Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
There's a new term buzzing on the Internet, Dick.
Dual income? No, kid, you probably have an
opinion on these people or an opinion on people who have an
opinion on these people. America's birth rate has hit its
lowest point in more than a century.
Some are blaming it on infertility.
Others say the state of the world is causing couples to
think twice about having children.
(00:21):
Childless marriages could be a good thing if they were a result
of God's sovereign providential work.
Oh my God, can't even hear you. They like avocado toast and
brunches out and going to plays and having sweet vacations.
You're probably super selfish. Kids are better than brunch.
And then there's another group of young couples that want the
(00:43):
lifestyle of childless households and the lifestyle it
brings with it. Welcome to The DINK Side, the
podcast about life, laughs and living child free.
We're a double income, no kids couple navigating the UPS sounds
and hilarious inbetweens of choosing a different path in a
world that won't stop asking. So when are you having kids?
(01:05):
When are you going to do it? And we're not the only ones that
are asked that question. As you find out today, people on
television are often asked that question as well.
But I wanted to start today, babe, by just posing a simple
question or a statement. I guess it's very simple.
I don't know how people do it. I don't know how people afford
(01:27):
having children. And the reason I bring this up
right now is because we've had afew recent life experiences that
make me question this exact thing.
Number one, this weekend we wentto shop for eyeglasses.
Yeah, you got a pair of glasses.I'm trying to find a pair of
glasses. I don't know how.
(01:50):
Why are they so goddamn expensive?
I don't know. And we're, we went to Warby
Parker, Jins, JINS both like I think are chains and then
they're all around the $200 range.
And then we went to one other one in silver, like a boutique,
(02:13):
and it was like appointment only.
And then they let us in randomly.
We didn't have an appointment, but we like looked sad at the
door and you were trying some on.
And then you're like, oh, just out of curiosity, like how much
are these 'cause they have no prices on them, which is always
a bad sign. It's.
(02:34):
Yeah, and what did she say? Like 785 or something or.
Nine. That would have been a bargain,
$960. Jesus.
Christ and they were like plastic.
That's the thing that I don't understand about expensive
frames, because people often crap on Warby Parker because
they're cheap plastic. People often crap on zenni.com
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or 1800 contacts, whatever all these online ones are, and I
don't get it because they're made of the same material as the
$960 pair. It's not like you're putting
these on and it's like, oh, these are stainless steel, these
are made of gold, These are diamond crusted.
They're just plastic. Yeah, they're not 14 karat.
(03:18):
I think you're paying for the designer, but again, but they're
also not like Prada. No, they're not.
No, they're just rando. Nobody's going to stop you in
the street and go, oh, those areso and so.
It's the same thing as, like, pillows.
Yeah, where it's like, this is technically fabric and fluff,
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but why is this $80? Right.
It makes no sense and it's very frustrating because I, I've been
trying to find a pair and it's like finding a new, I don't
know, a new persona. It's very difficult because I
also want to go a little bit bold, but I think I am a little
afraid of going bold, but I'm going to do it.
(04:00):
I guess what do you mean by bold?
Because I feel like you've triedon some pretty bold ones and
then you think then you don't like them.
I think that I think it's I, I, I do like them, but I'm just
looking for the right bold pair.Like this is a very similar,
it's a very similar feeling to wanting my first tattoo.
(04:23):
I want to get one, but I feel like I don't, I don't what, what
my ideal scenario is. I get a tattoo that I like and
almost nobody knows that I have one.
Do you know what I mean? Why?
Because it's on your ass or likeyou.
No, no, I just mean like, I don't like the attention that
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comes with it. I don't need, I'm not getting
the tattoo for other people to be like, Oh my God, I love your
Tata. I just want to get the tattoo
because I like it. I like the way it looks on me.
I have. I guess what I'm saying is I've
had too many experiences with eyeglasses in my life where I
get a new pair and it's all people can talk about to my
face. For like a day.
(05:08):
No, for like several weeks. OK, I feel like you're gravely
overestimating the amount of people that will give a shit
when you get a tattoo. Like they're going to maybe
mention it once if they happen to see it on your arm or
something. Yeah, like you've seen every
time I get a tattoo. Like it's like people don't
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care. It's not really even a headline.
Yeah, I guess I don't know. I just, I don't.
I think if you get like 70s gameshow host glasses then maybe
people will talk about it but. That's kind of the ones I want,
you know what I mean? Yeah, but then every time you
try ones on that look like a 70sgame show host, you're like, I
(05:49):
don't like this. No, it's just I don't like those
particular ones. I'm just, I'm looking for that
golden pair, you know, now seeing.
Myself in this window. I feel like these are too big
for my head now. No, not at all.
I literally before we started recording, I told you that I
liked your glasses. I just had to kill a bug, sorry.
(06:12):
That's OK, we will hold for bug.Jesus Christ, you're sick.
So no, we had to get glasses. That was the whole thing.
You got to pay for the exam, yougot to pay for the glasses, you
got to pay for the lenses. You it's expensive as hell.
And then on top of that I I got a car a few months ago and it's
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already kaput. It Yeah, it's a lemon.
It's a lemon. It's a lemon and.
People keep saying to me like, isn't there a lemon law?
Yes there is if you buy a new car.
Not a 2012. No, 2012, it's generous.
It's 2005. Oh shit.
(06:55):
So I fear that ship has sailed, you know.
Yeah, so it's not a lemon, it's just old.
Yeah, I. OK, back to the glasses real
quick. Hot cake, I thought.
I actually thought of this whilewe were in line at the farmers
market. I looked behind us and there was
a little girl with glasses on. She was like 3 and I think I
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like kids in glasses. OK.
Because it's giving 70 year old and a three-year old body.
Yeah, I like that. They I like.
I turned around and I was immediate.
I don't even know this girl. I don't know her personality.
She might suck, but I immediately was more disarmed
because I was like, oh, she's like a little old lady, but
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she's 3. Like it made.
And you know what? I actually think that might
transfer to her personality, even though we still have no
proof and I didn't introduce myself.
I think that having glasses as alittle kid probably bakes into
your personality like no other 3year old.
Like probably 1 out of 103 year olds have glasses or whatever,
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or one out of 200 or whatever the stats are.
Probably pretty high actually. OK, well it probably makes you
have more of a personality because you're not like other 3
year olds. That's true.
I never thought about that so. Then they probably turn out
cooler than other kids and I think I like little kids that
(08:25):
wear glasses but also picture how expensive that is because
their heads are always growing in size and I'm sure their
prescription is changing and whatever blah blah blah.
So then you have to keep buying the glasses.
And also that's not even counting the kid is 3.
So do they break the glasses once a month?
(08:46):
Right. By falling like they fall off of
their head, or they fall on the ground or they scratch them or
whatever. I'm sure you have to pay for the
scratch. Resistant as hell, like
indestructible ones, and then they're too small for their head
in six months. I remember when I got my first
pair and it was a very like, it was a funny time when I was in.
(09:09):
It's probably 4th or 5th grade or something like that.
And it was around that time whenyou start kids start getting
glasses because you start to understand, like, you're not
reading the math up on the whiteboard, you know?
And it was always interesting tosee.
Like, I feel like it changed people's personalities a bit,
you know, because they just like, have a different vibe now.
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So it's a very important decision when you're getting
your first pair of glasses, which one you're going to go
with and everything. But I remember when I was a kid,
like now as an adult, I, if I get a new pair, my old pair has
like maybe a scratch or two on the lens, but they're in pretty
good shape. When I was a kid, my old pair
would be like, there was shit falling off of it.
The lens popped out. We had to put the lens back in.
(09:54):
They're, you know, glued together in some cases.
Like kids wear those things hard.
You're absolutely right. Yeah, I I can't imagine.
It's probably like what, 800 bucks a year for your kid to
have glasses or something? Probably.
And it's like, is it worth it? I I don't know, do they need to
(10:14):
have clear vision? Blurry.
Also, how do you even find out that your kid needs glasses?
Are they like, oh, I can't read?Like, yeah, it's three.
I don't know. No, I think there's a period.
Go to the eye doctor I guess. Yeah, I think you're like
required to, to go. Well, actually I, I, I remember
(10:35):
it now. I was when I was in 3rd or 4th
grade and we had to do like a yearly physical at school as a
part of like the presidential fitness test or whatever.
And the nurse doing that part ofit would take a look at your
eyes. And if you didn't pass a certain
threshold then they'd send a note home to your parents and be
like hey I don't think he can read.
(10:58):
This might be why his grades areso bad.
That was kind of like the scoliosis test where they were
like, oh, bend over. Which in hindsight, it was such
a bullshit to us. They're just like bend over and
we're just going to see. We're just going to look and see
if your spine looks crooked to the eye.
So much of that stuff feels likeI think about this stuff all the
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time. Actually, the nurse I would go
to when I was a kid, like workedin the office at my school.
What, what was her medical degree?
Did she have one? You know what I mean?
Like she wasn't qualified, most likely.
I, I went to a private Lutheran school.
They. She was probably like.
Praying it away in there. Yeah, a volunteer.
(11:43):
And. Was she even getting paid?
Do you remember doing all of those yearly?
The presidential fitness tests and all that.
Yeah. Where did you fare?
Like, were you top of the class?Somewhere in the middle.
I was in the middle. I could hang from the pull up
bar, but I couldn't do a pull up.
I could run a mile. Yeah, I could touch my toes.
(12:06):
But you know, the flexibility one.
Yeah, like I was OK, but not like great.
I think I was. I think I remember being pretty
good but not like top of my class but it got weirdly
competitive. Could you do a pull up?
