February 24, 2026 • 32 mins
This week we chat about why doggy style doesn't work when you get older, deep dive into Love Is Blind, Falen's new business plan, Jenny couldn't fit into her jeans this weekend, and more!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi, Hi.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
We did we talk about being in a new studio
last week?
Speaker 1 (00:05):
I actually don't know that we did. We We've I've posted,
have you posted? I've posted about like the crazy construction
going on in our building. I haven't colt and I've
complained aired our grievances over the lack of vending machines
on our radio show. But in case you don't listen
to that, they there are like no walls left. And
so the studio we always did our podcast in has
been gutted. It will be turned into offices of some sort.
(00:28):
So we are in a different studio than we've ever
recorded in last week, in this week.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
So we're just constantly checking to make sure that, like
the levels of our voices are good. But I did
take a picture of what that old studio looks like now,
and I was going to use it to promote this
tomorrow when we post perfect, because I'll be like, okay,
this is literally where we used to rest and.
Speaker 1 (00:48):
Peace mes we And also in here, my microphone is wild.
If I move it a milli like meter, it pops
up into the air. So it's wild. It's you never
know what is going to happen, is all I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
So anyways, hopefully the audio's good, but I'm sure someone
will let us know if it isn't.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
I think it's no one's anything last week, so I
think we were We're all good there. Last week's episode
was chaotic. I know, I like it.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
I was going to go back and listen to it
at one point, and I just like, haven't had the
time yet.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
But I do plan on it.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Because the first like fifteen minutes, I don't think, Oh
I do. I want to just get into this email
right away? Okay, okay, because I know I'm gonna have
to find it. But Janita is someone who's like kind
of become a character on the Minnesota Goodbye podcast that
The Dave Ryan showed us. She does her little Janita's
rants and not little. I don't mean to diminish them, Janita,
(01:42):
if you're listening, which I hope you are, But she
didn't know that we had a podcast. So I get
this email from her.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Great name by the way, it's my grandma's name.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
Oh, Jannita's the best. She goes, Okay, what the fuck?
Why am I just finding out about you and Falance podcast.
I don't know you follow us on social media.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
We post every week. She goes, I was looking for some.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
New stuff to listen to while I'm working, and I
came across your guys podcast. Y'all are fucking hilarious.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Looh, thank you.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
I love the energy between the both of you, and
the content is awesome. I was listening to you guys
talk about today's episode about doing it doggy style. Well,
now both of you are younger than me, but let
me tell you, after fifty doggie style ain't fucking fun
at all. Just imagine trying to get it on and
I hear my husband back there moaning and groaning, and
(02:30):
I'm making the same fucking noises. You would think it's
because it must be really good. Nope, it's because our
knees are in so much pain.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
I told them one.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
Night, fuck this, I'm flipping back around.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Lol. You know what you gotta do that when time,
you got to take charge. But this is not it.
My kniees can't handle it.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
So she just said, so you all enjoy it now
because in another fifteen years or so, it ain't gonna
be fun. I'm glad I found your podcast.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
I love it. You still do it that way when
you just don't do it on the hands and knee.
Just bend over something, you know, then neither of you
are on your knees. You still could like enjoy that.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
She's gonna have some remark for that. Let me tell
you why that doesn't work either.
Speaker 1 (03:05):
Yeah, that's fair, that is fair. I don't know. We
also were like we had to dive into love is
blind a little bit. Yes, Okay, Now I might not
be as far along as you though, so I'm all
the way. But Jake goes, how in the hell did
you get through all this? And I go because I
skipped the pods. I posted it last night in my stories.
I said, I'm sorry I used to not, but Minnesota
(03:28):
was so effing boring in the pods and they spent
way too long. And then everyone's like, people in Minnesota
are boring. No, we're not the producers f us. Okay,
everyone knows the good juicy drama happens once they're in
the real world, once you can see the people you
didn't pick, once alcohol is involved, once you're forced to
live together, that is when the good juicy drama comes
(03:51):
to be. So I'm gonna be honest with you. Cult
is on vacation. So Friday, I was in the studio
by myself, and I basically I skipped all of the pods,
went straight to when they are going on their vacation,
they're seeing each other. I didn't even watch them see
each other after. I don't watch any of that. And
someone's like, don't you feel like you miss something?
Speaker 2 (04:14):
If?
Speaker 1 (04:14):
No, Because Netflix, if there's something scandalous that happens, they'll
post it as a clip, So if that were to happen,
I would go back and look. But I didn't notice that,
So I just the only reason I was lured in
was because of a clip they posted of the short
guy who's the villain this season. So I go and
(04:34):
start watching it and I get into it, and I
get home and I'm sitting on the couch. I'm trying
to explain to Jake what's going on, and there's a
new episode out and I didn't realize that he's watching it.
I had no idea it was a new one. I
thought he was catching up. He's like no, and I
was like, oh, and I go. I didn't want to
say it, but like you kind of look the villain
and he goes, are you fucking kidding me, and so
(04:55):
I go here it is, he goes, oh my god,
I do and then the guy and then it says,
you know what they do under them, and he goes,
of course he's in software sales, which is what Jake does.
So then Jake's like, oh so then I just I
didn't even watch the show anymore. This guy kept drinking
and talking and getting worse and worse, and Jake it,
I was just watching Jake just steam coming out of
(05:17):
his ear. She's like, oh my god, oh my god.
This guy, he's like, I hate him. He's like he's me,
but he's like I was like, don't worry, You're not
an awful person. Obviously, obviously I think Jake's much more attractive.
But another thing, I just I loved all the comments
because so if you haven't been watching, and I don't
want to ruin anything for you, Jenny, but I think
he's seen the clip I point.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
I might not have, but I don't care. I've only
made it toiler. I'm not even through the pods yet.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
So the okay spoiler spoiler spoiler short guy picks the
female doctor or she picks him. They get okay when
they get out they are still good, like I don't
think he's an awful person, yet he's like saying she's beautiful,
Like everything seems to be going well when they meet
up with the other couples. He does. But then here's
(06:03):
what happens. I think. So then they go and they
get out of honeymoon phase. They get out of the
apartment that the people, and then now they get to
see their actual houses. They go to his apartment. He
has like a nice apartment, it's nothing wrong with it.
But she's a doctor. So then they go to her
house and she has a four bedroom, beautiful home. And
I swear everything changed after that. And I mean, so
(06:28):
then after that, I think he kind of disappears for
a couple of days, and I don't know what's going on.
I think he's being sketchy. They get together and he's
like out of nowhere. I'm sorry, I gotta be honest
with you, like I'm just used to a girl who
like goes to FOLCA. He just he says, he constantly
says this, I like CrossFit or pilate's every single day.
And she's like looking at him and she's like, are
(06:48):
you saying, like my body doesn't look good or whatever.
He's like, well, I'm just saying like I'm just like
used to a certain look, and she's like, right, but
like I never in the pods ever even implied. I
actually said the opposite, like I don't work out every day,
and she's just sitting there looking dumb. Found it because
mind you, I shouldn't have to say this, but she
(07:09):
is not like a large woman or she's a very
thin person. Does she have a six pack?
Speaker 2 (07:15):
No?
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Okay, very few people do. Actually, So then he starts like,
I mean I guess, like you know, my mind is
just wondering, like how it would be if I would
pick someone else. And she's like and he's like, but
I want to keep doing this. She's like, well, I
don't like you basically just made me so insecure. She's like,
I'm sorry, I'm not working out every day. I'm in
the hospital every day. And it's wild. So and then
(07:38):
all the comments were like this motherfucker coming in at
five three. I was having the audacity. And also everyone's
like he saw her house and he has a little
man syndrome like that, he's not as successful as her.
