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May 31, 2025 48 mins
In this episode, we explore a powerful and often overlooked therapeutic trio: EMDR, Internal Family Systems (IFS), and Motivational Interviewing (MI). If you’ve ever wondered how to help clients move from ambivalence to meaningful change—or how to make EMDR feel more relational and intuitive—this is the conversation for you. The Common Ground: Self-Leadership & Intrinsic Wisdom

What ties IFS, EMDR, and MI together? At their core, all three approaches believe this:

Clients hold the wisdom and capacity for healing inside themselves.

Whether it’s the Self in IFS, the Adaptive Information Processing (AIP) system in EMDR, or the intrinsic motivation in MI, each model honors the client as the expert on their own life. Our role is to compassionately guide, not direct.

What is Motivational Interviewing (MI)?

Larisa describes MI beautifully:

“It’s a conversation style that helps elicit people’s behavior change and resolve any ambivalence they have around making changes. It’s not about leading or following—it’s about guiding.”

MI helps clients uncover their values and use those as fuel for transformation. It's relational, respectful, and deeply humanizing.

MI’s Spirit: PACE as a Compass

To show up for clients in the MI spirit, we bring:

  • Partnership

  • Acceptance

  • Compassion

  • Empowerment

This allows for true connection—creating a space where clients feel safe enough to explore, question, and grow.

MI in Action: A Bridge to EMDR

As Larisa shares, many clinicians struggle with applying EMDR, especially in early stages. MI offers a crucial entry point—helping clients prepare, build trust, and find clarity in their goals.

“Our clients come in with ambivalence—about therapy, about EMDR. MI helps us meet them where they are.”

MI enhances EMDR’s Stage One (Preparation) phase by bringing in empathy, reflection, and alignment with client values.

A Case Example: Matthew Perry & the Power of Discrepancy

Imagine a young Matthew Perry wrestling with abandonment wounds and addiction. MI helps us uncover the discrepancy between where he is and where he wants to be. It’s not just about stopping a behavior—it’s about healing the parts that carry unmet needs and pain.

Reflections, Change Talk & “DARN CATs”

MI offers tools to strengthen internal alignment:

  • DARN (Desire, Ability, Reason, Need) – the seeds of change

  • CATs (Commitment, Activation, Taking Steps) – the momentum for action

These can powerfully support Phase Four of EMDR, especially when clients are ready to take new steps—but feel unsure how.

Integration & Future Templating

MI isn’t just for the beginning—it shines in re-evaluation and future planning too:

“Sometimes clients say they’re ready for change—but don’t know how. This is where we go back to Evoking and Planning. MI gives us tools to break it down, make it concrete, and support clients in taking those next steps.”

Whether you're addressing co-occurring issues or preparing for future challenges, MI helps keep the work grounded, hopeful, and empowering.

Final Thoughts: Parts Want to Grow

IFS reminds us that all parts—even protectors—ultimately want healing. MI offers a lens to honor that growth:

“There’s a fear in IFS that we don’t want to change parts. But MI helps us see it differently: Parts want to grow. Our goal is to encourage the intrinsic desire of parts to grow.”

🌐 Learn more about Larisa and her work: empowertct.


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