December 10, 2025 • 11 mins
Man wrecks a stolen car; tells police he was teleported into the car, and they saved him from the aliens.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
One O seven nine KBP.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
I and your show, time for stupid stories. Start, y'all
all start. Yeah, you are stupid stories brought to you.
Speaker 1 (00:11):
By Bill Murray the band or the musical act dude,
not the Ghostbuster, but Bill Murray's coming to town April seventeenth,
twenty twenty six.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
The filmore gotta be a hell of a show.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Yep tickets. Go on and say, all this Friday.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Did you know the Starbucks Starbucks workers were on strike.
There's an article here says they're still on strike. I
didn't know they're I don't go to Starbucks, I guess,
but right, but not all Starbucks are union nice, So
I don't know. If you don't want to cross the
piggy line, just go Starbucks cross Street, right, Just there
you go.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Time magazine is name. I thought this was weird. Leonardo
DiCaprio is twenty twenty five Entertainer of the Year.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Entertainer.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
Huh yeah, I'm like, y'all forget the Titanic came out
like ninety seven or something like, damn.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Whatever.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
Leonardo DiCaprio likes to avoid publicity as much as possible.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
I know why that is, Well, that's.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
So as well, so his girlfriends don't get cast skipping school.
Taylor Swift the news. I guess her bacherette party is
coming together. Scoop something I'm sure you'll you'll be involved
in somehow.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
I'm hired for.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's a it's a party bus full
of cats.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Scooping has to hurt him and I'm highly allergic. Hilarious.
Watch this dude swell up.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Here's the deal. We're gonna watch him swell up. We're
gonna guess what his weight is after twenty four hours.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
A woman in Florida who was initially arrested for a
d uy, well, she found herself in worse trouble after
that because she apparently was trying to hide a bunch
of this sounds weird, a bunch of anti anxiety medication
in her. Gim tell you like getting her.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
And not to be outdone.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
A schizophrenic woman was hospitalized because she freaked out thinking
that somebody was attempting to communicate with her through a refrigerator,
and she turned herself in. But here's the problem. She'd
she bought a smart fridge and she'd hooked it up,
and the person that was trying to communicate with her
(02:28):
was advertisements that were showing on her led screen on
the refrigerator that she paid to have the service set
up for.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
So there's oh.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
She said, she just wanted this refrigerator, not knowing that
refrigerator would talk to her, so she freaked out on it,
checked herself in new clinic.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Why do you keep telling me to buy oat milk?
Speaker 2 (02:53):
I'm so scared just trying to communicate with me. Can
you imagine something you freaking out of that?
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Just don't get the old people the smart refrigerators. Actually,
nobody should get smart refrigerator.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
It's the dumbest thing ever. You don't need a smart refrigerator, Like,
why do you need your refrigerator to be online or
to talk to you or to play advertising or to
you know, I see that you're low on this. Would
you like we don't order that for you. No, shut up, fridge,
stay out of my business. Just be cold, right, I
(03:25):
guess edible chocolate chip cookies sewed under the Doey brand
name have been recalled up the FDA flag the bunch
for Samonella whoopsy oops all right, gotta be the weirdest
video of the year, says so with the title.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
I guess. In China, we mentioned this yesterday.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
A hoverboard riding bear attacked a zoo keeper. Now we
mentioned that briefly yesterday, but what we didn't see was
they try to use a backboard from a basketball hoop
to try to try to separate the bear.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
And the zoo keeper.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
Oh interesting choice of Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:07):
Well, somebody was on the other side of the basketball
hoop like a right shield. Yeah yeah, while somebody was
nearby with a parrot that was freaking out over the
commotion of the bear and the zoo keeper fighting and
the backboard trying to get between them.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
So the parents on the dudes shoulders just freaking.
Speaker 3 (04:27):
Out about what he's watched to go down with the
bear and the human and the backboard. Weird, It's gotta be.
