May 14, 2026 • 7 mins
Is it harmless… or a lie that’s bound to explode? In this hilarious and slightly questionable Dirty Little Secret, one husband admits he’s been keeping something from his wife and it all comes down to what’s really in his drink. After his wife started keeping tabs on how many beers he was having each week, she encouraged him to cut back. Instead of quitting, he got creative. His solution?
He ordered fake soda can covers online slipping them over his beers so they look like Dr. Pepper or Sprite. Now, every night, he’s sitting back like everything’s normal… while secretly keeping his “habit” alive under the disguise of soda.
Billy the Kidd, Candice Lopez, and Producer Pooh react with disbelief and laughter, breaking down:
Is this a harmless workaround… or a lie waiting to blow up?
Don’t forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who would definitely notice… or not notice at all.
He ordered fake soda can covers online slipping them over his beers so they look like Dr. Pepper or Sprite. Now, every night, he’s sitting back like everything’s normal… while secretly keeping his “habit” alive under the disguise of soda.
Billy the Kidd, Candice Lopez, and Producer Pooh react with disbelief and laughter, breaking down:
- Whether this is harmless or a major trust issue
- If this is genius problem‑solving… or just sneaky behavior
- And how long something like this could realistically stay hidden
Is this a harmless workaround… or a lie waiting to blow up?
Don’t forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who would definitely notice… or not notice at all.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is dirty little secret.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
I got your chance at one thousand dollars coming up next.
I'm mixed one or two point nine. The things I
have to deal with behind the scenes. What you should
have heard what Canna said literally ten seconds before you
go on the air, because we're wearing flip flops tomorrow.
Because we were talking about how it's a big ich
if men wear flip flops, and I was like, let's
see how it feels somehow who and I'll wear them?
And then Canna says to me, let's go ahead and
(00:25):
say what you said to me to say seconds before
he went on the air. You were talking about how
some men's feet are nice and some probably aren't.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
And I was just like, I.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Hadn't seen your feet in a while, but I remember
what they looked like because you had a pinky toenail
that was weird.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Or something it was missing or painted off or right,
you know what?
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Not right?
Speaker 1 (00:44):
You know you're so mean. No, I'm not trying to
be mean.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Why are you attacking my toes? I wasn't hang on.
You said, my feet have changed over the years and.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
That's why we all changed. Candice, Well, I know, but I.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Hadn't That's why I thought, well, I haven't seen your
feet and probably fit teen years.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Why would I see your feet? I don't know. Why
wouldn't you.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
We've been buy at a pool together some You've never
looked at my feet.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
We've been at the pool in years. I haven't been
barefoot near No. It socks on you, just socks. You
feel like we don't even know each other. We went
on a Disney cruise and I didn't see your feet.
Yeah you didn't look. No, we didn't go to the
beach together.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
And real quick about my pinky toe. It's something I'm
very insecure about. Matter of fact, I'm gonna go on
Amazon today and I'm buying one of those little toe covers.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
If you have a.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Wonky toe, yeah you know, well you could put the
toe cover over it and makes it look normal. You
could even match your skin tone. Wow, because wow, because
I don't have a pinky nail.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
It's not that big. It's not that big. It's a
tiny tone pink. It's a tiny toenail.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Well, yeah, okay, you your pinky to therapy.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
You know what you need? New feet?
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Doctor Chrisky who your feet literally look like cadaver fee
feet look like you've been walking in Walmart barefoot for
three months.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
They look like dead people, feel Are we sure want
to do this tomorrow?
Speaker 2 (02:13):
You know they have teeth whitening. Do they have toenail
because your toenails are a different shade.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
No, they're not that bad player. Come on now, we'll
get them pettied up. You know that. Hey, you know what,
there's not enough paint. There's not enough manual labor today
that he needn't get one. I'm not doing it. I
haven't had a pedicure. What do you know, I haven't
had a pedicure in years. Just get a get a
leap press on and just put it. Know what that is,
(02:41):
the fact that you know what it is is alarming.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
So tomorrow no pedicures were coming in flip flops, no manicuring.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
It is what it is.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
It is.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Yeah, okay, you promise, I'm not gonna do that pinky toe. Promise.
