A Real Housewife On Fake Friends & Long Marriage

Nicole O' Neil is a Real Housewife of Sydney.

Yes, we mean the reality show. And she's also a woman dealing with a lot of what everyone else is - kids getting older, a long marriage shifting gears, friendship changing with time, a career crossroads. 

She just looks much more glamorous doing it.In this conversation we talk to Nicole about how MID’s going for someone who’s in the public eye in a very specific way. Whether the glamour is real, what it takes and what it hides. How to handle the pressure to look perfect. About friends, marriage and parenting lessons from the perspective of a newly-empty nest. And, of course, how to throw a damn party.

You can follow Nicole on Instagram and learn about her new venture BonPatch and many passions and projects.

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Mamamia's new podcast BIZ is rewriting the rules of work with no generic advice - just real strategies from women who've actually been there. Listen here.

CREDITS:

Host: Holly Wainwright

Executive Producer: Naima Brown

Senior Producer: Grace Rouvray

Producer: Tahli Blackman

Audio Producer: Jacob Round

Mamamia acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land we have recorded this podcast on, the Gadigal people of the Eora Nation. We pay our respects to their Elders past and present, and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:10):
You're listening to Amma mea podcast. Mamma Mere acknowledges the
traditional owners of land and waters that this podcast is
recorded on. If I was glamorous, I'd wear a cropped trench,
maybe in cream. That's a glamorous shade, the color for
people who don't spill from takeaway cups, or indulge small

(00:31):
sticky fingers, or sit in something dubious on a bus,
A color for people who would never eat something wrapped
in ripped, waxed paper that might ooze from its edges.
I'd wear proper heels, not kittens or blocks, and I'd
stride in them like slippers, and my bag would clash
in just the right way, gleaming a burnished little buckle,

(00:51):
quiet signal bleeping out to those in the not. If
I was glamorous, my face would be smoother and sowed.
My hair my lipstick wouldn't wear off in the middle,
but stay stubbornly around the edges like nineties lipliner. My
brows would never get that wiry, wild look, as if
they're plotting to climb up to my hairline. My legs

(01:12):
would never stubble, my toes never chip, and I'd always
be able to see a rogue chin hair to pluck
whatever glasses I had on. If I was glamorous, I'd
be hostessing every weekend, maybe even on an ad hoc
Tuesday night. I'd instinctively know whether to dress day or night,
up or down or in that mysterious middle of a

(01:35):
sweater around the shoulders or a jacket without arms. My
glasses would all match, my plates would all stack. My
kitchen wouldn't have a mystery drawer where the homeless things
are and the plastic bags rolling balls of supermarket shame.
I'd kitsushi lunches and grazing table dinners, and I'd have
brunches with billinis and bellinies and the wisdom to know

(01:56):
the difference. If I was glamorous, I'd be aging with grace,
with a nod to the icons who knew what was
what a lady never tells no knees After forty, I'd
know instinctively what age appropriate meant, and you'd never see
the outline of my bra under a just too small pop.

(02:17):
I'd drink tall, clear drinks, but never two men learn
how to say no to the cannopey tray that would
always be sailing by. If I was glamorous, I wouldn't
be me. But even now, over halfway through a life
where a cream cropped trench is not in my future
the fantasy and Jaws. Would a glamorous me be less

(02:38):
or more anxious? Sleep better, parent better, age better? Would
a social butterfly me be richer, thinner, better at yoga?
If I was glamorous, would I be ten percent happier
twenty fifty? I think I'm old enough to know that answer,
and I think the glamorous version of me in our
simulated bedazzled multi universe does two.

Speaker 2 (03:05):
Hello.

Speaker 1 (03:06):
I'm Holly Wainwright and I am mid mid life, midfamily,
mid scruff. Before we get into today's episode with our
glamorous guest, I want to ask my mid friends something.
If you like this show, if you love this show,
if you think someone else should listen to this episode
or any other episode of mid that you've liked, please
please share, give us a review, give us five stars.

(03:30):
Wherever you're listening to this. I know you hear podcast
hosts asking you that, and you must be like, oh,
such needy people. But the truth is it really helped
shows to grow, especially shows that aren't very old like MID,
just like us, Mid's not very old. And so if
you love it, or if there was an episode that
you went, oh my god, everybody needs to hear that,
jump into wherever you're listening to it, whether you're on Spotify,

(03:52):
whether you're on Apple, you're in another place entirely, and
leave a little review for us, a nice review, of course,
and leave us five stars, or share it with someone
you love.

Speaker 2 (04:03):
We would love that. Thank you.

Speaker 1 (04:04):
Let's get started. Today's episode is a party because I'm
joined by a properly glamorous woman, a self proclaimed extrovert socialite,
and someone who, if you've seen her on TV or
on your phone, you'd probably imagine has a very specific
kind of life. Nicole O'Neil is one of the Real

(04:25):
Housewives of Sydney. If you don't know what that is,
you don't watch reality television, which is an encouraged life
choice but not a badge of honor. So sit down, friend.
The Housewives series straddle the world. There are real housewives
of everywhere, from Beverly Hills to Dubai, Athens and Legos
and Melbourne of course, and Sydney. Very few of the

(04:48):
women followed on any of these shows are actually housewives,
whatever that word means in twenty twenty five, anyway, And
Nicole O'Neill fits the description in some ways but not all.
She lives in a big, beautiful house in the eastern suburbs. Tick.
She has a designer wardrobe and a lot of handbags.

Speaker 2 (05:07):
Tick.

Speaker 1 (05:08):
She's good at having people, and she knows how to
throw a brunch tick.

Speaker 2 (05:11):
Tick.

Speaker 1 (05:12):
But Nicole O'Neill has a couple of jobs. She's owned businesses,
she's raised a couple of ambitious, clever daughters, and she's
stayed married to the same man for twenty five years.
She's dealing with a lot of the same stuff. Many
of us are changing roles as the kids get older,
friendships that shift with time, how we want to age.

(05:34):
She just makes it look a bit more put together
than some of us. I wanted to speak to Nicole
to find out how mid's going for someone who's in
the public eye in a very specific way, whether the
glamour is real, what it changes and what it hides,
how to handle the pressure to look perfect. And of course,
since I'm a woman whose idea of entertaining is to

(05:55):
open a pot of humus and cut up a carrot,
how to throw a damn party. Enjoy this bubbly tangy
episode of mid with Nicole O'Neill, who doesn't mind a
straight talking life lesson, by the way, about what behind
her mask? We're all wearing one? After all, Nicole, you are,
of course a real housewife, which puts you in some

(06:17):
exalted company.

Speaker 2 (06:20):
The show.

Speaker 1 (06:23):
The franchise is about, on the surface, at least, fabulous
women living quite drama filled lives in fabulous houses and
fabulous shoes. I'd love to know at this point of
your life, which bits of that kind of glamorous life
is very much you and you love, and which bits
are a little bit more down home these days.

