Unlocking the Inner Game: Rewiring Your Beliefs to Sell with Confidence and Lead with Purpose

Episode Transcript
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(00:01):
Welcome to Close it now, thepodcast that's revolutionizing the
H Vac and home improvementtrades industries.
Get ready to dive deep intothe world of heating, ventilation
and air conditioning.
We're turning up the heat onindustry standards and cooling down
misconceptions.
And we're not just talkingabout fixing vents and adjusting

(00:21):
thermostats.
It's about the transformativemovement that's reshaping the very
foundation of H Vac and home improvement.
We're the driving force,inspiring top performers who crave
excellence not only in theirprofessional endeavors, but also
in fitness, nutrition,relationships and personal growth,
proving that we can indeedhave it all.

(00:44):
This is Close it now, whereexcellence meets excitement.
Let's get to work now.
Your host, Sam Wakefield.
Well, all right.
Welcome back to Close It Now.
Sam Wakefield here.
I am so excited and honored tohave this guest on the show today

(01:07):
as we go along.
If you've listened to this ToClose it now for very, very long
or very many episodes, youknow that sales is more than just
a script that you learn.
There are no magic bullets in cells.
You can hand the same scriptto two different people and one person,
they both maybe know thescript perfectly.
One person gets mediocreresults in the gets incredible results.

(01:32):
But on face value, when youride with them or you, you know,
you role play with them,they're just as equally good.
What's the difference?
There are so many underlyingthings that determine where you when
someone's successful andsomeone isn't.
One of the things that I loveto say so much, everybody listening
is sales is not theperformance of an hour.

(01:54):
It's the overflow of a life.
And so that is exactly why Ihave this guest on the show today.
This is Stephanie Kwong.
I'm so excited to introduce her.
She is definitely a highlysought after expert in subconscious
transformation, known as thesecret weapon to the top 1% of high

(02:15):
performers, which I knoweveryone on the show, you are that
top 1% or you're striving tobe that top 1%.
So with over 14 years ofexperience, she has helped thousands
of individuals dismantle deepseated mental and emotional barriers,
unlocking profound levels ofpeace, joy, power and freedom.

(02:35):
She's the co founder of therapid rewire method, which I know
all of you are into fast transformation.
We don't want it to takeforever, just like in cells.
And a groundbreaking systemthat blends advanced scientific and
spiritual methodologies tocreate rapid, lasting transformation.

(02:56):
There's a lot here through herextensive work spanning high level
retreats, online trainingprograms, and immense workshop, immersive
workshops.
She's impacted thousandsworldwide, providing tools that rewire
the mind and body foraccelerated personal and professional
growth.
And I'm going to let you talkabout your mission as well.
So welcome to the show, Stephanie.

(03:16):
So happy to have you here.
Oh, thanks for having me, Sam.
Yeah, absolutely.
Conversation.
Yeah, totally.
So, as we do with all of our.
The guests on our guestepisodes, we'd love for you to take
a couple minutes and giveeverybody your highlight reel.
How in the world did you endup in this place that you are right
now where you're able toaffect transformation in so many

(03:39):
people?
What got you started on this journey?
And a little bit of yourhighlight reel of how you got here.
And then definitely would lovefor you to intertwine.
What's your, like, really yourmain calling point?
What.
What is the.
Your driving force that your.
Your true inspiration behindwhat you do?

(03:59):
How much time do we have?
As long as you need.
I'll try to keep it as shortas possible.
But look, my true mission isto liberate humanity.
And what do I mean by that?
I think a lot of us are inthese invisible cages that either
someone has placed us in or.
Or we have chosen to step intothat we don't even see are not truly

(04:24):
who we are.
It's holding us back fromreally living our lives in the way
that we're meant to, toachieving, to experiencing what life
really has to offer because weare in, you know, limitations in
some way.
And so when I talk aboutliberation, it's unlocking that and
having people rewrite, rewire,transform those limitations into,

(04:50):
you know, expansion andabundance and growth, which I think
we're really here to live into.
And I actually fell into coaching.
I was working in entertainmentand realized that where I felt most
fulfilled was when I was inservice, when I was giving back.
And I had a.
Some trauma in my childhood.
And so I had.

(05:11):
Don't we all?
Yeah.
My gosh.
I dove deep into my own innerlandscape to heal, to transform,
and really to elevate myselfin my life in, you know, how I wanted
to be in the world and alsowhat I wanted to achieve.
I come from a Chinese culture.
We're really indoctrinatedinto hard work.

(05:32):
But hard work doesn't alwaysequal success.
True.
Because we can only play atthe level of our identity, to what
we believe about who we are,what we're capable of, and what we
feel we're worthy or deservingof having.
That.
That's really the ceiling, theinvisible ceiling, the Limit that
we.
That we have been, you know,indoctrinated into or are living

(05:55):
into.
So that's why coming to.
And I know you've probablytalked about this on your show, if
two people have the same exactsales script, why does one kick butt
with it and the other feellike they're struggling and not getting
the results?
Well, it's not just a matterof strategy.
It's really about thepsychology piece.
And that's why I love Sam,that you dive so deeply into the

(06:17):
psychological piece as wellwhen you train in sales and not just
about the strategy of how towin the sale.
Right.
And so I really look at theinner game for people, and I had
to look at the inner game formyself first again, you know, observing
my own interior landscape,pulling up the roots of the things
that were not serving me, thebeliefs, the identities, and then

(06:41):
being willing to overcome andtranscend them.
And so I realized pretty earlyon in my career, which started, you
know, I started coaching backin 2007, that the subconscious is
really where it's at.
And so I dove into learningall these different tools and modalities
like nlp, SomaticExperiencing, breath work, hypnosis,

(07:03):
Tre Havening, you name it, alot of different modalities.
If I wasn't trained in them,I've experienced them as a client
first.
And I really wanted to sharpenmy skills as well as someone who
could create rapid and lasting change.
And so I worked in a clinicalsetting where I really, really honed

(07:24):
my skills was inside of atreatment center for women with borderline
personality disorder, bipolarmood disorders, because people said,
well, they can't change.
They only can cope and manage.
And throughout the five yearsof being there, it was a difficult
population to work with, butit really had me cultivate skill
to go, no, I actually thinkthat they can change.

