September 18, 2025 • 57 mins
Episode 14 – Jacqualine Rhoades | Don’t Worry, Little Ridge
Jacqualine Rhoades is the author of Don’t Worry, Little Ridge, a children’s book written in the aftermath of the devastating Dixie Fire that burned through Paradise, California. In this episode, she shares the inspiration behind the book, her personal connection to the fire, and how storytelling can help children and families cope with trauma and loss.
This is a conversation about resilience, healing, and the power of words to bring comfort when everything else feels uncertain.
#ChildrensBooks #DixieFire #ParadiseCalifornia #HealingThroughStories #Resilience #RenoPodcast #4thStreetLive
Don't Worry Little Ridge | Jacqualine Rhoades
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Intro music: “You and Whose Army?” by Radiohead. Licensed courtesy of Warner Chappell Music and Radiohead. All rights reserved.
Fourth Street Live is hosted by Jacob Green, a Reno-based author, musician, biker, and storyteller, bringing raw conversations about recovery, motorcycles, and local culture.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:57):
This is Jacob, the host of the 4th St.
Live podcast, and my new book, The Rail Runner, inspired by my
life on the railroad and being arailroad contractor, is now for
sale on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.
Please go check out my new storyif you're looking to escape
reality for a few hours. It's a great read.
Support a local Reno author. Thanks so much.
(01:18):
So it's like 1 you have to dresslike APTA mom.
The other one you have to dress like every man's fucking wet
fantasy. OK, I think I fulfilled that on
both ends. Because it's lady in public
fucking the Punisher. But isn't isn't PTA mom what I.
(01:40):
Think so cuz it's the all American dream.
Like when I started working there, Jim was like OK, well
what I really want from you is the girl next door.
He's like, this is exactly it. You'll do.
Cuz I was like, can I be a dancer?
We need to talk about this. When was that?
I think it was four years ago. Got it.
I called him and was like, can Ibe a stripper?
Yeah. He's like, nobody's seen you in
(02:02):
10 years. Sick.
We're going to have to have a chat about this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I met him and he saw me and
he's. Oh yeah.
Yeah, girl next door. Yeah, but I think that's pretty
much like, you know, like when you're married, your husband
expects you to be a lady in public, but then you're supposed
to be a slut. In the bedroom.
In the bedroom. So it's like kind of like a.
Yeah, you want to. Balance that.
(02:22):
So I think being an author and then being a dancer.
I know the what do you call it? The the conundrum, I guess,
because I biker not supposed to be an author, right?
You know what I mean, Or it's not a common thing.
And it was like, I like smashingthose kind of stereotypes.
(02:43):
I like being able to say fuck eloquently and not being able
not worried about. I don't know that I'm not
fitting the social norm. I didn't go to college, you know
what I mean? And whatever, and I'm still just
as capable. I don't know.
I think that that was the big thing for me.
I think that comes with, you know, you're not stereotypical
(03:04):
if you really think about it. Like, how many strippers do you
know that I've actually published a book?
I only know one. As long as she's like 60
something years old, I'm gonna bless her soul for still going
through it. But at the same time, it's like
you're not really that demographic to be like, oh, you
could be an author like Nate being like, you can be
president. Oh, fucking thanks, Nathaniel,
for believing in me so much. I love that.
(03:25):
Here's your copy. But it's.
Yeah, I don't know. So I have to go an in betweeny.
Whatever. I did my Barnes and Noble book
signing and what ended up happening as I posted the video
in LinkedIn and the lady from I guess Goodles Noodles, one of
their CE OS reached out on my LinkedIn body, shamed me for
(03:47):
being chesty in a sun dress. And if she would have seen me
outside in the public at a Barnes and Noble for a book
signing with her six year old, she would have turned around and
walked out. And I was just like.
So your body shaming me because I'm big trusted in a sun dress.
I was like, but if I was a stickfigure, you wouldn't body shame
me and you'd be like, Oh my gosh, I would love to get a book
(04:09):
from you. Yeah, this this person looks
like an author. Yeah, but.
This one I'll buy a book from. Yeah.
So it's kind of like. That hard space between being,
you know, looking the way that Ido and also being an author,
it's like most people don't takeyou seriously anyways, so I had
done a video. Reach Out with Alaska helped me
and when we did that, we did like this whole reach out.
(04:33):
It was during the Sidney Sweeneything where you know, don't like
her in jeans, you know, 'cause it's.
Blue eyed, blonde hair, stereotypical.
That's what men want, you know that's.
What sells? I mean, so Alaska and I did a
reach out video during the same time that Sidney Sweeney got
shamed at the same time for being busty in a pair of jeans
and a open blouse top. So for me it was the same thing
(04:57):
is I understood how she felt. So I did not reach video and I
was like OK well. You know what, like I will still
be taken seriously no matter what I look like.
I was like, women don't come in one-size-fits-all categories.
We are all different shapes and sizes and there's somebody for
everybody. And if my chest is offensive to
you, I was like, that's something for you to sit with.
That is wild. And so I put that out there and
(05:20):
the worst part about it, it was one of the CE OS from Goodles
Noodles and their sogo is women empowering women.
And I was like, not really, but really, yeah.
Really. That is funny.
I've I and is that kid that is going to pick up that book going
to give a fuck? You know what I mean?
No. That's the worst part is you
just told him I was good for onething, when you saw me.
(05:42):
Yeah. Stereotyped me and left the
room. I was like, yeah.
But you just. Taught him that I was
incompetent enough to write a. Book so empowering women, but
you have to look like a nerd. Let me just not wash my face,
throw my hair in a messy bun in sweatpants then would you have
thought for me? That's bullshit and I'm sorry
that happened. But also there's something to be
(06:06):
said about, I don't know, the state of the world.
I guess you know what I mean? I really do believe that there's
the empower people. Empowering people is just the
most important thing right now. I'm not supposed to be.
I don't look like an author. One of the hardest things I've
dealt with also is being a new author who doesn't have a
(06:27):
college background. My writing style is not the same
as anyone else's writing style, which I want, you know what I
mean? My, my guy is Cormac McCarthy,
who wrote No Country for Old Men, that's who like I look up
to. And I wanted to write like him,
Westerny, you know, and like kind of noir and, you know, like
(06:48):
same deal as everybody that I'vedealt with was like, I just
don't know where to put you, youknow what I mean?
And that's been kind of a thing.So I definitely know.
And you have an agent. Are you working on getting an
agent? I'm still working on it.
I've sent over 6060 queries out already and it is.
It's the hardest thing, especially for picture books and
(07:09):
for children's literary agents, I guess are the hardest ones for
you to actually find versus likewhether you're doing fiction or
non fiction, you're doing a novel or it's a thriller.
Most literary agents, they have what type of book that they're
looking for, whether what their categories are and to fit in a
category of a picture book is the hardest one to find.
(07:31):
That's what I've ran into anyways.
It's just always, OK, well, we'll just try the next one.
I mean, I did get great feedback.
By one of these literary agents.She is in New York, and she has.
Multibillion dollar literary agency and she said good luck.
This is a great book and I really think that it's needed.
So, you know, hope that you're able to find the right
(07:53):
children's literary agent. So you know that coming for some
from somebody of her status and her background and what she
does, I think that speaks volumes for me just because of
the fact that means that someoneout there is going to be like.
Oh, this one. This book because they see the
potential that it has, especially for, you know, the
(08:15):
type of book that it is, for it to be released and be the first
of its kind for its demographic,for kindergarteners through 6th
graders, for PTSD and wildfires.That's not something that's
heard of, especially something that's not graphic in images to
where it's going to startle and traumatize a child because there
is another book that's out therethat has been written from this
(08:36):
artist in Paradise, CA. But the only problem is the
detail in the photos and the illustration is so traumatizing.
At the time when I had seen it and Christina was probably like
6 or 7 and still having outbursts and stuff like that
due to, you know, what he had seen.
I was like, if I read this to him, Oh my God.
I can only imagine the amount oftrauma that he is going to go
(08:57):
through and then relive through such vivid imaging.
So that's what scared me to evenpick that one up where this one
is soft, the edges are rounded. Even though that it has, you
know, the fire through one of the pages on there, it's just
enough to touch on the subject to trigger, trigger an emotion
in order for a child to express their emotions freely.
(09:19):
For me, when I wrote this, I honestly wrote it for my boys
when they were five and eight atthe time and I was working as
APTA mom, volunteering my time in the.
School 'cause that's what we do.In the middle of nowhere.
So I was PTA mom volunteering inthe classroom and I worked part
(09:40):
time senior care and after the fire I was working with the
school psychologist, you know, just because you know, my
children have special needs and and I was like, do we have any
resources for natural disasters such as wildfires?
Any pamphlets, anything? And he's like, I'm sorry,
Jackie, I got nothing. And I was like, you're a
psychologist, you should have something so.
(10:01):
And where were you living beforeyou moved here?
Before I moved back here to Reno.
I was living in Paradise, CA. Nice.
California. Yeah.
And we're going to get into the book itself, but first I'd like
to talk about you a little bit and growing and, and being in
Paradise, CA. What had you moved to Paradise,
(10:23):
CA? Did you like it?
And how did you, why did you move back to Reno, you know?
OK so for me, I moved to Paradise, CA when I wanted to
change from Reno. I had work service industry for
a really long time, you know, being in my 20s and stuff like
that and I kind of want to change.
I married my boyfriend at the time right before we left.
(10:44):
Then we plan to have another baby.
So we were pregnant, we wanted anew start and we decided that
that would be the best area. It was closer to some of his
family. So when we went out there, we
were like, oh, it's really pretty out here.
And it was outside of Chico, so it wasn't really like that party
town feel. It was more mellow, laid back,
(11:05):
community base, all the parents were in the classroom and stuff
like that. So that's kind of what I wanted
for my kids is they would have asafer, more comfortable space
for them to adjust. And so that's why I moved there.
And then I moved back here to Reno.
Leave 2021 and going through divorce I'm on, which was a
(11:25):
really rough patch for me. But at the same time, it's
growth, it's change for the bestfor my children.
But also I couldn't keep my children in Paradise, CA after
the fire. And every year we had a fire
that would come through our cityabout 9 miles from our property.
So when your children are wakingup in the middle of the night
(11:47):
and they can smell smoke or you have ash going through your
house and blowing around outsideand the kids can smell it, it
wakes them up. Or running on a generator.
That type of trauma does, does just doesn't go away.
It's like a reoccurring trauma. So you sometimes you can't heal
in the same places that made yousick.
So for me, I just did what was best for them.
(12:09):
It was something that I needed to do so then I wouldn't always
be in fight or flight. And better, better mental health
for myself and for my children. And which fire was it?
That was the last one that was likely to get the fuck out of
here. It was the.
Dixie Fire, It was 9 miles from the house.
We ended up getting up in the middle of the night and there
(12:30):
was ash and ember and it was flying all over the property and
down the street. I mean, it honestly looked like
it was snowing. It was just coming towards you.
And yeah, they shut the cell towers off.
They shut off the power. And so you're running on a
generator and there's no way to check and see what's going on in
the town. So you can imagine leaving your
(12:50):
kids and then having to go down the street.
So you have enough cell service.So then you can check on
Facebook and see what's going onin the town of Paradise.
You're like, OK, do we need to evacuate or are we going to
stay? But when minutes only count in
the type of space that we've been put in before with a
campfire, you don't have that kind of time to just go down the
street and be like, oh, well, you know, 5 minutes doesn't
(13:11):
matter. But in order to have some sort
of service, then that's what we had to do.
And then by the time we got there, they were like, oh, it's
not an evacuation order, it's anevacuation warning.