Speaker 3 (06:45):
Well, I'd like to think that that's the life I lead,
that's very glamorous and that I'd like to lead, but
it is quite far from the reality of what my
life has been like over the last few years, you know,
raising children and being a very involved parent I was,

(07:06):
and obviously starting a business. I was not the the
woman who had lunches all day and had time to
beautify myself. And they're not things that I enjoyed like,
there weren't things that I prioritized, and I know that
a lot of the stigmatism involved with being on a
show like Housewives is that that's the type of person
you are. And I mean, I do love a blow
dry when I'm going out for a dinner, but I

(07:28):
don't lunch all day. I cook it home every night
for my family, and I live a very glamorous life.
And I might do it in a beautiful home and
have nice to be surrounded by nice things, but my
life is very much like everybody else, a lot of
other mums who put time in with their children.

Speaker 1 (07:47):
When you were agreeing to go on the show, and
I know, obviously you've had a hiatus and now you're
back on it. Were you worried about that? You just
used the word stigma, I think, or stereotype that. Were
you worried about that or were you like, oh, I'm
happy to play off a bit that side of my
life a bit and have some fun with it.

Speaker 3 (08:03):
I mean, the show is an exaggerated version of our
everyday lives, and you aren't being followed around by a
camera twenty four to seven. You choose to share what
you want to share, and I understand there's certain elements
that we play up to, and certain stereotypes that we
play into, But overall, I want I made sure that
I stayed true to who I am. And I think

(08:25):
when you go into a show like something like Housewives,
you cannot.

Speaker 2 (08:29):
Have a skeleton in your closet.

Speaker 3 (08:31):
You cannot be worried and constantly nervous that something's going
to be revealed, because they do. They go for a
deep dive, whether it's the producers or the other girls,
or even just audience members the press, they go for
a deep dive. And if you've got skeletons in your
closet and your nervous are going to come out, this
is not the show for you. And so I was
okay doing the show because I was me and what

(08:54):
you saw was what you got. Yes, an exaggerated version,
and there're things that were taken out of context, but
generally speaking, that's what you got.

Speaker 1 (09:00):
Do you feel like it's a kind of caricature of
you in a way, you know, like it is you,
but with exaggerated Definitely a bit like Beyonce and Sasha
Fis you know what I mean. Yeah, it's an exaggerated
version of but the authentic core is there. Yes, and
that was what when I came back for the second season,
what was very important to me, you know, and I

(09:21):
had many discussions with the producers about the fact that
my priority is not lunches and dinners and leading this
glamorous life.

Speaker 2 (09:29):
My priority are my children.

Speaker 3 (09:30):
And my girls were in a very vulnerable time in
their life and they needed their mother around. And you know,
I made a very conscious decision very early on that
I was going to be a present parent, and I
wanted that to translate that it doesn't matter if you're
doing it in a you know, mansion somewhere or in
a tiny two bedroom flat somewhere else that you know,
being a present parent is what I wanted to relate.

Speaker 2 (09:53):
I wanted people to relate to with me.

Speaker 1 (09:56):
Because I guess there's a perception, and maybe this is
a bit of my English heritage coming out here, that
if you are wealthy enough that you can outsource parenting
to a point and like that. You know, there's a
stereotype in Britain, for example, that the aristocrat, the really
fancy people, they only see their children at tea time
to kiss them on the head and like see how
nicely the Nannis dressed them. And then shoe them off

(10:17):
so they can go out for dinner. It seems to
me that you and your background and heritage family is
very important, and that is not the kind of parent
you want it to be.

Speaker 3 (10:25):
No, And it's funny enough because my mother once said
to me, the richest people in the world can raise
their own children, which means you have the time to
spend with your children. You can then afford to outsource
everything else. But you've spent You spend the time, So.

Speaker 1 (10:43):
That's what it's given you. That's what it gives.

Speaker 2 (10:45):
This is it.

Speaker 3 (10:46):
You pick up the kids from school, you have dinner ready.
But yes, you can have someone to clean up. You
can have someone who makes the beds, you can have
someone who does your washing, so you can outsource all
of that.

Speaker 2 (10:55):
You can have someone who goes and does your grocery shopping.

Speaker 3 (10:58):
But you're the one bathing your kids, you're the one
putting them to bed, You're the one who's.

Speaker 2 (11:02):
There and being a present parent.

Speaker 3 (11:04):
So I think that that is it's sort of the
reverse psychology of what people think that you know, being
able to afford those things can do.

Speaker 1 (11:13):
Yeah, And in a way, that's the privilege of it
because if you're if you have to be working double
shifts or you're not there to be able to do that.
That's that's the privilege worth having, right It's the freedom
to pay yourself some time to spend with your kids.

Speaker 3 (11:25):
That's it, And it kind of makes sense when you
think about it.

Speaker 1 (11:28):
You're right, it's and it's choice. At the end of
the day, it's been able to be the kind of
parent you want to be, of course.

Speaker 3 (11:32):
But you know, it's funny because I I've seen a
lot of different types of parenting over the years.

Speaker 2 (11:39):
I was a very young mum. I was a mum
at twenty.

Speaker 3 (11:41):
Five, and so I grew up with you know, a
lot of women who are older than me, and you know,
I looked up to a lot of different women, my
mum being one of them. And the funny thing is
that now I've lost my trade of thought.

Speaker 2 (11:58):
That's what happens when you hit mid loss.

Speaker 1 (12:01):
Oh yeah, I.

Speaker 2 (12:02):
Know about that.

Speaker 1 (12:03):
That's why we need clar patches.

Speaker 2 (12:07):
Yet I've complained what you were saying, You concentrate.

Speaker 1 (12:11):
You were saying a young mom. You've seen how lot
of people are doing it.

Speaker 3 (12:17):
So I think that the idea is that if you're
whether you work or.

Speaker 2 (12:22):
Not work, Like it's about being a present parent.

Speaker 3 (12:25):
Like I have friends who work full time, but they
are there for their children more than friends of mine
who don't work and who spend so much time doing
everything else and aren't there for their kids.

Speaker 1 (12:36):
Tell me a bit. So being a young parent is
really interesting because where you are now, and you're still
very young, of course, but you're now at the stage
where they are off at UNI and they are overseas
in fact doing that. But it's a very common situation
for a lot of listeners to men who are going, Okay,
my role is suddenly shifted now. They might have had
women on the show who, you know, for lots of

(12:58):
reasons to couldn't have children till much later, so they
were often maybe struggling with a lot of the things
middle I throw at you at the same time as
going through the empty nest. How are you finding this shift?

Speaker 3 (13:09):
Well, it's funny because I like almost grew up with
my children.

Speaker 1 (13:14):
Did you always want to be a young mom?

Speaker 3 (13:16):
No, it's funny because growing up I never wanted to
be a mom. It's not that I didn't want to
be a mum, but it was not something I dreamt of.

Speaker 1 (13:23):
It wasn't you weren't the one who was saying I'm
going to get back.

Speaker 3 (13:26):
Oh No, like my sister who's one year younger, she
dreamt of, like getting married and having a family.

