August 27, 2024 • 16 mins
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Bread Show is on. It's stay or go. Danny
is here here. Good morning, Danny, how you doing early?
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Good morning?
Speaker 3 (00:08):
I guess them all right, Danny, Danny, Danny, Danny. You
ever had a Philly cheesteak egg roll? By the way,
They're delicious, aren't they?
Speaker 1 (00:19):
They were invented right here exactly. You're talking to delay.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Now.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
I know there's some question about maybe the nineties. People
say in the nineties, but no, Kiki put him on
the map.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
He's never had mine.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
No, But Danny, that's not That's not why you called
about the Philly Cheesteak eggroll. You called about something else.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
What is that?
Speaker 2 (00:36):
Yeah, I'm calling actually about my relationship that I'm in.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
I need a little advice.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
I have been dating this girl for four months and
we recently had this conversation that seemed like a little
bit of a red flag here. We were talking about
our exes, and she admitted that she has cheated on
her most recent ex boyfriend. She said she knows it's wrong,
(01:05):
and she said she wouldn't do it again. But I'm like, like,
how would I know that?
Speaker 4 (01:10):
You know?
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Like I appreciated her honesty, but like like I just
like can't imagine cheating on a partner, and like, I
guess the thing is, like it wouldn't be that big
of a deal to it was like a ex boyfriend from.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Like years and years ago.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
But she said it was like a recent ex boyfriend.
And I kind of like believe that, saying, like once
a cheater, always a cheater. So now I've just got
it in my head that like this this girl is
a cheater, And I don't know if I should like
break up with her now before it becomes a problem
where if I should stick it out and then like
but I feel like if I stick it out, then
(01:47):
I'm just gonna get cheated on later.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
I don't know, did you ask any questions? I mean,
not that not that is ever a reason to cheat,
but I mean I mean, was it just flat out
like yeah, I was seeing him and then the guy
and start hooking up with that guy. I mean, was
it like very flip? I mean, how does she tell
you this? Did it seem like it was just a
normal thing for her to do, or like did she
justify it? Did she say to you, I cheated on
(02:10):
him and I feel terrible about it. I mean, was
there any remorse or like you know, anything like that,
any emotion.
Speaker 4 (02:17):
No, she just kind of like breathed over it. Like
we were talking about and the people that we had
dated in the past and why like why we broke up,
and she just said, you know, name the other guy's name.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
She's like, yeah, I ended up cheating on him. And
that's when I started to date so and so, and I, you.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Know, cheated on him.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
She was like two guys at the same like, she
cheated on one, they broke up, cheated on another.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
They broke up.
Speaker 5 (02:42):
And now she's seen me and I'm like, you see now,
but you're not the recipient of that said like she
wasn't cheating on this guy with you.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
Right, correct? Yeah, I don't know how what's your problem
you're with her now? That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
Okay, So eight five five five I won one three
five is the number of college group therapy. Danny is
I gonna say, I my opinion on this has changed
a little bit. I can I think there are situations
where like people screw up, you know, maybe there are
a lot of different ways that can happen, but like
if it's a one time no strings attached, and I
(03:20):
know this is like, I'm really like, you know, sort
of splitting hairs here. But if it's a one time,
no strings attached situation where you made a mistake and
the person's not a part of your life and never
will be and whatever, maybe And I also, by the way,
think that if it's truly a one time deal and
you truly believe in your heart that you screwed up,
and you truly believe that it's not something that you
(03:41):
could find yourself ever doing again, I also, hot take
believe that you should that goes with you, you get
buried with that. I don't know that you necessarily should
be telling your partner that you did that. And this
is controversial, but this requires a lot of self awareness
that sometimes people who are willing to cheat don't have.
But my thing is a lot of times when cheat
and then they go tell the other person, their partner
(04:02):
that they cheated. That's about them, that's not about their partner.