But then outside, surrounding areas are under an order and
you're like, OK, so you get the kids up in the middle of the
night and then they can see behind the grocery store and off
(13:32):
in the mountain that there's fire and your kids like you.
Have to pee? And you're stuck in traffic and
he's peeing on the side of the road and he's shaking and going.
You don't want to die. I'm like, it's OK.
So you can imagine all that typeof trauma that they're going
through, and to stay in an environment like that, it's not
(13:53):
going to help them heal. So that's what forced all the
change for me to move. It's like, Nope.
That one was the worst because Igrew up in my summers
lifeguarding at Almanor and there was a camp up there just
up into the mountains past Chester, CA right.
(14:14):
And I literally my it's like my childhood, right from the time I
think I was 11 to the time I waseven 17.
I spent every summer of my life lit sleeping in this camp in up
in the middle of by Chester and that Dixie fire wiped out that
camp, wiped out my childhood, you know what I mean?
And it was it was like and Chester still doesn't even look
(14:35):
the same, you know, like that whole town, like the I think
it's the West southwest part of Almanor.
It still doesn't look like the same thing.
You know what I mean? That one was that one was crazy
and it was going forever. You know what I mean?
What caused that one? Do they know?
I can't remember looking back onit, it was a while ago I.
(14:57):
I was going. To say I think it was power
lines. A lot of the things that we find
is even with the campfires, theydidn't report it soon enough.
So whenever you have a spark andsomething falls on the ground,
as we learned, then it's going to cause a fire.
Especially there, especially with the winds and the Darbo Gap
and everything that goes through, you know, in the
mountains back there, it's way too windy for them to be able to
(15:17):
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St. life. Thanks so much and so how did
you deal with it just as a parent before this idea for this
(16:03):
book and the conception of this book.
How did you go with it as a parent with?
Your kids. Winged it as a parent.
That's what we do, right? We were displaced after the fire
here in Reno. We stayed.
At I'm trying to think of the name of the hotel.
It's right there in legends. It's going to say Hilton Suites
or something like that. At the Legends Mall, Yeah, the
Marriott right there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
(16:24):
So we were back there and you know, obviously we knew that our
house was burnt down, everybody lost their property.
So there was all of these different changes and we
couldn't get them in counseling soon enough.
And then when we did, it was more like a court ordered
situation for families. So it wasn't the right fit for
us. The children were non responsive
(16:46):
and it was just consistently battling meltdowns.
Camden hiding in the bathroom. Once we finally did get him re
enrolled into school out here atVan Gorder.
And then his little brother would just stop in the middle of
the room anywhere and just scream.
And the most that you can do is give them grace for the things
that they're going through and being like, if I can manage my
(17:10):
emotions and my feelings to the best of my abilities, but it's
still hard for me as an adult, you can only imagine being five
and eight years old and trying to manage your emotions.
And that's what we're going to get, right?
So giving them that grace and that space to just be like, I
understand how you feel, kid. If it was socially acceptable, I
would do that too. But as a parent, the most you
(17:32):
can do is just show up and console them.
But yeah, I know counseling was working.
So it was just. Comfort in providing them just
that space in order to have thatmoment and then be there.
Comfort them and start back over.
Yeah, that's all you can do. No.
And it's a lot of, it's a lot ofthings happening at once too in
your life, which is wild. And that's.
(17:53):
Yeah, you know, where are we going to live, right?
How am I going to cook in this hotel?
California. Not California.
Fuck you knew Zoom. Yeah, the climate change and all
their crap that they wanted to blame it on was absolutely
asinine. Yeah, it just came down to them
not allowing them to go in thereand trim the trees, right?
You know what I mean? It's like such a simple thing,
(18:15):
right? Well, some of that, but a lot of
it, it just wasn't reported. I'm sure there's underlying
reasons of why the town burnt down.
We'll never really know, but I'msure that just comes down to
premeditated situations. Yeah, well, Reno's glad to have
you back, dude. I'm happier here than there.
I don't always feel like something's going to catch on
(18:36):
fire, not always in a consistentstate of fight or flight.
So my nervous system has calmed down a lot since being here.
Same with my kids. They're adjusted now, so.
So what gave you the idea for the conception of this book,
this children's story? Honestly, after all of the work
and going back to paradise, I volunteered in the classroom
(18:58):
with A teacher that I was reallygood friends with and one of the
other grandparents. And after watching all the
things that the kids were going through was really, really hard.
The environment and the things and the stressors that they were
going through was non-stop. Just seeing the grief in their
(19:20):
faces and just all the traumas that the boys were going
through. I was like, I can't just sit
and. Go with the idea of the school
psychologist telling me, oh, we have no resources.
OK, well, we're going to make one.
I don't care if I write this thing down in a spiral notebook
because that's what I did as a mother.
And I sat there and I wrote thisbook sitting on my bed while the
(19:44):
kids were at school one day. And it took me about a week to
finish. And then one day I ended up
sitting down with them and I read it to them and it was the
craziest thing is it was just ina spiral notebook.
It didn't have pictures. It didn't have anything except
for words. And the first thing out of my
(20:07):
child's mouth. Christian was 6, I believe.
Yeah, about 6. Fuck PG&E.
Yeah, that's hilarious. So for a little tiny child to
say that, I gave him that space and I was like, that's the only
time you were allowed to say it,that word.
So I wasn't mad. I didn't care because that's how
(20:28):
I felt too. But then my other son was like
from the PlayStation back, burned my house down.
Just reading all of that to themstarted a conversation not only
for them to strike up questions.What made them mad?
Their losses, their concerns. So for me, as a parent, I was
(20:49):
like, well damn. That's more than we got out of
them. In counseling.
So I was like, OK, And so I justwent with it and I just kept
reading the book to them. So the kids volunteering in the
school and my boys were my main reason to write this book was to
give them some sort of peace or at least be able to understand
(21:10):
what their emotions were and howthey were feeling.
So then I could address it and be the best version of their
parent. You know, in order to help them,
because nothing else was going to except for me.
No, that's real. And what was that creative
process like that that week longcreative process?
Was it just you had a thought, you started writing?
Is that kind of just? Oh it literally just float out
(21:32):
of me. I changed a couple words here
and there, but I literally had it written down the first two
days and then after that was just adjusting it, moving pages.
And yeah, I had no struggles, nonothing with.
This it's your medium. Did you handwrite?
Oh yeah. Got it full on paper, no I.
(21:52):
Can't. I can't read my handwriting,
otherwise I'd do that, but I totally.
The children's book It is an easy read, so kindergarteners
through 6 cutters a little easier to write for.
For sure, yeah, my mom calls that feeling the call to create,
you know what I mean? And it's real, it's a real
fucking thing. And it's funny 'cause everyone
gets that feeling and not a lot of only artists are usually the
(22:13):
ones that listen to that. And my mom calls that.
And I, my whole life I didn't really have it until funny
enough that I started working onmotorcycles and building
motorcycles, you know what I mean?
And customizing motorcycles. And I'd look at something and
I'd be like, it's just not right, you know what I mean?
And and I didn't know what that feeling was for a long time.
(22:33):
And my mom finally was like, no,that's the call.
This call to create is call to deuce.
I was like, fuck it is. And it's crazy because that
feeling eats away at me if I don't listen to it now.
Exactly. I'm same.
That's how I wrote the second book that I wrote.
I literally wrote it in less than 24 hours.
I started it at work and then I was like, OK, I went off early
(22:56):
because I'm going to go home andfinish it and I finished it
within an hour when I got home. So I know how that is.
It's like it's a pull. It's.
A creative pull. And if you don't let it out,
then it's like you're completelyoff because you know that you're
not doing what you're intended to do.
And I feel like that's divine purpose.
At least that's how I feel. That's how I feel too.
(23:16):
I feel like it's a gift that, you know, I'm sure you feel the
same way that you have inside ofyou and you're supposed to share
it. And if you don't share it, or
you don't finish or accomplish, then you're not doing what
you're called to do. Yeah, no, I feel like that with
with like I even feel with, I'llget that feeling with like
renovations in my house. I do renovations in my house
like a nut job, but I'll get that feeling.
(23:38):
Well, I'll like look up at something and I'll be like, that
doesn't look right. And then I spend the fucking day
knocking a wall down with John, my producer, you know what I
mean? Or something, you know, we just,
I just, I do get that feeling. And if there's anybody listening
that gets a feeling it's OK to not know what the fuck you're
doing. It's not OK to just not do it
(23:58):
though. Create and the same as you did
not have any background writing except for maybe a freshman high
school literary class. You know what I'm saying?
You're. Like, but that was.
Forced for sure it was and it was and I had to think back to
that and man, I don't my grammar, everything, dude, it
was it was it was a it was a muscle I had to kind of reignite
(24:22):
in my life. You know what I mean?
I do. Know what that's like?
Yeah, It's like, OK, when we were put in school and we had to
do this, it was like, not the right subject or you're like,
I'm bored. But then when it's something
that you're passionate about, it's going to come out and it's
just going to flow. It's not something that you have
to really think about here and there, like changing a word or a
(24:44):
sentence here and there, checking your spelling.
I'm always just crazy publish authors and we ought to check
our spelling. Yeah, for sure.
Somebody else checks everybody else's spelling.
I think, and I think my spellinggot checked like 7 times.
Then I ran it through what is itGrammarly, like twice, you know
what I mean? And then there was like before I
published, I had to make sure that it that now there's like
(25:06):
people writing books with AI. So I had to run it through AI so
people know I didn't write it, run it with AI.
You know what I mean? There's like a bunch of there's
a bunch of stuff involved with that.
And yeah, no, that's I appreciate people following that
call or whatever that call to create.
That's the people I want to talkto.
Those are the people that I knowhave done something and just
(25:27):
listen to whatever. And that's like you said, it's
divine. I think it's something telling
you to do something, you know, so, so now run us through the
story a little bit. Give us a a synopsis of start to
finish. Start to finish.
So it's kind of a journey of howeverything went for us, though
(25:48):
it starts off with obviously thetown of Paradise and everybody
being happy. And it's all children base.
They have their little Nick niche, they're all happy,
they're comfortable in their space.
It's, you know, surreal, like where we lived.
So every place that we would go is very well known to the
(26:11):
children in our community. So everything through the book
is all places that actually exist in Paradise, CA.
So it goes from the parks to theschool to even us being
displaced and telling children that it's going to be OK.
That changes, you know, something that everybody's going
(26:33):
to go through in this type of situation, whether that's
leaving and then moving, starting a new school.
Some people being able to move back into the community after a
rebuild of the school is what I did in here.
Showing real images that were captured by the illustrator, you
know, in his artwork to a tee onhow he did everything for the
(26:57):
illustrations. So it literally just goes
through the change and the growth and the strength and
resilience through the book, andthen some of the children moving
back into the community and going back to being with their
friends or making new friends. So that's kind of what he did
with this book, is showing all the growth and change that
children are going to go throughbased off of the traumatic event
(27:20):
and showing them that it's OK tofeel these feelings and these
types of emotions and that everybody else is going through
this type of change as well. It wasn't just something that
was happening only to them, so then they knew that they weren't
alone in what they were going through.
So that's what I did with this. Oh, that's a beautiful thing.
And after you've published this story, was it?
(27:47):
I know you've sold quite a few copies.
I know you're on. You're on Barnes and Noble,
Amazon. What else are you on?
I. Have my own website,
jacquelinerhodesrights.com and then also on YouTube.
And then, yeah, so we're trying to get it more going in other
directions as well. Still a pain.
As you know with that query it's.