Speaker 2 (13:31):
That was never something that I never dreamed of. Being
a bride.

Speaker 3 (13:33):
Adam and I got married in Vegas. It wasn't a
thing that I had. I knew it was going to happen,
and it wasn't something I didn't want, but it wasn't
something that I dreamt of. I wanted a career. I
wanted to be a business woman. I wanted to travel
the world and live this glamorous life. And it's funny
because I only the other days found a book that
I wrote when I was at school, and in the
back I wrote, you know I was in year six,

(13:54):
and it wrote I wrote about the author and I
talked about you know, you know who I was, And
it says, and when Nicole grows up, she would like
to pursue a career in entertainment, and if not, she'd
like to be a business woman. Oh. And I thought,
it's funny what you manifest, because it is that's the
path that I sort of followed, But you know, motherhood
came in between that, and so, as I said, I

(14:15):
grew up with my children. So I've spent these last
twelve months really getting to know who I am and
the path I am. And I absolutely adore my children,
and I've had the most incredible time raising them, and
I know that that role is not finished yet.

Speaker 2 (14:28):
But I've now looked inward, and you know, I'm.

Speaker 3 (14:32):
Spending a lot of time in the US at the moment,
and I'm walking streets and going to museums and you know,
just spending a lot of time thinking about what the
next forty years are going to look like, Well, the
next fifty years are going to look like.

Speaker 2 (14:42):
Where am I going to live? What am I going
to do with myself? What makes me happy?

Speaker 3 (14:47):
Because so much of my happiness came from being around
my family. But you can't rely on your family. You
can't put that responsibility on them. It's not fair that
I put that on my children, or even on my husband.
So I need to now discover what makes me happy
and what I look forward to.

Speaker 1 (15:03):
And how are you going about that?

Speaker 3 (15:05):
Right?

Speaker 1 (15:05):
How do you after a long time of going, well,
here's my you know, you obviously have other interests and
other things going on, But you're like Number one is
I'm around for the kids, and there's a certain amount
of sadness I get. I hear my kids aren't they
yet because I did have my kids quite late, so
they're quite still quite young. But lots of people say
to me, it's like a really joyful sadness, because you're

(15:28):
a bit sad that obviously you're not seeing them every
day and they're not under your roof anymore. But the
joy of seeing them like fly off into the world
is quite indescribable. Did you feel that sadness? And when
you ask yourself, what do I want now? How are
you finding the answers to that?

Speaker 3 (15:45):
You know, when I dropped, I wasn't even able to
take in a while off to university.

Speaker 2 (15:50):
So my mother and my sister took her.

Speaker 3 (15:52):
And I'll never forget the night before she left, because
Neve was doing her HSC or It was in that
HC year, So I'll never forget that night before she
left the house, and even her slept in the same room,
and it was this dark cloud over the house because
we knew we were saying goodbye to her. The next morning,
and then at five am my mum came past. They
close to the girls, very close, and my mom came
past at five am to say to pick her up.

(16:13):
My mum and my sister and I remember saying goodbye
to her and just balling, and I knew it was,
I mean, beginning of the end of my role of
being a parent. And I was the type of parent
that I wouldn't even let my children sleep over, right,
so protective. They have never slept in any anywhere, not
a single person's house, like except my mum and my

(16:37):
mother in law's house. So for me then to send
her to the other side of the world was a
massive thing.

Speaker 1 (16:42):
How did you without obviously wanting to tread on her
privacy and her privacy, but how did you make the
decision that that's where she was going to go.

Speaker 3 (16:51):
Well, it was always something that the girls wanted to pursue,
both of them, and.

Speaker 1 (16:57):
They smart and ambitious girls. By the sounds, they're very smart,
They're very ambitious, and they worked very hard.

Speaker 3 (17:01):
Both are in Ivy League universities on fencing scholarship. Very
proud of them. So they've done extremely well. And I'm
and I've always been supportive of them, and I knew
it was time. You know, at fourteen or fifteen, they're
not ready to sleep at someone's house. I don't know
who's around, I don't know, they don't know how they're
going to deal with the situation. But by eighteen, they're armed,

(17:23):
they know, they they know what's right, what's wrong, what
feels right, what feels wrong. And so I felt like
as a parent, like that was that was time to
let go, because also, you know, the world has changed
so much that even it was twenty years ago, there's
face time.

Speaker 1 (17:37):
I can just say, you're talking to them all the time, all.

Speaker 3 (17:39):
The time, but I also follow where they are all
the time that God forbid that you know not I
don't track them, but if something happens, I know where
they are, and.

Speaker 2 (17:49):
And we have that open relationship.

Speaker 3 (17:50):
But we got to that point, and I think that
that's really important as a parent to realize when you
get to that point. And I had been preparing not
only myself but also the girls for that point. They
know when to call me, they know when you know,
they know that nothing will shock me, that nothing is
so bad that we can't solve it. That if doesn't
feel right walk away. We've had the drug talk, We've

(18:13):
had all the talks that you know, and I felt
like that she was ready, and so I did. I
felt like my bird was leaving the nest, and that
was very difficult. But now to see her flourish and
love her life and do so well, I'm proud.

Speaker 1 (18:31):
After this short break. Nicole O'Neill has been married to
her husband Adam for over two decades. So what does
she know about a happy marriage. You were saying that
you and Adam got married in Vegas when you were
quite young. Yes, so you've been married a long time.

Speaker 2 (18:48):
Twenty five years this year.

Speaker 1 (18:50):
Very that's you know, again stereotypes, right, but that's not
necessarily typical for the you know, the kind of world
that I again like imagine. Tell me a little bit
about what makes your.

Speaker 3 (19:02):
No, not twenty five years twenty. We got married in
two thousand and two, so twenty three.

Speaker 1 (19:07):
Years still very good.

Speaker 2 (19:11):
We were probably together. I was already planning the twenty.

Speaker 1 (19:16):
I've just got brought some time back. Tell me a
bit about what makes your marriage work.

Speaker 3 (19:21):
I married my best friend, and I think that that
is very I was never the girl who was a
serial data I always you know, I only had one
boyfriend before, and I knew very early on what I
wanted in a partner because I could see, you know,
what my parents had, and I wanted to marry my

(19:43):
best friend.

Speaker 2 (19:43):
I wanted to marry.

Speaker 3 (19:44):
Someone who shared similar interest to me, but who lets
me be me.

Speaker 2 (19:49):
And for me, that was very important, and that.

Speaker 1 (19:51):
You didn't want one of those men who finds a
beautiful girl and puts her in a cage.

Speaker 3 (19:56):
And I am so lucky that that's who I got.
I got a life partner who challenges me, but yet
who values me. You know, we might have different opinions
on withrivial matters, but the big stuff, you know, we
will stand together with. And I think that that's really important.

