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The Alan Cox Show

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
The Federal Communications Commission has determined the following content to
be emotionally harmful.

Speaker 2 (00:07):
Funny Things that you think is funny aren't funny.

Speaker 1 (00:11):
Jimmy coxall the Time, Allan.

Speaker 3 (00:14):
Cox Show picks ash Man, Welcome, Welcome, show me what
you go? I'm gonna see a lot of cocks on TV.

Speaker 2 (00:21):
Allen Cox from the Allen Coxhow.

Speaker 4 (00:22):
I don't know what it's about you, but I can't
say I think.

Speaker 3 (00:27):
It would be a gray soo.

Speaker 1 (00:28):
Let's coffee.

Speaker 5 (00:30):
You get that.

Speaker 1 (00:30):
You'll just eight with a efty group.

Speaker 3 (00:32):
Okay, what do three?

Speaker 1 (00:36):
Take it?

Speaker 3 (00:37):
Tom Da put you one time?

Speaker 6 (00:39):
Take it?

Speaker 3 (00:42):
Allen Cox. Here we go, he'll add, he'll be fine.

Speaker 7 (00:44):
It's the Allen Cox Show on one hundred point seven
double U m m.

Speaker 8 (00:48):
As Oh, there we go. I don't know why they

(01:11):
didn't hit what good afternoon, greetings, Welcome. My name's Alan Cox.
What's good?

Speaker 3 (01:19):
Thanks for being here? Say how to Rob Anthony? He's
there too. What's up? Man? Jess is back in studio.
G Hey law Powela. Jess comes in before the show
and hands me an open bag of gummy worms and
she goes, hey, these are terrible.

Speaker 8 (01:35):
I'd like you to have them, and did you like them?

Speaker 3 (01:40):
I would say that they weren't as bad as you
thought they were, but they're not as good as I
would like. Nevertheless, I accept them in the spirit in
which they are given, and I will eat them so
they will not go to waste.

Speaker 8 (01:54):
I like gummy worms. I like gummy bears, anything in
gummy forms. I know that I'm opening myself up a
whole can of gummy worms there, But for the most part,
at any given time, I will have a half eaten
bag of gummy bears somewhere in my backpack. Now, I

(02:16):
don't munch on them constantly, so by the time I
remember I have that bag in there.

Speaker 3 (02:22):
They're stale, they're hard, whatever.

Speaker 8 (02:24):
But all you got to do, Rob, if you've got
a bag of stale gummy bears, is just put one
in your mouth, Rob and suck it.

Speaker 3 (02:31):
Pardon me, it's cussing me.

Speaker 8 (02:38):
And of course they'll get The more you suck it, Rob,
the softer it gets.

Speaker 3 (02:42):
Okay, get all the flavors, get all of the fla
and Sloppy, right, thank you, Jackie's snowing again. I sit
here in my uh and Sloppy, I sit here in
my coffin for the most part all morning long, and
so on the rare occasion I go out there to
get water, grabbed my unstolen celsius out of the communal fridge.

(03:06):
It was snowing again and it was listen, my daughter
had a snow day. You know, a lot of school
districts I think were closed, and they couldn't have made
my daughter happier. She was a praying last night. And again,
we are secular people. We're not prone to praying to
any imaginary men in the sky. But my daughter was

(03:26):
praying that she would have a snow day today, and
of course that's exactly what happened. So when I woke
her up this morning and said, hey, you don't have school,
and she's like, oh, I mean, even though my daughter's
nine and she's sharp as attack, it is still kind
of beyond her sometimes that no school doesn't mean no
work for dad. So I'm like, yeah, I still have

(03:47):
to go to work. I I don't get a work
day when it snows. But it did take me an
hour to get into work this morning from Bay Village.
But it's fine, Rob because up drive of that dadge
Durango peel through the snow. I am boy that rental.
I was not worried that at all, but I was
surprised to see, you know, because a lot of times

(04:08):
those of us who live on the west Side, jess,
are you in Lakewood? Not right now? No, but okay,
I did live in you live in like Wood? Anyway.
I mentioned that because I saw that Lakewood got the
most snow, and I was kind of surprised because I
always think, you know, if you live on the west Side,
you kind of have this false sense of security when
it comes to the Lake Effect snow. You know, people

(04:29):
who live out like Chardon Way way East, they just
get hammered. And that was still true this time. But
like when we were gone this past weekend, when I
was home with my family, I was hearing from everybody
back here that basically, you know, we were just getting
hammered with snow. And normally it's way farther east of us.
But Lakewood got the most snow. I guess overnight they

(04:50):
got like seven inches of snow, oh well, six or
seven in seven six seven six or seven inches of
snow as of nine o'clock this morning. But you know,
I've been listening to the weather reports here and they're like.

Speaker 8 (05:04):
Hey, it's gonna be sunny, Tomiro, it's gonna be just five.

Speaker 3 (05:07):
So what wraps today as today? I am leaving work
last night, a few minutes after seven pm, and the
lovely cleaning lady who's here on the PM shift. I
wish I knew her name so I could address her properly,
but I don't know her name. But we've referred to
her before as arguably one of the nicest, seemingly happiest

(05:31):
people we've ever met. She's always like laughing, either to
herself or something else. And we were both leaving at
the same time. She was done, when she was cleaning
up here in the suite, and I was leaving, going
walking to the garage, and she's holding the door for me,
and as I'm walking down the hall, she goes, does
anybody ever tell you that you look like? And she
can't conjure it. She goes, oh, not the not the

(05:54):
King of Rock. And I'm like, and I don't say anything.
I'm not gonna try to fill in the gaps for her,
because I know whatever she says it's gonna be awful.
It's going to be well intentioned, but it's gonna have
nothing and she can't come you. Oh God, you look
like because I know it's just has to do with
the hair. Whatever they say, I look like. It's always
wherever my hair is at that point. Not the Godfather

(06:15):
of soul. Ozzie, Ozzie, she said, Ozzie. Now again, it's
just because I have long hair. She goes, has anyone
ever told you you look like Ozzy? And I go Nope,
that would be a first for me. I said, I
hope you don't mean Ozzy.

Speaker 9 (06:30):
Now?

Speaker 3 (06:31):
Did you know he was dead?

Speaker 8 (06:32):
She did not, Okay, and so well, if she did,
she didn't, she didn't let on.

Speaker 3 (06:37):
She seemed confused by that comment. I said, I hope
you mean don't mean now as opposed to before. I mean,
you did have on like Ozzy.

Speaker 8 (06:45):
You did have on those circle glasses yesterday with the
purple lenses.

Speaker 3 (06:50):
John Lennon glasses that could have done it. How do
you land on that style, because that is a very
specific style that, depending on your generation, you only do
associate with either John Lennon or Ozzy. Oy Ozzy's been
rocking those what like the nineties a long time. Yeah,
but the circle glasses, you know, and that's a very
specific look. Uh, it's not that flattering really on anybody.

(07:13):
But that's what they went with, he and John Lennon.
I don't see Ozzie at all with you, No, of
course not. No one has ever in No, Ozzie didn't
let his hair go in good dark brown. Good for him.
I should be doing that, but I have who cares. Ah,

(07:35):
But no, I've never gotten met before in my life,
and i'd venture to guess I'll never get it again. Rob.
Next time somebody tries to pull that on me, they go,
does anybody ever tell you that you look like I'm
gonna go Ozzie? And they're gonna go Ozzie. No, imagine,
that's exactly what I was thinking. No, I was thinking
Clint Howard. I was thinking Rob Howard's older, uglier brother,

(08:00):
star of the Ice Cream Man. That's who I was thinking, Ozzie.
And then they go laughing down the hall. I'm like, oh,
somebody one time told me that they look like Ozzy.
You do not look like Ozzy. Don't ever listen to
that person again.

Speaker 8 (08:13):
Whenever they tell you do all right, you do not
look like Ozzy Osbourne.

Speaker 3 (08:18):
You do not know my hair was shorter and blonder
years ago. People would say Keith Urban, but again I
would go, it's just the hair. It's the hair, and
I have to assume it's because when they look at
my face, uh, they either have some kind of face
blindness or they're pretending that they have face blindness so
that they don't have to contend with this collection of

(08:39):
features that I have in the middle of my head.
And if you've gone to a Monsters game or a
Calves game and you've seen my giant fat nogging up
there on the jumbo tron, you know what I'm talking about.
Now my face is a lot less fat than it
used to be. You know, I all get those We
all get to relive our memories through social media when

(09:00):
it tries to remind you of things that already happened. Right, Hey,
remember this five years ago, I got Jesus Christ thirty
pounds heavier, no thank you. And when I see that
stuff now, I'm like wolf, like even six months ago. Well,
because you've lost a lot of weight. Yeah, how'd you
do that? Oh? With mentality mentality Health you can check
them out for yourself at mentalityhealth dot com. Slash Radio, what.

Speaker 8 (09:23):
Slash radio slash radio Wow, and tell them Rob.

Speaker 3 (09:27):
Sidley every butt it? Hey, Rob, sadly I'm looking at it.
That be fatly more you get some I don't know,
they do something with I think the testing or something
like that, Like they knock a whole bunch of money
off if you mentioned it. So now do you have
to go on fart walks? You know we mentioned this
months ago fart walks, but now it's really taking hold again.
They say, oh, it's a great thing after dinner to

(09:48):
go on a fart walk so that you can.

Speaker 8 (09:50):
I read the article again because it always gets me
as clickbait. It's like Thanksgiving fart walks, Save Live and
I'm like, thanks Live, I didn't see saved. What is
a Thanksgiving fart walk? And I'm like, oh, it's just
walking after you eat, like you should do. Anyway, I'm like, okay,
I get it. Well, but I think it's funny that

(10:11):
a lot of people are like, I don't want to walk,
and they think, here's how we incentivize people.

Speaker 3 (10:17):
Oh, you walk, but then you fart.

Speaker 8 (10:19):
Yeah, most people are walking around farting all the time.

Speaker 3 (10:22):
Anyway, all right, this is not how is this a
new thing? You're gonna be fine hugging it along behind you. Yeah,
John from Parma, my condolence is on the loss of
your dog. Thank you John. My wife posted that. I
saw that a very very nice tribute to our late
great to Australian shepherd June Carter Cox, and she'd been

(10:43):
sitting on that for a while. I was talking to
her last night. She's like, I just feel like if
I post something that's like a that's like a period
on the whole thing. I go, you don't have to
post anything, you know what I mean, Like you're not
everybody thinks they're required to post. And I know where
she's coming from, and I was just kind of trying
to make her feel better about it, but I was like,
you don't have to post anything, And then Today's she did.
But yeah, it's always so sad to look at that stuff. Man.

Speaker 8 (11:07):
At any time you lose someone or something, it's sad anyway,
But man alive the pictures of that dog. Dog's just
so innocent, just loves you, you know what I mean,
Like there's nothing better than a dog.

Speaker 3 (11:18):
There was a thing that somebody sent to me because
I did get In the immediate aftermath, we put her
to sleep last Friday Friday before and I got a
lot of nice messages from people, and somebody sent me
like a clip of TikTok or something where these two
people were talking about it's not that dogs live short lives.
Is that dogs lives. They're like humans take a long

(11:39):
time to like because obviously we have much more complex
brains and things like that, where like humans take a
long time to figure out things like empathy and how
to interact to other people. They're like, dogs love you
immediately and their whole lives and so it's not that
they have short lives. They have short lives compared to
ours obviously, but they're like, but their entire lives are,

(12:00):
you know, in in utter devotion to whoever their people
are and blah blah blah, and so whether or not
that has any basis and science, it was a sweet sentiment.

Speaker 8 (12:07):
What everything revolves around you, right Like they eat and
drink because of you, they go outside because of you.
Everything is so they in turn just love you. Yeah,
they should the greatest thing in the world.

Speaker 3 (12:18):
They should.

Speaker 8 (12:18):
When I was letting my dog in a three in
the morning in the winter, I'm like, which one of
us is I'm picking up your crap. I'm giving you food.
Oh yeah, No one of us is the pet bro
well you yeah yeah, it owns you, but it loves
you unconditionally.

Speaker 3 (12:32):
Yeah. Some years ago my wife got macause. I tried
to strap a yoke tour and have her plow the
back forty and then it works so well, she's like
a foot and a half off the ground. I'm like, well, listen,
she's a hurting dog. She would have done good in
this snow storm. Oh yes, with that type of thing.
Oh yeah, well now she's three feet under in the storm.
Man in our gardens, I put it. That's where she is.

(12:52):
She's in our garden.

Speaker 7 (12:54):
The car show on one all our men and women
in uniform.

Speaker 5 (13:02):
I've been a life long twenty years of military.

Speaker 3 (13:05):
Come back from a sign.

Speaker 10 (13:06):
Your afternoons show is horrible.

Speaker 7 (13:10):
Thanks from the Alan Cox Show horrible on one hundred
point seven WMMS.

Speaker 3 (13:29):
Three. I want us to be a text Alancoxshow dot
com best place to email me Vidia Alan coxhow sticker
scut them out there for you. I'm happy to send
those out if you listen to us on the iHeartRadio
app from out of state. Tell me where you do that,
Oh God, over the course, I forget where I was

(13:50):
when we were gone for Thanksgiving. I was somewhere a
retail establishment, was buying something and I heard somebody else,
this woman was asking another woman where she got it,
and she was saying it on temu and it was
driving you know, timu. Okay, I've never gotten anything from
it because it's but some people swear by it, right,
I mean, to me, it's probably represents, uh, you know,

(14:12):
obviously a convenience, but uh, you know, it's just cheap
crapt from China that you know, you get addressed for
two dollars or whatever. And she kept I got it
on Temu. I'm like, isn't it timu? I think I've
only ever heard it referred to as team really have?

Speaker 8 (14:28):
Yeah, but which one's right? One of those is wrong.
There was a commercial playing for it, and I don't
remember what the right answer to that.

Speaker 3 (14:34):
It might be God unless temu is the native Chinese
way to say it pronunciation, and we're all stupid. And
I've never used it, but people who have used it,
I've only ever heard it referred to as tmu, and
so it just really caught my ear. I was like,

(14:55):
what are you talking about? But maybe she was right, Yeah,
I don't. I've never used it. I have it. I've
looked at it like I can see the deals and stuff,
but I don't need any of those things. Alan, you're
driving that rental Durango. Have you checked the center console?
The should be a complimentary bottle of Aquaedisho. Hey listen,
Aquadijo is its own compliment, sir or madam? All right,

(15:20):
I get Rock Car Noir or Yop? Remember Yop?

Speaker 5 (15:25):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (15:25):
Oh god, yeah, Drock Car Noir. I wore that in
high not high school. I don't think it really wore
Colntal College, but obviously my freshman year was nineteen eighty
nine and I wore Drock Car Noir. They still wore
I know they did. I stopped wearing it a number
of years later when I was dating this girl and

(15:47):
she said something like, oh, I really like that cologne.
It reminds me of my dad. I was like, nope,
must you Benetton colors? Back in the day, I remember
a girlfriend gave me that for Christmas one year. Curve
guy for a long Yeah, Curve's good cool water. Yeah,
David Off, I have two little things of cologne on

(16:12):
my vanity, and I love both of them. One is
like a sage and grapefruit or something from Joe Malone
and the other one is Armani Code, and they both
smell great. But every time I go to grab one,
I go because you kind of gotta be a cologne
guy or not be a cologne guy. That's how I

(16:32):
feel about it, Like you either have to dive in
and your cologne guy, and back in the day I
kind of was. But then you're surrounded by so many
dudes who don't know how to wear cologne, and it
just burns your face off and it ruins it for you.
Even something the smells good, I'm like, bro, you don't
have to dive into a kiddie pool full of it. Well,

(16:53):
pinch between your chicken gums and you're fine. So those
two little tiny bottles, little like sample tester bottles, they
go largely unused. Once in a while, dabble little Harmani
code on, But even that, I'm like, it's fine. Like
I don't you know. The way I see it, Robb,
is my natural pheromones are already working over time, so

(17:18):
enticing yes and the immortal words of Andy Partridge.

Speaker 8 (17:22):
Yeah, listen, I had a girlfriend that worked for Esday
Lauder and she would she would always get me a
bottle of Pleasures for Men.

Speaker 3 (17:31):
Yes, I love the way this smells on you. Pleasures
all the same on everybody. Pleasures for Men. It's from
Stay Lauder. No, it smells different on you. I'm like,
is that a good thing or a bad thing? Everybody?
Everybody manifests their own scent because they put it on
their body and it mixes with your body's natural kind
of oils and odors, and so everybody gives off. You

(17:51):
can still get Pleasures for men. Yeah. I saw an
advertisement the other night. They were like, because it's Christmas,
and it was for Pleasures for Men now available at Macy's.
She was a big fan of that scent boy. So,
first of all, my amazement was twofold because a I
go ooh, pleasures for Men is around still, And then
I went ooh, Macy's is still a thing. Who knew

(18:15):
I do? Because I go to the malls. Well, they
actually put and I didn't even realize this. It's probably
been there for months and I've driven past it not
even noticed. I'll buy me near Crocker Park. They put
a Macy's where the bed bath and beyond used to be.
Remember when they all went teet's up, and so they
have these empty stories. They put a Macy's in there,
so it's clearly a scaled down Macy's. But those bed

(18:37):
bath and beyond were not exactly small retail footprints. But
I've never gone in there, so I'm being a little
cheeky about Macy's. But fishures, so I'm not kidding them.
You go home, You're always like, what is that smell? Honey?
It's pleasures for men? Oh that's right. It wasn't you

(18:57):
that liked it. It was that other chick, right, all the
lady was right. There was a Super Bowl commercial for
Tamou and it was pronounced how they did really tamo?
I think, right, Okay, I've always heard here same. I've
only ever heard timu. All right, but I think that
that was in the commercial. They were like and they

(19:17):
just kept saying it weird, and I'm like, wy they
be well, And it also wasn't like I wasn't looking
at this woman like were you talking about dummy? I
was just like, boy, I've never heard that, and I'm
it's idiot. No, actually it's t's jes. Do you wear perfume?

Speaker 5 (19:33):
I wear a nice deyodorant?

Speaker 3 (19:36):
So do you wear deodorant?

Speaker 5 (19:37):
That hand sanmitizer has a good smell sometimes nice?

Speaker 8 (19:40):
Yeah, I wear a nice deodorant.

Speaker 3 (19:43):
Aa is it? Is it strong enough for a man
but made for a woman? I don't know. It's like
dove or is it all? The whole thing now is
all body deodorant and it's a nice way. You might
have seen this woman who invented it. It's called loomy.
I think, oh I hate that. Okay, well I've never
used it, but it's it's i think, marketed towards women.

(20:04):
And they call it an all body deodoran, which is
a nice way of saying, hey, spray your cooch before
you leave the house and you won't have to worry.
I'm like, well, if you need that, yes, you might
want to consult your physician in the first place.

Speaker 8 (20:17):
But that's how they're marketing it. They're like, oh, under
your pits and your bits and your thing.

Speaker 3 (20:21):
And I'm like, listen, the better smelling the general public
can be, the better off. Will all be elan? What
about high karate? Well that's going way back I only
know high karate because my dad had a bottle of
it under the sink, and I never won saw him
take it out. I never heard of it, so that
must have moved with him from the base to whatever

(20:43):
houses he and my mom lived in before I came along.
Sex Panther. I have sex panther. It was given me
years ago, as I've never used it, but I have
a bottle of sex panther by Odeon little bits of
real panther. Yes, so you know it's good sixty percent
of the time. It works every time. Yeah, that makes
no sense. I should find that. I should dig it up.

(21:06):
And the things that they say it smells like. Once
he sprays it is the greatest. He opens up the
bottle and everybody, what's that smell? And they start yelling
out all the different things. It smells like a like
a bag of bigfoots. D Well, that was that one. Yeah,
it smells like a diaper full of Indians. That was
the one I was thinking of. Yeah, what cologne you're
gonna go with London gentlemen? Or wait, no, no, no,

(21:31):
hold on blackbeard'st light. No, she gets a special colonne.