It's a weird video, man. Yeah, I definitely encourage you
to watch it. Let's see in New York. New York
City is only the third best city to celebrate New
Year's Eve. The two that ranked higher Orlando and Vegas.
We were thinking about going to Orlando, going to Florida
(04:48):
because Puerto Rico is too expensive, right right. I did
a last meeting of search yesterday for takeings to Puerto
Rico because we got hooked up on an Airbnb and
when I put in all the phone, seventy seven hundred
bucks just for the.
Speaker 2 (05:02):
Flight really, and I'm like, I can't out of your mind.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
I believe Puerto Rico is one of those places that
has a big New Year's thing too. That might be
why prices never came down. Now, I don't think so,
because last year that was one that they focused on.
It was Bad Bunnies big New Year's experience.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
I'm sure yeah, with Bad Bunny there because he's Puerto Rican.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
But so if they do, if that's like his annual thing,
maybe that's why Puerto Rico prices or so.
Speaker 3 (05:30):
He's friends with the dude of Airbnb not mentioned it.
So he stated that that that dude's one of his Airbnbs.
When he did that video that gas station that he
did that video app it's like a block away.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
From this's Airbnb. It's crazy. All right, Let's see what else, dude.
This is kind of weird.
Speaker 3 (05:51):
Americans just don't know how to set up their new devices.
There could have been one point four billion hours setting
up new devices over the holiday season. That averages out
to be eight and a half hours per adult in
the United States. That's crazy.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
Fifty five percent of millennials are open to long distance
relationships that never go offline.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Oh, just having an internet girlfriend basically.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
Yeah, that seems very unfulfilling. I mean that is just weird, man, Like, really,
that's that you're good with that?
Speaker 2 (06:30):
You millennials? Man, is strange.
Speaker 3 (06:32):
I'm just telling you, Uh, private transportation things, there could
be workout areas at airports.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
Look, I did see Sean Duffy recommending the people do
pull ups while they're waiting for their plane.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
Like, you don't need to go break down and do
a full on gym workout before you go get come along,
that's too.
Speaker 1 (06:54):
Much something I did see a DIA. Now, if I
flew a lot more, I might try. But they've got
the indoor golf simulator there, which sounds perfect for a layover.
Speaker 3 (07:02):
Now you know what places to stretch out, honest to God,
may not be a bad thing.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Put a full on gym, free wags.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
You know you don't need all that, man, But you
know what can cramped up on a plane sitting in
the uncomfortable seas. I could see where you could actually
utilize a place because you know, people get stiff. Man.
You see it in the airport. I see it because
I fly every one month and a half or so,
and you see people that are a little up in age,
and when they get out the plane, man, it's it's
(07:31):
a rough go, you know, or they sit for a
long time.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
I see it all.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
Time, especially if you can't recline.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
Yeah, yeah, I mean so a place where you could
actually maybe stretch out and loosen up.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Some tendons totally see that, but full of work.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Out to GM man and they're getting yo. Man, God
give me a spot it could calm down. Sixty four
year old man, New Jersey. He's known for playing Santa
Claus over the last several years. Dude, he just got
to rest it on charges related to child pornography in
a dangerous.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
Come on, san.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
All right, here's something kind of funny. A couple went
skating the other day. It took a picture of what
they found in the ice. Now, the headline says it
was a it was a used condom that was found
frozen and ice. Now it's not clear if it was
really used, right, you can't you know, or somebody probably
(08:26):
just put it there as a prank, to be honest,
because that's what pranksters do.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
But that's funny, right, you know.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Uh it was unwrapped and uh, you know, suspended out
there in ice. Organizers of the event said, quote, the
issue was dealt.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
With promptly, got out there with the hair dryer and yes, yes.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
It's like I did the frog the other day. In
my eyes.
Speaker 3 (08:48):
In case you missed it, I say the I don't
know how it happened, but Monday evening there was a
frog and have it's leg was frozen on the top
layer of ice in my pond. And he was a
little bit he was a little bit out there far
enough where I didn't want to go out and stand
on the ice. So anyway, I hacked it out with
his shovel and say, he's still in my living room.