Yeah I could do a pull up I don't know if I could do AI
(12:27):
think I could do a pull up now really not yeah, just not not a
ton of them but I OK well I'll have to let's find a bar I'll do
I'll see if there's one at the gym tonight and I'll and I'll
report we. Don't still have a pull up bar?
No, I don't think so. We sell it.
We sold in our garage sale, I'm pretty sure.
(12:48):
Which, by the way, we stopped bya friend's garage sale over the
weekend. Exhilarating.
Yeah, exhilarating. We.
It's like you catch the bug all over again.
And I mentioned to you, I think that garage sales still seem
like a very untapped entertainment source.
Yeah. There's got to be like, you
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know, these simulator games. Did I tell you last week that
the most one of the most populargames on Steam right now is a a
video store rental simulator? Essentially the game is you open
a Blockbuster and you run the Blockbuster.
That's cool. I feel like there should be a
game show where they put three fake garage sales and you have
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to go and you can only pick fouritems and whoever's are
technically worth the most combined when like you have to
go rummage through everything and it's kind of like a
scavenger hunt. So it's like Supermarket Sweep
but your cart and your cart has to equal the most.
But it's a garage sale version. I think what you're describing
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is the show Storage Wars. Yeah, it's a good, I mean, it's
a great idea. I love it.
This is why people love storage.Wars.
Got it. OK.
But I was, I was bummed to find out that show was like staged.
(14:17):
They're they like pre pack? Yeah, they like pre pack the
storage units at this point. They do, yeah.
It's not real. No, not fully.
Not fully. Fuck off.
And so the people are cast. Well, the there's the same cast
every episode it's the same. People like the people bidding
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on it. Yeah, it's the same people who
bid on it in every episode. So that when they win the bid,
they don't actually get the stuff because it's fake.
No, they do. So have you ever watched Let's
Start it Worse, it's occurring to me.
Maybe you've never seen the storage?
I've watched it literally with you.
(14:58):
I don't know if you have maybe II think you're thinking of
something. Else I know so bid on a thing
they they open a storage unit, they can't look through it, but
they can look at it. Yeah, it's accurate.
And they bid and whoever wins the bid then gets the unit of
stuff and then. They sell it the same people
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bidding every episode. Fine, but then do they actually
get the stuff in it? I don't think so.
Like all of the all of the people who were involved in that
show allegedly at some point or another owned like a thrift
store or consignment store and they were at these places to get
the stuff to sell at their stores.
Right now, I'm pretty sure they just load them up and do it for
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entertainment value. And I know, I know.
I mean, Gary Vee for a while on YouTube was going to garage
sales and we watched those videos and they're exhilarating.
Ah, I just, it's a, it's an untapped market.
I love a garage sale. We were joking that we wanted to
sell more stuff and like you could just sell your car for
(16:02):
$5.00 an hour. Yeah, I, I probably should I
probably. Should I had a friend in my car?
Well, whatever. An acquaintance, an enemy.
No, I had a friend in my car. And I was saying like, oh, yeah,
(16:23):
clearly it's not a family car. It's a small Fiat.
And my husband drives a Mini, and the Mini just broke down.
And he, I was like, not a familycar.
And he's like, yeah, you couldn't put a kid back there,
at least legally. And then it made me think, can
you not put a kid in the back seat if it's not a 4 door?
(16:45):
Wait. Can you not put a kid at all?
This is a This is incredible information.
This is I can't even. I can't host a child in my car,
period. Yeah, first of all, not invited.
Second of all, can't really. Happen illegal, then I can go oh
oh I I would I would take your kid in my car, but it's illegal.
(17:07):
Sorry. No, I mean according to the
Highway Patrol website it is legal to put a kid in a 2 door
car as long as they are in an age appropriate car seat,
booster seat, or seat belt. So I could technically put a car
seat in the Fiat. Only if you can get the car seat
in there and attach it properly,which is probably not possible
(17:28):
in your car. So success we did it.
Fine, I guess. I guess I'm wrong.
Now, but I, it's a good question.
I mean, you brought that up. I was like, Hank, it's certainly
not convenient. You know, it's not going to be
something that people volunteer to do.
But yeah, I, we, it's, we have two 2 door cars, or at least we
(17:51):
did mine, like I said, bit the dust.
This is probably the record for the, the shortest amount of
time, time I've owned a car. Jesus.
RIP. Yeah, it's only been a couple of
months. How?
Literally like 3. It's been about, it's been about
six weeks. It's been about six or seven
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weeks, I believe. That's it.
Yeah, isn't that awful? That's really sad.
It's really, really bad. But this is another example of
like, I don't know what people do when the minivan breaks down,
you know, right? Cars are not cheap.
They're expensive anyway. You OK?
Did something happen in there? I heard a noise.
(18:37):
Are the dogs revolting? Sure, yeah.
They're like we can fit in the car.
How was your weekend? You did some shows, You were
travelling with some friends. We're considering this
travelling. You said something kept coming
up in the car that you weren't happy about.
Oh, it's just like I was drivinga comic around town.
(19:01):
And by a town I mean out to San Bernardino.
So it was like 2 hours each way or whatever.
And like, he's a dad of two kidsand, you know, actively knows
how much I don't like kids or want kids.
But he just kept like, I'm driving, I'm looking at the road
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and he's putting his phone in front of my face to show me
videos of his kid dancing and then videos of his other kid.
Like, like the at one point he was holding his phone up so I
could listen to his wife and like his kids like shrieking in
my ear and then showing me more videos of his kid dancing.
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And I'm like having to be like aha, like, wow.
I just don't. I'm like, I'm driving like I'm
looking at the road first of all.
So you showing me videos of anything risky, but then showing
me videos of your kid and me feigning interest.
Like I just think it's audacious.
(20:05):
And then also it's like, you know me and you hear my jokes
about not liking kids all the time.
And like, you literally know I have a podcast about not wanting
kids, but you're like, it's justlike, OK.
I didn't ask, they were unsolicited videos.
Yeah. You know what I mean?
I I have a similar experience. I work with a handful of nice
(20:30):
people who were who are very happy about having nieces and
nephews and things and there's absolutely nothing wrong with
that. And they, they like to show
pictures, which again, nothing wrong with that.
Absolutely nothing wrong with that, but it's become.
Unsolicited. Well, I don't.
I don't mind it. I don't mind it as a general
(20:53):
practice. What I find confusing is that it
is a multiple times a day practice.
Oh my God. And I'm like I, I this is, this
is I like it. I by the way, I, I love dogs.
And if somebody showed me the same ish picture of their dog 12
(21:15):
times a day I'd be like OK I understand.
I think it would be weird if I unsolicited showed a video of
our dog to people that weren't didn't ask to see one.
Like little bit I especially andwhile they're driving.
Like I'm in the car with an acquaintance and I'm showing
them videos of my dog doing something while they're driving
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is like weird. And so I think it's like any
video of anything, one, while you're driving and two, I didn't
ask for this. But then also it makes me feel
like people don't know me. I'm like, does this seem like
something I wanted to see like Idon't?
And then I'm in this weird. Position where I have to go.
(21:56):
Cool. How many different reactions are
there to your kids flailing around?
That is why on the opposite end of that stick, I I have stopped.
I have stopped showing people pictures and videos and whether
it's from my personal life or something I saw online that I
think is funny, I've stopped sharing my phone and like, hey,
(22:18):
look at this, check this out because I cannot deal with the
heartbreak anymore. I can't do it.
It's already of somebody go likeme finding a funny video, for
example, and showing it to them and then be like, Oh yes,
humorous. That is heartbreaking.
That is the most vulnerable human experience is check out
(22:39):
this video I think is funny in front of a person.
I think that it's like the same as that game.
What is it called Cards Against Humanity where you there's a
person deciding which card is funnier?
You noted. And I think that showing someone
a funny TikTok video like I pride myself on I there's only
(23:04):
like 4 or five people that I send Tiktok videos to.
Yeah. And I pride myself on knowing
which videos to send, which people of which which videos
which people are going to find funny.
Right, like what they respond to?
Right. Their sense of humor
specifically. And I think that you're not as
(23:29):
good at knowing which audience for which video.
I first of all, what makes you say that?
Hang on a second. I don't.
I was not prepared for this level of intervention.
OK, You really, you really backdoored me there.
(23:50):
It's like the it's like in CardsAgainst Humanity.
Like, I think you need to like, think harder, think harder about
your audience. OK.
And you're just kind of like, I like this, so everyone should
like it. Ouch.
First of all, it's getting worse.
You're like you're the daggers are coming out.
(24:12):
Ouch. Do you think, based on your
experience with people's reactions lately, do you think
I'm wrong? OK, I need to pause you right
there and ask multiple follow upquestions before I even answer
that. Number one, though, you asked
that as if you have had conversations behind the doors
with many people in my. Life.
(24:33):
The Doors. Behind the scenes is that, is
that something that's happened? No.
Have you the hesitation in your voice?
You're killing me on this. You Have you had sidebar
conversations with people that we know about how terrible I am
at sending videos? No.
OK. What makes you think that?
I don't know what somebody's going to respond well to, I'm
(24:56):
guess. I guess you're speaking for
yourself here. Yeah, the videos that you save
and then you're like, look at this.
And I'm like, OK, I am. And I'm the person you should
know the most of what I would respond to.
I think you're thinking of this.If you.
So. I'm saying if you show me duds,
(25:19):
then what are you showing other people?
OK, I don't like this. First of all, First of all,
welcome to the Dinkside Crossfire.
By the way, I, I'm not the, the fact that you think that when I
show you a video, it's all aboutyou, ha, Hilarious concept.
Sometimes I like something and Iwant to share it with you
(25:41):
because I like it and I hope that maybe you'll like it.
I don't. I don't find a video and I'm
like, oh, this is a guaranteed laugh.