(20:16):
And I think these days too many girls settle. I
think there's so much to do with getting married and
finding this partner, and you know, girls feel like time's
going to run out, but you end up paying for
a bad partner later, Like, yes, you might get the
big wedding and you might have this amazing marriage for

(20:39):
the first few years, but the true person comes out
in the end, and I think, you know, you end
up paying for it later.

Speaker 2 (20:45):
It's the same. Like I was saying to someone the
other day about when.

Speaker 3 (20:48):
You raise your kids, if you don't discipline them when
they're younger, you'll get it later. You'll have problems later.
So you're going to get it somewhere along the line.
It's just, you know, you keep pushing it away and
not facing.

Speaker 2 (20:58):
What the reality is. You're going to have to deal
with it at some point.

Speaker 1 (21:02):
Is it fun for you and Adam to be at
this point now where you're like, as you're saying, the
kids are often because that's also a pivotabal point for
a relationship because you're like, we're not so much mom
and dad now we're back to being Nicole and Adam.

Speaker 3 (21:16):
It's funny because on Saturday night we were driving, so
we've been away and we got back and Adam and
I were driving and I said it turned around and
I said to him, you know, it's just you and
I for the next forty fifty years. And he looked
at me and he goes and isn't that wonderful?

Speaker 1 (21:31):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (21:31):
And I thought, you know what, Yep, it is wonderful.

Speaker 3 (21:34):
And I've got we're in a stage now where you know,
like the other day he comes home and I'm like,
let's go to the beach for a swim at six o'clock.
Because we don't have to feed anyone dinner, we don't
have to be any at a class meeting, we have
no responsibilities.

Speaker 2 (21:48):
So you know, we're going back to when we were
dating and it's fun.

Speaker 3 (21:52):
Then you know we're meeting each other again on a
different level.

Speaker 1 (21:56):
Yeah, I think that's the dream, right, because you don't
want to be in that situation and looking at them
and going, oh, we don't have anything to talk about.
Like now that necessarily that when we were first dating
and that excitement of getting to know you has gone.
What have we got? You've obviously got something very solid.

Speaker 2 (22:14):
I think.

Speaker 3 (22:15):
I think that my marriage, or any marriage, takes a
lot of work, and I think it like you put
in with your children, you need to put it in
in your relationship. And of course there's ups and downs,
and of course there's times when you can't stand each
other because you know if something they've done or said
or just not done or said, but you know you can't.

(22:35):
It's so easy these days to walk away. And that's
what worries me about this next generation that's coming up now,
is that we live in such a quick, disposable world,
Like you know, you want to watch a movie you
downloaded on TV straight away. I mean I from the
generation that went to the video store and had to
wret the video and then return it on the Sunday
night and then make sure that it's there before eight pm,

(22:59):
where you get charged late fees or you know, takeaway
was something that was reserved for a very special occasion.
You just don't get takeaway from a local restaurant unless
you know, it's a big.

Speaker 2 (23:10):
Excuse to have.

Speaker 3 (23:11):
You know, anything that they want now they get instantly,
and so is even fashion and clothes. And I feel
like the hustle of wanting something and waiting for something
is gone, and you know, and that's where relationships come
into it, because they've used that same mentality across all
the lifestyle.

Speaker 1 (23:29):
Yeah, you can order yourself up a boyfriend or there
you're going on the phone and that's it. But you
know how you said, relationships take work, and I very
much agree. I think they do. But sometimes I think
it's like, what does that look like? Does that mean
you know that you when you have a bad day
or a bad month, or I think when you've been
together for more than twenty years. I have two with

(23:50):
my partner. There can be a bad year sometimes and
it's you think the work is holding on, the work
is trying to figure out like choosing to stay together.
Is that what you think the work is.

Speaker 3 (24:02):
Yeah, I think the choices that the grass is not
always green.

Speaker 2 (24:08):
And I think that a lot of people.

Speaker 3 (24:11):
Crave that passion that they you know, that that you know,
that butterfly new stomach feeling that you get when you're
dating someone and you're not sure if he's going to call.
And I mean I remember showering with the phone in
the you know, in the in the bathroom in case
the phone rang, just in case, or you know, sleeping
with it on just in case you know, there was
a call in the middle of the night because you know,
you know, he wanted to say hi, and and you know,

(24:34):
people crave that high. But that's also this instant gratification
feeling that people want. But you know, that's not what
a marriage is, and people forget that a marriage is
also not a wedding. That's a first mistake. Marriage is
not a wedding.

Speaker 1 (24:48):
It's like being a parent isn't a baby. You know
what I mean, and all the.

Speaker 3 (24:52):
Prams and all, you know, whenever someone falls pregnant and
then all of a sudden, now they're so excited about
doing the nursery's.

Speaker 1 (24:58):
That's just that, that's like this, I was about to
hit you.

Speaker 3 (25:04):
Okay, then yes, go for that beautiful pram and that
beautiful cot.

Speaker 1 (25:08):
But yeah, it's what comes up.

Speaker 3 (25:09):
This, it's what comes after. And it's also making sure
that you marry someone that you're not settling. But you know,
we're lucky that we live in a society now where
it's okay to live together before you get married. It's
almost try before you buy, but just make sure that
you don't try out for too long. Yeah, for sure,
but try out before you buy it. Or also if

(25:30):
you don't have to get married anymore. You know, it's
society's views on relationship has completely changed.

Speaker 2 (25:37):
Absolutely.

Speaker 1 (25:38):
I'm sure you've got plenty of girlfriends who are similar
to you, who are divorced or separated, having been the
person who's in the happy, long marriage that they come
to you for advice, And do you ever look at
them with a little bit of like, oh, it looks
like fun, or do you always look at them and go, oh,
that looks terrified.

Speaker 2 (25:54):
Oh, I love to live through their experiences.

Speaker 3 (25:58):
But you know, it's funny because I have some girlfriends
who've been in these twenty year marriages and then all
of a sudden they're single. And it's very funny how
different women take it very differently, and some are just
out straight away, some are desperate to find someone else
straight away.

Speaker 2 (26:12):
I'm like, enjoy this time.

Speaker 3 (26:14):
Take the most out of being single, and you know,
spend time just sitting home and watching a Netflix movie
and you know, having the house to yourself, or you know,
go out with your girlfriends, go out, spend time with
your children, like a lot of them have young kids.
So I find it very I find it, you know,
I find it awkward that you know that some of
them are just so keen to get out there again

(26:37):
so quickly. But I suppose I can't talk because that's
not my situation exactly. So I don't know, And that's
why I'm not the person to give advice.

Speaker 1 (26:46):
You don't know if you would be at home in
your slippers, or if you'd be out there on a
different day.

Speaker 2 (26:50):
Everyone on the table at a bar ways exhaust I know.

Speaker 3 (26:55):
I look at my friends who are single now, and
it does break my heart because I think about like
being out there and put having to put yourself out
there after so many years.

Speaker 2 (27:04):
It's not easy.

Speaker 3 (27:06):
And then you've got this whole younger generation coming through
of you know, young girls who are you know, fishing
in the same pond as you, And it's not easy.

