Sports At 7

Some sports gambling will be happening in Vegas during Mikey's vacation. 

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
This is a downbeat. The littlehockey team did something good last night.
They went again. Are they clinched? They clinched first in the Western Conference
and they did it in a shootoutagainst Saint Louis last year. There,
dude, that was here. Andit was a late game because I saw

(00:23):
a tweet from Grooves at around nineto thirty and it said I at hockey
game. I was like, ohcool, I wonder it's probably about over
and they were barely in the firstperiod. Geez. Really yeah, really
strange. So that's the last oneof the regular season, right, I
think it is? Is it?Is it their final? Or they have
one more? N that appears tobe it. Yep, and we got

(00:51):
two seven Let's see we got howmany more MAVs we got? Well,
we got Clippers that Sunday. Yeah, we've been done. Jesus, play
off on ABC. I can't wait. Let's start with that in Sports at
seven, Get job Stars, andnow sports at start with our little Mavericks.

(01:21):
I guess. And we will watchthe Stars playoff games and be pumped
and talk about them the day after. But I don't know. I'm locked
in on MAVs. I'm very firedup. You're ready for next week because
you know what next week means.What, Well, we get the beautiful,

(01:42):
beautiful two thirty pm tip on Sunday, and then you and I are
off on Monday, and then youand I come back on Tuesday well rested
and fresh, only to have toprobably stay up until midnight to watch a
nine pm first tip. And I'massuming that on Tuesday night the first tip

(02:06):
will be Okay, yep, Sowe've got MAVs clips on TNT. First
tip scheduled for nine o'clock. Inreality, it'll probably be closer to nine
thirty. And that's if the TeaWolves and Sons finish their game in regulation.
Sure, that's double ot thriller.And I don't know how to navigate
this man, because there's nothing worsethan coming in here and rocking three hours

(02:30):
of sleep. Yeah, but I'mnot missing. I'm not either, So
we're just gonna do it. Yep. That's why we are not only the
comedy first responders or the first respondersof comedy. Yeah, first responders of
sports. Okay, he's Danny Bayless. It's gonna be Mike Roy Kevin week.

(02:50):
It's gonna be an awesome week.It starts Sunday, and we discussed
this a little yesterday. We needto we need to lock this down.
I'm going to Las Vegas and gamblingis legal there, and my MAVs bone
is full masked and I want toget down on big action and I invite
you to do the same with me. And yesterday a bunch of people texting

(03:12):
they want to get in. No, not doing it. We're not getting
everybody in on this. This isjust you and I, all right,
And I think you should send methree hundred dollars, okay, And if
you do that, and these oddscould fluctuate a little bit, I don't
know, but I will get usbets on. The first one would be

(03:35):
the MAVs are minus one against theClippers this Sunday, Game one in Los
Angeles. If we think the MAVsare gonna win the series, I mean
it is odd their favorite on theroad, but I part of me thinks
that they are going to handle upon the Clippers good and that would mean
winning the first game. Now,they could lose the first game, so
win the series, no problem.But I think if we believe in them

(03:59):
and they do thump the clips,you know you would never get a minus
one again in the series. AndI think first game, I think we
get down on it, okay,and that's just basically straight up to one,
straight up, it'll basically two hundred. I'll cover the big so it'll
be two twenty to win, towin two hundred bucks, basically double our

(04:19):
money. Yeah, so we would, you know, make two hundred bucks
each if whatever veigs or fees orwhatever included. I don't even know what
that means. That's the juice yougot to pay the man. Okay.
So if it's if they're minus oneten, so you have to pay one
hundred and ten dollars to win onehundred dollars and they build a new casino

(04:39):
in the desert. I mean,that's how it works. So we'll put
two twenty to win two hundred.That's just straight up that game. Then
it gets more exciting because if youdo believe in them to win the Western
Conference right now, you can getthem at seven to one. It was
six to one yesterday. Well thatI again, it might be I don't
know what it'll be at the sportsbook. I'm at right know, and

(05:00):
I'm probably not going to walk andshop around all these sports books. So
whenever they're offering, you definitely wantto get these bets in before they play.
Oh yeah on Sunday, I'll getthem in tonight. Obviously you'd have
to write yeah, because that wouldchange Yeah, yeah, I mean if
they thumped the Clippers in Game oneon the road, that's going to drop
that Western Conference thing is going todrive rather like that. That gives them

(05:21):
a massive advantage in their first series, and that puts them one step closer.
So yes, the odds would changesignificantly. Well, I'll get these
in this afternoon. Okay, sevento one to win the West. Okay,
now that is a seven hundred dollarspayout. Yes, so it's two
hundred, fourteen hundred dollars. Arewe still at sixteen to one for the