I you're just repeating. What I just said, but in favor
of yourself, I'm saying I, I just literally said you're
thinking to yourself. I like this.
Sometimes right? So you just are saying you like
(26:05):
it and you're not really puttingthought into if it's, here's
what I'm saying. I curate your experience.
If you scroll, if you scroll up in your DMS versus my other
three or four friends that I send Tik Toks, they are curated
specifically for you and then they're curated specifically for
(26:26):
others. I don't send the same video to
everyone. I curate your experience for
you. You're welcome.
You just like, find a video you like and go look.
Yeah. I don't think there's anything
wrong with that. If anything, you're grossing me
out. No, then I think you have to
expect that people are it's going to be dud sometimes and
(26:47):
most times maybe. I know, I I know that.
So when you're like people, whenyou're saying that it hurts,
you're saying I had to stop because it hurts when you turn
the phone around and people don't care.
I'm saying I have to stop the inperson experience.
I don't care about the DM. You, you'll either watch it or
(27:07):
like it or you or you won't, right?
I'm talking about I'm with you. It happens sometimes in our own
home. I think it happened.
Most times, yeah. Most times what is happening?
I think you you wait in bed and you're ready to show me one and
then I'm like, OK. Oh my God.
(27:29):
OK, I I guess I'll just be a joyless lump then.
No, I want you to have joy. Just not in this arena.
Wow. So you you think you have a very
curated video Share experience. I mean, I yeah, I do.
What do you think I like? Then what?
(27:51):
What do you think works well forme?
Let me see the last few I've sent you and I'll describe them
as general like pillars of content here.
OK, let's do that. Content pillars.
I sent you the one of a couple with the dog in the middle of
(28:14):
them and they both look at the dog at the same time and the dog
looks at who they love more, which you said you saw and you
were hoping I didn't see it but you thought it was good, no.
Yeah, it was entertaining, but Iabsolutely do not want to do
(28:35):
this in our own home. Why?
Because it ends with one of us being devastated.
It's like asking your kids who their favorite parent is and
then they answer. Yeah, but that could change.
I am telling you right now, I don't know what the answer I I
honestly have no idea which way the dogs would answer.
(28:57):
OK. So you think so we're each on
one side of the dog, We both look at the dog and you think
that if the dog looks at you or puts their head on you, that
I'll and my life. And your life?
No. Be devastated, Yes.
And I think if the dogs do that to you, I'll be devastated.
(29:21):
I just want to try it. I why?
Because what if they do one of us one time and one of us the
next other time? But you want to try it because
you want the dog to look at you.That's why you want to try it,
no? I just, no, I think I just want
to see their reaction because I think it's funny if you look at
them at the same time. I just, I feel like it's a
recipe for disaster. I don't know, I don't want to.
(29:44):
Ignorance is bliss in this situation.
I like to just think they love us both equally.
Maybe they do. Fine.
Do you like? If you had to guess, what would
you say is the answer? What you want me to?
I think they would probably put their head on you 'cause you do
the like, come here, come here, put your like, you do the thing
(30:06):
with them. I don't think but but you give
them all their treats and fun things, you know?
Yeah, I give them carrots everyday and stuff.
It's nerve wracking. That's what I mean.
It's a toss up. OK, so you sent me that.
Mm hmm, I sent you, still wearing the life jacket from the
(30:29):
Titanic, a decrepit dog, looks like 1000 years old and it's
funny. Then I sent you a person doing
weird stuff with their neck and it says I'm going the fuck to
bed. Hilarious.
Objectively. Objectively.
I don't know. I didn't laugh, but go ahead.
(30:50):
How dare you. The year is 2031 and you're
hungover with your AI friends. Hilarious.
The PR team for The Bacheloretteright now.
Hilarious. Plant based salmon
informational. That was good.
(31:12):
Yeah, I I eat mostly plant diet,as do.
You a delivery robot crashes into a Chicago bus shelter.
Hilarious. Yeah, I sent it to you first.
No, you didn't literally scroll up.
Where is it? It's not on TikTok.
I sent it to you somewhere else.OK.
Or showed it to you. Anyways, I feel like all of
(31:33):
these are great. They're good.
Let me let me go through a couple.
I sent you a video about the monetization on Facebook for
content. Some video about couples doing
something funny. Rachel Dratch Everyone's
favorite Rachel Dratch being funny on Jeopardy.
(31:53):
A guy doing a Selena Gomez impression.
A funny dog video. A video about my nightly
adjustment for my chiropractor turned dentist husband that
seems pretty skewed to you. Video about a restaurant closing
that we both like. I don't know, I feel like I
(32:14):
curate pretty well for. You I sent you the Topanga
social thing and I sent you the free LA film permits you.
Just forget that I send you stuff first.
I it's not that I forget, it's that I probably just didn't see
it. You didn't send me the Topanga
thing. I don't see it anywhere in
there. Instagram.
OK. Well, either way, see this is
(32:36):
the kind of energy we can't, we can't introduce more competition
into our household with the dogschoosing somebody.
It's too much. Fine.
Anyway, you're a better curator.We have.
Speaking of curation, Speaking of watching things we have, we
finally caught up. For the most part we have like 2
episodes left of this season of Love is Blind on Netflix.
(33:02):
Yup. I feel like personally, when I
brought this show up a couple months ago, we talked about
watching it like while we were finishing a Love Island and we
both were a little like, yeah, we'll watch it when we watch it.
I but every time we watch it I really enjoy it.
It just moves kind of slow, but I do like I do like the drama.
(33:23):
I am on the edge of my seat for the general plot.
I am too, and I think what I enjoy about it is you.
You get to see how truly horrible some people are at
dating. Yeah, or how people fake it and
then they turn out to be horrible.
I still can't stand Nick and Vanessa Lachey.
(33:45):
It is so triggering every time they're on the screen.
Thankfully they're not on the show very much, otherwise I feel
like it would be a a tune out factor.
They would lose viewers. It is funny how there is there's
some consistency season to season, like the cast is
different, but there is always somebody who can't choose
(34:05):
between two people. There is always somebody who
goes for their number. 2. It goes for their number two.
There is always somebody who at the parties after the fact,
after the reveals and stuff, they, they drink too much and
the truth comes out like that. It's happens every single
season. And it's still another example
(34:27):
of, like, I don't understand fully how people forget that
they're on camera when they say some of these things.
Right, like everyone's going to see this back at some point, so.
Right. Even if you stay with the person
or you break up, they're going to see it eventually, so mind
your P's and Q's. And I think my biggest fear
(34:47):
would not be like, let's let's alternate universe, you're on
this show. My biggest fear would be not are
we going to work on the outside?My biggest fear would be, are we
going to work when the cameras are not here?
Because are you being real? And are we going to work once
you see the season back? And that that's.
(35:09):
This season, Sorry, they're the neighbor.
Dogs are losing their absolute ever loving shit.
Can you hear them? No, no, they're good.
Keep going. This season there's a couple
that I don't know why they bothered getting engaged because
they the girl doesn't want kids and the guy deeply wants kids.
(35:32):
And I don't understand how they made it out of the pods and got
engaged at all because they havecompletely different views on
what they want their future to look like with a family and
without a family. And I just think it's like so
irresponsible and immature of them to have bothered getting
engaged. I don't understand it at all
(35:53):
because as you said, like it would be one thing if they both
were kind of like on the fence, right?
And then it's like, OK, well, neither of us are really hell
bent on it. Neither of us are hell bent, yes
or no. So this is a let's see what
happens and we'll be at peace with whatever happens situation.
(36:14):
As you said, this is staunch. This is the the guy absolutely
comes from a big Italian family.Once once wants kids, the girl
does not. She has health concerns and
other things. I have to say though, there was
a scene with her family where they were backing her up and I
was like, this is refreshing. You're like hell yeah.
(36:34):
Because the they basically are all sitting around there talking
about the kid thing and she saysI didn't want kids.
And the family's like, I'm confused, you don't want kids.
And she's like, well, I can change my mind.
But they were on her side and they were, they were hitting him
with questions of, you know, areyou OK with this?
(36:56):
How bad do you want them? Are you aware she doesn't want
kids? We don't want her to give up her
choices just to make you happy and like.
Or like, yeah, or like, give in and then resent you later and
then or resent the kids or give up all your freedom.
And like, they were like, are you changing your mind for the
right reasons? Or are you just trying to make
(37:16):
him happy? And I mean, I think they're all
handling it well, but it's like,you could have also just picked
someone that also wants a family.
Why are you pushing the boulder up the hill?
Yeah, I don't understand it. I don't understand it.
And it does feel like there's anelement to the show in general
(37:38):
that people, especially this season, people are having like a
really hard time with the concept of leaving the pods
without someone. It's like you're 1 of how many
are on there? 1010 women, 10 men.
It's more, but seven couples gotengaged.
(37:58):
Right. And that's crazy.
Like let's let's say there are 10 and 10 that just make it to
the show, not necessarily engaged.
The chances of you having one ofthose 10 people be your soul
mate are very low. That's like not a lot of that.
The pool is not big. And so it's OK to leave the show
(38:20):
without someone. But there's, I mean, it's crazy
people. I do feel like it comes out of
the place of being bored withouta phone for a handful of days
and they're like, sure, I like you enough.
It's also wanting to be on TV. Yeah, for sure.
But I just don't understand because he's allowed to say my
(38:40):
non negotiable is that I need kids.
And he's like so I'm going to try to convince you to change
your mind whereas she's the one that's either going to change
her mind or not. She's not allowed to say my non
negotiable is that I don't want kids.
I think she's allowed to. But he's the one in the power
position and it's pissing me offso much.
(39:01):
But I also know she equally madethe decision to get engaged.
