM.
And the article continues that it's generally understood and felt
through the subtle intuitive wisdom of the body. You can
think of tapping into divine feminine energy as embracing your
inner goddess. I like that. I like the sound of that,
embracing my inner goddess. Uh. It continues. We live in
(29:32):
a patriarchal society, facts that often appears to value thinking
over intuition, taking action over being receptive, and focusing our
energy outward rather than inward. But sacred femininity allows us
to challenge that status quo. By embracing only certain parts
of ourselves, as dictated in part by our societal values,
(29:54):
we can create an imbalance, but embracing divine femininity can
help to heal that inequality. So um again, as this
is something new that I'm learning about and wrapping my
mind around, I'm really interested in tapping into that because
you know, even when I first made my Alpha bay
block all those years ago, it was me wanting to
(30:14):
lean into duality, right Alpha and Babe. I'd always been
told alf of this alpha, that you're like so alpha,
and sometimes it was good and then sometimes it was bad. Oh,
how are you going to keep a man? Oh? Relationships
like as if my leadership qualities, as if my strengths
would be a hindrance and romantic relationship and sometimes it has, honestly,
(30:34):
but I'll also say that it only has in the
wrong sorts of partnerships with the wrong sorts of people,
or you know, whether it's the first day to second
day and however many months of dating. Uh, but someone
who can't handle or a man who can't handle or
is intimidated by that. I do think there's something to
be said for again learning to lean into your your
(30:56):
femininity if that's something you desire, um. And allowing there
to be space for a man to step up in
that more traditionally masculine role, if that's something that you desire,
and that is something that I desire. To be clear, um,
I I'm not trying to go back to the before times,
(31:19):
but I do think there's something to be said for
yin and yang, for balance, for being equally yoked. Um.
And yeah, I want to feel feminine and soft and
delicate and taken care of and celebrated and you know,
just loved on in a way that allows me to
just drop my guard sort of like open up that shell,
(31:46):
not have to feel that I have to be so
hard and tough and just do do do it all
because I think a lot of us, uh ladies, we
feel a pressure to do that because we go out
into the outside world and we're dealing with these microaggressions,
these expectations. Um. We're in the workforce, we've got families,
and there's just so much on our shoulders. And over time,
(32:08):
you learn to cope and you just start to clinch
and clinch and tighten and tighten, and you have to
sort of harden in certain ways to survive, particularly in
corporate spaces um, and spaces that are traditionally dominated by men.
And you know, when it comes to our society, the
patriarchy has touched us about every corner of this thing. Um.
(32:29):
And so while there's a lot of undoing and I'm
learning that's happening, that's encouraging, there's still a lot of that.
And so we have to tap into or turn up
some of our masculine energies to exist and thrive in
those spaces and get their respects that we're worthy of
and deserve, whether or not we're coming with you know,
(32:49):
traditionally quote unquote masculine energy. Um. So all that to say,
I'm trying to tap in y'all it's a process on
learning some of the ways in which I've had to,
you know, be tougher, stiff, upper lit um. But that's
also served me well. You know, we get the job done.
Um And I take a lot of pride in that.
(33:10):
You know, I grew up with I have two brothers.
I'm a daddy's girl. I'm the oldest. Um So, I
was always like the scrappy, oldest sister who was the littlest,
like tiniest, like fifty pounds, soak and wet on a
good day, um and going to find people who were
messing with my brothers on the playground, ready to go
off and fight their fights and tell people off if
(33:31):
I needed to, if they were messing with my brothers,
even though they were twice my size. Um And I
keep that same energy today, like that's just it's who
I am, It's how I've always been. Um So. The
scrappiness came early. But sometimes you just want to chill,
Sometimes you just want to right. So, I think, more
(33:51):
than anything, tapping into the divine feminine for me, it
feels like it will represent the opportunity, the ability to
create a space and a life and an energy and
connections where I feel safe enough to excel. Does that
(34:13):
make sense. I'm really just talking, you know, stream of consciousness,
so and from my heart. So I hope you understand that.
Combine with it a little bit. Um, I started this course.
It's uh So I got a new app. I know
I've been shooting the horn of the meditation studio for
the longest, but I was ready to shake it up.
(34:35):
I need a new meditations. Um. I don't want to
say I was getting bored, but I need a new meditations. So.
I also had on my phone and just wasn't using
a lot insight timer. And it's really great because it's
an app where you can build healthy habits and create
a well being routine that works for you. It's free,
and I love the idea of routine. It's not just
random meditations where you've got to go on there and
(34:57):
you know, swipe, look, search, look for the meditations and
whatever else you want to kind of curate and experience.