I had to do it with canvas because yours shut up.
Dirty little secret is on.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
If you got one eight three three seven eight seven
one o two nine, it doesn't matter what secret is.
Maybe it's the fact that you're whatever your toenail's gone.
You have a tiny toenail. Can just can't stop laughing
about this. It's so funny to me. Reminds me that
song Tini Dnswer only tiny toenail. Sir, you have a
dirty little secret. It's a is it a good one?
Speaker 1 (03:23):
What is it?
Speaker 3 (03:23):
It's actually a funny secret. Okay, it's actually funny, is it?
And I'm keeping it from my wife?
Speaker 1 (03:27):
So okay, a funny secret. I don't know if she'll
think this is funny, but that's okay, go.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
Ahead, No, no, no, she won't she, you know, lady,
she's just been on me about my my drinking. And
when I mean drinking, I'm not, you know, I'm not.
I'm not. I'm not cleaning up and closing the bar down. Okay,
I'm not. I'm not that guy.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Okay, however, you know, I just I just be.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Having long days and I just want to fruit bruise.
You know how they say, Okay, see you have a
few beers after work.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
She doesn't like that.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
Yeah, And it's it's it's almost like where she's almost
counting them, you know.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
So at the end of the.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
Week she's like, oh, you had fifteen, Oh I'm sorry,
seventeen beers this week, honey, it's like what we like.
Come on.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
So she's on to you because she's saying, I mean,
I guess she's right.
Speaker 1 (04:15):
If you have a few beers every night, yeah, it
adds up, It does that up. But I don't do that.
I know a lot of guys do though, a lot
of guys have to work to have a beer. I don't.
I don't do that. Pooh does that. He's a Lockwood
distillery and has a few beers, a beer, maybe a drink.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
Yeah, beer, drink whatever. But you do it every night.
She said stop it. So you obviously were like, hell, no,
I'll never stop. No.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
I'm sure you didn't.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
Say that, you know. Of course I put my foot down.
I said, look, I'm a grown man.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
So you said, you're not gonna stop drinking.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
In every other so way of a word, Yeah, without
getting on the couch every night.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
Okay, what's the what's the secret? I'm nervous, right.
Speaker 3 (04:54):
So I went on Amazon, you know how you're googling stuff, man,
and I found uh like covers, you know, like Doctor
Pepper seven up. You know, it goes right over the can.
It's like a beer cozy almost.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
Okay, but it says doctor Pepper.
Speaker 3 (05:10):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's it, says sprite, Doctor Pepper. And
I'm gonna say you right now, it's the best thing
I ever purchased. I mean, I couldn't wait for it
to come in the mill.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
So wait.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
So she okay, I have seen these because people I
see people do this sometimes it's sporting events or whatever.
She slide the cover over the beer can and it
looks like a doctor Pepper.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Can now you with me?
Speaker 3 (05:33):
Me no way, so she.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Liten.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
I feel like I'm working for the CIA. This is
the whole operation, and I'm keeping it going.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
Baby. So she thinks you're just slamming doctor Pepper.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
Oh yeah, She's like, oh honey, I love how you
just you know, you're you're cutting back, You're doing this.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
I don't know it's worse a Doctor Pepper or beer,
but either way, that's hysterical.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
I'm surprised she doesn't smell it. Yeah, that's a good point.
She doesn't smell it. I would.
Speaker 3 (06:05):
No, I'm a married man. I'm not getting action every
day like we're kids. So it's it's not like he's
coming over smelling my friend.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Just by talking to you close. I think that's funny.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
So she doesn't even get close enough to you to
smell you.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
Listen, he gets content over there on her thigh. Her
cow has her own little palk.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
I'm in my own little recliner.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Mary's life sounds all. Is this what married life is like?
It really is, Cannise. I mean, wow, day to day,
day to day, meaning like there's something.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
I have a kid, So yeah, I know, so right,
But I'm saying so you might never get close and
smooth up on Eric.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
No.