They're not trying to They're trying to get it off
their chest and basically put that on someone else who
then gets to live with that so that they can
feel better. If you screwed up one time, truly, I
think you've got to go down with that. That's a
separate thought. But somebody who's cheated more than once, I
think that's a personality disorder. And then this is coming
(04:25):
from a non licensed therapist me untrained, nonlicensed, I think
it speaks to the fact that they see themselves as
more important than everybody else. If it's habitual, If you're
somebody who constantly, I would say twice before you the
most recent relationships, she cheated twice, it strikes me as
somebody who just doesn't necessarily really care about other people
(04:47):
as much as you might think. It strikes me as
somebody who will put her needs above others one time,
maybe depending on the situation, multiple times. That's a person
who is only concerned with herself, in my opinion, in
which case I think it's a bad sign and I
think you should go.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
Guys thoughts, I agree.
Speaker 6 (05:05):
I don't understand why she's telling him that she cheated
like that you're comfortable, like yeah, like, why would you
ever tell your new partner that you cheated? And if
you if she if you were the side dude at
one point, Danny, like you were her side piece. Just know,
you know how you get them and sometimes how you
lose them. That's what the lady tell me. It's with
the lady. Yeah, the wise lady that the wise lady
(05:26):
that advises me. Yeah, this relationship he should go.
Speaker 1 (05:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
I mean it's it's already in his head that he's
gonna get cheated on, like he's never gonna stop. And
that could be the same problem with the other two guys.
She could have told those guys, oh, I cheated on somebody,
and then they're never going to forget that. They'll be,
you know, in your business suspicious all the time, and
she's just gonna end up cheating on you.
Speaker 7 (05:46):
So I think you actually walk away from someone who
your relationship is good, you love them and nothing has
happened to you, Can you walk just walk.
Speaker 8 (05:55):
Away clean and never think of them again?
Speaker 3 (05:56):
If you cheat more than once, if you willing to
tell me about it, almost like you're foreshadowing what might
happen to you, Yes, so that you can say, well.
Speaker 7 (06:05):
Totally, like in your relationships, like deep conversations about mistakes
you made in the past, how you've grown.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
I think a mistake is one time calein. I think
if you cheat on somebody one time, that's the mistake.
I think if you if you can cheat on someone
more than once got me. Yeah, that's that's where I'm at.
One time, Let's have a conversation about it. Let's sit down,
let me understand what was happening. Let me understand why
you thought that that was a good idea or or
why you didn't. That's another thing, is you know, if
she were like, yeah, I did cheat once and it's
(06:33):
the worst thing I ever did, and I'm so remorseful,
and you know, there really seems to be like a
weight on her or him or whomever it was you
know that was cheating. That really makes you feel as
though they learned from it. That's something that I might
I might lean into a little further. But for her
to be like, yeah, I cheated twice and it was recent,
it's her recent relationship.
Speaker 7 (06:51):
Like we give addicts another chance, Like what if somebody
does the work? Like maybe if you think it's a
personality disorder, what if somebody shows that they want to
work on it.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
You know, we don't know if I think it.
Speaker 3 (07:01):
I mean maybe maybe like an addiction specialist or something,
or a mental health specialist, maybe they would put those
things together. But if anything, I think there's a lot.
Speaker 8 (07:09):
Of things that people struggle with.
Speaker 7 (07:10):
I mean, shopping can be an addiction that somebody genuinely
needs help for, and you're gonna leave somebody over.
Speaker 8 (07:15):
I'm just trying to show another.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Side of it in fantas though. No matter what it is,
it doesn't mean you have to stay, of course not.
Speaker 7 (07:20):
But I wouldn't be able to walk away from relationship
where nothing bad happened, and it happened in their past.
Now two times is where I understand where you're coming from.
But I would never let it go in my head
what maybe.
Speaker 8 (07:31):
Could have been.
Speaker 5 (07:31):
But he's never gonna let it go that she's she
cheated on two people, Like it's gonna be.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
In his head.
Speaker 5 (07:37):
Then, yeah, that's what I'm saying in his head, that
she's gonna cheat on me.
Speaker 1 (07:41):
She's gonna cheat on.
Speaker 5 (07:42):
Me, and she with head attitudes, she probably will end
up cheating on you.
Speaker 3 (07:47):
Let me take some calls here, Danny, and you can
listen to the radio or iHeart and I hope it
works out for you. Thanks for sharing, man, Good luck,
Thank you. Eight five three five. Danny's been with a
woman for four months, and she admitted pretty casually. It
sounded like that she has cheated on the last two
guys she's dated. And you talk about alcoholism or whatever narcissism,
(08:07):
it's like, I don't necessarily know. I mean, you can
give somebody a chance, I guess. But like, let's say
this woman is narcissistic and that's why she's doing well
right well, So as addiction, So is alcohol and drug addiction.