Speaker 1 (21:38):
It's called sex Panther.

Speaker 3 (21:39):
By Odeon.

Speaker 1 (21:41):
It's a legal in nine countries.

Speaker 3 (21:44):
Yep.

Speaker 11 (21:45):
It's made with bits of real panther, so you know
it's good. It's quite pungent. Oh yeah, it stings. It's
a formida little scent stings the nostrils in a good way. Yeah, Brian,
I having to be honest with you. That smells like
pure gasoline. They've done studies. You know, sixty percent of
the time it works every time.

Speaker 3 (22:08):
That doesn't make sense. Hmmm. I mean I don't know math,
but it doesn't sound like it makes sense.

Speaker 12 (22:12):
I know what you're asking yourself. The answer is yes,
I have a nickname from my penis. It's called me Offtagon.
But I also nicknamed my testes. My left one is
James westfall Am, I right one is doctor Kenneth Noisewater.

Speaker 5 (22:25):
Mm hmmm.

Speaker 3 (22:26):
At first it was so good, doctor Kenneth Noisewater, speaking
of your testicles. Part of the night before Thanksgiving at
my brother's house was because we're all sitting around eating
and drinking hol of peno margaritis. Well the kids are
running run. Upstairs is my brother in law, who married
my sister a couple of summers ago, who was a cop.
My brother in law telling us about how I don't

(22:48):
know how we got on vasectomy stories. My brother in
law telling us how the doctors told him he had
one of the thickest scrotums they'd ever seen. That's something
that's the running joke.

Speaker 13 (22:58):
Now.

Speaker 3 (22:59):
I was like, wow, that is like literally like I
barely know this dude, but now I know this about him.
He's got a fixed sack, like is that a flax
stor he goes. I don't know, he goes. I just
they that's what they told me. He goes. I hadn't
given it a second thought, like, wow, did they have
to go in with like special grade scalpels or anything
like that, or you know, bring the big guns. Yeah,

(23:22):
he's like yeah, it took him a while. And then
they told me later on they were like, you you
just got a very thick strow them. So that sounds
like something that you whip out at a bar trying
to a very thick sproking you don't have much game. Yeah,
let me go to uh Corey formerly of Tarpin Springs, Florida. Man,

(23:47):
what's up?

Speaker 14 (23:49):
Not much? I hopped in the car. I got a
day off. You guys were talking Colonnes for a hot second.
So I was like, oh, there's a good for you,
there's an excuse.

Speaker 3 (23:58):
To call in. Yeah, bother you yeah, uh you.

Speaker 14 (24:04):
I didn't hear the first part. You started talking about
your brother scrot him.

Speaker 8 (24:07):
Uh did you probably brother in law?

Speaker 15 (24:10):
No?

Speaker 3 (24:10):
No, uh, no blood relation. The Coxes aren't known for
their scrubs. Well, we're known something. We're known for normal
thickness of scrot him. I believe Rob. I don't know
the eyes kind of a sectomy, and I don't know
that there was any comment made on behalf of my
scrot Hum. Huh, go ahead, Corey, I.

Speaker 14 (24:29):
See your how your guys' relationship is going. Not to
give away how I smell, but I don't. We're in
the same sentence high school. And uh, it's a delicious scent.

Speaker 15 (24:39):
Man.

Speaker 14 (24:39):
If you know it's a nautica but specifically voyage, you
give give that a sniff and see.

Speaker 3 (24:46):
If that works for you.

Speaker 14 (24:48):
Nautica voyage the voyage man.

Speaker 3 (24:50):
And it's not voyage. It's not nautica voyage. It's voyage.
I mean it could be.

Speaker 14 (24:56):
It depends on how you're feeling that day.

Speaker 3 (24:58):
All right, how about because somebody, somebody said, why by coloonbie,
you just rub the magazine samples on your neck. Oh,
I've done that back when there were magazines. Yeah, when
I was getting Esquire and GQ back in the n
I'm absolutely doing that. I go ooh gray flannel, Oh, Claiborne,
sport Ooh obsession. C K one that was unisex. I

(25:21):
sure am c K one was more Citrusy. I still
have that.

Speaker 8 (25:25):
I will if I'm going to wear it, I will
occasionally put that on.

Speaker 3 (25:29):
That's one of the only colonnes I still have. Yeah,
and I will put c K one on. Oh boy,
all right, well very lightly. It's a nice, little pleasant
it's it's it's another kind of pleasure men.

Speaker 8 (25:42):
Yes, all right, good Mozeltop, Thank you Corey.

Speaker 1 (25:46):
Wait wait hold on, no, l.

Speaker 14 (25:49):
What uh very very briefly, because you know I us
p ones get saddened even though you have family time. Yeah,
last week you guys were going through and kind of
ripping apart varieties hilarious comedy movies and how they made
no sense.

Speaker 3 (26:06):
Yeah.

Speaker 14 (26:07):
For me, there's three movies that I watch once a
year routinely. That is Clue, Bird Cage and one that
a lot of people don't like, but I love. I
don't know if you guys, you know Undercover Blues with
Dennis Quaid Kathleen Turner.

Speaker 3 (26:27):
I don't know. I remember it, but I don't think
I've ever seen that. And Clue is a movie that
I'm constantly trying to remember to watch and I always
forget you. I have seen it, but I mean like
again because it's so underrated. Colleen camp is still juggy
and hot in that, and Michael McKean, and is Susan
Sarandon in there? Or am I? Okay?

Speaker 16 (26:50):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (26:51):
Leslie and Warren is who I'm thinking of in Clue?
And Christopher Lloyd. Yeah, no, I always when I'm clicking around,
I'm always hurting. Yeah, excellent movie. Yeah.

Speaker 8 (26:59):
I was just on one of those like subcarrier channels
like Samsung TV has, you know, and it was it
was on and I stopped and watched it.

Speaker 3 (27:07):
It's great.

Speaker 8 (27:07):
All right, are we done now, Corey? Yes, here's the
middle movie, the middle movie, guy. The middle movie was.

Speaker 3 (27:16):
It was Undercover Blues, it was Clue, and it was
The Bird The Bird Cage is one of my favorites.
I love that movie.

Speaker 8 (27:23):
I used to make my mother and my grandmother laugh,
because I would talk like Agador Spartacus for days on end,
and I would not We would go to restaurants, we
would go play.

Speaker 3 (27:31):
I would only talk in that voice. I think the
silent killer in that movie is the late great Gene Hackman.

Speaker 8 (27:36):
Oh, without playing the straight man, and he comes out
and drag at the end, I'm sorry to ruin it
spoiler alert, Oh Rob, sorry, thank.

Speaker 3 (27:43):
You, Corey.

Speaker 8 (27:43):
Rob just gave away the the big twist there in
the bird cage, or as I call it, the robot cage.

Speaker 3 (27:51):
We would go to stores, dinners.

Speaker 8 (27:54):
I would take my grandmother to a doctor's appointment, and
I would only talk to the doctors in that voice.
Was that the Hank Azaria Cara was Okay, there's nothing
wrong with my grandmother, she's just born.

Speaker 3 (28:06):
Yeah. Well, and he would use that same accent on
The Simpsons, Yes too, Yeah, Allen, I would have guessed
Rob as a brute guy.

Speaker 8 (28:16):
No, my grandfather was a brute guy. It was actually
probably the first, like after shave I put on. He
wasn't an aqua velva guy, he was. He was a
brute guy.

Speaker 13 (28:24):
Right.

Speaker 8 (28:24):
The old green bottle English leather, English leather. Another one Yeah, yummy.
They still make Brute I think by Faberge. Yeah, Brute
old spice. Those were all like the og Grandpa since.

Speaker 3 (28:39):
Allan, the only cologne I've ever used is Adidas Moves
because women like it, even though I've heard several dudes
say that I should use a grown up cologne. Good thing.
I used Colonne to please the ladies and not those schlubs. Yeah,
I never ever. I just don't wear cologne. Yeah, all right. Well,
a lot of people asking if I'm going to play

(29:01):
normal scrotum thickness on two hours to midnight this Saturday night.
I am not. That's our Saturday night metal show. Or
is to measure your scrotum thickness or is that something
has to be done by a medical professional? Rob I
have to imagine that there is a way to measure
any kind.

Speaker 8 (29:15):
Of thickness, but you would have to measure it inside
out to get the actual things.

Speaker 3 (29:20):
So you have to have it open.

Speaker 8 (29:22):
You mean you'd have to spatch cock your scrotum.

Speaker 3 (29:28):
Start with a good slice right down the set. We're
in the middle of the brain between the breasts.

Speaker 11 (29:33):
Oh, we are experiencing technical difficulty.

Speaker 8 (29:39):
Reset night, all right, mister Cox, now we're going to
give you a.

Speaker 3 (29:50):
Local anesthetic here.

Speaker 1 (29:54):
Momentarily please.

Speaker 8 (29:55):
Eric says, you fold it over, measure it, and then
divide by two.

Speaker 3 (29:59):
Then I'll give you your okay, thanks, and then divide
by two. Yeah, thank you.

Speaker 5 (30:05):
All right.

Speaker 8 (30:05):
Well to get a digital caliber and figure out what's doing.

Speaker 3 (30:09):
Yes, I wonder if there's a female analog for this.
You know, I know that they are all different, but
they all start the same. Okay. People are rattling off
their colowns to me now Lacoste White, Well, that feels redundant. Okay,
I gotta take a break here. Hey, I wanna go

(30:31):
see Go see the Allen.

Speaker 1 (30:38):
Carr Show on one hund.

Speaker 17 (30:45):
WMMS Cleveland's call the Alan Cox Show.

Speaker 8 (30:49):
He'll tell you all the best knock knock jokes, plus
is surprising opinions about Hawaiians two one.

Speaker 17 (30:54):
Six seven eight one double oh seven or eight one
double oh seven.

Speaker 18 (30:59):
In Cleveland Station November's Chill, a panel appeared on the
window sill with a circle cut out.

Speaker 3 (31:08):
Oh what a side.

Speaker 18 (31:10):
The mystery grew in the fading line, snowflakes, fallen, whispers grow.
What's behind that panel's glow? That's the glory? What could
it be a portal to joy mystery jingle bells ring

(31:33):
as the stories roll of Cleveland's own festa gloryush.

Speaker 3 (31:42):
I was looking for Cleveland on this list of the
top cities the most festive pet cities. I had a
dog up until a couple of weeks ago. Rod has dogs.
Uh just has moss balls. Sorry, she had moss balls.

(32:03):
You don't currently have a pet. No, that's no topic.
The kid. You get a five month old and that's
the same as having a pet, except you can set
a five month old down and they'll stay there, you know.
But no, nowhere to be se I don't know what
you do in Cleveland. You know, it's such a rarity.
And I'm a booster man.

Speaker 8 (32:23):
You know, a couple of weeks from now, I will
have been here sixteen years and I'm a booster.

Speaker 3 (32:27):
It took me a while to get there, but happily
neck deep now. And you know, invariably you will find
Cleveland show up on these worst lists. Just give me
them on like the festive pet list. Why not? Nope,
nowhere to be seen. Ohio not repped at all, by
the way. Midland, Texas is the most festive city for pets.

(32:54):
A lot of cities in.

Speaker 8 (32:55):
Texas, Dixon City, d C K s O N.

Speaker 1 (32:59):
Rob.

Speaker 3 (33:00):
You ever heard of Dixon City, Pennsylvania. No, I lived
in Pennsylvania for almost a decade. I don't heard of
Dixon City. Probably the middle of the state, Roseville, Michigan,
Cape Coral, Florida nowhere to be seen. How where they
sell the cider Dixon Cider. Yeah, wmms Rob on social
media and so yeah.

Speaker 8 (33:24):
All kinds of places, just not Cleveland. I mean, don't
they do this Saturday They're doing light Up Lakewood. That's
like a thing that they do every year.

Speaker 3 (33:31):
And I go, you go, Alan. Everybody does holidays stuff,
I know, and I don't know that there's a pet component.
I know Lakewood does that Spooky Pooch parade they used to.
I don't know if they still do it where you know,
people dress their animals up for Halloween. But this weekend
they're doing light Up Lakewood. So it's all festive. That
can't get you on this list at all. I'm just

(33:55):
looking for good news, you know. I try to be
a glass half full kind of guy. Keep your Contrary
to popular belief, they somebody did a list of the
most fun cities in the United States and Cincinnati at
number ten. Cincinnati just squeaks in now full disclosure, I've

(34:16):
driven through Cincinnati. I've never spent any time there. People
talk about people who are well versed in architecture will
tell you these amazing I don't know if it's our
deco or if it's postmodern. I don't know what it is.
But people who know way more about that stuff than
I do, we'll talk about the amazing architecture in Cincinnati.

(34:36):
And the only time I'll ever hear anybody talk in
glowing terms about Cincinnati is when they're from there, which
you know stands to reason, but I know nothing about it.
But they're the only place in Ohio that broke through
the top ten the most fun cities. Obviously, you know
what the big ones are going to be. It's going
to be Vegas, it's going to be Orlando, it's gonna

(34:58):
be Miami. Hoppy, and uh Cincinnati squeaking in at number ten,
LA probably, Yeah, the most fun cities in the United
States Vegas, Orlando, Miami, in Atlanta, New Orleans. You can
have a great time in Atlanta. Boy New York. That's

(35:19):
further down than you would think Cincinnati comes squeaks in
at number ten, Chicago eleven, when New York is number fourteen. Wow, Cleveland,
Ohio comes in at number forty six. That's not great.
The most fun cities in the United States now they
ranked one hundred and eighty two cities. It's not terrible.
Forty six ain't bat no, uh but yeah whatever, we're

(35:44):
comfortably wedged in between Raleigh. That's fun city if you've
ever been there, and uh battou in Louisiana. Who's number one?
Was it? Vegas? Las Vegas rob that is Spanish for
or the Vegas, Orlando, Miami, Atlanta, New Orleans, Houston, San Francisco, Austin, Texas.

(36:09):
It was just there this summer Portland, Oregon, and Cincinnati, Ohio. Chicago,
Illinois coming in at number eleven, just outside the top ten.
I take personal umberge to that. But listen, chips fall
where they may. But I mean, listen, Honolulu is you're
trying to tell me according to and again, this is

(36:29):
just crunching data. It's you know, they have a set
of data points and they crunch the numbers and that's
how it lays out. One of these websites that does
travel and things like that. So that's what they you know,
entertainment of nightlife and how much things cost, and it's
all data, so you can, you know, take with a
grain of salt and have a little bit of fun
with it. But the fact that Cincinnati's on there at
all surprises me.

Speaker 8 (36:49):
Now you would think that would leave me to go, oh,
maybe they got something going on.

Speaker 3 (36:54):
No guarantee you they don't. Now does Cleveland Again, I'm
a booster, so I would say that, yeah, Cleveland's probably
got something going on. Uh, Columbus comes in at number
fifty eight. Take that Columbus. Yeah, everybody in Columbus walking around.
It's a bunch of suburbs pretending to be a city

(37:17):
and looking down their nose at everybody else. Akron number
one oh three, Toledo number one seventeen. Now I would
say congratulations to the city of Akron, Ohio, to show
up at all on a list of the most fun

(37:38):
cities in the United States. The top one hundred and
eighty two cities that means it's a mathemis one hundred
and seventy nine. No, that's not right, seventy nine cities
rob uh are less fun than Akron, Ohio. And if
you're an Akronite, it's got to make you feel good.

(38:00):
Now you go, Alan, I'm doing some traveling later next year.
What city came in dead last? So I can go
there and then just work my way up. Pearl City, Hawaii.
Second to last year, Penultimate fun City, Lewiston, Maine. Been there. Yes,
we had those phlebottomists call us from Lewiston a couple

(38:22):
of years ago.

Speaker 16 (38:22):
I'm right here by coworker at Saint Married Lewiston Medical
Center whereas wehlebotomists.

Speaker 8 (38:28):
I think that's where Bob Marley lives. I think he's
from Lewiston. You're probably right the comic. Yeah, yeah, not
the dead reggae guy. Not the dead reggae guy.

Speaker 3 (38:37):
Would be great if the reggae artist Bob Marley had
been discovered to have been from Lewiston, Maine.

Speaker 8 (38:42):
And went to Jamaica when he was Yeah child, Yeah,
I'm on originally from Lewiston, Maine.

Speaker 3 (38:48):
Yeah. Henry Lewis Gates Junior or whatever does one of
those finding your Roots on one of Bob Marley the
reggae stars offspring and they go, You're never gonna believe this.
Your father was from Lewiston, Maine. Father was a lobsterman.
A lobster man, A lobsterman. Yeah, there's a girl on
I got sucked into watching Squid Game, the game show

(39:11):
on Netflix, because my wife and kid are watching it.
I never cared about the show Squid Game. I think
I bailed after two episodes. But this game where they
take it's the second or third season of this, I think,
where they take all these people and they winnow them
down pretty quickly. But you're in the last episode now
and it's down to five people and one of the
girls is from One of the remaining people is like

(39:32):
from she's a lobster fisherman. Really, so, I don't know
she's where she's from New Hampshire, rings a bell maybe,
I don't know, maybe Main. But she's like a lobster fisherman.
She doesn't have an accent or anything. But she tells
this story, you know when they do like the little
confessional videos. Yeah, just down at the table. She's telling
the story about how all she ever wanted to do

(39:54):
was be a lot, be a fisherman with her father,
who was a professional fisherman, and he laughed at her.
She got to a certain age. She said, I want
to do what you do, and he laughed at her
and said, you're a female, you can't do this. And
my daughter took that at face value. She took a
great deal of umbrage with that. I said, well, maybe
he was trying to get her to strike out on

(40:15):
her own and come full circle. And that's exactly what happened,
she said. And finally I got my dad's approval, and
my daughter's like, why did she need his approval? Why
couldn't you just go out and do it. I'm like, well,
you got a point, but maybe he wanted her to
make her mark. Oh no, and then come back. No, no, no, no.

(40:36):
I was soft pedaling it for her. I felt like
she was probably one hundred percent correct.

Speaker 8 (40:40):
Any one of your brothers could take over the business tomorrow.

Speaker 3 (40:43):
You got the wrong pats. But yeah, but why is that?
I would think you'd be looking at this point in
the fisher fisherman game or whatever professional fishing game. I
think it'd be just looking for warm bodies. Dude, do
you know how hot it is to pull.

Speaker 8 (40:57):
A lobster pot out of the water when it's full
of lot Any idea I got these little you got
these little things in the side.

Speaker 3 (41:04):
It's like a little mota. Yeah, and it pulls the
plot to the surface. But you still got to get
it on. Bood Well, he told her, except she went
off and did her thing, or did what she had
to do, and she came back and he finally, I guess,
with some experience, which is understandable, brought her into the fold. Well,
I gotta be honest. If your brother can be a hairdresser,

(41:26):
you can be a lobsterman. So it's fine with me.

Speaker 8 (41:28):
He dresses up a Santa every year, right, old Tony
Tony Yeah, Eric and Penhills did that song for us.

Speaker 3 (41:38):
Yep. Tony the amazingly Gay Santa was what it was called.
Rob's friend who used to go to people's houses in
Santa my mother's friend.

Speaker 19 (41:50):
In the heart of old Massachusets, where berms world rage live.

Speaker 3 (41:57):
Tony the Santa, the tong Oh, the s.

Speaker 19 (42:04):
He's walked a sleeve for a cattle, red Rudolph's noose
with glittery suits and some fabulous cloth. He's Jimmy Jimmy,
but never get suped.

Speaker 3 (42:22):
Tony boy.

Speaker 13 (42:23):
He's six and.

Speaker 3 (42:27):
So gets sent up spread.

Speaker 19 (42:35):
And cheer with a boo dry.

Speaker 3 (42:41):
And banter is he says, I'm a dryer and banter.

Speaker 19 (42:45):
Makeing Christmas stay and see.