Speaker 1 (06:45):
I always am close enough to him to smell if
he's been drinking. Yeah, well cannas, is you gonna know?
Speaker 3 (06:54):
Yeah, Letten, Letten, everybody win, he wins.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
I went all right, so you're gonna keep doing it.
She's like, oh, this guy's doctor. Now it's gonna be like, honey,
you're drinking too many doctor peppers.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
We need to check your insulin. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
The only person to know is the damn dog.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
This guy gets so happy drinking doctor peppers. God, he's
on a sugar high. He's stumbling. All right, Well, you
know what, that's an innocent secret. It's nothing too crazy.
But there you go.
Speaker 1 (07:25):
You'll be fine, all right, she'll be fine. No, but
if she finds out, you won't be
This is dirty little secret.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
I got your chance at one thousand dollars coming up next.
I'm mixed one or two point nine. The things I
have to deal with behind the scenes. What you should
have heard what Canna said literally ten seconds before you
go on the air, because we're wearing flip flops tomorrow.
Because we were talking about how it's a big ich
if men wear flip flops, and I was like, let's
see how it feels somehow who and I'll wear them?
And then Canna says to me, let's go ahead and
(00:25):
say what you said to me to say seconds before
he went on the air. You were talking about how
some men's feet are nice and some probably aren't.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
And I was just like, I.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Hadn't seen your feet in a while, but I remember
what they looked like because you had a pinky toenail
that was weird.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Or something it was missing or painted off or right,
you know what?
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Not right?
Speaker 1 (00:44):
You know you're so mean. No, I'm not trying to
be mean.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Why are you attacking my toes? I wasn't hang on.
You said, my feet have changed over the years and.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
That's why we all changed. Candice, Well, I know, but I.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Hadn't That's why I thought, well, I haven't seen your
feet and probably fit teen years.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Why would I see your feet? I don't know. Why
wouldn't you.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
We've been buy at a pool together some You've never
looked at my feet.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
We've been at the pool in years. I haven't been
barefoot near No. It socks on you, just socks. You
feel like we don't even know each other. We went
on a Disney cruise and I didn't see your feet.
Yeah you didn't look. No, we didn't go to the
beach together.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
And real quick about my pinky toe. It's something I'm
very insecure about. Matter of fact, I'm gonna go on
Amazon today and I'm buying one of those little toe covers.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
If you have a.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Wonky toe, yeah you know, well you could put the
toe cover over it and makes it look normal. You
could even match your skin tone. Wow, because wow, because
I don't have a pinky nail.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
It's not that big. It's not that big. It's a
tiny tone pink. It's a tiny toenail.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Well, yeah, okay, you your pinky to therapy.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
You know what you need? New feet?
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Doctor Chrisky who your feet literally look like cadaver fee
feet look like you've been walking in Walmart barefoot for
three months.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
They look like dead people, feel Are we sure want
to do this tomorrow?
Speaker 2 (02:13):
You know they have teeth whitening. Do they have toenail
because your toenails are a different shade.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
No, they're not that bad player. Come on now, we'll
get them pettied up. You know that. Hey, you know what,
there's not enough paint. There's not enough manual labor today
that he needn't get one. I'm not doing it. I
haven't had a pedicure. What do you know, I haven't
had a pedicure in years. Just get a get a
leap press on and just put it. Know what that is,
(02:41):
the fact that you know what it is is alarming.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
So tomorrow no pedicures were coming in flip flops, no manicuring.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
It is what it is.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
It is.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Yeah, okay, you promise, I'm not gonna do that pinky toe. Promise.
I had to do it with canvas because yours shut up.
Dirty little secret is on.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
If you got one eight three three seven eight seven
one o two nine, it doesn't matter what secret is.
Maybe it's the fact that you're whatever your toenail's gone.
You have a tiny toenail. Can just can't stop laughing
about this. It's so funny to me. Reminds me that
song Tini Dnswer only tiny toenail. Sir, you have a
dirty little secret. It's a is it a good one?
Speaker 1 (03:23):
What is it?
Speaker 3 (03:23):
It's actually a funny secret. Okay, it's actually funny, is it?
And I'm keeping it from my wife?
