Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
So I found this list of annoying habits women do
that irritate their partners. Yeah, so I'm interested if Lindsay
does these or do we think they're irritating Okay, okay
somebody this person says their girlfriend doesn't eat the egg
part of the egg. They eat the white part and
(00:35):
not the yolk. Okay, so weird eating habits.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Yeah, I eat the whole egg. I love eggs.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
I don't see any problem with that because some people
are just egg whites only.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
Yeah, just eat buy egg whites then. Yeah, the oolk
is literally the best part it is, I get it.
If you want egg whites, that's fine. Just eat egg whites. Now.
Speaker 4 (00:55):
I will save the yolk for the last part, because,
like you just said, it's the best part.
Speaker 5 (00:59):
I gotta cut it and mix it up.
Speaker 4 (01:01):
Hey, that too sometimes, but I like to dunk my
toast in the in the yellow yolk, and sometimes my bacon.
Speaker 5 (01:09):
How Norman Rockwell of you.
Speaker 4 (01:11):
Yeah, if I'm eating waffles, I'll dip my waffle in
the yolk.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
Why because it's so damn syrup. It's not better than syrup.
It's true when it comes to waffles, and like pancakes
and shit. Uh yeah, yeah, that's gross. Biscuits and toast
is the only thing you should be stopping up egg
yolks with. So do you not put syrup on your
I do, and then you also dip it in the
egg yolk.
Speaker 5 (01:33):
Sometimes it's all cool dum exactly.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
This person says their wife will put like tubs or
baskets on the stairs to store stuff in so she
doesn't have to take it all the way upstairs.
Speaker 5 (01:47):
She's expecting him to take it upstairs.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
I don't think that's This isn't an Amazon box, but
I understand what you're a point you're making.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
No, that just clutters up the stairway.
Speaker 5 (01:56):
I agree, I agree.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
That would bother.
Speaker 5 (01:59):
That's out of me.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
That uh, the way their partner puts in fills the dishwasher.
Speaker 5 (02:05):
Yeah, no, there are some people that don't know what
the hell they're doing.
Speaker 6 (02:09):
I know that annoys you.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
It doesn't annoy me, But I accept people's faults, like
it's okay to admit you don't know how to do it.
Speaker 5 (02:18):
Yeah, are the dishes in the dishwasher?
Speaker 4 (02:20):
Yes, okay, I'll rearrange it if I can see that
there's room for more, if you if we do it like.
Speaker 5 (02:27):
This, right.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
That's mostly my thing is I don't want to have
to hand do dishes or leave them in the scene.
Speaker 4 (02:33):
My thing is my husband will He'll rinse off the
dishes and then stack them on the counter. And I'm like, bro,
what is this? But I didn't you to put them
in the freaking dishwasher.
Speaker 5 (02:43):
You just do dishes. Then if that's the way it's
gonna be, then you fucking do the dishes. Yeah, I
don't mind. That sounds like a great idea. Yeah, I'm
completely okay with it. Then you're not bitching it me
for the way I put them in the dishwasher. Yeah,
that problems solved.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
The the The other thing too, that's really fascinating about
the dishwasher is that I can run it as much
as I want. I love running it twice in a
day is like, man, Pinnacle day.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
It's not the it's not the amount of water that
it uses that gets me.
Speaker 5 (03:14):
It's just the soup. Yeah. I go through, you know,
twice as much dishwasher detergent. Yeah, you know.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
And for me and me personally, I'm like, fuck, I'm out.
I gotta wait a half a week to go get
some more soap.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Okay, do you use the dishwasher pods for the gel?
Speaker 5 (03:32):
The pods, that's the only way to do it.
Speaker 4 (03:34):
Yeah, I use the pods too, but I'm thinking about
switching to the gel because I have glasses that have
designs on them and the designs seem to be fading.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
Yeah, because you have to hand wash them. Yeah, those
are not dishwashers safe. Boy.
Speaker 5 (03:49):
I tell you what. I got a couple of shot glasses.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
They were fucking cool as too, man, and we use
them and I put them in the dishwasher and I
fucking next day I pull them out to put them
up fucking on.
Speaker 5 (04:00):
They're just clear shot. I was so pissed up.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
There are just some things that are supposed to be
hand washed when we buy, like glasses to have cocktails in,
or wineglasses. If it says hand wash only, nope, But
I try really hard not to buy that stuff.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
But a lot of them all say dishwashers sand yep.
Speaker 5 (04:18):
Yeah, it's how they get you.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Well, they may say that, but if they're etched or whatever,
that negates that. This person says their partner goes through
a tube of toothpaste every few days. I'm not this bad.
But I don't fuck around with my toothpaste. I'm not
gonna be like I gotta get another penny out of it, Like,
fuck off, I'll just open another tube. Say they go
through a tube of toothpaste every couple of days.
Speaker 5 (04:42):
That's what this says. Well, one, how small are these
tubes of toothpaste? Or two? How much fuck a toothpaste?
Speaker 1 (04:48):
Are you?
Speaker 5 (04:48):
Are you eating it?
Speaker 6 (04:49):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (04:50):
Yeah, I know?
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Is it a travel size?
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Right? That's the one thing that makes And if that's
the case, bro, buy a bigger tube of toothpaste, it'll
last longer.
Speaker 5 (05:01):
Don't just bite your cheap ass.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Another one is when girls don't clean their hair up
in the shower.
Speaker 5 (05:09):
Oh, when they cling it to the wall something like that. Yeah, yeah,
that's name.
Speaker 4 (05:14):
I'm guilty of this every woman. But I will eventually
clean it. I love that word eventually.
Speaker 5 (05:20):
I gotta give it to my girlfriend. She does.
Speaker 3 (05:23):
She is not a hairclumper, and if she is, she's
fucking cleaning it up. Because the times that she's taking
a shower at my house, which has been quite a
bit we've been together almost two years now, I have
never once seen a fucking wad of hair stuck to
the wall in the shower.
Speaker 5 (05:37):
Yeah. My, it's that in the sinks. That hair ends
up in the sink and then it's.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
Clogged, and I just I've just started grabbing it and
she gets mad at me.
Speaker 5 (05:47):
She's like, you don't have to do that. I can
do it.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
I'm like, yeah, but I have to fix it when
it breaks. So I'm just going to try. And you know,
triage my problems. Uh eating off your plate, your wife
eating off your plate, or your spouse eating off your plate.
Speaker 6 (06:03):
I don't do that.
Speaker 5 (06:04):
You don't like you've learned or no.
Speaker 4 (06:06):
I just I've never I've never been one to do that,
primarily mostly because my husband will say, hey, do you
want to try this? And I'll say yes or no.
But he does it to me all the time, and
truth be told, it kind of pisses me off sometimes
because I am the type of person that will save
a bite like that one looks really good, I'm gonna save.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
It for last, and he'll take that by saying that one.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
Hold on, how do you save a certain bite? How
is one bite better than the other?
Speaker 5 (06:37):
Like aesthetics.
Speaker 4 (06:38):
It just especially when it's a steak, like if it
looks like the perfect medium rare.
Speaker 5 (06:44):
Huh yeah, not much fed on it?
