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October 3, 2024 • 33 mins
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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, Michael, just curious, since you were in the Bush
White House during Katrina, how is it possible that our
government decides to want to give seven hundred and fifty
dollars to hurricane victims, meanwhile using FEMA funds for illegals
and still sending tax dollars to Ukraine. Is this even

(00:24):
possible or am I seeing just a bunch of crap?

Speaker 2 (00:28):
Oh, it's quite possible, and we're going to get to
that later in the program. I've I have I have
purposely refrained from saying anything about the response to Hurricane
Helene and the storm that subsequently hip parts of North Carolina.

(00:54):
But it's gotten to the point where I can no
longer keep quiet. So we'll we'll talk about it, but
we're into it later in the program because it's just
not it's not in my flow right now, so to speak.
So hang on and we'll get into that instead. Dragon's
got me off off track already this morning. You you
walked in here and you dropped a couple of things

(01:15):
that just irritate me.

Speaker 3 (01:18):
Oh good, then I did my job correct, That's right?

Speaker 2 (01:22):
Uh? I really uh I think the reason it look
I you know, Dragon, ID like to have fun, and
we talked. We talked about serious stuff. And so when
you when you tune into this program, you never really

(01:43):
know what you're going to get. And that's why you
have to you know that. That's why you should That's
why you should be a P one listener, and you
should listen for all four hours, because if you don't
like what we're saying, you know, one minute, you probably
won't like what we're saying the second minute or the
third minute, but maybe the fourth or fifth that you
might find something you actually like. So you just just

(02:03):
you have to stick around for a while. But these two, yeah,
I've already gotten text messages about that too. This one
hit me hard because it's easy to just gloss over.
But Colorado has once again made a top ten list. Yeah,

(02:25):
but let's back up before we get to Colorado. Now, this,
this study and this information comes from an organization whose
uh staff I know quite well, and they're they're very good,
and they are I would say truly while they while

(02:46):
all the individuals in this organization that I know are
truly right of center. Their their purpose in life is
to present objective and uh im arical data about things
that are going on and then we can make you know.
It's kind of what's what's the fox phrase we report

(03:06):
you decide or something. That's pretty much what they do,
and it's the Common Sense Institute. This is the story,
as reported by k d v R. The United States
saw a record number of human trafficking trafficking incidents last year.

(03:30):
Now let's just stop and think about that for a moment.
You know, we hear all this crap, I mean, utter
crap from Kamala Harris or Joe Biden or any number
of Democrats, you know, Maxine Waters, any just any of
these yahoos about slavery and the horrible treatment of black people,

(03:56):
you know, two hundred years ago, and how we need
to pay reparations, we need to do all of these
things to make up for what none of my ancestors,
none of them had anything to do with. And in fact,
if you'd like to get me off on a tangent
or on a tirade, let's talk about my grandfather. Let's

(04:20):
talk about my paternal grandfather, whose parents were part of
the Trail of Tears, who were forced to relocate from
North Carolina and moved over into Texas where they tried
to force them onto the Cherokee Reservation in Indian Territory.

(04:41):
My grandfather's parents and grandparents refused to sign what were
the DAWs Roles because they were forcibly removed from their
homes and then tried to forcibly put them onto reservations.

(05:02):
Maybe this is part of why why my DNA is
so anti authoritarian, and why I tend to be so
passive aggressive. It's just in my DNA, I think. But
my grandfather's parents, my great grandparents refuse Cherokee Indians refused
to sign what are called the Dawes Roles D A. W. E.
S and the DAWs rolls was was basically, do you

(05:25):
sign this paper We're going to give you, uh, you know,
small tract of land and Indian Indian Territory which is
now basically Oklahoma, and uh in exchange for that, you know,
you'll become wards of the state, so to speak. And
my great grandparents refuse to do that. Well, where are

(05:46):
my reparations, you know? Where we write me a big
fat government check. Now I'm not serious. I don't want one.
Do not do not misinterpret that whatsoever. The point I'm
trying to make is slavery is done mostly but Let's

(06:06):
not make this about blacks or Asians or Cherokee Indians,
and instead, let's make this about human beings the United States,
the United States of America. Now you're going to be
driving around today wherever you're listening to me. This doesn't
have to be Colorado. Wherever you're listening to me. Right now,