You could treat it, but it's it's a it's a disease.
I don't I don't think it's curable.
Speaker 7 (08:23):
But there's no like program for like narcissists can't become
not narcissists, like addicts can be sober.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
Sure, that's true, you know what I mean. I don't know.
Speaker 3 (08:31):
I don't have enough and I don't know enough to
compare the two. But what I can say is one
seems one is chemical, and one, more often than not,
in my opinion, is a choice. And by the way,
even a narcissistic person's making a choice to cheat. I
don't think, oh I do think. I think people again,
this is just my personal opinion. I still think there's
(08:52):
a thought process going on, and even if there's not,
that person's put themselves above you.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
End of story.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
End of story and they put themselves above other people
now multiple times in the recent history, multiple times. That's
a big thing for me. Is I mean one, people
screw up, right, People make mistakes. One time you cheated
on the last two guys you dated. Can we go
back a little further, Can we zoom out a little
bit about before that? I don't like it. I don't
like it. Hey, Brittany, good morning, Hi, good morning, Hi.
(09:22):
What do you think when you hear this stare.
Speaker 9 (09:23):
Go so coming from someone who just got out of
a five year relationship where he was cheating on me
the whole time and I stayed and hope that he
would change. My thing is that it's only four months
in and if this was a long time ago, and
like you said, if she was like it was one time,
it was the worst this is and I ever made
in my life, I could probably move past it. But
(09:45):
like Luciel said, this was so recent and she was
just so openly like, yeah, cheer on this one. Oh yeah,
then I cheer on this one. It would stay in
my mind like she's gonna cheat on me, and it
would eat at me every single day and it would
end up just ruining the relationship.
Speaker 5 (10:00):
Now.
Speaker 9 (10:00):
I do understand where Canon's coming from as well, But
like I said at the same time, me personally, it
would just eat at me every single day and it
would just ruin their relationship.
Speaker 7 (10:10):
Anyway, I'm sorry that happened to you, by the way, Yeah,
I know.
Speaker 9 (10:14):
It's it's okay. Me and my daughter we're brother now.
Speaker 10 (10:17):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Good. Good Brittany, thanks for calling, Thanks for sharing.
Speaker 9 (10:21):
Thank you, Love you guys.
Speaker 1 (10:22):
Have a good day. I love you too. Have a
great day. Hey, Jessica, Good morning, Welcome, Good morning. How
are you hi there? What do you think there?
Speaker 5 (10:29):
Go?
Speaker 1 (10:30):
What do you think? What do.
Speaker 10 (10:32):
I think he should go?
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Yeah? Why?
Speaker 10 (10:36):
I think that that's anxiety that you'll just never get over.
I had something similar happened to me. He ended up
hitting on me with not only one, but two girls.
He has a baby with one of them, and it's
a trauma thing, like you can't control what other people
do unfortunately, so you just like kind of like he said,
(10:58):
like the way you get them to you who completely agree?
Speaker 3 (11:01):
Yeah, I think you really have to ask the questions,
gauge the reaction, Gauge if there's any emotion or pain
attached to it. And you got to look at this situationally.
I mean, someone who's done this back to back, by.
Speaker 7 (11:14):
The way, is that just how he heard it the
information delivered, or is that actually how it was delivered.
Speaker 8 (11:18):
I'm just trying to play devil's advocate.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Well, I don't know that we can.
Speaker 10 (11:23):
I think that if he goes to ask questions and
she kind of, you know, gets defensive about it, I
think you have your answer. No answer is an answer, Okay.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
Yeah, Jessica, thank you, have a good day. I don't
know that there's another side of love you to. I
don't know if there's another side to repetitive habitual cheating. Yeah,
I don't know if there is another. Say, hey, Kayla,
you're a therapist. Oh good, someone who knows what the
hell they're talking about. Hi?
Speaker 1 (11:48):
Hi, how are you certain?
Speaker 3 (11:49):
I'll speak for myself. I don't know what the hell
I'm talking about. What do you think?
Speaker 9 (11:53):
Well, so I am.
