Legends of the Fall

This week we are reviewing the 1994 American epic historical Western drama Legends of the Fall, directed by Edward Zwick and starring Brad Pitt, Anthony Hopkins, Aidan Quinn, Julia Ormond and Henry Thomas.

Based on the 1979 novella by Jim Harrison, the film follows three brothers and their father living in the wilderness and plains of Montana in the early 20th century — and how their lives are shaped by nature, history, war and love. The timeframe spans nearly 50 years, from World War I through the Prohibition era and into a brief final scene set in 1963.

We kick things off with a travel story — and this one does not end well for a small boy who performs a good deed and receives a pocket lolly from the Aussie as a reward. A pocket lolly. Fluff and all. The Scotsman is disgusted. And he is already feeling sick — because this week introduces a brand new segment.

Rob's Rant.

A one-off, five-minute monologue. No interruptions. Scathing, unfiltered, and delivered with the full force of a man who cannot believe this film was brought to the podcast. The Scotsman gives Legends of the Fall the lowest rating in the history of the show. He is furious. Hold on to your cowboy hats.

Before the rant, he shares a story about a family faux pas — and that is what tips him over the edge.

The Aussie is heartbroken. His genuine joy when the Scotsman reveals he has not seen the film is one of the highlights of the episode — and it is shattered almost immediately. The pain is palpable.

The Aussie tries to mount his defence, but every attempt is met with the Scotsman hammering back: "defend it, defend it, defend it" — a callback to the Aussie's own interrogation tactics during the Duel episode.

We try to get to the root of the Aussie's deep, lifelong love of this film. And he tells us. It is Brad. It has always been Brad. Brad on a horse. Brad on a horse. Brad on a horse. He is dreamy.

"Did you miss out on romance growing up?" asks the Scotsman.

"Is that a serious question?" replies the Aussie, genuinely surprised.

It takes a full 37 minutes before the Aussie finally removes the rose-coloured glasses and admits what this film really is — Brad Pitt's vehicle to superstardom.

Nothing more, nothing less.

Rohan Reminisces takes us back to 1994 — a decent segment this week, with some genuinely fun facts. The Aussie then surprises everyone with a brilliant Jim Carrey impression, before immediately going bashful and refusing to continue. The Scotsman steps in as director: "take a beat," he instructs. The Aussie has absolutely no idea what that means.

There is also singing. And crying. Crying and singing.

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