July 8, 2026 • 8 mins
Guest is Christopher Parent, is the author of Fragments of a Decent Man and his writing has appeared in Across the Margin, Dappled Things, The Good Men Project, and Points in Case. Chris earned undergraduate and law degrees from the University of Notre Dame and a master’s degree from the Elliott School of International Affairs. Prior to attending law school, he was a journalist, defense analyst and speechwriter. He has served as Chief Trademark Counsel for several Fortune 500 companies. Chris was born and raised in Fairfield, Connecticut, and is devoted to his wife, Melissa, and two daughters, Mimi and Sophie. They have lived in Denver, Seattle, Manhattan, and Zurich, Switzerland but currently call New Hampshire home.
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
This is iHeart Cincy. I'm Sandy Collins. My guest today
has written a book about what it means to be
a father. Christopher Parent is here. He just puts his
book out earlier this year and is wanted to talk
about this issue of what does it take to be
a good father in twenty twenty six. So Christopher, welcome
(00:22):
to the show. We're glad that you are here today.
And what gave you the impetus for this book?
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Well, thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
This just kind of came to fruition over time writing
some essays. They were published in literary journals. I was
been a writer of my entire life as a journalist
and speech writer, and as these stories came to be published,
I was getting a lot of feedback from different folks.
They resonated with a lot of different people, especially talking
(00:50):
about vulnerability and humility and respect for others, decency, things
that I think is somewhat at a lost art in
today's society. And so I just set out to write
stories about people I met along the way who have
helped me grow as a person and some of the
lessons I've learned. And again, I think it focuses on
(01:11):
vulnerability and humility and some of the things that we
can bring to today's world to make a little bit
better place.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
So what are your bottom line thoughts about what does
it actually take to be a good dad or a
good band in today's world.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
Well, I do as I say, not as I do.
I do the best I catch sure, and I'm sure
my kids would have object to some of those things.
But and I'm not. You know, this is not a
self help book. They're eighteen stories.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
I think, really, you know, it comes down to authenticity
and honesty and truth.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
I think those are the keys.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
We tend to shield ourselves from showing the world our vulnerability,
and we don't accept failure in some ways. And if
you go on social media, you would look at the
world and think, oh my gosh, everybody's perfect.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
And I think showing our kids these days that it's
okay to feel.
Speaker 3 (02:06):
It's how you pick yourself up, how you become better,
what you learn from those mistakes. You know, failure is
just an opportunity to learn. And I think that's that's
at least the message I've tried to teach with my kids.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Again, I'm not an expert.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
I don't have the answers here, but I think it's
some of the themes that with a lot of people.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
What we've read.
Speaker 3 (02:23):
Scott Galloway's book Notes on Being a Man is very
good and I think I recommend it highly. He takes
a little bit different approach, minor in the form of essays,
but it hits on the same theme that you know, again,
we're striving for perfection today and and failure is okay
to talk about and accept.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
And it doesn't give your kids permission to fail when
and learn from it. Depending on your family situation, the
era that you grew up is really a big part
of how men reacted. My parents were much older, and
my mother very stoic, and my father was a clown
(03:06):
and fun but neither one of them. They were the law.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
That was it.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
There was no IF's hands or butts, and there were
no apologies when they made mistakes. And so I can't
tell you, Chris, how many thousands of hours my siblings
and I spent with our family saying this is what
you said. No, I didn't, Yes, you did, No, you
didn't know you didn't, And they would never say I'm sorry,
you know that's not what I meant. If that's what
(03:31):
you heard, I'm sorry. What I meant was and then
fix it. It was just brick walls. And so it
seems like in the seventies and eighties and nineties parents
were giving a different message, and that is now, my
kids are my friends, and I wanted to be the
cool mom. How does that play into that separation between
(03:52):
being the parent and being the responsible one and then
wanting to be seen as somebody that the kids can
learn from and that are real and vulnerable just like
they are.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Yeah, that's a really good question.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
And that's one of the essays I write about with
my father because I think my father, he was younger,
he was an Vietnam veteran. He passed away about ten
years ago, and I think he struggled with exactly that.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
My mom did.