Speaker 8 (42:52):
I guess I gotta say giving them the benefit of
the doubt, you know, just because your mom's friend Tony
the hairdresser was gay and like to appear as Santa.
He's playing a character, right, Yes, it doesn't necessarily make
Santa gay, not at all.

Speaker 3 (43:09):
Via the transit of property. Maybe he was he in
especially butch Santa. You said he leaned into it. He leaned, Yeah,
yeah he was. I'm here at Dacia Halls. He definitely
FEMEDI Santa. Oh bit, you know what I mean?

Speaker 8 (43:24):
Yeah, he was living his best life. He could only
be so straight. He was a very flamboyant man, big
huge dude.

Speaker 3 (43:32):
But yeah, it was not a guy you'd want to
trifle with. No God, no right, no, no, no no.
That's why the six inch heels things very funny. Thank you,
by the way, whoever sent me this. We've played the
clip on occasion of the guy who built his own
flying machine, that's what he calls it. Yeah, and he

(43:52):
crashes it in the desert and calls nine to one
one me please.

Speaker 20 (43:57):
I crashed my flying machine.

Speaker 3 (44:00):
Somebody auto tuned it. Have you seen that the flying
machine auto tune? You want to talk about festive? You know,
isn't it fun that someone else's near death experience can
become fodder for our entertainment. Isn't that great? Hey, we

(44:23):
didn't tell you to film yourself, bro, we didn't tell
you to film the whole thing and post it. I
think that guy's okay, but he was in bad shape.

Speaker 20 (44:30):
By the way, I please, I crashed my flying machine.

Speaker 3 (44:54):
The Enchanted Hills.

Speaker 20 (44:55):
I'm in the desert.

Speaker 3 (44:56):
He was in the Enchanted Hills desert there in Texas,
and his name was Anthony Vella and it's called a paramotor,
and he was a guy on YouTube and he was
in the hospital for quite a while. So again it
sounds very dramatic, but this is a guy who like fell.

(45:17):
He was at like one hundred feet okay. He's a
thirty three year old guys, a veteran, and he was
tranded in the desert for like an hour. And he
was in bad shape. Because at the beginning of that
video he's flying, He's like whoo, and then obviously you know,
he was doing like fifty in the air and he
fell about one hundred feet, and then he posted video

(45:39):
of himself from the from the hospital bed and oh god,
crash my flying machine. I mean that's the one that
everybody remembers.

Speaker 21 (45:50):
AZERI call nine one one.

Speaker 20 (46:03):
Please, I crashed my flying machine, Hills.

Speaker 3 (46:12):
I mean no, not one of us knows how we
would react. It still feels very over the top, like
he snapped his arm and he was in bad shape.
But he's like, I mean, like, bro, first of all,
you're by yourself. I mean, you know, he probably had

(46:33):
My guess is he couldn't breathe very well. He probably
had a lung issue. Yeah, crash. Yeah, and that's a
hell of a height to fall from.

Speaker 8 (46:39):
Yeah, so he's probably, But he's not Aaron Ralston, you
know what I mean.

Speaker 3 (46:43):
He's not gonna have to cut his arm off pen night.
So I'm guessing the sounds were warranted. Yeah, I would imagine,
But I've never crashed my flying machine. I haven't either.
Knock on Wood is still intact. Yeah. So, and you
don't take yourself yours out very you know, in the
winter time, the air is dense. He so, yeah, no,
now it's it's it's put away for the year in

(47:03):
the garage getting ready to move.

Speaker 20 (47:05):
Yeah, please, I crashed my flying machine.

Speaker 3 (47:11):
Because she goes on to ask him. She's trying to
get the information, and he's like a paramotor. So that's
why he said flying machine because he knew when he
said paramotor, she's gonna be like, I don't know what
the hell you're talking about. So he was kind of
enough where with all the not confuse the woman take
the shortcut. Yeah, yeah, Aziri, call nine and by the way,

(47:32):
I've edited this for you. He tells Siri half a
dozen times to call nine one one, and it's doing nothing.
So he's like, ah, because I think he didn't have
he couldn't use his arms, right, Like no, well, you
can see him in the video like get his phone
in front of him and then yeah, so yeah, he
was in the hospital for a minute.

Speaker 8 (48:02):
I don't want to mention it. I believe I crashed
my flying machine. But again, Rob, somebody took this and
auto tuned it. This guy posted it. It was online
because he's a YouTuber.

Speaker 3 (48:14):
That's what you're doing. You're posting content and obviously got
a lot of eyeballs. H Hopefully whatever revenue he generated
from that video helped all set or defray the cost
of his hospitalization because he was in there for a minute.
But somebody took that and auto tuned it. Yeah, so good.
A near death experience, it is, which is why I

(48:34):
played it for you. You, but big picture, that guy's
near death experience has been commodified for us.

Speaker 8 (48:42):
Yes, you mentioned watching Squid Game made me. Netflix made
me think. Did you watch the new Frankenstein?

Speaker 3 (48:49):
No? Oh my goodness, I think you should.

Speaker 8 (48:53):
I really, I'd love to get your take on it,
because I really, really really enjoyed it.

Speaker 3 (48:57):
I really like everybody in it. I don't I don't
know who Jacob Alordie is. I know he's kind of
like a dude of the moment. I assume he's from
like one of those like he's like from a YA
show or something, right, I got them played that. The
dude that plays the monster, Well, he was in Saltburn,
the movie Saltburn. Okay, again, I know the name. I
know the show. I just no, that's not for me

(49:19):
as I watched that. Nope, I'm not a sixteen year
old girl show. But I know he's in that show.
But you, this is what I'm saying. I know the
name in the face. Have never seen him in anything. Yeah,
he's uh that I a wild pick. I mean good
for him, but you know, it was very, very good.
I thought it's Frankenstein. Correct. I watched it with Melissa

(49:39):
and my oldest Caitlin over the weekend. It was awesome.
I heard it's really long two and a half hours. Yeah,
not crazy, but I do like that Christoph Vaults. I
like him a lot. I think Oscar Isaac is great. Yeah.
I don't know who else is in it. Me a
goth plays she's the female leader it. Yeah, yeah, she
plays Lady Elizabeth. Oh all right, oh maybe I will.

(50:02):
I loved it. If I have a spare two and
a half hours, Alan, screw that list of fun cities.
Cleveland has the one and only Captain Fun. Thank you
Rob your shirt that hm. I do what I can, Alan.
I once got a free lap dance from a stripper
because she liked my cologne. I wear Abercrombie Fierce. That's

(50:26):
like the second or third person to name drop Abercrombie Fierce. Really,
somebody else said it's about twenty years old now, and
I have never met a female who doesn't absolutely love
the Senate. It that's Maleman Kirk. So, ladies, if you're
out there, he wants to drop a letter in your mailbox.
Uh okay, Abercrombie Fierce never heard of it. But again,

(50:51):
I assume that that's the scent that you get when
you walk into one of their stores, if those are
still around, right, you're punched in the face with a
cloud of cologne. I wonder if that's what it is.
I don't know. I am However, the next time doctor
Ryan Bergland is in here for our segment called is
It Red, I am going to inquire about my brother

(51:12):
in law's thick scrote them. Yeah. I think it's a
logical question.

Speaker 15 (51:16):
Hmm.

Speaker 3 (51:16):
That's all I've been thinking about. I can't get past
my brother in law's thick scrotum's Yeah. I want to
shake the man, the hand of the man, shake hand
of the man. Al And I work in finance. I
look at a lot of banking transactions. Saw one today
from Monroe carry Out, and of course I did the

(51:39):
voice in my head right right.

Speaker 22 (51:42):
I spent last year and only on New York twenty
three to twenty four at Wagner College, and then his
freshman at sophomore years at Monroe College. Have you ever
watched the show Ted Night on ABC Too Close for
Comfort am? And he would come into the room and
address of his daughters, and then the.

Speaker 3 (51:59):
Guy Louida Monroe, everybody, my cousin's there at ESPN.

Speaker 6 (52:06):
Thank you, Mike.

Speaker 1 (52:08):
The Allen Carr Show on one hundred points of it.

Speaker 23 (52:15):
You know, you think this guy's gonna do one thing, y,
he does another thing. Then a third thing happens, and
it's a bummer because you kind just want him to
keep doing that middle thing.

Speaker 3 (52:28):
He's all very frustrating.

Speaker 1 (52:31):
The Allen Cox Show WMMS.

Speaker 8 (52:41):
Well, the Indiana Pacers came in handy for the Caves
to break their slide. The Caves had lost three in
a row, one thirty five to one nineteen last night.
Pacers aren't good, but you never know what'll happen on
a random Monday night. So the Calves go to thirteen nine.

Speaker 3 (53:01):
Pacers remain at only four wins for the season, and
the Cavs are back here at home tomorrow night. Off Tonight,
they will host the Portland Trail Blazers Tomorrow night, seven
o'clock tip off, six point thirty pre game here on WMMS.
The they were talking about trading jareded Allen to the Pacers,

(53:25):
right I saw that. Yeah, Yeah, well rumors rumors, yeah,
but people will right up rumored proposed trades and things
like that that a guy from the Pacers would come
to the Cavaliers, a guy named Obi Toppin, and I

(53:45):
guess he was killing it early on, and then he
hurt himself early in the season. I mean, we're barely
into the season, so that would be like right away,
this got hurt. I got hurt anyway, and then Jarrett
Allen would be sent to the Indiana Pacers in this
theoretical proposed deal. And I'm listening in my car and

(54:08):
my phone heard you play the guy who crashed his
flying machine, and it called nine one one in my car,
and I had to explain to the nine one one
lady that I don't need nine to one one really
series always listening, Yeah, but for it to do that,
that seems a bit much. Yeah. There was a lady

(54:29):
in North Carolina. One of our bureau chiefs down there
in North Carolina sent me the story about the lady
who called nine to one one because she was driving
and an eagle dropped a cat through her windshield, so
you got well, just form that visual in your mind.
Right minutes prior a family loses their cat to an

(54:53):
eagle and then it loses the cat and falls through
the woman's windshield.

Speaker 2 (55:00):
Okay, you may not believe me, but I just kind
of botted eagle drop a cat through my windshield. It
absolutely shattered my windshield.

Speaker 5 (55:07):
I do believe you, honestly.

Speaker 3 (55:09):
Why would you make that up? I know, no, I
believe you. It's too stupid to make up. I like, man,
there's a pterodactyl.

Speaker 8 (55:17):
It just dropped a rhinoceros through the back window of
my car, and I believe it.

Speaker 3 (55:23):
It didn't really happen at Shunser may talk to you.
This is I was just lonely.

Speaker 8 (55:29):
You might not believe me, but man, this North Carolina,
we believe all kinds of weird stuff have hapen.

Speaker 3 (55:34):
This ain't even the weirdest call I got this week.
And bold eagle drop a cat through your windshield? Please
tell me something that hadn't already happened this week.

Speaker 2 (55:41):
Take a number absolutely shattered my windshield.

Speaker 8 (55:45):
I do believe you, honestly.

Speaker 5 (55:48):
Oh my goodness, I've heard crazier.

Speaker 2 (55:52):
Well that's right.

Speaker 5 (55:54):
Yeah, another question, is the cat still alive?

Speaker 2 (55:59):
No, it is, but it's on the side of the road.

Speaker 5 (56:02):
Okay, I have to ask to make sure.

Speaker 3 (56:05):
I gotta anth to make sure that cat's all alive.

Speaker 13 (56:07):
If he isn't alive, if it is still alive, any
chance you mind picking it up, putting it aside. I
got thirteen friends at home that would just adore or
another baby, brothers, sister.

Speaker 3 (56:19):
I'll tell you what though, that would be wild. I mean,
fortunate for her. It dropped into the passenger side of
the car. But still, Hey, you might not believe me, ma'am.
You know nine one one operators these days are so
happy to not be talking to somebody who's screaming because
Wendy's didn't put cheese on their cheeseburger. That's what people

(56:43):
are using nine you know.

Speaker 8 (56:45):
Up in Canada, I was watching a thing on the
CBC a couple of weeks ago, and there was this
guy who is was trying to explain to the public, Hey,
we're going to be using AI a lot more in
nine to one one emergency call situations, so that it
can point people into the right place and so that

(57:08):
we're not going to have our human nine to one
one operators and dispatchers dealing with people who don't have
real emergencies.

Speaker 3 (57:15):
You know, that to me is like an area of
AI where you go, Yeah, that makes sense, Like that's
a useful application of that. Right, So when people call
and you get a human and you go, hey, I
ordered eight nuggets and they only gave me seven, you're like,
this is an emergency. Yeah, cool, thanks, Yeah, here's a
new number to call, right, one eight hundred. Get a

(57:35):
light Tell like, Canada is that different than us?

Speaker 24 (57:38):
Right?

Speaker 3 (57:38):
They got plenty of dummies up there too. Call a
nine to one one. Boy. I wasn't a nine to
one one situation, but I ordered some salads over the weekend, Rob,
and I you know, I did my diligence. Sometimes I
feel like Peshi and Lethal Weapon, where he's like the
FI and the drive through, the FI and the drive through. Right, Yeah,
I did. I guess what I could do. It's this

(57:58):
place that I order from, a occasionally a Mediterranean place.
The salads are dynamite, but they ain't cheap anymore.

Speaker 7 (58:05):
Boy.

Speaker 3 (58:06):
Anyway, I call and I order a few of them,
and I check the ticket. It's already paid for, So
I just go in pick it up, check the ticket,
make sure everything is correct, get in the car, go home,
and I open up the two chicken salads that had
no chicken. Oh I love it.

Speaker 8 (58:25):
Yeah, so I again anytime I don't undo the bag,
look in the thing, walk it back in.

Speaker 3 (58:32):
Did you have to go back? I didn't go back.
I called them and I said, I need you to
refund this whole thing because the chicken salads. And this
wasn't like, you know, your chicken salad mixed like you're
making a chicken salad, sandwich, Mediterranean salads with chicken. It's
in the name Sun's Chicken. Well ironically, the third there

(58:53):
were three salads. The one that I ordered was a
salad that you had to add chicken too if you
wanted it. That one they got. But the two that
are fundamentally chicken salad, uh, didn't have any chicken. Oh,
I see your chicken right here, sir. Sorry. Well, and
I get this poor kid on the phone, okay, and

(59:16):
then this chipper woman gets on and I tell her
the exact same thing I told you. I'll tell you
what I just told Hunter. There's no chicken. Oh, we
are so sorry about that. Yeah, did we remember to
include the tubuli. I don't know if what the bully

(59:37):
but still said Mediterraneans firs. I know, well they've got
a very broad menu. Rub ah. Yeah. So anyway, that
lady a cat jump seemingly. I mean, imagine that immediate reaction.
You don't know what happened yet the cat just comes
through the windshill of your car.

Speaker 20 (59:55):
To get at.

Speaker 3 (59:58):
A dead bloody cat his through the windshield of your car.

Speaker 8 (01:00:03):
The woman laughing was a bit much too. The nine
one one operator like she was a bit too cheery
for the incident for someone who was panic stricken.

Speaker 3 (01:00:11):
Well, I'm freaked out. Yeah, but the lady didn't sound
even the lady calling her, she could probably tell that
the lady didn't sound she didn't sound like the flying
machine gun. No, but she could tell she was still
like she was. Just had a cat fly through a
windshield at high speed. I mean that's enough to one.

Speaker 2 (01:00:29):
Okay, you may not believe me, but I just kind
of bottle eagle drop a cat through my windshield and
it absolutely shattered my windshield.

Speaker 5 (01:00:36):
I do believe you, honestly. Oh my goodness, I've heard crazier.

Speaker 3 (01:00:42):
Yeah, she does laugh does a bit much shaky. Well,
you know, at least it didn't happen to me. I'm
gonna send somebody out there for you. Well, there's so
folks he down there in the Carolinas, rob Maybe that's
just how they do things down there. Stop laughing at me, Marianne.

Speaker 8 (01:00:59):
Last week my brother got killed by truck and cut
him in two. So I've heard weirder.

Speaker 3 (01:01:05):
Well, the interesting part of that whole thing was there
was a cat there too.

Speaker 8 (01:01:09):
Remember the guy that got splattered in RoboCop.

Speaker 3 (01:01:15):
After the acid.

Speaker 8 (01:01:17):
Fell on him and he stood up and the car
ran him over and he was just a mutant and
it splattered like a watermelon on the That's what has
exploded that guy, remember him? He sploded all over the lame.
Hey Bob, Yes, how are you?

Speaker 3 (01:01:37):
Bob?

Speaker 20 (01:01:38):
All right?

Speaker 17 (01:01:39):
How you doing?

Speaker 3 (01:01:40):
Hanging in?

Speaker 1 (01:01:41):
I called bearing breaking news for you?

Speaker 3 (01:01:45):
Wows? I do like breaking Newton. Now are you sure
that this is news that's going to be broken here.

Speaker 15 (01:01:53):
For you?

Speaker 21 (01:01:54):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (01:01:54):
Okay, will probably know what I'm talking about. There's a
store on Route eighteen.

Speaker 3 (01:02:00):
I'm a Dina called Buellers.

Speaker 7 (01:02:01):
Yeah, they carry lou Malnoddy's pizza.

Speaker 3 (01:02:07):
Oh wow, Yeah, not breaking news. I don't think that.
I will absolutely pick.

Speaker 1 (01:02:13):
Every time he talks, well, every time Alan talks about it.

Speaker 24 (01:02:16):
He gets it from Chicago and pays like baby Bucks.

Speaker 3 (01:02:19):
No I haven't. Heinens has been carrying it for about
a year and a half, so I get it from Heinens. Listen,
you got a life, You got a life to lead, Bob,
you can't listen every single second.

Speaker 8 (01:02:28):
I appreciate the update. That's where I do my shop,
and I'll pick one up. Where's that Bullers route eighteen
o cowh God for you? Still so hard for me
to say route and not root root? I say root
do you yeah? Like the Gary friend sliptnot hey listen?

Speaker 10 (01:02:46):
Uh no?

Speaker 3 (01:02:47):
They The manager at the Heinens down here one or
two years ago was kind enough to drop off some
lou Mal Noddies frozen pizzas for me with a post it,
and it was like, stop paying thirty dollars a pie
because I would. I'd have them frozen and shipped from Chicago.
And then do they taste the same? Though? I think
they taste great? Really? Yeah. Again, I'm not a big

(01:03:07):
deep dish guy, but the frozen version isn't like the
full deep dish door stop of cheese. They're a little thinner.

Speaker 8 (01:03:16):
See my favorite. If I don't eat pizza often obviously,
but when I do, if I can get them. The
Walmart in Wadsworth carries Cape Cod pizzas. They're frozen, small
round pizzas from a pizzeria that I've been to numerous
times out on Cape Cod.

Speaker 3 (01:03:34):
And those like if you're gonna eat that's not Connecticut style,
is it. No, it's just like a New Haven or yes,
sort of more pub style. It's a little round, small
disc pizzas. Yeah, they're delicious. Listen, it's a golden age
for people who give a fat frog's ass about Chicago
pizza because there are a lot of companies that are

(01:03:55):
selling frozen Nick and Tony's and Connies with Connie's pizza.
What you get at at like sports arenas in Chicago,
everybody sells Connie's pizza. They have him now, like local
grocery store sell them in the frozen. So it's it's
an embarrassment of riches as it were, Hey.

Speaker 4 (01:04:14):
Don, hello there, Hi Don, what's going?

Speaker 3 (01:04:21):
What's up? I have a problem with this eagle thing.
I live.

Speaker 4 (01:04:29):
Right on the Canadian border and I've seen more eagles
than most people ever would, Okay, And I know once
they latch onto something and carry it, they can't let
it go till they land. They can't unquench it.

Speaker 3 (01:04:45):
I have to think Don, that this woman probably had
no she probably just pulled bald eagle out of her ass.
She's like, all I know is a cat fell through,
and clearly that happened because a bird was carrying it.
So she probably didn't, you know, in that immediate after
I doubt she looked out and saw a bald eagle.
Could have been a hawk. A hawk, yeah, a hawk.