Speaker 1 (06:47):
Yes, you and I surprise you and I run it
different octaves because I'm like, I may have a heart
attack before I get to that bite, So I'm just
gonna eat it now.
Speaker 5 (06:56):
That's the way I think. Obviously, not a heart attack,
but like, make it happen. You can be a fire like.
I don't want to wait. I don't know if it
will be much better later.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
The bites are just as good now, but I'll phrase,
you know, save the best for last.
Speaker 4 (07:11):
Right, I'm picking up that's not really a thing, or
I could have just eyeballed it and like, oh, that's
going to be my next brighte and then here I
see his fat damn.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Sometimes plans out ever you live in the future. Do
you eat around your plate? Or do you eat one
thing and then move on to the next thing? I know,
I change it up. Eat around the plate? Yeah, GIMPI uh,
beat around the plate? Are you one thing at a time?
Most of the time, I'm I'm fifty to fifty on it.
Speaker 5 (07:43):
Yeah I am, I really am. French fries are good.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
They're only good for thirty seconds, though, but yeah, it
depends on how I feel. I hate giving a fucking
Lindsay answer, but it's the truth.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Sometimes I'll eat all my vegetables or all of my
fucking mashed potatoes first and then move on to whatever else.
Speaker 5 (08:00):
And then sometimes I'm just it just depends on how
I feel about it.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
Yeah, I'm I stay in one zone and then move
on kind of guy. I don't know why. I think
it's just what I do. Occasionally I'll try to do
the perfect bite or whatever and mix things. But now, man,
I will eat my steak, I'll eat my green bans,
I'll eat my mashed potatoes. Occasionally the steak will make
it into the mash potatoes or whatever. But now, this
is another one that drives me so baddy. Some of
(08:23):
these ones I mentioned, I don't show a nervous tick,
but this one I will show a nervous tick when
it's happening. And that is the way people get butter
out of a tub. Everybody in my family button me
digs into the butter with a knife, fucking diggers like
they're splunking the butter and does a giant hole or
it looks like they've been stabbing it. Poor but drives
(08:48):
me so crazy. It might be one of my top
things that drives me crazy. You have to scrape, Yes, scrape, but.
Speaker 6 (08:59):
It doesn't look like spend murder.
Speaker 5 (09:00):
Yeah, yes, are you a stabber?
Speaker 6 (09:03):
I'm not.
Speaker 5 (09:04):
I'm more of a judgment Look made me feel like
you were.
Speaker 6 (09:07):
No, I'm more of a scraper.
Speaker 4 (09:09):
Or if I know I'm going to be using a
lot for a recipe or something, I will go to
one end of the tub and take you know, I
might have to you don't, Yeah, I do sticks.
Speaker 5 (09:23):
Yeah see.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
I keep to keep uh margarine and butter stick butter
for cooking and then margarine. You know, country crock for
toast biscuits.
Speaker 5 (09:33):
Yeah, I might.
Speaker 6 (09:34):
We might have a country a country crock.
Speaker 4 (09:37):
Or I can't believe it's not butter, just for an
emergency situation if we're out of butter.
Speaker 5 (09:42):
Sorry, anytime I hear I can't believe it's not butter.
That's what I think of fabio. Yes, here's another one.
The way they close chip bags.
Speaker 4 (09:52):
Oh my gosh, that drives me crazy. I have chip
clips in my house for a reason. Freaking use them.
Speaker 5 (10:00):
Don't use them at all.
Speaker 4 (10:00):
They'll just crinkle up the bag and then shove it
in the pantry and then I go in there and
there's an open bag of chips, and you go in
and it's stale yep. And right here to the right
of the door, on the door there is chip clips
all lined up. Use them, fuckers, Come on there.
Speaker 6 (10:17):
My god.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
There's a trick a way to roll it if you
don't have chip clips, and it's kind of I don't
know if you guys know where this.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Yeah, yeah, you just fold the ends right like a
paper airplane and then it tucks into itself.
Speaker 5 (10:30):
Yeah. But I doubt these children are doing that.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
Though, because they've never been taught Corbin the fucking clip
Nazi over here, you know, And now they're fucking bucking
up against the system like so much.
Speaker 5 (10:45):
It's a goddamn bag of chips.
Speaker 4 (10:46):
It's not that serious, it's like, but it's like throwing
away money or no. Or they'll leave them out, or
they'll leave them out and the dog will get the
bag and you'll find the bag outside all chewed up
because he's gotten to it.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
What pisses me off the most this, if we're on
this whole chip hatred thing, is improper opening of the chip,
you know, instead of opening it up properly and having
that nice gash it to the top of it it
fucking splits.
Speaker 5 (11:15):
Down the side.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
Yeah, Or when it comes to the bag cereal, instead
of opening that one properly because you know it has
the reseealable Yeah, they'll take scissors and just cut the whole.
Speaker 6 (11:26):
Damn bag open. I'm like, are you fucking kidding me?
Speaker 5 (11:29):
Yeah? It does.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
That does get me a little twisted up when it
splits down the side and I just get a ziplock
and dump it in there. I'll do that too, But
I know fantypically, Yeah, I typically don't get all worked
up about potato chips because I don't know. I just
picked my battles. I'm going in all all in on butter.
I'm not going in all all in on chips, right,
I'm really I'm willing to fucking fight the family on butter.
Speaker 6 (11:52):
That's why.
Speaker 5 (11:54):
They do they put the clip on those.
Speaker 6 (11:57):
Literally, Yeah, no, they don't, they don't.
Speaker 5 (12:00):
They don't even do that.
Speaker 3 (12:03):
Clips are non existent in that house. To the rest
of the family. Uh, let's see, what was the last one.
There was another one here I didn't see. I always
love when you cliche.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
You see women complain about husbands leaving their food, their
clothes on the on the.
Speaker 5 (12:18):
On the ground, or not making the hamper.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
Yeah, and then you turn to like their side of
the bathroom and their ship everywhere, Hell.
Speaker 5 (12:25):
Yeah, counting and off whatever.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
They're right about the closet, but they failed to recognize
the bathroom panties soaking in the motherfucking sink.
Speaker 5 (12:36):
What nasties.
Speaker 4 (12:38):
But my counter sink does have my cosmetics all over
the place.
Speaker 6 (12:44):
It does, I'm guilty of it.
Speaker 5 (12:45):
Do you ever complain about stuff not making in the hamper?
Speaker 6 (12:48):
Yeah? I used to do that a lot.
Speaker 5 (12:51):
Used to it yesterday. He's getting better at it. Are
he doesn't have to get better at it? You're not
getting better at it?
Speaker 6 (12:58):
No, But he doesn't use my think, so you know
it's not a big deal.
Speaker 3 (13:02):
Well, you guys have been married for fucking coon's age, right,
will what do you got core?
Speaker 1 (13:05):
Fifteen? Fifteen and you lindsay seventeen? Is there ever a
point in time where it's just like, fuck it? It
is what it is. I'm gonna leave my makeup all
over the county. You're not gonna pick up your fucking
dirty's doun to wear off there. And he's just leaving
me under, okay, just curious. I listen, there's a difference
between joking about it in here and me complaining to
my wife. I do not complain to my wife about
(13:27):
fucking hair. Sure we'll talk about it and laugh or whatever,
but we're both no that. Like, listen, I'm a fucking idiot.