(28:08):
A it's a lot. And I also think that like the
less I focus on how the more good seems to come and I just
kind of I do, but that doesn't mean don't send letters and try
and do it and try and do that. But it just means I just I'm
more focused on the process and not wearing so much just me
(28:31):
personally, you know what I mean?
And goodwill come. It's just all that's just how
it's worked for me so far. But I do know what you mean.
And this is definitely somethingthat's a powerful thing.
And Reno authors is a you were in paradise, but you're a Reno
person. So the people in paradise, what
is their take? Is it?
(28:51):
Was it received well from your old community?
Through the community when I didthe Chocolate Festival, yes.
And then I had a lot of other, believe it or not, teachers that
would come up to me. And they're like, you have to
get this book into Hawaii. You need to get this book into
Pasadena for the LA Fire. And, you know, they're reaching
out to our community because they've never been through
(29:13):
something like this. And with us going through this
already, you know, this would bea great resource for, you know,
their staff and for the childrento have.
And so that's what I've been working on right now.
So I have donated books to Lahaina.
I have donated books to Palisades, and then I'm donating
books to Pasadena this week as well.
(29:34):
So doing my best. So I try not to get.
Discouraged on it, I just go where Yeah, my heart and God
tells me to go with this, no. That's what I've been doing.
And like you said, this is a resource, this is a tool because
it's such a a lot of parents. I think the one of the strongest
qualities of a parent is it crazy.
Shit happens in life. And the testament to, in my
(29:59):
opinion, really great parents istheir ability to handle trauma
with their kids or things that have happened with their kids
instead of doing nothing or pretending like it's not a
problem 'cause that doesn't fix anything.
That exacerbates the issue. And I think that what's cool
about this is it translates so well not just to kids that have
(30:25):
been experienced natural disasters, but anything else,
you know what I mean? It's just, hey, this happened to
us and this is how we dealt withit.
And there there is a happy ending.
You know what I mean? There is a positive at the end.
Shit does re get grow back and rebuild and it's OK.
And this is sad and it's out of your control.
(30:45):
And that's life. And it's there's a, there's
quite a few powerful key lessonsin this for me that I really
enjoyed, which was, yeah, just like, hey, shit happens.
It sucks feeling out of control.Life isn't fair sometimes.
But this is what can come of that.
Look at the look at the community up there now, closer
than ever, you know, and. Outreach that the community is
(31:09):
able to do with all the other places that have been affected
by wildfires. Right, and shed light on the
problem. There is a problem.
It's. A major problem for California
I'm all as they're learning and I don't think that you know this
is going to be the last wildfire.
Obviously we're just going through a new beginning with
that type of situation through California with fires and
(31:31):
wildfires all over. Well, it's pretty traumatizing.
I, you know, for the adults, butit's really hard for the
children. I'm all, and sometimes we have
to step out of our own space of trauma and remember that they're
little and they don't know how to get through that.
And we're the ones that have to lead.
Sometimes you have to take a minute from yourself and be
(31:52):
selfless and go, OK, what do we do next?
And the feedback that I've gotten.
From this book. Has been quite amazing,
especially for one of the stories that I was told on.
I was going to say Mike's LittleGirl.
She's I want to say 5 or 6. And she read the book and hadn't
(32:14):
been through anything like this.And she was like, have you heard
about the story of Paradise Dad?Oh my gosh.
It has a really sad middle, but it has a great ending.
But the questions that came fromthat was like, why did this
happen? Are they going to rebuild?
Like asking your dad like all these different questions and
inquiring was a great thing because even if you haven't gone
(32:38):
through this as a child, you're still going to have questions.
And then it's going to give you that knowledge.
Like say you have another child that comes in your classroom and
has gone through it. And another child just reading
this book would understand the type of feelings that they have
in that situation. So it gives them empathy towards
other kids that have gone through that type situation in
(32:59):
that space. It's hard it.
Is and yeah, like some kids are never going to know what that
was, you know what I mean? So it does, like you just said,
it gives them an opportunity to familiarize themselves with why
your kid was so upset. They'll never know, you know
what I mean? But they can read the story and
identify. Have you been back there since?
(33:20):
Yes. So I went out for the Paradise
Chocolate Festival and then I went out for a Paradise party in
the park and that was before 4thof July.
And then I did a news interview out there two days before 4th of
July. Yeah.
So I've been out there a couple times.
Is. It the same.
No, it's not the same. It's not as hard for me to go
(33:42):
through there anymore because the growth has come back quite a
bit, so you don't see as many tree stumps.
And it's not as hard to be around 'cause when I first went
there it just gave me anxiety and kind of made it feel like I
couldn't breathe. And I was like, OK, we need to
leave. We're here.
We saw goodbye. But with the greenery that's
growing back, it's at least a sense of, you know, hope and
(34:07):
hopefully we can make it something close to what it was
before. But I honestly don't know.
It's not as many people that live there now as before.
So it's still, for me, very hard.
Very hard, yes. You had a book signing at Barnes
and Noble. Tell us what that was like.
(34:27):
Oh my gosh, it was so much fun. I did my book signing in Reno,
and I think that it was a littlequiet 'cause there was a giant
rainstorm that day. But the type of traction that we
got from it was a lot of moms, couple firefighters.
And so there was just people coming up and inquiring about
(34:49):
the book. What was it about?
Oh my gosh, that's paradise CA. I can't believe that like, you
were there, you survived. And I was like, yeah, so what's
a book about? Oh, it's a book for my children.
So I don't know. I really enjoyed doing it.
It was a lot of fun. I was there with the illustrator
as well. He just thought it was amazing
(35:11):
how far we've come with it. And being able to do a Barnes
and Noble, Barnes and Noble booksigning was something that I was
very passionate about. Like this is it, this is going
to be so much fun. Like All authors as you know,
like you'd just be tickled. Just be like, oh, I've made it
this far. Like I'm signing books now.
Look. So I think the best part for me
(35:33):
was when the moms would come up and they'd.
Be like, Oh my gosh, I love you're going to take it to the
register and go check out. And their kids, we did print out
coloring pages. And so the kids were all there
and they were coloring the pictures from actual images
inside the book. And they're like, no, we don't
want to go to the register. And I was like, they can't stay
here in color. Oh, wow, you're such a mom,
(35:55):
dude. I'm a hell yeah.
My wife has those like every time we go anywhere.
And the kids, she has these things that the kids can just
fucking color. What do you call it's like these
poodle pad? No, it's, it's like these little
leather patches that they can color and you can wipe them off.
I don't know. But she's a, she's a mom like
you. And she just is always pulling
(36:15):
shit out like like we have stuffin our purse because when I
leave the house, we leave the house, we're in and out in 5
minutes. And I'm like, why the fuck takes
everybody so long to get out of the house?
And it's that it's because you're bringing everything that
I just don't care, you know whatI mean?
So. We're preventative.
You're a mom. We don't.
Want to hear? Screaming, we don't want them to
be like, Oh my God, they don't have this and they need it.
(36:35):
Or something happens, it goes wrong and you needed it and you
don't have it for sure. So it's always a mom.
That's mom life for sure. So you talked a little bit
earlier about some of the backlash you received and it had
nothing to do with the story. And that's what's crazy.
So I let's talk about some thosekind of things that you were
(36:58):
dealing with because it is insane to me.
One of the large one of the likeI just said, one of the biggest
things I dealt with was people. I'm for be first.
Being a first time author is always tabooed at any publicist
publishing company. It's like nobody wants to touch
(37:19):
a first time author. It's like, it's like, so I
should have been writing since Iwas 18 and I should have 55
novels. And it's like there's a lot of
insecurity and I approach everything in my life the way I
do being a biker is I don't givea fuck what you think, you know
what I mean? And so that has actually gotten
me a lot better in that cause like, dude, you're a nerd, just
(37:41):
fucking publish my shit, you know what I mean?
So it, that mentality has been alot better 'cause it's like, I
just don't care. This is a, it's like telling
Banksy not saying I'm fucking Jesus Christ.
It's like telling Banksy that that's not art, you know what I
mean? It's like, nobody can fucking
tell you shit, you know? And there's an audience for
everything. But I'm sure there's other
(38:05):
people who are similar to you, maybe have the same job as you,
or just are the same kind of mentality as you.
Mom, that doesn't give a fuck what you think, you know what I
mean? That might be afraid to put
things out there. What would you say to those
people? Honestly, I think for me, I
(38:26):
haven't been taken seriously forthe way that I look, my body
shape. Yeah, it must be hard having
your obviously physical disadvantages of the world you.
Definitely have to dress certainways to be socially acceptable.
But you know, I've kind of gone this far.
I'm like, you know, everybody has a different body shape.
(38:50):
We are not A1 size fits all. I'm not here to make you
comfortable because you're uncomfortable with my body.
I am fully clothed, covered. I have been body shamed.
And even if you're not, who gives a fuck?
That's what I hate. You know, with everything
showing like that is definitely not me.
I am totally a lady. But if I want to wear a sun
(39:12):
dress, sun dress and you're going to tell me that there's
something wrong because I'm too busty or curvy to wear a sun
dress when I'm fully clevered. And you want to body shame me
and tell me that I can't be taken seriously as an author.
That's when you need to reflect and think about the things that
are wrong inside yourself beforeyou would even body shame
another woman. I do not believe on woman hate
(39:34):
crime. Like that's not me.
If you want to wear that, go forit.
If you're comfortable in your own skin, that's a good thing.
That's how we should be. Yeah, no, that's real.
My, my, my wife got her. I got her an augmentation last
year and it's funny because she's had some she can wear
whatever she wants, whenever shewants because I can fight so I
(39:55):
don't care. So I don't.
And me saying like, you know, don't wear that out is to me.
I just don't give a fuck, you know what I mean?
And it's definitely been like that where ever since then she's
had like the sneaker. I'm like, what the fuck?
And my wife is the kind of girl that will be like we're out and
you look great in that out, you know what I mean?
(40:17):
And like, that's something I think is.
Is important is like that women value and women women kind of
thing and building them up. I'm not a woman.
I don't know what you guys go through.
I have no idea you know what I mean, but.
It's hard. It's hard especially when you're
trying to enter a professional line of business, especially as
you know, being an author, beingtaken seriously and to be
(40:40):
comfortable in your own skin or to be able to speak freely, be
in public, be in a public setting.
Am I wearing the right thing? Is this going to be acceptable?
But then at a certain point you just have to remember that we're
all human and honestly, fuck anybody that tells you that
there's something wrong with your body because we're all made
(41:02):
differently. And it's not like I'm supposed
to make you comfortable. If you're uncomfortable because
I have a big chest, I'm sorry that makes you uncomfortable.
I'm uncomfortable in the fact that you're.
Uncomfortable. You're even thinking about it.
Yeah. And we're just talking to me
like a person. Yeah, I'm like don't, but don't
devalue me based on how I look. And that's even.
(41:25):
Yeah. I think that that's the same
thing for even just being a pretty girl.
That's a hard thing too, yeah. I'm all so it's a lot of.
Different factors, yeah. Other people's opinions of me
are none of my business. Yeah.
And it doesn't provide or give me any value that has to come
from yourself a little bit. You know what I mean?
And 100% it's like people that have the most to say and the
(41:48):
most opinions are usually the ones who are the most insecure
about whatever they got going oneither aesthetically, which is
it happens. But it's also the loudest people
in the room truly are the weakest people in the room.
And those are the ones that are missing something from their
life, don't have a calmness in their heart when they wake up in
the morning like those people. I like we have this thing in a,
(42:12):
a where you, you feel bad, we feel bad for those people.
