🚏 Have You Heard Of Fingringhoe?

Fingringhoe Parish Council's clerk has confirmed that the signs have been stolen at least three times in the past five years.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Gold, hello there.

Speaker 2 (00:01):
It's Jonesy Demander driving you home on the first day
of spring. Have you ever seen a funny sounding street
or place name sign and thought, I could do with
that in my lounge room?

Speaker 3 (00:12):
What a knobby or something.

Speaker 1 (00:13):
What a knobby. It's great. What about bald knob? Bald knob.

Speaker 2 (00:16):
If I was riding past bald knob road, that would
look good in my garage.

Speaker 3 (00:20):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (00:20):
And I used to, when I worked for a living,
I used to make street signs.

Speaker 3 (00:24):
Well, your garage is filled with them.

Speaker 1 (00:26):
I mean, allegedly.

Speaker 3 (00:27):
I mean, no, no, you've never stolen one in your life.

Speaker 1 (00:30):
All responsibly sourced. What does that mean?

Speaker 3 (00:34):
If you've got a street sign, how can it be
responsibly sourced?

Speaker 1 (00:37):
I worked in the business and I made the street signs.

Speaker 3 (00:40):
So there's some streets that don't have signs because you
took them home at the end of the day.

Speaker 2 (00:45):
No, well, there were some that might have a misprint.

Speaker 1 (00:47):
Look, this isn't about that.

Speaker 3 (00:48):
This is for another conversation.

Speaker 1 (00:49):
This is not about this.

Speaker 2 (00:50):
But, you know, I like when I go, say, Tweed Heads,
and you go to Tweed Heads and there's Tweed Heights.
But someone always nicks the T, so it's just weed heights.
And I like to see how long that lasts. It's
usually about two months. Right.

Speaker 1 (01:04):
And you can always tell because the T is brand new.

Speaker 2 (01:06):
Right.

Speaker 1 (01:06):
And the weed has got the patina. And there's always
some guy going, hey, man, look at that. That some
guy is me. That's me.

Speaker 2 (01:15):
Spare a thought for the people over in Essex at Fingeringho.
That's the name of the town, Fingeringho.

Speaker 1 (01:22):
How do you spell it? F-I-N-G-I-R-O.

Speaker 3 (01:27):
Start again.

Speaker 1 (01:28):
F-I-N-G-R-I-N-G-H-O-E.

Speaker 3 (01:31):
Finger and hoe.

Speaker 1 (01:32):
Finger and hoe.

Speaker 2 (01:33):
So they've- People steal that one. Had the signs stolen
three times in the past five years. The most recent
sign was up for just 48 hours. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:43):
So the local- You didn't get there in time.

Speaker 2 (01:45):
The councillor said, we've tried all sorts of fixings to
make it difficult, but to no avail. We are told
they are shipped to America because apparently fingering hoe is
a funny name in America. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:56):
But not in England?

Speaker 1 (01:58):
No.

Speaker 3 (01:58):
Finger and hoe isn't funny?

Speaker 2 (02:02):
It's like, you know, fanny, when we hear fanny over here.
Remember when the nanny came out? She was out on
a fanny.

Speaker 3 (02:08):
But finger and hoe would be funny in any language,
wouldn't it?

Speaker 1 (02:11):
Oh, come on. You would snigger at that. No, I'm not.

Speaker 3 (02:15):
Oh, you're not a what?

Speaker 1 (02:16):
Finish the sentence. I'm not an easy sniggerer.

Speaker 3 (02:17):
So, but.

Speaker 1 (02:19):
You know what the council have done now? A finger
and hoe? What?

Speaker 2 (02:25):
They've engraved the name of the town in a 100-kilo
concrete plinth.

Speaker 1 (02:31):
I could get that in no time. Well, you'd have
to get out a backhoe. Yeah. That'd make you giggle.

Speaker 3 (02:37):
Righto, you two.

Speaker 2 (02:38):
That's enough.

Speaker 1 (02:39):
Anyway, Weed Court is all mine, man. Isn't it just?

Speaker 3 (02:43):
Isn't it just?

Speaker 1 (02:43):
Next to Bong Bong Road.

Speaker 3 (02:44):
Well, Tick Tock Tucker is back tomorrow. We've had some
horrible things. Last week, Brian, it's a shame you missed it.
It was raw chicken inside cookie dough that we then
put in an air fryer. It made everything taste worse
than some.

Speaker 2 (02:56):
Of its parts.

Speaker 1 (02:56):
Brian's just hoping that Ryan's flight gets back tonight.

Speaker 3 (03:00):
Well, we might try something that we think might work tomorrow,
so it's nice.

Speaker 1 (03:03):
If you missed anything on the show, jonesyandamanda.com.au. Thank you, Brian.
See you tomorrow. Good day to you. Well, thank God
that's over. Catch up on the Jonesy and Amanda podcast.
Download the free iHeart app now. See you next time.
Let's get the hell out of here.