(01:05:05):
They did they show a picture or anything? No, no, no,
she was just saying, a bald eagle.

Speaker 17 (01:05:11):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:05:11):
One of our one of our people in North Carolina
sent me the story and it was just a nine
to one one call. So she I mean again, bald
eagle is a strange thing to just pull out automatically.
But yeah, where I'm sorry, Don, you said where on
the Canadian border you were living.

Speaker 25 (01:05:30):
It's called Grand Murray, Okay, And uh, it's only got
thirteen hundred people in it, A bit cool little town
that's busy all summer.

Speaker 3 (01:05:40):
And this is this is in Minnesota. Yeah, yeah, okay, gotcha.
My my ex, my ex sister in law is from Duluth,
so I've I don't know, I've heard of some of that.
You're like near thunder Bay. Yeah, quite a bit, alfa there, Yeah, okay,

(01:06:01):
all right, good Rob. Don is on record as being
a skeptical of this whole bald eagle situation. It would
never drop a cat, Don, Had you ever seen an
eagle actually grab a smaller animal and take off with it?

Speaker 14 (01:06:16):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (01:06:17):
Yeah, yeah, that's I say. I've never seen an eagle
drop something that I've already latched down to.

Speaker 8 (01:06:24):
Yeah right, okay, all right, thank you, Don, I appreciate it.
Don humble bragtice there a little bit. I'm the more
eagles than anybody.

Speaker 16 (01:06:32):
You know.

Speaker 3 (01:06:34):
Well, there's two things there. A don't know, Don b
I fully believe him, without question.

Speaker 17 (01:06:40):
I do.

Speaker 3 (01:06:41):
I could count on one hand the eagles I saw.
Although I did meet Don Felder one time, Rob, ironically
enough ala cock show on social media.

Speaker 8 (01:06:51):
The one eagle I've met, Don Felder, h huh yeah,
never met the others, all right?

Speaker 3 (01:06:56):
I met Joe Walsh. Oh gee, sound that's the one,
Don Felder. Joe Wash the one you want to meet Helly.
Maybe Glenn Frye was the one I wanted to meet.
Really yeah, from the wash it came up with I
love all those guys. Half of the trip I made
back after I went to see my daughter in the
Grapes of Wrath at Michigan State. I was listening to

(01:07:16):
Eagles the entire way back. I just got into a
thing with Eagles. I don't know, I did you know?
I'm no Jeff Lebowski in that regard a Mike Yo,
what Mike hey? Hey, just uh.

Speaker 15 (01:07:34):
Just wanted to point out the fact that Alan's talking
about his chicken salad. Yes, sir, with no with no chicken. Yes,
my mother used to make city chicken all the time, Okay.
And it wasn't chicken.

Speaker 3 (01:07:52):
It was pork. Yeah, and it wasn't chicken. Well, no,
you always get what you want. Well, this was a chicken.
It wasn't a city chicken salad. Mike, I take your point,
But what your your mother grew up in the depression,
I assume, Yes, yeah, city chicken was whatever was running around.

(01:08:16):
Oh okay, yeah, okay, So she got you the skewers
and them, yeah, correct.

Speaker 15 (01:08:21):
And we cooked them all and she cooked them all
and yeah, but it was kind of funny because I
still can't believe people do not understand the fact that
city Chicken is not chicken.

Speaker 3 (01:08:31):
Well, yes, but okay, right, yes, right, thank you Mike.
Right third time, definitely got that point.

Speaker 8 (01:08:37):
City Chicken is like kind of a you know, it's
a it's a little fun thing, like, oh, hey, we
grew up in the you know. But if a thing says, hey,
it's a chicken salad, it didn't say city Chicken.

Speaker 3 (01:08:48):
Well didn't you.

Speaker 8 (01:08:48):
By the way, it didn't have just for his edification,
it didn't have any meat on it. If they had said, oh, Sody,
it's Cydney Chicken.

Speaker 3 (01:08:56):
It's real, I would have been like, oh, I misread,
even though I've ordered from you numerous times before, one
like that, Well, didn't you learn about city Chicken from
Sean Connery, Alan, Shitty chicken is the most delicious chicken.
Sometimes you have to slap a chicken across the face.
Shitty chicken. It's an acquired taste. It's not the shame

(01:09:20):
thing you'd think. You see, it's not chicken at all.
It's Parkerville little cubes on skewers they call it shitty
Chicken as a joke. As a joke. It's a joke.
You see, my grandmother grew up in a depression. We've
got some Brian. Yes, yeah, now you'll probably know this.
This is going way back. I only know this because

(01:09:41):
it was one of my mom and dad's favorite bands.
And my dad was not a guy who had favorite bands,
so I have to infer that. He said he liked
them because my mom liked them. City Chicken, by the way,
in his defense, that is very much like a regional thing.
That is a Cleveland Witsburgh type thing. Eerie, Pa, here's

(01:10:04):
some Brian. He's going way back. I'm talking late sixties.

Speaker 26 (01:10:07):
There's just no guinea.

Speaker 6 (01:10:10):
Over you o my mad oh the pot.

Speaker 23 (01:10:17):
Just no giddy o.

Speaker 3 (01:10:21):
Bells. You stump me? Okay. Do you remember a band
called Gary Pucket and the Union Gap.

Speaker 1 (01:10:28):
I do.

Speaker 3 (01:10:29):
Jess has never heard of this before. No, inform me
Gary Pucket in the Union Gap. This guy is still alive.
He's eighty three. He probably tore solo band, but they
had a bunch of hits in the late sixties.

Speaker 8 (01:10:42):
Young Girl. It was all about young girls, get out of,
Get out of. They had a song called Lady will Power.
You can figure out what that's about. He's like, oh
you never heard about the Birds and the Bees. I
would love to show you. I mean so much willpower.
Oh my god, Oh yeah, this girl is gid. Yes,
this girl is a woman. Now, Brian whipped out over You.

(01:11:06):
The song I think the song is called over You.
By the way, this guy's hooked. The reason was called
He grew up near a town called Union Gap. But
when they got signed to a record label late sixties,
him and a bunch of other guys, the affectation was
they dressed like Union soldiers. I don't know why, but
they were on like the Ed Sullivan Show. They sold

(01:11:27):
more records than any other band in the late sixties.
Gary Pucket in the Union Gap were selling millions of records.
My parents love these guys.

Speaker 26 (01:11:37):
There's just no guineas over you, my mod all.

Speaker 27 (01:11:44):
This just no guinny over.

Speaker 3 (01:11:53):
Yeah. I mean he's had right, he's having his way
with Gary Puckett and the Union Gap. But that's the
one that Brian pulled out is called over You. I
would have thought more Lady willpower from Brian, Lady willpower
and something else. It's no, no, right, it's now or never.

(01:12:14):
Imagine that, lady, try whipping lady willpower on a young lady. Now, yeah,
it's now or never. Hey, did you learn about the
birds and the bees? Because I would love to tell her.
Tell you of the facts of life.

Speaker 8 (01:12:30):
The fact life.

Speaker 3 (01:12:34):
Well, there's so much you have to and I gladly
teach you. Let's take it creepier, ladly teach you.

Speaker 8 (01:12:49):
Mean? Dude had a great voice, right, good voice, heavy
tambourine in the late sixties. No oh god, this I
feel like I'm five years old.

Speaker 6 (01:13:04):
Man.

Speaker 3 (01:13:04):
My mom was playing Gary Puckett in The Union Gap
non stop boy, the facts of life? How about that? Missus?
Garrett stuck a carrot in her butt and that's wow.
Who here's so rid? Keep singing? He's all the facts
of life. That's a Sean Hayes deep diving for you.

Speaker 1 (01:13:26):
The Allen Corr Show on one hundred seven called the
Allan Cox Show.

Speaker 3 (01:13:34):
It's for living out radio workplace fantasies.

Speaker 5 (01:13:36):
And if I have to explain that to you, it's
clear you don't deserve it.

Speaker 17 (01:13:39):
Two six seven eight one double oh seven or one
three four eight one double oh seven.

Speaker 8 (01:13:50):
Rob the Little Joe Walsh from to Eagles in City, well,
Humber Points, Summit family or a ba.

Speaker 3 (01:13:58):
Well don This is a Joe Walsh song that he
gave to the Eagles. Remember this was in the movie
The Warriors.

Speaker 8 (01:14:13):
Joe Walsh did in the City for the Warriors and
then the Eagles who were having a hard time.

Speaker 3 (01:14:18):
I think with the Long Run, and he's like, I
got this song. And that was the first one with
Timothy B. Schmidt was the Long Run. Imagine that I've
got this song. Yeah, just sitting here.

Speaker 8 (01:14:33):
I mean, if you guess you guys can give it
a shot if you want in the city, just sitting
in your pocket.

Speaker 3 (01:14:38):
Yeah.

Speaker 8 (01:14:39):
And they were whether or not you like the Eagles, Eagles, sorry,
whether or not you like Eagles. Those guys were so
every single one of them so goddamn talented. They were
all writing songs, they were all performing songs.

Speaker 15 (01:14:53):
You know.

Speaker 3 (01:14:53):
They brought Timothy B. Schmidt in, who had replaced Randy Meisner.
Randy Meisner sang PRIs icily one song. Randy Meisner sang
take it to the limit. Did he really? Yeah, the
whole thing, Randy Meisner saying take it to It's the
only Eagle song Randy Meiser sang, Let's take it to
the limit. Great song. Timothy be Schmidt comes in with

(01:15:17):
I Can't Tell You Why, which was a massive hit
from the Long Run. But all these guys just had
great voices, so you could go to any one of them.
Now they have Vince Gil, they have Glenn Fry's kid.
The band never knew this wasn't one of the Yeah,
Randy Meiser, Henry or something. This is the last Felder

(01:15:40):
album too, because they fired him. I think Long Run
was the last album they did. I don't think they
knew it at the time, but they were like, we
got to get the hell out of here and away
from each other, and you know, but great, yeah, and
very kind of unrepresentative of what were really doing because

(01:16:01):
the tempo of this song, it's essentially a waltz and
so the time signature on it. Randy Meisner brings it
to them and they go, this isn't really kind of
the vibe that we're doing.

Speaker 8 (01:16:13):
But they did it because it was pretty collaborative. Though
those guys butted heads. It worked, yeah, and then Timothy B.
Schmidt came in to replace Randy Meisner, but they had
a bunch of hits off this record, you know, take
it to the limit one more time, right, Jess, is

(01:16:40):
any of that old stuff scratch you?

Speaker 3 (01:16:41):
This is probably stuff your parents were listening to this. Yeah,
Eagles love them. Don Henley, Don Henley, who's a real
That guy's a real firecracker boy. He's a guy who
got to be kind of a crusty old git. But
he's from Texas, you know what I mean, Like you
carry that with you all the time. But just the
stuff that he had, gle and Fry did Man and

(01:17:01):
Joe Walsh, all those guys.

Speaker 5 (01:17:04):
Residency in Vegas right now. Probably I think it was
Joe Walsh or someone. Oh my god, he sounded bad.
I think it was. I don't want to say it
was him, but it was one of them, and he
was really pushing the vocals and it was not good.

Speaker 3 (01:17:20):
Eagles doing Yeah at the Sphere. God, I would love
to go to that me too.

Speaker 17 (01:17:26):
Man.

Speaker 3 (01:17:26):
They're doing end of January, end of February, end of March,
basically the last three days of the months there. I
love to go to that. Let's grab some tickets. Eagles
at Venetian. I wonder if iHeartMedia could hit us up.

Speaker 8 (01:17:45):
Oh, totally take care of us. They'd sponsor us there,
broadcast from there. They take simple I'll make a call,
say what road trip?

Speaker 15 (01:17:58):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (01:17:59):
Yeah. In anatol car I mentioned eagles because everybody has
blown me up on the text. They're like, hey, Don,
seems nice. Eagles drop things all the time. Don called
us because I used to live in Grandmary, Minnesota, or
any of the Canadian border, and once an eagle gets
its talons in something, it ain't gonna drop it. And

(01:18:21):
everybody's like, eagles drop crap all the time. If they
scooped it up and they didn't have a good grip,
it's gonna fall. Now. I'm no ornithologist, nor am I
an theologist, so when you're talking about eagle v fish,
and a fish obviously is lighter than a cat. It
came from the somebody at one of our bureau chiefs

(01:18:43):
in North Carolina sent me the nine to one one
call about the woman who called because an eagle had
dropped a cat through her windshield. And Don called and said,
I've what was his life? I've seen more eagles than anybody,
you know? Was his line. I take him at his
work because I you know, eagles don't normally come up

(01:19:04):
in conversation with me and other people. But I gotta
tell you, I'm gonna start working it in. I'm always
looking for new avenues rob to engage with the public.
And so next time I meet somebody in public, we'll
dispense with a small talk and I'm gonna get right
to hey, hey, hey, did you know how many eagles

(01:19:26):
have you seen? And they'll probably most of them will
probably go I don't want or two what's the normal norm?

Speaker 16 (01:19:33):
You know?

Speaker 3 (01:19:33):
Okay, here's a good example. So I'm still renting my car. Right,
they're still working on my car. So I'm still driving
my rental from Enterprise, which is a what what kind
of car?

Speaker 13 (01:19:43):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (01:19:44):
It's a Dodge Durango. Oh I love it. Anyway, I
call this morning to extend my reservation that the insurance
company is paying for it. I just need to let
them know how long I'm gonna have it. So I
call and talk to this kid on the other end
of the line, and before we finish our business, he goes, hey, FYI,

(01:20:04):
my dad and I are huge fans of the show.
And I say, oh, thank you so much. This is
the Enterprise guy. The Enterprise in Avon kidnamed Blake. He goes, Hey,
my dad and I are big fans. I got a
picture with you years ago into Monsters Game. I think
my dad. I go, oh, that's great, thank you so much.
I appreciate it. That's very nice.

Speaker 8 (01:20:22):
I should have then in there said, oh, by the way, Blake,
how many eagles have you ever seen?

Speaker 3 (01:20:29):
But that was before today's show.

Speaker 8 (01:20:31):
But imagine if his response was more than anybody you know,
then what would you have done. Then you would have
had two people with the same claim.

Speaker 3 (01:20:37):
That would be crazy, and he would have gotten to
me before this other guy. Then this dude would have
just messed you all up. Be like, I don't know,
I know this dude. Blake and Enterprises are in the
car and he says he's seen it and his dude's
seen a lot of eagles. Boy, all I got in
my backyard is crows. And when they're together, Rob, if

(01:20:57):
you'll pardon my heart to heart, it's.

Speaker 7 (01:21:04):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:21:05):
Alan Gary Puckett is probably headlining the moon Dog Ball.

Speaker 8 (01:21:09):
With Peter Noon. They haven't done that. What was the
last time that Magic did the moon Dog Ball. It's
a long time, a long time. Last year they tied
onto a or a year before. Maybe they tied onto
a bunch of shows and they called it like the
Something moon Dog Concert series. Back in the day, they
used to do this big annual show. This is the
picture of Smokey we have that right in the kitchenka.

Speaker 3 (01:21:32):
Yeah, that's right, Smokey Robinson from the from the moon
Dog Ball Coronation. That's a core a Nation Ball. I
think it was an Alan Freed reference, right, Moondog or something. Yeah,
and they grabbed all the oldies bands. Yeah, Allan. I
spent a couple of years the Lake Erie Correctional Institution

(01:21:55):
and we would have Yardbird every couple of weeks. It
also happened the same day that the Seagulls disappeared. Yardbird. Yeah.
They'd played Jimmy Page music in the background and they
tuck into some Yardbird. Hey, this is pretty good. Where'd
this come from? Don't ask? It's the new Yardbirds. Yeah,

(01:22:16):
it pairs nice with jencom prison.

Speaker 8 (01:22:21):
Yes, I got some turn it one. Thanksgivin hay Chanoka.
Happy Chinooka, Allan.

Speaker 3 (01:22:35):
According to that guy, you shouldn't be disappointed the next
time you order a bear claw there's actually no bear
in it. The same goes for monkey Bread Alan. The
Vince Gill version of Eagles is not good. It's not
a vibe. Yeah, but I don't know much about Vince Gill,
so you can plug that guy in and it's not
gonna bum me out. I would have very much liked
to have seen Eagles when they were all still together.

(01:22:56):
It's hard to believe that their big reunion tour was
nineteen ninety six The Hell Freezes Over to you. Yeah,
Hell Freezes Over because guys hated each other's guts. They're like,
we are never. Great title for an album for a
reunion by the way, they're like, we will never You
know how Motley Crue told everybody they would never do
it again and they didn't do it again. Eagles were
the precursor to that, and then they just called it

(01:23:17):
the Haha, got you Bitch Tour? Did you the bass?

Speaker 8 (01:23:21):
In the beginning of the acoustic version of Hotel California?
On Hell Freezes Over? That may be one of the
best intros to a song ever, is that?

Speaker 3 (01:23:32):
Timothy B. Schmidt?

Speaker 8 (01:23:33):
It's yeah, yeah, it's what's when they all got back together.
On that Hell Freezes Over. It's a long intro. We
played the acoustic version for years on the radio station
at forty time.

Speaker 3 (01:23:42):
This is so good. This was live on MTV in
nineteen ninety four. That shows you how far away we've
gotten from music television. This was during grunge and they
had Eagles live on MTV. I would say, on top
of it being the best intro, it's also probably the
best crowd pop when they figure out what it is

(01:24:03):
they're doing when they switch. Oh, it's so good. Do
I have to listen to all this? No, you can
skip ahead. There's a lot of happy boomers, happy boomers,

(01:24:34):
Holy cow, a lot of white in that room too,
you know that. Oh yeah, yeah, well anyway, Yeah, it's
not for everybody, but I dig them. I love that album.
Yeah there was. There was a book I read last
year on a flight, the flight out and the flight back.

(01:24:56):
I read the entire book halfway there and half on
the way back, called rock Me on the Water, which
is named after a Jackson Brown song. But the book
is about life and culture and music and art in
nineteen seventy four. Specifically, it's called the Year Los Angeles
Transformed music, movies, television, and politics, and Eagles are featured

(01:25:20):
prominently in this book warts and all, and it's a
it's a wild book if you're into any of those
kinds of things that talk about like films at the time,
that Chinatown and Jane Fonda and Tom Hayden and politics.
And it's called Rock Me on the Water. Just an
amazing book. Just mentioned Jackson Brown. His kid just died.
Did you see that?

Speaker 8 (01:25:40):
No, Yeah, Ethan Brown, his son. Really it was Thanksgiving
or something like that, he died. They everybody Ethan is
still alive, right different Ethan? Yeah, yeah, good.

Speaker 3 (01:25:48):
Sure, Ethan Brown dead at fifty two, yeap actor and
a model. Well that sucks, it really does. He was
very prominent in the Warren Zevon universe. You know, Warren
zvon just got inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall
of Fame, and Jackson Brown was like a longtime friend
and collaborator with him, and so he was always featured
very prominently and in any conversation about Warren zevonn and

(01:26:08):
vice versa. Frankly, Jackson Brown. Wow, that's that sikes. Yeah,
I remember I saw it at Thanksgiving. I was having
cooking dinner or something that popped up. Well, the kid's
mom killed herself way back when the kid was little. Yeah, yeah,
Jackson Brown's girlfriend at the time. No, I did not

(01:26:31):
see that. That's a bummer. I did see that. Miley,
you know the the it's not even a running joke.
She gets told all the time, jess that she sounds
like Miley Cyrus. I saw that. Your doppelganger just got engaged. Yeah,
I saw that. Now is this exciting for our own

(01:26:52):
Jessica Ann Hutchinson, I absolutely not.

Speaker 15 (01:26:55):
Yeah, it was.

Speaker 5 (01:26:56):
I was like, oh my god, my bestie, my I
called her up and I was like, girl, congrats.