You know what I mean? I genuinely didn't get that at
first. I didn't get the people that are
angry all the time and mad all the time and you just want to be
angry back. I genuinely understand now what
they were talking about where you feel sorry for those people
because those people are obviously missing something from
their lives. And they, it doesn't provide me
(42:32):
any value. The only value I have is what I
do. And the other thing too is if
there's one person or one kid orone parent that has read your
story and had some semblance of peace or even nostalgia, you've,
you've achieved your goal, even if it's just one, you know what
(42:52):
I mean? And more than one is read it.
So, so you've definitely achieved what you're trying to
do, regardless of what anybody thinks about it.
That's how I feel. And that is that is a real, real
thing. Is there more books to come,
something different? Is it just was this an inspiring
thing and I? Kind of started a little effect.
(43:13):
So I have already started another book.
It's finished. It's already sketched out for
illustration. It's a book on hurricanes.
So it's called Look here Hurricane.
It's just about an extremely ambitious child that wants to be
helpful with his father in orderto help him prepare for a
hurricane that's coming and the change that comes along with it.
(43:36):
And then the following up of devastation.
But then still giving that pieceof hope and resilience through
the bravery of the child and theelement of distraction.
But he carries around like this little teddy bear, that's the
emotional peace through the story.
So the teddy bear feels the emotion where the child's just
(43:56):
extremely ambitious. And it's like, oh, we're fine,
you know? But it shows the resilience, you
know, and the bravery and, you know, the change and the
aftermath, but then still the peace and the hope afterwards.
So it is the second book that I wrote.
It's already done, we just need to get it illustrated.
But we're on a hold because I'm still moving this and still
(44:19):
trying to do the literary agent direction with this book.
So being able to do that first would be one of the things that
would help me finish the second one.
Yeah, have you? And that's a kid story as well.
It is got you another kindergarten through 6th grade
easy read book. Have you thought about writing
long form? Is it something you thought
about? Honestly, the longest thing that
(44:41):
I'm gonna be writing is when I put together my biography.
Cool. So I think that's gonna be 1 of
the rawest things for me. But you write my biography and
I'll write yours. There you go, dude.
OK, the T we have to still to get here.
My shit's gonna be crazy. Amal, do you really want to
know? My Dirty Little secrets and T.
OK, sure. And then just change everybody's
(45:03):
name. OK, deal, deal.
You don't have to change my names.
No cops can read your shit. But OK, yeah, there might be a
couple things that they're probably not going to be able to
read mine. No, sorry mom.
Mine's not that interesting. It's too short.
Yours, yours I know a lot about.I've known a lot about you and
(45:23):
that's why I like having people that I know on here.
You do have an interesting story.
You do have a very, you have a lot of wisdom behind you and you
don't know this from people thathave not been through the
fucking shit, don't have that shit.
They don't have that wisdom. They don't have that knowledge.
(45:44):
You know what I mean? You have to go through it a
little bit in order to have that.
It's like motivational speakers.This is why I like talking to
you is is when I talk to when I listen to a motivational speaker
that went to college paid for bytheir parents with very little
struggle. Don't.
I don't. I'm sure they help people, but I
(46:05):
don't relate. I relate to people that have
real things to say because they've experienced real stuff.
You know what I mean? What's up everybody?
September 27th is St. Vibes in Reno, NV and I don't
know about you guys, but I miss the way it used to be in
downtown Reno, bikes lining the streets.
It was an event and people wouldcome out.
Well, we're trying to bring thatback with the Baddest Little
(46:27):
Bike Show at Revision Brewery come out September 27th.
At Revision. We've got a FXR bagger, Club
style beat, gloss chopper, metric cars, vendors, trophies,
giveaways, surprise guests and more.
There is nowhere else to be on Saturday.
St. Vibes then Revision Brewing for
(46:49):
the Baddest Little Bike Show. Come check it out.
You know what I mean? Education lacks that.
Grit doesn't. It for sure it does.
It does. I relate more to it.
I want it's like a you don't go to a gym where everybody's fat.
You know what I mean? I want to tell me how to work
out, right. You sure, right.
I just, I want to know what you went through so I can go.
OK, Well, if I ever experience that, I know you know what I
(47:10):
mean, right. So you do have a lot of profound
wisdom, especially for being young.
Young. You are young.
I am not young. How old are you I'm.
Going to be 43. And you're not 43, dude.
OK, we'll just say 33. We'll just take 10 years off.
Are you doing St. vibrations or what are you going to do?
I don't know. I'm all, I haven't decided
(47:31):
whether I want to do any of thatright now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm all.
I think I'm just kind of doing the mom thing, relaxing, maybe
work on that biography. Yeah, I'm pretty sure that'll
probably kill my chances of everbeing a successful children's
author. Yeah.
No, seriously, my mom's going tobe mad.
Everybody I know, it's going to be like she.
(47:51):
Fucking did what? Yeah, yeah.
I'm going to be like, hey, whatever you heard about me,
believe it, it's true. Go back and read it again.
Wait till this one you get an agent and that one then put that
out. I know I'm going to have to find
separate. No tape backs, you know what I
mean? It is going to be a no tape
backs kind of thing. I'd be like, I'm really sorry.
Yeah, no, that's real. One of the other things I was
going to ask you was books you've read that have impacted
(48:16):
your life. What are some of the books that
you've read that have changed your way of thinking in your
life or had a profound impact onyour on your heart?
I would definitely say like the book that we were talking about
the other day, The Prey Naked. It's just a story of the pastor
for Summit Christian Church and his story with him and his wife
(48:38):
and their journey together and their relationship dynamic.
I believe it taught me forgiveness.
And a lot of things, whether that's with people,
relationships or just that peacebetween relationships and
marriage dynamics and relationships and partners.
So for me, I've always learned to be patient with people.
(49:01):
I'm always one to forgive and itjust kept my heart open to
understanding that everybody comes from all different walks
of life. So for me, I'm very religious as
far as like Christianity, I believe that, you know, that's a
very important piece for myself and for my family in order to be
the best version of myself that I can be for them as a parent.
(49:24):
I believe it's God then the family after.
So I think that what you pour into your cup, you know, with
your religion, then I think thatthat's what feeds and feels the
rest of your family. So reading that book was very
eye opening just to see how people are in other
relationships that you would look on outside and, you know,
(49:47):
you think, oh, this is perfect. This is what marriage looks
like. And we have some big belief that
everybody else's marriage is perfect.
And you know, they've had their downfalls and stuff as well.
So for me, it just kind of gave me an eye opening piece in order
to be able to forgive, especially being divorced, I
(50:08):
know a lot of people would be like, don't give him that grace.
Remember what he did or who he is.
But at the same time, that's still somebody that I loved at
one point, still the father of my children.
And no amount of anything that he's done, I have always given
him a space to be forgiven. And I always give him that
empathy and grace so. There's a lot of forgiveness
(50:28):
there. Yes.
So I think that humbled me as a person, so I'm at least
thankful. For that part of that book.
Yeah, I definitely am of the type of personal accountability
first, you know what I mean? And you know, we in in the
program, we try to live by this principle where it's absolute
(50:54):
and utter acceptance all the time.
You know what I mean? Like we cannot control other
people. And holding resentment is the
most toxic thing that I can do, you know what I mean?
And I do have friends like that.It's like where the world,
they'll hold, hold a grudge forever, man.
And that shit doesn't help, you know what I mean?
I do really thoroughly like the concept that you're talking
(51:15):
about as far as just radical acceptance, you know what I
mean? I think that is an important
thing. It's also fuck, who wants to
just be angry all the fucking time, you know?
What I mean, yeah. And it's so easy to let that
shit go. It's just hard to get there to
where you're willing to let it go.
You know what I mean? I.
Get that? But you got to think back to
(51:36):
we've all made our mistakes. We've all made poor decisions at
one point in our life. But depending on who the people
were that were surrounding us atthe time, somebody forgave us.
You know what I mean? We have been given second
chances, third chances to get everything right or at least try
and be a better version of ourself every day.
So somebody took that chance to give it to you, so why wouldn't
(51:59):
you give it to somebody else? You know what I mean?
And to have a type of hate in your heart for anybody is 1 Not
going to help you grow. You're just going to hold on to
a past, which means that you don't have that space to move
forward. So for me, I don't think that
that's something that I would want for myself or my children
to see is, oh, well, I'm still really mad at this person.
(52:21):
Like I'm not going to forgive them because then I didn't teach
them anything. So I think that you should
always try and move with that thought, that you should give
people that type of forgiveness and empathy that you would want
to swell. I totally agree.
And you touched on social media.That's that's yeah, I definitely
think like that Social media is crazy because you only see the
(52:48):
Johnson, the Joneses and the white fences and the absolute
best of whatever and it's and man, that's definitely something
that I've struggled with even inmy own relationship and just in
my life is to the point where I'm going to where I want other
people to do my social media. You know what I mean?
Because I'll look and like, man,I don't have the motorcycle that
(53:09):
guy has or I don't have the thing that that guy has or I I
definitely feel like that often.It's definitely something I've
I've struggled with and just forthe people listening to social
media isn't fucking real. You know what I mean?
No one's going to no one's goingto post their, you know, their
fight with their significant other and how they resolved it.
They're only going to, you're only going to see the absolute
(53:29):
best of of, of everybody on social media and it's just not
real. The Kardashians, the whatever,
it's the real shit happens behind the scenes.
When the camera's off. Right.
And you look, you, the where yougo look is what we're doing now.
Interviews with people who get to be candid, sitting on a chair
for an hour and a half, you knowwhat I mean?
And and you really see every everything about every.
(53:52):
Single emotion, yeah. You know, yeah, no, it's, it's
no, you're good. It's definitely something.
To me, social media is the same as drugs and alcohol.
It is a form of me needing to beaccepted.
It's a symptom of a larger problem.
(54:13):
Well, the one that we're moving forward and with our children.
And the new? Generations after.
Us Are you letting your kids have social media?
They have Instagram, but they'rejust watching reels.
And I was like, dude, I was like, this is going to dumb you
down. I was like, you can't spend all
day on this. I was all because it's not real.
I'm like, you need to be in the present and the here and the
now. And I was like, and they just
(54:34):
want to dumb you down anyways sowe can form to society and a
government system. Let's be real.
So I think that for me, you know, it's true.
What we see on social media isn't the raw, unfiltered,
unedited versions of people on aday-to-day basis and be like, Oh
my God, I am here and let's takea selfie.
(54:56):
But then 5 seconds later you're swatting your kid and you're
like, why'd you do that? But you were just on social
media being like, jeez. So it's not, it's not reality.
And if you have that much time to sit there and post all these
candid shots all day long, are you really living in reality
'cause you're taking that time away from your family and your
(55:18):
real day-to-day where you're taking that time and you're
sitting there, you're like, please go, go do something.
Mommy has to post. Yeah, that is crazy.
Like you're. Dismissing your child's needs or
potentially. Yeah, yeah, I'm I, and I've
definitely been guilty of that. Or just wanting to be mind
numbed instead of being a parent, you know what I mean?
Yeah, you're like in the five seconds of retardation.
(55:38):
Oh my God. In the rabbit hole, right?
Here and I'll catch myself and just be like damn that made me
feel like a derp. I give myself 5 to 10.
Minutes the. Kids are at school.
Yeah. For sure, I'm all other than
that I try not to 'cause I'm like, I don't have time for this
unless it's something for like book stuff.
But again, when they're in school, that's when I feel it's
(55:59):
acceptable for me because then they're getting the rest of my
time. So I don't really post on social
media unless it's something for book, but other than that,
Alaska does a lot of the postingand stuff like that.
For all of my book stuff. I'm like, bless her soul, she
does it way better than me. Badass.
Yeah. Well, Jackie, thank you so much
(56:19):
for coming on. Jackie's book will be available
on the Spotify links and the YouTube links underneath.