(05:45):
to win to win it all,win the whole shebang? Sixteen to one,
So that's one hundred bucks to winsixteen hundred collectively are two hundred to
win thirty two hundred bucks. Butyes, if you send me the three
hundred, we'll have three bets.You win a hundred bucks essentially if they
beat the Clippers someday, Okay,if they win, then we'll just be

(06:06):
holding our tickets and they got towin the West and that'll be seven hundred
bucks, and then sixteen hundred bucksif you win twenty three. This is
the fun part is where you addup all your winnings like, okay,
god, that'll be a lot ofmoney to do that twent It won't be
us just ripping tickets. About tendays from now, the Clippers close them

(06:28):
out for one after taking them inthe the series opener. Of course they
lose the game one, and youknow, just tear them all up.
I'll tell you what I feel like. My odds are much better doing that
then refunding my whatever it's called lottopocket app three. Yeah, jack pocket

(06:51):
app for three hundred. Oh I'mput in twenty and I did win seven.
Okay, that's pretty solid seven bucksoff of a jackpocket. But I'm
down to a dollar. You havea dollar in my account? Oh well,
one scratchy. I haven't got anyemails from jackpocket either. I got
that one. You're a winner.I was like, what did I win

(07:13):
the power ball? No? Youclick on your email because that would be
how you found out. I know. Yeah, yeah, I wonder if
you win the whole m effort?Yeah, how it's different. If they
send you that email and it justtells you like you would have contact your
local you'd have an effing heart attack. If you were you wouldn't believe it.
Number One, if you clicked onyour jackpocket app Jackpocket email it said

(07:39):
or just the app and the balancewas twenty dollars and now it's one point
two billion, like refresh. Idon't think that's how it works. I
wonder if they say, yeah,you need to call you need to call
a human Yeah, and a lawyer. Yeah. Well look, that's a

(07:59):
fool's air. And when you betwith throwing industries, you bet to win,
all right. This is the manthat is admitted on these airwaves that
he's lost in excess of one hundredthousand dollars gambling in his life excess.
Right, Yes, that's a guess. But yeah, okay, I'm a
terrible gambler. I do not feellike my money is safe with you in

(08:20):
pretty much any aspect, especially thisone. But I'm still going to do
this. You're in the right headspace, Yeah, you're in the right where
I need you. Now. Theproblem is what an idiot if we win?
Yeah, I fear the I fearthe wild ass ploy to reinvestt to

(08:46):
just let me hang on to it. He's also going to win. Yeah,
Rangers, now reinvest. No,this is a one These are a
one off or a three off bet. We're putting one hundred bucks each.
You know what idiot Italian boy wouldwant in on this? I don't even
have to ask him. And youknow we will find out if he has

(09:07):
an ear button his ear on LakeComo, because they'll be texting us in
just a second. That says I'min. But when we should include him,
she wouldn't. I don't think hewould admit to that that he's listening
to us while he's on an Italianlake. He doesn't want to miss out
on action. He's hot. Playswho likes action more? You or him?
I think him. I think hedoes too. I think just because

(09:28):
he's younger. I'm I'm a littleolder, and I know that I'm just
paying for entertainment. I think hestill clings to hope that riches await I
know it, they won't. Imean that's why I play slots, dude,
you do or don't? I dobecause it's the because it's my only

(09:48):
chance to make it all back inone second. You know, it's the
only thing you do in there thatyou could make ten thousand dollars in ten
seconds. And I know it's justless odds and longer shot and suckers bet.
And it's ninety seven or ninety threepercent of a casino's income is via

(10:09):
the slot machine. Yeah, that'scrazy. That's why they're everywhere. Like
those table games are the a workas well. I did a big deep
dive on this years ago when wewere going to Vegas on percentages and what
your actual best bet in Vegas was, and I don't really remember all of
that. I'm pretty sure your literalbest bet in Vegas is craps to back
up the point number, you know, if you put ten bucks on the

(10:31):
on the pass line and then thenumbers set at six, and to back
that up with maximum, which Ithink is forty dollars if you put ten,
I think backing up that bet isyour best odds in Las Vegas.
But the bad odds roulette is notgreat odds, but it's fun. Christina
likes it. And if you justget kind of lucky, you can tread

(10:52):
water and spend some time at thetable, get a bunch of drinks.
I played Roulette for three hours beforebroken even had ten drinks. Had an
absolute blast of a time, Tendrey, Yeah, I can only imagine.
Yes, I think the first timeI've only been to Vegas once, and
the first night there, I spentthe entire night until the sun came up

(11:20):
playing video poker. Yeah, itjust straight up Texas hold'em, playing against
the computer. And I think Iactually came out a little bit ahead,
and I would have come out moreahead because I was trying to be strategic
and when to do max betting.And I remember I went on this really