(06:28):
you're going to be driving around. Maybe you're going to
the grocery store, maybe you're going to work, maybe you're
maybe you're making a road trip. I want you to
look closely, very very closely at people that you might see.
Let's take it to Colorado. You probably have a place

(06:49):
like this in your city or your town. And you
know what, this doesn't have to be in the cities.
This can be happening in rural Colorado too. You can
be happening anywhere. It's right under our nose and we're
not paying any attention to it. You're driving along and
you see a young child, or for that matter, you

(07:14):
see someone you know that's you know, maybe in their
early twenties, and they're walking along with you know, just
something just doesn't seem right, or it may seem absolutely normal.
The thing is, you never know, You never know but

(07:34):
in this country, there were reported incidents of human trafficking
three one hundred and seventeen reported incidents in twenty twenty three.
That's an increase from twenty twenty two, from twenty nine
hundred and twenty one. Texas, not surprisingly, because of all

(07:56):
the border issues, Texas all the highest number far, five
hundred and twenty eight reported. Now I keep emphasizing reported,
because for every reported incident, there's probably one hundred non
reported incidents. So when Texas saw the highest number of
five hundred and twenty eight incidents of human trafficking, for

(08:20):
all we know there were five thousand. Now you might think, well,
that's no Michael, that you know, now you're exaggerating, because
how could there be you know, how could there be
ten times, you know, one hundred times. Well, when you
think about twelve million, fifteen million, twenty five million illegal
aliens coming into this country, you can't you cannot convince

(08:43):
me unless you can show me empirical data. You cannot
convince me that if there were thirty one hundred reported
incidents of human trafficking out of say and let's just
you know, twelve minute, let's let's just settle on twelve
million for today at a twelve million illegal aliens who
used mules or the cartels, or any number of illegal

(09:05):
ways to get across the Real Grande or wherever they crossed,
that there weren't more than thirty one hundred reported incidents
of or thirty one hundred incidents of human trafficking. You
just can't. You can't convince me that there weren't more
than that. Human trafficking the sale, the sale of a

(09:26):
human being to another human being for whatever purposes, slavery,
sex in the worst situations, put together a snuff film
to just enjoy the pleasure of murdering or getting them
addicted drugs, or forcing maths to sell drugs, or I mean,

(09:48):
you think of any the worst possible human atrocities occurring
right here. Texas saw the highest number by far, with
five hundred and twenty eight. Good morning everyone. Texas saw
the highest number by far, with five hundred and twenty
eight reported incidents. However, however, when you take the state's

(10:08):
high population into account, the rate per capita is much
lower than other states. Oh well, good good, with around
one point seven to six human trafficking incidents reported per
one hundred thousand people. Oh well, okay, since it's only
one point seven six, only one in three quarters. How

(10:30):
many how many times do we hear the ignoramuses among
us talking about how horrible this country was because we
counted slaves. We counted black people. In fact, I shouldn't
say black people's slaves, we just slaves, because slaves could
have been any nationality, could have been any race. Oh,
we were horrible because in terms of trying to get

(10:53):
the Constitution passed, we decided, well, we ought to do
is account slaves as three fifths of a person so
that we could eventual get the slave states to go
ahead and sign on to the constitution so we could
eventually eliminate slavery. So oh, three fifths, well, it was
only one. It was only one in three quarters persons

(11:15):
per one hundred thousand people, one in three quarters persons
per one hundred thousand reported in Texas, So one in
three forced persons were sold into who knows what kind

(11:35):
of horrible conditions passed around, you know, little boys, little
girls passed around for sex purposes, to be raped, to
be brutalized, sodomized, the most horrible things that you can
possibly imagine. But I know you don't want to think
about it. I know you don't want to think that
it possibly occurs. But when you have millions of people

(12:01):
coming into this country illegally, when you have gangs operating
freely throughout this country, when the cartels are essentially controlling
many parts of this country, I seriously doubt that the
figure of five hundred and twenty eight reported incidents is
anywhere near the number of true incidents. In California, which