(07:46):
And when I took on thatparadigm, it helped me to accelerate
my skill level and to figureout how can I actually support these
people in doing that.
And I got so good at creatingrapid and lasting change that I was
starting to work with someonewho was a pretty high level in the
entertainment field.
And then she introduced me tosomebody who was really high up at

(08:07):
Facebook.
And then that person atFacebook introduced me to her friend
who was one of the first 20employees at Facebook.
I helped that person, and thenext thing you know, that person
filled up my calendar withtheir friends.
Now I'm going to.
I know this person by first name.
Oh, I use this product thisperson created.

(08:31):
And so that's really how Ibecame you know, the secret weapon
to these top 1%, these reallyhigh performing people.
But because I'd honed myskills to really achieve rapid and
lasting change.
Because when you're performingat a high level, you don't have time
to sit and talk about yourproblems and almost re traumatize
yourself by telling the storyof what you're stuck or struggling

(08:53):
with.
I really wanted to help peopletranscend it, and I was able to achieve
that.
However, when back in February2021, I had a miscarriage.
And even with all the toolsI'd been trained in, even with an
amazing community of coaches,therapists, healers, shamans that
I accumulated since 2007, Iwas stuck in grief.

(09:18):
Mm.
And I know how grief moves.
But this time nothing washelping it.
And I was becoming moredebilitated in my ability to function.
And being an entrepreneur,taking five months off was really
difficult.
On the pocketbook, right?
Yeah.
Also, it was just hard beingin such a dark space.

(09:42):
I was, you know, entertainingsuicidal ideation where I'm just
stuck in deep depression andit wasn't a way I wanted to live.
And yet I couldn't find thekey out.
And then I got processed withwhat we work called the rapid rebar
tools.
And literally, in one traumaintegration process, I was able to

(10:06):
experience the full processingof that moment and then release it.
And by the end of that 60minute session, I couldn't even feel
or find sadness or grief in mybody anymore.
Wow.
Gone.
It's never come back.
I've never had to reprocess orjournal or breathe or tap or meditate
about it.
It was like once integrationoccurred, it was done.

(10:29):
And I was so floored becauseagain, where I came from, I'm like,
I know what I can do.
But this was something sodifferent than I had ever experienced.
And it felt easy and it was so fast.
And I felt the immediate shiftat the end.
And the change occurred to thepoint where my behavior shifted on
the spot.
And so I was like, what is this?

(10:51):
And I want more.
So I continued to work with myco founder, Wesley.
We started clearing morethings at rapid speed.
He started showing me thetools, which are actually not difficult
to learn and to facilitate.
And then the next thing youknow, I got a download that I heard.
You're meant to bring thesetools into the world.

(11:12):
Yeah.
And so that's how the rapidrewire method was born.
And I'm really committed toliberating humanity, that people
can do it swiftly and sustain.
Because if you haven'tnoticed, the world is on fire.
I think at this point, it'smore than the dumpster fire.

(11:32):
It feels like the entirelandfill is on fire.
Oh, my God.
So for everybody listening,date of recording is June 18, 2025.
For some reference point right now.
Yeah.
And people are struggling, andthey need help, and they need it
now.
Yeah.
And also, you know, I wanted.

(11:52):
Because think part of thepeople you're speaking to, Sam, they're
also humans.
Yes, they have a job.
Yes, they're doing the sales,but they also have something outside
of their work, which is their,you know, life, where they might
also be struggling in other ways.
And it all intertwines.
And so we dive in and do thedeep work and.

(12:13):
And clear out the traumas andheal the parts of ourselves that
felt unloved, unworthy, notenough, etc.
We can then perform better inour lives, you know, and in our business.
And that.
That's what most people wantis to, you know, accelerate their

(12:33):
own personal growth so thatthey can also, you know, achieve
greater things in life and business.
Oh, no doubt.
I love that.
Love your story so much aswell, you know, it's.
It.
It reminds me, you know,there's so many things that we go
through in life, and, youknow, I've lived through a lot of
things and currently am.

(12:55):
You know, we all think we havethese really strong opinions about
things until it comes to livein your own house.
And then when it shows up inyour own space, all of a sudden it
just.
It's like a bucket of coldwater on you, and it forces you to
rethink if you're open to it.
And thankfully, I know thisand I know my community is open to.
It forces you to reallyrethink the way that we were taught

(13:17):
about our belief systems.
Is this truly the right way tothink, or is it something I was taught?
Is this what I believe?
Or it's something that I wastold I should believe about internal
and external circumstances.
So I'm 100% understand where you're.
I don't understand.
I never say I understandsomeone else, but I can see your

(13:41):
perspective and where you'recoming from, and I completely resonate
with that.
So I love that you talkedabout the quick transformation for
everybody on the show.
You know, I love brain science.
We talk about brain sciencehere all the time.
So everything from NLP tohypnosis to.
I think I'm the only person inall of home services that's ever

(14:03):
recorded a guided meditationfor top performers.
But I'd love for you to dive Alittle deeper into this.
Because when we talk aboutthese tools and the things that to.
For transformation, you know,fast transformation is incredible

(14:24):
when it happens.
And so many times that I knowa lot of people that.
So this is going to be a heavy episode.
Everybody, I can already tell,I'm feeling the weight, I feel the
gravity on my shoulders right now.
You know, there's so many things.
In fact, I was talking to mywife about this last night.
You know, growing up in allthese different, everything from
religious atmospheres to, youknow, all the different types of

(14:48):
pseudo or quote unquote,transformational type of miracle
moments and just there's amyriad of things.
And then so many of us havelooked around and watched, you know,
these, you know, so calledmiracles and true transformations
that people have had allaround us.
And then it never happened for me.

(15:10):
And then we have this feelingof, did I not pray hard enough?
Did I not think hard enough?
Did I not do this hard enough?
What's wrong with me?
And so it's almost like thisguilt and shame rests on you.
And it's like, what am I notdoing right?
Because we've studied 8,000different modalities and it never

(15:33):
seems to quite get there.
And so what we're talkingabout today is so insanely intriguing
to me because I know thatthere's solutions for these things.
Why has it never happened?
And I know I'm not the only one.
I know there's plenty ofpeople on the show that are listening
and thinking, oh my gosh, thisis me too.
So what is some of thedifference here?