Speaker 17 (01:27:03):
Yes.

Speaker 3 (01:27:04):
Then she came in like a wrecking ball. Yes, Sir
wmms Rob on social media, Allan Cox Show on your
social media, thank you. Happy chinooka to us, All Alan,
you've got crows in your backyard? What kind of birds
is Rob have in his I don't know that I've
ever heard Rob mention any kind of Yeah, the avan variety. Yeah, dude,

(01:27:30):
water foul crossing. There's like a sign over there, like
one seventeenth in Memphis or something, water fowl crossing. Dick
three point thirty. This morning. I heard him. I got
up for a pee standing there, hand on the wall
like I like, hand on the wall. Good for you, man.

Speaker 8 (01:27:51):
See, I like to do a hands on the hips pee.
Do you I do a superman whiz? Yeah, like I
don't have a care in the world.

Speaker 3 (01:27:58):
Yeah, I mean I'm not.

Speaker 8 (01:27:59):
I I prefer to make sure I keep one hand
on it, one head on time, just to make sure
I got it in the right area.

Speaker 3 (01:28:07):
I see I got I'm rock hard when IP in
the morning, so it's like I gotta kind of step back. Oh,
this is my mid night this is my middle of
the night peachy and my wake up pee.

Speaker 8 (01:28:15):
Yeah, hands on hips that you just need distance and
to complete the effect.

Speaker 3 (01:28:20):
I do like to wear a cape. My homage to
local heroes Siegul and Shuster Rock those bastards wow, taking
a whiz and they're out there.

Speaker 8 (01:28:37):
And then I'm cursing ducks at three thirty and I
go back to bed and it takes me longer to
fall back to sleep because now I'm annoyed by the ducks.

Speaker 3 (01:28:42):
At three thirty in the morning, you're just laying there steaming, steaming. Also,
do you are you at least at like, is your
bedroom like the opposite end of the house from the ducks.
Now they're like outside the bedroom window. Yeah, there's one
house in between my house and the duck house and
uh yeah, I mean I'm looking right at them. Yeah,

(01:29:02):
my bathroom window looks right down into their little palace.

Speaker 1 (01:29:06):
Wow.

Speaker 8 (01:29:07):
Oh yeah three thirty Yeah, having a pee yep, enjoying
it for the first seven eight seconds.

Speaker 3 (01:29:15):
Yeah, oh boy, hi go oh, that's that noise the
kids saying something, and you're not pe shy around the ducks,
knowing that the very possibly they might be hearing you. No, No, that's.

Speaker 8 (01:29:33):
Almost lower them a little bit. And that's what you
That's that's almost exactly what it sounded like.

Speaker 3 (01:29:40):
So at least you were able to keep the pea
volume louder than the darks. And you can still sort
of hear my rain machine coming from the uh, from
the from the bedroom.

Speaker 8 (01:29:48):
Is that what you call your winner? It is, oh,
good for you, the rain machine, my rain machine, my
rain stick.

Speaker 15 (01:29:54):
Oh what I like to do?

Speaker 10 (01:29:56):
Pepe poo pee pee poo poo pooh, I like to
do too, poo poo, peep, pe poo poo, poo, pee
pee poo, poo, pee pee pee pee poo poo poo, oh,
pee peep.

Speaker 13 (01:30:05):
What I like to do?

Speaker 4 (01:30:06):
Pee pee poo pee pee, poo, poo pooh. I like
to doo too, poo poo, peep pe poo.

Speaker 8 (01:30:12):
We can do a perfect recreation of it if you'd
like to, uh, go back to my ducks and peace sounds.

Speaker 3 (01:30:29):
The sound machine. Yeah you got that in Miami, didn't.

Speaker 13 (01:30:32):
This is it?

Speaker 3 (01:30:34):
Come my glorious Stefan gave it to me. That's it. Wow,
me ducks my sound machine. So you can hear the
sound machine all the way in the bathroom or is
your bathroom in the bedroom. It's just off of the bedroom.
It's like an n sweet bathroom.

Speaker 28 (01:30:53):
I have it.

Speaker 8 (01:30:54):
No, it's just right, it's just a right right now. Yeah,
I just have the rain turned on so damn loud
so I don't hear the ducks. That's what I've become, okay,
And nobody else in my house seems to care. My
wife will throw at ear butt in and sleep with
an ear butt in. My daughters are on the other
end of the house that they don't even hear it.

Speaker 3 (01:31:12):
Rob and I both play rain sounds because it sounds
so similar to applause. Yes, and that's what we need
to sleep. Your constant, constant sounds of applause and approbation.
We love from strangers, an acceptance all filled with half nods.
Thank you, thank you, thank you, please please Jesus please wait,

(01:31:37):
thank you. I am embarrassed. Thank you please my god? No, okay,
all right, it comes more a minutes. You're a hero.

Speaker 5 (01:31:46):
You You.

Speaker 3 (01:31:49):
Just show up every day. Look at you, hey, Jim,
how are you behind every great? Pa is a bunch
of ducks keeping me awake at night?

Speaker 8 (01:32:02):
Oh no, you guys, Oh you guys please please, Oh
you guys please?

Speaker 3 (01:32:07):
Hey Andrew, Hey, what's going on?

Speaker 21 (01:32:10):
Guys?

Speaker 13 (01:32:11):
You sir?

Speaker 3 (01:32:14):
I have a quick question for Rob.

Speaker 14 (01:32:17):
I heard that he called the ducks area their palace.

Speaker 1 (01:32:22):
Does he call it Duckingham Palace?

Speaker 3 (01:32:26):
Well, and well done, Thank you ducking Ham. That's what
I'm gonna call it.

Speaker 13 (01:32:34):
Now.

Speaker 3 (01:32:36):
You have to give him credit for that. No, you don't, Rob.
You don't have to give anybody credit for anything.

Speaker 8 (01:32:45):
When I come home tonight, I feel like I'm going
to look out the door like I always do, into
the backyard, sort of stand there for a minute like
dads do, and I'm gonna go. Oh, it appears Duckingham
Palace held up well during this snowstorm and then do
the face waiting for my children to respond, huh m,
no you dad did there.

Speaker 3 (01:33:03):
That's called the Ralph Furley don k Notts would play
the camera.

Speaker 7 (01:33:09):
The Carr Show on one hundred point seven, they say, no, man,
he's an island. But at I heard Cleveland, you sure
get your chance to try?

Speaker 3 (01:33:23):
Hello everybody, Allen Cock?

Speaker 1 (01:33:27):
Where did everybody go?

Speaker 7 (01:33:28):
On one hundred point seven WMMS.

Speaker 6 (01:33:47):
Boy?

Speaker 3 (01:33:47):
I tried with Stranger Things me too. I really tried,
and I was only like kind of interested in what
was going on. I feel very strongly they should have
wrapped this show up before now. But I'm like, well,
you know, they dropped it last week, and you go
on Netflix and that's all they're talking about, and there's
all this merch and all this kind of stuff whatever,

(01:34:08):
And I watched the first episode and I go, Nope,
I do not care anymore about these again. Kids in
air quotes. The show's been on for almost a decade,
I think, and the last season there's only a handful
of what. They dropped two episodes the day before Thanksgiving,
and I think the last two they're dropping on Christmas
Day or something. And the finale of the entire series

(01:34:31):
is going to be in theaters. But these these kids
are like forty now, they're like bishemy and thirty rocks.

Speaker 1 (01:34:38):
Howe kids?

Speaker 3 (01:34:40):
What Hi, fellow kids. I was infiltrating a high school
of so I really tried because I was like, okay, well,
let's see what they're doing. It's one of those shows
where you know, I know that there are stranger things
nerds out there, and they're like really into the show,
and that's fine, it's for you. But it's one of
those shows where I'm like, I cannot skip the recap

(01:35:02):
because there's such a gap in between seasons, and I
didn't skip the recap. Watch that and I'm like, okay,
kind of remember that. Maybe remember that. It's just feels
so silly.

Speaker 1 (01:35:13):
Now.

Speaker 3 (01:35:14):
Did you watch the first episode?

Speaker 17 (01:35:16):
No?

Speaker 3 (01:35:16):
I never made it past the second season. I watched
all that's.

Speaker 8 (01:35:18):
Why Oh you mailed early? Yeah, I've watched all of
them up till now. But I went likest like I
should like the show.

Speaker 3 (01:35:26):
I love One on a Riot. I think when it
first dropped, I was on board with everybody else that
first season. I was like, right, I love it as
a gen x er. I mean, it scratched me right
where I itch, and it was fine, but then it
kind of it felt it feels like it overstayed. It's welcome,
and again, these kids are all they look like they're

(01:35:47):
in their thirties. Millie Bobby Brown in real life has
a kid, right, that's got nothing to do obviously with
character in the show. But these kids are all like,
we're in high school and they still supposed to be
in high school. Yes, they're not in college.

Speaker 17 (01:36:01):
You know.

Speaker 3 (01:36:02):
They do a bit of a time jump to like
nineteen eighty seven, but it just feels really silly, like.

Speaker 8 (01:36:08):
The big bad in the show. The writing feels stale,
and the big bad in the show like who cares?

Speaker 3 (01:36:14):
How often can you do the same thing?

Speaker 8 (01:36:16):
That's why I think season two it was fine, but
I was like, it's the same thing they just did,
Like it's.

Speaker 3 (01:36:23):
All the same. The kids like, oh the Dema Gorgan.
I'm like what. So That's the weird thing to me
is how much I enjoyed the show at the beginning
and how much now I don't care.

Speaker 8 (01:36:36):
And so.

Speaker 3 (01:36:38):
I don't know how many episodes there are. They're all
about an hour and change. Anyway, I think the finale
is probably ninety minutes which is why they're putting it
in theaters. But don't care. I'm I'm out and I
like that David Harbor guy too, like I should like
this show. Well, there are a lot of people are like, oh,
this is really bad timing for all this bad press
with David Harbor, right like when Jared leto that stored

(01:37:00):
he dropped, They're like, oh, this guy's like running a
cult and he's grooming girls right on the heels of
Trump Ariy's dropping. But that story went away fast. And
the David Harbor thing, you know, he has a very
high profile wife, so that didn't help when they said
he was bullying the casters. Yeah, Millie Bobby Brown was like,
I had to have a chaperone with me every time
I did a scene with him because the guy was
so whatever. I mean, I don't whatever. What does she

(01:37:22):
say he did? Though, other than being a dick like
he should, I think that was it, right, Yeah, I
think that was it. But I mean, if you're someone
of her age, you're gonna be like, we don't have
to put up with this anymore. It's not nineteen ninety two,
and David Harbor has been around a long time. I
get the vibe from him that this guy was a
long time character actor, right. You'd see him in things
you can go. This guy's been in movies for thirty years.

(01:37:43):
You might not have known his name, but you knew
the face blows up from stranger things, and it feels
like maybe he got a full head over it. But
who knows. Obviously I don't know the ins and outs
of that. Now.

Speaker 8 (01:37:56):
I say Millie Bobby Brown, but she's very clear, Rob
That is no longer her name. She's Millie Bonnie bon Jovi.

Speaker 3 (01:38:06):
She's turning us on our heads. She married John bon
Jovi's kid. He's got a kid with him. Bobby was
never her name, she said. She was just kind of
taking the piss and having some fun and calling herself
Millie Bobby Brown. But her middle name is Bonnie, which
is my mother's name. Millie Bonnie bon Jovi is now

(01:38:28):
her legal name. And I'm curious what she's gonna do
after this, because she was the big breakout star of
this show, except the other things she's done don't exactly
like set people's hair on fire, and so I'm curious
what else will happen with her these other kids on

(01:38:50):
this show. I mean, listen, it's what happens with every
show based around kids, is they age and they start
to look gangly. But I mean, you know, ah, I
think Millie, this was a show about kind of obviously,
this was a show about little kids fighting the forces
of whatever, and now they're in high school and I'm like,
I just don't care. It just felt after that first

(01:39:10):
hour of that first episode of this last season, I
was like, boy, this feels silly. It feels silly.

Speaker 8 (01:39:15):
I think Millie Bobby Brown will be just fine. I
think the Millie Bonnie Bonjo Millie Bonnie bon Jovi, because
you know, you gotta say it like the italianos ban
Gio bon Jiove.

Speaker 3 (01:39:29):
I think that she will be just fine.

Speaker 8 (01:39:31):
I think once she sheds, once this is over, once
Stranger Things is in the rearview mirror, people won't say
that's they won't be thinking about her from Stranger Things
all of the time. Well, once they close the chapter,
it's over.

Speaker 3 (01:39:43):
Millie Bonnie bon Giovi is also and you have to
wonder if this is going to affect her personal life
at all. She is deaf in one ear. Huh, a
young woman, rob I said she's deaf in one ear.
Hold on on saked going to this year, Rob she's
deaf in one ear. She can't hear in one ear?

(01:40:04):
Which one the left? Let me let me try? Hold on?
What's that? She's deaf in that ear? That it's the
other one? Hold on, she's deaf in the other ear,
it's this one. Yeah, you can you hear me in
that one?

Speaker 8 (01:40:17):
I ken?

Speaker 3 (01:40:17):
Ye, jess, can you hear me?

Speaker 5 (01:40:19):
Uh uh?

Speaker 3 (01:40:20):
Well, she's deaf in both ears. Yeah, that's the bigger problem.
If something back there doing as.

Speaker 5 (01:40:25):
L sont even read either, so it's screwed.

Speaker 3 (01:40:30):
Read well. Fortunately, not a lot of reading required around here,
so you'll be just fine.

Speaker 8 (01:40:37):
Yeah, I think, honestly, I think she'll be once the
movie's done. Once all that crap, she can settle in
as something else, like.

Speaker 3 (01:40:43):
He's done other movies that nobody cared about, Nola Hughes
and Damsel and this terrible thing with Chris Pratt called
The Electric State.

Speaker 8 (01:40:52):
So but I think that's all been in the shadow
of stranger things. I think once that's gone, I guess
it'll be it'll be a different thing for her. The
Brown movies were good. I watched those with my kids.

Speaker 3 (01:41:03):
She was like Sherlock Holmes sister or something. Yeah, I mean, yeah,
it was a dumb other kid. All the other kids
have done other things. The one kid was in the
Ghostbusters reboot and you know that's with the long hair, right,
Yeah he did, but now he's got this weird haircut. Yeah. Anyway,
Finn fin wolf Art Yeah yeah, great name. By the way,
the kid looks like a vulture, but I mean, great name.

(01:41:25):
Who's the kid with the speech impediment? The major things
is what we called the show when this kid was
Gayton matartto. It was cute when he was little, and
then it just got okay, all right, we get it.
It's fine. It's just it's not their fault. They're all
grown up, and the show feels really dumb because they
have like the wigs of their old hair or something.

(01:41:45):
And I'm like, okay, at least Joe Keery is like
a musician and he does other stuff and so yeah.

Speaker 8 (01:41:53):
Yeah, the kid who plays Will looks like he's one
hundred and seven now, which I think is the best part.
Like I saw the pictures of like the cast of
the season. My Jesus kid looks thirty.

Speaker 13 (01:42:02):
Well.

Speaker 3 (01:42:02):
In that first episode they do like a flashback, but
they clearly have to like like cgi the kid actor's
face on or something. I don't know. Yeah, they're all
like early twenties, right. I just got to the end
of the first episode and I was like, Okay, I'm
gonna give this an hour and see where they're going.

Speaker 8 (01:42:16):
And at the end, I go, nope, I do not care.
Yeah that Natalia Dier, the one who plays Nancy, is
thirty years old.

Speaker 3 (01:42:24):
Yes, And by the way, and she's in real life
with the dude from the show that's her boyfriend, which
do oh really?

Speaker 1 (01:42:32):
Yeah, the.

Speaker 3 (01:42:34):
The brother of Jona Ryder is no. The other one,
Charlie heat Yeah, yeah, yeah, and so yeah, so they're
all doing other things and that's fine. I wish them
nothing but the best. And I know there are a
lot of people who are ride or die with stranger things.
But I'm out. Now that it's ending, I kind of

(01:42:55):
want to go back and give it another shot, Like
did I let go of it too soon? Two seasons.
I never saw the guy that plays the Metallica stuff.
I never saw any of that. Oh, Joseph Quinn, you
never saw any of that. Yeah, he was the human
torch in that reboot of The Fantastic Four. But a
lot of people didn't know he was in that Quiet
Place prequel to I think because they knew he they

(01:43:17):
remember him with the heavy metal wig, and so when
they saw the actual actor, they were like, I don't
know who that guy is. And then they were like, oh,
it's the guy from Straight Oh yeah, yeah, all a
surprised you like stranger things, although the ugly kids listen.
I've said it. I'm on record, you better have hot
kids in your show, right, not a pervy way if
it's gonna work. If it's a show about kids, and
this is what you're serving me, They're just like any

(01:43:39):
other actor. I need them to be visually pleasant, and
I think there's a lot of people and stranger things
that are visually unpleasant. I started watching that entire show
because a little known a rider. I'm a gen xer man.
I mean, she was our she was our exhibit A.
Oh yeah, back in the day, was Winona Ryder beatle Juice,

(01:44:02):
all of it? Yeah, reality be taste if you know
you were Latin. Ah, but yeah, I'm not sticking around
for Wenona Ryder. Inst What was the uh oh god,
what was that movie? She was in with Christian Slater Heathers.
Heathers remember that one. Sure, I love my dad gay
Son love Heathers. I went back a while ago because

(01:44:25):
I was clicking around and it happened to be on
the Gary Oldman Dracula. Remember Bram Stoker's Dracula. It was
Francis fort Coppolo's Wenona Ryers. Keanure is doing a terrible accent.
Gary Oldman was Count Dracula, And I'm like, wow, does
this movie not hold up? Because at the time ninety
two I saw it in college, I was like, this

(01:44:45):
is great. She is not good.

Speaker 8 (01:44:49):
She was also the girlfriend in mister Deed's She was
Sandler movie. Yeah, just scrolling through, I forgot about that women.
It was Joe and Little Women. I don't think seen
that well. I thought it was about midgets.

Speaker 3 (01:45:04):
But much to my chagrin, much to my dismay, it
was not now Edward Scissor Hands. Yeah, she turned down
the role in the film Edward Penis Hands, which is
the one that I liked a lot. But yeah, so
we Wobbly Fingers.

Speaker 8 (01:45:21):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:45:23):
So I was on the fence about Stranger Things. But
I was like, okay, I I might be surprised. Maybe
I'm going into this, you know, all curmudgeony, Maybe I am,
but I'm like, I ain't wasting time on a show
that I don't care about anymore. Yeah, because, like somebody said,
the finale is in theaters because it's supposed to be
two and a half hours long. You guys don't know

(01:45:44):
how to tell a story if you have five seasons
of a show and you're still doing the same thing.

Speaker 5 (01:45:51):
So they just go on adventures with each other.

Speaker 24 (01:45:53):
What is it?

Speaker 3 (01:45:54):
Well, now they're now the military has taken over the
upside down, so they're trying to infiltrate this other dimension.
So you have, narratively, you've traveled from this other dimension
that only these kids knew existed to now like everybody
knows about it. The town is essentially under military control

(01:46:15):
and blah blah blah. But like Matthew Modine still in it.
He's in it, like Ethan Hawk's kid is in it. Yeah,
they're all fine actors. I just don't want to watch
these kids. And you know, I'm with you riding around
on their dirt bikes. I'm like, god, no, thank you. So, yeah,

(01:46:38):
the four main kids are in high school and everybody
else is kind of running around. You know, at this
point they're like all commandos and they're setting up these missions.
Is the one kid all messed up? Still will okay?
He has like seizures and he's like seeing the eyes
of the Demi organ and you know, see, I don't

(01:46:58):
even think I ever made it to the Demi gorgon stuff.
Our friend Leslie texted me in all caps, all caps rop,
which she's not prone to doing all capsyss Ellen, baby,
I love you. You are wrong. Gary Oldman holds up
as Dracula and I will die on this hill. Well, Leslie,

(01:47:22):
you will die alone on that hill. No, listen, I
could be in the minority there. I just hadn't seen
that movie in a long time. Everybody knows about Keanu's terrible,
terrible accent, but beyond that, I was like, yeah, but
the movie's great, isn't it. And then I watched I
was like, oh, new, Listen, Gary Oldman's great in everything

(01:47:42):
that to me is a separate thing. Millie Bobby Brown
was also in one of the King Kong movies. Right, Elanie,
She's just gets better. Listen. I applaud those of you
who are still watching the show because it's for you.
It's clearly not for me. It's like this program when

(01:48:02):
people call me and go, you suck, I don't listen.
I go, hey, yeah you do, b please don't because
I'm looking to clear out the dead wood. So you're
doing me a favor if you split. So that's what
they're that's what they're doing with me. They don't care
if I watch.