Speaker 1 (27:15):
Speaking of that, you must feel a certain amount of
pressure being on TV and being a relatively public person
to always look amazing, and you do. You do look amazing,
no question. And I know that you have been a model,
and you've been you know, so your appearance has obviously
always been important to you to a point. Do you
struggle with aging in terms of what what you look

(27:38):
like or do you think you look better?

Speaker 2 (27:41):
You know.

Speaker 3 (27:41):
It's funny because I only recently had this discussion with
a friend of mine that, you know, for the first
time in my life when I'm with my daughters, like,
you know, we were in New York the other day
and we were walking down the street and I walked
and I walked past someone and then I saw him
turn and I was like, he wasn't turning for me,
he was.

Speaker 2 (28:00):
Turning for them, you know, So and you know what
good on them.

Speaker 3 (28:05):
Let like, and I'm happy for my daughters to it's
their time to shine. And they're both absolutely beautiful, and
it's it's you know, the spotlight has moved to them.

Speaker 1 (28:15):
I think you're still shining. Oh, I mean, I'm not
just saying that to suck up, but I mean I think, like,
you know, you look you look amazing by any measure.

Speaker 2 (28:25):
Thank you.

Speaker 1 (28:27):
It must be, but there must be a bit of pressure.
I often wonder if for people who are very beautiful
or like and maybe it was an important part of
your youth, maybe it wasn't you tell me that? Is
that make it harder or easier to to see yourself change?

Speaker 3 (28:42):
You know, it's funny because you know, the way I
look was never it was not never an issue or
a point of discussion growing up. I'm one of four.
I have one sister and then two brothers. My father
is Lebonese, my mother is Swedish, so we.

Speaker 2 (28:56):
All look quite different.

Speaker 3 (28:57):
And so the way I looked was like growing up
was you know, my appearance was never a point of discussion.
It was never did I feel more beautiful than anyone else?
No was I told that I was more beautiful than
anyone else. No, it was never. My ego is never
inflated by the way I looked. My parents didn't put
any importance on that, and the people around me didn't.

Speaker 2 (29:18):
But I grew up without the generation of Instagram.

Speaker 3 (29:20):
I grew up without the way you look matters. It
was My grandmother was a huge inspiration, my mother's mother.
She was very tall, she was one hundred and eighty
scent meters tall, and she was very elegant.

Speaker 2 (29:33):
Her whole life.

Speaker 3 (29:34):
And I would go and stay with her for the weekends,
and she had the most incredible makeup box, and she
had a beautiful makeup mirror on her desk, and every
morning when she woke up, before anything else, she'd brush
her teeth and she'd always lather on hot pink lipstick
at any age and mascara like she just, you know,
looked impeccable. She just took time out in her appearance.
And I think I learned a lot from that that,

(29:57):
you know, you have to invest in yourself. So even
though it was never, it was never talked about, it was,
you know, how you look is so important, and I
think it correlates to how you feel, and it's not
about having an ego or anything like that, because I'm
the last person to go and have a manicure or
have my hair done. They're things that I actually don't

(30:18):
enjoy doing because I can't sit still and I don't
have time for it. It's funny because I've been away
for six months and I came back and I went
for a manicure and a pedicure, you know, down to
Joe Bailey and I said to my you know, move
out my manicures. I was like, you know, this is
my first better cure in six months.

Speaker 2 (30:33):
She's like what.

Speaker 3 (30:34):
I'm like, you know, I don't like sitting It's been
in winter and I just don't like sitting there and
having my feet done. So I was never primmed and primed.
I wasn't that girl. I love makeup and I'll never
leave the house without makeup on.

Speaker 2 (30:46):
But that's just me. From when I was young, it.

Speaker 1 (30:49):
Was also if you enjoy it, you're allowed to enjoy it.
I think that as we get older, maybe there's a
bit of judgment about whether you there's vanity, yes, but
there's also judgment about like do you care, do you
care too much? Do you not care at all? Do
you like and I also think that we can't win.
We're all different, right, So if you've always got a
lot of pleasure from you know, from grooming. Such an

(31:12):
old fashioned word, but do you know what I mean,
I know, putting together? Then why should you stop doing
that because you're older and maybe you know or whatever.
But I do feel like there's a lot of pressure
now because there are so many things available to us
that mean that we can slow things down and invertedrus
like making those decisions about what to do what not
to do. Especially if you're in a world where people

(31:32):
are looking at you, it must be do you feel
that pressure when you're making those choices.

Speaker 3 (31:37):
I don't. I don't listen to the noise, and I've
never been one to feel pressure.

Speaker 2 (31:42):
I tried to live a very healthy lifestyle.

Speaker 3 (31:45):
I truly believe what you put in now shows out
in twenty years time. I look at friends of mine
who let lead big lives in their twenties and it's
coming out now.

Speaker 2 (31:56):
And that's what I try to say to my girls.

Speaker 3 (31:58):
It's, you know, looking after yourself as an investment in
your future, because again, it's going to catch.

Speaker 2 (32:03):
Up with you at one point in your life. How
I'm going to age. I haven't decided yet.

Speaker 3 (32:07):
My mother, my grandmother both have aged very gracefully. They
look amazing. They look their age. You know, they look fantastic.
You know, they're very they're Swedish. It's that, you know,
it's in their blood that you know, I mean they've
got a saunas and that they live a very natural
life and it's amazing. My mum looks amazing and she
hates when people you know, you know she you know,

(32:31):
we talk about like at seventy you want to look
you know, you do look like a seventy year old.
You can't at seventy try to look like a fifty
year old. It's just not going to work.

Speaker 2 (32:41):
Somewhere along the lines, it's going to hang down. You
can lift and lift and lift and lift, but somewhere
along that it's coming out. It's coming out. It's like space,
exactly like the space.

Speaker 1 (32:50):
At some point that it's coming out. That's the way
it works. Yeah, do you when you're doing Housewives? I
need to ask you this is it full glam squad?
Do you do for every session? Do you do get
hair and makeup and all the good because you all
your women look absolutely amazing.

Speaker 3 (33:05):
So they give us hair and makeup when we do
our master interviews and when we have the big events,
but when we do smaller coffee catch ups and chats,
we do our own hair and makeup. I mean, I'm
a Joe Bailey go through and through, so a blow
dry Joe Bailey because for me, I can't do my
own hair like I can do my own makeup, but
hair is like just yeah, that's my little luxury. And

(33:26):
so I will always go and have a blow dry
and then I'll do my own makeup. And I've done
it so much myself, and no one knows my face
like I know my own face, and so I can
get it done very quickly and you know, off I go.

Speaker 2 (33:38):
But there is a lot of investment of.

Speaker 3 (33:40):
Time into your hair and your nails and your spray
to hands and all that before you actually get on cameras.

Speaker 2 (33:46):
So people go, yeah, you'd be your own filming two.

Speaker 3 (33:48):
Hours on a Monday. You're like those two film those
to film those.