(15:53):
Because I'm insanely intriguedby this.
But how is it different thanall of these other things?
You know, if we.
Everything from praying andbelieving to the right meditations
to, you know, whatever, allthe different, everybody from Joe
Dispenza to Tony Robbins, youname it.
What's different?
Yeah, that's a good question, Sam.

(16:16):
You know, I think a lot of wedon't like to say anything negative
about other modalities.
However, not every modality iscreated the same.
Sure, right.
And there's a lot of tools,practices, modalities that only touch
the conscious level of the mind.

(16:37):
And so that's why it can takea long time or you don't see change.
Conscious level podcasts,reading books, talking about your
problems.
Right.
It doesn't actually hit thesubconscious, where your blueprint
is, where these beliefs arestored, whether they're empowering
beliefs or limiting beliefs,disempowering beliefs.

(17:00):
And so it really requiresgoing deeper into the subconscious.
And there are tools that helpwith that.
And even some of thesubconscious rewiring tools like
when I use hypnosis, doesn'talways address every way that a memory
or an experience is stored.

(17:20):
So when we look at our tools,it's like, okay, we have to look
at mental, emotional and somatic.
So all of our processes workthrough the images, thoughts, emotions
and body sensations, which ishow a memory or an experience is
stored, the mind and the body.
And that's why we're able toget changed so quickly, because we're
actually working and clearingwhatever has been stuck or you've

(17:44):
been struggling with.
Right.
These coping identities, theselimiting beliefs that you might have,
but in a ways that they'restored in the unconscious mind.
And that's how you can getfaster and better results versus
feeling like, why am I tryingso hard?
How come I keep doing the samething over and over again and I'm

(18:06):
not seeing the result yet?
And prayer is so powerful.
But most people when theypray, it's praying because something
feels like it's missing orit's lacking and you want something
versus to me, really effective prayer.
Prayer is giving thanks forwhat you want before it's already
shown up.
Right?

(18:26):
Because now you're affirmingthat in your system and going, yes,
it's, it's mine.
Because if something's beenplaced on your heart, I believe that
it's for, it is for you.
Then your work is to realignyourself, to be able to receive the
very gift that you've beenpraying for.
And by doing that, it's, youknow, giving thanks instead of feeling

(18:47):
frustrated or stuck or askingwhy not me or why don't I have it?
That's coming from a place oflack of limitation.
So for me, I would say thatthat's why maybe that doesn't work.
But also a lot of tools, same thing.
Are we just focusing on what'snot working?
Are we looking at transcendingit truly?
Sure, yeah.
The wish fulfilled is verymuch a feel it real.

(19:09):
All of these things that Itotally resonate with.
Let's get a little bitgranular here because I know a lot
of the.
This is a definitely a newerconcept for a lot of the community
and maybe a little bit furtherout than everybody listen or a lot
of people listening may haveever reached, especially in the communities
we're in.
So for everybody listening,first of all, I would implore you

(19:33):
remember, your mind is like a parachute.
It only works if it's open.
So intentionally be openminded about this episode.
Because there are so manythings that, you know, growing up,
we're just told, we'll dealwith it, get over it, but we don't
realize that they're affectingus in ways that we don't even perceive.

(19:53):
So, Stephanie, I'd love to.
You know, we're talking aboutlimiting beliefs.
We're talking about the thingsthat hold us back.
When you work with these 1percenters and the top, you know,
say, the people in Facebookand all of the founders and different
people that you've workedwith, or really anybody that you've
worked with, what are some of.
Can you give us maybe a shortlist of some of the things that maybe

(20:14):
have affected people in lifethat hold them back to get us down
this path of starting to thinkalong the lines of, what are we really
looking for?
What is it that holds us backin life?
What are these identitystealers, these thieves of identity
and of our belief systems.
Yeah.
So when I've worked with a lotof these, what are perceived to be

(20:35):
very successful people.
Right.
I think in our society, welook at success as, what have you
achieved?
How much money do you have?
What status do you have?
To me, that's not alwayssuccess, but when I'm working with
these particular folks, that'show they're perceived.
And yet when you get under thehood, you realize what's been driving
them, a lot of them, is thatsomething occurred to them in their

(20:57):
past that was highlyundesirable, AKA traumatic, and they
might have formed a belief orcreated some sort of coping mechanism
to then avoid the pain thatthey experienced from that trauma.
As an example, I had a clientwho was very, very, very successful.

(21:20):
He sold a company for $60 million.
And he said, in the end, whydid feeling good last for five minutes?
And now I feel like crap, likeit didn't mean anything.
And then he's on to the nextthing that he needs to achieve.
Now.
It's like, whoa, can't youjust relax for a second?
Just, you know, sold yourcompany for $60 million.

(21:42):
But, yeah, it's not enough.
It's not, what's the next?
What's the next?
Yes.
And when we were able to pullback the layers, there was a session
we had where he was sharingabout his childhood and how highly
traumatized he was by both ofhis parents and then was bullied
and it slipped out of his mouth.

(22:03):
But he goes, yeah, and mymantra is, prove them wrong.
And did it.
And he kept talking.
I'm like, whoa, let's rewind.
Prove them wrong.
That's what was driving him tobuild this company to prove people
wrong.
Not because it was somethinghe was excited about, not something
that he felt was going to bedeeply fulfilling.
It was as a reaction to notfeel the pain of the people who bullied

(22:26):
him, said he was never goingto amount to anything.
And it was like, prove them wrong.
So he like drove himself intothe ground to build an incredible
organization that he was ableto for a lot of money.
But in the end, it was notfulfilling because what it was being
fueled by was to avoid painversus he was doing it out of a place

(22:49):
of pleasure.
Like, I want to create thismore of I want to stop feeling like
an idiot, or that people don'tlike me, or that I'm never going
to amount to anything, orpeople can make fun of me.
And this is going to be thereason why they can't do that anymore
because I built somethinggreat, right?
Oh, you know what?
We see this so often, man,especially in, in the, in home services
and in trades.

(23:10):
I mean, we've all seen thosememes fly around with grind, grind
culture.
And it's like, what is it?
Work hard, grow, you know,grind until your haters bring you
their job application.
See, so it's as a way to provesomething, whether to prove you're
enough to prove that you'reworth something to prove.