Speaker 11 (11:55):
A licensed therapist and I'm about to be taking my
clinical license exams. So the first thought that I had
really was just you know that there it didn't seem
like there was much conversation about how he was feeling about.
Speaker 9 (12:07):
What she said.
Speaker 11 (12:09):
You know, and he didn't like come to her and say, hey,
you said this thing that bothered me and I kind
of want to talk about it to see to kind
of get what her reaction would be. Because if you
don't talk about the feelings, you know it's not going
to work out. And if she's kind of still flippant,
like you said, Fred, I mean, I think he probably
(12:30):
should go at that point. But if she's going to
have a conversation and say, you know, I did feel
bad about this and this was something that I was
having an issue with and now I'm trying to work
on it or be different, that's when that's something different completely.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
Yeah, I mean I guess, But do you believe, Kayla,
that's somebody who does this repetitively. Do you believe that
it might speak to something sort of deeper or at
least a sort of overarching in that this person may
have an issue believing that they're more important than other people,
or they may have an issue, you know, putting their
(13:06):
needs above others. I mean, again, one time, let's let's
talk about it, let's dig in, let's try and figure
this out, but multiple times, and that's what we know
about that's in recent history. A lot of people are
texting going, hey, can we hear about can we hear
about like your past relationships?
Speaker 1 (13:20):
Like it is really the first two times you know
what I mean?
Speaker 11 (13:23):
Right?
Speaker 3 (13:23):
I mean, don't you look at that and say, this
person might not really care what I think?
Speaker 6 (13:30):
Right?
Speaker 11 (13:30):
And I actually think that you made a good point
because if you connect all those stuffs together and it
continues to be an habitual problem, I'm seeing like the
lack of empathy there, which kind of might go towards
a little bit of narcissism and not saying it's a
personality disorder, but I think it definitely lacks empathy. If
(13:51):
it's a habitual, over and over type of thing, then
you know, thinking you're better than other people, that might
just be a serious issue to you know, have to
dive into it. And maybe that's not even his his issue,
you know, to deal with with her, it's obviously hers.
Speaker 8 (14:06):
So I just don't.
Speaker 10 (14:07):
Think that he should.
Speaker 11 (14:09):
He should at least have one conversation or try to
at least to see where she stands with it. But
if somebody cheats over and over and over again, and
it's this pattern of dysfunction, I really think that that's
definitely something deeper with like attachment styles, and I won't
even go into that kind of stuff.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
But I also think Kayla, and again unlicensed versus license
over here, Kayla, but it seems like projection to me.
And I said this before, but it almost seems like
she's coming clean early on, because it's like, well, this
might happen to you, and when it does, I told you,
I told you, so, I told you that I have
this propensity like a terrible person, and.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
So I just want to it just heads up. I mean,
I you know, I mean it's a big surprised you thought,
you know whatever. It seems it feels like that.
Speaker 11 (14:52):
I agree with you. I agree with you, Fred, I
actually do.
Speaker 8 (14:55):
I think that you're right.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
On that one.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
Okay, good, So can you license me? Like by can
you because your license? Can can you then like hand
the license off to me? And can you are you
sanctioned to do that? Because I feel like I'm really.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
Cool for it.
Speaker 10 (15:06):
I don't know if I can do that.
Speaker 11 (15:08):
I would if I could, but I definitely cannot do that.
But I've been listening to you guys for over ten years.
Then I was in college, and so I just want
to say, I love all of you guys so much,
and I listen every single day.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
Well you are the best kille through the summer because
I don't know what the.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Hell everybody's been, but I'm over it now we're moving on.
I God, bless you. I think everybody did. I just
don't know what's going on. Thank you, Kayle, I have
a good day.
Speaker 10 (15:38):
Thank you.
Speaker 3 (15:39):
You think maybe the Durabils started stopped running in the
little cage and the little wheel over at that. Anyway,
I don't know what I can say and not get fined.
I don't want to get fined. I'm just here so
I don't get fined. Yeah, that's him. The Entertaining Report
is next. Kaylin's back, and if you want to take
on show bys, Shelley in the Showdown one hundred bucks,
but you could make history today.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
She's ever lost too.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
In a row eight five five, I've nine one, one,
o three five and play next.