It's what it actually comes down to. And then he's
hitting on another girl that he didn't pick that's quote
unquote more his type. And then Jake was getting annoyed
(07:58):
by that because he's like, why is this other girl
allowing him to? And I was like, I think the
other girl's allowing him to because she's probably not as
into her guy as she should be, and so she's
loving the attention she's getting. And it's like, it's not
I didn't think that was copeaceetic. I thought that was
like messed up also, that she was just like taking
it in. But yeah, he is gnarly and he is like, yeah,
(08:23):
he's this year's villain this season, so I and there
are other villains by the way, but he's so bad
he makes the other guys who aren't that great look
even worse.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
So I just had started watching it yesterday and I
was I do watch the Pods, but like kind of
half watch.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
It, you know.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Yeah, So I'm only through I'm through most of I
think the Pods stuff. I think I'm getting close to
being done. But the guy I'm seeing, he came over
and it's on, and he literally felt so uncomfortable. At
one point, I think at one of the meetings or
something that he like walked out of the room because
he like could have watched the TV. He was like,
I don't like this. This is so cringey. So I
(08:59):
made him sit his ass back down and I said, no,
we're gonna watch this. And then I told him about
how the one guy that's the quote unquote villain that
I had heard about looks like Jake. And I was
so happy you still had that story up of you
going back and forth and then him saying, oh soft
for a sales And I showed him that and he
thought it was so fun.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
We were laughing so hard. But I did get him hooked.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
We watched like a couple episodes last night, but now
I'm annoyed I got him hooked because now he's like, well,
you have to wait to watch it with me, and
I'm like, you can.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
Each watch it your own apartment. Also, I also fast
forward through the weddings bs and get straight to where
the I do or not.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
I think I did that at the last season too,
because I was like.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
I've been way too long. I don't they do. And
it's always actually care about seeing you get ready with
your family and friends. I don't need all your personal
shut up, get to it.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Ley, This is kind of random, but it's not sort
of not completely so. The person I'm seeing he was
at a wedding and this past weekend he told me.
The first thing that the bride's dad said for his
speech was all right, well, I'm gonna just like address
the elephant in the room. You might recognize me as
(10:14):
the guy from season eight of so and so reality show,
and they don't remember what the show was that he
was on, But the motherfucker started his speech to talk
about his wonderful daughter getting married, finding the lover of life,
talking about himself being on a reality TV show.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
That's so funny? Do you know that eighteen his wedding,
I made the joke that I'm going to be like, yes,
it is me Fallin from KATIEWB And she's like, no,
please do that, and I was like, there is no
chance I will make a moment of your wedding about me,
even if you think it's funny. I'm not doing that.
I thought you were gonna say, Okay, So, one other
guy I do not like on this season is the
(10:52):
soccer coach guy.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
Okay, I played soccer, Okay, okay, the one who played
soccer and got an injury. Oh yeah, he I think
after meeting his girl or seeing their meet, I was like,
I don't like him anymore.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
He keeps over and over again, basically bringing up that
he's normally drawn to women with dark features and he
picked a beautiful, thin blonde woe. Yeah right, she's so
beautiful one. Don't think it's about her size. Like he
meets it, he sees another girl from his past and
he's like, you can see he's just immediately more into
her because she has all the dark features. Yeah, but
like I almost died. They're sitting at the table, Jenny,
(11:29):
Oh my god. I don't know how these men exist
in the real world. He's like, I got an offer
for a soccer coach job and I'm sorry, I am
not trying to minimize the coaching jobs okay, but he's
not coaching like the Vikings okay. And he's like, I
mean you knew, I was no mad, Like I need
to know that you're trying to move your job and
she's like, I mean, yeah, I said I will. Like
(11:51):
I'm going to ask my boss tomorrow if I can relocate.
He's like, I just like don't want to miss this opportunity,
and I am dying. I'm like, bro, she has an
actual job and you're trying to make her feel like
her job needs to change so you can go coach.
I'm sorry, what do coaches make?
Speaker 2 (12:07):
And is it a professional soccer team? I don't either
a fucking high school I don't call it a.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
Team, but I'm imagining this guy is getting an offer
for fifty to sixty thousand dollars and making her feel
and that is not even the worst part of it.
She's then like, why aren't you having sex with me? Basically?
And he has the audacity like, well, I mean I
don't like when you get you pregnant. She's like, I'm
on my period. You can't get pregnant when you're on
your period. And he's like, well, I don't know, like
(12:33):
I thought it wasn't like right after. She's like it's
like two weeks after, and he's like, well, you know,
I'm just like maybe like if we get like a
She's like, I have tracked my period, like I'm very
good at tracking my period. She's like I do not
want a kid either, and he's like, well, I just
like She's like no, no, no, I feel like you you
act like I'm trying to trap you, Like I'm trying
to trap you on Ohio from taking this coaching job.
(12:55):
I'm trying to trap you with a kid. Trust me,
I am not trying to get pregnant. I do not
and like and he's like, well, maybe we can get
like a like a tracker we're on together. She's like, no, no,
I can track my own period and let you know
if i'm on it and when I'm ovulating. And I'm like,
this guy, why she's like, And I'm like, she's begging
(13:16):
to have sex. And then she he's like, doesn't want
to have sex when she's on her period. And I'm like, okay,
I get sometimes you don't, Like a lot of women
don't want to when they're on their period. But a
little bit about me, in the beginning of like a relationship,
when you're super horny and like all you kind of
look past the period usually in the beginning, and then
(13:36):
like maybe you later get into that or something, you
have that discussion if you really want to or not
depends on your mood that day. I don't know. I
just the fact that she's like, so, I'm like, you
can't touch me because I'm on my period. It was
just very bizarre. These relationships are so bizarre. They are.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
I mean, of course we're like sitting there making fun
of every interaction and stuff like things that everyone's saying.
But I did look over at him and I go,
I mean, don't you think our first date probably went
pretty similar to how these interactions are going? Like I
was like just being fair, like we were awkward to
(14:15):
an extent. You know, you don't know anything about another person,
and so it's like you you are not I don't
care what anyone says. You are never fully yourself when
you meet someone for the first time. And I'm still
not even after dating this person for a while. I'm
still not fully myself like personality wise, yes, but I
definitely hide certain things that are disgusting about me.
Speaker 1 (14:38):
I don't know, Jenny, if I hid anything from Jake
after the first like two weeks. I do think everything
was officially out.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
Which shows that you, like, really built a relationship that
you felt comfortable with quickly with him. And I'm not
saying that that's not how mine is.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
I just am, well, yeah, I'm not ever relationship is
There have been other relationships before that I think were
good that I was in maybe that I just didn't
I don't know. I think Jake is also just his
family and stuff. They're all just so open in an
accepting way that I don't know. I just it's I
feel like, I don't know what it is, and it
(15:18):
felt very comfortable. I didn't fart in front of him
for like a couple of weeks. But then when we
had the conversation and he just said that he would
burn hole through his car when he left my house
every morning. Just He's like, I don't know. It was
a company car. He's like, I'm surprised I didn't have
to just total it because he was like ripping ass
through the seats on the way home. And that is
a visual I can't get right up. And it made
(15:40):
me laugh and I was like, yeah, could you hold
it in in the beginning? Usually yeah, yeah, you do.
What else is new in your life?