I'm gonna leave the light switches a certain way. I'm
gonna go around and turn the screws so they're all
right side up, like it's just who I fucking am.
Speaker 4 (13:41):
Yeah, he'll say something to me, like if I'm in
the shower he'll come in, or or if I'm getting ready,
he'll go, hey, thanks for throwing away your hair, and
I'm like, oh.
Speaker 6 (13:50):
You're welcome, like that's that's about it.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
Or there'll be some days where I'll go, hey, can
you grab the garbage can and I will clean out
the drain in our shower and holy shit, I will
pull out what looks like this.
Speaker 6 (14:03):
A rat out of that joint.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
Yeah, that's you, and he will oh yeah, and he
will grab me the garbage can and I will throw
it away and he will oh my god, like he'll
like get sick, yeah, because it's so gross.
Speaker 6 (14:15):
And it is disgusting. Yeah, but that's why I do it.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
No, you do it because it's yours, right, Yeah, I
hate this take. You're not doing anything special. It's your responsibility.
It's your responsibility to clean up after yourself.
Speaker 2 (14:31):
I mean, he has hair too, do you?
Speaker 5 (14:34):
You should separate it.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
Then separate the hairs, right, just sit down, take that
clump of hair and be like, all the long strands
obviously or hers, and all the short curly ones are
obviously his. It is literally the weakest argument ever that
he has hair too, and that's causing a goddamn's rats nest.
He doesn't have long enough hair. Men don't shed hair
(14:57):
like women do. It is oh my god. And even
then you're not doing it. He's bringing you the fucking trash.
Speaker 5 (15:05):
Can I think I touched something? It's just a job. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
As far as like those type of things go, I'm
of the attitude of it is what it is. If
I want the dishes a certain way, I just fucking
do it right. My wife will like, the dishwasher will
be open, I'm loading the dishwasher, and she just will
put a fucking dish in the sink. And I look
around and I'm like you know, the fucking door's open
right here. You you can just put it in the
fucking scenk or in the dishwasher, that type of but
(15:35):
it's it is what it is. That is hardly a
thing I know that I don't sleep on some people
or that's how they are. It's like just bitch, bitch,
bitch at each other. You didn't pick it, mocking clothes,
you didn't clon their So I was just curious. Yeah,
I have a theory that those are people that are
settled and they're looking for reasons to not be happy
(15:55):
with them.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
Okay, that's fair. That that that make that feel rational
to them, okay, instead of just accepting it for what
it is.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
Right, Well, they're just so unhappy with the person I
need evidence to back up my dislike, that's fair, that's fair, right,
things that because it really doesn't matter if he leaves
closing the dishwasher, if she leaves hair in the sea
are on the floor, and she leaves hair in the sink, like,
it doesn't ultimately matter. That's that's just a person being
a person. But if you fucking hate somebody and you
(16:23):
have contempt for them, that is a logical reason to
slice their fucking head off.
Speaker 5 (16:29):
That makes sense, right.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
It's like women that are like, oh, he chews so loud?
Are you fucking serious with that?
Speaker 5 (16:35):
I kind of can't be in annoying sometimes, Sure it
is if you don't like the person.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
I've got a good friend of mine that is, he's
a smack chewer, and I'm just like.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
Oh God, different, Please, It's a friend. It's not somebody
you're having sex with.
Speaker 5 (16:51):
That is true, that you know anymore. Listen, I know you,
I know your type. That ship is right, it's one
time in college, right.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
A few years after Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:06):
I Ultimately I heard this thing yesterday about marriage, and
I think it's it makes complete sense, and that is
that when you're married to somebody, it has to be
about that it that it is. It has to be
your favorite person. Okay, it doesn't be somebody you're in
love with, yes, but it's not that's that is such.
Speaker 5 (17:29):
A generic thing. It has to be your favorite person.
Speaker 1 (17:31):
Somebody you don't mind being with constantly, better than that
putting up being around there. It has to be your
favorite person above everything and anything. And when it's your
favorite person, you don't give a shit about loud chewing
or farting or right, you know, if anything, you get
upset or have contempt when they're not giving you more love, right,
(17:53):
that type of thing, that's sure. But ultimately if you love,
so that's how I know people are in love. They
look past all that shit. They do not fall care
right right when they're like, he's great now, but he
leaves his and I'm just using it as a cliche
thing he leaves his his clothes all over the floor.
Or she doesn't throw the Amazon boxes out, Yeah.
Speaker 5 (18:11):
That's just whose the fuck she is?
Speaker 4 (18:13):
Man?
Speaker 6 (18:13):
All right?
Speaker 1 (18:14):
My wife is the typical woman when it comes to
She will not break down a box to save her
fucking life. If the house was on fire and the
way to put the fire out was to break the
boxes down, she'd be like, well, this was a good house,
Why we fucking had it. She just can't fucking do it.
And I just know it's not a big deal. I
(18:34):
kind of like the fucking challenge if I'm being honest, right, right.
Speaker 4 (18:37):
And my husband loves when I don't break the Amazon
boxes down, or if I break them down and then
save them for him, because he uses he reuses them
to either clean fish on them after fishing or cut
up a venison dear me, you know.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
So he's like, yeah, don't say it.
Speaker 6 (18:59):
Thanks for it for me.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
Butcher paper is yeah, yeah, it really is. I mean
you could just use newspaper.
Speaker 5 (19:08):
Then you've got fucking dagwood on your fish filet and
it doesn't work out.
Speaker 3 (19:15):
Blondie, right right, we're gonna have contin What is this
Family Circus?
Speaker 5 (19:20):
I just had a dream about Family Circus the cartoon.
But I don't know.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
I just when you said it, it popped in my
brain and I was like, why am I dreaming about
Family Circus? I can't name a goddamn character. I just
see the Oval cartoon and and that's it. A little
short haired kid that I just assume is blonde. Yeah,
they're all at black and white.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
You know, they're in color.
Speaker 5 (19:43):
Some of them aren't. Call Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Do you remember Aaron on the office She replaced Pam
at the front door.
Speaker 6 (19:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Yes, So she's in a Cole's commercial now and she
looks just like uh Kathy the comic book.
Speaker 3 (20:00):
Yeah, you're right, yeah, because Kathy was chunky love man.
Speaker 1 (20:05):
Yeah you can tell. And she had like eight cats. Yeah,
she looked like she looks like she.
Speaker 5 (20:11):
Smelled like cats.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
I think ultimately she did have cats, if I remember,
I think so, if I remember correctly, I was trying
to find a commercial.
Speaker 5 (20:20):
Yeah, are we talking about Aaron from Cats? No?
Speaker 1 (20:25):
No, no, because that was the other that was the
other character, fucking what's your name? The one that worked
in accounting and whatever, the blonde. Yeah, yeah, she had cats.
Speaker 5 (20:33):
So like this is totally perfect.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
So there's Kathy, right, yes, and then there's the girl
from the office. Yeah, yeah, commercial exactly a lot, that's
what they're going for. So my daughter or my wife,
I was like, she looks like Kathy, and my wife goes,
who the fuck's Kathy?