The Bread Show is on. It's stay or go. Danny
is here here. Good morning, Danny, how you doing early?
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Good morning?
Speaker 3 (00:08):
I guess them all right, Danny, Danny, Danny, Danny. You
ever had a Philly cheesteak egg roll? By the way,
They're delicious, aren't they?
Speaker 1 (00:19):
They were invented right here exactly. You're talking to delay.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Now.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
I know there's some question about maybe the nineties. People
say in the nineties, but no, Kiki put him on
the map.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
He's never had mine.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
No, But Danny, that's not That's not why you called
about the Philly Cheesteak eggroll. You called about something else.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
What is that?
Speaker 2 (00:36):
Yeah, I'm calling actually about my relationship that I'm in.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
I need a little advice.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
I have been dating this girl for four months and
we recently had this conversation that seemed like a little
bit of a red flag here. We were talking about
our exes, and she admitted that she has cheated on
her most recent ex boyfriend. She said she knows it's wrong,
(01:05):
and she said she wouldn't do it again. But I'm like, like,
how would I know that?
Speaker 4 (01:10):
You know?
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Like I appreciated her honesty, but like like I just
like can't imagine cheating on a partner, and like, I
guess the thing is, like it wouldn't be that big
of a deal to it was like a ex boyfriend from.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Like years and years ago.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
But she said it was like a recent ex boyfriend.
And I kind of like believe that, saying, like once
a cheater, always a cheater. So now I've just got
it in my head that like this this girl is
a cheater, And I don't know if I should like
break up with her now before it becomes a problem
where if I should stick it out and then like
but I feel like if I stick it out, then
(01:47):
I'm just gonna get cheated on later.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
I don't know, did you ask any questions? I mean,
not that not that is ever a reason to cheat,
but I mean I mean, was it just flat out
like yeah, I was seeing him and then the guy
and start hooking up with that guy. I mean, was
it like very flip? I mean, how does she tell
you this? Did it seem like it was just a
normal thing for her to do, or like did she
justify it? Did she say to you, I cheated on
(02:10):
him and I feel terrible about it. I mean, was
there any remorse or like you know, anything like that,
any emotion.
Speaker 4 (02:17):
No, she just kind of like breathed over it. Like
we were talking about and the people that we had
dated in the past and why like why we broke up,
and she just said, you know, name the other guy's name.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
She's like, yeah, I ended up cheating on him. And
that's when I started to date so and so, and I, you.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Know, cheated on him.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
She was like two guys at the same like, she
cheated on one, they broke up, cheated on another.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
They broke up.
Speaker 5 (02:42):
And now she's seen me and I'm like, you see now,
but you're not the recipient of that said like she
wasn't cheating on this guy with you.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
Right, correct? Yeah, I don't know how what's your problem
you're with her now? That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
Okay, So eight five five five I won one three
five is the number of college group therapy. Danny is
I gonna say, I my opinion on this has changed
a little bit. I can I think there are situations
where like people screw up, you know, maybe there are
a lot of different ways that can happen, but like
if it's a one time no strings attached, and I
(03:20):
know this is like, I'm really like, you know, sort
of splitting hairs here. But if it's a one time,
no strings attached situation where you made a mistake and
the person's not a part of your life and never
will be and whatever, maybe And I also, by the way,
think that if it's truly a one time deal and
you truly believe in your heart that you screwed up,
and you truly believe that it's not something that you
(03:41):
could find yourself ever doing again, I also, hot take
believe that you should that goes with you, you get
buried with that. I don't know that you necessarily should
be telling your partner that you did that. And this
is controversial, but this requires a lot of self awareness
that sometimes people who are willing to cheat don't have.
But my thing is a lot of times when cheat
and then they go tell the other person, their partner
(04:02):
that they cheated. That's about them, that's not about their partner.