All right, this is a hell of a story. This
(09:09):
dude crashed the stolen BMW yesterday. A Florida man denied
swiping the wheels, explaining to the cops that he was
actually teleported into the vehicle.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
The investigators say that Calvin Johnson took the twenty eighteen
convertible BMW as the car's owner was walking his dog
in Orman Beach, a Centennial park. I guess he he
runners through the unlike BMW and found the key in
the cup holder. Well, he took the vehicle. Johnson drove
(09:47):
over one hundred miles an hour crashed the car in
a single vehicle accident. Apparently passing motorists extracted them from
the total BMW. When cops arrived at the crash scene,
Johnson told him.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
That he was teleported.
Speaker 3 (10:11):
And made a passing reference to the X men and
told officers.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
You saved me from the aliens.
Speaker 3 (10:17):
Man.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Oh, he told the officers they saved them from the aliens. Man.
I was teleporter here and y'all saved me from the aliens. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
He was transported to a local hospital where he's placed underguard,
and he'll be transferred to the county jail upon his
release from the hospital. That's a pretty good excuse. H Yep, dude,
y'all save me. Y'all need to get a medal.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
In the Men in Black universe, this is where Jay
and K show up at the hospital.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
That asked some questions, right right, Tell him to look at
the light, all right.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
Twenty four year old man in Oklahoma named Dylan Redfern
has been nabbed at the robb at a liquor store
on Friday with a musket and it was a musket pistol.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
It was like one of those shorties, right, uh huh.
Speaker 3 (11:03):
Please say these single shot percussion Derringer was from the
mid eighteen hundreds.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Oh wow.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
He was arrested for first degree robbery and it was
a serious situation because he actually pointed it at people.
It says, thankfully nobody was hurt. But the damn gun
didn't even have a flint and it couldn't go off.
It just there was no empty gun. It's unclear how
he got it, but says he was wearing a red
hoodie and pajama pants at the time, so he wasn't teleported.
One O seven nine KBP.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
I and your show, time for stupid stories. Start, y'all
all start. Yeah, you are stupid stories brought to you.
Speaker 1 (00:11):
By Bill Murray the band or the musical act dude,
not the Ghostbuster, but Bill Murray's coming to town April seventeenth,
twenty twenty six.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
The filmore gotta be a hell of a show.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Yep tickets. Go on and say, all this Friday.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Did you know the Starbucks Starbucks workers were on strike.
There's an article here says they're still on strike. I
didn't know they're I don't go to Starbucks, I guess,
but right, but not all Starbucks are union nice, So
I don't know. If you don't want to cross the
piggy line, just go Starbucks cross Street, right, Just there
you go.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Time magazine is name. I thought this was weird. Leonardo
DiCaprio is twenty twenty five Entertainer of the Year.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Entertainer.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
Huh yeah, I'm like, y'all forget the Titanic came out
like ninety seven or something like, damn.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Whatever.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
Leonardo DiCaprio likes to avoid publicity as much as possible.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
I know why that is, Well, that's.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
So as well, so his girlfriends don't get cast skipping school.
Taylor Swift the news. I guess her bacherette party is
coming together. Scoop something I'm sure you'll you'll be involved
in somehow.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
I'm hired for.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's a it's a party bus full
of cats.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Scooping has to hurt him and I'm highly allergic. Hilarious.
Watch this dude swell up.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Here's the deal. We're gonna watch him swell up. We're
gonna guess what his weight is after twenty four hours.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
A woman in Florida who was initially arrested for a
d uy, well, she found herself in worse trouble after
that because she apparently was trying to hide a bunch
of this sounds weird, a bunch of anti anxiety medication
in her. Gim tell you like getting her.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
And not to be outdone.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
A schizophrenic woman was hospitalized because she freaked out thinking
that somebody was attempting to communicate with her through a refrigerator,
and she turned herself in. But here's the problem. She'd
she bought a smart fridge and she'd hooked it up,
and the person that was trying to communicate with her
(02:28):
was advertisements that were showing on her led screen on
the refrigerator that she paid to have the service set
up for.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
So there's oh.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
She said, she just wanted this refrigerator, not knowing that
refrigerator would talk to her, so she freaked out on it,
checked herself in new clinic.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Why do you keep telling me to buy oat milk?