Speaker 5 (20:56):
You fuck her?
Speaker 1 (20:56):
I'm like no, no's like no, no, no, no, I'm
like Kathy the cartoon. She goes, I don't know what
you're talking about. Why did she not have the comics?
No new, no, no new that poor soul.
Speaker 5 (21:12):
She knew they.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Didn't have a TV in the summer. In the summer,
the TV got put unplugged and put away.
Speaker 3 (21:18):
Go outside. Don't be sitting in here all fucking day
watching television. You ain't gonna learn nothing from Jerry Springer.
Speaker 5 (21:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
Yeah, wow, that's my but still even then comics. I mean,
I guess not everybody got the newspaper.
Speaker 5 (21:31):
No, I mean you.
Speaker 1 (21:32):
She could listen to music, but it had to be
like Amy Grant, term Michael Thomas or whatever, some Christian
artists or whatever back in the day. There, it is right,
that was okay, okay, but there was there was no TV.
I mean even TV was super limited. There was no Simpsons.
Speaker 5 (21:49):
Oh no, oh.
Speaker 3 (21:51):
No, we would we couldn't watch the Simpsons. Beavis and
butt Head would never have fucking entered my parents' house.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
When we do a story or we talk about some
kids saying bad word or something like that, it's at
school or whatever, I always remember Cawabunga dude and how
the outrage people had against Cowabunga dude.
Speaker 5 (22:08):
And when you think about it, that's so good.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
Obviously that was stupid at the time, but so is
getting mad at any other word, right, right, Hey, Cawabunca
dude is eat my shorts. Eat my shorts. Don't have
a cow man, Don't I had a horrible kid. You're like,
I'd take I'd love to have a fucking bart as
my kid. Real compared to those little South Park bitches,
for any other Yeah.
Speaker 6 (22:33):
My shorts. You're basically saying fuck off.
Speaker 5 (22:37):
Right now? They say fun off right right? Eat my shorts? Stupid.
Speaker 1 (22:43):
They SpongeBob with tartar sauce. We all know what that means. SpongeBob.
Speaker 5 (22:49):
Yeah, a little inn window joke. Sure, and another thing.
Speaker 3 (22:52):
And I said it the other day and it took
me back, and I believe the only character that I
ever said it was Gargamel could have been a curses
foiled again. Remember that phrase?
Speaker 5 (23:03):
You hear it in cartoons again?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
And it was just recently when it hit me when
they said curses. Well, can't say fucking cartoons, right, So
they say curses?
Speaker 5 (23:14):
Why because they're curse words?
Speaker 6 (23:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (23:17):
Uh, Toy Story has a ton of innuindos in the aea.
It's perverted as you know Disney characters.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
These and this is a list of Toy Story moments
that are actually for adults. Uh. Well, I'm going for
fearsome here, but I just don't feel it. I think
I'm just coming off as annoying. That was a Rex
one a little This was bo Peep. What do you
say I get someone else to watch the Sheep tonight? Yeah,
she was a horror man she was woody. Tuesday Night's
(23:45):
Plastic Coersion Awareness meeting was I think a big success.
Sure these are this is a horrible list, But what
if Andy gets another dinosaur, A mean one. I just
don't think I could take that kind of rejection.
Speaker 5 (23:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (23:59):
Yeah, And there was a where Buzz his his uh.
I think when he first sees little bo peep and
his pat goes up.
Speaker 6 (24:09):
Waiting a boner. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Yeah, those things are far more concerning. Like my daughter's
at that age, like if something happens like that and
I laughed, she's like, wait, what's funny?
Speaker 5 (24:21):
She's picking up on that.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
But no, she just wants to know, Like she loves laughing.
She was brushing her teeth and we were in the
kitchen and she heard me laugh and she came in
afterwards She's like, what were you guys laughing at?
Speaker 5 (24:31):
I'm like, I don't remember. She's like, I just want
to know.
Speaker 6 (24:35):
What was it?
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Like, I don't remember, babe, I'm sorry, what was it?
You're like, oh fuck, I'm sorry, I don't remember. Literally,
now you learn and keep your laughs, do you so? Yeah, no,
you just don't laugh.
Speaker 6 (24:48):
You just gotta have some dad jokes in your back pop.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
Oh, ready to go, those have already been exhausted, those
are already like I already get the eye roll new ones.
She's reading this book and in the book, the main
character is a girl and she.
Speaker 5 (25:02):
Goes to a private school.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
But the dad is a bug exterminator and he sprays
for bugs, and that's how she got to go to
that school because he has a contract with them in
an exchange for doing the bugs right. But normally he
comes with his van with the bug on it in
the evening, so he's never there with the kids right,
So they can't make the connection. And she tries to
leave for school really early so she can't have to
(25:24):
be in the bus right, or can't be in this
van with a giant cockroach on it because she's humiliated,
and so apparently there was a bug problem. They had
to call the dad to come, and she was so
nervous and upset because she envisions her dad's spraying for
bugs like dancing and being embarrassing and I just can't fucking.
Speaker 5 (25:41):
Wait to do that shit to her. Oh I can't wait.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
Are you kidding me? That is a core memory? Oh yeah,
that'll be right now. Embarrassing one hundred percent, one hundred percent.
But when they get older and look back, she'll.
Speaker 5 (25:55):
Be like, that was pretty awesome.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
The dad totally danced, by the way, I dance about
as good as I sing. Oh yeah, you and Ellen
DeGeneres not at all. No, she's got more rhythm than
I do, and she don't have rhythm. Have you seen
her skincare commercial? Yeah, it's so uncomfortable. Oh yeah, like
you look funny? Is that what you're using? Because that
shit ain't fucking work, dude. She's blossomed out, so in
(26:18):
camera work, there's a way to adjust the camera to
make wrinkles and things go to go away, and she's blocking.
That's why it looks kind of haloish on her face,
like she's glowing because they've turned it up so much
to cover up how bad her skin. She's got horrendous skin.
Speaker 5 (26:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Look, she's like sixty nine or something. When you stopped
drinking that baby's blood. Right, here's a woman who was
like on top of the world, right, that show was untouchable. Yeah,
and then one person's like you're you're fired, and she's like, listen,
I'm gonna tell every motherfucker how bad you suck.
Speaker 5 (26:51):
You're a fucking kind.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
And they're like, go ahead, I'm untouched. I'm Ellen and
then copp Now you're doing commercials for shitty skin. Now
you live in England on a horse ranch. Yeah, doing
skin commercials at three am to Corbin and GIMPI does
anybody with bad skin really take advantage of those at
(27:14):
three am? I can't imagine they do. I don't think
so maybe some some. I've tried everything I could. I've
tried everything. I've cucumbers on the eyes, fucking seamen, I've
done it all. You know again, go back to the
Rainbow lounge. Listen, this isn't the old days, all right,
(27:35):
we got to take off. You guys have a fantastic week.
And sorry for last week with no podcast. We had
the technical problems and if I'm being honest, I was
so crispy I couldn't have done.
Speaker 5 (27:44):
A podcast, so, uh, sorry about that. But we'll get
back on the regiment now. So you guys have a
great week.