Like it's not. She's not the victim in this
situation. I just think they're both kind
of stupid for trying to shove a square in a circle hole.
Yeah, I completely agree. Why are we doing this?
His mom almost started crying when she found out the girl
didn't want kids. She's like no, I need grandpa
(39:23):
man. And then the sister of the guy
was like, I need my future children to have cousins.
I need them to have the experience where my kids have
cousins. Like, what do you mean?
That's a really important experience for my kids.
And what? So hey, your kids first of all,
(39:44):
don't exist. And second of all, you're going
to force your brother to have kids so that your stupid kids
have a cousin they see that's sodumb.
And then the sister of the girl that doesn't want kids was like,
(40:06):
I have kids, but if I could do my life all over again, I
wouldn't have them. I know.
I'm like you just said this first of all on a Netflix show.
Yeah, on TV you said this. She's like, I love my kids.
Obviously, I don't know that it's obvious, but if I could
(40:30):
start my life all over again anddo this do get a do over, I
wouldn't have kids. Hey, that's crazy.
And if I heard my mom say that on Netflix when I grew up, I
would need a lot of therapy. Yeah, that's fucked up and a
half. It's that's also one of those
things that's like, hey, if you could, if you have that feeling,
(40:53):
that's when you got to take to the grave.
I'm sorry. You made a choice.
Do you think, I don't know, likedo you think your parents, if
they had a lie detector on, would be like, I'm glad we had
kids? Yeah, yeah, I definitely think
so. I think my mom would would say
(41:15):
yeah, but I don't think definitely not my dad.
No, but I definitely think. So it's crazy to think about
that. I'll I would say over half of
parents probably if they could do it over, wouldn't have kids.
Yeah, at least half. But because I think it it is, I
think it's a complex problem andwe talk about on the podcast all
(41:36):
the time. Like for the longest time it was
not a really an OK opinion to have or a conversation to have
and I do. Think it all.
Spawns out of Go ahead. The anonymous people on Reddit
are constantly saying they regret having children.
Oh, constantly. And I mean, well, that's what
I'm saying. So people say that all the time.
I think the regret part, but they'd yet it has to be
(42:00):
normalized to say that you don'twant them during the dating
phase. And I feel like the biggest flaw
9 times out of 10 is that when you're dating, you have rose
colored glasses on and you're like, oh, we could figure it out
later. And it's like, no, that's not
something that, that's not really how that goes.
That's like, that's a, that's a black and white staunch
(42:24):
difference between two people. You know, it's not something
that can be massaged out. I don't know, very, very weird.
But God, the show is addicting. I don't.
I don't understand how there arepeople out there, if I'm being
honest, that that feel like dating shows are not a good
watch. I don't get that.
(42:46):
I don't either. What's not what?
Do you have against it? I don't get it.
They're they're like it's trashycheap TV.
It's like, yeah, it's it's non complicated TV.
It makes me feel better about being me too.
Also it's relatable, we've all dated.
Unless you're like asexual and have never had a relationship
(43:06):
and you're not interested in one.
It's like the most, I think it'sthe most baseline rate relatable
thing because everyone has at one time or another had a
relationship or wanted a relationship or been through the
same similar themes. So it's like there's no one that
couldn't relate to it really, unless you live under a rock in
(43:29):
a bubble. 100 percent, 100%. And I, I always get enjoyment
out of way more out of a show like Love is Blind or Love
Island than over like The Bachelorette because you get so
many more conversations captured.
And I love the element of you'rein this bubble and you go out
(43:51):
into the real world and discoverthat the person you were talking
to they completely, we're not giving you the full truth about
who they are in in society. Well, that's why I love a
reunion. I do love a reunion, but
reunions are better without NickLachey and or Nick Nick Lachey.
Is it Nick Lachey? Yeah, Nick and Vanessa.
(44:13):
OK God I would like forgot his last name for a second.
This is how not important to theshow they are to me.
Yeah, but they they will suck the air right out of a reunion.
They will, it's true anyway. Love is blind.
Check your local listings. The UK 1 is good too.
You're There is no naked Vanessa.
(44:34):
On Netflix L. OLLOL real quick from the
Reddit. Speaking of thought, you get a
kick out of this, something we talk about all the time, but I
like the way that this person put it on Reddit.
Child free. I'm tired of children in
traditionally adult spaces. My friend said I was being
extreme because I said certain spaces should be child free
(44:56):
naturally. Nice sit down restaurants,
Broadway shows, operas, plays, the gym, bars, places that serve
alcohol. She tried to argue that places
like France and Ireland have kids breweries and the kids are
around alcohol. I said in France they teach
their kids how to be a part of society.
That is true. And I do feel like when you go
(45:17):
to other countries, kids behave differently than they do in the
States. Yeah, absolutely.
And you know how Gen. Z is doing that thing where they
clap with their two fingers? That's what I'm doing right now.
For all of you that can't see, Iam applauding with my index and
my thumb because that person is cracked.
(45:40):
Do you think I can do that? Do you get away with it?
No, it's for gay men and women. You can't partake in this.
You know, sometimes I hate beinga straight white.
I mean, yeah, it's OK to be a self hating straight white.
I think because historically, yeah, it I think it historically
(46:03):
they're not, it's not great. I do agree with that though and
she says later in the post I don't understand why people go
crazy. They said wait one thing, where
did it go? Basically she's saying like
(46:24):
people get pissed off when you make the argument to have no
kids at a place more than they do to make an argument to have a
kid at a place. I know that math doesn't
necessarily make sense. Anyway, the point is we agree.
We agree. Anything else before we go?
I did meet, I met up with a friend today for coffee and
(46:47):
she's newly engaged and I ferreted out, 'cause I didn't
want to be one of those people. It's like, oh, how's the wedding
planning going? Oh, are you going to have kids?
I just, I think I was literally talking about our podcast and
then she said that's the dream. And I said, oh, is it?
(47:09):
I didn't want to assume. And she said, yeah, that's the
dream. We neither of us want kids.
We just want to live our lives. And she also babysits sometimes.
So she's like, it's crazy because I babysit for this
family and like in order just topay me, they have to like make X
amount of money in LA just to like afford to get a babysitter.
(47:32):
And she's like, sometimes they'll ask me the day before
and I I'm busy and so I have to say no and then they just can't
go out. Oh my God.
Isn't that just a bizarre thought and feeling?
I literally like, on Friday was it we we went to a restaurant
down the street from our house and we decided to walk there and
(47:53):
decided to impulsively scooter home.
We couldn't do that. Yeah.
That's awful. Which, ironically, is the same
place they're getting married. OK, that's weird.
Isn't that weird? I go, We just walked over there
randomly the other night and you're they're getting married
(48:13):
there. So I thought it was all very
synchronous. I like that.
It's a that they have a beautiful DINK life.
I'm I, you know what? I don't know them well enough to
get invited to the wedding, but if I had to officiate last
second, I would. I, I, I'm throwing it out there,
(48:33):
I would be happy to walk over and officiate and give, you
know, a speech about being Dinks.
Yeah, you're willing to sub in at any time?
Yeah. Would you officiate a wedding?
Like would you want to? I'm actually like low key
offended and shocked that it hasn't happened yet.
I am surprised. I'm surprised.
(48:54):
The fuck? I feel like I was asked by
somebody at some point. And you said no.
Yeah, I don't want to do it. No, it's.
I really don't want to. Wait, you said no?
No, I think it was like I did. They didn't officially ask me.
It was more so like, oh, you could do it and it was like in
the middle of a different conversation.
(49:15):
So it wasn't like a formal request.
It was kind of, I think they were trying to feel me out if I
wanted to do it or not, but I don't want to do it.
I really don't. And I don't think I'll be asked
ever again. And I'm cool with that because
it's a lot of pressure. I and I give it, I hats off to
people who do it and do it well because it's like, it's not,
it's not really about you. It's somebody else's big day.
(49:38):
And that's I don't want to ruin or make somebody else's big day,
you know what I mean? I guess I thrive under the
pressure and I think, you know, I trust myself more than other
people and I do think there's a chance I would officiate my best
(50:01):
friend's wedding. Yeah, because.
She has she has a bunch of othergirlfriends that I think would
end up being bridesmaids and stuff and childhood friends that
might be maid of honor or whatever.
Can I think I think this even came up on an old episode.
I'm pretty sure that her fiance said something about me
(50:22):
officiating like in his head andthis was a year ago.
I would love I, I'm hoping that happens because I would love to
watch you do it. You think?
I kind of want, I kind of want to watch you do it, but not
having written any of it. Oh, just like off the cuff.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I feel like that would be
great. That's funny.
(50:44):
Just winging it live. Let's do it live.
We'll do it live. Fuck it, you're married.
Kiss the bride. I like, kiss her God damn it
anyway. Bud, I would have to do it
without swearing. Tough, tough.
That would be hard. That would be hard.
But you have time. You have time to figure it.
(51:04):
Out. Imagine if they let kids be
present at their wedding and a kid steps on one of my punch
lines. That kid doesn't make it to the
reception. The way I would stop down
everything. Yeah, Excuse me, what the hell
was that? Kick him out, security.
(51:27):
I thought this was a kid free wedding.
Oh no, that was my own. Never mind.
I I hope to see the day. I hope.
I hope that we can see you officiate a wedding.
I want to see you on Big Brother, and at some point we'll
get you on a dating show somehow.
Sure. Just yeah.
OK, after a pesky little divorce.
Now, we, we talked about this, we'll, we'll figure out a way to
(51:49):
fake it. OK.
All right, well, go have a good week, everyone.
Bye.
There's a new term buzzing on the Internet, Dick.