They're not trying to They're trying to get it off
their chest and basically put that on someone else who
then gets to live with that so that they can
feel better. If you screwed up one time, truly, I
think you've got to go down with that. That's a
separate thought. But somebody who's cheated more than once, I
think that's a personality disorder. And then this is coming
(04:25):
from a non licensed therapist me untrained, nonlicensed, I think
it speaks to the fact that they see themselves as
more important than everybody else. If it's habitual, If you're
somebody who constantly, I would say twice before you the
most recent relationships, she cheated twice, it strikes me as
somebody who just doesn't necessarily really care about other people
(04:47):
as much as you might think. It strikes me as
somebody who will put her needs above others one time,
maybe depending on the situation, multiple times. That's a person
who is only concerned with herself, in my opinion, in
which case I think it's a bad sign and I
think you should go.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
Guys thoughts, I agree.
Speaker 6 (05:05):
I don't understand why she's telling him that she cheated
like that you're comfortable, like yeah, like, why would you
ever tell your new partner that you cheated? And if
you if she if you were the side dude at
one point, Danny, like you were her side piece. Just know,
you know how you get them and sometimes how you
lose them. That's what the lady tell me. It's with
the lady. Yeah, the wise lady that the wise lady
(05:26):
that advises me. Yeah, this relationship he should go.
Speaker 1 (05:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
I mean it's it's already in his head that he's
gonna get cheated on, like he's never gonna stop. And
that could be the same problem with the other two guys.
She could have told those guys, oh, I cheated on somebody,
and then they're never going to forget that. They'll be,
you know, in your business suspicious all the time, and
she's just gonna end up cheating on you.
Speaker 7 (05:46):
So I think you actually walk away from someone who
your relationship is good, you love them and nothing has
happened to you, Can you walk just walk.
Speaker 8 (05:55):
Away clean and never think of them again?
Speaker 3 (05:56):
If you cheat more than once, if you willing to
tell me about it, almost like you're foreshadowing what might
happen to you, Yes, so that you can say, well.
Speaker 7 (06:05):
Totally, like in your relationships, like deep conversations about mistakes
you made in the past, how you've grown.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
I think a mistake is one time calein. I think
if you cheat on somebody one time, that's the mistake.
I think if you if you can cheat on someone
more than once got me. Yeah, that's that's where I'm at.
One time, Let's have a conversation about it. Let's sit down,
let me understand what was happening. Let me understand why
you thought that that was a good idea or or
why you didn't. That's another thing, is you know, if
she were like, yeah, I did cheat once and it's
(06:33):
the worst thing I ever did, and I'm so remorseful,
and you know, there really seems to be like a
weight on her or him or whomever it was you
know that was cheating. That really makes you feel as
though they learned from it. That's something that I might
I might lean into a little further. But for her
to be like, yeah, I cheated twice and it was recent,
it's her recent relationship.
Speaker 7 (06:51):
Like we give addicts another chance, Like what if somebody
does the work? Like maybe if you think it's a
personality disorder, what if somebody shows that they want to
work on it.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
You know, we don't know if I think it.
Speaker 3 (07:01):
I mean maybe maybe like an addiction specialist or something,
or a mental health specialist, maybe they would put those
things together. But if anything, I think there's a lot.
Speaker 8 (07:09):
Of things that people struggle with.
Speaker 7 (07:10):
I mean, shopping can be an addiction that somebody genuinely
needs help for, and you're gonna leave somebody over.
Speaker 8 (07:15):
I'm just trying to show another.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Side of it in fantas though. No matter what it is,
it doesn't mean you have to stay, of course not.
Speaker 7 (07:20):
But I wouldn't be able to walk away from relationship
where nothing bad happened, and it happened in their past.
Now two times is where I understand where you're coming from.
But I would never let it go in my head
what maybe.
Speaker 8 (07:31):
Could have been.
Speaker 5 (07:31):
But he's never gonna let it go that she's she
cheated on two people, Like it's gonna be.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
In his head.
Speaker 5 (07:37):
Then, yeah, that's what I'm saying in his head, that
she's gonna cheat on me.
Speaker 1 (07:41):
She's gonna cheat on.
Speaker 5 (07:42):
Me, and she with head attitudes, she probably will end
up cheating on you.
Speaker 3 (07:47):
Let me take some calls here, Danny, and you can
listen to the radio or iHeart and I hope it
works out for you. Thanks for sharing, man, Good luck,
Thank you. Eight five three five. Danny's been with a
woman for four months, and she admitted pretty casually. It
sounded like that she has cheated on the last two
guys she's dated. And you talk about alcoholism or whatever narcissism,
(08:07):
it's like, I don't necessarily know. I mean, you can
give somebody a chance, I guess. But like, let's say
this woman is narcissistic and that's why she's doing well
right well, So as addiction, So is alcohol and drug addiction.