You can kind of like sign up for experiences. So
right now, I just started this ten day meditation course,
of which reminds me I actually have to do today's day.
I haven't done it yet. Called Embracing your Divine Feminine
and it's it was created by a woman named Nikki Rhodes.
(35:18):
It's literally like ten or fifteen minutes a day. It's
a guided meditation um again on an app, so it's
on your phone and the courses about you know, with
all the pressures that's around women today, it's a reminder
that the divine feminine resides within all women and that's
more important than ever, it seems these days. And the
course helps you reconnect to the source of all your creation,
(35:40):
power and radiance as a woman. And it says that
through a combination of visualization, breath work, and mindset management,
this course helps you uncover the infinite healing abilities within
and empower you to make a positive and powerful impact
as a connected and radiant woman. And that's where I
am right now. Like I said, service like services a
(36:01):
word that I use interchangeably with impact when it comes
to one of my top core values, because I'm really
just a at my core my heart, like when I
think about my mission in life, I want to make
an impact. I want to make a meaningful, empowering, positive
impact in the lives of the people I come across,
whether it's my family, my friends, my coworkers, um, random
(36:23):
people I don't know, viewers of shows that I'm on,
fans that I engage with, strangers on the street. Um,
I really, I really want to make a positive impact,
and I want to do that as a connected and
radiant woman because I want to feel good while I'm
doing it, and I want to feel connected to the
experiences that I'm a part of. You know, Like sometimes
(36:46):
we're so hustle, hustle, hustle, go go go that, Like
even when we're in a meaningful connection or building a
new relationship or friendship or something random happens that presents
the opportunity for us to have a special experience with
some one. Like we're so distracted and not present because
we're like not connected, because we're all over the place,
because we're burnt out, because we're the opposite of radiant,
(37:09):
that it's a waste of an opportunity to to really
connect um in a meaningful and lasting way. So I
just don't want to miss my life. I don't want
to miss opportunities for meaningful connection. UM. I don't want
to miss the moment, the magic in the in the
moments in life's messes and so yeah, hopefully this course
(37:30):
will help me continue to tap into that. But I'm
just a few days in and I've really been enjoying it.
So if you're curious, you can just download the inside timer.
This is not sponsored, just really start using them again.
But I like it. And again, that course is called
Embracing Your Divine Feminine to tend a course fifteen minutes
a day, really cool way to start the morning. All right,
(37:51):
now it is time for ask Zuri, so let me
go go back to my insta story question. Okay, so
the first question is, Oh, it's funny, it's from It's
Urban zero four. Would you like to host the Miss
(38:13):
Universe competition in the future. So technically Urban submitted this
question before it was announced that I was a backstage commentator.
So my answer is yes, hell, yes, resounding yes. Um.
I was so excited and looking forward to, you know,
the opportunity and possibility of being a part of the
Miss Universe show. And I had the best time. The
(38:34):
women are incredible, all of you know, the competitors. They
just were their crowns so beautifully and they represent their
country so impressively, and these women are killing it like
their resumes though their bios like these women are in
business and finance and law and science, um, they're humanitarians.
(38:54):
It's just it's so impressive. So I can always get
behind celebrating women like that. So I would love to
be a part of it in the future too. So
we shall see. Someone says, Oh, Maria l con Canon's
she's asking me what my favorite interview is. I spoke
to my heart and telling me that the one of
(39:15):
me and Oprah on the red carpet where she gave
me advice about being single, like maybe four years ago,
it's her favorite. Honestly, Maria, that's one of my favorites
because it really did speak to my heart and she
gave me some really good advice and its advice that I,
you know, still followed to this day, which is, you know,
maximizing and utilizing my alone time. And I think that
(39:36):
even transcends being single, right like, even once you're in
relationship to constantly still prioritize yourself. She said, you know,
something to the effect of make yourself the lover, the friend,
the partner that you would want um do all of
the things you told me to drop it like his hat,
so get out in these streets, have some fun. I
was like, say less oprah um, and then when you're ready,
(39:57):
he will show up. And that was the advice that
she gave and it's been incredible. It rings true and
the biggest takeaway for me is just self love right,
focusing on yourself, the one thing that we can control,
and when the time is right, the things that we
want and desire that we're calling in come to us.
(40:18):
I really do believe that and I've seen that um
hold true in my life. Um. Lisa Yanez twelve says
best advice for a theater kid. Oh, that's a fun one.