Dual income? No, kid, you probably have an
opinion on these people or an opinion on people who have an
opinion on these people. America's birth rate has hit its
lowest point in more than a century.
Some are blaming it on infertility.
Others say the state of the world is causing couples to
think twice about having children.
(00:21):
Childless marriages could be a good thing if they were a result
of God's sovereign providential work.
Oh my God, can't even hear you. They like avocado toast and
brunches out and going to plays and having sweet vacations.
You're probably super selfish. Kids are better than brunch.
And then there's another group of young couples that want the
(00:43):
lifestyle of childless households and the lifestyle it
brings with it. Welcome to The DINK Side, the
podcast about life, laughs and living child free.
We're a double income, no kids couple navigating the UPS sounds
and hilarious inbetweens of choosing a different path in a
world that won't stop asking. So when are you having kids?
(01:05):
When are you going to do it? And we're not the only ones that
are asked that question. As you find out today, people on
television are often asked that question as well.
But I wanted to start today, babe, by just posing a simple
question or a statement. I guess it's very simple.
I don't know how people do it. I don't know how people afford
(01:27):
having children. And the reason I bring this up
right now is because we've had afew recent life experiences that
make me question this exact thing.
Number one, this weekend we wentto shop for eyeglasses.
Yeah, you got a pair of glasses.I'm trying to find a pair of
glasses. I don't know how.
(01:50):
Why are they so goddamn expensive?
I don't know. And we're, we went to Warby
Parker, Jins, JINS both like I think are chains and then
they're all around the $200 range.
And then we went to one other one in silver, like a boutique,
(02:13):
and it was like appointment only.
And then they let us in randomly.
We didn't have an appointment, but we like looked sad at the
door and you were trying some on.
And then you're like, oh, just out of curiosity, like how much
are these 'cause they have no prices on them, which is always
a bad sign. It's.
(02:34):
Yeah, and what did she say? Like 785 or something or.
Nine. That would have been a bargain,
$960. Jesus.
Christ and they were like plastic.
That's the thing that I don't understand about expensive
frames, because people often crap on Warby Parker because
they're cheap plastic. People often crap on zenni.com
(02:56):
or 1800 contacts, whatever all these online ones are, and I
don't get it because they're made of the same material as the
$960 pair. It's not like you're putting
these on and it's like, oh, these are stainless steel, these
are made of gold, These are diamond crusted.
They're just plastic. Yeah, they're not 14 karat.
(03:18):
I think you're paying for the designer, but again, but they're
also not like Prada. No, they're not.
No, they're just rando. Nobody's going to stop you in
the street and go, oh, those areso and so.
It's the same thing as, like, pillows.
Yeah, where it's like, this is technically fabric and fluff,
(03:38):
but why is this $80? Right.
It makes no sense and it's very frustrating because I, I've been
trying to find a pair and it's like finding a new, I don't
know, a new persona. It's very difficult because I
also want to go a little bit bold, but I think I am a little
afraid of going bold, but I'm going to do it.
(04:00):
I guess what do you mean by bold?
Because I feel like you've triedon some pretty bold ones and
then you think then you don't like them.
I think that I think it's I, I, I do like them, but I'm just
looking for the right bold pair.Like this is a very similar,
it's a very similar feeling to wanting my first tattoo.
(04:23):
I want to get one, but I feel like I don't, I don't what, what
my ideal scenario is. I get a tattoo that I like and
almost nobody knows that I have one.
Do you know what I mean? Why?
Because it's on your ass or likeyou.
No, no, I just mean like, I don't like the attention that
(04:45):
comes with it. I don't need, I'm not getting
the tattoo for other people to be like, Oh my God, I love your
Tata. I just want to get the tattoo
because I like it. I like the way it looks on me.
I have. I guess what I'm saying is I've
had too many experiences with eyeglasses in my life where I
get a new pair and it's all people can talk about to my
face. For like a day.
(05:08):
No, for like several weeks. OK, I feel like you're gravely
overestimating the amount of people that will give a shit
when you get a tattoo. Like they're going to maybe
mention it once if they happen to see it on your arm or
something. Yeah, like you've seen every
time I get a tattoo. Like it's like people don't
(05:28):
care. It's not really even a headline.
Yeah, I guess I don't know. I just, I don't.
I think if you get like 70s gameshow host glasses then maybe
people will talk about it but. That's kind of the ones I want,
you know what I mean? Yeah, but then every time you
try ones on that look like a 70sgame show host, you're like, I
(05:49):
don't like this. No, it's just I don't like those
particular ones. I'm just, I'm looking for that
golden pair, you know, now seeing.
Myself in this window. I feel like these are too big
for my head now. No, not at all.
I literally before we started recording, I told you that I
liked your glasses. I just had to kill a bug, sorry.
(06:12):
That's OK, we will hold for bug.Jesus Christ, you're sick.
So no, we had to get glasses. That was the whole thing.
You got to pay for the exam, yougot to pay for the glasses, you
got to pay for the lenses. You it's expensive as hell.
And then on top of that I I got a car a few months ago and it's
(06:33):
already kaput. It Yeah, it's a lemon.
It's a lemon. It's a lemon and.
People keep saying to me like, isn't there a lemon law?
Yes there is if you buy a new car.
Not a 2012. No, 2012, it's generous.
It's 2005. Oh shit.
(06:55):
So I fear that ship has sailed, you know.
Yeah, so it's not a lemon, it's just old.
Yeah, I. OK, back to the glasses real
quick. Hot cake, I thought.
I actually thought of this whilewe were in line at the farmers
market. I looked behind us and there was
a little girl with glasses on. She was like 3 and I think I
(07:18):
like kids in glasses. OK.
Because it's giving 70 year old and a three-year old body.
Yeah, I like that. They I like.
I turned around and I was immediate.
I don't even know this girl. I don't know her personality.
She might suck, but I immediately was more disarmed
because I was like, oh, she's like a little old lady, but
(07:40):
she's 3. Like it made.
And you know what? I actually think that might
transfer to her personality, even though we still have no
proof and I didn't introduce myself.
I think that having glasses as alittle kid probably bakes into
your personality like no other 3year old.
Like probably 1 out of 103 year olds have glasses or whatever,
(08:03):
or one out of 200 or whatever the stats are.
Probably pretty high actually. OK, well it probably makes you
have more of a personality because you're not like other 3
year olds. That's true.
I never thought about that so. Then they probably turn out
cooler than other kids and I think I like little kids that
(08:25):
wear glasses but also picture how expensive that is because
their heads are always growing in size and I'm sure their
prescription is changing and whatever blah blah blah.
So then you have to keep buying the glasses.
And also that's not even counting the kid is 3.
So do they break the glasses once a month?
(08:46):
Right. By falling like they fall off of
their head, or they fall on the ground or they scratch them or
whatever. I'm sure you have to pay for the
scratch. Resistant as hell, like
indestructible ones, and then they're too small for their head
in six months. I remember when I got my first
pair and it was a very like, it was a funny time when I was in.
(09:09):
It's probably 4th or 5th grade or something like that.
And it was around that time whenyou start kids start getting
glasses because you start to understand, like, you're not
reading the math up on the whiteboard, you know?
And it was always interesting tosee.
Like, I feel like it changed people's personalities a bit,
you know, because they just like, have a different vibe now.
(09:31):
So it's a very important decision when you're getting
your first pair of glasses, which one you're going to go
with and everything. But I remember when I was a kid,
like now as an adult, I, if I get a new pair, my old pair has
like maybe a scratch or two on the lens, but they're in pretty
good shape. When I was a kid, my old pair
would be like, there was shit falling off of it.
The lens popped out. We had to put the lens back in.
(09:54):
They're, you know, glued together in some cases.
Like kids wear those things hard.
You're absolutely right. Yeah, I I can't imagine.
It's probably like what, 800 bucks a year for your kid to
have glasses or something? Probably.
And it's like, is it worth it? I I don't know, do they need to
(10:14):
have clear vision? Blurry.
Also, how do you even find out that your kid needs glasses?
Are they like, oh, I can't read?Like, yeah, it's three.
I don't know. No, I think there's a period.
Go to the eye doctor I guess. Yeah, I think you're like
required to, to go. Well, actually I, I, I remember
(10:35):
it now. I was when I was in 3rd or 4th
grade and we had to do like a yearly physical at school as a
part of like the presidential fitness test or whatever.
And the nurse doing that part ofit would take a look at your
eyes. And if you didn't pass a certain
threshold then they'd send a note home to your parents and be
like hey I don't think he can read.
(10:58):
This might be why his grades areso bad.
That was kind of like the scoliosis test where they were
like, oh, bend over. Which in hindsight, it was such
a bullshit to us. They're just like bend over and
we're just going to see. We're just going to look and see
if your spine looks crooked to the eye.
So much of that stuff feels likeI think about this stuff all the
(11:21):
time. Actually, the nurse I would go
to when I was a kid, like workedin the office at my school.
What, what was her medical degree?
Did she have one? You know what I mean?
Like she wasn't qualified, most likely.
I, I went to a private Lutheran school.
They. She was probably like.
Praying it away in there. Yeah, a volunteer.
(11:43):
And. Was she even getting paid?
Do you remember doing all of those yearly?
The presidential fitness tests and all that.
Yeah. Where did you fare?
Like, were you top of the class?Somewhere in the middle.
I was in the middle. I could hang from the pull up
bar, but I couldn't do a pull up.
I could run a mile. Yeah, I could touch my toes.
(12:06):
But you know, the flexibility one.
Yeah, like I was OK, but not like great.
I think I was. I think I remember being pretty
good but not like top of my class but it got weirdly
competitive. Could you do a pull up?