Speaker 8 (01:48:16):
Millie Bonnie bon Jiovi and her husband Jake bon Giov
adopted their child Oh in the summer of twenty twenty five.

Speaker 3 (01:48:27):
She didn't want to ruin her bard to art. She's
keeping it. I'm telling you, man, she's twenty one. Yeah,
she's ready for life after stranger things. She's gonna do
just fine. That's what I thought is. I was like, wow,
that's young to have a kid. It's not nineteen sixty nine,
you know what I mean. Like, but if they adopt it,
I mean physically have a kid when you're an actress. Okay,

(01:48:49):
well that makes sense. Adopted a kid, adopt, don't shop
rob she's keeping it toy like a toy. So yeah,
Millie Bonnie bon Jovi. For the people who are keeping
track of those things, well, congratulations to them. What does
bon Jovi's kid do? Is he a musician in his

(01:49:11):
own right? Don Jovi's kid, Yeah, he doesn't have to
do anything nothing.

Speaker 8 (01:49:15):
Yeah, but bon Jovi doesn't strike me as a guy
who's like giving his money to his kids. John bon
Jovi seems like a really by all accounts, he's a
pretty centered dude.

Speaker 3 (01:49:25):
He looks so wholesome. American model and actor is what
it says, all right, Well, I mean the word model
doesn't mean anything anymore, so I'm always curious what you
know he was in. He looks like any other random
scrub you'd run into. You know, he was in bar
In Brunswick.

Speaker 8 (01:49:40):
Movie, a musical film called rock Bottom, and a romantic
comedy called Sweethearts.

Speaker 3 (01:49:46):
I'll be the judge of whether or not it's a comedy.
You should just call it a romantic his I'll tell
you if it's funny.

Speaker 8 (01:49:53):
His IMDb page also lists other upcoming projects like in
ol Homes three uhh that ought to be good.

Speaker 3 (01:50:03):
First two weren't enough. I didn't know there was a
Nanola Holmes too.

Speaker 8 (01:50:07):
Once you start hitching your wagon to your wife for
your acting career, it's going to end miserably. This is
gonna be he's gonna just get jealous that he doesn't
have a career and she's he's a nepo husband, right,
he's a neo baby and husband.

Speaker 3 (01:50:19):
Yeah, wow, this guy's smart. Just hanging on man, just
rolling in dull. Well. Everyone's blown me up about Dracula, right,
saying that it holds up.

Speaker 8 (01:50:30):
Okay, I got a text that says they're making an
offshoot show with the skinny girl stranger.

Speaker 3 (01:50:38):
I don't care for her at all. I don't know
who she is, but that's how you dire. Oh, that's
who it is. I find her very visually unpleasant.

Speaker 8 (01:50:46):
Okay, so really, yes, Oh, I don't think he's a
super super bony and angular.

Speaker 3 (01:50:52):
I do not care to look at her for an
extended period of time. I don't.

Speaker 8 (01:50:59):
I think that's I think that's Sadie Sink, the one
who they have confined to a hospital.

Speaker 3 (01:51:05):
Beg, she's still in a coma. She's the one that
was playing Kate Bush. You know, Kate Bush got millions
of dollars in streaming revenue because The Stranger Things last
Searson that Sadie Sink, that redhead, very low key actress,
she's been in some other things. She's dynamite, but they
got her laying in the bed because she's in a coma.
Who's the one you're talking about. I'm sure she's good
Italian Diary. Yeah, plays Will's sister. I think. I mean,

(01:51:26):
she's cute, don't care for it ish And that's being
as shallow as I can possibly be, not a shallow person.
I'm draining a lot of water out to get there.
Maya Hawk is also in the show. Yeah, she's great too.
She's going by Millie Bonbond. Somebody says she said in
an interview, I feel like she's trolling all of us

(01:51:48):
because of her mind. She's like, why would anyone care
what I call myself? And she's absolutely correct. The Ellen
Carr Show.

Speaker 1 (01:51:56):
On one hundred called the Alan Cock Show.

Speaker 3 (01:52:02):
And this is when the Antichrist is going to reveal himself.
He lives among the beasts and heat grass.

Speaker 17 (01:52:09):
Two six seven eight one double oh seven or eight
one double oh seven.

Speaker 3 (01:52:27):
Three two. I'll send me a text. You'll get the
chat room open if you're watching the show on our
YouTube channel. Boy, I love fun facts man, all fun
Uh the trapping weather facts there? Yeah, no, I'll hear
that one. I think that I did. Yeah, it's it's
kind of a big deal. I didn't know that. Well
it was it was legal? Uh information, Yes, yeah, something

(01:52:54):
to satisfy. I love that one. Did they said about no,
it's illegal.

Speaker 24 (01:53:01):
Yeah, hold on, it's illegal to not center Elkimelt has
one over one billion for their injured clients. Call one
eight hundred elk Ohio. It's very messy on the roadways
with the melting snow. Also watch out for those icy patches.
Fun fact, did you know that it is an Ohio
law to remove snow and ice from your car? Also,
the law requires your headlights beyond any time of vehicles

(01:53:24):
whinshield wipers are activated, Jackie robertson the time.

Speaker 3 (01:53:27):
Now, I didn't know exactly. Well again, fun is objective,
but and I'm Captain fun Rob, That's what I'm saying.
I take it as more objective, all right, But I
didn't know that your lights had to be on when
your wipers were on. Well, I think most cars now
just happens. Is that true though?

Speaker 6 (01:53:46):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (01:53:46):
Mine mine is. Yeah, when your wipers are on, your lights,
I mean you would.

Speaker 8 (01:53:49):
Do one of them though, running running lights running lights, right,
I think it just happens. I mean, now, fun fact
for me.

Speaker 3 (01:53:59):
I'm a guy who rides rain or shine with my
wipers on, so it's very distracting for people who are
riding with me because there's the noise. Yeah yeah, how
about your New England Patriots? Now, Young Way Coup stole

(01:54:20):
their stole their thunder. This is the kicker for the
New York Giants who dug his foot into the turf.
He didn't even get the ball. Troy Aikman one of
the guys calling the get Aikman.

Speaker 8 (01:54:35):
Uh.

Speaker 3 (01:54:36):
He couldn't even stop laughing at it. I'll show you
the video if you're watching the live stream of what
how far out was he? Oh, there's a forty seven
yard attempt. Young Way Coup, who was a guy we
almost had on the Chicago Bears. By the way, you
might remember a guy named Cody Parky. Remember the double
doink guy.

Speaker 8 (01:54:55):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (01:54:56):
Okay, Cody Parky had a couple of tours of duty
with the Browns, I think, but the Bears had him
and he crapped the bed and then they had Young
Way Ku come in for a hot minute to practice
with him. We almost had this guy and the Bears.
He's kicking for the Giants though, and he never even
touched the ball.

Speaker 6 (01:55:16):
Forty seven yard try now by Young Way Coude. He
stumbled Killen gets swallowed up here.

Speaker 17 (01:55:24):
It is.

Speaker 6 (01:55:30):
Whoops. I guess that goes down as a fist.

Speaker 3 (01:55:36):
I don't know if they touched the ball that would
have hurt. I would have thanked you.

Speaker 8 (01:55:41):
Yeah, you're going in full kicked it like to just stop.
I've never seen that in all of my life. I've
never seen that.

Speaker 11 (01:55:47):
It was about.

Speaker 3 (01:55:48):
I mean that dude, the placeholder, Jamie Gillen. Yeah, this
guy had a ninety four yard kick returned for a touchdown.
So it was a rough night for the Giants of
New York City. Thirty three to fifteen was the final
there against the New England Patriots. Yeah they're yeah, dude,

(01:56:08):
they're good man, Yeah, dude, Patriots a killer. But everybody's asked.
It was still seventeen to seven when that happened. But
Young Way Ku yeah, he says it was because of
the weather.

Speaker 8 (01:56:21):
I've never seen that. I mean, people play in all
kinds of weather. I've never seen that happens.

Speaker 3 (01:56:27):
He's no joke of a kicker. He's been around a
long time. He's a good kicker, but that yeah, not
his uh, not his best moment. Yeah, I'd be so
pissed if Troygan was laughing at me too. They do
your job, jerk, laugh at me missing a kick, jerk.

Speaker 6 (01:56:44):
Forty seven years try now by young Way Cody Stumble.

Speaker 20 (01:56:49):
I don't think I've ever seen that.

Speaker 3 (01:56:51):
Look like you just stumped his foot right end of
the term.

Speaker 10 (01:56:56):
Whoop.

Speaker 3 (01:57:00):
I guess that goes down as a miss.

Speaker 6 (01:57:02):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (01:57:03):
I've never touched it all.

Speaker 6 (01:57:05):
I said a miss, But it's not a miss because
he never touched the football.

Speaker 3 (01:57:09):
Fill perfect, it's real, Yeah, Troy Aikman, Well, because they
cut to Jackson Dart. Yeah, there's the quarterback for the Giants,
and he's going, are you kidding me? Yeah?

Speaker 8 (01:57:24):
I think he said, oh my god or something. There
you go, oh, like you like, of all the bad
things to happen, that happened, you know, He's like, come on, yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:57:32):
Well there you go. Listen. It happens to the best
of them, that's it. But at young Way coup Listen.
They can't all be Phil Dawson or Robbie Gould. Okay,
they can't all be guys. Yes, it can't all be
guys who get in there and just murder every time. Yeah,
it's a drag that that sucks. And I don't know
how he didn't hurt himself. Alan Gary Oldman's Dracula is

(01:57:57):
the worst of the Draculas. Listen for me. I know
about that. Leslie Nielsen is the best. Hashtag always my
Dracula Basketball Dan though saying that the best Dracula, of
course is Count Chalcula. Now I've never had Count Chocula.
I was a booberry man, but I will say that

(01:58:18):
if Count Chocula is our best Dracula, you're turning my
mind into a pretzel. Because he's got a lot of company.
A lot of actors have portrayed Dracula. There was Gerard Butler.
Remember he was Dracula two thousand, right. He was the
whatever you think of Gerard Butler, and he's done a
lot of crap in the interim, but a lot of

(01:58:40):
hits too. He was Dracula and the Phantom of the Opera,
which is short for if you've ever seen the live
production Phantom of the Operation. He was a doctor. The
mask is because he hurt himself and then of course
you had Frank Lenjella. If you're a you remember that

(01:59:01):
actor played Dracula in the seventies. Remember the Frank langella Dracula.
I don't nineteen seventy nine. I think it was a
big hit. The euro was born. Shut up, Rob. Sorry.
It's not often I get to say I feel young
about something.

Speaker 8 (01:59:17):
I know.

Speaker 3 (01:59:18):
And there's another Dracula movie coming out, I think in
January or in a couple of weeks or something. This kid,
Caleb Landry Jones, who's very odd looking, very androgynous, he's
in there's a movie coming out called Dracula a Love Tail.
Oh boy, and it's it's getting attention because of the director.

(01:59:39):
Oh Luke Bassan, who's the French guy that did like
Fifth Elament and Leaf Nikita. Dracula a Love Tail is
going to be out. It also sounds like it's largely unnecessary.

Speaker 8 (01:59:51):
It's another one with Christoph walso in it. And you
said he's in Frankenstein Frankenstein. Yeah, so yeah, a lot
of guys that put on the Cape is Dracula. Right,
you go all the way back to Christopher Lee. There
is an actor named Luke Evans who played Dracula. Remember
Bella Lagosi.

Speaker 3 (02:00:12):
How about Adam Sandler, Oh, from his cartoon movie Animated,
But he's Dracula in Hotel Transylvania. I don't say blah
blah blah. I mean he's basically he's doing Smigel doing Triumph. Yes,
Nicholas Cage, you see Renfield, I have not. Nicholas Cage

(02:00:33):
played Dracula.

Speaker 24 (02:00:36):
For me.

Speaker 3 (02:00:38):
The best Dracula is Leslie Nielsen. Now I'm leaving out again.
I'm leaving out the black guys, right, the guy that
played Blackula. Do you remember that actor's name?

Speaker 17 (02:00:49):
No?

Speaker 3 (02:00:49):
No, nobody does you know why? Rob racism?

Speaker 18 (02:00:55):
Uh?

Speaker 3 (02:00:55):
I don't remember the guy's name either. Blacula was William Marshall.
William Marshall. I was just about to say it, Yes,
I know you were. And that was an African prince
who goes to Transylvania and gets turned into a vampire,
so he's technically he's not Dracula. Was Eddie Murphy I

(02:01:17):
gets turned into a vampire and becomes a black Ula.
Was Eddie Murphy Dracula or just a vampire in that movie?
Which one?

Speaker 15 (02:01:28):
Was that?

Speaker 3 (02:01:28):
A vampire in Harlem Brooklyn? Yeah, he was wasn't he
wasn't Snoop Dog a vampire. Now we're getting away here.
You're talking. You're making the distinction between Dracula. No, I'm
saying a vampire a vampire or was he Dracula in
that movie? I think he was a vampire. Okay, I
couldn't remember. I've been thirty years since I've seen that movie. Now,
the first vampire I remember as a young boy. There's

(02:01:53):
a show that was on NBC for literally probably five minutes,
and it was called Cliffhangers. If you are a gen
xer and you remember this show, boy, you are breathing
rarefied air, because this show was barely on at all,
and it was an anthology. They had four different stories

(02:02:14):
going on, and one of them was a Dracula story,
and it was called Cliffhangers. It was literally on NBC
for three months, and they were trying to like bring
back like old movie serial anthologies, and so they had
like an Indiana Jones rip off, even though it was

(02:02:36):
before Indiana Jones, but even Indiana Jones was like a
ripoff of nineteen forties movies. And they had one of
them was called the Cursive Dracula, and that was the
one I remember when I was a kid, I was
like eight. Now I want to watch Blackula. You should.
I bet it's on TWOB I'm sure it is. Alan.
What about Sesame Street? Count Dracula? You got me? Well, yeah,

(02:03:01):
he's the Count drac though, is it count Dracula? Chris
rand in Fright Night? He wasn't Dracula. He's a vampire?
What vampire? Anything? Where you're going? Six a ah seven
six seven six seven yeah? Hold on, let me get

(02:03:26):
you some count here, because I think we're running Elmo
ads and so this will be a nice tonic to
get your mind off that. Sometimes I sit and count
all day. This is old school.

Speaker 27 (02:03:42):
Oh yeah, sometimes I get carried away. I count slowly, slowly, slowly,
getting faster once I starting counting on the stuff fast.

Speaker 3 (02:04:00):
But it is so exciting. Now, Rob, here's what I
will say, as far as continuity goes. You know, they
would always show the count on Sesame Street wearing a monocle,
and as everybody knows, vampires have perfect vision, So why
would they do it?

Speaker 10 (02:04:19):
Right?

Speaker 3 (02:04:20):
Was it just a fashion choice? Well, there's one of
two things going on here. Either it was an affectation,
you know, like kids in college. Present company included who
would wear cosmetic glasses because they thought it made him
look smarter. I did that for a couple of months.
Fun fact, it did not make me look smarter. So
maybe it was an affectation or a choice, like you said.

(02:04:42):
Or he's not a real vampire. Oh, I'd blow your mind.
Imagine the count from Sesame Street we find out not
a real vampire.

Speaker 8 (02:04:53):
I'm gonna go with it. He's he was a sock
with a guy's hand.

Speaker 3 (02:04:58):
Up his ass. I mean by the song he sounds Italian.

Speaker 8 (02:05:05):
Hey, I was gonna go more on the Jewish side
of things. I love to count like he's Tevier. He's
up there on the roof.

Speaker 3 (02:05:13):
Yep. I love to company. If I were a rich vampire,
I would yeah. Okay, Well there's a lot to go
around there.

Speaker 8 (02:05:23):
One, two, three, four, and five, six or seven beautiful numbers.

Speaker 3 (02:05:32):
Yeah, thank you, George Hamilton, love it for a spike.
That's a great one too, Alan, What about Dark Shadows?
That was before my time? But Dark Shadows I've still
never seen. They tried to make a movie version with
Johnny Depp and people were like, I don't even remember
the show, but it was my mom's favorite television show.
It was like a parody of a soap opera with
Dracula and this kind of gothic Victorian cast or whatever.

(02:05:55):
When I was a kid, my mom loved Dark Shadows.

Speaker 8 (02:06:00):
The male lead an actor named Jonathan Frid So could
that have been why was she maybe digging the Oh?

Speaker 3 (02:06:08):
No, he looked like an accountant. Okay, I mean he's
I think that was the guy's name. I just didn't know.

Speaker 8 (02:06:12):
Maybe it was like, you know, like when when moms
read romance novels. No, you know, like mommy porn type
of stuff.

Speaker 3 (02:06:17):
No, No, it was based on Yeah, the Dark Shadows.
It was a soap opera from like the late sixties
or something. I don't know anything about this show. Jonathan
fred was the actor's name. Did you call me? He

(02:06:38):
was a Canadian actor, Barnabas Collins. He was a vampire,
so he wasn't the rock Wool, but he was is
a vampire. And again I've said it before, I would
love to be a vampire. However, you gotta find that
sweet spot. You don't want to be a kid vampire.
You don't want to be Kierson Dunston interviewed with a vampire.

(02:07:00):
You don't want to be an old, although it would
be preferable, preferable to be older. I'm fifty four, right,
I'll be fifty five next summer. Hold for applause. I would.

Speaker 8 (02:07:14):
Waiting, pausing, I would still take the bite right right now.
I'm at my I'm at my prime. Baby, yeah me talking. Well,
that's not true. But nothing hurts, nothing cracks. I am
in for my age as peque as I can be.

Speaker 3 (02:07:33):
Now, sure, very sad, but all things being equal, somebody goes, hey,
no shrimp, I'm a vampire. I'm biden. Whoever wants right,
it's our whole thing. You know, it's like the Jehovah's witnesses.
They're just looking for warm bodies.

Speaker 5 (02:07:48):
You know.

Speaker 3 (02:07:48):
You run into the Ja Dubs on the sidewalk out
here at ninth in Euclid, and I'll talk your ear off.
You're out there a lot oh hells. Yeah there. As
when we were in Chicago, we stayed on Navy Pier,
and the jay Us had a table set up in
Navy Peer, like the body of Navy Peer, the inside
where it's all shops and retail and stuff, and right
around the corner there because we had to walk through

(02:08:09):
the body of the thing to get to the hotel
was in Navy Peer and yeah, jdubs are set up
there with a table. Have you heard the good word?
I've not.

Speaker 8 (02:08:18):
What is it, Albuquerque? I just yeah, I just nod in. Hey,
good to see you, Good luck singing that song.

Speaker 3 (02:08:29):
But yeah, So the distinction to be made between vampires
and Dracula, Right, he's the og. There's a lot more
vampires than Dracula. Alan, the Count maybe a sock of
the man's hand of his ass, but he's real to me.
I didn't say a man's hand, he's just an a hand. Yes,

(02:08:50):
you left a sex netral tender neutral. Yeah, Alan, I
think Barnabas is a name that needs to make a comeback.
Hm hmm, all right, fine, physician, healed myself. Go leave
it in uh and whatever comes out, you name it Barnabas.
This is my daughter Barnabas. There's a YouTube video of

(02:09:16):
the Count singing his song, but the word count is
bleeped to make it sound highly inappropriate. I like that
too very much. See if I can find it the
Count censored, you'll know.

