Fred Learns About Makeup!

Fred asks the ladies questions about makeup!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is the Bread Show.

Speaker 2 (00:02):
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(00:23):
data rates may apply. All thanks to Live Nation. Pauline,
I have I have a girl question. I have to
ask you. Okay, I'm a girl. Well that's why I'm
asking here, Jason, I have a girl question.

Speaker 1 (00:34):
Yeah, we'll raise sure if I'm ready. All I need
is time.

Speaker 2 (00:37):
Your child would prove otherwise. But so, and this is
a real question. This is not like I'm not I
saw it on you immediately. Now I think I see
it on Kalin two and so I'm not being critical.
I don't know the answer. So your face was beat
last night for jingle Ball full face of makeup? Right?

Speaker 1 (00:56):
Did you have professionally done? Do you have an mua?
Do it had my mua? My little barstool?

Speaker 2 (01:02):
Girly?

Speaker 1 (01:02):
Are you is it still on. It is still on
in Contell. But that's are you allowed to do that?

Speaker 2 (01:08):
You can you just wear the makeup indefinitely, Like I
thought you had to take it off every day. And
I'm not saying that you shouldn't have. I mean, like,
can you get multiple days out of the beat?

Speaker 1 (01:19):
Personally? No, I cannot.

Speaker 3 (01:20):
But I paid a lot of money for this, so
I'm going to be beat as long as it'll stay on.

Speaker 1 (01:24):
I would too, But it's.

Speaker 2 (01:25):
Like, you know, it's like when you get your car washed,
you know, and like you try and you try and
preserve the car wash as long as possible so you
don't have to get your car washed again, you know
what I mean, Like you get the car washed, then
like if little something gets on the window, then maybe
you clean it yourself. You don't have to go buy
the car wash. I think you should get more out
of it. But I thought it was all that process
was only good for one day, That's what I thought.

Speaker 3 (01:46):
Yeah, I mean you should be like washing your face
that night, doing the whole thing. But when you pay
to look this good, I'm not taking it off.

Speaker 2 (01:53):
Yeah, okay, wait me, I scrubbed and scrubbed and this
is the product of what wouldn't come off.

Speaker 1 (01:57):
I washed my face with about three different face walks.
It looks like you still have makeup. I mean, I
stuff I do, but I don't have anything. I don't
have any foundation on her anything. Oh, I left it on.
I went to sleep and I said, you know what,
we're gonna wear this to work tomorrow.

Speaker 2 (02:09):
No you should, I mean, but I didn't know you
could do. I know you could get.

Speaker 1 (02:13):
More in one day too, you're not supposed to. And
it didn't tell.

Speaker 3 (02:15):
I mean, it doesn't look as good as yesterday, of course,
because I slept and I sleep like a caveman.

Speaker 1 (02:18):
Like That's what I was gonna say.

Speaker 2 (02:19):
How does it not come off like all over everywhere? Like?

Speaker 1 (02:22):
How does it look over hobby? Right now, it's on
the pillow case. Thank you.

Speaker 3 (02:25):
I'm happy that it looks great. I'm gonna wear this
all day. I got some stuff after work. I'm like,
we're gonna just we're gonna just power through. But tonight
I am doing everything shower so then I'll scrub it
off and then you will see it again.

Speaker 1 (02:36):
So you went to bed without washing your face. I'm disgusting,
you know.

Speaker 2 (02:40):
No, I really I did That's what I wasn't trying
to enunciate poor hygiene.

Speaker 1 (02:45):
What I was I was just like, I didn't know.

Speaker 2 (02:48):
You could get more than one day out of it,
And I think that that's fair.

Speaker 1 (02:51):
I think it should be that way. I'm just doing
this because I also work in morning radio, you know
what I mean?

Speaker 3 (02:54):
Like, I don't think, like you know, Becky, the office
is going to go in with her the next day. Like,
I don't know what, h I don't back you at
the office, man, get you? Yeah, I agree? Did you
do the same thing?

Speaker 4 (03:06):
No, you know I do this every morning, apply all
this makeup.

Speaker 1 (03:09):
I don't know how old drag.

Speaker 4 (03:10):
I'm a drag queen, so yeah, no, but I have
been a past Like if my makeup is beat to
the gods like they looked last night, you know what
I'm saying, Yeah, you wear that again, as long as
you didn't get any drool on it. You know what,
Maybe I think it should be that. I think that
should be the standard.

Speaker 1 (03:26):
Yeah, maybe you packed the little drool back in the morning.

Speaker 4 (03:29):
You know, when you brush your teeth and then you
replace it with a little foundation to patch it up.

Speaker 1 (03:33):
And you good.

Speaker 2 (03:33):
The amount of like girl stuff I've learned over the
years thanks to you guys. Like I watch you guys
do your makeup every day, and it's just it's really
I'm amazed at the multitasking. I'm I had a girlfriend
once who could like curl her eyelashes and drive the
car at the same time and do a good job.
I'm like, you got a metal object right next to
your eyes and you're driving an automobile.

Speaker 1 (03:56):
It seems like a terrible idea. Yeah, y'all could never. No,
I absolutely could not.