(12:31):
had the third highest overall number at two hundred and
ninety three human trafficking reports, this amounted to around oh,
only zero point seventy five incidents per one hundred thousand
people in the state, or the number twenty eight highest well,
of course, because California has such a huge population. Now
think about the number of illegal aliens, or think about

(12:54):
the number of cartels the individuals, or the number of
gangs operating in California. Alaska, which doesn't have the heighth
of a population, had the highest rate of human trafficking
incidents per capita, at nine point ninety five per one
hundred thousand. There were seventy three reported incidents in twenty

(13:17):
twenty three. You ever been to Anchorage. I've been to Anchorage.
You ever been to Alaska? I've been to Alaska. I
don't know that Alaska is the least sparsely populated state
based on geography or not. It may or may not be.
I don't know. Maybe it's Montana. But still seventy three

(13:40):
reported incidents of human trafficking in Alaska. And congratulations Colorado.
Every time you hear a story about you know, whether
it's Mike Kaufman or Mike Johnston, or it's Jared Polis,

(14:02):
or it's any Democrat. Yeah, I know that Mike Coffin's Republican.
You hear any Democrat in this state talking about, well,
you know, we need to welcome these people with open arms,
or that. You know, trenda rog was not that severe
of a problem. You know, they took control of one
apartment building, but you know that's all. Oh, until we

(14:24):
learned about the second apartment building, and then we learned
about the third apartment building. How soon before we learned
about the fourth apartment building. Colorado had the tenth highest
overall number of human trafficking incidents nationwide in twenty twenty three,
at eighty four. That's one in almost one one and
a half incidents per capita one and a half people

(14:47):
per capita, the tenth highest in the nation. Now, so
Dragon hand me this. I think Dragon expected me to
get upset as upset about this story is as I do. Well.

Speaker 3 (14:59):
I hope you get upset about every story I hand you. Well,
I pretty dude.

Speaker 2 (15:03):
I mean, for example, the one story that I haven't
gotten to yet is a trendy sex move to intensify
orgasms could ruin your romps forever, according to doctors. I
haven't gotten to that one yet. But you think I
just throw these away? Oh no, I hold on to them.

Speaker 3 (15:18):
Do you see the rats one?

Speaker 2 (15:20):
Huh?

Speaker 3 (15:20):
You didn't look at the rats one? The sexy rats.

Speaker 2 (15:25):
Taxidermist turned rats into sexy show girls, you go with
nipple covers and fake eyelashes. No, I haven't gotten to
that one yet. So I look at this story and
there's a chart, just a list of the states by
rank and the total number of incidents reported. And of

(15:49):
course it's because it doesn't print. Well, I'm not sure
which state. Oh yeah, Texas, five hundred and twenty eight.
So there are five hundred twenty eight individuals at a
minimum in Texas and when I say individuals, I know

(16:13):
we tend to think adults. We tend to think about,
you know, a twenty something or thirty something or maybe
even a grandmother that's sold into slavery somewhere to you know,
take care of some cartel member or gang member's house,
you know, cook forum or whatever. I mean. Think about this,
five hundred and twenty eight individuals in state of Texas
that are known, that are known. Those are five hundred

(16:37):
and twenty eight human beings that are being sexually and
physically abused because we allow unfettered immigration into this country,
and not only just unfedered immigration, but we tend to
turn our heads to the side because we don't really

(16:58):
want to look. We don't really want to look at
the crime. And when it comes to crime, the next
story proves that Colorado is no better than California, is
no better than Illinois, it's no better than New York,
is no better than any other craphole state in the

(17:18):
entire country. But let's look at some of these numbers.
Texas five hundred and twenty eight, Georgia three hundred and two,
California two hundred and ninety three, Nevada one hundred and
sixty eight, Wisconsin one hundred and twelve. Minnesota. Hey, Tim Walls,
he had one hundred and six reported incidents of human
trafficking in your state. Too bad that the two women

(17:42):
that are so full of themselves, nor Odonna and Margaret Brennan,
didn't have cajonies, because well, maybe they do, maybe they don't.
You can't tell these days, to ask you about how's
the human traffic in your state, Governor Walls, Arizona one
hundred and four, Tennessee ninety one, eighty nine, and Colorado
eighty four. So if you're driving around Colorado, look closely

(18:07):
at the underbelly of this state. Not always visible, not
clearly visible at all. The eighty four individuals that we
know of human trafficked in the state. Good morning, Michael
and Dragon.