Speaker 2 (15:49):
So we haven't talked a ton about this on the podcast,
but I have mentioned how I've just been dealing with
this crazy injury thing and I do it like a
million times better. But one of the side effects of
set injury is that I've barely been working out, and
I have not changed my eating whatsoever, so that has
not a line.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
And it's like you're a bad eater.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
I mean I'm snacky though, Like I eat a really
great meals and I will go I will be the
epitome of health up until about eight pm. Right something
hits something inside of me in my braking monster, I
do I start eating like chocolate chips, like I just
I have to have my little sweets or something at
that point, or I eat in the middle of the
night or whatever it is. And so everyone whatever, we
(16:34):
all go through like different seasons of life. And this
has been like different in the sense that I can't
work out as much as I used I'm used to. Well,
I want to put on a pair of jeans this weekend.
I don't think I've ever struggled that much to get
into a pair of jeans, not even when I'm like
in a fitting room trying on a side that's probably
too small.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
How recently did they fit you? Probably like a month ago?
Where were they tied on your butt? No, I couldn't
get him over my thighs. And then I do get
them over my thighs, the fucking zipper breaks. Oh no,
that's not that's not what you want to have. No,
Oh god, so I that was a that was a
faulty zipper. It's not because it's not your fault, Jenny, it.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
Is, but it is the kind of jeans that are
like stiff as a mother farmer after you wash them.
But I just bought them last May. Now, granted I
had lost some weight around that time because of depression, honestly,
but like I so, I've gained some of that back.
But now I swear it's like it feels like I've
gained like twenty pounds in a month, and I know
(17:35):
I haven't.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
No, but how are you handling that? Where the genes alow?
Did you have a mental breakdown?
Speaker 2 (17:40):
I didn't have a mental breakdown, but I had to
film all these videos. So now I'm frantically looking for
a pair of gens that don't feel awful. There was
a video of me that we recorded last week where
I was honestly, I looked at myself and I was
pretty self conscious of how I looked like in it.
And I know I'm giving myself the grace from the
fact that I have not been able to live the
(18:02):
lifestyle I'm used to because of this injury. But at
the same time, it's just so fucking annoying to know
that I have to work out as often as I
do to keep just a moderately in shape body, and
that will be the rest of my life. The rest
of my life, I'll.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
Have to do this. I completely understand what you're saying,
and I think that it is because you put in
so much work to like, at some point, you put
in work to lose weight, right or to get physically fit,
if that's where you're at life. I'm talking directly to Jenny,
but also to myself because we both have been through
(18:38):
that and how hard you have to work to get it,
and then within two weeks it feels like you can
lose it. Like I have not been actively doing pilates
pretty much. It I'll go like once a week. It's
not enough to maintain. So I feel like after doing
like one hundred and fifty classes going so regularly that
(19:00):
when I stopped for like two weeks, I lost everything
I built for a year. Is what I felt like.
I did yesterday for the first time. I couldn't even
tell the last one did weightlifting. I did weightlifting yesterday
because Jake did this like build this whole gym, which
I gave him crap about. But I as we get
older as women, we have got to do weightlifting because
our bone density goes down all these things like osteoporosis,
(19:22):
like you, we have got to like build our muscles
and they it's just so important. So I was like,
I need to get back into this. I was benching
the bar and it was difficult. I you know this
about me, Like I used to be pretty strong with weightlifting.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Train with Fallon and our trainer every once in a while,
and Fallan was always stronger than me.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
Well I on certain things, on other things not so much.
We have our different but I was like, I felt
very weak and it made me kind of mad. But
I was also like in the mindset of like, well,
I haven't done this in a long time. But I
also like I know, like I hate that, like you are,
were having those feelings and like it's like looking down
a barrel honestly of like, this is my life for
(20:02):
the rest of my life, if I want to look
the way I feel comfortable.
Speaker 2 (20:06):
Yeah, well it was that, but like I can acknowledge
that I've been eating more I think lately and I
don't know, and I think it's all kind of a
domino effect for me because when I get a workout in,
like early in the morning, the rest of my day
I'm like so good.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
If I put off working out, like, I don't know
how my day will be because it's all about, like
you raise your cortisol levels in the morning, and then
the rest of the day you make better choices because
you've already raised those and so it only goes downhill
from there and you feel better throughout the day and
so you make better choices. In general, I've been a
fucking dumpster lately. Everything that I see in my house
(20:41):
I eat. I'm like, oh, this looks gone. Those looks
I brought in it's in my car still because I
didn't have enough hands to bring it in this morning.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Yeah. I bought one of those giant.
Speaker 2 (20:50):
Like sixty packs of rice crispies from Costco, the ones
I used to like hide from my last partner. I
can never eat one. I have to have two to
three and I finally they are small, But like at midnight,
do I need to be eating like three rice crispy
trees in the middle of the night. I don't know,
do you, Jenny, No, I don't don't, Okay, I don't.
(21:13):
And so I sat there and I was like, I'm
either throwing these out, which I would never do because
I would never waste something, I'm giving them to the
person I'm seeing, or I'm bringing them into work. And
so the person I'm seeing also said he would not
be able to control himself. Yeah, so he took a
couple for the road, but like wouldn't take the box.
But I brought them in there in my car and
I'm gonna put them in the sales area for whoever
(21:33):
wants them because I can't stop myself.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
Can I tell you what Colt and I are. We
have a business plan that you could be a part of. Okay,
I'm in Okay. Maybe since there is no longer a
vending machine here, we've committed to getting a little mini
fridge and like kind of like when you'd have like
the honor system with a Venmo and like have our
own little snacks and people will know about it and
(21:57):
they can buy them, but like for a charge, like
we buy the bulk for like of Dorito's and like
diet coke, and like one other thing maybe it's rice
Krispy treatz. We have them in like a little cupboard.
We let rumors get around. There's a venmo with pricing.
There's a camera, so you can't be a like sneaky link. Okay,
And basically we're running a school fundraiser program, making just
(22:20):
a little side cash, but also bringing people the joy
that they are missing in their lives from not having
the vending machine. Your thoughts, okay, brilliant idea. I haven't
talked a cult about you being a part of this,
and I don't think he's gonna like that being spread
three ways, so I would like to be I would
like you to know that one day I'm going to
do a game on our show, a bit called Who's
cheaper Cult or Jenny? And I do surprisingly think it's Jenny,
(22:45):
but in different ways. Things that Jenny will do cult
would rather die than do. But you two are probably
the most frugal. That's the nicer way of saying cheap
people I have ever met in my life. So my
fear at the beginning as you started pitching this was
the fact that you would trust anyone in this building
(23:06):
to actually pay for these snacks when everyone is a
freeloader and have a hammer. I'm gonna bring that's results MONITORINGZ.
Speaker 2 (23:12):
Once you brought the camera and I was like, okay,
now we're talking business to yell. Prior to that, I
was like, no fucking chance, we'll be in the hole.
We'll be negative from that. I know, I'll just take
everything for free.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
Everyone. Well, that's why it's like crazy. I genuinely do
think it's crazy. They got rid of the vending machines
and they're not planning on replacing them because we work
in arguably one of the most unhealthy industries. Everyone in here,
I'm sorry, I'm gonna say the word we're mentally fat focks. Okay,
I'm not saying everyone physically is. We are mentally disgusting humans.
(23:44):
We will eat. We'll go in a kitchen. There will
be donuts there that have been there for eight hours,
and there's you can watch people are debating, do I
eat this chicken not let donuts that's more acceptable. Do
you eat this chicken that's been sitting here for eight hours?
That's how despicable we are. So to get rid of
probably the only thing that brought some people in this
building joy anymore, which was for Colt flame and hot Cheetos,
(24:09):
diet Mountain dew for me, a diet Coke's. It feels
like the final the final straw of my sanity. Honestly,
I agree with that. Emily, who is our office manager,
is so sick and tired of hearing about people complain.