Speaker 27 (02:09:38):
That I am called the Count.

Speaker 3 (02:09:44):
Because I really love.

Speaker 27 (02:09:51):
Sometimes I see it and hold it, but sometimes I
get cady away.

Speaker 3 (02:10:06):
Slowly, kicking faster, faster, faster. See. I think they put
a little bit of an f in there, didn't they.
I mean, they're bleeping count but it feels like whoever
did that stuck like the very part of it's great?

(02:10:32):
Thank you for that tip of the cap there, boy,
I gotta tell you, rob a lot of people, and
by a lot, I mean Golly two or three.

Speaker 8 (02:10:43):
Took umbrage for whatever reason. At you going gaga over
Adam Levine. I got take his daughters to the Maroon
five show last week, and his recap the next day
was largely focused on what a specimen Adam Levine is.

Speaker 3 (02:10:58):
Now, I think that's universal. You don't have to like
their music. But nobody looks at Adam Levine and goes,
eh right, he he he hee. Alright, Well, yeah, Jess
puts some Maybie in the NOL column. You want to
know who is hot? Well, I was gonna, I was
just gonna ask you if you are you you like him?

Speaker 5 (02:11:20):
They look all greasy or what do you like Stephen Tyler?

Speaker 3 (02:11:24):
The guy's ninety. He looks like a grandmother walking the beach. No,
you like who he used to be. No, no, someone's aunt.
I wanted to be one of you, wanted to be
one of those fourteen year olds he was talking about
in his book.

Speaker 5 (02:11:37):
Yeah, I read that book ninety times just picturing it.

Speaker 3 (02:11:40):
Was me nine ninew No, she likes Steven Tyler.

Speaker 5 (02:11:47):
No, I like him specifically, not in like twenty ten,
but like I don't know, like now, he looks so good.

Speaker 3 (02:11:54):
He looks like an aunt, like someone's aunt. There are
pictures of him from a few years ago, so not
even current, a few years ago where he was like
on vacation on the beach obviously the worst time for
paparazzi to get anybody, right because they're not aware that
you're there and they're not at there. But he had
his hair piled up on his head and he looked
like he was wearing a moomoo, and I was like,
who is that? Esmeralda from Bewitched is off. You could

(02:12:17):
see his mits and I don't know about his toe,
but no, his toe's really weird. How do you know
that he has it? You go that granular on Stephen
Tyler everything about him.

Speaker 17 (02:12:27):
Wow.

Speaker 3 (02:12:28):
So if Stephen Tyler, because you're operating in a different arena. Now, Jess,
Stephen Tyler is doing something with WMMS. I'd sweating and
there's an opportunity we would put you right in front
of him and you would be speechless. What okay, be

(02:12:49):
very excited. Oh yeah, hmmmm, well now we know this route.
Another piece of the Jess puzzle comes into play here.
Such a good looking guy, he's not. Just look at it.
Even young Steven Tyler wasn't. That's what I was thinking.
Even young. So you're saying that he aged like fine wine.

Speaker 5 (02:13:09):
Oh yeah, he probably smells really bad.

Speaker 3 (02:13:12):
But uh, mothballs and mothballs. Yeah, I'm trying to find
that picture of him with his hair all piled up.

Speaker 8 (02:13:19):
Yeah, just google, uh Steven Tyler. Ant popa Steven Tyler
and a skimpy speedo. There Rob, and he's now again.
He is an almost an eighty year old man, and
he could be in a lot worse shape.

Speaker 3 (02:13:34):
Oh, he's in great shape for an old guy. For suit.

Speaker 5 (02:13:36):
You see him live like, he runs aroundrous times.

Speaker 8 (02:13:39):
It's great, stevens. I just think Steven Tyler's Oh yeah,
very not a good looking guy. Here's the picture.

Speaker 3 (02:13:48):
Steven Tyler looks like my friend's mom, who didn't care
if we drank as long as we didn't drive. Is
that the one with his hair up? In his hairs
up and he's are hanging out. Not even that he's
got necklaces on, because he always had scarves, he's got
oversized sunglasses on. His features are already very feminine. He
was always a very like pretty man kind of you know.

(02:14:11):
And even though they were, I don't think they were
ever glammed up beyond maybe a little bit of guyliner.
But all right, well now we know there's nothing wrong
with that. I mean, that's who just likes is Steven Tyler.
Now who is a close second, now that we're all
digesting your love of Steven Tyler? Peter Frampton. No, not
that guy you. I bet you don't even know who

(02:14:33):
Peter Frampton is. He is from. I don't know off
the top of my head. He is Peter Frampton, I
know who he is.

Speaker 8 (02:14:42):
Oh my goodness, hind with this man crushing over Adam Levine.

Speaker 2 (02:14:50):
I have a white hot hatred for Marine five and
I just can't.

Speaker 3 (02:14:57):
See what's the fade. I don't know what these faith anyway,
You got the gist, Rob.

Speaker 8 (02:15:04):
Yeah, I got a whole bunch of that stuff. People
give me a hard time, and look, I get it. Okay, fine,
I'm a known heterosexual man who has no problem in
the world saying Adam Levine is a specimen.

Speaker 3 (02:15:16):
Whatever that makes me, call me what you want, I
don't care. Rob has an unblemished record of staunch heterosexuality. Yes, right,
and that is why, as two men who are supremely
confident in their sexuality, we can look at a guy, go,
that's a good looking dude. I have my share of
man crushes right when I've had them on the show
over the years. I've told them, David Duchovney, why don't

(02:15:38):
we talk more often we're in each other's phones, and
he said, he said, I will. He chuckled, and he said,
I will try to be more diligent. I said, thank you.

Speaker 5 (02:15:48):
Okay, I have my close second, Jerry Seinfeld.

Speaker 3 (02:15:54):
Over the place.

Speaker 1 (02:15:55):
I love this.

Speaker 3 (02:15:57):
What is Steven Tyler? Jerry Seinfeld. Then the next time
Ryan Hamilton is here, we're going to introduce him to
Jess because he looks like even he knows it, he
looks like Jerry Seinfeld. Jerry takes him out a very
funny comedian. But and he looks like Jerry Seinfeld.

Speaker 5 (02:16:14):
There was this one time when I was in Chicago
in a Trader Joe's, and I swear to god, I
thought this guy was Jerry Seinfeld. Been staring at him. No,
because then finally he looks at me and he goes,
are you looking at me? And I was like, I'm sorry.
He looked just like Jerry Seinfeld. He's like, well, I
haven't cut my hair. I'm like, no, that's not it.

Speaker 3 (02:16:32):
Yeah, nobody would. Why doesn't he go to the hair.
Nobody knows what Jerry Seinfeld's hair is. Are you looking
at me? Alan? You didn't just say that somebody looks
like somebody's grandmother, you son of a motherless whoreor you know?
I knew someone was as soon as you say it.
I know what you're doing, you dirty, dirty bastard. Who

(02:16:57):
are they grandma? A bunch of ass sols? Thank you?

Speaker 1 (02:17:00):
Ellen Cox Show on.

Speaker 9 (02:17:02):
One hundred seven, Welcome back Local DJ and all around
female orgasm Denier Allen Cox.

Speaker 7 (02:17:14):
This is the Allan Cox Show on one hundred point
seven w M M S.

Speaker 19 (02:17:23):
Patise release Rosado, please.

Speaker 3 (02:17:35):
Please please magic plainness d J Cummerbunds should be him.

Speaker 19 (02:17:44):
I'm please your Christmas, Please your Christmas.

Speaker 21 (02:17:50):
I please.

Speaker 8 (02:17:58):
I'm pretty sure that police not be from Jose Feliciano
is my favorite Christmas song.

Speaker 3 (02:18:05):
Really.

Speaker 1 (02:18:06):
Yeah.

Speaker 8 (02:18:07):
When I think about Christmas songs, I don't really think
of any traditional ones that I really really enjoy.

Speaker 3 (02:18:12):
I like do They Know It's Christmas? Which was a
charity song from a British group called band Aid. Remember that.
I like that one a lot. Thank god it's them
instead of you. Yeah, Bono, And I like Feliz Navidad
from Jose Feliciano. He took a lot of heat. Boy,
this guy. If you're not familiar with him, he was blind,

(02:18:35):
he was a guitar player. He's very, very popular in
the seventies. He's been gone for a minute, right, Jose Feliciano.
Yeah yeah, but like back in the day he was making.
You know, there wasn't a lot of you know, Puerto
Rican representation in the mainstream. He is alive. He's eighty.

(02:18:56):
I thought he died some time ago, but he's alive anyway.
But you know, he did a version of Light My
Fire by the Doors Fire. It was like this Flamenco version, right,
Faliz Navida was his song. But he used to do
like all those variety shows back in the day, and
this guy he did like the Star Spangled banner or something,

(02:19:19):
and he took so much crap from people because I'm like,
this is a blind Puerto Rican guy who's unbelievably talented.
But he I saw him on some show forever ago
talking about like he gil his hate mail from people like, Oh,
I don't think I knew he was blind. And I
think he's really rich. I think he's really rich, like

(02:19:44):
a billionaire Jose Feliciano. Good for him, right, And I
think he like he's from Puerto Rico, but I think
he might have come up in Detroit. But again, you know,
he was a household name in a lot of other
parts of the world and he was famous as a

(02:20:07):
young man. But yeah, and somebody did a parody called
Felise Navidad the Illegal Alien Christmas Song or something, and
it was a whole big thing. Yeah, it was wild. Hey, Leslie, Hi, Hi,

(02:20:31):
So I.

Speaker 16 (02:20:31):
Want to bridge two conversations from last segment. Okay, follow
me on this.

Speaker 3 (02:20:35):
You're not calling. You're not calling to castigate me about
Gary Oldman as Dracula.

Speaker 16 (02:20:40):
Are you No, I'm going to forgive you for that.

Speaker 3 (02:20:43):
I still love you though, all right, good.

Speaker 28 (02:20:46):
Follow me on this. The year is two thousand and three.

Speaker 16 (02:20:49):
The movie Underworld comes out with Kate Beckhamsale. She looks gorgeous,
but I want to specifically draw your attention to the
unconventionally looking Britage or sales actor Michael Sheen, just as
the Leader of the Werewolves. I'm here to defend Jess's
unconventional taste in men because I watched Underworld way too young,

(02:21:10):
fell in love with the everything about Michael Sheen in
that role. And you've met my husband.

Speaker 28 (02:21:16):
I have literally married a man that has the long hair,
the blue eyes. The beard has a grundy job, very
much like the leader of the Werewolves clan has like
a very gunky persona.

Speaker 3 (02:21:29):
The Lichens. Isn't that what they were called in those movies?

Speaker 16 (02:21:32):
Yeah, the likes like it. I'm all about Jess having unconventional.

Speaker 28 (02:21:36):
Tastes in men.

Speaker 3 (02:21:37):
Oh no, I think it's great. No, Shane, I just
thought it was the juxtaposition between Steven Tyler and Jerry
Seinfeld that sent me on a trip. I love those
Underworld movies. For obvious reasons of my own, Leslie ye,
namely beck in sales and Head to Toe PVC. Michael

(02:21:58):
Sheen though a phenomenal actor. You know, there aren't that
many well known Welsh actors. There's probably a dozen of them,
and he's one of them and fantastic. But uh, there's
nothing wrong with unconventional taste. You know. People still give
me a hard time because back in the day, Rob
I said, Sarah Huckabee Sanders made it move. I don't

(02:22:20):
know why your brain tells you what you like. I
don't now is that still the case. Absolutely not. I
think she's a ghastly human being. But earlier years ago,
when she was first introduced into the public sphere, there
was something about her deep in my core tex that
made it move. But okay, thank you, Leslie, there's Leslie.

(02:22:45):
Sorry devotion. Actually, Jose Feliciano is a billionaire, but not
the Puerto Rican singer. It's a guy named Jose Feliciano
who's at some private equity firms. Hedge fund guy. Yes,
such much younger guy, much younger guy. Here's a text

(02:23:07):
three five one nine two Alan my first time seeing
Jess and then in all caps very pleasing there you go,
very pleasing, well, because you know, I'm starting a dossier
on Jess as we all get to know her collectively. Right,
her favorite film is Paul Blart Mall Cop. Now again,

(02:23:29):
you're twenty six, correct, Okay, so you would have been
ten when that was out. Fully understandable that at one
point you would have loved that movie more vexing is
why it remains your favorite movie. It's so good. I
think about what was out when I was ten, Rob,
What was out when I was ten? I was ten
in nineteen eight eighty one, Shut up, Rob, eighteen thirty two.

(02:23:53):
I'm sticking with these old things today. This is making
me feel good. The top movies of nineteen eighty one seminoid.
It was weird in the seventies and eighties. All of
the alien movies were like rape movies. That was a
real common trope in alien in semination movies. Anyway, nineteen

(02:24:14):
eighty one The Postman Always Rings twice. I was oh,
ex caliber, dude, ex caliber is the first time I
saw movies in a movie, But it's not my favorite movie.
Private lessons. This was a different time. There were a
lot of late night showtime movies about women in their
thirties who were teaching teenage boys the ways of life.

(02:24:39):
This movie called Private Lessons. The kid was like fifteen
and the woman is a tutor. There were a handful
of movies like that, My Education, Private Lessons, My Tutor,
not to be confused with My Tutor toot Er, which
was about a flatchelin teacher. Excusey escussy mins, Time Bandits,

(02:25:09):
Modern Problems, a lot of great horror films from the eighties.
I loved Galaxy of Terror. They were all rip offs
of you know, bigger movies. But anyway, Stripes nineteen eighty
one none of those movies. You know, those are movies
I liked when I was ten. Oh, I love Stripes.
None of them remained my favorite movie. I've watched Stripes recently.

(02:25:32):
Still great. Mm hm oh good for you. Hate you
Time Bandits. Anyway, I'm doing my own little dossier on
Jazz as we all get to know her, right, her
celebrity crushes Steven Tyler and a close second place Jerry Seinfeld. Right,

(02:25:56):
how do you feel about the star of Paul Blart
mall up in Kevin James, Oh, you know you'd like
to move not he's not your guy's. I don't think
Jessica Seinfeld finds him as attractive as you do.

Speaker 8 (02:26:11):
Absolutely not this Jess definitely thinks he's more attractive than her.

Speaker 3 (02:26:15):
Jess. Oh yeah, I give him a back massage, massage.
What's the deal with maes Hi? Won't telling going on
touching my back? You only know where it's gonna go
from him. Yeah, I'd give him a back massage. I
love it right into his musculature, musky. Hey, try you

(02:26:40):
get the trapezis back tackle my rhomboids. All right, So
Steven Tyler and Jerry Seinfeld, can we go one more deep?
Who gets the bronze? Okay? Nothing, it better be weird,

(02:27:02):
it better be real, and it better be weird.

Speaker 5 (02:27:04):
Well, when I was really young, day, okay, I would
go around and tell people Chad Kroger was my boyfriend.

Speaker 3 (02:27:14):
She literally you have a type. She literally told everybody,
my boyfriend lives in Canada. That story that everybody my
girl school, Well, no, he's in Canada. Chad Kroger mullet
era or cut hair era. I think the mullet era. Yeah,
probably he had like that rotiny hair.

Speaker 5 (02:27:32):
My mom told me that one. She's like I got
really embarrassed. Your mom told you that Chad Kroger was
your father. I would just go around and tell people,
use my boyfriend. Now, how old were you? I'm honest
to God, no idea old enough to know better?

Speaker 3 (02:27:45):
Well, she's only twenty six? Right here? Did that picture?

Speaker 26 (02:27:50):
No?

Speaker 17 (02:27:50):
What is it?

Speaker 5 (02:27:51):
Early?

Speaker 3 (02:27:51):
Two thousands? Two thousands. That's where I fell in love
Nickelback photograph came out in two thousand five, and I
did have a crush on doctor Phil. I will admit it.
What in the hell is happening? This is what I'm saying.

Speaker 16 (02:28:09):
Though.

Speaker 3 (02:28:10):
Your brain tells you what you find, even if it's
momentarily attractive. Right, Why I I have to I have
to own my year with Sarah Hawkaby Sanders, Doctor Phil,
and Chad Kroger. I love this She's all over the place. Wow.

Speaker 5 (02:28:28):
I didn't want to admit that. You know, after school,
at like five o'clock, doctor Soulcio would come on.

Speaker 3 (02:28:33):
I'm like, man, this guy just had knowledge? What was
it about him? You liked him for his mind? I
liked him for his knowledge knowledge. He's like, what a guy?

Speaker 5 (02:28:41):
And then I found out he wasn't a real doctor.

Speaker 3 (02:28:43):
Now he's like a ran a and then yep off
the charge like a ktesiologist or something. It was his stash,
that's what did it. And his Texas accent. Everybody likes
my mustache looks like Tennessee TUXI looks like Chumley from
Tennessee Tuxedo. It's a nice contemporary friends for the kids.
So what was how old were you in two thousand
and four? Here two thousand and four, I was five. Yeah,

(02:29:05):
so Chad Kroger was your thing in Oh my god,
two thousand five. Did you just hear that part five
in two thousand and four? Yeah, yeah, because she's twenty six.
I know, twenty six now sounds not as young as
five in two thousand.

Speaker 8 (02:29:21):
She's a year older than my son. Oh my god,
I was just drinking with over the weekend. Yeah, good
for you, Jess, I got all ahead of you. Oh yeah, Ellen,
tell Jess that she's certifiable. And her hat is giving
me a hard off. Oh your hat?

Speaker 3 (02:29:43):
What's matter with that hat? My sister would call it
a condom hat. Oh, I see, which is like a
knit cap. It is wintertime, you know what it is?
It just it looks I'm thinking because the headphones is
why here is weird.

Speaker 8 (02:29:55):
If the headphones weren't on, it would be more fitting
mushroom cap type situation.

Speaker 3 (02:30:01):
Okay, hard off, So sorry, I won't wear it tomorrow.
Oh you wear it, doubled down and wear it twice,
Wear a different color one tomorrow. Screw that guy on
this one.

Speaker 5 (02:30:12):
That's the same one, and then I have two of
a different color. Yeah, from my backup.

Speaker 8 (02:30:17):
You know this guy said you're giving him a heart off.
You really care what this guy says? Wear it twice?

Speaker 24 (02:30:21):
Yea?

Speaker 3 (02:30:21):
Where two of them tomorrow? Where two of them? Yeah,
it's not like it's Jerry Seinfeld. Could be checked Proger's. Yeah,
there's a fifty to fifty chance checked Proger's listening right now? Hey,
I want you to wear nothing but that hat.

Speaker 5 (02:30:35):
Did you say no more?

Speaker 3 (02:30:38):
Come rub my coinslot? Hey, just ay, Rob fun Fact.
I like how Jess gets second billing now, Rob, with
a lot of our listeners, did he start with Alan, Alan,
Jess and Rob? All right? I thought he just went
right to Jess. You've been relegated to the I'm alright
with that, all right?

Speaker 29 (02:30:56):
Hey, Hey, just ay Rob fun Fact. I recently found
out vampire suffer from a rhythm mamania. They have to
compulse the urge to count things in front of them.
So if you throw like a bag of rice at
a vampire, it's going to stop till accounts every grain
and you can get away. That kind of led to
wy Sesame Street has the count. I thought that was
pretty interesting. So they're slightly autistic or something. Yeah, how

(02:31:17):
about that the show? Yes, you know, a rhythmomania. Of
course that big song from the band Phoenix. He does
realize that they're also very made up. Correct, nobody is right.