Speaker 4 (18:21):
It's one of those days. You know, you go to
work and it's dark out. I'm used to at being light,
but for that time of year where it's dark. Since
you guys are professionals, are going to work at oh
dark thirty, I'm wondering if you can give us an
advice on how to lighten up our mood since it's
a dark day.

Speaker 2 (18:41):
Thank you very much by I thought I was lightning
everybody's mood up by talking about human trafficking. Yeah, come on,
I commem in here. I do the best I can.
I have a limited amount of things I can work with.
I could come in here and just you know what, dragon,
could we just turn into well, because we could turn

(19:02):
into the third floor and just do Penis jokes on.
That sounds great, doesn't it. I mean, it does sound
kind of good, doesn't it? Just find anything? Uh? Well,
we we do have a mother who transforms frozen rats
into sexy show girls with colored feathers. Handmade nipple covers.

(19:28):
You know, I don't know that I've ever used the
phrase handmade dimple nipple covers, not just on air, but
anywhere in my entire life. Have I used that phrase?
What is a handmade nipple cover?

Speaker 3 (19:43):
I would assume like pasties?

Speaker 2 (19:45):
What I thought, just pasties? Because but once again, do
we have to complicate the language instead of just saying pasties,
we got to talk about handmade nipple covers and fake eyelashes.
Her novelty Adermy business regularly requires twelve hour days to

(20:05):
keep up with demand. Wait what twelve hour days to
keep up with demand? For this specialty.

Speaker 3 (20:15):
Texadermy you know what, in this economy, I'm just glad
she's got a job. And apparently there's a clientele to
do it. Listen, they're busy enough to It proves.

Speaker 2 (20:24):
You if you if you just let your mind, you know,
maybe this is why you know. Yesterday I talked about
on the Michael Brown minute across the hall about I
think I talked about it here too, how marijuana sales
were down, and somebody sent me a text message and said,
maybe because psilocybin uh or whatever it is, the mushrooms.

(20:45):
Maybe because all this other stuff is legal now people
are moving on to other drugs, moving on to other
you know, psychedelics. Well here, maybe people are tired of
you know, you can't, you can't like did you hear
the story about the guy that killed the mountain lion
with a shovel? So somewhere here in Colorado, I'm pretty

(21:06):
sure it was in Colorado that there was a guy
who was camping or hiking with his dog. I think
he must have been camping, so they must have had
a camping shovel with him, and mountain lion attacks him
and the dog. So he takes a shovel and kills
the mountain lion. Now the side of the part is
in Colorado, he'll probably be arrested for killing the mountain

(21:28):
lion because you know, we want to we want to,
you know, stop mountain lion hunting in Colorad. I think
that's on the ballot to stop the hunting of mountain
lions so that we can be like California, the mountain
lions just you know, you know, instead of Haitians eating
the cats and dogs, will have the mountain lions eating
eating the cats and dogs. There's your joke of the
day right there. The rodents rats are dressed and posed

(21:53):
as glam performers. And it all began during a craft
night four years ago. Caitlin's say, we watched videos online.
Here's your problem right there. You know, you go to
the interwebs, you start, you know, going down the rabbit
hole or the rat hole of YouTube, and the next
thing you know you're doing. You're doing taxidermy, taking dead

(22:14):
rats and putting eyelashes and handmade nipple covers on them.
Since then, she has been blown away by her business's popularity,
selling the preserved rats online and at audities and curiosities
expose around this country. She said. When people come up
to me, they gasp or they clutch their pearls when

(22:37):
they see what I've made, and they get really excited.
I love it so much.

Speaker 3 (22:46):
Don't worry. If you're even slightly curious, you can go
to Michael says, go here dot com and you can
find that story with pictures.