You know. I was a theater kid. I started Children's
Theater workshop when I was five years old. I was
in theater my entire life, um mineor in theater with
(40:40):
an emphasis on acting at Ohio State. Did like commercials
and oh my god, one day I should tell you
guys about the cringe commercials I was in what I
was in college, But they paid good though who I
was keeping the lights on and paying for all of
my icebreaker outfits. Cheap hills from Charlotte roofs um My
(41:00):
best advice for theater kid is decide what you want
out of your theater experience, Like do you just not
just want to? But is your goal to experience theater
because you love it because you're passionate, um, And it's
just the camaraderie and the art, and you don't mind
if you're doing theater in the middle of nowhere or
(41:21):
on Broadway. If that's the case, um, then it's it
will help you set expectations right or tangible goals around it.
Like everyone who loves theater doesn't want to go be
an actor in Hollywood. Um, you can be a theater
teacher or instructor. You can just volunteer on weekends at
a theater camp or of course for kids like that
(41:42):
can be your connection. Um. But if you really want
to chase the dream and pursue theater professionally, my advice
is to go for it, to go all in on it,
and to give yourself a certain amount of time. I know.
That's I like to think it's pragmatic and get us.
Some people can say, no, there is no time limit.
(42:02):
I'll do this forever till I die. And I kind
of love that too, Like you gotta have that passion.
But I'm someone who also you know, likes to see
both sides of a thing, and I don't really believe
in backup plans for as long as I am actively
pursuing something. So it's like, Okay, I'm gonna give myself
five years in New York because I'm moving from Ohio
or wherever, um to pursue theater with everything and me
(42:24):
everything I've got. And if after five years it's not working,
or I'm not getting the breakthrough I want it, or
I haven't ended up on Broadway, whatever the specific goals
are you've had, then I will take a step back
and reassess, or I will pivot to, you know, pursuing
other avenues to keep theater in my life that aren't
necessarily the big lights and stage. Um. And then the
(42:47):
cool thing about changing your mind is you could look
up five years from then and be like, actually, I
want to keep doing this, and then you keep doing it.
But I've always felt that in my experience, if I
don't give myself a time limit, I'll be sitting there
in limbo, ambivalenteous heck about literally ending at everything, including
what I want to eat for dinner. Um. Yeah, so
(43:07):
someone requested anonymous, but she asked, I'm actually wondering how
you stay motivated to stay in shape as an extremely
busy woman. That's a good question, and I'll be honest,
I'm not super motivated because I like working out to me,
is not fun. I do not like the gym. I
love doing fun things. So the best way to get
me active or sweating or doing some cardio is if
(43:28):
it's an activity. Like I love horseback riding, I'll go
rock climbing. I'll do a hike, sure, but like I
like activities, I'll go kayaking. But I need to be
doing something. I can't just be in a gym lifting
the same chunk of metal over and over and over
again for hashtag gains, even though I am out trying
to get these games. But my metabolism is nuts. And
I don't mean that in a braggy way. I mean that.
(43:50):
I to continue answering your question. Um, I'm motivated to
stay in shape because, like, I'm a little underweight technically
even though I eat everything I want, but I'm all
is grazing throughout the day, so I'm I'm never really
just like stuffing my face and anyone sitting. So they
tell me that's good long term for my metabolism, but
(44:11):
like I want to put on a few more pounds
just to be healthier and feel healthier, I have a
little more energy. Um. And yeah, so that's why I like,
I'm motivated less by trying to look a certain way
and more by wanting to be healthy, having my body actually, um,
(44:32):
be healthy and strong enough to take care of me, uh,
to not get sick as easily. I've been getting sick
a little bit more with like random common colds. I
never used to get cold, and then like these last
like six months, I've just been off and on with
like this body. Like what. Um, So that's my motivation
to just you know, and I'm starting small, Like I'm
(44:53):
not gonna lie to you and say I've been doing
the most, but I'm trying to stay consistent with a
daily multi vitamin. I probably am doing it every from today.