You could treat it, but it's it's a it's a disease.
I don't I don't think it's curable.
Speaker 7 (08:23):
But there's no like program for like narcissists can't become
not narcissists, like addicts can be sober.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
Sure, that's true, you know what I mean. I don't know.
Speaker 3 (08:31):
I don't have enough and I don't know enough to
compare the two. But what I can say is one
seems one is chemical, and one, more often than not,
in my opinion, is a choice. And by the way,
even a narcissistic person's making a choice to cheat. I
don't think, oh I do think. I think people again,
this is just my personal opinion. I still think there's
(08:52):
a thought process going on, and even if there's not,
that person's put themselves above you.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
End of story.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
End of story and they put themselves above other people
now multiple times in the recent history, multiple times. That's
a big thing for me. Is I mean one, people
screw up, right, People make mistakes. One time you cheated
on the last two guys you dated. Can we go
back a little further, Can we zoom out a little
bit about before that? I don't like it. I don't
like it. Hey, Brittany, good morning, Hi, good morning, Hi.
(09:22):
What do you think when you hear this stare.
Speaker 9 (09:23):
Go so coming from someone who just got out of
a five year relationship where he was cheating on me
the whole time and I stayed and hope that he
would change. My thing is that it's only four months
in and if this was a long time ago, and
like you said, if she was like it was one time,
it was the worst this is and I ever made
in my life, I could probably move past it. But
(09:45):
like Luciel said, this was so recent and she was
just so openly like, yeah, cheer on this one. Oh yeah,
then I cheer on this one. It would stay in
my mind like she's gonna cheat on me, and it
would eat at me every single day and it would
end up just ruining the relationship.
Speaker 5 (10:00):
Now.
Speaker 9 (10:00):
I do understand where Canon's coming from as well, But
like I said at the same time, me personally, it
would just eat at me every single day and it
would just ruin their relationship.
Speaker 7 (10:10):
Anyway, I'm sorry that happened to you, by the way, Yeah,
I know.
Speaker 9 (10:14):
It's it's okay. Me and my daughter we're brother now.
Speaker 10 (10:17):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Good. Good Brittany, thanks for calling, Thanks for sharing.
Speaker 9 (10:21):
Thank you, Love you guys.
Speaker 1 (10:22):
Have a good day. I love you too. Have a
great day. Hey, Jessica, Good morning, Welcome, Good morning. How
are you hi there? What do you think there?
Speaker 5 (10:29):
Go?
Speaker 1 (10:30):
What do you think? What do.
Speaker 10 (10:32):
I think he should go?
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Yeah? Why?
Speaker 10 (10:36):
I think that that's anxiety that you'll just never get over.
I had something similar happened to me. He ended up
hitting on me with not only one, but two girls.
He has a baby with one of them, and it's
a trauma thing, like you can't control what other people
do unfortunately, so you just like kind of like he said,
(10:58):
like the way you get them to you who completely agree?
Speaker 3 (11:01):
Yeah, I think you really have to ask the questions,
gauge the reaction, Gauge if there's any emotion or pain
attached to it. And you got to look at this situationally.
I mean, someone who's done this back to back, by.
Speaker 7 (11:14):
The way, is that just how he heard it the
information delivered, or is that actually how it was delivered.
Speaker 8 (11:18):
I'm just trying to play devil's advocate.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Well, I don't know that we can.
Speaker 10 (11:23):
I think that if he goes to ask questions and
she kind of, you know, gets defensive about it, I
think you have your answer. No answer is an answer, Okay.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
Yeah, Jessica, thank you, have a good day. I don't
know that there's another side of love you to. I
don't know if there's another side to repetitive habitual cheating. Yeah,
I don't know if there is another. Say, hey, Kayla,
you're a therapist. Oh good, someone who knows what the
hell they're talking about. Hi?
Speaker 1 (11:48):
Hi, how are you certain?
Speaker 3 (11:49):
I'll speak for myself. I don't know what the hell
I'm talking about. What do you think?
Speaker 9 (11:53):
Well, so I am.