(11:46):
bad run of betting all of mycredits because I think you could go up
to like at the time, thiswas a long time ago, that you
could bet five credits. Essentially you'replaying a quarter or whatever. I remember
at one point it was I gota little bit down and I'm looking at
my bankroll and I'm thinking, man, I probably need to back off for

(12:07):
a little bit and try to rebuildthis back up. And the first time
I pulled back max credits to bettinga single credit, I hit a straight
flush. Really yeah, oh,betting a single credit. Yeah. I
dropped from from max credits to singlecredits, and I popped a straight flush
which at the it paid like fivehundred bucks, but it should have paid

(12:28):
about twenty five hundred bucks. AndI would have just walked away at that
point. And that fuels you thinkthe whole thing is rigged. It is
rigged. I feel like it can'tbe that random that the one time that
you back off, ease up onyour on your juice that they give you,
they reward you. I don't know. I mean, I don't know
how that works legislation and oversight forthese things that I don't know. I

(12:50):
mean, look, I don't thinkthough it's rigged like that. Yeah,
I mean it's rigged to a percentageto pay out less than it takes in
over a long period of time.But I don't think it's right. Like
my nightmare is to play max betson a slot for an hour and then
you know, you get down tothe credit, your credits get below the
minimum them out for max bets,you have to lower your bet and then

(13:11):
you lower it like you said,the lowest one, and then you hit
the progressive and you're not eligible forit, you know, because you didn't
bet bet max or that you getup after two hours at the slot,
and as you're walking away, thegrandma sits down with their oxygen tanking and
hits yep. And don't you knowwhat if you get off off a slot,

(13:31):
just get it away from that thingas quick as possible. You don't
don't want to know. I don'twant to see that. I don't want
to see the balloons drop and theglitter and the sparkler girls come out and
them with the giant check for gamgam as. I'm open back to the
bar I had to. I mean, like, I played video poker back
when it was like it's kind oflegal in Texas, or playing it online,

(13:56):
not video poker, online poker,and until they kind of shut that
down. But I felt I couldtell that whether it was being prone to
an addicted personality or whatever, Iknew how I felt playing those games and
gambling, and I knew that Iprobably needed to not do that anymore because

(14:18):
it wasn't something that I could affordto be an addict to. No exactly,
Well, we talked about we're talkingabout the Otani thing and the amount
you bet, and there's some sortof gauge inside of every human of what
you you know, you, Well, I don't know. Some people are
just smart and hell, I thinkwomen are just in general smarter than men,

(14:41):
and women in my life don't reallygamble. Like Christina is going this
week and I think it is herfirst time in Vegas, and I think
she has budgeted for gambling on theentire trip one hundred dollars. That's so
smart. And she's like nervous aboutit. She's like, what am I
gonna play? And I'm like,a hundred bucks that's I mean, Christina,

(15:03):
this has happened where Christina's like,I have to go to the bathroom,
like cool, of course, helpher find a bathroom, and I
sit down at a slot to waitwhile she's in the bathroom, and I
torch one hundred bucks. Yeah,in the slot machine, because you play
max bets, and some of thesefan slot machines, you hit max bet
and forty five dollars just jumped outof your account, like they make it

(15:24):
confusing. I don't know what themax bet was, right, like I'd
like to put I mean fifteen bucksper bet, you know, five,
ten, fifteen, three times play, And there's a reason like that.
There's a reason why those damn machinesare everywhere in that city, right.
I remember leaving Vegas to come backto Dallas in the airport and there's slot

(15:46):
machines all over the airport, orat least there were back then. Oh
there are. Did they have theDid they still have the cigarette atrium at
Mcarran? Yeah? I think theydo. My god. I mean,
if you've never been to Vegas,there's this little uh class figurette there's this
plastic cube that's inside the airport thatyou walk by, and it's just this

(16:08):
big like a room that it's clearglass and you can go inside and smoke
with cigarette in this little thing inthe inside the airport, and inside there
are slot machines. So you're I'vegot this addiction to this, this tobacco.
I've got to go feed this.Well what have we here? For?
One? I don't mess aroun atthe airport because I usually leave depressed

(16:34):
and broke, broke, and Ijust don't. But I love it.
I don't care. It's fun,man, but it is fun. And
I love that feeling that that Iguess it's adrenaline or dopamine or whatever it
is, and you keep chasing itbecause you want that that feeling to keep
going, but I always found myselfat the end of it. And maybe

(16:55):
this is what a good A goodnight of cocaine feels like. Is he
keep chasing it all night and thenyou realize it's like, Okay, this
just isn't gonna work out for me. And then the come down off of
that that dopamine, it's just abummer. I remember feeling depressed the next
day. Yeah. Now, grantedthe time that I realized that that gambling