She's let me know she's over it, and I think she.
Speaker 2 (24:26):
She has to deal with all of our constantly, That's
what I said building, and Emily is the one that
has to hear it. She is.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
She is the leader of the daycare. And I couldn't
agree more. But she was like, you guys are adult,
you can get food. I'm like, no, yeah, no, because
it's you know, the difference, right, I don't want I'm
not going to buy diet coke because I would never
regularly drink diet coke. That's disgusting, slash. I will buy
(24:55):
one every other day here same like you don't feel
so bad about it a little tree. I don't keep
it in my house. I'm not canimal. No, but now
jakes them buy and diet coke can, so I am, Oh,
he's because Dylan likes him too, And I'm like Dylan,
I don't think you should be drinking these. You're eighteen.
It's not your growth or something. I'm making stuff up.
Speaker 2 (25:15):
I want to revert back to because I didn't know
that Colt was a flaming hot Cheetos girly.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
He is the epitome of white trash. Are you kidding me?
His combo is flaming hot, flaming hot Cheetos with a
diet mountain dew.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
Oh god, the worst soda that's ever existed is diet
mountain dew. So that's disgusting. It's so gross. That's so gross.
But I said it gives him more of a jolt
than diet coke. So people now associate Colt and I
with diet coke. Yep, Colp only pretty much gets a
diet coke if it's his only option or it's given
to him. He gets more of a charge from.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
Diet mountain dew. Now that's crazy. He is wild.
Speaker 2 (25:50):
So I am judging that combination of stuff.
Speaker 1 (25:53):
But if that's your combo, I'm sorry if you felt
offended by me saying it's the white trash combo, but
it is. Yeah, that's sept from someone who's drinking Dike coke.
And they call those refrigerator cigarettes.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
Right. So so I did a van trip two weekends ago,
and I thought I'd go a little bit crazy and
bought some flaming hot Cheetos.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Oh you crazy. Those are so much spicier than I realized.
I can't do them.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
They are pretty spicy, and I can handle them, don't
get me wrong, But you know, like you go in
and you have like the worst cheeto fingers within like
two bites. It like really lingers with the flaming hot.
But I have decided, Remember, I started a list of
things I should not be consuming anymore, chest flaming hot Cheetos.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Got to be on there.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
I was a mess for days because of that. Also
because I ate some undercooked salmon, but that's a different
story for a different times. God, yeah, I just it
was one of those filets where it was so thick
on one side and then like barely anything at these
I baked. Oh this wasn't in the van.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
I was about to be fucking that you were taking salmon.
Oh my god, I know me over my little burner.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
No, no, no, no, this was bags in an oven. But
it was like one of those ones where you know
you got a long piece and the top part is
so thick it's like fucking two inches and the bottom is.
Speaker 1 (27:13):
Barely a centimeter. It's annoying.
Speaker 2 (27:15):
So it's like the thick part got barely cooked. But
I was like, it's fine. I eat sushi. It's different,
n it is different. I learned that when I had
to google what happens when you eat undercos and I
was like, oh, no, faster bait in the van. No,
I never have. I've thought about it, but for some
reason I have. Yeah, for some reason, it doesn't feel right,
(27:39):
like I don't know why, but it feels like because
I'm like in public, you know, like I'm out in
the middle, literally.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Shit in a hole next to it, and you are
concerned that someone will see you inside your van baiting.
All right, I'm not.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
I mean I would never be concerned about that because
I do like cover everything. As soon as I get somewhere,
I make sure my windows are covered. That's like a safety.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
We never even talked about, By the way, sorry, now
that you've already answered, we never even talked about your
creepy run in that you focused on stories.
Speaker 2 (28:08):
I genuinely was like, was I at my head or what?
But I know I wasn't.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
I mean.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Long story short is, I was parked somewhere in the
city of Duluth, and I've parked there before, and I'm
kind of starting to get ready to fall asleep and
I heard like a noise outside. Didn't think much of
it because it is an area where there are like
some houses and stuff, but you can legally park. I
was like, buy a harbor like in front of like water,
and you can legally park there. Overnight, I start to
(28:35):
fall asleep and I hear this, like what sounded like
a snowball being thrown onto my windshield, and I'm like,
at that point, this is what happens every time I
hear a weird noise. I freeze because I'm laying in bed,
and I freeze, and I just listen to everything that's
happening around me to figure out if there's someone like
right outside my van or not, or an animal, which
is what it is if I'm out in the wild wild.
(28:58):
And so I go and I start looking out the
front windows, and then finally I look out the driver's
side and I'm just peeking through like a little bit
so nobody can see. And I hear someone yell hey,
and it scared the shit out of me. And so
when you settle in for the night there's shit everywhere.
(29:18):
You can't drive off just suddenly. A lot of times,
I mean you can in an emergency, yeah, but at
that point I was so scared. I was like, I'm leaving.
And so what I think happened is that so I
use an app called i Overlander too. It helps you
find places to wild camp, and I feel like the
people who live in that area probably know that there's
(29:40):
a pin now on that point that like there's probably
people that wild camp there all the time, and maybe
they just get sick of it and they're nervous if
they have kids that like whatever. I mean, I'm literally
I go in as late as I can, Like I
got in it like probably like nine thirty at the spot,
was gonna leave really early. So I think they probably
just know that it's a wild camping spot and they're
(30:02):
sick of it, is what I kind of felt after
I left this space.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
But I had to drive away.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
At like eleven thirty at night and find a new
place to sleep, which is like whatever, that's what you
deal with with doing wild camping.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
And all that.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
But I've decided now that I'm going to start gate
keeping the places.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
That I find.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
Yeah, and not put it on that app because I
used to like want to be helpful and put spots
out there. But I'm like, I think I'm going to
start gate keeping the spots I find because I don't
want a million people.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
To show up there.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
And then I mean, the spots I find are normally
in the middle of nowhere. It's not in the city.
I usually I rarely do city camping.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
But anyways, yeah, so crazy, it's freaked me out.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
I wouldn't even I woke up and I'm using this
propane heater right now, which before anyone comes at me,
I have a carbon monoxide detector. I know it's not
the best option, but my diesel heater and my electrics
fucked up from this accident, so it was what I have,
but I use that and it ran out, so like
halfway through the night, I had no heat in there,
(31:01):
which was fine, I just had to change the gas
I or the tank. I just like hadn't done yet,
but I ran out, so there's no heat. But I
woke up profusely sweating that night, stripped down to almost nothing.
I think I had just had my sleeping shorts on,
and that was it, because I know I was so
anxious in my sleep that I woke up sweating so
much that night and then just like I don't know
(31:23):
that whole This past weekend was like a reset for
me because that weekend I got barely any sleep. It
was very fun, but I got barely any sleep. So anyways,
we're all good. Nothing bad happened. Just trush your intuition,
is what I always say with things like that. The
moment I feel danger, I leave.
Speaker 1 (31:39):
I'm not even fucking around. It's like I'm out smart.
Well that's that, okay. So Jenny and I are actually
going to be this weekend at the Home of Garden Show.
We should mention that I don't know all the details
other than were there three to five, So if you're there,
come say hi. I know we're hosting Captain Sandy from
Below Deck. She's like doing a stage thing and we'll
(32:02):
be hosting that sometime between three and five. If you're around,
stop buy and say hi. If not, we'll have details
soon on our live podcast and get those to you.