Speaker 11 (11:55):
A licensed therapist and I'm about to be taking my
clinical license exams. So the first thought that I had
really was just you know that there it didn't seem
like there was much conversation about how he was feeling about.
Speaker 9 (12:07):
What she said.
Speaker 11 (12:09):
You know, and he didn't like come to her and say, hey,
you said this thing that bothered me and I kind
of want to talk about it to see to kind
of get what her reaction would be. Because if you
don't talk about the feelings, you know it's not going
to work out. And if she's kind of still flippant,
like you said, Fred, I mean, I think he probably
(12:30):
should go at that point. But if she's going to
have a conversation and say, you know, I did feel
bad about this and this was something that I was
having an issue with and now I'm trying to work
on it or be different, that's when that's something different completely.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
Yeah, I mean I guess, But do you believe, Kayla,
that's somebody who does this repetitively. Do you believe that
it might speak to something sort of deeper or at
least a sort of overarching in that this person may
have an issue believing that they're more important than other people,
or they may have an issue, you know, putting their
(13:06):
needs above others. I mean, again, one time, let's let's
talk about it, let's dig in, let's try and figure
this out, but multiple times, and that's what we know
about that's in recent history. A lot of people are
texting going, hey, can we hear about can we hear
about like your past relationships?
Speaker 1 (13:20):
Like it is really the first two times you know
what I mean?
Speaker 11 (13:23):
Right?
Speaker 3 (13:23):
I mean, don't you look at that and say, this
person might not really care what I think?
Speaker 6 (13:30):
Right?
Speaker 11 (13:30):
And I actually think that you made a good point
because if you connect all those stuffs together and it
continues to be an habitual problem, I'm seeing like the
lack of empathy there, which kind of might go towards
a little bit of narcissism and not saying it's a
personality disorder, but I think it definitely lacks empathy. If
(13:51):
it's a habitual, over and over type of thing, then
you know, thinking you're better than other people, that might
just be a serious issue to you know, have to
dive into it. And maybe that's not even his his issue,
you know, to deal with with her, it's obviously hers.
Speaker 8 (14:06):
So I just don't.
Speaker 10 (14:07):
Think that he should.
Speaker 11 (14:09):
He should at least have one conversation or try to
at least to see where she stands with it. But
if somebody cheats over and over and over again, and
it's this pattern of dysfunction, I really think that that's
definitely something deeper with like attachment styles, and I won't
even go into that kind of stuff.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
But I also think Kayla, and again unlicensed versus license
over here, Kayla, but it seems like projection to me.
And I said this before, but it almost seems like
she's coming clean early on, because it's like, well, this
might happen to you, and when it does, I told you,
I told you, so, I told you that I have
this propensity like a terrible person, and.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
So I just want to it just heads up. I mean,
I you know, I mean it's a big surprised you thought,
you know whatever. It seems it feels like that.
Speaker 11 (14:52):
I agree with you. I agree with you, Fred, I
actually do.
Speaker 8 (14:55):
I think that you're right.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
On that one.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
Okay, good, So can you license me? Like by can
you because your license? Can can you then like hand
the license off to me? And can you are you
sanctioned to do that? Because I feel like I'm really.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
Cool for it.
Speaker 10 (15:06):
I don't know if I can do that.
Speaker 11 (15:08):
I would if I could, but I definitely cannot do that.
But I've been listening to you guys for over ten years.
Then I was in college, and so I just want
to say, I love all of you guys so much,
and I listen every single day.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
Well you are the best kille through the summer because
I don't know what the.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Hell everybody's been, but I'm over it now we're moving on.
I God, bless you. I think everybody did. I just
don't know what's going on. Thank you, Kayle, I have
a good day.
Speaker 10 (15:38):
Thank you.
Speaker 3 (15:39):
You think maybe the Durabils started stopped running in the
little cage and the little wheel over at that. Anyway,
I don't know what I can say and not get fined.
I don't want to get fined. I'm just here so
I don't get fined. Yeah, that's him. The Entertaining Report
is next. Kaylin's back, and if you want to take
on show bys, Shelley in the Showdown one hundred bucks,
but you could make history today.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
She's ever lost too.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
In a row eight five five, I've nine one, one,
o three five and play next.
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