Speaker 1 (33:52):
Two hours to eight hours, a lot of prep, a
lot of prep. But you know what, I think there's
probably a world where whether you're on the Real Housewives
or not, there feels like this standard that we have
to live up to that maybe is always being lifted
at the moment. You know that you do have to
make sure that you've you've always got your nails done,
you've always got the town, whatever it is, even if

(34:12):
you're not on TV, and sometimes that can be.

Speaker 2 (34:15):
The pressure is awful. The pressure I see it on
my girls.

Speaker 3 (34:19):
I see when so I desperately tried to keep my
children off social media for a very long time, and
you know, and I'm very grateful that I managed to
do that, and I think that sport for their age
played a huge role. But I can see what they're
constantly being bombarded with because I can see what I'm
constantly being bombarded with. And you know, if you're an

(34:40):
impressionable teenager or you know, twenty something, and you have
to look a certain way, or you feel that you
have to look a certain way because society deems that
to be the.

Speaker 2 (34:49):
Look, that's awful. I mean, I look.

Speaker 3 (34:53):
At you know, I go into some of these makeup
stores and they're full of tweens and I think, oh,
my goodness, you should be running outside and I know,
hitting a ball and you know.

Speaker 2 (35:04):
Having picnics with your friends.

Speaker 1 (35:05):
You shouldn't know what ratinal is.

Speaker 3 (35:07):
No, you shouldn't know what any of this is. So
and it's quite interesting to see. And I worry about
what the next generation after the next.

Speaker 2 (35:15):
Is going to look like.

Speaker 1 (35:16):
I know it seems to again the bar seems to
be shifting all the time.

Speaker 3 (35:20):
And the pressure that these girls put on themselves, but
also the pressure that what the expectations that these boys
who are dating them, because they're constantly seeing these photos
of airbrushed girls and they're thinking that that's you know,
that's what the bar is, and that's you know, yeah,
it's a worry now.

Speaker 2 (35:37):
It is a worry.

Speaker 1 (35:38):
It really is. When we come back, Nicole talks friendships,
socializing and throwing great parties in it what makes a
great parties because some people like me, actually I'm very
intimidated by hosting, very intimidated by hosting. I like going
to other people's parties, but I get very intimidated. What's

(36:01):
the secret to hosting a really great.

Speaker 3 (36:04):
I think the secret is to be a relaxed hostess.
And I think a lot of the time guests look
at the host tests the host and the host tests
and if they're stressed for whatever reason, the whole energy
of the party is stressed, and so you know, by
the time your party starts, there's nothing you can do
about whatever's happening in the background. What's the worst that

(36:26):
can happen? You need more ice, you order it. You
need more alcohol, you order it. If you can't cook,
that's okay. Style beautiful food that you've brought in on platters.
There's so many different ways now that you can bring
a party together. I mean, I love hosting brunches, and
brunches is such an easy way to host people over
without having to actually physically get in the kitchen and cook.

Speaker 2 (36:49):
And there's so much you can do the night before.

Speaker 1 (36:51):
What do you serve it? If I came around to
your house for brunch? What would I get?

Speaker 3 (36:55):
Oh, you'd get a beautiful for tata that I've probably
cooked the night before. You'd get definitely get Bloody Mary's
favorite spicy one too. You could get a mimosa if
we can actually find which one has a nectar juice.

Speaker 1 (37:10):
It's the moment I don't know.

Speaker 2 (37:14):
The juice.

Speaker 1 (37:14):
Yeah, you.

Speaker 2 (37:16):
Get Billini's.

Speaker 3 (37:17):
You'd probably get ham and cheese croissants perfect, Yeah, a big,
big bowl of yogurt.

Speaker 2 (37:22):
With some granola and fresh fruit.

Speaker 3 (37:25):
And then if you're still there at two in the afternoon,
which chances out you would be because we'd be sitting
and talking, we'll order pizzas.

Speaker 1 (37:32):
That sounds doable. Yeah, it's an easy Do you still
love throwing parties? You love it?

Speaker 2 (37:37):
I love, as I said, I love being around people.
I love entertaining, but I love cooking. Also.

Speaker 3 (37:42):
I love seeing the satisfaction that people get from eating
and what it does and how it brings people together.

Speaker 1 (37:49):
Many women who, especially when our kids begin to leave,
we really can look around and go. My female friends
get me through. Do you have a tribe who are
very tight with you? And what do you think is
the secret to holding on? Told friends I have. I
have a vast ray of friends.

Speaker 3 (38:08):
I have some old school friends, so there were school
friends when I was at school. We've known each other
for thirty plus years. And then I've got friends that
I met through like my children, so they're the girls'
school friends. And then I have other friends who are
collections of you know, odd bods of friends who have
come together. So I'm very lucky that I have different

(38:29):
networks of friends. But you know, as I grow older,
I realize more and more that I want to be
around women who lift me out, who have different opinions,
because I want people to challenge me and my ideas
and my thoughts, because I want to learn and grow
from my friends. Loyalty for me is the most important thing,
and you know I was already saying it to someone

(38:51):
the other day.

Speaker 2 (38:52):
I want to be in.

Speaker 3 (38:53):
I want to be I want to be around people
who talk about me and defend me in rooms I'm
not in.

Speaker 1 (39:01):
What do you say to people who might say that
the Housewives, not just the Sydney version, but all of
them can paint female friendship in quite a bad liael
like at times.

Speaker 2 (39:10):
It's very true, it does.

Speaker 3 (39:12):
I think that a lot of the time people need
to remember that it's an a show that was made
for entertainment. You know, there are some scenes in this
season with Chrissy and I, but also they love to
sensationalize and you get five lines out of fifty, so
you'll get the five Sourcius lines.

Speaker 2 (39:30):
But also I want friendships that are raw.

Speaker 3 (39:32):
I want to be able to tell my friend whether
they've disappointed me or not, and then to talk to
me back again, and be able to discuss things. You know,
I have friends who have said things to in the
past or confronted them about an issue, and then we
don't no longer talk.

Speaker 1 (39:48):
Yeah, it's yeah, you want to. It seems to me
that you are You're probably a talker rather than a simmer.

Speaker 3 (39:55):
I am a talker straight away, but I like to
get it off my chair and.

Speaker 2 (39:59):
Then I like to move on, then move on and
move on, and then I'm okay with it. But you know, unfortunately,
sometimes they're.

Speaker 3 (40:04):
Not make for an awkward relationship.

Speaker 1 (40:10):
There's a stereotype that as we get a bit older.
And again, I know that you're not you know, you're
certainly by no means old. Everybody wants the couch and slippers,
but you, I'm sure you're not like that. You're like
a social life, right.

Speaker 3 (40:23):
It's funny because I'm an extrovert and my husband is
an introvert, so we often meet in the middle. But
if I have to travel for work for two weeks,
Adam is quite content to be at home and you know,
just potter at home, you know, with the dogs, not
having crazy social life. If Adam is gone for two
weeks and I'm home, I'll be out twenty four seven.