Speaker 2 (04:02):
But then you guys are reading Kiki's gouty like one
hand on the laptop, one hand on the dam. I mean,
she's doing the whole thing. It's a complete transformation that occurs.
Sometimes you don't have hair when she comes in and
she comes here. It's unbelievable. It's an unbelievable transformation. And
I know what you probably get it. I asked questions
about the wig all the time, and you get annoyed,
I think, But this is just it's amazing magic to me.

Speaker 1 (04:24):
Because we as men.

Speaker 2 (04:26):
The most I might have to do is like maybe
line up the bottom of my beard a little bit
and maybe trim it down. That's about all this and
brush my teeth. That's about it. Maybe blow dry the
hair maybe, but we're not even feeling that today.

Speaker 1 (04:39):
You guys are so lucky.

Speaker 4 (04:40):
It's so easy for you, Like we have to put
on shape wear and the boob tape and makeup and no,
I put on.

Speaker 1 (04:47):
The boot tape too. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (04:50):
Yeah, they were lifted and separated last night. I'm surprised
you couldn't tell. Thanks for noticing. Thanks for noticing. Jason,
did you know? I mean you are a makeup artist.
You took an afternoon class, so you're certified. Yeah, but
all I do is watching makeup TikTok, so I feel
like I'm pretty knowledgeable. No, it's like for an OCD,
like it's very satisfying to watch people do this. And
I'm amazed at how because I think I would mess

(05:11):
it up and then I have to like redo it
all that. I would be like, that's crooked, I'm read
and I have to take I guess you would have
to make up, remove it and then do it again.

Speaker 1 (05:19):
Do you ever have to do that?

Speaker 2 (05:20):
Yeah? Wing wouldn't be for you, wing dialiner, it's not
wing dialin.

Speaker 1 (05:24):
No, I wouldn't.

Speaker 4 (05:24):
Yeah, certainly know because getting them to match, because your
eyes aren't exactly the same, right, So if you get
one really good wing and you can't get.

Speaker 1 (05:31):
The other to match, it's like night ruined, you know,
night ruined? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (05:35):
Yeah, now I agree. I wouldn't leave the house, right,
don't like that? I mean, when I knew a whole
TV show, I put just one little layer of foundation
on sometimes, like get the the studio and because of
course we don't have people to do that. And even
that to me is a little mystifying. It's like it
doesn't I don't know, It's like where, what is? What
has happened? I can't get it to look exactly the

(05:57):
way that I wanted to, And then I'm like, do
I have to start over? Like one area is a
little more than the others, and I'm like, this is
and no one else would notice this but me. I'm
just it's probably a good thing. I'm a dude for
so many reasons. I will say the skincare prior to
the foundation is the most important part of the foundation,
and then there's not much of that going on, So
what am I supposed to do with that? Well, you
just got to do a little skincare routine to make

(06:17):
sure your moisturized and your because your makeup wears differently,
I put it. They gave me a spray to put
on first. Okay, yep, they gave me. Yeah, they gave
me a little spread. I went into the I went
into the mac counter when I started doing a little
TV show and I said, I need the simplest routine possible,
and they were like, okay, spray this on. Put this,

(06:37):
and lady like painted my arm with to make sure
it was the right thing, and she like, boom done.
She matched you, Yeah, done, That's that's all you gotta do.
And I don't know, it doesn't look great, but it's
better than nothing.

Speaker 4 (06:48):
I guess what I wouldn't give to like also be
at the mall and just run into you at the mac.

Speaker 1 (06:52):
Oh yeah, let's watched this. I would not believe it
was for TV.

Speaker 2 (06:58):
I'll say you what, way back in the day, the
first time around, we had one of those airbrush machines
and we air brushed ourselves.

Speaker 1 (07:05):
I wish I had that, and I got it pretty
good at that.

Speaker 2 (07:08):
It was really yeah, because well again, it was just
it wasn't like contour. Yeah, okay, I don't know wings,
you know, like it was. It was like just one thing,
but we had to mix the color to make it right.
So it was a couple drops of this, couple drops
of that. I got to where I could do that
very fast. You could do weddings, Yeah, I know, I
could do weddings. The people wanted me to do weddings. Yeah,
they wanted me to do their makeup and then do
the little intro for them, which you know, I.

Speaker 1 (07:29):
Don't like that.

Speaker 2 (07:30):
Damn, I really don't like the starting lineup intros at weddings.
We don't have to. That's a whole different branch that
we don't have to. I just can't stand it.

Speaker 1 (07:37):
Wow, the main of it.

Speaker 2 (07:41):
And then it's like she's married to another guy, but
she's supposed to act kind of flirty with the with the.

Speaker 1 (07:46):
The best man.

Speaker 2 (07:48):
Boyfriends get jealous, like why did he have to grab
you like that or pick you up?

Speaker 1 (07:52):
It's like it's not.

Speaker 2 (07:53):
Like, don't work a wedding, but also I don't pick
up my girlfriend like we do pick up girlfriends, right, bride,
you are not Jezebel. That was your role broke, Like,
we're not playing Alan Parsons project.

Speaker 1 (08:12):
You know, let me down.

Speaker 2 (08:15):
And now ki Ki and Big Tim, who I'm just
meeting for the first time at the wedding. I will
thank you, thank you for that information because I want
you to know I wasn't being critical.

Speaker 1 (08:28):
I was just like, why don't more people do this?
Would be smart guys. This is a smart investment right here.
That's a smart investment, is what it was. That's right,