Yeah I could do a pull up I don't know if I could do AI
(12:27):
think I could do a pull up now really not yeah, just not not a
ton of them but I OK well I'll have to let's find a bar I'll do
I'll see if there's one at the gym tonight and I'll and I'll
report we. Don't still have a pull up bar?
No, I don't think so. We sell it.
We sold in our garage sale, I'm pretty sure.
(12:48):
Which, by the way, we stopped bya friend's garage sale over the
weekend. Exhilarating.
Yeah, exhilarating. We.
It's like you catch the bug all over again.
And I mentioned to you, I think that garage sales still seem
like a very untapped entertainment source.
Yeah. There's got to be like, you
(13:11):
know, these simulator games. Did I tell you last week that
the most one of the most populargames on Steam right now is a a
video store rental simulator? Essentially the game is you open
a Blockbuster and you run the Blockbuster.
That's cool. I feel like there should be a
game show where they put three fake garage sales and you have
(13:32):
to go and you can only pick fouritems and whoever's are
technically worth the most combined when like you have to
go rummage through everything and it's kind of like a
scavenger hunt. So it's like Supermarket Sweep
but your cart and your cart has to equal the most.
But it's a garage sale version. I think what you're describing
(13:55):
is the show Storage Wars. Yeah, it's a good, I mean, it's
a great idea. I love it.
This is why people love storage.Wars.
Got it. OK.
But I was, I was bummed to find out that show was like staged.
(14:17):
They're they like pre pack? Yeah, they like pre pack the
storage units at this point. They do, yeah.
It's not real. No, not fully.
Not fully. Fuck off.
And so the people are cast. Well, the there's the same cast
every episode it's the same. People like the people bidding
(14:37):
on it. Yeah, it's the same people who
bid on it in every episode. So that when they win the bid,
they don't actually get the stuff because it's fake.
No, they do. So have you ever watched Let's
Start it Worse, it's occurring to me.
Maybe you've never seen the storage?
I've watched it literally with you.
(14:58):
I don't know if you have maybe II think you're thinking of
something. Else I know so bid on a thing
they they open a storage unit, they can't look through it, but
they can look at it. Yeah, it's accurate.
And they bid and whoever wins the bid then gets the unit of
stuff and then. They sell it the same people
(15:18):
bidding every episode. Fine, but then do they actually
get the stuff in it? I don't think so.
Like all of the all of the people who were involved in that
show allegedly at some point or another owned like a thrift
store or consignment store and they were at these places to get
the stuff to sell at their stores.
Right now, I'm pretty sure they just load them up and do it for
(15:41):
entertainment value. And I know, I know.
I mean, Gary Vee for a while on YouTube was going to garage
sales and we watched those videos and they're exhilarating.
Ah, I just, it's a, it's an untapped market.
I love a garage sale. We were joking that we wanted to
sell more stuff and like you could just sell your car for
(16:02):
$5.00 an hour. Yeah, I, I probably should I
probably. Should I had a friend in my car?
Well, whatever. An acquaintance, an enemy.
No, I had a friend in my car. And I was saying like, oh, yeah,
(16:23):
clearly it's not a family car. It's a small Fiat.
And my husband drives a Mini, and the Mini just broke down.
And he, I was like, not a familycar.
And he's like, yeah, you couldn't put a kid back there,
at least legally. And then it made me think, can
you not put a kid in the back seat if it's not a 4 door?
(16:45):
Wait. Can you not put a kid at all?
This is a This is incredible information.
This is I can't even. I can't host a child in my car,
period. Yeah, first of all, not invited.
Second of all, can't really. Happen illegal, then I can go oh
oh I I would I would take your kid in my car, but it's illegal.
(17:07):
Sorry. No, I mean according to the
Highway Patrol website it is legal to put a kid in a 2 door
car as long as they are in an age appropriate car seat,
booster seat, or seat belt. So I could technically put a car
seat in the Fiat. Only if you can get the car seat
in there and attach it properly,which is probably not possible
(17:28):
in your car. So success we did it.
Fine, I guess. I guess I'm wrong.
Now, but I, it's a good question.
I mean, you brought that up. I was like, Hank, it's certainly
not convenient. You know, it's not going to be
something that people volunteer to do.
But yeah, I, we, it's, we have two 2 door cars, or at least we
(17:51):
did mine, like I said, bit the dust.
This is probably the record for the, the shortest amount of
time, time I've owned a car. Jesus.
RIP. Yeah, it's only been a couple of
months. How?
Literally like 3. It's been about, it's been about
six weeks. It's been about six or seven
(18:14):
weeks, I believe. That's it.
Yeah, isn't that awful? That's really sad.
It's really, really bad. But this is another example of
like, I don't know what people do when the minivan breaks down,
you know, right? Cars are not cheap.
They're expensive anyway. You OK?
Did something happen in there? I heard a noise.
(18:37):
Are the dogs revolting? Sure, yeah.
They're like we can fit in the car.
How was your weekend? You did some shows, You were
travelling with some friends. We're considering this
travelling. You said something kept coming
up in the car that you weren't happy about.
Oh, it's just like I was drivinga comic around town.
(19:01):
And by a town I mean out to San Bernardino.
So it was like 2 hours each way or whatever.
And like, he's a dad of two kidsand, you know, actively knows
how much I don't like kids or want kids.
But he just kept like, I'm driving, I'm looking at the road
(19:22):
and he's putting his phone in front of my face to show me
videos of his kid dancing and then videos of his other kid.
Like, like the at one point he was holding his phone up so I
could listen to his wife and like his kids like shrieking in
my ear and then showing me more videos of his kid dancing.
(19:43):
And I'm like having to be like aha, like, wow.
I just don't. I'm like, I'm driving like I'm
looking at the road first of all.
So you showing me videos of anything risky, but then showing
me videos of your kid and me feigning interest.
Like I just think it's audacious.
(20:05):
And then also it's like, you know me and you hear my jokes
about not liking kids all the time.
And like, you literally know I have a podcast about not wanting
kids, but you're like, it's justlike, OK.
I didn't ask, they were unsolicited videos.
Yeah. You know what I mean?
I I have a similar experience. I work with a handful of nice
(20:30):
people who were who are very happy about having nieces and
nephews and things and there's absolutely nothing wrong with
that. And they, they like to show
pictures, which again, nothing wrong with that.
Absolutely nothing wrong with that, but it's become.
Unsolicited. Well, I don't.
I don't mind it. I don't mind it as a general
(20:53):
practice. What I find confusing is that it
is a multiple times a day practice.
Oh my God. And I'm like I, I this is, this
is I like it. I by the way, I, I love dogs.
And if somebody showed me the same ish picture of their dog 12
(21:15):
times a day I'd be like OK I understand.
I think it would be weird if I unsolicited showed a video of
our dog to people that weren't didn't ask to see one.
Like little bit I especially andwhile they're driving.
Like I'm in the car with an acquaintance and I'm showing
them videos of my dog doing something while they're driving
(21:35):
is like weird. And so I think it's like any
video of anything, one, while you're driving and two, I didn't
ask for this. But then also it makes me feel
like people don't know me. I'm like, does this seem like
something I wanted to see like Idon't?
And then I'm in this weird. Position where I have to go.
(21:56):
Cool. How many different reactions are
there to your kids flailing around?
That is why on the opposite end of that stick, I I have stopped.
I have stopped showing people pictures and videos and whether
it's from my personal life or something I saw online that I
think is funny, I've stopped sharing my phone and like, hey,
(22:18):
look at this, check this out because I cannot deal with the
heartbreak anymore. I can't do it.
It's already of somebody go likeme finding a funny video, for
example, and showing it to them and then be like, Oh yes,
humorous. That is heartbreaking.
That is the most vulnerable human experience is check out
(22:39):
this video I think is funny in front of a person.
I think that it's like the same as that game.
What is it called Cards Against Humanity where you there's a
person deciding which card is funnier?
You noted. And I think that showing someone
a funny TikTok video like I pride myself on I there's only
(23:04):
like 4 or five people that I send Tiktok videos to.
Yeah. And I pride myself on knowing
which videos to send, which people of which which videos
which people are going to find funny.
Right, like what they respond to?
Right. Their sense of humor
specifically. And I think that you're not as
(23:29):
good at knowing which audience for which video.
I first of all, what makes you say that?
Hang on a second. I don't.
I was not prepared for this level of intervention.
OK, You really, you really backdoored me there.
(23:50):
It's like the it's like in CardsAgainst Humanity.
Like, I think you need to like, think harder, think harder about
your audience. OK.
And you're just kind of like, I like this, so everyone should
like it. Ouch.
First of all, it's getting worse.
You're like you're the daggers are coming out.
(24:12):
Ouch. Do you think, based on your
experience with people's reactions lately, do you think
I'm wrong? OK, I need to pause you right
there and ask multiple follow upquestions before I even answer
that. Number one, though, you asked
that as if you have had conversations behind the doors
with many people in my. Life.
(24:33):
The Doors. Behind the scenes is that, is
that something that's happened? No.
Have you the hesitation in your voice?
You're killing me on this. You Have you had sidebar
conversations with people that we know about how terrible I am
at sending videos? No.
OK. What makes you think that?
I don't know what somebody's going to respond well to, I'm
(24:56):
guess. I guess you're speaking for
yourself here. Yeah, the videos that you save
and then you're like, look at this.
And I'm like, OK, I am. And I'm the person you should
know the most of what I would respond to.
I think you're thinking of this.If you.
So. I'm saying if you show me duds,
(25:19):
then what are you showing other people?
OK, I don't like this. First of all, First of all,
welcome to the Dinkside Crossfire.
By the way, I, I'm not the, the fact that you think that when I
show you a video, it's all aboutyou, ha, Hilarious concept.
Sometimes I like something and Iwant to share it with you
(25:41):
because I like it and I hope that maybe you'll like it.