Speaker 2 (32:10):
Yes, thanks, maybe we'll see you then or whatever the
live pot is.
Speaker 1 (32:15):
NYE
Hi, Hi.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
We did we talk about being in a new studio
last week?
Speaker 1 (00:05):
I actually don't know that we did. We We've I've posted,
have you posted? I've posted about like the crazy construction
going on in our building. I haven't colt and I've
complained aired our grievances over the lack of vending machines
on our radio show. But in case you don't listen
to that, they there are like no walls left. And
so the studio we always did our podcast in has
been gutted. It will be turned into offices of some sort.
(00:28):
So we are in a different studio than we've ever
recorded in last week, in this week.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
So we're just constantly checking to make sure that, like
the levels of our voices are good. But I did
take a picture of what that old studio looks like now,
and I was going to use it to promote this
tomorrow when we post perfect, because I'll be like, okay,
this is literally where we used to rest and.
Speaker 1 (00:48):
Peace mes we And also in here, my microphone is wild.
If I move it a milli like meter, it pops
up into the air. So it's wild. It's you never
know what is going to happen, is all I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
So anyways, hopefully the audio's good, but I'm sure someone
will let us know if it isn't.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
I think it's no one's anything last week, so I
think we were We're all good there. Last week's episode
was chaotic. I know, I like it.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
I was going to go back and listen to it
at one point, and I just like, haven't had the
time yet.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
But I do plan on it.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Because the first like fifteen minutes, I don't think, Oh
I do. I want to just get into this email
right away? Okay, okay, because I know I'm gonna have
to find it. But Janita is someone who's like kind
of become a character on the Minnesota Goodbye podcast that
The Dave Ryan showed us. She does her little Janita's
rants and not little. I don't mean to diminish them, Janita,
(01:42):
if you're listening, which I hope you are, But she
didn't know that we had a podcast. So I get
this email from her.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Great name by the way, it's my grandma's name.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
Oh, Jannita's the best. She goes, Okay, what the fuck?
Why am I just finding out about you and Falance podcast.
I don't know you follow us on social media.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
We post every week. She goes, I was looking for some.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
New stuff to listen to while I'm working, and I
came across your guys podcast. Y'all are fucking hilarious.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Looh, thank you.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
I love the energy between the both of you, and
the content is awesome. I was listening to you guys
talk about today's episode about doing it doggy style. Well,
now both of you are younger than me, but let
me tell you, after fifty doggie style ain't fucking fun
at all. Just imagine trying to get it on and
I hear my husband back there moaning and groaning, and
(02:30):
I'm making the same fucking noises. You would think it's
because it must be really good. Nope, it's because our
knees are in so much pain.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
I told them one.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
Night, fuck this, I'm flipping back around.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Lol. You know what you gotta do that when time,
you got to take charge. But this is not it.
My kniees can't handle it.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
So she just said, so you all enjoy it now
because in another fifteen years or so, it ain't gonna
be fun. I'm glad I found your podcast.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
I love it. You still do it that way when
you just don't do it on the hands and knee.
Just bend over something, you know, then neither of you
are on your knees. You still could like enjoy that.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
She's gonna have some remark for that. Let me tell
you why that doesn't work either.
Speaker 1 (03:05):
Yeah, that's fair, that is fair. I don't know. We
also were like we had to dive into love is
blind a little bit. Yes, Okay, Now I might not
be as far along as you though, so I'm all
the way. But Jake goes, how in the hell did
you get through all this? And I go because I
skipped the pods. I posted it last night in my stories.
I said, I'm sorry I used to not, but Minnesota
(03:28):
was so effing boring in the pods and they spent
way too long. And then everyone's like, people in Minnesota
are boring. No, we're not the producers f us. Okay,
everyone knows the good juicy drama happens once they're in
the real world, once you can see the people you
didn't pick, once alcohol is involved, once you're forced to
live together, that is when the good juicy drama comes
(03:51):
to be. So I'm gonna be honest with you. Cult
is on vacation. So Friday, I was in the studio
by myself, and I basically I skipped all of the pods,
went straight to when they are going on their vacation,
they're seeing each other. I didn't even watch them see
each other after. I don't watch any of that. And
someone's like, don't you feel like you miss something?
Speaker 2 (04:14):
If?
Speaker 1 (04:14):
No, Because Netflix, if there's something scandalous that happens, they'll
post it as a clip, So if that were to happen,
I would go back and look. But I didn't notice that,
So I just the only reason I was lured in
was because of a clip they posted of the short
guy who's the villain this season. So I go and
(04:34):
start watching it and I get into it, and I
get home and I'm sitting on the couch. I'm trying
to explain to Jake what's going on, and there's a
new episode out and I didn't realize that he's watching it.
I had no idea it was a new one. I
thought he was catching up. He's like no, and I
was like, oh, and I go. I didn't want to
say it, but like you kind of look the villain
and he goes, are you fucking kidding me, and so
(04:55):
I go here it is, he goes, oh my god,
I do and then the guy and then it says,
you know what they do under them, and he goes,
of course he's in software sales, which is what Jake does.
So then Jake's like, oh so then I just I
didn't even watch the show anymore. This guy kept drinking
and talking and getting worse and worse, and Jake it,
I was just watching Jake just steam coming out of
(05:17):
his ear. She's like, oh my god, oh my god.
This guy, he's like, I hate him. He's like he's me,
but he's like I was like, don't worry, You're not
an awful person. Obviously, obviously I think Jake's much more attractive.
But another thing, I just I loved all the comments
because so if you haven't been watching, and I don't
want to ruin anything for you, Jenny, but I think
he's seen the clip I point.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
I might not have, but I don't care. I've only
made it toiler. I'm not even through the pods yet.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
So the okay spoiler spoiler spoiler short guy picks the
female doctor or she picks him. They get okay when
they get out they are still good, like I don't
think he's an awful person, yet he's like saying she's beautiful,
Like everything seems to be going well when they meet
up with the other couples. He does. But then here's
(06:03):
what happens. I think. So then they go and they
get out of honeymoon phase. They get out of the
apartment that the people, and then now they get to
see their actual houses. They go to his apartment. He
has like a nice apartment, it's nothing wrong with it.
But she's a doctor. So then they go to her
house and she has a four bedroom, beautiful home. And
I swear everything changed after that. And I mean, so
(06:28):
then after that, I think he kind of disappears for
a couple of days, and I don't know what's going on.
I think he's being sketchy. They get together and he's
like out of nowhere. I'm sorry, I gotta be honest
with you, like I'm just used to a girl who
like goes to FOLCA. He just he says, he constantly
says this, I like CrossFit or pilate's every single day.
And she's like looking at him and she's like, are
(06:48):
you saying, like my body doesn't look good or whatever.
He's like, well, I'm just saying like I'm just like
used to a certain look, and she's like, right, but
like I never in the pods ever even implied. I
actually said the opposite, like I don't work out every day,
and she's just sitting there looking dumb. Found it because
mind you, I shouldn't have to say this, but she
(07:09):
is not like a large woman or she's a very
thin person. Does she have a six pack?
Speaker 2 (07:15):
No?
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Okay, very few people do. Actually, So then he starts like,
I mean I guess, like you know, my mind is
just wondering, like how it would be if I would
pick someone else. And she's like and he's like, but
I want to keep doing this. She's like, well, I
don't like you basically just made me so insecure. She's like,
I'm sorry, I'm not working out every day. I'm in
the hospital every day. And it's wild. So and then
(07:38):
all the comments were like this motherfucker coming in at
five three. I was having the audacity. And also everyone's
like he saw her house and he has a little
man syndrome like that, he's not as successful as her.