Speaker 6 (27:49):
See yuh boy,
So I found this list of annoying habits women do
that irritate their partners. Yeah, so I'm interested if Lindsay
does these or do we think they're irritating Okay, okay
somebody this person says their girlfriend doesn't eat the egg
part of the egg. They eat the white part and
(00:35):
not the yolk. Okay, so weird eating habits.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Yeah, I eat the whole egg. I love eggs.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
I don't see any problem with that because some people
are just egg whites only.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
Yeah, just eat buy egg whites then. Yeah, the oolk
is literally the best part it is, I get it.
If you want egg whites, that's fine. Just eat egg whites. Now.
Speaker 4 (00:55):
I will save the yolk for the last part, because,
like you just said, it's the best part.
Speaker 5 (00:59):
I gotta cut it and mix it up.
Speaker 4 (01:01):
Hey, that too sometimes, but I like to dunk my
toast in the in the yellow yolk, and sometimes my bacon.
Speaker 5 (01:09):
How Norman Rockwell of you.
Speaker 4 (01:11):
Yeah, if I'm eating waffles, I'll dip my waffle in
the yolk.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
Why because it's so damn syrup. It's not better than syrup.
It's true when it comes to waffles, and like pancakes
and shit. Uh yeah, yeah, that's gross. Biscuits and toast
is the only thing you should be stopping up egg
yolks with. So do you not put syrup on your
I do, and then you also dip it in the
egg yolk.
Speaker 5 (01:33):
Sometimes it's all cool dum exactly.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
This person says their wife will put like tubs or
baskets on the stairs to store stuff in so she
doesn't have to take it all the way upstairs.
Speaker 5 (01:47):
She's expecting him to take it upstairs.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
I don't think that's This isn't an Amazon box, but
I understand what you're a point you're making.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
No, that just clutters up the stairway.
Speaker 5 (01:56):
I agree, I agree.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
That would bother.
Speaker 5 (01:59):
That's out of me.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
That uh, the way their partner puts in fills the dishwasher.
Speaker 5 (02:05):
Yeah, no, there are some people that don't know what
the hell they're doing.
Speaker 6 (02:09):
I know that annoys you.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
It doesn't annoy me, But I accept people's faults, like
it's okay to admit you don't know how to do it.
Speaker 5 (02:18):
Yeah, are the dishes in the dishwasher?
Speaker 4 (02:20):
Yes, okay, I'll rearrange it if I can see that
there's room for more, if you if we do it like.
Speaker 5 (02:27):
This, right.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
That's mostly my thing is I don't want to have
to hand do dishes or leave them in the scene.
Speaker 4 (02:33):
My thing is my husband will He'll rinse off the
dishes and then stack them on the counter. And I'm like, bro,
what is this? But I didn't you to put them
in the freaking dishwasher.
Speaker 5 (02:43):
You just do dishes. Then if that's the way it's
gonna be, then you fucking do the dishes. Yeah, I
don't mind. That sounds like a great idea. Yeah, I'm
completely okay with it. Then you're not bitching it me
for the way I put them in the dishwasher. Yeah,
that problems solved.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
The the The other thing too, that's really fascinating about
the dishwasher is that I can run it as much
as I want. I love running it twice in a
day is like, man, Pinnacle day.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
It's not the it's not the amount of water that
it uses that gets me.
Speaker 5 (03:14):
It's just the soup. Yeah. I go through, you know,
twice as much dishwasher detergent. Yeah, you know.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
And for me and me personally, I'm like, fuck, I'm out.
I gotta wait a half a week to go get
some more soap.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Okay, do you use the dishwasher pods for the gel?
Speaker 5 (03:32):
The pods, that's the only way to do it.
Speaker 4 (03:34):
Yeah, I use the pods too, but I'm thinking about
switching to the gel because I have glasses that have
designs on them and the designs seem to be fading.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
Yeah, because you have to hand wash them. Yeah, those
are not dishwashers safe. Boy.
Speaker 5 (03:49):
I tell you what. I got a couple of shot glasses.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
They were fucking cool as too, man, and we use
them and I put them in the dishwasher and I
fucking next day I pull them out to put them
up fucking on.
Speaker 5 (04:00):
They're just clear shot. I was so pissed up.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
There are just some things that are supposed to be
hand washed when we buy, like glasses to have cocktails in,
or wineglasses. If it says hand wash only, nope, But
I try really hard not to buy that stuff.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
But a lot of them all say dishwashers sand yep.
Speaker 5 (04:18):
Yeah, it's how they get you.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Well, they may say that, but if they're etched or whatever,
that negates that. This person says their partner goes through
a tube of toothpaste every few days. I'm not this bad.
But I don't fuck around with my toothpaste. I'm not
gonna be like I gotta get another penny out of it, Like,
fuck off, I'll just open another tube. Say they go
through a tube of toothpaste every couple of days.
Speaker 5 (04:42):
That's what this says. Well, one, how small are these
tubes of toothpaste? Or two? How much fuck a toothpaste?
Speaker 1 (04:48):
Are you?
Speaker 5 (04:48):
Are you eating it?
Speaker 6 (04:49):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (04:50):
Yeah, I know?
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Is it a travel size?
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Right? That's the one thing that makes And if that's
the case, bro, buy a bigger tube of toothpaste, it'll
last longer.
Speaker 5 (05:01):
Don't just bite your cheap ass.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Another one is when girls don't clean their hair up
in the shower.
Speaker 5 (05:09):
Oh, when they cling it to the wall something like that. Yeah, yeah,
that's name.
Speaker 4 (05:14):
I'm guilty of this every woman. But I will eventually
clean it. I love that word eventually.
Speaker 5 (05:20):
I gotta give it to my girlfriend. She does.
Speaker 3 (05:23):
She is not a hairclumper, and if she is, she's
fucking cleaning it up. Because the times that she's taking
a shower at my house, which has been quite a
bit we've been together almost two years now, I have
never once seen a fucking wad of hair stuck to
the wall in the shower.
Speaker 5 (05:37):
Yeah. My, it's that in the sinks. That hair ends
up in the sink and then it's.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
Clogged, and I just I've just started grabbing it and
she gets mad at me.
Speaker 5 (05:47):
She's like, you don't have to do that. I can
do it.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
I'm like, yeah, but I have to fix it when
it breaks. So I'm just going to try. And you know,
triage my problems. Uh eating off your plate, your wife
eating off your plate, or your spouse eating off your plate.
Speaker 6 (06:03):
I don't do that.
Speaker 5 (06:04):
You don't like you've learned or no.
Speaker 4 (06:06):
I just I've never I've never been one to do that,
primarily mostly because my husband will say, hey, do you
want to try this? And I'll say yes or no.
But he does it to me all the time, and
truth be told, it kind of pisses me off sometimes
because I am the type of person that will save
a bite like that one looks really good, I'm gonna save.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
It for last, and he'll take that by saying that one.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
Hold on, how do you save a certain bite? How
is one bite better than the other?
Speaker 5 (06:37):
Like aesthetics.
Speaker 4 (06:38):
It just especially when it's a steak, like if it
looks like the perfect medium rare.
Speaker 5 (06:44):
Huh yeah, not much fed on it?