Speaker 3 (04:17):
Apologize my mom, we'll listen to this and give a
shout out to her. She was very, very progressive. My
dad never admitted his mistakes, and that's not a bad thing,
and I think one of this books is trying to
struggle with that. To answer your question, I think it's
a it's just really tough and you've got to put
on different.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Hats from different times.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
We tried to be a coach, a mentor a friend
sometimes and I think sometimes we forget. And I worked
for a Japanese company, Nintendo, years ago, and what I
really learned from them was just sometimes you just have
to listen. And I think so many parents just tend
to try to talk and to show off on social
media and just.
Speaker 2 (04:55):
Know that they have the answers. And I think it's
okay for us to.
Speaker 3 (04:58):
Say, you know what, we don't have the answer, but
you know, let's let's try to find the answer. Let's
do this together. I think kids are different these days.
Ours is is you know, I guess more of a
you know is. It is a traditional household in the
sense that you know, we have our kids follow rules,
but it's also a collaborative effort. But I don't think
there's any one formula for any parent to say, Okay,
(05:19):
this is how you have to act. In fact, I
think that's what's so difficult. And I've played a lot
of sports in my life. I've played for just a
fantastic coach, Kevin Corgan from Nordane lacrosse. These been there
thirty eight years, and he says the same thing, like,
no player is the same. Some people need to be
yelled at, some people need to be encouraged in at
(05:40):
different times, and I think that's what people need to do.
And I think if you just have one speed, it
usually doesn't end well.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
The role of fathers in the home has changed so
much in the past fifty sixty seventy years, since you know,
the World War two era and all these different generations
that are here. Do you think that men are at
least modern men, Guys in their thirties, forties, fifties, do
you think that they're more likely to show their emotions
or to be affectionate with their kids. Are they still
(06:11):
getting that message to suppress their emotions and to be
the tough guy.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
Well, again, I'm not a psychiatrist or a psychologist, just
your ideas.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
You know, you're looking into this whole. You're a man,
you're living this, you know, right.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
I got it, And I think you know, my answer
is that there's confusion out there. I think there's confusion
as to what the expectations are. And I think i'd
answer a little bit differently. Just looking at my two girls,
two wonderful daughters, and you know, they have to be
so many different things to so many different people. They
can't push back, they can't argue, they've got to be obedient.
(06:46):
But yet they've got to be smart and successful. I
think men sometimes are just struggling. And again, I think
sometimes it just means to be authentic. It means and
I think that's the most successful men I've met my life.
I had an uncle, Steve, who was a World War
Two pilot, and he was a tough guy and or
kind of curmudgeon, but he was a wonderful human being,
(07:07):
did work in the Kuwanis Club.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
He was very different from my dad.
Speaker 3 (07:10):
My dad was tough, also Vietnam veteran who had a
great sense of humor, and also very different from some
of the softer men. I met David Sarrows, one of
my of just thinking of his name right now. As
an English teacher, I had years ago, very soft man
who taught me poetry. But all of them they shared
the commonality was that they were authentic, They were who
(07:31):
they were.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
You know.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
When my father passed away, one of the things I
thought about when I started trying to process it, was
I could have told him that a little bit more,
and I kind of missed that opportunity and That's why
the book is dedicated to him, to say that, you
know what, thank you for being authentic, and they thank
you for being honest and who.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
You were, because I think that's the biggest takeaway.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
Christopher Parent. He is the author of Fragments of a
Decent Man. It's available now. Thank you so much Christopher
for your book, Fragments of a Decent Man. Where can
we pick it up?
Speaker 3 (08:00):
You're a chrisparent dot net, but it's on Amazon, Barnes,
and Noble. And also encourage bookshop dot org. We should
really support our independent book dealers. Bookshop dot org. Find
out your local bookshop in Cincinnati around the Ohio area
and get it there.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
Hopefully you'll enjoy it.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
Sounds like a good Dad's Day gift. Thank you, Thank
you so much.