Speaker 2 (40:46):
Because I get my energy for other people, and.

Speaker 1 (40:49):
So I ever exhaust you, Like, do you ever get
exhausted from socializing in that way? Or is it really
your happy place?

Speaker 2 (40:55):
No, it's my happy place.

Speaker 3 (40:56):
Like doing something like this, I love, like sitting here
and chatting with you. I get energy and like, I
want to go out now after this because I'm so
energized and so ready to go, because I get my
energy from people. And you know, if you're not that
type of person, people struggle with that. Like I'll even
ring a friend while I'm walking through woo Wards or

(41:17):
you know, and say, hey, you're around, I'm at wo Wards.

Speaker 2 (41:20):
You want to come and walk with the oars with me?
Because I love a chat.

Speaker 3 (41:24):
I'll be in the car, like I'm always on the
phone when I'm in the car because I'll have a chat,
whether it be for work or with you know someone,
And you know, it's just I get my energy from
other people.

Speaker 2 (41:34):
And I think that. You know, that's where Adam and
I grade is because we do meet in the middle.

Speaker 1 (41:38):
You think opposites, we think opposite helps.

Speaker 2 (41:40):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (41:41):
Yeah, Like I'm coming here now, and I said to him, well,
why don't we meet for dinner after and he's like,
but you would have been out all down, Like.

Speaker 2 (41:47):
Yeah, but I would have been out all down. Yeah,
he goes, I'll be exhausted by then I'll be.

Speaker 1 (41:52):
Like, oh, I want I can talk for both of us.
That's interesting, you know how you're saying that you're at
because the girls have left and all those things, that
you're at a kind of phase in your life where
you're trying to listen to what do I want to
do next? Do you when you're you're a person who
likes to have lots of input, lots of conversations, lots
lots of chats, how do you find that space to

(42:12):
like tune in and go what do I want next?

Speaker 3 (42:16):
That's what I'm struggling with. And it's about cutting out
a lot of the noise. And I'm in a stage
where a lot of my friends aren't.

Speaker 1 (42:23):
And so back to you being a young mum.

Speaker 2 (42:26):
See yeah, and so I.

Speaker 3 (42:29):
Don't know and I need to now rEFInd my sense
of purpose and I think that that but it's okay
if I don't have the answer straight away, it is
and I'm.

Speaker 2 (42:41):
Okay with that too.

Speaker 3 (42:42):
And so I'm floating at the moment, I'm floating, and
you know, the show's been a great experience. Launching bonb
Patch has been amazing, and so at the moment I'm floating.

Speaker 2 (42:55):
I'm just I'm throwing it out to the universe, and universe,
if you're listening, what.

Speaker 1 (43:02):
Do you think, because obviously you know that's that's busy.

Speaker 3 (43:05):
You know, you've got business, I've got bomb Patch, and
then I I work with the family. Yeah right, and
you and obviously are on housewives, so that's kind of
like two jobs at least at the moment.

Speaker 1 (43:16):
Yeah, you obviously have quite a big engine. Though for business,
this is it.

Speaker 2 (43:19):
I need to go to bed exhausted.

Speaker 3 (43:22):
When my head hits that pillow at night, I need
to know that I have squeezed every single.

Speaker 2 (43:28):
Drop out of the day.

Speaker 1 (43:30):
That's interesting, and I'm a night out.

Speaker 3 (43:32):
So like I'll get into bed at ten and eleven
and sit on my phone and answer everyone's text messages
because I would have been going the whole day and
that's the first time that I actually stop and go, Okay,
I'm just gonnasw You ever hit the.

Speaker 1 (43:43):
Wall or do you You know some people who are
very driven by busyness. Sometimes they'll just collapse and have
to go to bed for a week.

Speaker 3 (43:51):
I love a Sunday morning line.

Speaker 2 (43:54):
I love not having any commitments.

Speaker 3 (43:56):
And I remember when the girls were little and people
used to have birthday parties at nine a m Or
a Sunday morning, and I'm like, who has a birthday
party at nine o'clock in the morning on a Sunday?

Speaker 2 (44:05):
Who are they give us a day?

Speaker 1 (44:06):
Give us a day when we don't have to do that.

Speaker 2 (44:09):
I very much valued that day.

Speaker 3 (44:12):
So I love a Sunday morning, Like, don't ask me
to do anything on a Sunday morning, because I also
do want to feel the pressure that I have to
get up to you know, if someone says, oh, we'll
do something if you wake up, then I know I'm
going to cool my head. I'm not going to sleep well.
I'm going to have to wake up. So Sunday morning
is my time and I value that. And I love
to go for a walk after when I'm up, and

(44:33):
I love to have breakfast in a cafe and really like,
I had the most beautiful day yesterday, and that's that's
for me. What feeds my soul to recharge?

Speaker 1 (44:44):
Do you have ambitions, so obviously you've got a business
with Bond Patch. When you say you're throwing out to
the universe, do you have bigger business ambitions to think
or do you think it's more about travel or like
what do you when? What do you think you these
next twenty years are going to be?

Speaker 3 (44:58):
Like It's funny because that's what I've been thinking about
for so long. And I honestly believe in manifesting.

Speaker 1 (45:06):
Do you oh at work?

Speaker 2 (45:08):
Oh life up to town point?

Speaker 1 (45:10):
Tell me about it?

Speaker 3 (45:11):
I have up until this point is what I've manifested.
Like I am spending time in New York now I am.
These were all things that were I've always talked about.
I've always wanted and I've always visualized. And it's not
that I sat down and wrote a list. It was
ingrained in my in my head. I mean even as
I said when I was, you know, in year six,

(45:33):
and I wrote about what I wanted from my life
was to be in entertainment and in business, and you know,
I've just these is what I've manifested. I wanted my
children to go and study in the US. I wanted,
you know, I wanted these opportunities in my life. I
wanted to marry my best friend, like I have manifested
all of.

Speaker 2 (45:49):
This and I honestly believe it. And I also do believe.

Speaker 3 (45:52):
That I've got guardian angels up there, whether it's my
dad or my grandfather, who are watching and helping me,
because my good luck up until this point.

Speaker 2 (46:03):
Cannot be just good luck. It needs to be a
high power who's helping me put it together.

Speaker 1 (46:09):
When you say that, it always makes me want to
touch wood. I know.

Speaker 2 (46:13):
I'm like, that's how I feel.

Speaker 3 (46:14):
That that's because but I'm grateful for the opportunities that
I've been given and and you know that's it's very
important to stop and honor, you know, the greater good,
and honor the universe. And so I know that it
hasn't disappointed me up until this point, and everything had
us for a reason.

Speaker 1 (46:32):
Yeah, you trust the universe is going to present the
next chapter.

Speaker 3 (46:36):
It's not even that I need to decide what I want.
But at the moment, I don't know. I'm just like
hoping that things come that I can then make a decision.

Speaker 1 (46:47):
Are you wedded to Sydney?