At this point. I was doing good with my protein
shakes for like a couple of weeks, maybe a few weeks,
and then I fell off because it's just a process
making that thing. In the morning. I can barely make
my own cup of coffee. Um, But I was liking
(45:15):
the energy that it gave me. Um. Sometimes I get
so busy with work, I forget to eat or don't
have time to eat. I'm running around the city of
l A from this red carpet to that movie junket
to whatever. It can be exhausting and you don't have
time to eat well, or if you do eat, it's
junk on the go from like tackle bell, which actually
I love, so I don't have a problem with it,
but I know it's not the healthiest. Um. So, the
(45:36):
protein shakes are actually really healthy. My grandma Hall got
me on Boost years ago because she was like, babe,
you need to eat. You don't You don't eat and
you that's not good. And I was like, okay, Grandma,
and then went back to just being too busy. So
she started shipping the Boost to the house. And then
one time I drank and I was like, yeah, this
kind of bangs though, So now I drink Boost. I
(45:59):
keep boosting the fridge and it's easy to grab and
go for sustenance. Um. And then as far as like
actual physical activity, I'll do YouTube videos every now and
then I'll do like a fifteen or a twenty minute
workout on YouTube from the comfort of my home. So
that's it. The motivation at this point is really just
about you know, being in my thirties now and wanting
(46:21):
to be as healthy as possible because you know, I
want all of the things that can come with the
next chapter, Like I want to be married, I want
to have children. I want to be a healthy, active
parent for a really really long time. And so you know,
as I look at that next chapter in my life,
I need to make sure that I'm up to that,
(46:44):
not just mentally, emotionally and financially and professionally, but also
personally and um, physically. So that's really my motivation, trying
to stay around for the kids. Yeah. Um, what else?
Let's see people do one more? David Horse six hundred says,
who's the biggest celeb that you want to interview on
(47:06):
your bucket list? Um? M hmmm. Someone I still have
not interviewed but would love to. Um. She waved at
me once on the Matt Gallery at carpet. That was nice.
Um is Beyonce? She is, uh obviously, so she's Beyonce,
Like Beyonce is the adjective at this point. Uh needs
(47:30):
no introduction, needs no explanation, and we all know she's
notoriously private and doesn't really give a lot of interviews,
but I find that very fascinating because I think the
people who say the least are the people who are
most listened to when they do open their mouth to speak. Um.
And so I'd love to sit down with her in
like a deep dive situation and do you dive? UM,
(47:53):
sit down, because it's one thing to do, like the
quick red carpets or the six minute junket interviews, but
to be able to have, you know, twenty thirty minutes
I'm talking to Anderson Cooper level exclusive, Barbara Walters one
on one, UM, you know, Gail King exclusive and Oprah
(48:14):
Winfrey presents like those are the types of interviews that
I most loved doing, so UM, someone like her would
be really incredible to do one with. UM who else? Rihanna?
I've just never interviewed. I know she's super cool in interviews.
I've had a lot of colleagues who have spoken to her,
and she just is real and just down to earth
and she Allso that would be fun. I'd like to
(48:35):
talk to her. UM. Yeah, and Michelle Obama, like I
I've said before that I would love to interview her
because I'm just so curious about and impressed by how
she navigates a life uh in the public eye and
particularly what was that particularly and particularly one of public
(48:58):
service uh um, while also maintaining boundaries around her personal
life and protecting her partnership UM and her children and
that that that bubble of safety that they've created, like
it's it's such a balancing act and I can't imagine
that it's at all easy. UM. But I'm just she's
(49:20):
someone that is so impressive to me and just such
an incredible um success in her own right, and she
carries herself with such grace and strength and a certain
level of stoicism um, while also clearly being the incredible
matriarch of you know, the Obama family. So I'd love
to sit down with her and talk about all of
(49:42):
the things. UM. So yeah, that's it. Uh, that's it
for today, all right, Okay. UM, So I told you
there was going to be a giveaway at the end
of this episode, So here it is. Remember that book
that I told you about, Awaken your Inner Goddess, Practical
tool Us for Self Care, emotional healing, and self realization. UM,
(50:03):
I'm gonna give away five copies. All you have to
do is leave a review right now, ideally five stars
and a few words a sentence or two about the podcast.
Maybe what's stuck out to you in this episode, any
takeaway that you have what you loved most, um, and
then just leave your at your your Instagram at UM
(50:24):
so that we can slide in the d M s
or your Twitter at just let us know if it's
Instagram or Twitter, and then we'll d M five lucky
winners and we can send you the audible version, the
Kindle version digitally, or we can melet to your old
school baby Amazon Prime. Let's go. UM. So yeah, just
leave a quick review five stars and you're at and
(50:44):
you could be one of five people to walk away
with a book to help you awaken your inner goddess.
And don't forget, I've got that thirty day calendar of
soft Life Affirmations, thirty days to manifest a soft life.
You can get that at the Soft Life Dot Guide.
It's free. All you gotta do is go to the website,
(51:04):
throwing your email address and boom, baby, it's yours. Okay,
So again, I'm wishing you the happiest of New Year's um,
the best of all the things, and I'm excited to
reconnect with you and talk with you more. We have
so much coming down the pipeline, so stay tuned and
in the meantime who um You can follow me on
(51:25):
Insta or TikTok at Zuri Hall and at hey Zuri
Hall on TikTok and I'll talk to you soon. Bye
by