Where can they? Can people find you on social
media? You said your website.
Where else? Oh, like as far as social media,
you got Jacqueline Rhodes rights, and that's on Facebook.
Jacqueline Rhodes words. I believe that's Instagram.
(56:41):
And then you had a YouTube. Channel as well I do Jacqueline
Rhodes on YouTube. That's it.
Yeah. All right.
We'll tag your socials on everything.
We really appreciate you being here.
Thank you for having me.
This is Jacob, the host of the 4th St.
Live podcast, and my new book, The Rail Runner, inspired by my
life on the railroad and being arailroad contractor, is now for
sale on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.
Please go check out my new storyif you're looking to escape
reality for a few hours. It's a great read.
Support a local Reno author. Thanks so much.
(01:18):
So it's like 1 you have to dresslike APTA mom.
The other one you have to dress like every man's fucking wet
fantasy. OK, I think I fulfilled that on
both ends. Because it's lady in public
fucking the Punisher. But isn't isn't PTA mom what I.
(01:40):
Think so cuz it's the all American dream.
Like when I started working there, Jim was like OK, well
what I really want from you is the girl next door.
He's like, this is exactly it. You'll do.
Cuz I was like, can I be a dancer?
We need to talk about this. When was that?
I think it was four years ago. Got it.
I called him and was like, can Ibe a stripper?
Yeah. He's like, nobody's seen you in
(02:02):
10 years. Sick.
We're going to have to have a chat about this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I met him and he saw me and
he's. Oh yeah.
Yeah, girl next door. Yeah, but I think that's pretty
much like, you know, like when you're married, your husband
expects you to be a lady in public, but then you're supposed
to be a slut. In the bedroom.
In the bedroom. So it's like kind of like a.
Yeah, you want to. Balance that.
(02:22):
So I think being an author and then being a dancer.
I know the what do you call it? The the conundrum, I guess,
because I biker not supposed to be an author, right?
You know what I mean, Or it's not a common thing.
And it was like, I like smashingthose kind of stereotypes.
(02:43):
I like being able to say fuck eloquently and not being able
not worried about. I don't know that I'm not
fitting the social norm. I didn't go to college, you know
what I mean? And whatever, and I'm still just
as capable. I don't know.
I think that that was the big thing for me.
I think that comes with, you know, you're not stereotypical
(03:04):
if you really think about it. Like, how many strippers do you
know that I've actually published a book?
I only know one. As long as she's like 60
something years old, I'm gonna bless her soul for still going
through it. But at the same time, it's like
you're not really that demographic to be like, oh, you
could be an author like Nate being like, you can be
president. Oh, fucking thanks, Nathaniel,
for believing in me so much. I love that.
(03:25):
Here's your copy. But it's.
Yeah, I don't know. So I have to go an in betweeny.
Whatever. I did my Barnes and Noble book
signing and what ended up happening as I posted the video
in LinkedIn and the lady from I guess Goodles Noodles, one of
their CE OS reached out on my LinkedIn body, shamed me for
(03:47):
being chesty in a sun dress. And if she would have seen me
outside in the public at a Barnes and Noble for a book
signing with her six year old, she would have turned around and
walked out. And I was just like.
So your body shaming me because I'm big trusted in a sun dress.
I was like, but if I was a stickfigure, you wouldn't body shame
me and you'd be like, Oh my gosh, I would love to get a book
(04:09):
from you. Yeah, this this person looks
like an author. Yeah, but.
This one I'll buy a book from. Yeah.
So it's kind of like. That hard space between being,
you know, looking the way that Ido and also being an author,
it's like most people don't takeyou seriously anyways, so I had
done a video. Reach Out with Alaska helped me
and when we did that, we did like this whole reach out.
(04:33):
It was during the Sidney Sweeneything where you know, don't like
her in jeans, you know, 'cause it's.
Blue eyed, blonde hair, stereotypical.
That's what men want, you know that's.
What sells? I mean, so Alaska and I did a
reach out video during the same time that Sidney Sweeney got
shamed at the same time for being busty in a pair of jeans
and a open blouse top. So for me it was the same thing
(04:57):
is I understood how she felt. So I did not reach video and I
was like OK well. You know what, like I will still
be taken seriously no matter what I look like.
I was like, women don't come in one-size-fits-all categories.
We are all different shapes and sizes and there's somebody for
everybody. And if my chest is offensive to
you, I was like, that's something for you to sit with.
That is wild. And so I put that out there and
(05:20):
the worst part about it, it was one of the CE OS from Goodles
Noodles and their sogo is women empowering women.
And I was like, not really, but really, yeah.
Really. That is funny.
I've I and is that kid that is going to pick up that book going
to give a fuck? You know what I mean?
No. That's the worst part is you
just told him I was good for onething, when you saw me.
(05:42):
Yeah. Stereotyped me and left the
room. I was like, yeah.
But you just. Taught him that I was
incompetent enough to write a. Book so empowering women, but
you have to look like a nerd. Let me just not wash my face,
throw my hair in a messy bun in sweatpants then would you have
thought for me? That's bullshit and I'm sorry
that happened. But also there's something to be
(06:06):
said about, I don't know, the state of the world.
I guess you know what I mean? I really do believe that there's
the empower people. Empowering people is just the
most important thing right now. I'm not supposed to be.
I don't look like an author. One of the hardest things I've
dealt with also is being a new author who doesn't have a
(06:27):
college background. My writing style is not the same
as anyone else's writing style, which I want, you know what I
mean? My, my guy is Cormac McCarthy,
who wrote No Country for Old Men, that's who like I look up
to. And I wanted to write like him,
Westerny, you know, and like kind of noir and, you know, like
(06:48):
same deal as everybody that I'vedealt with was like, I just
don't know where to put you, youknow what I mean?
And that's been kind of a thing.So I definitely know.
And you have an agent. Are you working on getting an
agent? I'm still working on it.
I've sent over 6060 queries out already and it is.
It's the hardest thing, especially for picture books and
(07:09):
for children's literary agents, I guess are the hardest ones for
you to actually find versus likewhether you're doing fiction or
non fiction, you're doing a novel or it's a thriller.
Most literary agents, they have what type of book that they're
looking for, whether what their categories are and to fit in a
category of a picture book is the hardest one to find.
(07:31):
That's what I've ran into anyways.
It's just always, OK, well, we'll just try the next one.
I mean, I did get great feedback.
By one of these literary agents.She is in New York, and she has.
Multibillion dollar literary agency and she said good luck.
This is a great book and I really think that it's needed.
So, you know, hope that you're able to find the right
(07:53):
children's literary agent. So you know that coming for some
from somebody of her status and her background and what she
does, I think that speaks volumes for me just because of
the fact that means that someoneout there is going to be like.
Oh, this one. This book because they see the
potential that it has, especially for, you know, the
(08:15):
type of book that it is, for it to be released and be the first
of its kind for its demographic,for kindergarteners through 6th
graders, for PTSD and wildfires.That's not something that's
heard of, especially something that's not graphic in images to
where it's going to startle and traumatize a child because there
is another book that's out therethat has been written from this
(08:36):
artist in Paradise, CA. But the only problem is the
detail in the photos and the illustration is so traumatizing.
At the time when I had seen it and Christina was probably like
6 or 7 and still having outbursts and stuff like that
due to, you know, what he had seen.
I was like, if I read this to him, Oh my God.
I can only imagine the amount oftrauma that he is going to go
(08:57):
through and then relive through such vivid imaging.
So that's what scared me to evenpick that one up where this one
is soft, the edges are rounded. Even though that it has, you
know, the fire through one of the pages on there, it's just
enough to touch on the subject to trigger, trigger an emotion
in order for a child to express their emotions freely.
(09:19):
For me, when I wrote this, I honestly wrote it for my boys
when they were five and eight atthe time and I was working as
APTA mom, volunteering my time in the.
School 'cause that's what we do.In the middle of nowhere.
So I was PTA mom volunteering inthe classroom and I worked part
(09:40):
time senior care and after the fire I was working with the
school psychologist, you know, just because you know, my
children have special needs and and I was like, do we have any
resources for natural disasters such as wildfires?
Any pamphlets, anything? And he's like, I'm sorry,
Jackie, I got nothing. And I was like, you're a
psychologist, you should have something so.
(10:01):
And where were you living beforeyou moved here?
Before I moved back here to Reno.
I was living in Paradise, CA. Nice.
California. Yeah.
And we're going to get into the book itself, but first I'd like
to talk about you a little bit and growing and, and being in
Paradise, CA. What had you moved to Paradise,
(10:23):
CA? Did you like it?
And how did you, why did you move back to Reno, you know?
OK so for me, I moved to Paradise, CA when I wanted to
change from Reno. I had work service industry for
a really long time, you know, being in my 20s and stuff like
that and I kind of want to change.
I married my boyfriend at the time right before we left.
(10:44):
Then we plan to have another baby.
So we were pregnant, we wanted anew start and we decided that
that would be the best area. It was closer to some of his
family. So when we went out there, we
were like, oh, it's really pretty out here.
And it was outside of Chico, so it wasn't really like that party
town feel. It was more mellow, laid back,
(11:05):
community base, all the parents were in the classroom and stuff
like that. So that's kind of what I wanted
for my kids is they would have asafer, more comfortable space
for them to adjust. And so that's why I moved there.
And then I moved back here to Reno.
Leave 2021 and going through divorce I'm on, which was a
(11:25):
really rough patch for me. But at the same time, it's
growth, it's change for the bestfor my children.
But also I couldn't keep my children in Paradise, CA after
the fire. And every year we had a fire
that would come through our cityabout 9 miles from our property.
So when your children are wakingup in the middle of the night
(11:47):
and they can smell smoke or you have ash going through your
house and blowing around outsideand the kids can smell it, it
wakes them up. Or running on a generator.
That type of trauma does, does just doesn't go away.
It's like a reoccurring trauma. So you sometimes you can't heal
in the same places that made yousick.
So for me, I just did what was best for them.
(12:09):
It was something that I needed to do so then I wouldn't always
be in fight or flight. And better, better mental health
for myself and for my children. And which fire was it?
That was the last one that was likely to get the fuck out of
here. It was the.
Dixie Fire, It was 9 miles from the house.
We ended up getting up in the middle of the night and there
(12:30):
was ash and ember and it was flying all over the property and
down the street. I mean, it honestly looked like
it was snowing. It was just coming towards you.
And yeah, they shut the cell towers off.
They shut off the power. And so you're running on a
generator and there's no way to check and see what's going on in
the town. So you can imagine leaving your
(12:50):
kids and then having to go down the street.
So you have enough cell service.So then you can check on
Facebook and see what's going onin the town of Paradise.
You're like, OK, do we need to evacuate or are we going to
stay? But when minutes only count in
the type of space that we've been put in before with a
campfire, you don't have that kind of time to just go down the
street and be like, oh, well, you know, 5 minutes doesn't
(13:11):
matter. But in order to have some sort
of service, then that's what we had to do.
And then by the time we got there, they were like, oh, it's
not an evacuation order, it's anevacuation warning.
But then outside, surrounding areas are under an order and
you're like, OK, so you get the kids up in the middle of the
night and then they can see behind the grocery store and off
(13:32):
in the mountain that there's fire and your kids like you.
Have to pee? And you're stuck in traffic and
he's peeing on the side of the road and he's shaking and going.
You don't want to die. I'm like, it's OK.
So you can imagine all that typeof trauma that they're going
through, and to stay in an environment like that, it's not
(13:53):
going to help them heal. So that's what forced all the
change for me to move. It's like, Nope.