(23:31):
And that's what I actuallyreally found with a lot of those
clients or as a child theywere indoctrinated into working hard.
And that means you'll be successful.
And yet if you work till you.
Park your Lamborghini on their lawn.
Yeah, but if you don't feelworthy of having what it is you desire,
you can work in circles andstill never achieve that.

(23:54):
Right.
As an example, when we talkabout how we play to our beliefs,
there was a study that wasdone that I found really fascinating.
It was this tennis coach, andhe would run this tennis camp every
summer for kids.
And he said day one, firstthing he would say is, all right,
all the slow kids come to theleft, all the fast kids go to the

(24:16):
right.
Oh, God, I'm banging my headagainst the wall right now thinking
about that statement, right?
And these kids would self select.
The ones who actually sawthemselves as fast, they went to
the right side and the oneswho saw themselves as slow went to
the left.

(24:36):
He didn't tell you which onewho's slow and who's fast.
He just said, there's whereyou go if that's what you believe
about yourself.
Right?
So then he tested their Speed.
At the start of the camp, thekids who had decided that they were
slower were actually onaverage faster than the kids who

(24:59):
thought they were fast.
Oh, wow.
But by the end of the camp,when he tested their speed again,
the kids who decided that theywere slow actually started to lower
in their performance.
And the kids who believe thatthey were fast started to increase.
And so they actually becamethe very thing they believed.

(25:19):
Wow.
Incredible.
And achieved that, right?
Yeah.
No one told it.
There was this invisible forcethat was happening which is your
belief.
And so it's, you know, ifyou're on these call sales calls
and you don't believe you'reworthy of the sale, or hitting, you
know, hitting your numbersthat you set out for, or achieving
X amount of dollars in yourbank account, you can be sitting

(25:41):
there dialing all day long,having tons and like doing well on
your sales calls, or you mightunconsciously sabotage the call.
Right.
And it could be very nuanced,very subtle, but that's what's occurring.
It's just like these kids whodecided they were slow, they believed
they were slow, they went tothe slow side, they became slow or

(26:04):
over time, wow.
You know, I've seen that happen.
One of the things I do when Itrain is I do ride alongs with technicians
and salespeople in the field.
And I see it happen in real time.
You know, things will be goingincredible and they're, you know,
implementing what we've been training.
And sure enough, the buyingsigns start to happen from the homeowners

(26:25):
and all of a sudden their,their whole demeanor changes and
they start talking way out ofturn or over talking or over explaining
and the nerves hit and they,they talk right past the cell and
end up with a, oh, well, we'vegot to think about it.
And then they wonder why.
And so I see this in real time.

(26:46):
So, man, I would love for youto help spark some thought process
for the listeners.
Could you give us a few otherexamples of what some of those limiting
beliefs could be that maybethat they've developed along the
way and then we can shift intosome more of what do we do about

(27:08):
it.
That's what everybody'swanting to know.
It's like, okay, I know I'vegot problems.
How do I fix them?
Yeah, so I know a lot of likecore wound beliefs are simply, I'm
unlovable, I don't belong, I'munworthy, I'm not enough.
And so then the behaviorsbecome trying to prove that they're

(27:28):
not that.
But if you believe that,you're going to become that or keep
getting results in those ways.
There's a lot of folks that Iwould say, like even, I'm sure most
of your salespeople are men.
Is that correct?
That listen a good amount.
Yeah.
I'm a huge advocate for, weneed more women in the trades and

(27:50):
of course I do everything thatI possibly can to support that.
However, right.
Right now we're sitting atprobably 90, 92% are men in the,
in sales and home services.
Yeah.
Great.
So I, I only say that becauseI, I mean I know both men and women,
but like a lot of women reallystruggle with receiving.

(28:13):
There's actually a lot of menthat are that way too.
And I can tell simply when Iencounter somebody and I compliment
them or acknowledge them,their whole demeanor gets contracted
or they'll deflect or they'llgive me a compliment back right after
I gave it to them.
They can't just let it landand receive it.
There's this awkwardness thatoccurs and I'm like, oh, they struggle

(28:36):
with receiving.
Well, if that's a big thing, alimitation, a block that you, you
know, have, it's going to bedifficult to receive more clients,
more money, more, whichobviously is driven through more
sales.
Right.
And so again you just keepplaying at the level of what you
believe.
You hit that set point andthen once you hit that set point,

(28:57):
you start to sabotage like youmentioned during your ride alongs
of what you witnessed.
And so I would say that likethat is a huge one if we're really
just staying in the line oflike sales right now.
If people struggle, strugglewith I, I'm not worthy or I'm not
deserving of what I want orit's not possible to have X.

(29:18):
That's going to be the corebeliefs that have people struggle
to achieve what they want whenit comes on to the business side.
Right, Absolutely.
And then of course byextension this goes into, you know,
people that have struggledwith their fitness and nutrition.
They'll make progress,progress and then go back or they
will keep wondering why theyend up with that same person in their

(29:40):
lives that they can't makerelationships work.
Or my mind just is spinning inall the different elements of our
lives that you know, are soimportant but also so related how
we self sabotage those thingsand don't even realize it sometimes.
Yeah.
And it's very subtle and it'sunconscious and that's why it's so
important to really beginlooking at your life, at yourself,

(30:02):
at what you consistentlythink, which will then Tell you to
what you believe, right?
A belief is just a thoughtthat's thought over and over and
over again until it's reallyrooted in.
Or if you were in a, you know,open receptive state, like when you
were a kid, you wereessentially in a hypnotic state,
meaning you were ready toaccept and believe and adopt whatever
you were told.

(30:23):
Right.
If you were a baby, and Idon't know if people can see this
right now, I'm holding up myphone, but if someone said to you,
this is a cup, you're notgoing to go, oh, it's not.
That's a problem.
You have nothing to go off of.
If your parents said, you'restupid, you're never going to amount
to anything.
The way to create success isthrough hard work.
Money doesn't grow on trees.