Speaker 2 (02:53):
I'm so scared just trying to communicate with me. Can
you imagine something you freaking out of that?
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Just don't get the old people the smart refrigerators. Actually,
nobody should get smart refrigerator.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
It's the dumbest thing ever. You don't need a smart refrigerator, Like,
why do you need your refrigerator to be online or
to talk to you or to play advertising or to
you know, I see that you're low on this. Would
you like we don't order that for you. No, shut up, fridge,
stay out of my business. Just be cold, right, I
(03:25):
guess edible chocolate chip cookies sewed under the Doey brand
name have been recalled up the FDA flag the bunch
for Samonella whoopsy oops all right, gotta be the weirdest
video of the year, says so with the title.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
I guess. In China, we mentioned this yesterday.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
A hoverboard riding bear attacked a zoo keeper. Now we
mentioned that briefly yesterday, but what we didn't see was
they try to use a backboard from a basketball hoop
to try to try to separate the bear.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
And the zoo keeper.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
Oh interesting choice of Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:07):
Well, somebody was on the other side of the basketball
hoop like a right shield. Yeah yeah, while somebody was
nearby with a parrot that was freaking out over the
commotion of the bear and the zoo keeper fighting and
the backboard trying to get between them.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
So the parents on the dudes shoulders just freaking.
Speaker 3 (04:27):
Out about what he's watched to go down with the
bear and the human and the backboard. Weird, It's gotta be.
It's a weird video, man. Yeah, I definitely encourage you
to watch it. Let's see in New York. New York
City is only the third best city to celebrate New
Year's Eve. The two that ranked higher Orlando and Vegas.
We were thinking about going to Orlando, going to Florida
(04:48):
because Puerto Rico is too expensive, right right. I did
a last meeting of search yesterday for takeings to Puerto
Rico because we got hooked up on an Airbnb and
when I put in all the phone, seventy seven hundred
bucks just for the.
Speaker 2 (05:02):
Flight really, and I'm like, I can't out of your mind.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
I believe Puerto Rico is one of those places that
has a big New Year's thing too. That might be
why prices never came down. Now, I don't think so,
because last year that was one that they focused on.
It was Bad Bunnies big New Year's experience.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
I'm sure yeah, with Bad Bunny there because he's Puerto Rican.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
But so if they do, if that's like his annual thing,
maybe that's why Puerto Rico prices or so.
Speaker 3 (05:30):
He's friends with the dude of Airbnb not mentioned it.
So he stated that that that dude's one of his Airbnbs.
When he did that video that gas station that he
did that video app it's like a block away.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
From this's Airbnb. It's crazy. All right, Let's see what else, dude.
This is kind of weird.
Speaker 3 (05:51):
Americans just don't know how to set up their new devices.
There could have been one point four billion hours setting
up new devices over the holiday season. That averages out
to be eight and a half hours per adult in
the United States. That's crazy.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
Fifty five percent of millennials are open to long distance
relationships that never go offline.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Oh, just having an internet girlfriend basically.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
Yeah, that seems very unfulfilling. I mean that is just weird, man, Like, really,
that's that you're good with that?
Speaker 2 (06:30):
You millennials? Man, is strange.
Speaker 3 (06:32):
I'm just telling you, Uh, private transportation things, there could
be workout areas at airports.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
Look, I did see Sean Duffy recommending the people do
pull ups while they're waiting for their plane.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
Like, you don't need to go break down and do
a full on gym workout before you go get come along,
that's too.