That one was the worst because Igrew up in my summers
lifeguarding at Almanor and there was a camp up there just
up into the mountains past Chester, CA right.
(14:14):
And I literally my it's like my childhood, right from the time I
think I was 11 to the time I waseven 17.
I spent every summer of my life lit sleeping in this camp in up
in the middle of by Chester and that Dixie fire wiped out that
camp, wiped out my childhood, you know what I mean?
And it was it was like and Chester still doesn't even look
(14:35):
the same, you know, like that whole town, like the I think
it's the West southwest part of Almanor.
It still doesn't look like the same thing.
You know what I mean? That one was that one was crazy
and it was going forever. You know what I mean?
What caused that one? Do they know?
I can't remember looking back onit, it was a while ago I.
(14:57):
I was going. To say I think it was power
lines. A lot of the things that we find
is even with the campfires, theydidn't report it soon enough.
So whenever you have a spark andsomething falls on the ground,
as we learned, then it's going to cause a fire.
Especially there, especially with the winds and the Darbo Gap
and everything that goes through, you know, in the
mountains back there, it's way too windy for them to be able to
(15:17):
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St. life. Thanks so much and so how did
you deal with it just as a parent before this idea for this
(16:03):
book and the conception of this book.
How did you go with it as a parent with?
Your kids. Winged it as a parent.
That's what we do, right? We were displaced after the fire
here in Reno. We stayed.
At I'm trying to think of the name of the hotel.
It's right there in legends. It's going to say Hilton Suites
or something like that. At the Legends Mall, Yeah, the
Marriott right there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
(16:24):
So we were back there and you know, obviously we knew that our
house was burnt down, everybody lost their property.
So there was all of these different changes and we
couldn't get them in counseling soon enough.
And then when we did, it was more like a court ordered
situation for families. So it wasn't the right fit for
us. The children were non responsive
(16:46):
and it was just consistently battling meltdowns.
Camden hiding in the bathroom. Once we finally did get him re
enrolled into school out here atVan Gorder.
And then his little brother would just stop in the middle of
the room anywhere and just scream.
And the most that you can do is give them grace for the things
that they're going through and being like, if I can manage my
(17:10):
emotions and my feelings to the best of my abilities, but it's
still hard for me as an adult, you can only imagine being five
and eight years old and trying to manage your emotions.
And that's what we're going to get, right?
So giving them that grace and that space to just be like, I
understand how you feel, kid. If it was socially acceptable, I
would do that too. But as a parent, the most you
(17:32):
can do is just show up and console them.
But yeah, I know counseling was working.
So it was just. Comfort in providing them just
that space in order to have thatmoment and then be there.
Comfort them and start back over.
Yeah, that's all you can do. No.
And it's a lot of, it's a lot ofthings happening at once too in
your life, which is wild. And that's.
(17:53):
Yeah, you know, where are we going to live, right?
How am I going to cook in this hotel?
California. Not California.
Fuck you knew Zoom. Yeah, the climate change and all
their crap that they wanted to blame it on was absolutely
asinine. Yeah, it just came down to them
not allowing them to go in thereand trim the trees, right?
You know what I mean? It's like such a simple thing,
(18:15):
right? Well, some of that, but a lot of
it, it just wasn't reported. I'm sure there's underlying
reasons of why the town burnt down.
We'll never really know, but I'msure that just comes down to
premeditated situations. Yeah, well, Reno's glad to have
you back, dude. I'm happier here than there.
I don't always feel like something's going to catch on
(18:36):
fire, not always in a consistentstate of fight or flight.
So my nervous system has calmed down a lot since being here.
Same with my kids. They're adjusted now, so.
So what gave you the idea for the conception of this book,
this children's story? Honestly, after all of the work
and going back to paradise, I volunteered in the classroom
(18:58):
with A teacher that I was reallygood friends with and one of the
other grandparents. And after watching all the
things that the kids were going through was really, really hard.
The environment and the things and the stressors that they were
going through was non-stop. Just seeing the grief in their
(19:20):
faces and just all the traumas that the boys were going
through. I was like, I can't just sit
and. Go with the idea of the school
psychologist telling me, oh, we have no resources.
OK, well, we're going to make one.
I don't care if I write this thing down in a spiral notebook
because that's what I did as a mother.
And I sat there and I wrote thisbook sitting on my bed while the
(19:44):
kids were at school one day. And it took me about a week to
finish. And then one day I ended up
sitting down with them and I read it to them and it was the
craziest thing is it was just ina spiral notebook.
It didn't have pictures. It didn't have anything except
for words. And the first thing out of my
(20:07):
child's mouth. Christian was 6, I believe.
Yeah, about 6. Fuck PG&E.
Yeah, that's hilarious. So for a little tiny child to
say that, I gave him that space and I was like, that's the only
time you were allowed to say it,that word.
So I wasn't mad. I didn't care because that's how
(20:28):
I felt too. But then my other son was like
from the PlayStation back, burned my house down.
Just reading all of that to themstarted a conversation not only
for them to strike up questions.What made them mad?
Their losses, their concerns. So for me, as a parent, I was
(20:49):
like, well damn. That's more than we got out of
them. In counseling.
So I was like, OK, And so I justwent with it and I just kept
reading the book to them. So the kids volunteering in the
school and my boys were my main reason to write this book was to
give them some sort of peace or at least be able to understand
(21:10):
what their emotions were and howthey were feeling.
So then I could address it and be the best version of their
parent. You know, in order to help them,
because nothing else was going to except for me.
No, that's real. And what was that creative
process like that that week longcreative process?
Was it just you had a thought, you started writing?
Is that kind of just? Oh it literally just float out
(21:32):
of me. I changed a couple words here
and there, but I literally had it written down the first two
days and then after that was just adjusting it, moving pages.
And yeah, I had no struggles, nonothing with.
This it's your medium. Did you handwrite?
Oh yeah. Got it full on paper, no I.
(21:52):
Can't. I can't read my handwriting,
otherwise I'd do that, but I totally.
The children's book It is an easy read, so kindergarteners
through 6 cutters a little easier to write for.
For sure, yeah, my mom calls that feeling the call to create,
you know what I mean? And it's real, it's a real
fucking thing. And it's funny 'cause everyone
gets that feeling and not a lot of only artists are usually the
(22:13):
ones that listen to that. And my mom calls that.
And I, my whole life I didn't really have it until funny
enough that I started working onmotorcycles and building
motorcycles, you know what I mean?
And customizing motorcycles. And I'd look at something and
I'd be like, it's just not right, you know what I mean?
And and I didn't know what that feeling was for a long time.
(22:33):
And my mom finally was like, no,that's the call.
This call to create is call to deuce.
I was like, fuck it is. And it's crazy because that
feeling eats away at me if I don't listen to it now.
Exactly. I'm same.
That's how I wrote the second book that I wrote.
I literally wrote it in less than 24 hours.
I started it at work and then I was like, OK, I went off early
(22:56):
because I'm going to go home andfinish it and I finished it
within an hour when I got home. So I know how that is.
It's like it's a pull. It's.
A creative pull. And if you don't let it out,
then it's like you're completelyoff because you know that you're
not doing what you're intended to do.
And I feel like that's divine purpose.
At least that's how I feel. That's how I feel too.
(23:16):
I feel like it's a gift that, you know, I'm sure you feel the
same way that you have inside ofyou and you're supposed to share
it. And if you don't share it, or
you don't finish or accomplish, then you're not doing what
you're called to do. Yeah, no, I feel like that with
with like I even feel with, I'llget that feeling with like
renovations in my house. I do renovations in my house
like a nut job, but I'll get that feeling.
(23:38):
Well, I'll like look up at something and I'll be like, that
doesn't look right. And then I spend the fucking day
knocking a wall down with John, my producer, you know what I
mean? Or something, you know, we just,
I just, I do get that feeling. And if there's anybody listening
that gets a feeling it's OK to not know what the fuck you're
doing. It's not OK to just not do it
(23:58):
though. Create and the same as you did
not have any background writing except for maybe a freshman high
school literary class. You know what I'm saying?
You're. Like, but that was.
Forced for sure it was and it was and I had to think back to
that and man, I don't my grammar, everything, dude, it
was it was it was a it was a muscle I had to kind of reignite
(24:22):
in my life. You know what I mean?
I do. Know what that's like?
Yeah, It's like, OK, when we were put in school and we had to
do this, it was like, not the right subject or you're like,
I'm bored. But then when it's something
that you're passionate about, it's going to come out and it's
just going to flow. It's not something that you have
to really think about here and there, like changing a word or a
(24:44):
sentence here and there, checking your spelling.
I'm always just crazy publish authors and we ought to check
our spelling. Yeah, for sure.
Somebody else checks everybody else's spelling.
I think, and I think my spellinggot checked like 7 times.
Then I ran it through what is itGrammarly, like twice, you know
what I mean? And then there was like before I
published, I had to make sure that it that now there's like
(25:06):
people writing books with AI. So I had to run it through AI so
people know I didn't write it, run it with AI.
You know what I mean? There's like a bunch of there's
a bunch of stuff involved with that.
And yeah, no, that's I appreciate people following that
call or whatever that call to create.
That's the people I want to talkto.
Those are the people that I knowhave done something and just
(25:27):
listen to whatever. And that's like you said, it's
divine. I think it's something telling
you to do something, you know, so, so now run us through the
story a little bit. Give us a a synopsis of start to
finish. Start to finish.
So it's kind of a journey of howeverything went for us, though
(25:48):
it starts off with obviously thetown of Paradise and everybody
being happy. And it's all children base.
They have their little Nick niche, they're all happy,
they're comfortable in their space.
It's, you know, surreal, like where we lived.
So every place that we would go is very well known to the
(26:11):
children in our community. So everything through the book
is all places that actually exist in Paradise, CA.
So it goes from the parks to theschool to even us being
displaced and telling children that it's going to be OK.
That changes, you know, something that everybody's going
(26:33):
to go through in this type of situation, whether that's
leaving and then moving, starting a new school.
Some people being able to move back into the community after a
rebuild of the school is what I did in here.
Showing real images that were captured by the illustrator, you
know, in his artwork to a tee onhow he did everything for the
(26:57):
illustrations. So it literally just goes
through the change and the growth and the strength and
resilience through the book, andthen some of the children moving
back into the community and going back to being with their
friends or making new friends. So that's kind of what he did
with this book, is showing all the growth and change that
children are going to go throughbased off of the traumatic event
(27:20):
and showing them that it's OK tofeel these feelings and these
types of emotions and that everybody else is going through
this type of change as well. It wasn't just something that
was happening only to them, so then they knew that they weren't
alone in what they were going through.
So that's what I did with this. Oh, that's a beautiful thing.
And after you've published this story, was it?
(27:47):
I know you've sold quite a few copies.
I know you're on. You're on Barnes and Noble,
Amazon. What else are you on?
I. Have my own website,
jacquelinerhodesrights.com and then also on YouTube.
And then, yeah, so we're trying to get it more going in other
directions as well. Still a pain.
As you know with that query it's.
(28:08):
A it's a lot. And I also think that like the
less I focus on how the more good seems to come and I just
kind of I do, but that doesn't mean don't send letters and try
and do it and try and do that. But it just means I just I'm
more focused on the process and not wearing so much just me
(28:31):
personally, you know what I mean?
And goodwill come. It's just all that's just how
it's worked for me so far. But I do know what you mean.
And this is definitely somethingthat's a powerful thing.
And Reno authors is a you were in paradise, but you're a Reno
person. So the people in paradise, what
is their take? Is it?
(28:51):
Was it received well from your old community?
Through the community when I didthe Chocolate Festival, yes.