(30:44):
Rich people are evil.
There's so much that you mighthear that then when you start to
believe it because you're inthat open receptive state, you're
like, oh, this is how theworld is.
This is how I am.
And a lot of times peopledon't take the time to challenge
those beliefs.
Is this really mine?
So I'm going to start movinginto the what you can do about it

(31:07):
part.
And it's like, number one,start paying attention to your reactions.
Notice moments when you feeltriggered or you're defensive, or
when you're avoiding takingaction even when you want to, or
you dismiss possibilities withthoughts like, that's not for me.
I can never do that.
These emotional reactions,they often reveal the subconscious

(31:30):
beliefs at play.
If you want to know what youbelieve too, look at your life.
It's a reflection of it.
Look inside of your bank account.
Look at the quality of your relationships.
Look at how your health is, right?
Pay attention to your home environment.
What does that say about you?
These are all going to revealthings about your unconscious.

(31:52):
And another way is listen toyour dialogue, right?
Start writing down reoccurringthoughts, especially the ones that
start with like, I can't orI'm not the kind of person who can,
or that's just how I am right now.
You're co signing on your limitations.
Yeah, no joke that there's away out.

(32:14):
These statements, you know,they're often beliefs, they're not
actually facts about you,which is a good thing because you
can shift them.
And I want to go back, and Ihave a few more things I want to
share, but I want to go backto that, that receiving piece.
You know, it's interestingbecause I, my, my husband's mother
And Father, they're.

(32:34):
They're very Christian.
And I was.
I went to a Christian schoolwhen I was a child.
And I remember in the Bible,it was like, it's better to give
than it is to receive.
Even from religion, you'rebeing indoctrinated.
Oh, give, but don't receive.
So that's why people mightstruggle with that.
But when I actually reframethat in a way that was much more

(32:56):
empowering, it's like, oh,it's better to be in the position
to be able to give than it isto need to receive.
Much better.
Wow.
What does that mean?
That means, oh, it's better tobe able to give because you're an
overflow.
You're in a position to helpothers more.

(33:16):
To me, that is a betterinterpretation of that versus an
oh, it's better just to givethan don't receive me to be in a
position where you can givethan to have to receive.
Oh, my gosh.
That's.
This is something that Iactually train about a lot during
my sessions is, you know,because there's a handful of sections

(33:40):
in any appointment, we have totake a minute to introduce ourselves
and give some accolades.
So people need to know whothey're talking to and set some credibility
flags.
And this comes up almost everysingle time, especially when I train
across the South.
That whole concept, of course,this would be a whole nother episode,
but it creates this unnatural,very gross sense of false humility

(34:04):
that we feel like we have tohave to push.
Because I grew up very, very,very similar.
It sounds like.
And I remember so often, andfor everybody listening, if you've
ever said something like, whensomeone gives you a compliment, oh,
it wasn't me.
It was all God.
Well, okay, but you did the work.

(34:26):
Take credit and receive the compliment.
For faith without works is dead.
That you did the work part of it.
And so I feel like there's this.
This underlying thing thatjust says, that was my limiting belief
for a long time.
Was that me, too?
And it was really hard becausewhen people would try to offer me

(34:46):
things, give me things, I waslike, no, I have to work for it.
Instead of being open andreceptive, why can't building businesses,
selling things be easy and funversus this hard work?
But we've been indoctrinatingto believing.
And so, you know, moving alongthe thread too, of, like, how do

(35:08):
I uncover this?
In addition to what I sharedwith you earlier, start to also examine
areas where you feel stuck.
Ask yourself, where do I keephitting the same wall?
You know, what Goals have Ibeen avoiding or have I been unconsciously
sabotaging?
What do I secretly believeabout success or money or love or

(35:29):
myself?
Right.
Stuckness often points to aninner belief creating resistance.
And then you can also usereflective prompts.
So try journaling on promptslike, if I were a hundred percent
honest, what do I believe isnot possible for me?
Yeah.

(35:51):
What do I fear would happen ifI fully succeeded?
What belief might be keepingme safe, small or hidden?
And then really just start topay attention and notice those patterns
across time.
Look at, as I mentionedbefore, look at your relationship
patterns.
Look at your career ceilings.
Look at the emotional cyclesthat you're stuck in.

(36:12):
So a lot of this is reallyjust about starting to pay attention
to yourself instead of tryingto do and get to the next thing,
which I think is part of theindoctrination of our culture as
well.
Right.
Earlier, we value hustleculture, yet hustle culture never
feels fulfilling.
No way.
And a lot of times hustleculture is built on trauma.

(36:34):
Right?
It's like, if I don't achievesomething, then I'm not worth anything,
and then what?
Right?
So I'm just keep achieving,achieving, achieving.
What's the next thing?
I got to keep going on thishamster wheel and never stop.
And I.
That occurred for me a lot oftimes when I would slow down and
just relax.
It felt so uncomfortable in mynervous system because I'm like,

(36:55):
oh, I'm not going to be worthanything anymore.
Now, of course, I'm notthinking that consciously, but there's
some unconscious discomfortbecause the belief that I had to
unearth was my achievementequals my success.
Success equals who I am, whichequals, you know, my worth.
Oh, gosh.
Well, now I gotta just keepdoing the dang thing in order to

(37:19):
keep achieving, achieving inorder to be worthy, in order to have
happiness.
And it was exhausting.
Oh, my gosh.
No doubt.
I. I went through this recently.
In fact, it's.
This is a constant struggle of mine.
I.
Everybody, everyone that Iknow that knows me and what I'm.
Everything I'm doing in business.
Somebody, the other day, hewas, we were just catching up and

(37:39):
I listed.
He was like, oh, what all yougot going right now?
And I listed everything.
He's like, holy crap, man.
You've got six differentbusinesses running.
Yep.
And I was like, oh, well,because if I feel like if I'm not
constantly creating somethingnew, then I'm not succeeding.
And I know that's not healthy.

(38:00):
And so, I mean, sounds likeyou've got a new client here.
But this is truly thestruggle, especially for top performers
and achievers and, you know,people who are so.
Everyone in this communitythat listens, they are, you know,
we're all striving to be that1% better today than we were yesterday.

(38:20):
You know, and if we canconstantly grow and become better
people, become someone worthbuying from is the slogan of the
show.
That means constantlyimproving these things in our life,
which is sometimescounterintuitive, sometimes it doesn't
mean doing more.
Sometimes it means resting andreally sinking into exactly what
we're talking about.