(17:15):
is not for me unless it's somethingfun like we're doing up here with the
masters, or I'm throwing you venmowingyou three hundred bucks to bet on my
favorite basketball team. But I knewthat it was wrong for me when I've
told you the guys this story before. When we did the hey, let's
go to Shreveport tonight. Sure,Me and three of my friends drove to

(17:37):
Shreveport. Two of the friends weredegenerate gamblers that loved blackjack, and we're
gonna sit at a table all nightlong. Me and the girlfriend of one
of these dudes found our way tothe cheap slots and we sat there for
about two hours and played cheap slots. And I'll be damned to play in
those slots. I got up likefive hundred and six hundred dollars, took
the money, went back and foundthe dudes playing blackjack and sat with and

(18:00):
one of the guys that's kind ofan expert at it told me how to
bet. I lost all of thatmoney in about ten minutes doing just following
his instruction, like we were colludingat the table, which I don't know
if that's legal or not. It'sfine, it's fine. And he's like
telling me exactly what to do,and he's kind of bait, figuring out
how he's going to play based onwhat he knows I'm going to play.

(18:22):
And I lost every bit of thatmoney in about ten or fifteen minutes.
And I was blasted out of mybrain on free alcohol and woke up the
next day in a hotel room bedand had three receipts in my pocket from
the ATM for one hundred dollars eachwith fifteen dollars ATM fees. And not
only did I lose that six hundredbucks, I went in the hole another

(18:45):
three hundred and felt like crap.I was hungover and just felt shame and
to come down off of that wholeevening, like I'm never doing this again
because I'm not mature enough to handleit. And you do it again and
I didn't. Never went back.Well, that's never been to a casino
since. Okay, Well that's howI've lost. What I've lost is because
yes, I feel that same thing, and then you get kind of an

(19:07):
itch, like, all right,let's get back to it, let's fix
all this, let's make it allright. I like our odds with the
MAVs, though I do too.I feel good too if they just win
Sunday. I mean, you've doubledyour money, yeah, and that chips
away at the bet that you madeon the West or on the NBA Finals,
you should be good. The otherreason, I don't know if slots

(19:29):
are rigged, but I always seein commercials, for you know, even
our you know, the greatness ofchalk taw. In the commercial, they
can show the slot machine hitting likethe ultimate progressive thing, and then the
beautiful woman in the sequin dress goesyes and they cheers their martini glasses.
So I'm like, well, youcan do it in the commercial, so
I know you're at least capable.Commercials don't lie you're at least capable of

(19:53):
making that machine hit what you wantat the head. It's true. I
love it, dude. I don'tknow. You're gonna have great time to
have a blast. And we hadenough fun stuff planned going to concerts and
uh dinners and stuff. And plusit's Christina's first time in Vegas, which
I'm almost more excited about than anything. That's one of the cool things about
And she's such so open minded andfun about these She's so good to go

(20:15):
with stuff. She just wants togo and have a good time. I
mean, maybe foolishly, but shetrusts that I tend to know what the
hell is going on. I mean, I've been in Vegas a lot,
so I'm I know all these directionallywhere we're headed and all that, and
I just want to see her seeit, you know. I mean,
it's something to see. Man.You don't realize how massive that strip is

(20:36):
until you walk out of your hotelroom and see how wide that damn street
is and how long. And it'sjust in cool as far as you can
see, it's as far as youcan see, brightest lights and all this
stuff. And she wants to seethe Fountain of belage, you know,
like yeah, and I like teristystuff. When I went, I stayed
at the Venetian and it was prettynew. Yeah, it was like damn

(20:57):
near brand new. I think itopened that you and just you can just
stay in your hotel at some ofthose places and never leave and not be
bored. Yeah, you know.And the restaurants are incredible. It's so
good. Back in my buffet days, you know about probably in my twenties,
late twenties when I went, whatyou get to eat all of it?

(21:18):
Boy, they crank the prices upon those now though, I think
you're fifty bucks? Oh yeah,they were, They were twenty five thirty
bucks, you know, twenty thirtyyears ago. So if they are really
fifty sixty bucks for the Venetian Buffet, and I guess they're like, oh,
it's all King crab leg and stuff. Thank King. I think I
could go now, rab Leg.I think I could go now and handle

(21:41):
myself. I do. But yeah, at twenty nine, oh good,
I'll be there in eight hours.All right, I'll get you that cash.
Let's bet on some MAVs. We'sbet on the MAVs. This has
been sports at seven. Uh weshould have done that during the scuttle butt.
Instead of that, we screwed thingsup, so I actually do probably
in the scuttle butt, Let's getto the dude was banned for life in
the damn NBA. I want toget to Mark Cuban's Texas, Yes,

(22:03):
and we never got that yesterday.We'll discuss next right here on ninety seven
one. The freak