And then I had a lot of other, believe it or not, teachers that
would come up to me. And they're like, you have to
get this book into Hawaii. You need to get this book into
Pasadena for the LA Fire. And, you know, they're reaching
out to our community because they've never been through
(29:13):
something like this. And with us going through this
already, you know, this would bea great resource for, you know,
their staff and for the childrento have.
And so that's what I've been working on right now.
So I have donated books to Lahaina.
I have donated books to Palisades, and then I'm donating
books to Pasadena this week as well.
(29:34):
So doing my best. So I try not to get.
Discouraged on it, I just go where Yeah, my heart and God
tells me to go with this, no. That's what I've been doing.
And like you said, this is a resource, this is a tool because
it's such a a lot of parents. I think the one of the strongest
qualities of a parent is it crazy.
Shit happens in life. And the testament to, in my
(29:59):
opinion, really great parents istheir ability to handle trauma
with their kids or things that have happened with their kids
instead of doing nothing or pretending like it's not a
problem 'cause that doesn't fix anything.
That exacerbates the issue. And I think that what's cool
about this is it translates so well not just to kids that have
(30:25):
been experienced natural disasters, but anything else,
you know what I mean? It's just, hey, this happened to
us and this is how we dealt withit.
And there there is a happy ending.
You know what I mean? There is a positive at the end.
Shit does re get grow back and rebuild and it's OK.
And this is sad and it's out of your control.
(30:45):
And that's life. And it's there's a, there's
quite a few powerful key lessonsin this for me that I really
enjoyed, which was, yeah, just like, hey, shit happens.
It sucks feeling out of control.Life isn't fair sometimes.
But this is what can come of that.
Look at the look at the community up there now, closer
than ever, you know, and. Outreach that the community is
(31:09):
able to do with all the other places that have been affected
by wildfires. Right, and shed light on the
problem. There is a problem.
It's. A major problem for California
I'm all as they're learning and I don't think that you know this
is going to be the last wildfire.
Obviously we're just going through a new beginning with
that type of situation through California with fires and
(31:31):
wildfires all over. Well, it's pretty traumatizing.
I, you know, for the adults, butit's really hard for the
children. I'm all, and sometimes we have
to step out of our own space of trauma and remember that they're
little and they don't know how to get through that.
And we're the ones that have to lead.
Sometimes you have to take a minute from yourself and be
(31:52):
selfless and go, OK, what do we do next?
And the feedback that I've gotten.
From this book. Has been quite amazing,
especially for one of the stories that I was told on.
I was going to say Mike's LittleGirl.
She's I want to say 5 or 6. And she read the book and hadn't
(32:14):
been through anything like this.And she was like, have you heard
about the story of Paradise Dad?Oh my gosh.
It has a really sad middle, but it has a great ending.
But the questions that came fromthat was like, why did this
happen? Are they going to rebuild?
Like asking your dad like all these different questions and
inquiring was a great thing because even if you haven't gone
(32:38):
through this as a child, you're still going to have questions.
And then it's going to give you that knowledge.
Like say you have another child that comes in your classroom and
has gone through it. And another child just reading
this book would understand the type of feelings that they have
in that situation. So it gives them empathy towards
other kids that have gone through that type situation in
(32:59):
that space. It's hard it.
Is and yeah, like some kids are never going to know what that
was, you know what I mean? So it does, like you just said,
it gives them an opportunity to familiarize themselves with why
your kid was so upset. They'll never know, you know
what I mean? But they can read the story and
identify. Have you been back there since?
(33:20):
Yes. So I went out for the Paradise
Chocolate Festival and then I went out for a Paradise party in
the park and that was before 4thof July.
And then I did a news interview out there two days before 4th of
July. Yeah.
So I've been out there a couple times.
Is. It the same.
No, it's not the same. It's not as hard for me to go
(33:42):
through there anymore because the growth has come back quite a
bit, so you don't see as many tree stumps.
And it's not as hard to be around 'cause when I first went
there it just gave me anxiety and kind of made it feel like I
couldn't breathe. And I was like, OK, we need to
leave. We're here.
We saw goodbye. But with the greenery that's
growing back, it's at least a sense of, you know, hope and
(34:07):
hopefully we can make it something close to what it was
before. But I honestly don't know.
It's not as many people that live there now as before.
So it's still, for me, very hard.
Very hard, yes. You had a book signing at Barnes
and Noble. Tell us what that was like.
(34:27):
Oh my gosh, it was so much fun. I did my book signing in Reno,
and I think that it was a littlequiet 'cause there was a giant
rainstorm that day. But the type of traction that we
got from it was a lot of moms, couple firefighters.
And so there was just people coming up and inquiring about
(34:49):
the book. What was it about?
Oh my gosh, that's paradise CA. I can't believe that like, you
were there, you survived. And I was like, yeah, so what's
a book about? Oh, it's a book for my children.
So I don't know. I really enjoyed doing it.
It was a lot of fun. I was there with the illustrator
as well. He just thought it was amazing
(35:11):
how far we've come with it. And being able to do a Barnes
and Noble, Barnes and Noble booksigning was something that I was
very passionate about. Like this is it, this is going
to be so much fun. Like All authors as you know,
like you'd just be tickled. Just be like, oh, I've made it
this far. Like I'm signing books now.
Look. So I think the best part for me
(35:33):
was when the moms would come up and they'd.
Be like, Oh my gosh, I love you're going to take it to the
register and go check out. And their kids, we did print out
coloring pages. And so the kids were all there
and they were coloring the pictures from actual images
inside the book. And they're like, no, we don't
want to go to the register. And I was like, they can't stay
here in color. Oh, wow, you're such a mom,
(35:55):
dude. I'm a hell yeah.
My wife has those like every time we go anywhere.
And the kids, she has these things that the kids can just
fucking color. What do you call it's like these
poodle pad? No, it's, it's like these little
leather patches that they can color and you can wipe them off.
I don't know. But she's a, she's a mom like
you. And she just is always pulling
(36:15):
shit out like like we have stuffin our purse because when I
leave the house, we leave the house, we're in and out in 5
minutes. And I'm like, why the fuck takes
everybody so long to get out of the house?
And it's that it's because you're bringing everything that
I just don't care, you know whatI mean?
So. We're preventative.
You're a mom. We don't.
Want to hear? Screaming, we don't want them to
be like, Oh my God, they don't have this and they need it.
(36:35):
Or something happens, it goes wrong and you needed it and you
don't have it for sure. So it's always a mom.
That's mom life for sure. So you talked a little bit
earlier about some of the backlash you received and it had
nothing to do with the story. And that's what's crazy.
So I let's talk about some thosekind of things that you were
(36:58):
dealing with because it is insane to me.
One of the large one of the likeI just said, one of the biggest
things I dealt with was people. I'm for be first.
Being a first time author is always tabooed at any publicist
publishing company. It's like nobody wants to touch
(37:19):
a first time author. It's like, it's like, so I
should have been writing since Iwas 18 and I should have 55
novels. And it's like there's a lot of
insecurity and I approach everything in my life the way I
do being a biker is I don't givea fuck what you think, you know
what I mean? And so that has actually gotten
me a lot better in that cause like, dude, you're a nerd, just
(37:41):
fucking publish my shit, you know what I mean?
So it, that mentality has been alot better 'cause it's like, I
just don't care. This is a, it's like telling
Banksy not saying I'm fucking Jesus Christ.
It's like telling Banksy that that's not art, you know what I
mean? It's like, nobody can fucking
tell you shit, you know? And there's an audience for
everything. But I'm sure there's other
(38:05):
people who are similar to you, maybe have the same job as you,
or just are the same kind of mentality as you.
Mom, that doesn't give a fuck what you think, you know what I
mean? That might be afraid to put
things out there. What would you say to those
people? Honestly, I think for me, I
(38:26):
haven't been taken seriously forthe way that I look, my body
shape. Yeah, it must be hard having
your obviously physical disadvantages of the world you.
Definitely have to dress certainways to be socially acceptable.
But you know, I've kind of gone this far.
I'm like, you know, everybody has a different body shape.
(38:50):
We are not A1 size fits all. I'm not here to make you
comfortable because you're uncomfortable with my body.
I am fully clothed, covered. I have been body shamed.
And even if you're not, who gives a fuck?
That's what I hate. You know, with everything
showing like that is definitely not me.
I am totally a lady. But if I want to wear a sun
(39:12):
dress, sun dress and you're going to tell me that there's
something wrong because I'm too busty or curvy to wear a sun
dress when I'm fully clevered. And you want to body shame me
and tell me that I can't be taken seriously as an author.
That's when you need to reflect and think about the things that
are wrong inside yourself beforeyou would even body shame
another woman. I do not believe on woman hate
(39:34):
crime. Like that's not me.
If you want to wear that, go forit.
If you're comfortable in your own skin, that's a good thing.
That's how we should be. Yeah, no, that's real.
My, my, my wife got her. I got her an augmentation last
year and it's funny because she's had some she can wear
whatever she wants, whenever shewants because I can fight so I
(39:55):
don't care. So I don't.
And me saying like, you know, don't wear that out is to me.
I just don't give a fuck, you know what I mean?
And it's definitely been like that where ever since then she's
had like the sneaker. I'm like, what the fuck?
And my wife is the kind of girl that will be like we're out and
you look great in that out, you know what I mean?
(40:17):
And like, that's something I think is.
Is important is like that women value and women women kind of
thing and building them up. I'm not a woman.
I don't know what you guys go through.
I have no idea you know what I mean, but.
It's hard. It's hard especially when you're
trying to enter a professional line of business, especially as
you know, being an author, beingtaken seriously and to be
(40:40):
comfortable in your own skin or to be able to speak freely, be
in public, be in a public setting.
Am I wearing the right thing? Is this going to be acceptable?
But then at a certain point you just have to remember that we're
all human and honestly, fuck anybody that tells you that
there's something wrong with your body because we're all made
(41:02):
differently. And it's not like I'm supposed
to make you comfortable. If you're uncomfortable because
I have a big chest, I'm sorry that makes you uncomfortable.
I'm uncomfortable in the fact that you're.
Uncomfortable. You're even thinking about it.
Yeah. And we're just talking to me
like a person. Yeah, I'm like don't, but don't
devalue me based on how I look. And that's even.
(41:25):
Yeah. I think that that's the same
thing for even just being a pretty girl.
That's a hard thing too, yeah. I'm all so it's a lot of.
Different factors, yeah. Other people's opinions of me
are none of my business. Yeah.
And it doesn't provide or give me any value that has to come
from yourself a little bit. You know what I mean?
And 100% it's like people that have the most to say and the
(41:48):
most opinions are usually the ones who are the most insecure
about whatever they got going oneither aesthetically, which is
it happens. But it's also the loudest people
in the room truly are the weakest people in the room.
And those are the ones that are missing something from their
life, don't have a calmness in their heart when they wake up in
the morning like those people. I like we have this thing in a,
(42:12):
a where you, you feel bad, we feel bad for those people.
You know what I mean? I genuinely didn't get that at
first. I didn't get the people that are
angry all the time and mad all the time and you just want to be
angry back. I genuinely understand now what
they were talking about where you feel sorry for those people
because those people are obviously missing something from
their lives. And they, it doesn't provide me
(42:32):
any value. The only value I have is what I
do. And the other thing too is if
there's one person or one kid orone parent that has read your
story and had some semblance of peace or even nostalgia, you've,
you've achieved your goal, even if it's just one, you know what
(42:52):
I mean? And more than one is read it.
So, so you've definitely achieved what you're trying to
do, regardless of what anybody thinks about it.