Speaker 2 (22:53):
You can see the little rats with their little nipples
covered up with handmade nipple titles. Christmas. Okay, So there's
how you lighten up your morning. Well, the sun's coming up.
See God's giving us another day. Well, at least so far.
It's early to give it time. That's right. Every day

(23:14):
I think, I think to myself when I when I
wake up and I drive into the studio and it's dark,
I think, oh God, are you going to have you
had it? Have you had enough? Because because I certainly have.

Speaker 3 (23:27):
From Goober ninety six, Michael, please stop saying nipple covers
or pasties. No one ever needs to hear you say
those words. Ever.

Speaker 2 (23:38):
I just bring you stories. Do you think I woke
up this morning thinking to my Do you honestly think
that I woke up this morning driving in if I
told you what I was really taught thinking about driving
in you would you would understand where my headset is.

(23:59):
So do you really think I woke up this morning?
You know, I'm feeding the Lienburgers and you know, and
I'm stepping out on the on the back deck, and
it's a you know, a cool, crisp morning, and I'm thinking,
you know, I think I'll go into the studio this
morning and I'll talk to the goobers about handmade nipple
covers for rats. For rats, yeah, for rats, not even

(24:21):
for like you know, some you know, blonde beauty out there,
but no for a rat for a in why blonde beauty?
Why not a redhead of beauty? Why not a brunette?

Speaker 3 (24:31):
Blondes have more fun.

Speaker 2 (24:32):
Yeah, but why not a black haired beauty? You know?
So instead we have to talk about human trafficking, and
that brings me in such a sour mood. Then now
I got to talk about handmade nipple covers. But now
I want to get back to the story I intended
to talk about before I was so rudely interrupted by
a text message and by my producer.

Speaker 3 (24:52):
Isn't that what you said at the beginning of the
show too, If you don't like what we're talking about.

Speaker 2 (24:55):
Stick around, Try to stick around so we know God,
I always had to stop saying the words. So every
time I do it, I say stop it in my mind,
and then I keep doing it. So we've heard the
stories all across the country about and it's true here.

(25:19):
I think I may have told you that. It's been
a month or so ago. I needed some razor blades
and I was close to a Walmart. I walked into
a Walmart. You can't just get razor blades off the shelf.
You have to wait for somebody to come. And now
they're not behind glass, at least the Walmart I was in.

(25:44):
But you have to you have to first. I asked somebody.
There was there was a there was a kid stalking items,
and I asked him, can you open these for me?
And it was instantaneously obvious to me he spoke no
English whatsoever. And I thought to myself, in my war

(26:05):
is a mine tjan Nope, I'm in Loan Tree. I'm
in Lone Tree, Colorado, and nobody spoke English. But oh,
I guess that's racist to say that, Isn't it? Bite
my ass? Well? Anyway, so I had to wait for I.
So then he had I'm now pointing and he asked,

(26:28):
he walks away, I'm assuming to get someone. That was
a huge That was a stupid assumption on my part.
So then I had to go find someone to unlock them.
And what was interesting is the razor blades I wanted
were locked up, but the Harry's razors, which I've tried
and I think suck, were unlocked. So some razors are

(26:52):
more equal than others. Natural Grocers. You ever been in
natural grocers, they always have those really cheap, stupid commercials
on television. You know, they got like wonder Woman some
you know, it pretends to be wonder Woman, and they,
you know, they sell all the organic stuff. You know,

(27:12):
it's you know, it's like maybe I don't I don't
know whether it's a national chain or not. I just
don't care. Natural Grocers announced, uh yesterday that it plans
to close one of its stores at the corner of
Colfax in Washington. Now, for those of you in Colorado Picture,
if you're familiar with Denver Picture, Colfax in Washington. Now,

(27:38):
I'm not quite sure how far it is from the
tattered cover, but as I recall, Colefax in Washington is
a little sketchy. How sketchy is it? Natural Grocers plans
to close this store because the retail theft and safety
issues impacting the store's performance. Kemp, co, President of Natural Grocers,

(28:02):
said this, We have been actively working to address the
theft and safety issues impacting our store Colfax in Washington
for some time now. Despite our investment spending, Despite our
spending on security and loss prevention strategies over the years,

(28:23):
these factors have continued to challenge our ability to operate
our store safely and sustainably, and we have made the
difficult decision to close our doors at this location. The
store is set to begin a closing sale on Friday
with discounts of ten percent off everything. Ten percent. I mean,
if you're trying to liquidate your inventory, I think ten

(28:44):
percent is not you.