Speaker 1 (03:27):
So okay, a funny secret. I don't know if she'll
think this is funny, but that's okay, go.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
Ahead, No, no, no, she won't she, you know, lady,
she's just been on me about my my drinking. And
when I mean drinking, I'm not, you know, I'm not.
I'm not. I'm not cleaning up and closing the bar down. Okay,
I'm not. I'm not that guy.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Okay, however, you know, I just I just be.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Having long days and I just want to fruit bruise.
You know how they say, Okay, see you have a
few beers after work.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
She doesn't like that.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
Yeah, And it's it's it's almost like where she's almost
counting them, you know.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
So at the end of the.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
Week she's like, oh, you had fifteen, Oh I'm sorry,
seventeen beers this week, honey, it's like what we like.
Come on.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
So she's on to you because she's saying, I mean,
I guess she's right.
Speaker 1 (04:15):
If you have a few beers every night, yeah, it
adds up, It does that up. But I don't do that.
I know a lot of guys do though, a lot
of guys have to work to have a beer. I don't.
I don't do that. Pooh does that. He's a Lockwood
distillery and has a few beers, a beer, maybe a drink.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
Yeah, beer, drink whatever. But you do it every night.
She said stop it. So you obviously were like, hell, no,
I'll never stop. No.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
I'm sure you didn't.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
Say that, you know. Of course I put my foot down.
I said, look, I'm a grown man.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
So you said, you're not gonna stop drinking.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
In every other so way of a word, Yeah, without
getting on the couch every night.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
Okay, what's the what's the secret? I'm nervous, right.
Speaker 3 (04:54):
So I went on Amazon, you know how you're googling stuff, man,
and I found uh like covers, you know, like Doctor
Pepper seven up. You know, it goes right over the can.
It's like a beer cozy almost.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
Okay, but it says doctor Pepper.
Speaker 3 (05:10):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's it, says sprite, Doctor Pepper. And
I'm gonna say you right now, it's the best thing
I ever purchased. I mean, I couldn't wait for it
to come in the mill.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
So wait.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
So she okay, I have seen these because people I
see people do this sometimes it's sporting events or whatever.
She slide the cover over the beer can and it
looks like a doctor Pepper.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Can now you with me?
Speaker 3 (05:33):
Me no way, so she.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Liten.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
I feel like I'm working for the CIA. This is
the whole operation, and I'm keeping it going.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
Baby. So she thinks you're just slamming doctor Pepper.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
Oh yeah, She's like, oh honey, I love how you
just you know, you're you're cutting back, You're doing this.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
I don't know it's worse a Doctor Pepper or beer,
but either way, that's hysterical.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
I'm surprised she doesn't smell it. Yeah, that's a good point.
She doesn't smell it. I would.
Speaker 3 (06:05):
No, I'm a married man. I'm not getting action every
day like we're kids. So it's it's not like he's
coming over smelling my friend.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Just by talking to you close. I think that's funny.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
So she doesn't even get close enough to you to
smell you.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
Listen, he gets content over there on her thigh. Her
cow has her own little palk.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
I'm in my own little recliner.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Mary's life sounds all. Is this what married life is like?
It really is, Cannise. I mean, wow, day to day,
day to day, meaning like there's something.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
I have a kid, So yeah, I know, so right,
But I'm saying so you might never get close and
smooth up on Eric.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
No.
Speaker 1 (06:45):
I always am close enough to him to smell if
he's been drinking. Yeah, well cannas, is you gonna know?
Speaker 3 (06:54):
Yeah, Letten, Letten, everybody win, he wins.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
I went all right, so you're gonna keep doing it.
She's like, oh, this guy's doctor. Now it's gonna be like, honey,
you're drinking too many doctor peppers.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
We need to check your insulin. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
The only person to know is the damn dog.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
This guy gets so happy drinking doctor peppers. God, he's
on a sugar high. He's stumbling. All right, Well, you
know what, that's an innocent secret. It's nothing too crazy.
But there you go.
Speaker 1 (07:25):
You'll be fine, all right, she'll be fine. No, but
if she finds out, you won't be
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