(38:41):
Yeah, no, I think that'sreally important to one, examine
yourself, examine yourthoughts, your beliefs, examine your
behaviors and go, is this whoI really want to be?
This is how I want to live my life.
Because we do have.
I know it sounds cliche, butit is one precious life that we've

(39:03):
been blessed with.
What are we going to do with it?
Are we going to do it lifewhere at the end of the day when
we take our last breath, like,gosh, I'm so glad I worked so hard.
I'm so glad she's so much.
No one cares.
Why do you so much care aboutthat versus at the end of the day

(39:23):
like one.
A beautiful practice that it'squite scary for some people to do,
but I highly recommend is towrite your own eulogy now.
Right.
I'm sure you've heard of thatpractice, Sam, because I know you've
done so much deep work.
But if you write that it's,it's then going to really put into
perspective what's importantfor you.
What do you want people to besaying about you at the end of the

(39:46):
day?
And what do you want your lifeto be reflected to be in the time
that you were alive in thismeat suit of a physical body.
Right.
And then work it backwardsbecause I think right now we're like
chasing for something that wedon't even know if we want or if
that's how we want to live inthis lifetime.

(40:07):
Right.
But eulogy will kind of have.
It's a really beautiful selfreflective exercise to go is the
way that I'm living right nowis what I'm believing, is what I'm
thinking, is what I'm, what's,you know, I'm achieving or again,
how I'm acting in alignmentwith who I actually want to be or
the impact that I really wantto make on this world.

(40:29):
And if it's not aligned, thenthere's some beautiful inner work
to do to get realigned toStart shooting certain behaviors
to start doing in a life bydesign that's intentional instead
of reactive from.
Again, the beliefs that we'veadopted as a child, that's still

(40:51):
running us right now.
Wow.
That is incredible.
It's funny that you mentionedthat, because when I have a business
partner, Tim, when we work atthe company level, we always meet
with the owners ahead of time.
And in order to really helpthem get clarity around the core

(41:14):
beliefs and the values for thecompany, we ask them this question.
We're like, okay, and we listsix different people.
Okay, six different people aregoing to speak at your funeral.
What is one word that theywould say about you?
And then, of course, thedifferent people are a family member,
an employee, maybe a subcontractor.
You know, just severaldifferent people.

(41:35):
And I love this exercise somuch because it gives us clarity
of who we want to.
Who.
Who we think we are and who wewant to be.
And what's the distancebetween those two things?
Oh, yeah.
I love that so much.
Thank you.
I'm going to do a wholeepisode on that.
I'm going to take peoplethrough that exercise.
We'll just workshop it, butcarry on.

(41:58):
This is such a good conversation.
I feel like we could do awhole miniseries on this.
Yeah.
I mean, look, I just thinkit's important if you feel like you're
stuck, you're struggling,you're not fulfilled, build.
It's time to really look internally.
I mean, that's my big message here.
I, for a long time avoided itbecause it feels scary.

(42:19):
It feels like hard work.
It feels like, oof.
If I dig back in there, Idon't know if I'm gonna like what
I see.
Yeah.
And yet, ultimately, I thinkwhat we're here to do is to grow
and evolve.
And we're provided peopleexperiences and things in life to
show us where we're not freeinside and where we can grow and

(42:42):
evolve into.
It's just a matter of will youanswer the call, yeah, yeah.
Or will you keep your.
Yeah.
Keep your head in the sand andgo, ah.
Or work yourself into theground going.
I don't know why it's notworking, why I'm not making the sales.
Why am I getting more no's and yeses?
Why am I not hitting my numbers?
Why am I?

(43:03):
I could tell you why.
This whole episode has beentelling you why.
Right.
You gotta look internally andliterally rewire those beliefs that
are limiting you, that areholding you back, that are not allowing
you to be fully free, to betruly liberated, to make the Choices,
the decisions, the actions,the behaviors that you actually want

(43:24):
in this lifetime.
I see so many people held backor making up stories for why they
can't or why I don't have X,Y, Z.
And it's like you're actuallya limitless being who can create
and have and be whatever youwant, but it's going to require something

(43:46):
of you.
Right.
That's the initiation is it'snot going to be the easiest path,
but it will be the mostrewarding and fulfilling path.
So good.
So good.
So for, for everyone who'slistening that, that this has really
resonated with and reallystruck a chord, what are maybe a

(44:08):
couple steps they can take?
You know, start with writingtheir own eulogy, but then what are
some actual steps to takeafter that?
Yeah.
So as I mentioned, are allthose ways to begin really observing
how you're being held back?
Right, yeah.
Noticing those statements andthe limiting beliefs.
Dialogue, examine where youfeel stuck, use those reflective

(44:28):
prompts, notice the patternsetc because for a long time, just
pulling my example, I, Iwouldn't do it until I burnt out
twice.
Those are moments to go,hello, pay attention.
The way you're going about itis not sustainable.
Oh okay.
Because if you don't actuallystart doing the work too, I feel

(44:51):
like you're going to get hitwith circumstances or experiences
that force you to look wordsand so instead of hitting that point,
just start doing those moreself awareness pieces to pay attention
and then there's many paths ofhow do I start to rewire and clean
this up?
You know I'm going to talkabout rapid rewrite just because

(45:13):
that's my deep.
Absolutely.
Give us, give us everythingabout it.
Love to hear more about it andof course definitely want to give
you opportunity to leteverybody know where they can get
more of your content and how,how to get in touch with you and,
and, and that as well.
Yeah.
And and so you know, with ourtools that we use is really starting
to find out, well, what's the problem?

(45:36):
What's the limitation?
Once you start becoming awareand paying attention to yourself,
your thoughts, your behaviors,your beliefs.
Right.
Mm.
And then going, hmm, what canI do to really begin reworking, working
and rewiring this before Italk about rapid Ur, there's again
a lot of modalities out there,but find the ones that really work
with the subconscious becauseas I mentioned, the conscious level

(45:59):
work just keeps you spinningall the time or just takes a really
long time because you're notactually getting to where the root
cause is.
And you're just like surfacelevel trimming the weeds instead
of pulling the root out.
Got it?
Yes.
Yeah.
And with our tools, what Ilove about it is they're simple,
they're in a proven framework,and you can just follow steps to

(46:19):
begin clearing.
We don't normally give stuffaway, but I will give you two, two
resources for now.
The first is if you want toexperience one of our tools and be
guided through it, you can goto our website, Rapid Rewire method
dot com.
Sam.
I can also give you a linkwhere people just go directly to.