I don't. I don't find a video and I'm
like, oh, this is a guaranteed laugh.
I you're just repeating. What I just said, but in favor
of yourself, I'm saying I, I just literally said you're
thinking to yourself. I like this.
Sometimes right? So you just are saying you like
(26:05):
it and you're not really puttingthought into if it's, here's
what I'm saying. I curate your experience.
If you scroll, if you scroll up in your DMS versus my other
three or four friends that I send Tik Toks, they are curated
specifically for you and then they're curated specifically for
(26:26):
others. I don't send the same video to
everyone. I curate your experience for
you. You're welcome.
You just like, find a video you like and go look.
Yeah. I don't think there's anything
wrong with that. If anything, you're grossing me
out. No, then I think you have to
expect that people are it's going to be dud sometimes and
(26:47):
most times maybe. I know, I I know that.
So when you're like people, whenyou're saying that it hurts,
you're saying I had to stop because it hurts when you turn
the phone around and people don't care.
I'm saying I have to stop the inperson experience.
I don't care about the DM. You, you'll either watch it or
(27:07):
like it or you or you won't, right?
I'm talking about I'm with you. It happens sometimes in our own
home. I think it happened.
Most times, yeah. Most times what is happening?
I think you you wait in bed and you're ready to show me one and
then I'm like, OK. Oh my God.
(27:29):
OK, I I guess I'll just be a joyless lump then.
No, I want you to have joy. Just not in this arena.
Wow. So you you think you have a very
curated video Share experience. I mean, I yeah, I do.
What do you think I like? Then what?
(27:51):
What do you think works well forme?
Let me see the last few I've sent you and I'll describe them
as general like pillars of content here.
OK, let's do that. Content pillars.
I sent you the one of a couple with the dog in the middle of
(28:14):
them and they both look at the dog at the same time and the dog
looks at who they love more, which you said you saw and you
were hoping I didn't see it but you thought it was good, no.
Yeah, it was entertaining, but Iabsolutely do not want to do
(28:35):
this in our own home. Why?
Because it ends with one of us being devastated.
It's like asking your kids who their favorite parent is and
then they answer. Yeah, but that could change.
I am telling you right now, I don't know what the answer I I
honestly have no idea which way the dogs would answer.
(28:57):
OK. So you think so we're each on
one side of the dog, We both look at the dog and you think
that if the dog looks at you or puts their head on you, that
I'll and my life. And your life?
No. Be devastated, Yes.
And I think if the dogs do that to you, I'll be devastated.
(29:21):
I just want to try it. I why?
Because what if they do one of us one time and one of us the
next other time? But you want to try it because
you want the dog to look at you.That's why you want to try it,
no? I just, no, I think I just want
to see their reaction because I think it's funny if you look at
them at the same time. I just, I feel like it's a
recipe for disaster. I don't know, I don't want to.
(29:44):
Ignorance is bliss in this situation.
I like to just think they love us both equally.
Maybe they do. Fine.
Do you like? If you had to guess, what would
you say is the answer? What you want me to?
I think they would probably put their head on you 'cause you do
the like, come here, come here, put your like, you do the thing
(30:06):
with them. I don't think but but you give
them all their treats and fun things, you know?
Yeah, I give them carrots everyday and stuff.
It's nerve wracking. That's what I mean.
It's a toss up. OK, so you sent me that.
Mm hmm, I sent you, still wearing the life jacket from the
(30:29):
Titanic, a decrepit dog, looks like 1000 years old and it's
funny. Then I sent you a person doing
weird stuff with their neck and it says I'm going the fuck to
bed. Hilarious.
Objectively. Objectively.
I don't know. I didn't laugh, but go ahead.
(30:50):
How dare you. The year is 2031 and you're
hungover with your AI friends. Hilarious.
The PR team for The Bacheloretteright now.
Hilarious. Plant based salmon
informational. That was good.
(31:12):
Yeah, I I eat mostly plant diet,as do.
You a delivery robot crashes into a Chicago bus shelter.
Hilarious. Yeah, I sent it to you first.
No, you didn't literally scroll up.
Where is it? It's not on TikTok.
I sent it to you somewhere else.OK.
Or showed it to you. Anyways, I feel like all of
(31:33):
these are great. They're good.
Let me let me go through a couple.
I sent you a video about the monetization on Facebook for
content. Some video about couples doing
something funny. Rachel Dratch Everyone's
favorite Rachel Dratch being funny on Jeopardy.
(31:53):
A guy doing a Selena Gomez impression.
A funny dog video. A video about my nightly
adjustment for my chiropractor turned dentist husband that
seems pretty skewed to you. Video about a restaurant closing
that we both like. I don't know, I feel like I
(32:14):
curate pretty well for. You I sent you the Topanga
social thing and I sent you the free LA film permits you.
Just forget that I send you stuff first.
I it's not that I forget, it's that I probably just didn't see
it. You didn't send me the Topanga
thing. I don't see it anywhere in
there. Instagram.
OK. Well, either way, see this is
(32:36):
the kind of energy we can't, we can't introduce more competition
into our household with the dogschoosing somebody.
It's too much. Fine.
Anyway, you're a better curator.We have.
Speaking of curation, Speaking of watching things we have, we
finally caught up. For the most part we have like 2
episodes left of this season of Love is Blind on Netflix.
(33:02):
Yup. I feel like personally, when I
brought this show up a couple months ago, we talked about
watching it like while we were finishing a Love Island and we
both were a little like, yeah, we'll watch it when we watch it.
I but every time we watch it I really enjoy it.
It just moves kind of slow, but I do like I do like the drama.
(33:23):
I am on the edge of my seat for the general plot.
I am too, and I think what I enjoy about it is you.
You get to see how truly horrible some people are at
dating. Yeah, or how people fake it and
then they turn out to be horrible.
I still can't stand Nick and Vanessa Lachey.
(33:45):
It is so triggering every time they're on the screen.
Thankfully they're not on the show very much, otherwise I feel
like it would be a a tune out factor.
They would lose viewers. It is funny how there is there's
some consistency season to season, like the cast is
different, but there is always somebody who can't choose
(34:05):
between two people. There is always somebody who
goes for their number. 2. It goes for their number two.
There is always somebody who at the parties after the fact,
after the reveals and stuff, they, they drink too much and
the truth comes out like that. It's happens every single
season. And it's still another example
(34:27):
of, like, I don't understand fully how people forget that
they're on camera when they say some of these things.
Right, like everyone's going to see this back at some point, so.
Right. Even if you stay with the person
or you break up, they're going to see it eventually, so mind
your P's and Q's. And I think my biggest fear
(34:47):
would not be like, let's let's alternate universe, you're on
this show. My biggest fear would be not are
we going to work on the outside?My biggest fear would be, are we
going to work when the cameras are not here?
Because are you being real? And are we going to work once
you see the season back? And that that's.
(35:09):
This season, Sorry, they're the neighbor.
Dogs are losing their absolute ever loving shit.
Can you hear them? No, no, they're good.
Keep going. This season there's a couple
that I don't know why they bothered getting engaged because
they the girl doesn't want kids and the guy deeply wants kids.
(35:32):
And I don't understand how they made it out of the pods and got
engaged at all because they havecompletely different views on
what they want their future to look like with a family and
without a family. And I just think it's like so
irresponsible and immature of them to have bothered getting
engaged. I don't understand it at all
(35:53):
because as you said, like it would be one thing if they both
were kind of like on the fence, right?
And then it's like, OK, well, neither of us are really hell
bent on it. Neither of us are hell bent, yes
or no. So this is a let's see what
happens and we'll be at peace with whatever happens situation.
(36:14):
As you said, this is staunch. This is the the guy absolutely
comes from a big Italian family.Once once wants kids, the girl
does not. She has health concerns and
other things. I have to say though, there was
a scene with her family where they were backing her up and I
was like, this is refreshing. You're like hell yeah.
(36:34):
Because the they basically are all sitting around there talking
about the kid thing and she saysI didn't want kids.
And the family's like, I'm confused, you don't want kids.
And she's like, well, I can change my mind.
But they were on her side and they were, they were hitting him
with questions of, you know, areyou OK with this?
(36:56):
How bad do you want them? Are you aware she doesn't want
kids? We don't want her to give up her
choices just to make you happy and like.
Or like, yeah, or like, give in and then resent you later and
then or resent the kids or give up all your freedom.
And like, they were like, are you changing your mind for the
right reasons? Or are you just trying to make
(37:16):
him happy? And I mean, I think they're all
handling it well, but it's like,you could have also just picked
someone that also wants a family.
Why are you pushing the boulder up the hill?
Yeah, I don't understand it. I don't understand it.
And it does feel like there's anelement to the show in general
(37:38):
that people, especially this season, people are having like a
really hard time with the concept of leaving the pods
without someone. It's like you're 1 of how many
are on there? 1010 women, 10 men.
It's more, but seven couples gotengaged.
(37:58):
Right. And that's crazy.
Like let's let's say there are 10 and 10 that just make it to
the show, not necessarily engaged.
The chances of you having one ofthose 10 people be your soul
mate are very low. That's like not a lot of that.
The pool is not big. And so it's OK to leave the show
(38:20):
without someone. But there's, I mean, it's crazy
people. I do feel like it comes out of
the place of being bored withouta phone for a handful of days
and they're like, sure, I like you enough.
It's also wanting to be on TV. Yeah, for sure.
But I just don't understand because he's allowed to say my
(38:40):
non negotiable is that I need kids.
And he's like so I'm going to try to convince you to change
your mind whereas she's the one that's either going to change
her mind or not. She's not allowed to say my non
negotiable is that I don't want kids.