It's what it actually comes down to. And then he's
hitting on another girl that he didn't pick that's quote
unquote more his type. And then Jake was getting annoyed
(07:58):
by that because he's like, why is this other girl
allowing him to? And I was like, I think the
other girl's allowing him to because she's probably not as
into her guy as she should be, and so she's
loving the attention she's getting. And it's like, it's not
I didn't think that was copeaceetic. I thought that was
like messed up also, that she was just like taking
it in. But yeah, he is gnarly and he is like, yeah,
(08:23):
he's this year's villain this season, so I and there
are other villains by the way, but he's so bad
he makes the other guys who aren't that great look
even worse.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
So I just had started watching it yesterday and I
was I do watch the Pods, but like kind of
half watch.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
It, you know.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Yeah, So I'm only through I'm through most of I
think the Pods stuff. I think I'm getting close to
being done. But the guy I'm seeing, he came over
and it's on, and he literally felt so uncomfortable. At
one point, I think at one of the meetings or
something that he like walked out of the room because
he like could have watched the TV. He was like,
I don't like this. This is so cringey. So I
(08:59):
made him sit his ass back down and I said, no,
we're gonna watch this. And then I told him about
how the one guy that's the quote unquote villain that
I had heard about looks like Jake. And I was
so happy you still had that story up of you
going back and forth and then him saying, oh soft
for a sales And I showed him that and he
thought it was so fun.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
We were laughing so hard. But I did get him hooked.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
We watched like a couple episodes last night, but now
I'm annoyed I got him hooked because now he's like, well,
you have to wait to watch it with me, and
I'm like, you can.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
Each watch it your own apartment. Also, I also fast
forward through the weddings bs and get straight to where
the I do or not.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
I think I did that at the last season too,
because I was like.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
I've been way too long. I don't they do. And
it's always actually care about seeing you get ready with
your family and friends. I don't need all your personal
shut up, get to it.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Ley, This is kind of random, but it's not sort
of not completely so. The person I'm seeing he was
at a wedding and this past weekend he told me.
The first thing that the bride's dad said for his
speech was all right, well, I'm gonna just like address
the elephant in the room. You might recognize me as
(10:14):
the guy from season eight of so and so reality show,
and they don't remember what the show was that he
was on, But the motherfucker started his speech to talk
about his wonderful daughter getting married, finding the lover of life,
talking about himself being on a reality TV show.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
That's so funny? Do you know that eighteen his wedding,
I made the joke that I'm going to be like, yes,
it is me Fallin from KATIEWB And she's like, no,
please do that, and I was like, there is no
chance I will make a moment of your wedding about me,
even if you think it's funny. I'm not doing that.
I thought you were gonna say, Okay, So, one other
guy I do not like on this season is the
(10:52):
soccer coach guy.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
Okay, I played soccer, Okay, okay, the one who played
soccer and got an injury. Oh yeah, he I think
after meeting his girl or seeing their meet, I was like,
I don't like him anymore.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
He keeps over and over again, basically bringing up that
he's normally drawn to women with dark features and he
picked a beautiful, thin blonde woe. Yeah right, she's so
beautiful one. Don't think it's about her size. Like he
meets it, he sees another girl from his past and
he's like, you can see he's just immediately more into
her because she has all the dark features. Yeah, but
like I almost died. They're sitting at the table, Jenny,
(11:29):
Oh my god. I don't know how these men exist
in the real world. He's like, I got an offer
for a soccer coach job and I'm sorry, I am
not trying to minimize the coaching jobs okay, but he's
not coaching like the Vikings okay. And he's like, I
mean you knew, I was no mad, Like I need
to know that you're trying to move your job and
she's like, I mean, yeah, I said I will. Like
(11:51):
I'm going to ask my boss tomorrow if I can relocate.
He's like, I just like don't want to miss this opportunity,
and I am dying. I'm like, bro, she has an
actual job and you're trying to make her feel like
her job needs to change so you can go coach.
I'm sorry, what do coaches make?
Speaker 2 (12:07):
And is it a professional soccer team? I don't either
a fucking high school I don't call it a.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
Team, but I'm imagining this guy is getting an offer
for fifty to sixty thousand dollars and making her feel
and that is not even the worst part of it.
She's then like, why aren't you having sex with me? Basically?
And he has the audacity like, well, I mean I
don't like when you get you pregnant. She's like, I'm
on my period. You can't get pregnant when you're on
your period. And he's like, well, I don't know, like
(12:33):
I thought it wasn't like right after. She's like it's
like two weeks after, and he's like, well, you know,
I'm just like maybe like if we get like a
She's like, I have tracked my period, like I'm very
good at tracking my period. She's like I do not
want a kid either, and he's like, well, I just
like She's like no, no, no, I feel like you you
act like I'm trying to trap you, Like I'm trying
to trap you on Ohio from taking this coaching job.
(12:55):
I'm trying to trap you with a kid. Trust me,
I am not trying to get pregnant. I do not
and like and he's like, well, maybe we can get
like a like a tracker we're on together. She's like, no, no,
I can track my own period and let you know
if i'm on it and when I'm ovulating. And I'm like,
this guy, why she's like, And I'm like, she's begging
(13:16):
to have sex. And then she he's like, doesn't want
to have sex when she's on her period. And I'm like, okay,
I get sometimes you don't, Like a lot of women
don't want to when they're on their period. But a
little bit about me, in the beginning of like a relationship,
when you're super horny and like all you kind of
look past the period usually in the beginning, and then
(13:36):
like maybe you later get into that or something, you
have that discussion if you really want to or not
depends on your mood that day. I don't know. I
just the fact that she's like, so, I'm like, you
can't touch me because I'm on my period. It was
just very bizarre. These relationships are so bizarre. They are.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
I mean, of course we're like sitting there making fun
of every interaction and stuff like things that everyone's saying.
But I did look over at him and I go,
I mean, don't you think our first date probably went
pretty similar to how these interactions are going? Like I
was like just being fair, like we were awkward to
(14:15):
an extent. You know, you don't know anything about another person,
and so it's like you you are not I don't
care what anyone says. You are never fully yourself when
you meet someone for the first time. And I'm still
not even after dating this person for a while. I'm
still not fully myself like personality wise, yes, but I
definitely hide certain things that are disgusting about me.
Speaker 1 (14:38):
I don't know, Jenny, if I hid anything from Jake
after the first like two weeks. I do think everything
was officially out.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
Which shows that you, like, really built a relationship that
you felt comfortable with quickly with him. And I'm not
saying that that's not how mine is.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
I just am, well, yeah, I'm not ever relationship is
There have been other relationships before that I think were
good that I was in maybe that I just didn't
I don't know. I think Jake is also just his
family and stuff. They're all just so open in an
accepting way that I don't know. I just it's I
feel like, I don't know what it is, and it
(15:18):
felt very comfortable. I didn't fart in front of him
for like a couple of weeks. But then when we
had the conversation and he just said that he would
burn hole through his car when he left my house
every morning. Just He's like, I don't know. It was
a company car. He's like, I'm surprised I didn't have
to just total it because he was like ripping ass
through the seats on the way home. And that is
a visual I can't get right up. And it made
(15:40):
me laugh and I was like, yeah, could you hold
it in in the beginning? Usually yeah, yeah, you do.
What else is new in your life?