Speaker 3 (46:51):
I am very international. I have a Swedish passport because
of my mother.

Speaker 1 (46:56):
You did you ever grade there to Australia when you
were young. Yes, with your with your parents, so we
moved here.

Speaker 2 (47:01):
I was born in Dubai and we moved here when
I was five.

Speaker 1 (47:05):
Do you feel Australian in that way? Do you feel
like if you went to like, do you think you
will always come back to Sydney?

Speaker 2 (47:11):
I am.

Speaker 3 (47:12):
I feel very Lebanese Swedish right, And both my parents,
particularly my mother, made sure that we grew up with
a lot of those traditions because you know, my parents
believe that that's what kept family together and it's true,
and so I have I have a lot of the
traditions from both the cultures. So you know, I speak
the languages. I'm very connected to both. I don't feel

(47:34):
one over the other.

Speaker 1 (47:36):
When it sound like very different cultures, they really different culture,
completely opposite. Were your parents really different?

Speaker 3 (47:43):
Yeah, Like my mother though, embraced that Lebanese warmth. Like
she lived twelve years in Dubai and my mother was
an only child growing up, and so if for her
family was everything.

Speaker 1 (47:57):
Yeah, it was. So she didn't have that and she
saw that and the warm, big Lebanese.

Speaker 3 (48:01):
Family, and so she wanted that for her family. And
you know, my mum succeeded. Like she always said, she
wanted a full dinner table. My mum cooked every night
for twelve people because somebody always had a friend over,
you know, or three or four friends over, and there
was always food and there still is to this day.

Speaker 2 (48:18):
Always feit in my mom's house, like my brothers will
ring and Mum and be like, yeah, sure, I've got
dinner on the table, Come whenever you want.

Speaker 3 (48:24):
And so we are a very close knit family. And
I think that that very much shaped who I became
and what my path was because I had the confidence
to know that if it all failed, I could come
back home. Yeah, And that's what I want my kids
to know that no matter what happens in life, they'll
always have food in their tummy and a roof over

(48:44):
their head.

Speaker 2 (48:45):
And I want them to have that.

Speaker 3 (48:47):
I want them to call me God forbid if something
happens and they need help, because that's my role as
a parent.

Speaker 1 (48:52):
Which must also make it all the more attractive to
be spending more time over where they are.

Speaker 2 (48:58):
It is and it's so.

Speaker 1 (48:59):
Build a little home base there for them.

Speaker 3 (49:01):
Well, they love it, and I want them to make
the most of those opportunities. That they've been given over
there and I want them to travel and to meet
new people. I love Sydney and Sydney will always be home.
I did twelve we did ten years in London, the
girls did primary school there, and then from everyone I
met when I was traveling overseas, they said, wherever your
children do high school is, it's going to be home

(49:23):
for them. And so for me that was really important,
given that I have a big family here, that Adam
has a big family here, that the girls come home
and we put roots down here. Yeah, and so Sydney will,
I think, will always be home for the girls too.
And so it's great they travel, they get to see
but both of them want to come back again. Now
they have a summer holiday and you know, a long

(49:45):
summer and the American summer, but both want to come
to Sydney and see their friends.

Speaker 2 (49:50):
And because they have that connection, they're Australian.

Speaker 1 (49:53):
I couldn't let you go without asking about style, because
you are very stylish. That this outfit, see it, that's glorious.
Has your style changed as you get older or do
you think you said before you've always had very classic taste.
And how do you decide almost how to present yourself

(50:15):
when in that very public space of being on Housewives.

Speaker 3 (50:19):
For me, is very important that I feel good in
what I wear. And a lot of that high fashion
just is not comfortable.

Speaker 2 (50:28):
It doesn't feel good.

Speaker 3 (50:29):
And also, my body shape dictates a lot of what
I wear because I am curvy, I can't wear backless,
I have a chest, I need to wear a bra.
So a lot of what I wear is dictated by
my body shape.

Speaker 2 (50:41):
And I'm realistic about what I look like.

Speaker 3 (50:45):
And you know, I've had a brutally honest mother growing up,
and she tells me if something didn't look right or wrong,
which you know, and I've been the same with my
girls and both very different and they both look amazing
in their own ways. And it's about embracing what fits
and works for you and what makes you feel good.
And you know, when you put something on, it just
doesn't feel right and you just feel a bit uncomfortable,

(51:07):
you know, I try to avoid that.

Speaker 1 (51:09):
What are the classics that you think we should all like,
proper grown up women, We should all have in our wardrobes.

Speaker 2 (51:17):
A good pair of jeans.

Speaker 3 (51:19):
Yeah, I love a great blazer, navy blazer, because a
great pair of jeans and navy blazer. The white T
shirt looks fantastic. A little black dress. I mean, these
are the classics, you know, a beautiful black suit like
these are beautiful pieces that you invest in once and
you do it properly.

Speaker 2 (51:39):
You'll have them forever.

Speaker 1 (51:41):
And you can wear them no matter what's in and out.
It's because fashing a bit bit overwhelming too, I think
as you grown.

Speaker 3 (51:46):
Up, but also you find yourself going as I heard
in one of your podcasts, that you know you have,
you know, this huge wardrobe and you end up going
for ten percent through And it's true, and that's the same.
You go for what feels comfortable.

Speaker 1 (51:58):
You do. But you know, if you if you know
what your style is, then the comfortable things often look
out too.

Speaker 3 (52:03):
But invest in pieces, like I say to my girls
from now, invest in pieces that you can see yourself
wearing in ten years and twenty years.

Speaker 1 (52:12):
Well, thank you so much, Nicole for talking to me today.
It's been cute, really fun.

Speaker 3 (52:16):
I've been really honored to have been asked to be
here today and I was very excited to.

Speaker 2 (52:20):
Come and meet you. No, it's been great. Thank you
for having me.

Speaker 3 (52:23):
Thank you.

Speaker 1 (52:28):
Friends, the glamorous version of me is out there somewhere
right now, buying a little black dress and mixing a
bloody Mary. If you want to know more about Nicole's
supplement patch business, Bond Patch, there's a link in the
show notes, and if you want to go and watch
The Real Housewives of Sydney you'll find it on Foxtel
and Binge. Massive thanks to Nicole for both coming in

(52:48):
and for saying nice things about my outfit, which shows
you just how classy that woman actually is. If you
want to hear about a version of celebrity that does
not come with money, scroll back in the feed to
a conversation I had with Simone Jade McKinnon, who has
lived a few celebrity lives, including one being engaged to
a Hollywood megastar, hearing in one of Australia's most beloved shows,

(53:11):
McLeod's Daughter's and a reality TV show, but lives between
a van and a shed on her parents' property. It's
one of my favorite conversations. And if you want to
hear more about the empty nest transition, go and listen
to Amanda Keller talking about the rule she has about
talking to her now adult sons on the phone so
that they still want to call. Links to both those

(53:33):
EPs are also in our show notes, and I'll be
back with you next week, friends, for our final episode
of mid for season four.