Speaker 3 (28:46):
Probably would have go little higher than Yeah, I think you.

Speaker 2 (28:48):
Want to go a little higher. Let me put it
this way, Dragon and I, I mean, I can't speak
for Dragon, but Missus Redbeard and I and Missus Brown
and I are not going to drive over the Colfax
in Washington to save ten percent on some organic lotion
of some sort.

Speaker 3 (29:05):
At twelve percent or I'm not getting off my couch.

Speaker 2 (29:08):
Yeah, now thirteen percent, fourteen percent? Baby, I'm I'm driving
like a maniac to get over there. Oh good, agree?
Now what was I really going to talk about when
I came in this morning? I'm gonna take a break
and uh do do do? Do? I want to go
back to Tien That's what I wanted to do. I'm

(29:29):
gonna go back to tim Walls for just a moment. Oh, Brownie,
I woke up early this morning. I can't believe you
do this every day. Yeah, but I go to bed
early every night too. Yes's not as fun as it sounds,
right you You you really have to It's a life.
It's a lifestyle change for.

Speaker 3 (29:50):
Certain seven thirty hits and you start yawning and you're like, oh, no.

Speaker 2 (29:56):
Time for bed, you know what? But Dragon, I actually
find that I like it, and I was My dad
was one of those early you know, military guy all
of that. He was always up at you know, five am.

Speaker 3 (30:09):
It's a great excuse not to go out and hang
out with people.

Speaker 2 (30:12):
It really is, isn't it.

Speaker 3 (30:14):
Oh we're gonna go to dinner? What time? Seven? No?

Speaker 2 (30:17):
No, four o'clock? Yeah, I'll go to dinner at four, absolutely.
And the great thing about going to dinner at four
o'clock is, depending on where you go, you get the
early bird. Specially, ain't nobody there, that's right, and there's
nobody there exactly. I've been thinking a lot about that
stupid vice presidential debate. Actually wasn't stupid. I think it's

(30:37):
pretty good. But one thing that I haven't talked too
much about was Tim Walls. Obviously visibly nervous Tim Walls
when he admitted to lying at a congressional hearing about
being in Hong Kong during the Tieneman Square massacre. Do
you realize that that came from when they said that

(31:00):
Minnesota Public Radio had questioned the veracity of his statement,
it was because of something he had said in a
congressional hearing, not just something he had said, you know,
off the cuff at some fundraiser or you know, some
speech to the Kuanas Club. No, it was in a
congressional hearing. Now, not that he hasn't been to China again.

(31:24):
Presumably according to friendly Minnesota Public Radio, this compulsive liar
is so proud of his trips to China that he
claims to have visited twice as often as he actually
was there, but Walt's really has been there frequently enough
to raise a red flag from Fox News. Wall said
former President Donald Trump would have benefited from participating in

(31:46):
one of his trips, arguing Trump would never have befriended
Chinese President Gugene Ping. Now apparently tampon Tim is on
great terms with the dictator. Else Oversight Committee Chairman James
Comber wrote in a Monday letter to Secretary of Majorcus
that his committee quote has recently received whistleblower disclosures regarding

(32:11):
a long standing connection between the Chinese Communist Party and
Minnesota Governor Tim Wallas. Comber had subpoena the Biden Harris
Department of Homeland Security in response to allegations the Democratic
vice presidential nominee had ties to the CCP, Now admitting
that he's not only a liar but also a knucklehead.

(32:33):
That was, you know, just one of many gaffes, including
you know, I became friends with school shooters, which I
clearly you know, we all know that was a gaff,
but still nonetheless it was a gaff. But he said
something interesting that he would that he learned a lot
in those visits. Well, then, why didn't somebody ask him

(32:57):
what did you learn? Kind of like, what did you
know and when did you know it? Kim Walls, good grief, Okay,
let me get back this talk about Hurricane Selene. I'm
starting to get pissed.
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2. Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang

Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.

3. The Joe Rogan Experience

3. The Joe Rogan Experience

The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.

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