I think she's allowed to. But he's the one in the power
position and it's pissing me offso much.
(39:01):
But I also know she equally madethe decision to get engaged.
Like it's not. She's not the victim in this
situation. I just think they're both kind
of stupid for trying to shove a square in a circle hole.
Yeah, I completely agree. Why are we doing this?
His mom almost started crying when she found out the girl
didn't want kids. She's like no, I need grandpa
(39:23):
man. And then the sister of the guy
was like, I need my future children to have cousins.
I need them to have the experience where my kids have
cousins. Like, what do you mean?
That's a really important experience for my kids.
And what? So hey, your kids first of all,
(39:44):
don't exist. And second of all, you're going
to force your brother to have kids so that your stupid kids
have a cousin they see that's sodumb.
And then the sister of the girl that doesn't want kids was like,
(40:06):
I have kids, but if I could do my life all over again, I
wouldn't have them. I know.
I'm like you just said this first of all on a Netflix show.
Yeah, on TV you said this. She's like, I love my kids.
Obviously, I don't know that it's obvious, but if I could
(40:30):
start my life all over again anddo this do get a do over, I
wouldn't have kids. Hey, that's crazy.
And if I heard my mom say that on Netflix when I grew up, I
would need a lot of therapy. Yeah, that's fucked up and a
half. It's that's also one of those
things that's like, hey, if you could, if you have that feeling,
(40:53):
that's when you got to take to the grave.
I'm sorry. You made a choice.
Do you think, I don't know, likedo you think your parents, if
they had a lie detector on, would be like, I'm glad we had
kids? Yeah, yeah, I definitely think
so. I think my mom would would say
(41:15):
yeah, but I don't think definitely not my dad.
No, but I definitely think. So it's crazy to think about
that. I'll I would say over half of
parents probably if they could do it over, wouldn't have kids.
Yeah, at least half. But because I think it it is, I
think it's a complex problem andwe talk about on the podcast all
(41:36):
the time. Like for the longest time it was
not a really an OK opinion to have or a conversation to have
and I do. Think it all.
Spawns out of Go ahead. The anonymous people on Reddit
are constantly saying they regret having children.
Oh, constantly. And I mean, well, that's what
I'm saying. So people say that all the time.
I think the regret part, but they'd yet it has to be
(42:00):
normalized to say that you don'twant them during the dating
phase. And I feel like the biggest flaw
9 times out of 10 is that when you're dating, you have rose
colored glasses on and you're like, oh, we could figure it out
later. And it's like, no, that's not
something that, that's not really how that goes.
That's like, that's a, that's a black and white staunch
(42:24):
difference between two people. You know, it's not something
that can be massaged out. I don't know, very, very weird.
But God, the show is addicting. I don't.
I don't understand how there arepeople out there, if I'm being
honest, that that feel like dating shows are not a good
watch. I don't get that.
(42:46):
I don't either. What's not what?
Do you have against it? I don't get it.
They're they're like it's trashycheap TV.
It's like, yeah, it's it's non complicated TV.
It makes me feel better about being me too.
Also it's relatable, we've all dated.
Unless you're like asexual and have never had a relationship
(43:06):
and you're not interested in one.
It's like the most, I think it'sthe most baseline rate relatable
thing because everyone has at one time or another had a
relationship or wanted a relationship or been through the
same similar themes. So it's like there's no one that
couldn't relate to it really, unless you live under a rock in
(43:29):
a bubble. 100 percent, 100%. And I, I always get enjoyment
out of way more out of a show like Love is Blind or Love
Island than over like The Bachelorette because you get so
many more conversations captured.
And I love the element of you'rein this bubble and you go out
(43:51):
into the real world and discoverthat the person you were talking
to they completely, we're not giving you the full truth about
who they are in in society. Well, that's why I love a
reunion. I do love a reunion, but
reunions are better without NickLachey and or Nick Nick Lachey.
Is it Nick Lachey? Yeah, Nick and Vanessa.
(44:13):
OK God I would like forgot his last name for a second.
This is how not important to theshow they are to me.
Yeah, but they they will suck the air right out of a reunion.
They will, it's true anyway. Love is blind.
Check your local listings. The UK 1 is good too.
You're There is no naked Vanessa.
(44:34):
On Netflix L. OLLOL real quick from the
Reddit. Speaking of thought, you get a
kick out of this, something we talk about all the time, but I
like the way that this person put it on Reddit.
Child free. I'm tired of children in
traditionally adult spaces. My friend said I was being
extreme because I said certain spaces should be child free
(44:56):
naturally. Nice sit down restaurants,
Broadway shows, operas, plays, the gym, bars, places that serve
alcohol. She tried to argue that places
like France and Ireland have kids breweries and the kids are
around alcohol. I said in France they teach
their kids how to be a part of society.
That is true. And I do feel like when you go
(45:17):
to other countries, kids behave differently than they do in the
States. Yeah, absolutely.
And you know how Gen. Z is doing that thing where they
clap with their two fingers? That's what I'm doing right now.
For all of you that can't see, Iam applauding with my index and
my thumb because that person is cracked.
(45:40):
Do you think I can do that? Do you get away with it?
No, it's for gay men and women. You can't partake in this.
You know, sometimes I hate beinga straight white.
I mean, yeah, it's OK to be a self hating straight white.
I think because historically, yeah, it I think it historically
(46:03):
they're not, it's not great. I do agree with that though and
she says later in the post I don't understand why people go
crazy. They said wait one thing, where
did it go? Basically she's saying like
(46:24):
people get pissed off when you make the argument to have no
kids at a place more than they do to make an argument to have a
kid at a place. I know that math doesn't
necessarily make sense. Anyway, the point is we agree.
We agree. Anything else before we go?
I did meet, I met up with a friend today for coffee and
(46:47):
she's newly engaged and I ferreted out, 'cause I didn't
want to be one of those people. It's like, oh, how's the wedding
planning going? Oh, are you going to have kids?
I just, I think I was literally talking about our podcast and
then she said that's the dream. And I said, oh, is it?
(47:09):
I didn't want to assume. And she said, yeah, that's the
dream. We neither of us want kids.
We just want to live our lives. And she also babysits sometimes.
So she's like, it's crazy because I babysit for this
family and like in order just topay me, they have to like make X
amount of money in LA just to like afford to get a babysitter.
(47:32):
And she's like, sometimes they'll ask me the day before
and I I'm busy and so I have to say no and then they just can't
go out. Oh my God.
Isn't that just a bizarre thought and feeling?
I literally like, on Friday was it we we went to a restaurant
down the street from our house and we decided to walk there and
(47:53):
decided to impulsively scooter home.
We couldn't do that. Yeah.
That's awful. Which, ironically, is the same
place they're getting married. OK, that's weird.
Isn't that weird? I go, We just walked over there
randomly the other night and you're they're getting married
(48:13):
there. So I thought it was all very
synchronous. I like that.
It's a that they have a beautiful DINK life.
I'm I, you know what? I don't know them well enough to
get invited to the wedding, but if I had to officiate last
second, I would. I, I, I'm throwing it out there,
(48:33):
I would be happy to walk over and officiate and give, you
know, a speech about being Dinks.
Yeah, you're willing to sub in at any time?
Yeah. Would you officiate a wedding?
Like would you want to? I'm actually like low key
offended and shocked that it hasn't happened yet.
I am surprised. I'm surprised.
(48:54):
The fuck? I feel like I was asked by
somebody at some point. And you said no.
Yeah, I don't want to do it. No, it's.
I really don't want to. Wait, you said no?
No, I think it was like I did. They didn't officially ask me.
It was more so like, oh, you could do it and it was like in
the middle of a different conversation.
(49:15):
So it wasn't like a formal request.
It was kind of, I think they were trying to feel me out if I
wanted to do it or not, but I don't want to do it.
I really don't. And I don't think I'll be asked
ever again. And I'm cool with that because
it's a lot of pressure. I and I give it, I hats off to
people who do it and do it well because it's like, it's not,
it's not really about you. It's somebody else's big day.
(49:38):
And that's I don't want to ruin or make somebody else's big day,
you know what I mean? I guess I thrive under the
pressure and I think, you know, I trust myself more than other
people and I do think there's a chance I would officiate my best
(50:01):
friend's wedding. Yeah, because.
She has she has a bunch of othergirlfriends that I think would
end up being bridesmaids and stuff and childhood friends that
might be maid of honor or whatever.
Can I think I think this even came up on an old episode.
I'm pretty sure that her fiance said something about me
(50:22):
officiating like in his head andthis was a year ago.
I would love I, I'm hoping that happens because I would love to
watch you do it. You think?
I kind of want, I kind of want to watch you do it, but not
having written any of it. Oh, just like off the cuff.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I feel like that would be
great. That's funny.
(50:44):
Just winging it live. Let's do it live.
We'll do it live. Fuck it, you're married.
Kiss the bride. I like, kiss her God damn it
anyway. Bud, I would have to do it
without swearing. Tough, tough.
That would be hard. That would be hard.
But you have time. You have time to figure it.
(51:04):
Out. Imagine if they let kids be
present at their wedding and a kid steps on one of my punch
lines. That kid doesn't make it to the
reception. The way I would stop down
everything. Yeah, Excuse me, what the hell
was that? Kick him out, security.
(51:27):
I thought this was a kid free wedding.
Oh no, that was my own. Never mind.
I I hope to see the day. I hope.
I hope that we can see you officiate a wedding.
I want to see you on Big Brother, and at some point we'll
get you on a dating show somehow.
Sure. Just yeah.
OK, after a pesky little divorce.
Now, we, we talked about this, we'll, we'll figure out a way to
(51:49):
fake it. OK.
All right, well, go have a good week, everyone.
Bye.
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