Speaker 1 (06:47):
Yes, you and I surprise you and I run it
different octaves because I'm like, I may have a heart
attack before I get to that bite, So I'm just
gonna eat it now.
Speaker 5 (06:56):
That's the way I think. Obviously, not a heart attack,
but like, make it happen. You can be a fire like.
I don't want to wait. I don't know if it
will be much better later.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
The bites are just as good now, but I'll phrase,
you know, save the best for last.
Speaker 4 (07:11):
Right, I'm picking up that's not really a thing, or
I could have just eyeballed it and like, oh, that's
going to be my next brighte and then here I
see his fat damn.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Sometimes plans out ever you live in the future. Do
you eat around your plate? Or do you eat one
thing and then move on to the next thing? I know,
I change it up. Eat around the plate? Yeah, GIMPI uh,
beat around the plate? Are you one thing at a time?
Most of the time, I'm I'm fifty to fifty on it.
Speaker 5 (07:43):
Yeah I am, I really am. French fries are good.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
They're only good for thirty seconds, though, but yeah, it
depends on how I feel. I hate giving a fucking
Lindsay answer, but it's the truth.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Sometimes I'll eat all my vegetables or all of my
fucking mashed potatoes first and then move on to whatever else.
Speaker 5 (08:00):
And then sometimes I'm just it just depends on how
I feel about it.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
Yeah, I'm I stay in one zone and then move
on kind of guy. I don't know why. I think
it's just what I do. Occasionally I'll try to do
the perfect bite or whatever and mix things. But now, man,
I will eat my steak, I'll eat my green bans,
I'll eat my mashed potatoes. Occasionally the steak will make
it into the mash potatoes or whatever. But now, this
is another one that drives me so baddy. Some of
(08:23):
these ones I mentioned, I don't show a nervous tick,
but this one I will show a nervous tick when
it's happening. And that is the way people get butter
out of a tub. Everybody in my family button me
digs into the butter with a knife, fucking diggers like
they're splunking the butter and does a giant hole or
it looks like they've been stabbing it. Poor but drives
(08:48):
me so crazy. It might be one of my top
things that drives me crazy. You have to scrape, Yes, scrape, but.
Speaker 6 (08:59):
It doesn't look like spend murder.
Speaker 5 (09:00):
Yeah, yes, are you a stabber?
Speaker 6 (09:03):
I'm not.
Speaker 5 (09:04):
I'm more of a judgment Look made me feel like
you were.
Speaker 6 (09:07):
No, I'm more of a scraper.
Speaker 4 (09:09):
Or if I know I'm going to be using a
lot for a recipe or something, I will go to
one end of the tub and take you know, I
might have to you don't, Yeah, I do sticks.
Speaker 5 (09:23):
Yeah see.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
I keep to keep uh margarine and butter stick butter
for cooking and then margarine. You know, country crock for
toast biscuits.
Speaker 5 (09:33):
Yeah, I might.
Speaker 6 (09:34):
We might have a country a country crock.
Speaker 4 (09:37):
Or I can't believe it's not butter, just for an
emergency situation if we're out of butter.
Speaker 5 (09:42):
Sorry, anytime I hear I can't believe it's not butter.
That's what I think of fabio. Yes, here's another one.
The way they close chip bags.
Speaker 4 (09:52):
Oh my gosh, that drives me crazy. I have chip
clips in my house for a reason. Freaking use them.
Speaker 5 (10:00):
Don't use them at all.
Speaker 4 (10:00):
They'll just crinkle up the bag and then shove it
in the pantry and then I go in there and
there's an open bag of chips, and you go in
and it's stale yep. And right here to the right
of the door, on the door there is chip clips
all lined up. Use them, fuckers, Come on there.
Speaker 6 (10:17):
My god.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
There's a trick a way to roll it if you
don't have chip clips, and it's kind of I don't
know if you guys know where this.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Yeah, yeah, you just fold the ends right like a
paper airplane and then it tucks into itself.
Speaker 5 (10:30):
Yeah. But I doubt these children are doing that.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
Though, because they've never been taught Corbin the fucking clip
Nazi over here, you know, And now they're fucking bucking
up against the system like so much.
Speaker 5 (10:45):
It's a goddamn bag of chips.
Speaker 4 (10:46):
It's not that serious, it's like, but it's like throwing
away money or no. Or they'll leave them out, or
they'll leave them out and the dog will get the
bag and you'll find the bag outside all chewed up
because he's gotten to it.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
What pisses me off the most this, if we're on
this whole chip hatred thing, is improper opening of the chip,
you know, instead of opening it up properly and having
that nice gash it to the top of it it
fucking splits.
Speaker 5 (11:15):
Down the side.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
Yeah, Or when it comes to the bag cereal, instead
of opening that one properly because you know it has
the reseealable Yeah, they'll take scissors and just cut the whole.
Speaker 6 (11:26):
Damn bag open. I'm like, are you fucking kidding me?
Speaker 5 (11:29):
Yeah? It does.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
That does get me a little twisted up when it
splits down the side and I just get a ziplock
and dump it in there. I'll do that too, But
I know fantypically, Yeah, I typically don't get all worked
up about potato chips because I don't know. I just
picked my battles. I'm going in all all in on butter.
I'm not going in all all in on chips, right,
I'm really I'm willing to fucking fight the family on butter.
Speaker 6 (11:52):
That's why.
Speaker 5 (11:54):
They do they put the clip on those.
Speaker 6 (11:57):
Literally, Yeah, no, they don't, they don't.
Speaker 5 (12:00):
They don't even do that.
Speaker 3 (12:03):
Clips are non existent in that house. To the rest
of the family. Uh, let's see, what was the last one.
There was another one here I didn't see. I always
love when you cliche.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
You see women complain about husbands leaving their food, their
clothes on the on the.
Speaker 5 (12:18):
On the ground, or not making the hamper.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
Yeah, and then you turn to like their side of
the bathroom and their ship everywhere, Hell.
Speaker 5 (12:25):
Yeah, counting and off whatever.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
They're right about the closet, but they failed to recognize
the bathroom panties soaking in the motherfucking sink.
Speaker 5 (12:36):
What nasties.
Speaker 4 (12:38):
But my counter sink does have my cosmetics all over
the place.
Speaker 6 (12:44):
It does, I'm guilty of it.
Speaker 5 (12:45):
Do you ever complain about stuff not making in the hamper?
Speaker 6 (12:48):
Yeah? I used to do that a lot.
Speaker 5 (12:51):
Used to it yesterday. He's getting better at it. Are
he doesn't have to get better at it? You're not
getting better at it?
Speaker 6 (12:58):
No, But he doesn't use my think, so you know
it's not a big deal.
Speaker 3 (13:02):
Well, you guys have been married for fucking coon's age, right,
will what do you got core?
Speaker 1 (13:05):
Fifteen? Fifteen and you lindsay seventeen? Is there ever a
point in time where it's just like, fuck it? It
is what it is. I'm gonna leave my makeup all
over the county. You're not gonna pick up your fucking
dirty's doun to wear off there. And he's just leaving
me under, okay, just curious. I listen, there's a difference
between joking about it in here and me complaining to
my wife. I do not complain to my wife about
(13:27):
fucking hair. Sure we'll talk about it and laugh or whatever,
but we're both no that. Like, listen, I'm a fucking idiot.