Speaker 3 (02:31:28):
I remember this, oddly enough, from an old X Files episode. Okay,
that in traditional folklore, vampires have the condition he's talking about.
It's called a rhythmmania, and it's like a form of
OCD where anything they're compelled to count anything in their

(02:31:48):
environment that is like a large group of things. So
I remember this X Files episode from one hundred years
ago because that's when it was on, where like Maulder
throws a box of ice or pasta or something, and
this vampire gets down and immediately starts counting the grands
of rice. Yeah that Rob you sound skeptical.

Speaker 8 (02:32:09):
No, no, no, no, no, I I believe that that's
what vampires do, except there are no vampires.

Speaker 3 (02:32:16):
No, I'm just saying that. But that's what folklore is.
It's oral tradition. It's not history. It's not history. I'm
just saying that. It's yeah that you can't say anything
you want, Yes, but it's cotton ball's fun.

Speaker 6 (02:32:34):
Fact.

Speaker 8 (02:32:34):
Vampires also will sit and do long calculus in their
heads because they enjoy it.

Speaker 3 (02:32:40):
Can you tell me I'm wrong? Yes, prove I'm telling
you you're wrong. They've got a rhythmomania. It's hard to
say and even harder to diagnose in things that don't exist. Okay,
but we can't all balls, is right? This thing that

(02:33:01):
doesn't exist does do that? They do have that condition. Well,
you gonna make up whatever you want, right, That's what
I just said. I know, all right? Fine? Does Chad
Kroeger have routiny hair?

Speaker 20 (02:33:13):
Uh?

Speaker 5 (02:33:13):
Didn't he justin Timberlake did?

Speaker 17 (02:33:15):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (02:33:16):
Well, no, he had ramen hair. No, Chad Kroeger had
hair like the major Tings kid in the latest season
of Stranger Than.

Speaker 8 (02:33:23):
It's kind of like this Jerry curl mullet. Look at
his flowing ground work. Yeah, how about pants feet?

Speaker 3 (02:33:34):
That to me is still that's the song that's the
be all end all of all the Nickelback tracks as Pants,
and that dude gained so much respect in everybody's eyes
when he would actually play that, Like you would go
out and play pants, feet around feet.

Speaker 1 (02:33:53):
Pants around feet, d J Cummer gun.

Speaker 26 (02:34:00):
Pats around feet, pants around your feet.

Speaker 8 (02:34:08):
I like the trumpet solo in the song right Lucky drowns.

Speaker 1 (02:34:19):
The lucky around.

Speaker 3 (02:34:22):
I like your pants around your pants too, beat around
around your feet. Yeah, that's the guys fell him up one.

(02:34:48):
I like how it shows them backstage stretching before a show.
It's tough playing those quarter notes. I gotta tell you, man,
these dudes catch way too much crap. They are not
nearly as bad of a band as people make them
out to do. They have some bops list band. Dude,
I got nothing but respect for Nickelback. If it wasn't

(02:35:08):
still think their best song was their very first one.
But yeah, they're the first leader of men. Oh yeah, yeah.

Speaker 12 (02:35:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (02:35:16):
They were laughing all the way to Yeah. And they
sell out all the shows they play. Yeah, dude, people
like they go.

Speaker 8 (02:35:26):
They are and at the end of the day, dude,
the only reason people make fun of them is because
they're Nickelback. If you played those songs where Nickelback wasn't
a punchline, every single one of those dudes nickel books
but a look, I guarantee you have them on a playlist.
But the guy can write a song. But what was
the origin of that?

Speaker 3 (02:35:46):
How did Nickelback get to be I understand why Creed
did because Scott's staff they were very they started a
Christian band and that kind of ran through their thinking,
you know, very dramatic and very you know. But Chad
Kroeger wasn't that way, was he He never like took
himself too seriously or anything like that. That was never
my indication with those guys. Let's see what is wonder

(02:36:08):
where I targeted that they got to be a punchline
like that.

Speaker 8 (02:36:12):
Nickel Back is widely disliked due to a combination of
a perceived musical formula and over exposure, as well as
the bandwagon effect, where negative opinions were reinforced and amplified
by public discourse, media jokes, and internet memes.

Speaker 3 (02:36:27):
So it just excepts what I.

Speaker 8 (02:36:29):
Was gonna say, Rob, see word for word, and you're
guaranteed human.

Speaker 12 (02:36:34):
I think it's a misquote, call the Alan Cox Show,
rotten programs and very bad announcements.

Speaker 17 (02:36:40):
Two one six seven eight one double oh seven or
one three four eight one double oh seven.

Speaker 3 (02:36:56):
Calves break the streak last night. They were on a
bit of a skin. They lost their last three games,
but they righted the ship as it were, one thirty
five to one nineteen over the Pacers, who are not
a great team. But that was just the salve that
the Calves needed last night in Indianapolis. They are off tonight.

(02:37:19):
They will host the Portland Trailblazers tomorrow night clad Drexler
seven o'clock tip off tomorrow night at the Rocket Arena,
six thirty pre game shortly after we get out of here.
Friday night, the Calves remain at home. They will be
hosting Greg Popovich in the San Antonio Spurs YEP, he's
the coach up and then the Golden State Warriors on

(02:37:44):
Saturday night before they head to d C. Good choice
on the song, by the way, Policy of Truth. Such
a good song, great song from Depeche Mode. And I
was reminded somebody texted me in the break ellen, this
is why saying that honesty is the best policy is
a Lie, you guys should never admit some of these

(02:38:05):
people being on your brain. Well, listen, you know Jess
as a younger woman, had a crush on doctor Phil
I had a brief mental dalliance with Sarah Huckabye Sanders,
our own Mary Santora. Right, she divulged that she had
a crush on the late Dick Goddard. Alan, don't forget that.
Cher still makes it move for Rob. Yeah, no problems

(02:38:30):
admitting that whatsoever. But again, remember why and what it
meant at that particular time in my life. Unlike Leslie
said when she called in unconventional attraction to people. Here
with that in mind, here's a text the way that
they put this, Alan, I love John Stewart and Louis

(02:38:51):
c k. They could both pick a hole and fill
it at the same time. I assume that's an excavation
reference or well done Dustin and Georgia. He co signs. Rob.
I would still let share get it. Yeah, listen, there's
a reason her boyfriend's twenty five and she's ninety five.

(02:39:12):
I also talked about Susan Sarandon two gigantic reasons I've
always loved Susan Sarandon's seventy nine years old. I don't
think that's too far afield though. I mean, that's seventy nine.

Speaker 8 (02:39:21):
I know.

Speaker 3 (02:39:21):
But when we're talking unconventional, you know, and Jess is like, oh,
I'm hot for Steven Tyler and Jerry Seinfeld. Sure that's
really all over the place. Yeah, no, I haven't think.
I'm trying to think of another weird one.

Speaker 8 (02:39:33):
I might have.

Speaker 3 (02:39:33):
I feel like I don't have a type, but I
feel like the ones that I would pick would be
pretty conventional. You look like you'd like Martha Stewart. I
know Martha Stewart. No, she's a felon. Yeah she's nice.
I not Martha Stewart. Trying to think somebody kind of

(02:39:55):
off center that I think is foxy.

Speaker 1 (02:40:00):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (02:40:01):
Some will come to me and maybe I'll bring it
back to the table, but damn alan, with Jess's list,
I might have a shot. We don't know what you
look like, sir or Madam. Helen Hunt was a weird
when I always kind of found hot. Well, I thought
that Helen Hunt. I had a crush on her when
Mad About You was on. But she has she's aged

(02:40:28):
in a way where that has not remained for me, sure,
very very thin. I don't care for him, bony, I
like what some meet him. Bonus for the dog, rob
meat is for the man.

Speaker 8 (02:40:43):
I always I kind of found Betty White attractive when
I was younger.

Speaker 3 (02:40:50):
I say what you will when we were younger. Though
this might surprise you to know Jess Betty White also younger. Yes,
and if you go back far enough, I'm well, I'm
talking the fifties. Yeah, I wouldn't around for that. She
was cute in the fifties. Alan Nickelback concerts have the
best concentration of single MILFs. Al Right, it sounds like

(02:41:15):
they've done their own research. I'm just trying. Who else.
Nothing pops into your head me unconventionally attractive?

Speaker 13 (02:41:28):
Dave?

Speaker 3 (02:41:29):
Are you attracted to Jess? Unconventional beauties? I would literally
have to Hillary Swink, No, don't care for her. I
would literally have to google. That's what I just did,
unconventional beauties and see what women who are unconventionally beautiful like. No,
I don't care for it. No, I genuinely don't know.

(02:41:53):
Marcia Cross, No, Elizabeth Olsen, No, no again, I think
those are conventionally pretty women. I mean some people think
about somebody like till the Swinton, the mom from Brady Bunch. Oh,
I had a thing for her yet, Oh the Wesson

(02:42:13):
Oil Lady was then Florence Henderson. Or you're talking about
the movie Jess, Shelley, who was the mom in the movie,
Shelley Long. You're talking about the show or the movie?
The show show Shelley longs pretty I think everybody had
a thing for the Mom and the Brady Bunch back
in the day when you if you were of a
certain age, unconventional. I don't know.

Speaker 5 (02:42:33):
I mean, what do you think about the guy from Cheers?
Is it Ted Danson dancing?

Speaker 3 (02:42:38):
Yeah he is.

Speaker 8 (02:42:40):
I'm watching his new show looking see. You got a
thing for old guys, that's what it is. You like
you like old dudes?

Speaker 3 (02:42:45):
Is that true?

Speaker 16 (02:42:45):
Jess?

Speaker 8 (02:42:46):
Do you like you have like a daddy thing? M m,
this is granddaddy things, even daddy thing. She's gone well
past the daddy thing. The grandpa's like Papa. The grandpa's
got a pop Pop pettish. He's got a guilf Rosie
O'Donnell's on this list. Unconventionally attractive.

Speaker 3 (02:43:06):
Yeah, I don't know. I would have to see someone
and go, oh her, because in my brain I immediately
go Salma Hayek, Kim Kardashian. I don't know who's shade
about shady? You mean the sweetest taboo? Uh huh. She's
a lovely woman. But that's not somebody who would spring

(02:43:26):
to mind unconventionally, because again it's all subjective anyway. But McCarthy,
I think we know what people mean when they talk
about somebody who's conventionally attractive, Right, they're like symmetrical and
everybody thinks they're hot. Is you know, yeah, Melissa McCarthy. No,
And she's a Chicago girl, so I should be a boot.

(02:43:48):
I think she's hilarious. Why is Olivia Wilde on this list?

Speaker 8 (02:43:53):
See all the people you're rattling off to me? Way
too bony for me, way too bony.

Speaker 3 (02:43:59):
Oh melissam Carthy's yeah, but yeah, I don't know. I
mean she she's lost a lot of weights, she looks fantastic.
But somebody who's unconventionally I don't know. I don't know. Again,

(02:44:20):
like when she was an alien not no, No, these
are all people who I understand why, because they're very
angular and they're very like I get why Hollywood would
love them. Laura dern No, I just heard her on
SmartLess Laura dern No. Sissy Space no again, all super

(02:44:44):
bony like I think of Carrie. I bet Carrie Hood Ye,
Sissy's space I can carry Bonnie Hunt mm hmm. No,
she's like a mom vibe to her. But that's kind
of hot not for you. He too young?

Speaker 5 (02:45:01):
Yeah, right, Bonnie Hunt.

Speaker 3 (02:45:02):
No, I'm saying people like the is too young, like
you're in that. Oh yeah, I need pushing people in
their eighties. Yeah, Helen Mirren. Somebody said, yeah, I mean
I could see that. Helen Mirren is the example everybody
gives now of a hot older lady. They go, Helen
Mirran still got it. I'm like, yeah, but like you
don't have to have it when you're eighty. Yeah. Stephen

(02:45:26):
Kitten says, what about Rachel Dratch? No, is that the
one from SNL.

Speaker 26 (02:45:31):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (02:45:32):
She looks like grew from Despicable Poor Rachel Dratch though,
you know, she and Tina Fey came up at Second
City in Chicago and thirty Rock was written. I think
the pilot was actually shot where Tina Fey played her
roles but Liz Lemon but the main female lead was
going to be Rachel Dratch. She wrote it for her,

(02:45:54):
and the network was like, no way in hell is it.
So they got Jane Krakowski. They're like, we need somebody hot.
We know Rachel Dratch is your friend. So Rachel Dratch
would show up in little cameos on thirty Rocks. She'd
play like, you know, the animal lady or something, because
she and Tina Fey are besties. But the network was like,
there's no way Rachel Dratch is gonna be our female lead.

(02:46:14):
It does suck, Yeah, it sucks, But if you're Rachel Dratch,
you probably also saw that coming Sure Network show. Lisa Kudro,
A couple of people texted me Dougie congratulations, And I
met Dougie thirty years ago and she had more baby
fat on her, but we both did. I guess Uma Thurman,

(02:46:39):
Minie Pearl.

Speaker 5 (02:46:43):
Ah.

Speaker 6 (02:46:44):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (02:46:45):
Aubrey Plaza Now, I think Aubrey Plaza is very pretty.
I agree, And I think she's like a normal, irregular pretty.
It's like a normal you know Rose McGowan, No, no
know Ava Green Now? Ava Green for me is that rare,
bony kind of chick that I think is gorgeous if

(02:47:07):
you're not hit the Ava Green. She's in Penny Dreadful.
She's a bond girl. I think the first Daniel Craig
movie she was the bond girl. She's a vesper Lynde.

Speaker 8 (02:47:14):
Oh yeah, yeah, you know, its like she kind of has.
She has a lot of manly features too. Though, what
do you saying, Rob? I'm just saying that I think
she has very manly features. Maybe you take from that
what you want.

Speaker 3 (02:47:26):
You know, that guy did that song about how you
and I are in a secret affair, and all of
a sudden you're talking to me about how I he's
getting jealous. A lot of manly features like uh huh.
Nineteen forties Cosmas, Come on.

Speaker 20 (02:47:45):
Merry Christmas, Allen, Merry Christmas.

Speaker 3 (02:47:53):
Salan Cox one Cold Dark Christasy. Allan Cox was zom
airbout to leave.

Speaker 8 (02:47:59):
Before he got off the mic, I was like, oh
my God, told him, hold up, I have an idea
for a song about what he asked.

Speaker 1 (02:48:06):
About, how you and Rob are.

Speaker 3 (02:48:08):
In love with each other and your wives left you
for each other.

Speaker 8 (02:48:11):
He said, go on, and I said, okay, and coxes
having an affair?

Speaker 3 (02:48:20):
How is that a Christmas song? By the way it
takes place at Christmas time, Oh Coxmas song? Right? Yeah, Dave,
are you attracted to me?

Speaker 8 (02:48:29):
In rock?

Speaker 3 (02:48:33):
Cecily Strong from SNL. I think she's pretty too, sure,
Elizabeth Shoe, Allan, you like Cardi being Nicki Minaj? They
are definitely not conventionally attractive. Is that true?

Speaker 5 (02:48:42):
Though?

Speaker 3 (02:48:43):
I don't think anybody goes, oh, Cardi being Nicki Minaj
don't look I mean they do look a lot like
other people. I think Sinead O'Connor that I don't see then,
not now, well she's yet ah, Beverly di'angelo, Sandra Bullock.
I think Sandra Bullock's foxy. But again, these are not people.
I'm trying to think somebody unconventionally attractive. R Andandraw Bullock's

(02:49:06):
my hall passed with my wife. She knows. Sandy Bullet,
I don't know about now. That was when I was
twenty years ago when I said that, you know, people
gave me a hard time kind of when she first
broke people gave me a real hard time that I
thought Lady Gaga was hot. But I stand by me,
see that though, Elizabeth Shoe, for sure, Yeah, Jessica Chastain,

(02:49:28):
she's pretty. I don't care for I don't like butt chins.
I don't like cleft chins. It throws me off. It
draws my eye and it can really throw me off.
You know, we all have something. I got one eye.
It's drooper, And what am I for me? Who has
I don't care for cleft chins. Does Jessica Chastain have
a butt chin?

Speaker 17 (02:49:45):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (02:49:46):
Got that, she got that Travolta chin. Yeah. Uh, fantastic actress,
but yeah she does. It sucks that they're sinking her show.
By the way, she had a show ready to drop
and they got so much pressure. It's called The Savant
and it was supposed to Premiere Apple had this and
it was all done and ready to drop, and it

(02:50:06):
ended up Apple agreed to pull it because she plays
somebody who is like helping.

Speaker 8 (02:50:15):
God.

Speaker 3 (02:50:15):
The Trump and all his dummies flipped out and called
up Tim Cook, and I think Tim Cook was like, Okay,
we don't want to make you mad. What was she
doing in it that was bad? She's Oh, they yanked
it after Charlie Kirk got killed. Because her character is
helping to zero in on domestic terrorism and far and

(02:50:39):
away most domestic terrorism in this country is right wing.
It's not even like an issue of debate. But all
those people who get their undies in a bunch, all
the maggotypes, Okay, well sorry, I don't have to tell you.
That's just what it is. And they were getting ready
to like premiere this show, and it looked awesome. And

(02:50:59):
then and I don't know, Trump or some of his
toadies or whatever got in touch with Apple. They're like,
you can't show this. It's blah blah blah. And they
said it's being postponed. But some people are like, yeah,
is this thing ever gonna see the light of day?
When they get mad, they become ted night in Caddyshack.

Speaker 17 (02:51:18):
Is that.

Speaker 3 (02:51:23):
Monroe lmbs? You don't like butt chins? You like Demi Levado?

Speaker 8 (02:51:30):
I liked that Demi Levado naked photo shoot for Vanity Fair.
Demi Levado is not somebody who I'm like, oh right, yeah,
you might have noticed. She doesn't like spring to my mind,
you know, you want some Brian before we go. I
got more Brian always.

Speaker 26 (02:51:48):
I've been through diamonds, I've been through me. I've been
through it all. Love stinks. Love stinks.

Speaker 3 (02:51:57):
Yeah, yeah, of course with it, but he has funny.

Speaker 26 (02:52:06):
I've been through me, I've been through it all. Love stinks,
Love stinks.

Speaker 8 (02:52:13):
Yeah, yeah, I'm had the Blues, the Reds and the Pinks.

Speaker 3 (02:52:21):
I just wish he paused for the one thing the show,
love sting. No, he didn't do that. Yeah, great song,
thank you, Brian anything. Jay Giles does his fantastic that's right.
The best band from Boston yep, Jamison Gylington his full name.

(02:52:42):
We gotta go boy. We've covered a lot of ground
and then uncovered yesterday too. Yeah, really did this? Dossi
A is coming together, of course most most of it
is celebrity guys she thinks are hot. But Stephen, Stephen Tyler,
Jerry Seinfeld, Chad Kroger, doctor Phil and Ted Danson stick

(02:53:04):
down in your pipe and smoking. Try to find a
common ground in between any of them. That's the best part. Yeah, Oh,
I know, Rob. Caitlin jenner O, she is foxy. I
don't know where she came.

Speaker 8 (02:53:17):
From, Allen, you want to see me after the show.
She's burst under the sea, she shared ed and out
of her in seat. Yeah, and I think kill the guy.
Uh huh, hey listen, women drivers, Am I right?

Speaker 3 (02:53:31):
Rob? Hey, we gotta go.

Speaker 6 (02:53:33):
Ah, And now I must leave you as the Brady
bunch is on and I find four of those children
incredibly arousing.

Speaker 1 (02:53:41):
Get out here.

Speaker 10 (02:53:43):
Be careful of what you say, Be careful in every way,
Be careful of what you do. Brother is watching you.
Be circumspect and discreet. Stay light on your mental feet.

(02:54:04):
One slip and you know you're through. Big Brother is
watching you.

Speaker 30 (02:54:10):
And on with our narrative. Remember, oh, it is paid.
And when you watch that davy screens, remember it works
both ways. You disappear in a wink.

Speaker 10 (02:54:28):
Unless you can double think, you'll vanish into the blue.
Big Brother is watching you.