Speaker 2 (08:21):
Anny.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
If you missed any of this show, you can hear
it on the iHeartRadio app look under podcasts for iheartsinse
you got any suggestions on shows upcoming or questions, just
email me Iheartsincy at iHeartMedia dot com. Iheartsincy with an
I at iHeartMedia dot com. Until next week. Thanks for listening.
I'm Sandy Collins, iHeart Cincy is a production of iHeartMedia Cincinnati.
This is iHeart Cincy. I'm Sandy Collins. My guest today
has written a book about what it means to be
a father. Christopher Parent is here. He just puts his
book out earlier this year and is wanted to talk
about this issue of what does it take to be
a good father in twenty twenty six. So Christopher, welcome
(00:22):
to the show. We're glad that you are here today.
And what gave you the impetus for this book?
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Well, thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
This just kind of came to fruition over time writing
some essays. They were published in literary journals. I was
been a writer of my entire life as a journalist
and speech writer, and as these stories came to be published,
I was getting a lot of feedback from different folks.
They resonated with a lot of different people, especially talking
(00:50):
about vulnerability and humility and respect for others, decency, things
that I think is somewhat at a lost art in
today's society. And so I just set out to write
stories about people I met along the way who have
helped me grow as a person and some of the
lessons I've learned. And again, I think it focuses on
(01:11):
vulnerability and humility and some of the things that we
can bring to today's world to make a little bit
better place.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
So what are your bottom line thoughts about what does
it actually take to be a good dad or a
good band in today's world.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
Well, I do as I say, not as I do.
I do the best I catch sure, and I'm sure
my kids would have object to some of those things.
But and I'm not. You know, this is not a
self help book. They're eighteen stories.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
I think, really, you know, it comes down to authenticity
and honesty and truth.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
I think those are the keys.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
We tend to shield ourselves from showing the world our vulnerability,
and we don't accept failure in some ways. And if
you go on social media, you would look at the
world and think, oh my gosh, everybody's perfect.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
And I think showing our kids these days that it's
okay to feel.
Speaker 3 (02:06):
It's how you pick yourself up, how you become better,
what you learn from those mistakes. You know, failure is
just an opportunity to learn. And I think that's that's
at least the message I've tried to teach with my kids.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Again, I'm not an expert.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
I don't have the answers here, but I think it's
some of the themes that with a lot of people.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
What we've read.
Speaker 3 (02:23):
Scott Galloway's book Notes on Being a Man is very
good and I think I recommend it highly. He takes
a little bit different approach, minor in the form of essays,
but it hits on the same theme that you know, again,
we're striving for perfection today and and failure is okay
to talk about and accept.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
And it doesn't give your kids permission to fail when
and learn from it. Depending on your family situation, the
era that you grew up is really a big part
of how men reacted. My parents were much older, and
my mother very stoic, and my father was a clown
(03:06):
and fun but neither one of them. They were the law.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
That was it.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
There was no IF's hands or butts, and there were
no apologies when they made mistakes. And so I can't
tell you, Chris, how many thousands of hours my siblings
and I spent with our family saying this is what
you said. No, I didn't, Yes, you did, No, you
didn't know you didn't, And they would never say I'm sorry,
you know that's not what I meant. If that's what
(03:31):
you heard, I'm sorry. What I meant was and then
fix it. It was just brick walls. And so it
seems like in the seventies and eighties and nineties parents
were giving a different message, and that is now, my
kids are my friends, and I wanted to be the
cool mom. How does that play into that separation between
(03:52):
being the parent and being the responsible one and then
wanting to be seen as somebody that the kids can
learn from and that are real and vulnerable just like
they are.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Yeah, that's a really good question.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
And that's one of the essays I write about with
my father because I think my father, he was younger,
he was an Vietnam veteran. He passed away about ten
years ago, and I think he struggled with exactly that.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
My mom did.
Speaker 3 (04:17):
Apologize my mom, we'll listen to this and give a
shout out to her. She was very, very progressive. My
dad never admitted his mistakes, and that's not a bad thing,
and I think one of this books is trying to
struggle with that. To answer your question, I think it's
a it's just really tough and you've got to put
on different.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Hats from different times.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
We tried to be a coach, a mentor a friend
sometimes and I think sometimes we forget. And I worked
for a Japanese company, Nintendo, years ago, and what I
really learned from them was just sometimes you just have
to listen. And I think so many parents just tend
to try to talk and to show off on social
media and just.