Speaker 1 (06:54):
Much something I did see a DIA. Now, if I
flew a lot more, I might try. But they've got
the indoor golf simulator there, which sounds perfect for a layover.
Speaker 3 (07:02):
Now you know what places to stretch out, honest to God,
may not be a bad thing.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Put a full on gym, free wags.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
You know you don't need all that, man, But you
know what can cramped up on a plane sitting in
the uncomfortable seas. I could see where you could actually
utilize a place because you know, people get stiff. Man.
You see it in the airport. I see it because
I fly every one month and a half or so,
and you see people that are a little up in age,
and when they get out the plane, man, it's it's
(07:31):
a rough go, you know, or they sit for a
long time.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
I see it all.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
Time, especially if you can't recline.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
Yeah, yeah, I mean so a place where you could
actually maybe stretch out and loosen up.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Some tendons totally see that, but full of work.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Out to GM man and they're getting yo. Man, God
give me a spot it could calm down. Sixty four
year old man, New Jersey. He's known for playing Santa
Claus over the last several years. Dude, he just got
to rest it on charges related to child pornography in
a dangerous.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
Come on, san.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
All right, here's something kind of funny. A couple went
skating the other day. It took a picture of what
they found in the ice. Now, the headline says it
was a it was a used condom that was found
frozen and ice. Now it's not clear if it was
really used, right, you can't you know, or somebody probably
(08:26):
just put it there as a prank, to be honest,
because that's what pranksters do.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
But that's funny, right, you know.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Uh it was unwrapped and uh, you know, suspended out
there in ice. Organizers of the event said, quote, the
issue was dealt.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
With promptly, got out there with the hair dryer and yes, yes.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
It's like I did the frog the other day. In
my eyes.
Speaker 3 (08:48):
In case you missed it, I say the I don't
know how it happened, but Monday evening there was a
frog and have it's leg was frozen on the top
layer of ice in my pond. And he was a
little bit he was a little bit out there far
enough where I didn't want to go out and stand
on the ice. So anyway, I hacked it out with
his shovel and say, he's still in my living room.
All right, this is a hell of a story. This
(09:09):
dude crashed the stolen BMW yesterday. A Florida man denied
swiping the wheels, explaining to the cops that he was
actually teleported into the vehicle.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
The investigators say that Calvin Johnson took the twenty eighteen
convertible BMW as the car's owner was walking his dog
in Orman Beach, a Centennial park. I guess he he
runners through the unlike BMW and found the key in
the cup holder. Well, he took the vehicle. Johnson drove
(09:47):
over one hundred miles an hour crashed the car in
a single vehicle accident. Apparently passing motorists extracted them from
the total BMW. When cops arrived at the crash scene,
Johnson told him.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
That he was teleported.
Speaker 3 (10:11):
And made a passing reference to the X men and
told officers.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
You saved me from the aliens.
Speaker 3 (10:17):
Man.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Oh, he told the officers they saved them from the aliens. Man.
I was teleporter here and y'all saved me from the aliens. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
He was transported to a local hospital where he's placed underguard,
and he'll be transferred to the county jail upon his
release from the hospital. That's a pretty good excuse. H Yep, dude,
y'all save me. Y'all need to get a medal.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
In the Men in Black universe, this is where Jay
and K show up at the hospital.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
That asked some questions, right right, Tell him to look at
the light, all right.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
Twenty four year old man in Oklahoma named Dylan Redfern
has been nabbed at the robb at a liquor store
on Friday with a musket and it was a musket pistol.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
It was like one of those shorties, right, uh huh.
Speaker 3 (11:03):
Please say these single shot percussion Derringer was from the
mid eighteen hundreds.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Oh wow.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
He was arrested for first degree robbery and it was
a serious situation because he actually pointed it at people.
It says, thankfully nobody was hurt. But the damn gun
didn't even have a flint and it couldn't go off.
It just there was no empty gun. It's unclear how
he got it, but says he was wearing a red
hoodie and pajama pants at the time, so he wasn't teleported.
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