Speaker 2 (15:49):
So we haven't talked a ton about this on the podcast,
but I have mentioned how I've just been dealing with
this crazy injury thing and I do it like a
million times better. But one of the side effects of
set injury is that I've barely been working out, and
I have not changed my eating whatsoever, so that has
not a line.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
And it's like you're a bad eater.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
I mean I'm snacky though, Like I eat a really
great meals and I will go I will be the
epitome of health up until about eight pm. Right something
hits something inside of me in my braking monster, I
do I start eating like chocolate chips, like I just
I have to have my little sweets or something at
that point, or I eat in the middle of the
night or whatever it is. And so everyone whatever, we
(16:34):
all go through like different seasons of life. And this
has been like different in the sense that I can't
work out as much as I used I'm used to. Well,
I want to put on a pair of jeans this weekend.
I don't think I've ever struggled that much to get
into a pair of jeans, not even when I'm like
in a fitting room trying on a side that's probably
too small.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
How recently did they fit you? Probably like a month ago?
Where were they tied on your butt? No, I couldn't
get him over my thighs. And then I do get
them over my thighs, the fucking zipper breaks. Oh no,
that's not that's not what you want to have. No,
Oh god, so I that was a that was a
faulty zipper. It's not because it's not your fault, Jenny, it.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
Is, but it is the kind of jeans that are
like stiff as a mother farmer after you wash them.
But I just bought them last May. Now, granted I
had lost some weight around that time because of depression, honestly,
but like I so, I've gained some of that back.
But now I swear it's like it feels like I've
gained like twenty pounds in a month, and I know
(17:35):
I haven't.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
No, but how are you handling that? Where the genes alow?
Did you have a mental breakdown?
Speaker 2 (17:40):
I didn't have a mental breakdown, but I had to
film all these videos. So now I'm frantically looking for
a pair of gens that don't feel awful. There was
a video of me that we recorded last week where
I was honestly, I looked at myself and I was
pretty self conscious of how I looked like in it.
And I know I'm giving myself the grace from the
fact that I have not been able to live the
(18:02):
lifestyle I'm used to because of this injury. But at
the same time, it's just so fucking annoying to know
that I have to work out as often as I
do to keep just a moderately in shape body, and
that will be the rest of my life. The rest
of my life, I'll.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
Have to do this. I completely understand what you're saying,
and I think that it is because you put in
so much work to like, at some point, you put
in work to lose weight, right or to get physically fit,
if that's where you're at life. I'm talking directly to Jenny,
but also to myself because we both have been through
(18:38):
that and how hard you have to work to get it,
and then within two weeks it feels like you can
lose it. Like I have not been actively doing pilates
pretty much. It I'll go like once a week. It's
not enough to maintain. So I feel like after doing
like one hundred and fifty classes going so regularly that
(19:00):
when I stopped for like two weeks, I lost everything
I built for a year. Is what I felt like.
I did yesterday for the first time. I couldn't even
tell the last one did weightlifting. I did weightlifting yesterday
because Jake did this like build this whole gym, which
I gave him crap about. But I as we get
older as women, we have got to do weightlifting because
our bone density goes down all these things like osteoporosis,
(19:22):
like you, we have got to like build our muscles
and they it's just so important. So I was like,
I need to get back into this. I was benching
the bar and it was difficult. I you know this
about me, Like I used to be pretty strong with weightlifting.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Train with Fallon and our trainer every once in a while,
and Fallan was always stronger than me.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
Well I on certain things, on other things not so much.
We have our different but I was like, I felt
very weak and it made me kind of mad. But
I was also like in the mindset of like, well,
I haven't done this in a long time. But I
also like I know, like I hate that, like you are,
were having those feelings and like it's like looking down
a barrel honestly of like, this is my life for
(20:02):
the rest of my life, if I want to look
the way I feel comfortable.
Speaker 2 (20:06):
Yeah, well it was that, but like I can acknowledge
that I've been eating more I think lately and I
don't know, and I think it's all kind of a
domino effect for me because when I get a workout in,
like early in the morning, the rest of my day
I'm like so good.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
If I put off working out, like, I don't know
how my day will be because it's all about, like
you raise your cortisol levels in the morning, and then
the rest of the day you make better choices because
you've already raised those and so it only goes downhill
from there and you feel better throughout the day and
so you make better choices. In general, I've been a
fucking dumpster lately. Everything that I see in my house
(20:41):
I eat. I'm like, oh, this looks gone. Those looks
I brought in it's in my car still because I
didn't have enough hands to bring it in this morning.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Yeah. I bought one of those giant.
Speaker 2 (20:50):
Like sixty packs of rice crispies from Costco, the ones
I used to like hide from my last partner. I
can never eat one. I have to have two to
three and I finally they are small, But like at midnight,
do I need to be eating like three rice crispy
trees in the middle of the night. I don't know,
do you, Jenny, No, I don't don't, Okay, I don't.
(21:13):
And so I sat there and I was like, I'm
either throwing these out, which I would never do because
I would never waste something, I'm giving them to the
person I'm seeing, or I'm bringing them into work. And
so the person I'm seeing also said he would not
be able to control himself. Yeah, so he took a
couple for the road, but like wouldn't take the box.
But I brought them in there in my car and
I'm gonna put them in the sales area for whoever
(21:33):
wants them because I can't stop myself.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
Can I tell you what Colt and I are. We
have a business plan that you could be a part of. Okay,
I'm in Okay. Maybe since there is no longer a
vending machine here, we've committed to getting a little mini
fridge and like kind of like when you'd have like
the honor system with a Venmo and like have our
own little snacks and people will know about it and
(21:57):
they can buy them, but like for a charge, like
we buy the bulk for like of Dorito's and like
diet coke, and like one other thing maybe it's rice
Krispy treatz. We have them in like a little cupboard.
We let rumors get around. There's a venmo with pricing.
There's a camera, so you can't be a like sneaky link. Okay,
And basically we're running a school fundraiser program, making just
(22:20):
a little side cash, but also bringing people the joy
that they are missing in their lives from not having
the vending machine. Your thoughts, okay, brilliant idea. I haven't
talked a cult about you being a part of this,
and I don't think he's gonna like that being spread
three ways, so I would like to be I would
like you to know that one day I'm going to
do a game on our show, a bit called Who's
cheaper Cult or Jenny? And I do surprisingly think it's Jenny,
(22:45):
but in different ways. Things that Jenny will do cult
would rather die than do. But you two are probably
the most frugal. That's the nicer way of saying cheap
people I have ever met in my life. So my
fear at the beginning as you started pitching this was
the fact that you would trust anyone in this building
(23:06):
to actually pay for these snacks when everyone is a
freeloader and have a hammer. I'm gonna bring that's results MONITORINGZ.
Speaker 2 (23:12):
Once you brought the camera and I was like, okay,
now we're talking business to yell. Prior to that, I
was like, no fucking chance, we'll be in the hole.
We'll be negative from that. I know, I'll just take
everything for free.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
Everyone. Well, that's why it's like crazy. I genuinely do
think it's crazy. They got rid of the vending machines
and they're not planning on replacing them because we work
in arguably one of the most unhealthy industries. Everyone in here,
I'm sorry, I'm gonna say the word we're mentally fat focks. Okay,
I'm not saying everyone physically is. We are mentally disgusting humans.
(23:44):
We will eat. We'll go in a kitchen. There will
be donuts there that have been there for eight hours,
and there's you can watch people are debating, do I
eat this chicken not let donuts that's more acceptable. Do
you eat this chicken that's been sitting here for eight hours?
That's how despicable we are. So to get rid of
probably the only thing that brought some people in this
building joy anymore, which was for Colt flame and hot Cheetos,
(24:09):
diet Mountain dew for me, a diet Coke's. It feels
like the final the final straw of my sanity. Honestly,
I agree with that. Emily, who is our office manager,
is so sick and tired of hearing about people complain.