I'm gonna leave the light switches a certain way. I'm
gonna go around and turn the screws so they're all
right side up, like it's just who I fucking am.
Speaker 4 (13:41):
Yeah, he'll say something to me, like if I'm in
the shower he'll come in, or or if I'm getting ready,
he'll go, hey, thanks for throwing away your hair, and
I'm like, oh.
Speaker 6 (13:50):
You're welcome, like that's that's about it.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
Or there'll be some days where I'll go, hey, can
you grab the garbage can and I will clean out
the drain in our shower and holy shit, I will
pull out what looks like this.
Speaker 6 (14:03):
A rat out of that joint.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
Yeah, that's you, and he will oh yeah, and he
will grab me the garbage can and I will throw
it away and he will oh my god, like he'll
like get sick, yeah, because it's so gross.
Speaker 6 (14:15):
And it is disgusting. Yeah, but that's why I do it.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
No, you do it because it's yours, right, Yeah, I
hate this take. You're not doing anything special. It's your responsibility.
It's your responsibility to clean up after yourself.
Speaker 2 (14:31):
I mean, he has hair too, do you?
Speaker 5 (14:34):
You should separate it.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
Then separate the hairs, right, just sit down, take that
clump of hair and be like, all the long strands
obviously or hers, and all the short curly ones are
obviously his. It is literally the weakest argument ever that
he has hair too, and that's causing a goddamn's rats nest.
He doesn't have long enough hair. Men don't shed hair
(14:57):
like women do. It is oh my god. And even
then you're not doing it. He's bringing you the fucking trash.
Speaker 5 (15:05):
Can I think I touched something? It's just a job. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
As far as like those type of things go, I'm
of the attitude of it is what it is. If
I want the dishes a certain way, I just fucking
do it right. My wife will like, the dishwasher will
be open, I'm loading the dishwasher, and she just will
put a fucking dish in the sink. And I look
around and I'm like you know, the fucking door's open
right here. You you can just put it in the
fucking scenk or in the dishwasher, that type of but
(15:35):
it's it is what it is. That is hardly a
thing I know that I don't sleep on some people
or that's how they are. It's like just bitch, bitch,
bitch at each other. You didn't pick it, mocking clothes,
you didn't clon their So I was just curious. Yeah,
I have a theory that those are people that are
settled and they're looking for reasons to not be happy
(15:55):
with them.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
Okay, that's fair. That that that make that feel rational
to them, okay, instead of just accepting it for what
it is.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
Right, Well, they're just so unhappy with the person I
need evidence to back up my dislike, that's fair, that's fair, right,
things that because it really doesn't matter if he leaves
closing the dishwasher, if she leaves hair in the sea
are on the floor, and she leaves hair in the sink, like,
it doesn't ultimately matter. That's that's just a person being
a person. But if you fucking hate somebody and you
(16:23):
have contempt for them, that is a logical reason to
slice their fucking head off.
Speaker 5 (16:29):
That makes sense, right.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
It's like women that are like, oh, he chews so loud?
Are you fucking serious with that?
Speaker 5 (16:35):
I kind of can't be in annoying sometimes, Sure it
is if you don't like the person.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
I've got a good friend of mine that is, he's
a smack chewer, and I'm just like.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
Oh God, different, Please, It's a friend. It's not somebody
you're having sex with.
Speaker 5 (16:51):
That is true, that you know anymore. Listen, I know you,
I know your type. That ship is right, it's one
time in college, right.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
A few years after Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:06):
I Ultimately I heard this thing yesterday about marriage, and
I think it's it makes complete sense, and that is
that when you're married to somebody, it has to be
about that it that it is. It has to be
your favorite person. Okay, it doesn't be somebody you're in
love with, yes, but it's not that's that is such.
Speaker 5 (17:29):
A generic thing. It has to be your favorite person.
Speaker 1 (17:31):
Somebody you don't mind being with constantly, better than that
putting up being around there. It has to be your
favorite person above everything and anything. And when it's your
favorite person, you don't give a shit about loud chewing
or farting or right, you know, if anything, you get
upset or have contempt when they're not giving you more love, right,
(17:53):
that type of thing, that's sure. But ultimately if you love,
so that's how I know people are in love. They
look past all that shit. They do not fall care
right right when they're like, he's great now, but he
leaves his and I'm just using it as a cliche
thing he leaves his his clothes all over the floor.
Or she doesn't throw the Amazon boxes out, Yeah.
Speaker 5 (18:11):
That's just whose the fuck she is?
Speaker 4 (18:13):
Man?
Speaker 6 (18:13):
All right?
Speaker 1 (18:14):
My wife is the typical woman when it comes to
She will not break down a box to save her
fucking life. If the house was on fire and the
way to put the fire out was to break the
boxes down, she'd be like, well, this was a good house,
Why we fucking had it. She just can't fucking do it.
And I just know it's not a big deal. I
(18:34):
kind of like the fucking challenge if I'm being honest, right, right.
Speaker 4 (18:37):
And my husband loves when I don't break the Amazon
boxes down, or if I break them down and then
save them for him, because he uses he reuses them
to either clean fish on them after fishing or cut
up a venison dear me, you know.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
So he's like, yeah, don't say it.
Speaker 6 (18:59):
Thanks for it for me.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
Butcher paper is yeah, yeah, it really is. I mean
you could just use newspaper.
Speaker 5 (19:08):
Then you've got fucking dagwood on your fish filet and
it doesn't work out.
Speaker 3 (19:15):
Blondie, right right, we're gonna have contin What is this
Family Circus?
Speaker 5 (19:20):
I just had a dream about Family Circus the cartoon.
But I don't know.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
I just when you said it, it popped in my
brain and I was like, why am I dreaming about
Family Circus? I can't name a goddamn character. I just
see the Oval cartoon and and that's it. A little
short haired kid that I just assume is blonde. Yeah,
they're all at black and white.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
You know, they're in color.
Speaker 5 (19:43):
Some of them aren't. Call Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Do you remember Aaron on the office She replaced Pam
at the front door.
Speaker 6 (19:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Yes, So she's in a Cole's commercial now and she
looks just like uh Kathy the comic book.
Speaker 3 (20:00):
Yeah, you're right, yeah, because Kathy was chunky love man.
Speaker 1 (20:05):
Yeah you can tell. And she had like eight cats. Yeah,
she looked like she looks like she.
Speaker 5 (20:11):
Smelled like cats.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
I think ultimately she did have cats, if I remember,
I think so, if I remember correctly, I was trying
to find a commercial.
Speaker 5 (20:20):
Yeah, are we talking about Aaron from Cats? No?
Speaker 1 (20:25):
No, no, because that was the other that was the
other character, fucking what's your name? The one that worked
in accounting and whatever, the blonde. Yeah, yeah, she had cats.
Speaker 5 (20:33):
So like this is totally perfect.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
So there's Kathy, right, yes, and then there's the girl
from the office. Yeah, yeah, commercial exactly a lot, that's
what they're going for. So my daughter or my wife,
I was like, she looks like Kathy, and my wife goes,
who the fuck's Kathy?