Speaker 2 (04:55):
Know that they have the answers. And I think it's
okay for us to.
Speaker 3 (04:58):
Say, you know what, we don't have the answer, but
you know, let's let's try to find the answer. Let's
do this together. I think kids are different these days.
Ours is is you know, I guess more of a
you know is. It is a traditional household in the
sense that you know, we have our kids follow rules,
but it's also a collaborative effort. But I don't think
there's any one formula for any parent to say, Okay,
(05:19):
this is how you have to act. In fact, I
think that's what's so difficult. And I've played a lot
of sports in my life. I've played for just a
fantastic coach, Kevin Corgan from Nordane lacrosse. These been there
thirty eight years, and he says the same thing, like,
no player is the same. Some people need to be
yelled at, some people need to be encouraged in at
(05:40):
different times, and I think that's what people need to do.
And I think if you just have one speed, it
usually doesn't end well.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
The role of fathers in the home has changed so
much in the past fifty sixty seventy years, since you know,
the World War two era and all these different generations
that are here. Do you think that men are at
least modern men, Guys in their thirties, forties, fifties, do
you think that they're more likely to show their emotions
or to be affectionate with their kids. Are they still
(06:11):
getting that message to suppress their emotions and to be
the tough guy.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
Well, again, I'm not a psychiatrist or a psychologist, just
your ideas.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
You know, you're looking into this whole. You're a man,
you're living this, you know, right.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
I got it, And I think you know, my answer
is that there's confusion out there. I think there's confusion
as to what the expectations are. And I think i'd
answer a little bit differently. Just looking at my two girls,
two wonderful daughters, and you know, they have to be
so many different things to so many different people. They
can't push back, they can't argue, they've got to be obedient.
(06:46):
But yet they've got to be smart and successful. I
think men sometimes are just struggling. And again, I think
sometimes it just means to be authentic. It means and
I think that's the most successful men I've met my life.
I had an uncle, Steve, who was a World War
Two pilot, and he was a tough guy and or
kind of curmudgeon, but he was a wonderful human being,
(07:07):
did work in the Kuwanis Club.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
He was very different from my dad.
Speaker 3 (07:10):
My dad was tough, also Vietnam veteran who had a
great sense of humor, and also very different from some
of the softer men. I met David Sarrows, one of
my of just thinking of his name right now. As
an English teacher, I had years ago, very soft man
who taught me poetry. But all of them they shared
the commonality was that they were authentic, They were who
(07:31):
they were.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
You know.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
When my father passed away, one of the things I
thought about when I started trying to process it, was
I could have told him that a little bit more,
and I kind of missed that opportunity and That's why
the book is dedicated to him, to say that, you
know what, thank you for being authentic, and they thank
you for being honest and who.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
You were, because I think that's the biggest takeaway.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
Christopher Parent. He is the author of Fragments of a
Decent Man. It's available now. Thank you so much Christopher
for your book, Fragments of a Decent Man. Where can
we pick it up?
Speaker 3 (08:00):
You're a chrisparent dot net, but it's on Amazon, Barnes,
and Noble. And also encourage bookshop dot org. We should
really support our independent book dealers. Bookshop dot org. Find
out your local bookshop in Cincinnati around the Ohio area
and get it there.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
Hopefully you'll enjoy it.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
Sounds like a good Dad's Day gift. Thank you, Thank
you so much.
Speaker 2 (08:21):
Anny.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
If you missed any of this show, you can hear
it on the iHeartRadio app look under podcasts for iheartsinse
you got any suggestions on shows upcoming or questions, just
email me Iheartsincy at iHeartMedia dot com. Iheartsincy with an
I at iHeartMedia dot com. Until next week. Thanks for listening.
I'm Sandy Collins, iHeart Cincy is a production of iHeartMedia Cincinnati.
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