She's let me know she's over it, and I think she.
Speaker 2 (24:26):
She has to deal with all of our constantly, That's
what I said building, and Emily is the one that
has to hear it. She is.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
She is the leader of the daycare. And I couldn't
agree more. But she was like, you guys are adult,
you can get food. I'm like, no, yeah, no, because
it's you know, the difference, right, I don't want I'm
not going to buy diet coke because I would never
regularly drink diet coke. That's disgusting, slash. I will buy
(24:55):
one every other day here same like you don't feel
so bad about it a little tree. I don't keep
it in my house. I'm not canimal. No, but now
jakes them buy and diet coke can, so I am, Oh,
he's because Dylan likes him too, And I'm like Dylan,
I don't think you should be drinking these. You're eighteen.
It's not your growth or something. I'm making stuff up.
Speaker 2 (25:15):
I want to revert back to because I didn't know
that Colt was a flaming hot Cheetos girly.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
He is the epitome of white trash. Are you kidding me?
His combo is flaming hot, flaming hot Cheetos with a
diet mountain dew.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
Oh god, the worst soda that's ever existed is diet
mountain dew. So that's disgusting. It's so gross. That's so gross.
But I said it gives him more of a jolt
than diet coke. So people now associate Colt and I
with diet coke. Yep, Colp only pretty much gets a
diet coke if it's his only option or it's given
to him. He gets more of a charge from.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
Diet mountain dew. Now that's crazy. He is wild.
Speaker 2 (25:50):
So I am judging that combination of stuff.
Speaker 1 (25:53):
But if that's your combo, I'm sorry if you felt
offended by me saying it's the white trash combo, but
it is. Yeah, that's sept from someone who's drinking Dike coke.
And they call those refrigerator cigarettes.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
Right. So so I did a van trip two weekends ago,
and I thought I'd go a little bit crazy and
bought some flaming hot Cheetos.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Oh you crazy. Those are so much spicier than I realized.
I can't do them.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
They are pretty spicy, and I can handle them, don't
get me wrong, But you know, like you go in
and you have like the worst cheeto fingers within like
two bites. It like really lingers with the flaming hot.
But I have decided, Remember, I started a list of
things I should not be consuming anymore, chest flaming hot Cheetos.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Got to be on there.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
I was a mess for days because of that. Also
because I ate some undercooked salmon, but that's a different
story for a different times. God, yeah, I just it
was one of those filets where it was so thick
on one side and then like barely anything at these
I baked. Oh this wasn't in the van.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
I was about to be fucking that you were taking salmon.
Oh my god, I know me over my little burner.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
No, no, no, no, this was bags in an oven. But
it was like one of those ones where you know
you got a long piece and the top part is
so thick it's like fucking two inches and the bottom is.
Speaker 1 (27:13):
Barely a centimeter. It's annoying.
Speaker 2 (27:15):
So it's like the thick part got barely cooked. But
I was like, it's fine. I eat sushi. It's different,
n it is different. I learned that when I had
to google what happens when you eat undercos and I
was like, oh, no, faster bait in the van. No,
I never have. I've thought about it, but for some
reason I have. Yeah, for some reason, it doesn't feel right,
(27:39):
like I don't know why, but it feels like because
I'm like in public, you know, like I'm out in
the middle, literally.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Shit in a hole next to it, and you are
concerned that someone will see you inside your van baiting.
All right, I'm not.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
I mean I would never be concerned about that because
I do like cover everything. As soon as I get somewhere,
I make sure my windows are covered. That's like a safety.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
We never even talked about, By the way, sorry, now
that you've already answered, we never even talked about your
creepy run in that you focused on stories.
Speaker 2 (28:08):
I genuinely was like, was I at my head or what?
But I know I wasn't.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
I mean.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Long story short is, I was parked somewhere in the
city of Duluth, and I've parked there before, and I'm
kind of starting to get ready to fall asleep and
I heard like a noise outside. Didn't think much of
it because it is an area where there are like
some houses and stuff, but you can legally park. I
was like, buy a harbor like in front of like water,
and you can legally park there. Overnight, I start to
(28:35):
fall asleep and I hear this, like what sounded like
a snowball being thrown onto my windshield, and I'm like,
at that point, this is what happens every time I
hear a weird noise. I freeze because I'm laying in bed,
and I freeze, and I just listen to everything that's
happening around me to figure out if there's someone like
right outside my van or not, or an animal, which
is what it is if I'm out in the wild wild.
(28:58):
And so I go and I start looking out the
front windows, and then finally I look out the driver's
side and I'm just peeking through like a little bit
so nobody can see. And I hear someone yell hey,
and it scared the shit out of me. And so
when you settle in for the night there's shit everywhere.
(29:18):
You can't drive off just suddenly. A lot of times,
I mean you can in an emergency, yeah, but at
that point I was so scared. I was like, I'm leaving.
And so what I think happened is that so I
use an app called i Overlander too. It helps you
find places to wild camp, and I feel like the
people who live in that area probably know that there's
(29:40):
a pin now on that point that like there's probably
people that wild camp there all the time, and maybe
they just get sick of it and they're nervous if
they have kids that like whatever. I mean, I'm literally
I go in as late as I can, Like I
got in it like probably like nine thirty at the spot,
was gonna leave really early. So I think they probably
just know that it's a wild camping spot and they're
(30:02):
sick of it, is what I kind of felt after
I left this space.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
But I had to drive away.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
At like eleven thirty at night and find a new
place to sleep, which is like whatever, that's what you
deal with with doing wild camping.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
And all that.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
But I've decided now that I'm going to start gate
keeping the places.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
That I find.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
Yeah, and not put it on that app because I
used to like want to be helpful and put spots
out there. But I'm like, I think I'm going to
start gate keeping the spots I find because I don't
want a million people.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
To show up there.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
And then I mean, the spots I find are normally
in the middle of nowhere. It's not in the city.
I usually I rarely do city camping.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
But anyways, yeah, so crazy, it's freaked me out.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
I wouldn't even I woke up and I'm using this
propane heater right now, which before anyone comes at me,
I have a carbon monoxide detector. I know it's not
the best option, but my diesel heater and my electrics
fucked up from this accident, so it was what I have,
but I use that and it ran out, so like
halfway through the night, I had no heat in there,
(31:01):
which was fine, I just had to change the gas
I or the tank. I just like hadn't done yet,
but I ran out, so there's no heat. But I
woke up profusely sweating that night, stripped down to almost nothing.
I think I had just had my sleeping shorts on,
and that was it, because I know I was so
anxious in my sleep that I woke up sweating so
much that night and then just like I don't know
(31:23):
that whole This past weekend was like a reset for
me because that weekend I got barely any sleep. It
was very fun, but I got barely any sleep. So anyways,
we're all good. Nothing bad happened. Just trush your intuition,
is what I always say with things like that. The
moment I feel danger, I leave.
Speaker 1 (31:39):
I'm not even fucking around. It's like I'm out smart.
Well that's that, okay. So Jenny and I are actually
going to be this weekend at the Home of Garden Show.
We should mention that I don't know all the details
other than were there three to five, So if you're there,
come say hi. I know we're hosting Captain Sandy from
Below Deck. She's like doing a stage thing and we'll
(32:02):
be hosting that sometime between three and five. If you're around,
stop buy and say hi. If not, we'll have details
soon on our live podcast and get those to you.
Speaker 2 (32:10):
Yes, thanks, maybe we'll see you then or whatever the
live pot is.
Speaker 1 (32:15):
NYE
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