Speaker 5 (20:56):
You fuck her?
Speaker 1 (20:56):
I'm like no, no's like no, no, no, no, I'm
like Kathy the cartoon. She goes, I don't know what
you're talking about. Why did she not have the comics?
No new, no, no new that poor soul.
Speaker 5 (21:12):
She knew they.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Didn't have a TV in the summer. In the summer,
the TV got put unplugged and put away.
Speaker 3 (21:18):
Go outside. Don't be sitting in here all fucking day
watching television. You ain't gonna learn nothing from Jerry Springer.
Speaker 5 (21:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
Yeah, wow, that's my but still even then comics. I mean,
I guess not everybody got the newspaper.
Speaker 5 (21:31):
No, I mean you.
Speaker 1 (21:32):
She could listen to music, but it had to be
like Amy Grant, term Michael Thomas or whatever, some Christian
artists or whatever back in the day. There, it is right,
that was okay, okay, but there was there was no TV.
I mean even TV was super limited. There was no Simpsons.
Speaker 5 (21:49):
Oh no, oh.
Speaker 3 (21:51):
No, we would we couldn't watch the Simpsons. Beavis and
butt Head would never have fucking entered my parents' house.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
When we do a story or we talk about some
kids saying bad word or something like that, it's at
school or whatever, I always remember Cawabunga dude and how
the outrage people had against Cowabunga dude.
Speaker 5 (22:08):
And when you think about it, that's so good.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
Obviously that was stupid at the time, but so is
getting mad at any other word, right, right, Hey, Cawabunca
dude is eat my shorts. Eat my shorts. Don't have
a cow man, Don't I had a horrible kid. You're like,
I'd take I'd love to have a fucking bart as
my kid. Real compared to those little South Park bitches,
for any other Yeah.
Speaker 6 (22:33):
My shorts. You're basically saying fuck off.
Speaker 5 (22:37):
Right now? They say fun off right right? Eat my shorts? Stupid.
Speaker 1 (22:43):
They SpongeBob with tartar sauce. We all know what that means. SpongeBob.
Speaker 5 (22:49):
Yeah, a little inn window joke. Sure, and another thing.
Speaker 3 (22:52):
And I said it the other day and it took
me back, and I believe the only character that I
ever said it was Gargamel could have been a curses
foiled again. Remember that phrase?
Speaker 5 (23:03):
You hear it in cartoons again?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
And it was just recently when it hit me when
they said curses. Well, can't say fucking cartoons, right, So
they say curses?
Speaker 5 (23:14):
Why because they're curse words?
Speaker 6 (23:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (23:17):
Uh, Toy Story has a ton of innuindos in the aea.
It's perverted as you know Disney characters.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
These and this is a list of Toy Story moments
that are actually for adults. Uh. Well, I'm going for
fearsome here, but I just don't feel it. I think
I'm just coming off as annoying. That was a Rex
one a little This was bo Peep. What do you
say I get someone else to watch the Sheep tonight? Yeah,
she was a horror man she was woody. Tuesday Night's
(23:45):
Plastic Coersion Awareness meeting was I think a big success.
Sure these are this is a horrible list, But what
if Andy gets another dinosaur, A mean one. I just
don't think I could take that kind of rejection.
Speaker 5 (23:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (23:59):
Yeah, And there was a where Buzz his his uh.
I think when he first sees little bo peep and
his pat goes up.
Speaker 6 (24:09):
Waiting a boner. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Yeah, those things are far more concerning. Like my daughter's
at that age, like if something happens like that and
I laughed, she's like, wait, what's funny?
Speaker 5 (24:21):
She's picking up on that.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
But no, she just wants to know, Like she loves laughing.
She was brushing her teeth and we were in the
kitchen and she heard me laugh and she came in
afterwards She's like, what were you guys laughing at?
Speaker 5 (24:31):
I'm like, I don't remember. She's like, I just want
to know.
Speaker 6 (24:35):
What was it?
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Like, I don't remember, babe, I'm sorry, what was it?
You're like, oh fuck, I'm sorry, I don't remember. Literally,
now you learn and keep your laughs, do you so? Yeah, no,
you just don't laugh.
Speaker 6 (24:48):
You just gotta have some dad jokes in your back pop.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
Oh, ready to go, those have already been exhausted, those
are already like I already get the eye roll new ones.
She's reading this book and in the book, the main
character is a girl and she.
Speaker 5 (25:02):
Goes to a private school.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
But the dad is a bug exterminator and he sprays
for bugs, and that's how she got to go to
that school because he has a contract with them in
an exchange for doing the bugs right. But normally he
comes with his van with the bug on it in
the evening, so he's never there with the kids right,
So they can't make the connection. And she tries to
leave for school really early so she can't have to
(25:24):
be in the bus right, or can't be in this
van with a giant cockroach on it because she's humiliated,
and so apparently there was a bug problem. They had
to call the dad to come, and she was so
nervous and upset because she envisions her dad's spraying for
bugs like dancing and being embarrassing and I just can't fucking.
Speaker 5 (25:41):
Wait to do that shit to her. Oh I can't wait.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
Are you kidding me? That is a core memory? Oh yeah,
that'll be right now. Embarrassing one hundred percent, one hundred percent.
But when they get older and look back, she'll.
Speaker 5 (25:55):
Be like, that was pretty awesome.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
The dad totally danced, by the way, I dance about
as good as I sing. Oh yeah, you and Ellen
DeGeneres not at all. No, she's got more rhythm than
I do, and she don't have rhythm. Have you seen
her skincare commercial? Yeah, it's so uncomfortable. Oh yeah, like
you look funny? Is that what you're using? Because that
shit ain't fucking work, dude. She's blossomed out, so in
(26:18):
camera work, there's a way to adjust the camera to
make wrinkles and things go to go away, and she's blocking.
That's why it looks kind of haloish on her face,
like she's glowing because they've turned it up so much
to cover up how bad her skin. She's got horrendous skin.
Speaker 5 (26:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Look, she's like sixty nine or something. When you stopped
drinking that baby's blood. Right, here's a woman who was
like on top of the world, right, that show was untouchable. Yeah,
and then one person's like you're you're fired, and she's like, listen,
I'm gonna tell every motherfucker how bad you suck.
Speaker 5 (26:51):
You're a fucking kind.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
And they're like, go ahead, I'm untouched. I'm Ellen and
then copp Now you're doing commercials for shitty skin. Now
you live in England on a horse ranch. Yeah, doing
skin commercials at three am to Corbin and GIMPI does
anybody with bad skin really take advantage of those at
(27:14):
three am? I can't imagine they do. I don't think
so maybe some some. I've tried everything I could. I've
tried everything. I've cucumbers on the eyes, fucking seamen, I've
done it all. You know again, go back to the
Rainbow lounge. Listen, this isn't the old days, all right,
(27:35):
we got to take off. You guys have a fantastic week.
And sorry for last week with no podcast. We had
the technical problems and if I'm being honest, I was
so crispy I couldn't have done.
Speaker 5 (27:44):
A podcast, so, uh, sorry about that. But we'll get
back on the regiment now. So you guys have a
great week.
Speaker 6 (27:49):
See yuh boy,
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