(46:39):
Absolutely.
And get it in the show notes.
Yeah.
They can download a freeexperience demo where you'll be guided
through one of our tools toliterally work through something
that you're stuck orstruggling with.
Okay.
And then the other piece, I'mgoing to literally give you a tool
right now that you can use.
This is more of a shallowprotocol, meaning it's going to clean

(46:59):
up some stuff, but it's notalways going to get to root cause.
However, I've seen some prettyincredible results from people using
this tool to overcomesomething that they've been stuck
or struggling with.
But what this tool does is itreally starts to integrate the emotional
charge that you have around something.
So as an example, let's say ifyou're a new salesperson, you're,

(47:21):
like, afraid to ask for the sale.
Right.
Every time you go, there'ssome emotional reaction that comes
up and is almost thisinvisible force going, no.
And it pulls you back down.
It's funny you mentioned thisso super quick.
My backstory is, for the firsttwo years, two solid years of my

(47:43):
sales career, I could notforce myself to ask for the sell.
It was like a gut punch, butterflies.
It would get to that place, Iwould set the paper down and go.
And I couldn't get the words out.
Two solid years.
And so I deeply resonate withthat example.
For sure.

(48:03):
Yeah, there you go.
So.
So let's say that might be you.
Right.
All you have to do is wealways start our processes collecting
four bits of information.
So what's the problem?
You just named it.
Right.
Every time I go to ask for thesale, I clam up, I close down.
Great.
Put your attention to that problem.

(48:24):
What's the emotional reactionthat comes up?
It could be insecure, worry, anxiousness.
Make sure it's an actual emotion.
So if you need to go on to theinterwebs and go tell, give me an
emotion wheel, it'll pop upand you can start to look and see
what are literal emotions.
Because you don't want to saysomething like oh, whenever I try

(48:46):
to go for this sale, you know,and I, I, my body shuts down, literally.
And then when you put yourattention to that problem, what's
the emotion?
You can't say or how does thathave you feel?
Bad.
Good.
Okay, fine, those are not emotion.
So make sure it's an actual emotion.
Correct label.
Correct label.
Yeah.
Once you have that, then justkind of close your eyes, let it come

(49:08):
up, the emotion go.
How intense is do I feel this?
Let's say anxiousness.
Right.
Scale of 1 to 10.
One is, doesn't bother me at all.
10 is, it's debilitating,cannot function, full shut down abortion.
Right, Exactly.
Hopefully that's not you, butmaybe you toggle like the 6, 7 range.

(49:30):
It could be 4, but you justneed to know that intensity number
to see if you're makingprogress with the process.
And then in the end, how doyou actually want to feel instead?
So when I go to ask for thesale, instead of feeling anxiousness,
how do I want to feel instead?
Could be confident, calm, selfassured, whatever that might be.

(49:51):
Great.
Notate that down and then justclose your eyes.
Maybe think of the last timethat problem arose.
So maybe the last time you hadto go ask for the sale and you clammed
up and couldn't do it.
Let that emotion ofanxiousness come up and as you're
experiencing that anxiousness,you're going to toggle between two

(50:12):
prompts.
That's it.
Until both discharge out.
The first prompt is tellyourself something bad about the
anxiousness.
So not about the problem, notabout asking for the sale, because
you can go on and on and onabout stories about that, but it's
like feeling that anxiousness,you want to experience it.

(50:33):
Tell yourself somethingnegative or bad about the anxiousness
and it could be, it just, itstops me from being as successful
as I want in my career.
Great.
Feeling that anxiousness.
Tell yourself something goodor positive about the anxiousness.
Again, about the emotion.

(50:53):
It's trying to protect me fromsaying something dumb.
Thank you.
Okay, still feeling the anxiousness.
Tell yourself something bad ornegative about the anxiousness.
It's feels really weird in my body.
It has me feel like I don'thave control over my, you know, limbs

(51:13):
or my nervous system.
You then feeling the anxiousness.
Tell your something selfsomething good or positive about
the anxiousness.
And all you do is you toggleback and forth, giving yourself quick
responses.
Don't overthink it.
It's just the first comes toMind, say it.
And be as radically honestwith yourself when you're asking
yourself these prompts.

(51:34):
So it's like, what's bad aboutthe anxiousness?
What's good?
What's bad?
What's good about the emotion?
Usually one of them will dumpout first.
So it's usually the positive.
If it's a negative emotion.
So you might say, okay, you'vegone back and forth several times
and you're like, okay, what?
Tell yourself something elsethat's negative or positive or good
about the anxiousness.

(51:55):
Nothing left.
Okay, well, what's negative inabout the anxiousness?
What's left?
Things.
Then go back to the positive.
Still nothing.
Go back to the negative.
Now it's nothing.
Oh, when you've dumped outwhere there's literally no more responses
on both, check back in.
Where's that anxiousness?

(52:18):
That's weird.
I don't feel it anymore.
Ah, go ask for the sale.
That's.
I can ask for the sale.
And I don't feel this weirdemotion coming up.
Ask for it.
And I feel calm.
In fact, I might feelconfident to ask for it.
That's weird.

(52:39):
But, yes, you're now free.
You're no longer held back by that.
You are now able to go do thething that you wanted to do with
confidence, with ease, withfreedom, with joy even.
And that's how you start toliberate yourself from.
My gosh, that was incrediblefor everybody listening.

(52:59):
And thank you so much forthat, Stephanie.
That was for everybody listening.
That was a masterclass inclearing those things that are holding
you back.
And clearly that's justscratching the surface.
But I can think of a hundreddifferent ways right now on the top
of my head that that couldapply and things like I will immediately
be using it for.
So clarifying question around that.

(53:21):
Is it better to, you know,when you're doing that, are we saying
these things out loud?
Are these just thoughts in our head?
What.
What does that look like?
That's actually a really good question.
I should have said thatbecause that's part of the instructions
is, yes, you want to vocalizethis out loud to yourself.
So when you're in the emotionyou don't have, you know, you can
say, okay, I'm going to tellmyself some.
Or like, what's.
Tell myself something negativeabout it.