That's how I feel. And that is that is a real, real
thing. Is there more books to come,
something different? Is it just was this an inspiring
thing and I? Kind of started a little effect.
(43:13):
So I have already started another book.
It's finished. It's already sketched out for
illustration. It's a book on hurricanes.
So it's called Look here Hurricane.
It's just about an extremely ambitious child that wants to be
helpful with his father in orderto help him prepare for a
hurricane that's coming and the change that comes along with it.
(43:36):
And then the following up of devastation.
But then still giving that pieceof hope and resilience through
the bravery of the child and theelement of distraction.
But he carries around like this little teddy bear, that's the
emotional peace through the story.
So the teddy bear feels the emotion where the child's just
(43:56):
extremely ambitious. And it's like, oh, we're fine,
you know? But it shows the resilience, you
know, and the bravery and, you know, the change and the
aftermath, but then still the peace and the hope afterwards.
So it is the second book that I wrote.
It's already done, we just need to get it illustrated.
But we're on a hold because I'm still moving this and still
(44:19):
trying to do the literary agent direction with this book.
So being able to do that first would be one of the things that
would help me finish the second one.
Yeah, have you? And that's a kid story as well.
It is got you another kindergarten through 6th grade
easy read book. Have you thought about writing
long form? Is it something you thought
about? Honestly, the longest thing that
(44:41):
I'm gonna be writing is when I put together my biography.
Cool. So I think that's gonna be 1 of
the rawest things for me. But you write my biography and
I'll write yours. There you go, dude.
OK, the T we have to still to get here.
My shit's gonna be crazy. Amal, do you really want to
know? My Dirty Little secrets and T.
OK, sure. And then just change everybody's
(45:03):
name. OK, deal, deal.
You don't have to change my names.
No cops can read your shit. But OK, yeah, there might be a
couple things that they're probably not going to be able to
read mine. No, sorry mom.
Mine's not that interesting. It's too short.
Yours, yours I know a lot about.I've known a lot about you and
(45:23):
that's why I like having people that I know on here.
You do have an interesting story.
You do have a very, you have a lot of wisdom behind you and you
don't know this from people thathave not been through the
fucking shit, don't have that shit.
They don't have that wisdom. They don't have that knowledge.
(45:44):
You know what I mean? You have to go through it a
little bit in order to have that.
It's like motivational speakers.This is why I like talking to
you is is when I talk to when I listen to a motivational speaker
that went to college paid for bytheir parents with very little
struggle. Don't.
I don't. I'm sure they help people, but I
(46:05):
don't relate. I relate to people that have
real things to say because they've experienced real stuff.
You know what I mean? What's up everybody?
September 27th is St. Vibes in Reno, NV and I don't
know about you guys, but I miss the way it used to be in
downtown Reno, bikes lining the streets.
It was an event and people wouldcome out.
Well, we're trying to bring thatback with the Baddest Little
(46:27):
Bike Show at Revision Brewery come out September 27th.
At Revision. We've got a FXR bagger, Club
style beat, gloss chopper, metric cars, vendors, trophies,
giveaways, surprise guests and more.
There is nowhere else to be on Saturday.
St. Vibes then Revision Brewing for
(46:49):
the Baddest Little Bike Show. Come check it out.
You know what I mean? Education lacks that.
Grit doesn't. It for sure it does.
It does. I relate more to it.
I want it's like a you don't go to a gym where everybody's fat.
You know what I mean? I want to tell me how to work
out, right. You sure, right.
I just, I want to know what you went through so I can go.
OK, Well, if I ever experience that, I know you know what I
(47:10):
mean, right. So you do have a lot of profound
wisdom, especially for being young.
Young. You are young.
I am not young. How old are you I'm.
Going to be 43. And you're not 43, dude.
OK, we'll just say 33. We'll just take 10 years off.
Are you doing St. vibrations or what are you going to do?
I don't know. I'm all, I haven't decided
(47:31):
whether I want to do any of thatright now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm all.
I think I'm just kind of doing the mom thing, relaxing, maybe
work on that biography. Yeah, I'm pretty sure that'll
probably kill my chances of everbeing a successful children's
author. Yeah.
No, seriously, my mom's going tobe mad.
Everybody I know, it's going to be like she.
(47:51):
Fucking did what? Yeah, yeah.
I'm going to be like, hey, whatever you heard about me,
believe it, it's true. Go back and read it again.
Wait till this one you get an agent and that one then put that
out. I know I'm going to have to find
separate. No tape backs, you know what I
mean? It is going to be a no tape
backs kind of thing. I'd be like, I'm really sorry.
Yeah, no, that's real. One of the other things I was
going to ask you was books you've read that have impacted
(48:16):
your life. What are some of the books that
you've read that have changed your way of thinking in your
life or had a profound impact onyour on your heart?
I would definitely say like the book that we were talking about
the other day, The Prey Naked. It's just a story of the pastor
for Summit Christian Church and his story with him and his wife
(48:38):
and their journey together and their relationship dynamic.
I believe it taught me forgiveness.
And a lot of things, whether that's with people,
relationships or just that peacebetween relationships and
marriage dynamics and relationships and partners.
So for me, I've always learned to be patient with people.
(49:01):
I'm always one to forgive and itjust kept my heart open to
understanding that everybody comes from all different walks
of life. So for me, I'm very religious as
far as like Christianity, I believe that, you know, that's a
very important piece for myself and for my family in order to be
the best version of myself that I can be for them as a parent.
(49:24):
I believe it's God then the family after.
So I think that what you pour into your cup, you know, with
your religion, then I think thatthat's what feeds and feels the
rest of your family. So reading that book was very
eye opening just to see how people are in other
relationships that you would look on outside and, you know,
(49:47):
you think, oh, this is perfect. This is what marriage looks
like. And we have some big belief that
everybody else's marriage is perfect.
And you know, they've had their downfalls and stuff as well.
So for me, it just kind of gave me an eye opening piece in order
to be able to forgive, especially being divorced, I
(50:08):
know a lot of people would be like, don't give him that grace.
Remember what he did or who he is.
But at the same time, that's still somebody that I loved at
one point, still the father of my children.
And no amount of anything that he's done, I have always given
him a space to be forgiven. And I always give him that
empathy and grace so. There's a lot of forgiveness
(50:28):
there. Yes.
So I think that humbled me as a person, so I'm at least
thankful. For that part of that book.
Yeah, I definitely am of the type of personal accountability
first, you know what I mean? And you know, we in in the
program, we try to live by this principle where it's absolute
(50:54):
and utter acceptance all the time.
You know what I mean? Like we cannot control other
people. And holding resentment is the
most toxic thing that I can do, you know what I mean?
And I do have friends like that.It's like where the world,
they'll hold, hold a grudge forever, man.
And that shit doesn't help, you know what I mean?
I do really thoroughly like the concept that you're talking
(51:15):
about as far as just radical acceptance, you know what I
mean? I think that is an important
thing. It's also fuck, who wants to
just be angry all the fucking time, you know?
What I mean, yeah. And it's so easy to let that
shit go. It's just hard to get there to
where you're willing to let it go.
You know what I mean? I.
Get that? But you got to think back to
(51:36):
we've all made our mistakes. We've all made poor decisions at
one point in our life. But depending on who the people
were that were surrounding us atthe time, somebody forgave us.
You know what I mean? We have been given second
chances, third chances to get everything right or at least try
and be a better version of ourself every day.
So somebody took that chance to give it to you, so why wouldn't
(51:59):
you give it to somebody else? You know what I mean?
And to have a type of hate in your heart for anybody is 1 Not
going to help you grow. You're just going to hold on to
a past, which means that you don't have that space to move
forward. So for me, I don't think that
that's something that I would want for myself or my children
to see is, oh, well, I'm still really mad at this person.
(52:21):
Like I'm not going to forgive them because then I didn't teach
them anything. So I think that you should
always try and move with that thought, that you should give
people that type of forgiveness and empathy that you would want
to swell. I totally agree.
And you touched on social media.That's that's yeah, I definitely
think like that Social media is crazy because you only see the
(52:48):
Johnson, the Joneses and the white fences and the absolute
best of whatever and it's and man, that's definitely something
that I've struggled with even inmy own relationship and just in
my life is to the point where I'm going to where I want other
people to do my social media. You know what I mean?
Because I'll look and like, man,I don't have the motorcycle that
(53:09):
guy has or I don't have the thing that that guy has or I I
definitely feel like that often.It's definitely something I've
I've struggled with and just forthe people listening to social
media isn't fucking real. You know what I mean?
No one's going to no one's goingto post their, you know, their
fight with their significant other and how they resolved it.
They're only going to, you're only going to see the absolute
(53:29):
best of of, of everybody on social media and it's just not
real. The Kardashians, the whatever,
it's the real shit happens behind the scenes.
When the camera's off. Right.
And you look, you, the where yougo look is what we're doing now.
Interviews with people who get to be candid, sitting on a chair
for an hour and a half, you knowwhat I mean?
And and you really see every everything about every.
(53:52):
Single emotion, yeah. You know, yeah, no, it's, it's
no, you're good. It's definitely something.
To me, social media is the same as drugs and alcohol.
It is a form of me needing to beaccepted.
It's a symptom of a larger problem.
(54:13):
Well, the one that we're moving forward and with our children.
And the new? Generations after.
Us Are you letting your kids have social media?
They have Instagram, but they'rejust watching reels.
And I was like, dude, I was like, this is going to dumb you
down. I was like, you can't spend all
day on this. I was all because it's not real.
I'm like, you need to be in the present and the here and the
now. And I was like, and they just
(54:34):
want to dumb you down anyways sowe can form to society and a
government system. Let's be real.
So I think that for me, you know, it's true.
What we see on social media isn't the raw, unfiltered,
unedited versions of people on aday-to-day basis and be like, Oh
my God, I am here and let's takea selfie.
(54:56):
But then 5 seconds later you're swatting your kid and you're
like, why'd you do that? But you were just on social
media being like, jeez. So it's not, it's not reality.
And if you have that much time to sit there and post all these
candid shots all day long, are you really living in reality
'cause you're taking that time away from your family and your
(55:18):
real day-to-day where you're taking that time and you're
sitting there, you're like, please go, go do something.
Mommy has to post. Yeah, that is crazy.
Like you're. Dismissing your child's needs or
potentially. Yeah, yeah, I'm I, and I've
definitely been guilty of that. Or just wanting to be mind
numbed instead of being a parent, you know what I mean?
Yeah, you're like in the five seconds of retardation.
(55:38):
Oh my God. In the rabbit hole, right?
Here and I'll catch myself and just be like damn that made me
feel like a derp. I give myself 5 to 10.
Minutes the. Kids are at school.
Yeah. For sure, I'm all other than
that I try not to 'cause I'm like, I don't have time for this
unless it's something for like book stuff.
But again, when they're in school, that's when I feel it's
(55:59):
acceptable for me because then they're getting the rest of my
time. So I don't really post on social
media unless it's something for book, but other than that,
Alaska does a lot of the postingand stuff like that.
For all of my book stuff. I'm like, bless her soul, she
does it way better than me. Badass.
Yeah. Well, Jackie, thank you so much
(56:19):
for coming on. Jackie's book will be available
on the Spotify links and the YouTube links underneath.
Where can they? Can people find you on social
media? You said your website.
Where else? Oh, like as far as social media,
you got Jacqueline Rhodes rights, and that's on Facebook.
Jacqueline Rhodes words. I believe that's Instagram.
(56:41):
And then you had a YouTube. Channel as well I do Jacqueline
Rhodes on YouTube. That's it.
Yeah. All right.
We'll tag your socials on everything.
We really appreciate you being here.
Thank you for having me.
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