(53:42):
You could just go, what'snegative is this.
But you want to vocalize yourresponses enough so you can hear
it.
You don't have to shout it.
If there's someone else in theroom, you could say it quietly.
But it's so good to do that,to vocalize it, because it helps
to actually duplicate thecontent, to release it and let it
go, which is what you'rewanting to do.
Once you get good at this,friends, it's so fun.

(54:04):
You could be in your car.
You could be about to hop ontoa sales call.
Just do it right before youcould be at a party, I had a friend.
I was at a party.
I was sitting on the couch.
He plops down next to me, andhe goes, I'm effing angry right now.
Can you help me?
And I was like, yep.
And all I did was this processon his anger.

(54:26):
And the next thing you know,it only took seven minutes.
He was really fast to process.
Don't give up on yourself.
If you've got a lot of contentto dump, just keep going.
Don't go.
It's been 15.
Just keep going.
Trust me, it will work.
But by the end, he.
It only took him seven minutes.
And then he ran out of contenton both sides.
And I said, where's the anger?
And he says, clear.

(54:48):
And he bolted back into theparty, and he was fine.
And it never came back for himto have that level of anger around
the circumstance thatinitially triggered that.
And so know that this justworks on emotional charge.
So if you're feeling, youknow, fear or doubt or insecurity
or judgmentalness orworthlessness, powerless, worry,

(55:12):
shame, what.
You can use this to actuallyjust diminish the emotional charge
so that you can get back to functioning.
That's the goal of thisparticular tool that I just gave
you.
But, yeah, saying it,vocalizing it out loud, you could
do it anytime, anywhere.
It'll.
The more you do it too, themore you be like, oh, wow, I just
dumped that out quick.
I don't.
It'll work faster and faster,but that's the process.

(55:36):
Beautiful.
Beautiful.
Thank you for that.
So much.
So for everybody listening,make sure you do that.
I'll get this into the shownotes too.
I'll line it out for everybodybecause most people are in Drive
Time University right now, sodon't be doing that.
You can absolutely do this.
Driving down the road.
Don't stop to write it down, though.
Be safe.
Keep your hands on the wheel.

(55:58):
It'll be in the show notes.
People want to get in contactwith you, want to learn more, want
to deep dive a lot deeper.
Where.
Where can we find your content?
How can we get in touch to gothrough some of this with you?
You can find us on our website.
Rapid rewire method dot Com.
I said that slow because it'ssuch a tongue twister that I screw

(56:19):
it up when I say it fast.
If you have questions aboutanything, you can always email our
support email.
We have somebody there torespond back to be able to map be
matched up with one of ourcertified coaches if you want to
learn.
They're simple tools so wetrain people on them.
Like right now I literallyjust trained you on how to use a

(56:40):
tool that now you can useanytime, anywhere with yourself or
anyone.
Right.
I feel like that's reallywhere the power lies.
You don't need to rely onsomeone externally to help you because
you're panicking at 2 in the morning.
Who are you gonna call?
You're there with yourself though.
And now you have tools to, tobe able to help yourself whenever

(57:02):
you need to.
So that's what we're about istrue empowerment.
So we train people on these tools.
But if you wanted to work withan actual practitioner, shoot us
anemail@supportapidrewiremethod.com and
we'll pair you up with one ofour, our coaches and you can also
find us on, you know, social media.
Rapid rewire method.
Rapid rewire method.

(57:24):
This has been such a great conversation.
It's sadly time to land this plane.
I wish that we could go on fora lot longer but man, this has been
awesome.
I appreciate you being on theshow today and thanks for the tools.
I know a lot of people willreally get some big benefit anytime
I have an episode that's alittle bit more out of the box like

(57:44):
this one is that, man, thefeedback that we get is always really
incredible.
So super appreciate it andanything I can do to help you along
the way, help grow yourbusiness, help, help spread the word.
I am here for you.
This is work that absolutelyneeds to be done globally.
And so I'm.
You've got a supporter in thiscorner, that's for sure.

(58:08):
And you've got a supporterover here too.
I think that's how we met.
It is, it is, yeah.
Well, so for everybody outthere, find yourself a mastermind
to get into.
If you don't know what amastermind is, message me, me.
I'm happy to walk you throughwhat that is and help you find one
that may be a good fit for you.
But when the power of like,like minded people that are focused

(58:29):
on positivity come together,so incredible things happen.
So any last words or partingremarks that you'd like to leave
everyone with before we signoff here?
Yeah, you're already enoughyou're okay.
You got this.
Like, literally, I thinkeverything that we desire to be,
be, come and to have isalready within us.

(58:49):
It's just a matter of beingable to unlock it.
And that's what doing thatinterior work is about.
So, Sam, I really love your show.
I love what you're about.
I love the generosity that youhave to really help people to become
better humans and to, youknow, be more ser.

(59:10):
Like, heart led, service oriented.
Because I feel like that'swhat the world world needs.
Not more slick sales people orsales tactics, but people who genuinely
have a heart to serve and knowthat the sale is service, that they're
really helping somebody byasking for the sale and converting
it.
So bravo to you.
Thank you very much.

(59:31):
I appreciate that.
And for everybody that'slistening, make sure to share this
episode because I know even ifthey're not in home services or the
trades, I know they're peoplein your life that could get a lot
of value from this episode.
So make sure to share it with them.
And also, if you got somevalue from this episode, leave us
a review.

(59:51):
You can find us on Google.
Just Google.
Close It Now.
Go to the Apple podcasts.
Spotify is actually opening upsome more ways to leave reviews there
as well.
And if you're on YouTube, makesure to hit like and subscribe.
That way you get notified whenmore episodes pop up.
And for everybody out there,you know how we do this.
You go be someone worth buying from.

(01:00:16):
You've been listening to theClose it now podcast.
Our passion is to diveheadfirst into the transformative
movement that's reshaping thevery foundation of H VAC and home
improvement and at the sametime covering fitness, nutrition,
relationships and personalgrowth, proving that we can indeed
have it all.

(01:00:36):
We hope you've enjoyed the show.
If you did, make sure to,like, rate and review.
We'll be back soon, but in themeantime, find the website@closeitnow.net
find us on Instagramherealcloseitnow and on Facebook
closeitnow.
See you next time.

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Unlocking the Inner Game: Rewiring Your Beliefs to Sell with Confidence and Lead with Purpose